October 8, 2024 • 59 mins
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Welcome to Life Gloss, a beautypodcast for sassy and seasoned
women who have lived life andhave a drawer full of lip gloss
to prefer.
Audio Only - All Partici (00:09):
Susan, you look awfully fancy this
morning.
Um, I'm really not.
I, you know, I have a drawerfull of makeup, so I just
decided to dig through it alittle bit and just kind of say,
all right, maybe I should digout some of this stuff and start
using it.
Um, so I have two products ontoday.
Okay.
(00:30):
And I hope our audience doesn'tmind.
I'm doing my makeup while werecord because that's what The
day is like today.
Yeah.
It's like a, it's a totallygloomy, rainy Friday and it's
been a week.
So I.
Tossed on a little bit of myMerit cream blush, and, um, Oh,
(00:51):
and I may have a touch of Kosasconcealer under my eyes because
that was pretty bad thismorning.
And then I put on the Merit lip,and as you know, I really don't
wear red lipstick much unlessit's like, I don't know, special
occasion or whatever, but I justthought, I didn't have time
because I knew we had to dothis, so, I just put on the
Merit cream, little concealer,and tossed on this red lip
(01:14):
because I thought, you knowwhat?
One of the quickest looks thatyou can do when you want to look
pulled together and you don'thave any time is a little bit of
color on the cheeks and a littlebit of color on the lips and
you're out the door.
I have nothing else on.
So very French chic.
Yeah, it's kind of that Frenchchic thing, that French face
thing, you know, um, but it wasjust one of those days I
(01:37):
thought, you know, I had done amoisture mask this morning while
getting, you know, dressed andwhatever.
And I just thought my skin lookspretty good.
And You know, I don't know.
It was so gloomy outside and Ijust thought I don't want to
scare anybody.
So I'm going to toss on a redlip today.
Throwing caution to the wind,Hillary.
Well, I guess I had exactly theopposite.
(01:59):
And I'm like, I'm just going toscare the people today.
I had, I went to thedermatologist a few days ago and
I had, something's frozen,something's burned, something's
scraped and.
Look at this little blue,pardon, at something blue, like
something blue.
And then this little friend, Ithought I would share with
(02:21):
everyone because, you know, Ihad like some things that needed
to be biopsied and I said, oh,you know, while we're here
getting the results of those anddoing whatever follow up we do.
What about this little sunspotthat I see that's here and it
has kind of a scaly but not It'snot raised even or scabby or
anything.
I just noticed a difference andhe goes, oh, we can freeze that.
(02:42):
No problem.
It's a barnacle under the sea.
Yeah, I, I mean, I, okay.
I had a barnacle.
Okay, mermaid.
I, I, and, and I said, is that amedical term?
Because e as a me medicalaesthetician, that's worked
forever.
with cosmetic surgeons anddermatologists.
(03:03):
They don't use that term whenspeaking with their clients.
I've never heard the termbarnacle, but Maybe it's a
medical term.
Yeah, it's a medical term.
Okay.
Well, you know what consider meschool And like raised and
crusty and like those big Thosebig skin lesions that like
(03:23):
people that have tennised andgolfed and not worn sunscreen
their whole life So I was reallysurprised that this would
qualify as a barnacle.
So what's your excuse?
Yeah, I don't see you with aracket or a club.
I yeah, I don't know.
I grew up on a sailboat maybe Orjust that convertible you had
back in the day.
Oh, the one we took to Napa andI drove away from the gas pump
(03:46):
with the hose that the hoseattached?
It was like an episode ofZoolander.
Like, it was like, we're in thislittle car, you're driving, I'm
sitting there, and you pullaway, and I'm like, yeah, and
the man was chasing us.
Oh my god, that's so funny.
I almost forgot about thatstory.
(04:08):
You, I've never seen you sohorrified.
I was just like, well, all Icould think of was, oh my god,
we're gonna explode.
Right.
Because, Susan, it takes a lotfor her to get excited about
anything.
Kind of.
And she was just like, yeah,yeah, that, that was, that was,
I was so glad I wasn't like, youknow, smoking anything or, you
(04:31):
know, that could have beenreally bad for us, but well, in
those days easily could havebeen, yeah, that was funny now,
funny now.
Right.
Um, so we're going to talkabout, you know, aging today and
the psychology behind it.
I think we named this episode.
Who cares?
(04:52):
Because I say it.
So what do we care about?
Yeah, I do.
It's one of those expressionsthat I use a lot.
And especially with teens now, Isay it all the time.
Like, who cares?
Who cares?
No one's going to notice.
Who cares?
You know?
So I thought, who really doescare?
So let's talk about this, youknow, like it's really healthy
(05:13):
airs.
I think it's I think it's reallyhealthy and I'd like to hear
from our audience.
I had always heard as you getolder, you get wiser.
I wish I knew now, or I wish Iknew then what I know now, all
of those things.
And I think there's a lot of whocares that's liberating in that.
And I'm getting to that point.
(05:36):
Has anybody else experiencedthat?
Who cares?
Yeah, I think, you know, Ialways think of my dad.
He'll be 92, 92 or 93.
I don't know, something likethat in January.
And I always think he alwayssays, you know, who gives a
shit?
You know, like that's hisexpression to everything who
nobody gives a shit, you know,and.
(05:56):
I just think, you know what?
Joe's not wrong.
Like, nobody really, if youthink about it, the only person
who really cares is you.
I mean, not to sound like freeto be you and me here, but
nobody really does care.
I mean, you're loved ones andyou're besties and all, you
(06:18):
know, we could go on about thisstuff, but as far as beauty goes
and as far as our looks go andwhat we think people perceive us
as, nobody really does care.
And do we care?
Do we care?
Do we care if they care?
Because there's always going tobe somebody that has some random
(06:39):
crappy opinion of you, but Youknow, right.
And it's pretty healthy.
I think it's extremely healthy.
And, you know, I think thatbeauty starts in the brain.
You know, I really do.
I think beauty starts in thebrain.
Um, you and I could have, youknow, spend hours talking about
(06:59):
clients that we've had and thefirst thing that they say when
you go to even touch their faceor you go to work with them is,
you know, Oh, I haven't donethis.
Or, Oh, Oh, don't mind this.
Or, you know, we're so like meanto ourselves.
And we think that.
You see something that I don'tsee, you know, or like you're
saying, you're pointing out yourspots when we started, you know,
(07:22):
you care about that, but guesswhat?
I didn't really care, meaning Icare about you, Hill, but
meaning I didn't care enough tosay something like, well,
there's spots on your face.
It's more like, right, you care,but I don't really care, you
know, and it's not a negativething.
It's more like a, I'm notbothered, you know, I mean, I'm
(07:46):
not bothered by it.
I'm, I, it doesn't really, itdoesn't make me stop and pause.
So that being said that, youknow, beauty starts in the
brain.
I think that, you know, how weperceive ourselves is completely
different than how other peopleperceive ourselves.
For example, mentally, I feel21, but the mirror and my knees,
(08:12):
tell me something else.
So it's, you know, I talk to mymom about this all the time and
she says, Oh, I still feel likeI'm in my twenties mentally.
Right.
Obviously it's a littledifferent.
She's older now and you know,and we're all older now, but I
think it comes back to thatperception, you know, and, um,
(08:33):
what we believe is it reallyperceived, you know, You said
something interesting.
You said something interestingthere.
Um, That beauty starts in thebrain, and I think that has a
lot to do with confidence, and alot of that, who cares, it's
(08:54):
what you think, and what youproject onto other people, and
you always hear, and I'vewitnessed, that confident women
can Be wrinkly, mismatched hairgoing every which way, doing
unbelievable things thatwouldn't make sense, and they're
seen as eclectic or romantic orself-possessed or this, that, or
(09:18):
the other.
Or crazy, right, or crazy,right?
Or they have wrinkles or theyhaven't done Botox or whatever.
And it's a confidence.
And I think we see that we talkabout European women a lot, but
I think that's a very Europeanthing.
They're just confident.
So that starts on the inside andthat's a beauty thing.
(09:39):
And confidence is the sexiestthing.
I'm in Beverly Hills.
I see some of the mostbeautiful, like technically
beautiful, the symmetry thatthis.
beautiful women in the world,and they're running around like
wet puppies, like, so skittishabout their looks because
they're so insecure.
We live in a city that can breedthat.
(10:02):
But then, so you'll see thisperfect woman walking down the
street, a shadow of herself,withdrawn and very timid, and
then you'll see this woman thatis not all done and plastered
and stoned, injected and bloatedand she just glows with her head
high and exudes this sparkle andnext to each other in
(10:26):
traditional beauty values onewould be considered
traditionally beautiful and onemight even be considered dare I
say haggard but one is clearlymore beautiful.
I think it's confidence.
I do think it's confidence youknow speaking of beauty there's
wait there's someone who wantsto join the call really.
Oh, uh, Someone who reallythinks she's beautiful all the
(10:49):
time.
Oh, I know who's coming.
I'm here.
You're beautiful all the time.
Sorry, she was just scratching,so.
Yeah.
Hi.
Gigi, Gigi, Gigi.
You say hi to Hillary.
Say hi to everybody.
Hi, Gigi.
Dogs believe they're beautiful.
You tell like you're prettygirl.
(11:10):
Are you beautiful?
Look at her.
She's like, yes, yes, I am atall times at all times.
I'm beautiful.
You know, isn't it funny?
It's like, you know, kids thinkthey're believe they're
beautiful when they're young.
Right.
I mean, don't even talk aboutit.
Yeah.
Animals think they're beautifulall the time.
(11:32):
They don't talk about it.
So I think that I'm going tostand by that, that beauty does
start in the brain, you know,and it's so easy to say, you
know, Oh, we should embraceaging and embrace ourselves.
And, you know, I'm not going tosit there and say that like for
me, because that's hypocritical.
(11:52):
I highlight my hair.
I put on some today.
I actually look in the mirror.
Like I put effort into how Ilook.
I joke and say, Oh, I run aroundwith no makeup, but I do.
I care.
I care a lot.
And I grew up in this industryand I work in this industry like
you.
So we're not going to sit herethrough this episode of like,
who cares?
And Oh, we all just embraceourselves.
(12:13):
And we're off.
No, I'm going down in flames andI'm the first one to admit it,
you know, time.
I think my personal beautyconfidence comes from the fact
that I love, I enjoy puttingeffort into my looks.
I enjoy working on myself.
Um, internally, externally, butat the same time, I really don't
(12:33):
care like other people'sperception of me, meaning, you
know, Oh, I'm, I'm a certainage.
I should cut my hair or, Oh, sheshouldn't wear that lipstick
color, or maybe she didn't wearthat outfit.
Right.
It's, it's the judging that Idon't partake in.
I really don't care what otherpeople think, and I can honestly
say that and anyone that knowsme.
(12:55):
knows that I really don't, um,or I'd live a very different
life and be a different person.
I really don't care.
Right.
But I care about myself and Icare about looking good for me
and feeling good for me.
So that being said, let's gothrough some of these questions
that I sort of Put up for us tokind of talk about and see what
our listeners think about this.
Um, you know Does it bother us,you know?
(13:21):
Caring about the that the calledthe psychology of aging, you
know Does aging actually botherus my answer to that is I think
it depends on the day You know,like if I get up in the morning,
I'm feeling really goodphysically and mentally and I
get through my meditation andthe kids get out the door and,
you know, and the husband's, youknow, off to work or whatever,
(13:43):
you know, I sort of say tomyself, today's a good day.
I feel good.
I look good.
So again, beauty starts in thebrain, right?
If my day starts out, right?
I feel good.
The other day I called you fromthe car because, you know, on
the way to the Gigi's doggroomer, like, Gigi decides to,
like, shit in the backseat andthen step in it all over the
place and I pull over into aparking lot and here I am
(14:06):
cleaning dog poop out of thebackseat of a car late for an
appointment, you know, it's,it's like, Did I feel really
beautiful that day?
Did I feel my age?
Yes.
I felt glamour that day.
Did not, it was, yeah, it waspure glamour.
It was not a good day.
It was like, I mean in the big,in the big picture, this is like
(14:28):
stupid and this is such idioticstuff to even be talking about.
