September 5, 2024 • 47 mins
This episode is a radical call forward and call to action for you to deepen authenticity, Truth, and purpose by making the decision to awaken, heal and love. As you do this, you consciously return to love and in turn change the world. 🤍
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Join us as we discuss consciously returning to love through the lenses of authenticity, purpose, and Truth. We vulnerably share our recent journey of realigning with authenticity, discuss love as Truth, and most importantly deep dive into purpose. As we explore purpose we tie it all back to Loving Consciously's motto of "awaken, heal, love." As always, we love you!
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Learn more at www.lovingconsciously.net and connect with us on Instagram @loving.consciously @loving.consciously.podcast @amerislovesyou
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
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We don't have, you know, a war problem, a politics problem, a poverty problem.
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We have a consciousness problem. And the only way to consciously return to love as a species on
this planet, the only way to fix any of these problems is to fix the consciousness. And that
means starting within. Because the only consciousness you can fix, and the only place that you can
truly control and return to love is with yourself. Because until we radically love and accept and
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honor the holistic being that we are, we can't look out at the world and love and accept and
honor what's happening. The answer is within. It's all within you, friend. You have the power
to change the world just by healing yourself. That's all you have to do. That's really all
that we are here to do. Awaken to who we are and live from that place. Heal everything that we've
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experienced. Shed anything that is not from love. And then return to love. Live from a place of truth.
What is your purpose in the awakening of humanity? And if you don't have that answer yet,
just knowing that the only purpose that you're truly here to do is to remember who you are,
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heal yourself, and choose love. If you can do those three things, you have changed the world.
And so with love, we both encourage, invite, welcome you into this revolution with us to awaken,
heal, and love yourself so that you can consciously return to love.
Welcome home to the Love Inconsciously podcast. My name is Ameris. And my name is Eric. And if you
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are like us, nobody taught you how to love. We are best friends and life partners here to
vulnerably and authentically share our journey while exploring the sacred realms of love,
consciousness, relationships, spirituality, and all that they encompass. The intention of this show
is to help you consciously relate to yourself, others, and everything else in this universe.
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Together, we can embody a more intentional and fulfilling way of giving and receiving love.
Loving consciously. Through eight years together, we have had the opportunity to overcome deep
patterning and programming, as well as trauma related to mental health, addiction, pregnancy,
loss, infidelity, and immense grief. After six years of experiencing these challenges with no
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knowledge on how to heal or love each other, we separated. After us both spiritually awakening
and recommitting, we formed our conscious partnership and have spent the last two years
cultivating a divine union founded on unconditional love, devotion, and commitment to personal growth.
Thank you for joining us and doing the work alongside us as we explore this beautiful world
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of love and consciousness to co-create a new world of love. As you courageously walk this path,
remember to have grace with yourself and know that you have both the capacity to love consciously
and the power to always choose love. Namaste and welcome back to the Loving Consciously podcast.
This is Consciously Returning to Love. This is episode 36 and I could not think of a title
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that could better describe the last few weeks of our life and our experience,
as well as what is happening in the collective right now. So we're going to get really deep into
what is Consciously Returning to Love? How do you as an individual, you and your relationships,
and us as a collective humanity on this planet, consciously return to the state of love? Which
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we know of course is our natural state and is the age of consciousness that we are moving into.
It has been three weeks since we've been here solo together talking about a teaching topic,
because three weeks ago we had our anniversary episode, which is kind of like a special celebration
episode, and then two weeks ago we had the launch of our new series Loving Conversations.
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This one was with Rachel and Ryan, where we bring on other conscious individuals to talk about how
that is working in their relationship, whatever format that is. And then last week we took a break.
And as we've said on here before, we don't love taking weeks off. We really reserve them these
days for when they're needed. And there is absolutely no way that either one of us had the energy in
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our cup or in our capacity to record an episode last week. And so as always, it's that delicate
balance between commitment and honoring your energetic bandwidth. Last week was a really
intense energetic week. We're moving every day, every two days max, and we were just absolutely
exhausted. And so we opted to skip a week. We're back today. We have so many updates.
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The last time that we gave you personal updates was three weeks ago, and we were in Sioux Falls,
South Dakota, and we had just made the decision to get back on the road and do the right half of
the country. Well, in the last three weeks, we have seen 12 states, two national parks,
and our second Canada province, which was going to Toronto. It has been a wild three weeks. We
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had some really big car troubles along the way. And in that, we had a really beautiful experience
of divine protection and guidance where we really had this theme this last few weeks in
consciously returning to love of bringing God's Source Creator back to the center of our lives,
of our relationship. And so that was a beautiful opportunity to lean on that divinity, that divine
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connection to Source in navigating that. We've had some really difficult decisions that we've had the
opportunity to make in returning to love, authenticity, purpose, and truth. That's really been this theme
around consciously returning to love. And that has included decisions around relationships in our
lives and, you know, things that we were holding and keeping as a commitment for commitment's sake.
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And, you know, we have a beautiful episode on devotion and commitment. If you want to go back
and listen to that, but it's really called us forward to look at where we are potentially
out of alignment and not even from malice, just from those subtle ways in which we fall out of
alignment. We fall out of love. We fall out of truth. Last big theme here is we have really
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deeply been reexamining our boundaries and our romantic relationship. You know, this partnership
is multifaceted. There are many, many hats that we wear together, just one of them being our
romantic partnership. And we've spent the last two weeks having some really tough conversations
around what that looks like, what's serving us, what's not serving us, and if we wanted to continue
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that portion of our relationship. So as you can see, it has been a wild three weeks, as always,
with these two crazy people who change their entire life environment and home every one to four days.
We are coming to you live today from, I actually had to think about this for a second, Albany,
New York. We just came from Niagara Falls. That's where we were kind of stuck an extra couple of
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days for car repairs. And yesterday we drove across the entire state of New York to make it over here
to Albany. We are on our way to Maine, and then we'll start heading south. So it's happening so fast.
We did all of the Midwest. We're now in the Northeast. It's beautiful. It's starting to be fall.
There's no better place to be in fall than the Northeast. So we're so excited. Moving into today's
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topic, consciously returning to love. We're going to take this from a personal angle, and then we're
going to take this from a collective angle. We really think there's a benefit in vulnerably and
authentically sharing our experience through our lives. And then we're going to switch into looking
at what the heck is happening in the world right now and how do we consciously return to love as
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a species as one big soul family. Personally, we're going to look at this from three angles as
individuals in our relationship and in this podcast. And I actually want to start with this podcast
because this is where we are. And this podcast is deeply important to both of us. Eric's over here
nodding along. And we had some tough decisions to make this last few weeks. As we have been looking
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at authenticity specifically, you know, I mentioned these three words earlier, authenticity, purpose,
and truth. I'm actually doing an Instagram live on these three words later today. As we started
looking at these, one of the things that came up for examination was this podcast. In examining this
podcast and where we were headed, we kind of came to the difficult and necessary truth that we were
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starting to, we hadn't actually pulled the trigger yet, but we were starting to move into the space
of interviewing people who were big in the space just because they were big in the space or interviewing
people that you just kind of interviewed because those are the people in the spiritual space that
people interview or people who asked to be on the podcast. And maybe we felt obligated.
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And it was really difficult because we had to reach out to some people and say, hey,
there's absolutely no reason other than it just doesn't feel an alignment for us. You know,
if it's not a 100%, yes, it's a no. In having those conversations, we came to a deepening again and a
profound commitment and realization that we are not willing to have anyone on this show that is not
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in complete and total alignment with our mission of love and of consciousness and of truth. And,
you know, up until this point, all of our guests have really been embodying that in their work,
in their lives, and we've realized that resonance and that mission must be in alignment. And we
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can't just have people on the show for exposure's sake or for, you know, the other things that we
mentioned. And so it was this really deep self honesty and honesty between each other of what are
we creating here and why? And is it about numbers or is it about impacting the lives of the people
who are listening authentically? And so I'm really proud of us for reaching that place and making
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those tough decisions. It isn't easy to say no to people. And it's really calling us forward as
leaders of this show to make those tough decisions around what is aligned and not even just what
is aligned because one of these people, for example, was aligned. It just wasn't what we wanted to be
talking about. It was a very interesting experience for us to have people who were aligned and doing
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good work and it not fully resonating with this show. And it was an experience of practicing
boundaries and really honing in and focusing on what is the calling of the show? What is the message
and ensuring that everything is in alignment with that. And in this practice, it extended out into
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our individual lives too of understanding where are we not in alignment with our true purpose
and our mission and in love in our own lives. And it's so interesting how we can subtly start to
leak energy as we, at least for myself, go back into kind of those people pleasing
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program elements that most of this society has grown up with and wanting to cater to everybody
and wanting to have a really open and inclusive space where we can give everybody a voice
and then balancing and recognizing that if we do that, the message gets diluted. The true
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authentic compass of what this podcast is becomes muddied with everybody else's energy.
