March 19, 2024 • 17 mins
There's a right way and a wrong way to lead after a layoff.
When RIFs shatter company morale and rewrite the organizational chart, people can do really weird and stupid things.
Let's talk through what it means to be a leader after layoffs affect your colleagues emotionally.
My journey through the aftermath of downsizing has taught me invaluable lessons about strengthening a team and leading after a RIF, which I'm happy to share with you.
Leading after a layoff means putting ambition aside, tuning into your team's emotional needs, and leading with a compassionate heart. Putting your team first will show your priorities and help others identify you as a leader people want to follow.
In this episode, you'll hear stories of people who rose the ranks and those who torpedoed their careers.
This episode explores how emotional intelligence can transform your team and your leadership. You'll learn practical ways to support your colleagues, cultivate your leadership qualities, and ultimately become an example that inspires others professionally.
Book a complimentary management coaching conversation at https://calendly.com/catherine-vanderlaan/free-60-minute-leadership-consultation
Email me at catherine@managementmaterialcoaching.com to ask a question or get in touch.
Join our Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/managementmaterialcoaching
Find out more about Management and Leadership Coaching at https://managementmaterialcoaching.com/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Catherine Van Der Laan (00:05):
That leader cares about the people
around them more than they careabout their own aspirational
goals right, more than they careabout their own job.
They look around, they see theneeds for the people around them
and they help the people aroundthem with their needs.
Now, those needs could beemotional, they could be
(00:26):
physical, they could be mental Imean like learning things.
I mean it could be a lot ofdifferent needs.
Those leaders that people wantto follow feel what the people
around them are feeling and helpthem recover when they need to
recover.
If you want to be seen as aleader, that's what you need to
(00:48):
do.
Welcome to Management Material.
My name is Catherine Vanderlaan.
I started my career at thebottom as an assistant and
worked my way up to become theboss's boss in eight years.
And, man, I love management.
Welcome back to ManagementMaterial.
(01:13):
I'm glad you're here.
This is episode 56, where wetalk about how to lead after
your company has experienced alayoff.
Oh, this is a heavy topic.
Right In the last episode, wetalked about what to do if you
were laid off in particular.
This is a different situation.
(01:34):
This is, if your companyexperiences a layoff and you are
not laid off, how do you lead,how do you stand out?
I have seen people try to leadafter a layoff and they get
really, really, really terribleresults, absolutely awful.
And it's because they come outwith a bang, they're celebrating
(01:56):
all these different things,they're really excited about
their job.
I mean, they put on thispersona of Mr or Miss or Miss,
whatever, of Dr, professor, Idon't care of this person who is
very excited about their job,happy to be there, or on the
(02:16):
flip side of things, after alayoff, some people have this
terrible survivor's guilt.
They go into their jobs.
They don't know what to doanymore, they don't know if
their job is secure, if therewill be other rounds of layoffs.
All of these fears come in, allthe survivor guilt comes in.
There's a little bit ofparanoia and people react to
(02:39):
those feelings in all differentways.
People react to it by shuttingdown, staying quiet, huddling in
corners, or they react by beingloud, being loud and seen,
trying to champion somethingafter a layoff has happened and
has rocked a lot of people'svotes.
I want to tell you a story aboutthis individual that I knew in
(03:02):
one of my jobs, who survived alayoff.
Okay, and I oh, that's sodramatic when I say survived a
layoff, but that really is theterm that a lot of people use is
survive a layoff, becausethere's this survivor's guilt.
Anyway, he was known to be alittle bit cutthroat.
He had some growing to do as aperson.
(03:23):
He was a manager, like a littlemini manager.
He had one direct report, Ithink, an assistant, and he
wanted to be promoted.
I mean, you could just feelthat after one conversation he
thought that he was better thanhis job and he wanted to be
promoted.
Now, he wasn't this loud guy,he was usually pretty quiet.
(03:46):
He was a quiet individual, keptto himself, kept his head down
and worked with his team onwhatever projects they were
working on.
Well, after this one round oflayoffs we had it was a
considerable cut Some very lovedcolleagues of ours were laid
off.
He became this totallydifferent person.
