047 Are You Sacrificing Your Health For Work Life Balance?

Our society is sick, largely because we don't take good care of ourselves. 
Some of this is due to our work culture of "more is better". But what if, instead of trying to work more, we focus on increasing our value? 
How can we contribute more to others in such a way that allows us to take better care of ourselves? 
The right mindset can provide us with more opportunities...let's explore these ideas to help you Live All Your Life.

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Episode Transcript

Tali (00:00):
one of our clients is my mother.

(00:03):
my mom has worked so hard mywhole life.
She's always been busy.
She's always been working.
And that's kind of what she'sfamous for.
There was one particular daythat we were checking in with
her she said something like thisweek was just crazy and like the
wheels fell off and whatever.

(00:24):
And I.
I started to cry on the call.
Gosh, I, it was embarrassingbecause I didn't think she could
see me, but I guess as mymother, of course she would but
I got really emotional about itbecause it made me sad to think
that my mother's work wasstanding in the way of what she

(00:49):
wanted in that instance or inher life.
But of course, this is not theonly time we've ever heard this.
We've had many people, whetherthey're prospects or clients
that we currently have, or havehad in the past, where their
work life is so demanding thatthere are these huge sacrifices

(01:13):
that, could be really hard on afamily, or that could be really
hard on your body.
And so I wanted to talk aboutthat today because I think this
is an area of our business andof our coaching that we don't
want to shy away from

Cody (01:27):
I think it's even beyond work culture.
It's our society in general.
It's kind of odd because youhear a lot about self care now
self care self care self careBut As with most pop culture
terminology, it's very illdefined what does self care
mean?
And I think there's sort of anemphasis on self care in some

(01:47):
ways because nobody's takingcare of themselves.
I mean, just on a basic levelpeople don't take very good care
of themselves.
It's pretty apparent when youlook at society I'm Tali Zabari.

Tali (02:13):
Hi, I'm Cody Limbaugh.
Welcome to the Live All YourLife podcast.

Cody (02:35):
Hi, honey.
Hey, baby.
How's it going?
It's going great.

Tali (02:38):
I have an iceberg for today and it piggybacks off of
what we were just discussing,which is re certifying as
coaches.
is not.
A part of philosophy of fitness,but of course it has a way of
working itself into everyconversation we have.

(02:59):
So Cody and I are both up forre-certification through
CrossFit.
And I've been certified for alittle over 10 years.
How about you?

Cody (03:11):
My first certification was in 2004.
Okay.
And then CrossFit in 2007.

Tali (03:18):
Okay.
So I.
Wanted to ask what the story wasbehind Your first level one cert
because I know it's a good one.
And I think mine's pretty good,too

Cody (03:29):
The story you mean the gym?
Yeah peeps.
Yeah so Yeah back in Hmm.
Where do I start this story?
So if I started with nothing andwas like, you know, we had three
kids at home and kind of barelymaking ends meet.

(03:50):
I was working restaurant jobs,trying to get my first cert
through NASM.
And then fast forward a fewyears and I had been working for
Bally's Bally total fitness andthen went out on my own.
So everything was justbootstrapped and like we were
just barely making ends meet andI wanted to become a CrossFit
affiliate.
And in order to become aCrossFit branded gym, you have

(04:13):
to.
be certified first and thenthrough them.
And then you pay an additionalfee for the sort of, for the
affiliation.
And so it scraped and scrapedfor my level one and got it, but
I couldn't afford theaffiliation dues.
And so, yeah, I think I may havemisspoke that one time, but I

(04:36):
think I got myself to the levelone.
But it was just like a barely bythe skin of my teeth kind of
thing, making payments, callingCrossFit, like, Hey, can I pay
half now?
You know, that kind of thing.
And then got that, but wecouldn't affiliate still.
And so my members came togetherand they threw me a party and it
was, I think somebody's birthdayin the gym.

(04:57):
We did a lot of those kind oflike get together birthday
things.
And then they gave me a checkfor enough to cover the
affiliation dues.
No, I think I have that wrong.
No, that was the level one.
Yeah.
They paid for the level onebecause it's kind of another
cool part of the story I wasremembering.
So they paid for my level oneand I went and took it.
And then I was not an affiliateand I met Greg Glassman,

Tali (05:21):
right?
Yeah,

Cody (05:23):
I can't believe I forgot this.
Yeah.
So they paid for my, for mycert.
Then when I went and met GregGlassman at a, some kind of
conference, he asked me why Iwas not affiliated.
And I just sort of paused.
I didn't say anything.
I was just like, well and hegoes, is it the money?
And I go well, yeah, it's kindof tight right now.
And he called over and his, hisassistant and he gave me a

(05:45):
complimentary.
First year of my affiliation,he's like, you need to be an
affiliate because yeah, he and Iwere having some great exchanges
at the conference.
And so he set us up.
Yeah.
That rain is sudden.
I wonder if our windows are downanywhere.

Tali (06:06):
I know I rolled my window up and all the cats are inside.
So they just went out.
Oh, fuck.
Maybe not.
I love that story.
Every layer of it.
I think it's so great.

Cody (06:20):
Just the community coming together.
Yeah, that was cool.

Tali (06:23):
Maybe lightning can strike again because I just reached out
to CrossFit just now tellingthem that I don't think I'm
going to recertify.
It's just not great timing.
Not just financially, but thetravel I think is what makes it
really hard for me toconceptualize and it all has to
happen in a really short amountof time.
But.

(06:44):
My story isn't quite as great asyours, but it is meaningful.
I was lucky enough to receive, Ithink it was 5, 000 from a
deceased family member, andseveral people in the family
received this money, and it wasmeant to be for school.

(07:05):
So whether it went to like yourliving expenses, or your Books
or whatever, you know, 5, 000doesn't go that far when you're
talking about college.
And so I had it in my savingsaccount and I, I don't remember
what we decided it was going tobe for, but I remember really
wanting to become a CrossFitcoach.

(07:27):
And I was in my junior year ofcollege and without consulting
anybody, just one night I madeone of my many impulse purchases
of A thousand dollarscertification.
So that money was not meant tobe used for CrossFit coaching or

(07:48):
anything like that.
But that certification has givenme far more in return than my
degree that I got at the time.

Cody (07:58):
And it was education.

Tali (07:59):
It was, but think about like the time that was put into
it, you know or how much moneyin comparison.
Sorry, I just kicked you.
Anyway, thinking about thatstory, I'm like, Oh, maybe I
should recertify because it wasso meaningful, but I don't know.
I don't know.
Maybe I'm still on the fence.

Cody (08:19):
Yeah, it's a little hard to cough up a couple grand for
certifications when we've beendoing this for years and years
and The amount of takeawayknowledge we're going to get
from a weekend seminar is goingto be pretty minimal.

Tali (08:34):
But that's not really where it
ends.

Cody (08:36):
No, but that's my point.
That's all you get out of thatthousand, you know, 1100 bucks
each is just the weekend.
That's all you get from it.
You know, that's all you get forit.
So it's a little, it's kind of atough pill for me to swallow.

