Election Blues, Botox Boosts & Quincy’s Brilliance

In this episode, we dive into: why Halloween has become the ultimate extended celebration for midlifers, election reality bites (yes, even missing Dubya), a heartfelt tribute to the legendary Quincy Jones, and breaking the stigma around men embracing Botox and the occasional Viagra boost. It’s a mix of reflection, laughs, and real talk about midlife moments!

Thanks for listening--keep on marauding!

Episode Transcript

Unknown (00:00):
Nine.

(00:06):
Welcome to Midlife Marauderswith Will and Max.
Max question for you, when didHalloween get taken over by
midlife people, middle agedpeople.
Is that your perspective, or youthink you've actually seen it

(00:29):
more like I think it's, I thinkit's both firsthand, definitely
firsthand, and then, you know,I'm, I'm becoming aware of this
fact that, you know, when I wasgrowing up,
Halloween was just for the kids.
You know, we used to go outtrick or treating. I don't ever
remember my parents wearingcostumes. Did your parents
definitely were not celebratingor not like dressing up, right?

(00:50):
So it was just, you know, kids,you go around to the houses in
your neighborhood, none of timeshave changed. You know, people,
the world has changed. Peoplegot a little crazier and doing
weird stuff now, you know. Andyou know, I remember, you know,
well, after my childhood, youknow, parents would take their
kids to the mall or, you know,somewhere smaller they, you

(01:14):
know, they can kind of controlthe environment. But the reason
why I'm asking you aboutHalloween is because this past
Halloween, I swear I celebratedHalloween at least for a week
and a half. And that's justcrazy. And I'm like, when did
Halloween become this long,drawn out party? And it was, was

(01:34):
that because you wanted tocelebrate, or other people
trying to dragged you into it.
Well, I wouldn't say drag, but,you know, there were definitely,
like invitations tohouse parties. There was, you
know, kind of a couple of localestablishments were doing some
some stuff. And it was,you know, it was always, not

(01:56):
always, I shouldn't say that,but it was more or less, you
know, because when Halloweenfalls during the middle of the
week, I guess that's still forthe kids to go out and go trick
or treating. Yeah, they stillgo, yeah. But you know, for the
adults, they want to celebrateHalloween on the weekend. So for
me, it was, it was a long, drawnout process, because

(02:24):
my friend holds an annualHalloween bar crawl, and it's
just a small event. It's maybelike 20 people that do it, but
we go out in a kind ofa place where they have a lot of
bars and restaurants near me,and it's a weekend before,
that's the Thursday before,weekday before,

(02:49):
that's when everything starts.
Yeah, yeah. So I did that thatwas cool, dressed up as Chester
Cheetah from theCheetos brand, please show me a
photo. Yeah, I'll have to showyou a photo, but it just
something. I ran out to spiritHalloween about a quick costume,

(03:10):
but everybody else was wasdressed,
you know, great costumes, andthey like my costume, even
though I just bought it, youknow, a day before. But, you
know, there was people therewith all kinds of Marvel
outfits, and there was kind ofan Egyptian queen and king

(03:32):
there. There was a whole bunchof stuff, but it's just your
group, right? It was just mygroup. Just my group. So, you
know, we kind of stand out,because we're doing it a week
before Halloween. And, you know,people always say, Oh, that's so
cool that you guys do that.
Blah, blah, blah, I want to beinvited next year, so on and so
forth. So again, that was theweek prior to Halloween. So we
parted and did our thing, andthen coming. Then there were

(03:57):
since Halloween was on thefollowing Thursday, the the bars
and restaurants want tocelebrate Halloween on the
weekend. So there was a therewere a couple parties on that
Saturday before Halloween. Okay?
And same people in your some ofthe same, different, you know, I

(04:20):
reuse my Halloween outfit forthat. Hey, it is what it is. I'm
not buying a bunchperiod. So, yeah, so that was
cool. And then the actualholiday of Halloween came up the
following Thursday, and youknow, I went to a buddy's house.
He was having people over, andyou know, there were a few kids

