August 5, 2025 • 51 mins
Ever wondered why that outfit in your closet makes you feel unstoppable? The connection between what we wear and how we're perceived runs deeper than we might think.
When you dress with intention, you're not just covering your body—you're crafting a visual story about who you are. Our clothing choices influence first impressions, professional opportunities, and most importantly, how we feel about ourselves. As women, we often face contradicting messages about appropriate attire, leaving us questioning if we can be both respected and admired simultaneously.
What's fascinating is how clothing becomes a powerful tool for self-expression while simultaneously building confidence. That favorite outfit isn't just fabric—it's armor that transforms your posture, your voice, and even how you interact with others. The right clothing fits your body type, reflects your personality, and makes you feel authentically you without breaking the bank. Your signature style doesn't require designer labels—it requires intentionality.
The most compelling insight? The false dichotomy between "classy" and "sexy." These qualities aren't opposing forces but complementary energies that stem from self-awareness, confidence, and authenticity. True sex appeal radiates from within—it's about energy, not exposure. A woman who carries herself with poise and grace creates a magnetic presence regardless of how much skin she shows.
Next time you stand before your closet, remember that your clothing choices represent not just fashion preferences but your values, your self-respect, and how you wish to engage with the world. Join us in two weeks as we explore "What Men Want" and continue this conversation about authentic self-presentation in a world of mixed messages.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
so Thank you, welcome , welcome, welcome.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
I am so, so excited to be back.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
I am so, so excited to be back.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
I truly, truly appreciate it.
(01:50):
If you don't know me, my nameis Patsy, lady P, and I am so
excited to be here.
So let me share with you whatI've been doing for the last
couple of weeks.
Doing for the last couple ofweeks Outside of grandparents'
sitting, I went to a convention,a black multicultural
(02:15):
convention in Orlando.
It was really nice and relaxing.
I got a chance to sleep in anddo a little you know R&R for
myself, which I so desperatelyneeded.
So I did get the opportunity todo that.
Outside.
I got some churching in, youknow, a little bit of hand
clapping and toe stomping, as mygrandmother would say.
So I got an opportunity to getin there and do that as well.
So I was completely, completelyrelaxed, got rejuvenated with
(02:37):
my spirit in the Lord and I'mready to go.
But I do have school coming upsoon, so it's coming, it's going
to happen.
So I'm just going to take myopportunity to relax, get my
mind ready before I head back toschool.
So I am kind of excited abouthaving something to do versus
(02:58):
not having anything to do.
But for the most part I've justbeen laying around doing
absolutely nothing, and I amloving all of it, loving it.
I am cooking.
My husband's complaining that Idon't cook that girl don't know
where the kitchen at.
But since I've been home andhe's been working now in the
daytime, I try to have a littlemeal or something prepared for
(03:20):
him when he gets home.
Try and do my little wife duty,you know make sure my man's
taken care of and make sure he'sgood to go when he comes
through the door.
So that's kind of what I'vebeen up to.
So you know, I'm going to askhim.
Go ahead and roll my footagefor me.
Thank you, okay.
(04:14):
So thank you again for joiningme.
If you haven't liked and shared, please like, subscribe if you
haven't, and share.
Thank you so much.
I would appreciate it.
I see Malika's on the line.
Let me give a shout out to her.
I hope you're feeling better,love.
She wasn't feeling too wellyesterday, but I'm hoping she's
feeling a lot better today andas time goes you'll get better
(04:34):
and better.
I'm just praying for you.
I pray that God just you know,heal your body, and I see we
have seven other people on theline, but I would love to give
you a shout out If you just typein there, hi, so I can see your
name and that way you know Ican give you a shout out.
Ok, so I'm not going to prolongthe time, because I'm really
excited about this particulartopic.
I kind of went through somedifferent ideas as to how I
(04:58):
wanted to come, because lastweek, two weeks ago, we talked
about self-love and what do wedo to make ourselves feel loved
and make ourselves feel, youknow, make ourselves feel good,
pat our own self on the back,you know, and I had some great,
great comments and suggestions,which goes off to you, ladies,
(05:19):
because some of the things yousuggested I even tried as well
and it worked out.
So thank you so much forparticipating and feeding back
to me.
Hi, brother Daryl, thank youfor being on the line.
Hi, tamron, Hi, thank you somuch for joining us.
So I want to talk about what weshould wear as women.
(05:42):
I can't really come up with theexact topic, as I wanted to do,
but it says there's reasons whywhat we wear matters, and it's
so important because at this dayand time, we see all types of
things, no matter where they'regoing grocery store, airport,
conferences at the school.
(06:02):
It's getting to a point wherewe're not really presenting
ourselves as being taken serious.
So our topic tonight is goingto be like what women does dress
matter and as choices, dressingdo matter because it gives the
influence of perception, ithelps with our confidence, it
(06:23):
even helped with our careeropportunities and, while we have
our own personal style and ourown way that we express
ourselves in the way that wedress, it could definitely help
influence our social interactionand also it builds our
self-esteem.
So I was like, yeah, I can rollwith that, but we're going to
(06:45):
go through a few things here.
We won't.
You know, I want to.
If you have anything that youwould like to say, in the
comments please, and I canrespond to them.
Or you can call in, which wouldbe great at the number
754-222-2219.
So if you want to call in,that's fine and give us some
(07:06):
ideas on you know how you'refeeling and what you think about
the topic would be great,because this is an interaction.
It's just not.
I don't know it all, so I'malways learning and we can learn
and do these things together.
All right, okay.
So first impressions andperception how you present
yourself as a woman, a lady, ayoung lady, a girl, how you
(07:27):
present yourself, it matters.
You have to be mindful of theattention that you're trying to
grasp.
Even if you're not trying tograsp the attention, dress
prepared to the way that whatyou're going to receive is how
you put out, if that makes anysense.
People often judge you by whatthey see you wearing.
(07:48):
Is it right?
No, you can't.
You know, my mom and my girlused to say you can't judge a
book by its cover.
So no, sometimes it's not right.
But when you're dressing topresent yourself, you want to
present yourself in a mannerwhere you're taken serious, you
hold confidence about how youfeel and you're holding your
(08:09):
head high about you.
You're okay with what you got.
And if you put on something andyou got to cover it up because
you feel uncomfortable, maybeyou shouldn't have went with
that Perfect example.
Like I said earlier, we were ata conference in Orlando and we
were all having breakfast andyou know everybody's trying to
(08:31):
get their breakfast on beforethey go to the final service and
a young lady walked in and Iguess when she got dressed she
felt okay because whoever shewas with was like hey, cool.
But once she got in thepresence of other people she
started to try and pull herjacket closed, which wasn't big
enough to close and cover.
But if you've got to questionyourself when you get dressed,
(08:55):
do it, because chances are, ifyou've got to question it, you
shouldn't be wearing it, andthat's how I feel.
When you're dressingprofessionally wearing it.
That's how I feel.
When you're dressingprofessionally, you want to
enhance the perception and thecompetence of your
trustworthiness.
When I go to work, I try todress like Patsy.
(09:17):
I don't try to dress likeanyone else.
I try to be confident in whatI'm wearing.
I try to be professional inwhat I'm wearing.
I spend a lot of time like I gofrom room to room to check on
the teachers and the babies, soa lot of times I'm on the floor.
So I try to wear stuff that Ican get on the floor with the
kids with, which means I'm notgoing to be showing anything
(09:39):
that's going to show parts of mybody that shouldn't be shown.
I try to be professional in allmanners, but it also depends on
the type of work that you'redoing.
Like I say, I'm constantly onthe floor or hanging out with
the baby, so I try to dressappropriately for that and just
to have respect for myself andrespect for the other people
(10:01):
that is around me as well.
I try to do that.
Hey, nisha, thank you forjoining.
When I'm in a social environment, I try to wear something that's
appropriate, something that'sgoing to how would I say, make
(10:21):
me feel positive about who I am,what I stand for, what I
believe.
So, if I'm, if so, if I amgoing to let's say I'm going to
brunch with, with the ladies orwith the girls I'm hanging out
and I'm doing brunch, I'm goingto do my best and make sure I'm
conservative but comfortable andthat I look good.
(10:41):
I'm going to dressappropriately to what I'm
wearing when I wake up in themorning, one of the things that
I always share with my husband.
When I wake up in the morning,I already know no, I don't, I
don't already know.
Sometimes I do, because I'llset it out the night before.
But when I wake up in themorning, based upon how I feel
and how you know just how I feel, what color I want to wear.
(11:05):
All of that plays an importantpart to help build your
confidence and your self-esteemas to you know how your day is
going to be going, how your dayis going to continue.
So it's important to alwayshave your mindset as to how I
want to be presented, how I wantto be received and how I want
to look.
I want to be received and how Iwant to look.
(11:29):
I try to make sure also that myconfidence and my self-esteem
is in line with one another,like I don't need anyone to tell
me oh girl, you're looking goodtoday.
Because when I wake up in themorning and I look in that
mirror, I tell myself girl, youlook good today.
And half of the time I'll belooking like a hot mess, but
that's okay because I can buildit up.
But if I wake up and say I'mtired and I don't feel like this
(11:51):
today, that's how my day isgoing to go.
I'm going to go to the job, I'mgoing to go clock in because I
got to get my coins, so I'mgoing to go clock in.
But I really go clock in beingconfident in who I am and what I
am.
And it all starts with on theoutside.
It all starts with how I'm.
How I feel on the inside is howI should feel on the outside.
(12:13):
I should feel the same way.
If I'm feeling happy, then Ishould dress accordingly.
You know, if I'm excited, dressaccordingly.
You know, build your wardrobeto a point where you can.
You can use that to exuberatefrom the inside out if that
(12:34):
makes sense.
Okay, so the next one I'm goingto is confidence and
self-esteem.
We already spoke on confidence.
I mean, we already spoke alittle bit on confidence and
self-esteem, but let's talkabout well-fitting, stylish
clothing that can help you buildyour self-esteem.
