November 30, 2025 • 62 mins
What if the turning point of your life arrived the moment you finally ran out of ways to cope? That’s where Cody’s story begins to change—at the end of self-reliance and the start of grace. We walk through a childhood marked by divorce and distance, the learned art of compartmentalizing pain, and the slow magnetism of church that didn’t fully land until years later. The drift into rebellion felt inevitable; the way out did not. Then came an unexpected school pivot, a steady love in Brittany, and the painful realization that even good gifts can become idols when asked to do what only God can.
The conversation opens up on addiction, relapse, and the quiet questions that make or break transformation. Cody shares how Scripture and sermons moved from background noise to a lifeline, and how the daily fight against sin shifted once he asked, “Is Christ not enough?” We talk through the humility of waiting for calling instead of chasing titles, the joy and risk of serving youth and young adults, and the power of a local church that looks you in the eye, knows your name, and invites you into real community.
We also go where many avoid: miscarriages, the loneliness of grief, and carrying a son with anencephaly to term. You’ll hear about costly faith that chooses presence over convenience, two radiant hours with a child who changed everything, and a church that showed up with letters, meals, and a love that felt like oxygen. It’s a tender, unhurried look at suffering that refines, marriage that matures, and leadership that grows out of repentance, not performance.
If this story gives you courage, share it with someone who needs hope. Subscribe for more conversations like this, leave a review to help others find the show, and tell us: where do you need a second chance right now?
New episodes every Monday
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Intro music by Joey Blair
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_01 (00:13):
What's up, Life Talk family?
Welcome back to the Life TalkPodcast.
Nate coming to you today withI'd say a special guest, but we
got a repeat guest.
I have with me today, Cody Hall,Elder here at Lifehouse.
Cody, how's it going?
SPEAKER_00 (00:29):
That's right.
Yeah.
It's going well.
I'm trying to get my numbers up.
I know there's a uh secretcompetition going on of who's
been on the pod the most.
So this is number three for me.
So hopefully I'm nearing the topof the chart.
SPEAKER_01 (00:41):
That's exactly right.
You are moving up in the elderuh podcast rankings.
So we're getting another one in.
Don't say we're not looking outfor you.
SPEAKER_00 (00:48):
Yeah, I appreciate it.
SPEAKER_01 (00:50):
But we'll appreciate you taking some time for us
today for the Life Talk family.
We have journeyed through themonth of November.
Uh, we've done a number of weekson We Work, and Cody even was uh
kicking that off for us back thefirst week in November.
So encourage everybody, if youhave not listened to that
episode, please go back, checkit out, hear Cody's Heart for
(01:10):
work in our lives was really agreat opportunity to hear from
you and when you spoke uh inchurch that Sunday.
But today we are here to hearCody's story for the Life Talk
family.
Uh, one of our hearts behind theLife Talk podcast is for
Lifehouse to Know Life House.
If you come here, we want you tofeel really in touch and uh just
be open as those who lead.
(01:31):
And again, Cody serves as anelder here, helps with LYA,
young married, uh, wears a lotof hats.
Certainly he lives out that wework mentality, but we just want
to hear his story.
I'm sure it will be veryencouraging as many of us here
didn't start like we weretalking about before we jumped
on the podcast.
We didn't fall out of the wombas leaders, and God had to do a
(01:53):
lot of work in our lives.
So absolutely.
Our stories are his stories.
But yeah, as we always do, Cody,if you want to kick us off,
maybe your earliest memories,you know, of of a young, young
Cody where where it kind of allstarted in in the memory banks.
SPEAKER_00 (02:07):
Yeah, so a lot of people probably don't know this.
Um, but I was actually born inNebraska, Grand Island,
Nebraska.
And yeah, love the Huskers.
Um, and you know, it it's asmaller town, um, not one of the
smallest.
There's certainly uh manysmaller towns in Nebraska.
So I wasn't there for too long.
(02:30):
Uh due to the nature of my mom'sjob, uh, she worked for the
racetrack, and that took us allover the place.
We moved to Iowa, to Wisconsin,to Minnesota, um, and then back
to Nebraska for a time.
Um, and so in this time, uh, Iwas about between one and two,
(02:50):
about one and a half, I wouldsay.
And um, my parents had split.
Uh, they divorced, and it'ssomething that really is kind of
a key memory for me.
Um, and I think it really theLord used that memory uh in
coming to faith and in sort ofredeeming that.
(03:10):
Uh it's something that uh amemory that me and my sister
share.
It's it's an imperfect memory.
We learned later there are moredetails to it, but it was in in
our mind, it was the night thatmy dad left.
And I can remember where wewere, we were all together in
one room, and I just have uh aclear picture of that.
They have the same kind ofclear, vivid memory of that
(03:33):
night.
And you know, being one and ahalf, I know that that's not
just because um for no reason,right?
There's something about thatthat imprinted on me, uh, left
some scar tissue.
Uh and so going from there, uh,when I was about five, my mom
(03:54):
was a single mother, and shewas, you know, looking for a new
way to provide for her threeyoung kids.
She just was done with the uhtraveling circuit of the
racetrack and wanted somethingmore stable for her family.
And so uh we stayed in Nebraskafor a summer and she came out
actually here to Delaware andgot established at Delaware
(04:17):
Park.
And um in the fall, we joinedher out here.
We were moved out here.
Um, and so I began my schoolingout here, and you know, again,
my dad was far away.
He was in Nebraska for a time,he was in Arizona for a time,
and we would see him once ortwice a year.
Uh, but that was difficult uh asa young man growing up and not
(04:40):
having your dad around for allthose regular things, and I know
uh he would have loved to havebeen there for those things, but
you know, due to the brokennessof our situation, his situation,
he just wasn't there.
And uh so that created, youknow, a lot of insecurity in me
as a young man.
Um, going to events, going tosporting uh uh hobbies and and
(05:07):
and not having him there with meand seeing the other young boys
with their dads and their dadscoaching them, encouraging them.
Um, you know, I was a prettyquiet kid.
And so I wore it well.
I was able to, my I mean, mywhole family were just master
compartmentalizers, and so Ilearned that from a young age.
(05:27):
And yeah, grew up in a Catholicfamily.
Um, but I wouldn't say uh, atleast for my mom and us when we
came out here, we attended masssometimes, but it was it grew uh
fewer and far between um in ourattendance, and so it wasn't
(05:51):
really a part of our lives.
And I can remember another corememory of mine.
Uh I was seven and one of myfriends, I slept over his house,
and he asked if I could go tochurch with them.
And I remember going to thechurch, and again, I wasn't in a
a church attending family atthat time, and there was
(06:15):
something about being there.
I just felt like I wanted tostay there forever.
I just there was something aboutthe church itself that my heart
was just ignited at that moment,but then you know, went back
home and uh again, I was quiet.
I didn't really tell anyoneabout that, and so just went
(06:36):
back to normal rhythms of life.
And it wasn't until I was about11 years old when my mom began
to attend church, and she endedup actually getting saved,
believing in the Lord.
And I think because of all thethings that I had been exposed
to growing up in a non-Christianhome, um, growing up surrounded
(07:00):
by worldliness, and uh, youknow, at that age, 11 years old,
you really pre-puberty, justbeginning to get into uh
worldliness.
And um it was, I always say itwas almost a little too late for
me at that point.
So I began attending church withher, but the world had its claws
(07:23):
into me already.
And so for her, though, it was aradical change.
The Lord had captivated her andcompletely transformed her
heart, and you know that thatburdened her, that she knew that
she had been apart from the Lordfor so long and she worried that
her kids were ruined, and uh,you guys had her on the pod, you
(07:47):
got to hear her speak aboutthat, and um, and yet, you know,
the Lord was faithful and hecomforted her and gave her great
promises in his word, and sheheld fast to those things.
She really believed them and sheprayed for us constantly.
But yeah, that began my sort ofrebellious downturn around 11,
(08:10):
12 years old.
Uh, and I don't know how muchyou want to go into that.
SPEAKER_01 (08:15):
Yeah, no, I think maybe it'd be interesting too,
you know.
Of course, you see that changein your mom, but you felt, you
know, that's not where you'reat.
You kind of, because of thebrokenness of the home, you
know, how did that really playout for you?
I'm sure she took you to church,you know, kind of getting in,
but just not able to hear, noears to hear, just too much at
(08:39):
that point, or but how did yousee kind of God's faithfulness
even in in some of those toughtimes and and what you work
through then?
SPEAKER_00 (08:47):
Yeah, she she made it a rule that if you were under
her roof, you were going tochurch.
And I appreciate that nowadays.
Um at the time, of course, Ihated it.
I despised that she made me goon Wednesdays, made me go on
Sundays.
Uh and you know, the Lord was sofaithful, even in that time, to
(09:07):
put men in my life, even thoughI didn't appreciate them at that
time, but men that invested inme, even if a little bit.
Um, I think because of myexperience, um, I was naturally
skeptical of male figures.
And so I it was difficult forany of them to really penetrate
(09:29):
the walls that I had put up.
And but now I can look back andsee how I have learned so much
from them, even if I didn'tlearn it at that time.
And so I I think during thattime, yeah, I was going, but I
had no ears to hear.
I you see it all the time,right?
When we go to church and youjust see there are children who
(09:52):
are completely disinterested,and and that was me.
I was just looking to try andfall asleep when I could in
service and wait till I got anelbow in the side or something.
And yeah.
And so after a few years, I Iwas able to convince my mom that
(10:13):
I didn't need to go anymore, andI stopped going.
And um yeah, I just I began topursue all the things of the
world um from a young age.
Started sneaking out of thehouse at eleven and um just
getting into uh more and morenonsense and surrounded by a
(10:34):
company of fools, I was I sadlyI'd say the ringleader of fools.
I was, you know, what Romans 1says, where they not only sin,
but they give approval to thosethat do it.
And and that was me for sure.
I wanted to drag everyone intomy sinful little world.
And I don't know, it it was a asad time.
(10:58):
Um like I said during the highschool years, you know,
especially, or yeah, this wasleading up to high school and um
so sneaking out before highschool and getting out in the
neighborhood.
Yeah, I mean, my mom was againproviding for her for us, and so
she was working, she wasgrinding, she was she had
(11:21):
changed careers, she became acourt reporter, and she had to
work to provide for us, to toget us out of poverty, to get us
out of the life that we werestuck in.
Um, and you know, praise God forher uh diligence and her hard
work.
And yeah, I mean she she set agood example in that regard, but
(11:45):
it it did my friend endearinglyuh called me the latchkey
because that's what I was.
I was a latchkey kid.
I could kind of come and go as Ipleased, and you know, I would
yeah, started sneaking out, andjust um obviously that just
leads to trouble when you're ayoung man with um no real good
(12:08):
set of boundaries around you.
And um so from there I wasdescending further and further
into my chaos and destruction.
And my mom with a stroke ofgenius decided to again, this
just shows the foolishness ofadolescence that um she told me
(12:33):
that she just wanted to see if Icould pass the test to get into
uh a charter school here inWilmington.
And I had every intention ofgoing to Dickinson to follow my
friends, my group of friends.
Um and so because I had herassurances that I wasn't going
(12:55):
to have to go there, she justwanted to see how well I would
do.
I I did my best.
And you know, I was not a greatstudent, but I feel like the
Lord had had gifted me um withjust uh I was naturally science
and math gifted.
And so I took the test.
(13:15):
And if you know anything aboutWilmington Charter, it's a math
and science school, and so ofcourse I did well and passed,
and they accepted me.
And then she uh pulled the rugon you.
SPEAKER_01 (13:31):
Now you gotta go.
SPEAKER_00 (13:31):
Yeah, she pulled the rug on me, she pulled the wool
over my eyes, and I, you know, Iwas 14 years old.
What could I say?
And so I ended up going there.
But that really you said astroke of genius, though, you
know, kind of yeah, and becauseotherwise you wouldn't have
gone, right?
