Ep. 130: Down The Rabbit Hole w/ Ben Carroll

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:22):
When you change. The way you look at things, the
things you look at change. What exists?
Reality itself is gorgeous. It is the plenum, the fullness
of total joy. The universe is a celebration.

(00:45):
It's a firework show. To celebrate that existence is
while we. For those of us seeking a life
of meaning and purpose, capturing fulfillment in every
moment of now, seeking the truthof our reality so we can live
this life to its fullest, this is the Live This Life podcast

(01:11):
and I'm your hosting Cummings. I'm here to inspire you to ask
yourself the question every day.Are you living party?
Killing time? What's going on?
Everybody? Welcome back to another episode.
And I have my good friend, soundhealer extraordinaire.

(01:32):
I'm going to call him former guitar God because he's moved on
to his his other areas of expertise.
But my Obi Wan Kenobi, my good friend Ben Carroll.
Welcome back to the show, my friend.
ETH it's It's so awesome to be back for my 4th time. 4th time
4th. Time and and it's been just over
2 years. We just looked it up.

(01:53):
It's crazy. I still own some guitars.
You still you still play them? I still teach guitar two days a
week. Do you really?
Yeah. Did you do like the online stuff
or in person? Oh.
Yeah, I've been teaching online guitar lessons strictly no in
person since 2009 because ahead of the time I.
Maybe one of these days I will actually free up some time in my

(02:15):
schedule and take actual lessons'cause I I love playing guitar.
I started doing my own, but I definitely need a good teacher.
And knowing that, you know, I got probably one of the best
teachers right here, right now, who still teaches.
Yeah, I do get I I've actually this this October.
It will be my 29th year teachingguitar which.
Is. Freaking crazy.

(02:36):
I'm because I'm 46. I started when I was 17.
Right. So how's life down South?
I know you moved last year it toa bit of heartbreak for me and
Sylvia because we started becoming you and good friends
with you and Janine and you guysheaded for warmer pastures,
that's for sure. How's life down in Georgia?
It's it's great. Do not let me tell you how much

(02:57):
I regret it, how much I regretted it on June 25th.
I'm sorry, January 25th when I looked out the window and the
daffodils were coming up. That's how much I regret it.
We had, we had our windows open here for like 4 months straight
before before somewhere like literally like open 24/7 like
for like 4 months is so beautiful right now it's it's a

(03:21):
little warm but you know it's it's in the 80s and 90s.
It's it's no different than thanMaine would be on some days.
You know it's probably 10° warmer a lot of times.
But yeah, love it down here. I've met some amazing people,
big change. But really it was time time to
get out of Maine. I loved Maine.
I was there for a decade. Met some amazing people, played
a lot of studios around there doing same healing and it was

(03:43):
really like the place where I had my massive reawakening.
Met so many people. But it was time, you know, I
was, I was feeling that call to move someplace.
It was almost like, you know, being compelled to get out to
someplace new to build a new bubble and and create some some
new fun resonance. So yeah, we've been here for 14

(04:07):
months now and. The wind.
Every minute of it, right? Yeah.
The the winter, the the fall andthe spring are amazing, 'cause
it's it's just beautiful weather.
So yeah, it's great. You got to come visit.
Yeah, that's then that's the benefit of it is that, yeah, we
we lost you guys locally, but now we've got somewhere to
travel because we're we're also starting to like branch out our
horizons and do things a little differently.

(04:28):
Like this year has definitely been that that lesson of growth
of how much things are shifting and moving in so many different
ways. That's pretty much the gist of
of everything I wanted to talk to you about today, because
there's so much changing in the world and I don't know about
anybody else who's who's lookingat things, but I'm definitely
feeling it and I know a lot of the people that I have these

(04:48):
types of conversations with, they're definitely feeling it as
well. But yeah, the the shifting, not
only the shifting but the recognizing and integration of
it is just, it seems like it's been the theme and I know with
some of the the the e-mail blasts and the videos that you
send out too, it's been a commonthing that you've talked about a
lot this year too. And I don't know where you want
to dive in on some of that stuff, but you know what's what

(05:11):
has it? How has I guess the crossroads
of your life where you kind of decided to pack up and move and
make that huge change? Like what was the thought
process like and how do you go through such a huge shift in
your life? And and I guess how can you
compare that to what other people have gone through
recently that you might have seen?

(05:32):
Like it seems like it's a thing that seems to keep popping up
for people. Just relocating.
I mean it's actually, you know it actually wasn't that big of a
deal I guess. I guess I'm even we were talking
about before we started rolling how I've been a recluse for the
the last year I've been in the bit of a hermit stage, but I

(05:52):
think I might have been in the bit of a hermit stage before
that because really the the movewasn't that hard minus the fact
that it was a two day drive thatwas intense.
Other than that it was just likea move.
I got my beautiful studio space,got a much bigger studio here
which is amazing. And it it really wasn't that
Matt that bad and that maybe, you know I have.
I have the luxury of I've literally been to every state

(06:15):
except for Alaska. Most of those, you know half a
dozen plus times. Some of them a lot more doing
all the touring. So I like a lot.
A lot of people would always askme like oh wow you moved to
Georgia. What's it like being in the
South? Like like they think it's going
to be like crazy. But people, people are the same
everywhere. That's what I found after after

(06:36):
being on the road for so long. People people people are people.
You know, some, I mean even the political views it, it doesn't
even come up. It's like I think that so much
of that feels contrived, like like we're we're kind of duped
into, especially after moving and hearing all these people's
reactions and and experiencing it first hand and it being like

(06:58):
0. Like no kind of culture shock at
all. For me, you'd have to ask
Jeanine who hasn't traveled as much to me.
But I I don't think she's reallyfeeling it, feeling it either.
But yeah, people are people. Some people are freaking amazing
no matter where they live and and some people are Dicks.

(07:18):
I know like regionally with the way that, you know, I guess some
of the pandemic stuff went down though it was definitely
different regionally. But luckily you guys kind of
went down there once that was all over with.
There were some places like where we're from up here.
I mean, we went to visit you guys up in Maine.
I was expecting it to be way more loose because the majority
of the state of Maine seemed to not be so restrictive.

(07:39):
And then just the tourist area that we went up to go visit you
guys and it was like, oh, wow, this is like just being like in
Massachusetts, it wasn't that much different.
And Massachusetts is, it is its own unique.
Yeah, I won't even dive into it because it gets a little too
political. But I know I think down South it
was a little bit more loosened up when it came to that kind of
stuff. Yeah.
We weren't here during the bruntof it, but it seems like it was

(08:01):
like not a big deal here. It was a big deal in me.
I guess that's one of the thingsthat was kind of like the last
straw, like the the last motivating factor.
I don't know how deep we want togo into that side of things.
I don't know. I'm not afraid anymore.
I mean, honestly, I have. I have to be honest, like,
during a certain portion of starting off this show, you kind
of like you almost didn't want to like offend people.

(08:21):
And I definitely don't want to offend anybody.
I'm still not in the mindset of just being like, well, screw
you, Here's what I think about this.
But I guess I'm a little less, I'm a little a little less
worried about how people are going to react to certain stuff.
And I kind of see myself as moreof a mirror.
If they if they don't like what I'm projecting, the the mirror
might be, you know, the the mirror reflection might be

(08:42):
something they want to look at themselves, 'cause I don't think
I've ever heard anybody's belief, no matter how different
they've been than mine, where I've been deeply offended by
their beliefs. And I think that is like the
core of how much introspection we all should be doing on a
regular basis. You know, we really should all
be approaching things from that standpoint unless their beliefs

(09:03):
are extremely, I guess, intrinsically damaging to us.
Like if someone just said I don't like heterosexual white,
you know, Italian guys who wear glasses and have a podcast whose
name is Heath, I'm gonna be like, well, I kind of have a
problem with that, But I mean, especially another guy like that
that I should talk to. But.

(09:24):
Yeah. Well, I so I we don't.
I don't want to dive into this for too long, but I I definitely
want to say that I have a strong, strong problem with
anybody telling me I have to do anything my whole life.
That's the way I was born. And I was also raised going to a

(09:45):
holistic Dr. Going going to a holistic Dr. I was raised on a
farm where we raised most of ourown food.
So I was never like in the medical system and being kind of
like feeling like I was forced to put something in my body that
I did not want to. I was never going to do it to

(10:06):
begin with because of the way I was raised It just my
programming is is different thanmost people that's it's not just
it's I'm not an anti vaxxer by any means.
I'm a free willer all straight up 100%.
But yeah, when when I I literally, you know, there was
one event that I had in Portlandwhich I had to end up cancelling

(10:27):
because they were requiring people to have that which we
shall leave remain unnamed. He who he who shall not be named
Lord Voldemort or the other V And I was like, I I can't do
that. And yeah, Maine.
Maine was, you know, I grew up in a liberal household, and it

(10:49):
seems like what the definition of that seems to have shifted.
Drastically. The past three years, but we'll
just leave it at with with diving into more fun things
because this has been so killed in the past three years.
And it has. You know, free will you do what
you want to do? And I will support that as long
as you're not hurting anybody else.
And I will do what I would do. And I have my own code of

(11:10):
morality, which I think that would line up with anybody that
came into contact me. Whether you are you know,
whether you're Democratic, Republican, Islamic, Christian,
whatever you are. I think we could hang and be
cool matter what you, you know it's it's that when you have
that vibrational resonance of just being in a good a good
state of resonance, that's what it's all about.

(11:32):
It doesn't matter what the beliefs are.
The beliefs are just programmed into us at this point.
It just seems like they're thereto fuck with us.
Yeah. It's separated.
Yeah. I've I've I've like I said
moving down here open my eyes like I it's it's like all the
people that said like oh you moved there.
What's what's that like Like they were expected it to be like

(11:52):
some horrible thing and it's like it's no other than those
couple things we talked about the slight political differences
and those kind of beliefs that that was actually different.
Supposedly I wasn't hearing thattime but people people are cool.
They I don't. Yeah.
I don't know. It's it's weird.
It definitely seems manipulated and contrived.

(12:13):
It does. I mean, I can see the friction
from where I'm at at this point.If you were where I am
currently, you know this, this state is very, very polarized
when it comes to different things.
And I'd like to just hammer homewhat you said about the free
will because I actually have an episode coming up on this at
some point because it's been, it's been hot on my list.
Because I feel like free will iswhen I they say free will is

(12:35):
fundamental. But I mean I think that free
will is so absolutely fundamental.
I think it's fundamental down toliterally the philosophical
concepts of God. Like free will is necessary.
If the universe put us here as like the nerve cells on the
fingertips of the hand of God, You know if we're out here to

(12:58):
gain experience and be those nerve cells of basically feeling
emotions and whatever else we experience in this life and
almost taking that energeticallyto report that back to the
source that we're all connected to.
You need to have a sense of freewill.
If everything was prescribed. If you're being told what to do,
when to do, then you don't have free will.
And I think that if more of us honored each other's free will

(13:22):
and choices and left the stuff behind that literally does not
affect us directly, this world would be so much more of a
harmonious place. But yeah, I I completely agree
with you that I think a majorityof that kind of stuff is just so
manipulated. You know, strings are pulled
from so many different directions, and it's it's the

(13:43):
great thing about what's been going on, though, by the extent
to which strings are getting pulled is that I think more and
more people are realizing it. Especially the people that I had
written off at some point that might not ever realize it, and
they're starting to all wake up.And that's extremely encouraging
for me, 'cause I was starting tofeel like we're a lost cause,

(14:06):
like humanity's going for another reset.
The only thing we got? Someone's gonna hit the reset
button and shake the snow globe up because we're screwed, you
know? Yeah, I've I've seen the same
thing and a really interesting my I had a really interesting
perception of it in about 2014. I was doing a lot of group work

(14:26):
where groups were, and I'm not, this is pretty sound healing.
Before I was doing sound healingevents, I was holding a space in
through a group of people that were doing all the stuff that I
don't want to get into. But we were doing a lot of stuff
where we're getting together intentionally trying to shift
resonance and shift timelines. And I could see that stuff

(14:48):
starting to pattern out. Like that's when I first started
really noticing it. But at the same time we were
there was there was a group of us that were really getting
together and trying to to createthese shifts, doing it in groups
of people, harvesting that energy and seeing it reflected
out into the world. You know, it comes comes back to

(15:10):
our perception of reality. Is it?
You were kind of as we're trained to be in this world,
we're trained that that the physical reality is, is what is
here in consciousness arises outof that and we have to work
within the limit of construct ofwhat physical reality is.

(15:31):
And that's kind of the that's kind of what we've been working
with for quite a long time back through recorded history.
Whether it's true or not is another story but who knows.
I'm just saying I don't know I don't trust anything anymore.
But we're we're getting to the point where and I I've had this
click in me a long long time agoabout you know physical reality

(15:56):
actually arising out of consciousness and and which is
another whole story but in this day you know pop culture things
like the law of attraction and and all this stuff is is people
are starting to touch on things of that And then also from the

(16:17):
scientific perspective and I heard you talking about this
recently on a podcast with things like the double slit
experiment and like with the stuff with doctor emoto and and
intention how intention is shifting you know with water
specifically in in that but how we're proving especially on the
quantum level that our thoughts are actually shifting and

(16:40):
changing our reality. And through my experiences with
working with the stuff I was talking about doing it with the
group where we get together and do that type of work as a group.
We are so much more immensely powerful if we can just get
together face not necessarily the same direction because maybe
that's that's the all facing thesame direction is fairly

(17:04):
challenging these days but just a similar direction.
I feel like that is enough to create some massive changes and
you know maybe popping open thatcan of conspiracy.
Maybe that's why that we're kindof being kept divided and at
each other's throats, distrusting each other and and
being trained into the perspective that we should be at

(17:27):
odds because our beliefs don't match up.
And if we were together, we would fight where it's
absolutely not true at all. Because if people, if we all did
come together, we could even just, you know, 1% of the world.
If we all came together looking a similar direction, I really, I
think we could shift things likethat.
We're talking, you know, always talking about these great shifts

(17:50):
that are happening, that we're in the midst of the energetic
changing of this time. That is one event which I think
would change everything instantaneously.
Absolutely. I mean, if you consider how much
energy people put into fighting against certain things and it's
one of my favorite concepts everthat I've heard in in several

(18:10):
different circles. But how you'll find so many
people who are protesting against something, protesting
against something. And I think it was Mother
Teresa, one of her favorite famous things where they wanted
her to come to a rally. I think it was against the
Vietnam War or something like that.
They want her to come to a protest against the Vietnam War
and she said, no, I won't do it.But if you have a, if you have a
rally for peace, I'll be there. And it's the the negative.

(18:33):
Like I'm not going to be againstthis thing, but I will be for
something else like having the having the mindset of friction
that you're going to be battlingagainst a certain something is
that sense of division. But when you're for something,
you're unifying with that cause.And it's like that that I feel
like is like, again, that's a foundational concept of that.

(18:54):
But as you look at the larger scales of certain things, like
are you, are you protesting against something that's
actually going to cause some sort of method of change, or are
you going to rally for your the the opposite of the thing you're
protesting against? Are you rallying for this other
thing that you see is a positivething in this world?

(19:15):
And you know, it's one of the things I think that's
discouraged me so much lately insome of the political stuff that
I do, just on small scale, little small town things, but
they're big scale as far as the town goes.
I'm seeing so many people come to the table to fight against
something, whether it's a raise in their taxes, we wanna build
something or whatever, But they don't come with a solution.

