April 11, 2025 • 39 mins
When an alter ego takes the microphone, uncomfortable truths come to light. In this remarkable episode of Mature Mischief, listeners witness the emergence of Ballistic - host Jesse James' theatrical, unfiltered alternate personality who hasn't made an appearance in quite some time.
What begins as a typical Saturday Shenanigans episode transforms into a psychological exploration when Jesse suggests bringing Ballistic out "for just a moment." The shift is immediate and dramatic - voice, cadence, vocabulary, and energy completely transform as this theatrical personality takes control. Co-host DeeDee navigates this unexpected territory with grace, engaging Ballistic in a conversation that reveals layers of Jesse's psyche rarely seen by audiences.
Ballistic speaks candidly about his origins in the wrestling world, where he was a character Jesse would portray, complete with rivalries and storylines. But what makes this episode truly fascinating is Ballistic's psychological insights into Jesse himself. "He has the knowledge, he has the charisma, he has the talent. And why does he doubt himself so much? I'll never understand," Ballistic remarks, highlighting internal struggles with self-confidence that creative people often face.
The conversation takes several surprising turns, touching on friendship dynamics, BDSM experiences described in poetic terms, and even a critique of the podcast itself. Throughout it all, listeners gain a rare glimpse into the complex relationship between different aspects of personality - how they can exist separately yet collectively form a whole person.
Whether you're interested in psychology, alternative expressions of identity, or simply enjoy compelling podcast moments, this episode offers a uniquely intimate listening experience that challenges our understanding of the self. Subscribe to Mature Mischief for more unfiltered conversations that push boundaries and explore the human experience in all its complexity.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
What's up, Gremlins?
Welcome to another podcast.
My name is Didi.
I hope everyone is doing it anddoing it well.
You know the drill.
This is the Mature Mischief.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Podcast Didi oh my god, I got it.
You got it.
Holy shit.
Did you guys hear that she didit?
I was like Didi, you're doingthe intro today.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
I almost got it.
I did it.
Holy shit, did you guys hearthat she did it?
I was like Dee, dee, you'redoing the intro today.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I almost got stuck.
You almost did.
I almost got stuck.
What's up, gremlins, my name isNow.
You got to do the second part.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
What's the second part?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
You got to do the second part.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Give me a minute.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I know it.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
I it, I oh yeah.
Okay, you gotta do it.
I know it, you know it, thewhole fucking world knows it.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
I like to say my name twice I am your co-host, didi,
and I am your host, jesse james.
Wow, that's so empowering.
For once, everyone's gonna belike what did I turn into the
wrong podcast?
(01:10):
This isn't jesse, we were.
We were expecting a deepervoice jesse had a whole change.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
When they say he was feeling like a woman he really
meant he was feeling like awoman.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Dude, he really meant he was feeling like a woman.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Dude, he's got the voice down really good yeah he
really did.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
I kind of want to hear that from the beginning,
though.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Oh God, no, no, no, what, you can just keep it, it's
fine.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
It's fine, okay, it's fine, okay, fine, it's fine,
right guys?
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Yeah it, hell.
No, because last time you didthat we were like 20 minutes in
and you're like let's do itagain.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
I'm like, no, not this time.
Cool, not this time, but anywho, I just wanted to see how you
would do with the thing.
I figure, why not do it on afucking shenanigans?
podcast, so not funny it's funnybless you for you yeah, yeah,
yeah, for you, you know, it'sjust one of those days.
It's just like we've.
I've been so fucking busy thispast week.
(02:11):
I um, I forgot about, uh, acouple of appointments that I
had.
Uh, my first appointment was Iwas supposed to meet up with
master cat to have a, uh, a toysession and I got sick because I
did his recording on tuesday.
I started filling it onwednesday.
I said fuck it.
On thursday, uh, wednesday, Imet up with um mouse, uh, who we
(02:38):
hung out.
We had a drink because we werejust like, you know, we need to
catch up and kind of do thewhole thing.
Yeah, he's also part of thewhole bdsm community too as well
, and it was a lot of funbecause we got to hung out, we
caught up and everything.
He was kind of like telling me,uh, things or whatnot, or
whatever.
I was like, okay, cool, well,because we need to do this again
hopefully not so long, I'll saydude, dude, it's almost been a
(02:59):
year since we hung out.
Yeah, because he's been busy,I've been busy, so it's just
kind of been like whatever,whatnot, and I got to hang out
with Brayden, so that wasactually a lot of fun.
We kind of like shot the shit abit at the same place.
Nice, yeah, it was.
(03:19):
We didn't drink too muchbecause they have like happy
hour.
So I got the old fashioned.
It was like for like $ dollarsfor like the old-fashioned,
which is great.
I'm like, okay, cool, you'regonna tell me twice nice.
So had the old-fashioned andwhatnot, and we kind of just
shot the shit and kind of youknow, talked about it and closed
the hatch a bit.
I guess, if you, if you will,or whatnot, or whatever, if
(03:39):
there was even a hatch to close,um, then we had talked about
kinky carnival because we wentthere and whatnot, because kind
of shit just like fucking wentdown or whatever.
So I was just like this wascute, this was fine, do it again
.
Uh, because it's like.
It's like I don't go out asmuch though, but when people do
see me out in public they'rejust like, oh fuck, he's here.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I'm just like dang damn what the fuck did I do to
you like interesting it's.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
It's those who I know , who I've called out and I'm
just like no, and then those whojust like whatever showed up.
I'm just like yeah, whatever.
But overall it was actuallykind of fun.
I did, uh, I did have a lot offun.
I did have a lot of fun withrad too, as well, that's awesome
uh yeah, it was.
Uh, it felt good to have that,um uh sub and uh master, uh phil
(04:28):
, I want to say master, but dom,yeah, phil.
so it was pretty much I was hishandler, he was my pop kind of
just went back and forththroughout the entire day, um,
so yeah, it was actually a lotof fun.
I do miss it.
He was out of town, he forgot,he didn't message't message me.
So I'm just saying, hmm, I'lllet it slide.
Only reason is because he spenta lot of the day with Eric, so
(04:48):
I'm just like I guess I'll letit slide.
I was like your lack ofcommunication.
It's very reassuring you.
Okay, there, buddy Jesus, I'mpretty sure he's going hear the
podcast.
I'm sorry, daddy, I hope you dolisten to this fucking podcast.
(05:15):
Boy, I, I see punishment inyour future that you're not
going to like Uh-oh, but anywho,I could take away his cuddles,
but that would be not for me,because he's already done that
already for the whole week.
Ah, kneeling rice, kneelingrice.
I think I'll do that.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
And on carpet.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
That's worse because it gets stuck in the carpet.
Eddie has to clean it up.
So if you're listening to thispodcast, rad just kidding on his
forehead no, when he said hehas to clean it up with his
mouth.