Tali (08:50):
Not maybe the first time around, you were mentioning the
other day that one of the proswas that to be eligible to work
in a CrossFit gym, you had tohave it, which was the case for
me.

Cody (09:02):
Yeah, it's a good place to start.
I just, after this, this is my19th year coaching.
I just feel like paying anotherthousand dollars to assert I've
already taken before and.
Many iterations of the firstlevel.
I don't know.
This doesn't seem very worth itto me.

Tali (09:20):
Well, I guess I'm still thinking about it.
Not really the topic of today'sconversation but I will tell one
more story that does introducetoday's topic.
So Cody and I, we've been doingsome remote coaching this year
and one of the things that weoffer as a part of our coaching
service is a weekly video callwith the both of us where we get

(09:43):
to discuss.
You know, how your trainingwent, what's going well, what's
not going well, what can weadjust moving forward?
And one of our clients is mymother.
And I love the work that we'vebeen doing with her so far.
Not only has she been benefitingand hopefully we'll get her on

(10:04):
the podcast so she can telleverybody herself, but I can
tell that she is.
Getting a lot out of it.
And you two are strengtheningyour relationship through this
process, which is meaningful forme to be watching.
And you know, I've been atrainer for years and it's taken
this long for my mom to kind oftake me up on my offer of being

(10:31):
a support to her.
So that's really cool.
And there was one particular daythat we were checking in with
her that even before we got on acall.
I remember just saying somethinglike, you know, my mom has
worked so hard my whole life.
She's always been busy.
She's always been working.

(10:53):
And that's kind of what she'sfamous for.
And when we got on the call, youknow, she said something like
this week was just crazy andlike the wheels fell off and
whatever.
And I.
I started to cry on the call.
Gosh, I, it was embarrassingbecause I didn't think she could

(11:15):
see me, but I guess as mymother, of course she would but
I got really emotional about itbecause it made me sad to think
that my mother's work wasstanding in the way of what she
wanted in that instance or inher life.

(11:36):
And she was very quick to saythat she wasn't suffering as a
result, you know, this issomething that she's chosen for
herself for her industry isreally there's an expectation
from the beginning that there'san element of self sacrifice and
that she has been okay withthat.

(12:00):
But of course, this is not theonly time we've ever heard this.
We've had many people, whetherthey're prospects or clients
that we currently have, or havehad in the past, where their
work life is so demanding thatthere are these huge sacrifices
that, you know, what wasreflected in that conversation

(12:21):
that was, you know, that couldbe really hard on a family, or
that could be really hard onyour body.
And so I wanted to talk aboutthat today because I think this
is an area of our business andof our coaching that we don't
want to shy away from becauseyou and I have been really well
aware of this concept and eventhough maybe our life doesn't

(12:42):
reflect it all the time, we'removing towards that finally.
And I think a really tangibleway.
So that was a lot to say, whydon't you respond, take

Cody (12:51):
a sip of coffee.
Well, this work culture, Isuppose is to sum up what we're
talking about here, but I thinkit's even beyond work culture.
It's our society in general.
It's kind of odd because youhear a lot about self care now
self care self care self careBut

Tali (13:10):
I actually met somebody the other day whose company like
allots them a self care houronce a week.
Oh,

Cody (13:16):
that's funny.
Yeah But that is very, as withmost pop culture terminology,
it's very ill defined what doesself care mean?
And I think there's sort of anemphasis on self care in some
ways because nobody's takingcare of themselves.
I mean, just on a basic levelpeople don't take very good care
of themselves.
It's pretty apparent when youlook at society where, you know,

(13:41):
over 70 percent of thepopulation of in America is
overweight, 70, over 70%.
And

Tali (13:50):
it's not a crazy judgment.
I'm probably considered part ofthat

Cody (13:54):
70%.
So yeah, there's not, you know,it's almost like we have to give
a disclaimer every time we talkabout anything these days, cause
it seems like there's like thisair of sensitivity and in the
world, certain things you're notsupposed to say or whatever, but
This is not a judgment call onany one person's ethics or their

(14:15):
beauty standards or theirworthiness as a person or love
or anything like that.
I'm just talking about healthand, and literally just taking
good care of yourself.
And if you look back in onvideos that are 50 or 60 years
old, And you look at a beach ora downtown scene in New York

(14:38):
city or something like that, 50,60 years ago, you don't see
hardly any person that'soverweight.
Hardly anyone is overweight.
And that's not a very long timeago.
You know, it'd be one thing ifit was some sort of evidence of
how our ancestors were orsomething like that.
But we're talking about like,Our grandparents, our
grandparents did not work livein a generation where young

(15:01):
people were overweight veryoften, you know, it was a very
small outlier of people and Soobviously some things have
changed in a dramatic way, and Idon't think it's as simple as
just to say it's one thing.
There's obviously a lot ofpolitics that have influenced
this in our culture because thecorn industry and the lobbying

(15:25):
that took place and the ideathat we should be on low fat
diets.
And somehow grains is like thefirst thing that we, the
foundation of our nutrition.
That's kind of a ridiculousnotion at this point.
But that was sold to theAmerican public as the food
pyramid.
And.
But that's just one thing and Idon't think it's just that one

(15:48):
thing.

Tali (15:48):
Well, we're talking about a different thing today, which

Cody (15:51):
is, we're culture.
Right.
Well, I was circling back tothat though.
It's like there's a culture nowof the idea that physical
activity, working out, takinggood care of your body is
something that you do ifeverything else in your life is
done.
It's like the last thing thatpeople do.

(16:12):
I used to be A little frustratedwhen I first entered this as an
industry, like as a profession,because when when economic
Issues would come up withclients, you know, firing their
personal trainers, like one ofthe first things they do.
And I used to think of myselfas, yeah, well, yeah, but I'm

(16:33):
talking about individuals liketheir priority list.
People's priority is like, well,that's not necessary.
Like the gym membership.
I can let that go.
And there's the great lie

Tali (16:43):
that we all tell ourselves that.
I can

Cody (16:45):
do this on my own.
Oh, yeah.
I can do this on my own.
And then like, how's that goingfor you?
The But I've really shifted mythinking on this because I used
to think, well, I'm in a luxurybusiness.
Like not everyone can affordwhat I have to offer and not
everyone can do this.
And I'm going to have the timeand the money.
And now that I'm a little moreexperienced and I've been around

(17:08):
and I just look around at oursociety and their list of
priorities, the way that weprioritize things, it's a very
important message for me to getout to people that this is not a
luxury business.
That if you don't have, ifyou're not fit, you need to get
help.
And if you, if you can't makethe changes on your own, you

(17:29):
need a coach.
And it's not a, you should get acoach.
I said you need a coach.
People talk about this all thetime for therapy and mental
health.
But if you are struggling withyour health, you know, whether
it's, you know, I see people intheir fifties getting like,
Starting to talk about shoulderreplacements and stuff and and

(17:53):
they're kind of like being puton hold or given medication or
take it easy or whatever untilthey're in their sixties and
then they get a new shoulder.
There's a different way tohandle that, and that is to, you
know, really learn and take careof your body.
And for some reason it's lookedat as some sort of luxury or
nice to have thing.
I think it's really thefoundation for being healthy in

