How Couples Transform Together - Chris Chandler part 5

Ever wondered why some people succeed in their fitness journey while others struggle? Our conversation with Chris, a successful CEO and business owner, reveals the deeply personal side of health transformation that goes far beyond physical changes.

The discussion opens with a candid exploration of gender differences in fitness journeys. Chris explains how hormonal factors create unique challenges for women compared to men, especially during different life stages. This biological reality demands greater perseverance, making the achievements of female clients particularly meaningful to him as a coach.

What sets this episode apart is the powerful insight into how couples can transform together. Chris shares how training alongside his wife created a competitive yet supportive dynamic that propelled them both forward. "We're both super competitive, so we feed off each other, push each other, and also lift each other up," he reveals. This partnership approach stands in stark contrast to the friction that often occurs when only one person in a relationship commits to change.

Perhaps the most profound moment comes when Chris articulates the true source of lasting motivation. "If I'm not proud of me, then the rest of it doesn't matter," he shares, explaining how internal validation ultimately drives sustainable change. His perspective on creating new habits, addressing the root causes of resistance, and moving forward despite inevitable setbacks offers practical wisdom for listeners at any stage of their wellness journey.

Ready to transform your own health and wellbeing? Listen now to discover how finding your authentic motivation could be the missing piece in your fitness puzzle. Then share your own experience – what finally clicked that made your health journey stick?

Support Ariel by booking a massage:
https://www.competitorsedgemassage.com/

Support Lucas by booking training:
https://www.hydefitnessconsulting.com

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Lifestyle Strength, your guide to
mastering health and well-beingin the real world.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
I'm Ariel, a massage therapist with over a decade of
experience in holistic health,and I'm here with Lucas, a
seasoned fitness coach, who'stransformed the lives of
hundreds in Northwest Arkansas.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
We're here to share real stories and expert insights
about embracing a healthylifestyle while balancing the
everyday hustle.
Join us as we explore practicalways to achieve wellness and

(00:35):
thrive amidst life's challenges.
I'd say it's a little morebroad for men, just because
physically like, it's way easieron them right to change, right
like men can go up to 55, 60,then it's pretty.
I mean anyone, anyone who doesthe work, I mean you're gonna

(00:57):
change.
Sure, women have a much moredifficult time because of the
hormonal shifts that happen from35, 45, 45, 55, 55, 65.
Our world is not conducive.
There's so much that'saffecting that hormonal balance.

(01:20):
It's a really difficult thingfor me as a coach.
I can understand how hormoneswork scientifically'm.
I'll never.
I can understand how hormoneswork scientifically, but I will
never get it.
Yeah, they'll never get it Likethey experience it Right.
And so I'm very grateful forthe women who do stick around,
who do really awesome resultsand, you know, who put their

(01:40):
faith in me to help them andthey're willing to continue
doing it Right.
That means a lot.
It means a lot more from them,because the guys is like you can
, you got it so easy and you gotit way easier.
So I don't hear it.
Like no, there's literally noexcuse.
Like you don't want to hear mecomplain about a workout we did.

Speaker 2 (01:58):
No, I mean no, there's it's.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
It's a way way more difficult, but no, I don't.
I don't think there is a amagic age.
Like everyone has a time inwhich it just it hits them.
Yeah, and it doesn't matter.
And you shouldn't feel bad ifyou, you know, if you started
thinking about it when you were35 and you just turned 40 and
you haven't taken actuallyshouldn't feel bad that you
didn't do it when you were 35,like who cares?
Just do it today.
Yeah, I love the mentality justjust do it today, because the

(02:31):
worst that could happen is thatyou stay the same tomorrow.
Right, that's the worst, rightthat can happen.
But if you just do it today andthen wake up tomorrow and you
do it again and then you do itagain, you're gonna see change.
Yeah, I mean, we're allcreatures of habit too, so if
you create a new habit thatyou're going to do it, then it's

(02:53):
, it becomes easy.
Yeah, I think that's the hardestpart is, people don't want to
change their habits, and then, Imean, that's part of the thing
I've realized too is like youchange your habits eating habits
, sleeping habits, everything,exercise habits Then it all
works.
You get these new habits thatare great for you and then you

(03:13):
just repeat them yeah, that'sreally simple.
Yeah, it doesn't have to be allat once either.
Right, you know you can.
It's it can be a lot.
You know, if you're not used tojuggling a lot of things like,
that's why it's been even moreimpressive.
You know that, that that y'allhave done it.
I think part of your, the, thesecret to your success, is y'all

(03:34):
doing it together.
I know, as as in being beingvery clear on your vision as a
couple and as a family, um, andhow you operate in your day to
day.
I think that has been a hugekey for you both.
We're both super competitive,so it's like you feed off.

(03:54):
You've seen that.
You see that when we do certainthings feed off each other, you
push each other and you alsolift each other up, uh, which is
really important.
Most people don't you, theydon't have that.
Yeah, even even if both oftheir even both of them as
spouses are doing training, um,it's, it can be kind of separate

(04:15):
, because the struggles that oneperson have may not be the same
struggles that another personhas.
Yeah, um, oftentimes I'd saymore often than not it's only
one of them is doing it andworking on themselves.
And that's even harder because,you know, like the mouse is
like, well, what the hell?
I don't feel like I need tomake this change and I want to

(04:37):
keep eating what I've beeneating.
Yeah, and that was me.
That might be worse too if thatperson doesn't seem unfit or
unhealthy.
Right, you know, especiallylike I've coached a lot of women
.
Worse, they have a hard timeand they're putting all this
effort in and their husband islike just like semi-active, semi