Now, if you're going to put on asweatshirt and you're going to
(12:55):
put on clothes that's not goingto be flattering to your body
type, then you're going to runinto a problem because you're
not going to be confident inwhat you're wearing.
Because you're not going to beconfident in what you're wearing
, you're not going to, you know,unless you just run into the
grocery store, because there aretimes when I'll throw on a pair
of sweats or leggings and asweatshirt and I'll go to the
grocery store because I'm justrunning in there and running out
(13:15):
.
But usually, if I'm going toleave my home, I leave my home
representing my husband, mychildren, my family, myself.
Because I don't want him to saywell, you know, pastor, I saw
Patsy in the store.
Is she all right?
Because that's just not mystyle, that's not how I roll.
I want him to say oh yeah, Isaw your wife at the store.
(13:36):
Oh, I saw Sister Patsy at thestore.
Lady P, you know, whichever onethey call me, I saw her at the
store, but you didn't see me atthe store in no bathrobe.
You didn't see me at the storein no bonnet.
You didn't see me in the storein no pajama pants, because
those things are supposed to beworn at home and that's where I
wear them.
(13:57):
So, making sure your clothes arefitting you, make sure your
clothes are stylish.
When you're buying clothes foryourself, always buy a signature
piece, something that you canbuild around.
It don't have to be nothingexpensive.
Trust and believe I don't buyexpensive clothes unless I save
for it.
So, and it's not a lot ofexpensive stuff in my closet, I
(14:19):
don't need it, it's not what youhave, it's how you wear it.
So it can come from familydollar, it literally can come
from family dollar, and you canjust build it up, build it
around it, find a signature,something signature and build
out from it.
And that's what I share, youknow, with my friends.
I'm like no, there's like oh,you always dress.
I don't pay a lot for thisstuff, I do not.
(14:41):
And also, when you have on nicefitting clothing, it helps
build your self-esteem, make youfeel good.
You'll be like girl, you'relooking good today.
You know, I saw this one littlevideo about this little girl.
She had to be about six.
She said when I wake up in themorning I look in the mirror and
I say, girl, you is cute, she'ssix.
(15:02):
And if a six-year-old can lookin the mirror and say that to
herself, come on, ladies.
We got to look in the mirrorand say, girl, you're looking
good today.
Hopefully he lets you out thedoor to go to work.
You got to make sure you buildyourself up.
And not only that if we meritladies, we want to keep our
spouses attracted to us.
We want to keep his attentiondirectly on us so we don't need
(15:25):
his eyes wondering.
That's why we got to stay inthe game and we got to make sure
that we're doing exactly whatwe're doing to keep his
attention, and not only just tokeep our spouse's attention.
But you know to build ourselvesup, pat ourselves on the back,
let us know that we are lookinggood and feeling good.
Right, can I get a clap forthat, babe?
(15:50):
Okay.
So the next one isself-expression and personal
style.
This article says fashion is apowerful form of self-expression
, allowing women to showcasetheir personality, creativity.
Allowing women to showcasetheir personality, creativity
and individuality.
That just hit the nail on thehead right there.
(16:12):
Because when you you know, likeI said I can't really stress it
enough how you have to know andyou have to have confidence
within yourself, you just haveto.
You got to be creative with thethings that you have.
A lot of times people think, oh,I need more clothes, I need to
go shopping more.
No, you don't.
You just need to takeeverything out the closet, put
it on the bed and organize itand say, okay, I can wear this
(16:36):
with this over here and I canwear this with that over there.
You got to be able to becreative with the things that
you have.
You don't necessarily have tobe at the outlets all the time,
or at the mall.
You don't have to be.
As a matter of fact, you can dosome thrift stuff too.
You know A lot of nice stuff atthe thrift store.
I've gotten a few items myselfwhich I visit.
(16:57):
I haven't in a while, but I dovisit the clothing choice that
you have, the clothing choicethat you choose.
It should it should reflectyour cultural background.
Now, you know, come BlackHistory Month, everybody get the
business, they doing the things.
You know they got oh, they gotto have the African attire.
I got a whole like back sectionin my closet is geared to Black
(17:21):
History Month, because that'sour culture.
Have I ever been to Africa?
No, I haven't, but I did get achance to see Nikki walk down
the streets of Africa, which Iwill never forget that.
But you know, you want to bringthat into it.
You also want to bring just theculture of what's going on
today, the modern daytime, likewhat's really happening.
You want to make sure that youhave a few pieces that goes with
(17:45):
the flow and a white longsleeve shirt that you can roll
up and wear in the spring.
You can roll it down and wearit in the wintertime.
That's something that you couldput with so many different
things.
Make sure that you are beingcreative and make sure you're
also being an individual.
You don't have to dress likesomebody else.
You have to establish your ownstyle, establish your own thing,
(18:09):
because your style is basicallyyour personality and your
character.
So be careful with that.
Don't try and follow the trendof everyone.
Try to create your own.
I remember my oldest daughterwas in high school and she was
like, mom, I really wantsomething different for school.
And I said, yeah, like what shewas like.
(18:32):
Oh no, I can't think ofanything.
I said I'll tell you what,bring me those jeans.
And I think that was when flarejeans had came out and we took
those flare jeans and put themin some bleach water from the
knee down and we dried them andthey turned out so good.
I was like okay, so you'regoing to wear this and wear a
(18:53):
white top.
She wore it to school, camehome, she went back to a
football game and it was so manydifferent girls wearing the
exact same thing.
Sometimes you have to start yourown thing to get things going
and you just have to be creativein that process of what you're
doing.
Hi, nat, natty in here.
(19:16):
Hey, nat, watching us fromChicago.
Okay, so the next one is womencan dress and feel empowered,
comfortable and or stylish,depending on their preference
Again, your preference.
You have to determine whatyou're feeling that day, how you
feel, what you feel like doing.
(19:36):
If you're feeling flirty, ifyou're feeling, you know, even
if you're feeling sexy, you know.
Dress according to how you feel, okay.
Social and cultural influences.
Throughout history, womenclothing has been influenced by
(19:57):
cultural, economic and politicalfactors.
So true.
Social norms and expectationscan shape a perception of
appropriate tire for differentsituations.
Understanding the social andcultural context of clothing can
help women, can help women makeinformed choices about their
wardrobe.
(20:17):
It is so true.
So if you're going to a brunch,you're not going to wear a
church suit with a hat.
You're not going to do that.
You want to dress according tothe event that you're attending.
So that way you know you won'tfeel out of place or you know
you won't feel a littleuncomfortable when you walk in
the aisle dressed up forSunday's best, when in fact it
(20:40):
was brunch or lunch, or even ifyou're going on a date.
It was brunch or lunch, or evenif you're going on a date.
Dress according to how.
Whatever the event that you'regoing to be participating in,
(21:01):
keep your social and culturalcontext of what you're wearing
to express how you're going togo about that event, if that
makes sense.
So I have a little video, I'mgoing to run and when we come
back we'll talk about it.
You roll that video, babe.
I'm going to stop calling him.
(21:22):
Oh no, okay, the video is notplaying, so I'm going to move on
, okay.
So the next thing is I want youto answer this question.
You can type it in the chat oryou can can call in 754-222-2219
(21:49):
.
The question is is classy sexy?
Call?
And let me know the contentstates that, yeah, some people
(22:10):
find it classy.
It's not just about thephysical appearance, but it's
also about how someone carriesthemselves, their behavior and
their overall presentation.
Do you guys agree with that?
Hit me up in the chat, let meknow.
Hit me up in the chat, let meknow, because sometimes there's
(22:31):
a cross between being classy andbeing sexy.
Some people think that it can'tgo together.
Some people think that it can'tgo together.
Some people think that itshouldn't go together.
You know, and some people arelike you know, it is what it is.
It's how you present yourself,how you feel at that particular
moment.
If you feel sexy, you can feelsexy and not be trashy.
(22:52):
You can be classy and sexy atthe same time.
But if you try to come off withbeing a little bit vulgar in
what you're wearing and you'reexposing a lot, it kind of draws
attention from you honestly,because if someone's looking at
I read this article today wherethis guy say if a man say to you
(23:18):
you're pretty, then he'slooking at you're out of
appearance.
If he says that you're sexy,then chances are he want to sex
you.
But if he tell you that you'rebeautiful and classy I mean he
looked past all of that stuff onthe outside, look directly into
your eyes and scrape to yourheart because he knew for one
(23:41):
you have class, you havecharacter, you you're going to
carry yourself in a way that is,in his eyes, was presenting.
You know you're going to carryyourself like a lady.
And I think a lot of times weget caught up in the
misconception of you know youcan't be.
You can't be both, but you can.
It all depends on what you do.
(24:02):
You got to have confidence, yougot to have poise about you.
You got to hold your head uphigh.
You know.
You got to make sure that youknow you are who you are.
Again, last week we talkedabout self-love, and a lot of
self-love comes along withhaving confidence in yourself.
Also, people that are classy,those individuals they display
(24:25):
that without even trying.
They just display that you knowwhen you ever walk into a room
and when you walk into a room,it's like everybody in the room
just turn to look at you and yougo like what, like what's wrong
what did I do?
That's because that's what theysee in you.
You didn't do anything, youjust walked in the room.
You carry yourself with such apresence that you know, not that
(24:48):
it demands attention, but itdraws attention.
So when you're classy andyou're confident in who you are,
it's easy to be.
You know, with me I have anissue.
When people tell me that I'mpretty, I'd be like OK.
But if they, I'd be like OK,well, thank you.
But if they kept saying, oh,you know, it's just so beautiful
, I start to feel a little wayabout that.
(25:10):
I don't know why I feeluncomfortable.
I don't know why I feeluncomfortable when people tell
me that.
But if they say, hey, you looknice, I'm like OK, cool.
But if they start to elaborateon my appearance, then I start
feeling a little weird.
It's crazy when I feel a littleweird, you know.
(25:31):
But again, it depends on howyou carry yourself, how you're
going to draw that attention.