(19:35):
They'll only come to battle, butthey will not participate in,
well, we have this problem and Iunderstand you don't want this
solution, but what's the solution?
You are proposing that. I feel like that concept and
that mindset worldwide, just on grander scales of things.
If that were put in place of thebattles and division that were
there, I feel like we would. We would unite so much quicker

(19:58):
and that snowball effect would end up happening so quick that I
think the people who are pullingthose strings were control of
literally everything, the media companies, everything else.
They want to prevent that from happening.
But the great thing I'm seeing is.
It's still happening despite their damnedest efforts, because
they have manufactured, in my opinion, that pandemic and its

(20:18):
extent and its its level of fearthat it produced in a lot of the
statistics and so many differentother things, were definitely
overblown and manufactured. And that goes right up into what
I feel like what's happening with the whole alien disclosure
thing, too. Like I feel they're trying to
make people fearful of it. Like, but what comes after
aliens, Ben? Like.
Like I feel like this is the endgame.
Like what gets more serious thanthem?

(20:40):
That's that's like the Hail Mary.
Yeah. To to to quote one one of our
mutual good friends who's who isjust on your podcast and you
were just on his podcast. Brendan Thomas.
The Lizard Turds. The Lizard turds.
He says that more often than I think I realize.
Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

(21:02):
I mean we're I, I. So going back to what we talked
about two times ago of where we really talked about the raising
of the consciousness of this time, it it really is like a a
last ditch effort. Because I think regardless of
how much they try to manipulate us and we have been heavily,
heavily manipulated in so many ways.

(21:25):
I've, you know, had I had some really, really massive
awakenings to that stuff in my teenage years, and then again in
my, you know, around 2012 I started really waking up.
Especially 2014, I had a really dark night of the soul life

(21:48):
where I started to realize that the whole basis of my
consciousness, a lot of it is a false structure.
The a false false matrix. Reality, I think, is how Amy
Belair, have you been on her podcast yet?
Not yet, but she's amazing. Yeah she's amazing.
So much of the structure of my reality were were based on these

(22:12):
things that were that were not true.
So when you take that away like that doesn't it leaves, it's
difficult at first, it's that's why it's a Dark nighted soul.
It's difficult because but firstof all when you start to like
pull that stuff away, a lot of panic starts to come up.
In my experience, like I had a lot.
This is coming off of a really, really amazing experience that I

(22:34):
had in the summer of 2014, whichI believe we did talk about at
one point. But as I went through that
amazing experience, I went through a Dark Night of the soul
afterwards where I had all theserealizations.
It was actually the Dark Knighted Soul that made me
realize that those were the cause of that.
But having the structure, it's been in this, the structure for

(22:57):
my state of consciousness, that's been ingrained into me
and trained into me by going through so many years of school
and just having to survive in this society.
Coming to the realization that it was all false is, or a lot of
it is false, puts you in a in a tough place, ultimately a much

(23:17):
better place. But yeah, I think I think you've
probably been through some some very similar things.
Very, yeah. And The Dark Knight of Soul is
no fun. What do you what do you feel
like was the the general theme around yours, 'cause I can point
to two different significant ones in my life with the weird
part about it was they were seven years apart.
You know the seven-year cycles that they talk about in some

(23:38):
philosophical circles. Mine were seven years apart and
seven years from the last one isthe year that Mason, my son,
turns 18, graduates from high school.
So it's like, oh boy, I can see this one on the horizon and.
Wait, wait, when's that? 25 S 25.
OK, let's come wow, he's he's getting.
Old he is. He's gonna be 16 in a couple

(23:59):
weeks. So.
But what was the theme around your dark night of the soul when
you went through one? If you even want to talk about
it was 'cause I know that you'vegone through like the shifts of
the the rock'n'roll world wasn't, I think, everything you
thought it was going to be. We were kind of talking about
that last night with with the whole group that we were in.
But like you dream about this, this thing your whole life and

(24:22):
your childhood, and then get outthere and you realize it's
sleeping in a tour bus and not having any freedom and not
having. A shower.
Yeah, you know, like, so was. Was it that or was it something
else? Like what?
What was the general theme of that dark night of the soul?
Like what? What did you go into and what
did you come out of it with? In in 2014 it was completely
different, 'cause I I kind of went through that in 2009, 2010,

(24:45):
Cause Ross stopped touring. We we did our last, like,
lengthy tour in 2008. We toured a little bit in 2009,
2010, 2011. I like that was my first 1st
post rock star rock bottom, 'cause I I literally went from,
you know, having a house and in a yard and and going out and
doing tours to and being in a relationship.

(25:08):
All of it crumbled at once. Like, of course, you know, very
coincidental that all crumbled at once, crumbled at once in
retrospect, but it all crumbled at once.
And I, you know, I had to. I started just exploring a lot
of different things and that ledme to ultimately to where I am
now. But in 2014 it was I had already

(25:29):
started. I had a couple years of
spiritual pursuits, not really just pursuits, but spiritual
pursuits. Working with group energy, not
with sound yet. Working with some sound on
myself but but not with groups. But working with shifting,
shifting, resonance, shifting timelines.

(25:50):
Like like what I was talking about in the beginning that that
had been going on for a couple years and I had an amazing
awakening experience in in the summer of 2014, which I'm pretty
sure we talked about. Amazing, amazing experience.
I don't remember what episode wetalked about that on, so I don't

(26:11):
need to dive too back into it, but I just had like to to go
very briefly. I'd call it in.
In retrospect. I started calling it a micro
ascension experience because I had nine days where I was here
in this world with the same people that I was always with.
But I was like in a in a different level of reality,
having a completely different experience, 100% total complete,

(26:34):
different state of consciousness.
Although I still had, you know, as much memories as I have now
intact for this lifetime at thatpoint.
And that massively shifted my perception and my my state of
consciousness shifting like that, expanding like that.

(26:56):
And this is one of the things wewanted to talk about.
So it's a good segue actually. You know, when when that
happens, we shift our state of consciousness.
As our consciousness opens up, it doesn't go back.
What happens is we create, you can look at it as as we create
more space in our in our consciousness to hold more to

(27:19):
have a broader perspective to access the multi dimensionality
of existence. What also happens is as you
expand all that denser energy all that shit that we accumulate
starts to have room to come to the surface.
So a lot of times what happens, I've noticed with people,
because I do a lot of energy work with with people for the

(27:41):
past decade, we feel, we raise our vibration up and we feel
amazing. But then it it feels like it
crashes and we're like, ah, whatdid I do wrong?
You know, why am I having this horrible experience?
I thought I had it all figured out.
What I've come to see is as we expand our consciousness and it
stays that way, that stuff starts to come to the surface

(28:04):
and that is actually a good thing.
It's not a constant evolution ofstaying, moving forward,
constantly going up, it's expanding, releasing this stuff,
having it be able to be transmuted so you can expand
more. So it's it's more of like an
upwards cycle or upwards, upwards spiral that rather than
a than a straight line. And having the understanding of

(28:27):
that changed the way I view all these denser things come on
coming up in myself and in others immensely.
Because I'm, I'm like, oh, you got a lot of shit coming up
right now. Nice, man.
You're doing some good stuff. You're you're you got it going
on. You're figuring it out.
Because that's that, you know? Because in retrospect also, I

(28:48):
realized that all the stuff thathappened to me that was
absolutely horrible. Like in 2009, 2010, when Ross
stopped touring and I stopped having income and my my
relationship broke up at the same time.
And I ended up living at my mom's house for a while from
from being a rock star. And it was horrible at the time.
So I was like heartbroken and and bank broken and in

(29:11):
retrospect, you know, that was actually a great time of growth
at that point and it set the fertilizer in in place for some
massive, massive growth. That happened really from from
2011 started having inklings of Awakenings and Reawakenings.

(29:32):
2012 was about that a lot. And in 2013 I was just the whole
my, my like job became the spiritual work.
And I think that's when you started seeing my posts in 2012
and 2013 that you're talking about, that you've talked about
in the past. And by the time 2014 came, I
just been doing, it was like my day, it was like my job.
That was all I was doing. I was working with people,

(29:53):
working with what I was doing, abunch of us doing it together.
And I had that massive experience all at once.
My consciousness expanded quite a lot, but it released a whole.
The massive experience of expansion brought a massive
experience of release, which wasa very large documented soul.

(30:16):
That happened in the fall of 2014, and a lot of it was based
around finances, You know, that was a lot of what I was panicked
about, not having enough money because I hadn't, you know, I
literally, during from 2012, 2013, 2014, I was so focused on
the spiritual pursuits. I was only teaching guitar like

(30:37):
two days a week. And that was my whole income.
Very living, very frugally, which was great until you hit
that dark place where you're like in panic, like, I don't own
a house, I don't have a savings account.
What am I doing seeing all my friends, like, they have houses
and nice cars and you know, havea family.
And I'm like in in just that societal programming of like, I

(30:58):
don't have the right stuff. I don't have the stuff that I
never mind that I had. I can say this next it feels
like a different lifetime. I had been like massively
successful in a lot of people would probably think I was the
most successful person that theyknew.
But I felt like such a failure. And I feel like that's one of

(31:20):
those things that are ingrained into us to keep us down.
And that was starting to come tothe surface.
Like that's not the stuff that matters.
And something that I that I I distilled it down to a meme
around that period of time whichis you know what if our highest

(31:41):
level of value, our our currencywas actually our level of
consciousness, what would that look like, you know?
And that's when I had that realization that that not only
are we tricked into placing all of our manifestation skills into
a middleman, which is the finances, which, don't get me

(32:03):
wrong, I have nothing against money.
I enjoy having it and spending it and living life, and I do a
lot of things to make it becauseit's it's an easy medium to
exchange. But if that's the goal, I feel
like that is a trap. And you get trapped in cycles of
greed, which you can see reflected out into the world so,
so heavily. With people having enough money

(32:24):
to live 10 lifetimes still in places of being in perpetual
greed. To this to the place where it's
like it's it's troubling and disgusting You know that one
person can have an enough money to feed everybody in the world
and it's a tricky spot because I've also come to realize and

(32:44):
just totally shifting gears likehere's a 180 but I've also come
to distrust like open handouts as well.
So it's it's like a tough place we need to find like I don't I
don't trust like the government having like basic the basic
income. I don't just because, like, what
do you have to do to get it? If if it was like altruistic,

(33:08):
yeah. But like I said, total 180, just
like we're just on a different road now.
But I yeah, going backtracking for the 180.
But yeah, the dark night of the soul it was, it was about a
whole lot of shit. But it was really manifested
through the fear of not having enough finances through the

(33:32):
programming of not having a house, not having you know, the
$50,000 car and and all that which I, which I felt like I at
that point in time, I felt like I should have because I've I've,
I've, you know, sold hundreds ofthousands of albums and and had
a, you know, it was, it was AI was seeing the cage that I was
in. And I was ultimately able to get

(33:52):
out of it. And through that, I started
maneuvering into what I'm doing now, which is the the sound work
that I've been doing for the past eight years or however long
it's been. Isn't it.
Isn't it amazing, though, how they may not necessarily be
things that we want? It may not necessarily be a

(34:16):
portion of our life that we evenwant to adopt, but we feel like
we have to have it just because it's some sort of a societal or
family norm or something like that.
You know I've I know people who are you know they have they have
more kids maybe than they wantedto have or you know they they
have to you know the the career things kind of cliche.
You know some family members have a legacy of you know

(34:37):
medical or firefighters or whatever.
You know they they feel forced to go and do something.
And I I can relate to so much ofwhat you said, so much because I
think my early career choices were not so much forced on me.
But it was like almost like at acertain point I wasn't allowed
to stop because there were so many eyeballs looking at me and

(34:59):
kind of like pushing me forward.But, you know, I've talked about
it so many times and I hate you talking about the same stuff
over and over again. But it's, I feel like I know
exactly what you're saying abouthow you, I guess, feel like
you're supposed to be somewhere.But then you go through that
shit and dig and then you realize, like, you know what?
I I don't think I even wanted tobe there.

(35:21):
So what the hell am I worried about not being there for?
I'm not in a place that I don't even really give two shits about
not being in that place. Like, I want to be over there,
but I'm so worried that I didn'tgo over there.
I'm going to go back towards that direction just because
someone else is making me feel like I need to go that way.

(35:41):
And I think you need to basically have that massive
energy release and that breakdown that you're talking
about because I know exactly what you mean.
I've gone through a couple of them, two different.
One of them was like a phase of who am I as a person?
You know, what is my mortality? What's it going to be like if I
die? All that kind of stuff.
And then the second one was likeshifting out of that whole
career thing. So it was like the whole

(36:02):
breakdown of very fundamental, like who am I deep down inside?
And then on the backside of all those things, it was just, I
guess, an expansiveness that I can't even describe.
And I guess if you've never gonethrough, you don't really know,
but if you've gone through it, you know exactly what I'm
talking about. I know exactly what you're
talking about. Like just from, you know, my

(36:23):
perspective of of very differentcareer of being a rock musician.
But it was like why was IA rock musician?
Because I I like music. Like I wouldn't.
I didn't sit in my room and write songs.
I was, I was playing playing sounds and kind of traveling on
the sounds and I would do it forgroups of people, friends in
high school, you know, just creating, creating cool sounds

(36:46):
and textures and everybody just kind of tripping out on it.
And that's what I love doing. But society was very clear that
if you want to be a musician, you better write some songs and
get them on the radio. Otherwise you're going to be,
you're going to be working at McDonald's.
Yeah, pretty much. So I was like, all right, I'll,
you know, and I think we talked about that story the very first

(37:09):
time I was on your podcast. But I was like, all right,
that's got to be the focus. So that's what I'll do.
And ultimately, you know, it it didn't make me as happy as I
thought it should have. Don't get me wrong.
There was some amazing experiences and I've I've LED
such a beautifully bizarre life because I've had such such

(37:31):
experiences that are so out of the norm.
Like I've never held a day job. I mean, I worked in a warehouse
for like a year at one point part time while I was, while I
was playing in a different band.But you know I've I've always
just 100% been into what I'm doing and believed in myself and
gone for it and but yeah what I was going for was kind of

(37:56):
disconnected from my my reason for actually wanting to do it in
the 1st place because of what I had been told I had to do to get
it. And I was.
I was always I was you know not to complain like oh poor me, I
was AI was a fucking rock star. But I was never I was never
extremely happy and like I said don't get me wrong I had some

(38:17):
amazing experiences and and did a lot of travelling and played
everywhere. But you know ultimately it
wasn't it wasn't what it needed to be.
It wasn't, it wasn't scratching the itch of the depths inside of
me of why I was here. Like, I didn't come here to be a
rock star. It wasn't my Dharmic path, but

(38:38):
it was a very, very good way to get me working towards that
direction ultimately. So yeah, stepping, stepping away
from that was challenging because like, I had a career and
I was successful at it. And that's why when Ross stopped
touring in like 2009, 2010, it'slike, what am I going to do?
Well, I'll start another band because I don't know what the

(38:59):
hell else to do, but I wasn't really into it, you know, It's
just like I was doing it becauseI felt like I had to and that's
what people expected of me. And at the same time, I, you
know, I started exploring in more ambient sounds as time went
on and started exploring. Ultimately sound healing and

(39:21):
doing that and doing it for myself, but being mortified of
sharing it with anybody and and going out there and doing it
because I was. I was a real musician.
I can't that woo woo stuff. What do they think?
I spent so long building up, building up, having a career,
What? Why would I?
I don't want to destroy that. And yeah, that was that was a
thing. And even after I had been doing

(39:42):
sound healing events like full time for a while, I still wasn't
like really putting myself out there on social media because it
was still that stigma of like, Idon't want to destroy what I
had, even though I had already walked away from it.
It's like that weird place of having a hard time letting go of
something that society told you you wanted.

