February 12, 2025 • 24 mins
In this week’s episode, Shannon exposes two of the biggest money limiting beliefs keeping women stuck. If you’ve ever felt like the universe is testing you or that you have to prove yourself worthy before leveling up, this episode is here to shift your mindset.
Inside this episode, we’re unpacking:
- How money limiting beliefs keep you stuck in financial struggle
- The truth about how wealth is manifested—without suffering
- Why the idea that “the universe is testing you” is toxic nonsense
- How society programs women to believe they must earn wealth through hardship
- The difference between growth discomfort vs. stagnation disguised as suffering
- How to reprogram your subconscious for financial abundance
Be Empowered:
- Money limiting beliefs are not truth—they are conditioning.
- Struggle is not a manifestation strategy—alignment is.
- The universe is not outside of you, holding wealth hostage—it’s within you.
- You don’t have to prove yourself to receive financial abundance.
- You can manifest money, success, and freedom simply because you desire it—no suffering required.
✨ Ready to shift into effortless manifesting?
It’s time to break free from money blocks and align with abundance! Subscribe to the Manifest SHE magazine, it’s your personal trainer for manifestation, packed with money mindset shifts, wealth-building strategies, and manifestation exercises to keep you aligned with financial success. Best part? It’s completely free. Grab your copy now.
✨ Mentioned in This Episode
100 Why Trying to Manifest a Miracle Limits Mind-Blowing Abundance
It’s time to let go of financial struggle and align with wealth. Tune in now!
Get the Ultimate Manifesting Resource FREE and straight to your inbox every month! Grab the Manifest SHE™ Magazine. Each issue is packed full of manifesting insights, exercises, challenges, and more.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome back to the Live Life Unapologetically
podcast.
I'm Shannon Kaye, and todaywe're getting into something
that many of us have beenconditioned to believe, and
that's the idea that sufferingis a prerequisite to leveling up
.
That hardship must come first,that the universe is testing you
, throwing obstacles your way tosee if you can handle more
(00:22):
before it hands you what youwant.
Now let's call it what it isand we're going to go into it
Toxic nonsense, that's right.
This is toxic nonsense that wesee everywhere, even in the
manifestation universe.
So I want you to grab yourfavorite drink, cozy up and
we're going to go into why youdon't have to suffer before you
(00:46):
manifest what you want.
We hear it all the time youhave to go through the fire
before you can get the gold.
The universe is testing you tosee if you're ready.
You have to prove you canhandle more before you can
receive more.
This mindset is keeping so manywomen stuck.
This mindset is keeping so manywomen stuck.
(01:07):
It takes us out of our powerand makes it seem like the
universe is some gatekeeperholding abundance hostage until
we've struggled enough to earnit.
But the universe is not outsideof you.
You are it and it is you.
There is no grand exam you haveto pass before you're allowed
to have the wealth, the love,the success or the joy.
(01:30):
That whole idea is man-made.
It is a societal construct thatwe have been spoon-fed in
multiple areas of our life sincechildhood.
So where did it come from?
How have we been trained tothink that we have to prove our
worthiness before we can receivethe more?
(01:50):
Look at how this shows up ineveryday life.
In work, you're told show usyou can do the manager's job
before we actually give you thetitle and the paycheck.
We need you to show that youcan actually do the function
before we let you step into thefunction In relationships.
You to show that you canactually do the function before
we let you step into thefunction In relationships.
You may have been told that youhave to go through a bunch of
toxic exes and heartbreaksbefore you're going to find the
(02:13):
one so that you can learn Ineducation.
You suffer through the system,you go into debt and then maybe
you get a job that pays enoughto survive.
Let's talk about religion andculture.
God, or the universe, istesting you to make sure you're
worthy before blessing you,because this belief is so deeply
(02:35):
ingrained in almost every areaof our life, we apply it to
manifesting too.
We think I have to prove I canmanage what I have before I can
receive more wealth.
I must struggle first and thenmy breakthrough will come.
As a matter of fact, somepeople glorify the struggle and
(02:57):
the breakthrough.
Do you see what I went through?
And now look what I have?
It's become glorified.
Maybe you feel like yourhardships are the universe's way
of preparing you for abundance,because, oh my gosh, to have
that abundance you need to knowthat you got to suffer.
Like make that make sense.
My hardships are preparing me.
(03:17):
So suffrage prepares you forgood.
Suffrage prepares you for peace, the joy, the happiness that
you want in your life.
It's this idea that I mustalways hurt first for it to be
true.
Abundance, sustainableabundance, like the good
abundance only stays.
(03:38):
It's not a fluke, because Isuffered through and I made it
through.
But this is not how it works.
That is not how any of it works.
Struggle is not a manifestationstrategy.
If you believe suffering is anecessary step to get what you
want, guess what?
You will keep manifestingstruggle.
(04:01):
The universe isn't throwingobstacles at you to see if you
can handle it, but yoursubconscious is creating a
reality that aligns with yourbeliefs.
