We'll Be Right Back, After These Messages

Remember the eerie Parkey butter dish whispering "butter" to lonely homemakers? The Kool-Aid Man violently crashing through walls? Or that problematic Calgon "Ancient Chinese Secret" commercial that has lived rent-free in our brains for decades? These aren't just random memories—they're powerful marketing campaigns that embedded themselves permanently in the collective Gen X consciousness.

In this nostalgia-packed episode, we explore the surprising staying power of commercial jingles and TV ads from our youth. From McDonald's impossibly catchy menu songs to the Life cereal kid who supposedly died mixing Pop Rocks and Coke (spoiler: he didn't!), these marketing moments didn't just sell products—they became part of our cultural DNA.

We dive deep into food mascots that bizarrely came to life, cereal preferences that still influence our shopping habits, and fast-food restaurants that have changed as dramatically as we have since childhood. The conversation takes unexpected turns through our personal relationships with American cheese slices, the complex hierarchy of restaurant staff during the Door Dash era, and why McDonald's slidey-things need to make a comeback immediately.

What makes these decades-old jingles stick when we can't remember where we put our keys five minutes ago? Why did we desperately want Mrs. Butterworth to talk to us? And how did the Oscar Mayer song permanently teach an entire generation to spell "bologna"? Join us for this hilarious trip down memory lane that proves advertising works in mysterious and permanent ways.

Have a favorite commercial jingle still stuck in your head? Share it with us on social media @LikeWhateverPod or email us at [e-mail]!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 2 (00:20):
We're never done as ever laughing and sharing our
stories.
Clever, we'll take you back.
It's like whatever.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
Welcome to Like Whatever, a podcast for by and
about Gen X.
I'm Nicole and this is my BFF,heather Hello, so we're trying
something different today.
You will anyway, if you'rehearing this something really
tragic has happened.

Speaker 2 (00:53):
We have just not been able to get our shit together
for a week.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
Yes, so we decided today actually we are recording
on Memorial Day.
Yes, we did the episode for theweek earlier.
We took a break and I made uscheeseburgers.

Speaker 2 (01:13):
My favorite meal.

Speaker 1 (01:15):
Which is why I made them.
I also bought her tasty cakes,but anyway, we haven't had those
yet.
They were supposed to come backhere with us.
I don't think they made it.

Speaker 2 (01:24):
They did not.
I didn't know they weresupposed to come back here with
us.
I don't think they made it.
They did not.
I didn't know they weresupposed to come back.

Speaker 1 (01:28):
All right, so yeah.
So we decided we would, asHeather puts it, get an episode
in the can.
In the can so that whensomething horribly tragic does
happen to one or both of us, wow, we can still make sure you
guys are entertained.
Yes, so yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:48):
We're going to start we think we're going to start
doing this on the holidays thatwe get together to get a couple
of them, so that A, we can maybeeven take a break, but then we
won't get to see each other.
Yeah, I'm also learning how todo Google Meets and record them,
which did not go well a littlebit ago.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
But we have started that process.
We have a few guests that areinterested in either being on
the show or having us come totheir shows, so we are really
trying to make that work now.
We keep saying that, but Ithink we're actually taking
steps forward to make thathappen now happen as soon as I
figure out how to convert thefile.

(02:27):
Yeah, then we'll be down yeah,so that's how we spent our break
um in between this week'sepisode and this can episode.
Yes, save for survival times.

Speaker 2 (02:44):
The end of the world as we know it.

Speaker 1 (02:49):
And we're changing up just a tiny bit in the format,
in that usually it's every otherweek One of us has the topic,
the other one, but this timeHeather came up with the topic
idea and we both just kind ofthought of memories of both of
them.
We did a little research, butanyway, we hope it works.
We hope you like it and ifyou're hearing that, no, we'll

(03:14):
see you again live next week,hopefully.

Speaker 2 (03:17):
Send flowers.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
Thoughts and prayers would be appreciated.
They're our favorite, yeah.

Speaker 2 (03:25):
So let's fuck around and find out about TV
commercials from our youth.

Speaker 1 (03:30):
Yes, yes, this is fun because it's crazy to me how
many jingles from commercials inour childhood still are on a
pretty regular basis in the loopplaying in my head all the time
oh yeah, like all the time whenwe were doing this.

Speaker 2 (03:45):
I was like, oh yeah, I all the time.
Oh yeah, Like all the time whenwe were doing this.
I was like, oh yeah, I rememberthat one.

Speaker 1 (03:48):
Oh yeah, I remember that one, oh yeah, yeah, and now
we're really going to have themstuck in our head forever.

Speaker 2 (03:52):
Oh God yes.

Speaker 1 (03:54):
They have been yeah, but everything had like super
jingle.
I don't feel like it's likethat anymore.
Either that or well.
I mean.
Well, I mean, I guess Is therereally like a?
There's the lemu emu, yeah andliberty bibberty.
Let's just give everybody an adtoday.

(04:14):
Well, I will say that carinsurance commercials probably
have the highest rate of jingles, although I guess grocery
stores sometimes.
But I feel like particularlylike walmart commercials will
piss me off now because I hatewalmart and I'll hear a good
song and I look up and it's afucking walmart commercial and
I'm like god damn it I mean it'sa super effective strategy

(04:37):
because I mean, obviously 50years later we're remembering
these commercials and we cansing every line to them.

Speaker 2 (04:44):
Yes, so it's, obviously it's.
And there's commercials I knowon the radio from my youth that
was just played over and overand over.
Then I still remember everydamn word too.
I can't do math, but I remembersome jingles.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
And I feel like they did a better job of creating
those wormholes in your brainthan now, because I'll know the
song Well.
Now we have phones too, so alot of times on commercial
breaks I'm playing on my phonedoing something.
So I'm not looking at thecommercial.
So I know the song, I know thewords and it's funny.

(05:22):
Sometimes I know the wholecommercial but I have never seen
it, ever.
I'll like look up and like oh,who's the characters in this
commercial?

Speaker 2 (05:29):
Like oh, I don't know , JG Wentworth, mm, hmm, 877
Cashnell, I mean well, buy anycarcom.
It's also, I feel like becauseof streaming, we probably don't
watch as many commercials.
I feel, like because ofstreaming, we probably don't
watch as many commercials, sothey probably invest their
advertising dollars elsewhere,other ways, yeah.

(05:51):
Because I mean, if you get, ifyou're paying for a premium,
you're not getting thecommercials.

Speaker 1 (05:56):
Yeah, I did notice that a lot of the commercials
nowadays are geared towards oldpeople like us.
Yeah, well, that's the otherissue, unless it's like a new
small business trying to get upoff the ground now we're the
target demographic.
We are and I don't like ourmusic and everything.
It's weird.

Speaker 2 (06:15):
I don't like when you're like watching tv and a
depeche mode song comes on andyou're like wait a minute, chili
peppers.

Speaker 1 (06:24):
sometimes it's even songs.
I'm like, wow, yeah, I meanthey just have the musical
version of it, but we know whatthe words are.

Speaker 2 (06:33):
I know what that means.
Can't fool me too.
Live Crew, that's aninappropriate song For your
Chinese buffet, okay.

Speaker 1 (06:50):
Speaking of Chinese.
That's a good segue.

Speaker 2 (06:52):
I'm going to start with the one that has always
bothered me the most because ithas lived rent free in my brain
since I was like five.

Speaker 1 (07:00):
I was like five.

Speaker 2 (07:01):
Well, this is the one we talked about before on one
of our episodes.
I don't remember.
That was like one of usremembered Calgon as one and one
of us remembered Calgon as theother.

Speaker 1 (07:18):
Well, and the funny thing is it was not the Calgon
of the Calgon Take Me Awaycommercials, it was the Calgon
laundry detergent, which I don'tknow that.
We hear a lot about Calgonlaundry detergent, I don't know
if that's still a thing, butyeah, I remember Calgon for the
bathtub, me too.

Speaker 2 (07:33):
The exhausted mom Calgon, take me away.
Yeah, yeah, I didn't rememberthis one.
Oh really, oh my gosh, youdon't remember the ancient
Chinese?
I mean, I kind of do.

Speaker 1 (07:49):
I remember the ancient Chinese.
I mean, I kind of do.
I remember the words of it, butI don't remember it exactly.
This is one of those littlecatchphrases that sticks in my
brain, because at the end thecustomer says ancient Chinese
secret.
Huh, and I don't know why thatalways sits in my head.
So anyway, for those of youthat don't remember and it is
very inappropriate, and I dolike to sometimes go through and
point out places we've messed-up in history and why it's not
okay anymore.

(08:10):
So this is perhaps one of themost memorable ads of any Gen
X's childhood, except forHeather's.
This short, sweet butunforgettable commercial from
Calgon was part humor, part PSAand all cringe.
So let's start with the script.
That was not very long orcomplex, but we still remember

(08:33):
it.
So the scene is a white middleaged woman is picked up, is
picking up her laundry at a shopand marvels at the results.
She asked the person behind thecounter, an asian man um, how
do you get the shirt so clean,mr lee?
To which he leans in closer toher response ancient chinese

(08:53):
secret with a knowing smile,except he said it with a really
terribly terrible racist yes,exactly.
Uh.
The camera pans to mr lee'swife, who was behind a curtain
in another room and who hadoverheard the whole exchange,
breaking the fourth wall.
She turns to the camera andspills the beans and says my

(09:13):
husband, some hot shot.
Here's his ancient Chinesesecret, new, improved Calgon.
She then holds up a box ofCalgon laundry detergent to show
the audience.
A voiceover comes in and extolsthe virtues of this wondrous
product, explaining how it doeswhat it does, which is get clean
clothes cleaner.