Not being classy is not justabout what you wear.
You know, it's kind of like yougot to have grace and you got
to have some type ofsophistication about yourself.
Good manners, you don't want tobe out and loud.
I used to be out and loud notthat loud, I wasn't ratchet loud
(25:55):
, but I let my voice be heard.
But I've learned as I've gottenolder that my voice, if I bring
the tone down, then whoever I'mspeaking to it lowers the
chemistry, or should I say theatmosphere, in the situation
that may be discussed, or shouldI say the atmosphere in the
(26:15):
situation that may be discussed.
So, you know, being confidentand poised and having good
manners, all of that comes alongwith being classy.
It's just not about that.
You got to know who you are.
You got to know what you'redoing and how you're gonna do it
(26:39):
.
Just the sound, okay.
So we're gonna roll this video,we will.
Actually we're gonna play theaudio for the video.
(27:03):
Okay, this sounds not workingeither, but in the video the
gentleman was talking about, um,how men feel from their
perspective.
I can't really go in detailbecause I don't.
I don't.
I know a few things on therethat he said.
I think I wrote.
Oh, he said on there about whatwe wear, we can cause people to
be judgmental of us, how wepresent ourselves, how we're
looking.
If you dress, if you dressvulgar, you're going to get that
(27:24):
type of attention.
If you dress, you know sexy,you know, you may get some
attention, but it depends onwhat you're wearing, if you're
trying to dress sexy.
He stated that women men mostlike a woman that has class and
a sex appeal.
So that was one of the thingshe says.
You got to dress in a way whereyou don't feel like the person
(27:49):
is getting a differentperception of what you're trying
to present.
So that was one of the thingshe said.
And he said provocative is abig fat.
No, men don't like women thatare provocative.
They want to smash the womenthat are provocative, but
they're not trying to take thewomen that are provocative home
to meet the mom.
(28:09):
So I was like OK, I thoughtthat would be OK.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
Let's be real, people are going to maybe draw certain
conclusions or perceive you acertain kind of way based on how
you're dressed, and I thinkit's good to just be aware and
understand that.
And I don't think we need to bemad if people want to jump to
certain conclusions because ofhow we're dressed.
(28:40):
And this is why it can getbecome a sensitive topic because
, let's be real, there are somemen out there who can be very
judgmental, right, and if you'rewearing and not just men, other
women, but if you're wearingprovocative clothing, right,
some people are going to jump tocertain conclusions.
Okay, they're going to perceiveyou a certain kind of way and
that might dictate, if they doapproach you, how they will
(29:03):
approach you.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Yeah, All right, I have a caller on the line.
Go ahead caller.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Hello, can you hear me?
Speaker 1 (29:17):
Yes, I can hear you.
Speaker 3 (29:19):
Hi, this is Natalie Richards from Chicago.
Ma, how are you?
Speaker 1 (29:29):
I'm well, thank you.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Good, good, good.
I wanted to talk about or givea comment about, like what sexy
and classy is.
I remember, like a long timeago I remember it being hot, we
were out in Daddy was Station inOkinawa when we sat down and it
was a long conversation aboutthe difference between what sexy
(29:56):
is, difference between what youknow pretty is and beautiful is
, and one of the things you saidabout sex and sexiness and sex
appeal is that you could.
That sex appeal is really afeeling.
It's more of like your energy,who you are, and one of the um
(30:20):
examples you used was like hollyberry, holly, you said holly
berry could wear a haynes footsuit with a top and a bottom and
she would still have thatsexiness or that sex appeal to
her, no matter what she'swearing.
Um, and so when I think aboutyou know that conversation, that
(30:42):
we had it, it reminds me thatyou know you can.
It just says that you can bemodest and still be um a sexy
woman or have that, that sexappeal.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
But it's like a modesty that a lot of I feel
like a lot of men reallyappreciate or a lot of people
really appreciate you know, Iactually I still agree with that
, as I was, as I went down therabbit hole today and I just
kind of put in, you know, mylittle like what do men, how do
men feel about modesty, beingsexy, being classy?
(31:20):
And a lot of them, a lot ofthem say that's what they prefer
.
They prefer, they don't want tosee nothing.
That's going to leave noimagination, you know.
And then you know so.
They want to see a woman thatcarries themselves with poise
and confidence.
And you're so right, sex appealis an energy and you can tap
(31:43):
into that energy because youknow I'll tap into that energy
and then the next day you'll seeme in a pair of sneakers and a
ball cap, you know but I'm stillfeeling.
I'm still feeling like I feltyesterday.
I just changed the narrativefor the next day and that's, I
think, being different and beingable to flow back and forth
between the two, or between thethree, should I say, is good.
(32:05):
It's good and it's easy, andeven with in modesty.
I even looked at that and I waslike, wow, there's so many
outfits that you could wear thatare still modest but still sexy
, still classy.
You know right, you know.
So yeah, I agree, I totallyagree with you.
I'm glad I, I'm glad I was ableto impart into you guys.
(32:26):
Trust me, I pray to ask God forwisdom when it came down to
talking to you girls, because Idid not want y'all in the same
boat that I went through when Iwas your age, so I appreciate it
.
It and look at you, lord, youbring things back full circle.
Thank you so much for callingin.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
I appreciate that, of course.
Well, thank you so much forhaving me, ms Richards, you and
your brother and sister.
Speaker 1 (32:53):
Bye, nat, bye, you and your brother and sister bye,
matt, bye, okay, I got this.
I got a text message from my.
Thank you, lomp, appreciatethat.
Um, yeah, so we go back.
So now we, so now we're talkinglike hey, you can be modest and
not be and still have a classy,graceful, poised, confident
(33:16):
look and still and have sexappeal as well.
As, as Natalie said, it'sdefinitely an energy.
Energy and sometimes I can justsee it exuberates off my
daughters when I'm just kind ofwatching them from afar.
And it's so funny because thelast time they were here they
were tearing up my, my cerealthey were, they was getting it.
I happened to stand in thekitchen and I happened to just
(33:38):
look over at them and even inthe process of them eating like
they were, and just not payingattention, that I'm paying
attention to them, I see that Ihave instilled in them that that
energy, that confidence, thatgrace, that poise, and I'm, you
know, and it's all through thegrace of God.
I do not hold credit for noneof that, because if it wasn't
for him on my side and teachingme how to show and set an
(34:01):
example of how a lady should bepresented and how a lady should
carry herself, it's only by thegrace of God, only by the grace
of God.
The next one is self-awareness.
A classy person is oftenself-aware and mindful of how
(34:22):
they present themselves.
You see, this thing keep goingback to how you present yourself
, and when I think about it Ialways go right back and
piggyback off of self-love.
We don't love us.
We can't expect for somebody tolove us like we love us.
So we got to love on ourselves.
We got to have confidence, wegot to be aware of what we do.
We got to be aware of wherewe're going.
We got to keep our heads uphigh and look around and make
(34:45):
sure we're in the best ofcompany.
That's important too, the typeof company that you keep If you
can't be dressed.
You can't be dressed one way,and your girlfriend got a Tata's
falling out of shirt Becauseguess what?
What did it say?
Birds, birds, birds.
That birds together will flocktogether.
I can't remember that statement.
My grandma said what she usedto say Birds of a feather flock
(35:07):
together Even if you dress oneway.
If a gentleman walk in thatroom and he see you in the
presence of this particularcompany, he's going to
automatically assume that that'show you roll.
So you have to be careful withthat.
And not just a gentleman,anybody they're going to be like
.
Oh okay, she with them.
So learn how to carry yourselflike a lady.
(35:30):
Learn how to be confident inwho you are.
Hold your head up high, becauseyou are a queen, you are a
jewel.
You are a jewel, you arebeautifully and wonderfully made
and you might as well tap intoit.
You might as well tap into it.
And if I'm going to tap into itfor you, tap on in there.
Okay.
So dressing.
Well, while dressing is not theonly factor, dressing in a way
(35:51):
that is both stylish andappropriate for every situation,
every situation, it willcontribute to the perception of
your classiness.
I get dressed to go to thepharmacy.
Don't hate me on that.
I just don't know who I'm goingto run into while I'm out there
and, mind you, the pharmacy isthree minutes from my house.
(36:13):
But if I'm going to thepharmacy and I get dressed, I'm
going to go somewhere else.
I'm going to probably go up thestreet to Ross or Publix or
something like that.
I just make it a fact, and Imake it a fact not to leave my
house disheveled or, you know,just looking a mess.
Bottom line, I don't want to beseen out looking a mess.
(36:33):
Now you come to my house, youmight see me looking all kind of
way.
That's my house, I can do thatand, as a matter of fact, my
husband is now working duringthe daytime.
So since he's not home at day,he used to work at night, but
since he's not home during theday, I can walk around and do
(36:54):
whatever I want.
Sometimes I'll be in my pajamasat 3 o'clock Don't hate, babe,
don't hate, but I'll be in mypajamas at 3 o'clock.
But I know he coming throughthat door by 5.15.
When he come through that door,my hair is done.
I might have some gloss on, Imight have did a little eyebrows
, I'm dressed.
So when he walk in the house,he ain't got to say well, dang,
(37:24):
you been in your pajamas all day, which I'm on vacation.
I think I should be able to bein my pajamas all day if I want.
But you know, so, yeah, so, andthat's what I do.
But I don't want.
I don't even want him.
We've been married 33 years.
I don't even want him to see melooking raggedy all the time.
I have my days, though, andsometimes he'll be like yeah,
you're not feeling it today, areyou?
No, I am not.
You have a problem with that.
Oh no, no, no, I'm just, I'mjust saying, and that's okay.
(37:46):
But at the end of the day, ifyou say, hey, we're going to go
out for dinner or let's go for aride, I'm going to go.
I might not put on a full faceof makeup, but I might put.
I'm going to put on enoughwhere I'm presentable when I'm
out there with my man.
That's what I heard and I thinkyou know us as women.
