July 29, 2025 • 18 mins
It's a sad truth that the male suicide has reached alarming heights in our culture. We offer some practical suggestions for the man struggling with overwhelming thoughts, or for the man who might be in a position to help another man who is.
We emphasize the importance of establishing basic routines, breaking down tasks into manageable steps, avoiding destructive habits, seeking support from others, and maintaining communication with God.
We also highlight the significance of developing strong male friendships in preventing and coping with feelings of hopelessness.
00:00 Introduction: Addressing a Hard and Heavy Topic
00:41 The Alarming Reality of Male Suicide
01:01 Offering Hope and Practical Suggestions
03:35 The Importance of Male Friendships
05:06 Understanding Your Mindset
07:25 Practical Steps to Cope
11:20 Finding Support and Reaching Out
12:56 Talking to God
14:37 Final Encouragement and Resources
💪 Want to know how you measure up as a man? Take our free quiz, called How Manly Are You? and learn how you can get better at being a man. Download for free at manhoodtribes.com/manly. 💪
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Men, we've got a hard and heavytopic that we need to try to
address today.
If you've been following alongon these videos for the past few
weeks, you know that we've beentrying to talk about why it is
that life feels so difficult formen in our culture right now,
and for most of us men in someway or another, that really is
the case.
Life does feel harder than weever anticipated it feeling, and
(00:23):
yet for many of us it feels sodifficult that we have reached a
place of rock bottom and we arejust kind of ready for things to
be at an end.
Some of us are contemplatingtaking our own lives, and that's
what I want to try to addresstoday.
I mentioned a statistic in thelast video that I did, where in
(00:44):
the United States alone, moremen die every year from suicide
than women who die from breastcancer.
The male suicide rate is growingand only getting worse over
time.
Now, there's a lot of reasonsfor this.
We don't actually need to getinto all of those reasons today.
What I want to try to do todayis be able to offer some, not
(01:06):
just hope, but actual practicalsuggestions on what you can do
if that's the kind of place thatyou're in.
But even if you're not in thatplace, I hope that you'll watch
this video as well.
For a couple reasons.
Number one, if you're a man,it's likely that there's another
man in your life who is in thisplace or who is very close to
this place.
(01:27):
The alarming rate of malesuicide leads us all to have to
face the reality that this issomething that many men are
dealing with, and we need to beprepared to be able to help the
men around us actually face itand know what to do when they're
threatened with it.
Number two.
I think most of us as men areprobably only about one bad
(01:50):
decision or one catastrophicsituation away from being in a
place where we are ready to justpack it all in completely.
That's how difficult life is formost of us at the moment.
And while you may not be at thatplace yet, you may not be as far
from it as you might think.
(02:10):
If something were to go reallysideways in your life, if you
were to lose a loved one, ifyour marriage were to fall
apart, if you were to get firedor for some reason, lose your
job in a really, reallydifficult situation if you were
to have to go a long timewithout a job because it's
really difficult to get a newjob in your industry.
There's all kinds of reasonsthat you might be faced with.
(02:34):
Is life even worth living?
Should I just give it up at thispoint?
I don't want anybody to have toface those kinds of things
alone, and I want every man tobe aware of the fact that just
because you're not facing itright now doesn't mean you're
not very close to facing itbecause of how difficult life is
in general.
(02:54):
One of the reasons that men getinto these situations is because
we're already carrying a lot.
We're already stretched thin,and so when life does take a
sharp turn in the wrongdirection, whether because of
our own bad choices or becausesomething that we had no control
of at all, it can put us into aplace where it just feels too
hard to keep going.
(03:15):
It just feels like there's toomuch to have to continue
carrying.
And so whether or not you're atthat place right now.
Or if that is a description ofyou and what you're dealing with
at this very moment, then I wantyou to continue watching.
I want this video to be for you,and I want to try to be able to
offer some help.
My name's Don Ross.