(40:03):
Yeah, no. And I totally get that.
Like the the one thing I wanted to to to to ask you about
because I'm looking at you know totally again, totally different
career paths and stuff like that.
But I look at sort of what my aspirations were a long time ago
and reaching heights beyond whatmy imagination even pictured for

(40:26):
me. You know, I I thought my life
was going to go in a certain direction and I ended up hitting
highs far beyond that bar that Iwas even setting for myself.
And that the previous role I dida bunch of cool stuff with the
the whole art crime thing. Like I couldn't have told you I
was ever going to do that. So like.
They can make movies about you. I, you know that someone
actually said that they were like, you know, you should write
a book about that whole thing sometime.

(40:46):
Like, I don't know if I can, I don't know what part of
confidentiality agreements and stuff.
But yeah, you know, maybe someday, maybe someday.
But, you know, it even has me thinking of like all the way
down to what am I doing right now?
And I've got these these I guessaspirations of Grainger.
I would love to see this podcastjust keep on skyrocketing it

(41:07):
keeps every time I see stats it's bigger and bigger and so
totally honored for that. But again like the conversation
we were having in our we have this small little exclusive
group of where we're we're you know me and Ben and and Brandon
and a few other people are bouncing some where are we what
do we what do we need to do get unstuck.
Heath what is your challenges right like right now And it was
our first conversation of that kind of stuff last night in our

(41:29):
little private group and Ben waskind of the subject like he was
the one on the couch. But I'm sitting there getting
all this value off of exactly what the the other people in the
room were giving Ben for advice.And I'm sitting there listening
to it like man, Oh my God. And it I had to sit with it just
like you said. Like you had to sit and and

(41:50):
unpack a lot of that informationand so did I.
So I'm getting at it with is. I'm like, OK, So what is it?
I actually picture my day in my life looking like in the future,
And how? How does the road I'm on right
now lead to that? And do I actually want that?
You know, like you have to sit and actually think about what
your dreams actually are. Like, First off, dream, dream.

(42:12):
Everybody out there have a dream.
I don't care if you've been a rock star, like, what's your
next dream, Ben? You know, So, like, that's what
I'm getting at is like, what does your next dream look like?
And how bad do you even really want to call that in?
Like, what does it look like when that dream comes here?
Because if you pour enough energy into it, it's it's likely
going to come. More likely than not, if you
pour your heart and soul into it, that that energy is going to

(42:34):
magnetize that thing right to you.
So be ready for it. Yeah, yeah.
And I really the past I have to do math in my head.
The past six years that I've been doing sound healing full
time, like as my main gig have been the most fulfilling years
of my life. Like, I've I've had experiences

(42:55):
going back to like when I was 17that kind of culminated into
like that, at least for this portion, that portion of my
life, this portion of my life. That is why I was here, to work
with sound codes in the way I amto help people navigate these
times of shifting, because I hada lot of information that I was

(43:16):
talking about for years. Like you've heard me talk about
at every event you ever came. Because I always talk about
semantics and how energies were shifting and how this time is a
time of great change. And you know, it kind of felt
like it at the time, but it was just like it was something in
instilled into me that that deeper knowing like something is

(43:36):
coming and you know you go through times where you're like
I'm always talking about this, but am I like am I just full of
shit? And then 2020 hits like we're
there, we've been there. Things, things are shifting
hardcore and it continues to shift.
You know, things started shifting and from my perspective

(43:57):
a lot in 2012, things started toshift in 2013.
It started to really cycle up in2014 is when I had my own
personal massive experience and then kind of riding that wave
and totally shifting who I was in that time.
You know, going into doing the sound work, working with people,
working with energy, working with sound in ways so completely

(44:20):
different than writing songs andhaving so many people have such
profound experiences. Hearing about it being like,
wow, like half the time you're like, I don't even know what to
say. That's that's amazing.
Thank you for sharing and but kind of riding that wave of of
2012 up until really this year, 2013, because in 2012 I remember

(44:46):
a lot of times I would be feeling like I'd be sitting down
to try and meditate 20/12/2013, probably more 2013 and feeling
like this undercurrent of almost.
It's not anxiety, like I'm anxious about something, but
like this jittery feeling insidemyself, like something.
Something just like not being able to settle and feeling a
little bit antsy. And I've been feeling that again

(45:11):
this year. I I noticed that maybe it
started last fall in 2022. I think I remember talking about
it with with Amy Blair, but I'vebeen feeling that and I
recognize it from when I was really feeling it back then.
I feel like things are cycling up again, like with like with
somatics that that I've talked about so many times, how the

(45:32):
pattern that we've been holding is starting to come apart a
little bit. And me, I I feel like I was
going to say, and maybe it's just me, but I've I've heard
enough people talking about and talking about it and
corroborating what I've been thinking that I don't think it's
just me. But things are starting to that
pattern is starting to break up a little bit, like the frequency
is rising enough. Like if you're feeling familiar

(45:53):
with cymatics, and I know you'vetalked about it on your show
many times in case anybody listening hasn't listened
before. Cymatics.
One of the most popular ways of showing it that you'll find on
the Internet if you look it up cymatics is when, when you take
a sheet of metal, attach a speaker to it.

(46:15):
Play pure tone frequencies through the, you know, through
the speaker, vibrating the sheetof metal, and sprinkle some kind
of sand or powder on the sheet of metal.
And at specific resonant frequencies these these patterns
form and all of the particles are moving and flowing, but
they're moving and flowing together, holding a very
specific pattern. But as the frequency shifts, as

(46:35):
it starts to raise up, the pattern starts to dissolve into
chaos, at least what it what seems like chaos from from our
perspective here in this 3D reality, it's all the particles
are moving without any relation and it just looks like a chaotic
mess until you get to the next frequency that holds a resonance
that a pattern, a pattern just like snaps in and you have

(46:57):
another beautiful pattern, pattern taking shape.
And to me with the that jittery feeling I feel like that's what
happened in 20/12/2013 and that was also a very potent time for
a lot of other people and it wasalso like you know the whole
Mayan calendar thing but that's the other thing.
But it feels like we're we're onthe cusp of another big change

(47:20):
And it I just like feel that andmaybe you know that's why I've
been so hermity these these these past since since moving
here. Especially because I'm I'm like
I'm just sitting with it and I've I've been through it before
and rather than like being like what's wrong with me why can't I
just settle down after you know years of practicing meditation

(47:44):
Why can't I just settle on beinglike all right I think I think
something's coming and I'm just going to keep doing what I'm
doing and keep offering things in the way that I am that will
be in service to the shifting when the time comes when people
need it. Because I feel like that's also
important. You know, no matter who you are,
no matter what you're doing, youcan utilize what you already

(48:04):
have in your life. What you already have is your
job in ways of service to helping other people to navigate
these shifting times. And that, you know, for me it
was always sound, vibration, always music.
So I've been, I've been working on that and it was just kind of
like a directive, you know, why are you doing what you're doing?
Is it because you know so many people, That's another thing.

(48:24):
So many people hate their jobs And that's so unfortunate.
And I I don't have any answers because I certainly don't.
I I don't even feel like I'm qualified to talk about that
because I've had such. I haven't always had a lot of
money, but I've always like, I have to do what I'm going to do
or I will die trying. Like if I'm going to play music,

(48:45):
that's all I'm going to do. I'm not going to, I'm not going
to work a 40 hour a week job andtry and play music.
I'm going to play freaking music.
And I'm going to live in the band's rehearsal studio, which I
literally did with RA looking ona couch with cockroaches calling
on me like I'm in it. I I I never got into a situation
where I had a job that I hated and someone else had control

(49:08):
over me. I always maintain freedom of my
life. But I see so many people in that
situation, and that's what people are asking about that a
lot. Like how do I get out of that?
Like, I I don't know. I feel like we're getting to a
place with the resonance that we're holding as a society.
We're shifting where so many people are finding ways to get

(49:29):
out of that. So I think it's coming.
I think, you know, whether whether it's finding something
completely new and finding that magical thing moving into the
thing that you've always wanted to do.
Maybe that's not even it. Like the thing that I thought I
always wanted to do didn't end up resonating the way I thought
it would. It was actually something
completely different related. But when it comes down to it

(49:54):
complete opposite end of the spectrum you know.
But yeah why why are we here doing what we're doing.
I I think there's so many of us that are here at this time
specifically to help at this time of shifting and I know I am
I've known that since I was a teenager I you know
understanding galactic cycles was was we we talked about this

(50:18):
in in December of 2020 on this on this on this podcast about
galactic cycles and and being ina time where our whole solar
system is in a place entered into an energetic cloud.
We're in alignment with the centre sun where of of the
Galaxy where we're being subjected to much higher
frequencies and the way that plays out on a physical level.

(50:40):
You can see it in the sun with all the solar flares that you
see how human resonance of the planet shifting.
But what it ultimately comes down to those are the physical
representations. But being that we're starting to
understand that our our state ofconsciousness is actually
creating the physical world. You can understand that these
shifting energies are actually shifting our state of
consciousness. And that's why people, That's

(51:02):
why whether or not I have the answers for you, I can say
probably why it's happening. I don't know to tell you how to
how to quit the job you hate. But why it's happening is
probably because your consciousness has expanded to a
point where you're no longer feeling in alignment with the
thing that you've been doing forso long as a means to make ends
meet as a cog in someone else's wheel and to realize that we're

(51:26):
all at a point where the shifting is happening.
So even if you don't know know what you're going to do, there's
so many people in the same exactboat, the same exact position of
feeling these changes, feeling the shifting, that there's a lot
of tension around that. Ultimately, that bubble has to
burst. You know we we can't have so
many people feeling like slaves and having other people running

(51:48):
around with billions of dollars and the freedom to do anything
they want to to you know go to Mars or or whatever.
Great. But it's so imbalanced and I I
feel like you know with this shifting of energies that's one
of those bubbles that is is going to pop because it has to
pop. And you know one of the things I

(52:10):
think about a lot, especially when I'm, I'm worried about it,
it's like you know does does this cause back in 2012 I was
like yeah everything shifting 2013, 2014, like the whole world
is going to we're going to be ascended by like by like 2015
it's all going to be good. We're there man.
But. Did happen.

(52:32):
But then you know, you still going through cycles and like
how long does this process take?Does it take another five years?
Does it take another 500 years? You know, I don't know.
I feel like it's not going to take another 500 years, but
that's also, I don't want it to take a 5, another 500 years.
So, you know, I I feel like, butI, you know, like I said
something big is on the horizon.And do we ever get to the point

(52:55):
where we do feel like we've arrived?
Because if I don't know, maybe maybe it's just always a journey
in evolution of consciousness. When we're here, we're really
refined down to a place where our we're we're in such a dense
state that our sliver of consciousness that we have
available to us, filtering our our Oversoul consciousness
coming down to this little teenyspeck of light.

(53:17):
Like, here's what you have the knowledge of.
And now we're going to have thisbig expansion.
Here's still. Still.
Microscopic. It's interesting.
Keep going. Oh yeah, I don't want to, yeah,
I want you to talk too. But.
But I feel like that's what's going on right now and that the

(53:38):
experience that we're having here in this, in this density is
different from we come here and we're behind the veil so to say.
But with the shifting, the veil is lifting and that's why so
many people are starting to channel and starting to download
information and that's like common speak these days.
I started channelling or downloading information in the

(53:59):
90s. I didn't tell anybody I was
like, this is fucking weird. I I I'm like having
conversations and getting all this knowledge.
And I I I wrote a really long blog post about that, something
that I had been apprehensive of sharing for many years back in
the in the fall I wrote a reallylong blog post about that.

(54:20):
But I I I started getting all this information and it was
really weird and I didn't talk about it for years and I felt
like I wasn't supposed to. But now, like so many people are
having these same exact experiences.
So, like, I feel like it's abouttime I I got off my ass and
started talking about it. Because we that's another thing
we need to do is open up to eachother and share the things that

(54:41):
are going on in our lives that are outside of the societal
things that we've been taught, that we're supposed to live
within these these little boundaries.
When all the stuff is happening out here, it's time to open up
and share that stuff without without feeling like we're going
to be labeled as woo, woo or crazy.
And I've I've stepped over that line far too many times to step
back and I think, I think you'restarting to get there yourself.

(55:04):
I am, you know, and that and that's one of the greatest that
used to so much stuff that I want to definitely hammer on.
But that is one of the greatest things I think that's coming out
right now is that a lot of people, I I think I've just said
this even recently on this podcast to do this episode right
now, that people I might have written off that weren't ever
going to get it in this lifetimeor you know, they're just not
going to get it and they're going to have to come back and

(55:24):
repeat it. If that's what really happens,
you know, they're starting to come up with ideas, concepts and
everything else that completely shocked me.
You know, people who I never thought would listen to this
show listen to it and we talk about it.
You know, my father is one of them who I I don't know if he
necessarily listens. I think he maybe pokes into some
of the stuff that I might post on social media or whatever, but

(55:46):
definitely like gets some of theconcepts and just not one of the
people that I think would would be into it.
But I think more of the, like the life enjoyment type stuff
are the things that I see him and other people sort of
integrating. But even when it comes down to
the stuff that is woo woo. I was so absolutely scared of
that judgement and especially when I first started this

(56:08):
podcast, I didn't tell anybody about it.
I mean I think when you finally came on was the very the first
time you came on was the very first time that I think that I
had invited. I think I had a couple people
on, but it was like one of the the first times I had somebody
on who I'm like, OK, if I have been on, you better be ready for
that shit because it's likely going to get in front of many

(56:30):
more eyes and ears. So is this really what you want?
Like that whole what does this look like in the future?
Because if you're going to call it in, you got to be ready for
what that looks like. And it took me a while to
integrate that like it really did.
And it still was like I was shrinking myself down.
And just like that conversation we had last night, you know,
what are you doing to hold yourself back?

(56:51):
And a lot of the times, it's us.Like the things that hold us
back in our lives are exactly what you just talked about was
the fear of it being called Boo Boo and everything else.
But these conversations are becoming so much more
mainstream. And because of that, I think
more people are diving deeper into what our reality actually
is, what life, what this existence, the reason why we

(57:13):
were put in this meat suit for the amount of time that we're
here. Why are we here and what is it
that we're doing? And when people do that, they're
also digging underneath these false fences that the people who
do have more money than they know what to do with and are
manipulating the world. We're seeing those false borders
for what they are, and we're going under them, over them and
around them. And that's happening more

(57:34):
frequently to the point where I think this, again, the whole
thing with the alien stuff, I think it's an act of desperation
because it's like, why tell us now, you know why?
Why admit after 70 years, 80 years that you ruined people's
lives, likely killed numerous people to keep the secret, and
now all of a sudden, like, it's cool to talk about and shoot
them down And, you know, yeah, it does.

(57:56):
So you know, I guess what I'm getting at is like, things are
absolutely shifting and changing, but for people to
integrate all of this information and be not only OK
with it and how that's going to be perceived.
And again, I guess a version, a shade of that whole the world's
telling me to go over there. This is kind of a similar thing.