I'm kidding he's like don'thang him on, but anywho I don't
(06:04):
have to dd.
Yes, let's change the subject.
Let's do something that we'venever done before on a saturday
what have we never done before I?
Speaker 1 (06:16):
have no idea oh my god, that was such a build-up
for nothing disappointing I knowdisappointing.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Let's go for a run.
We'll take the whole podcastwith us no, can you?
Imagine we go do like a onemile walk and just do a whole
podcast.
Just how like I mean that would.
That would be cool because thatone time that we walked around
the whole complex a couple times, that was actually awesome that
was awesome, that was actuallyawesome we could do a whole
podcast walking, being fat andout of breath, so I'm okay with
(06:48):
that you guys want to hear likehalf an hour of fat breaths um,
yeah, you know who I want tobring onto the podcast just for
a moment.
Let's bring ballistic out for abit.
Oh, dear lord, yeah, I haven't,haven't had fun with him in a
minute, and only reasons I saythis because I have.
I kind of miss it a little bit,and he's been itching to come
out for a while, so I'mwondering if I can do it.
(07:11):
So, uh, let's do it.
It's time for shenanigans,shadadagons, shadagons,
shadagons, shadagons, shadagons.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
Yosferatu Shadagons.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
Shadagons, shadagons, hello, hello, is this thing on?
Hello, is anybody on?
Hello, is anybody there?
(07:58):
Hello, oh, fuck this shit, I'mout, I'm out, I'm out of this
bitch.
Come in, child, come in.
The fuck was that I stumbled,took me to my dog Roar.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Just walking to my hotel.
Why does everybody back theirass up on me?
I have no idea.
I have first tigger, now tondra, what?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
are y'all's deal.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
They give literally and then just give you like dog
hair give me lap dances andleave nothing but hair on the
side of my that's their paymentdog confetti.
Dog confetti, dog confetti.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
I didn't ask for no dance miss.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Bands to make a dance .
The other two are over there inthe standoff.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Buddy.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
That's what I said when he was in the couch.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
I was like, sir, your breath is kicking right now you
are offending hardmotherfucking cord, but let me
see if I can do this.
I don't know if I can or not.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
The other ones over there.
I was going to say they're on astandoff.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Hold on and we're back.
We have to take care of thedogs really quickly, the dogs
really quickly.
Um so, yeah, um, oh god.
Do I even remember whatballistic was like?
I don't know, give me some,give me some q a dds for
ballistic and see if I can bringthem out, put you on the spot.
(09:37):
Damn, put you on the spot.
It's not necessarily put me onthe spot.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
No, it's not necessarily put me on the spot.
It's like what do I ask?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
ballistic what's it?
What was the one question thatyou always wanted to ask him?
Speaker 1 (09:52):
are you okay?
No, no I know the yes and nopart.
I want the rest.
What is wrong with you?
Speaker 2 (09:59):
you know it's what is wrong with you, you know it's
kind of hard to explain whenyou've gone MIA for a very long,
long time.
Miss Dee, dee, nice, you knowI've heard your name come in
(10:23):
conversation throughout thetimes that Jess has been in my
absence.
For me, and you know, it's oneof those things I'm just like
thinking Sister T, oh no, sister, sister, sister.
But I'm just like why, sister D?
(10:45):
There's nothing sweet or letalone nothing angel about you,
so why would it have to be sucha erotic name that Sister D
would be given to you, a personathat doesn't even fit who you
are?
I would have said maybe Mumskinor sister, short, uh, maybe
(11:08):
little d.
You know just, you know alittle big l, I little l.
You know little d, and it'sjust one of those things I just
find so fascinating that hismind it's very, not all there,
we're very well aware.
You know, you figured you wouldbe known to this.
(11:31):
So you ask me the question am Iokay?
No, it's been too long, it'sbeen very, very very too long.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
And what have you been doing to keep yourself busy
while gone Very, very too long?
And what?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
have you been doing to keep yourself busy while gone
?
You know I've been in the mindof this fruitcake for a very,
very long time.
The things that go in his headis really interesting.
Interesting Things that wouldmake you scream and beg for
mercy.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Coming from you.
Oh, I find it heaven.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
I find it heaven Interesting.
It makes me think my insanityfor a while, Because half the
things he thinks about doing toother people makes me go good
boy.
Makes me go good boy.
(12:29):
Oh, the people he just wants todestroy and manipulate those
who are at a pawn in his gamethis entire time.
Couldn't play the game rightand all fell down.
The king has fallen, just hasrisen.
(12:49):
He is now in a place where nowhe doesn't really need me.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
Interesting very, very, and you're okay with this
you.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
I'm very okay with this because I really want him
to experience more himself Apersona that he's been holding
on for such a long time.
He has coddled the demon, thecraziness of Ballistic, even
though the name Ballistic wasn'tsomething that he created on
(13:25):
his own, the name was kind ofgiven to him.
Everything else is just all onhis own.
He's done something marvelousand miraculous for himself.
I agree, and it's one of thosethings you try to understand.
That it's great.
(13:46):
He overthinks it, heoveranalyzes it, although he
does have a bit of a spendingproblem and I can't really
control that.
But here's the thing and here'sthe kicker of it all.
It's one of those things youjust know he's happy doing it
(14:07):
and it's not always for him perse, but in the sense it's really
more for everybody else.
But people don't realize it.
This boy can be on his lastdollar and he's willing to give
it to somebody else and starvehalf the time.
(14:27):
A big back starving is notreally good.
Look for him.
It's like a hippo not eatingfor weeks, and that is not cute
at all.
Okay, have you seen a skinnyhippopotamus?
It doesn't exist, right?
So, oh hell, the big back, bigbag, big bag.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
But although his weight has become an issue
between us, I will say that Iwill say that and how do you
feel about coming out on aregular you?
Speaker 2 (15:03):
know I would love to be here on a regular basis,
depending on where the fan baseis.
It's one of those things thatpeople are so interested in
seeing people's faces and thereactions.
And, oh my God, the people areso funny on the screen because
(15:24):
people only doom scroll everysingle time.
They want to see that becausethey lack of imaginations.
When back then, radio just usedto be a thing where people used
to talk and people forgot howto use their imaginations.
People forgot how to use theirimaginations and I think that's
so wonderful with the podcast isthat you can bring a story in,
(15:51):
you can hear the voice, and thevoice doesn't really matter what
they're really going to do, butit really matters to the most
people because they can'tunderstand or comprehend the
true meaning of imagination.
But I digress.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
You seem very, very guarded.
Is there a reason?
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Of course I'm guarded .
I have to be guarded, you know,it's just.
It's one of those things.
You don't want people to seethe true nature of the
psychoticness of one person'smind, even though the character
may have been portrayed off ofone of the most famous comic
(16:43):
books ever.
Maybe everyone knows apsychotic clown that everyone
ever, forever talks about, butit's just one of those things.
