October 17, 2023 • 47 mins
Getting a new business off the ground is a big task, as is adjusting to having a brand new baby at home. In today's episode, 3 entrepreneurs share their perspectives and guidance on getting a new business off the ground while adjusting to being a new parent.
In this episode you will hear from:
-Kimone Napier (she/her) who built her recruiting business while on maternity leave.
-Michelle Ward (she/her) who guides entreprenewbies on launching and growing their dream businesses and who also experienced running a business with a baby at home.
-Kirsty Fanton (she/her) who grew her copywriting and launch strategy business with a new baby at home and is expecting her second as we speak!
Connect w/ Kimone:
Website: https://hirebreakthrough.com
Podcast: https://hirebreakthrough.com/podcast/
Connect w/ Michelle:
Website: https://ohhellobusiness.com
Connect w/ Kirsty:
Website: https://www.kirstyfanton.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Brooke Monaghan (00:10):
Hello everybody , welcome back to another
episode of Make your BusinessWork For you.
I probably sound a little bitdifferent today because I am
coming off of being so sick.
It's just like one thing afteranother over here.
But here we are.
I'm actually feeling okay, butI'm feeling foggy and sound very
different.
Today's episode is a Q&A episode, and this is going to be the
(00:30):
first Q&A episode that you'rehearing that is of this specific
nature, so I just want to giveyou a little bit of an intro
into what you are about to hear.
This Q&A session is in responseto a very specific question.
The person who asked thisquestion gave a lot of context
about their identity and abouttheir specific situation.
(00:53):
They used the term mom.
They called themselves a newmom.
They gave a lot of contextabout the specific situation
that themselves and theirpartner are finding themselves
in.
I say all of this because thisis not a Q&A where we are
providing guidance to everybody.
This is guidance that's beingprovided to this person who
(01:15):
asked the question.
If you've never been in a groupcoaching program or something
like that before, you may nothave experienced this before,
but something that's so powerfulis hearing people ask their
questions, hearing the guidancethat's being given to that
specific person and being ableto sit and watch that and then
filter, through your ownexperience and your own lens,
(01:35):
that guidance that's being givenand taking your own takeaways
from it.
I say all of this because, inorder for that to be helpful for
you, you do need to know, goingin, that it is on you to hear
this and pull out the thingsthat work for you and the things
that resonate for you and arefor you, and leave the things
that are not, and understandthat this is not meant to be
(01:56):
guidance for everybody.
With that being said, if you donot want to hear an episode
that is full of language aboutbeing a mom specifically, or
about mothering specifically,this might not be an episode for
you.
I personally think that theguidance that's given in this
episode could be applicable toall parents, but, again, I also
(02:18):
know that hearing language likethat that is gendered usually
usually when people talk aboutbeing a mother oftentimes that
is gendered not always.
It can bring some of that up.
I'm just saying this because Iwant you to take care of
yourself and choose for yourselfif this is going to be helpful
for you or not.
You're going to hear from threedifferent people today.
(02:40):
I pulled in three differentpeople to provide their thoughts
on this question because it wasa big question.
There's a lot in it.
Also because I don't think thatthis is something that there's
just one answer to, and I alsothink that it was helpful to
hear different people'sperspectives.
The first person you're going tohear from is a friend of mine,
Kimone Napier.
Kimone uses she and herpronouns.
(03:01):
The reason I pulled Camone inis because she started her
business while she was onmaternity leave.
You're going to hear why thisis relevant to this question
once we dive into the Q&A.
Camone's specialty is actuallyin hiring and HR.
You're going to hear more fromCamone in future episodes about
team building and hiring, buttoday you are going to hear
specifically about her guidanceand thoughts on building a
(03:22):
business with a brand new babyat home.
Then you're going to hear fromMichelle Ward also uses she and
her pronouns.
Michelle is somebody who helpsentrepre-newbies as she calls
them bring their dreambusinesses to life.
She has some really greatperspective on this early, early
phase of business that thislistener is in.
Then you are going to hear fromKirsty Fanton also uses she and
(03:45):
her pronouns.
Now you're hearing why I'msaying Just know what you're
going into and the perspectivethat you're going to hear.
It is very much leaning in onedirection here, right, but
that's for a reason.
Kirsty is my go-to source onall things copywriting and
launch strategy, but she alsohappens to have a baby at home
(04:09):
and is expecting another one.
I wanted to have her weigh inas well.
Now you can always head to theshow notes to find links on how
you can connect with anybodywho's answering questions on
these episodes.
You can go to joinfruition.
com for the extended show notesand the transcripts.
You can also go to to submitquestions for future episodes.
(04:32):
I hope you find this episodehelpful.
If this is not an episode foryou today, I hope that you
listen to yourself and you goahead and skip past this one.
(04:53):
All right, here is the questionthat we got that made me want to
reach out to you specifically.
I'm a new mom with asix-month-old.
I was just starting to build myart career when we decided to
get pregnant and now I don'tknow how to balance the demands
of brand-new motherhood with mypassion for my craft and the
financial needs of my family.
I didn't have enough builtbefore the baby, so I don't have
(05:15):
much of a foundation to workwith.
It takes time to build abusiness, but we have to buy a
house.
We've outgrown our currentplace and it goes without saying
the prohibitive cost of childcare.
How do new moms who are alsobrand-new business owners
balance all of their familyneeds?
Time with the baby, financialgoals, personal passions.
Is it possible to start fromscratch during a new baby season
(05:36):
, or do I have to compromise mydesire to build the life that I
want, at least for a season, infavor of the life that my family
needs?
I expect that you're going tohave a one-sentence answer that
is just going to perfectly giveall of the answers that everyone
needs to know.
I'm just kidding, no pressure.
Kimone Napier (05:54):
Well, I wish, but what I will say with that
answer, if I was going to say itin a sentence you're going to
have to pace yourself with allof what you want to do.
I heard a couple of things.
You started this business,there's financial concerns,
you're trying to buy a house.
There's a lot of stuff to tryto manage all at one time.
(06:16):
You're going to have to paceyourself one step at a time.
For me personally, my pregnancywas my green light into
entrepreneurship.
I started my business when Iwas pregnant.
It was literally I was pregnantand I was just like well, this
is green light intoentrepreneurship because with my
(06:36):
working lifestyle, I live inNew York, I worked for the
government, I'm getting home atseven o'clock.
A baby did not fit into thepicture of a traditional work
environment, at least the way Iwas working at that time.
This was my green light intoentrepreneurship.
What I did specifically is thatI started to do a lot of
(06:58):
research and I started to buildwhile I was pregnant.
I even started to get my firstcouple of clients, because the
first ones usually come fromyour network, people who know
you so I could get someexperience.
When my daughter was born, Ibuilt my first website by myself
(07:19):
.
I did all of that stuff.
In terms of figuring out how towork when you have a child.
I would literally work around mydaughter's sleep schedule.
Literally, when they're small,when they're babies, all they
really do is eat and sleep.
Really for the first three tofour months they don't really do
(07:41):
much.
Of course you're going to playwith them and stuff like that.
I used to work around that.
She would literally be next tomy desk.
I'd have her in her bouncer orher swing or something, occupy
her time.
I'd take breaks.
On my breaks we'd either go outfor a walk or something and
things like that.
I'd find a way to work aroundit.
Then, when I started to reallybook more clients, and get more
(08:05):
busy, I would schedule the callsaround her sleep cycle because
eventually your child you'regoing to notice okay, they
always sleep at this particulartime.
You'll schedule your callsaround that.
It made it quite easy for me atthat time.
In terms of your question aboutokay, you've outgrown your space
(08:26):
, you want to buy a new house,you're going to have to pace
yourself with that I don't thinkit's necessarily the most
realistic thing to like.
You're like okay, I'm trying tobuild a business, mom, and buy
a house.
That's a lot.
Buying a house is not like yougo out and buy a house tomorrow.
It's a process.
(08:48):
What I would say is figure outwhat it is that you can do, how
you can work around your child'sschedule.
Try to start getting a coupleclients, start to set money
aside so you can buy the house.
Maybe it's like you're lookingat your financials.
You can put a timeline on it.
Maybe it's like six months,maybe it's a year, just depends
(09:10):
on how much money you'rebringing in and the whole nine
yards.
But you have to create a plan.
This is going to take planning,because what you don't want to
do is stress yourself out.
If you're stressed, your babyis going to also be stressed.
That's the way that you canwork around that.
Then you need to also ask forhelp.
This is like something that Isee new moms struggle with all
(09:32):
the times that they think, okay,I'm a new mom, I have to
literally do it all.
No, you don't have to do it allNow with me.
My parents live literallyprobably like 10 minutes from me
.
I could walk there on a verynice day and so I would like
have my mom like watch mydaughter sometimes and stuff,
(09:54):
and I'm not saying like abusekindness or anything like that,
but like if you really need sometime, because sometimes what it
is, you need like a little houror two like of like undivided
attention to get something done,and you'd be surprised how much
you could get done in thatamount of time.
Like, even looking back at it,I I'm just like I don't even
know how in the world I did halfof the things in the timeframe.
(10:17):
But you know like okay, this,this child is going to wake up
in like 30 minutes, I've got 30minutes to try to figure this
out and you'll get things done.
So you have to also ask for helpbecause at the end of the day,
as a business owner, you're notgoing to, you can't do
everything necessarily yourself.