But to me in that moment, no.
But it doesn't get more realthan that.
Yeah, it doesn't get more realthan that.
It didn't feel good.
It didn't feel beautiful.
It didn't feel special and puttogether that day.
And inevitably it justsnowballs, right?
You're like, ah.
You go to hit reverse, you lookin the mirror, you're like, oh,
(14:50):
I look terrible.
You know?
But I didn't, but I felt it,right?
Again, beauty starts in thebrain.
So, that being said, how much doyou really care about aging?
Is it something that bothers youall the time?
Or is it something you've cometo peace with?
(15:11):
I challenge our listeners togive that a little bit of
thought and to realize that it'sa, there is a conscious effort
that has to be made that Okay, Inotice this.
How much do I care?
How much am I going to care?
And what is my position on thisgoing to be?
You have to kind of decide.
(15:32):
Remember, you're the, you're thehero.
You're the main character inyour story.
And If you decide that you carea lot about this certain thing,
then that's going to be theperception that you have.
That's going to be theperception that other people
have.
But we have those criticalpoints where for me, most
recently, it's been going to getinto my car and the way that my
(15:56):
driver's side windows are.
And I think because we live onthe hit on, on a Hill, if I'm
parked outside the way that.
I approached the vehicle.
The reflection comes from aright about here and it goes up.
So imagine putting a mirror hereand looking down into said
mirror.
And I have been catching myselfin that.
(16:17):
And I think you guys have heardme say before, I don't look like
my mother.
I went straight to grandmother,like all I see are gels and neck
and this, and it can, if thefirst time I saw it, I was like,
this is going to ruin this.
It kind of ruined my day.
I was like, it's over.
I'm old.
I look like the before picturein the plastic surgery before
(16:39):
and afters.
And I just looked haggard andold and defeated and tired.
And like, when did that facebecome my face?
Cause I don't feel like that onthe inside.
Granted, I know very few peopleare seeing me from that angle,
uh, but it was, it was a shock.
It took me aback and I had tounwind it a little bit and I had
(17:01):
to think, okay, you know what?
And that's when I startedthinking about European beauty
and everything else.
And I started thinking, Okay,I'm okay with some wrinkles and
some crinkles, but I'm going todo the best I can to at least
look healthy and vivacious andradiant.
And I decided to adopt a joy forhow I look rather than having
(17:24):
hate.
For how I look, because in thatmoment, all of a sudden, again,
I felt like I'd lost a war.
Like I'd been defeated somehow.
It was a really deep emotionalmoment.
And then I felt stupid, and thenI felt shallow, and then I beat
myself up for all of that.
So it snowballed.
And then I just had to pullmyself out by the top of my head
(17:46):
and be like, Get it together.
It's not going to, you're notgoing to age in reverse.
Like, you know, really we talkabout aging in reverse from on a
cellular level, but like, youneed to get a grip Hillary,
because again, has left thestation.
It starts in the brain.
This is what I'm talking about,you know, beauty starts in the
(18:08):
brain, how we perceiveourselves, how we think about
ourselves, it's, it's, but youknow, one thing that's really
helped me a lot.
And listening to you say that, Ithink, you know, we throw around
the word privilege a lotnowadays.
And I know it does exist andaging is a privilege.
(18:33):
It is a privilege to be here ata certain age to be able to
afford certain luxuries, to takecare of yourself, doctors,
dentists, um, the skincare Iuse, the makeup brands, all of
this stuff that I get to use tohelp me Age in a way that I'm
comfortable with is really aprivilege and I am very
(18:56):
fortunate and I am very lucky tohave the supports to be able to
age in a way that I choose.
Right.
Oh, that being put out there andthat being said, I do think that
deep down.
We all want the best forourselves.
We all want to look and feel asgood as we can.
(19:18):
And I think recognizing that inourselves is a good step to
positivity and feeling confidentas you were talking about.
And again, realizing that it isa privilege and it starts in the
brain, right?
And it shows through.
It's like, I kind of think ofmyself, you know, if I were at a
family gathering, if I werehosting, you know, Christmas, or
(19:41):
if I were hosting a party, if Iwere hosting this or that or the
other, you know, we think backto our childhoods and you
remember that aunt or that womanor the mother or the friend or
the older woman and.
There are those that were justneurotic and crazy and then
there were those that were likelaissez faire and you know,
(20:03):
there was something beautifuland I've decided that even if
that was difficult in thebeginning, that's who I'm going
to be.
Yeah.
I'm not going to let this get medown.
We can't and there's no reasonfor it to, but I think because
we grew up in beauty, we mightbe a lot harder on ourselves
(20:24):
than other people are on us.
I mean, like for me, I can'treally get Botox in my forehead
anymore because I have, youknow, a hooded lid more so on
this side than on the other.
And if I get Botox, it drops mywhole brow.
So I'm kind of like, all right,well.
I guess do I cut bangs?
I don't know.
Yeah, really.
Oh my God.
There's no need to get crazy.
(20:46):
I know.
But, you know, I think you bringup a really good point, Hilt.
You know, we grew up in thisbeauty industry.
Mm hmm.
You know, we got into it at avery young age.
Um, you especially have a, havea beauty lineage there and your
family.
Um, I know as soon as I couldstart working, one of my first
(21:06):
jobs was in a, was in a makeupshop, you know, and so I, I
think both of us have beensurrounded by this industry,
having worked in this industryfor our career.
So we have a very different sortof perspective on this.
Right.
I also think being around a lotof, you know, actors,
celebrities, musicians, youknow, all that world too.
(21:28):
Um, those are people who, youknow, their face is their
fortune, being around thatenergy, growing up magazines,
very different.
You know, everyone complainsabout social media, really being
hard on the youth.
I think magazines in their ownway were just as difficult to
grow because we looked at thosepages of 17 and teen and You
(21:50):
know, and I remember saying,well, I don't, I don't look like
that.
Like, am I okay?
Am I pretty enough?
And especially back then, like,you know, there were articles on
like, measuring your thighs andlike, yes, you had to have this
eyeshadow.
If you didn't have thiseyeshadow, you couldn't go back
to school, you know?
I don't know.
I think there were so many morerules and less acceptance of,
(22:14):
you know, diversity andindividuality back then that we
lived in a very.
Very much a pressure bubble ofbeauty versus now I look at my
daughter and her friends andthis younger teen generation and
we've talked about this before,but You know, they're growing up
in a very different time, but somuch more is accepted.
(22:36):
So many people are invited, morepeople are invited to the party
than there was when we weregrowing up.
And imagine, Hill, looking atus, the way we look, right?
If we felt like we weren't maybeinvited to that party, can you
imagine?
Other people might have feltthey, you know, their invitation
was lost in the mail too, or,you know, they weren't even on a
list.
So, I think there's so much, um,uh, you know, I mean, I keep
(23:00):
saying it through this, throughthis whole conversation.
It goes back to, it starts inthe brain.
How we perceive ourselves, youknow, is not necessarily how the
world perceives us as well.
And I think, you know, Even moreimportantly, the caring or the
not caring about how you'reaging.
Well, I have a good example ofthis that it just occurred to me
(23:23):
as a matter of fact.
So the first time that I caughtmyself in the mirror like that,
that when I really, not in themirror, in the car, in the
window, the car window, thatreally freaked me out.
I was on my way to an annualtrade show in Los Angeles.
So every year the beautyindustry comes together and they
(23:43):
do a trade show in LA and I wason my way there and I felt
pretty good.
You know, I was like, Oh, I'mgoing to go see people.
I'm going to go look forcomponents.
I'm going to look for things forclients.
I'm going to see contacts.
And I was feeling great when Ilooked in the mirror.
So I was doing my makeup, put onmy little leather pants, was
walking out the door and I feltgreat, excited.
And then I got to the car.
(24:05):
And I saw from the bottom up andeverything just went.
And I felt I was, I was, I'mjust going to admit I was
devastated.
And I went to that show and Iwent to that conference and
carried that energy.
And I felt like everyone therewas 20 years old.
(24:26):
I felt like if I was standing ina circle of people at a booth,
or even with talking to othercontacts that everyone was kind
of looking at me like.
Why she's like such an old ladyif they noticed me at all.
I felt invisible.
I felt overlooked I felt andthis is somebody with 30 years
in the beauty industry and a animpressive Successful pedigree
(24:50):
and I had the worst show theworst day.
It was awful It was absolutelyhorrifying.
In fact, I did a video because Isaw Kim and Esme there and I did
a little hello video with them,which I never posted.
You, I don't know.
I think I may have sent youphotos, lamenting being like,
look at what I look at how Ilook.
(25:10):
Oh my, it was terrible.
I've since gone back to thatshow since I changed my mind
about things and I walked intothat show not with like my head
held high like I am a queen butI walked in there fully
possessed of myself and withthat acceptance that we're
talking about like I did thework to really get there.
(25:33):
I got through the beating myselfup about all of you know those
feelings and what's wrong withme and Could I know better than
this?
Um, And it was a completelydifferent experience.
I walked up to booths, peoplewere thrilled to see me.
I was in the same circles ofconversations and people were
asking me questions.
So much of it has to do with howyou show up and how you present.
(25:54):
And that means how do you showup for yourself?
Beauty starts in the brain.
I think.
You know, humor has so much todo with it, you know, like, you
know, when you just sort of tellthe story back, you can now
laugh about it, you know, and itwas ridiculousness of the whole
(26:19):
situation, but was itridiculous?
No.
It was really like hard.
It was hard for you andterrible.
Well, I still see it all thetime when I park outside and
have to go get in that car.
And I get into the car.
Yeah, I know.
Get rid of the car.
Stop driving.
What am I doing?
Get rid of the car.
(26:40):
Like, no, I think that, youknow, all, all kidding aside,
I've just changed myrelationship with it.
Yeah, you just have to change itand, and find that humor and
say, you know, Oh my God, howlucky am I that I'm even going
to this show?
That I'm healthy enough, that Ilook good, you know, like I'm
(27:02):
going to this show.
Um, But yeah, I think humor hasso much to do with it.
Not taking ourselves soseriously.
I think that's something thathas really changed a lot.
Not taking yourself soseriously.
I know I was finally able tojoke about it.
Yeah.
I was finally able to joke aboutit with my husband.
(27:23):
Yeah, because you know, I camehome and he was like, what is
wrong with you Right, right,right.
What's wrong with you?
He was laying, yeah, he waslaying down and I just came and
crawled into bed with him and Iwas like, Ugh.
Right.
He can get me laughing, likenobody can get me laughing'cause
he'll laugh at me when I would,I would murder anybody else
laugh at me and I think I saidsomething ridiculous like.
(27:46):
I'm we're never having sex withme on top again.
No one's ever seen me from thatangle again, right?
Laughing like oh my god He'slike dramatic much dramatic much
But yeah, that's like, I mean Ifully That's like your
experience, you know, i'm neverspeaking to children again I'm,
(28:08):
not i'm never leaving the houseagain.
Like i'm gonna put a bag on myhead and just go, you know, but
You I don't know.
How do we care for ourselves nowthan we did years ago?
You know, I mean, we are anaging population.
We are an aging society.
We're a youth obsessed society,no joke.
(28:30):
And it keeps getting more andmore youth obsessed every year.
But how, what are some of thethings that You know, we're
doing now that we didn't doyears ago that, you know, in a
way, like I was talking earlieris a privilege.
It's, it's, I'm so fortunatethat I'm able to have, you know,
a trainer that I work with who'sreally making me feel good about
(28:53):
myself, um, not just externally,but internally.
Internally, psychologically, Ifeel so strong when I can lift a
heavy weight now, you know?
Um, is it the same, you know,body that I had 20 years ago?
No.
But is it a better body becauseit's given me so much?
It's given me a long life.
(29:14):
It's given me two children.
It's, you know, you cancelebrate all of those great
things.
Um, I'm still here, you know?
Um, that's exciting.
But I think I put so much moreeffort now into things like food
is medicine meditation, youknow, working out, um, longevity
(29:37):
doctor that I work with who wewill have as a guest on our
podcast because he's so amazing.
Um, you know, dermatologist.
Um, I spend more money onskincare than I do on lipstick.
