-E77_Sex Ed

Traps avoided, barley, and treasure found. The Shadow Seekers start their journey to clit cliff castle.

Episode Transcript

(00:14):
Hello fair listener, welcome andthank you for following our
journey on Meta gaming by Room Propelled Gaming.
Fair warnings. Sometimes we are not safe for
work and others not safe for real life.
Journey forth at your own risk. Now let's dive right back into
Tara through the campaign. Many polos.

(00:39):
Oh, Craig. Craig.
Fucking Craig. Oh.
It's tax de. Fucking Craig to my taxes.
The Hand of Fate tosses the diceroll, spins, turns.
Oh, I'm OK, There it is. The campaign starts and ends,

(01:03):
leaving memories that become stories.
Stories flow out into the Infinite Sea, painting with
legends. Legends wash up on the shores
throughout the Infinite Sea, fading to myths until myths are
forgotten. And again, the Hand of Fate
tosses the dice rolls, spins, turns.
Hitherto we left the adventurersknown as the Shadow Seekers on
the second level of Hell Lust, where they found themselves

(01:25):
after solving the next side of the Tridecahedron in a rush.
While a quickly flooding chamberin Kaixin's prison soon to be
electric electrocuted as well, which they had found his prison
to be too heavily guarded. But they did confirm that it was
a crashed astral ship and they had beat a handful of the guards

(01:50):
in the prison before they poofedout of the fourth level of hell
into the second level of hell. They find the.
At this point the they find themselves in a blistering heat
of a desert Oasis with what appears to be a Tavern called
the Crusty Mummy, all holding hands and their torques all

(02:14):
locked in boxes. At this point inside of the
pocket Rocket. After pressing the newly solved
side of the tridecahedron, the Shadow Seekers enter the Crusty
Mummy Tavern. Order food from the barkeep
while Franklin and Faust jumped down the well in the center of
the Tavern. There they meet the Frog King,
who Franklin pays for information and not to be

(02:37):
attacked. They learned about the Frog King
being a ferryman to the different parts of the second
level of Hell via the aqueducts that he controls.
They also ask him how they get to this level's seal, which he

(03:00):
assumes they mean the Demon Queen who holds the seal, and he
attests that it requires 1000 gold to get to the castle and
1000 gold for safe passage through the aqueducts.
Plus a favor for each of those services.
And Franklin mentions that they had been the adventurers

(03:25):
breaking the other parts or seals in the other levels of
hell, which the Frog King says he can negate.
One of the favors for the crustymummy above in the Tavern
confirms what Franklin learns tothe rest of the Shadow Seekers

(03:47):
and that the that the castle forthe Demon Queen is relocated at
Clit Cliff. The favorite that turns out from
the Frog Queen or Frog King. Sorry Frog King to be fetching A
relic off of the out of the desert, which they make a deal

(04:16):
with the Frog King to travel quickly to the ruins in the
middle of the desert, at which point Faust casts.
Where did it go now? I wrote it down earlier here
too. Legend.
Lord. Legend Lord thank you and learns
they are trapped in these. These ruins are a trap infested

(04:42):
pyramid full of treasure from ages before and that they are
guarded by undead mummy Lords who used to share bless you used
to share rule of the second level of hell before the demon
queen killed all of them and buried them in their pyramids.
Ash then ackers for a cheaper price to be ferried to the

(05:07):
pyramid in question for 200 goldwith an express pass to the
pyramid instead of taking the 2 day journey there splooshing
into the middle of the pyramid after a short rest in the
pocket. Rocket explorations go well for
the Shadow seekers as they explore several rooms of trap

(05:27):
doors and killing a small group of mummies.
They also find a mimic hidden asone of the coffins to the mummy,
which Bob then take takes Bob the talking skull possesses for
a new body. They know too, that there are
three doors left to yet to explore, and otherwise all the

(05:51):
doors they found to this point lead out onto the vast expanse
of the desert beyond. Let's find out what happens this
time. This is the comments and
questions section. So we're you guys find yourself
in a pyramid standing with the newly acquired Bob Mimic, who I

(06:15):
think actually I didn't get to that part again, but I think was
mimicking Franklin at the time. The last thing he was mimicking
was myself, 'cause he stopped asFranklin and then ran over to
the middle of the room as me. That's what it was.
Where did you go by the way? I see myself here in the middle

(06:37):
of the map. Oh, sorry, I've got something
over top of you on 'cause that'sthe like the pool, like the
water pool you guys came out of when the frog came, got and got
there. I don't see.
Anything. Oh no, I don't think Agonon was
with us last time. How?
Was that? That would be why Let me just go

(06:59):
and get you. Real quick, you.
Poof into the existence in the middle of a courtyard that has a
watery pool in the middle of it and doors open all around you
leading to other spaces once I get your characters token.
Now there's three of me on the map.
I don't know what's happening. Oh shoot, I don't know where the

(07:20):
I only see 1 completely. Black.
I see 3. I think Ezra may not have been
with us as well. So you also poof into that
existence in the middle of the courtyard.
You're driving. Flash down in the middle.
Be good stop up there you can get a screen.

(07:41):
Hazard sees sees 2. Ash is going.
Wait a minute, let's snitch the air a little bit, trying to
figure out which one's the real Ash.
You'd probably notice right awaythat it was the one on the on

(08:01):
the right, because the the one on the left smells distinctly of
semen in Deep Regrets. You not Mama, I eat you.
Oh, that reminds me. Like lean down.
I'm like, you don't have, Bob didn't.

(08:24):
Have Bob, you were cutting out. That Bob.
Also for the record, Ash is a Nope.
Never mind, I'm completely wrongthinking of a cat.
Ash is a changeling Cat is a. Cat is chicken.

(08:49):
For now. For now, let's go.
Descend. Man, when was the last time?
I'm not finding your character token agena the.
Token's probably probably the old one that doesn't actually

(09:09):
look like Agena. I don't think we ever updated
it. That's possible.
Why you look like ash? Bob got a.

(09:30):
New body. Well, he can do as he wants.
And I kind of like nudge him with an elbow.
And I was like, don't you want to show off?
And then I turn into Ezra. Or.
Bob turns into Ezra, I guess. I do look good.

(09:54):
There's two of them. I can see clearly.
Now if you need scratches, I give you scratches, you give me
scratches too. Can someone?
Ping Bob just automatically go up to him and start sniffing his
butt. Yep, if.
He does. He is totally getting sniffed
back. I can totally see Bob doing.

(10:16):
That he's just. Absolutely OK with that.
There's just two Ezra's now circling in front of you, I
guess Agonon sniffing each other's butts.
Yes, it was on the circle thing if.
You. Presents.
It's on. It wiggles it a little.

(10:37):
Bit oh haggie, Hackenon presentshis Bob would probably come over
and sniff it. Why?
Is this satisfactory? Yeah, if you present it, he's.
He, he, he, he pulls back and hegoes.

(11:01):
What did you eat last? Goblin or no goblin?
I want to say it was a burrito, which would explain some things.
Burrito, I would like to. I would like to try this
burrito. It sounds magnificent.
I don't even know what it is. Imagine is it food that's gift

(11:25):
wrapped and that's a burrito, genius.
He probably it's in. Your pocket too.
Is it in your pocket now? Unfortunately, no.
Are you sure I will find it? You can wait for it to come out
the other end. They start.
Sniffing you burritos if they fit.

(11:47):
Those are some real quitter burritos.
So who's Ezra #2? Ezra's new little brother, Bob.
You see him just drooling at theidea that you described of a

(12:07):
burrito and his tongue lolling out of his mouth.
I, I take my foot and I I draw asketch in the the dust on the
floor of what it looks like. It definitely just looks like a
log, a turd, but it's everything's best.
Mom is also going to chime in and be like, I don't, I don't

(12:29):
know if Bob is the little brother.
Bob is fucking old man. As far as the big.
At that too, noting. You're the big strong man.
Come follow me. I got something.
I got it. Something for you to do.
Noting your enthusiasm. Is it burrito?

(12:51):
There might be burrito past it. Bob, what is a burrito?
Let's go. Noting your enthusiasm to, Bob
attunes to it and shrinks his form slightly so that you're.
You are literally the bigger Ezra I.
Stand corrected. The both of you.

(13:16):
And I'm like, oh look, we're allgetting along.
Let's go check out this other door thing we were looking at
before we got attacked by a coffin.
What is Coffin? Holds dead people.
Can you eat? A boring box.

(13:36):
Don't worry, I mean you could technically eat it, but I don't
think it'd be enjoyable. What do you do with Coffin?
We put dead people. You cough in it, eh?

(13:57):
Why will you are people that youwant to bury alive?
Why don't you just dig hole and put them in the hole and fill
the hole? I don't know.
The box takes it more menacing. I never had a coffin.
Thing of an event. But Franklin not dead Franklin

(14:18):
don't go in boxes. I do the little like monkey meme
eyes side to side. Pang.
Yeah. We're getting out of here
because we're alive. Ashes still.

(14:44):
So Faust is going to try and lead as Rich at the weird, the
like sealed off door that we need to get.
Through Is there Brido in there?Is there Brido in there?
I think so. Yeah, there's an undead guy to
the east. Smash door, Bob, let's smash
door. Bob would probably get excited

(15:10):
as well. Ezra wants to smash the.
Door. You know what'd be really useful
here? There's a burrito.
We have adamantine. What if we dug like some of the
adamantine and made a portable rim made of adamantine?
Because adamantine. When you hit something with it,

(15:32):
it gets a critical strike against objects, whatever that
means. Franklin, you do that thing with
big words, smaller. Ah, metal ram does more damage.

(15:54):
Give me metal ram and I will throw.
It I'd I'd like a nice adamantine hammer to compliment
my axes. Go order one.
I mean, we've got a bunch of adamantine.
We just, everyone has an allotment.
They just got to go order their thing.
If it's armor, weapons, or. That's not even fun.

(16:16):
What? So 11 I'm gonna dip my bones
into the door and then a 20 to punch the door.
I. Can.
Clear it. What was the first one?
I'm sorry. 11 to punch the door the first time and then a 20 to
punch the door a second time. The 11.

(16:37):
Metal sheets. Try and lift it.
If you can punch through it, lethim.
Never mind. The 11 does 2 damage to you.
Unless you're telling me Bob is assisting me and I can roll with
advantage. Bob would probably follow suit.

(16:58):
I don't know if he would, he would just like follow your lead
basically. But the the the 20 definitely
hits the door. But you trying to think here.
So yeah, you took two damage from the first time you hit the

(17:24):
door though, because it was verysolid.
So you probably got really pissed at it and attacked it
with a figure with that 20. You can rule damage for that
one. I'll see.
That'd be fine because it's all just straight on this one.
So my rage bonus is, I believe, plus three.

(17:50):
That's 13 I believe. Hold on.
No, it's overall level or no? It's barbarian level.
So I think level 13 barbarian is+3 the damage for yeah.
An arm strike. Or yeah, so 6356 and 814 for the

(18:17):
door. You feel it shudder in its
hinges, but it does not budget. You also probably realize at
this point that it is stone it it took you a second because you
just aggressively hauled off on it.
My first question though is I I know that you might not see the
map, but there is a door to the north to the South like you.

(18:40):
So to describe what you're probably seeing, as Franklin
mentioned, there was a door to the east.
So you ran through the open door, up a set of stairs, and
there were three doors at the end of this hallway, 1
continuing E 1 to the South and one to the north in at the end
of the hallway. We've been in there.

(19:01):
He he went, he went, he went, hewent to the door that Faust
pointed. Yeah, I was trying to lead him
like over here. We've been down there.
Nothing good awaits us there. Yeah, he's trying to open this
one. OK.
To the Ted, I had got a detective, evil, a good or

(19:23):
detect, blah blah blah. And there's an undead guy on the
other side of there and we know what the thing we're looking for
is being protected by the undead.
So oh, gesture in that direction.
So he noticed that the. Next.
Door. So he knows that stone I think

(19:44):
we have and Ezra uses his vest intellect of fighting that he
knows and remember that the stone the stone golems hated
when he hit him with acid. So he activates the primal
savagery and re hits the door again.
I'm going to. I'm going to go get a piece a

(20:06):
chunk of adamantine while he's doing this into in anticipation,
OK? Maybe just like.
Draft it to a piece of wood. National Portable Rams.
You would remember having unlocked the the the door to the

(20:32):
West in the in the room to the north and then gone along the
hallway and opened yet another trap door that entered into like
a a vestibule space just on the other side of the door that your
guys are guessing it's still locked and trapped on the left
or to the to the West on the main room over here for those

(21:00):
that can see the map. Yeah, yeah, there was like that
hidden door. That yeah, to the West it looked
like there's like an entry to the exterior and then a secret
passage that connected it to this other.
Realm Wait, I thought the door that Ash found was in this room
to the north. There was a room to the West

(21:23):
after you go to the north, but and we did the South.
That one had the mimic in it. But this door I'm standing next
to, we've never been through because it's locked.
Yeah, go through that door to the north.
Cause like I see the ash on the other side.
Oh yeah, yeah, I do see that. Yeah.
I just, I didn't realize this islike a circle.
So we have been over there just we're really indirect route is

(21:47):
what you're saying? I think if we had walked here,
we would have come in the West entry.
Like if you zoom out at the image right, the pyramids to the
to the right, and then there's kind of like a, a entry path to
the left. Not that we would see that, but

(22:10):
we looked through, you know. Yeah.
But OK. So that's so we have so we don't
need to go through the store. Yeah.
OK, cool. East is the only direction we
haven't got yet. Least, least it is.
Fuck. Don't get beheaded by the
guillotine. I'm like cast guidance on

(22:34):
whoever is in front. I cast a spell.
So. Rick.
You're trying to attack that door again.
I'm with acid. So does the 13 hit the door?