I wouldn't have gone, and Iwould have followed my friends,
and I would have been involvedin the same nonsense.
(13:51):
Um, but it it did uh it changedthe course for me.
It it brought me to a newstandard.
You know, there were the samethings didn't work that used to
work in the public school.
And people didn't react to methe way that they used to react
in the public school.
I wasn't the cool guy who wasrebellious and edgy.
(14:13):
And no, I was like, why aren'tyou taking this more seriously?
Like, we're all here to toperform well, to do well, and it
just it was a totally differentenvironment for me.
And it kind of snapped me out ofwhat I had always placed value
in, which was you know, powerand all the things that culture
(14:35):
told us were the things.
And so, yeah, going there, um,of course, things changed
substantially for me.
Um, still pursuing the things ofthe world, but in 10th grade, I
can remember it clear as day,uh, world history class.
(14:56):
There's this new girl who showsup and she's from Florida, she
just moved back to Delaware, andshe caught my eye.
And um, yeah, but again, I comefrom uh not having many good
examples of successfulrelationships, and so um I had
(15:17):
relationships throughout theyears, middle school, high
school, and they all, as youwould expect, failed.
Uh but then junior year, goinginto senior year, the same girl,
we began hanging out, same groupof friends, and um we uh there
was just something about her.
(15:38):
It was like my heart was justdrawn to her.
And as you know and many know,that's now my wife, Brittany.
Um, but we began dating junioryear, going into senior year,
and it it radically changed mylife then.
The Lord really used her to pullme away from all those things
(15:59):
that I had been pursuing, and Ihad found something better.
I'd found something that Idesired for more than all those
things, more than drugs, morethan drinking, more than
anything else in the world.
I wanted Brittany.
And I knew that she was a goodgirl, she was responsible, she
she she set that bar high, and II knew I had to meet the bar.
(16:20):
And so I I gave up all that andI pursued after her.
Now the danger of that beingthat she just replaced my old
idols and became the new idol.
And so, but you know, the Lordis kind and he's faithful, and
he used that to begin to reformmy heart.
And she was a Christian, and soher and my mom got along great.
(16:44):
I mean, we really she would comeover constantly.
Her family uh was uh naturallyskeptical of me, um, which is
good.
Had a reputation kind of deal.
Fortunately, they didn't knowtoo much about my reputation.
I've since been able to sharewith Tony, her dad, and her mom,
uh what kind of many that wasgood.
(17:07):
Yeah.
But yeah, I we dated andgraduated together, and she went
on to school.
I went to school, uh, but we hadfour years together, and we had
plans of being married, andyeah, just going on.
I was going to court reportingschool, follow in the the steps
of my mom, and um Brittany wasgoing to nursing school, and
(17:31):
just over those years mybrokenness began to uh reveal
itself.
And I I can look back now and Ican see how the Lord was uh
exposing me and and showing memy idolatry, showing me my sin.
But it really I I was throwninto confusion.
(17:53):
I didn't know what I desiredfor.
And so naturally, when uh one ismalcontent, discontent, I began
to blame everything else but me.
And so I began to turn onBritney and say that my problems
were her and you're not doingthis, you're not this.
And so I began to doubt.
(18:17):
And I, you know, at that timearound around the time I
graduated, I really kind of lostcontact with my dad.
Uh we barely spoke, and so I Ican remember telling Britney,
like, I don't know, I just Ijust need some time, I need to
figure things out with my dad.
(18:38):
I I had been filled with angerum in that time and just growing
in that resentment, and it justwasn't healthy, I wasn't in a
good place, and um so from thereIt's always kind of interesting
how things start to weave, youknow.
SPEAKER_01 (18:56):
You kind of say their relationship with your dad
affecting your relationship withBrittany, you know, how you're
rebellious, you start to see,you know, all these the tapestry
coming together.
So it sounds like some of that'skind of coming to a head.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (19:11):
I'm early 20s, I'm just graduating, and like you
said, everything's coming to ahead.
Uh my mind is swirling withconfusion, not knowing what to
do, what I'm going to do.
Um, and I made the terribledecision to break up with
Britney.
That seemed like the mostnatural enemy of my joy at that
(19:34):
time, which now I look back andoh how it grieves me that I
missed out on that time.
Um, but I just I was a fool andI didn't know what to do.
And so I broke up with her andquickly realized my mistake.
It was, I don't even think, twoweeks before I was begging her
(19:55):
to get back together.
SPEAKER_03 (19:56):
Give me back.
SPEAKER_00 (19:59):
And and she, you know, gave it a go for a few
days, but there was justsomething in her.
She said, It's just broken.
And, you know, it's interestingbecause in in that time, you
know, my mom was obviouslydeeply invested in us.
That was something my mom alwaysdid wonderfully was investing in
(20:20):
my friends, investing inBritney.
And, you know, Brittany had toldher that she felt as though I
was the one she was supposed tomarry.
Like she felt it confirmed bythe Lord that I was the one she
was to marry.
And so I can remember theconversation again, one of those
core memories where we're in aroom and she says, My mom says
(20:43):
to Britney, like, what aboutthis?
You told me this.
And Britney just said, I don'tknow.
I can't explain it, but all Ican say is the Lord's telling me
not right now.
And yeah, that was hard, but itit it was the exact thing
according to the Lord'sprovidence and his wisdom that I
(21:05):
needed at that time.
You know, I always struggledwith rejection, and the Lord was
using yet again the person thatI loved most to wound me with
that rejection, but ultimatelyto lead to that redemption, that
uh that one who never willreject me.
And so sadly, I wish I could saythat I immediately turned to the
(21:29):
Lord and began following afterhim, but losing Brittany, like I
said, it exposed all of the darkparts of me.
I ran right back to everythingthat I had turned to before for
comfort, for value.
So back to drinking, back todrugs, back to going out, all
those things.
(21:50):
And I continued in that way fora couple years.
And it was just a a spiral ofdestruction.
Again, drinking more, drinkingmore, and I can say that it was
really in kind of the lowestpoint of my life where finally I
(22:13):
came to the end of myself, and Ican't remember one specific
thing, one specific day, uh, butit was just over a period of
time where the Lord had beendrawing my heart.
I could feel God wooing me,drawing me, calling me, and I
hadn't been seeking him.
(22:34):
Um, I had been in the church for12 years at that point.
I was about 23.
I had heard the gospel presentedcountless times.
I don't even know how manytimes.
But there was just a few thingsthat happened.
It happened honestly throughlistening to music and through
(22:56):
the Lord allowing me to hearcertain sermons by pastors and
presenting the truth of thegospel, and all of a sudden I
just I had ears to hear.
It felt like Damascus Roadmoment where the Lord opened my
eyes, and for the first time Ihad seen glory, and it was just
(23:21):
undeniable.
It was something that could onlybe a work of the Lord.
Um and so from that moment, mydesires, again, the same way
that my desires radicallychanged when I went from that
old lifestyle to Brittany, theyradically changed in a more
beautiful, eternal way fromworldly things to eternal things
(23:45):
to godly things, and my heartwas just completely enraptured
by God.
Um I began immediately to justdevour the Bible.
I couldn't get enough of theword.
I couldn't get enough ofsermons.
I listened to sermonsconstantly.
You know, the Lord used peoplelike Tim Keller, John Piper, uh
(24:07):
Vodhi Baccom, all these peopleto begin to speak wisdom to me,
to speak fatherly care andadvice to me, to speak godly
things to me.
And I'm so grateful for thattime.
Um and yeah, everythingradically changed.
It really did.
SPEAKER_01 (24:27):
I think great example.
I'd usually meet us.
Sometimes you used exactly whatI think of her.
You got to get to the end ofyourself, yeah, of either
chasing worldly things or yourown works.
You know, it's a Tim Kellerthing.
Sometimes you got to repent ofyour righteousness.
Yeah.
Some people are in that boat, orsome people, you know, your
case, you know, just at the endof all of the worldly, sinful,
(24:48):
you know, chasing all of thosethings that we'll never fulfill.
Right.
So it's great, you know, Godmeets us.
And it can be a tough prayer,you know, if you got somebody
who isn't saved and it's kind ofwhere you are to pray God bring
them to their knees, right?
You know, it's where we got toget to of on our knees before
the Father.
So such a beautiful time.
And like you say, sometimes ittakes time.
(25:09):
You know, what's many people,it's great, but I think even
when you do have that kind ofmoment, you finally give in.
There was a lead up to that.
You know, for me, I remembervery clearly just my story, you
can go back and hear it.
But yeah, I wrestled, you know,for a couple months.
You know, it took a little whilefor God to really take me down
and you know, pin me down tolike, all right, Lord, you know,
like give in, right?
(25:30):
So same thing for you, it soundslike kind of getting to that
point and turning your lifearound.
SPEAKER_00 (25:34):
So yeah, and it was really, I just began to take
notice that the things that Ikept running back to, they never
satisfied me.
I would they would satisfy mefor a moment, a brief moment, is
a vapor, right?
And and like Solomon says inEcclesiastes, I denied myself
(25:55):
nothing.
I pursued after everything insearching for fulfillment,
searching for lastingsatisfaction, and none of it
could deliver.
It was all broken wells.
I was looking for water in allthe wrong places, and so it's
like you finally get that firstdrink and it and it's something
(26:17):
like you've never had before.
And so yeah, I I I it justchanged everything.
And so, of course, at this pointI'd already broken things with
Brittany, but now I I had foundmy contentment in the Lord.
(26:37):
I had no guarantees of arelationship with Brittany.
Um I it wasn't even on my radar,to be honest.
I had purposely avoided her foryears because it just it wounded
me, it hurt.
Um and so but the Lord in hiskindness abundantly more than we
could ever ask or see.
(26:58):
You had a plan, you know.
Had a plan.
And you know, it it really trulyis crazy to think back to the
the orchestration of his divinehand and just providentially
bringing about all these things.
But you know, I had begunworking, I was pursuing.
SPEAKER_01 (27:24):
Yeah.
So you just kind of have to walkthe walk at that point and
working through that.
SPEAKER_00 (27:29):
Yeah, and and and realizing the the seriousness of
putting to death my sin.
You know, that was, I would say,the the early chapter of my
Christian walk is theseriousness that my sin is
breaking everything around me.
And it it if for anything to bewhole, to be healed, I need to
put this to death.
(27:49):
And I knew that I couldn't do itin my own strength.
Um, and uh thankfully, you know,Romans 8, where it says, if by
the Spirit you put to death themisdeeds of the body, you will
live.
I held fast to that.
I I rehearsed that verse in mymind day in and day out because
I wanted my sin to be put todeath.
(28:10):
Um, just seeing the the uglinessof sin, not only in my life, but
in my family's life andsurrounding me.
You know, we come from, like Isaid, a long line of brokenness.
And uh just to see thedestruction that sin had wrought
in people's lives, I knew howdangerous it could be to me
going forward.
(28:30):
And I knew that I was mygreatest enemy at that moment,
and I needed to put it to death,and I needed Christ to live and
reign in my heart.
And so again, fast forward to umI was about 25 and uh a couple
years kind of working throughthat, changing, putting that
(28:51):
process.
SPEAKER_01 (28:52):
It's as much as we wanted to be instantaneous,
right?
I'm sure there were stillstruggles and some ups and downs
along the way.
SPEAKER_00 (29:00):
Yeah, and I was somebody who struggled greatly
with addiction to uh drugs,addiction to pornography, you
know, that began at at a youngage.
I was nine the first time I wasreally exposed regularly to
pornography, and it didn't stop.
It was a a dragon to slay in mylife, and it took over 20 years
(29:22):
to finally the Lord put it todeath for me, you know.
Um, and and so that was abattle.
And the desire to smoke anddrink, I still, even after I got
saved, I still there was a partof me that when the occasion was
right and I was put in familiarenvironments, you know, I I
(29:43):
sadly would cave because but itwas in those moments as I began
to return to my vomit, likescriptures say, I realized how
much I hated it.