I mean, there's been so manyshifts as I've aged where I put
my money.
Um, and I'm fortunate that I'mable to put it into areas that,
(29:59):
aren't just for external beauty,but internal beauty.
Like my mind is clearer andsharper and I feel better
because I have access to betterfoods, because I have access to
certain doctors, because I canwork out, things like that.
Um, and there's a beauty thatcomes from that.
You know, there's because Ithink there's a, it's an
(30:21):
honoring your body.
It's an honoring your machine.
At this point, I don't putanything with the exception of
maybe this mascara.
I don't put anything on or in mybody that doesn't serve a
purpose.
For example, every piece ofskincare that you just saw that
went onto my skin.
(30:42):
Is color plus skincare or acolor plus this, like even the
eyebrow, I use two differentthings.
They have, they have keratin inthem.
They have growth, not serums,but they have, you know,
they're, they're healing.
They nourish the hair.
They're every single thing thatI used had benefits, skincare
benefits.
And now I even look at food and,you know, we're going to a
(31:05):
restaurant opening this evening.
And I'll probably whatever,whatever is there.
But even that is like nourishingmy soul because it's making me
happy to be at that event.
You know, the most beautifulwomen in the world.
And I think we can both agreewith this are the happiest and
kindest people, you know, Imean, if you look at, you know,
(31:30):
we won't spill names or dropnames or things that we actually
know.
But if you look at, say, certaincelebrities or, you know,
musicians or whatever, and youthink to yourself, wow, they
don't.
you know, they don't look thatgreat or wow, they're not aging
well or whatever.
Sometimes you think in your, inyour head, like, well, is that
because of who they are as aperson?
(31:52):
Right.
If you see someone, you know,take all that celebrity aside.
Um, If you see someone in thesupermarket, you know, and you
think, wow, that, that person'sreally like good looking.
Like that, that's a good lookingwoman over there.
Wow.
She looks really put together.
And then, you know, you saysomething to her and she's
really kind and really nice.
And you have a little moment.
(32:13):
Yeah.
You know, you're like, wow, thebeauty really radiates.
And then you see someone whojust really is struggling or
maybe something's going on.
And sure enough, they're themeanest person in the world.
You know, they'll just cut yourcar off in the parking lot or
whatever.
And I think, And they didn'teven look good.
There you go.
It's hand in hand, you know,it's hand in hand.
Susan, speaking of that littleNapa spa weekend that we went
(32:38):
to, do you remember that therewas a very famous celebrity
there?
Of course.
Okay.
Yeah.
And what I did and what I said.
Do you remember?
Mm hmm.
The way that she was screaminglike a sea witch.
And this is, we're talkingnumber one.
(33:00):
Mm hmm.
Of all time, the most famous,and for what, five, six decades
now?
Everyone knows her.
Everyone loves her.
Everyone adores her.
She has money.
She's been with the mosthandsome men in the world.
She's, boy, the vitriol andvenom and I, I just remember
(33:21):
looking at her thinking, What a,From the man driving the golf
cart to the gentleman that shewas with, she was, she was a
barnacle, you know?
I mean, but again, it's, youknow, and in all fairness, like,
was she having a bad day?
(33:41):
Was she like, you know, whoknows?
Who knows?
But to your point, I think, um,I, I'll just always believe
this.
I think when someone walks intoa room and they're beautiful and
they command attention and theycommand the light, nine times
(34:02):
out of 10, that person is thenicest person you'll ever meet.
And I think we often getintimidated to talk to strangers
or talk to someone because, youknow, they're so beautiful or
someone's like very intimidatingand then you speak to them and
you're like, my God, they wereso nice.
You know?
That's how we're going.
Hmm.
I think it's what, what youradiate and how you feel it gets
(34:22):
back to confidence.
It gets back to feeling good inyourself, you know?
Um, well, I will tell you,Susan, that in the days when you
were training for Chanel, Imean, and so our listeners just
bear with us for a moment.
I'm going to embarrass Susan alittle bit, but if you can
picture it.
Picture it, everyone.
Susan, you walk into, first ofall, you know, you're going to a
(34:43):
Chanel training.
So it's like very, Ooh, youknow, it's the creme de la
creme, right?
You know, between like LaPrairie and Christian Dior,
still it's Chanel.
So you go into a Chanel trainingand you walk in and the banners
are up and the tables are setand everything is perfectly
branded and you're in one of themost beautiful hotels and the
silver is out for the tea andeverything is set.
(35:04):
And Susan is in her black andher white and her chanel and
she's looking very chanel butalso very edgy and very cool
because you can tell there'sthat rock and roll vibe going on
under there and at first you'rejust like oh boy oh she is like
a force and you know it was andI would hear people And they
(35:25):
were like, Oh, you know, peoplethat hadn't met you before.
And so many people are assholesin the beauty industry.
They just are.
So it would have made perfectsense if you were a total
asshole.
It's the ugliest, ugliest, mostbeautiful industry in the world.
And quite frankly, I expectedyou to be a monster, a
nightmare, the most conceited,terrible person.
(35:45):
And from the first second thatlike our little eyes met, We
were like, and every time, causeI went to your trainings all the
time as a beauty director,people that didn't know you were
at first.
stiff, but then they would seepeople trickle in that have
known you and they would kind ofbe like, oh, is she going to be
nice to me too?
(36:05):
Is she going to be nice to metoo?
And the way that you taught yourclasses and you included
everyone and you, without beingovertly pandering, you would
compliment someone's question.
They're, The way they positionedsomething you made everyone feel
included and at the end everyonefelt important They felt like
you were their friend you weretheir educator and that's why
(36:26):
whenever you travel and stillpop into chanel stores People
just lose their mind and it isit's because you were kind to
everyone and they didn'tanticipate it Because you were
so together and pretty.
I'm sure there's people outthere that will disagree with
you.
And always, but uh, you know, I,I thank you for that compliment.
(36:47):
That's very sweet of you,Hillary.
But yes, I always tried to makeeverybody feel seen.
And, um, you know, even at timeswhen I didn't.
So that's, that's, you know, Iwas wanted to bring beauty to
the beauty industry.
Thank you.
But yeah, I'm sure there weretimes I wasn't kind, you know,
and I own that.
(37:08):
And then I'm sure for themajority of it, I was like, if
you, if you were a person who,who had the same level of
passion that could match mine,there usually wasn't a problem,
you know?
And if you didn't, sometimesthere could be a problem, you
know, but no, I think that Howwe, again, how we sort of
(37:30):
perceive ourselves is, is whatwe put out there.
It's what we generate out there,you know, and I think the older
we get to the less insecure webecome.
Hopefully you do the work.
Like you said, like I had to doa lot of work on myself.
We all do a lot of work onourselves because we all,
(37:50):
especially those of us who grewup in this beauty industry,
There's so much insecurity andthere's so much self hatred and
there's so much, uh, notthinking you're good enough or
you're the best enough and youknow, and, um, we're so hard on
ourselves.
If that's the one thing that Ican tell women as they age and
as we care, Stop being so hardon yourself, you know, um, be
(38:13):
good to yourself, be, you know,care for yourself more and then
that will come across witheverybody else.
So, what parts of aging arebothering us?
Like, and how do we reconcile?
Is there a part, um, you know,uh, that, that, that is
bothering you these days?
Is there anything that?
(38:34):
You know, in particular, besidesyour, your mirror situation with
the car.
It's, I mean, it still bothersme.
My neck drives me absolutelycrazy, but.
Um, am I learning to accept it?
No.
Uh, am I working on my husbandto change it?
Yes, because he's very againstit.
And I will say my mom's had twofacelifts.
(38:56):
So when she and I are out andabout in the world and like at
trade shows, even, or if I useher as a model for something, or
I was speaking at a trade showin her, um, Metropolitan area,
not too long ago.
And we were going to walk theshow after I did my whole
presentation on stage.
I was there talking aboutretinols.
And, um, I said, just do me afavor when we walk around, just
(39:18):
don't tell people you're mymother because she always does
it.
She's like, oh, and I'm hermother.
And that was fine when I was 20,30, 40, whatever, but now
approaching 50 and with her,with her two facelifts, I find
that people, and she looksphenomenal by the way, I'm not
dissing her in any way, shape orform, but we've gotten to the
point of where we're only 20years apart.
(39:40):
That's true.
Thank you so much.
With me having early menopauseas well and her having had her
little tweaks, I've noticed thatwhen she says to people, Oh, and
I'm her mother, they look at herand then they look at me like,
what's wrong with you?
Like, why do you look like awrinkled old paper wrinkled up
(40:00):
paper bag?
And she's doesn't begin.
That's a lot of me.
So, I mean, again, you like, Iunderstand that you don't look
like hell, but that's kind of aweird, funny thing I've got
going on if I'm being honest,but you know, um, being achy was
bothering me and that's gettingbetter nutritionally.
(40:21):
Um, but also because I'm stillin the industry and, um, just
seeing the way industry, theindustry is hard on women that
are over 40, they say.
They give a lot of lip serviceto the mature woman and the
(40:42):
menopause woman.
That's because they're trying tosell her.
They don't really actually wantto see us or hear from us.
They just want us to open ourwallets.
And it's really, it's reallykind of a little bit of a burn
my side.
And I'm just, I'm figuring outhow to handle that gracefully.
(41:03):
Um, In the beauty industry.
We'll see, since I'm still, I'mstill involved.
So of course there are peoplethat, you know, come to me and
hire me.
And I would consult with manydifferent brands and do many
different things because of myexperience.
But in general, there isabsolutely in the American
beauty world.
Again, it's different withFrench brands, very different
(41:26):
with French brands.
Uh, there is.
A youth obsession and a lot ofthat has to do with social and
social media because for a whilethere all the social media
managers were, you know, 18, 19,20 years old and we had to
completely change our marketingbudgets because it went from we,
(41:47):
you know, we spend millions ofdollars in the beauty books,
which are magazines to all of asudden we're paying the social
media manager a hundred thousanddollars a year to run a campaign
because they are selling 80percent of the product.
So there was a big flip on itshead and it was typically the
younger person.
Mind you, that was almost twodecades ago, but it's still
(42:09):
stuck that the younger peoplenow know how to use AI and they
know how to do this.
They know how to do that.
So I'm just making sure that Iknow how to do all of that just
as well, if not better, reallymy only, um, thing is that it's,
it's still one of those thingsthat.
It's it is what it is.
(42:30):
We chose a hell of an industryto be in.
Yeah, we really did.
You know, it's, it's, uh, youknow, it is what it is, this
industry.
We love it.
And we hate it at the same time.
Right.
But I'm, I'm loving gettingolder.
I I'm, I'm happier.
I'm just noticing some of thesedifferences in life.
(42:52):
And just aches and pains andthings changing, but I, we, we
talk about things more now.
So we have, I'm much more gentlewith myself.
I think my post, my pre and postshower takes a little longer,
you know, because I'm drybrushing more religiously before
I'm, you know, fascia blastingor hydrating a little bit more.
(43:14):
After I'm paying attention to myjoints, you know?
Mm-Hmm.
Mm-Hmm.
I'm just, I rather thanbrutalizing my body, I was just
always pushing it and going andgoing and going, oh, yeah.
It totally turned around and nowI'm taking care of it more.
Right?
I mean, we were so mean toourselves and so hard on
ourselves.
Right.
And, and, um.
(43:35):
You know, I think there's somuch more awareness now about
taking care of ourselves fromthe inside out.
And that's something that wetalk a lot about, um, on Life
Gloss.
Beauty is, you know, beautystarts in the brain, but it also
starts in the body and thencomes out.
And everything we talk about,all the makeup tips and all the
stuff we put on and whatnot, isjust icing on a cake.
But if the cake is crumbly anddry and doesn't taste good,
(43:58):
right?
No matter how good the frostingis, you're not going to want the
cake.
So you got to start.
At the cake and frosting is allthe other frippery and things
that we put on top of it.
And we're going to bring somepeople that are actually in the
profession of psychology.
We're not going to name anynames.
(44:19):
We're talking to a few people,but we have some contacts that
have worked in beauty and havebeen coaches, psychologists,
team builders.
So there are a couple that weare talking to.