(22:55):
Just hit the door, yeah. Nice.
So that'll be the 14th from earlier with an additional. 19
acid, you start just vigorously clawing at the door in its
hinges, well probably actually to the center of the door,

(23:20):
knowing you and just trying to go direct path mode.
And you start to see pieces of it crumbling under your acid and
you start to see into it, but itis not crumbled completely.
So you can see on the other sideand there is most definitely a

(23:43):
burial chamber on the other sidewith a sarcophagus.
Not sure you would know that word, but you would you would
definitely know that there is somebody buried in it.
Oh no, he's not even that smart.Oh, OK.
Well, tell me how you perceive that and then.
Mama Ash, I found treasure. I look over it, there is an

(24:10):
undead in that room, just so we're all aware.
Is he hiding treasure? But we did sense that, I assume
the treasures by the dagger. Yeah, I mean, he's the accurate.
He's accurate. Also danger.

(24:33):
You cannot fit through the hole that you have made.
Does it? Does.
Does it hand dangerously? With Ezra, like does he set a
danger? Like it's a barbarian thing
That's like McKenna. Like if danger is like a thing,
does he sense danger from their room?
I would say. Danger, dangerous sense, I think

(24:55):
is like a reaction. It is, but you know, play boys.
Yeah, it's there. Is there a danger?
Yeah, We're not. We're not in combat.
It's Spidey sense, not clairvoyance.
Chill out. Yeah, yeah, that doesn't smell
dangerous. Spidey Sense only works.
Never mind, carry on. It definitely, it definitely,

(25:20):
definitely feels dangerous on the other side.
I would guess then to you, even even to your senses, you know
there is evident potential for danger.
Voust stick your hand in, make it go boom, no.

(25:45):
I got no idea, no. Danger.
No danger. I've got a great idea.
Atheists are not dead. All right?
I'm going to walk up and kind oflike butt in be like, sorry, I
could cast magic circle. It'll take me like 10 minutes.
But if you could see in there and you can see the circus or
the treasure, I say thing quotations, then I could cast

(26:08):
this spell because I see it and it creates a magical circle.
And if there's an undead in there, it won't be able to
leave. And then we could just pig it
from outside. See.
Wait there. Smart people, smart.
Look around, I have no objections to you trying.

(26:30):
All right. I pull out my black book and
spend the next one minute. Well, how far?
How far away is this sarcophagusfrom from the hole in the door?
The edge of it is 10 feet, the center of it is 15.

(26:53):
OK. Then I will focus on the 10
feet, OK, because that will be the center and it will be a 10
foot radius, so it will catch the hub, the rest of it just off
center. And my eyes go black and there's
like a weird undeathly haze to me as I chant black speech for

(27:19):
the next minute while pointing through at the sarcophagus.
And at the end of it, a runic circle of magic appears around
it, and a beam of light, basically kind of like a
translucent glassy look, surrounds the sarcophagus if

(27:45):
that happens or if it works. Like he goes if.
If I mean I cast the spell. OK, it it seems to go off
without a hitch. Oh, yeah.

(28:05):
Nothing else changes inside of the room.
He has. Go ahead, go ahead.
I was going to say I just I handthe if I was able to pick up
the. The words.

(28:26):
A chunk of adamantine. I'd hand it to Ezra.
That will help you break it better.
Double thumbs up and I back away.
He's he smiles, and then he starts going down again.
OK. Let me I'll display that in BTT

(28:50):
if you not want to read the. So.
Taxi. A28 and A13 Smash smash.
Yeah, both would hit and both would crit.
I guess I'm trying to remember exactly how that adamantine part
is. Actually that's what I was going

(29:10):
to go look at so. An adamantine weapon when used
to strike an object as an automatic critical hit if
create. If shaped into a portable RAM,
you have advantage on all strength checks and attacks.
OK so if you if I were able to. If we stack them together then

(29:32):
we will have a very strong door battering thing.
I got it, but I would like to know how Ezra is incorporating
that into his attacks. I believe you were trying to use
acid before, which I thought youwere.
You'd said comes from your mouthmainly.
And your claws, no mouth and claws.

(29:53):
Yeah, once he hands it like thisis better, Ezra goes, makes it,
makes it stop on his hands and then goes smash, smash both
hands like, you know, over handsoverhead, swinging the rock in
into the into the stone door. And those were unarmed strikes.

(30:14):
I'm guessing that you'd rolled to hit and everything already.
Yeah. But yeah, because it's, it's a,
it's a improvised weapon. So yeah.
Yep, that's where I was going. To like a club.
Pretty much. Only if he had Tavern Brawler.
Yeah, yes, let's say so one's critical, so that is.
No, they're both critical because all.
Both. All both grew it's.

(30:36):
Just hitting it is a correct. 4/24.
And. Then 24 plus rage is 27 plus my
strength is 32. You're able to create a 5 foot

(30:58):
ish hole at this point and Bob is following suit with you and
as cleared away almost directly a perfect five foot hole by
this. By this point with with his
assistant, he doesn't have the rock that you do, but he you see
him clawing at the pieces aroundthe hole where you're attacking
in the center basically. Does his hands become little
shovels? I wouldn't say I, I think he's

(31:21):
he's currently got Ezra. Power.
He does, but I think he also currently has Ezra brain so he's
just mimicking Ezra. Smartest man ever.
Bob is now the most powerful thing.
Around Is the hole big enough? Can you make go boom now?

(31:43):
Let me just walk through it now.Just go in, I'll make it go boom
whenever I know I have somethingto make go boom.
Oh, OK, let's go, Bob. We find Burrito.
Sure hope there's no traps in there.
As you look at the the word jam that had potentially trap

(32:08):
triggering effects on it as you examined and known before
without Esper's understanding the the the traps don't seem to
activate because the door has not opened.
Oh nice. Thank God.
That's super smart. Sure, bud.

(32:30):
Traps can't go off if you don't go through the door, you go
through the door. As soon as soon as Agonon get
the sight line, he readies an arrow and you just kind of like
peeking over people's shoulders looking in the room.
Ezra walking good with traps. Oh God.
Burrito, are you in here? Try to Christ, I'm going to cast

(32:55):
awaken on this thing. I know that spell.
So you you obviously walk through the whole Ezra looks
like Faust. You're doing so now Bob has
followed your lead. But are you walking into

(33:18):
Franklin Circle or are you holding just outside of it?
I'll be outside of it. Did did did Franklin say go?
We can go in the circle. You can walk in if you want to.
If you walk in and you're undead, you can't leave undead,
Celestial fee fade, something like that.

(33:40):
But if you go in there, it could, you know, it could get
you. Stay out here.
I. Don't.
Ezra I I I foust very suspiciously while I look at the
circle. I stay outside the door.

(34:03):
Ezra tells Bob we'll sniff around the circle and see if the
burrito is inside there. If not, we'll check everything
else in here. Don't go in there.
As long as we don't go in the circle.
You could go in the circle, justbe prepared to jump out of the
circle. Jump out circle when danger.

(34:27):
Yeah. Bob.
So is the. Door could be open or do they
just? Like smash a hole in it.
There is a hole in it, it's likea 10 foot by a 10 foot door and
there's like a 5 foot section inthe middle that's been carved
out. Agonon is going to go up to the
hole, not step through, but he'sgoing to use the side of the

(34:48):
door as cover and just kind of like lean over to stick his head
through so he can see what's happening.
It's an unseen servant strong enough to try and lift the
casket. It says it can do feet, so the
normal human can do. I have a solution.
I pull out two corpses and they'll awaken them with my

(35:15):
awaken undead. Normally I would ask questions,
but I think I can. This is the one of the least
horrifying things you've done. I keep carps as it in my pockets
and I what are people to do, what Faust wants, what I've been

(35:38):
collecting, every Corp person wekill, I understand every golf.
I'm just I'm asking you, what one are these?
Oh. Probably just two of the goblins
from the cathedral Minotaur fight.
Yeah, ones that Rizard did not eat.

(35:59):
Yeah, or or do I have a bulky looking one?
I, I, I likely if I have I have to.
There's no mechanical differencebetween a goblin skeleton and a
like minotaur skeleton. D&D wise, I.
Think on top, I'm keeping track.On top of the pile currently is

(36:20):
probably the mummy skeletons youjust picked up.
But that's that's why I was asking 'cause I'm that.
Feels like a dangerous move, so I will choose a different themed
skeleton. OK.

(36:45):
And I if I remember correctly, the goblin skeletons were
crushed. Yeah, two of the goblin
skeletons, the ones that I got in the Goblin city that I
murdered, they got crushed, allegedly, pretty quickly.

(37:05):
Not allegedly. I murdered the.
No only. I have no problems.
They stepped up by territory andthey fucking paid the price, you
know? Wait, was those the ones were
those the ones were those the ones that we got like in the

(37:25):
front door that one time is? Yeah, that's the one.
They. Stole from us, so I killed them.
They were tasty. They also tried to break into
our apartment. Yeah, later that night, they
tried to break into our our room.
You guys were all asleep, but I killed them anyway.

(37:54):
I've gotten pretty much Faust. You've walked into the room.
I don't know how you're preparing.
I know you're trying to do that.Franklin, you're summoning.
Not really summoning, but reanimating.
Yeah, well, I. Want to give I want to give them
the Faust so that he can use them to lift the lid.

(38:16):
They won't be able to leave but.Mommy and Ash just at the end of
the hallway, like they're pictured here waiting to see
what happens. Yep, just watching.
Since people are excited to run ahead, I'm not stopping them.
All wrecked. I'm just watching to see what
happens. So they cross the circle and you

(38:38):
can tell they can't leave. Are you commanding them to do
anything else? I tell them to listen to Faust
except for in cases where they are told to attack me and then
instead they should kill Faust but outside of that do what he
says. All yours bud.
But I don't say that out loud. I don't trust him anymore, he

(39:03):
said. He talked about trying to do me
in. When did I do that in character?
I don't remember. It doesn't.
It actually doesn't matter for Franklin, because Franklin knows
everything that happens outside of character too now,
terrifyingly. Is that like a constant thing
that's going on or is it like a eurythmic OK, that's very

(39:26):
powerful if I've been? Ash also is aware, yeah, also
aware of those things. But he's.
Losing his shit pretty hard. We are currently screaming for
burritos. Open the lid.
They do so. What if?

(39:50):
It's do you have burrito? One each one gets on either side
of the coffin lid. Pick it up and slide it back
feet first, which is to the Westand into your guys's direction.

(40:11):
And it almost gonna need a wisdom save from everyone, even
through the circle. From everyone.
I'm safe circle. Oh no.
I don't think my wisdom is goingto save me time to fight mine.

(40:31):
Well, Yep, if you're within 10 feet of me, you get a, you get a
+ 5. Think.
Dangerous how that dangerous is only.
For physical attacking. Wait, 10 feet of which token?
Of me. If you're within the green
bubble, you get a + 5 the. Green bubble.
I don't see the green bubble. I have a really.

(40:52):
That's interesting. We are studying on.
The Ezra does that count Ash and.
Yeah, I think, yeah, I think everybody except for, except for
Faust and Ezra. Faust and Ezra and and skeletons
of course I. Got a 26.
I'm not. A20.
I'd. Not add the. +5.

(41:13):
So mine's a 20. Mine's 17 with the +5. 14.
Very nice. I rolled.
How much? How much do we?
How much? How much do we get from you?
Oh wait, I'm outside of it. Thick.
Yep. Yeah, you went inside.
I mean I technically was lookingthrough the hole, but I am where

(41:34):
I am. Yeah, that's a four.
That's awesome. Goodbye, sweet child.
I wouldn't say goodbye. Oh, wait.
What? About.

(41:56):
Bob. Bob, Bob should also roll.
I was thinking that too. I was just reading some other
stuff, so I haven't gotten hadn't gotten to that thought
yet. Oh yeah, you guys are all
definitely for sure. That's what I was just checking

(42:17):
to make sure. So you guys immediately all feel
just this sinking sensation on your person's this year?

(42:42):
Like sinking like in water or just like?
Like you hadn't studied for the test.
Kind of sinking feeling I'm. Not even wearing pants.
I've never been wearing pants. Except for apparently foul.

(43:04):
Where the room is. Who studied studied real hard
and. I'm back.
OK, Can everybody hear me? Yep.
So you you guys all feel the sinking sensation.
Like you, you haven't studied for a test and you're naked in
the classroom. Perhaps.

(43:24):
And except for Faust, apparentlythere's actually not a saving
throw for this, oddly enough. But I'm I'm allowing that Nat 20
through. No, no, no doubts.
But you guys all all feel just like you're bodies have stopped

(43:48):
like healing themselves, like there's this sensation just like
there there's no more tingly burning each of or or any any
any of that. Yeah, it it technically is my
body. Is no longer healing by itself.
Oh God. Oh yeah, aren't you made of

(44:08):
bugs? Yes.
Do the bugs just start? Screaming Do you start losing
hit points? I don't know.
You tell me you're a God. All it quits and they leave.
They're like I'm there to scuttle away.

(44:32):
We gotta go. Oh.
Feel like we should exit that. Room into.
Fireball does, does, does. I said the room and fire funny.
Hello with fire. So yeah, Ed, and do you guys all

(44:54):
get this? That was more honestly why I
wanted the wisdom saved than anything else.
You, you guys all for the most part, except for maybe even
except for Ezra. It's appears with the lowest
roll there. Oh, no, Mommy, you got a four as
well. Even at the end of the hallway
together at the end of the hallway, you've you guys all get

(45:21):
this immediate like jump scare reaction as the mummy pops up
out of the coffin like just. Gads.
Butch in the face. He's pre prepped for this.
Well, not bug. And mommy see this?
From where they are. I would I, I was wondering, but

(45:44):
I think probably I'm trying to imagine a 7 foot tall barbarian
in that space. And I think you would just have
caught the the trip like the just the profile on the other
side of the shield wall of like something jumping out and you
probably would have just like grabbed for your axes.
You wouldn't have pooped your pants or anything but quick.

(46:10):
Jolt, we're all ready. It's there.
Oh wait to get in this room. This room was doggy mode.
So yeah, can't grab my axe, but I can sure bite the living shit
out of this thing that popped up.
I was talking more from mommy's sake and that the axe is point

(46:33):
of point of order there. Down really far you can do it.
OK, so dot dot, dot dot. Nope.
Yeah, I think that's 123. OK, All right, at that point I

(46:53):
will need, oh, let me get this up there.
I think that is actually up there on that page.
This is got to go now, a initiative from everyone.
The one thing Barbarians are good at besides smashing.