(09:34):
After the sales pitch, the wifenow pulls back the literal
curtain, emerging from the backroom to shout we need more cow
gone.
Uh.
The woman who had just beenabout to leave um with her crisp
clean shirts, uh.
Turns back to mr lee and saysancient chinese secret, huh, uh.

(09:56):
To which he sheepishly looks atthe customer with a look that
says loud and clear I lied andI've been busted, so I did dig a
little.
Dig a little deeper into thisone, because it has been in my
brain.
She has been obsessed so verymany years and I remember the
commercial vividly, and I don'tremember a lot of things vividly

(10:18):
, um so stereotypes about asianpeople owning laundry, laundry
shops that started a centurypreviously but still continued
well into the 70s.
The simple but unforgettablehook, ancient Chinese Secret.
Who doesn't love a good secret?
Nor anyone who lived in adecade when the commercial

(10:39):
played on TV on a constant andcontinual loop all day, every
day.
Mrs Lee was the star of theshow.
Clearly it was she who wasrunning the business, as she was
in the know about the best wayto keep Mr Lee's shirts and
other items customers brought inso clean.
The overall message that it'salways a woman behind the scenes

(11:00):
who is doing all the work andthat men are generally not able
to handle domestic chores was atheme that ran, it says, here
throughout the decade and beyond.

Speaker 2 (11:11):
but I'm gonna say like that's just still going on
today, don't just what do theycall it now?
Weaponized incompetence.
I can't complain.
I don't do our laundry, so Idon't have any ancient Chinese
secrets.

Speaker 1 (11:27):
He does our laundry yeah, it's not like that in this
household, but I know it isstill a thing.
It is still a thing, yeah, sothat was that commercial.
I feel good getting that off mychest, thank God.
Hopefully now I can stopthinking about it all the time.

Speaker 2 (11:43):
I don't think we're going to do that deep of a dive
on all the rest of them.
We're just going to member them.

Speaker 1 (11:48):
Yeah, yeah, and we're not.
I just really needed to getthat one off my chest.

Speaker 2 (11:51):
That's all.
It's your podcast, yeah.

Speaker 1 (11:53):
I have a couple other ones where I have some little
fun facts.

Speaker 2 (11:55):
Okay, but I did zero research other but that's
because my episode was the onethat was earlier.

Speaker 1 (12:05):
Yeah, and she does a lot more work on this podcast
than I do.
Anyway, true story.
I can pick up the slack.

Speaker 2 (12:10):
Now I have to learn how to convert a Google file.

Speaker 1 (12:13):
Good luck, I am.

Speaker 2 (12:19):
So the ones I was thinking well, first of all.
Well, how about we do this?
Because I wanted to, we'll dolike the food that comes to life
.

Speaker 1 (12:29):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (12:29):
Because that's the ones.
Okay, like the Kool-Aid man.

Speaker 1 (12:33):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (12:33):
I mean bro chill.
What is up with that?

Speaker 1 (12:38):
I know, and I can't even really I remember being
fascinated with this commercialand of course I remember it and
I remember him yelling it and Iremember kids running and
screaming and water and likewhat, and, but I don't ever
remember if I liked it or I wasscared like whose fever dream
was that?
And I grew up drinking kool-aid, so maybe that's why I wasn't

(12:59):
really affected by it because Iwas like dude, we got like 20
envelopes on the regular.

Speaker 2 (13:04):
He ain't coming through the wall.

Speaker 1 (13:06):
That's just crazy, like I don't know like I never
thought when I was drinking mykool-aid kool-aid man was going
to come through the wall no, Ididn't.

Speaker 2 (13:15):
I don't want to say I didn't, maybe I would always
hope that the kool-aid man wouldcome busting through.

Speaker 1 (13:20):
You did have a lot of hopes and dreams based off of
commercials.
I really did.

Speaker 2 (13:24):
Yeah, I really.
So up until the last, likemaybe two or three years, I had
a serious tv watching problemwhere it's all I did.
Um, I don't know why it stopped, I don't know what happened,
but I used to know everythingthere was to know about every tv
show.
Ever maybe you'll get back toit maybe I've spent like just
hours and hours and hours of mylife obsessed with tv.

(13:49):
Plus, I have that weird thingwhere I feel like, um, what's it
called likeanthropomorphization of things?
um nothing is inanimate in myeyes.
That I also call thedisinfication of things um so
maybe that's why I just wantedmy kool-aid.

(14:09):
No, you know what it was.
I know exactly what it was.
I always wanted the pitcher.

Speaker 1 (14:14):
Oh, I like that pitcher I have a pitcher that
looks kind of like do you like?

Speaker 2 (14:19):
I wanted a glass glass yeah, I want a glass, but
I've had a glass.
I make my son tea in it in thesummer.
I never had a glass pitcher, itwas always just those plastic
ones.
Yeah, so maybe that's what itis Like.
I just really want that pitcher, so maybe you can cure your.

Speaker 1 (14:34):
Kool-Aid man obsession by just buying the
pitcher.

Speaker 2 (14:38):
I don't even know if you can buy the pitcher
somewhere.
I'm going to write Kool-A aletter.
Yeah, I'd be like, hey, whereyou get that picture.
I really like the picture andlike the little ice cubes in it
were just perfect and he wasalways red, which red is always
my favorite flavor red is myfavorite flavor, the fruit punch
.
And then my second well,actually, I lied, fruit punch is

(14:58):
my second favorite black cherryI was gonna say black cherry
but you cannot get black cherryanymore and how was it so much
better than regular cherry?

Speaker 1 (15:07):
I don't know Like it was a huge difference.
I know because I don't likecherry.
They don't make it anymore.

Speaker 2 (15:12):
It's very hard to find those little packets only
come with like.
They only have like four orfive flavors in those packets
now.

Speaker 1 (15:18):
I don't think I've bought Kool-Aid since my kids
were little I I bought Kool-Aidsince my kids were little.

Speaker 2 (15:28):
I actually have some black cherry in my cabinet right
now.
My friend's mom used to make usDouble Decker's peanut butter
and jelly sandwiches and blackcherry Kool-Aid.

Speaker 1 (15:37):
All right, tell me about these peanut butter and
jelly sandwiches and I will tellyou why.
What is a Double Decker Like?
Explain to me this sandwichBread.

Speaker 2 (15:47):
Okay, peanut butter, no Jelly Bread you why?
What is a double decker like?
Explain to me this sandwichbread.
Okay, peanut butter, no jellybread, but one side, that that
middle piece of bread has peanutbutter on both sides.
You are freaking me the fuckout right now.

Speaker 1 (15:58):
And then the top piece had jelly so yesterday we
had peanut butter and jellysandwiches for lunch.
And then my husband was playingmadden with my nephew, as he
does, and he was telling himthat we had just had peanut
butter and jelly sandwiches.
And first of all he said didyou warm the bread?

(16:19):
What right, so we can all agree.
That's weird.
Nobody eats grilled peanutbutter and jelly no he, he said
like lightly toasted, but stillno, oh fuck, no, no, it's got to
be like white bread, whitewonder bread or sunbeam like
super soft yeah, well, we had iton the super cheap like wheat

(16:40):
bread.

Speaker 2 (16:40):
I'm pretty sure it's just white bread I just bought
sunbeam and I don't give a shit.

Speaker 1 (16:43):
I will pay for the sunbeam um, so anyway,
christopher said, my nephew saidthat he had a piece of bread in
the like three pieces of bread,and we're like what is this
what your mother taught you?
Like what is wrong with you?
So, all right, this is likecreepy, because this is like the

(17:06):
second thing.
That's really odd that you andmy nephew came and you already
have things in common we bothwork for the post office there's
more than that, but a lot ofyour both of your oddities.
He's a very um, he has gottenbetter with his eating since
he's gotten older a little bit,but he's a chicken nugget

(17:28):
grilled cheese yeah, kind of guy.
Mozzarella sticks, oh yeah, hedoes like broccoli, though,
which is I like broccoli withsalt.

Speaker 2 (17:38):
I gotta have a lot of salt on it, yeah no cheese
though I don't like broccolicheese yeah, my latest.

Speaker 1 (17:45):
I've been roasting broccoli, so just buy the
florets, put some like olive oilI know, so I'm gonna microwave
it to to death and then roast it.
Now it's gotta be like oh, youlike it soft and squishy.
Yeah, I like it.
Crispy, I like it.
I want it microwaved to death.

Speaker 2 (18:00):
I want it to die.
You want it to be to death.
I want it to die.
You want it to be cream ofbroccoli.

Speaker 1 (18:05):
I want it to be horribly dead.
Yeah, that's crazy, all rightAnyway.

Speaker 2 (18:13):
So yeah, try it sometime.
I don't know, it's fuckingamazing.
It's like a grown up PB&J.
It's like a double cheeseburgerof peanut butter and jelly.
I don't like doublecheeseburgers, why it's too much

(18:34):
meat I also, when I get subs,hoagies, whatever you want to
call it take half the meat off.
I don't know what to say thendon't make.
I'm telling you though, trysometime, but you got to do it.