I'm the host here at the ManhoodTribes Channel, and what we do
(03:39):
here at Manhood Tribes is try toprovide you with a clear vision
of manhood, a clear challenge todevelop strong male friendships,
and a clear path for how to doboth.
Now.
I hope you can recognize thatall of those things are related
to the topic that we're dealingwith today.
And in particular, that kind ofmiddle idea of developing strong
(04:01):
male friendships is reallyimportant to all of us as men in
terms of preventing and dealingwith.
When we get into this kind ofplace where life feels hopeless,
we're despairing and we're readyfor things to end.
Nothing is going to help us morein terms of getting out of that
place or in preventing us fromgetting into that place than
(04:23):
having close male friends,having other guys around us that
we can turn to in the midst ofthose kinds of things.
So.
I want you to go back, uh, andwatch some other videos where I
have talked about this, even thelast video that I did was in
particular about how to developsome of those kinds of
friendships because that willhelp more than anything at
(04:44):
getting you moving in thatdirection.
But apart from that, many of youmight be in the place right now
where you're saying, uh, yeah, Idon't feel like I have any hope
and I don't have any friendseither.
So what good is that going to dome at the moment?
And I understand, and so I wantto try to be able to address
some things that you might beable to do at the moment that
(05:04):
could be of help.
But before I get to thepractical suggestions, I want to
just talk a little bit about themindset, about what's going on
in your world at the moment thatmaybe has you in the place that
you're in, and the kinds ofthoughts and feelings that
you're having right now thatcould be pushing you to making a
decision that you don't actuallywant to make.
(05:24):
Here's what I want to say.
First and foremost, to any guywho finds himself in this
position, it makes sense thatyou think and feel the way that
you do.
Whatever your situation is, andI know that I don't know the
particulars of your personalsituation.
I want you to know that it makessense that you feel the way that
you do life really is as hard asit feels like it is to you.
(05:50):
There probably feels like therecould be some relief and things
just ending, and I'll tell youthat that makes sense, but I'll
also tell you that it'sincorrect.
It's not right.
It feels like relief, but it'sactually an ending.
There is a possibility of endingthe pain that you're in at the
(06:12):
moment, and no, it probablywon't come overnight, but if you
choose to end it like that.
That's an ending that you can'tcome back from.
It's an ending to your storythat you are not meant to have,
and there are ways for you to beable to find a way out of the
pain that you're in right now,other than just packing it in,
(06:36):
throwing in the towel, and beingdone.
So how do we do that?
How do we find some ways out ofthe pain that you are in at the
moment?
First of all, I wanna say thisto you.
You're not weak.
You're not weak.
You're just overwhelmed.
Okay?
You're having to deal with morethan any one man or one person
(06:58):
should have to deal with ever.
It's not fair.
It's not right, but it is.
It is what you're having to dealwith, and so figuring out how to
deal with it is important.
You are not failing becauseyou're having to deal with the
things that you're dealing with.
But I don't want you to fail inthe way that you do deal with
(07:19):
them.
Okay?
So let's talk about how to dealwith them.
First of all, in the midst ofwhat you're dealing with, I know
the temptation can be tosacrifice the basics in your
life, like sleep.
Like healthy rhythms and habitsto your day, like meals or like
(07:41):
healthy meals even.
So I want you number one to justtry to return to the basics.
I want you to commit toyourself.
That you're gonna get up at areasonable time in the morning.
You're gonna go to bed at areasonable time at night.
You're gonna get a healthy eighthours of sleep every night.
You're gonna eat three meals aday.
(08:03):
You're gonna go about your dayand do the things that you need
to do.
If you've got workresponsibilities, you're gonna
do them.
If you've got familyresponsibilities, you're gonna
do them.
And yeah, they might be hard.
Yeah, they might be weighing youdown, but you've got to return
to the basics stick.
To the rhythms and routines,just for the sake of being able
to get through everything thatyou're facing.
(08:26):
Don't give up on the things thatwill actually help you be able
to face some of those moredifficult things from a better
place.
