How to See What’s Holding You Back as a Leader with Martin Dubin

Episode recap  

 

In this episode, I sat down with Dr. Martin Dubin — a clinical psychologist turned entrepreneur and executive coach — to unpack the blind spots that quietly sabotage leaders. Marty’s journey from therapy rooms to boardrooms shaped his book Blindspotting, where he helps executives see what they can’t see about themselves. We dug into why even the smartest leaders miss their own patterns, how to build self-awareness without beating yourself up, and why humility and small shifts matter more than big transformations. 

 

Key Insights: 

• Blind spots aren’t flaws — they’re unseen patterns. Marty explained how our minds naturally focus on familiar territory, leaving some behaviors invisible to us.
• Six areas to watch: identity, motives, traits, emotions, intellect, and behavior — all interconnected layers that shape how leaders show up. 
• Awareness beats overhaul. Growth happens through small, intentional adjustments, not massive self-reinventions. 
• Humility is the gateway to insight. The best leaders don’t try to be perfect — they stay curious about what they might be missing. 
• Self-awareness drives effectiveness. Understanding your motives and emotional triggers helps you lead with more clarity, empathy, and confidence. 

BIO:

 

Martin Dubin is a clinical psychologist, serial entrepreneur, business coach, and adviser to C-suite executives and Silicon Valley entrepreneurs. He founded several companies, including a multimillion-dollar health care company where he also served as CEO. A former coach at the Center for Creative Leadership and a partner at talent firm RHR International, he worked directly with hundreds of C-suite senior executives from Fortune 500 companies and with Silicon Valley venture capital firms and their portfolio companies. 

 

Quotes: 

•  “Self-awareness is the single most important tool of your leadership.”
• “You are the tool of your leadership, so the better you know yourself, the better you lead.”
• “Your greatest strength becomes a blind spot the moment you overdo it.”
• “Stress narrows your motives, so you default to survival instead of wise leadership.”
• “Real change in leaders comes from small tweaks, not dramatic transformation.” 

 

Takeaways: 

• Name your core strengths, then ask what happens when you are too much of that strength to uncover likely blind spots.
• Notice when your role has changed but your identity has not and ask if you are still leading like your old job.
• Pay attention to emotional overreactions after meetings; they are clues to motives or values you may not fully understand.
• Stop trying to be the smartest person in the room and start asking more questions to draw out the intelligence of your team.
• Focus on small, intentional behavioral changes rather than chasing a complete personal transformation. 

 

Timestamps: 

 

[00:00] Marcel’s intro: why what used to work in leadership suddenly stops working

[02:40] Marty’s story from clinical psychologist to entrepreneur to executive coach 

[07:20] The spark behind Blind Spotting and why entrepreneurs reveal raw blind spots 

[09:06] Why is it so hard for leaders to see their own blind spots 

[11:31] The six blind spot areas and the “target” model are explained 

[13:15] Identity blind spots and the pain of transitioning into new roles 

[16:12] Traits, emotions, and intellect as hard-to-change parts of our wiring 

[20:37] Emotional blind spots, EQ, and using feelings strategically at work 

[22:41] Different kinds of intellect and how over-reliance on smarts backfires 

[27:49] Motives at the center: power, achievement, affiliation, and values 

[32:30] How stress distorts motives and narrows our leadership choices 

[33:16] A simple exercise to find blind spots by adding “too” to your strengths 

[34:17] Why sustainable growth comes from small behavioral tweaks, not wholesale reinvention 

[35:13] Speed round: what makes Marty smile, big life lessons, and hopes for the future 

[37:45] Leading with love by accepting yourself and using what you have 

[38:16] Final takeaway: start somewhere small and let self-awareness do its work 

 

Conclusion: 

 

This conversation reminds us that leadership is fundamentally an inside job. Blind spots are not signs of failure but evidence that we are human, shaped by patterns, histories, and motives we do not always see. By understanding identity shifts, naming our traits and emotional patterns, and getting honest about what truly drives us, we gain more choice in how we show up. Rather than chasing dramatic transformation, Marty urges leaders to embrace small, focused behavioral changes—asking more