So if you believe hardship mustcome first, your mind and
energy will literally seek outand create situations that
(04:24):
reinforce that belief.
I see so many people who say Iknow I went through all this
horrible things so that I couldcome out and help other people.
It's my breakthrough and mybreakthrough is going to help
others.
As if the only way, or the mostimpactful way, that you can
help others is to go throughhorrible struggles, come out on
(04:48):
the other side and then you'regoing to make this big impact in
the world, the greatest impact.
The most important people, themost inspiring people had to go
through hell to get where theyare so that they could show you
that it's possible.
But this leads to anotherbelief that I have to go through
(05:09):
the worst to get the most, andthat's simply not true.
I've done this myself.
I used to tell myself that mybig wins had to come after a
breakdown, that I had tostruggle through the trenches
first to make me deserving of it.
To struggle through thetrenches first to make me
(05:29):
deserving of it.
That because I went throughsuch horrible things, that's why
I was blessed on the other sideand, sure enough, I kept
manifesting breakdowns.
I kept repeating the cyclebecause I thought that's how it
had to be.
Then I decided, probably abouta year ago, that I was sick of
that crap.
Why do I have to suffer for themore?
And I started to dig into thatand I started to realize what
(05:54):
I'm sharing with you today thatit is a trap.
The whole best things come fromsuffering mindset is a trap.
It keeps you stuck in a loopwhere you think you have to earn
abundance through struggleinstead of simply aligning with
it.
So many coaches have told meshare your story, all the things
(06:15):
that you've been through.
You need to tell people yoursuffrage from where you were to
where you are now and I'veplayed with the idea of it
because I want people to knowthat you don't have to stay
stuck.
But this idea of sharing allthe horrible shit that happened
in my life and now, because Isuffered that good things came
(06:38):
from that.
But the truth is good thingsdidn't come from the suffering.
Good things came from mechanging my mindset and how I
moved through the world.
When people ask me to share mystory and I think that is so
toxic of this.
Oh, I've been through so muchshit.
It's really, to me, toxicbecause it identifies that the
(07:01):
horrible things that otherpeople did to me is the only
reason I have what I have, and Irefuse to believe that their
hurt to me is the reason I havemore, that without them doing
bad things I wouldn't be where Iam today.
I just don't believe that.
I am who I am.
(07:23):
Whatever they did to me istheir problem.
It was never my problem.
So why go into the details andthe nitty gritty?
Because the hurt they put on meis not my story.
I am my story.
My life today is my story.
I am my story.
My life today is my story.
(07:44):
Now I've made choices that Ihad to go through and decide.
Is that a choice I want to makeagain?
And there's consequences to mychoices?
That is my story, becausethat's my story.
I wrote those things, not whatsomebody else wrote for me.
It is a trap to think that youmust suffer or go through it to
earn some kind of magicalabundance at the end.
This also takes me into anotheridea that spurs from this, and
(08:07):
it's lessons versus limitations,because this really sneaks in
also as an idea that everythingin life is a lesson and you have
to learn before you can receivewhat you desire, that the
universe is trying to teach yousomething I just said.
I made choices in my life.
(08:27):
You've made choices in yourlife.
Our choices aren't lessons.
They just have differentconsequences.
You might make a differentchoice later because you don't
like the consequence of thefirst choice, but it's not
because an outside force came in, put an obstacle in your way
and said, huh, can you overcomethis?
(08:49):
It's not, it's just okay, thiswas a result.
Next time I'll do it different.
Or next time I'll actually doit the same way.
And some people might say, well,shannon, isn't that a lesson?
It's just choices, like I'mtalking lesson and the fact that
, okay, let me give you someexamples of what I really mean
here.
I have to learn to manage mypennies before I can build trust
(09:12):
with millions.
I have to be super responsiblewith money before I can have
more.
I have to learn every singlelesson before I can level up.
That's what I mean by lessonthat you actually have to be
perfect wherever you are.
And this really goes into wheredoes perfectionism come from?
Why do we have a perfectionismissue, especially for women,
because it's been ingrained intoyou that you must be perfect at
(09:36):
some point before you can go tothe next point.
But I really want to flip thatfor a second, because we don't
apply this thinking anywhereelse.
No one says you have to provehow to properly squeeze the
toothpaste tube before you canbe trusted with brushing your
teeth.
You know you can't squeeze itfrom the top, you have to
(09:57):
squeeze it from the bottom.
And well, if you can't squeezefrom the bottom and roll it a
certain way, you're just notready to brush your teeth.
Nobody else should be perfectanywhere else.
But I'm going to tell you, whenit comes to money and abundance
and happiness and joy, peoplethink oh well, I have to be
perfect where I am.
I have to be perfect in mymisery.
(10:17):
I have to be perfect where I am.
I have to be perfect in mymisery.
I have to be perfect in mystruggle.
I have to be perfect in justsurviving to get by, to show
that I'm trustworthy enough tohave more.
