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February 10, 2021 49 min

You never saw yourself as a complainer, heck, you still don’t. Yet, what used to be a rare occurrence based on a situation, complaining about the traffic you hit during rush hour or complaining about your co-worker after they dropped the ball on a project and left you having to work until all hours to clean it up, has now become an everyday habit.

Things that should be rolling off your back are substantial and are getting a part in your play of life. It is as if your natural set point is level at complaining

Are you listening to the intro and thinking, “Not me?”  then you are far more advanced than most of us humans. In this episode, we are going to explore the world that is riddled with complainers and share thoughts and ideas around how you can catch yourself and stop your complaining habit.

How to stop complaining and How to deal with complainers. 

Set boundaries. When you hear someone complain, walk away. Don’t engage, don’t entice, don’t comment. Put as much distance from them as you can. 

Challenge their thinking.  Ask them, “do you feel better now that you said that out loud? What solutions do you think we can bring forth that may present a different outcome or situation?” 

Complaint clock. You get 30 seconds...GO! This creates walls around the complaints, allows the complainer to feel heard without anyone feeding into it. They may also finally get the hint that they are ‘on the clock’ a lot.

Kill them with sunshine and sunflowers. Humor is a great equalizer. 

Decipher the difference between concerns vs. complaints. Concerns are about solving problems, complaints are about pointing blame. 

Ask Yourself What’s the benefit?  How is complaining advancing me towards my goals?

Stand on your head. Challenge yourself to go from a complainer to an examiner. Get curious and see what’s really going on here. 

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EPISODE RESOURCES

The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear and Take Life to the Next Level (book) 

Toxic People (podcast) 

These two words can be taking you down (blog post) 

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