And it's the same thing becauseyou're in a situation right now
(10:39):
where you're business owner andmom at the same time, and so
that's give and take.
You're going to have toactually get some help for the
times when you need it.
Now, suppose you book clients.
That's the thing you get theclients now.
You you have to think about,okay, what's the childcare look
like when I'm actually doing thework for these clients, cause
(11:02):
that's the thing.
Like right now, you're like,okay, I need to make the money.
But if okay, you now, if youget like 10 clients, how are you
going to make that work?
So you have to.
I always say plan for what itis that you want your life to
look like.
Because if you keep asking, likeyou're constantly saying, like,
okay, I want to get fiveclients.
Well, you will get them.
You're going to get the fiveclients.
(11:22):
It's a matter of when you'regoing to get them.
But when you get them, how isit that you're going to handle
the demand of that?
So you have to do some majorfamily planning right now to get
this in order, figure out whatyour schedule should look like
and the whole nine yards, andyou find it it's easier that way
.
But I think, because you haveall these questions and you had
(11:44):
your, you know your littlestress about that, but I would
say this is how I'd recommend toapproach business and mom-ing
at the same time.
Brooke Monaghan (11:52):
Yeah, I think that.
So a few things that I'mhearing that I think are so
important to highlight.
The first is like, sorry,there's some very loud engine
outside of my window.
I don't really know.
I'm trying to film this in themiddle of downtown LA, so it's
just going to happen.
The first thing that I'm hearingis like, get specific.
(12:14):
So get specific about, like,what the balance could actually
look like for you, or what thepriorities actually are, what
the timelines actually are.
Like you know, if you're sayingyou've outgrown your current
space and you need to buy ahouse, like if you already have
a timeline on that, then thatmight be something that's not
movable and you have to move theother things around it.
But if that is movable, right.
(12:34):
Like so kind of sitting downand actually getting more
specific about what you actuallyneed, how much time you have,
if you get the clients or if youget the work, how you're
actually going to balance that.
And to your point aboutplanning for the life that you
want, I love that you bring thatup, because what I see happen
really often maybe not in thisspecific type of situation, but
(12:57):
people saying I want the clients, I want the money, I want all
of this to come in.
Also, though, feeling alreadyspread thin with everything else
that's going on, and they don'trealize that they're actually
holding themselves back fromgetting the work because there's
an underlying fear of not beingable to handle the work when it
does come in.
And so you've got to create likea clear kind of channel or some
(13:19):
amount of space for that workto come into.
And one of the things that Idid.
This is a totally differentsituation.
I did not have a child in themix.
I had the benefit of I mean, Ihave a partner so, like you know
, and he was just moving into anew job at the time.
But when I first started mybusiness, I realized that I was
(13:41):
filling so much of my time withlike busy work and I had to
actually cut down the amountthat I was working to create the
space where I would wantclients to go, just to prove to
myself that I was going toactually be able to handle
running the business and alsodoing the client work.
It was like I needed to cutback on all of that like
marketing and admin time, sothat I actually had the space
(14:02):
where clients could actuallycome in.
And I'm hearing some of that inwhat you're saying, like you've
got to create a plan where youknow that you'll actually be
able to handle the work.
And if you can't create thatplan, then maybe now is not the
time to be putting so muchpressure on yourself to be
getting clients and you figureout some kind of alternate
arrangement.
Exactly yeah.
Kimone Napier (14:23):
Yeah, because it's every it's all give and
take, there's only 24 hours in aday.
Like, you have to think aboutit like that, and you you're not
going to be working all of them.
Some of it is for rest, some ofit is going to be taking care
of your child, and if you'retrying to do the business, some
of it is going to take some timefor that.
So you have to plan out what itis your day can look like and
(14:47):
you're going to also have toplan for, like the non-ideal day
, because with children,anything could come up.
Yeah, like you know, you justhave no idea.
For example, like I remember,like last school year, I had
like a major meeting and then mydaughter was sick and I had to
go get her from school.
But I had a plan B.
Right, I couldn't go get herbecause I had this meeting, so I
(15:08):
arranged for somebody else inmy family to pick her up.
So, like you have to like planaccordingly in that way so you
don't overwhelm and stressyourself, because you have very
big, ambitious goals and I lovethat.
You have to like work backwardsin order to achieve the goals
that you want.
So maybe what it is right nowis you're working on the
(15:32):
foundation of your business,like, okay, how am I going to
get the clients in?
I don't know if you alreadyhave your site set up or a page
or something.
If you have that set up yet andthe whole nine yards, and how
much clients can you actuallytake on right now with your
current situation with yourchild?
I don't know how old your childis, but I think your child is
(15:55):
like six months.
Six months, yeah, right.
And so your child is alsobecoming a little bit more
independent.
I hope you also realize thattoo.
I actually feel like it'sinteresting when my daughter was
a baby and I was when I saybaby, I mean, you know, from the
time of birth up until probablylike a little bit before two it
(16:16):
was actually easier.
It's when they're like walking,talking, like that you can't
like as a baby they're just theycry when they want to be
changed, they cry when they wantto eat or they want your
attention, but like a toddler isjust going to run rampant and
stuff.
So actually use this time toactually really get the
(16:37):
foundational elements done, solike whether it's like you get
like your calendar together andstuff.
Maybe it's like, okay, Iremember with me when I had my
daughter.
I was like, okay, I could takecalls.
I had like a block of likethree hours for calls a day and
that's how I was, like I wouldtake my calls in between that
(16:58):
time.
The rest of the time I would dosome work in between the time.
So you just have to figure outwhat works for you.
But it will work.
You just have to really justset the intention and figure out
like your schedule to actuallyreally help you with this.
Otherwise you're going tostress yourself out and that's
what we don't want to do.
Brooke Monaghan (17:15):
Yeah, because, by the way, stress is going to
diminish your capacity for anyamount of creative thinking,
like it's going to require somuch creativity, like when
you're starting a business.
It just requires you to be ableto think outside of the box
about things, or really thinkcritically about how to solve a
problem.
And, like I cannot stress enoughas somebody who's not even had
(17:36):
to deal with raising a child,there have been situations that
I have gone through that are somuch less stressful than that
that have totally taken me outin terms of being able to
problem solve.
And so one of the things that'sreally interesting and I see
this with clients of mine islike sometimes getting a
part-time job actually canrelieve the stress, to free up
(17:59):
the creative energy to do someof this stuff.
You know, like it might takeyou four hours to get something
done when you're trying to do itwhile you're also thinking
about a million other things andare stressed, whereas if you
had gone to work for three hoursnot had to, you know had a
little bit of that stress setaside, you might be able to do
it in an hour because you'reable to focus.
(18:20):
So like part of it, too, iskind of knowing yourself, I
think, and when I hear you saywhat we don't want to do is
stress you out, I'm like tryingto underline that because I feel
like people don't understandhow important that part of it is
.
Especially if the reason whyyou want to build a business is
because you want to have someamount of, like, flexibility and
freedom.
Kimone Napier (18:47):
100%, because if you I said it before like, if
you're stressed, the baby willfeel that stress.
So that's what you don't wantto happen, and if you're
stressed, you're not going to bea benefit to yourself or to,
honestly, to anybody else.
That's the thing I remember.
The reason I got into business,too, was to relieve myself of a
(19:09):
lot of the stress.
I would have been superstressed out if I had stayed in
the job that I had prior togetting pregnant with my and
having a child.
Like I would have been superstressed out, and I know that.
And so you have to work tocreate the kind of lifestyle
that you want and you have toask for help.
Like it breaks my heart when Isee a lot of mothers they'll
(19:33):
they feel like they have to doit all themselves or figure it
all out all themselves, and itis impossible.
It's like it literally takes atribe to raise a child because
you're not going to be able todo all of this stuff, even when
you know your child is older andyour business is flowing and
stuff like that.
Like you are going to needsomebody to help you with
(19:55):
homework Sometimes maybe it'slike, and you're going to have
to clean the house and there'scooking and, of course, if you
have a partner, they can helpyou with that stuff too, but
they're also working as well.
So it's like it's a give andtake, but you have to figure out
, like, okay, this is what Iknow I can do, this is what I
need help with and I I tacklethat by making a list of all of
(20:17):
these things and knowing whereit is that I can show up and
where I need to show up andstuff Like, for example, you
know, like to me cleaning thehouse.
It takes so much time.
This is like a whole day affair, yeah.
Who has the time to do all ofthat stuff and you're running a
business, you have a kid, likethere's a lot of stuff that goes
(20:39):
into that, so get the help thatyou need.
Now I know you have financialconcerns right now, but at the
same time you have to plan.
So, whether it is like you havesomebody come in and help you,
maybe once a month, once everytwo months, whatever it is that
it looks like, you have to alsocreate a place for yourself
where you're going to be able toget the help that you need and
(21:01):
ask for help.
Whether it's like you you have,if you have a partner, like I'm
so tired but I need to finishthis.
Can you please handle dinnertonight?
Like whatever it is that youhave to do.
You have to do that becausedistress is not going to help
your business thrive, it's notgoing to help you thrive, and
(21:21):
then you don't want thattrickling down to your child.
So that would be my, my advicewith this question.
Brooke Monaghan (21:27):
Awesome, I love it.
Thank Kimone.
You are the one.