But we don't do that withanything else.
No one says you have todemonstrate good stewardship of
your dishes before you'reallowed to have a kitchen.
(10:38):
This doesn't happen that way.
So why do we do this withabundance, with money, with our
businesses?
Because it's a belief that wasdesigned to keep people broke
while allowing those who misusewealth to keep getting richer.
I'm going to say that again itis a belief that was designed to
(11:01):
keep people broke whileallowing those who misuse wealth
to keep getting richer.
I want you to really think aboutsome examples in the world of
people who did not have tomanage pennies before they were
given millions.
Think about people who neverhad to be responsible with money
(11:22):
, but they were still allowed tohave money.
Most successful entrepreneursmade serious mistakes along the
way, but they still leveled up.
I hear so many stories fromwomen about their businesses
exploding so fast that theycould not keep up and they were
(11:42):
drowning because it was just somuch more than they anticipated.
Does that mean that they didn'tlearn the lesson of how to
manage their business beforeleveling up?
There wasn't one.
There didn't have to be one.
It just leveled up because theyjust believed oh well, I'm
leveling up in my imperfectbrand new business.
Whatever happens happens.
(12:03):
Those are the ones who are mostsuccessful because they're not
stuck in this trap, because whodecides anyway?
Who decides when you've managedyour pennies to be trustworthy.
Who decides when you'reresponsible enough before having
more?
Who decides that you've learnedevery single lesson and you're
perfect now so you can have themore?
(12:25):
It's a construct in your mindand this belief that was
designed to keep people broke.
Let me tell you why it wasdesigned to keep people broke,
because nobody is perfect.
If you've managed your penniesreally well for six months, but
you had an off day and you wentand spent a whole bunch of money
because you saw everything youwanted on sale, then you're
going to say, oh my gosh, I suckat money management.
(12:49):
I have to start all over.
I still haven't learned how tomanage my money.
You never give yourself creditfor the six months of great you
did.
You look at that one moment andsay I suck at managing money.
I really need to work on thisbetter.
And this belief comes from, onceagain, people who were in power
(13:09):
, and people who were in powerwho had wealth and they wanted
to keep getting richer, and sothey made this up.
They made it up to make themlook like they were the trusted
ones.
They were the chosen onesbecause they were so wonderful.
They got to have this abundancebecause they were such good
stewards of the money and theyknew all the things and you know
(13:30):
nothing.
But once you figure it out, youcould be like me it's not how
manifesting works.
Well, it is, but it's notbecause they put this belief
into you of suffrage andlearning lessons before you can
level up and manifest.
And so now you're stuck in acycle of never feeling like
you're good enough to go to thenext level.
(13:51):
What actually allows you tomanifest isn't suffering and it
isn't proving yourself, becauseneither of those things is a
requirement for abundance.
So what is a requirement forabundance?
Just removing the blocks thatare keeping you from it.
That's it.
You don't have to pass a test,you don't have to prove anything
.
You don't need to suffer.
(14:12):
First, you need to clear thesubconscious beliefs that are
telling you otherwise.
That's what I help women do inmy Manifest Sheet coaching
program, because we all havedifferent limiting beliefs
around money.
This is a big common limitingbelief.
The ones we're talking abouttoday that many people buy into.
As a matter of fact, manypeople don't think this is a
limiting belief.
The ones we're talking abouttoday that many people buy into.
(14:33):
As a matter of fact, manypeople don't think this is a
limiting belief because theythink this is just how it's
supposed to be.
But it is limiting because youco-create with the universe.
The universe is not outside ofyou saying prove yourself, prove
yourself.
You are the universe and theuniverse is you.
We go into belief systems thatare deeply ingrained in women
and society and religion andculture in my program to clear
(14:58):
out any limiting beliefs.
Limiting beliefs can be easy toovercome.
They can take some time toovercome.
I've shared a lot of limitingbeliefs that I've had based on
my upbringing.
It's just your programming.
It's saying I'm going to alignmy program in my mind to what I
want to manifest.
That's all that's required.
It's just getting on thefrequency of what you want.
(15:19):
So if you believe thatsuffering is indeed needed
before you can move forward, ifyou believe you have to pass
lessons before you can goforward, well, that is the
frequency that you're on.
That is the belief that youhave decided you want.
That is the frequency you're onand that is what will happen.
Or you can decide to maybe geton a different frequency.
(15:40):
You get to choose.
See in manifestation.
You get to choose.
You see it.
You say is that what I want,and is that what I want to
choose?
No, that's limiting me, thatdoesn't feel good to me, that
doesn't align with how I wantthings.
I'm going to choose somethingdifferent.
I did this, like I said, Ireally dove into this about a
year ago, and the more women Ispeak with and work with, the
(16:03):
more this comes up.
Well, shannon, I know I'malmost there because life is
falling apart right now, and youknow, when life falls apart,
that means you're going into thenew Suffrage, and it doesn't
have to be, and that's why Ireally wanted to talk about that
today.
