December 16, 2025 • 17 mins
Feeling overwhelmed by the Christmas season? Between finances, family, food, and endless commitments, the holidays can leave men drained instead of joyful. In this episode, Don shares practical and heartfelt ways to slow down, simplify, and rediscover real peace this Christmas.
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Question for You
What’s one thing you’re going to do over the next 10 days to remove some stress from your Christmas season and bring back peace? Comment below — your answer could help another man do the same.
⏰ TIMECODES
00:00 Introduction: Finding Peace During Christmas
00:32 Understanding Men's Holiday Stress
01:56 Major Stressors: Finances and Weight Gain
03:37 Family Dynamics and Grief
06:37 Practical Tips to Reduce Holiday Stress
12:51 Sharing the Load and Seeking Support
15:25 Conclusion: Embracing Joy and Peace
HASHTAGS
#ManhoodTribes #MensGrowth #HolidayStress #ChristmasPeace #MensMentalHealth
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Don Ross (00:01):
Men we're getting close to Christmas, and if
you're wondering where all thepeace and joy of the Christmas
season has gone, you're probablynot alone.
If the most wonderful time ofthe year has become the most
stressful time of year for you,that's because it is for a lot
of us.
Today on the Manhood Tribe Show,I want us to talk about how you
can salvage a little bit ofpeace in these remaining few
(00:24):
weeks of the year.
So let's dive into that today.
My name's Don.
I'm really glad that you're heretoday on The Manhood Tribe Show.
It's Christmas time and so we'respending a few weeks just
talking about men and how wedeal with the holidays because
we can sometimes forget that asmen, there are some certain
like.
Expectations and stressors thatwe, in particular as men tend to
(00:48):
experience during this holidayseason.
We can kind of get wrapped up inthe fact that the holidays feel
like they're really about familyand often about kids, and that
as men, we kind of take abackseat role in a lot of the
planning and a lot of theactivities.
And so because of that, we tendto ignore a lot of what actually
goes on for us around theholidays.
(01:09):
But in doing that.
It can actually become a seasonof incredible stress for us as
men.
If you're feeling like theChristmas season is just a big
ball of anxiety for you, thenjust know for starters that
you're not alone.
It is for a lot of men.
But today we want to try to talkabout what do we actually do
(01:29):
about that?
We're a little more than a weekout from Christmas if you're
watching this episode on the daythat it comes out.
And I wanna try to help you withjust a few pointers on what you
can do to salvage a little bitof peace during this Christmas
season.
All right, but to do that, weneed to start off by talking
(01:49):
about what are some of the bigthings that cause men stress
during the holiday season?
Now one of the first ones issomething that we actually
talked about in last week'sepisode, which is finances,
right?
We can very quickly get stressedout by how much we're gonna blow
this year's Christmas budget,right?
How much we're gonna likely gointo debt with all of the things
(02:11):
we're spending money on, whetherthat's gifts or parties, or
travel, or you name it.
Christmas can be an incrediblystressful season financially.
So if that's you, I want toencourage you to go back and
watch last week's episode to geta little more insight on the
whole area of finances inparticular.
But apart from finances, there'sa whole lot of other stressors
(02:33):
that go on around the Christmasseason as well.
One big one that we as men don'toften talk about is just the
whole idea of weight gain.
Christmas is a season of.
Eating.
Let's be honest.
That's what, that's one of thethings that we most enjoy about
it.
There's all kinds of good foodavailable during Christmas time
and that's great.
That makes for really greatparties.
(02:54):
It makes for fun atmospheres inthe workplace, like all kinds of
places where food is available.
There's specialty drinks at allyour coffee shops that you like
to go.
There's all kinds of treats thatbecome available at the, you
know, dessert stores.
Like, there's just all kinds ofthings that happen at Christmas
food wise that cause us to.
Eat a lot more than we normallywould, and that leads to weight
(03:16):
gain.