We have to, we have to bemindful, especially if we're in
(38:06):
a relationship.
You know, we want to continueto make sure we look our best.
And I'm not saying jumping upat four o'clock in the morning
and putting on a full face ofmakeup before he walk out the
door.
That ain't happening.
We just ain't the 60s and weain't crazy, you know.
But make yourself lookpresentable, make him desire you
, make him want you, and even ifyou're not in a relationship,
(38:39):
if you're not married or youdon't have a, make yourself want
to be with.
Look in the mirror and say, isthat a girl that I want to hang
out with?
You know, is it?
I saw another article the otherday which was like I follow this
lady on TikTok.
Her name is Dallas and shealways be dropping little
nuggets to me, dropping littlenuggets in her thing.
And you know she's remarried.
I think she's remarried almostas long as Eric and I have been
(39:01):
married.
But she said you know a womanthat enjoys her own company and
her own peace, a woman that isokay with being alone, is she
good to go?
She can take herself to aconcert, she can go hang out
this place by herself.
That's a confident woman.
That's a confident woman andthe man that's going to come
(39:26):
along in her life, if shechooses to have one, he's going
to appreciate that because shewon't be the clingy one.
Say I'm going out with the boys, see you later, I'm going to go
hang out with my brother.
All right, baby, careful, callme on your way.
You know that woman hasconfidence and she don't feel
like she won't be clingy.
And men don't like clingy women, even clingy wives, trust me,
(39:50):
over time they get sick of us,we get sick of them.
Oh, and so Malaika put in hereabout a little mystery goes a
long way.
That is so true.
That is so true.
A little goes a long way.
And it's so crazy because oneday I was at work and that's in
(40:15):
almost every situation too,malaika I was at work one day
and I was telling my teachers.
I said, hey, I ran out of makeup.
I know I ran out of foundation.
I ran out of makeup.
I can't remember if I saidfoundation or makeup, and they
looked up and they was like youwear makeup.
(40:35):
And immediately I was like, ohmy god, does it look like it?
It was like, no, we, what'swrong?
I'm automatically thinkingsomething wrong.
And they were saying, no, wedidn't we.
We, we didn't know you woremakeup.
No, like I've been wearingmakeup since I can remember they
were like, no, it just blendsin so well and, trust me, it's a
(40:55):
little.
It's a little bit.
And even the same way with myappearance.
You know I'm not trying to drawattention to nobody.
I got my attention right hereat 1721.
But when I leave his house, I'mtrying to represent him.
I don't walk out of the housewith my hair a mess.
I wear a scarf, with a bun inthe back or a baseball cap.
(41:17):
I try to, you know, presentmyself the way.
He would be proud of me as wellas me myself.
Okay, my last point, y'all, andthen we're going to take some
calls, some work calls.
Ultimately, whether youultimately, whether or not
someone finds you classy or tobe sexy, is subjective and
(41:43):
varies from person to person.
However, many people find thecombination of confidence, poise
, good manners and inequalitiesare associated with class.
Can I get a round of applausewith that?
Again, this all goes back toself-love and how we take care
(42:04):
of ourselves and how we feelabout ourselves.
We got to be able to walk in aroom.
I hate to say this, but this issomething that I said to
somebody and the Holy Spiritconvicted me of it, but I want
to share it with you guys.
(42:24):
I went to visit a friend's.
I went to visit a friend atchurch and when I walked into
the church, I just kind of feltlike all eyes was on me.
I went and I sat downimmediately and started like oh
my goodness, what's wrong?
(42:45):
Is this dress too bright?
What's going on here?
This is too much, and I justfelt so weird.
Okay, so later on I was talkingto my teachers again.
I didn't tell them I didn'tshare that situation with them
or how I felt, but we weretalking and talking and then
just the pat from the hood, justkind of bust out and said you
(43:08):
know, when I walk into a room Iwant to look my best from head
to toe.
When I walk in the room,everyone should take notice that
I'm in the room and they kindof look at me like what I say?
Yeah, men and women, children,boys and girls they were like
(43:30):
how stuck up I guess I can'tthink of the word, but that
particular, and when I tell thewhole story it comes into me so
quick about that, but it kind ofmade me.
I said that because of the way Ifelt when I walked into that
church.
I felt so out of place and Ifelt like I shouldn't be there.
But it was a church, so I had alittle issue with these people.
(43:53):
So I'm like you know what, ifthat's how they're going to be,
then whatever.
When I'm like you know what, ifthat's how they're going to be,
then whatever.
When I walk in, I'm going to belike this.
That is not the way to be.
Yes, we should walk withconfidence, we should hold our
head up high and we should knowwe should take note If someone
noticed, smile and nod your head.
That's you know what I'velearned over the years.
It's just okay, they notice me,smile.
I don't like when people lookme up and down and don't say
(44:25):
nothing.
I end up saying, hey, how youdoing you know, and forcing them
to speak back.
And sometimes they do,sometimes they don't.
I get a lot of up and down fromwomen instead of us encouraging
one another and fixing eachother's crown.
It's like we're in competition.
I ain't in competition withnobody.
I got what I need right here.
So I'm not trying to go foryour man.
I'm not trying to lean towardsyou.
I'm not trying to do anything.
(44:45):
I'm just trying to keep myselfconfident, poised, graceful and
classy.
I try to make sure my mannersare good and I think that's
where we have to be.
I try to keep.
I try to make sure my mannersare good, and I think that's
where we have to be.
We have to make sure that ourmanners are in check, because
you know us and we get such astereotypical thing about you
(45:07):
know, black women and theyshaking their heads and all that
.
The reason when they startedsaying that, I stopped doing
that.
I was like OK, this isstereotypical of what they see
us as, so I'm going to stopdoing that.
This is stereotypical of whatthey see us as.
So I'm going to stop doing that.
But you got to be able to knowwho you are and who you stand
for.
I got a comment.
You just say I'd be so sick,wait a minute, I'd be so sick,
(45:30):
it'd be hard to look pretty.
Oh, I know.
But you know what you can bepretty on the inside.
I know you go through a lotwith your health and all that, I
know.
But you know what you can bepretty on the inside.
I know you go through a lotwith your health and all that,
nisha.
But let me tell you somethingthat man married you because you
are the apple of his eye andyou just keep on smiling and
(45:50):
when you can be pretty, bepretty.
You know.
But you know, remember you knowhe chose you to be his bride.
You got to be his bride.
You got to be his bride andhe's going to love you.
He's going to love youregardless.
But if there's anybody want tocall in and say hey, my time is
(46:10):
winding down, but I just kind ofwanted to share that with you,
because sometimes we get in acrossfire or we get in the
misconception of do I have toshow all my skin to be sexy, or
do I have to show all my skin topull a man?
Well it depends on what type ofman you're trying to pull, and
(46:31):
that's going to be the key there.
But remember, if you pull himlike that, that's what he's
looking for.
So even once you get him andyou start throwing on your
sweats and your sweatshirts, hegoing to be over there looking
at Sally Sally, showing the skin.
You want someone that's goingto that.
You can build a foundation with, someone that you can build up
and grow from the bottom up, andI think that's important to
(46:51):
have a relationship that you canbuild up from or you can build
up from the bottom can build up.
And also, you know men, we haveto look at them too, because
sometimes they be looking alittle messy.
You know I I'm constantlybuying um Eric clothes.
I buy him clothes because Iknow how I want him to look, I
know what I want to see, so Isometimes give him the
(47:15):
opportunity to choose his ownstuff.
Speaker 2 (47:17):
I do.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
But for the most part I make sure I buy him what I
want to see him in, because justas much as I want him to see me
looking attractive and sexy tohim, he kind of wants the same
thing.
For me it goes two ways.
And again, when it's just you,you know I'm not single, but if
(47:44):
I was yeah, my peace being bymyself, my confidence would
rocket through the room.
But what I know now, becausewhen I was younger I felt like I
had to be in a relationship.
But for the most part, justkeep it simple, keep your
confidence.
Wear clothes that are going tofit you.
(48:04):
Wear clothes that's going to beappealing to you.
Oh, natalie put in a comment.
She said getting pretty boosts.
It does, does it not?
When you get yourself togetherperfectly.
(48:25):
I used to get my hair done.
I used to go to the salon.
Whenever I went to get my hairdone, you know where I went to
go.
I went to go hit the club so Icould turn up Because I felt
pretty, I looked good, I wasready to go check a tail feather
and sweat it all out, which isusually what happened.
But when you feel good, youlook good.
You know, james Brown said Ilook good, I smell good.
(48:54):
You know, he was feeling goodin that interview.
He was feeling good.
He was feeling good, I smellgood, you know he was feeling
good in that interview.
Speaker 3 (48:58):
He was feeling good.
Speaker 1 (48:59):
He was feeling good.
So if he can do that and feelgood and look good about himself
, james Brown, a sweaty mess onstage, gave the best concert
they say they've ever had wasJames Brown concert was lit,
sweaty, messy, but he gave hisall.
But if he can say I look good,I smell good, hey, that's why
(49:21):
the ladies love him, that's whythe ladies love him, so, okay.
So, with that being said, sinceI don't have any callers, okay,
thank you so much, natalie, forcalling, and we're going to go
ahead and wrap it up for thenight.
I'm so excited about our nexttopic coming up.
I won't share that with youjust yet, but you know, actually
I am.
The next topic is what do menwant?
(49:44):
Hopefully we can get some guys,hopefully we can get some guys
to call in so they can, like,tell us what they want because,
like they say, women are fromMars and men are from Venus.
Yeah, I think that's aboutright, because we don't know
what they want.
They don't know what we want,so they say so we got to figure
(50:05):
out what each other want.
And what exactly are we lookingfor?
What are you looking for in awife?
What are you looking for in ahusband.
So that topic would be what menwant.
And hopefully some men willlisten in and they they'll say
that's not what we want.
So they can correct us, theycan call in and tell us no,
that's not what we want.
(50:25):
that's not what we're lookingfor, you know.