(18:15):
every aspect of your life, yourrelationships, your mental
wellbeing.
We are not, we are not like somesoul walking around in a meat
sack.
That's just not how it works.
We are us, like we're in ourbody and our body, it really
affects everything we do.
In fact, including the way thatwe think that, you know, when

(18:35):
you.
There's just study after studyafter study to prove this, but
anyone who's experienced itknows that when you work out and
you're fit, you're also thinkingclearly.
You have more ambition to doother things in your life.
It's easier to eat healthy whenyou're active because when
you're active.
It makes you want to eathealthier instead of just

(18:57):
junking out cause you know howdrunk food makes you feel.
And it's just, it's like thisbig, big snowball effect that
when you start taking care ofyour body, a lot of other things
go right in your life.
So it's not a luxury.
It's not a nice to have.
People need to take this fuckingseriously.
And I'm, I'm really gettingriled up about it.
Not, not, not in this moment,but just like over the past few
months because of the statisticsthat I was talking about, like

(19:21):
It's not a joke anymore, like wecan't have something like COVID
come through and most of thepeople who died from COVID.
We're overweight and obviouslymost of our population is
overweight.
So there's like some correlationthere as far as the statistics
go.
But it was, it was obvious andstated very early on in the

(19:41):
pandemic that one of the mostdangerous comorbidities that you
could have that COVID wasextremely dangerous for elderly
people and overweight people.
If that didn't wake people up tothe importance of this, I don't
know what would, but it'sfrustrating for me to.
See a society that looks at thisas some sort of luxury that

(20:04):
getting in shape is justsomething that some, you know,
health nuts do or athletes, orit's just a certain part of the
population that should be doingthis.
Now, we all really need to takeour health seriously and make it
a priority.
And this ties into our subjecttoday.
I'm sorry to keep, well, itdoes, because we're talking
about work culture and part ofthe culture that.
It says that working out as aluxury is the idea that your job

(20:30):
comes first, above everything.
Your job comes before yourfamily, before your health,
before your sleep, beforeeverything.
It's the priority that you buildyour life around, and I'm not
convinced that that's ethicaland I'm not convinced that
that's really a natural thingeither.
I think this is a societal

Tali (20:48):
thing.
It's not, but it's also come tobe something that feels really
necessary for folks.
I mean, I haven't looked at...
A chart like this in a longtime, but I remember seeing
within the last 10 years, achart of the amount of time that
people are working and how thathas been increasing, like,
significantly since the 70s, butwages haven't you know, taking

(21:13):
inflation into account.
And so, you know, in order tokeep our lives afloat, there is
always this.
Pressure.
I need to work more.
I need to be doing more.
And that means that all thosethings that you were talking
about, our well being, ourhealth, our families, that all
gets pushed aside to the end.

(21:36):
And, you know, we, we don'tnecessarily have the answers for
this, but this is just somethingthat we keep bumping up against
in our personal life and ourprofessional life that I'm
really hoping more people becomeaware of.
Because it's really fucked.
Like, it's kind of funny to feelthis way about it because being

(21:59):
the daughter of a workaholic Ialways saw myself doing the same
thing.
I started doing the same thingvery early in life, you know,
working 60 hour weeks.
I was really proud of that.
I thought that's how you gotahead.
I thought that that's what arich life was like.
And Honestly, I think I couldhave kept going if it wasn't for

(22:23):
you you have a really differentset of values around that.
And I think I would have beenreally happy moving forward in
that way, but there would havebeen a cost.
There would have been somethingthat I would have had to give it
a give up.
And so, you know, what I'mhoping to really.

(22:46):
Breakdown today is like how thatbecomes normalized and what are
some things that we can thinkabout to dismantle that because
it's so deeply ingrained thatmore is more is more.
And the thing about ourworkplace is like they are
designed, it's like very archaicat this point, but like they're

(23:07):
designed to reinforce, you know,working more.
You know we get a pat on theback or a pay raise or whatever
when we are investing more andit's not necessarily just
quality based, but just how muchmore are you putting into it?
All of your energy, all of yourtime.

(23:28):
Yeah,

Cody (23:29):
yeah, that's one thing when it's a passion.
If somebody are, you know, isfollowing some calling that they
have in their life to devotelong hours, you know, I don't
think that.
Okay.
Okay.
We're saying that that kind ofcommitment is not a good thing,
but that's not most people.
Most people have jobs that theytolerate at best, and many have

(23:49):
jobs that they fucking hate.
But they just do because they,they have to pay the bills,

Tali (23:53):
you know, and also it's not maybe meant to be a state of
being forever, you know, maybe,you know, my mom also got her
PhD.
And so I saw what that processwas like.
And so she had to just push.
Extra hard for an, a handful ofyears and then it's kind of

(24:15):
like, okay, I get to apply this,whatever, but it's It ought not
be expected to maintain thathigh level of functioning all
the time, you know, we talkabout seasons.
We talk about trainingperiodization all the time as
really important things toimplement in our lives.
And unfortunately, when it comesto our jobs, I, you know, I

(24:37):
think nine to fives that if thatis going to be that many hours a
day, you know, I think nine Tillyou're 65 or whatever the, the,
the going age is that's a lot oftime missed.

(24:57):
Mm-hmm.
elsewhere.
And I guess maybe it's easy forme to say that because I am in
my first week.
Being out of my nine to five intwo years.
So that's pretty cool.
Yes.
But it was not easy to get here.
And it's not just saying itwasn't easy to get here because
of all the logistics, like, youknow, making up the financial

(25:20):
deficit that it would have been.
I have a lot of like guiltaround it, you know, leaving
work the last two days at 2 PM.
I felt bad.
About it.
I knew that if I stayed longermy co workers Workload would
have been easier.
I know that I would have beenlike another helping hand and

(25:46):
That's really hard.
That's like a part of thisconversation though is like
there's just that expectation orthere's this Pavlovian response
to like Being asked to work morelike I would always say yes when
people ask me to cover Theirshifts or like when I worked at
the restaurant when we firstmoved here I could just tell

(26:07):
they were struggling and so Iwas like I can work another day
You know, it might not have beenin my best interest, but it was
in their best interest Yeah.
And that's, that's the difficultpart.
You know, I really started tofeel that being away eight hours
a day and you and I became likepassing ships and all of my best
energy was being given to otherpeople than my partner.

(26:31):
It made me really sad.
And I'm going to assume that'shappening everywhere.

Cody (26:40):
It could be pretty widespread, but I think a lot of
people try to numb out to itbecause they don't think they
have a choice.
For sure.
You know, and I think that oneof the problems that we have
with work culture is not so muchthe idea that you, you know,
shouldn't give a lot to yourwork or to your job.

(27:01):
I think part of the problemthough, is that people.
are not generally taught how toincrease their value.
So rather than increase theirvalue, they increase their work,
right?
And so let's work more.
Let's work harder.
Let's work longer hours.
Let's take a second job.
More, more, more, more, more.

Tali (27:20):
Even though there's so many studies that support if you
condense that time, thatefficiency, productivity, and
all of that goes up.