So we're going to actually.
Bring some doctors on to talkabout the psychology of aging.
(44:39):
So, and coming from the beautyindustry, you know, people that
come from beauty.
Um, and I think something thatwe also need to, you know,
really touch upon quickly is thefact that We are at the age
where we're just not taking careof ourselves and trying to age
gracefully and, you know, feelas young as physically as we do,
(45:01):
you know, mentally, I'mgeneralizing, but I'm sure most
of us after 50 still, you know,the Gen X, like we're forever
young, like in our brain andbecause we're the coolest
generation, let's face it, butwe're forever young, but I
think, um, you know, we're doingso much on the outside and
trying to work on the inside andit's constant, but at the same
(45:22):
time, you know, this whole whocares, we're also at the age
where we're caring for others.
We're caring for cats, children,spouses, um, aging parents, you
know, all at the same time.
It's like, you know, I mean, youhave our generation of women, a
lot of them.
(45:42):
You know, go through menopausethe same time their daughters
are going through puberty, um,or the same time that their, you
know, parents are getting mucholder.
Um, so like if I have an ache ora pain or something's bothering
me, you know, I'm so fortunate Istill have both my parents and I
am close to them.
Um, And I'm extremely close tomy mom, um, that I'm able to
(46:04):
reach out to her, you know, andsay, Oh, did you have this?
Or did you do that?
Or again, just another privilegeof our aging for those of us
that still have parents that wehave a relationship with, um,
and that are still here.
Don't take that for granted, youknow, as hard as it is.
I have friends caring forparents with alzheimer's Friends
(46:25):
caring for you know six spousesand and and and ill Parents and
I often think that can be reallyhard that can make you not feel
good Feel beautiful.
That is the last thing you'rethinking about is how you look
or putting on a red lipstickbecause you have so much other
stuff or kids that, you know,need extra supports.
(46:46):
Um, we all have our stuff, youknow, so remember that, you
know, remember, remember that.
Here's my little PSA when you'redriving down the street and
someone cuts you off, justbreathe for a moment and
remember, first of all, rememberhow beautiful you are inside and
out.
But remember, you don't knowsomeone else's situation.
(47:09):
Right.
Right.
And I always tell my kids hurtpeople, hurt people.
So come across someone who's notas caring or not as beautiful as
they should be.
I would bet my last.
Nickel that that person is goingthrough stuff that you know
about.
So, you know, it's a tough age,I think for those of us in our
(47:31):
fifties, um, for womenespecially because I mean, I
hate to say it and it is so trueand you know, stereotypes are
nobody's friend, but we are thecaretakers of the world.
I'm sorry.
We just are, you know, we just,we have that.
We have that chip, you know.
Um, at least most of us do.
(47:52):
So we do end up being the oneswho care.
Well, and we are magical and Iwill, I'll give a little
challenge to our listeners thatare out there.
Do like consciously if you leaveyour house, give yourself like
maybe a one day or maybe a oneweek challenge and go out into
the world and rather than justgetting through the things that
(48:15):
you need to do.
Like just having your head downand getting through the things
that you need to do.
Go out into the world and be alittle bit more conscious of the
people around you.
And I'm not saying go out thereand, you know, talk to people in
the line at the grocery store,compliment people on their
tennis shoes or the bows intheir hairs or whatever.
Don't be weird.
Don't need to get crazy.
Yeah, don't be weird.
(48:35):
Don't like be stalkery andstrange.
I mean, I live in a city whereif you go around and like talk
to random strangers, they'lllike, you'll freak them out.
That may not be the case for somany of you.
But.
You know, even just like lookingat, you know, glancing at
somebody, just smile at someoneonce in a while, wait, hold a
door, notice, because there areso many people that are really
(49:01):
hurting right now.
And we may not agree with thempolitically, socially, in any
way, shape, or form, and theymay not even appreciate or like
us.
Right.
Frankly, I mean, I lived in, Ilive in a very polarized place,
but I, someone challenged me todo this and I did.
And we are so magical and we areso powerful and every little
(49:23):
interaction that we have withsomeone.
It's the butterfly effect.
And I know it sounds like so woowoo, but it's true.
A little tiny smile.
I couldn't believe like justsmall little things like asking
people when I'm checking outsomewhere, going somewhere, just
being like, actually looking atthem and saying, how are you
(49:46):
today?
How's your day going?
Right.
Oh, hi! You know, they have tosay, Hi, how are you?
Hi, did you find everything?
Hi, la la la.
And they're used to people,like, not even looking at them
and just going through.
So, it was just that one littlething.
When you're checking outanywhere this week, make a
conscious effort to just look upand look the person in the eye
and ask them, How are you?
(50:06):
And people would just melt.
Make people feel seen, you know,I think that's spreading beauty
to me.
That's what the beauty industryshould be about is making people
feel seen and making people feelheard.
And especially as we move intothe invisible generation, um,
(50:30):
as, as individuals, it is somuch more important to see
others and be seen.
And care a lot.
I think the world would be amuch better place if everyone,
you know, told everyone thatthey were beautiful, but that's
just me living in my Susan land.
(50:51):
Um, beauty influence and beautybrands that care really quickly.
Let's touch upon this before wewrap up.
Our day of caring because, youknow, at the end of the day,
listeners, when we make thesejokes, like, you know, who
cares?
Who gives a shit?
Who cares?
Who cares?
Actually, Hilary and I really docare.
We care about you.
We care about the fact that youtook the time to even listen to
(51:12):
us.
We care about the fact that youlove our tips and techniques
and, and all of our stories.
And, um, we really care.
We care a lot about you.
Each.
So if nobody told you today, youare beautiful and we do care
about you.
And that is sincere.
And we read everything you send.
That's right.
We do do as we grow this little,this little life gloss, um, this
(51:35):
little fun beauty party for, youknow, mature women.
We do care.
We care a lot.
Actually, we care a lot morethan sometimes we let on.
Um, So beauty brands that wefind caring or comforting.
I just wrote a few down.
I think, you know, RMS, I loveRosemary Swift.
I love her little Instagramfeeds.
I love, she really cares, youknow, you know, um, and I know
(51:59):
her products are verycomforting.
They're great for more matureskins.
She cares about what goes intothem.
Um, I've always been an RMS fanfrom the first time it even ever
came out.
So I think that one cares a lot.
Um, I think Tata Harper, shecares.
I've met her.
I've had a facial actually fromher and she was so sweet and so
kind and so caring.
(52:20):
And I think she puts so muchlove into her skincare.
Um, so I know she cares.
Um, there's a new brand, newbrand alert that I'm going to
actually pick up some productsand give it a try.
Um, And that's a new cosmeticbrand called Sarah Creel.
Um, Oh, yes.
Am I saying it right?
God, Sarah, I hope I'm sayingyour name right.
(52:42):
Uh, she's a legend in theproduct development beauty
world.
She's worked for everybody.
Um, we probably all know thesame people.
And she's recently come out witha line of, um, beauty items.
Um, I say items because she'sdoing a little skincare, a
little makeup.
I think there's like only sixSKUs.
She's at Sephora.
And I'm very intrigued.
It's real luxury.
(53:04):
Uh, the packaging reminds me ofPrada Beauty when that sort of
came out.
There's a lot of luxury in it.
Uh, the ingredients look great.
And I love it's how it's, it'sreally targeted to, um, to over
40, over 50, I think.
I mean, it definitely is verytargeted and I'm excited to try
it out.
Um, so I'm going to do that.
(53:24):
Um, Clarence, I think, hasalways been comforting and
caring.
I know they're having a littleresurgence.
Um, Merit Beauty.
I'm really liking what they'redoing.
I think there's a lot of carefor more mature, um, I don't
know.
Anyone you can think of, Hil?
Yeah, I was actually justlooking because I forgot.
I lost my mind there for aminute.
So, um, Angela Caglia.
(53:46):
She has skin care.
I've had a facial with Angela.
She's lovely.
is lovely.
She really care A very calmingtouch.
So Angela Lia really cares.
Um, there, I don't know what'swrong with my brain.
Well, there's a, so many,there's a jackhammer that just
(54:09):
started going behind me, so I'mlike, yeah, what is happening
right now?
Maybe check this out.
You can add some more Stromalso.
Yeah.
Me really cares.
Ulu.
Ulu.
We just had Mel, Melanie, Elaineon Ulu.
Really cares.
He really cares.
Yeah.
And we're having Dr.
Perricone on again.
Talk about caring.
(54:30):
He really cares.
And he cares about your kids,too.
That's right.
He's coming for your kids in agood way.
We, we, there's so many more wecould add.
And, you know, we have so manyfriends in the industry with
brands and whatnot.
Um, but these were just somethat popped into our heads as we
were talking.
As far as ones we've beenthinking about recently and some
new ones we want to try, um,influencers, some other people
(54:53):
out there, uh, whether they'redoing Instagram you know, I'm
not a Tik TOK person.
I know Hillary, you find herthere all the time.
She's incredible.
Um, but on Instagram, there'ssome great people I love to
follow.
Uh, there's some great podcasts,other podcasts out there too, to
listen to, but some influencersI think that really talk very
(55:14):
eloquently.
Um, and very realistically, fromthe heart, um, Paulina
Portskova, love what she's up tothese days, just talk about
embracing, um, you know, thewhole aging process, and that's
coming from someone who, youknow, was on the cover of every
single magazine, and really,That's, that's a journey and her
(55:35):
openness.
I, I, if you haven't checked outher Instagram, I highly
recommend you do.
Um, and then of course, LisaRinna, another one who just
keeps me in stitches because,you know, she's going down in
flames and, and we're here forit.
Like she's, she's, you know, sopolarizing and I love it, you
know, cause she just, she's soopen and honest about
(55:56):
everything.
everything she's done and whoshe is and talk about
confidence.
And I think it scares a lot ofpeople, you know, because she is
so confident.
Um, Grace, Grace Ghanem, um,another influencer, I mean, just
gorgeous and her, I want hereverything that she wears.
I want Beverly Johnson.
Do you know, she's in herseventies now.
(56:16):
I'll have what she's having.
Um, Jim Tan, she's got a greatone.
California, uh, is too casual.
on Instagram.
She's absolutely stunning, uh,stunning woman.
Um, Wendy Eilert, Goodbye CropTop.
Again, someone really, reallychallenging how we think about
aging.
(56:37):
Jenna Lyons, I think, is anotherone who's out there.
Rita Moreno is talking a lot.
And I, I had the, I had thehonor of doing Rita, Rita's
makeup 20 years ago for no, uh,quit smoking PSA.
And she was incredible and she'sback and talking about
(56:58):
everything again.
And yeah, Rita's talk aboutsomeone that's been through it
and she went through it.
When there were no breaks, noprotections for women, no
breaks, everything, everythingwas allowed.
Everything was okay.
And she survived and thrived anddone so without being bitter.
(57:22):
Beauties in the brain.
Mm hmm.
Think about how beautiful youare today, inside and out.
Think about how grateful we allare to even be here, even having
these conversations, to behealthy enough, to be beautiful
enough inside and out, to dothe, you know, to even have
these conversations and to havethese talks.
(57:42):
So test your power.
Go out there into the world andSee what just changing your
behaviors just a little bit.
See how much that the rippleeffect is crazy.
We're wildly powerful.
Yeah.
So Yeah.
And while you're doing it, stayglossy.
Stay glossy.
(58:03):
We'll see you guys soon.
You have some great peoplecoming up.
Yep.
We've got a lot of excitingstuff.
Dr.
Perricone's coming up.
We're going to start talkingabout holiday.
We're going to talk about body.
We're going to talk about skinbody.
We're going to start talkingabout, you know, all the skin
that we might or might not beshowing.
(58:25):
We're also going to talk abouthair.
So let us know what you want tohear about because.
You guys might think ofsomething that just hasn't even
occurred to us before and we'rehere for it.
So we're here for it We're hereto talk about it and make sure
that everyone feels as glossy asthey can So subscribe follow us
(58:45):
on socials, please share thiswith everyone.
We're growing organically We'regrowing by leaps and bounds and
that's because of you.
So keep us on the air life glosslovers We'll see you next time.
Keep caring and stay glossy.