Speaker 1 (18:41):
The middle piece has to have peanut butter on both
sides and I remember like afterwe were kind of talking, they
went back to playing the gameand I remember hearing my
husband say to him wait, there'speanut butter on both sides.
So I know that they talkedabout that part of it.

Speaker 2 (18:54):
Oh my gosh, that's so it's very important to put the
peanut butter a, because peanutbutter?
Because the peanut butterspreads easier than jelly like
correct jelly is kind of dependson what jelly you get.
Right can be, you know, wonky,um.
So the peanut butter spreadsbetter.
So when you put the jelly sideand then you put the peanut

(19:15):
butter on top of it and then youhave to put more peanut butter
on this piece, it won't slide asmuch right because it's peanut
butter and not jelly, and thenyou put jelly independently of
the top piece yeah.
Yes, it's weird, I still makethem to this day.
Sorry, I like a double-decker,okay.

(19:37):
So yeah, kool-aid man, he'sawesome.
I think it's the pitcher Otherfood that talks this one.
I only would let my mom.
I was the only one that went tothe grocery store with my mom.
Nobody else wanted to gobecause everybody hated it.
And I love to go because thenmom would let you pick out
whatever you wanted.
Oh god, your mom got the bestsnacks, so I got to pick this,

(20:01):
what cereal we had, and all that, and probably that was for the
best anyway, because I'm sopicky.
So I always wanted mrsbutterworth because I was the
only one.
Nobody in my family is.
I'm an early bird, my dad is,but I'm even earlier than him.
Um, so I was the only one up inthe morning and she would buy

(20:24):
eggos and we would just, youknow, make the eggos.
So I wanted mrs butterworthbecause she talked to you but
she never did, and it's not verygood syrup so well, and she was
very sweet in the commercialsthough she was sweet in the
commercial, but I don't thinkshe's as sweet in the bottle.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
She was like a little old grandma.

Speaker 2 (20:46):
Yeah, she was, and so I wanted Mrs Butterworth to
talk to me while I was making it.
And she doesn't, I know it'svery disappointing.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
Do you keep your syrup in the fridge?

Speaker 2 (20:54):
No, are you supposed to I?

Speaker 1 (20:57):
can never remember which one it's probably like,
like real maple syrup, you'reprobably supposed to, but I
don't.

Speaker 2 (21:08):
I use the garbage.
Yeah, yeah, I use it's justsugar water or whatever?

Speaker 1 (21:09):
yes, colored sugar water delicious pretends like
it's maple well, I have a foodthat talks and this is a good
place to put this in, so I'mglad that you brought it up, and
it's not one that particularlysticks out to me, but I remember
freaking me out a little bit.
Do you remember the parquet?
I was gonna say parquet and itwould say butter.
Yep, parquet, yes, and thelittle butter dish was, and it

(21:30):
was always somebody in the roomalone like and this thing's
talking to it like so that'sanother thing.

Speaker 2 (21:37):
Like I feel like maybe I'm the crazy one, because
I always thought that, like allthese things would talk to you
if you were the only person inthe room, like Snuffleupagus,
okay, so that was yeah.
But, none of them talked to meand I was always in the room.
Yeah, do you know why?
They changed Snuffleupagus sothat everybody could see him in

(22:00):
the 80s.
Because they were afraid thatkids wouldn't talk about sexual
abuse, that adults wouldn'tbelieve them, so they made
Snuffy come out.
I just learned that the otherday.
That's so sweet, I know.
Yeah, so it's not a lot of kids.

Speaker 1 (22:19):
That's why.

Speaker 2 (22:22):
Anyway parquet.

Speaker 1 (22:23):
Butter.

Speaker 2 (22:23):
Parquet, butter Parquet.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
Yeah, like I said, I don't have a lot to add to that
one.
I just it's vivid in my headand I remember it being a little
creepy.

Speaker 2 (22:37):
It was a little creepy.
Maybe I just didn't, I don'tknow.
My other one was the gravytrain With a little.
I want man, we man.
Yeah, I wanted that chuck wagondidn't they like?
Open the pantry and that cameout, and it came busting.

Speaker 1 (22:52):
Yeah, the little chuck wagon came running through
, yeah and he was like yosemitesound sounding kind of yeah, but
it never my mom a she wouldn'tbuy it because we did.

Speaker 2 (23:03):
whatever garbage we fed to the dog, it was not gravy
drain or whatever the chuckwagon was belonging to, but that
one I remember.
I always.
I don't know.
I think I just really fell forthe commercials that made these
things come to life.
I was just like, yeah, thattotally is going to happen.

Speaker 1 (23:22):
Well, you have a very good imagination.
I have an incredibly insaneimagination.

Speaker 2 (23:27):
Right that probably is not good.

Speaker 1 (23:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (23:32):
It gets away from me.

Speaker 1 (23:34):
Well, at least you know it comes to you naturally.
It's always been there.
Yes, it has Probably fromliving in a van.

Speaker 2 (23:42):
If you'd like to listen to our episode about me
living in a van, it was Dragon'sDream.
Check it out.
I living in a van, if you'dlike to listen to our episode
about me living in a van wasdragon stream.
Yeah, check it out, I lived ina van it's probably our best one
.
Yeah, that's probably why Iwanted all these things to come
to life, because I had to livein a van by myself.

Speaker 1 (23:54):
You just wanted something to be your friends so
it's all I ever wanted in life.

Speaker 2 (24:00):
it's one fucking friend.
M Mrs Butterworth, get off yourass.

Speaker 1 (24:07):
Oh man.

Speaker 2 (24:08):
Well, most of these are food, I mean.

Speaker 1 (24:12):
Are we still doing talking food?

Speaker 2 (24:13):
Oh, did we run out of talking food?

Speaker 1 (24:15):
I don't know, I didn't see any more for me.
My next one is a food thoughthe life cereal Mikey Yep.

Speaker 2 (24:27):
Remember that whole thing about Mikey was dead
because he he ate pop rocks?

Speaker 1 (24:28):
yep, it was an urban legend um coke and pop rocks.
I believed it, I did when ithappened yeah, I used to be
really scared of drinking sodawith pop rocks, um, yeah, so he.
That was the one where mikeydidn't like anything.
He was a very picky eater, yeah, and he tasted the life cereal

(24:49):
and they were like, hey, mikeyand he likes it.

Speaker 2 (24:52):
He likes it.
I tried because I thought too,maybe I would like it if mikey
liked it.

Speaker 1 (24:58):
Maybe I would like, I don't yeah, I don't see that
being something you like.
I love it.
It's one of the few cereals Ican eat when it gets squishy.
Um, although I do try to eat itfast, like when I have cereal,
I make sure everything is inplace.
All I have to do is pick thebowl up and go sit down and eat,
because once the milk hits it,do you know they have a special
bowl for that.

Speaker 2 (25:17):
Now where you put you should serious look into it
it's a bowl and it has cereal init.
Either the milk is in thebottom and you push the cereal
and you feed the cereal in asyou go.
I'm gonna look for it for you,okay, but it's a special bowl
and it keeps all your cerealcrisp like you feed it into the
milk.

(25:37):
Yeah, because there are somecereals that I eat with milk and
some what I eat without milk ormilk on the side.

Speaker 1 (25:43):
I should say well, there are some.
I speed through and then, likeLucky Charms, I eat all the
cereal first and I save themarshmallows, and I like doing
that because the longer they'rein the milk, the softer they get
.
I like it when they reach thepoint where you put your mouth
and it just like dissolves.

Speaker 2 (25:58):
Dissolves.

Speaker 1 (25:59):
They're so good.
So yeah, it does depend on thecereal, but as um.

Speaker 2 (26:08):
so yeah, it does depend on the cereal, but as a
general rule, I'm gonna eat mycereal pretty fast because I
want to get it done before Ilike to soak my um captain
crunch because otherwise youjust shred the shit out of your
mouth the only captain crunch Ilike is peanut butter.
Um, I like straight up, captaincrunch.
Um, I do eat my loops withfruit loops.
Milk is always on the side ofmy fruit loops and I just mostly

(26:29):
I eat fruit loops as a snack.

Speaker 1 (26:31):
I just like a, like a toddler with cheerios I put
them in a little bag and I bringit to work I'm like that with
frosted mini wheats and I'll dothat with life cereal as well.
I'll just put like cereal in abaggie and eat that see, I don't
need any help there.

Speaker 2 (26:44):
I eat one healthy cereal total and product 19.

Speaker 1 (26:50):
I didn't know.
They still made.

Speaker 2 (26:51):
Yes, I don't know that they make product 19
anymore, but product 19 I eatwith my milk on the side also
because one side of the product19 has whatever corn syrupiness
is on there and if you put it onyour tongue right I don't know,
I'm really weird about my foodso, and then my dad taught me
how to eat rice krispies.

Speaker 1 (27:08):
You fill the bowl, put our krispies pour milk over
the whole top and then put likeseven tablespoons of sugar.

Speaker 2 (27:15):
They make frosted rice krispies?
They do, but they're very hardto find they are.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
They used to be popular, yes, like I think when
we were like in our 20s theywere big.
You can still find them at FoodLion, but it's still different
than caking a bunch ofgranulated sugar, because then
the bottom of your bowl isfilled with sugar.
Right, and I typically don'tdrink the milk.
I do not drink the milk, but Iwill eat the sugar out of the

(27:41):
bottom of Rice Krispies.