You were the number one personI wanted to answer this question
because I was like I knowsomeone who did it.
I'm going to get the phone.
Michelle Ward (21:41):
Just holding my heart.
I just want to give so muchlove to this new mama and and
their partner it seems like too.
I remember those days of, youknow, six months of baby hood
and just being in that bliss.
Alongside the sleep deprivation, alongside the like.
(22:05):
Yeah, whoever tells me next Ishould just work when the baby
naps, like I will murder them.
Like some of that, some of theadvice, you again is like no,
this can't actually be done.
So I'm just, I'm holding thatspace so much and I feel like
(22:26):
you know, I wish there was aclear cut answer that was like,
this is the right thing to do,but there's so many different
shades of gray and hopefullythere's relief in those shades
of gray.
Right, like I could tell thismama right now that there is a
solution for herself for herbusiness, for her family, and,
yes, there might need to be somecompromising right now or some
(22:50):
prioritizing.
I so I started my business in2008, I went full time in 2010.
And we got placed with ourdaughter via adoption when she
was five weeks old in 2014.
So I had more time andexperience under my belt than
(23:12):
this mom and obviously thecircumstances were a bit
different, because I kind ofsensed.
Like we sensed the placementwas coming that summer and I
tried to clear the decks as bestas I could, but like we
literally had four days' noticefor the like yeah, and here's
(23:33):
your baby.
Wow.
But between my experience andwhat I've helped my clients with
and what I've heard from themtoo, I think I think what needs
to happen is A.
you need to just set up a newstructure, and that structure
needs to be really flexible,because your baby is always
(23:56):
changing.
I joke that, like just when youthink your baby's on a schedule,
or like you know the routine,haha, that baby laughs at you
and is like haha, now you knowI'm going to nap, for you know,
at this time instead of thistime, or for this long instead
of this long, or I'm going tosleep this way, or whatever.
So I think that there needs tobe a new structure and I think
this mom and and her partnerreally sit down and say okay,
(24:22):
what are the minimum financialneeds of our family right now?
How are we bringing in thatmoney?
And this might be a season or atime where there is a bridge
job at play, and I use the termbridge job just to mean like
this is a job that just givesyou the money that you need that
(24:42):
like totally either takes awayor minimizes your financial
stress while leaving you timeand energy to work on your
business.
So whether that's her doesn'tmean she needs to jump into full
time employment.
Employment doesn't mean sheeven needs to be a part time
employee.
Might be a contract job, itmight be consulting or something
she has an experience.
(25:02):
It might be the art businessshe feels like.
You know she needs to bring in$2,000 a month and the art
business could do that?
Amazing.
So, sitting down with herpartner, what are the financial
needs?
How are we going to do that?
And then what's the structurefor support?
On that, I always feel like withnew motherhood, the less that
(25:28):
you could put on your plate thebetter, because you could always
add, but it's much harder totake things away.
So I think that's really key aswell, that this is probably not
the time for her to,you know we're recording this in
(25:48):
September and I want to imagine, with her art business, she's
thinking about the holidays andthe you know holiday markets and
the holiday sales, and you knowhow much art she wants to make
to sell.
This might not be, and probablyshouldn't be, the record
breaking year.
This probably isn't the yearwhere she's going to create all
this product or sign up for allthese markets, thinking again
(26:09):
like what's the minimal, minimal, viable plan to get what she
needs, maybe for the holidayseason, and just take baby steps
for her business.
And I hope she could findcomfort in the fact that over
the past 15 years of doing thiswork, I have learned firsthand
and through my clients that babysteps build the strongest
(26:30):
foundation, and so she shouldn'tthink of baby steps as
something that are less than orthat aren't going to get her
where she's going to go, or tofeel guilty or bad about it.
It's like no, actually, in thisseason, in this moment, taking
baby steps and just showing upfor her business as consistently
(26:50):
as she can in a way that'sgoing to work well for her and
her family and her prioritiesand their financial needs, like,
oh my gosh, crushing it.
Brooke Monaghan (27:02):
Yeah, I love that.
I think that anytime that Ihear a question from somebody
and this, honestly, I did noteven think about this and as
you're articulating this, I'mlike, oh right, of course, yeah,
yeah, right, of course.
This is why you have to do this, because I'm like, anytime I
hear someone ask a questionwhere there's like so many
different parts to it and it'svery clear that it feels very
(27:24):
heavy and the decision that'smade could have these
implications on how you're goingto live your whole life,
because does it mean you have tosacrifice everything that you
want?
Right?
It's like when you can pauseand clarify and define what you
actually do need, it can take alot of that weight out of it,
(27:48):
because now you actually cancreate a plan.
And I also love what you saidabout like I can't tell you the
number of people that I've hadconversations with who, not
because of this particularcircumstance, but they're in a
situation where it's like, okay,this is what I want to do, but
also, right now we're reallypressed financially.
And when I ask them, what doespressed financially mean?
(28:12):
What's the minimal amount ofmoney that you need to make in
order to be okay, it's like thatconversation hasn't happened,
which no judgment, right.
But it's just like clarify whatthat is, because you will fill
in that blank with a story thatis probably based on your own
money history and then you can'tcreate a plan.
(28:35):
And then also, once you do knowwhat the number is, you
actually don't need to stressyourself out to figure out how
to make your money, how to makeyour business make that money.
You can do some combination ofthings.
Michelle Ward (28:48):
Yes, yes, yes, thank you, thank you, I agree.
I co-sign, yes, yes, yes, Italk all the time, especially
when it comes to my clients whoare looking to, you know, lead
their day jobs and when do theyofficially their day jobs and
how much money do they need.
They're always running onassumptions about how much money
they think they need, how muchmoney they have, what's actually
(29:09):
coming in.
And when I say no, no, no, youneed to have a money date, you
need to actually look at thenumbers, I would say 100% of the
time they come back and they go, oh it's not as bad as I
thought, oh it's not as much asI thought we needed.
And it's stressful to show upand look at those numbers and
run those numbers.
I know the fear and the stressthat's there, but I could tell
(29:32):
you it is few and far betweenwhere there isn't relief that
comes through with actuallylooking at the numbers and not
just running on assumptions.
Totally, totally.
I wanted to add to this toobecause, funnily enough, you
sent me this question and then,totally coincidentally, one of
my clients came into my privatecommunity for a program I run
(29:56):
called Show Up Squad, and she'slike I'm pregnant, having my
first baby.
Like, please, mamas who hadbabies while they just started
their business, give me help.
And I was like this is amazing,amazing.
Amazing right serendipitous.
So, mama who wrote in, you arenot alone.
And I just got permission toshare some of the response from
(30:20):
my client, Dr Suset Laboy Perezof a littleawareness.
com.
She had twins two-ish years agoafter being, you know, a newish
entrepreneur, and I love whatshe shared.
She shared number one take allthe leave you can.
Number two take all the helpyou can.
(30:43):
Number three, like communicate,communicate, communicate.
I think this is also really key.
And she also said community,finding community and being
(31:03):
surrounded by people who aregoing through something similar.
And I love those kind of fourtouch points because I think
that really sums up what thepriorities are and what not to
gender stereotype.
But I feel like what, as women,we really struggle with, which
(31:23):
is putting away the super womancape, which is asking for help
and support.
I know, for me, my husband and I, by the time our baby came
around, I was the breadwinner,he was working as a freelancer
and we knew he was going to bekind of the primary caretaker
(31:45):
and I wasn't really able to takea full maternity leave, but I
was able like I limited my plate, I communicated to my clients
when the baby was here Hi, wehave this baby.
Like, I was able to shufflesome calls around and take some
time off, but there was a pointI forget how long it was, but we
(32:06):
just had a plan that like wecouldn't find a daycare in our
area that worked for us we livedin Brooklyn at the time.
Everything was ridiculouslyexpensive and prohibitive in
other ways and what we were ableto settle on was after a few
weeks possibly.
We had a good friend of ourswho had like nanny and
(32:30):
babysitting experience.
We're like can you be ourperson, I think, two days a week
.
She just came for six hours.
It just allowed my husband totake the time that he needed to
just have time to himself, dothings that he needed.
It allowed me to, like go andwork a bit more guilt-free than
(32:50):
I could otherwise, and that wassomething that we could afford.
So getting that support and shemight find you know there is a
babysitting situation or can Itap a grandparent on the
shoulder to come help me Likethere might be other ways to get
that.
Asking for that help and justcommunicating her needs in her
(33:12):
business and also in herpersonal life will help her as
an entrepreneur too.
Brooke Monaghan (33:19):
Yeah, totally.
And on that note aboutcommunity too and like getting
that kind of help, I have aclient who she does.
She has a friend who also has akid around the same age as hers
and they will do a thing whereit's like she'll go, she'll take
her kid to this friend's house,watch both of them while that
(33:42):
friend goes to yoga, yep, andthen that friend comes back and
watches both of them and thenshe goes to, like, the afternoon
yoga class, and so I know youknow I'm hearing in this that
there's a lot of financialstress and so, yeah, like if
there's any, like if there'sother people around where, like
you, can lean into each other tohelp each other out, that could
(34:02):
be an option as well.
Michelle Ward (34:03):
I love that.
Brooke Monaghan (34:04):
Yeah, and the final.
The other thing, too, that I dowant to point out is that in
this question they said is itpossible to start from scratch
during new baby season?