I would return to it and Iwould.
Despise myself.
And I just had a moment where Iwas wrestling, and I just asked
(30:08):
myself, like, is Christ notenough?
Because the way that you'reacting, you're acting as if he's
not enough.
And it became a lot easier tofight from that moment forward
because I don't want to believethat lie anymore.
I wanted to believe the truththat he is all sufficient.
SPEAKER_01 (30:31):
And so God kind of forces you to realize you're not
going to do this on your own.
You're still weak, and those arethe times you really have to
obviously repent, you know, samething, going through idolatry
and thoughts and you knowsimilar struggles and yeah,
pornography, some stages andwork idolatry.
It just takes different forms,right?
(30:52):
You know, it's all the same.
But you get in those situationsand you're like, oh yeah, if I
don't lean on the Lord, I knowwhat's going to happen.
So you just have to continuallydevelop that dependence.
Tell me, you know, if that kindof characterizes that for you as
well.
SPEAKER_00 (31:06):
But yeah.
Absolutely.
I I I was someone who looked atscripture and looked at you know
the life of the most righteousmen.
You look at the life of Davidand how he could fall into such
grievous sin.
And so, you know, I reallybelieved that all sin needs is
an opportunity.
And so I knew that my littlesin, how I would compare myself
(31:28):
to others, my little sin, ifjust given the right
opportunity, would go to theutter extreme.
And so that really I feared theLord and I wanted to honor him
in everything.
And so it, yeah, I'm so gratefulfor that.
The Lord gave me a seriousnessabout fighting against my sin as
being, you know, my primary goalin this life to bring him glory
(31:51):
and to put to death my sin andto walk in humility with the
Lord.
And so that kind ofcharacterized my early walk.
Was it just a battle of uhredemption and believing the
promises of God, holding fast tothe promises of God, and letting
the word just kind of wash overme and to renew me and to
(32:14):
cleanse me from all myunrighteousness.
And and then the Lord in hiskindness uh just like I said
abundantly blessed me.
And one day I was just atChristiana Mall walking through,
just expecting to get lunchafter a job, and I see Brittany.
And it's like 10th grade, uh, orwhat'd you say, civics all over
(32:37):
again?
Yeah, world history.
World history.
It was, it was like that allover again where there's just
like I don't know if there was alight shining on her, like
Mark's story with Tammy, butthat's in my mind, there was
that light.
And you know, I I went right upto her and began, struck up a
conversation, catching up.
Hey, how are you?
It's so good to see you.
(32:58):
Um, she had dated somebody inthe interim, and I knew at that
point that they had broken up,so I knew she was uh single at
the time, and I saw her and Iwas just like, it it this is
divine.
This is uh planned by the Lord,this is an appointment.
(33:18):
I yeah, I saw it as uh a Godordained work, and so I went up
to her and you know, I said, I'mgonna go get my food.
Um she was with a friend, andwhen I went and got my food, I
came back, they weren't there.
And so, you know, we got our Igot my first cell phone with
(33:39):
Brittany when we were in highschool, and so our numbers were
only two numbers off.
It was the last two numbers thatwere different, and it was a 722
number, which is more rare in inDelaware.
And so I ended up obviously Istill knew her number, so I text
her, and yeah, she gave me thewho dis and she said, Who is
(34:04):
this?
And you know, I decided I'llplay along.
That's fine.
And I just said it's Cody, andyeah, so that began us talking
again and rekindling um you knowthe love that we had.
And so to go from there, um wejust I I knew what I wanted at
(34:25):
that point.
I I had been blessed with enoughgodly counsel on you know what
marriage is, what it is not.
Um, and I knew that I wanted tomarry her.
And so I began to pursue fast.
We got engaged, we got marriedwithin a couple years.
(34:47):
Um you probably know me now inthe LIA ministry.
If if I only knew what I knewnow, I would have married her
the day I saw her.
But um, yeah, it's it it was uhsuch a blessing of the Lord
because now I felt as though Icould finally rightly appreciate
this great gift that I did.
SPEAKER_01 (35:06):
Going through what you went through, now you
probably appreciate it more thanyou may have, you knowing what
you know now, but might not bethe same blessing that it is
today.
Yeah.
How God works those things outwhere his timing's perfect, so
we do truly appreciate it, Iwould say.
SPEAKER_00 (35:22):
Yeah, and recognizing that it was
incredibly unfair of me to putso much pressure on her to be my
God.
Um, and and now, you know, beinginstructed by the word that that
could never be.
There's no way that she couldfill what only God can fill.
And so now I was able to loveher more freely, and she was
(35:46):
more free to, you know, goforward in life with me.
And, you know, we're bothsinners in need of grace, being
sanctified by the spirit, and Ijust had this great appreciation
for uh God's design of marriage,and I knew I wanted to live that
(36:07):
life with Britney.
I wanted to love her like Christhad loved me, and I wanted to
wash her with the water of theword, and it yeah, so we went
forward from there.
SPEAKER_01 (36:19):
So now we're married, you know, faith.
So talk about maybe kind ofcoming to Lifehouse, just kind
of maybe your church, you know,journey in terms of obviously
you're an elder now, which meansa lot of things.
We can go to Timothy and Titusand what that luck looks like.
And I think your story a greatexample of you know, God redeems
to bring us to that.
But maybe kind of talk a littlebit about how that worked out
(36:41):
and how you guys have walkedthat together and you've kind of
seen that work in your life aswell.
SPEAKER_00 (36:46):
Yeah, so it was kind of around the time that we got
together, got married, and I hadbeen serving in the youth at my
old church.
I had a heart for the youth, youknow, being a young man who
didn't have much direction,didn't have um a lot of male
role models to look to, itbecame a great desire of mine to
(37:11):
try and fill that void and to bepresent in the lives of the
youth and to show them like Ilove you, I care for you, but
beyond me, look through me tosee that there's a God who loves
you and is caring for you.
And um so my old church had kindof struggled to have uh a steady
(37:32):
youth pastor.
They had gone kind of from oneto the next and they had to
leave for just their ownparticular reasons, and so they
wanted to implement a newprogram, and so that gave me an
opportunity um as a young26-year-old, 27, I can't
remember how old, to kind ofserve the church in a new way.
(37:54):
And so I I was not a youthpastor or anything, but I
implemented a new uh youthprogram at the church, and I
really loved that experience,you know, getting to walk
alongside the pastors and to doministry in a different kind of
way.
And um, but you know, in in thatprocess, uh being closer to the
(38:18):
pastors and seeing kind of thethe workings behind the scenes,
and uh I began to realize thatlike we don't always align on
things and our perspective ofthings, and and there were some
really key things to me, someimportant things.
And so in discussing withBrittany and um just discussing
(38:41):
with leadership, it just feltlike it was the right time for
us to move on from there.
Um just theological differencesand kind of just directional
differences of where I believedthe church ought to be going and
where they desired for it to go.
SPEAKER_01 (39:00):
And that's in the Bible too, all the Barnabas
split ways.
Sometimes God uses those not topunish where it's anything wrong
per se, but yeah, moving youguys in a different direction
over those kind of things.
SPEAKER_00 (39:14):
Yeah, and I was so appreciative.
Yeah, I was so appreciative thatum, you know, it ended well.
You know, I I love my oldpastors, and uh we still keep in
touch with the associate pastorthere every once in a while, and
it truly was such a blessing tome and Brittany early in in my
(39:36):
walk, in our walk together as amarried couple, and and
obviously now knowing that theLord used again that thing the
same way he used Paul andBarnabas splitting to you know
spread the gospel further, um wesee it now as uh you know the
Lord bringing us ultimately hereand raising us up and uh again
(39:58):
just a f another step in takingus from one degree of glory to
the next, training us inrighteousness.
And so we actually began thesearch for a new church at that
time, and we were we actuallycame here to Lifehouse when it
was at EMMS, Everett Meredith.
And I remember thinking that theworship was great, and I just
(40:22):
felt like the pastor was yellingat me the whole time.
And you know, now that'ssomething about Mark that I just
so dearly cherish is his passionfor the gospel, passion for the
church, passion for the people.
Um, but you know, I think it wasjust it was so different from my
(40:42):
old uh, I can't remember if he'sfrom Alabama or North Carolina,
but just southern, like, yeah, avery different uh vibe.
And and so we tried it once, andthen we ended up actually going
to a church in Wilmington, andwe loved it.
Um it was uh it was great.
(41:05):
Uh they met at uh UrsulineAcademy on Sundays, and but we
lived in Middletown, and so Ithink at this point we had Rowan
and just as a young familytrying to get up to Wilmington
on time.
It we did it enough times andlearned that it wasn't going to
happen enough times that we werelike it kind of changed my
(41:26):
heart.
It really gave me a desire tohave a local church.
I want my church to be near me.
Um, and so we sadly, I mean, wewere grieved to leave that
church because we really lovedit.
We loved the pastor, we lovedthe people, but it just felt
like we were dishonoring theLord and the body by not being
(41:50):
intimately connected.
Uh, because of course to do lifetogether, it's difficult when
you're a half hour away.
I know in some states that'snothing, but in Delaware, that's
a that's like an eternity away.
SPEAKER_01 (42:02):
Yep.
But hard to be involved outsideof Sundays when it's so far, and
now you have kids, and so yeah,yeah, we had a similar
experience where we were like anhour away.
It's like, okay, we could dothat on a Sunday, but you're not
doing that on a weeknight.
Yeah.
It just makes it hard.
And that's I think God calls usto closer community impact,
those kind of things.
SPEAKER_00 (42:21):
Yeah.
And so uh again, I think theLord just used that to further
grow my love for the localchurch and it truly being, like
you said, local, and where youcan do more than just Sundays.
Um, because sure, we could doSundays, and even if we're a few
minutes late, but it's reallyjust doing life together with
those that are your true family,the family of God.
(42:44):
And so, yeah, we ended up inthat time.
My brother-in-law and my sisterended up coming to Lifehouse.
Um, and they were like, listen,you've just got to come back and
do it again.
And I came that second time, andboth me and Brittany just knew.
(43:04):
I mean, it just it just feltlike home.
I know here's a second time withBritney, you know.
SPEAKER_01 (43:09):
This needs to be a theme.
I'm seeing a theme here in theCody's office.
SPEAKER_00 (43:13):
So again, I'll blame it on my own brokenness.
But yeah, there's that theme ofuh the second time.
And so we came back and we justknew.
Uh, I mean, just to hear Mark'sheart to just how intentional he
was to get to know us.
Um, I remember early on I gotcoffee with him, and you know,
(43:35):
that was uh another one of thosepivotal moments in my life.
I can just remember sittingthere with him and just hearing
just his heart and uh just howinterested he was in me.
Again, it was such a beautifulreflection of God's fatherly
love and his intentional love.
(43:56):
And again, it was something thatmy own heart had yearned for.
Like I wanted that kind ofrelationship.
And so for Mark to really sitwith me and to give me his time
and to be so accessible, it ithealed a lot of things in me.
And I remember in thatconversation, he just said to
(44:17):
me, you know, I see you being apastor one day.
And, you know, my experiencepreviously, in my previous
church, I would say that I hadthat desire.
I felt like I'm saved, I lovethe Lord, I love to serve the
church.
Why shouldn't I be a pastor?
But then going through thatexperience, I felt like the Lord
(44:39):
was kind of telling me, not yet,don't pursue this on your own,
according to your own strength,according to your own wisdom,
but to wait on the Lord.
And and I was content in that.
And so I thought, you know, Iappreciate that, Mark.
I I don't know what the Lord hasfor me.
(45:01):
Um, but if he ever called me, II would answer the call.
Um, and so yeah, that kind ofbrings us into that transition
period where, you know, we gotreally invested in Lifehouse
again, wanting to serve theyouth.
We we began working at uh LSMand serving alongside some great
(45:25):
people and just building thoserelationships.
And from there we began torecognize a need for a something
after LSM.