It's just not that.
It's like we can relate on awhole personal level as to why
the person is insane to beginwith.
Everybody has a hero thatpushes them to the edge, to
(17:07):
glory and greatness, no matterwhat it is, and it's kind of
like this, dd, it's like youbeing the hero and jesse being
the villain.
If he didn't have you, in thesense of the podcast, it would
really be boring on one hand, Idon't know, have you heard his
(17:28):
other podcasts?
Speaker 1 (17:29):
they're really pretty bad but if you and Jess were on
the podcast?
Speaker 2 (17:36):
that would actually be an interesting podcast.
I'm just saying somebody withmultiple personality disorders,
even though he never wants toadmit it, podcasts.
I'm just saying Somebody withmultiple personality disorders,
even though he never wants toadmit it.
But you know, it's just onejazz, but there's only one,
ballistic, exactly.
But here's the thing Stayingguarded or staying grounded For
(18:02):
a lot of particular reasons andand losing a dear friend of mine
, two in fact we lost Beast andwe lost Brimo, two of the great
iconics, people of my time thatI got to step in the ring with
and got to have fun with.
I remember there was a timewhere beast got so pissy with
(18:26):
ballistic and the reason he wasso busy with ballistics because
I decided to go out of characterand try to tag myself and to
make a good, interestingstoryline.
But people were mad.
The ring was in chaos.
People were just like what isgoing on?
(18:48):
I'm just like people don't knowtheir shit.
People were out of line.
No one knew what they weredoing.
An octagon, really how original.
Like come on, you got goateelocks over there.
That doesn't know how to runshit.
But yet here we are.
You got fucking malibu, mostgayest barbie.
(19:10):
We know he's closeted.
Let's just put it that way.
You know what I mean.
I'm british.
Even I wanted to suck his dick,and I'm crazy.
You know what I mean.
I digress, I digress, but I didmiss Primo.
Primo was one of the best, bestwrestlers I've ever come across
(19:34):
in my entire life.
He knew exactly how to critique, create a story, and the story
between me and him was sofascinating Calling out his dead
relative, saying certain things, all in the name of theatrical.
(19:55):
We all knew it was just a game,but in the ring it was a story
to portray and it was a story tobe told, and I miss it.
I miss those stories, dd.
I miss those stories.
I miss those good times, thoseplayful times when the guys knew
(20:16):
I was gay but superuncomfortable to unchange.
I admit I'm much as gay as heis, though, but you know, it's
just a little bit psycho, but Ihave no regrets.
It was a lot of fun.
I can do it again if I wantedto.
(20:39):
It's just this body of mine isnot as young as it used to be,
miss DD, but yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
Is there any other times that you come out?
Speaker 2 (20:55):
BDSM, of course.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
Of course.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
You've got to have a little fun in the king world and
you know as much as I love djor daddy j, how original it's
just one of those things.
It's just like he's very, he'ssuper soft when it comes to it
and sometimes you've got to takecontrol and reel those boys in.
(21:24):
You know, and the kinkiness andthe role play and just having
it and just time and time againafter another, one thing after
another.
It's so much fun and matter offact, the ecstasy is so
exhilarating it's hard because Inever want to leave that area.
(21:46):
I wish I can live it 24, 7.
So in this way it just feels sorelaxing in the king and just
relaxing your mind.
With every whip and crack andcrony that ever has been spewed
through one particular body, thebody is a canvas and what you
do with that canvas is basicallypaint art.
(22:07):
Just like you do, you'repainting an image.
Every scream is a tune, everymoan is a hum.
It's like playing almost.
What are those things calledthat they put on their lips and
move it back and forth?
What are they called?
Speaker 1 (22:26):
Harmonica.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
There we go, there's your sign.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
That makes sense.
Right, that makes sense.
That's the perfect playgroundfor you.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
It really is.
It really is.
But people can't handle theside of crazy because it's not
for everybody.
Every time you try to get a newboy and you train him and you
teach him and you give him alittle hint of crazy, they tend
(22:59):
to fear that the most.
It's just understandable, right.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
But consent is key.
If you can't handle it, I'm notgoing to go further than that.
Speaker 1 (23:16):
Hmm, interesting Mm-hmm.
May I ask what your opinion ison this podcast?
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Oh, do you really want to know the opinions of
one's crazy mind?
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Yes, great.
Speaker 2 (23:36):
So here's the thing with the podcast.
The podcast is very great.
It's very niche niche, if youwill.
Sometimes it can be very great,sometimes it could be very
boring, but and it's not.
It's not the fact that it'seither you or him, it's just,
(23:57):
you know, when it tends totrickle down just a bit.
For the most part right, yeah.
But I also noticed between youand him, with y'all's add and
getting out of sight track on alot of the different things that
go on.
It's kind of hard to fathom howy'all two even coexists on the
(24:19):
damn podcast.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
Don't you think that's part of the magic, though
?
Speaker 2 (24:24):
It works, it works yes, but you've got to remember
your target audience.
They want something with moreoomph to it.
They want more of what you'retelling and giving and what
you're expressing to them.
You've got to remember theycan't see you directly.
You've got to remember theycan't see you directly.
So giving more information onthe topic will actually do just
(24:48):
fine, and that's just the thing.
That kind of helps it grow.
You know, I see that he trieshard and there might be times
where people are on the podcastthey don't try hard enough for
(25:09):
him and push just as hard thatthey need to be able to get it
going to where it needs to be atop-notch level.
But it's all based off of sheerlaziness.
If you're just gonna just sitdown and let the thing do its
work, it's never gonna getanywhere.
Just because you pump out fiveepisodes a week doesn't really
(25:29):
mean much.
I mean you think let's face it,let's put reality into the
thing in itself.
But If the podcast was to workin his favor the way he wants it
, then you two need to harmonizeand be able to work with each
other.
You also need to put yourselffirst into your own work as well
(25:53):
, as much as you put as mucheffort into the podcast, and
that's just how it is you need.
You need to do that for eachother.
I don't think you realize, buthe leans on you a lot, even
though he doesn't want to everadmit it.
But you are somebody who herelies on because he knows that
(26:15):
he's been burned by a lot ofpeople and you have not yet done
that for him.
What do you mean yet?
What I mean is by like he feels, like he, that this is too good
to be true when it comes to afriendship, because nothing ever
good lasts so long in anyfriendship, and I think that's
(26:37):
just the insecurity of him atall.
Has anybody else experiencedthat?
Knowing those insecurities arevalid?
You are trying your best tomake friends and when people
give you advice and they giveyou a path that's in front of
you and you take and you giveand you don't listen to either
(27:00):
side.
That's the thing.
That's the beauty is that bothof you are on the side, but once
y'all two work together andy'all can coexist and you can
push him as much as he can pushyou, I think y'all can make a
magical thing here.