Speaker 2 (27:43):
When our cat hears me making cereal he is super
excited and comes and sits rightnext to me, just to let me know
that he is there to finish themilk, if needed.

Speaker 1 (27:57):
He will drink the milk.
Yeah, a couple of my cats likethat too, including the podcast,
our podcast buddy Buddy, who issnoring on the floor right now
because he has sinus issues Veryloud and we've been in here a
long time today.
It's a lot, it is.

Speaker 2 (28:18):
Frosted Flakes is probably my number one cereal.
I love Frosted Flakes Mostlybecause they're great.

Speaker 1 (28:25):
I think my favorite would probably be Golden Grahams
.
I love Golden Grahams.

Speaker 2 (28:28):
I love Golden Grahams , yeah, and they really haven't
changed Like a lot of ourcereals have changed.

Speaker 1 (28:33):
Like Captain Crunch isn't even worth it.
No, not Captain Crunch, countChocula, not even worth buying
now.
It's just not right.

Speaker 2 (28:42):
Oh, you know what else I like?
Oh, the Sugar Smacks.

Speaker 1 (28:46):
I was never big into sugar.
I didn't like those honeycombs.
I don't like honeycombs.

Speaker 2 (28:51):
But sugar smacks.
Oh my God, yeah, and my growingup.
We just called them smacks.

Speaker 1 (28:56):
So when we go, it's easier that way yeah.

Speaker 2 (28:59):
Because my whole family is sweet people Like my
dad and I are and cereal andcereal.
Like my dad and I are in cerealand cereal.
We eat a lot of cereal.
We do eat a lot of cereal, um,so it would be like oh, what'd
you get?
I got smacks and pretty muchany cereal I picked, everybody
would be happy with.
But my dad does eat total, butwe have to load it with sugar I
love corn pops too.
I don't like corn pops.

(29:19):
I tried um frosted cheerios.
Can't do it I like cheerios.

Speaker 1 (29:26):
I really never met a cheerio.
I didn't like.
I don't need to get into allthese flavors like yes, I like
original with a lot of sugar onit and I like honey nut and they
used to make a peanut butterone.
Now it's peanut butter andchocolate ones.
They're in the same box, butthey used to serve just the
peanut butter and they werefucking amazing.
Oh my god, one of the bestcereals I ever had.

(29:46):
But I don't think they makethem like that anymore.

Speaker 2 (29:50):
Yeah, cereal, nothing good ever lasts what's for
dinner possibly I mean most ofthe time I do, and my husband
gets so mad he's like, well, whydidn't you?
Just because we'll have like a,I made you something, whatever
it's in there and then I'll justbring out cereal.
He's like well, why are youjust having cereal?
Because I fucking want cereal,because I'm 50 years old and I

(30:11):
can have fucking cereal if Ifucking want it.

Speaker 1 (30:13):
Yep, but real quick, just because I looked it up
After acting.
Mikey, whose last name isGilchrist, in real life went on
to receive a degree incommunications from Iona College
, and his passion for the NewYork Knicks would soon land him
a job in ad sales as director ofmedia sales at Madison Square
Garden.
Good for him.

(30:33):
So that's what Mikey did withhis life.

Speaker 2 (30:35):
Yeah, he did not drink Coke and pop rocks.
He did not Nope and explode.

Speaker 1 (30:38):
And then I think I saw somewhere, but I didn't look
into it.
I think a couple years ago heremade the Life Cereal
commercial.

Speaker 2 (30:45):
I think it was like for a Super Bowl commercial.

Speaker 1 (30:47):
Yeah, that's what I was thinking, something like
that, but whatever, that's notthat interesting, but I told you
anyway.
Yep All right.

Speaker 2 (30:55):
Most of these are food.

Speaker 1 (30:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (30:58):
Of course you cannot If you're going to go with
jingles.

Speaker 1 (31:10):
I feel like there's one jingle that we all can do,
and that's Oscar Mayer man.
I tested myself too.
I sang it out loud, and then Ilooked it up, I just read the
words and I was like nailed it.

Speaker 2 (31:18):
Yeah, my bologna is the first name.
It's O-S-C-A-R.

Speaker 1 (31:23):
My bologna is the second name.

Speaker 2 (31:26):
It's M-A-Y-E-R.

Speaker 1 (31:26):
I love to eat it every day, and if you ask me,
that's what I'll say, becauseOscar Mayer has a way with
B-O-L-O-G-N-A, and that is theonly way I can spell bologna,
yep.
It is how I've spelled it mywhole entire life.
Not that I have a lot ofoccasion to.

Speaker 2 (31:42):
I don't normally have to make.
Bologna is not.

Speaker 1 (31:45):
But I did for the script, so you had to sing it.
Yeah, Luckily I had that rightthere ready to go.

Speaker 2 (31:51):
I do only buy Oscar Mayer's bologna If I'm going to
buy bologna.

Speaker 1 (31:56):
Same.
Yes, I don't get it very oftenanymore.

Speaker 2 (32:00):
No.

Speaker 1 (32:02):
I did used to love like fried bologna sandwiches.

Speaker 2 (32:03):
I like a bologna and cheese, but it's got to be like
one piece of bologna, one pieceof cheese on white bread.
Yellow American, no, whiteAmerican, really.

Speaker 1 (32:13):
I mean, typically white American is what I'm going
to go for, but I feel likeyellow American.
It's more bologna-esque.
Yeah, maybe they match better.

Speaker 2 (32:21):
Agree to disagree.

Speaker 1 (32:26):
The color of our American shitty ass cheese.
Yeah, that was a fun commercial, though I I got spoiled.

Speaker 2 (32:31):
The problem with cheese for me white american and
yellow american.
I got very much spoiled becausewe had a restaurant and we had
cisco brand cheese and, um, ifyou've ever eaten in a
restaurant and you've had whiteamerican, typically it is the
cisco brand, which I think isalso block and barrel.

(32:53):
I have recently found that outcisco cheese it comes in a brick
.
We call it brick, I don't know.
It's a fuck ton of cheese andwe would get it and because we
would close labor day, weekendor somewhere anyway, we'd go all
winter and we didn't have anymoney.
So at the end of the season wewould order like a fuck ton of

(33:13):
shit from cisco.
But our all of our favoritecheese is the cisco cheese and
it was very hard to find afterwe stopped having a restaurant
what we were going to do aboutcheese.
But it is block and barrel.

Speaker 1 (33:30):
Oh, okay, all right, that's good.

Speaker 2 (33:32):
So now I can't get like the Peely.
I'm very picky about my cheese.
I have to buy, like deli cheeseI can't buy.

Speaker 1 (33:40):
So, yes, if I get deli cheese, it has to be Land
O'Lakes and I want the whiteAmerican.
And that's something I learnedfrom my dad as well, because one
of my dad's all-time favoritesnacks that I watched him eat my
whole life and he ate when Iwent to Florida in November.

(34:00):
So he's still going strongSaltines and Land O'Lakes, white
American sliced cheese and hewill just sit he's.
I'm a very slow eater and avery particular eater as well,
like I don't like to share foodoff my plate because I've got a
plan in my head of what orderI'm going to eat these bites in,
right, and I might be savingsomething best for last.

(34:23):
I might be saving somethingthat's going to go good with
another thing on the plate.
Like eating, I like the art ofeating right food.
But I feel like I got a lot ofthis from my dad, who is fairly
simple in the things that helikes, but he would sit there
and he would meticulously takethe slice and break it into four

(34:43):
pieces and have his foursquares and then they each fit
perfectly on the saltine and hewould take his time eating them.
And I also am a very slow eater, like anytime you go out to eat
with my dad.
You're going to be sittingthere two hours after you're
done eating Cause he and he doeslike break it down by the bite,
like so yeah, so that's mything with cheese, but if I'm

(35:08):
not going gonna get the deli, ifthey like don't have the kind I
want, I will do the craft.

Speaker 2 (35:11):
I won't.
My husband buys it all the timeand I just I don't disregard it
.

Speaker 1 (35:16):
I won't eat it straight, no um I'll use it on
grilled cheese.
Yeah, I'm, I asked to melt itit has to be a milk, it has to
be melted and it's not a badmelted product, it's not a bad
melted product.

Speaker 2 (35:27):
It doesn't melt nicely.
Yeah, that's probably becausethat's what it's designed to do,
exactly yes or that one, one umatom away from being plastic.

Speaker 1 (35:39):
Yeah, it's definitely .

Speaker 2 (35:40):
I do try to avoid processed foods as much as I can
, but I do not my only eatprocessed foods, as a rule
anyway um.

Speaker 1 (35:54):
Are we done talking about american cheese?
I think so okay, I think I'veexhausted my american cheese so,
um, here's another one that thejingle has always lived with me
, or inside of me, is uh, therice roni the san francisco
treat yeah, and it was just thecommercial, was just the little
trolley going down the hill itrang its little bell, uh-huh,

(36:18):
yep yep, um, so this.
So I wanted to find out why thatjingle like what does san
francisco treat have to do withrice-a-roni?
Because I've been to SanFrancisco and there's not like
monuments to rice-a-roni.

Speaker 2 (36:34):
Not a rice-a-roni in sight, no.