And I would say you're notstarting from scratch.
Yes, yeah, it's so easy to liketell yourself that that, like if
(34:24):
you take any time off, thenyou're going to have to totally
start over, but there's so muchstuff that you learned that you
got out of the way before thatyou're not going to have to go
through now.
So nothing is.
This is like, yeah, nothing,you're not starting from scratch
.
So I do not have children.
So, in addition to calling inMichelle Ward, who helps people
(34:51):
who are at the very beginning oftheir businesses, I was also
like let me also call somepeople in who know what it's
like trying to run, growwhatever a business with babies
around, because this is notsomething that I have experience
with, but it is something thatyou have experience with.
Hence why we're here.
Kirsty Fanton (35:09):
Amazing, and yes, that's right.
So I've got, I'm currentlypregnant with my second, who's
due in a few months, and myfirst is what's he now?
He's like two years and threemonths, so I've definitely been
in the phase of trying to juggleall the things and I think,
particularly when is in isn'tyou, it is so overwhelming.
Your whole life has justchanged, your plate is so full
(35:33):
and it's so hard to carve outtime for almost anything,
particularly if you don't have,you know, support nearby, like
family members or, you know,daycare is really expensive.
So without that as well,definitely a lot of challenges.
Yeah, I should say that I hadalready got my business set up
to a pretty decent point by thetime I went off to have my first
(35:53):
kid.
So a lot of my own experienceswon't be relevant to this
question, but I certainly workwith clients who have been in a
similar position to this person,right, okay?
So my first thought is that,six months in, like it's still.
Everything is still so new andI feel like, particularly in
that first 12 to 18 months oflife with a new person, things
(36:16):
are changing all the time and,you know, I found it to be so
true that you feel like youfinally reach a place where
you're like, oh, I've got thisdown pat, and then something
changes, like their sleep goesto shit again, or you know they
start walking or like whateverit might be, and you're like,
okay, we're back to square one.
Whole new set of challenges.
I have to adapt.
Brooke Monaghan (36:33):
I'm laughing because the first person that I
talked to about this questionsaid the exact same thing, so
we've reached consensus as faras I'm concerned on this front.
Yes.
Kirsty Fanton (36:43):
Amazing.
So I'm only saying that as astarting point, because I think
it is so challenging to try andadapt to that constant cycle of
flux and growth and change,while also trying to build a
business from you know not fromscratch, but certainly from a
place where you know thefoundations aren't yet set up to
(37:06):
support this person to do thework that they want and to earn
the money that they want.
Like that's a lot of wobblyfoundations to try and work with
.
So I just want to acknowledgethat it is really challenging
and normalize the fact that thisperson is finding it
challenging and finding itconfusing and finding it hard to
work out.
You know, do I actually pursuethis now or do I have to sort of
(37:27):
sacrifice this goal for now andfocus on other things?
You know, it's a really bigquestion.
So I just wanted to start there, and it's good to know that the
other person you spoke to,Michelle, has also confirmed
that.
Brooke Monaghan (37:39):
She was like as soon as you think that you've
got it down, this child is goingto laugh at you and like the
next thing is going to come upyeah, so yes.
Kirsty Fanton (37:53):
Cool.
So with that I think I mean I'ma huge believer that it is so
important to build a businessthat supports the life you want
to lead.
That's my whole thing, and ofcourse, that will look different
in different seasons of yourlife.
So, for example, my businessshifted significantly when I had
my first child because I hadbeen someone who had built a
(38:16):
business based on providingone-to-one services and that
really required a reliable wellfor my time to be really
reliable, to turn up to calls,to complete projects on time, to
meet deadlines and, of course,my energy to be at a reliable
kind of standard.
You know, throw a baby into themix and you know I was getting
(38:38):
up six to eight times a nightfor the first 13 months with my
first child.
So you know my sleep justwasn't there and he got sick all
the time when you first had adaycare as well.
So the reliability factorwasn't there either.
So, just again acknowledgingthat it's okay for your vision
for your business to lookdifferent based on the season
that you're in, and I wouldencourage this person to sit
(39:00):
down with themselves and alsowith their partner and have a
discussion about, you know, whatis the priority right now, what
is going to be more supportivefor this person?
Is it going to be that they havetime to pursue their passion
and get paid for that, or is itgoing to be that they go into
some other sort of work or someother sort of job to really get
(39:22):
the financials up and running inorder to buy the house and to
do other things that they wantto do to support their family?
And I think the key with that isknowing that it is a season.
Things will change, there willbe time and space for the other
stuff.
If that time is not now and Ialso think within that, like
(39:43):
holding the fact that even ifthe decision ends up being
really need to prioritisefinances right now and maybe
that means, you know, less time,energy, devoted to getting a
business set up, because youknow, often it takes a while for
the business to becomeprofitable and to bring in
significant amounts of money itdoesn't mean that there couldn't
also be some time in thatperson's days and that person's
(40:05):
weeks and months to do the kindof projects and the work that
they love.
And I think, particularly as anew parent, when your whole
identity is shifting and youhave such little time to devote
to the things that make you yououtside of being a parent.
That can be incrediblyimportant.
Brooke Monaghan (40:24):
That's such a good point.
That's such a good pointbecause, you know I a lot of
what you said was you know hasbeen is echoing conversation
another conversation that I'mgoing to share that we had about
this question.
With this, you know, get clearon like what you actually need
and maybe right now, likeunderstand that this is a season
(40:46):
, this isn't a decision that'sgoing to be forever right.
Like, just because you're notworking on your business right
now doesn't mean that you'rejust not working on your
business.
You can take baby steps, but Ilove this point about like using
the working on the businessalmost as like a thing that you
get to do for yourself, ratherthan a thing that you're
(41:08):
necessarily relying on, as, likethe thing that's going to
support you and the family rightnow.
I love that concept and I thinkthat the beautiful thing about
that, too, is it.
I mean this this is an artcareer, and so I'm always coming
back to like why do youactually want to do the work
that you do?
And if part of the reason whyyou want an art career is so
(41:32):
that you get to do art and becreative and whatever, like,
maybe that's the thing toprioritize for right now,
knowing that nothing that you doright now is going to be wasted
, and maybe later on is the timeto go full in on it, but not
putting so much pressure onyourself for right now.
Kirsty Fanton (41:49):
Yes, exactly Because I suspect that would be
potentially the more stressfulscenario.
If the decision is we reallyneed to focus on finances and
the way we're going to do thatis build this business up as
quickly as possible, given thatyou're still you know probably
still really young, your timeprobably isn't reliable.
Your energy, your resources,your capacity probably also
(42:11):
really stretched like to add theweight of that expectation on
top, could just be so stressfuland so weighty.
Your business and your work andyour passion and your craft and
your creative side canabsolutely be self care and I
certainly leant on my businessfor self care too like.
Time in my business when Olliewas young was self care and I
(42:31):
loved that because I got toreconnect with a part of myself
and things that I otherwisedidn't have the chance to do in
that crazy phase of having ayoung child.
Brooke Monaghan (42:42):
I love that.
Oh see, this is why I wantedmultiple people to weigh in on
this one, because this is aperspective that we didn't get
yet, and I think this is such agood point.
Is there anything else thatcomes to mind that you would
want to add in response?
Kirsty Fanton (42:59):
Let me think I feel like I'd love to have a
conversation with this personand find out more of the nitty
gritty details in terms of, like, what is set up, like, is there
low hanging fruit that you canmonetize or that you can sell,
or that you can, something thatyou can jump into really easily,
that you don't have to reallywork up to Like?
I would love to know thosekinds of things.
I feel like that kind ofinformation might help formulate
(43:23):
some sort of plan or strategyor way forward.
Brooke Monaghan (43:26):
Yeah, Well, yeah, I mean yeah, no, you're
right Like, is there anythingthat you can do?
That's just sort of like is itan opportunity?
It sounds like kind of what youwould be able to get from that
is to maybe just adjust to theway that you're thinking about
quote unquote building thebusiness.
And is there something easierthat you can do right now,
rather than going down the roadthat you've maybe decided you
(43:48):
have to go down to quote unquotehave to go down to build a
successful business?
That's like, well, is theresomething really easy that you
could do right now?
That's kind of in line, or evenas there is something easy that
you could do right now thatmaybe it doesn't even seem to
you to fit squarely in thebounds of what you thought your
business was going to be, butit's still something that feeds
that side of you, you know, orallows you the things that you
(44:12):
wanted to get out of buildingyour art career or your art
business.
So, like the person who askedthis question, if you want to
send in more questions withspecifics, go for it.
Kirsty Fanton (44:34):
Yes, round two.
I think the thing that we'reboth sort of swirling around
here is that it would be sohelpful, I think, for this
person to really define whatsuccess looks like for them
right now.
Yeah, because I think it's soeasy, regardless of, like, life
stage and business stage, tohave this idea of success.
(44:55):
So I did my quotation marksthen.
An idea of success that you knowis a certain kind of business
that earns a certain amount ofrevenue, that allows you to work
a certain amount of hours, andthat isn't everyone's version of
success.
That isn't the business that'sgoing to feel right for everyone
, and it's certainly not thebusiness that's going to feel
(45:17):
right for everyone at everystage of their life.
So I think the clearer you canget on what that looks like for
you right now, and that successmight be that you, you know,
have I don't know four hours aweek to create and you know if
you earn $1,000 a month fromthat, that's great and maybe
that's what you aim for.