If you're getting enough sleep,if you're getting enough food,
if you're having a regularrhythm and routine to your day,
that will put you in a bettermental and emotional place to be
able to deal with some of themore difficult stuff that you're
(08:47):
facing.
All right.
Number two.
Even with those things in place,it might be necessary for you to
focus on hours and not days.
What I mean by that is sometimesgetting through a whole day can
feel completely overwhelmingwhen you wake up in the morning,
(09:07):
and the thought of making itback to bed in the evening feels
like too much, then it is.
It's too much.
Don't focus on the whole day.
Focus on a few hours.
When you wake up in the morning,what's the next thing you need
to do in that hour?
You need to brush your teeth,you need to shower, you need to
have breakfast.
Focus on that hour and just thethings that you need to do in
(09:29):
that hour.
What do you need to do in thenext hour?
Break it down.
Make it simple steps, and justfocus on doing the simple steps.
Get through the next thing andbe okay that you made it through
the next thing, and if you don'tmake it through the next thing,
that's okay too.
Pick back up at the next hourjust because you didn't make
(09:50):
that this current hour.
Don't let the next hour besomething that you give up on,
okay?
That's why hours are sometimesbetter than days because it's
easier if you fall apart to pickback up in the next hour.
You don't have to wait a wholeday before you try to pick back
up again.
Pick back up in the next hour.
Do the right next thing in thenext hour.
(10:11):
Number three, in speaking ofdoing the right things, it's
time to put away the temptationsand the vices that you know are
pulling you down.
So whether that's alcohol,whether that's drugs, whether
that's doom scrolling on socialmedia, whether that's binge tv,
whether that's porn or someother kind of sex addiction, you
(10:33):
know what it is in your life.
It's time to put that away.
If you have real struggles withaddiction in those areas, then
it's time to reach out to somekind of a support group to help
you with that, whether that's AAor SA or uh, any other thing
that can help you with a programto be able to take some steps
(10:54):
where you can set those thingsaside.
You need to be able to do it.
They're only making thingsworse.
I know that in the midst of thepain, that might feel like the
only thing that's taking theedge off, but it's not.
It's just digging a deeper holefor you to have to get out of.
And so you need to find a way toset those things aside.
(11:15):
You're probably not gonna beable to do that by yourself, and
so that's why you need to reachout to a support group for help.
Which also leads me to thefourth point.
You need to find at at least onesolid voice in your life who can
be a support and a companion toyou.
Now, if you're a part of somekind of a recovery group, you're
(11:36):
likely gonna find that there,and that's fantastic.
If you're not a part of that orthat isn't something that you
need in your life, that's okaytoo.
But you still need to find atleast one other person that you
can talk to about what's goingon with you, that they can be a
solid voice to help you moveforward in this place.
Maybe that's a therapist.
(11:57):
Maybe you're not ready for atherapist yet, so maybe it's
just a friend.
Maybe you don't have a friendthat you can talk to about this
kind of stuff, and so you don'tknow where to turn.
If that's the case, I want toencourage you to call the
National Crisis Hotline.
I.
Nine eight.
Eight is the number if you're inthe United States or Canada.
If you're in another place, youcan look it up online.
(12:18):
Just look for National CrisisHotline.
Your country likely has oneagain in the United States or
Canada.
It's 9 8, 8.
Just dial the number.
Someone on the other end will beable to help.
They will help you be able totake the right next steps in the
next hours or the next days.
They will help you think abouthow you can get connected to
some other voices locally thatmight be able to help you,
(12:41):
whether that's groups orfriends, or therapists, or
whatever it is that you need andwould work for you.
They're gonna be there to beable to help you reach out and
find one other voice to help youthrough the midst of this
situation.
Okay.
And number five, last but notleast, is that you need to keep
talking to God.
(13:02):
Maybe you have tried talking toGod and it feels like he's not
there, and so you gave up.
Maybe you're angry with himbecause it feels like he's not
there, or the situation that youfind yourself in feels like it's
a result of him not being therefor you.