(47:18):
Unless, unless this thing's magical as fuck.
That +5 What does that apply to this as well?
Nope. Just saves.
As you're gonna 10. 19 Look at me go.
That's wild. Oh, an agonon with a 21?

(47:45):
Yeah, that would put. What is?
What did Mama get there? It's the only one I'm missing
now. There it is. 29.

(48:08):
Poor damn. Is that Nat?
It has to be right? No green if it was that right?
Yeah. Plus 13 to my initiative.
Holy hell. And I have an.
Advantage Now. Now we know why Mama is always
at the top of the order. Well, I.

(48:30):
Want to hit stuff? So yeah, that would definitely
put you at the top. Mama with Boust on deck with a
22. Plus 13 God damn mommy.
All right, Mommy ready to fight.I'll.

(48:50):
Beat him up, you even get. There.
We'll discuss later. It's.
Cool. It's thank you.
Ron. Is that like plus 13 or
something? Plus 14-11, something like that?
Maybe 12, one of those numbers? 54321. 20.

(49:13):
Exactly. So what you doing mommy?
Well, I'm pretty far away, right?
Yep, with Franklin in and Faust in between you and the target
currently. Yeah.
There's not really a whole lot Ican do.

(49:39):
Sorry, I'm looking through all my features and traits to see if
there's anything I can do, but Idon't think I can.
I do have well I don't want to hit people.
I do have axes I can throw, but there who?
Is the person again the Faust, the.
Green token is Faust, yes. Yep.
Yeah, yeah, I feel like if I tryto throw axes, I'm just going to

(50:03):
hit Franklin or Faust. Can you guys see the names on
hover over yet? I tried to add some in now too.
Again, no. Can walk.
For you is his name. Interesting.
It's it was just. Yeah, I only see mine when I

(50:23):
hover over. So wait, is is there enough room
here to get past Franklin? Yes.
OK. So then I can at least move five
10/15/20? Is there enough room to get past
Faust? Once you get through the hole
cause the hole in the door you might have to kind of like

(50:48):
Builder Faust a little bit, but I doubt he would mind at this
point. OK, so then I can get like here,
I can at least get in front of or between anybody in the party
and whatever these monsters are.Now my following question would
be, are you stepping into the circle?
Oh, the pink thing. Yeah, I feel like mommy is not

(51:10):
going to give a fuck about that.So.
Yeah, OK. Does not affect you at any at
this point, but you were you were noticeably inside of the
circle that Franklin has asked. Cool.
OK. And so then there's three
creatures in here. There are one both of the other
two skeletons you you would you would seen Franklin pull out of

(51:34):
somewhere earlier. Oh, these are Franklin
skeletons. OK, sorry I didn't.
See what they went. So I just want to attack this
dude. OK, Well, I guess I'm gonna hit
him with really odd. Yeah.
The jewel. Great acts of justice 'cause I'm

(51:57):
right here and that's 22 to hit 22.
Oh boy, going over to him now that'll hit.
Yeah. And then I'm gonna.

(52:34):
11 damage. That was really strange.
I see 36 on my side. OK, good.
Yeah, I was gonna say, like a lot of dice went out and it did
not tally. So yeah, 30. 6.

(52:56):
Yeah, 'cause it's one D12 + 5. Yeah, but it threw out like a
ton of D twelves, so I don't know, maybe.
I I would have to I have to haveto go back to the character
sheet which I do not hold up. So ignore the second one I just

(53:18):
wrote for funsies. It's not even Tally. 25.
Maybe it's the highest of all ofthese.
That would make sense. OK, so yeah, take the but I had
a 12I. Don't know.
Take the 11. I'll take the 11 for now, but

(53:39):
I'm going back to your charactersheet in the meantime.
But yeah, that was your first attack attacking with that
second attack. It looks like though too, though
you didn't roll, you have a second.
Attack. I was just trying to figure
something out. Just the first. 1.
You have two attacks. But I do have a + 3 bonus to
attack and damage made with thismagic weapon.

(54:06):
Oh, you're right, I do. So yeah, no, we'll do both.
Both those attacks and I have a + 3 bonus to the attack.
So actually the first one is 14 and then the second one is 17.
The hit is what you're at what those were or are those the?
Oh no, I guess damage. I didn't roll the hit the second

(54:28):
one. Let's let's do that.
Yeah, the first one was 22 to hit.
The second one's 29 to hit. Oh yeah, that that's all day.
And then yeah, 11 plus, so no 14+ 17, so 3031 damage total.
There we go. You lop off an arm or something

(54:53):
in in the double hit. First hit though, you think this
is harder than I thought and it's like chopping dry wood.
So you take the second hit attack and chop off the arm.
Don't want to be standing there,dear.

(55:18):
Yeah. So then I only get.
Do I get all of my 40 feet of movement or can I only just move
once? No, you can you you still have
movement. Yeah.
So I am going to then move out of the way.
So I'm not directly in anybody'sways.
They're going to try to attack, I'm assuming, and that'll be my

(55:40):
turn. But as you're moving backwards,
you would have been in range forits reaction and it just.
That's fine. Yeah, it it, it, it swings the

(56:00):
other arm that's still attached to it to hit you.
For bastard. 20 to hit or 20 is.It.

(56:21):
Does does that hit or something or anything?
My AC is 18 but I feel like. A woman.
Awesome. Shoes.
No, they just give me fire resistance.
Or mine. Yeah, it's 18 that hits.

(56:42):
OK, that would be 14 bludgeoningdamage and then I'm going to
need the Constitution saving through.
And a constitution saving? Oh no.
Oh shit, I guess the other damage would have to roll even

(57:10):
more. So you actually took both?
I reread this the wrong way. So it's 14 bludgeoning and then
the 17 necrotic. So for a total of 3131, yeah.
Yeah, I did. Point of order.
He has disadvantage on attacks. Inside of the circle it says

(57:36):
right, OK, let me double roll that.
Then even on the he misses actually with a 10 as you're
moving backwards. A day to be him, then.

(57:59):
Try sucker. Yeah, you see the air fizzle
behind his swing with kind of just this greenish aura.
Mommy. Just turns.
Around and sticks their pony outat him.
Good thing you missed the next part of that too, because you

(58:20):
guys all currently cannot regainhit points anyways.
Let's just make his day worse. Yep, that would be your turn
then, Faust, I believe. If you're done with your turn,
Mommy. Yep.
All. Done.
Got it. We're going freehanded because

(58:42):
that's what I've been doing. So the jank works.
Going to do fast bread and butter so far.
Wall of fire in a perfect circle, damage pointing in.
Oh my God. Burn, Burn a skeleton.
I just. Got them.
I'm going. To make it back safe, so are the

(59:06):
skeletons. Yeah, I was just.
About to say poor boys fell. Into a burn and wrap our.
They cooked away classify as a burrito, you wrap it.
In a tortilla. He is gift.
Wrapped. I think you found burrito.

(59:27):
Right. Oh man, telling are y'all
telling Ezra this? That is the burrito.
That's the burrito. 16 and 18 for the skellies.
And that's how. That fails.
They're probably gonna die. And they have.
A 16 inch 18 fail GE. Yeah, no 15 fails, 18 passes my

(59:48):
DC-17. So the the one kind of turns and
trips and falls out of the circle, while the other one with
the mummy proceeds to burn because it got a three they.
Can't. They can't leave the circle
though 'cause it's the. Magic circles underneath and

(01:00:12):
there I'm good. So it it boops into the the 1st
circle and then boops back in and takes the damage regardless
I guess. Oh, right, we have made the
undead oven. Let's go.
Oh. Wait, is there's resistance to
all that in? There, Yeah, the the mummy's

(01:00:34):
going to need one too. Like a good pizzeria.
The Undead Oven. Oh, the mummy got a three, I
said. Oh, this Pathfinder?
That'd be a crit fail, but we'renot playing Pathfinder.
I yeah, it got it. It has a + 0 so that was a a
natural 3 luckily. 10/21/22 Damage.

(01:01:00):
Does that does that crispify theother mumbies?
I don't have their stats up, arethey?
Yeah, the skeletons are fucked. Like they they're dead.
They're not that strong. They're poor little sad, very
dead skeleton. Yeah, just very crispy, Crispy

(01:01:21):
boys. Like a cheese puff.
Man, I just, I get one of those a day.
Man, they pull out more corpses.I'll do it later.

(01:01:49):
All right. Yeah, that's my turn.
All right. Well, Faust will step aside.
OK, so you move out of the hole a little bit that Mama has
bumped you through or a little bit to get into.

(01:02:10):
And as you end your return, you guys see the mummy or the
skeletons just burn on the inside of it because it's
opaque. I think we we talked about.
This you. Wouldn't see.
Through it, Yeah. Sorry, I you can't see see this.
Never mind. What's opaque?

(01:02:31):
The. Wall, the wall of fire.
Yeah, the Wall of Fire. The fire comes up around the the
the first previously seen through defense and the next
thing that you guys see is sand just pouring out of the the

(01:02:57):
sphere or the cylinder it actually is currently.
Oh, it can teleport. It can't teleport out of the
cylinder. It D it indeed can, if you read
through it. Can it?
Yeah. Teleportations.

(01:03:20):
Teleportations. The creature can't willingly
enter the cylinder. If it.
Tries to use teleportation or interplanar travel.
To do so, it must succeed at a Charisma saving throw.
So that's what I was going. Reading you can reverse it.
What now? You can reverse it when you cast

(01:03:40):
a spell later on. It's the right above.
At higher levels. When you cast a spell, you can
elect to cause its magic to operate in the reverse
direction, preventing a creatureof the specified type from
leaving the cylinder and protecting the targets outside
of it. So it needs to make a Christmas
Eve to pass through this hole. Yes.
Yeah. My PC is 19.

(01:04:08):
It has something, it's fugly as hell, so I mean, it ain't got
much written. Charisma isn't.
Charisma is an explicitly appearance.
Or being loved, it could also being dominating.
Yeah, I know that I've got a high.
Charisma. It's your strength of it's your
strength of the strength. But you're so adorable with

(01:04:30):
Franklin. Yeah.
It is your ego, your your charisma is your ego.
Oh. Yeah, that's better.
That's written this bump, his charisma, his ego is.
Big ego. I'm there, I got it.
Do I win? There were there were no

(01:04:51):
creatures with inside of the thecurrent direction of which it
turned into sand, but it did roll the 22.
Oh for the charisma, Damn. And it it.
Escapes. Can move up to that much then.

(01:05:17):
OK, OK. Yeah, Yeah, OK.
So it actually I'm just measuring here.
Burns. Burns, Burns, Ring of Fire.
I didn't think it could move this far, but it moves just

(01:05:40):
outside of the door behind Ash, and you see it appear just
behind you. Oh.
Shit. Go and get it.
That team your turn, Ash. With.
Agonon up and Franklin on deck. I'm on deck, right?

(01:06:09):
No, I, I sorry, you are up and then Franklin is on deck.
I see. I I forgot to mention you were
on deck because I was trying to work through those strategies.
So does Agonon's been like looking through this hole?
Does anything alert him to the fact that it has materialized

(01:06:33):
behind him like he, like a? Movement.
What's your passive? What's your passive?
Just a moment, passive perception is 16.
I'm going to need a perception role just to see then. 15.

(01:07:00):
I think that you would have beensurprised to see the amount of
sand that was pouring through the hole of the door.
I would. Have followed it.
I don't like, I don't know. I don't know.
Did you? I mean, if I saw sand moving
across the ground and it's not acord, I would have watched to
see where it went if that's whatwas happening.
I I I tend to agree. OK.

(01:07:23):
And so I'm imagining the sand kind of like rises up from the
ground and becomes the body again.
Behind Ash? Yeah, Like directly behind her.
So he's going to whip around andis he able if he goes over here,
can I get an angle on it? It wouldn't.

(01:07:47):
It wouldn't be direct, but it'd be an angle.
To answer your question, each each one of these angles would
be angles just I don't think anyof them would be direct because
Ash is directly in front of the creature I.
See, I'm in the line of sight. Yes, yes.

(01:08:10):
OK, I'm seeing if I have missed these steps.
Just a SEC. It's.
Been a while since I've played Agonon.
Sorry I don't know if I do. Well he is going to cast

(01:08:32):
Hunter's mark and the zombies orthe the mummy.
I mean. Oh wait darn it I meant to cast.
So I meant to cast it just so itused up a spell slot, but it
rolled the dice. I didn't realize it was going to
roll the dice. OK, so we'll just keep that six.

(01:08:56):
We'll remember that if I hit. Oh, I see what you're saying.
Yeah. OK.
So Agonon is actually going to step.
These squares are really big. What's a better angle, this side

(01:09:19):
or this side? It's kind of hard to tell with
the hallway not being centered on these squares.
Basically we do geometry of how the map is drawn.
I can't tell what the best what you would consider the least
disadvantage to spot. 61 half dozen The other because Ash is
pretty much center of the hallway.
OK, I am. Oh, I do have misty Step.

(01:09:49):
Oh, but that's an action, isn't it?
It's a bonus action. But you already passed Hunter's
mark on it, right? Is Hunter's Mark an action or?
Oh, that's a bonus action. All right then I'm just going to
try to shoot it. Oh, wait.

(01:10:09):
And I have other abilities. OK, so roll to hit.
Going to shoot my long Boo. Does 24 hit?