(04:40):
there, but again, it was just abunch of middle aged people in
costumes and drinking and eatingand so on and so forth. And then
the people of kids, what aretheir kids doing? They were just
kind of like running around theneighborhood, you know? He Okay,
so they were trick or treating.
They were trick or treating. Hehas set up a a.
On fire out in front. Soit was cool. And then there was

(05:03):
another celebration that nightat an establishment I go to. So
I actually went to about four orfive Halloween events over that
week. And it was always withpeople that were not always but
it was with people that were ofmy age or still in their midlife

(05:24):
years, and I'm just like, whendid we take over this holiday of
Halloween? And it was just aproblem, right? Are you
complaining? Are youlike, I'm complaining, doesn't
it?
Was it just a realization, it'sjust too much. It's just
nobody's forcing you to do thesethings. No, I know, but it's

(05:46):
just like, you know, people getdisappointed when you can't show
I need to be able to let peopledown a little. Yeah, learn how
to say no. 100% but I'm like,after Halloween was over,
I was like, Man, I am exhaustedfrom Halloween. I just never had
that feeling before. And I waswondering, Am I the only one? Is
just my circle of friends thathave this, this ordeal they have

(06:10):
to go through. Are youexperiencing it? What's going on
here? So I'm not, because Iwent, actually, I went with my
kids trick or treating. Kind ofheld their bags sometimes when
it was raining here, of course,and then so I was holding the
umbrella and kind of, and thenmy older one kind of left early,
so I was with my younger one. Sotrick or shooting is still

(06:31):
happening, but,but I guess my question is, you
know, we kind of say on thispodcast, just say yes, right?
Like, say yes to everything, youknow, because there's a
tendency, I think, of midlifers, to not make the effort
to do things. So are you sayingsometimes you should say no.
I'm saying say yes, but in youknow, in moderation, you can't

(06:52):
do everything all the time, butno, it was fun. I shouldn't say
it like that. I did have a goodtime at every event. I just
thought it was very peculiarthat Halloween pretty much
lasted for seven to eight days.
And I just thought it washilarious to me. And I'm
wondering if people are goingthrough this same experience and
are noticing that adults,particularly middle aged couples
with kids, are celebrating ashard or harder than their actual

(07:18):
kids are. So I think dosomething fun. Well, I was only
one of my family to buy a newcostume, so everybody else
either use something old or likescrambling at the last minute.
So I do think there's a senseof, you know, we want to have
fun, and that's cool, great, youknow, and kind of be silly a
little bit. Yeah, no. And Ithink that's cool. It was just

(07:41):
seemed to be a very long, drawnout affair that just made me a
little tired, that's all. Butit's cool. Hey, celebrate
Halloween. I can't wait toHalloween falls back on the
weekend, so we just yeah, maybeit was because of the way it was
laid out. Yeah. Yeah. So it'scool. It's cool. Do your thing
on Halloween. Dress up. Yeah. Iknow. I know. I know. I know.

(08:06):
Speaking of bitching, man, Imean, we would be remiss not to
talk about the election. It'spolitics. There last time. Pat,
you know, what are yourthoughts? What are your
thoughts? Let's just start withyou. Well, you know, they talk
about you're in the however manystages of grief,

(08:29):
and I feel like I'm still in thedenial stage of grief.
I think it was, it was shocking.
It was, for me, it was shocking,it was sad. I mean, I feel like
a lot of people who voted forHarris feel, I think, you know,
very disappointed. I don't agreewith all these people who are
trying to point fingers andsaying, Oh, she should have done
this, or she shouldn't have run,or anything like that. I think
she gave it her best effort. I'msad, because I feel like Trump

(08:52):
represents, you know, all of thethings I don't want my kids to
look up to. You know, all thevalues we teach our kids. So
It's so disappointing to me, youknow. So what are your thoughts?
For me, it's like, I think that,you know, he did a whoever his
team is, as far as getting themessage out to the people or

(09:18):
just or his political platformis so simplistic that it kind of
caters to the base populace.
What I mean by that is, Iremember going to the voting
booth and seeing signs forHarris and seeing signs for