Stay glossy.
Welcome to Life Gloss, a beautypodcast for sassy and seasoned
women who have lived life andhave a drawer full of lip gloss
to prefer.
Audio Only - All Partici (00:09):
Susan, you look awfully fancy this
morning.
Um, I'm really not.
I, you know, I have a drawerfull of makeup, so I just
decided to dig through it alittle bit and just kind of say,
all right, maybe I should digout some of this stuff and start
using it.
Um, so I have two products ontoday.
Okay.
(00:30):
And I hope our audience doesn'tmind.
I'm doing my makeup while werecord because that's what The
day is like today.
Yeah.
It's like a, it's a totallygloomy, rainy Friday and it's
been a week.
So I.
Tossed on a little bit of myMerit cream blush, and, um, Oh,
(00:51):
and I may have a touch of Kosasconcealer under my eyes because
that was pretty bad thismorning.
And then I put on the Merit lip,and as you know, I really don't
wear red lipstick much unlessit's like, I don't know, special
occasion or whatever, but I justthought, I didn't have time
because I knew we had to dothis, so, I just put on the
Merit cream, little concealer,and tossed on this red lip
(01:14):
because I thought, you knowwhat?
One of the quickest looks thatyou can do when you want to look
pulled together and you don'thave any time is a little bit of
color on the cheeks and a littlebit of color on the lips and
you're out the door.
I have nothing else on.
So very French chic.
Yeah, it's kind of that Frenchchic thing, that French face
thing, you know, um, but it wasjust one of those days I
(01:37):
thought, you know, I had done amoisture mask this morning while
getting, you know, dressed andwhatever.
And I just thought my skin lookspretty good.
And You know, I don't know.
It was so gloomy outside and Ijust thought I don't want to
scare anybody.
So I'm going to toss on a redlip today.
Throwing caution to the wind,Hillary.
Well, I guess I had exactly theopposite.
(01:59):
And I'm like, I'm just going toscare the people today.
I had, I went to thedermatologist a few days ago and
I had, something's frozen,something's burned, something's
scraped and.
Look at this little blue,pardon, at something blue, like
something blue.
And then this little friend, Ithought I would share with
(02:21):
everyone because, you know, Ihad like some things that needed
to be biopsied and I said, oh,you know, while we're here
getting the results of those anddoing whatever follow up we do.
What about this little sunspotthat I see that's here and it
has kind of a scaly but not It'snot raised even or scabby or
anything.
I just noticed a difference andhe goes, oh, we can freeze that.
(02:42):
No problem.
It's a barnacle under the sea.
Yeah, I, I mean, I, okay.
I had a barnacle.
Okay, mermaid.
I, I, and, and I said, is that amedical term?
Because e as a me medicalaesthetician, that's worked
forever.
with cosmetic surgeons anddermatologists.
(03:03):
They don't use that term whenspeaking with their clients.
I've never heard the termbarnacle, but Maybe it's a
medical term.
Yeah, it's a medical term.
Okay.
Well, you know what consider meschool And like raised and
crusty and like those big Thosebig skin lesions that like
(03:23):
people that have tennised andgolfed and not worn sunscreen
their whole life So I was reallysurprised that this would
qualify as a barnacle.
So what's your excuse?
Yeah, I don't see you with aracket or a club.
I yeah, I don't know.
I grew up on a sailboat maybe Orjust that convertible you had
back in the day.
Oh, the one we took to Napa andI drove away from the gas pump
(03:46):
with the hose that the hoseattached?
It was like an episode ofZoolander.
Like, it was like, we're in thislittle car, you're driving, I'm
sitting there, and you pullaway, and I'm like, yeah, and
the man was chasing us.
Oh my god, that's so funny.
I almost forgot about thatstory.
(04:08):
You, I've never seen you sohorrified.
I was just like, well, all Icould think of was, oh my god,
we're gonna explode.
Right.
Because, Susan, it takes a lotfor her to get excited about
anything.
Kind of.
And she was just like, yeah,yeah, that, that was, that was,
I was so glad I wasn't like, youknow, smoking anything or, you
(04:31):
know, that could have beenreally bad for us, but well, in
those days easily could havebeen, yeah, that was funny now,
funny now.
Right.
Um, so we're going to talkabout, you know, aging today and
the psychology behind it.
I think we named this episode.
Who cares?
(04:52):
Because I say it.
So what do we care about?
Yeah, I do.
It's one of those expressionsthat I use a lot.
And especially with teens now, Isay it all the time.
Like, who cares?
Who cares?
No one's going to notice.
Who cares?
You know?
So I thought, who really doescare?
So let's talk about this, youknow, like it's really healthy
(05:13):
airs.
I think it's I think it's reallyhealthy and I'd like to hear
from our audience.
I had always heard as you getolder, you get wiser.
I wish I knew now, or I wish Iknew then what I know now, all
of those things.
And I think there's a lot of whocares that's liberating in that.
And I'm getting to that point.
(05:36):
Has anybody else experiencedthat?
Who cares?
Yeah, I think, you know, Ialways think of my dad.
He'll be 92, 92 or 93.
I don't know, something likethat in January.
And I always think he alwayssays, you know, who gives a
shit?
You know, like that's hisexpression to everything who
nobody gives a shit, you know,and.
(05:56):
I just think, you know what?
Joe's not wrong.
Like, nobody really, if youthink about it, the only person
who really cares is you.
I mean, not to sound like freeto be you and me here, but
nobody really does care.
I mean, you're loved ones andyou're besties and all, you
(06:18):
know, we could go on about thisstuff, but as far as beauty goes
and as far as our looks go andwhat we think people perceive us
as, nobody really does care.
And do we care?
Do we care?
Do we care if they care?
Because there's always going tobe somebody that has some random
(06:39):
crappy opinion of you, but Youknow, right.
And it's pretty healthy.
I think it's extremely healthy.
And, you know, I think thatbeauty starts in the brain.
You know, I really do.
I think beauty starts in thebrain.
Um, you and I could have, youknow, spend hours talking about
(06:59):
clients that we've had and thefirst thing that they say when
you go to even touch their faceor you go to work with them is,
you know, Oh, I haven't donethis.
Or, Oh, Oh, don't mind this.
Or, you know, we're so like meanto ourselves.
And we think that.
You see something that I don'tsee, you know, or like you're
saying, you're pointing out yourspots when we started, you know,
(07:22):
you care about that, but guesswhat?
I didn't really care, meaning Icare about you, Hill, but
meaning I didn't care enough tosay something like, well,
there's spots on your face.
It's more like, right, you care,but I don't really care, you
know, and it's not a negativething.
It's more like a, I'm notbothered, you know, I mean, I'm
(07:46):
not bothered by it.
I'm, I, it doesn't really, itdoesn't make me stop and pause.
So that being said that, youknow, beauty starts in the
brain.
I think that, you know, how weperceive ourselves is completely
different than how other peopleperceive ourselves.
For example, mentally, I feel21, but the mirror and my knees,
(08:12):
tell me something else.
So it's, you know, I talk to mymom about this all the time and
she says, Oh, I still feel likeI'm in my twenties mentally.
Right.
Obviously it's a littledifferent.
She's older now and you know,and we're all older now, but I
think it comes back to thatperception, you know, and, um,
(08:33):
what we believe is it reallyperceived, you know, You said
something interesting.
You said something interestingthere.
Um, That beauty starts in thebrain, and I think that has a
lot to do with confidence, and alot of that, who cares, it's
(08:54):
what you think, and what youproject onto other people, and
you always hear, and I'vewitnessed, that confident women
can Be wrinkly, mismatched hairgoing every which way, doing
unbelievable things thatwouldn't make sense, and they're
seen as eclectic or romantic orself-possessed or this, that, or
(09:18):
the other.
Or crazy, right, or crazy,right?
Or they have wrinkles or theyhaven't done Botox or whatever.
And it's a confidence.
And I think we see that we talkabout European women a lot, but
I think that's a very Europeanthing.
They're just confident.
So that starts on the inside andthat's a beauty thing.
(09:39):
And confidence is the sexiestthing.
I'm in Beverly Hills.
I see some of the mostbeautiful, like technically
beautiful, the symmetry thatthis.
beautiful women in the world,and they're running around like
wet puppies, like, so skittishabout their looks because
they're so insecure.
We live in a city that can breedthat.
(10:02):
But then, so you'll see thisperfect woman walking down the
street, a shadow of herself,withdrawn and very timid, and
then you'll see this woman thatis not all done and plastered
and stoned, injected and bloatedand she just glows with her head
high and exudes this sparkle andnext to each other in
(10:26):
traditional beauty values onewould be considered
traditionally beautiful and onemight even be considered dare I
say haggard but one is clearlymore beautiful.
I think it's confidence.
I do think it's confidence youknow speaking of beauty there's
wait there's someone who wantsto join the call really.
Oh, uh, Someone who reallythinks she's beautiful all the
(10:49):
time.
Oh, I know who's coming.
I'm here.
You're beautiful all the time.
Sorry, she was just scratching,so.
Yeah.
Hi.
Gigi, Gigi, Gigi.
You say hi to Hillary.
Say hi to everybody.
Hi, Gigi.
Dogs believe they're beautiful.
You tell like you're prettygirl.
(11:10):
Are you beautiful?
Look at her.
She's like, yes, yes, I am atall times at all times.
I'm beautiful.
You know, isn't it funny?
It's like, you know, kids thinkthey're believe they're
beautiful when they're young.
Right.
I mean, don't even talk aboutit.
Yeah.
Animals think they're beautifulall the time.
(11:32):
They don't talk about it.
So I think that I'm going tostand by that, that beauty does
start in the brain, you know,and it's so easy to say, you
know, Oh, we should embraceaging and embrace ourselves.
And, you know, I'm not going tosit there and say that like for
me, because that's hypocritical.
(11:52):
I highlight my hair.
I put on some today.
I actually look in the mirror.
Like I put effort into how Ilook.
I joke and say, Oh, I run aroundwith no makeup, but I do.
I care.
I care a lot.
And I grew up in this industryand I work in this industry like
you.
So we're not going to sit herethrough this episode of like,
who cares?
And Oh, we all just embraceourselves.
(12:13):
And we're off.
No, I'm going down in flames andI'm the first one to admit it,
you know, time.
I think my personal beautyconfidence comes from the fact
that I love, I enjoy puttingeffort into my looks.
I enjoy working on myself.
Um, internally, externally, butat the same time, I really don't
(12:33):
care like other people'sperception of me, meaning, you
know, Oh, I'm, I'm a certainage.
I should cut my hair or, Oh, sheshouldn't wear that lipstick
color, or maybe she didn't wearthat outfit.
Right.
It's, it's the judging that Idon't partake in.
I really don't care what otherpeople think, and I can honestly
say that and anyone that knowsme.
(12:55):
knows that I really don't, um,or I'd live a very different
life and be a different person.
I really don't care.
Right.
But I care about myself and Icare about looking good for me
and feeling good for me.
So that being said, let's gothrough some of these questions
that I sort of Put up for us tokind of talk about and see what
our listeners think about this.
Um, you know Does it bother us,you know?
(13:21):
Caring about the that the calledthe psychology of aging, you
know Does aging actually botherus my answer to that is I think
it depends on the day You know,like if I get up in the morning,
I'm feeling really goodphysically and mentally and I
get through my meditation andthe kids get out the door and,
you know, and the husband's, youknow, off to work or whatever,
(13:43):
you know, I sort of say tomyself, today's a good day.
I feel good.
I look good.
So again, beauty starts in thebrain, right?
If my day starts out, right?
I feel good.
The other day I called you fromthe car because, you know, on
the way to the Gigi's doggroomer, like, Gigi decides to,
like, shit in the backseat andthen step in it all over the
place and I pull over into aparking lot and here I am
(14:06):
cleaning dog poop out of thebackseat of a car late for an
appointment, you know, it's,it's like, Did I feel really
beautiful that day?
Did I feel my age?
Yes.
I felt glamour that day.
Did not, it was, yeah, it waspure glamour.
It was not a good day.
It was like, I mean in the big,in the big picture, this is like
(14:28):
stupid and this is such idioticstuff to even be talking about.