So that's what next topic isgoing to be what men want and,
with that being said, I'm goingto go ahead and bid you guys a
good night again.
Thank you for joining me.
If you, please like and share.
If you haven't subscribed,subscribe, and I look forward to
seeing you guys in two weeks.
(50:45):
Oh yeah, another thing Someonesaid to me that because I
switched, thursday night theycan't be on.
I can't meet the need ofeverybody, but if you know
someone that's available forThursday nights, someone that
can watch us on Thursday night,please like and share and let
them know we'll be back on intwo weeks.
Thank you, I love you guys.
(51:06):
Thank you so much for tuning inand have a great, great, great
evening music.
Thank you.
so Thank you, welcome , welcome, welcome.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
I am so, so excited to be back.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
I am so, so excited to be back.
Thank you so much for joiningme.
I truly, truly appreciate it.
(01:50):
If you don't know me, my nameis Patsy, lady P, and I am so
excited to be here.
So let me share with you whatI've been doing for the last
couple of weeks.
Doing for the last couple ofweeks Outside of grandparents'
sitting, I went to a convention,a black multicultural
(02:15):
convention in Orlando.
It was really nice and relaxing.
I got a chance to sleep in anddo a little you know R&R for
myself, which I so desperatelyneeded.
So I did get the opportunity todo that.
Outside.
I got some churching in, youknow, a little bit of hand
clapping and toe stomping, as mygrandmother would say.
So I got an opportunity to getin there and do that as well.
So I was completely, completelyrelaxed, got rejuvenated with
(02:37):
my spirit in the Lord and I'mready to go.
But I do have school coming upsoon, so it's coming, it's going
to happen.
So I'm just going to take myopportunity to relax, get my
mind ready before I head back toschool.
So I am kind of excited abouthaving something to do versus
(02:58):
not having anything to do.
But for the most part I've justbeen laying around doing
absolutely nothing, and I amloving all of it, loving it.
I am cooking.
My husband's complaining that Idon't cook that girl don't know
where the kitchen at.
But since I've been home andhe's been working now in the
daytime, I try to have a littlemeal or something prepared for
(03:20):
him when he gets home.
Try and do my little wife duty,you know make sure my man's
taken care of and make sure he'sgood to go when he comes
through the door.
So that's kind of what I'vebeen up to.
So you know, I'm going to askhim.
Go ahead and roll my footagefor me.
Thank you, okay.
(04:14):
So thank you again for joiningme.
If you haven't liked and shared, please like, subscribe if you
haven't, and share.
Thank you so much.
I would appreciate it.
I see Malika's on the line.
Let me give a shout out to her.
I hope you're feeling better,love.
She wasn't feeling too wellyesterday, but I'm hoping she's
feeling a lot better today andas time goes you'll get better
(04:34):
and better.
I'm just praying for you.
I pray that God just you know,heal your body, and I see we
have seven other people on theline, but I would love to give
you a shout out If you just typein there, hi, so I can see your
name and that way you know Ican give you a shout out.
Ok, so I'm not going to prolongthe time, because I'm really
excited about this particulartopic.
I kind of went through somedifferent ideas as to how I
(04:58):
wanted to come, because lastweek, two weeks ago, we talked
about self-love and what do wedo to make ourselves feel loved
and make ourselves feel, youknow, make ourselves feel good,
pat our own self on the back,you know, and I had some great,
great comments and suggestions,which goes off to you, ladies,
(05:19):
because some of the things yousuggested I even tried as well
and it worked out.
So thank you so much forparticipating and feeding back
to me.
Hi, brother Daryl, thank youfor being on the line.
Hi, tamron, Hi, thank you somuch for joining us.
So I want to talk about what weshould wear as women.
(05:42):
I can't really come up with theexact topic, as I wanted to do,
but it says there's reasons whywhat we wear matters, and it's
so important because at this dayand time, we see all types of
things, no matter where they'regoing grocery store, airport,
conferences at the school.
(06:02):
It's getting to a point wherewe're not really presenting
ourselves as being taken serious.
So our topic tonight is goingto be like what women does dress
matter and as choices, dressingdo matter because it gives the
influence of perception, ithelps with our confidence, it
(06:23):
even helped with our careeropportunities and, while we have
our own personal style and ourown way that we express
ourselves in the way that wedress, it could definitely help
influence our social interactionand also it builds our
self-esteem.
So I was like, yeah, I can rollwith that, but we're going to
(06:45):
go through a few things here.
We won't.
You know, I want to.
If you have anything that youwould like to say, in the
comments please, and I canrespond to them.
Or you can call in, which wouldbe great at the number
754-222-2219.
So if you want to call in,that's fine and give us some
(07:06):
ideas on you know how you'refeeling and what you think about
the topic would be great,because this is an interaction.
It's just not.
I don't know it all, so I'malways learning and we can learn
and do these things together.
All right, okay.
So first impressions andperception how you present
yourself as a woman, a lady, ayoung lady, a girl, how you
(07:27):
present yourself, it matters.
You have to be mindful of theattention that you're trying to
grasp.
Even if you're not trying tograsp the attention, dress
prepared to the way that whatyou're going to receive is how
you put out, if that makes anysense.
People often judge you by whatthey see you wearing.
(07:48):
Is it right?
No, you can't.
You know, my mom and my girlused to say you can't judge a
book by its cover.
So no, sometimes it's not right.
But when you're dressing topresent yourself, you want to
present yourself in a mannerwhere you're taken serious, you
hold confidence about how youfeel and you're holding your
(08:09):
head high about you.
You're okay with what you got.
And if you put on something andyou got to cover it up because
you feel uncomfortable, maybeyou shouldn't have went with
that Perfect example.
Like I said earlier, we were ata conference in Orlando and we
were all having breakfast andyou know everybody's trying to
(08:31):
get their breakfast on beforethey go to the final service and
a young lady walked in and Iguess when she got dressed she
felt okay because whoever shewas with was like hey, cool.
But once she got in thepresence of other people she
started to try and pull herjacket closed, which wasn't big
enough to close and cover.
But if you've got to questionyourself when you get dressed,
(08:55):
do it, because chances are, ifyou've got to question it, you
shouldn't be wearing it, andthat's how I feel.
When you're dressingprofessionally wearing it.
That's how I feel.
When you're dressingprofessionally, you want to
enhance the perception and thecompetence of your
trustworthiness.
When I go to work, I try todress like Patsy.
(09:17):
I don't try to dress likeanyone else.
I try to be confident in whatI'm wearing.
I try to be professional inwhat I'm wearing.
I spend a lot of time like I gofrom room to room to check on
the teachers and the babies, soa lot of times I'm on the floor.
So I try to wear stuff that Ican get on the floor with the
kids with, which means I'm notgoing to be showing anything
(09:39):
that's going to show parts of mybody that shouldn't be shown.
I try to be professional in allmanners, but it also depends on
the type of work that you'redoing.
Like I say, I'm constantly onthe floor or hanging out with
the baby, so I try to dressappropriately for that and just
to have respect for myself andrespect for the other people
(10:01):
that is around me as well.
I try to do that.
Hey, nisha, thank you forjoining.
When I'm in a social environment, I try to wear something that's
appropriate, something that'sgoing to how would I say, make
(10:21):
me feel positive about who I am,what I stand for, what I
believe.
So, if I'm, if so, if I amgoing to let's say I'm going to
brunch with, with the ladies orwith the girls I'm hanging out
and I'm doing brunch, I'm goingto do my best and make sure I'm
conservative but comfortable andthat I look good.
(10:41):
I'm going to dressappropriately to what I'm
wearing when I wake up in themorning, one of the things that
I always share with my husband.
When I wake up in the morning,I already know no, I don't, I
don't already know.
Sometimes I do, because I'llset it out the night before.
But when I wake up in themorning, based upon how I feel
and how you know just how I feel, what color I want to wear.
(11:05):
All of that plays an importantpart to help build your
confidence and your self-esteemas to you know how your day is
going to be going, how your dayis going to continue.
So it's important to alwayshave your mindset as to how I
want to be presented, how I wantto be received and how I want
to look.
I want to be received and how Iwant to look.
(11:29):
I try to make sure also that myconfidence and my self-esteem
is in line with one another,like I don't need anyone to tell
me oh girl, you're looking goodtoday.
Because when I wake up in themorning and I look in that
mirror, I tell myself girl, youlook good today.
And half of the time I'll belooking like a hot mess, but
that's okay because I can buildit up.
But if I wake up and say I'mtired and I don't feel like this
(11:51):
today, that's how my day isgoing to go.
I'm going to go to the job, I'mgoing to go clock in because I
got to get my coins, so I'mgoing to go clock in.
But I really go clock in beingconfident in who I am and what I
am.
And it all starts with on theoutside.
It all starts with how I'm.
How I feel on the inside is howI should feel on the outside.
(12:13):
I should feel the same way.
If I'm feeling happy, then Ishould dress accordingly.
You know, if I'm excited, dressaccordingly.
You know, build your wardrobeto a point where you can.
You can use that to exuberatefrom the inside out if that
(12:34):
makes sense.
Okay, so the next one I'm goingto is confidence and
self-esteem.
We already spoke on confidence.
I mean, we already spoke alittle bit on confidence and
self-esteem, but let's talkabout well-fitting, stylish
clothing that can help you buildyour self-esteem.
Now, if you're going to put on asweatshirt and you're going to
(12:55):
put on clothes that's not goingto be flattering to your body
type, then you're going to runinto a problem because you're
not going to be confident inwhat you're wearing.
Because you're not going to beconfident in what you're wearing
, you're not going to, you know,unless you just run into the
grocery store, because there aretimes when I'll throw on a pair
of sweats or leggings and asweatshirt and I'll go to the
grocery store because I'm justrunning in there and running out
(13:15):
.
But usually, if I'm going toleave my home, I leave my home
representing my husband, mychildren, my family, myself.
Because I don't want him to saywell, you know, pastor, I saw
Patsy in the store.
Is she all right?