(58:18):
Like the world's telling you, hey, Ben, this is what it means
to go be a rock star. It's the same thing where hey,
Ben, you're gonna be woo woo if you go over there.
Like, OK, well that's where I'm going because this stuff
fascinates me. And to live a life in a in a
direction that's not that direction is, that's not that
doesn't feel good in here. It's not in resonance with me.
And I think if more people sat down with what actually feels

(58:44):
good, not what your family's telling you to do for a job.
And it's. But what feels good?
And it's not always Sorry to cutyou off, but I I want to say
this before I forget like we're talking about before we hit
record like a lot of times I'll like.
Just say it but the most. Important in far more than what
feels good is what the combination of what excites you

(59:04):
and terrified like 100% of the time with people that I've
worked with or talked to. That is the path that
ultimately, like blows things wide open.
Like what? Oh my God, I want to do that.
But fuck no, that horrified. That's.
This. That's that's the path that was,
that was, that was me with with sound healing, using my like

(59:26):
playing the balls. Yeah, sure, whatever.
I could sit down and do that. But actually opening up and
using my voice, I did that for myself for years before I ever
did that. In in front of anybody that I
didn't trust very intimately because it was horrifying.
And I also really wanted to. I felt like I want to do that,
but it like it took me, it took me a couple of years to actually

(59:46):
to do it. And the only reason I did it was
because I kept getting offered gigs to do sound healing and all
my other income dried up like this happened.
Like I I think I talked about this on a past podcast.
I guess I've the more I come on here, I'm gonna have to say that
more and more. Some people who might not have
listened to the previous ones, but we'll link them in the show

(01:00:07):
notes. So you can check out the other
ones, but yeah, I lost my own train of thought.
But but you were. You were basically funneled into
this because your other means ofbeing started trying, yeah?
Yeah, all my guitar lessons. Because I was.
I was still teaching two days a week for for several years.
Like wholly focused on spiritualpursuits, on on just finding

(01:00:34):
paths of awakening and whatever the whatever you want to call
it, whatever words you like to choose.
And working two days a week, making just enough money to
survive, to survive and and livemy life comfortably enough to
and have all that free time. But all my guitar students dried
up within like a matter of a couple weeks.
Which was quite synchronistic because it, like a lot of them

(01:00:59):
had been with me for years and years.
And it was just like, it wasn't like they were like, I can't do
this anymore. It was like, it was it.
They all had good reasons and they're all like, I want to come
back. I don't really want to stop.
But it all dried up at once and I kept getting offered gigs to
do sound. And so I was just like,
eventually I was like, all right, I'll, I'm going to book

(01:01:19):
some events and try doing what Ido at home for myself in front
of an audience. And that's absolutely
horrifying. And I know how I work.
So I'm going to book 3 instead of one in case the first one
sucks. So I'm forced to do it three
times to get a good deal for it.But they.
Yeah. And then they all went
phenomenally well and literally within a matter of a couple

(01:01:44):
months or less, that was my mainsource of income.
Well, I mean, I guess that wasn't very hard because all my
income dried up, but it was actually I was, I was, I was
starting to survive comfortably on it like really quickly.
It was like it rolled right out and was very, very amazing in
beyond just it working out. It was like it was meant to be.

(01:02:07):
You know, and and one other thing, it's it's, it's amazing
how everything that you've talked about, I mean we talk a
lot about these dates. Like, you know, your dates are
very significant to you, certainyears and turns, certain time
periods. Like you'll never forget those
for the rest of your life. And I can kind of remember
similar ones with me. But you, you look at where your
life was in those really tough moments and you see in a very

(01:02:28):
short turn around of time like how much better that's gotten.
But in those moments, in those lows, it's literally the worst
of the worst. And I think one of the main
reasons why I wanted to start this show is because there were
times where I had the worst of the worst years.
And within a year, I'm literallyin the opposite end of the

(01:02:50):
spectrum away from where that was.
And I'm doing something that if I would have just known a year
prior that it was going to be this good, just within a year,
that low wouldn't have been so bad, right?
I mean, it was, it was so many different times that that's
happened. So it's like just one big thing
that I like to put out there forpeople is that if you're in one

(01:03:11):
of those lows, you're in one of those really nasty low down
places. Likely that energy is going to
come and release at a very near point and within a very short
amount of time you're in a completely different place.
So you know, you just all you have to do is open yourself up
to it. You have to dream a little bit.
You have to just be hopeful sometimes.
You just literally have to make it through the day that you're

(01:03:32):
in and just try and get a good night's sleep and start again
tomorrow. Because tomorrow could literally
be the day it turns around. And I've had this, I've had this
conversation with people who I've either coached all the way
up to, someone who I've literally pulled off the railing
of a bridge back in the day and just said that, you know,
tomorrow could be the start of the step up from the very rock

(01:03:54):
bottom that you were in. And within a very short amount
of time you're at a high that you never could have dreamed of.
But if you don't wake up tomorrow, that's never going to
happen. And so most people who are at
the end of their ropes, they feel like their dreams have
falling apart. Whether it's a marriage, a job,
just everything. It's like, OK, well, what a
great opportunity you have at this point in your life to

(01:04:15):
literally be at a point you'll never be at again because you're
at rock bottom and your gut, Youknow, it could get worse.
Like, you could go blind on top of everything.
You know, you can have a horrible accident and like,
things can always really get worse.
Just don't. Don't welcome that.
And your life can be so much better in such a short amount of
time. And I will speak from the
experience of myself, from Ben Carroll, from so many other

(01:04:38):
different people who have said the same exact thing and been
through these circumstances. Like, yeah, I don't ever want to
go through it again. But man, I'm I'm so glad I did.
Because a very short amount of time later, my life turned into
something I didn't know I wantedand couldn't even have dreamed
of. And I'm so glad I'm there.
Yeah, yeah. And if you're there, I've been

(01:05:00):
there and some things that have helped me which which I'd I'd
like to share are one, sit down every morning and write down
three things that you're grateful for and try and
actually feel those things you know is is simple as your cats
like I'm grateful for my cats because they're really fucking

(01:05:21):
hilarious or or whatever it is. But starting start a practice of
doing that everyday, feeling grateful for that.
And sometimes you might have to force yourself to it, but that
will literally just for those 5 minutes that will literally
start to shift your energy and that will start to expedite the

(01:05:42):
process of finding your way out of that dark night of the soul
that you're in. I, I, I firmly believe that
that's that's definitely a powerful practice.
It sounds, it sounds so simple and it almost sounds so cliche
like oh, gratitude. But it's it's not it's not the
words about gratitude. It's actually the state of
resonance that you hold where like that's that's almost like

(01:06:05):
being able to hold the state of unconditional love, which is a
very, very high variation. Feeling grateful for something
in that way, just feeling gratitude that it exists in your
life opens something up within you, shifts your energy and
allows those pathways to connectin in a definitely a more
expedited way. And the second thing is another

(01:06:28):
practice I did was watch for thenegative thought processes.
And I had a whole ton of them. And you know, being here in this
density, I think we all always have that to a certain degree.
But doesn't mean you have to have it to the extent that you
may, if you're in that place, like, oh, my life sucks.

(01:06:48):
I hate this. This person just won't give me a
break. Or you know, even less about
someone else, but more about thethings you're finding in
yourself. Just what I did was I put
together like a series of sentences which I I actually
wrote down and printed out and Ithink I have in my.
I know I have because I've I've bumped into it many times in my

(01:07:11):
desk. Still still, where I would I
would actually catch myself be like that's not something I
actually want to be repeating tomyself.
And I would go through the list just saying it in my head and I
would do that. And it became like a habit.
I had it memorized. I would be like I would catch
myself and at some point I I wasable to release a lot of those

(01:07:32):
negative patterns, those negative thought patterns,
because those are also holding you in a cycle of creating that
negative resonance of of creating that reality.
And at the same time, don't get me wrong, don't feel like you
have to control every single thought in your life because
that'll drive you crazy in its own way.
It's that being that can when you're consistently berating

(01:07:52):
yourself and telling yourself you're worthless or and stuff in
that vein of things like you can, you can at least go through
the motions of saying things that you want to be true that
you might not feel or true in the moment.
But replacing that and that is astepping stone to get some

(01:08:14):
forward momentum towards releasing that.
And it it worked for me. You know, I I I did that.
And I did it very consistently and of course not perfectly
because I'm, I'm still human as well.
But I don't think you have to beperfect.
You just have to. It's like driving a car.
You're not always like straight error on the road.
You're like, yeah, I'm in the lines.

(01:08:35):
Sometimes, not sometimes. But yeah, I mean, you're never
in a straight line. You're always, you know, slight
course corrections and you don'teven notice because you're still
going the direction you want to be.
Same thing, you know, figuring out those ways to course
correct. I think the the striving for
perfection, you know, it's I always set the bar really high.
I set it really high for me. I set it really high for my

(01:08:56):
team. That works for me and stuff.
It's OK if we don't get it. And I I hate saying that because
I don't want people to have the expectation of like, hey, I'm
going to set the bar up here, but don't try to reach it, you
know, because if you reach that bar and you go over it like, Oh
my God, what an absolute amazingachievement if you were able to
go over that bar, but if you're an inch underneath it, at least

(01:09:17):
you got that high. If the bar was lower, you might
not get it and it's that whole totally brains running on
overtime now. But the guy, Roger Bannister,
who did the Four Minute Mile, that you know, the whole story
about him, like, you know, he, he broke that 4 minute mile.
And within a year, a bunch of other people did it as well.
But in the whole history of recorded humanity, nobody ever

(01:09:39):
broke it. And they didn't think it was
possible. But then as soon as the human
brain discovered it was possible, other people did it.
So setting that bar for perfection, it it's like it's
it's a great thing to do. It's great to strive that high,
but don't be upset if you're notthere.
You just try and do the best that you can to get to that that

(01:09:59):
bar or whatever it is that you're gonna set.
That's where I've kind of gone in my life.
And it was like, yeah, damn, if you come a few inches within it,
like look how high you jumped, you know, that's a great, it's a
great accomplishment. Definitely don't.
Don't forget to to celebrate. Don't forget to live this life.
Yes. That's I was going to say that's

(01:10:20):
that's the most important thing is, is to Sometimes the best
thing you can do is just remember how good it feels to
just breathe and be alive. And that involves setting down
all that crap. But if you can just breathe and
be like not think about the anxieties of the future or the

(01:10:41):
the soul crushing defeats of thepast that are at this point only
dreams. It's what's right here, right
now. You're probably in a good place
if you're listening to this. I don't think you'd be listening
to this. If you're getting, you know,
chased by a bear or or a bucket slam into a Cliff in a plane,
you're probably 99% chance or more.

(01:11:03):
You're in a place where you're OK, you're doing, you're doing
well. And the biggest demons are the
thoughts about the past and the thoughts about the future.
And those are only dreams. If you can just set that down,
TuneIn, take a deep breath and just remember how good it can
feel to be alive. That's really powerful.
And I that's another thing I hadto relearn because I was very

(01:11:26):
much trapped in in my own hell of anxieties about the future
and worries and, you know, and thoughts of the past.
But yeah, just breathe and be here.
And one of the best places to toreach that contemplation is just
literally sitting in silence. And I know you've said that
you've been you know in total reclusive mode in like the

(01:11:49):
cocoon and stuff like that. And I kind of get it, like I've
wanted to be there myself. I guess, you know, now that I
actually think about it a littlebit I guess this summer I kind
of have been you know, I had a couple.
I had a couple defeats in in a few jobs and I you know I'm it
was a great lesson to learn because I am I'm I'll straight
up admit that I was kind of a pompous ass where I'm like I
don't know what it's like to lose like it just a lot of my

(01:12:12):
ventures that I've ever had in my life I've been very fortunate
that if I wanted something and Iput myself to it it shows up and
it manifests. I'm just that lucky.
But lately there has been the 2023 has been the year where
I've applied myself to somethingand it was beyond my control and
it didn't come to fruition and something significant time

(01:12:33):
investments. And I can think of a few times
in my life where that's happenedbut you know it's you, you just
got to be OK OK with it. But I also to be OK with it.
I had to sit and look at what did the loss teach me because
then I could just process it because you have to try and take
the value and everything, even it, you know something as lucky
as I've been as I haven't reallylost many people that were very

(01:12:56):
close to me. I know at some point it's
probably going to it's probably going to come like a cascade.
I hope not. But you know, even if something
is drastic as losing somebody, if that happens, you have to
sort of see after the dust settles, like what was the
purpose of their presence in ourlife.
And you know, how can I honor that by moving forward?
It's one of the worst things that I think most of us can go

(01:13:16):
through is the loss of somebody.But never mind something that
drastic, just the changes in thelike, you know, just losing
something in your life as far aslike a venture or something like
that goes like, what did the process teach me so that you can
not look at its negative value but its positive value and
impacting your life Because it was, you know, the famous meme.
You've probably seen it, where there's two people driving and a

(01:13:37):
boss, I think, and one guy's looking out over.
They're driving on like a Cliff edge going around the corner,
and one guy's looking out the window that's right along the
edge of the wall and it's all dreary.
And there's spiders on this Cliff hanging off.
And the guy's all sad and it's dark and slimy and water
dripping off it. The other guy's on the edge of
the guardrail, overlooking this gorgeous valley with the sunset,

(01:13:57):
and it's like literally looking at this bus and just if the dude
looking out that slimy, you know, window just turned his
head a little bit this way, he'slooking at the same gorgeous
scene as this guy sitting acrossthe aisle.
So it's a great metaphor for life though.
Like you can you can look at certain situations in your life
as this one thing or you can look at it as this one thing.

(01:14:18):
Which one is going to torture the shit out of you?
It's the one looking out that nasty look view out of that
window. So you can choose to if you want
to be there, but why choose that?
You know, that goes all the way up to the what ifs of all these
crazy things that we talk about,like with Brandon Thomas and
everything else. Like you can look at life that
it's this this boring thing where you know none of the

(01:14:38):
mysteries that we're talking about actually exist.
None of it does. And that just that sucks All the
other what ifs. They're all unknowns.
Unless you literally can jump ina boat and waltz on down to
Antarctica and walk right acrossthat damn continent and you can
be for sure that thing is at theSouth Pole.
There's no Dome, There's no holethat leads to an inner earth.
There's no secret base down there that John Kerry and Obama

(01:15:00):
and everybody else is going downthere to visit like and we're
going to go. Right from there to the dark
side of the moon. Yeah, exactly.
And if and if you can't prove that beyond a reasonable doubt,
the mysteries of those things, they're literally just fun.
They add to life a little bit more.
But yeah. But yeah, yeah, I I agree
wholeheartedly, 100%. You know, perspective is

(01:15:21):
everything. The ability to choose how you
react to things will change yourlife drastically.
I think happiness is not, is is not something that happens to.
It's something you choose. It's not something that happens
to you, It's something you choose.
And I realized that somewhere along the way.
Not that I remember that every day, but I think enough to keep

(01:15:44):
the car on in between the lines,or at least on the road.
Just keep it on the road. Just keep it.
Keep it out of the trees in the guardrails.
That, you know, just keep coursecorrecting when I'm in the right
state of mind and we all have bad days and shit happens.
And you know, I'm lucky also that I haven't had any

(01:16:06):
devastating losses in my life besides all my grandparents, but
no extremely untimely devastating losses and I'm very
fortunate for that. But you know, we're all here on
a journey into a space where we are forgetting ourselves.