But to me in that moment, no.
But it doesn't get more realthan that.
Yeah, it doesn't get more realthan that.
It didn't feel good.
It didn't feel beautiful.
It didn't feel special and puttogether that day.
And inevitably it justsnowballs, right?
You're like, ah.
You go to hit reverse, you lookin the mirror, you're like, oh,
(14:50):
I look terrible.
You know?
But I didn't, but I felt it,right?
Again, beauty starts in thebrain.
So, that being said, how much doyou really care about aging?
Is it something that bothers youall the time?
Or is it something you've cometo peace with?
(15:11):
I challenge our listeners togive that a little bit of
thought and to realize that it'sa, there is a conscious effort
that has to be made that Okay, Inotice this.
How much do I care?
How much am I going to care?
And what is my position on thisgoing to be?
You have to kind of decide.
(15:32):
Remember, you're the, you're thehero.
You're the main character inyour story.
And If you decide that you carea lot about this certain thing,
then that's going to be theperception that you have.
That's going to be theperception that other people
have.
But we have those criticalpoints where for me, most
recently, it's been going to getinto my car and the way that my
(15:56):
driver's side windows are.
And I think because we live onthe hit on, on a Hill, if I'm
parked outside the way that.
I approached the vehicle.
The reflection comes from aright about here and it goes up.
So imagine putting a mirror hereand looking down into said
mirror.
And I have been catching myselfin that.
(16:17):
And I think you guys have heardme say before, I don't look like
my mother.
I went straight to grandmother,like all I see are gels and neck
and this, and it can, if thefirst time I saw it, I was like,
this is going to ruin this.
It kind of ruined my day.
I was like, it's over.
I'm old.
I look like the before picturein the plastic surgery before
(16:39):
and afters.
And I just looked haggard andold and defeated and tired.
And like, when did that facebecome my face?
Cause I don't feel like that onthe inside.
Granted, I know very few peopleare seeing me from that angle,
uh, but it was, it was a shock.
It took me aback and I had tounwind it a little bit and I had
(17:01):
to think, okay, you know what?
And that's when I startedthinking about European beauty
and everything else.
And I started thinking, Okay,I'm okay with some wrinkles and
some crinkles, but I'm going todo the best I can to at least
look healthy and vivacious andradiant.
And I decided to adopt a joy forhow I look rather than having
(17:24):
hate.
For how I look, because in thatmoment, all of a sudden, again,
I felt like I'd lost a war.
Like I'd been defeated somehow.
It was a really deep emotionalmoment.
And then I felt stupid, and thenI felt shallow, and then I beat
myself up for all of that.
So it snowballed.
And then I just had to pullmyself out by the top of my head
(17:46):
and be like, Get it together.
It's not going to, you're notgoing to age in reverse.
Like, you know, really we talkabout aging in reverse from on a
cellular level, but like, youneed to get a grip Hillary,
because again, has left thestation.
It starts in the brain.
This is what I'm talking about,you know, beauty starts in the
(18:08):
brain, how we perceiveourselves, how we think about
ourselves, it's, it's, but youknow, one thing that's really
helped me a lot.
And listening to you say that, Ithink, you know, we throw around
the word privilege a lotnowadays.
And I know it does exist andaging is a privilege.
(18:33):
It is a privilege to be here ata certain age to be able to
afford certain luxuries, to takecare of yourself, doctors,
dentists, um, the skincare Iuse, the makeup brands, all of
this stuff that I get to use tohelp me Age in a way that I'm
comfortable with is really aprivilege and I am very
(18:56):
fortunate and I am very lucky tohave the supports to be able to
age in a way that I choose.
Right.
Oh, that being put out there andthat being said, I do think that
deep down.
We all want the best forourselves.
We all want to look and feel asgood as we can.
(19:18):
And I think recognizing that inourselves is a good step to
positivity and feeling confidentas you were talking about.
And again, realizing that it isa privilege and it starts in the
brain, right?
And it shows through.
It's like, I kind of think ofmyself, you know, if I were at a
family gathering, if I werehosting, you know, Christmas, or
(19:41):
if I were hosting a party, if Iwere hosting this or that or the
other, you know, we think backto our childhoods and you
remember that aunt or that womanor the mother or the friend or
the older woman and.
There are those that were justneurotic and crazy and then
there were those that were likelaissez faire and you know,
(20:03):
there was something beautifuland I've decided that even if
that was difficult in thebeginning, that's who I'm going
to be.
Yeah.
I'm not going to let this get medown.
We can't and there's no reasonfor it to, but I think because
we grew up in beauty, we mightbe a lot harder on ourselves
(20:24):
than other people are on us.
I mean, like for me, I can'treally get Botox in my forehead
anymore because I have, youknow, a hooded lid more so on
this side than on the other.
And if I get Botox, it drops mywhole brow.
So I'm kind of like, all right,well.
I guess do I cut bangs?
I don't know.
Yeah, really.
Oh my God.
There's no need to get crazy.
(20:46):
I know.
But, you know, I think you bringup a really good point, Hilt.
You know, we grew up in thisbeauty industry.
Mm hmm.
You know, we got into it at avery young age.
Um, you especially have a, havea beauty lineage there and your
family.
Um, I know as soon as I couldstart working, one of my first
(21:06):
jobs was in a, was in a makeupshop, you know, and so I, I
think both of us have beensurrounded by this industry,
having worked in this industryfor our career.
So we have a very different sortof perspective on this.
Right.
I also think being around a lotof, you know, actors,
celebrities, musicians, youknow, all that world too.
(21:28):
Um, those are people who, youknow, their face is their
fortune, being around thatenergy, growing up magazines,
very different.
You know, everyone complainsabout social media, really being
hard on the youth.
I think magazines in their ownway were just as difficult to
grow because we looked at thosepages of 17 and teen and You
(21:50):
know, and I remember saying,well, I don't, I don't look like
that.
Like, am I okay?
Am I pretty enough?
And especially back then, like,you know, there were articles on
like, measuring your thighs andlike, yes, you had to have this
eyeshadow.
If you didn't have thiseyeshadow, you couldn't go back
to school, you know?
I don't know.
I think there were so many morerules and less acceptance of,
(22:14):
you know, diversity andindividuality back then that we
lived in a very.
Very much a pressure bubble ofbeauty versus now I look at my
daughter and her friends andthis younger teen generation and
we've talked about this before,but You know, they're growing up
in a very different time, but somuch more is accepted.
(22:36):
So many people are invited, morepeople are invited to the party
than there was when we weregrowing up.
And imagine, Hill, looking atus, the way we look, right?
If we felt like we weren't maybeinvited to that party, can you
imagine?
Other people might have feltthey, you know, their invitation
was lost in the mail too, or,you know, they weren't even on a
list.
So, I think there's so much, um,uh, you know, I mean, I keep
(23:00):
saying it through this, throughthis whole conversation.
It goes back to, it starts inthe brain.
How we perceive ourselves, youknow, is not necessarily how the
world perceives us as well.
And I think, you know, Even moreimportantly, the caring or the
not caring about how you'reaging.
Well, I have a good example ofthis that it just occurred to me
(23:23):
as a matter of fact.
So the first time that I caughtmyself in the mirror like that,
that when I really, not in themirror, in the car, in the
window, the car window, thatreally freaked me out.
I was on my way to an annualtrade show in Los Angeles.
So every year the beautyindustry comes together and they
(23:43):
do a trade show in LA and I wason my way there and I felt
pretty good.
You know, I was like, Oh, I'mgoing to go see people.
I'm going to go look forcomponents.
I'm going to look for things forclients.
I'm going to see contacts.
And I was feeling great when Ilooked in the mirror.
So I was doing my makeup, put onmy little leather pants, was
walking out the door and I feltgreat, excited.
And then I got to the car.
(24:05):
And I saw from the bottom up andeverything just went.
And I felt I was, I was, I'mjust going to admit I was
devastated.
And I went to that show and Iwent to that conference and
carried that energy.
And I felt like everyone therewas 20 years old.
(24:26):
I felt like if I was standing ina circle of people at a booth,
or even with talking to othercontacts that everyone was kind
of looking at me like.
Why she's like such an old ladyif they noticed me at all.
I felt invisible.
I felt overlooked I felt andthis is somebody with 30 years
in the beauty industry and a animpressive Successful pedigree
(24:50):
and I had the worst show theworst day.
It was awful It was absolutelyhorrifying.
In fact, I did a video because Isaw Kim and Esme there and I did
a little hello video with them,which I never posted.
You, I don't know.
I think I may have sent youphotos, lamenting being like,
look at what I look at how Ilook.
(25:10):
Oh my, it was terrible.
I've since gone back to thatshow since I changed my mind
about things and I walked intothat show not with like my head
held high like I am a queen butI walked in there fully
possessed of myself and withthat acceptance that we're
talking about like I did thework to really get there.
(25:33):
I got through the beating myselfup about all of you know those
feelings and what's wrong withme and Could I know better than
this?
Um, And it was a completelydifferent experience.
I walked up to booths, peoplewere thrilled to see me.
I was in the same circles ofconversations and people were
asking me questions.
So much of it has to do with howyou show up and how you present.
(25:54):
And that means how do you showup for yourself?
Beauty starts in the brain.
I think.
You know, humor has so much todo with it, you know, like, you
know, when you just sort of tellthe story back, you can now
laugh about it, you know, and itwas ridiculousness of the whole
(26:19):
situation, but was itridiculous?
No.
It was really like hard.
It was hard for you andterrible.
Well, I still see it all thetime when I park outside and
have to go get in that car.
And I get into the car.
Yeah, I know.
Get rid of the car.
Stop driving.
What am I doing?
Get rid of the car.
(26:40):
Like, no, I think that, youknow, all, all kidding aside,
I've just changed myrelationship with it.
Yeah, you just have to change itand, and find that humor and
say, you know, Oh my God, howlucky am I that I'm even going
to this show?
That I'm healthy enough, that Ilook good, you know, like I'm
(27:02):
going to this show.
Um, But yeah, I think humor hasso much to do with it.
Not taking ourselves soseriously.
I think that's something thathas really changed a lot.
Not taking yourself soseriously.
I know I was finally able tojoke about it.
Yeah.
I was finally able to joke aboutit with my husband.
(27:23):
Yeah, because you know, I camehome and he was like, what is
wrong with you Right, right,right.
What's wrong with you?
He was laying, yeah, he waslaying down and I just came and
crawled into bed with him and Iwas like, Ugh.
Right.
He can get me laughing, likenobody can get me laughing'cause
he'll laugh at me when I would,I would murder anybody else
laugh at me and I think I saidsomething ridiculous like.
(27:46):
I'm we're never having sex withme on top again.
No one's ever seen me from thatangle again, right?
Laughing like oh my god He'slike dramatic much dramatic much
But yeah, that's like, I mean Ifully That's like your
experience, you know, i'm neverspeaking to children again I'm,
(28:08):
not i'm never leaving the houseagain.
Like i'm gonna put a bag on myhead and just go, you know, but
You I don't know.
How do we care for ourselves nowthan we did years ago?
You know, I mean, we are anaging population.
We are an aging society.
We're a youth obsessed society,no joke.
(28:30):
And it keeps getting more andmore youth obsessed every year.
But how, what are some of thethings that You know, we're
doing now that we didn't doyears ago that, you know, in a
way, like I was talking earlieris a privilege.
It's, it's, I'm so fortunatethat I'm able to have, you know,
a trainer that I work with who'sreally making me feel good about
(28:53):
myself, um, not just externally,but internally.
Internally, psychologically, Ifeel so strong when I can lift a
heavy weight now, you know?
Um, is it the same, you know,body that I had 20 years ago?
No.
But is it a better body becauseit's given me so much?
It's given me a long life.
(29:14):
It's given me two children.
It's, you know, you cancelebrate all of those great
things.
Um, I'm still here, you know?
Um, that's exciting.
But I think I put so much moreeffort now into things like food
is medicine meditation, youknow, working out, um, longevity
(29:37):
doctor that I work with who wewill have as a guest on our
podcast because he's so amazing.
Um, you know, dermatologist.
Um, I spend more money onskincare than I do on lipstick.