Well, shannon, so manymanifesting coaches say, when
(16:23):
your life is falling apart,that's a good thing because
you're moving into your newtimeline and you're leaving the
old one behind.
But let's really talk aboutthat, because that's still
suffrage and that's still toxic.
That you have to loseeverything to gain something
that goes into the same beliefsystem that we were taught by
society that we're trying to getout of by tapping into
(16:46):
manifesting on purpose.
Let's really talk about whatdoes it mean, or what are signs
to know, because a lot of timeswe equate discomfort with this
socially conditioned struggle orthis socially conditioned
everything has to fall apart sothat I can walk into my new.
First of all, there are thingsin my life that I don't want to
(17:08):
fall apart because I like howthey are.
So why does my whole life haveto fall apart for me to step
into my desires, when I'malready living in most of my
desires A societal conditionedstruggle?
You might be thinking that, hey, shannon, I am moving toward my
desire and it feelsuncomfortable, it feels like
(17:29):
suffering, it doesn't feel good.
But there's a differencebetween discomfort and suffering
.
Now I go into this in greatdetail on the episode Courage
Over Fear.
So you can check that one out.
It is way down on the playlist.
I'm going to tell you I don'teven know what number episode it
is, but Courage Over Fear talksa lot about this.
(17:50):
Because you're stepping into theunknown, see, you're stepping
into the unknown.
See, when you step into theunknown, that is discomfort,
that is growth.
But staying in a cycle ofsuffering, waiting to be ready,
that's conditioning.
Your brain loves the known, itcraves predictability because it
(18:10):
wants to keep you safe.
So when you move into somethingnew, when you expand, it will
feel uncertain and maybe evenscary.
But that is not suffering, thatis newness being stuck in a
(18:36):
lesson or proving yourself.
That is stagnation that keepsyou in the same place, waiting
for an imaginary permission slipto move forward.
So when we say, oh, you knowyour manifestations are about to
come, instead of us saying,when everything's going to shit,
that's how you know yourmanifestations are coming.
No, that is rooted in thistoxic, societal, conditioned
(19:01):
struggle.
You know that you are steppinginto a new frequency.
You know you are aligning withnew desires.
When you may feel uncertain andyou may feel scary, you're not
suffering.
Things aren't happening to you.
It just it feels uneasy, itfeels weird because it's new,
(19:21):
not in some perpetual cycle inthe same place, just suffering.
So the feeling of newness mightbe oh my gosh, I'm really
excited to go on a vacation tothis new place that I've been
wanting to go to.
But I'm a little nervous too,because I've never been here
(19:42):
before.
I don't know what to expect.
So I'm excited and I'm nervousall at the same time.
That is you aligning to yournew desire.
It comes with excitement.
It feels like a good feeling,but also a scary feeling and you
may say, oh my gosh, did I makea mistake on going on a trip?
(20:02):
Oh, I've always wanted totravel by myself and take a solo
trip.
Oh but that's scary.
I don't have anybody with me, Idon't know what if I get lost.
And you may have all thesethoughts, but at the same time
you're like, oh my gosh, this isgoing to be so empowering.
That is stepping into the newfrequency of doing something new
(20:26):
outside of your comfort zone.
Struggling, suffering,stagnation is staying in the
same place, not moving at all,not changing your frequency at
all, and hoping for some miracleto make you feel better at the
end.
There's also another episode.
You can check out whymanifesting miracles is probably
not the way to go.
I don't know the exact title ofthat one, but I want you to
(20:48):
check out courage over fear andthe manifesting miracle thing,
because a lot of times whenwe're stuck in this stagnation
and stuck in this suffering, wehave a miracle mindset I'm gonna
suffer, but it's okay becauseI'm gonna get a miracle.
And then it just repeats.
So how do you get out of?
I have to suffer first.
(21:11):
Start questioning where thebelief is showing up in your
life.
Are you telling yourself thatyou have to struggle first, that
you need to earn your abundance?
Pay attention to those thoughts.
Then, as always, you're goingto reframe that belief.
Instead of saying I have toprove myself first, start by
saying I'm already worthy ofmore.
(21:31):
Y'all know my favoriteaffirmation is I am worthy
simply because I exist.
Give yourself permission toreceive no test, no suffering,
just because you desire it.
Not because you deserve it, notbecause you did something for
it.
You just desire it, you want it, so it's yours.
And then get support.
(21:51):
If you need support, becausemanifesting is a learned process
, manifesting on purpose, let mesay that we're always
manifesting all the time,whether we believe in it or not.
It's just how it is.
But if you want to manifest onpurpose and you want to learn
and you want somebody to helpthrough this process, then just
get the free subscription to theManifest she magazine.
(22:11):
You get a welcome issue and youget a new issue every month.
I like to call it your personaltrainer for manifestation,
because it has everything thatyou need in there.
It has challenges to keep youmoving and going.
It has inspiration in there.