(04:07):
He was in everyone's face.
I and I don't mean like yellingor anything, but he was
championing different things.
He was talking about himself.
He was trying to basically fill, fill shoes and take up
whatever opportunity he couldand make sure that everyone knew
that he was the right choicefor the next opportunity.
(04:29):
Well, I don't know if you knowthis, but that's not necessarily
the right thing to do.
Yes, you want to get promoted.
Yes, you want a new opportunity.
Let's talk through how toactually lead after your company
has experienced a layoff, and Iwill finish that story after I
tell you the better way to goabout things and, believe me,
(04:52):
you're going to want to hear therest of the story.
It's a little bit of a shocker,actually.
If you are experiencing alayoff, you have been around,
you have colleagues of yours whohave been laid off and you are
experiencing survivors, guilt orwhat have you all those
emotions that I mentioned.
Please take a step back anddon't disappear, but don't
(05:13):
become a different person either.
Take a step back and thinkoutside yourself and the
opportunities that are presented, because after, after a layoff,
there's usually some sort ofreorganization.
There's usually some sort ofsome moving pieces.
Some people will take that as asign to leave, and so there
will be open opportunities.
But take a step back and realizethat a lot of people have just
(05:35):
been affected.
Just a lot of people havelearned that they're losing
their jobs, or they lost theirjob that day, depending on the
type of layoff and andprocedures that have been
followed.
People are losing theircolleagues that they love to
work with.
People are feeling this, thisshock to their system.
So take a step back and realizethat the situation that you're
(05:58):
in is bigger than you.
It is affecting the peoplearound you and in order to lead
and become a leader that peoplewant to follow, you need to lead
with empathy and compassion.
Now, empathy is the ability tofeel what other people are
feeling, and compassion istaking it one step further.
(06:19):
It is doing something about it.
The leader that people reallywant to follow, somebody that
people look to, whether they'rein a position of authority or
not, whether they demand otherpeople's jobs or they don't have
firing and firing abilitiesthat leader cares about the
(06:41):
people around them more thanthey care about their own
aspirational goals, right, morethan they care about their own
job.
They look around, they see theneeds for the people around them
and they help the people aroundthem with their needs.
Now, those needs could beemotional, they could be
physical, they could be mental Imean like learning things.
(07:02):
I mean it could be a lot ofdifferent needs.
Those leaders that people wantto follow feel what the people
around them are feeling and helpthem recover when they need to
recover If you want to be seenas a leader, that's what you
need to do.
You can think about your ownaspirational goals.
(07:25):
Later you can get to it.
You can become the director.
You can probably fill some greatshoes if you have the skills,
if you have the leadershipskills.
If you have the skills, if youhave the leadership capabilities
, if you have the communicationskills.
I mean there are a lot ofskills that it takes to become a
manager.
And if you are looking todevelop those skills, come join
my leadership group coachingprogram.
(07:46):
We do a workshop in the first30 minutes and then in the
second 30 minutes we dosituational coaching.
If you are looking to developthose skills and you don't want
to go get an MBA and I'll tellyou right now, an MBA is not
going to give you those skillsbut if you want those skills,
come join my program.
I have a link down below toschedule a 30 minute phone call
(08:09):
Well, it's a Zoom meeting withme to figure out if that is your
best way forward.
So it's open to a lot of people.
I do screen, I mean that's whywe have that 30 minute Zoom
meeting.
Anyway, if you are looking toleave, maybe you are a manager,
maybe you're not a manager andyou want to be, or maybe you
(08:31):
just want to be a better leader.
Then start with empathy andcompassion.
Don't try to fill in the gaps.
Let's not be super tacticalright away.
Start with acknowledging otherpeople's emotions, asking them
what they need in order to cope,in order to get through the
(08:55):
next day or two or week.
Tell them to please take careof themselves and, if they need
anything, to send you an email,to slap you to whatever text
call.
I don't know how you guys dothings at your company but help
them.
Help them.
That's the whole point here.
That's it.
That is the entire podcast.
Start with the emotions andthen you can get to the tactical
(09:18):
adjusting to the loss of role.
I've been through a lot oflayoffs.