And I know I'm crazy, but itsounds crazy, but it will work
(27:25):
in y'all's favor, becauseeverybody in this world, in this
chaos of shenanigans thatpeople are, we're scared in this
world and people are petrified,even in today's economical,
political stuff, you have rights, you have lefts, you have
middles.
Political stuff you have rights, you have lefts, you have
(27:46):
middles.
You people don't know which wayto go anymore because they
don't know who to trust.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
You're absolutely right.
You're absolutely right andthat makes all the sense in the
world let me ask you a question,if I may, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
If you didn't have this and this wasn't a thing for
you, what would you be doingbesides the podcast if you
didn't want to do this?
Speaker 1 (28:22):
I'd probably be trying to utilize more of my
skill sets in all honesty,because nobody knows this, but I
have a ridiculous amount ofthings that I can do and create.
Just not all the time or moneyin the world to be able to touch
on majority of them.
(28:43):
But I keep that to myself, youknow, and I'm trying nothing's
wrong with that darling therereally isn't.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
And I think the main thing that you yourself tend to
lack the most, as you have, yourencouragement tends to be a
little lackluster at times, eventhough you try your best to
encourage yourself.
And when people bring you down,they bring you down, but the
encouragement's still there, butit's not at the 10.
(29:18):
You have it downed out back ata two.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
You're absolutely right.
Speaker 2 (29:26):
And Jess is the same way.
He has the knowledge, he hasthe charisma, he has the talent.
And why does he over-exhilarateand ever doubt himself so much?
I'll never understand.
Doubt himself so much I'llnever understand.
(29:47):
He coddles himself so much in away that you can feel the pain
from within side that any timehe tries to push even further
with creativity, every singletime he pushes, people pull back
on him and discourage him andpush him down deeper and deeper
into a rabbit hole.
And he never admits to it.
But the moment he does, or themoment he shows his talents and
(30:10):
what he can really do and peopleseem to be surprised by his
talents and all of that, I justwish he wasn't so hard on
himself at all whatsoever.
I wish he would put moreefforts into his stuff so in
this way he can do the things hedoes.
He needs to stop upliftingpeople and pushing them and
(30:32):
guiding them, like there is oneperson who he works with that I
cannot mention at all whatsoever.
Even if I wanted to, they diddo a lot of things together and
they had hope.
Even if I wanted to, they diddo a lot of things together and
they had hope, but he slightly,ever so, stabbed him with the
(30:55):
words of his voice, killing himever so softly with the words of
like.
You ask and ask, and you ask howare you doing?
It's the same song and danceyou give me, but he's just
wanting more from thisindividual, to give him more
stuff, because he's alwaystalked about how he himself
wished he had somebody to tellhim how his day was going, every
(31:15):
single day.
And then, when he's given it tohim, that individual shuts down
.
That individual shuts down.
And then Jess shuts downbecause that other person took
everything for granted.
And where is he now?
Speaker 1 (31:33):
Understandable.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
But Jess is sweet.
He can be a little bit chaoticat times.
On his own can be very shady.
He needs to work on his shadejust a little bit.
He's following his littlelackluster here and there though
, but he can definitely hold hisown.
He can definitely hold his ownI agree.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
I agree.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
I think jess is a whole lot stronger than people
think he is oh, very much so,and I think that what pisses off
a lot of people is because theycan see it because once they
push him to that limit, thenthey really see what he's
capable of.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
And all of a sudden, oh, they don't like.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Jess should have pushed him in the first place
you know, it's one of thosethings that they people see his
talent for what it's worth andwhen they see it and they want
it and they're jealous ofsomething he has, they can't
have it because they don't knowor understand the terms of a
(32:35):
thruple or poly relationship.
For what it's worth, I think hehas great value that he brings
to the table for a community.
But if a community is willingto take advantage of him, I
don't blame him for going offthe deep end when it comes to
shit like that.
Speaker 1 (32:53):
So it is what it is at the end of the day, it is
what it is just as long as noone pushes him to a point where
it's your time to shine.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Because then all hell will break loose.
You know, I hope there's a daywhere I can come out and shine
just a bit more for him, whereit's not just in a sense of a
kink or a BDSM setting.
I do see him doing more withhimself.
I do believe he can do greatvoices.
I believe he can just needs topush himself a little bit harder
(33:30):
on that, and that's always beenhis talent.
He just needs to find the rightplace to kind of teach him to
bring the breathing techniquesfurther into it so he can learn
more.
It's pretty much it.
Other than that he has it.
Who else can do notes for thatgood?
(33:51):
And the guy who was an actorhad to go get training for it.
Come on like it's almost neardear, close, but it works, it
works.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
It works.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
It's crazy, but it is what it is at the end of the
day.
But anyhow, that's my time here, diddy, and it was a pleasure
seeing you again.
Speaker 1 (34:14):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
I am so sorry for your loss.
It was Beast, was such a boringcharacter, if you will, and I
don't know how you've dealt withthat character such a long time
yeah, it's time for you to go,uh, but wait he was boring.
(34:35):
but love you, I love you, loveseeing you darling you.
Keep up and don't ever give upon your talents.
I know you are going through alot yourself and I can see it
through the eyes of Mr JesseJames what a pathetic name but
you are doing really good.
(34:56):
And just keep it up and don'tever fall short.
If you ever feel you're fallingshort, for whatever reason,
just remember you were put inthis place at this time for that
particular reason and keeppushing forward, no matter what.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
You got it.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
Until we meet again.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
Yes, thank you very much for being here today.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
What'd I miss?
Speaker 1 (35:25):
again.
Yes, thank you very much forbeing here today.
What'd I miss?
Ooh Well, you missed a wholeshenaniganshow.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
Oh shit Of beautiful, crazy.
Was he available.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
Yeah, he was, yeah, he was.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
He was, that's good, absolutely.
Good, hi, yeah, he was yeah hewas, he was.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
That's good absolutely good hi he had a lot
to say oh, that's never good no,it was good, was it?
Surprisingly?
It was good, considering it wascoming from ballistic, but when
it comes from ballistic, youcan trust it let's hope so,
because he's gonna tell you thetruth straight up just saying so
(36:07):
even if he is just a lot crazythat's a fucking understatement
that's why I said a lot crazywhile I'm pinching my feet.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
I think he was one of my favorite characters ever and
I'm kind of glad he's part ofmy personality, if you will.
I'm pretty sure he hates thewhole Daddy J thing.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
So it's whatever he does.
He mentioned, he mentioned.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Pretends to be shocked.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
And not just Daddy J, your name in general.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
Goddamn Well, because he knows how much I hate my own
name, because I was named aftermy dad.
That's right you know, I don'tknow.
I don't even know if he's stillalive or not.
I mean, he's alive.