Speaker 1 (36:37):
So it happened to be where the original family-owned
pasta company that createdrice-a-roni had set up shop.
Now, this was a story that isgoing to piss you off, because
it's so simple.
And they have become wickedrich from all of this, I have no
doubt.
And it's just such a basic idea.
So the family that created itwas the Di Domenico family, and

(37:05):
they used to enjoy an oldArmenian dish that consisted of
rice, vermicelli pasta andchicken broth.
The rice and pasta were saltedin butter before the liquid was
added, giving the dish itsdistinctive taste.
In 1958, vince de Domenicodecided to take his recipe and

(37:25):
produce it for sale in grocerystores.
He placed the rice and pasta ina box just a plain old
cardboard box, just like itstill comes today Added a dry
seasoning mix it was just driedchicken soup broth.
Yep and sold it, and so, becauseit was made up of half rice and
half pasta, it was called RiceAroni and half pasta it was

(37:47):
called rice roni I make my ownrice roni I never, ever thought
to do that until I read this andI was like, well, goddamn,
because we.
My husband loves the chickenrice roni and I gotta say it's
probably my favorite.
I do like the broccoli andcheese one too, but anyway, um,

(38:07):
I feel like the last coupletimes I've bought it, it just
has tasted let me tell you whatI do with the rice, my own rice,
roni.

Speaker 2 (38:15):
First of all, I use the assini di pepe.
Um, that I usually use for mywedding soup.
Love it.
I haven't made it in a while.
Um, and then, because there'stiny little fucking meatballs
are a pain in the ass.
Yeah, I make my rice, I put itall in one pot.
It's an all-in-one-potsituation.
I just put it in there, withchicken broth and I don't use

(38:39):
chicken broth, I use a littlebit of water and I always use
bouillon.

Speaker 1 (38:46):
Do you brown the rice first?
Nope, do you cook?

Speaker 2 (38:49):
the pasta first.
Nope, I throw it all in one pot, cover it, dust a little bit
with water and then throw mychicken base, because that's
what I'm used to using.
It's just chicken base foreverything, very, very, very
strong chicken base.
And then you know what I do Ithrow my chicken in there, and
sometimes I throw broccoli inthere it depends on how I'm

(39:10):
feeling fancy, I don't know andthen hold on, wait for it.
Ranch seasoning get out, Iwon't get out.
It's fucking delicious.
And then cheddar cheese.
Yep, yep.
There you go, your own race.

Speaker 1 (39:27):
I'm definitely going to try a variation of that of
some sort that that soundsamazing, okay, so yeah, it was a
very boring story, but that'swhere cooking with heather and
nicole yeah, this a lot, a lotof food stuff coming up here.
All right, which one are wegoing to talk about next?

Speaker 2 (39:50):
Well, while we're on the songs, I mean, how many
songs has McDonald's had?

Speaker 1 (39:59):
And what's the one we all?

Speaker 2 (40:00):
Two Big Patty Special Sauce Lettuce.

Speaker 1 (40:02):
Cheese Pickles on.

Speaker 2 (40:03):
Sesame Seed Bun, there was another.
There's also one withFilet-O-Fish french fries.
Oh shoot, what was that one BigMac Filet-O-Fish quarter
pounder french fries, icy coke,thick shakes, sundaes and apple
pies.
Yeah, that one.

Speaker 1 (40:26):
I was like hold up that one's in there.
Somewhere the little man in myhead was running around checking
files like where is it?

Speaker 2 (40:32):
mcdonald's, I'm loving it.
No, big mac, no, they just haveso many.
I mean, I, nobody, nobody,nobody makes an iconic jingle
more than mcdonald's just nobodythe hands down, they probably
have the top 10 yeah they just Icould walk in.

Speaker 1 (40:53):
I've never worked at a mcdonald's.
I could walk in there and makea big mac to all beef patty
special sauce, lettuce cheese, apickle sesame seed bun.
Yeah, and big mac is myfavorite sandwich, from
mcdonald's as well.
So it's thousand island andit's only one piece of cheese
and it does have the third pieceof bread it does, unlike the
double cheeseburger right, andthat's why the big mac's okay

(41:16):
with me, because the burgers areseparated it's not a big glop
of meat right you know, myhusband the other day was like
you know, you always get adouble cheeseburger.

Speaker 2 (41:23):
Why don't you get the quarter pounder?
And I was like, because thequarter pounder has a nasty
fucking onions on it, whereasthe double cheeseburger has the
tiny, tiny little onions, butthe quarter pounder has the no,
unacceptable.

Speaker 1 (41:36):
Yeah, he was like why not?
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (41:37):
he was like why don't you just ask for the onions
from the double?

Speaker 1 (41:40):
I was like because it's just fucking easier to
order the goddamn doublecheeseburger because I don't
want to be that person that goesto mcdonald's and asks you to
make it special I'm there for areason to get in and out.
I don't want to be making, it'sjust I have not done that since
kaylin was a kid, because shewould only eat her cheeseburger
with ketchup and pickles, andyou know how stubborn she is I

(42:00):
do so.
I fed, I had to ask for itbecause she was not going to eat
it.
Nope Brat.

Speaker 2 (42:11):
She is.
Then of course you have all theother.
Like the juicy fruit, the gumswent through like a serious they
did and I think mostlyeverybody knows this now.
But the Doublemint twins theirsister is Katie Segal yes, Also,
if you watch the Pee Wee thing,I did not know that he knew

(42:35):
Katie.
They were very close.
I did not know that.
And Elvira, that makes sense.
They all worked in theGroundlings together.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
That's probably where the inspiration for Miss Yvonne
came from.
Miss Yvonne was one of themthat worked in the Groundlings
together.
That's probably where theinspiration for Missy Vaughn
came from.

Speaker 2 (42:48):
Missy Vaughn was one of them.
That was in the Groundlings,phil Hartman.

Speaker 1 (42:54):
Oh, who's the actor he's in like Quentin Tarantino
movies Lawrence Fishburne, yeah,cowboy Curtis.
Yeah, which is hilariousbecause he's such a badass now.

Speaker 2 (43:09):
Yes, they go into it.
On the documentary about how hecame in.
Oh, but because the rest ofthem were all from the
groundlings, he wasn't.
I can't wait, it's good.

Speaker 1 (43:23):
Anyway.

Speaker 2 (43:24):
Yeah, the juicy, so juicy fruit.
The taste, the juicy, so juicyfruit.
The taste, the taste, the tasteis going to move, wasn't that
juicy fruit?
And the big red freshness lastsright through it.
Your fresh breath goes on andon while you chew it.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
Big red was my favorite.
What I used to like to do isI'd take a stick of big red and
a stick of juicy fruit and rollthem up into like a little
pumpkin roll kind of thing.

Speaker 2 (43:53):
And then chew them together.

Speaker 1 (43:54):
Ew, yummy my mom chewed juicy fruit.

Speaker 2 (43:56):
I liked Big Red.

Speaker 1 (43:56):
I'm never a big double mint fan.

Speaker 2 (43:59):
I like the spearmint.

Speaker 1 (44:02):
I like the spearmint fresh enough.
If I was going to get spearmintgum, it was going to be fresh
enough.

Speaker 2 (44:05):
It's probably third on my list, because I will
always go for Big Red first.

Speaker 1 (44:11):
Yes, Seems like you got the most flavor out of Big
Red.
It did last longer.

Speaker 2 (44:17):
Unlike, I don't know, none of them do.
They're all terrible.
Yeah, they're probably betternow.
I don't know.
I haven't had gum in a while.
I haven't either.
I should get some.
How about Folgers?
The best part of waking up isFolgers in your cup?

Speaker 1 (44:33):
Yeah, and somebody, somebody other, somebody other,
some other coffee Maxwell Houseis.
Maxwell House is good to thelast drop.

Speaker 2 (44:43):
Good to the last drop , maxwell.

Speaker 1 (44:45):
House?
Yeah, and it was always.
They always dropped her on theholidays.
And it was like the kid cominghome from college.

Speaker 2 (44:51):
I thought that was Folgers.
The best part of waking up isFolgers in your cup and
everybody in the house wakes upand then you come down and
Susie's there.
Oh my God, yeah, from college.

Speaker 1 (45:02):
She snuck in.
Thank God they set the coffeepot for the night before.

Speaker 2 (45:08):
I know.
Thank god they set the coffeepot for the night before, I know
, and they didn't have a weapon.
Take her ass out, susie.
Don't be sneaking in people'shouses sounds like a tragedy.
Wait now it really does thebest part of waking up is
murdering tech.
Nine in your cup Breaking andentering Coke.

Speaker 1 (45:33):
Coke had so many, I put in information here on one
of them.
Just a jingle, just becauseI've always liked it.
I'd like to teach the world tosing.

Speaker 2 (45:41):
In perfect harmony.

Speaker 1 (45:45):
Perfect harmony, I'd like to teach the world a Coke,
coke and keep it company.
That's the song I sing.
All right, so, um, that was uh.
Bill backer was one of theco-writers of that jingle and he
said it wasn't a message fromcoca-cola that you should buy
the world a coke.

(46:06):
It was that each of usindividually should like to do
just that if we could.
It was the real thing and itwas a metaphor for peace.
I mean bullshit.

Speaker 2 (46:16):
It was to make money, but it's a nice thought it's
the same shit they got going onnow that I will fucking fall for
every god damn time they do itwith these names on the fucking
coke.
Oh, yours doesn't have it.
The one I have currentlydoesn't have the names on it,
but I will.
How'd I do that?

(46:37):
I don't know how you did it,but they have the names out
every fucking summer, and everysummer I will turn them all
around and look for somebody Iknow, and then I'll buy one.
If I see your name, I'll buyyou one.