I mean, heck, I was in thepublishing industry and then I
was in, like publishing needstechnology.
We had a ton of layoffs.
The industry was changing justimmensely while I was there and
I knew it.
I knew it was going to happen.
We had acquisitions, we haddivestitures.
We had a attempted and failedmerger.
(09:41):
I was part of a lot of thoseteams.
I even assessed companies foracquisitions.
If you're in that position wheresomebody or a team of people,
or people within a bunch ofteams have been.
Let go lead with compassionfirst, then get to the tactical.
What do we do about it?
Don't become loud when you'renot usually loud.
(10:03):
Don't become a look at meperson.
Don't become quiet andwithdrawn, because that's not
going to help you either.
That's not a leader.
Go find the needs emotional ornot, and help people fill them
in.
Okay, one of the major thingsthat I hear when I'm coaching
somebody through this they needto be a little bit more
(10:23):
empathetic.
They need to be a higheremotional IQ, a higher EQ.
Right that they just don't knowwhat people need.
They don't know, they don'tknow, and that's okay, that's
all right.
I mean, it is a skill todevelop an EQ.
Some people are born with it,like my daughter who, oh, my
goodness, if she could be anyless dramatic, I'd be excited.
(10:46):
If she could be less emotional,I'd be excited.
But she's also really sensitiveand she understands the
emotions of the people aroundher.
Now, not 100% of the time,definitely not.
She's only eight and a half,almost nine but I feel like she
was born with this reallysensitive EQ since birth.
I don't know why my son is notlike that, I don't know, anyway.
(11:08):
So if you are not a natural highEQ kind of person, start
observing people's facialpatterns.
Ask them how they're feeling.
Asking goes a long way.
You might not be able to senseit and get it intuitively.
Asking about it is going tohelp a lot.
So go, ask some questions in asensitive way.
(11:30):
Don't be like, hey, how are youfeeling?
You know, cindy was just likego, what are you thinking?
No, no, no, no.
Ask nicely.
So bottom line here.
Take care of the people aroundyou.
That's what leaders do.
And if you want to learn how tobe a better leader, develop
your emotional intelligence,develop your communication
(11:52):
skills, figure out how to be aleader that people want to
follow, come join my groupprogram.
I'm very excited.
You can start in the middle.
Every single workshop is like adifferent modular thing.
I have about 20 of them.
There's unlimited sessions,though.
Well, we meet once a week, butcome once a week it's at about
(12:13):
lunchtime for almost everybodyin the United States, which is
impossible, but it's aroundthere.
I almost forgot to finish mystory.
So this guy who had become thisloud person, who was the first
to speak up in every meeting,suddenly who saw an opportunity.
(12:34):
That's my opinion of whathappened.
He saw an opportunity that hewanted to take.
There was an open position.
There were promotions that werepotentially able to be gotten.
He saw his opportunity andbecame this loud, obnoxious
person.
He ignored everyone's emotionaloutput.
He did not take care of peoplelike we were just talking about.
(12:56):
He was not compassionate.
He did not want to talk aboutemotions at all, which is not a
requirement in the workplace.
But if you are a leader, you'regoing to run into a lot of
people's emotions.
He wanted that leadership role.
He did, but he was unwilling tobe a compassionate leader, to
be empathetic in any waywhatsoever.
(13:19):
He was very, very me first andhey, I'm a D in the disc world.
I am a red when it comes tomotivate.
I'm actually red blue when itcomes to motivation, which means
that I'm motivated by thesuccess of the people around me.
But I used to be a redmotivated by my own success, and
he was square in there,motivated by his own success, to
(13:39):
the detriment of the peoplearound him.
So here's what happened.
His actions were noticed.
The management team understoodwhat was happening.
They actually had a defaulthappen at the same time where
somebody in management was notterribly empathetic himself and
he learned about it by manypeople and this guy ended up
(14:04):
getting fired, actually, at theend of it.
He was going for all of thesedifferent things.
He got some bad reports fromthe people around him.
I'm just trying not to give youtoo many details because I
don't want to be sued.
He ended up getting in so overhis head when it came to
speaking up in meetings, when itcame to changing his
(14:25):
personality, basically in theworkplace and not being
empathetic, that many people onhis team started not wanting to
work with him.