It's the only time he evercalls me, that someone dies, and
yeah, I'm pretty sure he wouldcall me if he was dead too, so
(36:57):
whatever calling you from thegrave housekeeping oh god
imagine dude, I'd be fuckingcreeped out man, but anywho, all
right, that's the end of ourpodcast of shenanigans.
I do appreciate you tuning in tothe mature mischief podcast on
(37:19):
a shenanigan saturday.
Yeah, so I appreciate it.
Thank you, dd, for keepingballistic occupied for the time
being thank you uh, so I'mpretty sure he is very
appreciative to it as well.
Um time to go drop your ass off, because I am fucking tired
yeah, and I have work tomorrowtoo my goodness, these dogs are
(37:40):
something else.
I am your host, jesse james andI am your co-host until we meet
again on the mature mischiefpodcast on the mondays woes.
Love ya, bye.
What's up, Gremlins?
Welcome to another podcast.
My name is Didi.
I hope everyone is doing it anddoing it well.
You know the drill.
This is the Mature Mischief.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Podcast Didi oh my god, I got it.
You got it.
Holy shit.
Did you guys hear that she didit?
I was like Didi, you're doingthe intro today.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
I almost got it.
I did it.
Holy shit, did you guys hearthat she did it?
I was like Dee, dee, you'redoing the intro today.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I almost got stuck.
You almost did.
I almost got stuck.
What's up, gremlins, my name isNow.
You got to do the second part.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
What's the second part?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
You got to do the second part.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Give me a minute.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I know it.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
I it, I oh yeah.
Okay, you gotta do it.
I know it, you know it, thewhole fucking world knows it.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
I like to say my name twice I am your co-host, didi,
and I am your host, jesse james.
Wow, that's so empowering.
For once, everyone's gonna belike what did I turn into the
wrong podcast?
(01:10):
This isn't jesse, we were.
We were expecting a deepervoice jesse had a whole change.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
When they say he was feeling like a woman he really
meant he was feeling like awoman.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Dude, he really meant he was feeling like a woman.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Dude, he's got the voice down really good yeah he
really did.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
I kind of want to hear that from the beginning,
though.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Oh God, no, no, no, what, you can just keep it, it's
fine.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
It's fine, okay, it's fine, okay, fine, it's fine,
right guys?
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Yeah it, hell.
No, because last time you didthat we were like 20 minutes in
and you're like let's do itagain.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
I'm like, no, not this time.
Cool, not this time, but anywho, I just wanted to see how you
would do with the thing.
I figure, why not do it on afucking shenanigans?
podcast, so not funny it's funnybless you for you yeah, yeah,
yeah, for you, you know, it'sjust one of those days.
It's just like we've.
I've been so fucking busy thispast week.
(02:11):
I um, I forgot about, uh, acouple of appointments that I
had.
Uh, my first appointment was Iwas supposed to meet up with
master cat to have a, uh, a toysession and I got sick because I
did his recording on tuesday.
I started filling it onwednesday.
I said fuck it.
On thursday, uh, wednesday, Imet up with um mouse, uh, who we
(02:38):
hung out.
We had a drink because we werejust like, you know, we need to
catch up and kind of do thewhole thing.
Yeah, he's also part of thewhole bdsm community too as well
, and it was a lot of funbecause we got to hung out, we
caught up and everything.
He was kind of like telling me,uh, things or whatnot, or
whatever.
I was like, okay, cool, well,because we need to do this again
hopefully not so long, I'll saydude, dude, it's almost been a
(02:59):
year since we hung out.
Yeah, because he's been busy,I've been busy, so it's just
kind of been like whatever,whatnot, and I got to hang out
with Brayden, so that wasactually a lot of fun.
We kind of like shot the shit abit at the same place.
Nice, yeah, it was.
(03:19):
We didn't drink too muchbecause they have like happy
hour.
So I got the old fashioned.
It was like for like $ dollarsfor like the old-fashioned,
which is great.
I'm like, okay, cool, you'regonna tell me twice nice.
So had the old-fashioned andwhatnot, and we kind of just
shot the shit and kind of youknow, talked about it and closed
the hatch a bit.
I guess, if you, if you will,or whatnot, or whatever, if
(03:39):
there was even a hatch to close,um, then we had talked about
kinky carnival because we wentthere and whatnot, because kind
of shit just like fucking wentdown or whatever.
So I was just like this wascute, this was fine, do it again
.
Uh, because it's like.
It's like I don't go out asmuch though, but when people do
see me out in public they'rejust like, oh fuck, he's here.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I'm just like dang damn what the fuck did I do to
you like interesting it's.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
It's those who I know , who I've called out and I'm
just like no, and then those whojust like whatever showed up.
I'm just like yeah, whatever.
But overall it was actuallykind of fun.
I did, uh, I did have a lot offun.
I did have a lot of fun withrad too, as well, that's awesome
uh yeah, it was.
Uh, it felt good to have that,um uh sub and uh master, uh phil
(04:28):
, I want to say master, but dom,yeah, phil.
so it was pretty much I was hishandler, he was my pop kind of
just went back and forththroughout the entire day, um,
so yeah, it was actually a lotof fun.
I do miss it.
He was out of town, he forgot,he didn't message't message me.
So I'm just saying, hmm, I'lllet it slide.
Only reason is because he spenta lot of the day with Eric, so
(04:48):
I'm just like I guess I'll letit slide.
I was like your lack ofcommunication.
It's very reassuring you.
Okay, there, buddy Jesus, I'mpretty sure he's going hear the
podcast.
I'm sorry, daddy, I hope you dolisten to this fucking podcast.
(05:15):
Boy, I, I see punishment inyour future that you're not
going to like Uh-oh, but anywho,I could take away his cuddles,
but that would be not for me,because he's already done that
already for the whole week.
Ah, kneeling rice, kneelingrice.
I think I'll do that.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
And on carpet.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
That's worse because it gets stuck in the carpet.
Eddie has to clean it up.
So if you're listening to thispodcast, rad just kidding on his
forehead no, when he said hehas to clean it up with his
mouth.
I'm kidding he's like don'thang him on, but anywho I don't
(06:04):
have to dd.
Yes, let's change the subject.
Let's do something that we'venever done before on a saturday
what have we never done before I?
Speaker 1 (06:16):
have no idea oh my god, that was such a build-up
for nothing disappointing I knowdisappointing.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Let's go for a run.
We'll take the whole podcastwith us no, can you?
Imagine we go do like a onemile walk and just do a whole
podcast.
Just how like I mean that would.
That would be cool because thatone time that we walked around
the whole complex a couple times, that was actually awesome that
was awesome, that was actuallyawesome we could do a whole
podcast walking, being fat andout of breath, so I'm okay with
(06:48):
that you guys want to hear likehalf an hour of fat breaths um,
yeah, you know who I want tobring onto the podcast just for
a moment.
Let's bring ballistic out for abit.