(09:39):
Trump. And, you know, the Harrissigns were just basic Harris,
you know signs, but the Trumpsigns were like, Trump, lower
lower taxes, Harris, highertaxes. You know what? I mean. It
was just so like, very simple,very similar messaging, very

(09:59):
clear.
Messaging and you know, and I,you know, and I, you know, I
can, a well reasoned mind, canread above that, but just just
on that visceral surface level,like, that's, that's, that's
what that's catering to thepeople. Like, it's just so
simple, I'm going to lowertaxes, she's going to raise

(10:20):
taxes. I'm,you know, getting rid of, rid of
illegal immigrants. She'sletting them in. It's just like,
you know, like, they can't bethat simple, obviously. And I
was like, Man, that's just,that's just some brilliant
marketing. And I'm not surprisedby the results. I really not I,
you know, my mom told me theother day that she saw somewhere

(10:42):
where, like 20 millionregistered Democrats
didn't vote for for Harris, ordidn't vote at all. I should
say, yeah, just vote at all. AndI'm like, I don't know why. Now
we couldn't explain a goodreason for that. I think she did

(11:03):
a reasonable job in the timethat she had, you know,
obviously, you know, hercampaign was, you know, I
wouldn't say rush, but it wasshortened by all extensive
intensive purposes. Again, I'mnot surprised, you know, I'm not
again. I'm not a big politicalyou know, if people want to vote
Republican, they voteRepublican. People want to vote

(11:25):
Democrat. They want they voteDemocrat or Independent. I'm
just looking at the character ofpeople that are running, and to
me, it seemed clear that onecharacter was a little bit
better a person than the other.
And I guess character doesn'tmatter anymore. No, you know,
it's not as big a factor. No,it's not, it's not just what you
know, I think people are justlooking at what this President

(11:49):
can do for them, as opposed tothe the majority. They're
looking at it from an individualstandpoint, and the fact that
they trust that he'll do stufffor them is kind of, yeah, yeah.
Again, this isn't a podcast of,you know, we're trying to sway
political opinion on it. We haveour viewpoints and our beliefs,

(12:10):
butit doesn't surprise me at all.
And you know, all we can do fromthis point on is just,
you know, as my mom said, justpray and and then, you know,
hopefully God will see usthrough this. And you know,
these, these people, aren'tdeities. They're not gods.

(12:33):
They're they're humans, justlike we are. And you know, we,
we had four years of Trumpbefore, and we, we got through
it, and hopefully we'll be ableto get through four years of
this one. So I'm just, I dothink it, I don't know, for some
people, hopefully it wasmotivating, like we gotta, we
can't just sit by and let thingshappen. Because I feel like that
was one thing that I realized,because one of my teenage kids,

(12:58):
you know, who he can't voteright now, he said something
like, oh, you know, I don't likeeither of the candidates, you
know. And that's what you hearright from some people. The
reason for not engaging or notvoting is because they don't
like either of them. So I and Ithought, wow, you know, my kid
is very easily influenced orinfluenced. I shouldn't say, you
know, I should respect hisopinion. But you know the fact

(13:20):
that you just sit out and you'reapathetic, I think that's not a
great thing, and I feel likesome people in our generation,
including me, are fairlyapathetic and not motivated, you
know, with a Slack, slackergeneration. So it made me think,
Oh, if I want change, I need tostep it up. You know, not just
think about like doing the bareminimum, like I gave a little
bit of money to the campaign orsomething. I need to, you know,

(13:41):
be a little bit more involved,or more involved, you know, or
figure out how I can bestcontribute to make change that I
believe in. So I thought thatwas kind of a lesson from the
event, you know, from the campelections, that I can't just sit
around and expect things tochange and hope other people
will carry things, you know. SoI really respect Harris for

(14:02):
doing her best. And I think whatwas disappointing, I think the
polls were showing that was soclose, and in the end, it wasn't
so I think we were all kind ofthinking it would be closer than
it was. Was Right, right? Youknow, I'm weighing in on your
apathy there. I think it said anall time high. I remember
as a as a lad, I remember I usedto, I used to be excited about

(14:25):
elections. You know, it was, oh,really, yeah, you know, which
elections were you excited aboutObama?
I was excited about Clinton.
I was excited. I had a realityabout Clinton.