Because that's just not mystyle, that's not how I roll.
I want him to say oh yeah, Isaw your wife at the store.
(13:36):
Oh, I saw Sister Patsy at thestore.
Lady P, you know, whichever onethey call me, I saw her at the
store, but you didn't see me atthe store in no bathrobe.
You didn't see me at the storein no bonnet.
You didn't see me in the storein no pajama pants, because
those things are supposed to beworn at home and that's where I
wear them.
(13:57):
So, making sure your clothes arefitting you, make sure your
clothes are stylish.
When you're buying clothes foryourself, always buy a signature
piece, something that you canbuild around.
It don't have to be nothingexpensive.
Trust and believe I don't buyexpensive clothes unless I save
for it.
So, and it's not a lot ofexpensive stuff in my closet, I
(14:19):
don't need it, it's not what youhave, it's how you wear it.
So it can come from familydollar, it literally can come
from family dollar, and you canjust build it up, build it
around it, find a signature,something signature and build
out from it.
And that's what I share, youknow, with my friends.
I'm like no, there's like oh,you always dress.
I don't pay a lot for thisstuff, I do not.
(14:41):
And also, when you have on nicefitting clothing, it helps
build your self-esteem, make youfeel good.
You'll be like girl, you'relooking good today.
You know, I saw this one littlevideo about this little girl.
She had to be about six.
She said when I wake up in themorning I look in the mirror and
I say, girl, you is cute, she'ssix.
(15:02):
And if a six-year-old can lookin the mirror and say that to
herself, come on, ladies.
We got to look in the mirrorand say, girl, you're looking
good today.
Hopefully he lets you out thedoor to go to work.
You got to make sure you buildyourself up.
And not only that if we meritladies, we want to keep our
spouses attracted to us.
We want to keep his attentiondirectly on us so we don't need
(15:25):
his eyes wondering.
That's why we got to stay inthe game and we got to make sure
that we're doing exactly whatwe're doing to keep his
attention, and not only just tokeep our spouse's attention.
But you know to build ourselvesup, pat ourselves on the back,
let us know that we are lookinggood and feeling good.
Right, can I get a clap forthat, babe?
(15:50):
Okay.
So the next one isself-expression and personal
style.
This article says fashion is apowerful form of self-expression
, allowing women to showcasetheir personality, creativity.
Allowing women to showcasetheir personality, creativity
and individuality.
That just hit the nail on thehead right there.
(16:12):
Because when you you know, likeI said I can't really stress it
enough how you have to know andyou have to have confidence
within yourself, you just haveto.
You got to be creative with thethings that you have.
A lot of times people think, oh,I need more clothes, I need to
go shopping more.
No, you don't.
You just need to takeeverything out the closet, put
it on the bed and organize itand say, okay, I can wear this
(16:36):
with this over here and I canwear this with that over there.
You got to be able to becreative with the things that
you have.
You don't necessarily have tobe at the outlets all the time,
or at the mall.
You don't have to be.
As a matter of fact, you can dosome thrift stuff too.
You know A lot of nice stuff atthe thrift store.
I've gotten a few items myselfwhich I visit.
(16:57):
I haven't in a while, but I dovisit the clothing choice that
you have, the clothing choicethat you choose.
It should it should reflectyour cultural background.
Now, you know, come BlackHistory Month, everybody get the
business, they doing the things.
You know they got oh, they gotto have the African attire.
I got a whole like back sectionin my closet is geared to Black
(17:21):
History Month, because that'sour culture.
Have I ever been to Africa?
No, I haven't, but I did get achance to see Nikki walk down
the streets of Africa, which Iwill never forget that.
But you know, you want to bringthat into it.
You also want to bring just theculture of what's going on
today, the modern daytime, likewhat's really happening.
You want to make sure that youhave a few pieces that goes with
(17:45):
the flow and a white longsleeve shirt that you can roll
up and wear in the spring.
You can roll it down and wearit in the wintertime.
That's something that you couldput with so many different
things.
Make sure that you are beingcreative and make sure you're
also being an individual.
You don't have to dress likesomebody else.
You have to establish your ownstyle, establish your own thing,
(18:09):
because your style is basicallyyour personality and your
character.
So be careful with that.
Don't try and follow the trendof everyone.
Try to create your own.
I remember my oldest daughterwas in high school and she was
like, mom, I really wantsomething different for school.
And I said, yeah, like what shewas like.
(18:32):
Oh no, I can't think ofanything.
I said I'll tell you what,bring me those jeans.
And I think that was when flarejeans had came out and we took
those flare jeans and put themin some bleach water from the
knee down and we dried them andthey turned out so good.
I was like okay, so you'regoing to wear this and wear a
(18:53):
white top.
She wore it to school, camehome, she went back to a
football game and it was so manydifferent girls wearing the
exact same thing.
Sometimes you have to start yourown thing to get things going
and you just have to be creativein that process of what you're
doing.
Hi, nat, natty in here.
(19:16):
Hey, nat, watching us fromChicago.
Okay, so the next one is womencan dress and feel empowered,
comfortable and or stylish,depending on their preference
Again, your preference.
You have to determine whatyou're feeling that day, how you
feel, what you feel like doing.
(19:36):
If you're feeling flirty, ifyou're feeling, you know, even
if you're feeling sexy, you know.
Dress according to how you feel, okay.
Social and cultural influences.
Throughout history, womenclothing has been influenced by
(19:57):
cultural, economic and politicalfactors.
So true.
Social norms and expectationscan shape a perception of
appropriate tire for differentsituations.
Understanding the social andcultural context of clothing can
help women, can help women makeinformed choices about their
wardrobe.
(20:17):
It is so true.
So if you're going to a brunch,you're not going to wear a
church suit with a hat.
You're not going to do that.
You want to dress according tothe event that you're attending.
So that way you know you won'tfeel out of place or you know
you won't feel a littleuncomfortable when you walk in
the aisle dressed up forSunday's best, when in fact it
(20:40):
was brunch or lunch, or even ifyou're going on a date.
It was brunch or lunch, or evenif you're going on a date.
Dress according to how.
Whatever the event that you'regoing to be participating in,
(21:01):
keep your social and culturalcontext of what you're wearing
to express how you're going togo about that event, if that
makes sense.
So I have a little video, I'mgoing to run and when we come
back we'll talk about it.
You roll that video, babe.
I'm going to stop calling him.
(21:22):
Oh no, okay, the video is notplaying, so I'm going to move on
, okay.
So the next thing is I want youto answer this question.
You can type it in the chat oryou can can call in 754-222-2219
(21:49):
.
The question is is classy sexy?
Call?
And let me know the contentstates that, yeah, some people
(22:10):
find it classy.
It's not just about thephysical appearance, but it's
also about how someone carriesthemselves, their behavior and
their overall presentation.
Do you guys agree with that?
Hit me up in the chat, let meknow.
Hit me up in the chat, let meknow, because sometimes there's
(22:31):
a cross between being classy andbeing sexy.
Some people think that it can'tgo together.
Some people think that it can'tgo together.
Some people think that itshouldn't go together.
You know, and some people arelike you know, it is what it is.
It's how you present yourself,how you feel at that particular
moment.
If you feel sexy, you can feelsexy and not be trashy.
(22:52):
You can be classy and sexy atthe same time.
But if you try to come off withbeing a little bit vulgar in
what you're wearing and you'reexposing a lot, it kind of draws
attention from you honestly,because if someone's looking at
I read this article today wherethis guy say if a man say to you
(23:18):
you're pretty, then he'slooking at you're out of
appearance.
If he says that you're sexy,then chances are he want to sex
you.
But if he tell you that you'rebeautiful and classy I mean he
looked past all of that stuff onthe outside, look directly into
your eyes and scrape to yourheart because he knew for one
(23:41):
you have class, you havecharacter, you you're going to
carry yourself in a way that is,in his eyes, was presenting.
You know you're going to carryyourself like a lady.
And I think a lot of times weget caught up in the
misconception of you know youcan't be.
You can't be both, but you can.
It all depends on what you do.
(24:02):
You got to have confidence, yougot to have poise about you.
You got to hold your head uphigh.
You know.
You got to make sure that youknow you are who you are.
Again, last week we talkedabout self-love, and a lot of
self-love comes along withhaving confidence in yourself.
Also, people that are classy,those individuals they display
(24:25):
that without even trying.
They just display that you knowwhen you ever walk into a room
and when you walk into a room,it's like everybody in the room
just turn to look at you and yougo like what, like what's wrong
what did I do?
That's because that's what theysee in you.
You didn't do anything, youjust walked in the room.
You carry yourself with such apresence that you know, not that
(24:48):
it demands attention, but itdraws attention.
So when you're classy andyou're confident in who you are,
it's easy to be.
You know, with me I have anissue.
When people tell me that I'mpretty, I'd be like OK.
But if they, I'd be like OK,well, thank you.
But if they kept saying, oh,you know, it's just so beautiful
, I start to feel a little wayabout that.
(25:10):
I don't know why I feeluncomfortable.
I don't know why I feeluncomfortable when people tell
me that.
But if they say, hey, you looknice, I'm like OK, cool.
But if they start to elaborateon my appearance, then I start
feeling a little weird.
It's crazy when I feel a littleweird, you know.
(25:31):
But again, it depends on howyou carry yourself, how you're
going to draw that attention.
Not being classy is not justabout what you wear.
You know, it's kind of like yougot to have grace and you got
to have some type ofsophistication about yourself.
Good manners, you don't want tobe out and loud.
I used to be out and loud notthat loud, I wasn't ratchet loud
(25:55):
, but I let my voice be heard.
But I've learned as I've gottenolder that my voice, if I bring
the tone down, then whoever I'mspeaking to it lowers the
chemistry, or should I say theatmosphere, in the situation
that may be discussed, or shouldI say the atmosphere in the
(26:15):
situation that may be discussed.
So, you know, being confidentand poised and having good
manners, all of that comes alongwith being classy.
It's just not about that.