We take in a lot more caloriesthan we typically burn off, but
a lot of guys go into theholiday season knowing that
weight gain is probably coming,and just the anxiety of that
causes a lot of stress.
It can cause dread over theChristmas season instead of joy,
which is what it's reallysupposed to be about.
So weight gain can be a big one.
(03:37):
Another one can just be familydynamics, whether that's your
wife and kids, or more likelyyour extended family.
All of the expectations thatcome from family dynamics around
Christmas time can make thingsreally, really difficult.
Whose house are we supposed tospend time at this year?
Who are we supposed to be buyinggifts for?
(03:58):
What are we supposed to be doingto make sure that they're happy
and that she's happy and that weare happy and everybody feels
good about the commitments thatwe've fulfilled this Christmas
season?
If you come from, uh, a divorcedor broken family, you've got
multiple sets of expectationsthat you're trying to be able to
fulfill, and all of that can getsuper complicated around
(04:18):
Christmas.
So there are lots of stresseswhen it comes to family dynamics
and relationships there whereyou're trying to.
Not only just keep the peace,but actually experience all
those people in a way thatreally does feel fun and
enlivening and actually bringsjoy.
Not just causes stress, but thethought of having to organize
(04:39):
all that and orchestrate all ofit and dance around the topics
that you don't want to talkabout at the Christmas party
because you know it's gonna openup a can of worms.
Like all of those things canjust add to the big pile of
stress and to make it reallydifficult.
To look forward to spending timewith the family members that you
do want to see.
(05:00):
Another point of stress canactually be grief.
Sometimes if you've experiencedany kind of loss in your family
or close friends, the traditionsof Christmas time and the
holidays can just highlight thegrief, can highlight the loss
that you're experiencing, thatthat person is no longer there
to be able to share in thethings that you once shared in,
(05:22):
that you cared about and didtogether, and that you no longer
get to experience together withthem.
That can be super hard.
It can feel very lonely.
It can feel very stressful.
It can feel very sad, and all ofthat adds to the stress and the
difficulty of the Christmasseason.
And even can, like I mentionedbefore, can contribute to that
(05:42):
sense of dread of not wanting togo through the Christmas season
because of the pain that youknow it's going to involve.
So, okay.
So those are some of the bigones, but honestly, there can be
all sorts of Christmasstressors.
Your schedule might just feeltoo full.
You've got too many parties,whether it's family parties or
work parties, or friend parties,or neighborhood parties, or you
(06:05):
know, whatever.
You've just got too many thingsthat you have to go to.
Your kids are involved inthings, your community's
involved in, things your churchis doing, things.
There's just so much going onthat it can only.
Add to the amount of stress thatyou're experiencing when all of
those things taken by themselvesprobably would be fun.
But when you pack that much funinto an already overloaded
(06:26):
schedule, it actually becomesmore stress than it is fun.
So there can be lots and lots ofthings that can contribute to
your stress around the Christmasseason.
So, okay, what do you do aboutit?
Then?
Here we are, you know, not toofar out from Christmas.
Is it too late to be able toactually redeem the season and
to find a little bit of peace?
(06:47):
I don't think that it is, butthere are a few things that you
need to try to do.
The first is that you need toname your stress, all right?
You need to actually maybe evenwrite down the things that are
causing you the most stress, orhave already caused you the most
stress.
So maybe it has been an overlyfull schedule.
(07:07):
Maybe it has been what you'vespent on gifts so far, but also
what you know is still coming interms of travel or other
expenses that you have upcoming.
You need to write down thethings that are actually causing
you the most stress so that youcan start to formulate a plan on
how you're going to be able toaddress those things and create
(07:28):
for yourself some opportunitiesand some moments for some peace.
The next thing that you're gonnaneed to do is you're just going
to have to simplify.
I know it sounds hard.
Simplifying around the Christmasseason inevitably means cutting
some things.
It means like getting rid ofsome things, whether that's
(07:49):
added expenses, whether that'sadded parties, whether that's
added food, whatever it means,it does mean you're gonna
probably have to cut some thingsout.
