The Free Miracle Drug Your Brain is Begging For

Episode Transcript
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Jana Shelfer (00:00):
Are you ready to create a life you crave?
Let's spin that doom loop ofnegativity into an upward
success cycle and start LivingLucky®.
Good morning.
I'm Jana, I'm Jason and we areLiving Lucky®.
You are too.
Give me the quote, baby.

Jason Shelfer (00:21):
No amount of regret changes the past, no
amount of anxiety changes thepast.
No amount of anxiety changesthe future.
But any amount of gratitudechanges the present.

Gratitude.
I often call it the fertilizerof any garden.

Fertilizer of life.

However, the way you just phrased that just now,
it makes me feel like gratitudeis power.

Gratitude is power and oftentimes, gratitude
is that thing that will bring usto the now.
Even if we're grateful forsomething in the past, grateful
for something in the future,grateful for something that's
coming, it brings us to the.
I am grateful for this, nowsomething that's coming.

It brings us to the.
I am grateful for this now, soit brings us into the present.

Yes, because a lot of times that feeling that
we're feeling is happening now,right Like we're bringing it to
ourselves right now, and thatfeeling that we're having is
going to impact or influence thenext action that we're going to
take.
So the thoughts that we'rehaving, the feelings that we're
having, influences whatever nextaction that we're going to move
towards.

I feel like gratitude changes our state.
So, no matter where we're at,if we can tap into gratitude,
then that will affect ourthoughts, it affects our actions
, it affects our energy and theway we're showing up.
I just feel like gratitude issuch a.

(01:51):
It seems so simple and yet itis so powerful.

The thing is it's free.
It's freaking free andeveryone's like it's free.
It's not valuable enough for me.
Free and everyone's like it'sfree.

It's not valuable enough for me, like I want
something that's worth more.
I often feel like the bestthings in life are free.
Oh, we should make a quoteabout that that should be the
next podcast, right.

The best things in life are free.
Is there a song?
I feel like there's a song.
Okay, I feel like that's alyric in someone's song.

I mean, somebody has said that.

So when you mentioned that gratitude changes
your energy, it also changesour chemistry, like literally
our physical chemistry in ourbodies, because it affects us
physiologically.

Yes, it starts changing our, it gets into your
cells.

The chemicals our brain releases.
It does.
No, it does I know.

I've read all about this and if I tried to
tell you exactly the oxytocinand the serotonin and all of
those feel good hormones.
I'm going to sound like I don'tknow what I'm talking about, so
let's don't go there, Chama.

I'm not a rocket surgeon.

But it does, the minute that I stop and say, okay
, how can I be grateful for this, even when things aren't
working for?

me when they don't seem like they are working
out the way I want them.

When they don't seem like they are working for
me, If I can take a moment andfind gratitude and literally say
how is this serving me?

What's great about this?

What is great about this?
That's a better question.
What is great about this?

Which will lead you into the how is this serving
me?

Because when you find what's great about this, it
will start serving you and youstart realizing that the
universe is always, alwaysworking in your favor.

And it's powerful Gratitude also gives you
everything you need to work with.

Okay, so read the quote again and let's just
dissect this a little bit.

The quote is no amount of regret changes the
past.

Stop, stop.
So, let's go there, becausethere are times I am very guilty
of this where I start lookingback and say, oh, I wish I would
have done it this way.
I wish I would have said this,I wish I would have sent that.
Thank you note that I wasthinking about sending I wish, I
wish, I wish.

I would say that everyone has a tendency to
ruminate.

However, I'm just beating myself up when I do that
, and there is something insideJana.
Listen to me talking aboutmyself in third person but there
is something about Jana that ishearing me say I wish I would
have done it differently, and italmost, in a way, is telling my
soul that the way I showed upwas not enough.

(04:44):
The word enough.

Yeah.
So everyone does this.
Everyone replays in their mind,ruminates and says okay, how
might I have done it differently?
However, they don't say howmight I have done it differently
.
They say they don't say howmight I have done it differently
.
They say I wish that I had.
I should have.
I want to go back and, and thetruth is, we can't go back and I

(05:09):
was supposed to yeah.
So all these things about theruminating, so we have all this
regret about how we should havedone something.