(01:16:27):
We're all here at this point in time because you know energies
are shifting and we're actually literally starting to integrate
the higher versions of ourselves, the veils starting to
lift. And as that happens, I I believe
we start to be move more in tunewith the higher version of

(01:16:48):
ourselves like our Oversoul, whatever you want to call it,
even even by tiny increments Andthose higher versions of
ourself. I think we never lose that, you
know. So even if even if someone very
dear to you past they I, I firmly believe that they that
version of them still exists. It's it's not say it's not

(01:17:10):
tragic because the very specificfilters that are in place that
'cause that person to believe the things they believe.
I I don't know that we always hold on to that.
I think we can always access that.
But having that as the the wholly believed version of our
reality of this ride that we're on, that horrifying death grip
on this roller coaster, I think we we step away from that.

(01:17:33):
But isn't that a good thing? Because then that person's in a
place where thinking, looking like I believe what, you know
what I think. I think, I think there's there's
so much more going on than meetsthe eye.
And we are. We're starting to get to a place
where remembering that on a collective level, not just
individual awakenings, but it's like it's like popcorn, you

(01:17:55):
know, like for the past, for foralways.
There's been pops here and there.
But as time has moved on, you know, getting into like the 70s
and 80s, it started to pick up alittle bit more with and then
you had like the Seth material in the the law of one material
and our consciousness getting seated with higher stuff and
getting into you know 2012 a lotof stuff is starting to pop.

(01:18:19):
You know there's definitely a lot of action going on.
Things are drastically differentthan they were in the 90s.
There's so much more informationabout their, about their people
are able to connect. I am.
All this information is readily available at your fingertips and
it's just increasing as the energy rises, as as the

(01:18:40):
frequency it keeps rising or could say the kids stick with
the analogy as the as the the hot plate keeps getting hotter,
more of those kernels are going to pop.
And it's just going to like, at what point is it just like, you
know, I'm sure you've made popcorn at one point it's just
like, yeah, and like and then the whole place is full of

(01:19:01):
poppedcorn instead of little seeds waiting to be awakened.
And I feel like that's where we are right now.
Like it's it's happening and it even though I wanted it to
happen quicker, like looking back to 2012, I might have said
the same exact thing but we're still, I think so much further
along than we were ten years ago.
It's it's still picking up because so many more people are

(01:19:23):
are getting there. Like you were talking about
people that you never ever wouldhave thought in a million years
would be discovering things likeReiki and sound baths and and
meditation. People are becoming aware of
that. And you know, like the law of
attraction becoming straight up pop culture, which that's one

(01:19:48):
step away from realizing that you're creating your own
reality. Yeah, the experiments that
confirm all that stuff is is really what broke it through for
me because I would hear a lot ofthat stuff about law of
attraction and everything. But the more, the more
scientific experiments that comeout, there's more people that
are actually diving into it, more people that are you know
their their pH DS and they're going into that.
I mean to the point where what was it, was it 22, I think it

(01:20:10):
was 2022, there was Nobel Prize winners to reaffirm some of the
stuff with the dual solid experiment and everything.
So I mean it just just hearing the the concepts that have been
around since the 90s, I mean some of these people have been.
Talking about this stuff for decades and just with the
advancements that happened, it confirmed some of those things.
And I think for people who had avery skeptical mind or looked at

(01:20:31):
everything like woo woo, once they hear more of those
substantiated scientific experiments leading down these
woo woo roads and confirming it all, it's like, OK, well, what
more of that stuff might be trueas well?
And if our consciousness is fundamental and the world
doesn't render beyond our fingertips like a video game

(01:20:53):
does, like we are the ones who are experiencing, experiencing
everything. And it all works that way,
simulation theory or not? Like I kind of don't bite into
simulation theory, but I feel. Far too simplistic.
It's it's like it's like our version of it.
Like we understand simulation, we understand video games.
So it's a good analogy. But the the reality of it is so

(01:21:14):
much more complicated than our human brain can comprehend.
Because like me saying I'm creating my reality and I'm
rolling out the version of that person doesn't mean I'm creating
that person. It's the the reality that we
that we live in is such a vast tapestry of creation, with all
these points creating their own galaxies, their own universe.

(01:21:35):
It's like it's so far beyond what our little human brains can
comprehend from a logical standpoint.
But when we TuneIn feel into it energetically with our heart, we
know that it's true. You know it.
We've been talking about it in spiritual texts for millennia.

(01:21:55):
And yeah, like you're saying science.
Science is catching up, Science is catching up.
And at this point it's definitely beyond a shadow of a
doubt. Like science has caught up as
far as the cutting edge or even far beyond that.
But as far as like academia and and the accepted, accepted and

(01:22:18):
taught versions of air quotes. How did yeah.
Very, very many air quotes. How long before that catches
place? And that's you know the same
with with any shift like you you.
I don't I'll butcher the quotes.I don't remember who it was or
what the quote was. But it it like take someone
loosely quote of someone who I can't remember so I'll claim

(01:22:43):
that this is mine. It's.
Going to change so much. As it is by the, by the, you
know, all the information is there.
It takes about another 100 yearsfor it to actually collect, to
to pattern out into the collective.
You know, I think that we are, we're already well underway
because a lot of these things have been going on.
Experiments like the double sootexperiment have been going on

(01:23:03):
for for decades. Yeah, it's actually been about
100 years. I think that Niels Bohr and oh
boy see this is another thing effect of it being later in the
day. But their experiments into
quantum physics I want to say were in like the 19 like in
19151920 range. Like they started a lot of these

(01:23:24):
things with their basic understandings back then.
And of course you have to look at the theories of relativity.
That was like the cutting edge stuff, but theories of
relativity all dealt with the big stuff and then once they
started looking deeper and smaller that theories of
relativity started to break down.
It was a great basis just like the Newtonian physics were just

(01:23:46):
basically basis of understandingwhen it comes to the theories of
relativity and then the theoriesof relativity they led up to
what we believe in in quantum physics.
So who knows what the next levelbeyond you know the
understanding of quantum physicsis going to lead to.
So but it's it's literally been like 100 years worth of studying
and and having these philosophies but as the you know

(01:24:09):
stuff like the Hadron Collider and and some of these other more
advanced experiments go like even one with quantum
entanglement and I've had that on a list of stuff that I want
to do but I need to fully like dive into the the the study of
the quantum entanglement. But the the general summary of
it is they took the light from, I want to say a quasar that left

(01:24:29):
its home star like a it's about a billion light years away and
they split it on a prism on Earth.
And once they've split it, they still, once they managed to
split the prism, they still wereable to do the excitement
experiment of when they split the photons from that thing and
were able to still have something react.

(01:24:50):
And it was basically the star. The light left it star a billion
years ago, but they still were able to do something, to have it
react instantaneously. So they were still.
At a distance. Yep, so they were, and that's
what. That's it just blows my mind
every time I talk about that, that that was Einstein's best
description of what he was witnessing.

(01:25:11):
We call it quantum entanglement now, but the greatest mind of
the time came up with the phrasespooky action at a distance
'cause he didn't know what the hell was going on with these
small parts articles, you know. So getting into these
understandings about the universe and the way it works
is, is what will I think eventually shift more of the
skeptic's mind in my opinion. Yeah, I think, I think we are

(01:25:34):
there. And you know, taking it back to
the conspiracy stuff we're talking about at the beginning,
I think we've been there for for100 years.
We've had all kinds of technology that is impressed and
I think a lot more people are well aware of that now and that
stuff's going to start coming tothe surface very soon.
I think there's you can only maybe this whole maybe project

(01:25:54):
Project Bluebeam it's the is thestart for us actually seeing
some of these technologies that have been suppressed so long.
You know get all just air out all all the shit like all right,
we all know you fucked with us for a long time.
I'm willing to not not be OK with it, but move on.

(01:26:16):
Like let's let's move on as as acollective and remember how to
come together and stop trying tocontrol everything and
manipulate everything. And remember that we are so much
more than that. Our consciousness is so powerful
and we can, if we can just come together and be in a state of a
little bit more of energetic alignment, that this world will

(01:26:39):
be such an amazing place to be. And I think we're we're headed
that way. I know we're headed that way.
And it's again, like I want it, I want it to be now, not even
five years, never mind 500 years.
And we'll see. We'll see how long it takes.
But the ride is pretty exciting.You know like I've I've seen so
much change and and I have had so much corroboration of all

(01:27:01):
corroboration of all these things that I had downloaded
over the years and all these things that I've been talking
about for years that like it's like yeah, I mean I can no
longer with a shadow of a with ashadow of a dope.
I think that all that was my imagination because so much has
come to pass this time of shifting that we're in now

(01:27:22):
people waking up. It's like we're we're in the
thick of it. It's not even like 20/20/12 was
like yeah everything feels like it's shifting sure.
But every on the surface like everything is the same.
You know it's society is still running the same but now you
know after COVID, the world shutting down nothing will be
the same. It's just not the same as it

(01:27:43):
was. You know, people are shifting
jobs, people are shifting where they live, people are making
massive shifts that they weren'tprepared to make eleven years
ago. And that's just because you
know, we're we're still upcycling.
I feel like 2012 was like a a a sort of like birthing of
innocence. Like I feel like it was, it was

(01:28:05):
a turning point for a lot of people.
You know, I went through a sort of a major shift that time as
well. But I feel like that was a
turning point for a decent amount of people to almost like
wake them up like it was, it waslike a like like waking them
from the dream essentially. Like I feel like that was a big
part of it. I mean our big transition in
2012, I just believe it or not, there were actually people
within government of like FEMA and and different places who had

(01:28:28):
no idea what was going to happenin 2012.
And a lot of them obviously beenstudying it for a very long
time. And there was enough of it out
there to where I had gone to regional meetings out in Boston
when I was, like, really deep into Emergency Management and a
whole bunch of other stuff with some pretty higher up people and
talking with some of these guys,they were like, yeah, yeah, we
totally think something's going to happen in December 2012.

(01:28:48):
We just don't know what. So we're just all kind of just
getting ready that something might hit the fan.
Are we, are we going to have a pole shift?
Are we going to have, like Yellowstone volcano go off?
Like, we have no idea what's going to go on, but we're all
just pretty much of the agreement that something's going
to happen. Of course, nothing did, but.
But I think it did. I'm sorry.
Like that. That catastrophic.
Well, I I think, I think we had I, and this is a personal belief

(01:29:12):
ticket with a grain of salt. I think we had there were
buffers in place to help us so that so that we didn't 'cause we
weren't ready. You know as a as a collective we
would have if we flipped the switch and went through
basically what we went through in in 2020 on if that just
happened instantaneously withoutthe gradual build up of that

(01:29:33):
decade or eight years in between, I feel like we would
have torn ourselves apart. But I've torn ourselves apart
because we collectively, even though individually some of us
might have thought we were prepared for it, who knows in in
in reality because we didn't have to, but I don't think we
were prepared. And I think they were buffers in
place and those helped us to integrate these shifting

(01:29:58):
energies to a point where we were able to upcycle enough.
And then at some point in the past five years, I think those
were completely removed. So now we're actually in it for
real, whereas in 2012, we had a little bit of external help as
in some buffers. And that's something that I had

(01:30:20):
a strong feeling of. And I know there was other
people out there that had information about things like
that actually in our Galaxy, massive, massive orbs that were
that were helping with that, youknow, whatever.
Like I said, take it with a grain of salt, but that's my
belief. And I feel like now we are,
we're in it, we're we're, we're hitting it raw, yeah.

(01:30:42):
I mean, what a kind of exciting time to be alive.
Though like I I have. I don't want to say I'm not
intuitive because I'm trying to get away from like any of that
self defeating talk. Like I just historically have
never been a very intuitive person.
But the limited amount of intuition that I have I feel
like I have right now tells me that we are in the midst of some
sort of a a massive shift that is going to happen with

(01:31:03):
humanity. Like I feel like all of us are
here at this time. I just hope that that shift is
not a is not the massive reset that I feel like has happened on
this planet several times. Like, I I've done enough
studying. I'm smart enough to where I've
rubbed double S with enough people and listened to enough
talks and and seen the evidence myself of how it does appear
that we've had a way advanced civilization beyond people in

(01:31:26):
caves 13,000 years ago. You know, we Oh yeah, there's
architecture. There is so much stuff that's
coming to light that mainstream academia tried their damnedest
to keep the wraps on, but they haven't been able to with
information and people just don't care anymore.
They're just whistleblowers everywhere.
There's just so much informationthat comes out that has come out
that has proven to me beyond a reasonable doubt that our

(01:31:49):
history is nowhere near what we thought it was.
You know, the Sphinx is way older than we thought it was.
That's been 150% proven. It just the the architecture in
in pure mastery of some ancient buildings that they they still
cannot to this day explain how they cut precision and moved
things that heavy. We still can't do it with what

(01:32:11):
we have today. So explain that shit like you
can't. Yeah.
And the fact that the most advanced stuff is from the from
the furthest timeline back, the most advanced amazing structures
that are still standing, the largest, most massive stones are
from the earliest history. And you know, that's I I have my

(01:32:32):
own beliefs about that and I've had lots of downloads about
that. That would be another whole
episode, but. That'll be the next one.
It'll be part 5. But yeah, I I believe that we
were, we were, you know, definitely part of a much more
advanced civilization at that time.
I mean, I think we did touch on this when we were talking about
galactic cycles. I know we touched on this like

(01:32:54):
we were at a place but I also think that we came here from
from an we you know we came herefrom another place to to to see
and to keep Continue working on the lessons that we get from
being at this level of density of of reality Of being able to
step in totally forget our our greater selves our higher selves

(01:33:16):
our connection to our oversoul and step in blind and basically
run all these experiments like what's going to happen if we
pull put a whole bunch of peoplein here in whatever scenario
with a whole bunch of NPCS goingdown Brandon's road.
Yeah. A whole bunch of NPCS and a

(01:33:36):
bunch of Lizard Turks that are they're going to direct them and
try to make them do all this stuff to to harvest negative
energy. What will happen in in 200 years
sitting with that or or 12,000 years or whatever.
You know. Yeah.
I mean who knows. But I have, I have my beliefs
and I've, I've had memories of different things, of ancient

(01:33:59):
civilizations, of different civilizations on different
planets. And there's so much more to our
history far beyond this planet than meets the eye.
And I think that we're starting to awaken to that.