I think that was a really great segue into talking about us as individuals. You briefly
touched on it there because that has been a huge part of the last few weeks, especially I'll talk
about mine if you want to share about yours. That's why I'm doing this live later today. For me,
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it has been a really big journey of realizing that I had very subtly and very slowly fallen out of
alignment in purpose and authenticity and truth, specifically like you said, in relationships and
in things in my life, things that I was doing or leading or committed to or participating in,
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relationships that I knew somewhere deep down were no longer in alignment. And the theme that I
noticed around all of these things, a podcast individually and what we're about to talk about
in our relationship was the kind of avoidance of the uncomfortable. And it's not even conflict,
it's the avoidance of consciously sharing that and of consciously saying, hey, this interviewer
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doesn't feel in alignment or hey, this relationship is no longer resonating with me. For me, that is,
I think even harder than the unconscious version, which is like avoiding conflict, right? It has
been really challenging for me to step into and navigate how to lovingly and consciously say no
and end something and put those boundaries up. You know, I don't want to do that interview. I feel
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obligated because you reached out or this relationship is no longer resonating because I don't
stand for the values that this person may be holding in their container in their life. And so,
yeah, it's just been really interesting as individuals navigating that. That's been my
experience is that like uncomfortable feeling when, you know, I have to share that truth and
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speaking truth and speaking it authentically when you know, it's maybe not what the other person
wants to hear. And I feel like that's really the embodiment of authenticity. It's really asking
yourself, are you living in alignment with truth and purpose and love and being authentic, even
when it's not easy, when it's uncomfortable. And again, this isn't even always conscious for us,
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which we're going to move now after you share yours into talking about our relationship. This
happened very, very subtly, a little, little inch here and there. And then we woke up a
month later and they're like, Whoa, wait a minute, this is not an alignment. How did we get here?
And that's what we mean when we say, you know, patterning and ego and all these things can
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be really sneaky, right? It happens very subtly. And so it's just been this really abrupt, okay,
wait a minute, time to come back to center, reevaluate our life, our boundaries, our commitments,
all of the things, our relationship, our purpose in this individuals, and make sure that everything's
in alignment and make a lot of really challenging, but necessary and beautiful loving conscious
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decisions to cut the cords where they need to be cut. And it's so important to have these check-ins
with yourself and with those who you're relating with, because it really is so subtle, the journey
into getting to this place where we're leaking our energy, where we're saying yes, when it's not 100%
yes. What's really important is learning how to say no, and learning how to set those boundaries,
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and to be able to admit to yourself from an authentic place, what is a yes and what is a no.
And doing all that from a place of love, because the way it showed up in my experience in the past
is by shutting down and not responding or pulling my energy away in a very quiet manner,
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and just kind of not dealing with these things. And then utilizing circumstances in my outside
environment to create a victim narrative that allows me to sit in that place and not do anything
about it. And so my work to do is to shed those narratives, step into my voice, and set those
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boundaries in an effort to truly align myself with my purpose, and recognizing the limited bandwidth
that I currently have, and where that energy is needed most in my life. Moving into our third
point here, our relationship on this kind of personal section. As I shared in the intro,
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it has been a really deep and vulnerable and uncomfortable journey around talking about
our romantic relationship. In many lights, you know, where is it serving us? Where is it not
serving us? Is that part of our relationship still in alignment for both of our highest good,
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and for both of our individual purposes? Because when you've been with someone as long as we have,
the lines of individuality naturally so get blurry. And if you're in any type of long-term
partnership, and I would say, you know, when you start getting into multiples of years, you know,
one, two, three, four years, and especially after, you know, five, six, seven, you really start to become
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one. And that's beautiful, right? The work and the challenges in remembering that you're individuals.
And for me, it was very much a journey of, you are my best friend, you are my co-host of this show,
you know, we are business partners, we are travel buddies, we are so many things, co-puppy parents.
Romanticism or the romantic relationship is one of, you know, a dozen or more pillars that we share.
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And so it was really looking at and asking what was reflected back to us as, you know, pretty rare
and something I've definitely never had in our relationship before, asking the really tough
question of, is that pillar still in alignment? And can or should we move into those other pillars
and sunset that pillar? It's really interesting because in having such a vulnerable conversation,
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and it's a continued conversation, it has opened the door for more intimacy and more closeness
and more affection and more tenderness. It's like the crux of the human condition, right? Just by
being willing to have that conversation and say, hey, is the romantic portion of our relationship
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still where we want to be going? The romantic portion of our relationship grew. And so, you know,
that's what we've been doing, especially this last week since we took the break is really shutting
it down. We really closed out the outside distractions, came within to us and this romantic
partnership and made very intentional and conscious decisions to cultivate that connection and give
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that part of our relationship some more space, some more love. And before that conversation,
you know, we were experiencing a really challenging time in this partnership centered around the
romantic pillar in that it really wasn't at the forefront of this partnership. All of the other
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hats were really taking the energetic bandwidth. And for me, I can say that my energy wasn't
directly going into cultivating a romantic container. And after all that time of it not
being addressed and being at the forefront, this sort of shadow in our experience became active.
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And my unconsciousness started reacting to things that were present in the in the partnership.
And there was actually quite a bit of like masculine and feminine conflict dynamics that
showed up for us. And it wasn't until we sat down and had this conversation and brought these
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things to the light that we were able to create a space of vulnerability and start to move through
it. For me, it was so powerful to have this conversation with you with the deep trust and
knowing that just because we're talking about our romantic partnership and the potential of
sunsetting that or shifting into a new style of relating with one another didn't mean that we
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as a unit, as friends, as so many other things, would just be disbanded and discarded.
Yeah, and for me, you know, it was almost like by just giving and allowing me the space to even
ponder that question, which historically up to this point would have never happened. This is
definitely one of our deepest rooted unhealthy attachment styles. Just giving me that space to
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say, Hey, I'd like to ponder this question and have this conversation and you being like, okay,
this is uncomfortable. I don't want to do this, but I'm willing to move to that uncomfortability.
What's coming up for you, I think is what you said, where are you being called? What are you
feeling you need or what are you feeling is in need of attention? And I remember the moment you
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asked me that question and just being like, Oh, literally just like, not holding me down and
being like, no, wait, we have to be together romantically as it may have been in the past.
It was immediately like, Oh, okay, cool. Yeah, like I want to have this conversation. I want to
work through this. I'm actually wanting more time and energy and attention on the romantic pillar.
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I don't want it to end. I just don't want it to be this way. Right. And I think that is a beautiful
segue into moving into this collective piece and what consciously returning to love is. It's not
even so much wanting something to end, right, giving our energy to like ending something. It's
putting our energy on how do we grow love because the kind of like secret here on returning to love
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is we never really actually left love. It's a consciousness thing. And so it's bringing our
consciousness back into the reality, the frequency, the vibration of love. And I think we've done that
and I think we've done that really beautifully this last week. It's been really, really vulnerable
and really uncomfortable. Those are the only two words I could possibly use. And so if you're
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in any type of relationship where maybe you want to have that conversation,
doesn't even have to be romantic, but some pillar of some relationship you are in,
it could be a friend, a coworker, your child is feeling out of alignment. We would really encourage
you to have that difficult conversation because by being vulnerable and saying, hey, something's not
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feeling like full love here and how do we work together to return to that love? You can open
the door for so much more vulnerability and connection and authenticity. And that of course
is what we're moving towards here. That's what we want to cultivate as we consciously return to love.