But the way to do that is not tojust like randomly hack and
slash at your schedule or atyour party engagement or at the
calories that you're taking in.
It's to actually think aboutwhen and where are the places
(08:11):
that you're going to be able toexperience the most joy.
What of all of that stuff thatcould be causing stress that if
you took those thingsindividually and said.
Is this thing actually gonnabring me joy?
Is this thing going to bring mepeace?
Are these are the things that Iwould actually want to do?
Or are these things that I feelobligated to do?
(08:32):
The things that you feelobligated to do are the ones
that you try.
You need to try to eliminate.
As much as you possibly can.
I know there may not be everypossibility of eliminating
obligations.
You've got a family member'sparty that you just absolutely
have to show up to, or you'regonna be hearing about it all
year long, and the grief of thatis not worth the pain that you
have to endure by actuallyshowing up to the party.
(08:53):
Okay, I get it.
But inevitably, there are somethings that you could skip out,
and so it's time to justactually sit down and figure out
what those things are.
You might.
Disappoint some folks.
You might have to say no to awork function that you would
actually like to attend, butit's just not gonna be worth it
in light of the other thingsthat you want to do, or you may
(09:14):
have to miss out on a friend'sparty and you really value that
friendship and would like toshow up for them.
But there's probably ways in thenew year beyond the Christmas
season that you can show up andmaintain that relationship with
those friends that don't involvehaving to just go to one more
party during the Christmasseason.
So there's ways to be able tocut those things out.
When it comes to food and toweight gain in particular, it's
(09:36):
worth thinking about where isthe excess food really coming
from?
Is it coming from too manydinners out?
Is it coming from parties?
Is it coming from lots of extrafood that you have around your
house?
Do you have a whole bunch offriends and family that send you
food and so you just get stuckwith all this stuff that you
don't know what to do with.
If that's the case, then likesome of it may actually be stuff
(09:57):
that you could like.
Re-gift.
If you've got somenon-perishable things or some
package things that come yourway, consider like donating them
to some other localorganization.
Take them to a police station ora fire station.
Take them to a church or schooloffice as a way of just saying
thank you and showing yourappreciation to those people,
and then you're not wasting thefood, but you are getting it out
(10:20):
of your reach and cutting someof those extra calories out of
your life.
If it's just coming from goingto too many parties, then hey,
kill two birds with one stone.
Figure out which parties youdefinitely would like to be at
and cut some of the rest.
And then not only have you cutthe stress of the overactivity,
you've cut the stress of theover calories as well and manage
(10:42):
to really be able to steal backsome joy and some peace in your
schedule.
You've got about 10 days beforeChristmas arrives, and usually
these are the busiest days andthe time that's most full of all
of the Christmas stressors.
So find ways of being able toclear up some of that time over
the next 10 days and really makeroom for the peace and joy that
(11:02):
you want to have so that by thetime you get to the new year,
you're actually feeling goodabout how you spent the holiday
season.
Or maybe you feel like you hadto miss out on something, but by
the end of January you're noteven gonna remember that you
did.
You also might just be able tolook forward to the coming New
Year's season and recognize thathey, maybe the month of December
(11:25):
is a little bit more of a timeof indulgence, and the month of
January is a little bit more ofa time of.
Pulling back of, you can call itretreating or you can call it
fasting, or you can call itwhatever you need to as a way of
being able to just take a breakfrom the indulgence that you
experienced in December.
Now, for some people that's likeway easier said than done, and
(11:47):
so that may not be the rightstrategy for you.
Things like dry January or aweekend fast or some of these
different opportunities.
Uh, even if you're familiar withthe Scandinavian tradition of
Haga, which is just kind ofthis.
Like retreating inwards a littlebit, just spending more time
indoors and trying to makethings as cozy as possible
(12:08):
without overindulging, justsimplifying, but making things
cozy and enjoyable.
Those are great opportunitiesand ways to be able to take
advantage of kind of a pulledback season and January that can
help, uh, reduce whatever youkind of overdid in December.