It has challenges to keep youmoving and going.
It has inspiration.
It takes the toxicness out ofhaving the life you want.
You can ask questions directlyand have them answered so that
(22:35):
you do have that support and itis free, always free.
That's going to be linked inthe show notes.
Before I let you go, I want youto leave here remembering that
you're not here to proveyourself worthy of your desires
to anyone or anything.
The universe is not outside ofyou, it is within you.
(22:55):
You co create, you are partners.
You are here to align with yourdesires, not to struggle for
them.
So let go of the lie thatstruggle is the price of
admission to your dream life,because that price was made up
and you don't have to pay itUntil next time.
(23:16):
Go manifest something amazingin the sloppiest way, without
perfection, just because youwant it, because you are here to
create the life that you desire, without limitations, without
restriction, without suffering.
I'll chat with you next week.
Welcome back to the Live Life Unapologetically
podcast.
I'm Shannon Kaye, and todaywe're getting into something
that many of us have beenconditioned to believe, and
that's the idea that sufferingis a prerequisite to leveling up
.
That hardship must come first,that the universe is testing you
, throwing obstacles your way tosee if you can handle more
(00:22):
before it hands you what youwant.
Now let's call it what it isand we're going to go into it
Toxic nonsense, that's right.
This is toxic nonsense that wesee everywhere, even in the
manifestation universe.
So I want you to grab yourfavorite drink, cozy up and
we're going to go into why youdon't have to suffer before you
(00:46):
manifest what you want.
We hear it all the time youhave to go through the fire
before you can get the gold.
The universe is testing you tosee if you're ready.
You have to prove you canhandle more before you can
receive more.
This mindset is keeping so manywomen stuck.
This mindset is keeping so manywomen stuck.
(01:07):
It takes us out of our powerand makes it seem like the
universe is some gatekeeperholding abundance hostage until
we've struggled enough to earnit.
But the universe is not outsideof you.
You are it and it is you.
There is no grand exam you haveto pass before you're allowed
to have the wealth, the love,the success or the joy.
(01:30):
That whole idea is man-made.
It is a societal construct thatwe have been spoon-fed in
multiple areas of our life sincechildhood.
So where did it come from?
How have we been trained tothink that we have to prove our
worthiness before we can receivethe more?
(01:50):
Look at how this shows up ineveryday life.
In work, you're told show usyou can do the manager's job
before we actually give you thetitle and the paycheck.
We need you to show that youcan actually do the function
before we let you step into thefunction In relationships.
You to show that you canactually do the function before
we let you step into thefunction In relationships.
You may have been told that youhave to go through a bunch of
toxic exes and heartbreaksbefore you're going to find the
(02:13):
one so that you can learn Ineducation.
You suffer through the system,you go into debt and then maybe
you get a job that pays enoughto survive.
Let's talk about religion andculture.
God, or the universe, istesting you to make sure you're
worthy before blessing you,because this belief is so deeply
(02:35):
ingrained in almost every areaof our life, we apply it to
manifesting too.
We think I have to prove I canmanage what I have before I can
receive more wealth.
I must struggle first and thenmy breakthrough will come.
As a matter of fact, somepeople glorify the struggle and
(02:57):
the breakthrough.
Do you see what I went through?
And now look what I have?
It's become glorified.
Maybe you feel like yourhardships are the universe's way
of preparing you for abundance,because, oh my gosh, to have
that abundance you need to knowthat you got to suffer.
Like make that make sense.
My hardships are preparing me.
(03:17):
So suffrage prepares you forgood.
Suffrage prepares you for peace, the joy, the happiness that
you want in your life.
It's this idea that I mustalways hurt first for it to be
true.
Abundance, sustainableabundance, like the good
abundance only stays.
(03:38):
It's not a fluke, because Isuffered through and I made it
through.
But this is not how it works.
That is not how any of it works.
Struggle is not a manifestationstrategy.
If you believe suffering is anecessary step to get what you
want, guess what?
You will keep manifestingstruggle.
(04:01):
The universe isn't throwingobstacles at you to see if you
can handle it, but yoursubconscious is creating a
reality that aligns with yourbeliefs.
So if you believe hardship mustcome first, your mind and
energy will literally seek outand create situations that
(04:24):
reinforce that belief.
I see so many people who say Iknow I went through all this
horrible things so that I couldcome out and help other people.
It's my breakthrough and mybreakthrough is going to help
others.
As if the only way, or the mostimpactful way, that you can
help others is to go throughhorrible struggles, come out on
(04:48):
the other side and then you'regoing to make this big impact in
the world, the greatest impact.
The most important people, themost inspiring people had to go
through hell to get where theyare so that they could show you
that it's possible.
But this leads to anotherbelief that I have to go through
(05:09):
the worst to get the most, andthat's simply not true.
I've done this myself.
I used to tell myself that mybig wins had to come after a
breakdown, that I had tostruggle through the trenches
first to make me deserving of it.