And then I think, once you getthose goals dialed in, it
(45:39):
becomes easier to hatch a planto work towards that, because
you can sort of work backwardsLike here's the end, All right.
How am I going to get therefrom where I am now?
Like what's the bridge I'mgoing to build?
So I think that's what we'reboth talking about in roundabout
ways.
Brooke Monaghan (45:51):
Yeah, totally, totally, I love this.
Hello everybody , welcome back to another
episode of Make your BusinessWork For you.
I probably sound a little bitdifferent today because I am
coming off of being so sick.
It's just like one thing afteranother over here.
But here we are.
I'm actually feeling okay, butI'm feeling foggy and sound very
different.
Today's episode is a Q&A episode, and this is going to be the
(00:30):
first Q&A episode that you'rehearing that is of this specific
nature, so I just want to giveyou a little bit of an intro
into what you are about to hear.
This Q&A session is in responseto a very specific question.
The person who asked thisquestion gave a lot of context
about their identity and abouttheir specific situation.
(00:53):
They used the term mom.
They called themselves a newmom.
They gave a lot of contextabout the specific situation
that themselves and theirpartner are finding themselves
in.
I say all of this because thisis not a Q&A where we are
providing guidance to everybody.
This is guidance that's beingprovided to this person who
(01:15):
asked the question.
If you've never been in a groupcoaching program or something
like that before, you may nothave experienced this before,
but something that's so powerfulis hearing people ask their
questions, hearing the guidancethat's being given to that
specific person and being ableto sit and watch that and then
filter, through your ownexperience and your own lens,
(01:35):
that guidance that's being givenand taking your own takeaways
from it.
I say all of this because, inorder for that to be helpful for
you, you do need to know, goingin, that it is on you to hear
this and pull out the thingsthat work for you and the things
that resonate for you and arefor you, and leave the things
that are not, and understandthat this is not meant to be
(01:56):
guidance for everybody.
With that being said, if you donot want to hear an episode
that is full of language aboutbeing a mom specifically, or
about mothering specifically,this might not be an episode for
you.
I personally think that theguidance that's given in this
episode could be applicable toall parents, but, again, I also
(02:18):
know that hearing language likethat that is gendered usually
usually when people talk aboutbeing a mother oftentimes that
is gendered not always.
It can bring some of that up.
I'm just saying this because Iwant you to take care of
yourself and choose for yourselfif this is going to be helpful
for you or not.
You're going to hear from threedifferent people today.
(02:40):
I pulled in three differentpeople to provide their thoughts
on this question because it wasa big question.
There's a lot in it.
Also because I don't think thatthis is something that there's
just one answer to, and I alsothink that it was helpful to
hear different people'sperspectives.
The first person you're going tohear from is a friend of mine,
Kimone Napier.
Kimone uses she and herpronouns.
(03:01):
The reason I pulled Camone inis because she started her
business while she was onmaternity leave.
You're going to hear why thisis relevant to this question
once we dive into the Q&A.
Camone's specialty is actuallyin hiring and HR.
You're going to hear more fromCamone in future episodes about
team building and hiring, buttoday you are going to hear
specifically about her guidanceand thoughts on building a
(03:22):
business with a brand new babyat home.
Then you're going to hear fromMichelle Ward also uses she and
her pronouns.
Michelle is somebody who helpsentrepre-newbies as she calls
them bring their dreambusinesses to life.
She has some really greatperspective on this early, early
phase of business that thislistener is in.
Then you are going to hear fromKirsty Fanton also uses she and
(03:45):
her pronouns.
Now you're hearing why I'msaying Just know what you're
going into and the perspectivethat you're going to hear.
It is very much leaning in onedirection here, right, but
that's for a reason.
Kirsty is my go-to source onall things copywriting and
launch strategy, but she alsohappens to have a baby at home
(04:09):
and is expecting another one.
I wanted to have her weigh inas well.
Now you can always head to theshow notes to find links on how
you can connect with anybodywho's answering questions on
these episodes.
You can go to joinfruition.
com for the extended show notesand the transcripts.
You can also go to to submitquestions for future episodes.
(04:32):
I hope you find this episodehelpful.
If this is not an episode foryou today, I hope that you
listen to yourself and you goahead and skip past this one.
(04:53):
All right, here is the questionthat we got that made me want to
reach out to you specifically.
I'm a new mom with asix-month-old.
I was just starting to build myart career when we decided to
get pregnant and now I don'tknow how to balance the demands
of brand-new motherhood with mypassion for my craft and the
financial needs of my family.
I didn't have enough builtbefore the baby, so I don't have
(05:15):
much of a foundation to workwith.
It takes time to build abusiness, but we have to buy a
house.
We've outgrown our currentplace and it goes without saying
the prohibitive cost of childcare.
How do new moms who are alsobrand-new business owners
balance all of their familyneeds?
Time with the baby, financialgoals, personal passions.
Is it possible to start fromscratch during a new baby season
(05:36):
, or do I have to compromise mydesire to build the life that I
want, at least for a season, infavor of the life that my family
needs?
I expect that you're going tohave a one-sentence answer that
is just going to perfectly giveall of the answers that everyone
needs to know.
I'm just kidding, no pressure.
Kimone Napier (05:54):
Well, I wish, but what I will say with that
answer, if I was going to say itin a sentence you're going to
have to pace yourself with allof what you want to do.
I heard a couple of things.
You started this business,there's financial concerns,
you're trying to buy a house.
There's a lot of stuff to tryto manage all at one time.
(06:16):
You're going to have to paceyourself one step at a time.
For me personally, my pregnancywas my green light into
entrepreneurship.
I started my business when Iwas pregnant.
It was literally I was pregnantand I was just like well, this
is green light intoentrepreneurship because with my
(06:36):
working lifestyle, I live inNew York, I worked for the
government, I'm getting home atseven o'clock.
A baby did not fit into thepicture of a traditional work
environment, at least the way Iwas working at that time.
This was my green light intoentrepreneurship.
What I did specifically is thatI started to do a lot of
(06:58):
research and I started to buildwhile I was pregnant.
I even started to get my firstcouple of clients, because the
first ones usually come fromyour network, people who know
you so I could get someexperience.
When my daughter was born, Ibuilt my first website by myself
(07:19):
.
I did all of that stuff.
In terms of figuring out how towork when you have a child.
I would literally work around mydaughter's sleep schedule.
Literally, when they're small,when they're babies, all they
really do is eat and sleep.
Really for the first three tofour months they don't really do
(07:41):
much.
Of course you're going to playwith them and stuff like that.
I used to work around that.
She would literally be next tomy desk.
I'd have her in her bouncer orher swing or something, occupy
her time.
I'd take breaks.
On my breaks we'd either go outfor a walk or something and
things like that.
I'd find a way to work aroundit.
Then, when I started to reallybook more clients, and get more
(08:05):
busy, I would schedule the callsaround her sleep cycle because
eventually your child you'regoing to notice okay, they
always sleep at this particulartime.
You'll schedule your callsaround that.
It made it quite easy for me atthat time.
In terms of your question aboutokay, you've outgrown your space
(08:26):
, you want to buy a new house,you're going to have to pace
yourself with that I don't thinkit's necessarily the most
realistic thing to like.
You're like okay, I'm trying tobuild a business, mom, and buy
a house.
That's a lot.
Buying a house is not like yougo out and buy a house tomorrow.
It's a process.
(08:48):
What I would say is figure outwhat it is that you can do, how
you can work around your child'sschedule.
Try to start getting a coupleclients, start to set money
aside so you can buy the house.
Maybe it's like you're lookingat your financials.
You can put a timeline on it.
Maybe it's like six months,maybe it's a year, just depends
(09:10):
on how much money you'rebringing in and the whole nine
yards.
But you have to create a plan.
This is going to take planning,because what you don't want to
do is stress yourself out.
If you're stressed, your babyis going to also be stressed.
That's the way that you canwork around that.
Then you need to also ask forhelp.
This is like something that Isee new moms struggle with all
(09:32):
the times that they think, okay,I'm a new mom, I have to
literally do it all.
No, you don't have to do it allNow with me.
My parents live literallyprobably like 10 minutes from me
.
I could walk there on a verynice day and so I would like
have my mom like watch mydaughter sometimes and stuff,
(09:54):
and I'm not saying like abusekindness or anything like that,
but like if you really need sometime, because sometimes what it
is, you need like a little houror two like of like undivided
attention to get something done,and you'd be surprised how much
you could get done in thatamount of time.
Like, even looking back at it,I I'm just like I don't even
know how in the world I did halfof the things in the timeframe.
(10:17):
But you know like okay, this,this child is going to wake up
in like 30 minutes, I've got 30minutes to try to figure this
out and you'll get things done.
So you have to also ask for helpbecause at the end of the day,
as a business owner, you're notgoing to, you can't do
everything necessarily yourself.
And it's the same thing becauseyou're in a situation right now
(10:39):
where you're business owner andmom at the same time, and so
that's give and take.
You're going to have toactually get some help for the
times when you need it.
Now, suppose you book clients.
That's the thing you get theclients now.
You you have to think about,okay, what's the childcare look
like when I'm actually doing thework for these clients, cause
(11:02):
that's the thing.
Like right now, you're like,okay, I need to make the money.