He is there for you, but maybein some ways that you're not
expecting.
And so if you've been angry athim, even if you feel like you
(13:23):
need to.
Tell God that he owes you anapology.
Whatever it is that you need tosay to him, you need to say it.
You need to start talking to Godagain.
Even if it's just to say, God,I'm still here.
I know you're still there too.
I'm pretty mad at you right now,or, I don't know what to do
about you right now.
Whatever you need to say, justsay it, but keep talking to him.
(13:46):
God can be a present source ofcomfort and life to you.
But you've gotta talk to him.
You can't just neglect him inthe midst of this process.
He can deal with your emotionsif you've got anger, if you've
got bitterness, if you've gotunforgiveness, if you've got a
hard heart, if you've got adepressed heart, if you've got
(14:09):
tremendous sadness and you feellike he isn't interested in all
of that, tell him that.
Just start talking to him aboutwhat it is that you're dealing
with and how you wish he wouldshow up in the midst of it.
Just tell him those things.
Even That is a good place tostart, and if you've got a
friend to talk to, tell yourfriend about what you're talking
(14:29):
to God about.
Talk about those things withyour friend.
Hopefully your friend can sharesome of those things with you as
well.
Okay.
Talk through those things.
One other thing that I want tobe able to say to you in the
midst of kind of all of thosetips is something that may sound
a little bit like a gut punch,but I think it's just reality
and I want it to hopefully be asource of encouragement to you
(14:53):
in the midst of what you'redealing with.
It might feel like you don'thave any hope, that you're just
kind of in a place of despairand spiraling downwards, and can
there ever be any hope again?
I wanna say that there can, butat the same time, I want to say
to you, you don't actually needhope to keep hanging on.
(15:15):
I know that might seemcounterintuitive and probably
doesn't sound all that hopefulfor me to say that to you, but
you don't need hope in thismoment as much as you think you
do.
You probably need people and youprobably need routine.
You need things to help you justkeep taking steps forward, even
(15:36):
if there's not a lot of hope,even if it doesn't feel like
there's a light at the end ofthe tunnel yet, there will be
one day, but that day isn'tright now and it may not be
coming soon.
And so in the meantime, don'tlook for hope.
The thing that's going to solveyour problem at the moment,
right now, you need steps.
(15:57):
You need positive steps forward,and you need people, and you
need routine to help you be ableto take those steps.
So reach out and find ways ofbeing able to get those things
and your life again, as I saidbefore, pain doesn't have to
last forever, but it may last.
(16:18):
For right now, quitting.
Isn't actually an end to thepain.
It's an end to everything andit's an end to any possibility
of there being a way out of thepain.
It's an end that doesn't have tobe the end of your story, so
don't let it be.
Don't let it be the end of yourstory.
(16:39):
You are needed.
In this life and in this world,you have a contribution that
only you can make.
You have a role to play and adignity to offer that only you
can provide.
You may not know what that isright now.
That's okay.
You don't have to know, but youwill never find it out if you
(17:02):
give in at this moment.
So don't, don't quit.
You're not a failure.
You're not weak.
You're just in a fight.
And I wanna do what I can tohelp.
And there are others around youwho want to be able to help as
well.
So reach out and find a way.
Again, I want to remind you ofthe National Crisis Hotline.
(17:24):
And if you don't know who towrite reach out to.
That's the first place to start.
And the US and Canada, thenumber is nine eight eight.
Pick up the phone and call'emnow if you need to.
9, 8, 8.
If you want to leave a commenton this video, you can do that
as well.
If there's something that you'restruggling with, put a comment
down below and I'll do my bestto engage with you, but don't
(17:45):
leave a comment as a way ofhoping to get some help from me.
I may not see your comment inthe time that you need me to.
I'm, I may not even be able torespond.
Okay, so don't rely on thecomment section as a way to
reach out for help, but if youwant to offer something of your
story, that's a great place todo it.