You know, so often churches justbecause they don't have the
resources, maybe, or uh theyhave a different expectation
that their young adults are justgoing to get connected into
(45:46):
adult ministries at that point,but we just felt like it would
be beneficial to have a a trueyoung adult ministry, something
that's kind of that bridgebetween graduating high school
and beginning a family.
And so we piloted the youngadult ministry here uh alongside
(46:10):
the bullers actually first, andthen Manny and Nora came along
not too long after that, andyeah, they were such a blessing
uh to really growing that andand taking that and and running
with it.
And um obviously now it's a uh abeautiful ministry, thriving
(46:31):
ministry here in the church, andso we've been serving in that
for we've been at Lifehouse forseven years now, and uh we've
been doing that for six of thoseseven years, and it's been just
the most incredible blessing.
Um and so yeah, I don't know ifI'll kick it back to you at that
(46:53):
point.
SPEAKER_01 (46:53):
I think that just seeing God work and then through
marriage, I know you've a heartfor marriage, just laying out
your story of God redeeming yourrelationship, and then yeah,
that's a great story just inchurch, how God moves us into
the places and for purposes, youknow, having that heart and then
getting into young adultministry.
So yeah, I know as we get oldertoo, right?
Our stories take so long totell.
(47:15):
Anything else, you know.
So obviously we've covered a lotof church, faith, your
relationship and marriage,anything else on the family
front you'd share just from yourstory and kind of seeing coming
from a blended family, you know,I do as well, but anyways, you
know, just in your story thatthat we talked about, God
weaves, you know, some of thosethings together that you think
are important, you know, for thelife talk family to know about.
SPEAKER_00 (47:39):
Yeah, I something that's really uh something that
for Brittany and I uh reallygrew our faith and our trust and
love for the Lord is you know,after we had Rowan, you know,
first try, uh, and here comesthis beautiful little baby boy.
(48:00):
And so we just thought, oh,well, this was great.
This was the easiest pregnancy.
Um, but then after that, youknow, uh, we suffered three
miscarriages uh back to back toback after that, and not really
given any answers why by thedoctors, you know, did all the
tests, and um that taught us alot.
(48:24):
Um, it really grew our love forone another, walking in
suffering together, and youknow, just the the difference of
walking through the first oneand to the second one, and the
way that it really knit me andBritney's hearts together.
Um and so, you know, beinginstructed by again the word and
(48:45):
stories like Job, where youknow, Job suffers greatly, and
um he says, the Lord gives andthe Lord is taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.
And you know, we had thatwritten on the wall in our house
for so long just to meditate onthat truth.
And um we believed it.
(49:05):
We knew that the Lord can do allthings, and and yet he has
invited us into this suffering,and we wanted to honor him in
that, and that wasn't always soeasy.
Uh, you know, I can say that thedifference from that first
miscarriage and the way that wekind of dealt with it
internally.
(49:26):
Again, I'm a compartmentalizer,so it's easy for me to just kind
of shove my feelings down, butthat wasn't being emotionally
vulnerable and open andsensitive to what was happening
in Britney's own heart.
And again, she's someone who isso unbelievably strong.
(49:46):
I have witnessed her strength inso many ways in our lives
together, and and so she kind ofwore that on her own for a
little while.
And because I was so naive, Iguess, um, I just I wouldn't say
that I was uh as intimatelyinvolved as I should have been
(50:09):
in helping to heal that wound.
Um but then the Lord in hiskindness continued and um
sanctifying us, growing us, uhkeeping our hearts one.
And um I can say that trulygoing through suffering has
brought us closer together.
(50:30):
I know it's such a naturaltemptation, uh, just because of
the pride of suffering, to goand uh ex uh exile yourself in a
sense.
SPEAKER_01 (50:42):
And a lot of times it's they'll either bring you
together or they'll split youapart.
You know, there's kind of nomiddle ground where you lean
into the Lord together or goyour separate ways a lot of
times, especially three, likeyou said, could really put a lot
of strain, you know, on amarriage.
SPEAKER_00 (50:59):
Yeah, and and what it does is it makes you think
like, well, no one knows whatI'm going through.
No one understands my suffering,and that's really just a
prideful expression of grief.
Um, and so we definitelystruggled with that and um
isolated ourselves, but it wasthrough that and just seeing
(51:20):
friends, family coming aroundus, and uh just again sitting
with us in grief and justhelping to encourage and turn
our eyes upon the Lord.
Um, you know, it it really gaveus such an appreciation for the
church.
And so, yeah, going forwardafter that we had uh our other
(51:44):
two sons, Canon and Shepard, um,back to back uh 2018 and 2019.
And then after that, I'msomebody who always said I
wanted a hundred kids.
Um I just I just love, I believethe word when it says that
children are a blessing and aheritage from the Lord, and like
(52:05):
blesses the man whose quiversfull of them.
And so I was like, Lord, as manyas you'll give me, I'll take
them.
And um, I wanted all the babies.
And and then after that, afterShepard, we had two more losses.
And, you know, it begins at thatpoint to wear on Brittany, you
know, she's been pregnant uhseven times at that point, eight
(52:30):
times at that point.
And yeah, her body, you know, itramps up, ready for what it
knows what to do, and then yeah,to to to experience loss and
then to go through that.
It it's uh it takes a toll uhphysically, emotionally, and yet
(52:50):
I'm just so grateful thatspiritually she her trust and
love for the Lord is justimmovable.
And he really had beenstrengthening us um through
these experiences of suffering,strengthening our faith.
And I think that in his wisdom,in his foreknowledge, he was
(53:14):
preparing us for what was gonnacome next, which um we ended up
getting pregnant again.
And uh we usually had lossesearly on.
Um and this one had gotten pastthe point of all of our losses,
(53:35):
and so that hope rises, andwe're so excited, we're so
grateful, just knowing what agift it is.
And we ended up going to ouranatomy scan, and I can remember
again one of those key momentsin life.
I can picture every detail ofthe day, and we can sense
(54:00):
Britney, of course, being muchsmarter than I am, can sense it
first, but sense that there issomething off about the way that
the ultrasound tech isresponding.
Um, you know, she was just quietto me.
But Britney, of course, hadpicked up on just subtle cues
and could tell something wasoff.
(54:20):
And of course, they're notallowed to tell you that
something's wrong becausethey're not doctors and legally
they're not allowed.
And so, you know, of course, sheindicated enough that we needed
to follow up with maternal fetalmedicine that day.
And so I can remember we go homeand we know something's off.
(54:43):
Um turns out, uh, you know, wego to the appointment later that
day, we receive the diagnosis umthat our little boy has
enencephaly, which if you knowanything about it, it's kind of
akin to spina bifida, whereasexcept when the spine doesn't
develop as it should, this iskind of the opposite side where
(55:03):
the brain doesn't develop as itshould.
And, you know, of course, in inthe medical field, in a secular
environment, what's what's theoption that's presented to you
is to terminate.
Don't walk through this.
We can just take care of thisnow.
There's no chance that he willlive.
Um, and you know, thosepressures were great upon us.
(55:28):
And yet there was just somethingin our spirit, and we just knew
that that is not right, thatthis was a life given to us by
the Lord.
And uh, I just am so gratefulfor Brittany's faith and again
her strength, her endurance,perseverance to be able to carry
him all the way.
(55:49):
And so, yeah, we we deliveredhim, and um I say we, but she
did the hardest.
So it's the the guys, right?
SPEAKER_01 (55:59):
We we did the uh I watch, you know, yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (56:03):
And and you know, we got two beautiful hours with
him, and uh we always say it wasprobably the most difficult day
of our lives, but but it wasalso the most perfect day of our
lives, just to see the workingsof the Lord in incredibly
(56:24):
evident ways, you know, just somany different things.
Um that would be a whole hour initself if I got into that, but
just yeah, the kindness of theLord um was so evident, and just
how that changes things, right?
Like to experience loss in thatkind of way, my heart is deeply
(56:45):
burdened for those who losechildren.
And but, you know, I got to gohome that day, and um we
actually got to go home thatsame day, and the next morning
to to wake up to my boys.
(57:07):
You know, life takes on adifferent color after something
like that, and it just made lifetogether, both with Britney,
with my boys, with the church,more vibrant.
That God has endured everythingfor our sake.
(57:31):
He endured great loss,suffering, betrayal, loneliness,
hunger, sweating to the point ofdrops of blood coming out, and
he did that for the joy that wasset before him.
And so that whole through thatwhole process, Brittany and I
(57:53):
just continually encouraged oneanother, supported one another,
spoke to one another about howwe just wanted to honor the Lord
in our suffering.
We did not want to sin againsthim in our suffering.
Because we know what he had donefor us, and we wanted to honor
that rightly.
And so just the beauty of seeingthe way that the church came
(58:15):
around us, and again, justanother miracle of God's
providence.
Um we have good friends who hadset up for the church to write
us letters for the 30 daysleading up to Emma, our son's uh
birth, like his due date.
(58:37):
And God and his again just greatwisdom, they set it up the day
before she went into labor.
He came 30 days early.
And so for every day for 30 daysafter we got home, we had a
letter in a mailbox full ofencouragement, full of just
(59:03):
scripture, just incredible tosee the love of Christ expressed
so wonderfully in his people.
SPEAKER_01 (59:14):
Amen.
And I think yeah, that's how Godcreates us to walk together in
community, and yeah, so thankfulfor you sharing that.
I know that's hard what you guyswalk through, but hopefully also
encouraging the decision youguys made.
I know it was always anencouragement to us that, like
you said, the world's tellingyou to go the other way, to just
(59:35):
take the easy route rather thanthe faithful.
Exactly.
And I think, like you said, withJob as the great example in all
this, Job didn't sin.
He continued to trust.
The Lord gives, the Lord takesthe way, but we'll learn
something from this.
And I think I remember storiesof like the medical staff being,
you know, wowed by why wouldthis couple do this?
(59:56):
I need to look into this.
So if God uses that to help.
Other people know our Savior,how amazing that is.
And hopefully, as we've recordedthis, you know, if you're out
there, you've walked throughthat.
I think you said earlier, youknow, Satan wants you to think
you're the only one.
SPEAKER_03 (01:00:11):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (01:00:12):
Whether it's drugs, addiction, uh, you know, just
your brokenness, you know,dealing with that hardship, you
know, he wants us isolated, butthat's not what we're called to
do, but yeah, called to bedifferent.
So, well, man, that's uh a lot,you know.
And hopefully for the Life Talkfamily, you get to know our
leaders that, you know, again,like we talked about at the
(01:00:33):
lead-in, we are imperfectpeople.
Uh, we're just blessed to serve.
And Cody is an elder and leaderhere.
You know, certainly, hopefully,if you see him on Sundays, you
know, reach out to him.
Hopefully, you're encouraged byhis testimony.
Um, man, he's one of thesmartest guys I know.
We talk books all the time, andI'm just like, man, I think this
guy's read 10 board ten timesmore than I have.
(01:00:53):
I gotta catch up.
But uh just blessed to hear yourstory, some of those things that
God has redeemed, and I think,like you said, his faithfulness
to all generations andthroughout our life.
You know, I think I was even asyou were talking, I was
thinking, you know, went throughJonah recently.
The word of the Lord came againto Jonah.
So, like you said, whether it'sBrittany or, you know, those
opportunities, you know, throughserving and coming back into
(01:01:17):
church in a lot of ways, youknow, yeah.
God is the God of secondchances.
SPEAKER_00 (01:01:20):
Yeah, even those little breadcrumbs of faith for
me to follow.
And yeah, just in closing, likeI can say a verse that is deeply
impacted me is just in Psalm 22where the Lord says or David
says, from from my mother'swomb, you have made me trust
you.
And I have seen that in my ownlife.
(01:01:43):
How just from a young age in myrebellious years and everything,
there was always this underlyingtrust in God.
And and when I finally get toknow him, I I mean, you know,
John 17 says, This is eternallife, that they may know you.