To struggle through thetrenches first to make me
(05:29):
deserving of it.
That because I went throughsuch horrible things, that's why
I was blessed on the other sideand, sure enough, I kept
manifesting breakdowns.
I kept repeating the cyclebecause I thought that's how it
had to be.
Then I decided, probably abouta year ago, that I was sick of
that crap.
Why do I have to suffer for themore?
And I started to dig into thatand I started to realize what
(05:54):
I'm sharing with you today thatit is a trap.
The whole best things come fromsuffering mindset is a trap.
It keeps you stuck in a loopwhere you think you have to earn
abundance through struggleinstead of simply aligning with
it.
So many coaches have told meshare your story, all the things
(06:15):
that you've been through.
You need to tell people yoursuffrage from where you were to
where you are now and I'veplayed with the idea of it
because I want people to knowthat you don't have to stay
stuck.
But this idea of sharing allthe horrible shit that happened
in my life and now, because Isuffered that good things came
(06:38):
from that.
But the truth is good thingsdidn't come from the suffering.
Good things came from mechanging my mindset and how I
moved through the world.
When people ask me to share mystory and I think that is so
toxic of this.
Oh, I've been through so muchshit.
It's really, to me, toxicbecause it identifies that the
(07:01):
horrible things that otherpeople did to me is the only
reason I have what I have, and Irefuse to believe that their
hurt to me is the reason I havemore, that without them doing
bad things I wouldn't be where Iam today.
I just don't believe that.
I am who I am.
(07:23):
Whatever they did to me istheir problem.
It was never my problem.
So why go into the details andthe nitty gritty?
Because the hurt they put on meis not my story.
I am my story.
My life today is my story.
I am my story.
My life today is my story.
(07:44):
Now I've made choices that Ihad to go through and decide.
Is that a choice I want to makeagain?
And there's consequences to mychoices?
That is my story, becausethat's my story.
I wrote those things, not whatsomebody else wrote for me.
It is a trap to think that youmust suffer or go through it to
earn some kind of magicalabundance at the end.
This also takes me into anotheridea that spurs from this, and
(08:07):
it's lessons versus limitations,because this really sneaks in
also as an idea that everythingin life is a lesson and you have
to learn before you can receivewhat you desire, that the
universe is trying to teach yousomething I just said.
I made choices in my life.
(08:27):
You've made choices in yourlife.
Our choices aren't lessons.
They just have differentconsequences.
You might make a differentchoice later because you don't
like the consequence of thefirst choice, but it's not
because an outside force came in, put an obstacle in your way
and said, huh, can you overcomethis?
(08:49):
It's not, it's just okay, thiswas a result.
Next time I'll do it different.
Or next time I'll actually doit the same way.
And some people might say, well,shannon, isn't that a lesson?
It's just choices, like I'mtalking lesson and the fact that
, okay, let me give you someexamples of what I really mean
here.
I have to learn to manage mypennies before I can build trust
(09:12):
with millions.
I have to be super responsiblewith money before I can have
more.
I have to learn every singlelesson before I can level up.
That's what I mean by lessonthat you actually have to be
perfect wherever you are.
And this really goes into wheredoes perfectionism come from?
Why do we have a perfectionismissue, especially for women,
because it's been ingrained intoyou that you must be perfect at
(09:36):
some point before you can go tothe next point.
But I really want to flip thatfor a second, because we don't
apply this thinking anywhereelse.
No one says you have to provehow to properly squeeze the
toothpaste tube before you canbe trusted with brushing your
teeth.
You know you can't squeeze itfrom the top, you have to
(09:57):
squeeze it from the bottom.
And well, if you can't squeezefrom the bottom and roll it a
certain way, you're just notready to brush your teeth.
Nobody else should be perfectanywhere else.
But I'm going to tell you, whenit comes to money and abundance
and happiness and joy, peoplethink oh well, I have to be
perfect where I am.
I have to be perfect in mymisery.
(10:17):
I have to be perfect where I am.
I have to be perfect in mymisery.
I have to be perfect in mystruggle.
I have to be perfect in justsurviving to get by, to show
that I'm trustworthy enough tohave more.
But we don't do that withanything else.
No one says you have todemonstrate good stewardship of
your dishes before you'reallowed to have a kitchen.
(10:38):
This doesn't happen that way.
So why do we do this withabundance, with money, with our
businesses?
Because it's a belief that wasdesigned to keep people broke
while allowing those who misusewealth to keep getting richer.
I'm going to say that again itis a belief that was designed to
(11:01):
keep people broke whileallowing those who misuse wealth
to keep getting richer.
I want you to really think aboutsome examples in the world of
people who did not have tomanage pennies before they were
given millions.
Think about people who neverhad to be responsible with money
(11:22):
, but they were still allowed tohave money.
Most successful entrepreneursmade serious mistakes along the
way, but they still leveled up.
