Can grief be a lifelong journey rather than something to "get over"? Join me as we explore this profound question through the courageous stories of individuals who have faced the depths of loss with remarkable strength. Grief transforms over time and how love continues to inspire and shape our lives even after those we cherish are gone. The importance of integrating the memory of loved ones into our daily routines will allow their legacy to bring us strength and inspiration.
"Navigating Grief and Finding Grace" reminds us of the importance of processing emotions at our own pace, taking necessary breaks, and seeking support. The enduring power of love as a comforting force, helping to keep the memory of our loved ones alive in new and meaningful ways. By embracing a non-linear path of grief with self-compassion and gentleness, we honor the unique spirits of those we've lost and find moments of joy amidst the sadness. Let's celebrate the legacy of loved ones and let their memory continue to shape and inspire our lives.
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Episode Transcript
I want to share something from my heart,
something deeply honest andgenuine.
One of my patients recentlylost someone close to them and
just thinking about this patient, I feel so much compassion, so
much love and so muchinspiration.
Seeing the rawness of theiremotions and how they are
courageously paying attention toand holding space for their
(00:21):
grief in therapy with me hasbeen incredibly moving.
This experience is a big reasonthat inspired me to put this
message out there.
If you're in the midst ofgrieving, or have been for a
long time, I want to tell youthat I am so deeply sorry for
your loss.
I really am, and I understandhow painful and alone this
experience can feel.
(00:42):
Even with supportive peoplearound us, it can, and often
does, feel absolutely lonely,and I hope I really do that.
You see how strong this is,because this is love and I
respect you so much for holdingspace for that love.
And here's the truth.
And this may soundunconventional, but it's real
when you lose a loved one, youwill grieve forever.
(01:03):
You don't get over it.
You're not supposed to.
You learn to live with it andmove forward with it.
Grief becomes a part of yourlife story.
I don't want to offer youcliches or the usual
reassurances about grief.
The truth is, everyone grievesdifferently.
That's for certain.
Sometimes we don't know whythings happen the way they do,
(01:23):
and sometimes we don't need tohave an answer.
But I believe that the rightpeople are brought into our
lives at the right time, and ifyou are here listening to this,
I want you to know that I'm herefor you.
Over the years, I've supportedmany people through their grief,
whether from tragic deaths,natural deaths, from kids to
adults.
(01:43):
One thing is certain Griefchanges us.
We're not supposed to remainthe same afterward as the
emotional waves and tides come.
Don't be afraid.
The intensity and power ofthese emotions reveal something
beautiful.
Stand brave and grounded,knowing that this is love.
(02:04):
Grief isn't about letting go.
It's all about cultivating love.
Grief is not something you'resupposed to get over or that
will simply pass.
It's a sign of the deep loveyou still have for the person
who is no longer physicallypresent.
This love doesn't disappear.
It transforms and becomes apart of you.
You don't get over it afterlosing a loved one.
(02:27):
Instead, you learn to find away to honor them.
You allow their memory andspirit to remain alive through
the choices you make and the wayyou live your life.
Honoring your loved one canmean carrying forward the values
and lessons they imparted toyou, continuing traditions they
cherished or even making newones in their memory.
(02:47):
Their presence can be felt inthe small everyday moments when
you recall their laughter, theiradvice or their comforting
presence.
This ongoing connection addsprofound meaning to your life
long after they're gone.
By integrating their memoryinto your daily life, you
transform your grief into atestament of enduring love.
(03:09):
It becomes a source of strengthand inspiration, reminding you
of the impact they had on yourlife.
This way, their legacycontinues shaping you and
guiding you, even in theirphysical absence.
I've learned something profoundthrough my own personal losses,
and it's something I often sharewith others Even when someone
(03:32):
is gone, we still have theopportunity to build, nurture
and cultivate that relationshipwith them.
Their physical absence doesn'tmean the end of our connection.
In many ways, it marks thebeginning of a deeper, more
introspective bond.
I want you to reach a placewhere you can talk about that
(03:53):
person freely and fondly.
Remember them not just in theirfinal moments, but for how they
lived, what they stood for andthe unique spirit they brought
into the world.
Think about their laughter,their wisdom and the moments
that define brought into theworld.
Think about their laughter,their wisdom and the moments
that define your relationshipwith them.
They matter to you immenselyand that significance doesn't
(04:14):
vanish with their passing.
Why on earth would we want toforget someone who brought so
much meaning into our lives?
Why wouldn't we feel a deep,soulful sadness that they are no
longer physically by our side?
It's okay to mourn to miss themand to let those emotions wash
over you.
In embracing these feelings, wehonor their memory and keep
(04:36):
their spirit alive within us.
Waves of emotions will surface,random memories will appear at
the most unexpected moments.
Welcome them, notice them.
The only way to heal and findpeace is to allow yourself to
truly feel and process theseemotions.
You don't have to take it allin at once and you don't need to
(04:57):
collapse under the weight ofyour grief.
It's okay to take time off tolet people know you're
struggling and to acknowledgeyour limits.
Give yourself the space andalone time you need to process
your emotions.
Do whatever you need to do tobe with your grief.
Remember it's okay to takebreaks during this process.
(05:18):
It's okay to smile again, tofind moments of joy amidst the
sadness.
It's okay, you have time,there's no rush and your journey
is uniquely yours.
Allow yourself the grace tofeel, to remember and to find a
(05:40):
new way forward thatincorporates new insights, the
loss, the whirlwind of emotionsand their legacy into your life.
Let the grief shine a light onwhat's most important to you,
because you are there.
At the core, this matters.
Love transcends everything.
Even in the face of loss, loveremains a powerful force that
(06:04):
connects us to those who are nolonger physically present.
It is through this enduringlove that we keep their memory
alive and find the strength tomove forward, carrying them as a
part of us.
Grief at its core is anexpression of this profound love
, a testament to the deep bondswe shared and will continue to
(06:25):
share.
Love doesn't diminish with loss.
It evolves.
It allows us to honor andcherish our loved ones in new
and meaningful ways.
This love transcends time andspace, continuing to shape our
lives and offering comfortamidst the sorrow.
Let this love guide you, healyou and remind you that your
(06:46):
loved one is forever woven intothe fabric of your being.
Remember there's no timelinefor grief.
There's no clear destination.
Let go of the expectations thatyou need to move on.
Be gentle with yourself.
Learn to surf the waves and letit be your guide to where you
need to move on.
Be gentle with yourself, learnto surf the waves and let it be
(07:07):
your guide.
No-transcript.
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