Speaker 1 (46:51):
I feel like they're obscure names.
They are now.
I don't know a lot of them.
I only like it when I buy the12-pack of cans and they all say
homie.

Speaker 2 (46:59):
Homie that makes me happy Goat.

Speaker 1 (47:01):
Yeah, bruh yeah.

Speaker 2 (47:09):
No, I will go through them all if I see your name on
there.
Oh, I actually I meant to takea picture of it and I totally
forgot it might still be in myrefrigerator right now.
I found one that said lydia.
Oh, I specifically bought thatone because it said lydia, I
fall for it.
I'm hey coke, I will fall forit every time.
I will do it every time keepthem coming I won't.

Speaker 1 (47:28):
But yeah, also coke.
When did the polar bears start?

Speaker 2 (47:31):
geez, that was probably like the late 80s,
maybe 90s those have always been.

Speaker 1 (47:37):
They're cute.

Speaker 2 (47:37):
Yeah, they're always good I prefer coke over pepsi.
My dad and mom drink pepsi, soI definitely prefer coke I know
diet pepsi is too sweet orsomething, I don't know.
It's awful, it just doesn'ttaste right.

Speaker 1 (47:50):
No, definitely coke I like cherry coke zero I like
just coke zero.

Speaker 2 (47:56):
That's awesome it is.

Speaker 1 (47:58):
I don't know what the difference is between that and
diet coke and regular coke, butone has aspartame, one hasenda,
one has straight sugar.
So they're just all bad for us.

Speaker 2 (48:09):
Okay, actually, I think regular Coke is the best
for you.

Speaker 1 (48:12):
Yeah, it is.
I just prefer the taste of Diet.

Speaker 2 (48:16):
Coke, Me too no.

Speaker 1 (48:18):
And Diet.
Dr Pepper I like better thanregular Dr Pepper, but Sprite
I'll drink.
There is no such thing as agood diet.
Lemon, lime soda.

Speaker 2 (48:29):
No.
Oh, they're all Dr Peppertastes just like Dr Pepper.

Speaker 1 (48:32):
It does, and now they have a Dr Pepper zero.

Speaker 2 (48:37):
Did not know that, yep.
Yep, yep, yep oh man, and youknow what else tastes the same
yeah, diet, root beer is verytasty yeah, oh, I got one more
um slogan.
Okay, I think there's just onemore.
Oh, you know what else Iremember about the coke when new

(48:57):
coke came and they yeah, maxheadroom.
Yeah, new coke was terrible, itwas terrible what the hell?

Speaker 1 (49:06):
and then was it clear pepsi, clear pepsi.
That was weird, oh my god thatwas weird.

Speaker 2 (49:12):
It was hard like I couldn't do it because it's not
supposed to look like that.
I get it.

Speaker 1 (49:16):
It's actually probably better for you to be
clear, pepsi because then theydon't probably nasty ass food
coloring in it, but it's tooweird I wonder if that would
count when, like a doctor, saysyou can only have clear liquids,
could you have had clear Pepsi?
Yes, because it's clear.
Really the food coloring.

Speaker 2 (49:32):
Is what the problem?

Speaker 1 (49:33):
is oh yeah, I always thought it was the caffeine.

Speaker 2 (49:36):
No, it's the red in the food coloring.

Speaker 1 (49:38):
Oh yeah, that is one thing that I will agree with.
What our government's doingright now, it's getting rid of
those food colorings that areillegal and everywhere else in
the whole entire world exceptfor here.
I like food coloring.
I know that you do I like my,but sometimes we americans
aren't smart enough to well, I'mtrying to die, so yeah, yeah.

(50:00):
No, I'm not talking about you,I'm talking about other people.
I'm trying to eliminate myself.
Oh, one I did want to talkabout that I always loved was
Duncan the Duncan Donut.
Time to Make.
The Donuts Time to Make theDonuts Yep.
Yep by Fred the Baker.
That commercial started in 81,1981, and it ran for 15 years.

Speaker 2 (50:21):
Wow, yeah, I bet he was tired.
Yeah, did they retire him?
I hope.

Speaker 1 (50:27):
I meant to dive a little deeper into Fred Baker
and it just didn't happen.
You didn't have time to makethose donuts, I did not, so if
you want to know what happened,audience, you have to Google it.
That's the beauty of this, likewhen we just leave out facts,
if people really are like, well,what the fuck, you can just
Google it.
You can just Google it.

(50:48):
Look it up yourself.

Speaker 2 (50:50):
Do you know what else ?
Now that I see I also have one?
Do you remember this wasprobably more 90s, because I
don't think this was an 80sthing, but pizza rolls, pizza in
the morning, pizza in theevening, pizza at supper time.
When pizza's on a bagel, youcan eat pizza anytime.

Speaker 1 (51:05):
When pizza's on a bagel, you can eat pizza anytime
.
I love me a bagel bite.

Speaker 2 (51:07):
I will still eat bagel bites.
Fucking love them.
They gotta be microwaved,though.

Speaker 1 (51:15):
I don't like them, crispy yeah, that makes sense
they gotta be chewy there wassomething else, there was
another one, so I am stuck onband-aid brand cause band-aid's
stuck on uh, that's one that'salways stuck in my head.
There's one you brought upearlier.
I can't, it's not on my list.

(51:35):
It was something you had done.
Mentos the fresh maker.
No, it is a good one too,though, toys toys are us oh yeah
, how do we forget?

Speaker 2 (51:43):
I don't know I'm a toys r us kid.
They got the best for so muchless.
You really flip your lid frombikes to trains to video games.

Speaker 1 (51:51):
It's the biggest toy store there is gee whiz.
I don't want to grow up because, baby, if I did, I couldn't be
a toys r us kid.

Speaker 2 (51:59):
True story, though, because we grew up and toys r us
is gone, so yeah we did grow upand we cannot be Toys R Us kids
.

Speaker 1 (52:07):
So that was a self-fulfilling prophecy.
We didn't have.
We either didn't have a Toys RUs around us, which I don't
think we did, or my mom liedabout it, but I know.

Speaker 2 (52:17):
You had one in Dover, there was one in Dover.

Speaker 1 (52:19):
When we were kids.

Speaker 2 (52:20):
Yeah, there was definitely one.

Speaker 1 (52:22):
There was one in Salisbury, there was one in
Salisbury there was one in Dover, because I remember going to
one in Jersey with Jerseyrelatives and I ended up of all
the toys in a big toy store and,like my first time going, I buy
an umbrella, but it was aJeffrey umbrella, like it had
Jeffrey's rubber head on the topof it and it was like a clear

(52:44):
plastic one with likegiraffe-type looking stuff
around.
It was a really fly umbrella.
I think it was raining that daytoo, so I figured fuck it.

Speaker 2 (52:53):
I can use it so yeah.
That was my first Toys R Uspurchase.
It was independent, it wasn'tat the mall or anything.
It was over on the other sideof Salisbury so I know you had
to have one in Dover, had to.

Speaker 1 (53:07):
Probably sounds about right.
I'm trying to think though.

Speaker 2 (53:11):
I don't know if you're from here and you know
where the Toys R Us is well thenDover let us know.
Yeah, um, I don't know.
Do you this one?
Was I miss cleo?
You remember miss cleo callingme now?

Speaker 1 (53:27):
oh, my gosh.

Speaker 2 (53:28):
I'm pretty sure there's a documentary about her
there is, and she got into a lotof trouble.

Speaker 1 (53:32):
She did yeah but I mean seriously, if you were dumb
enough to fall for that shit,then I don't know who's really
the bad person here, I know.
If you could call.

Speaker 2 (53:41):
You want to call and spend money on it Because she
has no Jamaican accent at all.
No, no, nope, nope, miss Cleocall me now and that is.

Speaker 1 (53:51):
That doesn't hold up.
That's very insulting, veryextreme, yeah.
But yeah, I don't know.
I mean, what's the differencebetween her and these other
people who fill up a whole roomfull and and guess, oh, you're
dead relative standing over yourshoulder?

Speaker 2 (54:09):
no different.
They're all the same right, sowhy'd she get in trouble?
They all are the same.

Speaker 1 (54:14):
They all feed off of your grief yeah, yep, yep uh, of
course mentos the fresh maker,yeah there was still another one
you mentioned earlier TootsieRolls.

Speaker 2 (54:29):
The Tootsie Rolls, that wasn't it, but we did talk
about that how many licks doesit take to get to the center of
a Tootsie Pop?

Speaker 1 (54:38):
three, one, two three crunch yep, it's three.
Yeah, that one, though, like Ilove Tootsie Pops, I still do
this day.
I love Tootsie Pops and I neverwanted to bite it.
After the third lick, I want toenjoy this.
I've always been a hard candyfan.

(54:58):
I like hard candy, some hardcandy you know what?

Speaker 2 (55:01):
I have actually recently remembered that I liked
butterscotch.
Yeah, like your grandma alwayshad them in her pocket.
I'm hard-kidding, you know what?
I have actually recentlyremembered that I liked
Butterscotch yeah, like yourgrandma always had them in her
pocket.
And now is it maybe becausewe're older?
Now we're like you know what?
It would be really awesome,right now Butterscotch Like did
you just get?
Did you grow into butterscotch,or have you just always?
Or is it the nostalgia of it?

Speaker 1 (55:28):
I don't know.
I think I really genuinely likeit.
I know like a year ago a personin my office she's a little bit
old fashioned and she had likea jar of hard candies on her
desk and it was butterscotch.