So it just creates some balance.
And then you can recognizeDecember is a season for joy,
(12:30):
and one of the ways that I'mgonna enjoy it is I'm not gonna
worry too much aboutoverindulging because I know
that in January I'm actuallygonna get benefit and peace out
of the fact that I'm gonna pullback in some of those areas.
So all of that can be ways tosort of help yourself be able to
figure out how are you gonnamanage the season without having
to deal with all of that stress.
(12:51):
Another way of really makingsure that this happens is you
just got to share the weight ofthe stress of this season,
whether that's with your spouseor your girlfriend, or
especially with your tribe.
This is the best thing to beable to do, is to just talk with
somebody else about, Hey, I'mreally feeling some stress
about, you know, fill in theblank.
(13:12):
Whatever it is for you thisseason that you are concerned
about, that you're worriedabout, that you think might
actually cause you someproblems.
Own up to it with somebody else.
That's one of the best ways tojust have an easy conversation
and get a little bit ofaccountability and some help in
being able to know, here are thestrategies that I need to do to
be able to weather this season,and I've actually got somebody
(13:33):
else in my corner that's gonnahelp me be able to do it.
That's what a tribe is for.
That's what your family shouldbe for as well.
But whoever it is, talk tosomebody else and be able to
work those things out.
Now, if you're dealing withChristmas as a season of grief,
that can be especially hard, andthis is again, where talking
with someone can be really,really beneficial.
(13:54):
That might be a pastor, thatmight be a close friend, that
might be a therapist, again,might be your your wife or your
girlfriend.
In some capacity, you've justgot to be present to another
person with your grief.
You've got to allow that side ofyou to come to the surface so
that you can experience it andheal.
You don't heal by keeping itstuffed down.
(14:16):
You've got to bring it into thelight so that it doesn't
continue to be something thatfesters in the dark.
And in doing that.
You probably are going toexperience some pain, but in
experiencing that pain,especially with someone else,
you start to bring healing tothat place of pain so that it's
not as painful again in thefuture, and you leave room for
(14:37):
joy to come back into your lifeas you move forward instead of
just creating scar tissue overthat place in your heart that
continues to ache and to festerand to cause you difficulty as
you move forward in life.
So do what you can there.
Now, if Christmas is just one ofthose seasons that is really,
really tough for you and ittriggers a whole bunch of
(14:58):
things, then I would love to letyou know a little bit more about
my one-on-one and group coachingprogram called Victorious Man
Coaching.
If you would like some helpbeing able to get out of.
A pit of a place that you havefound yourself into and
Christmas is just seeming tomake it worse.
If that's you and you'd beinterested in talking to
somebody about that, shoot me anemail at info@manhoodtribes.com
(15:21):
and let's see if my coachingprogram might be a good fit for
you.
Now as you move through the restof this Christmas and New Year's
season, I want you to thinkabout what it would look like to
be able to experience all ofthat.
Not with stress and anxiety, butwith.
Genuine joy with moments of realpeace and with a sense of moving
(15:44):
into the new year knowing thatyou did this season well without
any regrets, man, that would bean incredible feeling.
That would be the kind ofChristmas that we really all
long for.
Right?
That's the Hallmark card kind ofChristmas.
That's the, that's theexperience that we're really.
Hoping that Christmas can be forus, but putting into place the
(16:05):
things that you need in order tobe able to make Christmas that
way probably isn't going tohappen by accident.
You're going to have to beintentional to be able to avoid
some of those major stressors,and you're gonna have to be able
to take some specific steps tohelp you enjoy it in that kind
of way.
And if you do, you really canexperience the kind of Christmas
(16:27):
season that you would like tohave.
Not isolated, not frustrated,not full of stress, anxiety, and
regret, but full of peace andjoy and wonder, and a hopeful
outlook on the year to come.
And with that in mind, I wouldlove for you to engage in the
comments below and let me knowwhat's one thing that you're
(16:48):
gonna try to do over the next 10days to be able to remove some
stress from your Christmasseason and make it something
more that you can enjoy.