The most important part of a conversation like this is the two pillars of love and authenticity.
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If we approach this conversation from a place of achieving a desired outcome,
which I'm speaking to from experience, that laces the conversation with inauthentic energy,
because the whole basis of a check in like this is to be completely open to what is in store.
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And that might look like a relationship changing its form. The real work is saving space for that
reality and supporting one another in that transition, whatever that may look like.
If that's not the case, then it's supporting each other in returning to the romantic side of things.
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You touched on something so important there that we talked about way back in the beginning of the
show. I believe it was new ways of loving, which is like one of our first 10 episodes,
where we talked about returning to love does not mean returning to relationship. And this is
something that I'm navigating in a lot of my familial relationships at this time, is helping
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people readjust their definition of love, because we live in a world where it's like, love is always
being with this person. Love is never giving up on your vow of marriage. Conscious love,
conscious relating is much higher than that. One of our closest and dearest friends right now is
navigating, ending a four and a half year conscious partnership marriage, and they are doing it
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consciously with love. And it's beautiful and obviously painful to witness because they know,
as we are saying here, and as you touched on, returning to love doesn't always mean that you
return to whatever the relationship looked like before. And so I love so much that you called
that out. It's going to be really important in this next section we're moving into on the collective,
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because we obviously to consciously return to love first have to even heal and define what love is
and what our relationship to love is. And I think we've talked a lot about that on the show, we'll
obviously keep talking about it, because no one taught us how to love. And there are very, very
unhealthy, egoic based beliefs and ideas and attachments around what love quote unquote is
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or looks like love doesn't always feel good, right? If you love your child, and they want to do something
that is unsafe to their life, like their being, and you say no, and they don't feel good, right?
They're really upset, they think you're mean, there's quote unquote conflict, and they, you know,
storm away. Did you do that because you loved them? Well, of course you love them and loving them is
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keeping them safe from doing this, you know, unsafe thing. And so I use that example to
show love does not always look like the, you know, unicorny rainbow thing. It's very complex. Love is
much more than that. And so consciously returning to love really requires us to check our egos and
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know why are we having this conversation? What is our intention here? And I'm so proud of you
this time for me bringing this conversation to the table and saying, Hey, I'm feeling like the
romantic pillar of our relationship is not an alignment at this time with what I would like
from a romantic relationship. How can we work together to have a conversation around this?
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And you coming at that the way that you did and saying, Okay, the intention here is to return to
love, whatever that looks like, not my ego is attached to the outcome of keeping this romantic
partnership. And so I'm coming at this for misaligned energy. And that right there is our
biggest piece of advice. Again, if you are navigating a relationship, any type, and you are
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having a need or a desire to have any of these conversations around alignment and truth and
returning to love, we really, really encourage you to get your intention straight and to make sure
that you are coming at it from a place of love and not from a place of ego. Yeah, the ego is
such a finicky little thing. The interesting part about conversations like this is in the past,
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the ego has this desire to return to a comfortable state. And that comfortable state
may not be serving you. And so it's important to approach this conversation, not from a place of
returning to love as in returning to a previous state, but rather to expand and to grow into
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change. And so your returning to love is not going to look like what your relationship looked like
before. Because if it did, you'd be in the same spot of disresonance. As you approach this
conversation, it really helps to know that whatever comes up, it's for your highest good,
because it is shifting you out of the place that you already are in, which is in disresonance.
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And if you stay there, it will continue to be disresonant as scary as these conversations are,
as much fear as the ego offers up. No matter what comes of this conversation, it will be for your
highest good, regardless of the outcome. This is the perfect segue into talking about the collective,
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because you were saying, having this conversation wherever you're going to end up is not where
you were, because where you were was just resonance. And I feel like that is the ultimate
where we are right now as a species. Wherever we're going, it's not where we're at right now.
Because no matter what you believe, politically, you know, emotionally, environmentally, spiritually,
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religiously, it doesn't matter, right? Any word you want to put, I think we can all agree that this
is not working, that this is not the intended state of this planet, that we are meant to be
living in harmony, in peace and in love with each other, with ourselves, with Mother Earth,
with this whole universe. And that is not where we are at right now as a greater collective.
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How do we as a collective consciously return to love? And it's interesting saying return, because
from the history that we know, I don't really think humanities ever lived in a state of love,
or an age of love, if you will, is something we're evolving to. When we say return, we mean return to
your natural state of love. Your natural state as in you, the eternal soul, that little spark of
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divinity, love, unconditional love is the fabric of this universe. It is truth, it is God-sourced
Creator, it is your natural state. How do you return to that in yourself? Because when you return to
that in yourself, we return to that as a collective. We can sit here all day and give endless examples
and ideas on how we more consciously relate and love each other. However, as we've said many times
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on the show, and we will continue to say, it all starts with the self. It all starts with loving
yourself, consciously returning to love in your internal environment. With you, with yourself,
is how you consciously return to love as a collective. Because when you do that work for
yourself, you do that healing work, you do your inner work, your shadow work, whatever you want to call
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it, and you are in a state of self-love, you automatically are in a state of love out in the
environment. We have been doing extensive inner work for quite some time now. We are obviously not
perfect. The work is never quote unquote done. However, we've reached a place of love in ourselves
and in our relationship that going out into the environment, into the world for the most part,
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we obviously are human and we have moments. We relate lovingly with everyone and everything,
even if they're not relating lovingly with us. And that's not to say it's easy, but we
consciously go out into the world. We pick up trash when we see it. We're kind to people.
We do not engage in situations that are not of love. If someone is trying to engage with us in
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a way that's not loving, we choose not to engage in that. It's really this call once again to
radically invite and call you forward. How do I fix the world? Look at this, look at that war
politics, that's all distraction. That's projection. Everything external of you is a reflection of what
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is going on internally. We don't have a war problem, a politics problem, a poverty problem.
We have a consciousness problem and the only way to consciously return to love as a species on this
planet, the only way to fix any of these problems is to fix the consciousness. And that means
starting within because the only consciousness you can fix and the only place that you can
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truly control and return to love is with yourself. And the moment that you do that,
it reverberates out like a vibration into those around you, into your relationships,
into the world. And when we do that and start living from a heart centered place as individuals,
we react differently to the world outside of us, which really is just an extension of us.
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But we do so from a place of non judgment, which is also really important, because this time of
great change as we move into a place of love also means that everything that is not of that love
needs to come out to the surface to be evaluated to have that conversation as a collective
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about things like child trafficking, about war, about famine, about how we treat our environment
and each other. All of these things cannot continue to exist when we live from a place of love.
And so they need to be addressed. We need to have these conversations. And when we are living
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from a place of love within ourselves, we can have these conversations without the emotional
charge or the blinders that can be put on that distract us and lead us out of alignment. It is
so important that we see these things, we acknowledge them, we love them, and we start to ask the
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and we start to ask the question of, okay, how can we expand? How can we move forward and not demonize
them? I want to give an example here. And I want to invite you as you're listening to this to just
take a moment to check in with yourself, because it can be really tough to look at the world we
live in. And some of these things we're naming off like war or child trafficking and not have an
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emotional reaction, right? We're humans, of course, we're going to have a reaction. Emotions are
healthy. It is healthy and reasonable and acceptable to examine these things and have emotions. We can
healthily express our disagreement and our emotions. It's when we get into a reactive state where our
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ego is taking control, we are judging, we are identifying with, we are attaching to, that's
when it gets tricky and that's when it's no longer serving our highest good. And so I would encourage
you as we talk through some of these things and we talk about collectively, consciously returning
to love, keep that at the forefront of your mind. So let's look at the example of war. I feel like
(35:19):
this one is slightly less emotionally charged than the others. It is really easy to look at the world
and look at say a war in a certain country, there are several going on right now, and immediately
say this is wrong, this is evil, the people participating in this are evil. I would invite
a higher perspective. Are they evil? Can anyone be evil? Or are they people who are highly distorted
(35:44):
in their energy, who grew up in violence, who grew up watching violence, who are dealing with their
own traumas and abuse and things that they're not working through. And after so long and so much
violence and oppression and poverty and trauma generational, that stuff passes down in our
DNA. They're now doing what feels aligned in their current energetic state. Doesn't mean that it's
(36:09):
aligned with truth and love, but to them it's aligned with their current state. And so we have
to as a collective get to a place where we can consciously love the soul, the essence of everyone
on this planet, because we're all connected. We are all one. We all come from the same God source,
creator, light, whatever you believe is out there and up there. We are all of that. And this polarity
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of good and bad and positive and negative and you know, good and evil, that is keeping us stuck
in this place. And so the work for us to consciously return to love and the world outside
is to heal and love and accept those parts of ourselves, to heal and love and accept the potential
of those parts of ourselves. You know, I really like the exercise of asking yourself,
(37:00):
what if you grew up in that country and you grew up in oppression and poverty and violence,
your parents were abusive, you didn't grow up with love and all of these things. And so you grew up
in that life. And then you were approached or you were encouraged to participate in this war.