When you are not empatheticafter a major emotional event
has happened, you are seen asnot a leader.
You are seen as somebody who isme first and a look at me kind
of person.
Thank you, and the people onhis team started finding
(14:50):
projects elsewhere.
They started leaving and itlooked really bad for him.
If the people who worked veryclosely to you start leaving, it
reflects badly on you.
So even if you're not theirdirect supervisor, it reflects
badly on you, especially whenthey're saying things like this
(15:11):
person was not sensitive.
This person said this thing andit rubbed me the wrong way,
especially when he's beingreported.
So he got reported by thepeople on his team just for
being insensitive, andeventually, after a few months,
I believe, he was put on aperformance improvement plan and
taught to be more of a leader.
But he didn't want to be thatleader, the leader that the
(15:34):
organization wanted, the leaderthat emphasized emotional
availability.
He didn't want to be that, andso eventually he actually got
fired and I don't mean let go, Imean fired for a lack of
empathy.
Now, very, very few companiesare gonna fire people for a lack
of empathy.
Most companies fire people whenthey've done something really
(15:56):
egregious or they're just notfulfilling the needs of the role
.
After this company had such aweird emotional guffaw happen on
the executive level, theystarted noticing when people
that they put in leadershippositions had a lack of empathy
and compassion for their teamsand they started noticing the
(16:19):
impact that it had on thoseteams.
So at the time that he was fired, I was actually promoted into a
larger leadership role and hehated me.
Oh my goodness, he reallydidn't like me.
He did a few things that showedme who he was and showed me how
much he didn't like me, and soit was very obvious that he
absolutely despised me.
But whatever, I didn't reallycare.
(16:40):
I was believe it or not helpinghis team, and some of them
asked to be placed on my team.
So maybe that was it, maybethat's why he didn't like me.
But anyway, I didn't do that onpurpose.
I didn't do that to get him.
I just did that because I sawneeds that people had and I
tried to help them.
Anyway, that's what happened tothis individual and please
(17:02):
learn a lesson.
Please learn a lesson Do not belike him.
Be available emotionally, beempathetic, be compassionate.
Put the emotional health of theperson who's around you first
and then get to the tactical.
What do we do about this?
Okay, if you take those twosteps, you will be seen as a
(17:24):
leader people want to follow.
Go ahead and hit that call toaction button down at the bottom
.
If you're in marketing, youknow what I mean.
Go ahead and schedule a little30 minute session with me down
below.
We'll get you into whateverprogram that you need to become
the leader people want to follow.
I'm excited to help you.
Until then, I'll see you in thenext episode.
That leader cares about the people
around them more than they careabout their own aspirational
goals right, more than they careabout their own job.
They look around, they see theneeds for the people around them
and they help the people aroundthem with their needs.
Now, those needs could beemotional, they could be
(00:26):
physical, they could be mental Imean like learning things.
I mean it could be a lot ofdifferent needs.
Those leaders that people wantto follow feel what the people
around them are feeling and helpthem recover when they need to
recover.
If you want to be seen as aleader, that's what you need to
(00:48):
do.
Welcome to Management Material.
My name is Catherine Vanderlaan.
I started my career at thebottom as an assistant and
worked my way up to become theboss's boss in eight years.
And, man, I love management.
Welcome back to ManagementMaterial.
(01:13):
I'm glad you're here.
This is episode 56, where wetalk about how to lead after
your company has experienced alayoff.
Oh, this is a heavy topic.
Right In the last episode, wetalked about what to do if you
were laid off in particular.
This is a different situation.
(01:34):
This is, if your companyexperiences a layoff and you are
not laid off, how do you lead,how do you stand out?
I have seen people try to leadafter a layoff and they get
really, really, really terribleresults, absolutely awful.
And it's because they come outwith a bang, they're celebrating
(01:56):
all these different things,they're really excited about
their job.
I mean, they put on thispersona of Mr or Miss or Miss,
whatever, of Dr, professor, Idon't care of this person who is
very excited about their job,happy to be there, or on the
(02:16):
flip side of things, after alayoff, some people have this
terrible survivor's guilt.