All right, man.
I hope you got some value out ofthis today and, uh, we'll have
one more episode that comes outbefore Christmas and I'm looking
forward to celebrating that withyou as well.
And in the meantime, doeverything you can to help make
(17:09):
this Christmas season a greatone for you, for your loved
ones, for your family, and forwhoever you're celebrating with.
Thanks, and I look forward toseeing you next time.
Men we're getting close to Christmas, and if
you're wondering where all thepeace and joy of the Christmas
season has gone, you're probablynot alone.
If the most wonderful time ofthe year has become the most
stressful time of year for you,that's because it is for a lot
of us.
Today on the Manhood Tribe Show,I want us to talk about how you
can salvage a little bit ofpeace in these remaining few
(00:24):
weeks of the year.
So let's dive into that today.
My name's Don.
I'm really glad that you're heretoday on The Manhood Tribe Show.
It's Christmas time and so we'respending a few weeks just
talking about men and how wedeal with the holidays because
we can sometimes forget that asmen, there are some certain
like.
Expectations and stressors thatwe, in particular as men tend to
(00:48):
experience during this holidayseason.
We can kind of get wrapped up inthe fact that the holidays feel
like they're really about familyand often about kids, and that
as men, we kind of take abackseat role in a lot of the
planning and a lot of theactivities.
And so because of that, we tendto ignore a lot of what actually
goes on for us around theholidays.
(01:09):
But in doing that.
It can actually become a seasonof incredible stress for us as
men.
If you're feeling like theChristmas season is just a big
ball of anxiety for you, thenjust know for starters that
you're not alone.
It is for a lot of men.
But today we want to try to talkabout what do we actually do
(01:29):
about that?
We're a little more than a weekout from Christmas if you're
watching this episode on the daythat it comes out.
And I wanna try to help you withjust a few pointers on what you
can do to salvage a little bitof peace during this Christmas
season.
All right, but to do that, weneed to start off by talking
(01:49):
about what are some of the bigthings that cause men stress
during the holiday season?
Now one of the first ones issomething that we actually
talked about in last week'sepisode, which is finances,
right?
We can very quickly get stressedout by how much we're gonna blow
this year's Christmas budget,right?
How much we're gonna likely gointo debt with all of the things
(02:11):
we're spending money on, whetherthat's gifts or parties, or
travel, or you name it.
Christmas can be an incrediblystressful season financially.
So if that's you, I want toencourage you to go back and
watch last week's episode to geta little more insight on the
whole area of finances inparticular.
But apart from finances, there'sa whole lot of other stressors
(02:33):
that go on around the Christmasseason as well.
One big one that we as men don'toften talk about is just the
whole idea of weight gain.
Christmas is a season of.
Eating.
Let's be honest.
That's what, that's one of thethings that we most enjoy about
it.
There's all kinds of good foodavailable during Christmas time
and that's great.
That makes for really greatparties.
(02:54):
It makes for fun atmospheres inthe workplace, like all kinds of
places where food is available.
There's specialty drinks at allyour coffee shops that you like
to go.
There's all kinds of treats thatbecome available at the, you
know, dessert stores.
Like, there's just all kinds ofthings that happen at Christmas
food wise that cause us to.
Eat a lot more than we normallywould, and that leads to weight
(03:16):
gain.
We take in a lot more caloriesthan we typically burn off, but
a lot of guys go into theholiday season knowing that
weight gain is probably coming,and just the anxiety of that
causes a lot of stress.
It can cause dread over theChristmas season instead of joy,
which is what it's reallysupposed to be about.
So weight gain can be a big one.
(03:37):
Another one can just be familydynamics, whether that's your
wife and kids, or more likelyyour extended family.
All of the expectations thatcome from family dynamics around
Christmas time can make thingsreally, really difficult.
Whose house are we supposed tospend time at this year?
Who are we supposed to be buyinggifts for?
