LooseLeaf NoteBook with Julia Adolphe

Composer Frank Ticheli shares his experience with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, which manifested in his 30's in the form of chronic pain and impeded his ability to compose. We discuss how Frank reframed his relationship to his writing process in order to reconnect with his work, difficulties with medication and therapy, and how cultivating a dialogue with one's subconscious enriches creativity. Lastly, we discuss Frank's An America...

Two-time Grammy Award-winning mezzo-soprano Sasha Cooke shares her experience of imposter syndrome, a feeling that one is not worthy or deserving of one's success. We discuss how these inner bullying voices originated in relation to her body image and how music became a safe, empowering space. Lastly, Sasha shares how couples therapy and practicing gratitude enable her to take ownership and responsibility for her personal and music...

Psychiatrist Alana Mendelsohn, MD, PhD, Catherine Hancock, and Katya Gruzgliina share the mission of Creatives Care, which aims to partner artists with affordable mental health care providers and help individuals assess what kind of therapy might be right for their specific needs. Our conversation covers why therapy is particularly beneficial for artists, how to understand when you might need help, and how to handle obstacles that ...

Composer Andrew Norman shares how his creative anxiety has led him into a current period of writer's block. We discuss how his frenetic language captures how thoughts move in his mind, the underlying sources of his anxiety, and brainstorm together how he can move forward to reconnect with the joy of his creative process.

This episode of LooseLeaf NoteBook is supported by New Music USA and featured on NewMusicBox. 

www.andrewnor...

Conductor Ryan McAdams shares how the myth of the "ideal" conductor, perpetuated at conservatory and within Western culture, glorifies destructive lifestyles such as living in isolation, excessive behaviors, constant striving for perfection, appearing omniscient, and hiding all human vulnerabilities. In order to manage these impossible professional standards, Ryan believes many conductors turn towards self-destructive behaviors, an...

Violinist Maia Jasper White shares how her relationship to music-making changed as she cared for her young daughter, who underwent surgery for craniosynostosis and a subsequent period of PTSD. We discuss how Maia temporarily stepped away from creative work and how the personal crisis changed her understanding of her own artistic expression. As co-founder of The Salastina Music Society, Maia shares her experience performing for hosp...

I reflect on why art is always imperfect and unpack a wave of anxiety that emerged for me while finishing a large-scale work for the LA Philharmonic. With some advice from my creative coach, Cherry Jeffs, I was able to move past emotional blocks and tackle the work's conclusion.

If you're curious about creative coaching, you can visit Cherry's website and read her book on finishing projects here

Questions or comments may be sha...

Co-hosts of the Trilloquy podcast Garrett McQueen and Scott Blankenship share their experiences with depression, therapy, medication, cannabis, creativity, and addiction. They discuss how they continue to navigate their professional and personal relationship following Garrett's controversial termination from American Public Media, the original owner of Trilloquy and parent company to Minnesota Public Radio, where the two worked tog...

Composer Christopher Trapani shares his experience with clinical depression and how it impacts the nature of his creative process, memory, and communication. Chris discusses how he both evades and encodes the filter of depression into his music, myths about the tortured artist, medication, and therapy, and how mental health challenges can be better addressed in the workplace and in schools.

www.christophertrapani.com

Questions or c...

The idea that art stems from deep suffering is ingrained in Western European classical tradition. I share my thoughts on why this myth is attractive to society and to myself personally, as I was struggling to come to terms with my Anxiety Disorder. Belief in this myth ultimately did me more harm than good, and I discuss why I've let go of this romanticized, if not dangerous notion of the creative process.

For questions or comment...

Violinists & yoga instructors Melissa White & Elena Urioste share why they founded Intermission Sessions, a program uniting musicianship, movement & mindfulness that emphasizes individual focus on one's own physical & emotional needs. We discuss the impact of abusive or unsupportive teachers & methodologies in conservatory life that strip power from students instead of inspiring self-care and compassion. Elena & Melissa share their...

States of high anxiety can produce thought patterns similar to those experienced during the creative process - seemingly disparate thoughts connect to create new meanings and stories - but there are also stark differences between imaginative impulses and anxious physiological signals. I unpack the positive and negative impacts of anxiety on creative work, and why the two are easily confused.

Questions or comments may be shared on...

Conductor & composer Daniela Candillari shares how she discovered surprising musical and personal truths about herself through new and pleasurable activities, such as pottery and gardening, while she strove to cope with her forced hiatus from conducting caused by the pandemic. We discuss how play, meditation, letting go of control, and deep listening impact creativity and mental health. Daniela reflects on her personal experience w...

Pianist and Music Educator Cindy Lam shares her experience of PTSD, initially triggered by surviving a car accident at 18, which temporarily threatened her musical capabilities, and heightened in 2020 by the loss of her father to a rare genetic Prion disease. Cindy discusses her ongoing healing process, the importance of sharing one's story, finding joy through teaching and musical expression, and feeling strong enough to momentari...

Composer Sarah Kirkland Snider shares her experience with Generalized Anxiety Disorder & Major Depressive Disorder and how they impact her creative process. She unpacks the shame and stigma surrounding mental health challenges, the toxic myth of the tortured artist, strategies for coping and silver linings of hypersensitivity, and the importance of nurturing support systems within our families, universities, and professional commun...