(14:47):
Just curious. It was just he, heseemed like a decent person. He
seemed, well, you know, heseemed, just seemed like a good
man, and, um.
Um, just, just, just decency,yeah, I think that was most of
the yes of the presidency, yeah,just he, you know, back then the

(15:10):
people that ran for president,look, you know, were people that
you, at least to me, were peoplethat you kind of looked up to on
both sides.
No, for sure. Like, I alwaysthink, like, people say, right,
bring back, bring bring back. W.
I mean, he's just yeah, a goodold Yeah. I mean, we look back

(15:32):
at W, and, you know, I wasn't abig W fan, but looking back at
it now, man, Iyou know what I mean, he, you
know, he wasn't the greatestpresident, but at least he
seemed like a good person, youknow, yeah, he was more
relatable, for sure, 100% andthen when, you know, when he had
to, you know, transfer power. Hedid it with such grace and such

(15:57):
elegance. You know, it was, itwas a peaceful transfer of of
that position, and that's justsomething that we are sorely
missing right now. And, youknow, like I said, it's just
feeding into to apathy, youknow, you know, I voted,
but I wasn't excited to vote.
You know what? I mean, there wasno drive for me. Like, I'll be
honest. Excited this. I wasexcited. I'll be honest with

(16:21):
you. You want to know the realreason why I voted,
why I didn't want to disappointmy mother.
I knew she was going to call andask, Did you vote? Did you vote?
And I just did not want to,like, disappoint her, and I
couldn't tell her no. So Ivoted, and so was your mom super

(16:42):
disappointed and sad? Like, No,she wasn't super, you know, she
wasn't super disappointed.
She's realistic. She thoughtKamala had a reasonable chance,
but she she could foresee that,you know, she could probably
lose the election. And my momis, is a very

(17:04):
God fearing woman. So she shebelieves that God will take care
of us no matter whatthe bad people.
Yeah, that's what I'm hoping toYeah, 100% so it is what it is.
You know, the election has comeand gone, and we have to deal
with it, and all we can do is,you know, I don't know if we

(17:28):
should put our faith in thispresident, but just hope that it
turns out okay. I mean, look,look, the majority has spoken,
right, right? You know, theypeople want, wanted him, wanting
one of him wanted Trump to beour president. So, all right,
they felt he was the bestoption. Yeah, democracy in
action. So here we are with it,and let's see where where the

(17:50):
chips fall. God bless us all.
Well news before the electionswas Quincy Jones passed away.
So, yeah, let's talk about hisimpact.
Was a genius, yeah, he hetouched, at least musically. He

(18:15):
touched a lot of people. Had alot of influence in music.
He will be sorely missed. Youknow, as far as my kind of
thoughts about Quincy, you know,obviously he was influential
with Michael Jackson's career,yep, I grew up on that album,
yeah, yeah, thriller. I mean, Iremember playing that over and

(18:37):
over and over. Were you an offthe wall fan? Do you remember,
not as much, really have thatalbum, but you know, I liked, I
like a lot of his stuff. I knowa lot of Michael Jackson's
earlier stuff.
Speaking of thriller, I saw astory that made me chuckle.

(18:58):
You know, he produced, or had ahand in producing that, that
album, and particularly thatsong.
And when he gave it to Michael,he Michael felt that the intro
to the song was, was toooverbearing
in what way, and just just toomuch. It kind of like he didn't

(19:18):
he just didn't like the intro.
He didn't like the horns and andeverything else. He said it was
a bit too much, like, everybodycan hear that in your Yeah. I
mean, that's, it's iconic. And,you know, Quincy told Mike, you
know, basically, to shut thehell up. This is what the song
is going to be. And it turnedout to be, yeah, what it is,
what you know, but Quincydidn't, didn't always have that.
Well, I mean, I should sayeverybody, every creator, has,

(19:43):
you know, one, you know, acouple things or misses, yeah,
some hits or misses. Anotherstory I read about Quincy was,
he was the executive producer ofThe Fresh Prince of Bel Air. And
before that, before that showaired.
He has sent Will Smith the theintro, and it wasn't the intro