(03:58):
What are we supposed to be doingto make sure that they're happy
and that she's happy and that weare happy and everybody feels
good about the commitments thatwe've fulfilled this Christmas
season?
If you come from, uh, a divorcedor broken family, you've got
multiple sets of expectationsthat you're trying to be able to
fulfill, and all of that can getsuper complicated around
(04:18):
Christmas.
So there are lots of stresseswhen it comes to family dynamics
and relationships there whereyou're trying to.
Not only just keep the peace,but actually experience all
those people in a way thatreally does feel fun and
enlivening and actually bringsjoy.
Not just causes stress, but thethought of having to organize
(04:39):
all that and orchestrate all ofit and dance around the topics
that you don't want to talkabout at the Christmas party
because you know it's gonna openup a can of worms.
Like all of those things canjust add to the big pile of
stress and to make it reallydifficult.
To look forward to spending timewith the family members that you
do want to see.
(05:00):
Another point of stress canactually be grief.
Sometimes if you've experiencedany kind of loss in your family
or close friends, the traditionsof Christmas time and the
holidays can just highlight thegrief, can highlight the loss
that you're experiencing, thatthat person is no longer there
to be able to share in thethings that you once shared in,
(05:22):
that you cared about and didtogether, and that you no longer
get to experience together withthem.
That can be super hard.
It can feel very lonely.
It can feel very stressful.
It can feel very sad, and all ofthat adds to the stress and the
difficulty of the Christmasseason.
And even can, like I mentionedbefore, can contribute to that
(05:42):
sense of dread of not wanting togo through the Christmas season
because of the pain that youknow it's going to involve.
So, okay.
So those are some of the bigones, but honestly, there can be
all sorts of Christmasstressors.
Your schedule might just feeltoo full.
You've got too many parties,whether it's family parties or
work parties, or friend parties,or neighborhood parties, or you
(06:05):
know, whatever.
You've just got too many thingsthat you have to go to.
Your kids are involved inthings, your community's
involved in, things your churchis doing, things.
There's just so much going onthat it can only.
Add to the amount of stress thatyou're experiencing when all of
those things taken by themselvesprobably would be fun.
But when you pack that much funinto an already overloaded
(06:26):
schedule, it actually becomesmore stress than it is fun.
So there can be lots and lots ofthings that can contribute to
your stress around the Christmasseason.
So, okay, what do you do aboutit?
Then?
Here we are, you know, not toofar out from Christmas.
Is it too late to be able toactually redeem the season and
to find a little bit of peace?
(06:47):
I don't think that it is, butthere are a few things that you
need to try to do.
The first is that you need toname your stress, all right?
You need to actually maybe evenwrite down the things that are
causing you the most stress, orhave already caused you the most
stress.
So maybe it has been an overlyfull schedule.
(07:07):
Maybe it has been what you'vespent on gifts so far, but also
what you know is still coming interms of travel or other
expenses that you have upcoming.
You need to write down thethings that are actually causing
you the most stress so that youcan start to formulate a plan on
how you're going to be able toaddress those things and create
(07:28):
for yourself some opportunitiesand some moments for some peace.
The next thing that you're gonnaneed to do is you're just going
to have to simplify.
I know it sounds hard.
Simplifying around the Christmasseason inevitably means cutting
some things.
It means like getting rid ofsome things, whether that's
(07:49):
added expenses, whether that'sadded parties, whether that's
added food, whatever it means,it does mean you're gonna
probably have to cut some thingsout.
But the way to do that is not tojust like randomly hack and
slash at your schedule or atyour party engagement or at the
calories that you're taking in.
It's to actually think aboutwhen and where are the places
(08:11):
that you're going to be able toexperience the most joy.
What of all of that stuff thatcould be causing stress that if
you took those thingsindividually and said.
Is this thing actually gonnabring me joy?
Is this thing going to bring mepeace?
Are these are the things that Iwould actually want to do?
Or are these things that I feelobligated to do?