Oh, dear lord, yeah, I haven't,haven't had fun with him in a
minute, and only reasons I saythis because I have.
I kind of miss it a little bit,and he's been itching to come
out for a while, so I'mwondering if I can do it.
(07:11):
So, uh, let's do it.
It's time for shenanigans,shadadagons, shadagons,
shadagons, shadagons, shadagons.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
Yosferatu Shadagons.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
Shadagons, shadagons, hello, hello, is this thing on?
Hello, is anybody on?
Hello, is anybody there?
(07:58):
Hello, oh, fuck this shit, I'mout, I'm out, I'm out of this
bitch.
Come in, child, come in.
The fuck was that I stumbled,took me to my dog Roar.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Just walking to my hotel.
Why does everybody back theirass up on me?
I have no idea.
I have first tigger, now tondra, what?
Speaker 2 (08:36):
are y'all's deal.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
They give literally and then just give you like dog
hair give me lap dances andleave nothing but hair on the
side of my that's their paymentdog confetti.
Dog confetti, dog confetti.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
I didn't ask for no dance miss.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
Bands to make a dance .
The other two are over there inthe standoff.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
Buddy.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
That's what I said when he was in the couch.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
I was like, sir, your breath is kicking right now you
are offending hardmotherfucking cord, but let me
see if I can do this.
I don't know if I can or not.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
The other ones over there.
I was going to say they're on astandoff.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Hold on and we're back.
We have to take care of thedogs really quickly, the dogs
really quickly.
Um so, yeah, um, oh god.
Do I even remember whatballistic was like?
I don't know, give me some,give me some q a dds for
ballistic and see if I can bringthem out, put you on the spot.
(09:37):
Damn, put you on the spot.
It's not necessarily put me onthe spot.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
No, it's not necessarily put me on the spot.
It's like what do I ask?
Speaker 2 (09:46):
ballistic what's it?
What was the one question thatyou always wanted to ask him?
Speaker 1 (09:52):
are you okay?
No, no I know the yes and nopart.
I want the rest.
What is wrong with you?
Speaker 2 (09:59):
you know it's what is wrong with you, you know it's
kind of hard to explain whenyou've gone MIA for a very long,
long time.
Miss Dee, dee, nice, you knowI've heard your name come in
(10:23):
conversation throughout thetimes that Jess has been in my
absence.
For me, and you know, it's oneof those things I'm just like
thinking Sister T, oh no, sister, sister, sister.
But I'm just like why, sister D?
(10:45):
There's nothing sweet or letalone nothing angel about you,
so why would it have to be sucha erotic name that Sister D
would be given to you, a personathat doesn't even fit who you
are?
I would have said maybe Mumskinor sister, short, uh, maybe
(11:08):
little d.
You know just, you know alittle big l, I little l.
You know little d, and it'sjust one of those things I just
find so fascinating that hismind it's very, not all there,
we're very well aware.
You know, you figured you wouldbe known to this.
(11:31):
So you ask me the question am Iokay?
No, it's been too long, it'sbeen very, very very too long.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
And what have you been doing to keep yourself busy
while gone Very, very too long?
And what?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
have you been doing to keep yourself busy while gone
?
You know I've been in the mindof this fruitcake for a very,
very long time.
The things that go in his headis really interesting.
Interesting Things that wouldmake you scream and beg for
mercy.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Coming from you.
Oh, I find it heaven.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
I find it heaven Interesting.
It makes me think my insanityfor a while, Because half the
things he thinks about doing toother people makes me go good
boy.
Makes me go good boy.
(12:29):
Oh, the people he just wants todestroy and manipulate those
who are at a pawn in his gamethis entire time.
Couldn't play the game rightand all fell down.
The king has fallen, just hasrisen.
(12:49):
He is now in a place where nowhe doesn't really need me.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
Interesting very, very, and you're okay with this
you.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
I'm very okay with this because I really want him
to experience more himself Apersona that he's been holding
on for such a long time.
He has coddled the demon, thecraziness of Ballistic, even
though the name Ballistic wasn'tsomething that he created on
(13:25):
his own, the name was kind ofgiven to him.
Everything else is just all onhis own.
He's done something marvelousand miraculous for himself.
I agree, and it's one of thosethings you try to understand.
That it's great.
(13:46):
He overthinks it, heoveranalyzes it, although he
does have a bit of a spendingproblem and I can't really
control that.
But here's the thing and here'sthe kicker of it all.
It's one of those things youjust know he's happy doing it
(14:07):
and it's not always for him perse, but in the sense it's really
more for everybody else.
But people don't realize it.
This boy can be on his lastdollar and he's willing to give
it to somebody else and starvehalf the time.
(14:27):
A big back starving is notreally good.
Look for him.
It's like a hippo not eatingfor weeks, and that is not cute
at all.
Okay, have you seen a skinnyhippopotamus?
It doesn't exist, right?
So, oh hell, the big back, bigbag, big bag.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
But although his weight has become an issue
between us, I will say that Iwill say that and how do you
feel about coming out on aregular you?
Speaker 2 (15:03):
know I would love to be here on a regular basis,
depending on where the fan baseis.
It's one of those things thatpeople are so interested in
seeing people's faces and thereactions.
And, oh my God, the people areso funny on the screen because
(15:24):
people only doom scroll everysingle time.
They want to see that becausethey lack of imaginations.
When back then, radio just usedto be a thing where people used
to talk and people forgot howto use their imaginations.
People forgot how to use theirimaginations and I think that's
so wonderful with the podcast isthat you can bring a story in,
(15:51):
you can hear the voice, and thevoice doesn't really matter what
they're really going to do, butit really matters to the most
people because they can'tunderstand or comprehend the
true meaning of imagination.
But I digress.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
You seem very, very guarded.
Is there a reason?
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Of course I'm guarded .
I have to be guarded, you know,it's just.
It's one of those things.
You don't want people to seethe true nature of the
psychoticness of one person'smind, even though the character
may have been portrayed off ofone of the most famous comic
(16:43):
books ever.
Maybe everyone knows apsychotic clown that everyone
ever, forever talks about, butit's just one of those things.
It's just not that.
It's like we can relate on awhole personal level as to why
the person is insane to beginwith.
Everybody has a hero thatpushes them to the edge, to
(17:07):
glory and greatness, no matterwhat it is, and it's kind of
like this, dd, it's like youbeing the hero and jesse being
the villain.
If he didn't have you, in thesense of the podcast, it would
really be boring on one hand, Idon't know, have you heard his
(17:28):
other podcasts?
Speaker 1 (17:29):
they're really pretty bad but if you and Jess were on
the podcast?
Speaker 2 (17:36):
that would actually be an interesting podcast.
I'm just saying somebody withmultiple personality disorders,
even though he never wants toadmit it, podcasts.
I'm just saying Somebody withmultiple personality disorders,
even though he never wants toadmit it.
