You can’t truly love yourself if you’re lying to yourself.
And you certainly can’t find peace in a version of you that’s not real.
Because when you try to love a version of yourself that isn’t true, it feels empty. It’s like people-pleasing: if you sacrifice authenticity for approval, then who are they really approving of? Not the real you. And the same goes for self-approval. If we dress up a lie and call it self love, we’re building a facade that will inevitably crumble.
Self love requires radical self honesty.
In this episode, you will learn…
- Why women, in particular, tend to lie to themselves (even more than they lie to others)
- What all major religions and spiritual teachings say about truth-telling
- 3 simple but profound ways to use honesty as a daily practice of loving yourself
We’ll also explore ideas from authors like bell hooks, George Saunders, Don Miguel Ruiz, and Tara Brach, whose teachings remind us that honesty is the foundation of love.
If you’ve ever felt like self-love doesn’t “work” for you, or that you’re doing everything but still feel disconnected, this episode might reveal why and inspire you to honestly love yourself.
Remember: telling the truth isn’t about sharing every secret, it’s about staying rooted in what’s real. And what’s real—no matter how messy—is worthy of self love.
Deepen your self-love journey with Mary’s books:
- The Gift of Self-Love, an interactive workbook that will help you build confidence, recognize your worth, and learn to finally love yourself.
- 100 Days of Self-Love, a guided journal with 100 prompts to help you calm self-criticism and learn to love who you are.
Follow Mary on IG: @maryscupofteaa and @maryspodcast
If you’re enjoying this self-love podcast, share it with the women in your life. Your support helps keep this show—and the message of self-love, confidence, and mental health—alive and thriving.
🫖 P.S. This self-love podcast episode pairs beautifully with:
- Ep. 212: How To Be Honest With Yourself
- Ep. 213: Sick of People-Pleasing? Listen to this.
- Ep. 242: How To Stop Comparing Your Current Self to Your Past Self
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