You can’t truly love yourself if you’re lying to yourself.
And you certainly can’t find peace in a version of you that’s not real.
Because when you try to love a version of yourself that isn’t true, it feels empty. It’s like people-pleasing: if you sacrifice authenticity for approval, then who are they really approving of? Not the real you. And the same goes for self-approval. If we dress up a lie and call it self-love, we’re building a facade that will inevitably crumble.
In this episode, you will learn…
- Why women, in particular, tend to lie to themselves (even more than they lie to others)
- What all major religions and spiritual teachings say about truth-telling
- 3 simple but profound ways to use honesty as a daily practice of loving yourself
We’ll also explore ideas from authors like bell hooks, George Saunders, Don Miguel Ruiz, and Tara Brach, whose teachings remind us that honesty is the foundation of love.
If you’ve ever felt like self-love doesn’t “work” for you, or that you’re doing everything but still feel disconnected, this episode might reveal why and inspire you to honestly love yourself.
Remember: telling the truth isn’t about sharing every secret, it’s about staying rooted in what’s real. And what’s real—no matter how messy—is worthy of love.
Deepen your self-love journey with Mary’s books:
- The Gift of Self-Love, an interactive workbook that will help you build confidence, recognize your worth, and learn to finally love yourself.
- 100 Days of Self-Love, a guided journal with 100 prompts to help you calm self-criticism and learn to love who you are.
Follow Mary on IG: @maryscupofteaa and @maryspodcast
If you’re enjoying this self-love podcast, share it with the women in your life. Your support helps keep this show—and the message of self-love, confidence, and mental health—alive and thriving.
🫖 P.S. This self-love podcast episode pairs beautifully with:
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!