(01:10:30):
Oh, all day. Yeah, OK.
Plus this other six though, right?
Yeah, yes. Plus the other 6.
So for a total of 12 you take itin the eye, it doesn't seem to

(01:10:50):
respond. But wait, I have to read
something here. Oh, yeah.
OK, OK. No, that's not what I thought it

(01:11:12):
was. OK.
This is why we read things. OK, Yeah, you take it in the
eye. And then my I get a second
attack. Sure.
Shoot again. 23 to hit Oh yeah, all right and my Hunter's mark

(01:11:36):
does not apply to this one. Just A7 damage, all right, we're
getting. There it takes it in the
remaining shoulder. Hey, and he's going to kind of
look for flavor. He's going to look around to see

(01:11:56):
if he can get a better angle. OK, Franklin, I think it's your
turn then, with Ezra on deck. Now hearing the commotion behind
me, Franklin, what son of a bitch going to turn around, walk

(01:12:26):
towards this thing. If I can get around, is there
any way to get either side by side or fully around it?
Yes, so since Ash is centered inlike a 10 foot hallway, there is
like, you know, 3 feet on eitherside of her ish that you could

(01:12:49):
turn sideways and brush your shell up against her and or the
mummy depending upon what you'retrying to do.
Being undead, Undead being no, being an undead myself, OK would

(01:13:10):
I know if casting cure wounds onthis thing would hurt it?
You wouldn't suspect. I'm going to walk up to it be

(01:13:31):
like this is for science and I cast cure wounds at level 5
which will be 5D8. Since it's healing, it's

(01:13:52):
radiant. +6 And because I'm a life cleric, that's right.
A life cleric, It's an additional, I think, like two or
three, yeah. I was going to say that's like
extra, extra irony. Yeah.

(01:14:15):
He's a black. I tried to make like a black
white creature regains an additional hit points equals to
two plus the spells level so an additional 7.
So it'll be 5 D 8 + 6 + 7 which will be 13 so 5 D 8 + 13 radiant

(01:14:35):
damage. So I will go ahead and rule.
That as soon as I find the Falcon spell, you know.
'Cause I don't have to roll the hit.
I was just going to ask, is there a savings row if they

(01:14:58):
don't? Want this?
No, unfortunately. OK well so so pause.
We have not dealt with this situation before.
No one has cast your wounds on me either.
Read the spell. The spell has no effect on
undead or constructs if you. Hold to that for this.

(01:15:19):
And me? I'll I'll accept that and I will
shift over because I I am also undead so I would assume I would
now, but we have not dealt with this situation at all.
How do you guys feel? I'll I'll take a poll.

(01:15:40):
I think radiant should hurt the undead.
OK, but it it doesn't do radiant, it's.
Just healing magic. Healing magic is radiant magic.
Not literally divine magic. Are you going to say something
Cash? Well no, I was just agreeing.

(01:16:05):
I was like, I think that sounds kind of reasonable.
It makes sense that it should dodamage to undead.
Would you want a caveat of some sort of two hit or save, or is
this a delete undead button? I mean, technically clerics

(01:16:32):
already have a delete the undead.
I think it's a the Turn Undead feature, blah blah blah blah,
blah. Yeah, I'm trying to remember the
the there's a save for it. There's a save for the Yeah I
can't remember. What the save the channel
divinity and it's like a wisdom save against there I think.

(01:16:54):
I'm looking it up, I'm not. That much of A cleric?
Just a little cleric. Just a level, yeah.
I couldn't remember exactly whatthe save was, but I know it's a.
Right. So rules as written, Cure Wounds
does nothing. If we want to make it that, you
know, it's can be used offensively.

(01:17:16):
I'm not opposed to it. But whatever we give it, we also
have to be vulnerable. Yeah, we have to take the
opposite coin. Offensively, But I do think
there should be like a save likemaybe they could try to get out
of it or prevent it for making calls back with.
Them. Probably whatever the healing

(01:17:37):
person's casting modifier is. You know what?
Like so if it so if it's clear, it could be Wisdom.
If it's a druid, it's also Wisdom.
Hold on, I'm trying to think somebody that's not Nope.
Ranger's also Wisdom. Apparently you were correct with
your assumption of the Turn Undead.
It is a Wisdom saving throw thatthey would have to make nice.

(01:18:00):
Hey, look at me go. I think that would be
appropriate in my opinion. OK, just so long as we're all
agreed. I'm concurring.
Everyone's. Everyone who has the ability to
cast these spells stays outside of my range.
No bursty. Friends only.

(01:18:20):
On. Pho I I haven't heard I haven't
heard mime mame weigh in on it because this does affect your
abilities to the Jordan Franklin's life.
I'm. Trying to kill Franklin.
Franklin just makes a lot of choices that stresses Mime Mame

(01:18:42):
out. Yeah, yeah, Mame.
Yeah, Frank. Yeah, Franklin just stresses
Mame out, right? So yeah, Mommy.
Mommy, mommy. But I'm referring to Mime, who
is aware of all of the situations that are happening
currently because she sat at thetable if I remember correctly.

(01:19:03):
Yeah, whatever. Wisdom.
I don't know. Hopefully we have an agreement
across the table. If it doesn't involve food, me

(01:19:23):
May nor me May nor mom May really care a whole lot.
I mean, so if there's like axes involved or like smashing
involved and like me May cares or sorry, Mom May cares quite a
lot. But like me May is just here to
like, clean up messes, you know,offer some healing, eat some
food, make sure nobody dies. That's about it.

(01:19:43):
OK, so we're all agreed. Zombie Slush Fest.
It sounds like healing does damage to undead as radiant
damage if they do not succeed a Wisdom saving throw.

(01:20:05):
Gulp. OK.
Thumbs up. Yep, thrilling.
Oh, that guy's democracy in action.
We're killing. I'm in danger.
Right, we're fucking on it. You're fine.

(01:20:27):
Prime example kick out of 10. Yeah, so I rolled 24.
So 24 + 13 is a #3737 points of radiant or healing magics.

(01:20:48):
Would we say that her or at least accommodating the rules
that if it succeeds on the save,it would only take half that
damage? Yes, for Franklin's sake.
That feels fair, yeah. It did.
It did not What? You would normally do on like a
on a on a a spelled shave like this Socket Saber sucks are

(01:21:13):
normally cantrip only. So this one failed, so it took
all 37 damage. How are you killing it?
Oh, how am I killing it? Yeah.
I guess it will take the form ofme, I'll, I'll place my hand on

(01:21:35):
it and look deeply into its eyesbecause I totally understand
this thing. And I look at it and I say,
hopefully I don't ever tear it to you.
And I send forth my my swarm andthey they transfer from me to it
completely covering it, completely devouring it except

(01:21:55):
for one portion, maybe like it'schest or like an arm or
something like a leg, like a nice chunky meaty bit where it
perfectly carves out a burrito shaped portion and it presents
it to Ezra as this thing dies. That's that's how I kill it.

(01:22:23):
As the as your hand hovers over top of it, trying not to touch
the radiance that is coming off your hand of it healing and its
wounds trying to seal itself back together, but instead
ripping themselves apart. And you grasp the remaining

(01:22:44):
forms of it as it as the light flashes away, you see you can
kind of wrap the edges of some of its husk of itself into the
burrito form and around a slowlybeating heart in the center of

(01:23:05):
it. I take one small bite of the
beating heart and pass it to Ezra as we share this beautiful
burrito and ioffer it to the. Other if anyone.
If anyone wants a bite before Ezra eats the whole thing,

(01:23:26):
there's this delicious mummy burrito.
Mummy, it's. Super undead probably is bad for
you. Ezra sees you trying to offer it
up and he basically kind of swallows your hand a little bit.
I guess I'll I'll make I'll makea one for Ezra and one to share

(01:23:47):
just in case anyone wants it. Maybe not heartworm, I guess.
Oh OK, yummy. The Asher's gonna pass.
Ezra and I can. Share the heart.
Yeah, looks like you guys are enjoying it.
Oh, thanks. And then Ezra licks your licks
your fingers. I think the resounding silence

(01:24:14):
means no one else is trying to partake in the burrito or.
Yeah, it's up for grabs, guys. Bob Burrito Swallow.
Fire and look inside the casket.Does Bob immediately eat this
burrito? Bob does come up and start

(01:24:34):
sniffing at the crumbs because he probably was just right
behind Ezra and was like oh and starts licking Franklin's palm
just Yep, 100. Percent bud, get it there.
You were kind of echoey in back in the background there, but I
think I heard. You that was up.

(01:24:54):
I'm going to look inside the sarcophagus.
Yeah, that's what I thought I heard.
You look inside the sarcophagus and directly under the dusty
outline of the mummy you see a singular key.
Did you find more burritos? I'm taking the key and is there

(01:25:23):
anything in here that looks likeit belongs to it?
It does not. There is nothing else in the
coffin. You examine the key though, and
you realize that the end of it, where there would usually be the
prongs that would be inserted into the door, are Dick shaped.

(01:25:50):
Does that make it a Dick in a box?
Hey, but. Did it follow the steps?
Put the Dick in the box. I'm going to there's a locked
door right outside this one, correct?
There are two. See if they work.

(01:26:11):
Are you going to answer Ezra when he asked if you found a
burrito? He is.
He is about other business rightnow.
You get to the door, try to prime the key to the hole and it
doesn't stick. The Dick seems too big.

(01:26:32):
Both of them. Both of them.
Just shove it in key will fit. You got to warm it up first.
Look at. That Hakatua.
Yes, Hakatua. Stupid.

(01:26:56):
I was just looking at the lot ofyou.
Why were you sent to different levels?
Why were you not sent here? I found everyone and then I got
pets and then I got food and then I got more pets.
I got more food. We need to find what this key

(01:27:18):
goes to. Do we though?
Isn't that, is this the object that we're getting for the guy?
Wait, maybe one of the other twodoors that are here, Right?
There's two more doors. Do you want me to open door,
Franklin? I I don't have the keypad.

(01:27:41):
I open door Ezra way smart way. Or any other keys that I'm
goddamn is it the statue? There does not seem to be any
other key holes, even the statues in main room or inside.
So upset. If it was a female statue with a
vagina, I was going to be so upset.

(01:28:06):
Wait, is there a male statue missing the fetus?
Missed opportunity right there. Or used the male statue.
There does not appear to be any phallic statues missing their
phallic. I mean, it doesn't need to be
missing 1. We do have to go to Cliff

(01:28:29):
Castle. Oh, wait, what were we sent here
to get? We were sent here to get.
Something of value A. Relic, yeah.
Is this? Invaluable.
I mean, it's a, it's an old fucking key, right?
Mama. Fucking key.
Exactly what this? Mama, I said most important

(01:28:51):
things to find Clara. We find clitoris.
No idea what you just said, never seen it before.
Mama asked. It very important to research
studies that that it doesn't exist.
Mama asked. No lies, she say.

(01:29:11):
Important. You poor, poor souls, you're all
missing out so much. Bob.
There are there are two doors still locked and.
The key is not one either of them the.
Key doesn't work on. Either of them let me go and I'm
going to inspect the the 1st store and see if I can unlock it

(01:29:34):
or I'm gonna check it for traps first before I try to unlock it.
Investigation. Literally every door has been
trapped. Yeah, Mommy's gonna just like
adjust her to the room, be like,can't why don't you use one of
your like magic shit to look andsee if we can open it And like,
since what is not having a key stopped us?
It I can't. Open it but it will be loud and

(01:29:55):
will waste my spell slots. Oh, I have key and Ezra holds up
the the chunk of metal that Franklin gave.
Him. Oh, the first one.
Was in every puzzle is barbarian.
Perfect. Yeah, it was a stop in.
Yeah, I see. I seen it started with an I as
well, and I thought that was your investigation.

(01:30:16):
And I was like a 36. Holy shit.
But a nine, it's a whole different story.
Tracks. Yeah, so.
Like barbarian ever. You don't notice a way to disarm

(01:30:38):
the trap currently that you're looking at, but you know both of
these doors from previous inspection are trapped and I.
Thought we had inspected. That.
We'd left them alone. Yes, and this door seems to be
lined around the outside of it with if it were the the trap

(01:31:02):
that you remember seeing. Like I said, you don't have any
idea of how to disarm it now, but you you see that there is
obviously a shiny edge above that slides into the frame.
If this door were to open, wouldact as a guillotine.

(01:31:26):
Right. That's sad.
We. Were talking about.
Pre guillotine there. Mama Ash, I have an idea.
What is it? What are?
You lazy boy, don't hurt yourself.
Bob turn into a key. What's the fair point?

(01:31:48):
I'm like Bob, can you? Can you turn into a key?
It's a solid point. He just kind of stares off into
space for a while. I will find you a burrito.
Bob, you're do everything guy now.
Lean down to Bob because he's still in like his little doggy

(01:32:11):
form, right? He is.
Yeah, I'm just going to lean down and kind of put both of my
hands on the side of his face and just kind of like, shake his
little head back and forth, but kind of like giving him a view
down my shirt. Like, hey, do you know how to
open this door? Do you know how to disarm this

(01:32:31):
trap? And I just like kind of like
jiggle my chest a little bit. This tail starts wagging
vigorously. Does Mama?
Roll my eyes and cast knock. I roll my eyes and cast knock.
God. Damn it.
On the door. It's thematic of the floor bruh.

(01:32:59):
Haven't Faust is miserable. Well, you're not having a good
time. I say this while I distract this
smaller dog with boobies. Ezra is looking at what is what
is so, what is so good, so good?What are you looking at?
What are you? What are you looking at?

(01:33:19):
What is? What is?
Why are you so happy? Why are you happy?
Leslie looks at friggin Ash deadpan, confused.
I'm Ash. Why is he so excited?
You brought, you brought a, you brought an asexual man to the
fucking level of lust. How do you expect this to go?

(01:33:46):
I look at, I look at Ezra and I'm like, Bob likes multiple
different kinds of treats, not just something that's good to
chew on or that tastes good. At this point, Bob is just just
like slack draw jaw, tongue lawling, drool coating his fur.

(01:34:08):
Ezra looks at Bob. What are these treats?
Tell me what are treats? Again, I shake Bob's head and
I'm like, hey, can you open the store?
Do you know how to disarm this trap?
You can play with these later, but we got to get through this
door right now. Yeah.

(01:34:31):
So you hear a click in the door noting, notably noting to you
boust that the door is unlocked and can be moved opened.
I'm going to step way out of theway of this door.
I motion at Ezra after you. Ezra enter door fast way, smash

(01:35:00):
the door. Now just just for it to.
Remind me, which door is it? To the South.
OK it. Is.
So you Ezra, go up to the door and pounce on it.

(01:35:22):
Yep, fur missile. It opens without resistance.
I am going to need a Dexterity saving throw.
Woo Hoo I. Get it?
That's when you get dangerous sense.
Yep, be nice to me. Oh please.