Cody (27:30):
Yeah, but people don't.
Think about that.
They just see that.
Well, I'm making this much perhour Therefore I need to work
this many more hours to get thisbill paid or whatever Instead of
thinking how can I increase myvalue my contribution to the
world so that I can Demand ahigher price for my life, you

(27:53):
know, for the life I'm giving,because that's what you're
doing.
People don't maybe think of itin these terms, but you are
giving your life to whateveryou're spending time on.
Cause that's all you have inthis life is time.
And so it really should besomething that's great, you
know.
And I think there's just so manyinstances of people who want to
add and add and add instead ofthinking about how they can

(28:17):
deepen, deepen,

Tali (28:19):
like a difference between like expanding and deepening.
Yeah.
It's like a different

Cody (28:23):
depth.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So I think that's a cool way tothink of it.
That's one of the things that Ithink is the problem with our
work culture is that And it'sprobably not just work, it
probably goes to a lot of theways that we just think in our
society, is that more equalsbetter.
Whether it's more hours, moretime on the job, more cars,

(28:45):
more...
That's a huge myth too.
Yeah, more of whatever, if it'sworking, then more must work
more.
And There might be a way tostrategize so that less is
better so that less is more sothat you can thrive in other
ways like
It's

Tali (29:04):
not intuitive And

Cody (29:07):
even if you go into a deeper level rather than just
think of like how can I increasemy contribution or my value?
You can also think of like wellif I scaled back so that I'm
getting an extra hour of sleepmore than I've been getting For
the last, you know 10 years.
I start working out and So I'mactually working less, but if

(29:27):
you are healthier, if you arewell rested and fit, then you
can safely assume that you'dhave the ability to contribute a
higher value to your work thanjust putting in more hours
depends on what the job is, ofcourse, but like if you're in a
job where that doesn't matter,maybe That's another

(29:48):
conversation to try to look at ahigher value job for yourself or
business.
I kind of this isn't to shit onit,

Tali (29:56):
you can like add more value to yourself, you know,
whether that's education orexperience or whatever
relationship, yeah, that's goingto allow you to take a different
direction that might serve youbetter.
I mean, it, it's still going tobe work, you know, these are not
simple Yeah,

Cody (30:20):
and I feel like a lot of these ways of thinking are Like
I said, this is a really complexissue as far as all these
societal things.
That's not just like the cornindustry that fucked us over.
There's like lots of differentthings, but part of the
industrial age too, is if youthink about what that meant, if
people were coming off of farmsand going into factories and

(30:43):
think about how a factoryoperates, you know, if you are
on an assembly line and you'reputting a widget on this box.
And the only way to increaseyour value is to do more
widgets.
There's no change.
You're not going to changeanything.
Until, unless you're somebodywho can invent a machine to put
the widgets on, you know, thenall of a sudden you've increased

(31:05):
your value, your contribution.
But there's, I think, a mindsetthat's very deeply ingrained in
our Western culture of tradingdollars for hours and trading.
You know, time for money or acertain action for money, and
then to make more money, youjust need more of that.
You need to do more hours, more,more time, more widgets.

Tali (31:27):
Just leads to burnout, don't it?
Like that you can guarantee.

Cody (31:31):
So, but I don't think it applies anymore.
That's the thing is we're notreally in the industrial age
anymore.
We are in the information age.
We're in the who knows what agenow.
AI and all the craziness that'shappening.
But I think we really need toshift our mindset of how can I
contribute more to the world?
How can I increase my valuerather than adding the time that
I'm putting in?

(31:52):
Because we have this assemblyline attitude that's been
ingrained for a few generations.

Tali (31:58):
Well, so let's take that idea and let's apply it to our
own business.
I think we should workshop this.
Sure.
So how does this apply to whatwe were talking about earlier
when it comes to ourcertifications?

Cody (32:13):
Well, I don't see the certification as adding any
value.
That's why I'm having a hardtime paying for it because to me
it's almost like an ego thing.
Like, Ooh, I got this level too.
I can put this little thing upon my wall and look at the
certification.
I just went to, aren't I cool?
And, and they're fun.
I mean, I'll admit like everysort of been to, I've They're a

(32:33):
total kick.
I love being there.
I love being in a learningenvironment.
I like seeing the light bulbcome on for other people, but
it's up in there done that foryou.
Yeah.
And I, and I'm not to say that Iwouldn't learn anything cause of
course I would.
You're surrounded by a room fullof coaches or want to be coaches
and a staff of five or sixinstructors who have, who are

(32:55):
really fucking good.
Like their instructors arereally, really good.

Tali (32:58):
If Todd Winman's doing this one, then I would be,

Cody (33:00):
you might just need to go to flirt.

Tali (33:04):
But I'm just saying it would turn the table a little
bit or a tip the scale

Cody (33:08):
a bit.
Yeah.
So it's not that there's novalue there.
I just don't see how it's goingto contribute to any change in
our business

Tali (33:17):
whatsoever.
A good point.
So you've done thatcertification already.
I have not done my certificationthat I've been done the level
two yet.
And so I feel like that couldadd depth to.
My current coaching abilities.
However, I've had.

(33:39):
A lot of incredible experienceand wins with lots of clients
over 10 years with having justdone the level one cert and
then, you know, some littlethings here and there and then
being certified through USAweightlifting.
But I can't say that I attributeall the success that I've had to

(34:03):
those certifications.
No, they opened doors becauseof.
Necessary qualifications to doX, Y, or Z, but that isn't, you
know, how I've taught people to,you know, push through
challenges or to rise to theoccasion or to, you know trust

(34:28):
in the capabilities of theirbodies like that was not
anything that was everexplicitly taught It was through
the experience of coaching rightthat I really learned the things
that I find to be most valuableRight the

Cody (34:39):
deeper most important things are not taught in the
cert and even even your abilityto cue people into a good
position Which cert?
Right.
Covers.
You've all, you've also come upwith your own language around
that, your own methods aroundthat.
The experience of coaching hasmade you a better coach far more
than any weekend certificationpossibly could.

Tali (35:00):
Right.
Yeah.
It's tricky to think about howto add value because like you
said, we're in a different age.
It's not the industrial agewhere more is more.
How do we add value?
To our coaching, and it's reallytempting to just be like, Oh,
get more clients, get moreclients.
But then we just find ourselvesinto another job.

(35:23):
So what you think?
I mean, I've really asked myselfthis question.
I wrote it down because it'sgenius.
I'm going to put it.
On my desk where I could see itall the time because it's not an
obvious answer, but it'ssomething that I'd like to
ponder.
I'm going to assume that youhave already for

Cody (35:41):
the increasing my value.
Yeah.
So I'll give an example.
Of a recent consolidation thatwe did in our business and some
of my clients might be listeningto this.
So you know, you are so Istarted coaching some people one

(36:02):
on one and two on ones mostlymarried couples that I would
train two on one.
So married couple comes in, theytrain together and they're
getting a certain amount ofvalue out of that exchange based
on.
I think one of the highestvalues that a coach has is the
accountability factor.
You know, if, if you have anappointment that you're paying

(36:24):
for and you, you already paidfor it, you're going to, you're
way more likely to show up andjust showing up as most of being
fit, just showing up for it.
So I'm providing accountabilityand I'm providing knowledge
because I've nerded out on thisstuff for 19 years now and have

(36:44):
experience and have seen peoplemove well and not well, and I've
seen people get results and notget results enough that I.
can provide a lot of guidance topeople coming in.
So they're, they're getting myknowledge.
And what else?
We're building a relationshiptogether.
So I'm just trying to think ofall the ways that we're creating
value for that hour.