They go into their jobs.
They don't know what to doanymore, they don't know if
their job is secure, if therewill be other rounds of layoffs.
All of these fears come in, allthe survivor guilt comes in.
There's a little bit ofparanoia and people react to
(02:39):
those feelings in all differentways.
People react to it by shuttingdown, staying quiet, huddling in
corners, or they react by beingloud, being loud and seen,
trying to champion somethingafter a layoff has happened and
has rocked a lot of people'svotes.
I want to tell you a story aboutthis individual that I knew in
(03:02):
one of my jobs, who survived alayoff.
Okay, and I oh, that's sodramatic when I say survived a
layoff, but that really is theterm that a lot of people use is
survive a layoff, becausethere's this survivor's guilt.
Anyway, he was known to be alittle bit cutthroat.
He had some growing to do as aperson.
(03:23):
He was a manager, like a littlemini manager.
He had one direct report, Ithink, an assistant, and he
wanted to be promoted.
I mean, you could just feelthat after one conversation he
thought that he was better thanhis job and he wanted to be
promoted.
Now, he wasn't this loud guy,he was usually pretty quiet.
(03:46):
He was a quiet individual, keptto himself, kept his head down
and worked with his team onwhatever projects they were
working on.
Well, after this one round oflayoffs we had it was a
considerable cut Some very lovedcolleagues of ours were laid
off.
He became this totallydifferent person.
(04:07):
He was in everyone's face.
I and I don't mean like yellingor anything, but he was
championing different things.
He was talking about himself.
He was trying to basically fill, fill shoes and take up
whatever opportunity he couldand make sure that everyone knew
that he was the right choicefor the next opportunity.
(04:29):
Well, I don't know if you knowthis, but that's not necessarily
the right thing to do.
Yes, you want to get promoted.
Yes, you want a new opportunity.
Let's talk through how toactually lead after your company
has experienced a layoff, and Iwill finish that story after I
tell you the better way to goabout things and, believe me,
(04:52):
you're going to want to hear therest of the story.
It's a little bit of a shocker,actually.
If you are experiencing alayoff, you have been around,
you have colleagues of yours whohave been laid off and you are
experiencing survivors, guilt orwhat have you all those
emotions that I mentioned.
Please take a step back anddon't disappear, but don't
(05:13):
become a different person either.
Take a step back and thinkoutside yourself and the
opportunities that are presented, because after, after a layoff,
there's usually some sort ofreorganization.
There's usually some sort ofsome moving pieces.
Some people will take that as asign to leave, and so there
will be open opportunities.
But take a step back and realizethat a lot of people have just
(05:35):
been affected.
Just a lot of people havelearned that they're losing
their jobs, or they lost theirjob that day, depending on the
type of layoff and andprocedures that have been
followed.
People are losing theircolleagues that they love to
work with.
People are feeling this, thisshock to their system.
So take a step back and realizethat the situation that you're
(05:58):
in is bigger than you.
It is affecting the peoplearound you and in order to lead
and become a leader that peoplewant to follow, you need to lead
with empathy and compassion.
Now, empathy is the ability tofeel what other people are
feeling, and compassion istaking it one step further.
(06:19):
It is doing something about it.
The leader that people reallywant to follow, somebody that
people look to, whether they'rein a position of authority or
not, whether they demand otherpeople's jobs or they don't have
firing and firing abilitiesthat leader cares about the
(06:41):
people around them more thanthey care about their own
aspirational goals, right, morethan they care about their own
job.
They look around, they see theneeds for the people around them
and they help the people aroundthem with their needs.
Now, those needs could beemotional, they could be
physical, they could be mental Imean like learning things.
(07:02):
I mean it could be a lot ofdifferent needs.
Those leaders that people wantto follow feel what the people
around them are feeling and helpthem recover when they need to
recover If you want to be seenas a leader, that's what you
need to do.
You can think about your ownaspirational goals.
(07:25):
Later you can get to it.
You can become the director.
You can probably fill some greatshoes if you have the skills,
if you have the leadershipskills.
If you have the skills, if youhave the leadership capabilities
, if you have the communicationskills.