(20:04):
that we we know and love today.
And Will Smith was on aninterview, and he said that
Quincy sent him the song, andwill hated it. He didn't like it
at all, and he had spoke toJazzy Jeff, and he said, Man, I
don't like this intro. I thinkit sucks. And then Jazzy Jeff

(20:28):
was like, Hey, I got somethinghere. Let's put something
together. And within, like, aday,
you know, they came up with thetheme song for the first prince,
and they finished it and andJazzy Jeff was like, Well, hey,
you got to send this to Quincynow. And Will, Will Smith was
like, so scared. He's like, Idon't know, man. He's like, and

(20:49):
then Jazzy Jeff eventuallyconvinced him to do it. So he
sent the song to Quincy, andQuincy heard it. And Will Smith
was, you know, stated aninterview. It's like, I was just
so nervous about what he's gonnasay. Was he gonna trash it,
whatever. And then Quincy Joneswas like, Well, this is better
than that bullshit I came upwith, so let's just use this. So

(21:10):
that's why we got that. That'show we got the Fresh Prince. But
obviously that's good. He didn'thave, like, a huge ego. No, no
no, he he produced. We are theworld Correct? Yes. And I saw
that documentary latest nightand pop music or something like
that. It was interesting,because he did have such, I
mean, he was the one who broughteverybody together. You know, he

(21:33):
was able to attract all thesuperstars because he
represented a lot of them, or heproduced for them. So
that was one of the, I guess,themes, if you read his
obituary, about how he was aconnector and able to bring
people together to collaborateon projects. So that was, that's
really interesting documentary.
And, yeah, I never saw him in agreat light, but I just
remember, and, you know, this isa midlife podcast, so I assume I

(21:56):
was old enough to remember whenthat video came out. And I
remember back then as a as achild or young adult man, what
an eclectic group of people inthis video. And I just couldn't
believe how he was able to getall these people and all these

(22:17):
egos together to make this song.
Now, obviously the song was fora greater good, and I guess you
would look dumb if for turningit down, but some people did
turn it down or like they leftearly because they were annoyed,
yeah, so there was all sorts ofdrama behind it. Oh, wow, yeah,
yeah. I heard some stories ofpoor people, yeah. I heard some

(22:40):
stories about people maybe, andmaybe being intoxicated while
doing it, and things of thatnature. But yeah, that was, that
was a, you know, obviously, aniconic moment in music history.
And, yeah, I mean, speaking ofsimplistic messages, I mean, I
didn't love that song. I thinkbecause of that, you know,
because I didn't think it wasthat
great of a song. And some peopletalked about that. I mean,

(23:03):
really, you read, you read,like, some, um, journalists or,
you know, music reviewers kindof panning it, because the song
itself is not great in terms ofright, deep, but it really
resonated with a lot of people,and it raised a lot of money,
money, yeah, I think, I thinkyou're right. You know, if you
go back and they're like, playthe lyrics back in your head.

(23:23):
It's very simple, but I think,but I guess that's what, I don't
think that was the point. Yeah,yeah, it was catchy, and it was
just the fact that, you know,all these music Titans were able
to come in and do a song toraise money. I don't think the
actual song is that important?
It's not, you know, it's notlike the Beatles or anything

(23:44):
like that. It's just a song toraise awareness and and raise
money for a cause. And, youknow, it did what it was
supposed to do. So, no, he was,he was one of a kind, and I
think he was very, you know, hecame from, I think, a poor
background and didn't have agreat upbringing, but, you know,
somehow he persevered, and he'slike, one of the most famous

(24:04):
people in the world, you know.
So, yeah, yeah. Well, God, restin peace. God bless you, Quincy,
and thank you for yourcontributions to music and
society as a whole. You will bemissed for sure, for sure.
So I was out last weekend beforea friend's birthday. There was a

(24:26):
group of people out for herbirthday, and one of her friends
is kind of a new, newish friendto me. We were talking, and
somehow the point or the topicof age was brought up. I mean,
was this a guy or this is a guy.
This is a guy. I don't know whyage is always seeming to me to
be brought up in in socialconversations, but whatever. So