(37:04):
Well, recently my, my schedulewas filling up to, to more hours
than I really want to coach.
And this goes back to thequality over quantity thing too,
because I could coach and I havecoached in the past seven
sessions a day, easy, like threein the morning, one at noon,

(37:26):
three in the evening.
You're there for like 17 hoursand you're coaching seven of
them.
I've done that before and I'lltell you that it led to burnout.
Long term, it led to burnout.
But even on that day, I'm surethe last class was not getting
the same me as like the secondclass.
The second class was like asweet spot.

(37:47):
You get warmed up with the firstclass, and then the second class
gets the best coach.
And then the last class gets theThe last class is like, yeah, I
know you don't want to be here.
I kind of don't either.
Let's just go, you know, like,and so I want to keep my
coaching hours very short andhigh value by keeping high
energy and that kind of thing.
So anyway, I was starting to getto the point where like, I think

(38:09):
three back to back sessions inthe morning is kind of my limit
because when you're, if you'renot into coaching, you, you may
not.
Realize this, but there's a lotof energy output as a coach
because you're not only, like Isaid, you're, you're the
accountability guy and trying toreally offload knowledge, but
you're the hype guy.
Yeah.
You're also trying to make surethat people are being led

(38:29):
through at a proper pace and,and there's an energy about it
and there's a bit of aperformative aspect to it and
that I don't mean to beinauthentic cause it's not that
people are not getting the realme.
I'm the real me all the time.
I strive to be, but there is abit of a performative nature and
that I'm trying to put someenergy into that hour so that
they're having the bestexperience that they can.

(38:51):
And so after three hours,

Tali (38:53):
that is so important, by the way, seen coaches who don't
do that

Cody (38:55):
at all.
Oh yeah.
What a drag.
I've seen coaches that look tothe side and yawn as their
client is like doing reps andI'm like, Oh, you poor thing
coaches sitting

Tali (39:05):
down before

Cody (39:08):
So anyway, I'm getting a little rambly, but to increase
my value, I kind of.
I think the next step for me wasto be able to maintain my
energy, but serve more people.
So we consolidated a few ofthose couples and a couple of
individuals and that kind ofthing all into one class.

(39:30):
And so now.
Tim, in my opinion, I'veincreased my value.
Some people look at that as adecrease because, Oh, you're not
getting the one on oneattention, but let me tell you
in an hour of coaching, ifyou're one on one with somebody,
the total time that you actuallyneed that coach to be watching
your movement is probably like15 minutes max.

(39:51):
The rest of the time you'reresting between sets, you're
talking about how to log things,you're talking about you're,
you're demonstrating things.
You're, there's lots of stuffthat happens in that hour
besides just correcting form.
Well, there is a

Tali (40:03):
sweet spot because if you were to sir, you know, From one
people to a group of six, andthen onto a group of 20, there
is going to be a tipping pointwhere you are spreading yourself
thin and that quality might notbe there.
I also feel like six is

Cody (40:18):
a sweet spot.
But I think that with sixpeople, they're getting as much
individual attention as theywould on a one on one.
It's just not all, it's justspread out a little differently.
And so I don't think there's anydiminishment in the service that
they were getting, but nowthere's an added value of
greater energy in the room.
I mean, people work harder,whether you want to admit it or

(40:41):
not, whoever you are listening,you work harder in a group than
you do by yourself.
Period.
Like, I've never seen anexception to this.
You get in a group of otherpeople who are working hard.
You're not going to be like.
The person who's dogging it inthe room, you know, and if you
are, then it's probably evenworse on a one on one.
So there's always a greaterenergy in the room and there's

(41:03):
a, a depth of relationshipthat's possible in getting that
group together.
There's this camaraderie and itstarts to become this thing
where these are my people, youknow, this, and this is
something culture.
It's creating culture to dothat.
And this has been a topic that'sbeen around in CrossFit circles
for 15, 20 years now, like sincethe earlier days is that one of

(41:26):
the reasons why CrossFit tookoff one of the many reasons,
there's lots of cool thingsabout it, but One of the reasons
CrossFit took off the way it didis because it became people's
third place.
People talk about a third place.
Like Starbucks.
And third place used to bechurch for a lot of people.
Oh.
No, I'm talking about intimate,like, friendships, like,

(41:48):
culture.
But that was something

Tali (41:49):
that I heard about Starbucks.
Like that, that you wanted to bethe

Cody (41:52):
third place to be.
Yeah, that's, that's justmarketing, I think.
Because, like, what's, what is,like, I don't know, you get to
know your barista, but.
It's not like you meet the samepeople there every day.
I don't know,

Tali (42:01):
I've had so many meetings, so many meetups.
Oh yeah.
At Starbucks.
I mean, have you met my dad?
But I don't

Cody (42:06):
think that's the third.
He loves Starbucks.
Like the third place was someplace you went to regularly and,
and, and you created sort oflike a second, second family
situation.
I get it.
And.
So by putting people in a classsituation where they're
struggling they're working hard,they're overcoming challenges.

(42:26):
All these things have beenproven to, you know, greatly
enhance relationships when youovercome things together.
This is

Tali (42:33):
why I always drag my friends to the gym.
Like I feel like I get to knowthem on a very human level.
Because I see them learningthings.
I see them trying things, facingfears, facing fears and failing
triumphs, all of it, like youget to see people in a really
real way that I deeplyappreciate.

(42:55):
And you don't get that in everyscenario, you know, at work,
we're all trying to be buttonedup and like, not say the wrong
thing.
And, you know, not get introuble or whatever.
But the gym is a really uniquespace.
Mm hmm.

Cody (43:10):
Yeah.
And I think just to circle backaround, you were asking about
this like process of increasingvalue.
That to me was a way ofincreasing value.
So not only did it free up someof my time where I can
consolidate some of my hoursinto a single hour.
It is a higher value experiencefor them.
They can each pay less, butbecause of the way the math

(43:33):
works out, even though they'reeach paying less, I'm making
more for that hour.
But I, yeah.
I feel good about making morebecause like I said, I believe
it's a higher value experience.
They're getting that third placeexperience.
They're getting the depth ofrelationships.
They're getting faster knowledgeeven like, because if one person

(43:54):
has a question, the person nextto them was like, Oh, I didn't
even think about that.
That's like, you know, you seemore of those epiphanies happen
in a small group environmentlike that.
So that's one example ofincreasing the value.
To take it to another level, youknow, you and I are developing
online workshop type programsthat could reach thousands and

(44:16):
thousands of people.
So we're increasing our value bybeing able to touch more lives,
but without spending you know,17 hour work days in order to

Tali (44:26):
do it.
So many in the day.
Yeah.
And I think it's important tonote that even as an
entrepreneur business owner,even though it's not a quote
unquote job of another employer,nine to five, you can still
experience these pitfalls.