And and I believe that, and Ipray everyone listening would
(01:02:07):
believe that that to know God iseternal life.
It is everything that we'researching for.
Amen.
SPEAKER_01 (01:02:14):
Well, Cody, thanks so much for taking the time for
us.
Lifehouse Family.
Hope you're encouraged.
Uh, keep tuning in.
We try to share these with youperiodically just to encourage
you, remind you, whatever you'regoing through, uh, people have
been through it, and God isgreater than your circumstances.
Amen.
Cody, thanks so much, and LifeTalk family.
We'll see you next time.
(01:02:35):
Thanks for tuning in to the LifeTalk Podcast.
If this episode encouraged you,please be sure to like, comment,
subscribe, and leave a review soothers can find this content as
well.
And we'll look forward to seeingyou next Monday for another
great episode.
What's up, Life Talk family?
Welcome back to the Life TalkPodcast.
Nate coming to you today withI'd say a special guest, but we
got a repeat guest.
I have with me today, Cody Hall,Elder here at Lifehouse.
Cody, how's it going?
SPEAKER_00 (00:29):
That's right.
Yeah.
It's going well.
I'm trying to get my numbers up.
I know there's a uh secretcompetition going on of who's
been on the pod the most.
So this is number three for me.
So hopefully I'm nearing the topof the chart.
SPEAKER_01 (00:41):
That's exactly right.
You are moving up in the elderuh podcast rankings.
So we're getting another one in.
Don't say we're not looking outfor you.
SPEAKER_00 (00:48):
Yeah, I appreciate it.
SPEAKER_01 (00:50):
But we'll appreciate you taking some time for us
today for the Life Talk family.
We have journeyed through themonth of November.
Uh, we've done a number of weekson We Work, and Cody even was uh
kicking that off for us back thefirst week in November.
So encourage everybody, if youhave not listened to that
episode, please go back, checkit out, hear Cody's Heart for
(01:10):
work in our lives was really agreat opportunity to hear from
you and when you spoke uh inchurch that Sunday.
But today we are here to hearCody's story for the Life Talk
family.
Uh, one of our hearts behind theLife Talk podcast is for
Lifehouse to Know Life House.
If you come here, we want you tofeel really in touch and uh just
be open as those who lead.
(01:31):
And again, Cody serves as anelder here, helps with LYA,
young married, uh, wears a lotof hats.
Certainly he lives out that wework mentality, but we just want
to hear his story.
I'm sure it will be veryencouraging as many of us here
didn't start like we weretalking about before we jumped
on the podcast.
We didn't fall out of the wombas leaders, and God had to do a
(01:53):
lot of work in our lives.
So absolutely.
Our stories are his stories.
But yeah, as we always do, Cody,if you want to kick us off,
maybe your earliest memories,you know, of of a young, young
Cody where where it kind of allstarted in in the memory banks.
SPEAKER_00 (02:07):
Yeah, so a lot of people probably don't know this.
Um, but I was actually born inNebraska, Grand Island,
Nebraska.
And yeah, love the Huskers.
Um, and you know, it it's asmaller town, um, not one of the
smallest.
There's certainly uh manysmaller towns in Nebraska.
So I wasn't there for too long.
(02:30):
Uh due to the nature of my mom'sjob, uh, she worked for the
racetrack, and that took us allover the place.
We moved to Iowa, to Wisconsin,to Minnesota, um, and then back
to Nebraska for a time.
Um, and so in this time, uh, Iwas about between one and two,
(02:50):
about one and a half, I wouldsay.
And um, my parents had split.
Uh, they divorced, and it'ssomething that really is kind of
a key memory for me.
Um, and I think it really theLord used that memory uh in
coming to faith and in sort ofredeeming that.
(03:10):
Uh it's something that uh amemory that me and my sister
share.
It's it's an imperfect memory.
We learned later there are moredetails to it, but it was in in
our mind, it was the night thatmy dad left.
And I can remember where wewere, we were all together in
one room, and I just have uh aclear picture of that.
They have the same kind ofclear, vivid memory of that
(03:33):
night.
And you know, being one and ahalf, I know that that's not
just because um for no reason,right?
There's something about thatthat imprinted on me, uh, left
some scar tissue.
Uh and so going from there, uh,when I was about five, my mom
(03:54):
was a single mother, and shewas, you know, looking for a new
way to provide for her threeyoung kids.
She just was done with the uhtraveling circuit of the
racetrack and wanted somethingmore stable for her family.
And so uh we stayed in Nebraskafor a summer and she came out
actually here to Delaware andgot established at Delaware
(04:17):
Park.
And um in the fall, we joinedher out here.
We were moved out here.
Um, and so I began my schoolingout here, and you know, again,
my dad was far away.
He was in Nebraska for a time,he was in Arizona for a time,
and we would see him once ortwice a year.
Uh, but that was difficult uh asa young man growing up and not
(04:40):
having your dad around for allthose regular things, and I know
uh he would have loved to havebeen there for those things, but
you know, due to the brokennessof our situation, his situation,
he just wasn't there.
And uh so that created, youknow, a lot of insecurity in me
as a young man.
Um, going to events, going tosporting uh uh hobbies and and
(05:07):
and not having him there with meand seeing the other young boys
with their dads and their dadscoaching them, encouraging them.
Um, you know, I was a prettyquiet kid.
And so I wore it well.
I was able to, my I mean, mywhole family were just master
compartmentalizers, and so Ilearned that from a young age.
(05:27):
And yeah, grew up in a Catholicfamily.
Um, but I wouldn't say uh, atleast for my mom and us when we
came out here, we attended masssometimes, but it was it grew uh
fewer and far between um in ourattendance, and so it wasn't
(05:51):
really a part of our lives.
And I can remember another corememory of mine.
Uh I was seven and one of myfriends, I slept over his house,
and he asked if I could go tochurch with them.
And I remember going to thechurch, and again, I wasn't in a
a church attending family atthat time, and there was
(06:15):
something about being there.
I just felt like I wanted tostay there forever.
I just there was something aboutthe church itself that my heart
was just ignited at that moment,but then you know, went back
home and uh again, I was quiet.
I didn't really tell anyoneabout that, and so just went
(06:36):
back to normal rhythms of life.
And it wasn't until I was about11 years old when my mom began
to attend church, and she endedup actually getting saved,
believing in the Lord.
And I think because of all thethings that I had been exposed
to growing up in a non-Christianhome, um, growing up surrounded
(07:00):
by worldliness, and uh, youknow, at that age, 11 years old,
you really pre-puberty, justbeginning to get into uh
worldliness.
And um it was, I always say itwas almost a little too late for
me at that point.
So I began attending church withher, but the world had its claws
(07:23):
into me already.
And so for her, though, it was aradical change.
The Lord had captivated her andcompletely transformed her
heart, and you know that thatburdened her, that she knew that
she had been apart from the Lordfor so long and she worried that
her kids were ruined, and uh,you guys had her on the pod, you
(07:47):
got to hear her speak aboutthat, and um, and yet, you know,
the Lord was faithful and hecomforted her and gave her great
promises in his word, and sheheld fast to those things.
She really believed them and sheprayed for us constantly.
But yeah, that began my sort ofrebellious downturn around 11,
(08:10):
12 years old.
Uh, and I don't know how muchyou want to go into that.
SPEAKER_01 (08:15):
Yeah, no, I think maybe it'd be interesting too,
you know.
Of course, you see that changein your mom, but you felt, you
know, that's not where you'reat.
You kind of, because of thebrokenness of the home, you
know, how did that really playout for you?
I'm sure she took you to church,you know, kind of getting in,
but just not able to hear, noears to hear, just too much at
(08:39):
that point, or but how did yousee kind of God's faithfulness
even in in some of those toughtimes and and what you work
through then?
SPEAKER_00 (08:47):
Yeah, she she made it a rule that if you were under
her roof, you were going tochurch.
And I appreciate that nowadays.
Um at the time, of course, Ihated it.
I despised that she made me goon Wednesdays, made me go on
Sundays.
Uh and you know, the Lord was sofaithful, even in that time, to
(09:07):
put men in my life, even thoughI didn't appreciate them at that
time, but men that invested inme, even if a little bit.
Um, I think because of myexperience, um, I was naturally
skeptical of male figures.
And so I it was difficult forany of them to really penetrate
(09:29):
the walls that I had put up.
And but now I can look back andsee how I have learned so much
from them, even if I didn'tlearn it at that time.
And so I I think during thattime, yeah, I was going, but I
had no ears to hear.
I you see it all the time,right?
When we go to church and youjust see there are children who
(09:52):
are completely disinterested,and and that was me.
I was just looking to try andfall asleep when I could in
service and wait till I got anelbow in the side or something.
And yeah.
And so after a few years, I Iwas able to convince my mom that
(10:13):
I didn't need to go anymore, andI stopped going.
And um yeah, I just I began topursue all the things of the
world um from a young age.
Started sneaking out of thehouse at eleven and um just
getting into uh more and morenonsense and surrounded by a
(10:34):
company of fools, I was I sadlyI'd say the ringleader of fools.
I was, you know, what Romans 1says, where they not only sin,
but they give approval to thosethat do it.
And and that was me for sure.
I wanted to drag everyone intomy sinful little world.
And I don't know, it it was a asad time.
(10:58):
Um like I said during the highschool years, you know,
especially, or yeah, this wasleading up to high school and um
so sneaking out before highschool and getting out in the
neighborhood.
Yeah, I mean, my mom was againproviding for her for us, and so
she was working, she wasgrinding, she was she had
(11:21):
changed careers, she became acourt reporter, and she had to
work to provide for us, to toget us out of poverty, to get us
out of the life that we werestuck in.
Um, and you know, praise God forher uh diligence and her hard
work.
And yeah, I mean she she set agood example in that regard, but
(11:45):
it it did my friend endearinglyuh called me the latchkey
because that's what I was.
I was a latchkey kid.
I could kind of come and go as Ipleased, and you know, I would
yeah, started sneaking out, andjust um obviously that just
leads to trouble when you're ayoung man with um no real good
(12:08):
set of boundaries around you.
And um so from there I wasdescending further and further
into my chaos and destruction.
And my mom with a stroke ofgenius decided to again, this
just shows the foolishness ofadolescence that um she told me
(12:33):
that she just wanted to see if Icould pass the test to get into
uh a charter school here inWilmington.
And I had every intention ofgoing to Dickinson to follow my
friends, my group of friends.
Um and so because I had herassurances that I wasn't going
(12:55):
to have to go there, she justwanted to see how well I would
do.
I I did my best.
And you know, I was not a greatstudent, but I feel like the
Lord had had gifted me um withjust uh I was naturally science
and math gifted.
And so I took the test.
(13:15):
And if you know anything aboutWilmington Charter, it's a math
and science school, and so ofcourse I did well and passed,
and they accepted me.
And then she uh pulled the rugon you.
SPEAKER_01 (13:31):
Now you gotta go.
SPEAKER_00 (13:31):
Yeah, she pulled the rug on me, she pulled the wool
over my eyes, and I, you know, Iwas 14 years old.
What could I say?
And so I ended up going there.
But that really you said astroke of genius, though, you
know, kind of yeah, and becauseotherwise you wouldn't have
gone, right?
I wouldn't have gone, and Iwould have followed my friends,
and I would have been involvedin the same nonsense.
(13:51):
Um, but it it did uh it changedthe course for me.
It it brought me to a newstandard.
You know, there were the samethings didn't work that used to
work in the public school.
And people didn't react to methe way that they used to react
in the public school.
I wasn't the cool guy who wasrebellious and edgy.
(14:13):
And no, I was like, why aren'tyou taking this more seriously?
Like, we're all here to toperform well, to do well, and it
just it was a totally differentenvironment for me.
And it kind of snapped me out ofwhat I had always placed value
in, which was you know, powerand all the things that culture
(14:35):
told us were the things.
And so, yeah, going there, um,of course, things changed
substantially for me.