(01:34:20):
And I feel like Project Bluebeammight be like I look over here.
Distraction. Hey look at the silly monkey.
Look at these aliens rather thanwaking up to the fact that we're
part of a massive galactic civilization that goes back
billions of years, part of an overall collective of of cosmic

(01:34:42):
cousins to use Corey goods. Terms of civilizations that have
been cross pollinating and moving through sections of the
the Galaxy or or the universe. I don't even know if how far it
goes. I mean the universe is pretty
large if it's infinite that's that's not even comprehendible

(01:35:03):
but there's you know how many playgrounds are there and are
they is it like we're still trying to understand it from the
perspective of almost being likea a video game like a simulation
kind of respective and I think that's the closest analogy that
we're going to get at the moment.
At least me. I'm not like a super, super

(01:35:24):
scientific person, although I I love it.
I like I I did take Nissim Harriman's course when it first
took out about the the unified science and it was which was
amazing. I highly recommend.
I think it's actually free now like as of several years ago.
So that's up there free. I was on the very first version
that was the paid version where we got to like sit in a call

(01:35:44):
with Nissim every week and that guy to me it's fascinating.
He is brilliant. He's he's brilliant.
He just released something. I haven't even watched it yet,
but there was a video where they're actually, it seems like
they're taking another step. And that's like talking about
the applied sciences of all thishigher consciousness, higher
dimensional technology that's going to start seeing the light

(01:36:06):
of day. I think that may be one of the
first steps. But you know, that's what I'm
choosing to believe. Sometimes I have, the world is
so convoluted. Sometimes it feels like I don't
know. I don't know what to believe
anymore and I'm OK with that. Like I I I don't latch on and
need anything to be one way. I'm willing to work with a lot

(01:36:27):
of different things and see whatcomes up out of that and still
being able to. I've I've come to the place
where I'm quite fine working with belief systems that are
totally contradictory. Because you know, if it comes
down to it and it's all arising out of consciousness, then why
can't we have contradictory things in creation if we can
have contradictory thoughts? Yeah, it's true.
Like, I mean if you think of thefact that there's a lot of

(01:36:50):
evidence that shows that consciousness is fundamental and
obviously the dual slit experiments and all those kind
of things proved it to a certainextent.
Like it definitely is the way that the particles move in this
universe is dependent on the observer, A conscious observer.
So if life, if, if things are emergent from our consciousness,
that's a fascinating concept. Like you, you know, granted it's

(01:37:13):
it's hard for anybody to conceive.
And when they hear me describe this, I got into debates with
people in in this, this thing that I'm about to describe.
And they're just kind of like, yeah, but that doesn't make any
sense, 'cause I'm here. So let's paint the picture that
in a dream, like just say tonight I go to sleep and I have
a dream about us having a conversation on this podcast
right now, I'm sitting in the same spot.
You're up on my screen. All this stuff's going on.

(01:37:36):
You and I have a fascinating conversation.
You, the one I'm talking to right now, you have no
recollection of it because I literally made the entire
environment the conversation we're having and you, Ben
Carroll, were all figments of myimagination.
So if you take the micro and themacro and you literally paint
our consciousness as a higher form up above this who is

(01:37:57):
literally having a form of a dream, you have no idea if
that's actually happening. And it's been proven when
they've studied people's brain waves and dreams that a dream
that could seem to you to last like the course of an hour,
right. It's it can happen in is as
short as like maybe 2 to 3 minutes in actual time frames

(01:38:18):
measured outside of your dream state.
Your dream state shows that yourbrain was active in some sort of
weird way for a couple minutes. But when you come out and be
like, hey, what were you dreaming about And they've done
these studies. It was this long drawn out
dream. So these people have these long
drawn out dreams. Well, what if our higher state
of consciousness can literally dream 75100 years worth of a
lifetime that you and I are perceiving right now in the

(01:38:40):
blink of whatever, you know, cosmic blink of their cosmic
eye, of whatever they're living through in a different state of
consciousness. Like I've heard all of these.
There's nothing I'm making up. But this is something that I've
heard of that bakes your noodle and just makes you think like,
Oh my God. So if the world I'm living in
right now is running experimentsto show that everything around

(01:39:01):
me is dependent on a conscious observer, am I literally here,
you know, we have these these concepts of manifestation and
laws of attraction. Is that all true?
Because I am literally creating every bit of the reality that is
here. You know, like it.
Just the way that the Symphony of life blends from one thing to
the next sometimes is a little bit creepy.

(01:39:23):
And I don't know about this has happened to you lately.
I've gone from the 111 and the 222, like all those things that
came up on the clock. You know, it's been happening
for a few years. Once you become aware of of a
lot of the Angel numbers and youhear people talk about
philosophies like that, you'll start to see those numbers on
the clock and then eventually you'll see them so much you're
like, what does it mean? Why am I seeing these numbers

(01:39:46):
all the time, right. And then it's gone so far from
me all the way up to you know, Ihave a lucky number that pops up
for me all over the place. I see it all the time.
Well, it's shifted from the numbers first to that lucky
number. Then it LED into like songs like
I'd be thinking of something andthe song would come on in that
references what I'm literally thinking about to right now at

(01:40:09):
this current point over the lastfew months, I will literally
have either something being saidby someone in the room in a
conversation or something, and my eyes will literally land on
the word they're saying. At the moment they're saying it
just randomly. That has started to happen and
I've heard different philosophical talks about that
that like that is the the synchronicities are deviation

(01:40:31):
syncs, like we we quantify our existence of of thinking about
everything. I'm talking about about
consciousness being an emergent and everything.
We we talked about it in the terms of a simulation because
that's just the way that our brains will quantify what's
really happening here, 'cause it's just way too complex.
But we know how a simulation works.

(01:40:52):
A computer runs it, a programmermakes it, and a little character
runs through a simulation, doesn't really realize it's
there. Or maybe it does, but it's so
real. Sometimes you get lost and you
put on AVR headset and sometimesyou don't even run into a wall,
'cause you don't realize you're there.
So, you know, if you think aboutit, like all of those concepts
and all of that wrapped up into this package of like, what is
our existence really, and where does it begin and where does it

(01:41:15):
end? And are we really creating all
of this in our own sort of way? And if we are, oh, let's talk
about deviation syncs. So, like, the more we break away
from a program, we stop caring about our nine to find jobs.
We can't stop caring about the, you know, the the career path
that somebody else says we should be on.
And we break away from the humdrum program that we're used

(01:41:38):
to being into every single day. That's when some of those
synchronizations happen. Because that's really highly
abnormal that you would look at a clock and it would be on that
exact time or that your favoritenumber would pop up.
Or that is someone saying a word, your eye gets fixated on
it on a billboard as you're driving by it or something.
And the person in the car says the word happy.
And there it is on the Billboardright when they said the word.

(01:42:00):
That's really atypical and it's really abnormal.
But the more you break away fromthe program, you are becoming
the abnormality. So therefore you are attracting
more abnormalities. And that's like, I guess like
the universe's way of kind of like showing you keep doing what
you're doing. And then when they become more
profound, it's almost like you're becoming more of a a

(01:42:22):
magnet for those and you're maybe manifesting things closer
to the moment, like you're actually getting better at
attracting those things like keep keep on the road that
you're on is basically what the road sign saying when you hit
that point. So I've heard that and I'm like,
OK, I'm it's worth a shot. You know, like let's let's stay
on the road, it's we're within those lanes, but don't hit the

(01:42:42):
guardrail. Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, I've I've had, I've had just as many amazing
synchronistic experiences, numbers, the same exact thing
you're talking about with reading a word at the same time
someone says that I've had, I'veexperienced that more than a
couple times and it's far and also something that happened to

(01:43:04):
me. This was around 2014 when I was
when I was having crazy energy experiences.
I think it was started happeningbefore I had the really, really
crazy experience. But I would, I would randomly
think of something. It'll be something small, not
like, not like anything crazy, but one time I just, I remember
like just thinking and it's justit's not like I'm focusing on it

(01:43:27):
and like that. But like my mom's looking for
her mittens. So so we can leave and I go
downstairs and my mom was looking for mittens so we can
leave, which is like totally random.
It's not like something happens all the time, but so many little
things like that. Like I I I don't remember
specifically because they were so like day-to-day normal
things. But I would think about the
exact same thing that would happen very close to immediately

(01:43:51):
after, within a couple minutes. And that I went to recycle of
that happening a lot for a period of a couple weeks and it
was, it was crazy. But numbers, the number thing,
yeah, and that's still crazy. And it always happens when I'm
driving to my to my sound healing journey work events.
I always don't just see like some repeating numbers I see.

(01:44:13):
I remember one time, and this was when I was still in Maine
because I haven't been doing a lot of in person events.
I remember one time I saw a series of license plate.
I think there was like four in arow where it was like it was 2
to 4 digits of like to 222-3333,444-445-5555.
And it was like it was like 4 freaking cars in a row.

(01:44:34):
And it's like that is amazing. But I've also experienced this
so much that I'm just like, thank you and like, yeah, you're
like, yeah, thanks. I'm on the.
I'm on the right Rd. Thanks.
Thanks for letting me know. Yeah, I actually had that happen
the other day. And.
As you're saying that I'm gonna,I I don't think you're gonna be
able to see this. So I'm gonna hang.
I'm gonna put this up to my camera real quick.

(01:44:54):
But I'm gonna see if I can. Can you oh, there.
OK, look at the the mileage and then the mileage on the trip
right above it and then the time.
And the time. So the mileage was 3333, the
trip mileage was 40, four 4.9 and then the time was 555.
I just happened to look down at the thing at that time and
something like try not to crash the car.

(01:45:17):
I'm like I have to get a pictureof this is the crazy
synchronicity. So.
I've I've had some of those too with synchronicity, so let me
pull them up really quick. My Instagram stories.
But like, that was just the coolone with getting gas.
It just stops there. If you can read that, yeah.
4444. Yeah.
And 1111, yeah, the gas stoppingthere.

(01:45:37):
That's crazy. So you're.
And I have. I had other ones come coming up
with. Look at this one if you can.
If you can see them all, cuz they're really small.
No, it's kind of blurry. All right.
Well, I have, I guess if you're listening anyways, you want to
hear it. The time is 444, battery
percentage is 44. I have 444 people that I am
following. I have 14.4000 followers and I

(01:46:00):
have 1044 posts. It's in my stories on Instagram.
That was like, that's that was crazy.
But yeah, but yeah for for a little while I was having ones
in fours like that with the gas and and until it got really
strong like those those ones that are in my stories 'cause
that was, that's crazy When it'slike 12345 things, that's

(01:46:26):
that's. Just remember being at the point
where I was like, what does it mean?
And I've had somebody who was, you know, very deep into
spirituality basically say like it means whatever you want it to
mean. That's actually, you know, to go
back real quick. And we got to wrap up soon,
'cause we're almost on the two hour mark, but we're not done
talking. So whatever.
Whenever it ends, it ends. I had a friend who you know was
basically like that. It's gonna mean whatever you

(01:46:47):
want it to mean. And then when I recently have
sat in moments of clarity and that's another thing I wanted to
ask you about, you know, we we sit in these moments where we we
like the clues from people or wemeditate and we get those
moments of clarity and you know,people channeling or whatever
else. I think those moments of
clarity, where you are sitting in sounds, whether you're

(01:47:08):
meditating, you're listening to a sound journey or whatever.
If you speak out in some of those moments or even sit in
your car in silence and you you're going through a thing in
your life. If you just talk out loud and
almost just wait for that silentresponse to come, you know, you
just say something out loud. And if an internal voice,
whatever it is, says something back, like continue that

(01:47:29):
conversation. And I basically have said that
before, like, what does it mean?And I got that same response.
I had someone I trust very much spiritually tell me it means
whatever you want it to me. So stop asking some external
source for what those number synchronicities mean.
So I had that same reaction. I basically had that same
response. When I've said, like I saw
something, I'm like, what does it mean?

(01:47:49):
And it was like, what do you want it to me?
What are you thinking about right now and what do you want
it to mean, to remind you of something significant?
Like it's going to mean what youwant it to mean.
So stop trying to figure out, like, why am I seeing these
synchronicities? What is it?
What is this all about? Like, sit in the silence and see
if you can feel what it's all about.
Because nothing, no one's going to pop out of the glove
compartment and be like, it's about this.

(01:48:10):
Like, it's about stop being an asshole to your kids because
you're not breaking the generational curses of the stuff
that you carried into this life.And you need to teach them
better so they don't do this to their kids.
You know there's not going to bea profound answer like that, but
maybe that profound answer is going to come from sitting in
those moments of silence. Yeah.
And so hearing you say all thesethings and something you
mentioned maybe 1/2 hour ago, talking about not having a

(01:48:34):
strong intuition, you're doing fine, you got a You got a hell
of an intuition. Are you listening?
That's the key. Very.
Yeah, Are you listening? Starting to see the numbers is
the first step, asking questionsand receiving answers.
I alluded to that just briefly at the very beginning of this,

(01:48:56):
about when I was a teenager, howI started having these downloads
where it was like a conversation.
I was asking questions and getting answers and getting a
lot of information, a lot of teachings, which at the time I
didn't tell anybody about because I've never heard
anything about it. Channelling was so far not on
the radar. Like I just took it and I look
for a lot of corroboration over the years.
I spent a lot of time scouring the metaphysical section of the

(01:49:20):
bookstore because AOL was the onwas all there was for the
Internet and there wasn't true. Yeah, there was nothing on
there. And then, you know, come coming
back to my reawakening. A big part of my practice and I
have a lot of blog posts like this.
I don't take nearly as much timeto do it as I used to because

(01:49:41):
I'm focused on different things.I'm focused on definitely less
words and more holding vibrational resonance.
It's just where I'm at. Nothing wrong with either way.
But for a while I was asking questions out loud and writing
down the answers and even writing down the questions.
And there's a lot of my blog posts from 2017 and 2018 on my

(01:50:02):
on my blog website inner self sustained that are that and I
would I would scribble like so fast and I didn't allow myself
to think about it because what you're probably doing is like
getting an answer and like what does that mean Is that true?
Rather than I highly suggest what you do is ask the question,

(01:50:24):
notate what comes through without judgement.
Scribble it down, type it out, speak to text, whatever you got
to do to get it down without worrying about if it makes any
sense. Read it back and I've had my
mind blown. Like, there's some blog posts on
my website which are pretty advanced information that are
far beyond where I'm at myself right now.

(01:50:45):
Like about the nature of realityand the holographic universe and
vibration and resonance and questions I used to ask and get
answers to. I can't say it's 100% true
because who The Who the hell knows?
But the answers were way more intense and way more eloquent
than just some random scribbles.By not thinking about it and

(01:51:07):
just allowing it to flow, I was receiving my my own answers.
I I don't feel like I was channeling.
I don't feel like I was channeling other beings.
I don't think I I do that. I I work with some energies,
which is a story for another dayof other beings.
But as far as information goes, I'm very connected to my own
Higher Self. I stepped into this place to do

(01:51:27):
this work and I came in and I had a walk in experience with my
Higher Self when I was 17 years old, which is that blog post I
mentioned at the beginning of the podcast that I released in
the fall. Very intense, very intense world
shattering. My first Dark Night of the Soul
experience happened in August oftwo no of 1994, not 2004, 1994.

(01:51:49):
Very intense experience. That's when I started getting
the the downloads of informationas conversations in my head.
I wrote a really long blog post about it was a very lonely time
in my life because I couldn't find any corroborating
information on Go to the metaphysical section of the
bookstore and try to find corroboration.
And I I look for corroboration for years.
Eventually I decided I just drive myself crazy and figure

(01:52:12):
out what I was going to do with my life and fucking do it
because I was driving myself crazy with all this stuff.
So I was like, all right, I'm going to give music a go.
Within a year I was a rock star.And then ten years later, I
lived that life for 10 years drinking alcohol, which shuts
down your intuition for me anyways.

(01:52:33):
And then stop touring, Stop drinking, because drinking was
only for me, ever, a means of being able to handle the energy
of people. Because I always been highly,
highly empathetic, just taking on other people's energy.
In high school, I had to sit. I used to a lot of times go and
eat my lunch in the library, sneak crackers out of my pocket

(01:52:54):
and eat crackers in the library for my lunch because I just
couldn't handle being in that space with all that energy.
In retrospect, that's what I think.
Not that I didn't have friends, I just couldn't take it like
that energy bouncing around and but yeah, so I I lost my train
of I had AI had an amazing point.