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What choice would you make? Because it's really easy from the life you're living currently to say,
I would never participate in insert blank, we don't even just have to talk about war. I would never
do blank. That right there is a signal that there's more work to be done. The hardest part
about the consciousness journey for me, I'll turn it in word about me and be really vulnerable here,
(37:42):
has been accepting and healing and acknowledging the capacity within myself to be one of war,
to hurt someone else, to commit insert blank, because I really had to come within myself and
heal the parts of myself that I was judging in myself and then projecting out onto the world.
(38:05):
Really bringing it all back to center here. I want to really invite you to remember to reexamine,
to go deeper into what inside of myself have I not healed and love and accepted, whether it's
something that's present or it's a potential of something that could be present had your life
gone differently. Because until we radically love and accept and honor the holistic being that we are,
(38:31):
we can't look out at the world and love and accept and honor what's happening. And again,
that doesn't mean condoning it or wanting it to happen. It just means having a really deep
conscious understanding that all of this is necessary, because it all has to be purged out.
It all has to come to the light. We have to as a species kind of get all that nasty, pussy,
(38:52):
yuckiness of the infection out so that we can start to heal. And the best thing that you can do,
if you're someone who's looking at the world right now, and you're really struggling, and you are like,
my gosh, there's just all of these things going on. I don't know what to do. Love yourself.
Heal yourself. Heal your mind and save the world. It was a beautiful title of a course that we went
(39:15):
to. It really is the answer. The answer is within. It's all within you, friend. You have the power
to change the world just by healing yourself. That's all you have to do. You don't have to go out
and fight politics and wars and all of these things. You know, it's great to care about them,
and it's great to do something about them. Just don't be distracted and don't be confused and
(39:37):
don't fall into the trap that that is the problem, because the answer is within you.
It's always within us. We have the power to change this world. And the more that we put our power out
on external experiences and circumstances, in a hope to change the world by doing something
outside of ourselves, we are pushing our power away and actually feeding this victim mentality
(40:04):
that the majority of humanity is living in. It's really helpful when looking at some of these
extreme circumstances like war and trafficking and really distilling it down to a frequency,
to an energy, to a thought. Is it war or is it control? Is it fear? Think of a dictator
(40:31):
exercising their control on a country. Where did that need, that desire for control come from
in their experience? Did it come from a place of feeling unsafe in the environment that they grew up
in? And so the distortion got so big that they felt that if they could control their entire
(40:53):
environment, then they could finally be safe. Can we find that experience within ourselves
and start to heal that quote unquote dictator mentality within ourselves by relinquishing
the need to control our environment? That is what we're talking about here.
I just had the most beautiful download of an exercise come through as you were speaking right
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there, because as you were talking, I actually had a vision of dictators in this world as little
children and what environment they grew up in that caused the distortion of so much fear that
then caused the need for control or the perceived need for control to feel safe. If we could look
at every single person in the world that our egos in our minds want to demonize as evil or insert
(41:43):
blank and see their inner child, if someone is cutting you off in traffic or is treating you
not lovingly, can you look at that person and see the inner child? Can you see the little boy or the
little girl that was abused or that lived in poverty or that grew up in an environment of violence?
(42:04):
I think that's a really beautiful and practical tool to take with of if you're really struggling
looking externally and kind of getting stuck in those traps and being pulled outward and projecting
it outward, look for the inner child because we all were children, right? And children are innocent
and so if we were all innocent children, then how did those innocent children become the adult
(42:26):
that you're seeing who is undeniably not facing their trauma or maybe even aware that they have
trauma because it's become so distorted? So that's the external bringing it all into summary here.
How do we consciously return to love with ourselves in our relationships, in the things in our lives
and most importantly as a collective? As always, we radically love ourselves. We do the healing work
(42:52):
for ourselves and it's these three key words that I'm really going to drive home again.
Authenticity, purpose and truth, capital T. Living an aligned and authentic life saying yes
when it's a yes saying no when it's a no, having boundaries, cutting cords when it's necessary
(43:13):
and most importantly constantly reevaluating is this still serving my highest good? We are always
growing and changing and so doing things for commitment's sake or staying in things because
it's comfortable, that is not conscious relating and that is something that we are all kind of
navigating right now as we awaken. Purpose, who are you? Why are you here? What is your purpose
(43:39):
in the awakening of humanity and if you don't have that answer yet just knowing that the only
purpose that you're truly here to do is to remember who you are, heal yourself and choose love. If you
can do those three things you have changed the world. I'm actually getting emotional. You've
changed the world more than 99.9% of the people on this planet do. If you can choose love and
(44:05):
heal yourself and just remember who you are that you are a perfect whole and complete
spark of the divine with the divine connected to everything that is your purpose and lastly truth
capital T which on the show we're always saying is love. Unconditional love is the fabric of everything
that is I believe one of the only core truths of the universe and so if you can align yourself with
(44:30):
authenticity, purpose and truth in your own experience and then reverberate that out to your
relationships and then the collective you my friend have consciously returned to love.
Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. And I love that you without even knowing it brought it back down to the three
(44:57):
core pillars of loving consciously which is awaken, heal, love and that's really all that we are here
to do on this planet. Awaken to who we are. Remember who our authentic self is and live from that place.
(45:20):
Heal everything that we've experienced in this lifetime and past lifetimes generationally.
Shed anything that is not from love and then three return to love. Live from a place of truth
which is unconditional love like you said. I love so much that you brought that up. I didn't think
(45:43):
about that and this is such a beautiful time to talk about it because that is our motto here at
Loving Consciously. Awaken, heal, love and when I think about purpose you know authenticity we
all know what that is. Truth we all know what that is. Purpose specifically I think so many people
us included even up to yesterday what is my purpose right and purpose is different than passion
(46:05):
and purpose is different than mission right and this is all what I'm going to be talking about today.
Purpose though as like a soul on this planet that is your purpose awaken, heal and love that's all
you have to do. Remember who you are reclaim that divinity and consciousness heal all of those
parts that are not serving you that are not in alignment with pure love and light and then love
(46:30):
love yourself love the world doesn't mean you agree with it it doesn't mean you condone it looking at
everything with perfect love because it's all of the creator and it's all necessary for this evolution
and moving into this age of love. We've got to get all this bad crap out so that we know what we
don't want in our new world and so with love we both encourage invite welcome you into this revolution
(46:55):
with us to awaken, heal and love yourself so that you can consciously return to love with us
with this world with everything that is was and ever will be. We will leave you with that and a
request a call to action how do I help how do I change the world send this show send this podcast
(47:17):
to someone in your life that may be also wanting to do the work or maybe is asking some of these
questions is starting to wake up is in a place of wanting to cultivate more love in their life is
navigating something challenging share this show because sharing this and getting this out there
to as many people as possible can help move this revolution forward as always we love you we're
(47:41):
sending you so much love and we will see you here soon
We don't have, you know, a war problem, a politics problem, a poverty problem.