(01:35:44):
Oh please. This is what Barbarians are for.
When you don't have a rogue, have the barbarian trigger the
trap. 13. We're not in combat anymore,
correct? No, you are not in combat.
I just still see the turn order.I never goes away if you double

(01:36:06):
click it, it just goes transparent for me.
I can close it off I I generallyleave it on because then I I
generally forget to bring it up otherwise.
So what amazing thing likes to touch me?
I am going to roll here shortly.The only thing good about being

(01:36:36):
a barbarian is we take half of all the naughty.
Unless it's emotional, then we take all of it. 37 Is it
emotional? Tell me it's not emotional.
It is not. It is magical.
But slashing. You said 363737 cuts in half.

(01:37:03):
I can't think of 1819. Thank you. 19 would.
You roll down. I I rolled down.
OK, then it was 18. I got it.
The tip of your tail gets is what's that?

(01:37:30):
What's that termed in dog in in dogs?
Docked. Docked.
Docked. Oh oh.
What? Now, is the dog's going to throw
all his balance off? Make it to the other side of the
door though. Is that like a permanent thing?

(01:37:51):
Yes, and. When he does, when and when he
does, he's going to go from doggy mode to very angry large
werewolf mode. Somebody is getting fucked up.
We just took my tail. On the other side of the door,

(01:38:14):
after the guillotine closes, it's taking a path of the space,
so there is like a three foot bythree foot opening that people
could squeeze through above the.Guillotine itself.
I'm in the right spot, right? It's the one with the looks like

(01:38:38):
a sideways E. Yeah.
Yeah, I can see what you're talking about.
Yeah. Yeah, Ezra bellows out.
Who put that in the door? You come out right now or I come

(01:38:59):
in and I beat you. Or is it general lack of sound
after you say that? He'll be further in Ezra, likely
with another burrito. Come on.

(01:39:21):
Ezra is super nettle right now. Looks like Faust and Ezra are
going up the stairs. Did you lose your tail then?
Yes, he is super pissed. I pick it up, maybe we could do

(01:39:41):
something with it. Franklin wraps it in a burrito.
I don't think Franklin. Fix my tail.
We'll try it, bud. Dirt.
You do, Frankenstein monster. It'll be great, yeah.

(01:40:08):
It's all coming together now. It was just the tip.
Yeah. Just heal him and he grows it
back and then we have this extratail tip.
Could we clone him? Is cloning a thing we have done
in this game yet? Should we try?

(01:40:29):
Not yet. Not yet.
It's. Give me a number of levels and I
can do that, but I'm not there yet.
I think it's an eighth level spell.
OK, we'll keep it on. Ice until then.
I've got a plan the. Healing would not regenerate the
tail, it would just stop the bleeding.

(01:40:50):
Yeah. There is a spell that can though
rejuvenation body parts. Or we find a big snake, we cut
its tail off wherever that it starts and we stick it on Ezra
and then he'll and then he'll have a snake tail.

(01:41:14):
Same. So.
Snake tail. Would that be helpful?
I feel like it would be. It's not.
Chimera, Ezra. Ezra want his tail if fluffy.

(01:41:35):
So does everyone go go up the stairs?
Ezra's marching to find somebody's ass to beat.
He's on a warpath. Yes.
The only person that I haven't heard from for sure are Ash and

(01:41:57):
Mommy of whether or not they go up the stairs.
Yeah, I'm going to. Go.
All right, guys, Meander up the stairs.
As we're leading the way into what appears to be the upper

(01:42:21):
balcony of the area where you were.
Just below the where, you can see that the light that was
illuminating the area you were in seems to be pouring in from
small slits in the sides of the pyramid that were hidden just in

(01:42:41):
between the facets of the rock. And oh, why is this not showing
up? I put it in early.
Like a rock. Like a rock, like a rock.
Like a. Rock.

(01:43:01):
Ford. Does Ezra?
I want those. Magical boxes again.
I mean, burrito box to go. If they want to address.
Not currently. We're more likely to get a
sponsorship from Adam and Eve then.

(01:43:25):
Warming sensations for him and her.
Ribs for her. Pleasure.
I. Don't know.
Does that look like one of thosetreasure boxes that you seen
earlier in the center of the room?
Not in the center of the room, but far to the east, under one

(01:43:51):
of the sort of light perforatingblocks off to the right side of
the room. There seems to be a chest.
Also to the South and north of the room, as you guys walk up to
the set of the stairs reorienting yourselves, there

(01:44:11):
seems to be, for whatever reason, some paraphernalia of
perhaps the mummy that was entombed here, some of which
being jewelry, armor, weaponry not line the walls I want.

(01:44:34):
To do the Pharaoh dance. Yeah, I would like to cast the
tech magic. Stuff.
Yeah, I kind of want to investigate and see if there's
anything. I'm not touching anything from a
mummy until I know if it's cursed.
That's fair. Your first response is a flash

(01:44:59):
of light Faust from everything around you, and you kind of
blink a couple times to reorientand see that the heaviest light
from a source seems to be comingfrom the chest itself.

(01:45:23):
The items all do glow faintly, but the room itself seems to be
enchanted. I'm going to inspect and see if
we can open that chest with the weird penis key.
Cat. What sort of magic was it?
That is an important question. I do get to know what school of
magic. I know I'm going back to my pins

(01:45:44):
currently because I always forget this.
Come on.

(01:46:12):
Apparently. We learned how to have sex in
D&D before we learned what colors magic was.
Yep, just just. Can't confirm.
Sounds about right. Black is necromancy, white is
divination. Green.

(01:46:33):
No, not green. Purple I want to say is.
Enchantment. I don't have vocation.
No, no, blue's the vocation. Blue blue evocation.
Purple's enchantment, I'm prettysure.
I don't have an. Enchantment.
Perhaps I don't have an enchantment.
I guess this. The schools that I have are
Abjuration, Conjuration, divination, enchantment, which

(01:46:57):
is silver or teal. Maybe that's where you're
getting the green. There was, there was, there were
different trains of thought there I guess.
Evocation, illusion, necromancy,and transmutation are the
varying schools of magic that I have currently, I guess.
And the whole room seems to be aslight offset of silver or green

(01:47:26):
teal tea for enchantment. The whole room, however, all of
the items seem to have a kind ofrainbow hue, whereas the chest
itself seems to have a solid leafy green of conjuration.

(01:47:55):
Wait, what it what color were onthe items?
Everything around the room is rainbow or a little bit of
everything. Are you saying each individual
object is rainbow or combined their multiple colors?
Each individual object has a bitof a rainbow hue.

(01:48:15):
Too fast. Oh.
My. I'd be wary of cursed, but
everything in here is magical. I'm going to inspect the chest
and see if the key it will accept the key.
Is there anything that can Ezra can put his frustration into?

(01:48:39):
You could jump off of the edge of the balcony onto the
remainder of the the sarcophagusand skeletons below.
I don't know. Yeah, do like a.
Flying body press or were the plants off to the left side of
or West side of the room? He goes and smashes all the
plants. So angry, so man.

(01:49:01):
They were doing beautifully until you came along, but they
are dead now. They are all gone.
All plants are dead. Gone with the wind.
The key does not seem to fit this lock.

(01:49:23):
Is the chest another lock or? Is it open?
Does anyone try is? There another there's another
sarcophagus in range. There is just this sarcophagus
that you guys had seen before below.
Oh, do we have? That we I thought we opened that
one. Do we have a row?
It is, it is open, it's me, it'sI just couldn't update the map

(01:49:47):
for this map. Oh, OK.
I want to check for traps. I actually, that's what I was
doing. I rolled an investigation but
hold on, I forget what it was. Oh.
I rolled 19 for. Investment 19 Ash gets a

(01:50:13):
familiar sense from this chest, but it does not seem to be
trapped. That's what I was.
Going to say I was like this. This chest has given off some
strange but similar vibes. And a strong conjuration magic.

(01:50:37):
Oh it's yeah, fuck it, I'm goingto try and open it.
I take a step back. I make sure that he's within 10
feet of me and cast guidance on him.
Is it? Is it with?
Is it something that Ezra can punch?
If it's a mimic, yes. Sitting here thinking, not
curiosity. Going to win with fast.
That's one of those key traits. Motherfucker will do stupid shit

(01:51:00):
in the name of learning. Ezra is going with you to punch
it if you eat it. Open the chest and inside you
see nothing but gold and platinum bars for days.
Can I see that from where? I am, I kind of lean down to to
Bob. You see a glint do.

(01:51:21):
You recognize this guy? His chest.
Hey, man, you're you're, you're a mimic now.
Do you know this guy? He's also a mimic.
He maybe know each other. I would like to inspect the
goals inside. I would like to inspect the

(01:51:42):
material inside, yeah. How are you inspecting it?
Is it permanent? I with the conjuration
enchantment? I am highly skeptical of the
actual value of this gold and platinum.
Are you trying to touch it then or Yes?
Ezra wants to touch it. He'll touch it for you.

(01:52:04):
No, I got it. All right, Ezra wants to hurt
people. You go to touch it and as your
finger presses into it even evenharder than it should, probably

(01:52:24):
because you're, you're just making sure that it's solid and
you feel this cold, resonating feeling of what a solid bar of
platinum or gold, whichever you're touching first, should
feel like. Definitely curse gold.
Got to be. It's like the curse of Cortez or
whatever the fuck you call that.Conjuration magic I'm.

(01:52:52):
Maybe they conjured the money. Yes, but.
This is imaginary money, isn't it?
Wait, wait, wait. Ezra leans close to the, leans
close to the. It looks at it real closely.
Goes. You are bad.
A bar. And you want to try to eat me?

(01:53:15):
Go. Let's go right now.
And. Is the bar by himself magical?
It does not appear to be and Bobwhispers back to Ash.
At this point of saying I, I don't know what you mean
Mistress, but it it doesn't seemto be a mimic.
I think I have an idea of what this is.

(01:53:38):
I straighten up and I walk over to the chest and hold on, give
me a SEC. I walk over to the chest and in
my mind I'm going to imagine something.
Let me go. Let me go look it up because I

(01:54:02):
think, I think I know what this is.
If you're right, holy fuck. If you're wrong.
We can't give this to the guy. This could not be what we give
him. What does this no.
I don't think this is something.Ezra is dreaming so hard.
This is what if it's what you say it is.

(01:54:25):
I have no idea what we think. This is food.
Endless food. Endless food.
Endless pimp preachers. For mommy chimes in print gold

(01:54:46):
and says she already has or theyalready have endless food.
Wait, what? What Don't?
Know what this box does? Believe in this devot.
This chest either conjures your desires or conjures gold.

(01:55:09):
I'm going. To share.
It seems to be full of gold. You're going to what, Ash?
Sorry. I'm going to share a picture
real quick. OK.
But I am on my laptop so I only have one screen to work.
With give me a moment so franklythe conjures let the opener
desires. It would have opened the God.
It would have opened to be the goddamn door for this penis key.

(01:55:33):
This fucking penis key. It does the best with what it
has. So I walk over the chest and in
my mind I pictured this item, this belt.
I reached down into the chest tosee if it's there.

(01:55:54):
What appears to happen to everyone else is the chest
closes on your arm, dealing no damage to you so you don't see
any. You don't don't scream out or
anything Ash, but as it opens back up, some of the bars of
gold and platinum are disappeared and this appears in
its place adequate to its. Oh.

(01:56:20):
I pull out pink milk. It's a dagger.
It's a vending machine. Ezra shuts the the lid and
thinks of the biggest. No.
Ham Hock and and and and and maybe a big fat pimp preacher
stuffed. Just saw his silver platter with

(01:56:42):
an apple in his mouth. If it is, I think that you have
to feed it. I think you have to give it gold
equivalent to the value of the object you're getting.
Hopefully a. Stuffed pimp preacher.
'S vending machine. I look at the bottom of this
chest, does it seem like you could pick it up?

(01:57:03):
You should roll probably an investigation first guidance on
yourself. I'm fair check to follow.
Oh, go ahead. Yeah, if you're doing that
yourself, not great. Plus 1D. 4 Plus 1/14/20. 7 This

(01:57:25):
is sweet. Oh, Jesus, Modella, I'm Jesus.
With a 13 you don't see anythingattaching the chest to the floor
itself. With a 27 you would be fairly
certain Faust that you're previous assumption is true that

(01:57:51):
you put monetary value into it and it will create objects
relative to that monetary value.Look at Ash, then we get a shit
ton of rubies from the other floor.
I say Oh yeah, and I kneel down,take my backpack off my back and

(01:58:13):
just start rooting around in it.And I just pull out a handful of
rubies and amethysts. Ezra puts his hands out and
gives you Howdy, howdy puppy face.
Howdy puppy face. Ezra, we are in hell.
Ezra is very angry. He needs soothing.

(01:58:34):
The objective is to escape. That's true.
I put 5 amethysts and three rubies into.
Your hands. We really need to not waste
resources on frivolity. Like a fast you're Ezra sticks,
right? Ezra sticks his hand in the
thing and wishes for a freaking door with a penis.

(01:59:01):
No, y'all said that's what he needed, a door with a penis.
And that's what Ezra thought. Do I get a door with a penis?
I mean they all got knobs. I'm going to fucking send him,
I'm going to cast banishment on his, and I'm going to pray that

(01:59:23):
he doesn't come back. Yeah.
Wait, I will just go back to tariff.
I'd give a ticket home. If only that was how it worked.
It is. You.
Go back to your of existence. You go back to your own plan of
existence. Go.

(01:59:44):
To Hell. Hell is your only plane of
existence now. That's where you belong.
So many things. Wow.
Guys, I I step up, we could get an item that would let us shift
planes if we put all our money in maybe.
Wait, did I get my penis door? If.

(02:00:06):
Anything happened? I feel like it would have to fit
inside the chest. I would I would just have to
follow the whole recourse of action there did so that was
that that actually happened right like what what was
described there, OK. He really?
With amethysts and emeralds in his hand.