Or if guys, you have struggledwith this and you want to offer,
uh, a bit of help to other guysby sharing some of your story,
(18:08):
that would be a good place to doit as well.
So put something down in thecomments and let other guys know
that you're reaching out forhelp or that you're available to
help others as well.
I hope this has been of someassistance to you, and I look
forward to seeing you again inthe next Manhood Tribes video.
I'll talk to you then.
Men, we've got a hard and heavytopic that we need to try to
address today.
If you've been following alongon these videos for the past few
weeks, you know that we've beentrying to talk about why it is
that life feels so difficult formen in our culture right now,
and for most of us men in someway or another, that really is
the case.
Life does feel harder than weever anticipated it feeling, and
(00:23):
yet for many of us it feels sodifficult that we have reached a
place of rock bottom and we arejust kind of ready for things to
be at an end.
Some of us are contemplatingtaking our own lives, and that's
what I want to try to addresstoday.
I mentioned a statistic in thelast video that I did, where in
(00:44):
the United States alone, moremen die every year from suicide
than women who die from breastcancer.
The male suicide rate is growingand only getting worse over
time.
Now, there's a lot of reasonsfor this.
We don't actually need to getinto all of those reasons today.
What I want to try to do todayis be able to offer some, not
(01:06):
just hope, but actual practicalsuggestions on what you can do
if that's the kind of place thatyou're in.
But even if you're not in thatplace, I hope that you'll watch
this video as well.
For a couple reasons.
Number one, if you're a man,it's likely that there's another
man in your life who is in thisplace or who is very close to
this place.
(01:27):
The alarming rate of malesuicide leads us all to have to
face the reality that this issomething that many men are
dealing with, and we need to beprepared to be able to help the
men around us actually face itand know what to do when they're
threatened with it.
Number two.
I think most of us as men areprobably only about one bad
(01:50):
decision or one catastrophicsituation away from being in a
place where we are ready to justpack it all in completely.
That's how difficult life is formost of us at the moment.
And while you may not be at thatplace yet, you may not be as far
from it as you might think.
(02:10):
If something were to go reallysideways in your life, if you
were to lose a loved one, ifyour marriage were to fall
apart, if you were to get firedor for some reason, lose your
job in a really, reallydifficult situation if you were
to have to go a long timewithout a job because it's
really difficult to get a newjob in your industry.
There's all kinds of reasonsthat you might be faced with.
(02:34):
Is life even worth living?
Should I just give it up at thispoint?
I don't want anybody to have toface those kinds of things
alone, and I want every man tobe aware of the fact that just
because you're not facing itright now doesn't mean you're
not very close to facing itbecause of how difficult life is
in general.
(02:54):
One of the reasons that men getinto these situations is because
we're already carrying a lot.
We're already stretched thin,and so when life does take a
sharp turn in the wrongdirection, whether because of
our own bad choices or becausesomething that we had no control
of at all, it can put us into aplace where it just feels too
hard to keep going.
(03:15):
It just feels like there's toomuch to have to continue
carrying.
And so whether or not you're atthat place right now.
Or if that is a description ofyou and what you're dealing with
at this very moment, then I wantyou to continue watching.
I want this video to be for you,and I want to try to be able to
offer some help.
My name's Don Ross.
I'm the host here at the ManhoodTribes Channel, and what we do
(03:39):
here at Manhood Tribes is try toprovide you with a clear vision
of manhood, a clear challenge todevelop strong male friendships,
and a clear path for how to doboth.
Now.
I hope you can recognize thatall of those things are related
to the topic that we're dealingwith today.
And in particular, that kind ofmiddle idea of developing strong
(04:01):
male friendships is reallyimportant to all of us as men in
terms of preventing and dealingwith.
When we get into this kind ofplace where life feels hopeless,
we're despairing and we're readyfor things to end.
Nothing is going to help us morein terms of getting out of that
place or in preventing us fromgetting into that place than
(04:23):
having close male friends,having other guys around us that
we can turn to in the midst ofthose kinds of things.