(00:04):
We have a consciousness problem. And the only way to consciously return to love as a species on
this planet, the only way to fix any of these problems is to fix the consciousness. And that
means starting within. Because the only consciousness you can fix, and the only place that you can
truly control and return to love is with yourself. Because until we radically love and accept and
(00:32):
honor the holistic being that we are, we can't look out at the world and love and accept and
honor what's happening. The answer is within. It's all within you, friend. You have the power
to change the world just by healing yourself. That's all you have to do. That's really all
that we are here to do. Awaken to who we are and live from that place. Heal everything that we've
(00:57):
experienced. Shed anything that is not from love. And then return to love. Live from a place of truth.
What is your purpose in the awakening of humanity? And if you don't have that answer yet,
just knowing that the only purpose that you're truly here to do is to remember who you are,
(01:17):
heal yourself, and choose love. If you can do those three things, you have changed the world.
And so with love, we both encourage, invite, welcome you into this revolution with us to awaken,
heal, and love yourself so that you can consciously return to love.
Welcome home to the Love Inconsciously podcast. My name is Ameris. And my name is Eric. And if you
(01:46):
are like us, nobody taught you how to love. We are best friends and life partners here to
vulnerably and authentically share our journey while exploring the sacred realms of love,
consciousness, relationships, spirituality, and all that they encompass. The intention of this show
is to help you consciously relate to yourself, others, and everything else in this universe.
(02:06):
Together, we can embody a more intentional and fulfilling way of giving and receiving love.
Loving consciously. Through eight years together, we have had the opportunity to overcome deep
patterning and programming, as well as trauma related to mental health, addiction, pregnancy,
loss, infidelity, and immense grief. After six years of experiencing these challenges with no
(02:29):
knowledge on how to heal or love each other, we separated. After us both spiritually awakening
and recommitting, we formed our conscious partnership and have spent the last two years
cultivating a divine union founded on unconditional love, devotion, and commitment to personal growth.
Thank you for joining us and doing the work alongside us as we explore this beautiful world
(02:50):
of love and consciousness to co-create a new world of love. As you courageously walk this path,
remember to have grace with yourself and know that you have both the capacity to love consciously
and the power to always choose love. Namaste and welcome back to the Loving Consciously podcast.
This is Consciously Returning to Love. This is episode 36 and I could not think of a title
(03:18):
that could better describe the last few weeks of our life and our experience,
as well as what is happening in the collective right now. So we're going to get really deep into
what is Consciously Returning to Love? How do you as an individual, you and your relationships,
and us as a collective humanity on this planet, consciously return to the state of love? Which
(03:40):
we know of course is our natural state and is the age of consciousness that we are moving into.
It has been three weeks since we've been here solo together talking about a teaching topic,
because three weeks ago we had our anniversary episode, which is kind of like a special celebration
episode, and then two weeks ago we had the launch of our new series Loving Conversations.
(04:04):
This one was with Rachel and Ryan, where we bring on other conscious individuals to talk about how
that is working in their relationship, whatever format that is. And then last week we took a break.
And as we've said on here before, we don't love taking weeks off. We really reserve them these
days for when they're needed. And there is absolutely no way that either one of us had the energy in
(04:28):
our cup or in our capacity to record an episode last week. And so as always, it's that delicate
balance between commitment and honoring your energetic bandwidth. Last week was a really
intense energetic week. We're moving every day, every two days max, and we were just absolutely
exhausted. And so we opted to skip a week. We're back today. We have so many updates.
(04:50):
The last time that we gave you personal updates was three weeks ago, and we were in Sioux Falls,
South Dakota, and we had just made the decision to get back on the road and do the right half of
the country. Well, in the last three weeks, we have seen 12 states, two national parks,
and our second Canada province, which was going to Toronto. It has been a wild three weeks. We
(05:15):
had some really big car troubles along the way. And in that, we had a really beautiful experience
of divine protection and guidance where we really had this theme this last few weeks in
consciously returning to love of bringing God's Source Creator back to the center of our lives,
of our relationship. And so that was a beautiful opportunity to lean on that divinity, that divine
(05:41):
connection to Source in navigating that. We've had some really difficult decisions that we've had the
opportunity to make in returning to love, authenticity, purpose, and truth. That's really been this theme
around consciously returning to love. And that has included decisions around relationships in our
lives and, you know, things that we were holding and keeping as a commitment for commitment's sake.
(06:06):
And, you know, we have a beautiful episode on devotion and commitment. If you want to go back
and listen to that, but it's really called us forward to look at where we are potentially
out of alignment and not even from malice, just from those subtle ways in which we fall out of
alignment. We fall out of love. We fall out of truth. Last big theme here is we have really
(06:27):
deeply been reexamining our boundaries and our romantic relationship. You know, this partnership
is multifaceted. There are many, many hats that we wear together, just one of them being our
romantic partnership. And we've spent the last two weeks having some really tough conversations
around what that looks like, what's serving us, what's not serving us, and if we wanted to continue
(06:50):
that portion of our relationship. So as you can see, it has been a wild three weeks, as always,
with these two crazy people who change their entire life environment and home every one to four days.
We are coming to you live today from, I actually had to think about this for a second, Albany,
New York. We just came from Niagara Falls. That's where we were kind of stuck an extra couple of
(07:16):
days for car repairs. And yesterday we drove across the entire state of New York to make it over here
to Albany. We are on our way to Maine, and then we'll start heading south. So it's happening so fast.
We did all of the Midwest. We're now in the Northeast. It's beautiful. It's starting to be fall.
There's no better place to be in fall than the Northeast. So we're so excited. Moving into today's
(07:39):
topic, consciously returning to love. We're going to take this from a personal angle, and then we're
going to take this from a collective angle. We really think there's a benefit in vulnerably and
authentically sharing our experience through our lives. And then we're going to switch into looking
at what the heck is happening in the world right now and how do we consciously return to love as
(08:02):
a species as one big soul family. Personally, we're going to look at this from three angles as
individuals in our relationship and in this podcast. And I actually want to start with this podcast
because this is where we are. And this podcast is deeply important to both of us. Eric's over here
nodding along. And we had some tough decisions to make this last few weeks. As we have been looking
(08:28):
at authenticity specifically, you know, I mentioned these three words earlier, authenticity, purpose,
and truth. I'm actually doing an Instagram live on these three words later today. As we started
looking at these, one of the things that came up for examination was this podcast. In examining this
podcast and where we were headed, we kind of came to the difficult and necessary truth that we were
(08:51):
starting to, we hadn't actually pulled the trigger yet, but we were starting to move into the space
of interviewing people who were big in the space just because they were big in the space or interviewing
people that you just kind of interviewed because those are the people in the spiritual space that
people interview or people who asked to be on the podcast. And maybe we felt obligated.
(09:12):
And it was really difficult because we had to reach out to some people and say, hey,
there's absolutely no reason other than it just doesn't feel an alignment for us. You know,
if it's not a 100%, yes, it's a no. In having those conversations, we came to a deepening again and a
profound commitment and realization that we are not willing to have anyone on this show that is not
(09:39):
in complete and total alignment with our mission of love and of consciousness and of truth. And,
you know, up until this point, all of our guests have really been embodying that in their work,
in their lives, and we've realized that resonance and that mission must be in alignment. And we
(10:00):
can't just have people on the show for exposure's sake or for, you know, the other things that we
mentioned. And so it was this really deep self honesty and honesty between each other of what are
we creating here and why? And is it about numbers or is it about impacting the lives of the people
who are listening authentically? And so I'm really proud of us for reaching that place and making
(10:24):
those tough decisions. It isn't easy to say no to people. And it's really calling us forward as
leaders of this show to make those tough decisions around what is aligned and not even just what
is aligned because one of these people, for example, was aligned. It just wasn't what we wanted to be
talking about. It was a very interesting experience for us to have people who were aligned and doing
(10:52):
good work and it not fully resonating with this show. And it was an experience of practicing
boundaries and really honing in and focusing on what is the calling of the show? What is the message
and ensuring that everything is in alignment with that. And in this practice, it extended out into
(11:15):
our individual lives too of understanding where are we not in alignment with our true purpose
and our mission and in love in our own lives. And it's so interesting how we can subtly start to
leak energy as we, at least for myself, go back into kind of those people pleasing
(11:40):
program elements that most of this society has grown up with and wanting to cater to everybody
and wanting to have a really open and inclusive space where we can give everybody a voice
and then balancing and recognizing that if we do that, the message gets diluted. The true
(12:02):
authentic compass of what this podcast is becomes muddied with everybody else's energy.