But you know, it's just onejazz, but there's only one,
ballistic, exactly.
But here's the thing Stayingguarded or staying grounded For
(18:02):
a lot of particular reasons andand losing a dear friend of mine
, two in fact we lost Beast andwe lost Brimo, two of the great
iconics, people of my time thatI got to step in the ring with
and got to have fun with.
I remember there was a timewhere beast got so pissy with
(18:26):
ballistic and the reason he wasso busy with ballistics because
I decided to go out of characterand try to tag myself and to
make a good, interestingstoryline.
But people were mad.
The ring was in chaos.
People were just like what isgoing on?
(18:48):
I'm just like people don't knowtheir shit.
People were out of line.
No one knew what they weredoing.
An octagon, really how original.
Like come on, you got goateelocks over there.
That doesn't know how to runshit.
But yet here we are.
You got fucking malibu, mostgayest barbie.
(19:10):
We know he's closeted.
Let's just put it that way.
You know what I mean.
I'm british.
Even I wanted to suck his dick,and I'm crazy.
You know what I mean.
I digress, I digress, but I didmiss Primo.
Primo was one of the best, bestwrestlers I've ever come across
(19:34):
in my entire life.
He knew exactly how to critique, create a story, and the story
between me and him was sofascinating Calling out his dead
relative, saying certain things, all in the name of theatrical.
(19:55):
We all knew it was just a game,but in the ring it was a story
to portray and it was a story tobe told, and I miss it.
I miss those stories, dd.
I miss those stories.
I miss those good times, thoseplayful times when the guys knew
(20:16):
I was gay but superuncomfortable to unchange.
I admit I'm much as gay as heis, though, but you know, it's
just a little bit psycho, but Ihave no regrets.
It was a lot of fun.
I can do it again if I wantedto.
(20:39):
It's just this body of mine isnot as young as it used to be,
miss DD, but yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
Is there any other times that you come out?
Speaker 2 (20:55):
BDSM, of course.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
Of course.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
You've got to have a little fun in the king world and
you know as much as I love djor daddy j, how original it's
just one of those things.
It's just like he's very, he'ssuper soft when it comes to it
and sometimes you've got to takecontrol and reel those boys in.
(21:24):
You know, and the kinkiness andthe role play and just having
it and just time and time againafter another, one thing after
another.
It's so much fun and matter offact, the ecstasy is so
exhilarating it's hard because Inever want to leave that area.
(21:46):
I wish I can live it 24, 7.
So in this way it just feels sorelaxing in the king and just
relaxing your mind.
With every whip and crack andcrony that ever has been spewed
through one particular body, thebody is a canvas and what you
do with that canvas is basicallypaint art.
(22:07):
Just like you do, you'repainting an image.
Every scream is a tune, everymoan is a hum.
It's like playing almost.
What are those things calledthat they put on their lips and
move it back and forth?
What are they called?
Speaker 1 (22:26):
Harmonica.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
There we go, there's your sign.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
That makes sense.
Right, that makes sense.
That's the perfect playgroundfor you.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
It really is.
It really is.
But people can't handle theside of crazy because it's not
for everybody.
Every time you try to get a newboy and you train him and you
teach him and you give him alittle hint of crazy, they tend
(22:59):
to fear that the most.
It's just understandable, right.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
But consent is key.
If you can't handle it, I'm notgoing to go further than that.
Speaker 1 (23:16):
Hmm, interesting Mm-hmm.
May I ask what your opinion ison this podcast?
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Oh, do you really want to know the opinions of
one's crazy mind?
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Yes, great.
Speaker 2 (23:36):
So here's the thing with the podcast.
The podcast is very great.
It's very niche niche, if youwill.
Sometimes it can be very great,sometimes it could be very
boring, but and it's not.
It's not the fact that it'seither you or him, it's just,
(23:57):
you know, when it tends totrickle down just a bit.
For the most part right, yeah.
But I also noticed between youand him, with y'all's add and
getting out of sight track on alot of the different things that
go on.
It's kind of hard to fathom howy'all two even coexists on the
(24:19):
damn podcast.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
Don't you think that's part of the magic, though
?
Speaker 2 (24:24):
It works, it works yes, but you've got to remember
your target audience.
They want something with moreoomph to it.
They want more of what you'retelling and giving and what
you're expressing to them.
You've got to remember theycan't see you directly.
You've got to remember theycan't see you directly.
So giving more information onthe topic will actually do just
(24:48):
fine, and that's just the thing.
That kind of helps it grow.
You know, I see that he trieshard and there might be times
where people are on the podcastthey don't try hard enough for
(25:09):
him and push just as hard thatthey need to be able to get it
going to where it needs to be atop-notch level.
But it's all based off of sheerlaziness.
If you're just gonna just sitdown and let the thing do its
work, it's never gonna getanywhere.
Just because you pump out fiveepisodes a week doesn't really
(25:29):
mean much.
I mean you think let's face it,let's put reality into the
thing in itself.
But If the podcast was to workin his favor the way he wants it
, then you two need to harmonizeand be able to work with each
other.
You also need to put yourselffirst into your own work as well
(25:53):
, as much as you put as mucheffort into the podcast, and
that's just how it is you need.
You need to do that for eachother.
I don't think you realize, buthe leans on you a lot, even
though he doesn't want to everadmit it.
But you are somebody who herelies on because he knows that
(26:15):
he's been burned by a lot ofpeople and you have not yet done
that for him.
What do you mean yet?
What I mean is by like he feels, like he, that this is too good
to be true when it comes to afriendship, because nothing ever
good lasts so long in anyfriendship, and I think that's
(26:37):
just the insecurity of him atall.
Has anybody else experiencedthat?
Knowing those insecurities arevalid?
You are trying your best tomake friends and when people
give you advice and they giveyou a path that's in front of
you and you take and you giveand you don't listen to either
(27:00):
side.
That's the thing.
That's the beauty is that bothof you are on the side, but once
y'all two work together andy'all can coexist and you can
push him as much as he can pushyou, I think y'all can make a
magical thing here.
And I know I'm crazy, but itsounds crazy, but it will work
(27:25):
in y'all's favor, becauseeverybody in this world, in this
chaos of shenanigans thatpeople are, we're scared in this
world and people are petrified,even in today's economical,
political stuff, you have rights, you have lefts, you have
middles.
Political stuff you have rights, you have lefts, you have
(27:46):
middles.
You people don't know which wayto go anymore because they
don't know who to trust.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
You're absolutely right.
You're absolutely right andthat makes all the sense in the
world let me ask you a question,if I may, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
If you didn't have this and this wasn't a thing for
you, what would you be doingbesides the podcast if you
didn't want to do this?
Speaker 1 (28:22):
I'd probably be trying to utilize more of my
skill sets in all honesty,because nobody knows this, but I
have a ridiculous amount ofthings that I can do and create.