Speaker 2 (55:37):
I was like, hmm, and I had it.
I was like, goddamn, that'sgood, I love me some
butterscotch.
There's an elderly lady on myroute that leaves me um snacks
all the time and she leaves mebutterscotch yes, that's so
precious.
She left me a banana the otherday she thought you looked a
little sickly.

Speaker 1 (55:55):
You know what she did one time just, oh, she's the
best.

Speaker 2 (55:58):
So my route is near a redner's and um, she lives
right next to the redner's.
So I was in another part of hercomplex delivering to another
one and I was getting stuff outof the back and here she comes
rolling up and she is literally90 years old, like she just had
her 90th birthday.
Um, she rolls up in the middleof the street, gets out of her

(56:20):
car in the middle of theintersection in the street she
shuffles over to the back of hercar, opens the back of her in
her trunk, pulled out it was a,it was a banana and she had
bought tasty cakes Open the boxof tasty to shuffle over and
bring me the banana and theblocked up traffic.

(56:41):
She's so precious, I love herso much.
She's the best I do.
She's always precious, I loveher so much.

Speaker 1 (56:45):
She's the best I do.

Speaker 2 (56:46):
She always leaves me a little note and some kind of
snack for every holiday, likethe banana was for Memorial Day
and then for every holiday.
There's like little snacks inthere.

Speaker 1 (57:02):
I love her.
I see here a couple other GreyPoupon.
Excuse me, sir, pardon me.
Sir, do you couple other graypoupon?

Speaker 2 (57:08):
excuse me, sir, pardon me sir, do you have any
gray I?
I use gray poupon for one thingand one thing only double takes
.
Yes, I knew you were gonna saythat don't tell my mom, I told
you okay, I won't.

Speaker 1 (57:22):
I remember tasting it when those commercials came out
and I was like this shit isnasty, because I was still a kid
right.

Speaker 2 (57:28):
So the whole point of that commercial is totally true
.
Like you do have to be olderand like sophisticated yes, it's
a more elevated.
It's not just your average.

Speaker 1 (57:37):
Throw it on a hot dog mustard exactly, it's fancy
mustard right, but now we gotcrafters and stuff that there's
like billions artisanal,artisanal mustard yes I am a big
mustard.
I am not.
I love it.

Speaker 2 (57:54):
I like it mixed in with things, but I don't like it
on its own.
I did though I did put mustardon my burger today.
I know just a little bit just alittle smack girl.

Speaker 1 (58:04):
I even made sure to get the Heinz ketchup out for
you.

Speaker 2 (58:05):
I know I had that too .
I only eat Heinz ketchup.
I get complaining when I haveto have it, and she came here
once and I didn't have it.
It was awful Generic.

Speaker 1 (58:15):
It was generic, because I don't really taste the
difference in ketchup.

Speaker 2 (58:18):
Huge difference.
I will never buy anythingexcept Heinz ketchup ever again.
Just in case you're here,because I don't go through it
fast enough to to need it.
To need, oh, I do.
Yeah, man, my husband gets sobent out of shape about it
because we have just giantthings of ketchup and the.
When we first started livingtogether I bought like the BJ's,

(58:39):
like the two giant, like 76gallon drums of ketchup and he
was like why do we have?
and I was like you'll see, andthen and then we got through one
and he was like, oh my god, didyou eat all that ketchup?
And I was like, yep, sure did Iput ketchup on everything.

Speaker 1 (58:59):
Ketchup in the fridge or no?
Yes, okay, although it usuallydoesn't last long enough in my
house to really matter but Imean, I do know that ketchup
will go bad from working inrestaurants and they get left on
the table and if it's a hotrestaurant it will explode that
bottle and it will explode onyou yes, yeah so, but I didn't
know if just general probablydon't need to temperature, but I

(59:21):
do.
I like it cold it's one of thoseones I feel like, just because
I've seen it turn I've smelledit when it turns, so I'm like no
yeah I keep all of them inthere, I think.

Speaker 2 (59:34):
I think I even keep the mustard in there I keep most
things in the fridge.

Speaker 1 (59:39):
I keep butter out on the counter, just some, yes, in
case I need it for toast orsomething.

Speaker 2 (59:44):
Yes, because I can't stand hard butter.

Speaker 1 (59:46):
No, no you can't put it on your toast you gotta let
it melt, then it takes foreverright, yeah, you gotta toast the
toast, put the butter on it,put it back in the toaster I use
country crock for my toast.

Speaker 2 (59:58):
I don't even use straight butter I get in trouble
.
We have to have two separate,different containers because he
likes butter and I don't, and Iam set in my ways.

Speaker 1 (01:00:11):
I can't believe you missed.

Speaker 2 (01:00:12):
Wendy's.
Where's the beef?
Yep, I don't like Wendy's.

Speaker 1 (01:00:18):
I know you don't like Wendy's, but they have square
burgers.
I know you like the old lady.
Where's the beef?

Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
Square burgers on a round roll is just wrong.
Sorry, sorry, wendy.

Speaker 1 (01:00:27):
They're really not very good, but they do have a
very good spicy chicken sandwich.
Yes, I know.

Speaker 2 (01:00:33):
I've heard.
We have to go.
When we go to McDonald's, hehas to go to Wendy's because he
likes whatever.
They're frosty, now they'remaking some fancy frosties with
like.
That's where.

Speaker 1 (01:00:48):
Yeah, that's not what you do.

Speaker 2 (01:00:49):
Just stop, just stop with that Right, you're fucking
fast food Right, move on.

Speaker 1 (01:00:54):
And you're right down the road from the Dairy Queen,
where I can go and get that.

Speaker 2 (01:00:57):
I'm not going there for this.
Just do what you do.
Yeah, stop trying to be fuckingfancy.

Speaker 1 (01:01:05):
I know.

Speaker 2 (01:01:06):
McDonald's Stop it.
Mcdonald's needs to get theirshit together.
I think they got rid of allthem coffee bars too.
I don't think they do that shitanymore.
First of all, I saw a meme theother day.
It's totally true.
What happened to McDonald's?
It aged with us Like when wewere kids.

Speaker 1 (01:01:23):
It was like this, really nice happy place and now
they all look like sad.
Yep, they're awful, they are.
They're awful and they takeforever.
Oh, my god, this whole go park.
While I make your food, likewhat the fuck?
Why aren't there 20cheeseburgers on the ready?
I?

Speaker 2 (01:01:36):
came here because I didn't want to be waited on yeah
, I want to get.
I don't need it fresh no I didnot come here for fresh food.
No, no, no, no, no, I want it.
I want it to be the days whereit was in the little slidey
things.
Yeah, and it would just in thestyrofoam.

Speaker 1 (01:01:52):
I mean, nothing makes me more angry than when I get a
McDonald's cheeseburger and thecheese doesn't melt.

Speaker 2 (01:01:56):
I don't know Like what are you talking about?
You know, what my favoritething in the whole wide world
used to be is when you wouldslide into McDonald's at 1028.
And you would look at theslidey thing and there would be
like two sandwiches left andyou'd be like these bitches in
front of me better not begetting my Egg McMuffin.

(01:02:17):
Because it's perfect.
And they would not make youanother one If it was 1030,.
You're not getting, unless it'sin the slidey thing.
You're not fucking getting it.
Fuck you.
Fuck your mom, yep, fuck yourwhole family.
You should have got here fiveminutes ago, exactly, and yet
when you have a restaurant andyou have a cutoff time of two
o'clock for your breakfast andpeople come in and want to argue
every time, I would say go toMcDonald's at 10, 29 and 59

(01:02:42):
seconds and see if you can get.
Yep, the person in front of youin the drive-thru can get
breakfast, and then that thinghits and no yeah, you are fucked
, but you have to have it thatway.

Speaker 1 (01:02:52):
Yeah, you can't have people in their hemming and
hawing like, well, you know, yougotta boom boom because you
don't shut down for thatchangeover no, but I like the
slidey things.

Speaker 2 (01:03:02):
I think we should bring back, yeah, the slidey, it
was just think we should bringback the slidey things.

Speaker 1 (01:03:05):
It was just ready, Like you put in your order.
They turned around, grabbed thebag, pulled down all the shit
you just ordered, stuck it inthe bag Now it takes six
forevers.

Speaker 2 (01:03:14):
I'm here for fast food, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:03:18):
And you don't know if you've been forgotten.

Speaker 2 (01:03:19):
I know.

Speaker 1 (01:03:20):
And you don't want to be that guy that goes in and is
like hello.

Speaker 2 (01:03:23):
But you also don't want to be that guy that goes in
and is like hello.
But you also don't want to sitthere and they've thrown your
food in the trash and theyforgot about you.

Speaker 1 (01:03:28):
It's too much.
It's too much it is.
It's become very stressful toget fast food oh my god.

Speaker 2 (01:03:38):
And door dashing at mcdonald's is the worst.
That's what my husband saysterrible they you are the last
thing on the planet.

Speaker 1 (01:03:46):
You will sit there forever.
Although, growing up inrestaurants as we did, I can't
say I would be any better.
Here's my thing about.
I would fucking hate that Iknow.