I think that was a really great segue into talking about us as individuals. You briefly
touched on it there because that has been a huge part of the last few weeks, especially I'll talk
about mine if you want to share about yours. That's why I'm doing this live later today. For me,
(12:26):
it has been a really big journey of realizing that I had very subtly and very slowly fallen out of
alignment in purpose and authenticity and truth, specifically like you said, in relationships and
in things in my life, things that I was doing or leading or committed to or participating in,
(12:47):
relationships that I knew somewhere deep down were no longer in alignment. And the theme that I
noticed around all of these things, a podcast individually and what we're about to talk about
in our relationship was the kind of avoidance of the uncomfortable. And it's not even conflict,
it's the avoidance of consciously sharing that and of consciously saying, hey, this interviewer
(13:09):
doesn't feel in alignment or hey, this relationship is no longer resonating with me. For me, that is,
I think even harder than the unconscious version, which is like avoiding conflict, right? It has
been really challenging for me to step into and navigate how to lovingly and consciously say no
and end something and put those boundaries up. You know, I don't want to do that interview. I feel
(13:33):
obligated because you reached out or this relationship is no longer resonating because I don't
stand for the values that this person may be holding in their container in their life. And so,
yeah, it's just been really interesting as individuals navigating that. That's been my
experience is that like uncomfortable feeling when, you know, I have to share that truth and
(13:55):
speaking truth and speaking it authentically when you know, it's maybe not what the other person
wants to hear. And I feel like that's really the embodiment of authenticity. It's really asking
yourself, are you living in alignment with truth and purpose and love and being authentic, even
when it's not easy, when it's uncomfortable. And again, this isn't even always conscious for us,
(14:19):
which we're going to move now after you share yours into talking about our relationship. This
happened very, very subtly, a little, little inch here and there. And then we woke up a
month later and they're like, Whoa, wait a minute, this is not an alignment. How did we get here?
And that's what we mean when we say, you know, patterning and ego and all these things can
(14:41):
be really sneaky, right? It happens very subtly. And so it's just been this really abrupt, okay,
wait a minute, time to come back to center, reevaluate our life, our boundaries, our commitments,
all of the things, our relationship, our purpose in this individuals, and make sure that everything's
in alignment and make a lot of really challenging, but necessary and beautiful loving conscious
(15:05):
decisions to cut the cords where they need to be cut. And it's so important to have these check-ins
with yourself and with those who you're relating with, because it really is so subtle, the journey
into getting to this place where we're leaking our energy, where we're saying yes, when it's not 100%
yes. What's really important is learning how to say no, and learning how to set those boundaries,
(15:34):
and to be able to admit to yourself from an authentic place, what is a yes and what is a no.
And doing all that from a place of love, because the way it showed up in my experience in the past
is by shutting down and not responding or pulling my energy away in a very quiet manner,
(15:55):
and just kind of not dealing with these things. And then utilizing circumstances in my outside
environment to create a victim narrative that allows me to sit in that place and not do anything
about it. And so my work to do is to shed those narratives, step into my voice, and set those
(16:17):
boundaries in an effort to truly align myself with my purpose, and recognizing the limited bandwidth
that I currently have, and where that energy is needed most in my life. Moving into our third
point here, our relationship on this kind of personal section. As I shared in the intro,
(16:42):
it has been a really deep and vulnerable and uncomfortable journey around talking about
our romantic relationship. In many lights, you know, where is it serving us? Where is it not
serving us? Is that part of our relationship still in alignment for both of our highest good,
(17:05):
and for both of our individual purposes? Because when you've been with someone as long as we have,
the lines of individuality naturally so get blurry. And if you're in any type of long-term
partnership, and I would say, you know, when you start getting into multiples of years, you know,
one, two, three, four years, and especially after, you know, five, six, seven, you really start to become
(17:27):
one. And that's beautiful, right? The work and the challenges in remembering that you're individuals.
And for me, it was very much a journey of, you are my best friend, you are my co-host of this show,
you know, we are business partners, we are travel buddies, we are so many things, co-puppy parents.
Romanticism or the romantic relationship is one of, you know, a dozen or more pillars that we share.
(17:52):
And so it was really looking at and asking what was reflected back to us as, you know, pretty rare
and something I've definitely never had in our relationship before, asking the really tough
question of, is that pillar still in alignment? And can or should we move into those other pillars
and sunset that pillar? It's really interesting because in having such a vulnerable conversation,
(18:18):
and it's a continued conversation, it has opened the door for more intimacy and more closeness
and more affection and more tenderness. It's like the crux of the human condition, right? Just by
being willing to have that conversation and say, hey, is the romantic portion of our relationship
(18:39):
still where we want to be going? The romantic portion of our relationship grew. And so, you know,
that's what we've been doing, especially this last week since we took the break is really shutting
it down. We really closed out the outside distractions, came within to us and this romantic
partnership and made very intentional and conscious decisions to cultivate that connection and give
(19:04):
that part of our relationship some more space, some more love. And before that conversation,
you know, we were experiencing a really challenging time in this partnership centered around the
romantic pillar in that it really wasn't at the forefront of this partnership. All of the other
(19:25):
hats were really taking the energetic bandwidth. And for me, I can say that my energy wasn't
directly going into cultivating a romantic container. And after all that time of it not
being addressed and being at the forefront, this sort of shadow in our experience became active.
(19:48):
And my unconsciousness started reacting to things that were present in the in the partnership.
And there was actually quite a bit of like masculine and feminine conflict dynamics that
showed up for us. And it wasn't until we sat down and had this conversation and brought these
(20:11):
things to the light that we were able to create a space of vulnerability and start to move through
it. For me, it was so powerful to have this conversation with you with the deep trust and
knowing that just because we're talking about our romantic partnership and the potential of
sunsetting that or shifting into a new style of relating with one another didn't mean that we
(20:39):
as a unit, as friends, as so many other things, would just be disbanded and discarded.
Yeah, and for me, you know, it was almost like by just giving and allowing me the space to even
ponder that question, which historically up to this point would have never happened. This is
definitely one of our deepest rooted unhealthy attachment styles. Just giving me that space to
(21:06):
say, Hey, I'd like to ponder this question and have this conversation and you being like, okay,
this is uncomfortable. I don't want to do this, but I'm willing to move to that uncomfortability.
What's coming up for you, I think is what you said, where are you being called? What are you
feeling you need or what are you feeling is in need of attention? And I remember the moment you
(21:26):
asked me that question and just being like, Oh, literally just like, not holding me down and
being like, no, wait, we have to be together romantically as it may have been in the past.
It was immediately like, Oh, okay, cool. Yeah, like I want to have this conversation. I want to
work through this. I'm actually wanting more time and energy and attention on the romantic pillar.
(21:48):
I don't want it to end. I just don't want it to be this way. Right. And I think that is a beautiful
segue into moving into this collective piece and what consciously returning to love is. It's not
even so much wanting something to end, right, giving our energy to like ending something. It's
putting our energy on how do we grow love because the kind of like secret here on returning to love
(22:14):
is we never really actually left love. It's a consciousness thing. And so it's bringing our
consciousness back into the reality, the frequency, the vibration of love. And I think we've done that
and I think we've done that really beautifully this last week. It's been really, really vulnerable
and really uncomfortable. Those are the only two words I could possibly use. And so if you're
(22:39):
in any type of relationship where maybe you want to have that conversation,
doesn't even have to be romantic, but some pillar of some relationship you are in,
it could be a friend, a coworker, your child is feeling out of alignment. We would really encourage
you to have that difficult conversation because by being vulnerable and saying, hey, something's not
(23:02):
feeling like full love here and how do we work together to return to that love? You can open
the door for so much more vulnerability and connection and authenticity. And that of course
is what we're moving towards here. That's what we want to cultivate as we consciously return to love.