Just not all the time or moneyin the world to be able to touch
on majority of them.
(28:43):
But I keep that to myself, youknow, and I'm trying nothing's
wrong with that darling therereally isn't.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
And I think the main thing that you yourself tend to
lack the most, as you have, yourencouragement tends to be a
little lackluster at times, eventhough you try your best to
encourage yourself.
And when people bring you down,they bring you down, but the
encouragement's still there, butit's not at the 10.
(29:18):
You have it downed out back ata two.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
You're absolutely right.
Speaker 2 (29:26):
And Jess is the same way.
He has the knowledge, he hasthe charisma, he has the talent.
And why does he over-exhilarateand ever doubt himself so much?
I'll never understand.
Doubt himself so much I'llnever understand.
(29:47):
He coddles himself so much in away that you can feel the pain
from within side that any timehe tries to push even further
with creativity, every singletime he pushes, people pull back
on him and discourage him andpush him down deeper and deeper
into a rabbit hole.
And he never admits to it.
But the moment he does, or themoment he shows his talents and
(30:10):
what he can really do and peopleseem to be surprised by his
talents and all of that, I justwish he wasn't so hard on
himself at all whatsoever.
I wish he would put moreefforts into his stuff so in
this way he can do the things hedoes.
He needs to stop upliftingpeople and pushing them and
(30:32):
guiding them, like there is oneperson who he works with that I
cannot mention at all whatsoever.
Even if I wanted to, they diddo a lot of things together and
they had hope.
Even if I wanted to, they diddo a lot of things together and
they had hope, but he slightly,ever so, stabbed him with the
(30:55):
words of his voice, killing himever so softly with the words of
like.
You ask and ask, and you ask howare you doing?
It's the same song and danceyou give me, but he's just
wanting more from thisindividual, to give him more
stuff, because he's alwaystalked about how he himself
wished he had somebody to tellhim how his day was going, every
(31:15):
single day.
And then, when he's given it tohim, that individual shuts down
.
That individual shuts down.
And then Jess shuts downbecause that other person took
everything for granted.
And where is he now?
Speaker 1 (31:33):
Understandable.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
But Jess is sweet.
He can be a little bit chaoticat times.
On his own can be very shady.
He needs to work on his shadejust a little bit.
He's following his littlelackluster here and there though
, but he can definitely hold hisown.
He can definitely hold his ownI agree.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
I agree.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
I think jess is a whole lot stronger than people
think he is oh, very much so,and I think that what pisses off
a lot of people is because theycan see it because once they
push him to that limit, thenthey really see what he's
capable of.
Speaker 1 (32:12):
And all of a sudden, oh, they don't like.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
Jess should have pushed him in the first place
you know, it's one of thosethings that they people see his
talent for what it's worth andwhen they see it and they want
it and they're jealous ofsomething he has, they can't
have it because they don't knowor understand the terms of a
(32:35):
thruple or poly relationship.
For what it's worth, I think hehas great value that he brings
to the table for a community.
But if a community is willingto take advantage of him, I
don't blame him for going offthe deep end when it comes to
shit like that.
Speaker 1 (32:53):
So it is what it is at the end of the day, it is
what it is just as long as noone pushes him to a point where
it's your time to shine.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Because then all hell will break loose.
You know, I hope there's a daywhere I can come out and shine
just a bit more for him, whereit's not just in a sense of a
kink or a BDSM setting.
I do see him doing more withhimself.
I do believe he can do greatvoices.
I believe he can just needs topush himself a little bit harder
(33:30):
on that, and that's always beenhis talent.
He just needs to find the rightplace to kind of teach him to
bring the breathing techniquesfurther into it so he can learn
more.
It's pretty much it.
Other than that he has it.
Who else can do notes for thatgood?
(33:51):
And the guy who was an actorhad to go get training for it.
Come on like it's almost neardear, close, but it works, it
works.
Speaker 1 (34:01):
It works.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
It's crazy, but it is what it is at the end of the
day.
But anyhow, that's my time here, diddy, and it was a pleasure
seeing you again.
Speaker 1 (34:14):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
I am so sorry for your loss.
It was Beast, was such a boringcharacter, if you will, and I
don't know how you've dealt withthat character such a long time
yeah, it's time for you to go,uh, but wait he was boring.
(34:35):
but love you, I love you, loveseeing you darling you.
Keep up and don't ever give upon your talents.
I know you are going through alot yourself and I can see it
through the eyes of Mr JesseJames what a pathetic name but
you are doing really good.
(34:56):
And just keep it up and don'tever fall short.
If you ever feel you're fallingshort, for whatever reason,
just remember you were put inthis place at this time for that
particular reason and keeppushing forward, no matter what.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
You got it.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
Until we meet again.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
Yes, thank you very much for being here today.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
What'd I miss?
Speaker 1 (35:25):
again.
Yes, thank you very much forbeing here today.
What'd I miss?
Ooh Well, you missed a wholeshenaniganshow.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
Oh shit Of beautiful, crazy.
Was he available.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
Yeah, he was, yeah, he was.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
He was, that's good, absolutely.
Good, hi, yeah, he was yeah hewas, he was.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
That's good absolutely good hi he had a lot
to say oh, that's never good no,it was good, was it?
Surprisingly?
It was good, considering it wascoming from ballistic, but when
it comes from ballistic, youcan trust it let's hope so,
because he's gonna tell you thetruth straight up just saying so
(36:07):
even if he is just a lot crazythat's a fucking understatement
that's why I said a lot crazywhile I'm pinching my feet.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
I think he was one of my favorite characters ever and
I'm kind of glad he's part ofmy personality, if you will.
I'm pretty sure he hates thewhole Daddy J thing.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
So it's whatever he does.
He mentioned, he mentioned.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Pretends to be shocked.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
And not just Daddy J, your name in general.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
Goddamn Well, because he knows how much I hate my own
name, because I was named aftermy dad.
That's right you know, I don'tknow.
I don't even know if he's stillalive or not.
I mean, he's alive.
It's the only time he evercalls me, that someone dies, and
yeah, I'm pretty sure he wouldcall me if he was dead too, so
(36:57):
whatever calling you from thegrave housekeeping oh god
imagine dude, I'd be fuckingcreeped out man, but anywho, all
right, that's the end of ourpodcast of shenanigans.
I do appreciate you tuning in tothe mature mischief podcast on
(37:19):
a shenanigan saturday.
Yeah, so I appreciate it.
Thank you, dd, for keepingballistic occupied for the time
being thank you uh, so I'mpretty sure he is very
appreciative to it as well.
Um time to go drop your ass off, because I am fucking tired
yeah, and I have work tomorrowtoo my goodness, these dogs are
(37:40):
something else.
I am your host, jesse james andI am your co-host until we meet
again on the mature mischiefpodcast on the mondays woes.
Love ya, bye.
Host
Jesse James
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