(02:00:26):
And. Conjured up a penis door in his
mind. Right.
Well y'all said the door had a penis on it.
For a key I'm looking a no. I'm looking for a door within
this tomb which a penis key would open.
So you get a singular portrait fine oil brush painting of what

(02:00:55):
looks to be a set of legs on either side of a very finely
made chastity belt with a penis hole and spikes.
On either side. Chastity belt the the I swear of
this key is the key is what we were after.

(02:01:17):
The Queen is wearing a chastity belt.
Did. We just wait.
Did we just come in the chastitybelt?
On the chest. Ezra looks at the.
Pictures that oil painting. Did I cut out or did just see
you cut out? I'm going to fucking kill
myself. Did I cut out?
I'm sorry. That's right, she was.

(02:01:39):
Wearing a chance to be refused that is not APP door.
I mean, it technically is just not the typical door that you
typically see. This is a door of another kind.
But it is, yes, it is a door. Ezra smashes doors that does not

(02:02:01):
look like door. How does Ezra splash that door?
Oh my goodness, I feel like Bob's going to try to corrupt
Ezra so much. Bob turns to to Ezra and says
you got to get a bigger stick, sometimes it likes yellow.
Why does the color of stick matter?

(02:02:23):
You just smash the door. You beat I don't know how hard.
Becky. Becky just likes yellow.
Becky just likes yellow. I turn.
I look at. Him What is a Becky Becky?
Please. I just put my hand on my hip and
just look down and Bob like who the fuck is Becky?

(02:02:44):
Let me. Smash What the?
Fuck, is this Becky lady? Let me smash.
Oh my God. So Mama Ash, what we have to do
is I I find this lady and I smash her right last.

(02:03:06):
Year we. Were in the Hilton God.
Bless if you down. May the gods take my gold and
cash it into damnation as I pickup The Jets and begin to walk
away, I think. I.
Think you are here? I think you are in damnation.
This is damnation for you. Then you roll a thing that said
you found something at like you are counted the chest that it

(02:03:26):
was trapped. No that I are counted the chest
in the. My assumption that you put in
monetary value and get out something of equivalent value is
correct. Oh fuck yeah, we're keeping the
chest. We're keeping the fuck out of
this chest. We're keeping this chest.
We're taking this baby home. Do I take it straight?
Home a couple other chest like this and we did not take these

(02:03:46):
chests. I don't remember if we tried to
take them. Sounds like you have someone who
is economical on your team at that point.
Does Ezra need to lift? Everything.
Then we left the chest. There, can I attempt to lift the
chest 20? 20 I think Faust is already

(02:04:08):
trying to lift up one side of itand drag it somewhere.
OK. Oh, it's real heavy, huh?
Oh, well, we're taking this to the pocket rocket then.
Where's the pocket rocket? Let's.
See, and my belt, you just poof in.
Just pit lift it up and poof in.We should really talk about what

(02:04:29):
we buy with all of our funds. 19Strength check to to lift it.
We could get an amulet that would plane shift us straight
out of here. Like we don't have to do
anything else 'cause I won't, won't wait.
Let's let's once we get into thepoker rocket, let's have a
little pow wow 'cause there's some like real dangerous shit

(02:04:52):
waiting for us on the other sideof of the other side of the
level 1 hell portal. Yeah, you should be Ezra Smash.
See, Ezra's so smart. Ezra found the door we have to
smash, and Ezra going to go to that door and he's going to
smash that door because Ezra is smart.

(02:05:17):
So yeah, everyone would poof into the pocket Rocket
excitedly, with Ezra holding oneside of the chest and Voust
holding the other side, I think.Oh wait, we're in the pocket,
rocket. We have our yes, we're in the
pocket rocket, we have the chest.

(02:05:38):
Now we need to come up with the item that we desperately want,
need to get out of here. We can forget Castle, which I'm
sort of disappointed in, but I am willing to do to get out of.
Hell. And just say goodbye to this.
I have the perfect trade. We sell lunch.
What? To who, Man?

(02:05:59):
Everyone's dead. We killed that like the only
city we ever found we killed. We have to get out first, no?
No, no, no lunch. We sell lunch.
Fuck is this. You sell.
Lunch. Not the child.
Nobody. Concerned.
No, that's the thing Franklin brought in as well.

(02:06:21):
Oh, the floating thing. Yeah, that.
Guy here. Guys, guys, would you just start
watching Franklin? What is this?
Wait, what are what are we looking at?
We tried to. Like that should have.
Oh well, that was. Floating squid thing.
Yeah, well, I originally got it for Bob, but Bob didn't want it.

(02:06:43):
Yeah, if anyone wants it. Like it's just chilling people,
leader. I'm surprised that Bob did not
want the fucking tentacle monster, all right?
Blind Purple. People here anyway.
Well guys, let's have a little powwow.
Let's have a little powwow a second.
Oh, there I am. OK.

(02:07:03):
I need a drink first. I can't powwow with you guys.
Where's the drink? I.
I Chuck a bunch of the I. I ask her why not as I'm
chucking like corpses from my backpack to the skeleton
monster. Ezra is currently looking for
lunch. Yeah, me and you both, buddy.

(02:07:27):
There should be a couple leftover goblins hanging for
you. You know, it's getting me like a
bag of bricks that like for likethis is like the the pocket
rocket to Franklin is like he's like a Harvest Moon PC and this
is his car. Yeah.

(02:07:49):
I honestly for this. Horrible little farm.
Oh wait, I think these are half GIF half goblin bodies over here
too. Yeah, I forgot about those.
Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember
those. Yeah, we Chuck.
We, we stole a bunch of them. When we brought them in, we were
stripping the bodies of their meat so that they could either

(02:08:10):
eat it or it could decompose forthe biosphere.
And then we were chucking the bones to feed the skeleton
monster. Yep.
Listen, we live in a enclosed environment here.
We, we have to keep up on this stuff, right?
Yeah. We need the.
Spring cleaning, Gus. It's like a frat house, but
instead of deep your cans and dirty clothes, it's bodies.

(02:08:35):
Body on monsters every. Time pouch came here.
He did spring cleaning. Has anyone here seen what we do
in the shadows? Yes.
So the TV show when Guillermo leaves and there's just like.
This is what happened when y'allleave.
Not the. Movie Franklin and Ezra
unattended. Well, like he's fair.

(02:08:57):
Like I'm trying to be fairly clean about this, but like we
have a system that we have to keep running and like it needs
fuel and you. See fuel from your last
planting. Just this budding sprouts inside
of the water, some lilies and such as well.

(02:09:19):
Yeah, that's right. I I give the seeds to one of my
guys and instruct him to 1st figure out what they are, that
they're not dangerous, and then spread them around.
I planted a mango tree in there,so maybe we'll get mangoes soon.
But anyway, we're digressing. Definitely start evaluating this
bitch. That's right, we need find lunch

(02:09:40):
all. Right, I need a drink.
We we go gather in the bar area,everyone gets drinks and snacks.
I have a little bit of information you guys don't have
yet, Ash. Maybe you do, but I've been

(02:10:01):
chatting with someone on the surface of Tariff and the the
level 1 portal rift or whatever they call it is currently under
assault by the good guys and it's an incredibly dangerous
situation. I'm very afraid that if we were

(02:10:24):
to go that way, we would a either be seen, captured,
killed, or cajoled into either joining some other evil group
or, you know, get stabbed to theback by the people that are
attacking the tower or the. Raises his hand.

(02:10:47):
I high 5 you. What's up, buddy?
What does kaju mean? Cajole.
It needs to to be coerced. It's probably too big to trick
to be tricked into doing something.
Yeah, the influence in a, in a, in a mean way, this box with all

(02:11:13):
of its money and all the money we have, we could wish for an
item that could just take us out.
Ezra holds out his hands to ash.And then like, we'll have to go
find a place to like lay low fora little while, figure out what

(02:11:33):
we're doing, get our headache out of the surface before, you
know, like obviously once we escape, like, I mean, I like you
guys, but like, you don't have to stay with us.
But like, I hope you do 'cause you're like my family.
You're. You're right.
Here sounds real logical but notcompatible with my barbarian

(02:11:56):
nature. I know we talked about this
before making this. Page.
And I'm like, hold on, hold on to that thought, Ezra, because
we we got to do a little bit more planning.
But we had talked about this before and we could reach out to
my family as a place for us to hide or lay low because we have

(02:12:18):
multiple properties. And we could probably reach like
a contact or an informant that is employed by my family who
maybe like. I can.
Ride. I can reach out to people across
from here and talk to them in their dreams.
I have been recently that's. Not.

(02:12:41):
But if I don't know them or knowof them, then I wouldn't be able
to reach out to them. I called like a taxi driver in
the city that we're going to be emptying out at if we can get
out. He was a little freaked out, not
sure if he's going to do what I asked him.
We'll see. But I'm just, I'm very worried

(02:13:04):
about like we're going to be a very, very, very vulnerable if
we managed to get out the regular way.
Like, I know you're barbarian and you want to smash things,
but like, we would be an incredible danger.
People trying to close the portal, what makes you think

(02:13:25):
they would attack us? They don't even know who we are.
Oh, they know. They are the sorts.
Of very meta question if. They are the sorts to be closing
a portal. If they are the sorts to be
closing a portal to tell, do youreally think they will allow
that? I pointed Franklin.
I wave through, yeah, I'm a goodguy.

(02:13:46):
It's just like I love a little scary.
Like I'm a nice guy, though. What's scary?
Turtle, you know. What?
I mean, we could. We could put you in the pocket
rocket when we go past. They don't.
Have to know and they they already know, right?
I look at Ash. All right, this is going to be a

(02:14:08):
little complicated. Yeah, it is for sure.
You and I are aware because we sat at that table and that like
really solidified our brains with the others.
So we, you and I, have been getting tons and tons of
information from these other people.
But Cat, I guess the chicken that is my alter ego still don't

(02:14:30):
understand how that works, is not as aware as I am.
Or is Cat aware 'cause I thoughtit was only Ash that had that
kind of like sink train activity.
I believe so, but I am really trying hard to remember October
slash beginning of November and it.

(02:14:51):
Was it was per character? OK, if it.
Was per character. Then Cat is not aware and
neither is my my character. So Ash is the only one that is
aware of the three of us. So Catch is going along Willy
nilly and then like Ash is just totally aware of his plans and
all the things that he's doing and that he's thinking about

(02:15:12):
becoming a dragon or AT Rex. I think we need to take a big
step back and look at our situation.
Look at everyone. We were all put here.
We agree on this. Like you, You showed up here
randomly, right? Like you just appeared.
Yeah, we were just dropped here.We were chosen by the deities of

(02:15:37):
this world in a sort of game. It's US versus this other team
to determine which one becomes God, as far as I understand it.
Yeah, that is the gist that. I I'm Ezra, I'm not God.

(02:15:58):
Break their game, break their wheel.
So yeah, what if we just teleport out of?
Here, fuck off. Where's the wheel?
Against this other team of individuals who include people
who a wheel but you don't want to move off someone 's watching

(02:16:18):
maybe a wheel. Wheel.
Do we need to go find their wheel?
Turning. We.
And then hanging out in Ash's house.
Tells me that the gods. Yeah, we get out of here, we go
lay low in one of my family's holdings, and we come up with a

(02:16:39):
plan of how to get ourselves back into power.
Because that was my original plan before I got sucked into
hell to run errands for an A Godwho's stuck in a hole or
something. Yeah, So Daniopoulos, you point
at the boxes. He's one of the guys that put us

(02:17:00):
here. He wants us to free him and he's
testing us and putting US against the other team.
That's why we put him in a little red box where we don't
talk to him anymore. If if he if he just wrong God
get locked in box he puny God. He's locked in the planet.

(02:17:22):
Wait, wait, wait, wait, I thought the torques.
Were locked in the box the. Torques.
No, they're just like a Yeah, the torques are a lead box so
that he can't hear us. OK.
But the God himself, the God that summoned us to do his
bidding, is trapped in, I guess,the core or the metaphysical

(02:17:43):
core of this planet. And if we free him, it will
destroy the planet. Yeah.
Someone else? Might I've been reaching out
correct? I have the wings because.
They're free. No, that's not the plan.
I don't want to do that. Yeah, Ash is not one.
Of the He's the God of deceit wants.
To rule the place, not destroy it.
Yeah. I know I'm looking.
Out of here and there needs to be here.
To get out. Ever find lunch?

(02:18:05):
Ever find lunch? In the pocket rocket,
absolutely. There were some goblins cooking
some BBQ the. Very specific goblin.
Did I find him? Oh no, he's gone.
I forget where where where he fucked off to, but yeah, he he.
Think we traded him to like the shopkeep or something like that

(02:18:26):
at some point. Yeah, Ezra grabs a random
goblin. No, we're protecting them.
We are protect. I point at all of the the
corpses that are being hung fromthe walls.
Like like sides of beef. There are literally dozens of

(02:18:46):
corpses. No, no, no, Ezra's not doing.
Ezra's not doing what you think he's doing.
Ezra walks up to the box, throwsthe goblin in the box, closes
the box and then goes. I wish I had a way to go to a
Mama Ash home now please. Are you trying to discover the

(02:19:09):
value of a way? Sacrifice A goblin soul.
Oh my God, you're a genius. I walk up to you.
Wait, No, no. We still can't sacrifice this
guy. We made a deal.
That we could offer. A.
Mama Mama is Mama Ashes home andhe wants to go there so he took.

(02:19:34):
Doesn't believe goblins are going to be worth that much to
begin with. I don't know either, but I guess
we're going to see what happens.Oh my God dude you're so fucking
smart. How much is a life worth?
It's a soul, so a soul is still a soul.
A goblin life is not worth much.A goblin soul is not worth much.
At least if you ask. Foul.
It's pretty racist dude. Yeah, I think that is pretty.