The most important part of a conversation like this is the two pillars of love and authenticity.
(23:29):
If we approach this conversation from a place of achieving a desired outcome,
which I'm speaking to from experience, that laces the conversation with inauthentic energy,
because the whole basis of a check in like this is to be completely open to what is in store.
(23:53):
And that might look like a relationship changing its form. The real work is saving space for that
reality and supporting one another in that transition, whatever that may look like.
If that's not the case, then it's supporting each other in returning to the romantic side of things.
(24:16):
You touched on something so important there that we talked about way back in the beginning of the
show. I believe it was new ways of loving, which is like one of our first 10 episodes,
where we talked about returning to love does not mean returning to relationship. And this is
something that I'm navigating in a lot of my familial relationships at this time, is helping
(24:39):
people readjust their definition of love, because we live in a world where it's like, love is always
being with this person. Love is never giving up on your vow of marriage. Conscious love,
conscious relating is much higher than that. One of our closest and dearest friends right now is
navigating, ending a four and a half year conscious partnership marriage, and they are doing it
(25:06):
consciously with love. And it's beautiful and obviously painful to witness because they know,
as we are saying here, and as you touched on, returning to love doesn't always mean that you
return to whatever the relationship looked like before. And so I love so much that you called
that out. It's going to be really important in this next section we're moving into on the collective,
(25:30):
because we obviously to consciously return to love first have to even heal and define what love is
and what our relationship to love is. And I think we've talked a lot about that on the show, we'll
obviously keep talking about it, because no one taught us how to love. And there are very, very
unhealthy, egoic based beliefs and ideas and attachments around what love quote unquote is
(25:55):
or looks like love doesn't always feel good, right? If you love your child, and they want to do something
that is unsafe to their life, like their being, and you say no, and they don't feel good, right?
They're really upset, they think you're mean, there's quote unquote conflict, and they, you know,
storm away. Did you do that because you loved them? Well, of course you love them and loving them is
(26:17):
keeping them safe from doing this, you know, unsafe thing. And so I use that example to
show love does not always look like the, you know, unicorny rainbow thing. It's very complex. Love is
much more than that. And so consciously returning to love really requires us to check our egos and
(26:37):
know why are we having this conversation? What is our intention here? And I'm so proud of you
this time for me bringing this conversation to the table and saying, Hey, I'm feeling like the
romantic pillar of our relationship is not an alignment at this time with what I would like
from a romantic relationship. How can we work together to have a conversation around this?
(27:00):
And you coming at that the way that you did and saying, Okay, the intention here is to return to
love, whatever that looks like, not my ego is attached to the outcome of keeping this romantic
partnership. And so I'm coming at this for misaligned energy. And that right there is our
biggest piece of advice. Again, if you are navigating a relationship, any type, and you are
(27:22):
having a need or a desire to have any of these conversations around alignment and truth and
returning to love, we really, really encourage you to get your intention straight and to make sure
that you are coming at it from a place of love and not from a place of ego. Yeah, the ego is
such a finicky little thing. The interesting part about conversations like this is in the past,
(27:50):
the ego has this desire to return to a comfortable state. And that comfortable state
may not be serving you. And so it's important to approach this conversation, not from a place of
returning to love as in returning to a previous state, but rather to expand and to grow into
(28:13):
change. And so your returning to love is not going to look like what your relationship looked like
before. Because if it did, you'd be in the same spot of disresonance. As you approach this
conversation, it really helps to know that whatever comes up, it's for your highest good,
because it is shifting you out of the place that you already are in, which is in disresonance.
(28:39):
And if you stay there, it will continue to be disresonant as scary as these conversations are,
as much fear as the ego offers up. No matter what comes of this conversation, it will be for your
highest good, regardless of the outcome. This is the perfect segue into talking about the collective,
(29:00):
because you were saying, having this conversation wherever you're going to end up is not where
you were, because where you were was just resonance. And I feel like that is the ultimate
where we are right now as a species. Wherever we're going, it's not where we're at right now.
Because no matter what you believe, politically, you know, emotionally, environmentally, spiritually,
(29:23):
religiously, it doesn't matter, right? Any word you want to put, I think we can all agree that this
is not working, that this is not the intended state of this planet, that we are meant to be
living in harmony, in peace and in love with each other, with ourselves, with Mother Earth,
with this whole universe. And that is not where we are at right now as a greater collective.
(29:48):
How do we as a collective consciously return to love? And it's interesting saying return, because
from the history that we know, I don't really think humanities ever lived in a state of love,
or an age of love, if you will, is something we're evolving to. When we say return, we mean return to
your natural state of love. Your natural state as in you, the eternal soul, that little spark of
(30:13):
divinity, love, unconditional love is the fabric of this universe. It is truth, it is God-sourced
Creator, it is your natural state. How do you return to that in yourself? Because when you return to
that in yourself, we return to that as a collective. We can sit here all day and give endless examples
and ideas on how we more consciously relate and love each other. However, as we've said many times
(30:41):
on the show, and we will continue to say, it all starts with the self. It all starts with loving
yourself, consciously returning to love in your internal environment. With you, with yourself,
is how you consciously return to love as a collective. Because when you do that work for
yourself, you do that healing work, you do your inner work, your shadow work, whatever you want to call
(31:01):
it, and you are in a state of self-love, you automatically are in a state of love out in the
environment. We have been doing extensive inner work for quite some time now. We are obviously not
perfect. The work is never quote unquote done. However, we've reached a place of love in ourselves
and in our relationship that going out into the environment, into the world for the most part,
(31:26):
we obviously are human and we have moments. We relate lovingly with everyone and everything,
even if they're not relating lovingly with us. And that's not to say it's easy, but we
consciously go out into the world. We pick up trash when we see it. We're kind to people.
We do not engage in situations that are not of love. If someone is trying to engage with us in
(31:48):
a way that's not loving, we choose not to engage in that. It's really this call once again to
radically invite and call you forward. How do I fix the world? Look at this, look at that war
politics, that's all distraction. That's projection. Everything external of you is a reflection of what
(32:08):
is going on internally. We don't have a war problem, a politics problem, a poverty problem.
We have a consciousness problem and the only way to consciously return to love as a species on this
planet, the only way to fix any of these problems is to fix the consciousness. And that means
starting within because the only consciousness you can fix and the only place that you can
(32:33):
truly control and return to love is with yourself. And the moment that you do that,
it reverberates out like a vibration into those around you, into your relationships,
into the world. And when we do that and start living from a heart centered place as individuals,
we react differently to the world outside of us, which really is just an extension of us.
(33:00):
But we do so from a place of non judgment, which is also really important, because this time of
great change as we move into a place of love also means that everything that is not of that love
needs to come out to the surface to be evaluated to have that conversation as a collective
(33:21):
about things like child trafficking, about war, about famine, about how we treat our environment
and each other. All of these things cannot continue to exist when we live from a place of love.
And so they need to be addressed. We need to have these conversations. And when we are living
(33:44):
from a place of love within ourselves, we can have these conversations without the emotional
charge or the blinders that can be put on that distract us and lead us out of alignment. It is
so important that we see these things, we acknowledge them, we love them, and we start to ask the
(34:08):
and we start to ask the question of, okay, how can we expand? How can we move forward and not demonize
them? I want to give an example here. And I want to invite you as you're listening to this to just
take a moment to check in with yourself, because it can be really tough to look at the world we
live in. And some of these things we're naming off like war or child trafficking and not have an
(34:35):
emotional reaction, right? We're humans, of course, we're going to have a reaction. Emotions are
healthy. It is healthy and reasonable and acceptable to examine these things and have emotions. We can
healthily express our disagreement and our emotions. It's when we get into a reactive state where our
(34:56):
ego is taking control, we are judging, we are identifying with, we are attaching to, that's
when it gets tricky and that's when it's no longer serving our highest good. And so I would encourage
you as we talk through some of these things and we talk about collectively, consciously returning
to love, keep that at the forefront of your mind. So let's look at the example of war. I feel like
(35:19):
this one is slightly less emotionally charged than the others. It is really easy to look at the world
and look at say a war in a certain country, there are several going on right now, and immediately
say this is wrong, this is evil, the people participating in this are evil. I would invite
a higher perspective. Are they evil? Can anyone be evil? Or are they people who are highly distorted
(35:44):
in their energy, who grew up in violence, who grew up watching violence, who are dealing with their
own traumas and abuse and things that they're not working through. And after so long and so much
violence and oppression and poverty and trauma generational, that stuff passes down in our
DNA. They're now doing what feels aligned in their current energetic state. Doesn't mean that it's
(36:09):
aligned with truth and love, but to them it's aligned with their current state. And so we have
to as a collective get to a place where we can consciously love the soul, the essence of everyone
on this planet, because we're all connected. We are all one. We all come from the same God source,
creator, light, whatever you believe is out there and up there. We are all of that. And this polarity
(36:36):
of good and bad and positive and negative and you know, good and evil, that is keeping us stuck
in this place. And so the work for us to consciously return to love and the world outside
is to heal and love and accept those parts of ourselves, to heal and love and accept the potential
of those parts of ourselves. You know, I really like the exercise of asking yourself,
(37:00):
what if you grew up in that country and you grew up in oppression and poverty and violence,
your parents were abusive, you didn't grow up with love and all of these things. And so you grew up
in that life. And then you were approached or you were encouraged to participate in this war.