You got to know who you are.
You got to know what you'redoing and how you're gonna do it
(26:39):
.
Just the sound, okay.
So we're gonna roll this video,we will.
Actually we're gonna play theaudio for the video.
(27:03):
Okay, this sounds not workingeither, but in the video the
gentleman was talking about, um,how men feel from their
perspective.
I can't really go in detailbecause I don't.
I don't.
I know a few things on therethat he said.
I think I wrote.
Oh, he said on there about whatwe wear, we can cause people to
be judgmental of us, how wepresent ourselves, how we're
looking.
If you dress, if you dressvulgar, you're going to get that
(27:24):
type of attention.
If you dress, you know sexy,you know, you may get some
attention, but it depends onwhat you're wearing, if you're
trying to dress sexy.
He stated that women men mostlike a woman that has class and
a sex appeal.
So that was one of the thingshe says.
You got to dress in a way whereyou don't feel like the person
(27:49):
is getting a differentperception of what you're trying
to present.
So that was one of the thingshe said.
And he said provocative is abig fat.
No, men don't like women thatare provocative.
They want to smash the womenthat are provocative, but
they're not trying to take thewomen that are provocative home
to meet the mom.
(28:09):
So I was like OK, I thoughtthat would be OK.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
Let's be real, people are going to maybe draw certain
conclusions or perceive you acertain kind of way based on how
you're dressed, and I thinkit's good to just be aware and
understand that.
And I don't think we need to bemad if people want to jump to
certain conclusions because ofhow we're dressed.
(28:40):
And this is why it can getbecome a sensitive topic because
, let's be real, there are somemen out there who can be very
judgmental, right, and if you'rewearing and not just men, other
women, but if you're wearingprovocative clothing, right,
some people are going to jump tocertain conclusions.
Okay, they're going to perceiveyou a certain kind of way and
that might dictate, if they doapproach you, how they will
(29:03):
approach you.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Yeah, All right, I have a caller on the line.
Go ahead caller.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Hello, can you hear me?
Speaker 1 (29:17):
Yes, I can hear you.
Speaker 3 (29:19):
Hi, this is Natalie Richards from Chicago.
Ma, how are you?
Speaker 1 (29:29):
I'm well, thank you.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Good, good, good.
I wanted to talk about or givea comment about, like what sexy
and classy is.
I remember, like a long timeago I remember it being hot, we
were out in Daddy was Station inOkinawa when we sat down and it
was a long conversation aboutthe difference between what sexy
(29:56):
is, difference between what youknow pretty is and beautiful is
, and one of the things you saidabout sex and sexiness and sex
appeal is that you could.
That sex appeal is really afeeling.
It's more of like your energy,who you are, and one of the um
(30:20):
examples you used was like hollyberry, holly, you said holly
berry could wear a haynes footsuit with a top and a bottom and
she would still have thatsexiness or that sex appeal to
her, no matter what she'swearing.
Um, and so when I think aboutyou know that conversation, that
(30:42):
we had it, it reminds me thatyou know you can.
It just says that you can bemodest and still be um a sexy
woman or have that, that sexappeal.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
But it's like a modesty that a lot of I feel
like a lot of men reallyappreciate or a lot of people
really appreciate you know, Iactually I still agree with that
, as I was, as I went down therabbit hole today and I just
kind of put in, you know, mylittle like what do men, how do
men feel about modesty, beingsexy, being classy?
(31:20):
And a lot of them, a lot ofthem say that's what they prefer
.
They prefer, they don't want tosee nothing.
That's going to leave noimagination, you know.
And then you know so.
They want to see a woman thatcarries themselves with poise
and confidence.
And you're so right, sex appealis an energy and you can tap
(31:43):
into that energy because youknow I'll tap into that energy
and then the next day you'll seeme in a pair of sneakers and a
ball cap, you know but I'm stillfeeling.
I'm still feeling like I feltyesterday.
I just changed the narrativefor the next day and that's, I
think, being different and beingable to flow back and forth
between the two, or between thethree, should I say, is good.
(32:05):
It's good and it's easy, andeven with in modesty.
I even looked at that and I waslike, wow, there's so many
outfits that you could wear thatare still modest but still sexy
, still classy.
You know right, you know.
So yeah, I agree, I totallyagree with you.
I'm glad I, I'm glad I was ableto impart into you guys.
(32:26):
Trust me, I pray to ask God forwisdom when it came down to
talking to you girls, because Idid not want y'all in the same
boat that I went through when Iwas your age, so I appreciate it
.
It and look at you, lord, youbring things back full circle.
Thank you so much for callingin.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
I appreciate that, of course.
Well, thank you so much forhaving me, ms Richards, you and
your brother and sister.
Speaker 1 (32:53):
Bye, nat, bye, you and your brother and sister bye,
matt, bye, okay, I got this.
I got a text message from my.
Thank you, lomp, appreciatethat.
Um, yeah, so we go back.
So now we, so now we're talkinglike hey, you can be modest and
not be and still have a classy,graceful, poised, confident
(33:16):
look and still and have sexappeal as well.
As, as Natalie said, it'sdefinitely an energy.
Energy and sometimes I can justsee it exuberates off my
daughters when I'm just kind ofwatching them from afar.
And it's so funny because thelast time they were here they
were tearing up my, my cerealthey were, they was getting it.
I happened to stand in thekitchen and I happened to just
(33:38):
look over at them and even inthe process of them eating like
they were, and just not payingattention, that I'm paying
attention to them, I see that Ihave instilled in them that that
energy, that confidence, thatgrace, that poise, and I'm, you
know, and it's all through thegrace of God.
I do not hold credit for noneof that, because if it wasn't
for him on my side and teachingme how to show and set an
(34:01):
example of how a lady should bepresented and how a lady should
carry herself, it's only by thegrace of God, only by the grace
of God.
The next one is self-awareness.
A classy person is oftenself-aware and mindful of how
(34:22):
they present themselves.
You see, this thing keep goingback to how you present yourself
, and when I think about it Ialways go right back and
piggyback off of self-love.
We don't love us.
We can't expect for somebody tolove us like we love us.
So we got to love on ourselves.
We got to have confidence, wegot to be aware of what we do.
We got to be aware of wherewe're going.
We got to keep our heads uphigh and look around and make
(34:45):
sure we're in the best ofcompany.
That's important too, the typeof company that you keep If you
can't be dressed.
You can't be dressed one way,and your girlfriend got a Tata's
falling out of shirt Becauseguess what?
What did it say?
Birds, birds, birds.
That birds together will flocktogether.
I can't remember that statement.
My grandma said what she usedto say Birds of a feather flock
(35:07):
together Even if you dress oneway.
If a gentleman walk in thatroom and he see you in the
presence of this particularcompany, he's going to
automatically assume that that'show you roll.
So you have to be careful withthat.
And not just a gentleman,anybody they're going to be like
.
Oh okay, she with them.
So learn how to carry yourselflike a lady.
(35:30):
Learn how to be confident inwho you are.
Hold your head up high, becauseyou are a queen, you are a
jewel.
You are a jewel, you arebeautifully and wonderfully made
and you might as well tap intoit.
You might as well tap into it.
And if I'm going to tap into itfor you, tap on in there.
Okay.
So dressing.
Well, while dressing is not theonly factor, dressing in a way
(35:51):
that is both stylish andappropriate for every situation,
every situation, it willcontribute to the perception of
your classiness.
I get dressed to go to thepharmacy.
Don't hate me on that.
I just don't know who I'm goingto run into while I'm out there
and, mind you, the pharmacy isthree minutes from my house.
(36:13):
But if I'm going to thepharmacy and I get dressed, I'm
going to go somewhere else.
I'm going to probably go up thestreet to Ross or Publix or
something like that.
I just make it a fact, and Imake it a fact not to leave my
house disheveled or, you know,just looking a mess.
Bottom line, I don't want to beseen out looking a mess.
(36:33):
Now you come to my house, youmight see me looking all kind of
way.
That's my house, I can do thatand, as a matter of fact, my
husband is now working duringthe daytime.
So since he's not home at day,he used to work at night, but
since he's not home during theday, I can walk around and do
(36:54):
whatever I want.
Sometimes I'll be in my pajamasat 3 o'clock Don't hate, babe,
don't hate, but I'll be in mypajamas at 3 o'clock.
But I know he coming throughthat door by 5.15.
When he come through that door,my hair is done.
I might have some gloss on, Imight have did a little eyebrows
, I'm dressed.
So when he walk in the house,he ain't got to say well, dang,
(37:24):
you been in your pajamas all day, which I'm on vacation.
I think I should be able to bein my pajamas all day if I want.
But you know, so, yeah, so, andthat's what I do.
But I don't want.
I don't even want him.
We've been married 33 years.
I don't even want him to see melooking raggedy all the time.
I have my days, though, andsometimes he'll be like yeah,
you're not feeling it today, areyou?
No, I am not.
You have a problem with that.
Oh no, no, no, I'm just, I'mjust saying, and that's okay.
(37:46):
But at the end of the day, ifyou say, hey, we're going to go
out for dinner or let's go for aride, I'm going to go.
I might not put on a full faceof makeup, but I might put.
I'm going to put on enoughwhere I'm presentable when I'm
out there with my man.
That's what I heard and I thinkyou know us as women.
We have to, we have to bemindful, especially if we're in
(38:06):
a relationship.
You know, we want to continueto make sure we look our best.
And I'm not saying jumping upat four o'clock in the morning
and putting on a full face ofmakeup before he walk out the
door.
That ain't happening.
We just ain't the 60s and weain't crazy, you know.
But make yourself lookpresentable, make him desire you
, make him want you, and even ifyou're not in a relationship,
(38:39):
if you're not married or youdon't have a, make yourself want
to be with.
Look in the mirror and say, isthat a girl that I want to hang
out with?
You know, is it?
I saw another article the otherday which was like I follow this
lady on TikTok.
Her name is Dallas and shealways be dropping little
nuggets to me, dropping littlenuggets in her thing.