I hear so many stories fromwomen about their businesses
exploding so fast that theycould not keep up and they were
(11:42):
drowning because it was just somuch more than they anticipated.
Does that mean that they didn'tlearn the lesson of how to
manage their business beforeleveling up?
There wasn't one.
There didn't have to be one.
It just leveled up because theyjust believed oh well, I'm
leveling up in my imperfectbrand new business.
Whatever happens happens.
(12:03):
Those are the ones who are mostsuccessful because they're not
stuck in this trap, because whodecides anyway?
Who decides when you've managedyour pennies to be trustworthy.
Who decides when you'reresponsible enough before having
more?
Who decides that you've learnedevery single lesson and you're
perfect now so you can have themore?
(12:25):
It's a construct in your mindand this belief that was
designed to keep people broke.
Let me tell you why it wasdesigned to keep people broke,
because nobody is perfect.
If you've managed your penniesreally well for six months, but
you had an off day and you wentand spent a whole bunch of money
because you saw everything youwanted on sale, then you're
going to say, oh my gosh, I suckat money management.
(12:49):
I have to start all over.
I still haven't learned how tomanage my money.
You never give yourself creditfor the six months of great you
did.
You look at that one moment andsay I suck at managing money.
I really need to work on thisbetter.
And this belief comes from, onceagain, people who were in power
(13:09):
, and people who were in powerwho had wealth and they wanted
to keep getting richer, and sothey made this up.
They made it up to make themlook like they were the trusted
ones.
They were the chosen onesbecause they were so wonderful.
They got to have this abundancebecause they were such good
stewards of the money and theyknew all the things and you know
(13:30):
nothing.
But once you figure it out, youcould be like me it's not how
manifesting works.
Well, it is, but it's notbecause they put this belief
into you of suffrage andlearning lessons before you can
level up and manifest.
And so now you're stuck in acycle of never feeling like
you're good enough to go to thenext level.
(13:51):
What actually allows you tomanifest isn't suffering and it
isn't proving yourself, becauseneither of those things is a
requirement for abundance.
So what is a requirement forabundance?
Just removing the blocks thatare keeping you from it.
That's it.
You don't have to pass a test,you don't have to prove anything
.
You don't need to suffer.
(14:12):
First, you need to clear thesubconscious beliefs that are
telling you otherwise.
That's what I help women do inmy Manifest Sheet coaching
program, because we all havedifferent limiting beliefs
around money.
This is a big common limitingbelief.
The ones we're talking abouttoday that many people buy into.
As a matter of fact, manypeople don't think this is a
limiting belief.
The ones we're talking abouttoday that many people buy into.
(14:33):
As a matter of fact, manypeople don't think this is a
limiting belief because theythink this is just how it's
supposed to be.
But it is limiting because youco-create with the universe.
The universe is not outside ofyou saying prove yourself, prove
yourself.
You are the universe and theuniverse is you.
We go into belief systems thatare deeply ingrained in women
and society and religion andculture in my program to clear
(14:58):
out any limiting beliefs.
Limiting beliefs can be easy toovercome.
They can take some time toovercome.
I've shared a lot of limitingbeliefs that I've had based on
my upbringing.
It's just your programming.
It's saying I'm going to alignmy program in my mind to what I
want to manifest.
That's all that's required.
It's just getting on thefrequency of what you want.
(15:19):
So if you believe thatsuffering is indeed needed
before you can move forward, ifyou believe you have to pass
lessons before you can goforward, well, that is the
frequency that you're on.
That is the belief that youhave decided you want.
That is the frequency you're onand that is what will happen.
Or you can decide to maybe geton a different frequency.
(15:40):
You get to choose.
See in manifestation.
You get to choose.
You see it.
You say is that what I want,and is that what I want to
choose?
No, that's limiting me, thatdoesn't feel good to me, that
doesn't align with how I wantthings.
I'm going to choose somethingdifferent.
I did this, like I said, Ireally dove into this about a
year ago, and the more women Ispeak with and work with, the
(16:03):
more this comes up.
Well, shannon, I know I'malmost there because life is
falling apart right now, and youknow, when life falls apart,
that means you're going into thenew Suffrage, and it doesn't
have to be, and that's why Ireally wanted to talk about that
today.
Well, shannon, so manymanifesting coaches say, when
(16:23):
your life is falling apart,that's a good thing because
you're moving into your newtimeline and you're leaving the
old one behind.
But let's really talk aboutthat, because that's still
suffrage and that's still toxic.
That you have to loseeverything to gain something
that goes into the same beliefsystem that we were taught by
society that we're trying to getout of by tapping into
(16:46):
manifesting on purpose.
Let's really talk about whatdoes it mean, or what are signs
to know, because a lot of timeswe equate discomfort with this
socially conditioned struggle orthis socially conditioned
everything has to fall apart sothat I can walk into my new.
First of all, there are thingsin my life that I don't want to
(17:08):
fall apart because I like howthey are.
So why does my whole life haveto fall apart for me to step
into my desires, when I'malready living in most of my
desires A societal conditionedstruggle?