Um, still pursuing the things ofthe world, but in 10th grade, I
can remember it clear as day,uh, world history class.
(14:56):
There's this new girl who showsup and she's from Florida, she
just moved back to Delaware, andshe caught my eye.
And um, yeah, but again, I comefrom uh not having many good
examples of successfulrelationships, and so um I had
(15:17):
relationships throughout theyears, middle school, high
school, and they all, as youwould expect, failed.
Uh but then junior year, goinginto senior year, the same girl,
we began hanging out, same groupof friends, and um we uh there
was just something about her.
(15:38):
It was like my heart was justdrawn to her.
And as you know and many know,that's now my wife, Brittany.
Um, but we began dating junioryear, going into senior year,
and it it radically changed mylife then.
The Lord really used her to pullme away from all those things
(15:59):
that I had been pursuing, and Ihad found something better.
I'd found something that Idesired for more than all those
things, more than drugs, morethan drinking, more than
anything else in the world.
I wanted Brittany.
And I knew that she was a goodgirl, she was responsible, she
she she set that bar high, and II knew I had to meet the bar.
(16:20):
And so I I gave up all that andI pursued after her.
Now the danger of that beingthat she just replaced my old
idols and became the new idol.
And so, but you know, the Lordis kind and he's faithful, and
he used that to begin to reformmy heart.
And she was a Christian, and soher and my mom got along great.
(16:44):
I mean, we really she would comeover constantly.
Her family uh was uh naturallyskeptical of me, um, which is
good.
Had a reputation kind of deal.
Fortunately, they didn't knowtoo much about my reputation.
I've since been able to sharewith Tony, her dad, and her mom,
uh what kind of many that wasgood.
(17:07):
Yeah.
But yeah, I we dated andgraduated together, and she went
on to school.
I went to school, uh, but we hadfour years together, and we had
plans of being married, andyeah, just going on.
I was going to court reportingschool, follow in the the steps
of my mom, and um Brittany wasgoing to nursing school, and
(17:31):
just over those years mybrokenness began to uh reveal
itself.
And I I can look back now and Ican see how the Lord was uh
exposing me and and showing memy idolatry, showing me my sin.
But it really I I was throwninto confusion.
(17:53):
I didn't know what I desiredfor.
And so naturally, when uh one ismalcontent, discontent, I began
to blame everything else but me.
And so I began to turn onBritney and say that my problems
were her and you're not doingthis, you're not this.
And so I began to doubt.
(18:17):
And I, you know, at that timearound around the time I
graduated, I really kind of lostcontact with my dad.
Uh we barely spoke, and so I Ican remember telling Britney,
like, I don't know, I just Ijust need some time, I need to
figure things out with my dad.
(18:38):
I I had been filled with angerum in that time and just growing
in that resentment, and it justwasn't healthy, I wasn't in a
good place, and um so from thereIt's always kind of interesting
how things start to weave, youknow.
SPEAKER_01 (18:56):
You kind of say their relationship with your dad
affecting your relationship withBrittany, you know, how you're
rebellious, you start to see,you know, all these the tapestry
coming together.
So it sounds like some of that'skind of coming to a head.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (19:11):
I'm early 20s, I'm just graduating, and like you
said, everything's coming to ahead.
Uh my mind is swirling withconfusion, not knowing what to
do, what I'm going to do.
Um, and I made the terribledecision to break up with
Britney.
That seemed like the mostnatural enemy of my joy at that
(19:34):
time, which now I look back andoh how it grieves me that I
missed out on that time.
Um, but I just I was a fool andI didn't know what to do.
And so I broke up with her andquickly realized my mistake.
It was, I don't even think, twoweeks before I was begging her
(19:55):
to get back together.
SPEAKER_03 (19:56):
Give me back.
SPEAKER_00 (19:59):
And and she, you know, gave it a go for a few
days, but there was justsomething in her.
She said, It's just broken.
And, you know, it's interestingbecause in in that time, you
know, my mom was obviouslydeeply invested in us.
That was something my mom alwaysdid wonderfully was investing in
(20:20):
my friends, investing inBritney.
And, you know, Brittany had toldher that she felt as though I
was the one she was supposed tomarry.
Like she felt it confirmed bythe Lord that I was the one she
was to marry.
And so I can remember theconversation again, one of those
core memories where we're in aroom and she says, My mom says
(20:43):
to Britney, like, what aboutthis?
You told me this.
And Britney just said, I don'tknow.
I can't explain it, but all Ican say is the Lord's telling me
not right now.
And yeah, that was hard, but itit it was the exact thing
according to the Lord'sprovidence and his wisdom that I
(21:05):
needed at that time.
You know, I always struggledwith rejection, and the Lord was
using yet again the person thatI loved most to wound me with
that rejection, but ultimatelyto lead to that redemption, that
uh that one who never willreject me.
And so sadly, I wish I could saythat I immediately turned to the
(21:29):
Lord and began following afterhim, but losing Brittany, like I
said, it exposed all of the darkparts of me.
I ran right back to everythingthat I had turned to before for
comfort, for value.
So back to drinking, back todrugs, back to going out, all
those things.
(21:50):
And I continued in that way fora couple years.
And it was just a a spiral ofdestruction.
Again, drinking more, drinkingmore, and I can say that it was
really in kind of the lowestpoint of my life where finally I
(22:13):
came to the end of myself, and Ican't remember one specific
thing, one specific day, uh, butit was just over a period of
time where the Lord had beendrawing my heart.
I could feel God wooing me,drawing me, calling me, and I
hadn't been seeking him.
(22:34):
Um, I had been in the church for12 years at that point.
I was about 23.
I had heard the gospel presentedcountless times.
I don't even know how manytimes.
But there was just a few thingsthat happened.
It happened honestly throughlistening to music and through
(22:56):
the Lord allowing me to hearcertain sermons by pastors and
presenting the truth of thegospel, and all of a sudden I
just I had ears to hear.
It felt like Damascus Roadmoment where the Lord opened my
eyes, and for the first time Ihad seen glory, and it was just
(23:21):
undeniable.
It was something that could onlybe a work of the Lord.
Um and so from that moment, mydesires, again, the same way
that my desires radicallychanged when I went from that
old lifestyle to Brittany, theyradically changed in a more
beautiful, eternal way fromworldly things to eternal things
(23:45):
to godly things, and my heartwas just completely enraptured
by God.
Um I began immediately to justdevour the Bible.
I couldn't get enough of theword.
I couldn't get enough ofsermons.
I listened to sermonsconstantly.
You know, the Lord used peoplelike Tim Keller, John Piper, uh
(24:07):
Vodhi Baccom, all these peopleto begin to speak wisdom to me,
to speak fatherly care andadvice to me, to speak godly
things to me.
And I'm so grateful for thattime.
Um and yeah, everythingradically changed.
It really did.
SPEAKER_01 (24:27):
I think great example.
I'd usually meet us.
Sometimes you used exactly whatI think of her.
You got to get to the end ofyourself, yeah, of either
chasing worldly things or yourown works.
You know, it's a Tim Kellerthing.
Sometimes you got to repent ofyour righteousness.
Yeah.
Some people are in that boat, orsome people, you know, your
case, you know, just at the endof all of the worldly, sinful,
(24:48):
you know, chasing all of thosethings that we'll never fulfill.
Right.
So it's great, you know, Godmeets us.
And it can be a tough prayer,you know, if you got somebody
who isn't saved and it's kind ofwhere you are to pray God bring
them to their knees, right?
You know, it's where we got toget to of on our knees before
the Father.
So such a beautiful time.
And like you say, sometimes ittakes time.
(25:09):
You know, what's many people,it's great, but I think even
when you do have that kind ofmoment, you finally give in.
There was a lead up to that.
You know, for me, I remembervery clearly just my story, you
can go back and hear it.
But yeah, I wrestled, you know,for a couple months.
You know, it took a little whilefor God to really take me down
and you know, pin me down tolike, all right, Lord, you know,
like give in, right?
(25:30):
So same thing for you, it soundslike kind of getting to that
point and turning your lifearound.
SPEAKER_00 (25:34):
So yeah, and it was really, I just began to take
notice that the things that Ikept running back to, they never
satisfied me.
I would they would satisfy mefor a moment, a brief moment, is
a vapor, right?
And and like Solomon says inEcclesiastes, I denied myself
(25:55):
nothing.
I pursued after everything insearching for fulfillment,
searching for lastingsatisfaction, and none of it
could deliver.
It was all broken wells.
I was looking for water in allthe wrong places, and so it's
like you finally get that firstdrink and it and it's something
(26:17):
like you've never had before.
And so yeah, I I I it justchanged everything.
And so, of course, at this pointI'd already broken things with
Brittany, but now I I had foundmy contentment in the Lord.
(26:37):
I had no guarantees of arelationship with Brittany.
Um I it wasn't even on my radar,to be honest.
I had purposely avoided her foryears because it just it wounded
me, it hurt.
Um and so but the Lord in hiskindness abundantly more than we
could ever ask or see.
(26:58):
You had a plan, you know.
Had a plan.
And you know, it it really trulyis crazy to think back to the
the orchestration of his divinehand and just providentially
bringing about all these things.
But you know, I had begunworking, I was pursuing.
SPEAKER_01 (27:24):
Yeah.
So you just kind of have to walkthe walk at that point and
working through that.
SPEAKER_00 (27:29):
Yeah, and and and realizing the the seriousness of
putting to death my sin.
You know, that was, I would say,the the early chapter of my
Christian walk is theseriousness that my sin is
breaking everything around me.
And it it if for anything to bewhole, to be healed, I need to
put this to death.
(27:49):
And I knew that I couldn't do itin my own strength.
Um, and uh thankfully, you know,Romans 8, where it says, if by
the Spirit you put to death themisdeeds of the body, you will
live.
I held fast to that.
I I rehearsed that verse in mymind day in and day out because
I wanted my sin to be put todeath.
(28:10):
Um, just seeing the the uglinessof sin, not only in my life, but
in my family's life andsurrounding me.
You know, we come from, like Isaid, a long line of brokenness.
And uh just to see thedestruction that sin had wrought
in people's lives, I knew howdangerous it could be to me
going forward.
(28:30):
And I knew that I was mygreatest enemy at that moment,
and I needed to put it to death,and I needed Christ to live and
reign in my heart.
And so again, fast forward to umI was about 25 and uh a couple
years kind of working throughthat, changing, putting that
(28:51):
process.
SPEAKER_01 (28:52):
It's as much as we wanted to be instantaneous,
right?
I'm sure there were stillstruggles and some ups and downs
along the way.
SPEAKER_00 (29:00):
Yeah, and I was somebody who struggled greatly
with addiction to uh drugs,addiction to pornography, you
know, that began at at a youngage.
I was nine the first time I wasreally exposed regularly to
pornography, and it didn't stop.
It was a a dragon to slay in mylife, and it took over 20 years
(29:22):
to finally the Lord put it todeath for me, you know.
Um, and and so that was abattle.
And the desire to smoke anddrink, I still, even after I got
saved, I still there was a partof me that when the occasion was
right and I was put in familiarenvironments, you know, I I
(29:43):
sadly would cave because but itwas in those moments as I began
to return to my vomit, likescriptures say, I realized how
much I hated it.
I would return to it and Iwould.
Despise myself.
And I just had a moment where Iwas wrestling, and I just asked
(30:08):
myself, like, is Christ notenough?
Because the way that you'reacting, you're acting as if he's
not enough.
And it became a lot easier tofight from that moment forward
because I don't want to believethat lie anymore.
I wanted to believe the truththat he is all sufficient.
SPEAKER_01 (30:31):
And so God kind of forces you to realize you're not
going to do this on your own.
You're still weak, and those arethe times you really have to
obviously repent, you know, samething, going through idolatry
and thoughts and you knowsimilar struggles and yeah,
pornography, some stages andwork idolatry.
It just takes different forms,right?
(30:52):
You know, it's all the same.