I mean, there's been so manyshifts as I've aged where I put
my money.
Um, and I'm fortunate that I'mable to put it into areas that,
(29:59):
aren't just for external beauty,but internal beauty.
Like my mind is clearer andsharper and I feel better
because I have access to betterfoods, because I have access to
certain doctors, because I canwork out, things like that.
Um, and there's a beauty thatcomes from that.
You know, there's because Ithink there's a, it's an
(30:21):
honoring your body.
It's an honoring your machine.
At this point, I don't putanything with the exception of
maybe this mascara.
I don't put anything on or in mybody that doesn't serve a
purpose.
For example, every piece ofskincare that you just saw that
went onto my skin.
(30:42):
Is color plus skincare or acolor plus this, like even the
eyebrow, I use two differentthings.
They have, they have keratin inthem.
They have growth, not serums,but they have, you know,
they're, they're healing.
They nourish the hair.
They're every single thing thatI used had benefits, skincare
benefits.
And now I even look at food and,you know, we're going to a
(31:05):
restaurant opening this evening.
And I'll probably whatever,whatever is there.
But even that is like nourishingmy soul because it's making me
happy to be at that event.
You know, the most beautifulwomen in the world.
And I think we can both agreewith this are the happiest and
kindest people, you know, Imean, if you look at, you know,
(31:30):
we won't spill names or dropnames or things that we actually
know.
But if you look at, say, certaincelebrities or, you know,
musicians or whatever, and youthink to yourself, wow, they
don't.
you know, they don't look thatgreat or wow, they're not aging
well or whatever.
Sometimes you think in your, inyour head, like, well, is that
because of who they are as aperson?
(31:52):
Right.
If you see someone, you know,take all that celebrity aside.
Um, If you see someone in thesupermarket, you know, and you
think, wow, that, that person'sreally like good looking.
Like that, that's a good lookingwoman over there.
Wow.
She looks really put together.
And then, you know, you saysomething to her and she's
really kind and really nice.
And you have a little moment.
(32:13):
Yeah.
You know, you're like, wow, thebeauty really radiates.
And then you see someone whojust really is struggling or
maybe something's going on.
And sure enough, they're themeanest person in the world.
You know, they'll just cut yourcar off in the parking lot or
whatever.
And I think, And they didn'teven look good.
There you go.
It's hand in hand, you know,it's hand in hand.
Susan, speaking of that littleNapa spa weekend that we went
(32:38):
to, do you remember that therewas a very famous celebrity
there?
Of course.
Okay.
Yeah.
And what I did and what I said.
Do you remember?
Mm hmm.
The way that she was screaminglike a sea witch.
And this is, we're talkingnumber one.
(33:00):
Mm hmm.
Of all time, the most famous,and for what, five, six decades
now?
Everyone knows her.
Everyone loves her.
Everyone adores her.
She has money.
She's been with the mosthandsome men in the world.
She's, boy, the vitriol andvenom and I, I just remember
(33:21):
looking at her thinking, What a,From the man driving the golf
cart to the gentleman that shewas with, she was, she was a
barnacle, you know?
I mean, but again, it's, youknow, and in all fairness, like,
was she having a bad day?
(33:41):
Was she like, you know, whoknows?
Who knows?
But to your point, I think, um,I, I'll just always believe
this.
I think when someone walks intoa room and they're beautiful and
they command attention and theycommand the light, nine times
(34:02):
out of 10, that person is thenicest person you'll ever meet.
And I think we often getintimidated to talk to strangers
or talk to someone because, youknow, they're so beautiful or
someone's like very intimidatingand then you speak to them and
you're like, my God, they wereso nice.
You know?
That's how we're going.
Hmm.
I think it's what, what youradiate and how you feel it gets
(34:22):
back to confidence.
It gets back to feeling good inyourself, you know?
Um, well, I will tell you,Susan, that in the days when you
were training for Chanel, Imean, and so our listeners just
bear with us for a moment.
I'm going to embarrass Susan alittle bit, but if you can
picture it.
Picture it, everyone.
Susan, you walk into, first ofall, you know, you're going to a
(34:43):
Chanel training.
So it's like very, Ooh, youknow, it's the creme de la
creme, right?
You know, between like LaPrairie and Christian Dior,
still it's Chanel.
So you go into a Chanel trainingand you walk in and the banners
are up and the tables are setand everything is perfectly
branded and you're in one of themost beautiful hotels and the
silver is out for the tea andeverything is set.
(35:04):
And Susan is in her black andher white and her chanel and
she's looking very chanel butalso very edgy and very cool
because you can tell there'sthat rock and roll vibe going on
under there and at first you'rejust like oh boy oh she is like
a force and you know it was andI would hear people And they
(35:25):
were like, Oh, you know, peoplethat hadn't met you before.
And so many people are assholesin the beauty industry.
They just are.
So it would have made perfectsense if you were a total
asshole.
It's the ugliest, ugliest, mostbeautiful industry in the world.
And quite frankly, I expectedyou to be a monster, a
nightmare, the most conceited,terrible person.
(35:45):
And from the first second thatlike our little eyes met, We
were like, and every time, causeI went to your trainings all the
time as a beauty director,people that didn't know you were
at first.
stiff, but then they would seepeople trickle in that have
known you and they would kind ofbe like, oh, is she going to be
nice to me too?
(36:05):
Is she going to be nice to metoo?
And the way that you taught yourclasses and you included
everyone and you, without beingovertly pandering, you would
compliment someone's question.
They're, The way they positionedsomething you made everyone feel
included and at the end everyonefelt important They felt like
you were their friend you weretheir educator and that's why
(36:26):
whenever you travel and stillpop into chanel stores People
just lose their mind and it isit's because you were kind to
everyone and they didn'tanticipate it Because you were
so together and pretty.
I'm sure there's people outthere that will disagree with
you.
And always, but uh, you know, I,I thank you for that compliment.
(36:47):
That's very sweet of you,Hillary.
But yes, I always tried to makeeverybody feel seen.
And, um, you know, even at timeswhen I didn't.
So that's, that's, you know, Iwas wanted to bring beauty to
the beauty industry.
Thank you.
But yeah, I'm sure there weretimes I wasn't kind, you know,
and I own that.
(37:08):
And then I'm sure for themajority of it, I was like, if
you, if you were a person who,who had the same level of
passion that could match mine,there usually wasn't a problem,
you know?
And if you didn't, sometimesthere could be a problem, you
know, but no, I think that Howwe, again, how we sort of
(37:30):
perceive ourselves is, is whatwe put out there.
It's what we generate out there,you know, and I think the older
we get to the less insecure webecome.
Hopefully you do the work.
Like you said, like I had to doa lot of work on myself.
We all do a lot of work onourselves because we all,
(37:50):
especially those of us who grewup in this beauty industry,
There's so much insecurity andthere's so much self hatred and
there's so much, uh, notthinking you're good enough or
you're the best enough and youknow, and, um, we're so hard on
ourselves.
If that's the one thing that Ican tell women as they age and
as we care, Stop being so hardon yourself, you know, um, be
(38:13):
good to yourself, be, you know,care for yourself more and then
that will come across witheverybody else.
So, what parts of aging arebothering us?
Like, and how do we reconcile?
Is there a part, um, you know,uh, that, that, that is
bothering you these days?
Is there anything that?
(38:34):
You know, in particular, besidesyour, your mirror situation with
the car.
It's, I mean, it still bothersme.
My neck drives me absolutelycrazy, but.
Um, am I learning to accept it?
No.
Uh, am I working on my husbandto change it?
Yes, because he's very againstit.
And I will say my mom's had twofacelifts.
(38:56):
So when she and I are out andabout in the world and like at
trade shows, even, or if I useher as a model for something, or
I was speaking at a trade showin her, um, Metropolitan area,
not too long ago.
And we were going to walk theshow after I did my whole
presentation on stage.
I was there talking aboutretinols.
And, um, I said, just do me afavor when we walk around, just
(39:18):
don't tell people you're mymother because she always does
it.
She's like, oh, and I'm hermother.
And that was fine when I was 20,30, 40, whatever, but now
approaching 50 and with her,with her two facelifts, I find
that people, and she looksphenomenal by the way, I'm not
dissing her in any way, shape orform, but we've gotten to the
point of where we're only 20years apart.
(39:40):
That's true.
Thank you so much.
With me having early menopauseas well and her having had her
little tweaks, I've noticed thatwhen she says to people, Oh, and
I'm her mother, they look at herand then they look at me like,
what's wrong with you?
Like, why do you look like awrinkled old paper wrinkled up
(40:00):
paper bag?
And she's doesn't begin.
That's a lot of me.
So, I mean, again, you like, Iunderstand that you don't look
like hell, but that's kind of aweird, funny thing I've got
going on if I'm being honest,but you know, um, being achy was
bothering me and that's gettingbetter nutritionally.
(40:21):
Um, but also because I'm stillin the industry and, um, just
seeing the way industry, theindustry is hard on women that
are over 40, they say.
They give a lot of lip serviceto the mature woman and the
(40:42):
menopause woman.
That's because they're trying tosell her.
They don't really actually wantto see us or hear from us.
They just want us to open ourwallets.
And it's really, it's reallykind of a little bit of a burn
my side.
And I'm just, I'm figuring outhow to handle that gracefully.
(41:03):
Um, In the beauty industry.
We'll see, since I'm still, I'mstill involved.
So of course there are peoplethat, you know, come to me and
hire me.
And I would consult with manydifferent brands and do many
different things because of myexperience.
But in general, there isabsolutely in the American
beauty world.
Again, it's different withFrench brands, very different
(41:26):
with French brands.
Uh, there is.
A youth obsession and a lot ofthat has to do with social and
social media because for a whilethere all the social media
managers were, you know, 18, 19,20 years old and we had to
completely change our marketingbudgets because it went from we,
(41:47):
you know, we spend millions ofdollars in the beauty books,
which are magazines to all of asudden we're paying the social
media manager a hundred thousanddollars a year to run a campaign
because they are selling 80percent of the product.
So there was a big flip on itshead and it was typically the
younger person.
Mind you, that was almost twodecades ago, but it's still
(42:09):
stuck that the younger peoplenow know how to use AI and they
know how to do this.
They know how to do that.
So I'm just making sure that Iknow how to do all of that just
as well, if not better, reallymy only, um, thing is that it's,
it's still one of those thingsthat.
It's it is what it is.
(42:30):
We chose a hell of an industryto be in.
Yeah, we really did.
You know, it's, it's, uh, youknow, it is what it is, this
industry.
We love it.
And we hate it at the same time.
Right.
But I'm, I'm loving gettingolder.
I I'm, I'm happier.
I'm just noticing some of thesedifferences in life.
(42:52):
And just aches and pains andthings changing, but I, we, we
talk about things more now.
So we have, I'm much more gentlewith myself.
I think my post, my pre and postshower takes a little longer,
you know, because I'm drybrushing more religiously before
I'm, you know, fascia blastingor hydrating a little bit more.
(43:14):
After I'm paying attention to myjoints, you know?
Mm-Hmm.
Mm-Hmm.
I'm just, I rather thanbrutalizing my body, I was just
always pushing it and going andgoing and going, oh, yeah.
It totally turned around and nowI'm taking care of it more.
Right?
I mean, we were so mean toourselves and so hard on
ourselves.
Right.
And, and, um.
(43:35):
You know, I think there's somuch more awareness now about
taking care of ourselves fromthe inside out.
And that's something that wetalk a lot about, um, on Life
Gloss.
Beauty is, you know, beautystarts in the brain, but it also
starts in the body and thencomes out.
And everything we talk about,all the makeup tips and all the
stuff we put on and whatnot, isjust icing on a cake.
But if the cake is crumbly anddry and doesn't taste good,
(43:58):
right?
No matter how good the frostingis, you're not going to want the
cake.
So you got to start.
At the cake and frosting is allthe other frippery and things
that we put on top of it.
And we're going to bring somepeople that are actually in the
profession of psychology.
We're not going to name anynames.
(44:19):
We're talking to a few people,but we have some contacts that
have worked in beauty and havebeen coaches, psychologists,
team builders.
So there are a couple that weare talking to.
So we're going to actually.