Which, if you just even listen to the language.

Right.

That is a big.

It's abusive.

Warning sign.

So it's abusive.
It forms regret in your mindand then it says you're not
enough, and all this stuff.

It takes away from you.
It's being abusive to yourself.
Yes.

It takes away.
So the key there is oh my God,I've never considered myself an
abuser.
The key is just catch thethought.
Oh, I'm so embarrassed.
So just catch the thought andthen say okay, let's reframe it
and say we can go back to ourquestions about what did I do
well?
So now we say now we findgratitude.

If you ever need help reframing, reach out to
Jason.
He may be the king of thereframe.

So then we just say what did I do?
Well, that's a lead intogratitude, right?

Oh my gosh, okay.
So what's the next sentence?
The?

next part is no amount of anxiety changes the
future.
Because we worry about so much.
I think I learned this from mymom.
And here's the thing Because weworry about so much.

I think I learned this from my mom, and here's the
thing.
I'm not putting her downbecause I feel like she does it
out of love.

Right and protection.

And protection, and she just wants the best for
her kids and her family.
However, I have started to dothis.
It feels especially as I getolder.

I found myself worrying about my health, and we
do this out of love andprotection for ourselves, when
we can start saying, okay, howdo I love myself enough to take
a chance, how do I protectmyself enough to not suffer
regret in the future?
Yes, yes, so and that's so,there's different light bulb

(07:05):
moments.

There's different reframes, as you're listening.

Yeah, there's different reframes, because what
happens is we get taught thatthis is the way to love, this is
the way to protect, this is theway for safety.

Yeah, no, I feel okay.
So along those lines, you know,my mom has always been a worry
wart.
In fact, she would probablycall herself a worry wart.

Oh, I'm such a worry wart.

Yes, just like that.

And when you say I am, you are.

And when you say I am, and also so growing up
under that.
There's probably something inmy subconscious mind that has
learned that's the way you love.

My grandmother used to say I worry, so nothing
happens which is weird.
That's a limiting belief rightthere, because she would worry
about everything and it becamelike almost a joke of the family
.
Don't worry, because Mimi'sworrying about it.
And the problem, though, isthat the more Mimi worries and

(08:09):
brings that feeling everybodycan feel it, yeah, and she also
teaches you that somebody needsto be doing the worrying.

And she also.
It's inadvertently teaching youto be scared.

Yes.
And she's building a thatthere's something to worry about
.

A fear wall.

Yeah.

A fear wall.

It's crazy.
Yeah, we really do create ourreality when what we could be
doing is teaching aboutgratitude.
So Papa and Mimi, both alsowere very focused in on
gratitude.
They were so grateful for somany things.

Including Mimi's worry.

Right.
So that's another thing.
I think a lot of times we needto start saying, okay, well, how
can I lessen some of thesethings that make me feel anxious
, make me feel like some of thelike?
It's nothing wrong with feelingthese feelings, it's just
examining the thought andgetting curious around it.

And also letting it go, because you know what we
feel is contagious to thosearound us.

That's so big.
If someone is feeling stressedout out and it's passed down to
generation and generation andgeneration like.

that's how I learned to love is to worry
about people, and that's that'sa limiting belief when we could
just love fully and connectdeeper and know that, no matter
what happens, our loved oneswill be able to handle it.
We have to trust that right.

Because we're strong, capable survivors and
thrivers.

And we've gotten this far.

We ain't going to stop here.

Okay, so then the last part of this sentence.

So I'm going to start from the beginning, okay,
so no amount of regret changesthe past, no amount of anxiety
changes the future.
But any amount of gratitudechanges the present.
I love this Any amount so much,because if you feel like you
have absolutely nothing, yes, ifyou feel like you are empty,

(10:08):
the well is dry.
Find something to be gratefulfor.
Now you have a morsel ofmoistness to drink from.

You had to throw in the word moistness.

I love the word moist.

I am so grateful for your wisdom.
Thank you for sharing.
I appreciate that.
Thank you for being here.
Have a great day.

Keep Living Lucky®.

Bye-bye.
If the idea of Living Lucky®appeals to you, visit us at www.
LivingLucky.
com.

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