I mean there are a lot ofskills that it takes to become a
manager.
And if you are looking todevelop those skills, come join
my leadership group coachingprogram.
(07:46):
We do a workshop in the first30 minutes and then in the
second 30 minutes we dosituational coaching.
If you are looking to developthose skills and you don't want
to go get an MBA and I'll tellyou right now, an MBA is not
going to give you those skillsbut if you want those skills,
come join my program.
I have a link down below toschedule a 30 minute phone call
(08:09):
Well, it's a Zoom meeting withme to figure out if that is your
best way forward.
So it's open to a lot of people.
I do screen, I mean that's whywe have that 30 minute Zoom
meeting.
Anyway, if you are looking toleave, maybe you are a manager,
maybe you're not a manager andyou want to be, or maybe you
(08:31):
just want to be a better leader.
Then start with empathy andcompassion.
Don't try to fill in the gaps.
Let's not be super tacticalright away.
Start with acknowledging otherpeople's emotions, asking them
what they need in order to cope,in order to get through the
(08:55):
next day or two or week.
Tell them to please take careof themselves and, if they need
anything, to send you an email,to slap you to whatever text
call.
I don't know how you guys dothings at your company but help
them.
Help them.
That's the whole point here.
That's it.
That is the entire podcast.
Start with the emotions andthen you can get to the tactical
(09:18):
adjusting to the loss of role.
I've been through a lot oflayoffs.
I mean, heck, I was in thepublishing industry and then I
was in, like publishing needstechnology.
We had a ton of layoffs.
The industry was changing justimmensely while I was there and
I knew it.
I knew it was going to happen.
We had acquisitions, we haddivestitures.
We had a attempted and failedmerger.
(09:41):
I was part of a lot of thoseteams.
I even assessed companies foracquisitions.
If you're in that position wheresomebody or a team of people,
or people within a bunch ofteams have been.
Let go lead with compassionfirst, then get to the tactical.
What do we do about it?
Don't become loud when you'renot usually loud.
(10:03):
Don't become a look at meperson.
Don't become quiet andwithdrawn, because that's not
going to help you either.
That's not a leader.
Go find the needs emotional ornot, and help people fill them
in.
Okay, one of the major thingsthat I hear when I'm coaching
somebody through this they needto be a little bit more
(10:23):
empathetic.
They need to be a higheremotional IQ, a higher EQ.
Right that they just don't knowwhat people need.
They don't know, they don'tknow, and that's okay, that's
all right.
I mean, it is a skill todevelop an EQ.
Some people are born with it,like my daughter who, oh, my
goodness, if she could be anyless dramatic, I'd be excited.
(10:46):
If she could be less emotional,I'd be excited.
But she's also really sensitiveand she understands the
emotions of the people aroundher.
Now, not 100% of the time,definitely not.
She's only eight and a half,almost nine but I feel like she
was born with this reallysensitive EQ since birth.
I don't know why my son is notlike that, I don't know, anyway.
(11:08):
So if you are not a natural highEQ kind of person, start
observing people's facialpatterns.
Ask them how they're feeling.
Asking goes a long way.
You might not be able to senseit and get it intuitively.
Asking about it is going tohelp a lot.
So go, ask some questions in asensitive way.
(11:30):
Don't be like, hey, how are youfeeling?
You know, cindy was just likego, what are you thinking?
No, no, no, no.
Ask nicely.
So bottom line here.
Take care of the people aroundyou.
That's what leaders do.
And if you want to learn how tobe a better leader, develop
your emotional intelligence,develop your communication
(11:52):
skills, figure out how to be aleader that people want to
follow, come join my groupprogram.
I'm very excited.
You can start in the middle.
Every single workshop is like adifferent modular thing.
I have about 20 of them.
There's unlimited sessions,though.
Well, we meet once a week, butcome once a week it's at about
(12:13):
lunchtime for almost everybodyin the United States, which is
impossible, but it's aroundthere.
I almost forgot to finish mystory.
So this guy who had become thisloud person, who was the first
to speak up in every meeting,suddenly who saw an opportunity.
(12:34):
That's my opinion of whathappened.