(24:49):
somebody point out the fact thatthis gentleman was older than
me. Now normally, let mepreface that. Let me pray.
Was thatnormally, normally, and what the
people that I hang out with, andI hang out with a lot of college
buddies that are my age, but youknow, on occasion, I hang out

(25:11):
with people slightly youngerthan me, still in the midlife
demographic, but they're alittle bit younger than me. So
this was a mixed group. It was amixed group of ages, okay, well,
yeah, so I would say 4042 andabove. Okay, okay, so I thought
this gentleman was, was the ageof around the age of the

(25:33):
birthday girl? Okay, who was howold? 4243 something like that.
So anyway, it was brought up hisage. And I was like, I mean,
man, how old are you? I waslike, I'm 56
I was like, Wow. I was reallystartled that he was 56 he does

(25:55):
not look 56and a little part of me was, uh,
how far did he look?
I say 40s, 40s, mid 40s. Yeah,okay,
a part of me was was celebratingbecause I wasn't the oldest guy
in the in the in the group. So Iwas like, yes, but

(26:19):
anyway, you felt like he lookedyounger than you, right? I
didn't say he looked youngerthan me. I just said he didn't
look 56 right? Okay.
So I said, Wow, man, 56 That'scrazy. That's like, You're older
than me. I had to put that outthere, you're older than me.
He's like, how old are you? Iwas like, I'm 55 I said, I never
would have guessed save, youknow, kind of like we're doing,

(26:40):
like this spider man meme, likepointing at each other. And I
was like, yeah, so how do you doit? He's like, Well, it's a
combination thing, you know,obviously I exercise, and he
looked fit,and he said, You know, I take
all these supplements. And wetalked about it. We talked about
before, on a prior podcast,found out he takes a lot more

(27:04):
supplements than I do stuff Ihad never even heard of. He
might be an interesting guestfor the show. One day, I was
gonna say, we need to invitehim. Yeah, 100%
but he also said he does Botox.
Oh, and I was like, Wow. I'venever, you know, I obviously, I
men can be Botox, yeah, but I'venever witnessed a man who said

(27:28):
he does Botox, right, who openlyadmits, openly admits it, yeah?
And I thought that never metanybody. No, okay, yeah, no,
well, this is my first, yeah, soI was thinking, wow, that's,
that's really cool, that he adoes Botox, and B, he's, you

(27:48):
know, willing, willinglyadmitting that he does Botox.
Where was it? Just on this,like, you know, I
think he's dyes and yeah, eyesand forehead, something like
that. I'm not privy you didn'tdig into it. Yeah,

(28:12):
bro, but I thought that was socool, and it made me think, like
other midlife marauders gettingBotox. Or do we find that cool
that men are doing Botox? Whatare your thoughts on that? I
mean, I am. I feel like whateveryou want to do, as long as not

(28:34):
hurting other people. Go for it,right? You know. I mean, you
definitely see people withBotox. You're like, ooh, we know
that person got Botox is superobvious, you know, so and it'll
often it doesn't look good, butif it looks natural and he you
can't really tell, then, youknow. And if it makes them
happy, that's great. Well,here's the thing, though, Max,
it's funny that you say that Ithink men are a little bit

(28:55):
different than women in thisperspective, you say it's it's
not you can tell normally, whena let's just say when a woman
does, if it goes too far theirlips. Yeah, okay, yeah, fillers
and fillers and stuff like that.
I can tell. That's why we needdetail from him. We do get him
on the show. But for men, Idon't really analyze men's

(29:15):
faces. Okay, after you found outhe had Botox. Well, no, not from
a lack of trying, though, okay,which I felt a little awkward.
The place was dimly lit.
Okay? It was dimly lit. So metrying to analyze his face would

(29:40):
have looked peculiar because,you know, I'm staring this man
down in a dimly lit, dimly litrestaurant, but he said, you
know he's done it before. Youknow, he says he does a lot of
stuff that he feels like hemaybe doesn't need to do it
regularly. Okay? I was able tokind.
To glance at his forehead andaround his eyes