(37:21):
What choice would you make? Because it's really easy from the life you're living currently to say,
I would never participate in insert blank, we don't even just have to talk about war. I would never
do blank. That right there is a signal that there's more work to be done. The hardest part
about the consciousness journey for me, I'll turn it in word about me and be really vulnerable here,
(37:42):
has been accepting and healing and acknowledging the capacity within myself to be one of war,
to hurt someone else, to commit insert blank, because I really had to come within myself and
heal the parts of myself that I was judging in myself and then projecting out onto the world.
(38:05):
Really bringing it all back to center here. I want to really invite you to remember to reexamine,
to go deeper into what inside of myself have I not healed and love and accepted, whether it's
something that's present or it's a potential of something that could be present had your life
gone differently. Because until we radically love and accept and honor the holistic being that we are,
(38:31):
we can't look out at the world and love and accept and honor what's happening. And again,
that doesn't mean condoning it or wanting it to happen. It just means having a really deep
conscious understanding that all of this is necessary, because it all has to be purged out.
It all has to come to the light. We have to as a species kind of get all that nasty, pussy,
(38:52):
yuckiness of the infection out so that we can start to heal. And the best thing that you can do,
if you're someone who's looking at the world right now, and you're really struggling, and you are like,
my gosh, there's just all of these things going on. I don't know what to do. Love yourself.
Heal yourself. Heal your mind and save the world. It was a beautiful title of a course that we went
(39:15):
to. It really is the answer. The answer is within. It's all within you, friend. You have the power
to change the world just by healing yourself. That's all you have to do. You don't have to go out
and fight politics and wars and all of these things. You know, it's great to care about them,
and it's great to do something about them. Just don't be distracted and don't be confused and
(39:37):
don't fall into the trap that that is the problem, because the answer is within you.
It's always within us. We have the power to change this world. And the more that we put our power out
on external experiences and circumstances, in a hope to change the world by doing something
outside of ourselves, we are pushing our power away and actually feeding this victim mentality
(40:04):
that the majority of humanity is living in. It's really helpful when looking at some of these
extreme circumstances like war and trafficking and really distilling it down to a frequency,
to an energy, to a thought. Is it war or is it control? Is it fear? Think of a dictator
(40:31):
exercising their control on a country. Where did that need, that desire for control come from
in their experience? Did it come from a place of feeling unsafe in the environment that they grew up
in? And so the distortion got so big that they felt that if they could control their entire
(40:53):
environment, then they could finally be safe. Can we find that experience within ourselves
and start to heal that quote unquote dictator mentality within ourselves by relinquishing
the need to control our environment? That is what we're talking about here.
I just had the most beautiful download of an exercise come through as you were speaking right
(41:17):
there, because as you were talking, I actually had a vision of dictators in this world as little
children and what environment they grew up in that caused the distortion of so much fear that
then caused the need for control or the perceived need for control to feel safe. If we could look
at every single person in the world that our egos in our minds want to demonize as evil or insert
(41:43):
blank and see their inner child, if someone is cutting you off in traffic or is treating you
not lovingly, can you look at that person and see the inner child? Can you see the little boy or the
little girl that was abused or that lived in poverty or that grew up in an environment of violence?
(42:04):
I think that's a really beautiful and practical tool to take with of if you're really struggling
looking externally and kind of getting stuck in those traps and being pulled outward and projecting
it outward, look for the inner child because we all were children, right? And children are innocent
and so if we were all innocent children, then how did those innocent children become the adult
(42:26):
that you're seeing who is undeniably not facing their trauma or maybe even aware that they have
trauma because it's become so distorted? So that's the external bringing it all into summary here.
How do we consciously return to love with ourselves in our relationships, in the things in our lives
and most importantly as a collective? As always, we radically love ourselves. We do the healing work
(42:52):
for ourselves and it's these three key words that I'm really going to drive home again.
Authenticity, purpose and truth, capital T. Living an aligned and authentic life saying yes
when it's a yes saying no when it's a no, having boundaries, cutting cords when it's necessary
(43:13):
and most importantly constantly reevaluating is this still serving my highest good? We are always
growing and changing and so doing things for commitment's sake or staying in things because
it's comfortable, that is not conscious relating and that is something that we are all kind of
navigating right now as we awaken. Purpose, who are you? Why are you here? What is your purpose
(43:39):
in the awakening of humanity and if you don't have that answer yet just knowing that the only
purpose that you're truly here to do is to remember who you are, heal yourself and choose love. If you
can do those three things you have changed the world. I'm actually getting emotional. You've
changed the world more than 99.9% of the people on this planet do. If you can choose love and
(44:05):
heal yourself and just remember who you are that you are a perfect whole and complete
spark of the divine with the divine connected to everything that is your purpose and lastly truth
capital T which on the show we're always saying is love. Unconditional love is the fabric of everything
that is I believe one of the only core truths of the universe and so if you can align yourself with
(44:30):
authenticity, purpose and truth in your own experience and then reverberate that out to your
relationships and then the collective you my friend have consciously returned to love.
Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. And I love that you without even knowing it brought it back down to the three
(44:57):
core pillars of loving consciously which is awaken, heal, love and that's really all that we are here
to do on this planet. Awaken to who we are. Remember who our authentic self is and live from that place.
(45:20):
Heal everything that we've experienced in this lifetime and past lifetimes generationally.
Shed anything that is not from love and then three return to love. Live from a place of truth
which is unconditional love like you said. I love so much that you brought that up. I didn't think
(45:43):
about that and this is such a beautiful time to talk about it because that is our motto here at
Loving Consciously. Awaken, heal, love and when I think about purpose you know authenticity we
all know what that is. Truth we all know what that is. Purpose specifically I think so many people
us included even up to yesterday what is my purpose right and purpose is different than passion
(46:05):
and purpose is different than mission right and this is all what I'm going to be talking about today.
Purpose though as like a soul on this planet that is your purpose awaken, heal and love that's all
you have to do. Remember who you are reclaim that divinity and consciousness heal all of those
parts that are not serving you that are not in alignment with pure love and light and then love
(46:30):
love yourself love the world doesn't mean you agree with it it doesn't mean you condone it looking at
everything with perfect love because it's all of the creator and it's all necessary for this evolution
and moving into this age of love. We've got to get all this bad crap out so that we know what we
don't want in our new world and so with love we both encourage invite welcome you into this revolution
(46:55):
with us to awaken, heal and love yourself so that you can consciously return to love with us
with this world with everything that is was and ever will be. We will leave you with that and a
request a call to action how do I help how do I change the world send this show send this podcast
(47:17):
to someone in your life that may be also wanting to do the work or maybe is asking some of these
questions is starting to wake up is in a place of wanting to cultivate more love in their life is
navigating something challenging share this show because sharing this and getting this out there
to as many people as possible can help move this revolution forward as always we love you we're
(47:41):
sending you so much love and we will see you here soon
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