(01:53:16):
What was I just saying? What was I talking about?
This is what I was talking. About tuning in your intuition.
Oh, tuning in your intuition. Yeah, so I was going off on
attention anyways, that's why I lost my train of thought.
Tuning in your intuition. If you are not paying attention
and not willing to not judge, then you are not.
You're not. Your intuition is right there

(01:53:38):
telling you something. You're just like you're
basically, you know, someone says something like prove it.
Let me look it up on Google. I don't trust you.
Whereas if you just allow it to come through 1st, you'll be at
least. Personally, I was amazed at the
there's dozens of in In 2018 is when I was very prolific,

(01:54:01):
prolific with blog posts. I was posting multiple blog
posts every month. These days I'm lucky if I get
out of half a dozen in a year because I just don't do words.
I'm not called to as much, but it's right there.
You just have to just have to work with it.
And I I these days I've been doing a lot of coaching for
intuitive sound healing and a part of what I'm after, you

(01:54:24):
know, a decade plus of working on this.
I've just, I've been taught practices and I've been teaching
these practices and one of them is a practice for awakening your
intuition and utilizing sound ina way where you're just totally
tuned into a sound. Whether it's, you know, like a
tuning fork is what I always use.
So just like taking that tuning fork, tuning into the tuning

(01:54:46):
fork, allowing everything else that's just a way.
Sound is a really powerful way of shutting down the brain,
which a lot of people have probably experienced with sound
baths and whatnot. But utilizing it on yourself
with something as simple as a tuning fork or as a a single
singing bowl, tuning into that and then allowing yourself just
to let things come up or start asking questions gets from that

(01:55:08):
space of shifting your brain wave state and amazing things
can start to happen. But yeah, I have AI have a
practice that I work on with people that's that's number one
First first minutes of my coaching sessions is dive right
into that practice because that is the birth of all of not only

(01:55:33):
my blog posts but my work with sound.
It was all it's I I I call what I do intuitive sound healing
because it's it's working with intuition, allowing the sound to
happen and that that's that's what I do.
I don't sit down beyond some basic structures that I have to

(01:55:53):
do when I'm doing an online event because I have to plan out
specific sounds I want for different scenes, so to say
throughout the event. It's all just allowing myself to
step out of the way and allow what comes out to come out in.
The first step is just listeningfor melody in my head and
singing it back. And from there it's almost like
complete channelling when I'm really in the zone.

(01:56:14):
It's just happening, just flowing.
And it is like channelling. But like I said, I don't.
I don't feel like I'm channelling anybody else except
for myself, my higher self. But intuition is so powerful in
such an intrinsic part of who weare as human beings.
Every single one of us has a massive connection to intuition.
Why did we not get on the highway when there was a big

(01:56:35):
accident? You know, whether whether or not
you're intentionally listening to it or not, it is always
there. Start showing up as numbers and
then it starts showing up as words.
And then if you start listening and asking questions, that's the
key. You start asking questions,
you're going to start getting some answers that might freak
you the fuck out, or at least like excite you.
Like I didn't get freaked out. I was like, this is awesome.

(01:56:58):
And yeah, but it's I'm not special.
We all have that. And part of this time, this
period of awakening, with the veil thinning and the the
frequency of this planet and ourconsciousness expanding, we have
a much greater level of connection to that.
And that's only going to increase.
That's why all of a sudden, so, like, back in 2011, I discovered

(01:57:22):
the secret, right. And then that I discovered
Esther Hicks like, oh, this is cool.
Someone's like channelling. I never heard of channelling
like nothing else out there about it.
And I used to live in the metaphysical section of the
bookstore, like I told you in the 90s.
So it was, it was 10 years, 20 years.
But I guess that was 10 years before.
And I never found, I never ever,ever bumped into any channeled

(01:57:46):
material. And there was a little out
there. There was like the law of one.
There was a Seth material and there was some other stuff, but
I never found it. I discover Esther Hicks, like
within. Within days I discovered Bashar.
And then boom, there's all thesepeople channeling.
And that was like within like a couple couple.
No, We'll call it a year from from like 2011 when I discovered

(01:58:08):
the secret to discovering EstherHicks, which was probably a
couple months later. So I've I found out she had been
actually cut out of it. So I went and watched the
original like someone was cut out.
I got to watch and see why. Why did they cut her out?
And then then. Discovered.
I didn't know that. Yeah, she was in the original
secret. And then from that I discovered
her. And from her I discovered
Bashar. And from Bashar it was just like

(01:58:30):
floodgates. And then all of a sudden
everybody's channelling on all these social media channels,
there's millions of people channelling.
Yeah. Is that because we're being
activated or is that because I activated it in my personal
little sliver of the universe that's happening through my my
own little double slit experiment?
Right. Seriously though, you wonder.

(01:58:52):
All that stuff I I gotta tell you when you were you were
talking a few minutes ago about how you know the the sound can
sort of put your brain in certain states.
I still go back to that breath work session up in Maine when we
went up there. And you know for those of you
that didn't hear that episode, Iwent up to Maine to go see Ben
and Janine. Me and my wife did and Ben was
doing an event. I think it was on a Friday

(01:59:13):
night. We spent the weekend up there,
and on a Friday night, Ben was doing a sound healing event at
a, I mean, we'll call that. It's like a Wellness Center kind
of place. Yeah, like a Wellness Center.
Yep. And there was, it was a sound
healing event in the midst of a breath work session.
So, like, they did the breath work first and then Ben did his

(01:59:34):
stuff right afterwards. If you've never done a
holotropic breath work it, it's it's crazy.
Like I've never. Loved it.
I've never done psychedelics, and that's the closest thing
that I can think of to just literally my mind was just
bugging out, like I was seeing shapes and whatever.
And then Ben started a sound healing right after the
Breathwork session happened, andmy wife had such an intense

(01:59:56):
experience, like she actually had to leave the session and one
of the facilitators had to take her out just because she started
having just a whole body reaction.
I did too, but once I got done, I was literally like trying to
hold in belly laughs. I'm just laying on my back
laughing because I had no idea what the hell I'd just gone
through. And then Ben gets into the sound
healing stuff, which hopefully all you guys who are listening

(02:00:16):
will put some of the stuff in the show notes about how you can
see Ben's events. Because if you're you know,
Ben's not doing a whole lot of in person stuff.
And even when he does, it's obviously gonna be sort of
regional. But if you can do a sound
healing event where you put on some big chunky headphones like
I have right now, or even my my sound set up in my den that I
have right now. Whenever you do an event, I've
got a pretty awesome set up withsome really high frequency

(02:00:38):
speakers, some low frequency ones, and it does a it does a
great job. So me and my wife can like lay
on the middle of the floor in the mid of this nice
triangulated sound area and it'sgreat, but sometimes I'll just
put on the headphones. Oh my God.
If you guys can do that and havethat experience of just those
pure tones, there's nothing likeit.
And on top of that, me and my conspiracy mind, the way that

(02:01:01):
they do different compressions and stuff like that on YouTube.
If you go and listen to a sound healing thing, if you listen to
Hemi Sync or binaural beats on on like a YouTube or even
anything that they put out therefor sale, you have the chance of
it being manipulated. I'll tell you right now, Ben
Carroll is not sitting in his studio manipulating the sound
waves that are coming through. Like the stuff that I got to see

(02:01:23):
in person, in the in the different types of reactions
I've had during the sound healing events are just
unparalleled. So that that's my plug for you,
my friend, 'cause that those arewhat I'll turn to as a trusted
source of of something to put on, 'cause I'm very sensory
oriented. I just if I've got my eyes
closed and I'm meditating and somebody walks by the window and

(02:01:47):
I see a shadow go by, I will be in a deep.
But if I if I see that through my eyelids, I will come right
out of it, no matter how deep meditation I'm in.
So when I have your stuff on, it's probably one of the only
times that I'm able to just get really deep down into a
meditation. And it's it's, it's definitely
an experience that if you guys haven't done it, do it.
Give it at least a shot or two. And sometimes Ben does some free

(02:02:08):
events, which is a great way to segue into whatever you might
have coming up sometime soon. I'm not sure.
I think you just did one this past weekend, didn't you?
I well these days online events I do 2 per month.
OK. Yeah, that's right.
So. I always have one coming up.
That's right, yeah. But yeah, I this, the sound work
is is really, really potent. And you know, that's at least at

(02:02:31):
this point in time, who knows, who knows what this amazing
future is going to hold as as wekeep cycling up.
But at least this point in time,This is why I'm here.
I was called to step in and do this work to help people with
integrating these higher frequencies.
And it's not me like doing it for you.
It's it's me facilitating a way for the the sound I I like.
I feel like helps us to shift our state of consciousness where

(02:02:54):
we are able to do these things for ourselves.
But when we come together and doit with a group pretty I pretty
much exclusively work with groups online or in person.
That energy of people focusing on things together and I always
work with an intention definitely massively empathize
it like that goes back to my work pre sound like when I was

(02:03:15):
talking about working on intentionally shifting
timelines, working in groups with groups of people facing a
similar direction. Which is why I always work with
tensions. That's the secret to shifting
timelines that in in altered states of consciousness quote UN
quote altered. Because we're we, we've been
deemed it's it's necessary to live within this very narrow

(02:03:37):
narrow parameter of where we're functionable functionally able
to go and work in someone else'sfactory like that.
That's the acceptable place you can be from here to here.
Anything else. Anything else you're you're
fucking crazy and we're going tohave to lock you up.
Yeah. But when we when we learn to
access different states of consciousness and do so in

(02:03:57):
groups, it's extremely powerful.And I'm not talking about
psychedelics because I I personally don't do them.
I don't need them. I do not knock them whatsoever
in any way because I think they can be an extremely powerful
tool for alter states of consciousness also for trauma

(02:04:18):
release, PTSD release and all that stuff.
So I am all for them. I personally just feel like I
don't need them. I I can go so deep and I've had
so many amazing experiences withsound, with holotropic breath
work, with just being the weird way I interface interface in
this reality and all the energetic experiences that I've
had. Like I I don't need psychedelic

(02:04:39):
drugs because I'm I can already usually get there and if it's if
I'm not supposed to be there, I'm not going to be there.
And I think for me, taking psychedelics would be like
trying to trying to force the door a little bit.
I don't, I don't need to do that.
I need to be processing. So that's where I'm at
personally, but I don't knock them.
I don't know why I had to go offon that tension because because
I'm all for it if that's what you're called to do.

(02:05:00):
I think they're extremely beneficial and it's about time
that they're actually starting to get decriminalized with with
all the stuff maps and and they're actually legal I believe
now in Oregon. And that's that's how it started
with marijuana. You know, all the one and then
everybody, every place else is like, oh, they're making money
on that and that's what it comesdown to.
Yeah, unfortunately. But like the stuff that I've

(02:05:23):
that's the start. Heard it is.
It's a great start. It's better than where we've
been, you know, It's better thanputting people in jail who are
just trying to get themselves. That's the most ridiculous thing
to go to jail for marijuana psychedelics.
I mean and that goes back to thesystems control of of our state
of consciousness, way too many rebels to go down there.
But I believe that we have been intentionally manipulated more

(02:05:45):
so than just through societal program, but through specific
forms of resonance. And I'm not just talking about
4:30 to 4:40. I'm talking about technology
that holds us in lower resonanceStates and they're trying to
keep us down unaffected from thehigher frequencies that are
coming in. It's not going to work and it's
not working. But I believe that's been going

(02:06:05):
on for quite some time in so many different ways, from
physical technology all the way down to to television
programming and all that stuff. It's it's and I I sound all dark
like I'm getting militant psychological warfare.
But at the same time, it's true.I it's true.
And at the same time, I'm not, I'm not like, I'm not connected

(02:06:26):
to it and like fighting against it.
I'm just living my life and opening up and moving around it,
yeah. Exactly.
Besides, you're able to sidestepit, Like you can be aware of the
battle, but you don't actually have to ride in with the sword
and start swinging. Like you can kind of go around
the battleground and let everybody else do it.
And you can still get the same place you can get around the
entire battle. 2012, One of my first blog posts on my website

(02:06:48):
was about waking up and realizing that we're in a world
where any type of resolute res by revolution.
I'm I'm losing my ability to speak slowly.
Any type of revolution that we have in this period of time it
turns violent is not going to work because we're at a point
where there's such high levels of military, military technology
that will be instantly crushed and is totally ineffective.

(02:07:11):
The only way that we can have aneffective revolution at this
point in time is by shifting ourstate of consciousness.
And that is my first blog post Ibelieve on Inner Self Sustained
from from like October of 2012. But how relevant Now you know,
how relevant is that statement now?
Because so many people are like,we got to revolve, we got to do

(02:07:33):
something. We got to push back against the
the powers that be, that's what.I am doing that's, that's what I
see myself as doing, is I'm helping to facilitate the
revolution. There's so many people that are
doing that in so many ways, yourself included with this
podcast, talking about these ideas, getting people to listen
to them, to resonate with them, to feel like they're not alone
and therefore open themselves upto this so that they're actually

(02:07:53):
growing that resonance that is the revolution that will change
the world and it is well underway.
We're a decade plus and and things are shifting and we are
winning. And that's why we're at a point
right now where they're like, I don't know what the fuck to do,
Let's let's give them aliens. Aliens.
That's the last, this last ditcheffort it is, I mean.

(02:08:14):
What's higher than that? There's really nothing much
higher than that. But your your influence, I gotta
say, you know, I've, I've told you several different times, but
your influence from the very beginnings where you mentioned
it earlier, probably an hour ago, 'cause we're at hour number
two, I think this is hands down the longest episode.
So congratulations for that one.The the the point in your life

(02:08:37):
where you ended up going down a certain road and you know, you
talked about, I don't care who, who judges it or whatever, but
it took you some time to get there.
I remember being one of those people where I'm like, what is
Ben Carroll doing now? Like, you'd posted some stuff
and it was like way out there, different than you've ever done.
But it's not like I thumbed downmy nose on it.

(02:08:57):
It was just kind of like, what is he talking about?
Like, wow, this stuff is pretty far out there.
And then you look at it and you're like, this is some
fascinating shit and you did it around 2014, which is funny
because I it. Was actually 20.
Sorry. It was actually 2012 because the
funny story is I started Inner Self Sustained, which was my
blog and a Facebook page called Inner Self Sustained where I
started sharing all these words.I started it in October of 2012,

(02:09:20):
unbeknownst to me at the time, on the same exact day that Roz
first album was released, exactly 10 years later.
Oh. Just just a weird synchronicity.
Talking about synchronicity, that's a crazy synchronicity.
One year, exactly one year laterfrom from the day that Roz 1st
and biggest album was released, which was a major life changing

(02:09:42):
thing for me. You know, going from going from
sleeping on a a a couch with roaches crawling on me to to
living in a tour bus and and living the dream.
And then exactly 10 years later to the day is the day I start
that website. Just completely unplanned
though. Unplanned.
Didn't even realize it till manyyears later when Facebook
memories were like, oh, here's memory from one came oh, here's

(02:10:05):
another memory. Inner self esteem.
Oh, shit, that was. A crazy.
That's crazy. I just, I remember there was
this one day, I can literally remember the first time I ever
heard Raw. I was.
It was in Hadley, MA. I was in the car and 107.3 AAF
was on. Mistress Carrier was playing the
song and Do You Call My Name? Came on.
And I remember we were pulling up to a store and my wife was

(02:10:28):
getting out of the car and I'm like, hang on, I got to finish
this song. It was the first time I ever
heard it and absolutely loved it, which is crazy because Raw's
breakthrough song it it caught my eye.
I beat many people up in the ring over that song.
Like that was my that was my fired up song and stuff.
And then you know that there were other songs on the album

(02:10:48):
that were a little bit more potent.
Sky was one of them. And then the subsequent albums
of just so much different stuff led to different time periods in
my life that Raw just became such a significant influence in
my life. But then, like, just having Raw
as an awareness and influence, Idove into, you know, I followed
you. And then I dove shortly after.