And you know she's remarried.
I think she's remarried almostas long as Eric and I have been
(39:01):
married.
But she said you know a womanthat enjoys her own company and
her own peace, a woman that isokay with being alone, is she
good to go?
She can take herself to aconcert, she can go hang out
this place by herself.
That's a confident woman.
That's a confident woman andthe man that's going to come
(39:26):
along in her life, if shechooses to have one, he's going
to appreciate that because shewon't be the clingy one.
Say I'm going out with the boys, see you later, I'm going to go
hang out with my brother.
All right, baby, careful, callme on your way.
You know that woman hasconfidence and she don't feel
like she won't be clingy.
And men don't like clingy women, even clingy wives, trust me,
(39:50):
over time they get sick of us,we get sick of them.
Oh, and so Malaika put in hereabout a little mystery goes a
long way.
That is so true.
That is so true.
A little goes a long way.
And it's so crazy because oneday I was at work and that's in
(40:15):
almost every situation too,malaika I was at work one day
and I was telling my teachers.
I said, hey, I ran out of makeup.
I know I ran out of foundation.
I ran out of makeup.
I can't remember if I saidfoundation or makeup, and they
looked up and they was like youwear makeup.
(40:35):
And immediately I was like, ohmy god, does it look like it?
It was like, no, we, what'swrong?
I'm automatically thinkingsomething wrong.
And they were saying, no, wedidn't we.
We, we didn't know you woremakeup.
No, like I've been wearingmakeup since I can remember they
were like, no, it just blendsin so well and, trust me, it's a
(40:55):
little.
It's a little bit.
And even the same way with myappearance.
You know I'm not trying to drawattention to nobody.
I got my attention right hereat 1721.
But when I leave his house, I'mtrying to represent him.
I don't walk out of the housewith my hair a mess.
I wear a scarf, with a bun inthe back or a baseball cap.
(41:17):
I try to, you know, presentmyself the way.
He would be proud of me as wellas me myself.
Okay, my last point, y'all, andthen we're going to take some
calls, some work calls.
Ultimately, whether youultimately, whether or not
someone finds you classy or tobe sexy, is subjective and
(41:43):
varies from person to person.
However, many people find thecombination of confidence, poise
, good manners and inequalitiesare associated with class.
Can I get a round of applausewith that?
Again, this all goes back toself-love and how we take care
(42:04):
of ourselves and how we feelabout ourselves.
We got to be able to walk in aroom.
I hate to say this, but this issomething that I said to
somebody and the Holy Spiritconvicted me of it, but I want
to share it with you guys.
(42:24):
I went to visit a friend's.
I went to visit a friend atchurch and when I walked into
the church, I just kind of feltlike all eyes was on me.
I went and I sat downimmediately and started like oh
my goodness, what's wrong?
(42:45):
Is this dress too bright?
What's going on here?
This is too much, and I justfelt so weird.
Okay, so later on I was talkingto my teachers again.
I didn't tell them I didn'tshare that situation with them
or how I felt, but we weretalking and talking and then
just the pat from the hood, justkind of bust out and said you
(43:08):
know, when I walk into a room Iwant to look my best from head
to toe.
When I walk in the room,everyone should take notice that
I'm in the room and they kindof look at me like what I say?
Yeah, men and women, children,boys and girls they were like
(43:30):
how stuck up I guess I can'tthink of the word, but that
particular, and when I tell thewhole story it comes into me so
quick about that, but it kind ofmade me.
I said that because of the way Ifelt when I walked into that
church.
I felt so out of place and Ifelt like I shouldn't be there.
But it was a church, so I had alittle issue with these people.
(43:53):
So I'm like you know what, ifthat's how they're going to be,
then whatever.
When I'm like you know what, ifthat's how they're going to be,
then whatever.
When I walk in, I'm going to belike this.
That is not the way to be.
Yes, we should walk withconfidence, we should hold our
head up high and we should knowwe should take note If someone
noticed, smile and nod your head.
That's you know what I'velearned over the years.
It's just okay, they notice me,smile.
I don't like when people lookme up and down and don't say
(44:25):
nothing.
I end up saying, hey, how youdoing you know, and forcing them
to speak back.
And sometimes they do,sometimes they don't.
I get a lot of up and down fromwomen instead of us encouraging
one another and fixing eachother's crown.
It's like we're in competition.
I ain't in competition withnobody.
I got what I need right here.
So I'm not trying to go foryour man.
I'm not trying to lean towardsyou.
I'm not trying to do anything.
(44:45):
I'm just trying to keep myselfconfident, poised, graceful and
classy.
I try to make sure my mannersare good and I think that's
where we have to be.
I try to keep.
I try to make sure my mannersare good, and I think that's
where we have to be.
We have to make sure that ourmanners are in check, because
you know us and we get such astereotypical thing about you
(45:07):
know, black women and theyshaking their heads and all that
.
The reason when they startedsaying that, I stopped doing
that.
I was like OK, this isstereotypical of what they see
us as, so I'm going to stopdoing that.
This is stereotypical of whatthey see us as.
So I'm going to stop doing that.
But you got to be able to knowwho you are and who you stand
for.
I got a comment.
You just say I'd be so sick,wait a minute, I'd be so sick,
(45:30):
it'd be hard to look pretty.
Oh, I know.
But you know what you can bepretty on the inside.
I know you go through a lotwith your health and all that, I
know.
But you know what you can bepretty on the inside.
I know you go through a lotwith your health and all that,
nisha.
But let me tell you somethingthat man married you because you
are the apple of his eye andyou just keep on smiling and
(45:50):
when you can be pretty, bepretty.
You know.
But you know, remember you knowhe chose you to be his bride.
You got to be his bride.
You got to be his bride andhe's going to love you.
He's going to love youregardless.
But if there's anybody want tocall in and say hey, my time is
(46:10):
winding down, but I just kind ofwanted to share that with you,
because sometimes we get in acrossfire or we get in the
misconception of do I have toshow all my skin to be sexy, or
do I have to show all my skin topull a man?
Well it depends on what type ofman you're trying to pull, and
(46:31):
that's going to be the key there.
But remember, if you pull himlike that, that's what he's
looking for.
So even once you get him andyou start throwing on your
sweats and your sweatshirts, hegoing to be over there looking
at Sally Sally, showing the skin.
You want someone that's goingto that.
You can build a foundation with, someone that you can build up
and grow from the bottom up, andI think that's important to
(46:51):
have a relationship that you canbuild up from or you can build
up from the bottom can build up.
And also, you know men, we haveto look at them too, because
sometimes they be looking alittle messy.
You know I I'm constantlybuying um Eric clothes.
I buy him clothes because Iknow how I want him to look, I
know what I want to see, so Isometimes give him the
(47:15):
opportunity to choose his ownstuff.
Speaker 2 (47:17):
I do.
Speaker 1 (47:19):
But for the most part I make sure I buy him what I
want to see him in, because justas much as I want him to see me
looking attractive and sexy tohim, he kind of wants the same
thing.
For me it goes two ways.
And again, when it's just you,you know I'm not single, but if
(47:44):
I was yeah, my peace being bymyself, my confidence would
rocket through the room.
But what I know now, becausewhen I was younger I felt like I
had to be in a relationship.
But for the most part, justkeep it simple, keep your
confidence.
Wear clothes that are going tofit you.
(48:04):
Wear clothes that's going to beappealing to you.
Oh, natalie put in a comment.
She said getting pretty boosts.
It does, does it not?
When you get yourself togetherperfectly.
(48:25):
I used to get my hair done.
I used to go to the salon.
Whenever I went to get my hairdone, you know where I went to
go.
I went to go hit the club so Icould turn up Because I felt
pretty, I looked good, I wasready to go check a tail feather
and sweat it all out, which isusually what happened.
But when you feel good, youlook good.
You know, james Brown said Ilook good, I smell good.
(48:54):
You know, he was feeling goodin that interview.
He was feeling good.
He was feeling good, I smellgood, you know he was feeling
good in that interview.
Speaker 3 (48:58):
He was feeling good.
Speaker 1 (48:59):
He was feeling good.
So if he can do that and feelgood and look good about himself
, james Brown, a sweaty mess onstage, gave the best concert
they say they've ever had wasJames Brown concert was lit,
sweaty, messy, but he gave hisall.
But if he can say I look good,I smell good, hey, that's why
(49:21):
the ladies love him, that's whythe ladies love him, so, okay.
So, with that being said, sinceI don't have any callers, okay,
thank you so much, natalie, forcalling, and we're going to go
ahead and wrap it up for thenight.
I'm so excited about our nexttopic coming up.
I won't share that with youjust yet, but you know, actually
I am.
The next topic is what do menwant?
(49:44):
Hopefully we can get some guys,hopefully we can get some guys
to call in so they can, like,tell us what they want because,
like they say, women are fromMars and men are from Venus.
Yeah, I think that's aboutright, because we don't know
what they want.
They don't know what we want,so they say so we got to figure
(50:05):
out what each other want.
And what exactly are we lookingfor?
What are you looking for in awife?
What are you looking for in ahusband.
So that topic would be what menwant.
And hopefully some men willlisten in and they they'll say
that's not what we want.
So they can correct us, theycan call in and tell us no,
that's not what we want.
(50:25):
that's not what we're lookingfor, you know.
So that's what next topic isgoing to be what men want and,
with that being said, I'm goingto go ahead and bid you guys a
good night again.
Thank you for joining me.
If you, please like and share.
If you haven't subscribed,subscribe, and I look forward to
seeing you guys in two weeks.
(50:45):
Oh yeah, another thing Someonesaid to me that because I
switched, thursday night theycan't be on.
I can't meet the need ofeverybody, but if you know
someone that's available forThursday nights, someone that
can watch us on Thursday night,please like and share and let
them know we'll be back on intwo weeks.
Thank you, I love you guys.
(51:06):
Thank you so much for tuning inand have a great, great, great
evening music.
Thank you.
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