(02:19:58):
Racist. Box.
Damn. And org.
Yeah, I probably Faust is an org.
He has he has bad opinions. They know.
Right. OK, OK.
But. Let's see.
Let's see what the box thinks. I finally we can't, we can't
sacrifice this goblet. We promised him we would kill

(02:20:18):
him. Germany.
Too late, he's in the box. We.
Prevent him from closing the boxon him.
Finally found the image that waswhat I was trying to find, which
is that Frederick Dicks Ash withRegina on her lap.
That's what I was trying to remember.
If, if, if Ash had Cat on her lap or who 'cause I remember

(02:20:40):
you'd had someone on your lap. Oh yeah, no, it was Regina
because she was just like weaving my mom.
And since I already had Enyo andESOL in my other arm, I was like
yeah sure. And I just popped her up.
So I just had two kids on my lapsitting at this table.
With Frederick and Mime. Wait, so.
Your baby is also enlightened. Would they be?

(02:21:03):
Fuck yes. My daughter's enlightened.
Yeah, I mean, it would be kind of like one of the, especially
because you and you and Isel don't speak yet.
Be like one of those weird moments where they like
intuitively do things without you realizing.

(02:21:23):
Mother, they're just here doing like crazy magic work while
we're off adventuring. We see the future mother.
That's good, honey. Tell me what you see.
Mountains of fire. Anyways, die I.
Went to that soul worth world. The box closes or attempts to

(02:21:47):
close. The chest attempts to close on
the goblin instantly, and you can see that it's fingers and
toes at the very least as it's trying to like, scramble out of
the way of the box that's it's closing, get trapped in it.
And then it just automatically reopens with the goblin
screaming in pain, holding its fingers and toes close to itself

(02:22:08):
and trying to roll out-of-the-box.
Ezra grabs the goblin, punches it in the face and then throws
it back in the in the box. Grizzly.
Ezra is mad, he has no tail, he wants to go to this nice comfy
place called Ash home. He is doing this and he smashes
that goblin in the face and putsit back in the box and closes

(02:22:31):
the box. I I attempt to stop it, but I
would say Ash is finding this pretty humorous too.
She doesn't have. Wait, how?
How often just watching so like.Does Agonon know why the goblins

(02:22:52):
are even in the pocket rocket? Nope.
OK. They're contracted.
So how much is that soul worth, Josh?
Well, Ash, you're I see a customrole, but I'm not sure what that
exactly means it's going to be. I I I meant to roll for

(02:23:13):
advantage and disadvantage on trying to stop him but I just
ended up rolling 2 D 20s at the same time.
Rick, if we establish it and a monetary value for fucking
souls, it's going to be so much worse than the juicing wagon.
I'm so so you your first one. I would I would go with your

(02:23:36):
first role, their very first role.
Whichever does it show you, Ash.A six I rolled.
A six. I rolled in athletics to try and
stop him. From well, no, I see the, I see
the athletics. I was referring to your very
first DD 20 roles that you had rolled previously.

(02:23:59):
Oh, that was me trying to roll athletics, but I just clicked D
20s, yeah, 2 D 20s at the same time, and I got a 7 and was it a
16? Yeah, it was a 16 and A7
actually, chronologically speaking, because that's what I
was just I think I was hovering over and seeing at least that's
why I was asking. So you would take that 16 and

(02:24:21):
add your athletic exponents which is 2 of 18 for a contested
strength from Ezra. Oh, OK, you know.
I'm trying to branch out. Ezra wants to make this thing 20
from Ezra. This bitch is going in the box.
Get in the box. Because I just leaned in the.
Line, go ahead, I'm sorry. And he and, and, and he is

(02:24:47):
wishing that we had a way to go to Mama Ash's home right now.
If you want to describe it, go go right ahead.
I wasn't stopping you. I was just going to help so, but
you do not succeed Ash so. Yeah, I see him punch this
goblin and then, like, pick it up to throw back in the chest.
And I kind of like, stumble forward and try to, like, grab

(02:25:08):
the lid of the chest to keep himfrom closing it, but he just
slams it down and I grab on empty air and I'm like, oh,
shit. And then you hear.
And then you hear Box take me and friends to Mama Ash's home
now. I look around in anticipation.

(02:25:32):
Got. Wrecked by like stick.
Out no we. Oh God, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I pop out of the pocket rock andI grab the pocket rocket.
That what? Well, the like if we all.
Get home, man. I need to be outside of the
pocket rocket so I can have it so it comes with us.

(02:25:55):
Yeah, so if somebody's holding the pocket rocket, rocket.
Yeah, when we're all in here, what is happening on the
outside? Is it just like a bag sitting on
the ground? It's a rock.
It's just a rock. It's just a.
Rock I normally, I normally leave my familiar out there with

(02:26:16):
it, so it's like kind of watching, but.
As you poof out of the poker rocket to grab it, the chest
reopens and on the inside is just like a sticky note slammed
to the goblin's head with a question with a question mark.

(02:26:39):
Is the goblin. Alive.
The goblin is alive. What did you see?
Who put this on your head? Screaming in pain tell us.
Tell us what you. Ezra takes the tell.
Us about the other time. Ask Mama.

(02:27:00):
Ask for, for, for, for shinies. I, I, I hold my hand up that
round. I'm like, hold on, hold on.
I think we need to be more specific with what we want from
the chest before we do this. I think it gives us items, so we
need an item that will transportus there.
So we need to do maybe a little bit of research and
brainstorming, but there is foodhere and I just whipped some

(02:27:23):
beef jerky out of my pack right here.
Snack on this and we're going tobrainstorm.
Well, we did a first, we did a first degree as a team that
that's the plan we're we're going with.
Yeah, that's are we sludging through this level and through
level 1 or are we using quote Amulet of the Planes?

(02:27:47):
To escape. Mama is just going to belch and
be like, I vote violence, let's fight our way out.
But we can have violence. There's two.
Franklin is not there. Into.
The into the box close what in the box throws jewels, food and

(02:28:09):
goblin in the goblin. Your the goblin is taking up
space that valuable items could be taking up.
And then he puts it, puts it in there and he and he uses his
best, best intelligence. Are you doing that or are you
chasing jerky? Because I thought Ash was
throwing jerky. Yeah, I pulled.
Jerky, right? He rolled, he rolled for

(02:28:30):
intelligence. He, he is, he's single.
He is in single minded focus mode.
I rolled A1, He signified a mode, Single minded slams it
back in there and he thinks as hard as how Mama Ash said give
me an object that takes me to Mama Ash's home.

(02:28:51):
Kneeling next to this box like Oh my God, what is happening?
You you feel the box ready to open again.
You take your hands off. It opens not a single piece of
treasure has disappeared, nor the goblin who is still

(02:29:12):
screaming profusely at this point, but there is a map on top
of his chest that is a mimicry of the map that you guys have of
the of hell to get out of hell and I'm.

(02:29:32):
I pick up the map and I'm looking at it and I'm like, is
is this a sign that we can't wish for an object to get us out
of hell? I'm, or we need to be specific.
I'm going to roll Arcana to identify a known magic item that
could potentially get us out of here.
Ezra has the goblin ready to throw back in.

(02:29:53):
Guidance. You're not even there for as you
poof back in, you can. Yeah, well, we didn't.
We didn't like, we didn't leave,right?
Nothing happened. No, nothing happened.
You were just holding by. Yourself holding the pocket
rocket, looking around. So are you grabbing the pocket

(02:30:15):
rocket trying to poof into the pocket rocket?
No I my assumption was the the box would not have the same like
a rule like it wouldn't be proximity based.
Like if he included me in his request I would be taken with
it. So I was trying to just hold on

(02:30:36):
to it. As an object that would go with
you if we did a planer shift or some planer dimensional travel.
So you are just standing outsideof it holding it right now,
Yeah. Yeah, and I adjusted the nose.
And removed a bunch of the and blender.
Faust, I see. Narcana check.

(02:30:56):
What are you doing there? I was attempting to identify a
magic item that could potentially get us out of here
because Faust doesn't know. I don't know for sure that Faust
knows what a magic, what could do it.
He's a wizard, but you know, spells that could do it that he
doesn't know. But.

(02:31:17):
Yeah, I was going to say, would Ash know of any item that could
teleport us? I bet.
Not he would know to look for hewould he he would know to at
least look for a scroll. Yeah, I was.
If you don't know the spell, youdon't need to know the spell if
the scroll. Which is.
A knob. Can be the spell.
Yeah. You just need that something to
give you plane shift. Oh wait, that's the that's the

(02:31:41):
spell that we need. Yeah, it's a.
Seven level spell. I don't know it though.
Like, I like the thing we need, I know what we need, but like,
if you're RP ING, I get it. The spells.
With your Arcana check of 11. We need plane shift and or the

(02:32:09):
amulet of the planes and or a spell scroll with plane shift on
it. Your best guess with your
understanding of the magics on this and previous realms now
that you've been in. If they are sealed there isn't

(02:32:33):
any way. OK, so you gave them?
Plane shift out of hell? Interesting.
OK, so we have to unseal the levels of hell to get out of
them, and that's how we've made our way through the levels of
hell thus far. How do we break the seal?
You've broken yourself already. How do you do it?
Either defeating, well no I was going to say either defeating a

(02:32:58):
creature but no. And one we got 3 witches to
unlock a giant door for us. They still live in our house.
Oh, that reminds me. Ezra with all intelligence, Mama
Ash, I know what we must do. We must find the door that needs
the penis key and smash it. I'm going to look for an ad

(02:33:19):
request, an item that will allowus.
What did we find? Anything that would let us
through here, like through this level.
Ezra's right, we need to get to that.
Or the penis key. We need to get to Clitoris
Castle. Cause Mama Ash says clitoris is
the most important thing to find.

(02:33:42):
Are you've? Got a queen to will?
Are are you trying to ask the chest that or yes, confused?
No, I thought trying to ask the chest that I just stated that
out loud. We need to get to Clitoris
Castle 'cause I think unlocking this plane is the queen of
Clitoris Castle needs appeasing.I said that with air quotes.

(02:34:09):
Ezra did not. He totally took it as I'm
throwing his goblin back in and asking that question.
So even if we found a portal, are you saying that they're all
locked even if we found a portal?
Sounds what it sounds like. Yeah, because we also unlocked

(02:34:31):
what was the other one where we were in the tunnels that jizzed
gold and we had to break that mirror in order to get out of
that level of house. And that caused Flint and
Hamilton to switch bodies. Yeah.
Yeah, there's, it kind of varieson how you get through.

(02:34:52):
But if we've now confirmed that we can't teleport out, then Ezra
will take the foods. Front of it all, Ezra will smash
the Queen's door. I think that's a door that maybe
Bob and I are going to need to smash.

(02:35:13):
You are not as big as Ezra. We're going to have a problem.
I'm going to walk up to the chest, take it like, put my
hands on it and think of a helm of teleportation.
With the goblins still inside. There there are.
Also, as you've seen the chest open several times at this

(02:35:36):
point, still many bars of platinum and gold inside I'm.
Aware. Now I need to look that up.
Helm of Teleportation, you say? Yes, is from the 20/20/14 The
free Rule, page 174. When we have CON, how many items

(02:35:57):
does it give us change? Like does it only take the value
of what we wished for or does ittake the overflow of what's in
the chest? No, it only takes the value of
what the item was. OK I'm so worried.
I'm so curious how much a soul'sworth.
I keep charging that card. Maybe goblin souls are worth a
lot. I mean, I've, I've, I've, I've

(02:36:18):
swiped that ass a few times already.
That sticky note was expensive. So is Franklin just outside?
Still outside. He hasn't come back and he's
just standing there holding the.Rock.
He's got to be. I mean, he's waiting.
I guess I'll eventually pop backin.

(02:36:40):
I guess it didn't work. Or you're you're waiting to be
outside of hell. Next.
To the box our door. No item will get us.
No item will get us out of hell with the seals in place.
We have to get rid of the seals.And to do that, I will smash the
door. So seen Ezra's distress.

(02:37:02):
Agonon walks up to the the chestand wishes for the a scroll of
the spell that regenerates body parts.
I'm still in the helm. I'm sorry.
OK, that's. OK, let's give him a minute.
We've caused a lot of chaos. Let the DM take a breath.
Shopping charge teleport rare item is kind of crazy.

(02:37:26):
Yeah, I'm, I'm. I was trying to find back to my
notes because I know I'd made some about cost of items.
Nope. Not there.
Oh, not last day I'll. Be right back.

(02:37:52):
It was a very chaotic note. What was that?
Bunch of numbers. Numbers which usually at these
hours I am incapable of calculating, but we'll say for
the sake of argument there as you open the chest, there is a

(02:38:20):
helm there, but there are less bars of gold and platinum for
it. You guys haven't yet to
calculate how many there are, sothere seems to be a sizable hole
where this one was. Is the goblin still there?
The. Goblin is still there, and with
Ezra also having touched the chest with their desire at that

(02:38:41):
point in time, there now is a sticky note on it that is
pointing at Faust with an arrow.Finally found it.
How do I find the Queen's door to smash?
I can do that. I'm going to take the helmet,
put it on my head, meet me outside the pocket rocket, OK?

(02:39:08):
And I'm going to leave. Everyone or just.
All of y'all that's one of y'allwants to carry the pocket
rocket. I normally do that's.
Cool. Ezra's follow Ezra's following

(02:39:30):
thoughts. He said he could take him to the
Queen's door. To smash, I mean.
I can. With.
Once we're within a mile of the portal, I can find it.

(02:39:51):
OK, time. We got to pick a property.
May I see that painting, Ezra? He handed you the painting.
And again, this is a picture of a chastity belt with like what

(02:40:13):
what all was in the painting. Set of legs with a chastity belt
that has a very penis shaped hole that has teeth around it.
OK, OK, How do we know what the castle looks like?

(02:40:36):
How do we know? Why are we calling it Castle
Clitoris? Mama.
Actually it's called classic clitoris.
Well, what a way to end the session.
Franklin, holding the pocket rocket, teleports within what

(02:41:05):
looks like a day's March from Clit Castle.
You don't know exactly that. Franklin Castle.
This new teleport already, God damn it.
No I no, no, no, no no no. You.
You teleported up to 8 willing creatures.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't.
I don't know who. Oh, you rolled the percentile?

(02:41:28):
OK, bet. And.
Franklin. So I was confused.
I understand the but from perspective matters.
You guys inside of the pocket rocket don't notice any change
at first. Didn't he leave the pocket
rocket? I didn't think so.