But if okay, you now, if youget like 10 clients, how are you
going to make that work?
So you have to.
I always say plan for what itis that you want your life to
look like.
Because if you keep asking, likeyou're constantly saying, like,
okay, I want to get fiveclients.
Well, you will get them.
You're going to get the fiveclients.
(11:22):
It's a matter of when you'regoing to get them.
But when you get them, how isit that you're going to handle
the demand of that?
So you have to do some majorfamily planning right now to get
this in order, figure out whatyour schedule should look like
and the whole nine yards, andyou find it it's easier that way
.
But I think, because you haveall these questions and you had
(11:44):
your, you know your littlestress about that, but I would
say this is how I'd recommend toapproach business and mom-ing
at the same time.
Brooke Monaghan (11:52):
Yeah, I think that.
So a few things that I'mhearing that I think are so
important to highlight.
The first is like, sorry,there's some very loud engine
outside of my window.
I don't really know.
I'm trying to film this in themiddle of downtown LA, so it's
just going to happen.
The first thing that I'm hearingis like, get specific.
(12:14):
So get specific about, like,what the balance could actually
look like for you, or what thepriorities actually are, what
the timelines actually are.
Like you know, if you're sayingyou've outgrown your current
space and you need to buy ahouse, like if you already have
a timeline on that, then thatmight be something that's not
movable and you have to move theother things around it.
But if that is movable, right.
(12:34):
Like so kind of sitting downand actually getting more
specific about what you actuallyneed, how much time you have,
if you get the clients or if youget the work, how you're
actually going to balance that.
And to your point aboutplanning for the life that you
want, I love that you bring thatup, because what I see happen
really often maybe not in thisspecific type of situation, but
(12:57):
people saying I want the clients, I want the money, I want all
of this to come in.
Also, though, feeling alreadyspread thin with everything else
that's going on, and they don'trealize that they're actually
holding themselves back fromgetting the work because there's
an underlying fear of not beingable to handle the work when it
does come in.
And so you've got to create likea clear kind of channel or some
(13:19):
amount of space for that workto come into.
And one of the things that Idid.
This is a totally differentsituation.
I did not have a child in themix.
I had the benefit of I mean, Ihave a partner so, like you know
, and he was just moving into anew job at the time.
But when I first started mybusiness, I realized that I was
(13:41):
filling so much of my time withlike busy work and I had to
actually cut down the amountthat I was working to create the
space where I would wantclients to go, just to prove to
myself that I was going toactually be able to handle
running the business and alsodoing the client work.
It was like I needed to cutback on all of that like
marketing and admin time, sothat I actually had the space
(14:02):
where clients could actuallycome in.
And I'm hearing some of that inwhat you're saying, like you've
got to create a plan where youknow that you'll actually be
able to handle the work.
And if you can't create thatplan, then maybe now is not the
time to be putting so muchpressure on yourself to be
getting clients and you figureout some kind of alternate
arrangement.
Exactly yeah.
Kimone Napier (14:23):
Yeah, because it's every it's all give and
take, there's only 24 hours in aday.
Like, you have to think aboutit like that, and you you're not
going to be working all of them.
Some of it is for rest, some ofit is going to be taking care
of your child, and if you'retrying to do the business, some
of it is going to take some timefor that.
So you have to plan out what itis your day can look like and
(14:47):
you're going to also have toplan for, like the non-ideal day
, because with children,anything could come up.
Yeah, like you know, you justhave no idea.
For example, like I remember,like last school year, I had
like a major meeting and then mydaughter was sick and I had to
go get her from school.
But I had a plan B.
Right, I couldn't go get herbecause I had this meeting, so I
(15:08):
arranged for somebody else inmy family to pick her up.
So, like you have to like planaccordingly in that way so you
don't overwhelm and stressyourself, because you have very
big, ambitious goals and I lovethat.
You have to like work backwardsin order to achieve the goals
that you want.
So maybe what it is right nowis you're working on the
(15:32):
foundation of your business,like, okay, how am I going to
get the clients in?
I don't know if you alreadyhave your site set up or a page
or something.
If you have that set up yet andthe whole nine yards, and how
much clients can you actuallytake on right now with your
current situation with yourchild?
I don't know how old your childis, but I think your child is
(15:55):
like six months.
Six months, yeah, right.
And so your child is alsobecoming a little bit more
independent.
I hope you also realize thattoo.
I actually feel like it'sinteresting when my daughter was
a baby and I was when I saybaby, I mean, you know, from the
time of birth up until probablylike a little bit before two it
(16:16):
was actually easier.
It's when they're like walking,talking, like that you can't
like as a baby they're just theycry when they want to be
changed, they cry when they wantto eat or they want your
attention, but like a toddler isjust going to run rampant and
stuff.
So actually use this time toactually really get the
(16:37):
foundational elements done, solike whether it's like you get
like your calendar together andstuff.
Maybe it's like, okay, Iremember with me when I had my
daughter.
I was like, okay, I could takecalls.
I had like a block of likethree hours for calls a day and
that's how I was, like I wouldtake my calls in between that
(16:58):
time.
The rest of the time I would dosome work in between the time.
So you just have to figure outwhat works for you.
But it will work.
You just have to really justset the intention and figure out
like your schedule to actuallyreally help you with this.
Otherwise you're going tostress yourself out and that's
what we don't want to do.
Brooke Monaghan (17:15):
Yeah, because, by the way, stress is going to
diminish your capacity for anyamount of creative thinking,
like it's going to require somuch creativity, like when
you're starting a business.
It just requires you to be ableto think outside of the box
about things, or really thinkcritically about how to solve a
problem.
And, like I cannot stress enoughas somebody who's not even had
(17:36):
to deal with raising a child,there have been situations that
I have gone through that are somuch less stressful than that
that have totally taken me outin terms of being able to
problem solve.
And so one of the things that'sreally interesting and I see
this with clients of mine islike sometimes getting a
part-time job actually canrelieve the stress, to free up
(17:59):
the creative energy to do someof this stuff.
You know, like it might takeyou four hours to get something
done when you're trying to do itwhile you're also thinking
about a million other things andare stressed, whereas if you
had gone to work for three hoursnot had to, you know had a
little bit of that stress setaside, you might be able to do
it in an hour because you'reable to focus.
(18:20):
So like part of it, too, iskind of knowing yourself, I
think, and when I hear you saywhat we don't want to do is
stress you out, I'm like tryingto underline that because I feel
like people don't understandhow important that part of it is
.
Especially if the reason whyyou want to build a business is
because you want to have someamount of, like, flexibility and
freedom.
Kimone Napier (18:47):
100%, because if you I said it before like, if
you're stressed, the baby willfeel that stress.
So that's what you don't wantto happen, and if you're
stressed, you're not going to bea benefit to yourself or to,
honestly, to anybody else.
That's the thing I remember.
The reason I got into business,too, was to relieve myself of a
(19:09):
lot of the stress.
I would have been superstressed out if I had stayed in
the job that I had prior togetting pregnant with my and
having a child.
Like I would have been superstressed out, and I know that.
And so you have to work tocreate the kind of lifestyle
that you want and you have toask for help.
Like it breaks my heart when Isee a lot of mothers they'll
(19:33):
they feel like they have to doit all themselves or figure it
all out all themselves, and itis impossible.
It's like it literally takes atribe to raise a child because
you're not going to be able todo all of this stuff, even when
you know your child is older andyour business is flowing and
stuff like that.
Like you are going to needsomebody to help you with
(19:55):
homework Sometimes maybe it'slike, and you're going to have
to clean the house and there'scooking and, of course, if you
have a partner, they can helpyou with that stuff too, but
they're also working as well.
So it's like it's a give andtake, but you have to figure out
, like, okay, this is what Iknow I can do, this is what I
need help with and I I tacklethat by making a list of all of
(20:17):
these things and knowing whereit is that I can show up and
where I need to show up andstuff Like, for example, you
know, like to me cleaning thehouse.
It takes so much time.
This is like a whole day affair, yeah.
Who has the time to do all ofthat stuff and you're running a
business, you have a kid, likethere's a lot of stuff that goes
(20:39):
into that, so get the help thatyou need.
Now I know you have financialconcerns right now, but at the
same time you have to plan.
So, whether it is like you havesomebody come in and help you,
maybe once a month, once everytwo months, whatever it is that
it looks like, you have to alsocreate a place for yourself
where you're going to be able toget the help that you need and
(21:01):
ask for help.
Whether it's like you you have,if you have a partner, like I'm
so tired but I need to finishthis.
Can you please handle dinnertonight?
Like whatever it is that youhave to do.
You have to do that becausedistress is not going to help
your business thrive, it's notgoing to help you thrive, and
(21:21):
then you don't want thattrickling down to your child.
So that would be my, my advicewith this question.
Brooke Monaghan (21:27):
Awesome, I love it.
Thank Kimone.
You are the one.
You were the number one personI wanted to answer this question
because I was like I knowsomeone who did it.
I'm going to get the phone.
Michelle Ward (21:41):
Just holding my heart.
I just want to give so muchlove to this new mama and and
their partner it seems like too.
I remember those days of, youknow, six months of baby hood
and just being in that bliss.
Alongside the sleep deprivation, alongside the like.
(22:05):
Yeah, whoever tells me next Ishould just work when the baby
naps, like I will murder them.