So.
I want you to go back, uh, andwatch some other videos where I
have talked about this, even thelast video that I did was in
particular about how to developsome of those kinds of
friendships because that willhelp more than anything at
(04:44):
getting you moving in thatdirection.
But apart from that, many of youmight be in the place right now
where you're saying, uh, yeah, Idon't feel like I have any hope
and I don't have any friendseither.
So what good is that going to dome at the moment?
And I understand, and so I wantto try to be able to address
some things that you might beable to do at the moment that
(05:04):
could be of help.
But before I get to thepractical suggestions, I want to
just talk a little bit about themindset, about what's going on
in your world at the moment thatmaybe has you in the place that
you're in, and the kinds ofthoughts and feelings that
you're having right now thatcould be pushing you to making a
decision that you don't actuallywant to make.
(05:24):
Here's what I want to say.
First and foremost, to any guywho finds himself in this
position, it makes sense thatyou think and feel the way that
you do.
Whatever your situation is, andI know that I don't know the
particulars of your personalsituation.
I want you to know that it makessense that you feel the way that
you do life really is as hard asit feels like it is to you.
(05:50):
There probably feels like therecould be some relief and things
just ending, and I'll tell youthat that makes sense, but I'll
also tell you that it'sincorrect.
It's not right.
It feels like relief, but it'sactually an ending.
There is a possibility of endingthe pain that you're in at the
(06:12):
moment, and no, it probablywon't come overnight, but if you
choose to end it like that.
That's an ending that you can'tcome back from.
It's an ending to your storythat you are not meant to have,
and there are ways for you to beable to find a way out of the
pain that you're in right now,other than just packing it in,
(06:36):
throwing in the towel, and beingdone.
So how do we do that?
How do we find some ways out ofthe pain that you are in at the
moment?
First of all, I wanna say thisto you.
You're not weak.
You're not weak.
You're just overwhelmed.
Okay?
You're having to deal with morethan any one man or one person
(06:58):
should have to deal with ever.
It's not fair.
It's not right, but it is.
It is what you're having to dealwith, and so figuring out how to
deal with it is important.
You are not failing becauseyou're having to deal with the
things that you're dealing with.
But I don't want you to fail inthe way that you do deal with
(07:19):
them.
Okay?
So let's talk about how to dealwith them.
First of all, in the midst ofwhat you're dealing with, I know
the temptation can be tosacrifice the basics in your
life, like sleep.
Like healthy rhythms and habitsto your day, like meals or like
(07:41):
healthy meals even.
So I want you number one to justtry to return to the basics.
I want you to commit toyourself.
That you're gonna get up at areasonable time in the morning.
You're gonna go to bed at areasonable time at night.
You're gonna get a healthy eighthours of sleep every night.
You're gonna eat three meals aday.
(08:03):
You're gonna go about your dayand do the things that you need
to do.
If you've got workresponsibilities, you're gonna
do them.
If you've got familyresponsibilities, you're gonna
do them.
And yeah, they might be hard.
Yeah, they might be weighing youdown, but you've got to return
to the basics stick.
To the rhythms and routines,just for the sake of being able
to get through everything thatyou're facing.
(08:26):
Don't give up on the things thatwill actually help you be able
to face some of those moredifficult things from a better
place.
If you're getting enough sleep,if you're getting enough food,
if you're having a regularrhythm and routine to your day,
that will put you in a bettermental and emotional place to be
able to deal with some of themore difficult stuff that you're
(08:47):
facing.
All right.
Number two.
Even with those things in place,it might be necessary for you to
focus on hours and not days.
What I mean by that is sometimesgetting through a whole day can
feel completely overwhelmingwhen you wake up in the morning,
(09:07):
and the thought of making itback to bed in the evening feels
like too much, then it is.
It's too much.
Don't focus on the whole day.
Focus on a few hours.
When you wake up in the morning,what's the next thing you need
to do in that hour?
You need to brush your teeth,you need to shower, you need to
have breakfast.