(02:41:49):
I missed that if you did. Said, 'cause he said follow me
outside. Yeah.
I don't know how teleporting inside the pocket rocket works.
I see, I see. So yeah, as you tell, As you
poof. Outside of the pocket rocket.
So now I'm now I'm just utterly confused.

(02:42:09):
Are you trying to teleport everyone as they are teleporting
outside of the pocket rocket or are you teleporting?
Once they're out, we're all going to teleport or they can
ride in the pocket rocket. It's wherever they want to ride.
But we're. Going.
We're going for a teleport ride.Yeah, OK.
Most important thing is whoever's holding the pocket
rocket is teleporting. Yes.

(02:42:32):
OK, now, yeah. So either which way then whoever
is viewing it, that's what you see is that Franklin and the
rest of the crew that are outside of the pocket rocket You
are standing now within an easy days March of what appears to be

(02:42:55):
a castle that protrudes predominantly from a Cliff face.
Didn't have to give that guy that thing.
Faust, you are so smart. There it is.
Let us go and smash that door. We.

(02:43:20):
For a brute, we really do need to have a conversation about the
birds and the bees. You could buy, oh, you could
wish for a a helmet of intellectfor Ezra.
Ezra's not dumb. I know what a bee and a bird is.
How do you make young pups, Ezra?

(02:43:42):
Ezra don't have any pups I have.But how do you do it?
If you were to make pups, how was the deed done?
Well, when a dad wolf and a mom wolf, they love each other.
They go into The Cave and then with a while later Mama have

(02:44:05):
puppies. What does a mommy wolf and the
daddy wolf do in The Cave, Ezra?Mommy and daddy's stuff, of
course. Are you not old enough to know
what mommy and daddy's stuff is,Ezra?
Wait, how old I am? He's counting in.

(02:44:28):
Fingers with this many. Ezra Hold.
On his fingers. And then he, and then, and then
he held up his hands and toes. I am that many moons.
Moons. Moons.
Oh shit. The.

(02:44:49):
Baby, you're like a kid. No moons to him means years.
Moons are years to him. Their moms.
Years or people years. Oh my.
And on and on this planet there is a new moon bi weekly 'cause

(02:45:10):
there are two moons. So he is definitely very, very
young. Ezra just jacked his shit.
He's like the world's strongest 4 year old.
I see. Oh, let's see if Ezra does that
in wolf years 2020. Toes and fingers he is.

(02:45:41):
House begins walking towards thecastle, muttering.
Foust begins walking towards thecastle, muttering about how he
was dragged to hell to babysit. Fouls, fouls come back.
You must tell me what Mama and Papa's do in The Cave.
Wait, so did. We get a.
Helmet of teleportation And are we like standing at the castle

(02:46:04):
now? Yeah, we are a day's walk from
the castle. Oh, here I can give you a
visual. Actually, I forgot I could do
that. You guys were still on the
pocket rocket. Second one.
Here we go, visual on the castle.
Oh. Hello.

(02:46:31):
We can make this this walk. Yeah.
Everybody stay hydrated. You know, drink water.
Oh well, that's unfortunate. Not going to be a little.
That's a Fallon Castle. I don't see the picture.
Where's the picture? Hey.
It's taken, it's on a roll 20 Oh, rolling discord too.

(02:46:55):
Yeah. Is Bob still in Ezra form?
Bob is Bob is probably still in Ezra form.
He he may have he may have started to feel bad for the

(02:47:17):
goblin at one point and turned into the goblin.
So now there's a goblin walking next to us instead of a second
Ezra and I would I would be aware of this, that this is Bob.
And I'm like, hey, would you mind turning into a noble steed
so that we can ride our way to the castle?

(02:47:39):
Certainly, Mistress. I would like.
Turns into a cable, yeah. I would like to note that I have
explained that a significant amount of my magical energies
and would like a break. Sorry, we could take it out.
Y'all walk. I will be in the pocket rocket

(02:48:00):
however. You come back, you must explain
what happens in The Cave. It might help with.
Me and Bob could be outside the Pocket Rocket, just trudging
through the desert, and everybody else could be inside,
unless they wanted to stay out here with us.

(02:48:21):
But yeah, I have exactly 4 spellslots left and I would like to
No. I have sticks I can get by but
that won't last long. If this is a boss fight, that
will not last long, but. Agonize going to go back in the
pocket Rockets try to get that scroll for Ezra.
Ezra going to ask this fast is not going to answer question.

(02:48:44):
Bob, do you know what Mama wolves and Papa wolves do in The
Cave? I don't know if I'm supposed to
tell you a little one, but I mean big one, big, big, big one.
They do the Giggity Giggity. If if Ezra follows, spouse will
give him the most like clinical explanation of effect ever.

(02:49:10):
Just. Straight out of a textbook, this
is what happens. Exactly.
The. Penis enters the vagina.
Traumatic health class birthing video included.
I said no matter what, you've never beaten me.
All right, so this is all happening while it's just me and

(02:49:32):
Bob trudge into the desert. Everybody else is getting a sex
course. It's like pocket rocket.
Well, me and Bob are already well educated in that field.
So we're 5. Miss it?
During my downtime in the PocketRocket, I'm going to store 16
points of spell slots into my book or into into glass piles

(02:49:54):
and stuff. Since that's how we decided we
could flavor it, we would flavorit.
Yeah, make sure to make note of that.
Are we short resting or long resting?
Well, I'm going to attempt to take a long rest.
Yeah, a a a day's walk for thosethat aren't aren't walking.
Otherwise, if you guys are deciding to switch off those,

(02:50:14):
those that need to switch off anyhow would be getting short
rest. Ezra.
Soul Coin Ezra decides to bouncebetween learning what Faust
tells him and what Bob tells him.
What What does Bob tell Ezra? What does Bob tell Ezra?

(02:50:39):
Giggity. Oh yeah, yeah, there's, there's
a lot of, there's a lot of giggity and a lot of goo.
I got to hop off. Have a good night all.
Good. Night.
Night. So I feel like Bob would give it
to you in the most rotten but flowery language, like the

(02:51:01):
muttiest of smut books is how hewould describe it to you.
That's probably true. Yeah.
Because of like robbing member entering the.
Unforsaken dungeoness Ezra. Ezra says certain things.
He contemplates. He sits there, contemplates.
So the door that Ezra must smashis the Queen's door.

(02:51:28):
With your throbbing member, of course.
Ezra can do that. Ezra will smash the queen.
Now you're getting funny. Yeah, you you are a step closer,
but the the only other part. I'm pretty sure the Queen needs
to enjoy the smashing. Bob How does Bob?

(02:51:59):
How do I make the Queen enjoy smashing?
Oh. If you know the quarter turns
tepstern and then rotate, you got it all day.
You will teach Ezra this move sohe may perform the smash.
Oh wait, wait, I got one better room over there.

(02:52:21):
Do you know how to tell the alphabet with your tongue?
What is alphabet? We've got a long lesson ahead of
us. I'm just imagining Ash sitting
on top of the camel and the camel was just reciting this
while like Ezra is as close to this camel's head as he can get

(02:52:45):
talking to about it and Bob is just loving it.
He, he fucking loves this. Oh yeah.
We're corrupting and innocent. I'm fucking like.
Farts, but he. Didn't it just occurred to me
that because I'm attuned to thisbook, I technically have to have
a long Snow White beard? Yep, House appearance has
changed, damn it. Like abruptly.

(02:53:09):
It's an abrupt change. Oh, this is once you tuned to
the handbook. You grow a long snow.
This is the magical book I got off of.
The table. The table, yeah.
So this would have been like day2 of meeting Faust.
He would have had that. It's length is 1D6 plus my

(02:53:32):
wizard level. OK, how long is this fucking
beard? All right?
I don't think. You're.
Probably going to have 10. It is a an inch long beard.
That's not that's not bad. Like, no, that's very majestic.
Football, that's like mid chest,yeah.
Yeah, and I got a little heart when I get there, I think my

(02:54:00):
beard we're. Both a good ways off from that.
Right. My beard's like, maybe.
We we our beards are too damn curly to really get that long.
I've gotten it that long before I've gotten mine to about like
the top, like, you know, the middle of my chest before it
just, it just, it just takes, you know, me like putting my, my

(02:54:21):
beard and braid and it, you know, making it that way.
Yeah. Let's see here.
Ezra is being educated by Bob. The camel.
Bob the Camel. Bob the Camel is teaching Ezra

(02:54:44):
the alphabet so that he may slaythe Queen's door.
Equipped with the glorious humps.
I'll praise the glorious humps Hump day.

(02:55:06):
Zebra Ezra's learning all about it.
Agonon is long resting, pondering the fact that the
level of lust is suspiciously dry.
That's. Why?
We've got to make it to the Queen.
She needs a peasing. And Ezra Will Bob.

(02:55:26):
Is not educating Ezra about the giggity.
You, Ash and him are going to talk about this level of hell,
why it may be dry, and what theythink they need to do when they
find a queen because they are discussing tag teaming this.

(02:55:47):
Oh, in the. Sense that I wish.
Oh yeah, Bob. Bob would have probably at least
supplied the idea that we picked.
Him up on Friday. From the histories that he knows
that the Queen had taken over this level after defeating all

(02:56:07):
of the foes that had also ruled it with her.
As you know from Faust's rendition of legend lore as
well. But after that, everything had
dried up and had more friends and her her prospects had

(02:56:27):
dwindled because of such. And then she kind of reclused
and. Just wished for a magic dildo
for the queen. And yeah, secluded herself in
her castle. But she's locked herself away in

(02:56:48):
her castle, so like, she's not trapped there, she's just
choosing to be there. Right.
OK. Ezra is is is learning this?
Bob, what is tag Team? Oh buddy, have you not learned

(02:57:09):
of the majesty of the Eiffel Tower yet?
I do not know this tower, but I will destroy it if we need to.
Oh, it's has nothing to do with destroying.
You got to be careful with this one.
And he goes on to describe and he goes on to describe the the

(02:57:32):
DP situation of being 2 males oneither side of a woman.
And striking A majestic pose while in the midst of koinas.
Yep. Bob, will you help me?
Strike the post, I'll do my bestbuddy.

(02:57:59):
So Ezra, go down this legend. Ezra is learning all of this and
he we have established that he is younger than we thought.
Yeah. And I'm so worried that we're
doing something horrible. Is this legal?
Funny, but yeah, legal is this. Legal.
Legal. No, he is.
He is legal age. No, Ezra is definitely legal
age. OK.

(02:58:23):
We've never been to. The same game we're going is not
on par. This is the same game that's
recommending bestiality for Grand Am, so, you know, like
we've never been here. Or we've never been concerned
with legality before, but like we we do have a limit.
OK maybe not legality but at onepoint when Bob was a troll he

(02:58:45):
was trying to have sex with anyone and everyone and I told
him you're only allowed to have sex with people that consent to
have sex with you and he was like OK.
And then literally at every single person in the party if
they would have sex with. Him.
He's. Ask understood.
He's, he's, I mean, he's a, likeI've described before, he was

(02:59:09):
he, he's a, he was a living creature before, but he's been
imprisoned inside of a skull, more or less.
Yeah, and. Like his own skull with.
No real sensory exactly. So he even though is really
smart, is just craving it. He is craving everything.

(02:59:30):
Taste, touch, sound. Maybe not sound he could hear.
Yeah, smell OK. Ready for bed?
I'll see you next time. Let's see.
Good night. Good.
Night. Feel like this a a great topping
point though too. Yeah, I feel like it is 'cause
it is like, what is it, 20 till 11?

(02:59:54):
Yeah, I'm about to say it's 930 romance.
It's. Been a long sex Ed lesson.
Oh yeah, that's that is definitely what the name of the
podcast is or episode is going to be Sex Ed.
Sex. Ed Ezra learns about the birds
and the bees. About the giggity goo.

(03:00:17):
Yeah, Ezra's learning so much. By the time he gets to the
Queen, he will be a scholar likeBob.
Yeah, I mean, like, if he does converse with Gob, with Gob,
with Bob almost the entire time,he's going to learn a lot.

(03:00:38):
And I am worried he's either going to be so pumped and ready
to go or so overwhelmed like. Did you guys do you?
Guys, remember that American Dadepisode where Stan was really
afraid to have the talk with Steve so he made like this TV
channel about not having sex? And then at the very end when

(03:01:00):
Francine convinces him she's like, you just need to talk to
your son. He went into so much depth that
Steve was just speechless and inlike shocked.
That's that seems appropriate. Ezra is so focused right now,
he's like I must smash the door in order to take Ash and

(03:01:24):
everyone to Ash's house. And we have a key that looks
like a Dick or a key that has teeth that are a Dick.
And then we have a painting of achastity belt that the queen is
wearing. OK.

(03:01:44):
Just just double checking. Oh, and you got your item before
Agonon. You were looking for an item
though too. I forget you said you put your
hand on the chest. Yeah, Agonon heard.
Who was it? I think it was Franklin or Grand

(03:02:11):
Am, I don't quite remember. He heard someone mentioned that
a spell existed that could regrow body parts, so he wished
for a scroll of that spell. I would say that the amount of
platinum and gold is now probably at least half or less,

(03:02:36):
but that scroll would appear as well before you left the pocket
rocket. But.
Well, he when he went back into long rest, he retrieved it.
Got. It but I will not present it to
Ezra until we are all back. Next time, OK.

(03:02:57):
Yeah, since that. Time on Dragon Ball Z.
Yeah, Ezra and Bob performed theEiffel Tower.
Yes. Will they succeed or will they
be tuned? And what's the name of that
spell? I can't remember.

(03:03:20):
I believe it's regenerate. OK.
All right, guys, I'm hopping offhere.
Have a good night. Right.
Yeah. Night.
I'm gonna do the same. I need to do get some more

(03:03:41):
school work done. Not everybody.
Night, Rick. Yeah, so I had to.
A grand and wonderful thank you for those who took the time and
made it here to the end of the episode where I know sometimes

(03:04:03):
we are long winded and others weare just dead silent.
I don't know what to tell you. This is raw here folks.
Please remember to like and subscribe and you can help
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(03:04:25):
following the support link there.
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(03:04:45):
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