You might be thinking that, hey, shannon, I am moving toward my
desire and it feelsuncomfortable, it feels like
(17:29):
suffering, it doesn't feel good.
But there's a differencebetween discomfort and suffering
.
Now I go into this in greatdetail on the episode Courage
Over Fear.
So you can check that one out.
It is way down on the playlist.
I'm going to tell you I don'teven know what number episode it
is, but Courage Over Fear talksa lot about this.
(17:50):
Because you're stepping into theunknown, see, you're stepping
into the unknown.
See, when you step into theunknown, that is discomfort,
that is growth.
But staying in a cycle ofsuffering, waiting to be ready,
that's conditioning.
Your brain loves the known, itcraves predictability because it
(18:10):
wants to keep you safe.
So when you move into somethingnew, when you expand, it will
feel uncertain and maybe evenscary.
But that is not suffering, thatis newness being stuck in a
(18:36):
lesson or proving yourself.
That is stagnation that keepsyou in the same place, waiting
for an imaginary permission slipto move forward.
So when we say, oh, you knowyour manifestations are about to
come, instead of us saying,when everything's going to shit,
that's how you know yourmanifestations are coming.
No, that is rooted in thistoxic, societal, conditioned
(19:01):
struggle.
You know that you are steppinginto a new frequency.
You know you are aligning withnew desires.
When you may feel uncertain andyou may feel scary, you're not
suffering.
Things aren't happening to you.
It just it feels uneasy, itfeels weird because it's new,
(19:21):
not in some perpetual cycle inthe same place, just suffering.
So the feeling of newness mightbe oh my gosh, I'm really
excited to go on a vacation tothis new place that I've been
wanting to go to.
But I'm a little nervous too,because I've never been here
(19:42):
before.
I don't know what to expect.
So I'm excited and I'm nervousall at the same time.
That is you aligning to yournew desire.
It comes with excitement.
It feels like a good feeling,but also a scary feeling and you
may say, oh my gosh, did I makea mistake on going on a trip?
(20:02):
Oh, I've always wanted totravel by myself and take a solo
trip.
Oh but that's scary.
I don't have anybody with me, Idon't know what if I get lost.
And you may have all thesethoughts, but at the same time
you're like, oh my gosh, this isgoing to be so empowering.
That is stepping into the newfrequency of doing something new
(20:26):
outside of your comfort zone.
Struggling, suffering,stagnation is staying in the
same place, not moving at all,not changing your frequency at
all, and hoping for some miracleto make you feel better at the
end.
There's also another episode.
You can check out whymanifesting miracles is probably
not the way to go.
I don't know the exact title ofthat one, but I want you to
(20:48):
check out courage over fear andthe manifesting miracle thing,
because a lot of times whenwe're stuck in this stagnation
and stuck in this suffering, wehave a miracle mindset I'm gonna
suffer, but it's okay becauseI'm gonna get a miracle.
And then it just repeats.
So how do you get out of?
I have to suffer first.
(21:11):
Start questioning where thebelief is showing up in your
life.
Are you telling yourself thatyou have to struggle first, that
you need to earn your abundance?
Pay attention to those thoughts.
Then, as always, you're goingto reframe that belief.
Instead of saying I have toprove myself first, start by
saying I'm already worthy ofmore.
(21:31):
Y'all know my favoriteaffirmation is I am worthy
simply because I exist.
Give yourself permission toreceive no test, no suffering,
just because you desire it.
Not because you deserve it, notbecause you did something for
it.
You just desire it, you want it, so it's yours.
And then get support.
(21:51):
If you need support, becausemanifesting is a learned process
, manifesting on purpose, let mesay that we're always
manifesting all the time,whether we believe in it or not.
It's just how it is.
But if you want to manifest onpurpose and you want to learn
and you want somebody to helpthrough this process, then just
get the free subscription to theManifest she magazine.
(22:11):
You get a welcome issue and youget a new issue every month.
I like to call it your personaltrainer for manifestation,
because it has everything thatyou need in there.
It has challenges to keep youmoving and going.
It has inspiration in there.
It has challenges to keep youmoving and going.
It has inspiration.
It takes the toxicness out ofhaving the life you want.
You can ask questions directlyand have them answered so that
(22:35):
you do have that support and itis free, always free.
That's going to be linked inthe show notes.
Before I let you go, I want youto leave here remembering that
you're not here to proveyourself worthy of your desires
to anyone or anything.
The universe is not outside ofyou, it is within you.
(22:55):
You co create, you are partners.
You are here to align with yourdesires, not to struggle for
them.
So let go of the lie thatstruggle is the price of
admission to your dream life,because that price was made up
and you don't have to pay itUntil next time.
(23:16):
Go manifest something amazingin the sloppiest way, without
perfection, just because youwant it, because you are here to
create the life that you desire, without limitations, without
restriction, without suffering.
I'll chat with you next week.
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