Cody (44:46):
And I feel like self imposed guilt.

Tali (44:48):
Absolutely.
And I feel like you and I arereally paying attention to that.
As we're in this transition,like how cool that you are
consolidating these classes inthe time that I've been able to
pull back, you know, there's alot that we want to do in our
lives.
And we've got lots of projectsand things that need attention

(45:09):
other than work.
And I very quickly notice thatthat time can evaporate so
quickly, especially in thepursuit of.
You know, being more financiallywell off or being able to, you
know, it's money is definitely amotivator, but like when we are

(45:29):
serving people in the gym andthey're having a great time, my
immediate response is like, wehave to give them more, we have
to offer more classes, we haveto be able to serve everybody at
every hour of the day becausesome people can't come to our 7
a.
m.
Class 6 p.
m.
Class, whatever.
And I think it's super.

(45:50):
Noble to want to serveeverybody, but I also know what
it's like to, you know,sacrifice your own well being,
your own life.
And if you don't do it smart,then it doesn't necessarily have
that if you're not thoughtfulabout the process in which
you're creating thesestructures, then you might be

(46:14):
giving more than you're

Cody (46:15):
getting.
And altruism can be a stickyphilosophy, really, because it
seems like always the noble way.
But.
I hear such mixed.
If you start to self sacrifice,then people are getting a lesser
version of you.
Like in this scenario, if wewere to offer more and more
class times, more and more justto try to accommodate people,

(46:37):
then people would get a burntout, drug out, tired version of
us.
And I even fell into the trap inmy, Previous gym life of being
the coach who never fuckingworked out.
I was not working out becauseyeah, because I was getting up
at 4 30 in the morning,commuting 20 minutes to my gym,
coaching the early morningclasses.

(46:59):
I'd be there all damn day.
And after the last class.
Sometimes at eight, eight 30 atnight, then I'd get to mop the
floors, you know, and it's like,holy shit.
You know, you can't, you can'texpect the people who are coming
in the next day to get a goodversion of me after working days
like that.
And so you also, even on analtruistic way, you have to
think, well, how can I givepeople my best?

(47:21):
How can, how can we provide thebest experience to the people
who can show up?
And for the people who can't,maybe we can offer some guidance
on other resources or something.

Tali (47:31):
Totally.
And energy expenditure, I thinkis just an easy thing to point
to because it's such a.
Keystone to our quality of life.
And I know that that's somethingyou struggle with.
I struggle with, you know, youhave a time that you crash each
day and I have a really hardtime waking up each day.

(47:53):
And I, I think something thathas been kind of plugging me in
my own personal life lately isfeeling like I have a lot of
family that I can't seem to keepin touch with everybody.
And this isn't like, family.
This is like my immediatefamily.

(48:13):
I have a surplus of parents.
That's for sure.
But yeah, like I have a standingappointment when I talk to my
mom once a week.
And then with my dad's, it'sjust kind of like, whenever
somebody feels like calling andIt's something that I have to,
like, put on a schedule to makehappen.
I don't have boatloads of freetime to just, like, shoot the

(48:36):
shit.
Or just even, like, catch up andsay hi.
And it feels terrible.
And the excuse is always thatI'm busy.
And that makes me really sad.
Like, I'm glad to beexperiencing the sadness because
it's making me motivated tobuild my life in a certain way
that doesn't make it so.
Yeah,

Cody (48:55):
for sure.
Yeah.
What you just said is the keythat I really want to
communicate to everybody whenthey say, oh, I can't make that
class time.
I can't make this happen.
I can't be consistent.
I don't have time to work outthree or four times a week,
whatever.
I'm not saying that those areexcuses.
Those are legit reasons.
I get it.

(49:16):
My message that I want to putout into the world is that if
you are so busy because of yourjob, whatever you want to call
it, your business that you areunable to do something like work
out three hours a week.
It's not a matter of finding abetter workout, a better way to

(49:37):
get fit, a way to squeeze it ina more efficient thing.
That's not what you need to do.
You need to change yourlifestyle to allow yourself some
time to take care of yourselfand people look at.
As an optional thing, and it'slike, well, somehow you managed
to eat, somehow you managed tobreathe, your heart is beating,

(49:57):
you poop, you eat, you sleep,right?
Those things.
It's like your body has a reallyimmediate.
reaction to not doing thosethings.
You can only hold your breathfor a few minutes at tops.
You can only go without waterfor a few days tops.
You can go years without workingout, but it is just as
necessary.
It is just as fundamental toyour body.

(50:19):
And you being a human is to beable to move well and continue
to move well as long as you canin this life.
And if your job is in the wayyou know, I just.
This is a really strong message.
I want to get out to people likeit's not the workout.
That's the problem.
You need to change.
You need to get the time off ofwork.

(50:39):
You need to change your job.
I mean, that sounds dramatic.
But if you can't work out,change your fucking job.
You have to change somethingbecause in 20 years.
You will be struggling.
You will be getting yourartificial joints or you'll be
getting diabetic, diabeticmedication.
You'll, you'll be on five drugs.
You'll be going to, you're goingto pay for it now or later.

(51:01):
And it's a much more pleasantexperience to stay fit.
Yes.

Tali (51:05):
If you're worried about the money, put the money in now
as opposed to when you have topay for

Cody (51:10):
medical bills.
Yeah.
Pay 200, 200 or 300 bucks amonth for good coaching and
carve five hours a week.
Or not even

Tali (51:17):
coaching.
There's so many online programs.
There

Cody (51:20):
are.
But you need some accountabilitytoo.
Like you need somebody to holdyour.
hand to the fire until it's alifestyle

Tali (51:28):
that is affordable.

Cody (51:29):
It's really not.
Yeah.
I'm just saying, I'm just sayingit has to be a priority.
People spend that much onStarbucks every month.

Tali (51:37):
Yeah, you definitely can put yourself on a budget.
You can definitely see, youknow, it takes some research to
find the right situation foryou.
Cody and I have kind of twotiers of services.
Those.
Those one on ones, those two onones, those are higher end.
And then the group rates aremuch more affordable as we, as

(51:59):
we mentioned.
And

Cody (52:00):
even if you don't have a coach, you know, like.
Put together a co op of your ownpeople, you know, maybe you have
two friends that want to get inshape with you.
Go in and say, okay, we're goingto each chip in 20 bucks a
month.
And then if we each chip in 20bucks a month, we'll buy a set
of dumbbells.
And then the next month we buythis or whatever, and start

(52:20):
building your own garage gym andhave those buddies.
And they're like invested, havesome skin in the game so that
there's some accountability.
I sincerely

Tali (52:28):
hope that you and I get on a level with our coaching that
we don't.
Shy away from this topic withour clients and that we are okay
with being more straightforwardabout like.
Look at your life, please.
And is this really serving yourneeds right now?
Like physically, obviously,we're, we're athletic coaches.