(30:07):
without staring too deeply inhis eyes, just kind of glancing
looks. But I did notice that hedid not have, at least from what
I could see, forehead wrinkles,and he did not have what was it
called, crows eyes, feet aroundhis his eyes.
NowI, I'm not gonna lie to you, I

(30:29):
have entertainedthe thought of getting Botox
recently, or what I would saywithin the last three years, I
would say, Okay, I don't think Ineed it, not. I'm pretty sure my
friends would would say thesame. But I do notice that my
forehead is has, you know,wrinkles. You know, I'm 55 years

(30:53):
old, obviously, yeah,but I don't have a problem with
around my eyes or anything likethat. I think I'm Gucci and that
concern, but my forehead couldbe a little more tighter, so to
speak. Okay, so it kind ofbrought up these thoughts of,
well, maybe you should just tryBotox, because a lot of women

(31:16):
that I know yes, just to say,yes, a lot of women that I know,
that I you know, that are myfriends, and that are of our
midlife years. They do, they dogo in for Botox. They do, do
look fillers. They do, can theytalk about it? They tell you
about it, and that's how youknow, or you just, yeah, yeah,
yeah. I will. Sometimes I ask,but you know, if it's obviously

(31:37):
noticeable, but do you do youthink it's cool, like, well,
obviously you just said, yes,that men are doing this. Is it
becoming more acceptable insociety? You feel that that men
are doing this? I think so. Imean, I think if somebody wants
to look better and they thinkit's going to make you look

(31:57):
better, I think that's apersonal choice, right? But I do
love the openness of you knowthat we that we're having now in
society. Of, we're comfortablekind of telling the world, you
know what we do. Which leads meto my next subject, of,

(32:21):
I am seeing more and more ads ofsexual enhancement drugs
for men, erectile dysfunctiondrugs, okay, yes, like Viagra,
Viagra Cialis, you know. Andthere's a huge market for that,

(32:41):
but that was always kind oflike,
you know, low key, not not somuch taboo, but you kind of just
wanted to keep that quiet. But Ireally kind of a joke, like
people didn't want to talk aboutit, yeah, I mean, it's not a
joke if you needed,yeah, people wouldn't joke
around about Viagra, for sure,but I did see an ad the other

(33:02):
day where it was a man and awoman, and this is the first
time I've seen this type of adwhere, you know, they were
partners and sexual partners,and he was openly telling her
that I am going to take thisdrug for an enhancement, and he

(33:29):
didn't have to hide it. He'ssaying, hey, it's gonna take 15
minutes and we're gonna get thisthing cracking. And she and she
was all four. She's like, Yeah,so it didn't ruin the moment.
No, it didn't ruin the moment.
And that's, that'sand I'm gonna be honest to the
world. I have taken, taking,taken, taken these drugs before.
Now, full disclosure, I do nothave an ED problem.

(33:59):
I took it out of curiosity, andthen if I've ever, and if I've
taken it again, I've taken it askind of a boost. So to say so,
okay, I have a lot of questionslike, who this person was,
anyhow, yeah, go ahead. Okay, sofirst impressions, right? First

(34:20):
impressions are the you know youin full disclosure, if
not all the time, but if I'mintimate with a person for the
first time, right, I'm morelikely to take something just so
I ensure that I'm at my best.
Oh, that's interesting. Youunderstand what I'm saying. It's

(34:45):
like, are you carrying a pillaround with you when you just
plan it? You know, it's kind oflike a condom or something. Like
you have it on your person,like, you know,
you got your little your kit. I.
I may. I don't. I wouldn't say Icarried it around, but it's,
it's I know where to reach it,if, particularly if I'm at home,

(35:09):
or if I know it's going to be,quote, unquote a road game, I
will probably equip that in thecar, or something of that
nature. But that's, again,that's first impression. So you
want to come out, you know whenyou want to come out swinging,
you know you want to hit a grandslam in your first at bat. You
know you don't want to whiff.