But you get in those situationsand you're like, oh yeah, if I
don't lean on the Lord, I knowwhat's going to happen.
So you just have to continuallydevelop that dependence.
Tell me, you know, if that kindof characterizes that for you as
well.
SPEAKER_00 (31:06):
But yeah.
Absolutely.
I I I was someone who looked atscripture and looked at you know
the life of the most righteousmen.
You look at the life of Davidand how he could fall into such
grievous sin.
And so, you know, I reallybelieved that all sin needs is
an opportunity.
And so I knew that my littlesin, how I would compare myself
(31:28):
to others, my little sin, ifjust given the right
opportunity, would go to theutter extreme.
And so that really I feared theLord and I wanted to honor him
in everything.
And so it, yeah, I'm so gratefulfor that.
The Lord gave me a seriousnessabout fighting against my sin as
being, you know, my primary goalin this life to bring him glory
(31:51):
and to put to death my sin andto walk in humility with the
Lord.
And so that kind ofcharacterized my early walk.
Was it just a battle of uhredemption and believing the
promises of God, holding fast tothe promises of God, and letting
the word just kind of wash overme and to renew me and to
(32:14):
cleanse me from all myunrighteousness.
And and then the Lord in hiskindness uh just like I said
abundantly blessed me.
And one day I was just atChristiana Mall walking through,
just expecting to get lunchafter a job, and I see Brittany.
And it's like 10th grade, uh, orwhat'd you say, civics all over
(32:37):
again?
Yeah, world history.
World history.
It was, it was like that allover again where there's just
like I don't know if there was alight shining on her, like
Mark's story with Tammy, butthat's in my mind, there was
that light.
And you know, I I went right upto her and began, struck up a
conversation, catching up.
Hey, how are you?
It's so good to see you.
(32:58):
Um, she had dated somebody inthe interim, and I knew at that
point that they had broken up,so I knew she was uh single at
the time, and I saw her and Iwas just like, it it this is
divine.
This is uh planned by the Lord,this is an appointment.
(33:18):
I yeah, I saw it as uh a Godordained work, and so I went up
to her and you know, I said, I'mgonna go get my food.
Um she was with a friend, andwhen I went and got my food, I
came back, they weren't there.
And so, you know, we got our Igot my first cell phone with
(33:39):
Brittany when we were in highschool, and so our numbers were
only two numbers off.
It was the last two numbers thatwere different, and it was a 722
number, which is more rare in inDelaware.
And so I ended up obviously Istill knew her number, so I text
her, and yeah, she gave me thewho dis and she said, Who is
(34:04):
this?
And you know, I decided I'llplay along.
That's fine.
And I just said it's Cody, andyeah, so that began us talking
again and rekindling um you knowthe love that we had.
And so to go from there, um wejust I I knew what I wanted at
(34:25):
that point.
I I had been blessed with enoughgodly counsel on you know what
marriage is, what it is not.
Um, and I knew that I wanted tomarry her.
And so I began to pursue fast.
We got engaged, we got marriedwithin a couple years.
(34:47):
Um you probably know me now inthe LIA ministry.
If if I only knew what I knewnow, I would have married her
the day I saw her.
But um, yeah, it's it it was uhsuch a blessing of the Lord
because now I felt as though Icould finally rightly appreciate
this great gift that I did.
SPEAKER_01 (35:06):
Going through what you went through, now you
probably appreciate it more thanyou may have, you knowing what
you know now, but might not bethe same blessing that it is
today.
Yeah.
How God works those things outwhere his timing's perfect, so
we do truly appreciate it, Iwould say.
SPEAKER_00 (35:22):
Yeah, and recognizing that it was
incredibly unfair of me to putso much pressure on her to be my
God.
Um, and and now, you know, beinginstructed by the word that that
could never be.
There's no way that she couldfill what only God can fill.
And so now I was able to loveher more freely, and she was
(35:46):
more free to, you know, goforward in life with me.
And, you know, we're bothsinners in need of grace, being
sanctified by the spirit, and Ijust had this great appreciation
for uh God's design of marriage,and I knew I wanted to live that
(36:07):
life with Britney.
I wanted to love her like Christhad loved me, and I wanted to
wash her with the water of theword, and it yeah, so we went
forward from there.
SPEAKER_01 (36:19):
So now we're married, you know, faith.
So talk about maybe kind ofcoming to Lifehouse, just kind
of maybe your church, you know,journey in terms of obviously
you're an elder now, which meansa lot of things.
We can go to Timothy and Titusand what that luck looks like.
And I think your story a greatexample of you know, God redeems
to bring us to that.
But maybe kind of talk a littlebit about how that worked out
(36:41):
and how you guys have walkedthat together and you've kind of
seen that work in your life aswell.
SPEAKER_00 (36:46):
Yeah, so it was kind of around the time that we got
together, got married, and I hadbeen serving in the youth at my
old church.
I had a heart for the youth, youknow, being a young man who
didn't have much direction,didn't have um a lot of male
role models to look to, itbecame a great desire of mine to
(37:11):
try and fill that void and to bepresent in the lives of the
youth and to show them like Ilove you, I care for you, but
beyond me, look through me tosee that there's a God who loves
you and is caring for you.
And um so my old church had kindof struggled to have uh a steady
(37:32):
youth pastor.
They had gone kind of from oneto the next and they had to
leave for just their ownparticular reasons, and so they
wanted to implement a newprogram, and so that gave me an
opportunity um as a young26-year-old, 27, I can't
remember how old, to kind ofserve the church in a new way.
(37:54):
And so I I was not a youthpastor or anything, but I
implemented a new uh youthprogram at the church, and I
really loved that experience,you know, getting to walk
alongside the pastors and to doministry in a different kind of
way.
And um, but you know, in in thatprocess, uh being closer to the
(38:18):
pastors and seeing kind of thethe workings behind the scenes,
and uh I began to realize thatlike we don't always align on
things and our perspective ofthings, and and there were some
really key things to me, someimportant things.
And so in discussing withBrittany and um just discussing
(38:41):
with leadership, it just feltlike it was the right time for
us to move on from there.
Um just theological differencesand kind of just directional
differences of where I believedthe church ought to be going and
where they desired for it to go.
SPEAKER_01 (39:00):
And that's in the Bible too, all the Barnabas
split ways.
Sometimes God uses those not topunish where it's anything wrong
per se, but yeah, moving youguys in a different direction
over those kind of things.
SPEAKER_00 (39:14):
Yeah, and I was so appreciative.
Yeah, I was so appreciative thatum, you know, it ended well.
You know, I I love my oldpastors, and uh we still keep in
touch with the associate pastorthere every once in a while, and
it truly was such a blessing tome and Brittany early in in my
(39:36):
walk, in our walk together as amarried couple, and and
obviously now knowing that theLord used again that thing the
same way he used Paul andBarnabas splitting to you know
spread the gospel further, um wesee it now as uh you know the
Lord bringing us ultimately hereand raising us up and uh again
(39:58):
just a f another step in takingus from one degree of glory to
the next, training us inrighteousness.
And so we actually began thesearch for a new church at that
time, and we were we actuallycame here to Lifehouse when it
was at EMMS, Everett Meredith.
And I remember thinking that theworship was great, and I just
(40:22):
felt like the pastor was yellingat me the whole time.
And you know, now that'ssomething about Mark that I just
so dearly cherish is his passionfor the gospel, passion for the
church, passion for the people.
Um, but you know, I think it wasjust it was so different from my
(40:42):
old uh, I can't remember if he'sfrom Alabama or North Carolina,
but just southern, like, yeah, avery different uh vibe.
And and so we tried it once, andthen we ended up actually going
to a church in Wilmington, andwe loved it.
Um it was uh it was great.
(41:05):
Uh they met at uh UrsulineAcademy on Sundays, and but we
lived in Middletown, and so Ithink at this point we had Rowan
and just as a young familytrying to get up to Wilmington
on time.
It we did it enough times andlearned that it wasn't going to
happen enough times that we werelike it kind of changed my
(41:26):
heart.
It really gave me a desire tohave a local church.
I want my church to be near me.
Um, and so we sadly, I mean, wewere grieved to leave that
church because we really lovedit.
We loved the pastor, we lovedthe people, but it just felt
like we were dishonoring theLord and the body by not being
(41:50):
intimately connected.
Uh, because of course to do lifetogether, it's difficult when
you're a half hour away.
I know in some states that'snothing, but in Delaware, that's
a that's like an eternity away.
SPEAKER_01 (42:02):
Yep.
But hard to be involved outsideof Sundays when it's so far, and
now you have kids, and so yeah,yeah, we had a similar
experience where we were like anhour away.
It's like, okay, we could dothat on a Sunday, but you're not
doing that on a weeknight.
Yeah.
It just makes it hard.
And that's I think God calls usto closer community impact,
those kind of things.
SPEAKER_00 (42:21):
Yeah.
And so uh again, I think theLord just used that to further
grow my love for the localchurch and it truly being, like
you said, local, and where youcan do more than just Sundays.
Um, because sure, we could doSundays, and even if we're a few
minutes late, but it's reallyjust doing life together with
those that are your true family,the family of God.
(42:44):
And so, yeah, we ended up inthat time.
My brother-in-law and my sisterended up coming to Lifehouse.
Um, and they were like, listen,you've just got to come back and
do it again.
And I came that second time, andboth me and Brittany just knew.
(43:04):
I mean, it just it just feltlike home.
I know here's a second time withBritney, you know.
SPEAKER_01 (43:09):
This needs to be a theme.
I'm seeing a theme here in theCody's office.
SPEAKER_00 (43:13):
So again, I'll blame it on my own brokenness.
But yeah, there's that theme ofuh the second time.
And so we came back and we justknew.
Uh, I mean, just to hear Mark'sheart to just how intentional he
was to get to know us.
Um, I remember early on I gotcoffee with him, and you know,
(43:35):
that was uh another one of thosepivotal moments in my life.
I can just remember sittingthere with him and just hearing
just his heart and uh just howinterested he was in me.
Again, it was such a beautifulreflection of God's fatherly
love and his intentional love.
(43:56):
And again, it was something thatmy own heart had yearned for.
Like I wanted that kind ofrelationship.
And so for Mark to really sitwith me and to give me his time
and to be so accessible, it ithealed a lot of things in me.
And I remember in thatconversation, he just said to
(44:17):
me, you know, I see you being apastor one day.
And, you know, my experiencepreviously, in my previous
church, I would say that I hadthat desire.
I felt like I'm saved, I lovethe Lord, I love to serve the
church.
Why shouldn't I be a pastor?
But then going through thatexperience, I felt like the Lord
(44:39):
was kind of telling me, not yet,don't pursue this on your own,
according to your own strength,according to your own wisdom,
but to wait on the Lord.
And and I was content in that.
And so I thought, you know, Iappreciate that, Mark.
I I don't know what the Lord hasfor me.
(45:01):
Um, but if he ever called me, II would answer the call.
Um, and so yeah, that kind ofbrings us into that transition
period where, you know, we gotreally invested in Lifehouse
again, wanting to serve theyouth.
We we began working at uh LSMand serving alongside some great
(45:25):
people and just building thoserelationships.
And from there we began torecognize a need for a something
after LSM.
You know, so often churches justbecause they don't have the
resources, maybe, or uh theyhave a different expectation
that their young adults are justgoing to get connected into
(45:46):
adult ministries at that point,but we just felt like it would
be beneficial to have a a trueyoung adult ministry, something
that's kind of that bridgebetween graduating high school
and beginning a family.
And so we piloted the youngadult ministry here uh alongside
(46:10):
the bullers actually first, andthen Manny and Nora came along
not too long after that, andyeah, they were such a blessing
uh to really growing that andand taking that and and running
with it.
And um obviously now it's a uh abeautiful ministry, thriving
(46:31):
ministry here in the church, andso we've been serving in that
for we've been at Lifehouse forseven years now, and uh we've
been doing that for six of thoseseven years, and it's been just
the most incredible blessing.