(08:32):
The things that you feelobligated to do are the ones
that you try.
You need to try to eliminate.
As much as you possibly can.
I know there may not be everypossibility of eliminating
obligations.
You've got a family member'sparty that you just absolutely
have to show up to, or you'regonna be hearing about it all
year long, and the grief of thatis not worth the pain that you
have to endure by actuallyshowing up to the party.
(08:53):
Okay, I get it.
But inevitably, there are somethings that you could skip out,
and so it's time to justactually sit down and figure out
what those things are.
You might.
Disappoint some folks.
You might have to say no to awork function that you would
actually like to attend, butit's just not gonna be worth it
in light of the other thingsthat you want to do, or you may
(09:14):
have to miss out on a friend'sparty and you really value that
friendship and would like toshow up for them.
But there's probably ways in thenew year beyond the Christmas
season that you can show up andmaintain that relationship with
those friends that don't involvehaving to just go to one more
party during the Christmasseason.
So there's ways to be able tocut those things out.
When it comes to food and toweight gain in particular, it's
(09:36):
worth thinking about where isthe excess food really coming
from?
Is it coming from too manydinners out?
Is it coming from parties?
Is it coming from lots of extrafood that you have around your
house?
Do you have a whole bunch offriends and family that send you
food and so you just get stuckwith all this stuff that you
don't know what to do with.
If that's the case, then likesome of it may actually be stuff
(09:57):
that you could like.
Re-gift.
If you've got somenon-perishable things or some
package things that come yourway, consider like donating them
to some other localorganization.
Take them to a police station ora fire station.
Take them to a church or schooloffice as a way of just saying
thank you and showing yourappreciation to those people,
and then you're not wasting thefood, but you are getting it out
(10:20):
of your reach and cutting someof those extra calories out of
your life.
If it's just coming from goingto too many parties, then hey,
kill two birds with one stone.
Figure out which parties youdefinitely would like to be at
and cut some of the rest.
And then not only have you cutthe stress of the overactivity,
you've cut the stress of theover calories as well and manage
(10:42):
to really be able to steal backsome joy and some peace in your
schedule.
You've got about 10 days beforeChristmas arrives, and usually
these are the busiest days andthe time that's most full of all
of the Christmas stressors.
So find ways of being able toclear up some of that time over
the next 10 days and really makeroom for the peace and joy that
(11:02):
you want to have so that by thetime you get to the new year,
you're actually feeling goodabout how you spent the holiday
season.
Or maybe you feel like you hadto miss out on something, but by
the end of January you're noteven gonna remember that you
did.
You also might just be able tolook forward to the coming New
Year's season and recognize thathey, maybe the month of December
(11:25):
is a little bit more of a timeof indulgence, and the month of
January is a little bit more ofa time of.
Pulling back of, you can call itretreating or you can call it
fasting, or you can call itwhatever you need to as a way of
being able to just take a breakfrom the indulgence that you
experienced in December.
Now, for some people that's likeway easier said than done, and
(11:47):
so that may not be the rightstrategy for you.
Things like dry January or aweekend fast or some of these
different opportunities.
Uh, even if you're familiar withthe Scandinavian tradition of
Haga, which is just kind ofthis.
Like retreating inwards a littlebit, just spending more time
indoors and trying to makethings as cozy as possible
(12:08):
without overindulging, justsimplifying, but making things
cozy and enjoyable.
Those are great opportunitiesand ways to be able to take
advantage of kind of a pulledback season and January that can
help, uh, reduce whatever youkind of overdid in December.
So it just creates some balance.
And then you can recognizeDecember is a season for joy,
(12:30):
and one of the ways that I'mgonna enjoy it is I'm not gonna
worry too much aboutoverindulging because I know
that in January I'm actuallygonna get benefit and peace out
of the fact that I'm gonna pullback in some of those areas.
So all of that can be ways tosort of help yourself be able to
figure out how are you gonnamanage the season without having
to deal with all of that stress.