Speaker 2 (01:03:57):
I understand as a restaurant person restaurateur.
I get it, it makes total sense.
You have to evolve personrestaurateur.
I get it, it makes total sense.
It's probably one of the betterthings that has happened to
restaurants, especially smallbusinesses like that.
It is probably one of thebetter things.
However, you, if you're goingto participate in it, cannot and

(01:04:20):
I would have not, except in theoff season asked my servers or
my bartender to deal with it.
You have to have a specificperson.
Excellent point For that,because A they're not getting
tipped and I am, I don't care.
I am a firm believer that yourservers and bartenders should

(01:04:41):
get tipped the day of and theyshould walk out of there with
cash.

Speaker 1 (01:04:44):
It's the whole fucking point and they actually
work for tips.
Not every single person who canstick a jar on their counter.

Speaker 2 (01:04:51):
Tipped employees minimum wage is two dollars and
22 cents and it has been forever.
Um now, mind you, in the slowpart, if their tips plus their
223 does not equal minimum wage,you do have to boost them.
But whoever does that?

Speaker 1 (01:05:08):
and they hate that, yeah and wait staff don't even
pay attention, they're just likefuck it, I don't even care.
No, so when you're working atduncan and you're making 18 an
hour, I'm not going to tip you.
And it's not because I don'tappreciate your service.
You're getting paid 18 an hourto do that.
That's your job.
Yeah, like I, I I do getfrustrated because I did live on
tips for so long and I fuckinghustled to make tips.

(01:05:31):
Yeah, and now just everybodythinks they should get them yeah
, and even on the little ipadthings they swing it around.
No, I just bought a five dollarcoffee.
What do you want for me?

Speaker 2 (01:05:41):
yes, a quarter like what do you want, leave me alone
.
That's.
That's why, if I was doing doordash, I would have, I would
hire a specific person that gotpaid your minimum wage or
whatever.
Yeah, to do only get that shittogether or offer that to your
servers.

Speaker 1 (01:05:57):
You know, come in for 20 bucks an hour, you know, and
fill it in because it and itaffects the cooks too, because
now you have all this extra foodthat's on top of capacity in
the restaurant.

Speaker 2 (01:06:08):
You can shut it down, though I tried to get surf
bagel yesterday and it was shutdown.

Speaker 1 (01:06:13):
Okay, I have seen them shut down before and I
wasn't sure why.
Yeah, you can shut it off.

Speaker 2 (01:06:19):
I'm surprised any ever.

Speaker 1 (01:06:20):
Stay on, then.
Chefs must not have access tothat.

Speaker 2 (01:06:23):
When I worked at a place, that had it shut it down
a lot, oops first of all, Iwould, if you goes are bad
enough yeah those are anightmare.

Speaker 1 (01:06:35):
I can't even fucking fathom having to navigate.

Speaker 2 (01:06:37):
If you have, ever worked in a restaurant, then
ever, even for like 15 minutes,and but if you are one of us
that have worked in a restaurant, you're, you lived, ate,
breathe more than half your lifethe noise that the printer
makes in the kitchen will hauntyou until the day you die, and

(01:06:57):
sometimes I still wake up in themiddle of the night like
hearing it.
And so, when you know, when youknow there's a certain X amount
of people out in your diningroom, but yet your computer is
still rolling out shit.

Speaker 1 (01:07:15):
Imagine.
You know when that rush comesin, you know when your hostess
has sat too many people all atonce and fucked everything up.
That was why my mom was good.
Yes, and you know when you'vegot a handle on that.
You know when you're like allright, we've made it through, we
still have this to go, butwe're gonna be okay.
And then, without even havingmore tables open up, yeah you

(01:07:36):
got 10 orders, come in.

Speaker 2 (01:07:37):
Can you imagine I, I can, I.
My mom was brutal as a hostess.
She wasn't to you because youwere the bartender, but we had
this one waitress who hands down, absolutely, no doubt, in my
mind, the best waitress I haveever met.

(01:07:57):
In my entire life I've met alot of servers.
She was fucking amazing.
I will give her all.
I used to tell her all the timewe sat 124 people in our
restaurant in bethany and shecould take that entire dining
room herself.
Yep, my mom was.

(01:08:19):
She became our head waitressfor a little while and my mom
would just seat her and seat herand seat her and she would come
to my mom and when she gotweeded you could tell she was
weeded.
She would come to my mom.
She'd be like patty, I don'tknow if I could do it.
My mom would turn around.

Speaker 1 (01:08:30):
She's like, yeah, you can I could, you can do it and
she'd be like I.

Speaker 2 (01:08:34):
She would come in the kitchen.
She'd be like your mom is mymom, did not fuck around and
that is like a true, very true,like um um.

Speaker 1 (01:08:44):
Description of being a waitress, though, is like you
can't do.
It's like giving birth like youcan't do it, like I just can't
do this anymore.
Yeah, but you have to yeah,like yeah, there's no other
choice.
There are people waiting to eatand it's all on you it's a
terrible, it is a job I couldnever do.
It that's why I was always inthe kitchen.

(01:09:05):
I could never be a cook.

Speaker 2 (01:09:07):
It's so hot back there oh my god, it's so hot,
but you don't have to.

Speaker 1 (01:09:10):
You only have to deal with dumb waitresses and I was
gonna say I was best friendswith a cook so I knew how to
treat cooks.

Speaker 2 (01:09:16):
So I was not that kind of waitress.

Speaker 1 (01:09:18):
but I saw a lot of them come flying back there with
their trashy mouths where's myfood?
Blah, blah, blah.
I would just kind of stand backin the corner and just kind of
look, and they'd look out at meand be like what do you need?
Well, blah, blah, blah, okay.

Speaker 2 (01:09:37):
Gotta know how to cook.
If cooks have an ego, you gottalearn how to stroke it.

Speaker 1 (01:09:42):
If you really want to get along with your cooks,
bring them a fresh soda a coupletimes during their shift.
That's all they need.
That's really all it takes.
All they really is Just makethem.
You'll learn what they all like.
Put it up in the window.
They will snatch it up, drinkit, put it down and get back to
work and you probably won't getthanked.
But just do it, and then whenyou do need to ask where your

(01:10:09):
food is, it's not quite aspainful.

Speaker 2 (01:10:11):
No, okay, commercials .
Yes, not kitchen work.

Speaker 1 (01:10:14):
I think that was all of them.

Speaker 2 (01:10:16):
Yeah, yeah, I think we did oh one, oh, we did forget
to okay the clapper that one isjust so silly.

Speaker 1 (01:10:25):
I know it's so like clap on clap off, clap on, clap
off the clapper, and it was, youknow, people getting into bed
yeah, they were so happy, Iwanted one they didn't have to
turn their lamp off I wanted one.

Speaker 2 (01:10:40):
I never got one, but yeah, I did.

Speaker 1 (01:10:41):
I wanted my family to at least have one, like I
wanted one in the houseeverybody should have one.
Nobody ever had one, theclosest I ever got were the
lamps, where if you touched it,it would come on and it had
three different brightnesses,and then you would always skip
one and you'd be like god damnit.

Speaker 2 (01:10:55):
Yes you're a little aggressive with the touching um
nair.

Speaker 1 (01:10:59):
I forgot about nair, oh girls wear short, short nair
for short shorts if you darewear short shorts, nair, for
short shorts, that stuff stankand it burned holy shit and it
was.
There's no way that shit wasgood for you oh fuck, no, oh my

(01:11:20):
god, it was literally likesmearing acid all over your legs
.

Speaker 2 (01:11:24):
It was pretty much.
It didn't just take the hairoff, it probably took like the
first four layers of your skinoff with it.

Speaker 1 (01:11:29):
Which was helpful because it would keep your legs
smoother.

Speaker 2 (01:11:32):
A lot longer yeah, because it killed the root and
everything your body had tofigure out how to grow hair
again in those spots.

Speaker 1 (01:11:42):
It did smell awful.

Speaker 2 (01:11:44):
I had also the micromachines guy that used to
do the fast talk.
His name was josh machete jr,by the way, and he was again his
book of world records for thefastest talking.
Oh really.
And then one more that we, Ithink all, can relate to at this
point is the life alert.
I've fallen and I can't get up,because there have been times

(01:12:06):
where I've been laying on thefloor and thought I really don't
know if I can get up and if Ihad the little thing I could
alert them.

Speaker 1 (01:12:14):
Yeah, I think about it because I have a basement in
my house and it has very steepsteps and I've never been a good
steep step person, not thatI've ever fallen, it's just my
anxiety really.
But I've never been a goodsteep step person, not that I've
ever fallen, it's just myanxiety really.
But if I'm home alone, unless Ireally need to go down there
for something, I won't go downthere when I'm alone, because I
was like I'm going to fall andI'm going to snap my neck, I'm
going to lay at the bottom ofthe steps and I'm going to be

(01:12:37):
totally aware of everythinggoing on.
I won't be able to move.

Speaker 2 (01:12:45):
My cats will come start eating me.
Yes, they will, and there won'tbe anybody to save me.
Nope, so yeah, total life alert.
Big fan, big fan of the lifealert.

Speaker 1 (01:12:52):
Oh boy, all right, this got long for being a cash,
oh I thought it would end upbeing short and we just be like
oh well, it's just a villain.

Speaker 2 (01:12:59):
I did too, but we're at an hour and 12 minutes.

Speaker 1 (01:13:02):
Go us.

Speaker 2 (01:13:03):
Yay, so we're going to wrap it up.
Thank you for listening.
You can like share rate, reviewus.
You can find us where youlisten to podcasts.
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(01:13:24):
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