(05:00):
, like kind of yeah, stilldrinks, but like hasn't gotten
big, or yeah, you know.
And then there are problems.
There's health problems thatare going to come later down the
road.
Yeah, you know, visually, yes,it's hard.
Yeah, I would say that that wasus before.
We started this together andI'm so grateful that she said,
no, we're gonna do this.
And I was like, I mean, once Iwas on board, I was like so

(05:23):
grateful for for that.
Yeah, you know, it was just agreat turnaround and um, yeah, I
mean, we, we're, we'recompetitive with each other.
Um, she's a great cheerleaderand I want to be a great
cheerleader for her at the sametime, and that's, I think, like
you have to want to do thatstuff, I think, in your marriage
, and even like relationshipwith anybody, it's like you have

(05:45):
to be intentional about it andI think that's that's a big
change too.
It's like you know, realizingshe needs support, just like
she's supporting me, and thatyou know and knowing how to do
that, yeah, and that's younavigate it.
I mean, gosh, we've beenmarried a long time now and it's
like it's like it goes by sofast, but it's like, gosh, it's
like it goes by so fast, right,but it's like it's like, you
know, she's my person, she's shegets me and I know that she

(06:08):
gets me and she calls me out,which is awesome, and I need
that, yeah, in my life.
I think most of us could use it, especially men we can need.
We need a good woman to standbehind us and go hey, don't do
that, or hey, go down this path.
It's great.
Yeah, like you're doing.
Awesome, be talking about that.
This morning, I was talkingabout that with a client of mine
and you know, see, we weretalking in regards to how she's

(06:32):
always asking her husband andI'm guilty of this too.
We're like, you know.
She asked me like do something.
Like, oh, yeah, I'll do it.
Yeah, it's like she asked melike five times I still haven't
done it.
Later, yeah, and I it finallyclicked with me.
Then it was based off aconversation we had in the day
about it's not like it's howit's communicated sometimes that

(06:52):
maybe, maybe that's the secretdon't tell them to do something.
Like don't tell them like hey,and like go do this.
Nobody wants to be micromanaged.
Yeah, I was like give them shitfor not doing it.
Yeah, like put the pressure,make him, put the pressure on
himself to do it right andyou'll get whatever you want.
Because that's how I am.
I'm like I don't want, don'ttell me what to do.

(07:13):
Yeah, like I don't want to betold what to do by anybody.
Yeah, but if you make me feelbad for not doing it or I'm like
, oh man, she's called me out,yeah, then I'm gonna do it
because I don't want to seemlike, yeah, I don't seem like a
sissy.
Yeah, yeah, and that's right.
So that was funny that thatcame up, because that was based

(07:35):
off a conversation we hadyesterday.
So, chris, what would you say,wrapping up here?
What would you say to somebody,maybe a dad, another fellow CEO
, business owner, or even acouple who you know they're
thinking about making a change.
Maybe they're listening to thisand and just searching for

(07:59):
answers.
They don't already go yet.
What would you say to them?
Well, first of all, you got tofigure out how to want it.
Um, we talked about thatearlier.
Um, we all have differentreasons for wanting something.
We all have differentmotivations.
Uh, find what motivates you anduse that as your fuel to you

(08:19):
know, change your life.
Um, I think we all need fitnessin our life.
We all need and when we sayhealth, I think we always think
doctor health, it's no, it'smental health, it's our physical
health, it's our strength, it'sour, our physical health, it's
our strength, it's our, our will, it's.
There's all these thingsinvolved with it that we don't
think about as much.

(08:40):
So it's like, it's like be ableto self-examine.
Um, think about how you canimprove, why, why you want to
improve.
I think once you get down to theroot of your problems, it, it
and really kind of bring outlike, hey, this is why I want to
do this, or really change yourlife, then the rest of it's easy
.
I think, once you get started,you just got to figure it out

(09:03):
and we're all so different, weall have these different life
experiences and some had such atough childhood and such a tough
upbringing where some peoplehad a great one and you have all
the support system you need.
And it's like finding in bothscenarios we have to come to the
same realization that there'smotivation behind it.
What are we here to do?
What are we?
Are we trying to get out ofthis?
And?
And then, once you find it,magnify it so like like for me

(09:28):
it was I needed the motivation,I needed a push, and then, once
I got the push, I figured outyou know how I can improve
myself and it really helped mefeel the rest of it and now I'm
improving, hopefully, my familyand our business and my
relationships and justeverything.
It's just really changed.
I mean, it's so like fulfilling.

(09:51):
I guess once you like you lookback and go I'm so proud that I
did that.
Yeah, like that's the thing.
It's, like I've figured and goI'm so proud that I did that.
Yeah, like that's the thing.
It's like I've figured out howto make myself proud of me.
Not be proud, you know, I don't.
You've always grew up like oh,your parents are proud of you,
or your grandparents or yourfamily, or a spouse, whoever
it's like, if, if I'm not proudof me, then the rest of it
doesn't matter.

(10:12):
I gotta be proud of myself forwhat I'm trying to accomplish,
or what I'm accomplishing, whatI'm working on, and it's like
the self-awareness, therealization that we're all
humans, we're going to screw up,and it's how we get back up and
keep rocking and keep movingforward.
There's the motivation rightthere.
That's just you gotta, yougotta, you gotta keep moving.

(10:32):
That's what I'll say, chris.
Well said Well.
Uh, thanks for calling thepodcast, thanks for joining us.
Sure, I loved it.
And thank you guys forlistening.
We'll see you in the next one.