(12:51):
Another way of really makingsure that this happens is you
just got to share the weight ofthe stress of this season,
whether that's with your spouseor your girlfriend, or
especially with your tribe.
This is the best thing to beable to do, is to just talk with
somebody else about, Hey, I'mreally feeling some stress
about, you know, fill in theblank.
(13:12):
Whatever it is for you thisseason that you are concerned
about, that you're worriedabout, that you think might
actually cause you someproblems.
Own up to it with somebody else.
That's one of the best ways tojust have an easy conversation
and get a little bit ofaccountability and some help in
being able to know, here are thestrategies that I need to do to
be able to weather this season,and I've actually got somebody
(13:33):
else in my corner that's gonnahelp me be able to do it.
That's what a tribe is for.
That's what your family shouldbe for as well.
But whoever it is, talk tosomebody else and be able to
work those things out.
Now, if you're dealing withChristmas as a season of grief,
that can be especially hard, andthis is again, where talking
with someone can be really,really beneficial.
(13:54):
That might be a pastor, thatmight be a close friend, that
might be a therapist, again,might be your your wife or your
girlfriend.
In some capacity, you've justgot to be present to another
person with your grief.
You've got to allow that side ofyou to come to the surface so
that you can experience it andheal.
You don't heal by keeping itstuffed down.
(14:16):
You've got to bring it into thelight so that it doesn't
continue to be something thatfesters in the dark.
And in doing that.
You probably are going toexperience some pain, but in
experiencing that pain,especially with someone else,
you start to bring healing tothat place of pain so that it's
not as painful again in thefuture, and you leave room for
(14:37):
joy to come back into your lifeas you move forward instead of
just creating scar tissue overthat place in your heart that
continues to ache and to festerand to cause you difficulty as
you move forward in life.
So do what you can there.
Now, if Christmas is just one ofthose seasons that is really,
really tough for you and ittriggers a whole bunch of
(14:58):
things, then I would love to letyou know a little bit more about
my one-on-one and group coachingprogram called Victorious Man
Coaching.
If you would like some helpbeing able to get out of.
A pit of a place that you havefound yourself into and
Christmas is just seeming tomake it worse.
If that's you and you'd beinterested in talking to
somebody about that, shoot me anemail at info@manhoodtribes.com
(15:21):
and let's see if my coachingprogram might be a good fit for
you.
Now as you move through the restof this Christmas and New Year's
season, I want you to thinkabout what it would look like to
be able to experience all ofthat.
Not with stress and anxiety, butwith.
Genuine joy with moments of realpeace and with a sense of moving
(15:44):
into the new year knowing thatyou did this season well without
any regrets, man, that would bean incredible feeling.
That would be the kind ofChristmas that we really all
long for.
Right?
That's the Hallmark card kind ofChristmas.
That's the, that's theexperience that we're really.
Hoping that Christmas can be forus, but putting into place the
(16:05):
things that you need in order tobe able to make Christmas that
way probably isn't going tohappen by accident.
You're going to have to beintentional to be able to avoid
some of those major stressors,and you're gonna have to be able
to take some specific steps tohelp you enjoy it in that kind
of way.
And if you do, you really canexperience the kind of Christmas
(16:27):
season that you would like tohave.
Not isolated, not frustrated,not full of stress, anxiety, and
regret, but full of peace andjoy and wonder, and a hopeful
outlook on the year to come.
And with that in mind, I wouldlove for you to engage in the
comments below and let me knowwhat's one thing that you're
(16:48):
gonna try to do over the next 10days to be able to remove some
stress from your Christmasseason and make it something
more that you can enjoy.
All right, man.
I hope you got some value out ofthis today and, uh, we'll have
one more episode that comes outbefore Christmas and I'm looking
forward to celebrating that withyou as well.
And in the meantime, doeverything you can to help make
(17:09):
this Christmas season a greatone for you, for your loved
ones, for your family, and forwhoever you're celebrating with.
Thanks, and I look forward toseeing you next time.
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