Focus on that hour and just thethings that you need to do in
(09:29):
that hour.
What do you need to do in thenext hour?
Break it down.
Make it simple steps, and justfocus on doing the simple steps.
Get through the next thing andbe okay that you made it through
the next thing, and if you don'tmake it through the next thing,
that's okay too.
Pick back up at the next hourjust because you didn't make
(09:50):
that this current hour.
Don't let the next hour besomething that you give up on,
okay?
That's why hours are sometimesbetter than days because it's
easier if you fall apart to pickback up in the next hour.
You don't have to wait a wholeday before you try to pick back
up again.
Pick back up in the next hour.
Do the right next thing in thenext hour.
(10:11):
Number three, in speaking ofdoing the right things, it's
time to put away the temptationsand the vices that you know are
pulling you down.
So whether that's alcohol,whether that's drugs, whether
that's doom scrolling on socialmedia, whether that's binge tv,
whether that's porn or someother kind of sex addiction, you
(10:33):
know what it is in your life.
It's time to put that away.
If you have real struggles withaddiction in those areas, then
it's time to reach out to somekind of a support group to help
you with that, whether that's AAor SA or uh, any other thing
that can help you with a programto be able to take some steps
(10:54):
where you can set those thingsaside.
You need to be able to do it.
They're only making thingsworse.
I know that in the midst of thepain, that might feel like the
only thing that's taking theedge off, but it's not.
It's just digging a deeper holefor you to have to get out of.
And so you need to find a way toset those things aside.
(11:15):
You're probably not gonna beable to do that by yourself, and
so that's why you need to reachout to a support group for help.
Which also leads me to thefourth point.
You need to find at at least onesolid voice in your life who can
be a support and a companion toyou.
Now, if you're a part of somekind of a recovery group, you're
(11:36):
likely gonna find that there,and that's fantastic.
If you're not a part of that orthat isn't something that you
need in your life, that's okaytoo.
But you still need to find atleast one other person that you
can talk to about what's goingon with you, that they can be a
solid voice to help you moveforward in this place.
Maybe that's a therapist.
(11:57):
Maybe you're not ready for atherapist yet, so maybe it's
just a friend.
Maybe you don't have a friendthat you can talk to about this
kind of stuff, and so you don'tknow where to turn.
If that's the case, I want toencourage you to call the
National Crisis Hotline.
I.
Nine eight.
Eight is the number if you're inthe United States or Canada.
If you're in another place, youcan look it up online.
(12:18):
Just look for National CrisisHotline.
Your country likely has oneagain in the United States or
Canada.
It's 9 8, 8.
Just dial the number.
Someone on the other end will beable to help.
They will help you be able totake the right next steps in the
next hours or the next days.
They will help you think abouthow you can get connected to
some other voices locally thatmight be able to help you,
(12:41):
whether that's groups orfriends, or therapists, or
whatever it is that you need andwould work for you.
They're gonna be there to beable to help you reach out and
find one other voice to help youthrough the midst of this
situation.
Okay.
And number five, last but notleast, is that you need to keep
talking to God.
(13:02):
Maybe you have tried talking toGod and it feels like he's not
there, and so you gave up.
Maybe you're angry with himbecause it feels like he's not
there, or the situation that youfind yourself in feels like it's
a result of him not being therefor you.
He is there for you, but maybein some ways that you're not
expecting.
And so if you've been angry athim, even if you feel like you
(13:23):
need to.
Tell God that he owes you anapology.
Whatever it is that you need tosay to him, you need to say it.
You need to start talking to Godagain.
Even if it's just to say, God,I'm still here.
I know you're still there too.
I'm pretty mad at you right now,or, I don't know what to do
about you right now.
Whatever you need to say, justsay it, but keep talking to him.
(13:46):
God can be a present source ofcomfort and life to you.
But you've gotta talk to him.
You can't just neglect him inthe midst of this process.