(52:48):
So that's the, that's themotivation for us, or at least
that's the expertise that wehave that people are seeking
out.
And, you know, I would never,I've never said this to my
mother, but maybe because I'm,we're recording on the podcast
now, it's easier for me to say,love you, mom.
But, yeah.

(53:09):
I mean, I could be incrediblynaive for assuming this, but,
you know, she's a very highlevel executive.
If she wanted to cut back ormake room for this part of her
life, I think she could.
I think...

(53:30):
My theory is that she probablyexperiences what I experience.
You know, the job that I'mtalking about, that I'm leaving
early every day.
This is not like a hospital.
This is not like a make it orbreak it, changing lives,
changing the world.
You know, one jar of skin careat a time.
But there's such an identitythat we hold.

(53:53):
To our professions, and that'sthe same conflict that I have
with the CrossFit coachingcertification.
I have been a certified CrossFitcoach for the last 10 years, and
to not be so sounds weird.
It feels like I'm taking a partof my identity away by not

(54:15):
reinvesting, and that's kind ofthe brilliance of it, right?
You can make it a reallyexpensive product that, you
know, is valuable, but like.
1, 000, you know, 1, 000 forlike two days.
Yeah, I don't know.
We could break that down and seeif it's really necessary.
But you know.

(54:38):
There was a time where I neededto recertify and I couldn't
afford it and I was just like,man, it would be really great if
there was like, some help that Icould get because this is my
livelihood.
Like, this is something thatI've being told that I need to
have for my job, but my jobdoesn't pay me enough to keep
this going.
There's a lot of like,mismatches there.

(55:01):
Like, there's a lot of kind oflike that irony that we were
talking about with you being.
And so when we were talkingabout looking at our lives, and
if our job is preventing us frombeing healthy people, that is an
inherently broken system.

(55:22):
That's a really hard place tobuild from.
And I think it's okay if we haveclients who are like, yeah, I'm
not going to do that.
I think that's fine.
But I don't necessarily want tofeel like I have to shy away
from pointing that out.
Yeah.
Because...
It's obvious, but it's somethingthat a lot of us don't want to
look at.
Maybe it's not obvious But likeyou like you said there are

(55:45):
people who are gonna be who arestuck in jobs for years that are
incredibly unfulfilling Orthey're still living paycheck to
paycheck.
I've been one of those peoplekind of one of those people And
it's really hard to see a wayout.
It's really hard to see a wayout and our job is not to Rub
your nose in it But our job isto advocate for your health.

Cody (56:08):
Yeah.
I'm not trying to shame anyone.
I've struggled, I've struggled alot in my life with all of these
issues.
And that's one reason I'm sopassionate about it, I think, is
that, you know, I've kind ofmade decisions that I'm not
going to do that.
I'm not going to do thatanymore.

And Transcribed by https (56:24):
otter.
ai So I just kind of want tolike shake people a little, like
grab them by the shoulders andshake them a little and say
like, like, look, you have, youhave choice, you know, you have
choice in this life.
And I realized that some peoplefeel like they don't have choice
and they come from differentplaces.
You know, I want to be sensitiveto the fact that we're all not
all starting at the same placein life and we don't all have

(56:44):
the same privileges, but even

Tali (56:46):
you and I are an example of that.
You know?

Cody (56:55):
But we've had help from time to time and sometimes
people don't have help at all.
And so, you know, I'm, I'msensitive to that, but I also
don't respect the defeatistattitude of, well, this is how
it is.
This is my life.
This is who I am.
The kind of statements to me isjust like giving up autonomy,
giving up any responsibility.

(57:18):
And so I just, I kind of want totalk tough about this a little
bit, you know, because I was upwith insomnia pretty bad, a
couple of weeks back and.
I was a little stoned, but Ijust kept getting up over and
over and writing notes aboutthis and realizing that this is
a big deal.
This is, it's hard to have theconversation with one person,

(57:40):
you know, a prospect or a clientwho's saying, Oh, you know, I
don't think I can make this workbecause my kids is.
Soccer schedule, my job scheduleand this schedule, like all
these conflict to the point.
So I can't work out it's, it'shard to have that conversation
with that one person, but Ithink it's necessary because if
you zoom out again, like Istarted this podcast with, we

(58:01):
have a crisis in our society.
We have a sick society.
Like our culture in the West issick and it's not because of.
Circumstances, it's because oflifestyle choices and so I don't
want to tolerate.
You know, while, while beingsensitive to the fact that not

(58:23):
everybody has the same resourcesand all that, I also don't want
to tolerate the no win scenarioof, well, this is my job.
This is, I have to do this.
I've got the kids that got it.
It's like, well, let's, let's,let's look and see how you can
increase your value so that youcan decrease your time
commitment so that you can starttaking care of yourself.
And it's not a, it's like achicken or the egg kind of

(58:44):
thing, because if you actuallydid cut back and you actually
did it.
Spend more time getting as fitas you can following some
intellectual pursuits growingin, in practicing, you know,
building your mind and yourspiritual life and your
relationships.
That makes you a more valuableperson for the hours that you
are giving away or selling.

(59:05):
Yeah.

Tali (59:05):
It's like filling your cup.
You got to have it run onsomething.
Yeah.
Yeah, those kind of dead endstatements of like, I don't have
enough time.
Can't, I won't, I am, whatever Ithink what's problematic about
statements like those is thatthey are not open to

(59:26):
possibility, right?
And without possibility, therest of your life is determined
for you.
You know what that road lookslike.
And that is not as good as like,I don't want to use words like
it's a waste, but it's, there'sso much more to our lives than
that.
There's so much possibility.

(59:47):
A defeatist attitude cuts youoff from all of that.
And that is what I find to be sobrilliant about being in
athletics is that you learn whatyou're capable of.
And it's.
Amazing.
There's a, I've had a fewmoments in the last few weeks

(01:00:07):
being like, man, am I in theright place?
Like doing this all over again?
Because as you know, I've had alot of struggle with you know,
flaky clients or, you know,things of that nature that are
kind of easy for me to attributeto like my value as a coach.
And like, am I in the rightplace?

(01:00:28):
Am I doing the right things?
It's easy for me to kind ofspiral when those things happen,
and I was wondering, like, youknow, am I in the right?
Industry.
Like, there's so many otherthings I could be doing.
And one thing that alwaysvalidates that choice is that

(01:00:50):
it's going to put me in a placewhere my body is moving all the
time.
And as somebody who was notactive for a lot of their life,
I almost feel like this is mycurriculum.
This is like, it's not that Ijust hire a coach.
I had to make it my damn job to.
be a coach to be active.

Cody (01:01:09):
Yeah.
Same

Tali (01:01:10):
with me.
Just all.
Y'all could be a coach.
And he's fitness if you reallywant

Cody (01:01:15):
to be, yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, when I ultimatelyaccountability, right?
Yeah.
It's the same story for me.
I was so out of shape all mylife that I got a free pass on P
E.
I was like, The kid who threw upso many times that eventually
the teacher was just like youcan just sit it out.
All this past you watch andyou'll get an a, you know, like

(01:01:37):
whatever and I had to become acoach in order to like get the
lifestyle necessary.
I thought to get the lifestylenecessary to take care of my
body I wanted the knowledge andthen I figured if I'm in the
gym, I'll, you know, I'll bepracticing what I preach and
that kind of thing.
And then I got so out of balancethat still, I still wasn't

(01:01:57):
working out.