Like some of that, some of theadvice, you again is like no,
this can't actually be done.
So I'm just, I'm holding thatspace so much and I feel like
(22:26):
you know, I wish there was aclear cut answer that was like,
this is the right thing to do,but there's so many different
shades of gray and hopefullythere's relief in those shades
of gray.
Right, like I could tell thismama right now that there is a
solution for herself for herbusiness, for her family, and,
yes, there might need to be somecompromising right now or some
(22:50):
prioritizing.
I so I started my business in2008, I went full time in 2010.
And we got placed with ourdaughter via adoption when she
was five weeks old in 2014.
So I had more time andexperience under my belt than
(23:12):
this mom and obviously thecircumstances were a bit
different, because I kind ofsensed.
Like we sensed the placementwas coming that summer and I
tried to clear the decks as bestas I could, but like we
literally had four days' noticefor the like yeah, and here's
(23:33):
your baby.
Wow.
But between my experience andwhat I've helped my clients with
and what I've heard from themtoo, I think I think what needs
to happen is A.
you need to just set up a newstructure, and that structure
needs to be really flexible,because your baby is always
(23:56):
changing.
I joke that, like just when youthink your baby's on a schedule,
or like you know the routine,haha, that baby laughs at you
and is like haha, now you knowI'm going to nap, for you know,
at this time instead of thistime, or for this long instead
of this long, or I'm going tosleep this way, or whatever.
So I think that there needs tobe a new structure and I think
this mom and and her partnerreally sit down and say okay,
(24:22):
what are the minimum financialneeds of our family right now?
How are we bringing in thatmoney?
And this might be a season or atime where there is a bridge
job at play, and I use the termbridge job just to mean like
this is a job that just givesyou the money that you need that
(24:42):
like totally either takes awayor minimizes your financial
stress while leaving you timeand energy to work on your
business.
So whether that's her doesn'tmean she needs to jump into full
time employment.
Employment doesn't mean sheeven needs to be a part time
employee.
Might be a contract job, itmight be consulting or something
she has an experience.
(25:02):
It might be the art businessshe feels like.
You know she needs to bring in$2,000 a month and the art
business could do that?
Amazing.
So, sitting down with herpartner, what are the financial
needs?
How are we going to do that?
And then what's the structurefor support?
On that, I always feel like withnew motherhood, the less that
(25:28):
you could put on your plate thebetter, because you could always
add, but it's much harder totake things away.
So I think that's really key aswell, that this is probably not
the time for her to,you know we're recording this in
(25:48):
September and I want to imagine, with her art business, she's
thinking about the holidays andthe you know holiday markets and
the holiday sales, and you knowhow much art she wants to make
to sell.
This might not be, and probablyshouldn't be, the record
breaking year.
This probably isn't the yearwhere she's going to create all
this product or sign up for allthese markets, thinking again
(26:09):
like what's the minimal, minimal, viable plan to get what she
needs, maybe for the holidayseason, and just take baby steps
for her business.
And I hope she could findcomfort in the fact that over
the past 15 years of doing thiswork, I have learned firsthand
and through my clients that babysteps build the strongest
(26:30):
foundation, and so she shouldn'tthink of baby steps as
something that are less than orthat aren't going to get her
where she's going to go, or tofeel guilty or bad about it.
It's like no, actually, in thisseason, in this moment, taking
baby steps and just showing upfor her business as consistently
(26:50):
as she can in a way that'sgoing to work well for her and
her family and her prioritiesand their financial needs, like,
oh my gosh, crushing it.
Brooke Monaghan (27:02):
Yeah, I love that.
I think that anytime that Ihear a question from somebody
and this, honestly, I did noteven think about this and as
you're articulating this, I'mlike, oh right, of course, yeah,
yeah, right, of course.
This is why you have to do this, because I'm like, anytime I
hear someone ask a questionwhere there's like so many
different parts to it and it'svery clear that it feels very
(27:24):
heavy and the decision that'smade could have these
implications on how you're goingto live your whole life,
because does it mean you have tosacrifice everything that you
want?
Right?
It's like when you can pauseand clarify and define what you
actually do need, it can take alot of that weight out of it,
(27:48):
because now you actually cancreate a plan.
And I also love what you saidabout like I can't tell you the
number of people that I've hadconversations with who, not
because of this particularcircumstance, but they're in a
situation where it's like, okay,this is what I want to do, but
also, right now we're reallypressed financially.
And when I ask them, what doespressed financially mean?
(28:12):
What's the minimal amount ofmoney that you need to make in
order to be okay, it's like thatconversation hasn't happened,
which no judgment, right.
But it's just like clarify whatthat is, because you will fill
in that blank with a story thatis probably based on your own
money history and then you can'tcreate a plan.
(28:35):
And then also, once you do knowwhat the number is, you
actually don't need to stressyourself out to figure out how
to make your money, how to makeyour business make that money.
You can do some combination ofthings.
Michelle Ward (28:48):
Yes, yes, yes, thank you, thank you, I agree.
I co-sign, yes, yes, yes, Italk all the time, especially
when it comes to my clients whoare looking to, you know, lead
their day jobs and when do theyofficially their day jobs and
how much money do they need.
They're always running onassumptions about how much money
they think they need, how muchmoney they have, what's actually
(29:09):
coming in.
And when I say no, no, no, youneed to have a money date, you
need to actually look at thenumbers, I would say 100% of the
time they come back and they go, oh it's not as bad as I
thought, oh it's not as much asI thought we needed.
And it's stressful to show upand look at those numbers and
run those numbers.
I know the fear and the stressthat's there, but I could tell
(29:32):
you it is few and far betweenwhere there isn't relief that
comes through with actuallylooking at the numbers and not
just running on assumptions.
Totally, totally.
I wanted to add to this toobecause, funnily enough, you
sent me this question and then,totally coincidentally, one of
my clients came into my privatecommunity for a program I run
(29:56):
called Show Up Squad, and she'slike I'm pregnant, having my
first baby.
Like, please, mamas who hadbabies while they just started
their business, give me help.
And I was like this is amazing,amazing.
Amazing right serendipitous.
So, mama who wrote in, you arenot alone.
And I just got permission toshare some of the response from
(30:20):
my client, Dr Suset Laboy Perezof a littleawareness.
com.
She had twins two-ish years agoafter being, you know, a newish
entrepreneur, and I love whatshe shared.
She shared number one take allthe leave you can.
Number two take all the helpyou can.
(30:43):
Number three, like communicate,communicate, communicate.
I think this is also really key.
And she also said community,finding community and being
(31:03):
surrounded by people who aregoing through something similar.
And I love those kind of fourtouch points because I think
that really sums up what thepriorities are and what not to
gender stereotype.
But I feel like what, as women,we really struggle with, which
(31:23):
is putting away the super womancape, which is asking for help
and support.
I know, for me, my husband and I, by the time our baby came
around, I was the breadwinner,he was working as a freelancer
and we knew he was going to bekind of the primary caretaker
(31:45):
and I wasn't really able to takea full maternity leave, but I
was able like I limited my plate, I communicated to my clients
when the baby was here Hi, wehave this baby.
Like, I was able to shufflesome calls around and take some
time off, but there was a pointI forget how long it was, but we
(32:06):
just had a plan that like wecouldn't find a daycare in our
area that worked for us we livedin Brooklyn at the time.
Everything was ridiculouslyexpensive and prohibitive in
other ways and what we were ableto settle on was after a few
weeks possibly.
We had a good friend of ourswho had like nanny and
(32:30):
babysitting experience.
We're like can you be ourperson, I think, two days a week
.
She just came for six hours.
It just allowed my husband totake the time that he needed to
just have time to himself, dothings that he needed.
It allowed me to, like go andwork a bit more guilt-free than
(32:50):
I could otherwise, and that wassomething that we could afford.
So getting that support and shemight find you know there is a
babysitting situation or can Itap a grandparent on the
shoulder to come help me Likethere might be other ways to get
that.
Asking for that help and justcommunicating her needs in her
(33:12):
business and also in herpersonal life will help her as
an entrepreneur too.
Brooke Monaghan (33:19):
Yeah, totally.
And on that note aboutcommunity too and like getting
that kind of help, I have aclient who she does.
She has a friend who also has akid around the same age as hers
and they will do a thing whereit's like she'll go, she'll take
her kid to this friend's house,watch both of them while that
(33:42):
friend goes to yoga, yep, andthen that friend comes back and
watches both of them and thenshe goes to, like, the afternoon
yoga class, and so I know youknow I'm hearing in this that
there's a lot of financialstress and so, yeah, like if
there's any, like if there'sother people around where, like
you, can lean into each other tohelp each other out, that could
(34:02):
be an option as well.
Michelle Ward (34:03):
I love that.
Brooke Monaghan (34:04):
Yeah, and the final.
The other thing, too, that I dowant to point out is that in
this question they said is itpossible to start from scratch
during new baby season?
And I would say you're notstarting from scratch.
Yes, yeah, it's so easy to liketell yourself that that, like if
(34:24):
you take any time off, thenyou're going to have to totally
start over, but there's so muchstuff that you learned that you
got out of the way before thatyou're not going to have to go
through now.
So nothing is.
This is like, yeah, nothing,you're not starting from scratch
.
So I do not have children.