Um and so yeah, I don't know ifI'll kick it back to you at that
(46:53):
point.
SPEAKER_01 (46:53):
I think that just seeing God work and then through
marriage, I know you've a heartfor marriage, just laying out
your story of God redeeming yourrelationship, and then yeah,
that's a great story just inchurch, how God moves us into
the places and for purposes, youknow, having that heart and then
getting into young adultministry.
So yeah, I know as we get oldertoo, right?
Our stories take so long totell.
(47:15):
Anything else, you know.
So obviously we've covered a lotof church, faith, your
relationship and marriage,anything else on the family
front you'd share just from yourstory and kind of seeing coming
from a blended family, you know,I do as well, but anyways, you
know, just in your story thatthat we talked about, God
weaves, you know, some of thosethings together that you think
are important, you know, for thelife talk family to know about.
SPEAKER_00 (47:39):
Yeah, I something that's really uh something that
for Brittany and I uh reallygrew our faith and our trust and
love for the Lord is you know,after we had Rowan, you know,
first try, uh, and here comesthis beautiful little baby boy.
(48:00):
And so we just thought, oh,well, this was great.
This was the easiest pregnancy.
Um, but then after that, youknow, uh, we suffered three
miscarriages uh back to back toback after that, and not really
given any answers why by thedoctors, you know, did all the
tests, and um that taught us alot.
(48:24):
Um, it really grew our love forone another, walking in
suffering together, and youknow, just the the difference of
walking through the first oneand to the second one, and the
way that it really knit me andBritney's hearts together.
Um and so, you know, beinginstructed by again the word and
(48:45):
stories like Job, where youknow, Job suffers greatly, and
um he says, the Lord gives andthe Lord is taken away.
Blessed be the name of the Lord.
And you know, we had thatwritten on the wall in our house
for so long just to meditate onthat truth.
And um we believed it.
(49:05):
We knew that the Lord can do allthings, and and yet he has
invited us into this suffering,and we wanted to honor him in
that, and that wasn't always soeasy.
Uh, you know, I can say that thedifference from that first
miscarriage and the way that wekind of dealt with it
internally.
(49:26):
Again, I'm a compartmentalizer,so it's easy for me to just kind
of shove my feelings down, butthat wasn't being emotionally
vulnerable and open andsensitive to what was happening
in Britney's own heart.
And again, she's someone who isso unbelievably strong.
(49:46):
I have witnessed her strength inso many ways in our lives
together, and and so she kind ofwore that on her own for a
little while.
And because I was so naive, Iguess, um, I just I wouldn't say
that I was uh as intimatelyinvolved as I should have been
(50:09):
in helping to heal that wound.
Um but then the Lord in hiskindness continued and um
sanctifying us, growing us, uhkeeping our hearts one.
And um I can say that trulygoing through suffering has
brought us closer together.
(50:30):
I know it's such a naturaltemptation, uh, just because of
the pride of suffering, to goand uh ex uh exile yourself in a
sense.
SPEAKER_01 (50:42):
And a lot of times it's they'll either bring you
together or they'll split youapart.
You know, there's kind of nomiddle ground where you lean
into the Lord together or goyour separate ways a lot of
times, especially three, likeyou said, could really put a lot
of strain, you know, on amarriage.
SPEAKER_00 (50:59):
Yeah, and and what it does is it makes you think
like, well, no one knows whatI'm going through.
No one understands my suffering,and that's really just a
prideful expression of grief.
Um, and so we definitelystruggled with that and um
isolated ourselves, but it wasthrough that and just seeing
(51:20):
friends, family coming aroundus, and uh just again sitting
with us in grief and justhelping to encourage and turn
our eyes upon the Lord.
Um, you know, it it really gaveus such an appreciation for the
church.
And so, yeah, going forwardafter that we had uh our other
(51:44):
two sons, Canon and Shepard, um,back to back uh 2018 and 2019.
And then after that, I'msomebody who always said I
wanted a hundred kids.
Um I just I just love, I believethe word when it says that
children are a blessing and aheritage from the Lord, and like
(52:05):
blesses the man whose quiversfull of them.
And so I was like, Lord, as manyas you'll give me, I'll take
them.
And um, I wanted all the babies.
And and then after that, afterShepard, we had two more losses.
And, you know, it begins at thatpoint to wear on Brittany, you
know, she's been pregnant uhseven times at that point, eight
(52:30):
times at that point.
And yeah, her body, you know, itramps up, ready for what it
knows what to do, and then yeah,to to to experience loss and
then to go through that.
It it's uh it takes a toll uhphysically, emotionally, and yet
(52:50):
I'm just so grateful thatspiritually she her trust and
love for the Lord is justimmovable.
And he really had beenstrengthening us um through
these experiences of suffering,strengthening our faith.
And I think that in his wisdom,in his foreknowledge, he was
(53:14):
preparing us for what was gonnacome next, which um we ended up
getting pregnant again.
And uh we usually had lossesearly on.
Um and this one had gotten pastthe point of all of our losses,
(53:35):
and so that hope rises, andwe're so excited, we're so
grateful, just knowing what agift it is.
And we ended up going to ouranatomy scan, and I can remember
again one of those key momentsin life.
I can picture every detail ofthe day, and we can sense
(54:00):
Britney, of course, being muchsmarter than I am, can sense it
first, but sense that there issomething off about the way that
the ultrasound tech isresponding.
Um, you know, she was just quietto me.
But Britney, of course, hadpicked up on just subtle cues
and could tell something wasoff.
(54:20):
And of course, they're notallowed to tell you that
something's wrong becausethey're not doctors and legally
they're not allowed.
And so, you know, of course, sheindicated enough that we needed
to follow up with maternal fetalmedicine that day.
And so I can remember we go homeand we know something's off.
(54:43):
Um turns out, uh, you know, wego to the appointment later that
day, we receive the diagnosis umthat our little boy has
enencephaly, which if you knowanything about it, it's kind of
akin to spina bifida, whereasexcept when the spine doesn't
develop as it should, this iskind of the opposite side where
(55:03):
the brain doesn't develop as itshould.
And, you know, of course, in inthe medical field, in a secular
environment, what's what's theoption that's presented to you
is to terminate.
Don't walk through this.
We can just take care of thisnow.
There's no chance that he willlive.
Um, and you know, thosepressures were great upon us.
(55:28):
And yet there was just somethingin our spirit, and we just knew
that that is not right, thatthis was a life given to us by
the Lord.
And uh, I just am so gratefulfor Brittany's faith and again
her strength, her endurance,perseverance to be able to carry
him all the way.
(55:49):
And so, yeah, we we deliveredhim, and um I say we, but she
did the hardest.
So it's the the guys, right?
SPEAKER_01 (55:59):
We we did the uh I watch, you know, yeah.
SPEAKER_00 (56:03):
And and you know, we got two beautiful hours with
him, and uh we always say it wasprobably the most difficult day
of our lives, but but it wasalso the most perfect day of our
lives, just to see the workingsof the Lord in incredibly
(56:24):
evident ways, you know, just somany different things.
Um that would be a whole hour initself if I got into that, but
just yeah, the kindness of theLord um was so evident, and just
how that changes things, right?
Like to experience loss in thatkind of way, my heart is deeply
(56:45):
burdened for those who losechildren.
And but, you know, I got to gohome that day, and um we
actually got to go home thatsame day, and the next morning
to to wake up to my boys.
(57:07):
You know, life takes on adifferent color after something
like that, and it just made lifetogether, both with Britney,
with my boys, with the church,more vibrant.
That God has endured everythingfor our sake.
(57:31):
He endured great loss,suffering, betrayal, loneliness,
hunger, sweating to the point ofdrops of blood coming out, and
he did that for the joy that wasset before him.
And so that whole through thatwhole process, Brittany and I
(57:53):
just continually encouraged oneanother, supported one another,
spoke to one another about howwe just wanted to honor the Lord
in our suffering.
We did not want to sin againsthim in our suffering.
Because we know what he had donefor us, and we wanted to honor
that rightly.
And so just the beauty of seeingthe way that the church came
(58:15):
around us, and again, justanother miracle of God's
providence.
Um we have good friends who hadset up for the church to write
us letters for the 30 daysleading up to Emma, our son's uh
birth, like his due date.
(58:37):
And God and his again just greatwisdom, they set it up the day
before she went into labor.
He came 30 days early.
And so for every day for 30 daysafter we got home, we had a
letter in a mailbox full ofencouragement, full of just
(59:03):
scripture, just incredible tosee the love of Christ expressed
so wonderfully in his people.
SPEAKER_01 (59:14):
Amen.
And I think yeah, that's how Godcreates us to walk together in
community, and yeah, so thankfulfor you sharing that.
I know that's hard what you guyswalk through, but hopefully also
encouraging the decision youguys made.
I know it was always anencouragement to us that, like
you said, the world's tellingyou to go the other way, to just
(59:35):
take the easy route rather thanthe faithful.
Exactly.
And I think, like you said, withJob as the great example in all
this, Job didn't sin.
He continued to trust.
The Lord gives, the Lord takesthe way, but we'll learn
something from this.
And I think I remember storiesof like the medical staff being,
you know, wowed by why wouldthis couple do this?
(59:56):
I need to look into this.
So if God uses that to help.
Other people know our Savior,how amazing that is.
And hopefully, as we've recordedthis, you know, if you're out
there, you've walked throughthat.
I think you said earlier, youknow, Satan wants you to think
you're the only one.
SPEAKER_03 (01:00:11):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (01:00:12):
Whether it's drugs, addiction, uh, you know, just
your brokenness, you know,dealing with that hardship, you
know, he wants us isolated, butthat's not what we're called to
do, but yeah, called to bedifferent.
So, well, man, that's uh a lot,you know.
And hopefully for the Life Talkfamily, you get to know our
leaders that, you know, again,like we talked about at the
(01:00:33):
lead-in, we are imperfectpeople.
Uh, we're just blessed to serve.
And Cody is an elder and leaderhere.
You know, certainly, hopefully,if you see him on Sundays, you
know, reach out to him.
Hopefully, you're encouraged byhis testimony.
Um, man, he's one of thesmartest guys I know.
We talk books all the time, andI'm just like, man, I think this
guy's read 10 board ten timesmore than I have.
(01:00:53):
I gotta catch up.
But uh just blessed to hear yourstory, some of those things that
God has redeemed, and I think,like you said, his faithfulness
to all generations andthroughout our life.
You know, I think I was even asyou were talking, I was
thinking, you know, went throughJonah recently.
The word of the Lord came againto Jonah.
So, like you said, whether it'sBrittany or, you know, those
opportunities, you know, throughserving and coming back into
(01:01:17):
church in a lot of ways, youknow, yeah.
God is the God of secondchances.
SPEAKER_00 (01:01:20):
Yeah, even those little breadcrumbs of faith for
me to follow.
And yeah, just in closing, likeI can say a verse that is deeply
impacted me is just in Psalm 22where the Lord says or David
says, from from my mother'swomb, you have made me trust
you.
And I have seen that in my ownlife.
(01:01:43):
How just from a young age in myrebellious years and everything,
there was always this underlyingtrust in God.
And and when I finally get toknow him, I I mean, you know,
John 17 says, This is eternallife, that they may know you.
And and I believe that, and Ipray everyone listening would
(01:02:07):
believe that that to know God iseternal life.
It is everything that we'researching for.
Amen.
SPEAKER_01 (01:02:14):
Well, Cody, thanks so much for taking the time for
us.
Lifehouse Family.
Hope you're encouraged.
Uh, keep tuning in.
We try to share these with youperiodically just to encourage
you, remind you, whatever you'regoing through, uh, people have
been through it, and God isgreater than your circumstances.
Amen.
Cody, thanks so much, and LifeTalk family.
We'll see you next time.
(01:02:35):
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well.
And we'll look forward to seeingyou next Monday for another
great episode.
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