Tali (01:01:58):
Oh yeah.
It's not like a guarantee

Cody (01:01:59):
by any means.
It's not magic.
It's just cause you have theknowledge.
But that's

Tali (01:02:03):
because of this conversation, like there is a
tipping point where the giving,giving, giving.
Doesn't like there's nothing forus left, right?
Yeah, and to be healthy ablebodied people gives us and can
give others a hell of a lotmore.
Yep.
Yeah.

(01:02:24):
It's funny that I really didn'tintend this to be like a gym
conversation.
This definitely like fits intophilosophy of fitness just fine.
Because I mean, I guess that'sjust, that's just.
The world that we live in.
It's really easy to

Cody (01:02:39):
see it.
It is.
But it also I think has to do alot with what we see the
imbalance in job culture andwork culture is that well,
that's how

Tali (01:02:48):
we know about it with so many people.

Cody (01:02:51):
And when I was saying earlier that, you know, the job
comes before your sleep and yourfamily and everything.
I don't think most people thinkof it that way, but really,
really stop and think about howyou structure your day.
It is around your job.
What time do you go to bed?
It depends on what time you needto get ready for work in the
morning.
Right?
Your sleep schedule isdetermined by your work.

(01:03:13):
Your time with your family isdetermined by what you can get
away with from your career, youroccupation, that kind of thing.
I just have a little bit of aproblem with that because I
think it's a little bit of adouble speak when people say,
Oh, my family's my top priority.
My health is a priority andthese kinds of things.

(01:03:34):
But if everything is being basedupon your career, then really
your career is the priorityabove yourself, above your
family.
It's not nice to hear that, butit's totally fine.
Yeah.
Well, look, I don't, I'm nottrying to put a moral judgment
on this as far as people'sindividual choices.

(01:03:54):
My problem is that most peopledon't make the choice.
It's just a default.
They're just there because thisis the expectation in our
society.
And I think there's a lot ofpeople who would probably not
prefer that if they thought theyhad a choice or

Tali (01:04:09):
posing the question.
Yeah.

Cody (01:04:11):
Yeah.
And so I guess my My, my realhope is to start to get people
to have these conversations withthemselves, with their spouses,
with their employers, maybe or,or start some sort of side
hustle where you can make somemore money at a higher value
point on your own so that youcan cut back on the trading

(01:04:32):
dollars for hours scenario and,and make some room in your life
for things that really areimportant.
Yeah.
Yeah.

Tali (01:04:40):
Yeah.
Like I said, I could have beenone of those people who is very
happy.
Working all the time, but to bewith you is not to be one of
those people.

Cody (01:04:50):
I realized that.
Unfortunately, yeah, I've beenin a scenario, you know working
three jobs.
And so my life was work.
That's what I did was work, but.
I was struggling financially,even with that.
And that would

Tali (01:05:05):
be the same thing for me because it wasn't not only did
it not serve the kind ofrelationship that you and I want
to have, because we have workedfull time alongside each other
and our relationship, you know,it wasn't like on the verge of
breaking up or anything, but itsucked for a while there.
Like it was just hard to be onthe same page.

(01:05:26):
You and I both are kind ofpeople who retreat.
And kind of like shut down when

Cody (01:05:30):
we don't feel good,

Tali (01:05:31):
right?
And so there was not a lot oflike high quality time spent
together in those years.
And you know, it's not in linewith the vision that we have for
our future either.
However, I think as a singleperson, I Was totally cool with

(01:05:52):
working all the time, but Iwasn't, you know, adding value.
I was just adding more to myplate and I wasn't able to
support my lifestyle.
And it was a very like lowoverhead, you know and it was
really troubling to me to belike, why?
Like, how?

(01:06:12):
I remember crying to my parentsbeing like, I am working my ass
off.
I am tired all the time.
How can I not afford myapartment?
Yeah.
It's devastating.
Yeah.

Cody (01:06:22):
It's rough.
Yeah.

Tali (01:06:24):
I've been there.
But it's an important lesson.
It was such an important lessonto me is like learning that more
isn't.
More like you and I buildingthis for ourselves.
That's been I mean, it's notonly the best money I've made
maybe aside from Nike, but Youknow the life balance.

(01:06:46):
Mm hmm.
Like I refuse to work at 5 a.
m.
I know that for so many yearsNot only because I was asked to
do it, but I also felt like Ishould be doing that, or that
was the way to get ahead.
And all it did was make metired.
Yeah.

Cody (01:07:03):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think you know, some of mybiggest regrets was just that
time away from family.
I feel like I missed out on mykids growing up.
And I think that's a prettycommon thing.
I mean, obviously it's a commonthing because, you know, cats in
the cradle and all that.
It's like everybody knows thestory.

(01:07:25):
But I think that.
I think a lot of people, like Isaid, they either think they
don't have a choice or they justdon't think about it at all.
And so they look back, I thinkmy biggest fear in life is
Groundhog's Day.
I've never even seen the movie,but I know the premise.
And I think that's the biggestfear is to live so many days

(01:07:47):
that look alike that when I'mold, I look back and think of
the five or six experiences Ihad.
You know, I don't, I would, Iwant to have so many experiences
that It's a plethora ofmemories, you know, that that's
the life I want.
And you can't have that ifyou're doing, if you're going to
the same job every day, everyday, every day for 40 or 50

(01:08:07):
years.
Some people want that.
It's fine.
Again, this isn't a moraljudgment on people's individual
desires, but most of us have achoice.
I was going to

Tali (01:08:18):
say, check in with yourself if it is a desire.
Yeah.

Cody (01:08:22):
Yeah.
Was there other things youwanted to discuss on this topic?
I don't think so.
Okay.
Yeah.
Work culture.
Work culture.
I think I think I have a lot ofcriticism for our Yeah.
Culture at large, like inAmerica,

Tali (01:08:39):
it's not just an individual thing.
There's a lot of demand that wehave to live up to.
Yeah, that's for sure.
Yeah.
And there's a lot of like oldways of doing things, you know
one of the things my mom alwayssays is like, I love working
with younger people.
They have such strong boundariesaround their work life balance

(01:09:00):
and I'm like, yeah, yeah.
Take

Cody (01:09:02):
a note.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.

Tali (01:09:05):
Again, love you so much, mom.

Cody (01:09:08):
Yeah.
Oh man, I was just going to saysomething and I spaced it out.
So no, that's okay.
Yeah, maybe I'll get it nexttime.
Shall we wrap up?
Yeah.
Okay.
It's fun to be back on the micwith you.
It is.
I love you.
I love

Tali (01:09:27):
you too.
See you next time.
Okay.
This episode was produced byTali Zari and Cody Limbaugh.
Check out our writing coachingservices and homesteading
adventures at live all yourlife.com.
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