So, in addition to calling inMichelle Ward, who helps people
(34:51):
who are at the very beginning oftheir businesses, I was also
like let me also call somepeople in who know what it's
like trying to run, growwhatever a business with babies
around, because this is notsomething that I have experience
with, but it is something thatyou have experience with.
Hence why we're here.
Kirsty Fanton (35:09):
Amazing, and yes, that's right.
So I've got, I'm currentlypregnant with my second, who's
due in a few months, and myfirst is what's he now?
He's like two years and threemonths, so I've definitely been
in the phase of trying to juggleall the things and I think,
particularly when is in isn'tyou, it is so overwhelming.
Your whole life has justchanged, your plate is so full
(35:33):
and it's so hard to carve outtime for almost anything,
particularly if you don't have,you know, support nearby, like
family members or, you know,daycare is really expensive.
So without that as well,definitely a lot of challenges.
Yeah, I should say that I hadalready got my business set up
to a pretty decent point by thetime I went off to have my first
(35:53):
kid.
So a lot of my own experienceswon't be relevant to this
question, but I certainly workwith clients who have been in a
similar position to this person,right, okay?
So my first thought is that,six months in, like it's still.
Everything is still so new andI feel like, particularly in
that first 12 to 18 months oflife with a new person, things
(36:16):
are changing all the time and,you know, I found it to be so
true that you feel like youfinally reach a place where
you're like, oh, I've got thisdown pat, and then something
changes, like their sleep goesto shit again, or you know they
start walking or like whateverit might be, and you're like,
okay, we're back to square one.
Whole new set of challenges.
I have to adapt.
Brooke Monaghan (36:33):
I'm laughing because the first person that I
talked to about this questionsaid the exact same thing, so
we've reached consensus as faras I'm concerned on this front.
Yes.
Kirsty Fanton (36:43):
Amazing.
So I'm only saying that as astarting point, because I think
it is so challenging to try andadapt to that constant cycle of
flux and growth and change,while also trying to build a
business from you know not fromscratch, but certainly from a
place where you know thefoundations aren't yet set up to
(37:06):
support this person to do thework that they want and to earn
the money that they want.
Like that's a lot of wobblyfoundations to try and work with
.
So I just want to acknowledgethat it is really challenging
and normalize the fact that thisperson is finding it
challenging and finding itconfusing and finding it hard to
work out.
You know, do I actually pursuethis now or do I have to sort of
(37:27):
sacrifice this goal for now andfocus on other things?
You know, it's a really bigquestion.
So I just wanted to start there, and it's good to know that the
other person you spoke to,Michelle, has also confirmed
that.
Brooke Monaghan (37:39):
She was like as soon as you think that you've
got it down, this child is goingto laugh at you and like the
next thing is going to come upyeah, so yes.
Kirsty Fanton (37:53):
Cool.
So with that I think I mean I'ma huge believer that it is so
important to build a businessthat supports the life you want
to lead.
That's my whole thing, and ofcourse, that will look different
in different seasons of yourlife.
So, for example, my businessshifted significantly when I had
my first child because I hadbeen someone who had built a
(38:16):
business based on providingone-to-one services and that
really required a reliable wellfor my time to be really
reliable, to turn up to calls,to complete projects on time, to
meet deadlines and, of course,my energy to be at a reliable
kind of standard.
You know, throw a baby into themix and you know I was getting
(38:38):
up six to eight times a nightfor the first 13 months with my
first child.
So you know my sleep justwasn't there and he got sick all
the time when you first had adaycare as well.
So the reliability factorwasn't there either.
So, just again acknowledgingthat it's okay for your vision
for your business to lookdifferent based on the season
that you're in, and I wouldencourage this person to sit
(39:00):
down with themselves and alsowith their partner and have a
discussion about, you know, whatis the priority right now, what
is going to be more supportivefor this person?
Is it going to be that they havetime to pursue their passion
and get paid for that, or is itgoing to be that they go into
some other sort of work or someother sort of job to really get
(39:22):
the financials up and running inorder to buy the house and to
do other things that they wantto do to support their family?
And I think the key with that isknowing that it is a season.
Things will change, there willbe time and space for the other
stuff.
If that time is not now and Ialso think within that, like
(39:43):
holding the fact that even ifthe decision ends up being
really need to prioritisefinances right now and maybe
that means, you know, less time,energy, devoted to getting a
business set up, because youknow, often it takes a while for
the business to becomeprofitable and to bring in
significant amounts of money itdoesn't mean that there couldn't
also be some time in thatperson's days and that person's
(40:05):
weeks and months to do the kindof projects and the work that
they love.
And I think, particularly as anew parent, when your whole
identity is shifting and youhave such little time to devote
to the things that make you yououtside of being a parent.
That can be incrediblyimportant.
Brooke Monaghan (40:24):
That's such a good point.
That's such a good pointbecause, you know I a lot of
what you said was you know hasbeen is echoing conversation
another conversation that I'mgoing to share that we had about
this question.
With this, you know, get clearon like what you actually need
and maybe right now, likeunderstand that this is a season
(40:46):
, this isn't a decision that'sgoing to be forever right.
Like, just because you're notworking on your business right
now doesn't mean that you'rejust not working on your
business.
You can take baby steps, but Ilove this point about like using
the working on the businessalmost as like a thing that you
get to do for yourself, ratherthan a thing that you're
(41:08):
necessarily relying on, as, likethe thing that's going to
support you and the family rightnow.
I love that concept and I thinkthat the beautiful thing about
that, too, is it.
I mean this this is an artcareer, and so I'm always coming
back to like why do youactually want to do the work
that you do?
And if part of the reason whyyou want an art career is so
(41:32):
that you get to do art and becreative and whatever, like,
maybe that's the thing toprioritize for right now,
knowing that nothing that you doright now is going to be wasted
, and maybe later on is the timeto go full in on it, but not
putting so much pressure onyourself for right now.
Kirsty Fanton (41:49):
Yes, exactly Because I suspect that would be
potentially the more stressfulscenario.
If the decision is we reallyneed to focus on finances and
the way we're going to do thatis build this business up as
quickly as possible, given thatyou're still you know probably
still really young, your timeprobably isn't reliable.
Your energy, your resources,your capacity probably also
(42:11):
really stretched like to add theweight of that expectation on
top, could just be so stressfuland so weighty.
Your business and your work andyour passion and your craft and
your creative side canabsolutely be self care and I
certainly leant on my businessfor self care too like.
Time in my business when Olliewas young was self care and I
(42:31):
loved that because I got toreconnect with a part of myself
and things that I otherwisedidn't have the chance to do in
that crazy phase of having ayoung child.
Brooke Monaghan (42:42):
I love that.
Oh see, this is why I wantedmultiple people to weigh in on
this one, because this is aperspective that we didn't get
yet, and I think this is such agood point.
Is there anything else thatcomes to mind that you would
want to add in response?
Kirsty Fanton (42:59):
Let me think I feel like I'd love to have a
conversation with this personand find out more of the nitty
gritty details in terms of, like, what is set up, like, is there
low hanging fruit that you canmonetize or that you can sell,
or that you can, something thatyou can jump into really easily,
that you don't have to reallywork up to Like?
I would love to know thosekinds of things.
I feel like that kind ofinformation might help formulate
(43:23):
some sort of plan or strategyor way forward.
Brooke Monaghan (43:26):
Yeah, Well, yeah, I mean yeah, no, you're
right Like, is there anythingthat you can do?
That's just sort of like is itan opportunity?
It sounds like kind of what youwould be able to get from that
is to maybe just adjust to theway that you're thinking about
quote unquote building thebusiness.
And is there something easierthat you can do right now,
rather than going down the roadthat you've maybe decided you
(43:48):
have to go down to quote unquotehave to go down to build a
successful business?
That's like, well, is theresomething really easy that you
could do right now?
That's kind of in line, or evenas there is something easy that
you could do right now thatmaybe it doesn't even seem to
you to fit squarely in thebounds of what you thought your
business was going to be, butit's still something that feeds
that side of you, you know, orallows you the things that you
(44:12):
wanted to get out of buildingyour art career or your art
business.
So, like the person who askedthis question, if you want to
send in more questions withspecifics, go for it.
Kirsty Fanton (44:34):
Yes, round two.
I think the thing that we'reboth sort of swirling around
here is that it would be sohelpful, I think, for this
person to really define whatsuccess looks like for them
right now.
Yeah, because I think it's soeasy, regardless of, like, life
stage and business stage, tohave this idea of success.
(44:55):
So I did my quotation marksthen.
An idea of success that you knowis a certain kind of business
that earns a certain amount ofrevenue, that allows you to work
a certain amount of hours, andthat isn't everyone's version of
success.
That isn't the business that'sgoing to feel right for everyone
, and it's certainly not thebusiness that's going to feel
(45:17):
right for everyone at everystage of their life.
So I think the clearer you canget on what that looks like for
you right now, and that successmight be that you, you know,
have I don't know four hours aweek to create and you know if
you earn $1,000 a month fromthat, that's great and maybe
that's what you aim for.
And then I think, once you getthose goals dialed in, it
(45:39):
becomes easier to hatch a planto work towards that, because
you can sort of work backwardsLike here's the end, All right.
How am I going to get therefrom where I am now?
Like what's the bridge I'mgoing to build?
So I think that's what we'reboth talking about in roundabout
ways.
Brooke Monaghan (45:51):
Yeah, totally, totally, I love this.
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