(35:31):
Pun intended. And so you've donethis once or a lot of times,
like, like, what's like? Are youhappy that you've tried this?
I've done enough. It's kind ofrisky, right, for a first date
or a first person first time.
No, it's not, no, not a firstdate. I mean, it's not like
that. It's something where I've,you know, we've gone out on
date. You know, you could tellwhen it's, it's a natural

(35:52):
progression of things. You know,we're, we're going to be
romantic, right? But you'venever, but it's the first time
that you guys are, yeah, yeah,the first time and again. It's
just been, like, maybe a handfulof times, and not with every
person that I've been with isjust, you know, this is

(36:14):
something to try, you know,maybe, maybe with the results.
You're happy the way things willgo. Yes, for sure, for sure.
Maybe, maybe I wasn't feelinggreat. Or maybe, you know, I had
a, you know, physically, or, youknow, whatever, you know, you
can't keep pushing these, youknow, opportunities to the side.

(36:35):
You got to strike when the ironis high. So if I felt like a
certain way, like, man,maybe, okay,
I'll do this, this one time, orwhatever. It's not that big of a
deal. And any partners that I'vehad, it's not like I pop one
every single time. You knowwhat? I mean. It's just, you

(36:57):
know, so, one off, yeah.
So anyway, back to my originalpoint. I just think it's so cool
now that we are open and havingdialogs men and women about
about this. Because okay, buthere's my question, they're
saying that. But so before youtook it, or when you were did

(37:20):
you have this dialog? No, see,it's different from the
commercial, right? Thatcommercial is kind of
unrealistic, but here's a date,here's the difference, here's
the difference. Max,these two people that I saw in
this commercial, they were in arelationship. Okay, yeah, so
they talk about that's why theytalk about it. The the handful

(37:40):
of times I've done it, we hadnot talked or set up, or we
weren't set up in arelationship, this is like a
first romantic encounter nowthat might have led to a
relationship later. And if thatwere the case, I would have had
that conversation about about,hey, sometimes, you know, you

(38:02):
know, I'm not feeling mygreatest I might take something
to get it popping a little bit,you know, I'm saying right? So
you're not setting up theexpectation that it's always
going to be.
When you put it like that, maybeI am setting up a false
expectation. But it's not that.
It's not trying. I'm not tryingto blow their mind. So to speak,

(38:25):
I'm just want to make sure thatyou know, I'm good to go, that
I'm I'm, you know, that I'mgoing to be close to my my peak,
so to speak,just so it's not a, you know,
it's not a letdown for allparties involved. Not saying it
would be with the choices you'vemade, and you would discuss it

(38:49):
with your partner, yes, if youwere, if you stayed with them,
yes, if that's what you think iscool, because it's no longer a
stick. There's no stigma. It'snot taboo to talk about it.
Well, yes. And I think, youknow, obviously, as as you know,
we're in our midlife years, youknow, both sides, both genders,
could haveissues sexually. Yeah, I Yeah,

(39:13):
right. And I think that it's, Ithink that that, that that veil
has been lifted. Like, hey,let's not, let's not be
frustrated, you know, let's talkabout it. You know, as a midlife
man, I may not be100% like, you know, when I was
in my 20s or 30s, you know, Imean, but I'm, yeah, I agree.

(39:36):
You understand what I'm sayingbetter now, yeah, and be more
open. We can be more open. Wecan talk about it like, hey, you
know, I want to do this,you know, I'm excited, but
physically,I might not be responding the
way I used to. Or, you know,maybe this one time, or whatever
that we can say, hey, you knowwhat? I.

(40:00):
I'm gonna do something to toenhance this, to make it more
pleasurable for for bothparties. And I think that's so
cool now that we don't have tolive in the shadows. We don't,
you know, we don't, you know,it's particularly in a
relationship that men don't haveto, like,
you know, try to hide it anddelay, oh, I can't do anything

(40:21):
for 20 minutes. You know? Youknow, let it sit. You know, you
know what I mean,unless it's cold and then, oh,
it kicks in like, Oh, I'm readynow. You know what I mean.
Thanks for joining us for thisepisode of midlife marauders.
Follow us on social media andwherever you stream your

(40:42):
podcast. We also want to give abig shout out to Frank Moyn at
Moines music for providing thebeats for our theme music and to
our listeners, keep on maraudingand see you next time you