Bring some doctors on to talkabout the psychology of aging.
(44:39):
So, and coming from the beautyindustry, you know, people that
come from beauty.
Um, and I think something thatwe also need to, you know,
really touch upon quickly is thefact that We are at the age
where we're just not taking careof ourselves and trying to age
gracefully and, you know, feelas young as physically as we do,
(45:01):
you know, mentally, I'mgeneralizing, but I'm sure most
of us after 50 still, you know,the Gen X, like we're forever
young, like in our brain andbecause we're the coolest
generation, let's face it, butwe're forever young, but I
think, um, you know, we're doingso much on the outside and
trying to work on the inside andit's constant, but at the same
(45:22):
time, you know, this whole whocares, we're also at the age
where we're caring for others.
We're caring for cats, children,spouses, um, aging parents, you
know, all at the same time.
It's like, you know, I mean, youhave our generation of women, a
lot of them.
(45:42):
You know, go through menopausethe same time their daughters
are going through puberty, um,or the same time that their, you
know, parents are getting mucholder.
Um, so like if I have an ache ora pain or something's bothering
me, you know, I'm so fortunate Istill have both my parents and I
am close to them.
Um, And I'm extremely close tomy mom, um, that I'm able to
(46:04):
reach out to her, you know, andsay, Oh, did you have this?
Or did you do that?
Or again, just another privilegeof our aging for those of us
that still have parents that wehave a relationship with, um,
and that are still here.
Don't take that for granted, youknow, as hard as it is.
I have friends caring forparents with alzheimer's Friends
(46:25):
caring for you know six spousesand and and and ill Parents and
I often think that can be reallyhard that can make you not feel
good Feel beautiful.
That is the last thing you'rethinking about is how you look
or putting on a red lipstickbecause you have so much other
stuff or kids that, you know,need extra supports.
(46:46):
Um, we all have our stuff, youknow, so remember that, you
know, remember, remember that.
Here's my little PSA when you'redriving down the street and
someone cuts you off, justbreathe for a moment and
remember, first of all, rememberhow beautiful you are inside and
out.
But remember, you don't knowsomeone else's situation.
(47:09):
Right.
Right.
And I always tell my kids hurtpeople, hurt people.
So come across someone who's notas caring or not as beautiful as
they should be.
I would bet my last.
Nickel that that person is goingthrough stuff that you know
about.
So, you know, it's a tough age,I think for those of us in our
(47:31):
fifties, um, for womenespecially because I mean, I
hate to say it and it is so trueand you know, stereotypes are
nobody's friend, but we are thecaretakers of the world.
I'm sorry.
We just are, you know, we just,we have that.
We have that chip, you know.
Um, at least most of us do.
(47:52):
So we do end up being the oneswho care.
Well, and we are magical and Iwill, I'll give a little
challenge to our listeners thatare out there.
Do like consciously if you leaveyour house, give yourself like
maybe a one day or maybe a oneweek challenge and go out into
the world and rather than justgetting through the things that
(48:15):
you need to do.
Like just having your head downand getting through the things
that you need to do.
Go out into the world and be alittle bit more conscious of the
people around you.
And I'm not saying go out thereand, you know, talk to people in
the line at the grocery store,compliment people on their
tennis shoes or the bows intheir hairs or whatever.
Don't be weird.
Don't need to get crazy.
Yeah, don't be weird.
(48:35):
Don't like be stalkery andstrange.
I mean, I live in a city whereif you go around and like talk
to random strangers, they'lllike, you'll freak them out.
That may not be the case for somany of you.
But.
You know, even just like lookingat, you know, glancing at
somebody, just smile at someoneonce in a while, wait, hold a
door, notice, because there areso many people that are really
(49:01):
hurting right now.
And we may not agree with thempolitically, socially, in any
way, shape, or form, and theymay not even appreciate or like
us.
Right.
Frankly, I mean, I lived in, Ilive in a very polarized place,
but I, someone challenged me todo this and I did.
And we are so magical and we areso powerful and every little
(49:23):
interaction that we have withsomeone.
It's the butterfly effect.
And I know it sounds like so woowoo, but it's true.
A little tiny smile.
I couldn't believe like justsmall little things like asking
people when I'm checking outsomewhere, going somewhere, just
being like, actually looking atthem and saying, how are you
(49:46):
today?
How's your day going?
Right.
Oh, hi! You know, they have tosay, Hi, how are you?
Hi, did you find everything?
Hi, la la la.
And they're used to people,like, not even looking at them
and just going through.
So, it was just that one littlething.
When you're checking outanywhere this week, make a
conscious effort to just look upand look the person in the eye
and ask them, How are you?
(50:06):
And people would just melt.
Make people feel seen, you know,I think that's spreading beauty
to me.
That's what the beauty industryshould be about is making people
feel seen and making people feelheard.
And especially as we move intothe invisible generation, um,
(50:30):
as, as individuals, it is somuch more important to see
others and be seen.
And care a lot.
I think the world would be amuch better place if everyone,
you know, told everyone thatthey were beautiful, but that's
just me living in my Susan land.
(50:51):
Um, beauty influence and beautybrands that care really quickly.
Let's touch upon this before wewrap up.
Our day of caring because, youknow, at the end of the day,
listeners, when we make thesejokes, like, you know, who
cares?
Who gives a shit?
Who cares?
Who cares?
Actually, Hilary and I really docare.
We care about you.
We care about the fact that youtook the time to even listen to
(51:12):
us.
We care about the fact that youlove our tips and techniques
and, and all of our stories.
And, um, we really care.
We care a lot about you.
Each.
So if nobody told you today, youare beautiful and we do care
about you.
And that is sincere.
And we read everything you send.
That's right.
We do do as we grow this little,this little life gloss, um, this
(51:35):
little fun beauty party for, youknow, mature women.
We do care.
We care a lot.
Actually, we care a lot morethan sometimes we let on.
Um, So beauty brands that wefind caring or comforting.
I just wrote a few down.
I think, you know, RMS, I loveRosemary Swift.
I love her little Instagramfeeds.
I love, she really cares, youknow, you know, um, and I know
(51:59):
her products are verycomforting.
They're great for more matureskins.
She cares about what goes intothem.
Um, I've always been an RMS fanfrom the first time it even ever
came out.
So I think that one cares a lot.
Um, I think Tata Harper, shecares.
I've met her.
I've had a facial actually fromher and she was so sweet and so
kind and so caring.
(52:20):
And I think she puts so muchlove into her skincare.
Um, so I know she cares.
Um, there's a new brand, newbrand alert that I'm going to
actually pick up some productsand give it a try.
Um, And that's a new cosmeticbrand called Sarah Creel.
Um, Oh, yes.
Am I saying it right?
God, Sarah, I hope I'm sayingyour name right.
(52:42):
Uh, she's a legend in theproduct development beauty
world.
She's worked for everybody.
Um, we probably all know thesame people.
And she's recently come out witha line of, um, beauty items.
Um, I say items because she'sdoing a little skincare, a
little makeup.
I think there's like only sixSKUs.
She's at Sephora.
And I'm very intrigued.
It's real luxury.
(53:04):
Uh, the packaging reminds me ofPrada Beauty when that sort of
came out.
There's a lot of luxury in it.
Uh, the ingredients look great.
And I love it's how it's, it'sreally targeted to, um, to over
40, over 50, I think.
I mean, it definitely is verytargeted and I'm excited to try
it out.
Um, so I'm going to do that.
(53:24):
Um, Clarence, I think, hasalways been comforting and
caring.
I know they're having a littleresurgence.
Um, Merit Beauty.
I'm really liking what they'redoing.
I think there's a lot of carefor more mature, um, I don't
know.
Anyone you can think of, Hil?
Yeah, I was actually justlooking because I forgot.
I lost my mind there for aminute.
So, um, Angela Caglia.
(53:46):
She has skin care.
I've had a facial with Angela.
She's lovely.
is lovely.
She really care A very calmingtouch.
So Angela Lia really cares.
Um, there, I don't know what'swrong with my brain.
Well, there's a, so many,there's a jackhammer that just
(54:09):
started going behind me, so I'mlike, yeah, what is happening
right now?
Maybe check this out.
You can add some more Stromalso.
Yeah.
Me really cares.
Ulu.
Ulu.
We just had Mel, Melanie, Elaineon Ulu.
Really cares.
He really cares.
Yeah.
And we're having Dr.
Perricone on again.
Talk about caring.
(54:30):
He really cares.
And he cares about your kids,too.
That's right.
He's coming for your kids in agood way.
We, we, there's so many more wecould add.
And, you know, we have so manyfriends in the industry with
brands and whatnot.
Um, but these were just somethat popped into our heads as we
were talking.
As far as ones we've beenthinking about recently and some
new ones we want to try, um,influencers, some other people
(54:53):
out there, uh, whether they'redoing Instagram you know, I'm
not a Tik TOK person.
I know Hillary, you find herthere all the time.
She's incredible.
Um, but on Instagram, there'ssome great people I love to
follow.
Uh, there's some great podcasts,other podcasts out there too, to
listen to, but some influencersI think that really talk very
(55:14):
eloquently.
Um, and very realistically, fromthe heart, um, Paulina
Portskova, love what she's up tothese days, just talk about
embracing, um, you know, thewhole aging process, and that's
coming from someone who, youknow, was on the cover of every
single magazine, and really,That's, that's a journey and her
(55:35):
openness.
I, I, if you haven't checked outher Instagram, I highly
recommend you do.
Um, and then of course, LisaRinna, another one who just
keeps me in stitches because,you know, she's going down in
flames and, and we're here forit.
Like she's, she's, you know, sopolarizing and I love it, you
know, cause she just, she's soopen and honest about
(55:56):
everything.
everything she's done and whoshe is and talk about
confidence.
And I think it scares a lot ofpeople, you know, because she is
so confident.
Um, Grace, Grace Ghanem, um,another influencer, I mean, just
gorgeous and her, I want hereverything that she wears.
I want Beverly Johnson.
Do you know, she's in herseventies now.
(56:16):
I'll have what she's having.
Um, Jim Tan, she's got a greatone.
California, uh, is too casual.
on Instagram.
She's absolutely stunning, uh,stunning woman.
Um, Wendy Eilert, Goodbye CropTop.
Again, someone really, reallychallenging how we think about
aging.
(56:37):
Jenna Lyons, I think, is anotherone who's out there.
Rita Moreno is talking a lot.
And I, I had the, I had thehonor of doing Rita, Rita's
makeup 20 years ago for no, uh,quit smoking PSA.
And she was incredible and she'sback and talking about
(56:58):
everything again.
And yeah, Rita's talk aboutsomeone that's been through it
and she went through it.
When there were no breaks, noprotections for women, no
breaks, everything, everythingwas allowed.
Everything was okay.
And she survived and thrived anddone so without being bitter.
(57:22):
Beauties in the brain.
Mm hmm.
Think about how beautiful youare today, inside and out.
Think about how grateful we allare to even be here, even having
these conversations, to behealthy enough, to be beautiful
enough inside and out, to dothe, you know, to even have
these conversations and to havethese talks.
(57:42):
So test your power.
Go out there into the world andSee what just changing your
behaviors just a little bit.
See how much that the rippleeffect is crazy.
We're wildly powerful.
Yeah.
So Yeah.
And while you're doing it, stayglossy.
Stay glossy.
(58:03):
We'll see you guys soon.
You have some great peoplecoming up.
Yep.
We've got a lot of excitingstuff.
Dr.
Perricone's coming up.
We're going to start talkingabout holiday.
We're going to talk about body.
We're going to talk about skinbody.
We're going to start talkingabout, you know, all the skin
that we might or might not beshowing.
(58:25):
We're also going to talk abouthair.
So let us know what you want tohear about because.
You guys might think ofsomething that just hasn't even
occurred to us before and we'rehere for it.
So we're here for it We're hereto talk about it and make sure
that everyone feels as glossy asthey can So subscribe follow us
(58:45):
on socials, please share thiswith everyone.
We're growing organically We'regrowing by leaps and bounds and
that's because of you.
So keep us on the air life glosslovers We'll see you next time.
Keep caring and stay glossy.
Stay glossy.
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