He can deal with your emotionsif you've got anger, if you've
got bitterness, if you've gotunforgiveness, if you've got a
hard heart, if you've got adepressed heart, if you've got
(14:09):
tremendous sadness and you feellike he isn't interested in all
of that, tell him that.
Just start talking to him aboutwhat it is that you're dealing
with and how you wish he wouldshow up in the midst of it.
Just tell him those things.
Even That is a good place tostart, and if you've got a
friend to talk to, tell yourfriend about what you're talking
(14:29):
to God about.
Talk about those things withyour friend.
Hopefully your friend can sharesome of those things with you as
well.
Okay.
Talk through those things.
One other thing that I want tobe able to say to you in the
midst of kind of all of thosetips is something that may sound
a little bit like a gut punch,but I think it's just reality
and I want it to hopefully be asource of encouragement to you
(14:53):
in the midst of what you'redealing with.
It might feel like you don'thave any hope, that you're just
kind of in a place of despairand spiraling downwards, and can
there ever be any hope again?
I wanna say that there can, butat the same time, I want to say
to you, you don't actually needhope to keep hanging on.
(15:15):
I know that might seemcounterintuitive and probably
doesn't sound all that hopefulfor me to say that to you, but
you don't need hope in thismoment as much as you think you
do.
You probably need people and youprobably need routine.
You need things to help you justkeep taking steps forward, even
(15:36):
if there's not a lot of hope,even if it doesn't feel like
there's a light at the end ofthe tunnel yet, there will be
one day, but that day isn'tright now and it may not be
coming soon.
And so in the meantime, don'tlook for hope.
The thing that's going to solveyour problem at the moment,
right now, you need steps.
(15:57):
You need positive steps forward,and you need people, and you
need routine to help you be ableto take those steps.
So reach out and find ways ofbeing able to get those things
and your life again, as I saidbefore, pain doesn't have to
last forever, but it may last.
(16:18):
For right now, quitting.
Isn't actually an end to thepain.
It's an end to everything andit's an end to any possibility
of there being a way out of thepain.
It's an end that doesn't have tobe the end of your story, so
don't let it be.
Don't let it be the end of yourstory.
(16:39):
You are needed.
In this life and in this world,you have a contribution that
only you can make.
You have a role to play and adignity to offer that only you
can provide.
You may not know what that isright now.
That's okay.
You don't have to know, but youwill never find it out if you
(17:02):
give in at this moment.
So don't, don't quit.
You're not a failure.
You're not weak.
You're just in a fight.
And I wanna do what I can tohelp.
And there are others around youwho want to be able to help as
well.
So reach out and find a way.
Again, I want to remind you ofthe National Crisis Hotline.
(17:24):
And if you don't know who towrite reach out to.
That's the first place to start.
And the US and Canada, thenumber is nine eight eight.
Pick up the phone and call'emnow if you need to.
9, 8, 8.
If you want to leave a commenton this video, you can do that
as well.
If there's something that you'restruggling with, put a comment
down below and I'll do my bestto engage with you, but don't
(17:45):
leave a comment as a way ofhoping to get some help from me.
I may not see your comment inthe time that you need me to.
I'm, I may not even be able torespond.
Okay, so don't rely on thecomment section as a way to
reach out for help, but if youwant to offer something of your
story, that's a great place todo it.
Or if guys, you have struggledwith this and you want to offer,
uh, a bit of help to other guysby sharing some of your story,
(18:08):
that would be a good place to doit as well.
So put something down in thecomments and let other guys know
that you're reaching out forhelp or that you're available to
help others as well.
I hope this has been of someassistance to you, and I look
forward to seeing you again inthe next Manhood Tribes video.
I'll talk to you then.
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
NFL Daily with Gregg Rosenthal
Gregg Rosenthal and a rotating crew of elite NFL Media co-hosts, including Patrick Claybon, Colleen Wolfe, Steve Wyche, Nick Shook and Jourdan Rodrigue of The Athletic get you caught up daily on all the NFL news and analysis you need to be smarter and funnier than your friends.