He saw an opportunity that hewanted to take.
There was an open position.
There were promotions that werepotentially able to be gotten.
He saw his opportunity andbecame this loud, obnoxious
person.
He ignored everyone's emotionaloutput.
He did not take care of peoplelike we were just talking about.
(12:56):
He was not compassionate.
He did not want to talk aboutemotions at all, which is not a
requirement in the workplace.
But if you are a leader, you'regoing to run into a lot of
people's emotions.
He wanted that leadership role.
He did, but he was unwilling tobe a compassionate leader, to
be empathetic in any waywhatsoever.
(13:19):
He was very, very me first andhey, I'm a D in the disc world.
I am a red when it comes tomotivate.
I'm actually red blue when itcomes to motivation, which means
that I'm motivated by thesuccess of the people around me.
But I used to be a redmotivated by my own success, and
he was square in there,motivated by his own success, to
(13:39):
the detriment of the peoplearound him.
So here's what happened.
His actions were noticed.
The management team understoodwhat was happening.
They actually had a defaulthappen at the same time where
somebody in management was notterribly empathetic himself and
he learned about it by manypeople and this guy ended up
(14:04):
getting fired, actually, at theend of it.
He was going for all of thesedifferent things.
He got some bad reports fromthe people around him.
I'm just trying not to give youtoo many details because I
don't want to be sued.
He ended up getting in so overhis head when it came to
speaking up in meetings, when itcame to changing his
(14:25):
personality, basically in theworkplace and not being
empathetic, that many people onhis team started not wanting to
work with him.
When you are not empatheticafter a major emotional event
has happened, you are seen asnot a leader.
You are seen as somebody who isme first and a look at me kind
of person.
Thank you, and the people onhis team started finding
(14:50):
projects elsewhere.
They started leaving and itlooked really bad for him.
If the people who worked veryclosely to you start leaving, it
reflects badly on you.
So even if you're not theirdirect supervisor, it reflects
badly on you, especially whenthey're saying things like this
(15:11):
person was not sensitive.
This person said this thing andit rubbed me the wrong way,
especially when he's beingreported.
So he got reported by thepeople on his team just for
being insensitive, andeventually, after a few months,
I believe, he was put on aperformance improvement plan and
taught to be more of a leader.
But he didn't want to be thatleader, the leader that the
(15:34):
organization wanted, the leaderthat emphasized emotional
availability.
He didn't want to be that, andso eventually he actually got
fired and I don't mean let go, Imean fired for a lack of
empathy.
Now, very, very few companiesare gonna fire people for a lack
of empathy.
Most companies fire people whenthey've done something really
(15:56):
egregious or they're just notfulfilling the needs of the role
.
After this company had such aweird emotional guffaw happen on
the executive level, theystarted noticing when people
that they put in leadershippositions had a lack of empathy
and compassion for their teamsand they started noticing the
(16:19):
impact that it had on thoseteams.
So at the time that he was fired, I was actually promoted into a
larger leadership role and hehated me.
Oh my goodness, he reallydidn't like me.
He did a few things that showedme who he was and showed me how
much he didn't like me, and soit was very obvious that he
absolutely despised me.
But whatever, I didn't reallycare.
(16:40):
I was believe it or not helpinghis team, and some of them
asked to be placed on my team.
So maybe that was it, maybethat's why he didn't like me.
But anyway, I didn't do that onpurpose.
I didn't do that to get him.
I just did that because I sawneeds that people had and I
tried to help them.
Anyway, that's what happened tothis individual and please
(17:02):
learn a lesson.
Please learn a lesson Do not belike him.
Be available emotionally, beempathetic, be compassionate.
Put the emotional health of theperson who's around you first
and then get to the tactical.
What do we do about this?
Okay, if you take those twosteps, you will be seen as a
(17:24):
leader people want to follow.
Go ahead and hit that call toaction button down at the bottom
.
If you're in marketing, youknow what I mean.
Go ahead and schedule a little30 minute session with me down
below.
We'll get you into whateverprogram that you need to become
the leader people want to follow.
I'm excited to help you.
Until then, I'll see you in thenext episode.
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