(02:11:10):
You started talking about some spiritual concepts that led into
people like Corey Goode. And I'm trying to have Greg
Braden, you know, like some of those great teachers of the
metaphysical stuff immediately got into the law of one
material. Like something just popped up
one time and it was like RAW thelaw of one material.
And I'm like, the Hell's this? So I got deep into it, and I

(02:11:33):
can't tell you Ben, that was oneof probably the 1st sort of
metaphysical spiritual things that I started to really dive
into deeply. And I'm not sure what it was
about the words 'cause it's really clunky.
I don't know how much you dug. Dug into the long one I've.
Tried. I've read the first book more
than once and I've never read the book.
It's like it's like so dense. It's so it's.
Amazing. But you need like, a microscope.

(02:11:56):
Yeah. And like, it's basically to,
like, get the pieces together. Yeah, it's it's amazing though.
It is amazing. Like there's a facilitator and
somebody who's channeling the material and they just did this
over, I wanna say like 5-6 yearsor something like that.
They just continued this conversation.
Like that. Yeah, it was like. 40 books or
something like some crazy amountof well, it's 4.
Books. Four books.

(02:12:17):
Three or four books. Yep.
But yeah, like that material came out.
I can't tell you how much it resonated when I first read the
The Law of One stuff. And I'm just kind of like, wow,
for some reason, this person whowho is channeling the material
could be completely full of shit.
Like they're fully conscious. They're just making.
This shit up. Like, but, I mean, they they
could have been faking that theywere out, but they were, they

(02:12:39):
were completely out and like everybody vouches for that whole
thing. And there was information that
was corroborated after the fact that that shouldn't like ties in
the information that shouldn't have been known.
And yeah it's it's really reallyimportant and some some other
amazing synchronicities is well first of all as a kid I used to
have dreams of some place that looked like ancient Egypt all

(02:13:02):
the time like recurring dreams one where I was recurring like
many times like chased by giant scarab beetles but always in
like an Egyptian theme. And I I mean post 2014 after all
that crazy upcycling I've had memories of different
civilizations that I was there were pieces of lifetimes that I
remembered that's another whole massive can of worms.

(02:13:24):
But I always felt a tie to Egyptand eventually I realized it was
actually the time before Egypt. The the more ancient
civilizations, anti diluvian civilizations, which was a word
that the first time I heard thatI was like they like like
stopped me dead in my tracks. Like it was like some kind of
trigger that was implanted into me like anti diluvian.

(02:13:45):
Like that word changed my life. Just reading it once in in I
think it might have been in a Carl Jung book because I was way
into Carl Jung in my in my late teens because who isn't when
they're late teens And that wordI was like what the hell like it
is. So I looked it up and it.
Yeah. It's before the before the great

(02:14:06):
flood time before the great flood and you know I I I started
you know I had all these dreams when I was a kid of like that
some kind of Egyptian type civilization only different.
And I I believe it was more thanone civilization, one on this
planet and some on another planet.
Again, we're going off the deep end there.

(02:14:27):
So we'll talk about that anotherday.
But, so I always had a pull to Egyptian stuff.
And when I joined the band RA, that was like, it was like one
of the signs like, all right because RA was kind of already
banned. I mean they were like a local
bands. It's not like they were they
were selling millions of records, but they were local
band based on the New Jersey. And I I had just a band I was in

(02:14:49):
had just broken up, which which again was a local band and I was
just trying to find a singer that was really good.
And I found this band called RA and it was really just one guy
and it was Sahaj who's the singer for RA.
And but the name was like, like,that was one of the big reasons
where I was like, I knew that was my gig.
I was like, when I went down to get that just because of the

(02:15:10):
name, I was like, that's my gig because of that ties.
And then so we recorded our whole first album Under a
pyramid. We built a pyramid in the
studio. That's.
Crazy, I heard. I never heard about that.
That was nuts. Yeah, which, which is
interesting. And it is also interesting, you
know all this David Wilcock typeof information that I read about

(02:15:33):
pyramid structures after that, you know, just just makes it
interesting that that's our album that did the best.
But then come come 2012, I discovered the raw material
which is called The Law of One and Roz first album was called
from One. It was just it was just like

(02:15:53):
more synchronicities that like pointed me towards that
information and just blew my mind though.
I think I asked Sahaj about that.
I'm like, did you have any influence with the the Law of
one? He's like, no, like, he's
definitely not into some of the stuff that we talk about.
But it just that's too much of Asynchronicity for me right
there. It's like, seriously, the name
of the band is raw and you name the album from 1:00, but the law

(02:16:17):
of one material, the stuff that came out all that time from
before, he's like, no, no, no, because it was because the the
original album was just one. It was just raw.
The name of the album was one. And then it evolved.
It was just the EP. It was just a few tracks.
And then he from one was the reason why he called it from
1:00. But it was just like what the.
I just say the the odds of that kind of stuff just blow my mind.

(02:16:39):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sahaj.
Sahaj is. There's definitely a lot of
depth there, but he's very focused on he's.
He's very focused on what he's doing as far as the technical
side of things with music, whichyou know is working for him.
So, so good for him. He's he's not a shallow guy
though, but yeah, he's a. Brilliant dude.
He's definitely not a shallow. Guy we've had, at least not in

(02:17:01):
the past 20 years. He hasn't been diving deep down
those rabbit holes, I don't think.
His episode he did on here was pretty amazing.
He like some of the stuff he came out with, and I've listened
to other episodes that he's doneelsewhere and I tried to get him
to dive deep. We were talking music stuff and
everything, but I tried to, like, uncover the surface.
I'm kind of waiting for the nextalbum or whatever he does to,
like, get him back on so I can dive a little deeper, like, hey,

(02:17:23):
tell me about the music, all right, Let's dive some deep
shit, you know? Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, he's a he's a a gooddude who I've known for for
almost half my life at this point.
Yeah, yeah. But yeah, very synchronistic for
me, like. And yeah, I there's a whole pile

(02:17:44):
of information that I don't wantto get into, but it all ties
back into the blog post. This is the third time I
referenced it that I posted backin November, which was
information. So I released a series of blog
posts in 2017, 2018, and when itcame time to release this
information, I I, like, stopped.I just couldn't bring myself to
do it. So it was like literally like

(02:18:07):
4-4 years later that I actually released the next installment in
my story and it it goes pretty deep into some of that stuff.
I think it's my memory, so I don't remember what the hell I
wrote about it as much as I could at the time.
Anyways, yeah, life is life is astrange and exciting trip when
you allow it to be. This is such a beautiful place

(02:18:29):
to be when you can be in the moment, set down all the
anxieties of the future and all the all the horrible things, the
quote UN quote horrible things in the past that brought you to
where you are. And just being here at this time
of shifting is such a amazing. I think there's I think I think
we got the tickets to the Super Bowl and here we are it's the

(02:18:51):
big game and and we're better than that.
I think we're actually you know there's there's there's a lot of
us who are the ones actually playing the game.
You know we're here whether it'ssome big nefarious game which I
don't think. I think we just set this self up
for ourselves to just see I don't I don't like calling it

(02:19:11):
tests. A lot of people call it tests
but I don't think it's tests. I just, it's not like there's a
wrong answer. Because even if we destroyed
ourselves, I don't think that's a wrong answer.
It's experiential. We're here to experience.
But if we can open up and come into this amount of density,
this amount of forgetting who wetruly are, and still work our
way back to that remembering andcoming back to expanding our

(02:19:33):
consciousness to the point wherewe can realign with the higher
states of ourselves, the higher states of consciousness, and
realign with as close as we can get in this form to the infinite
love that is actually what we are, that is the ultimate win.

(02:19:54):
You know, there's no, there's nowrong answer and there's no real
loss. But I think that's like that's
like, I think that's like the grand experiment like.
Can we put ourselves into this much density, this much strife,
having this long history of warfare and hatred and bigotry
and greed, and get to the point where we can shift our
consciousness of enough to shiftour state of resonance, to

(02:20:16):
create, to move into a higher state of being while we're here
without tearing ourselves apart.And we are at the pinnacle of
that right now. Or at least we're we're
definitely rushing. We're we're rushing towards that
target on the tip of the arrow. It's true.
That's where we are. That's what we're doing.
And it's pretty exciting, even though it can be horrifying at
time. If you get lost into the future

(02:20:37):
and lost into the past with all the things that might happen and
all the things that maybe have happened.
But it's not that scary when you're in the moment and you
remember just to breathe and feel how good it is to be alive.
Because we're here and we're doing something pretty crazy.
You know, we're we're on the forefront of an evolution of
consciousness. Here we are.

(02:20:57):
Here we are. And if and if this whole entire
human experiment, this huge human experience has been
building to a crescendo, we're closer now than we've ever been.
So that's something to that's something to consider.
And with great facilitators and teachers like you out there,
there's many, there's many toolsand many of us that start
banding together and that whole 300th monkey effect, it starts

(02:21:20):
coming into play. And I mean that's another
verifiable scientific thing. So we keep that momentum going.
And there's it's, it's it's inevitable.
As as Agent Smith would say, it's inevitable.
It's. Inevitable.
The 100th Monkeys, Just like thepopcorn.
Yeah, that's right. Our my.
Friend made from sweet potatoes.That's right.

(02:21:42):
Yeah, so wonderful talking to you.
I yeah, I mean, man, we great conversation.
We could do this for for for hours and hours and hours.
It's such a fun conversation. Such a pleasure to talk to you
and and just be here and yeah, thank you.
Thank you for having me for for time #4 for an even deeper
conversation. And thank you for doing

(02:22:02):
everything that you do. Thank you for the influence that
you've been on me. Because this podcast wouldn't
exist if the whole Symphony of how the past 20 years has worked
out to to where it is. And I'm just, I'm honored to
have crossed paths with you. And it's it's crazy, 'cause I
look at you as as just Ben Carroll the friend now and
sometimes I have to kind of likepinch myself be like this dude
was the main guitarist the main guitarist, the my favorite band

(02:22:24):
ever. It's, it's.
It doesn't even feel like the same lifetime.
Doesn't feel like it. Literally doesn't feel like the
same lifetime and but I'm I'm definitely honored to to be in
this experience with you, my man.
Thank you. Thank you.
And let me just if if if folks made it this far, let me just
drop a couple things that I wantto share.
So I'm trying to get better at that.

(02:22:44):
I'm horrible at self promotion. I normally like podcast.
I'm like, I don't want to say anything.
But. I have two online events every
month which are definitely high test highly charged sound layer
with minor old beats singing bowls and I do a lot of singing
and my voice is from the feedback I get is seems to be

(02:23:05):
very powerful for activating fora lot, inactivating for a lot of
people and I absolutely love doing those.
So please come join me for an event.
I also if you go to my website Iactually just launched a brand
new website which I haven't evenofficially launched yet.
So this is like the first time Ieven mentioned it.
I just know the home website calledsoundheelsus.com for all

(02:23:26):
my sound healing stuff because inner self sustained was always
my blog and then like I started doing sound healing stuff and I
just kind of incorporated into there.
But I I re separated them because now that I'm working
towards online courses and all that stuff, but hold on, I'm
like getting ahead of myself. We'll be here for another two
hours. But I I also, you know with with
that I'm I'm doing coaching these days, which has been

(02:23:46):
phenomenal. Teaching people to activate
themselves with sound. You know, whether you want to do
sound just to activate yourself or you're actually a sound
healer. I'm working with both types of
people and I also have a subscription service which has
been going on for a few months where you get access to every
single one of my events as well as two calls a month.

(02:24:07):
One is like AQ and a call or is generally type some type of
sound healing, teaching small stuff.
The other one which I absolutelylove is a call which is just
group toning, getting together and toning together creating
sound and vibration in the body.It's like 1/2 hour group toning
call once a month. That is awesome.
But yeah and then a royalty FreeLibrary.

(02:24:27):
But those two events per month you get all the that stuff with
the subscription, the sacred sound, inner circle.
But yeah, check out my new website, soundhealsus.com.
I'm excited this is the first ever.
Told anybody it wasn't like one of my students.
Or do you need? And I know you've been working
on it, so that's exciting that it's finally coming to fruition.
I'm sure by the time this episode airs, you know, in a few

(02:24:47):
days, weeks, whenever it is, it'll be coming up soon.
That'll be fully active, so we'll link.
It in the show, but I haven't fully active.
I just haven't. I haven't told anybody.
Well kept secret. Yeah but yeah.
Thank you thank you thank you. And I was, I was I I hate self
promoting. So after I after like talk about
myself I'm like. No, but The thing is that.

(02:25:08):
I'm getting. I'm getting more comfortable
doing it. Yeah, you have to do it because
you know, not a lot of people will will.
They'll be followers, they'll enjoy what you do, but not a lot
of people just have that savvy to promote.
So you got to do it yourself forsure.
And it's. I'll tell you everybody if.
And I I really, really believe in what I'm doing like I I I
need it's it's I need to get this in front of more people

(02:25:30):
because I feel it is really beneficial.
It's why I'm here. So I think, feel like now is the
time for growth because what I'mdoing is well honed.
I've been doing it for a decade and I feel something big coming.
Like I was like, we're talking about something's coming, I
don't know what it is, but we'rein another shifting of patterns.
So we're here. And I'm putting myself out there

(02:25:51):
far better than I was capable ofdoing in 2012 because in 2012 I
was just trying to figure out what the fuck is going on.
Now I have a pretty idea, prettygood idea of what's going on,
like what am I going to do to help.
So it's a different, different place to be from.
And here we are doing what we can you with this podcast and
yeah. So thank you.
Thank you. Thank you so much.

(02:26:11):
Thank you, Ben. Thank you for everything you've
done and everything you continueto do.
Always an amazing time chatting with Ben, hoping to see him a
bit more regularly so we can dive into some of the writings
that he's had over the years. Very profound stuff.
Check out some of the things he was talking about at his blog at
innerselfsustain.com and dive into some of the things he was
kind of dropping some tidbits onand head over to Sound Heels dot

(02:26:34):
USI think he said it a little bit different on the episode,
but it's sound heels dot US. I'll link it in the show notes.
Go join in for some of his live events, either online or in
person. I know that he's starting to do
live events again, but they are unlike anything you've ever
experienced. I can definitely assure you that
one. He's also diving into some
retreats as well, just having his inaugural one in November of

(02:26:55):
2023 and I fully plan to get some of the ones that he's going
to have going on in 2024, but those are in the works, so check
those out as well. And lastly, I'm going to throw
some love to Ben's partner, the amazingly talented artist
Jeanine Burgess, who has createdsome of the works of art that I
have in the background of the show from time to time.
From sacred Geometry designs andSri Yantras to her newest wall

(02:27:16):
calendar for 2024. So if you'd like some of what
you've seen in the show, head onover to janineburgess.com to get
some of your own. I've given many of these away as
gifts because they are simply amazing and she is an amazingly
talented person, so head to that.
I will put the link for that in the show notes as well.
Thank you all for listening and we'll see you next time.

(02:27:37):
Keep living.

All Episodes

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

24/7 News: The Latest

Dateline NBC

The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Ep. 130: Down The Rabbit Hole w/ Ben Carroll

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

.css-r6mb8g{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:1;overflow:hidden;}24/7 News: The Latest

Dateline NBC

The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show

All Episodes

Ep. 130: Down The Rabbit Hole w/ Ben Carroll

24/7 News: The Latest