Ever wish you could just ask someone what to do when midlife feels messy, unclear, or overwhelming? Now you can. Welcome to the very first episode of Ask Mind Your Midlife, a new Q&A series where I answer your real questions about confidence, mindset, purpose, and more—with practical ideas to get unstuck and feel more like yourself again.
In this episode, I’m tackling three listener questions: how to start meditating (without sitting still for hours), how to find purpose and passion after 50, and yes—even why I wear so much green.
BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU’LL DISCOVER:
✔ Two easy ways to start meditating even if you’re busy, skeptical, or fidgety
✔ How to reframe the idea of “purpose” and start following your curiosity
✔ A mindset trick for reconnecting with what lights you up in midlife
✔ What your favorite color might say about your energy—and how to use that intentionally
🎯 OMG Moment: Midlife is your time to take just a little bit better care of yourself. It matters - and it works.
Take Action
Have a midlife mindset question you want me to answer? Scroll down and click the link to text me your question for a future episode of Ask Mind Your Midlife.
Listen to the meditation episode.
Why This Episode Matters
Whether you’re figuring out your next chapter, exploring new habits, or just craving more confidence and joy in midlife, your questions matter. This new series gives us a chance to connect directly—and help you create the midlife you actually want.
🎧 Hit follow now and join me next week as we dive into SLEEP - and how to finally get the rest you deserve.
Text me to ask a question - I'll answer on the podcast!
🌸 Liked this episode? Share it with fellow midlife women over 40 navigating hormone balance, an empty nest, and self-confidence!
🫶 Love this show? Leave a review to help more women over 50 find us.
💡Want support through menopause, mindset shifts, or midlife transitions?
Book a free Mindset Coaching / Intro Call: cherylpfischer.com/coaching, and join us in Midlife Pivot on Patreon.
Let’s talk self-care, self-talk, and owning your next chapter—without the “midlife crisis” narrative.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Cheryl Fischer (00:00):
One thing about a podcast is I get to talk to
you every week and maybe evenbonus episodes, like we've had
this past week and yet you don'tnecessarily get to talk to me,
and I am a coach, really, and ateacher, so I want to know what
you want to know, and that iswhy this is the first episode of
(00:25):
Ask Mind your Midlife.
I have some questions that youhave given me as a listener and
I'm excited to answer them andI'm excited to hear what you're
going to ask next.
So here we go Welcome to Mindyour Midlife, your go-to
resource for confidence andsuccess, one thought at a time.
(00:49):
Unlike most advice out there,we believe that simply telling
you to believe in yourself orchange your habits isn't enough
to wake up excited about life orfeel truly confident in your
body.
Each week, you'll gainactionable strategies and oh my
goodness powerful insights tostop feeling stuck and start
(01:10):
loving your midlife.
This is the Mind your Midlifepodcast.
So, because this is the veryfirst Ask Find your Midlife
episode, I'm going to do thisabout once a month, once every
six weeks.
I'm not going to I don't know,we'll see how it flows but
because this is the very firstone, I put the word out on
(01:33):
social media and if we're notconnected yet on social media,
find me.
I'm on most of them.
As Cheryl P Fisher, come find me.
I would love to connect withyou.
Send me a DM.
Whatever it is that's on yourmind, either when you're
listening to a podcast like thisone about midlife, or when
(01:54):
you're just going through yourday and you're getting
frustrated about something.
That's what I want you to askabout, because maybe I can give
you just a little tweak to howyou're thinking about that, just
a little slight different anglethat you can look at your
situation from.
Or maybe something you canactually do to make a change.
(02:16):
We all need help with thatsometimes.
Or maybe you have a questionthat's going to jog me to grab
an expert in that particulararea and bring them on for an
episode.
I'm totally open to that aswell.
So find me on social, cheryl PFisher.
There'll be links in the shownotes.
Send me a DM, tell me what yourquestions are, and there will
(02:40):
be a link in the show notes andthere has been for the past few
episodes saying ask mind yourmidlife a question, click that
link and you're basically goingto be able to text me a question
, so don't be surprised when itbecomes a text.
It's real, it's not anythingweird or scammy.
Text me a question.
I would love to get them thatway too.
All right, so here we go.
(03:02):
Today, I have two of yourquestions and I have a third one
that's just kind of funny, soyou can ask me funny stuff too.
I suppose these came in onthreads and Instagram recently,
and I have a few more that camein as well, so we'll keep it
rolling.
As I said, this won't be aone-off episode.
First question says I saw youtalk about meditation a while
(03:29):
ago.
Should I try it and is there aneasy way?
Great question, and yes, I didtalk about meditation a while
ago.
That was when the podcast wasstill under the old name name.
Omg, teach Me.
No worries, you can go find theepisode either by clicking in
(03:52):
the show notes I'm going to putthe link in there or by going to
Mind your Midlife on yourpodcast app, which you probably
are in right now, now that Ithink about it, and scrolling
down and finding episode 58 fromback in May of 2024.
And again, it'll be linked inthe show notes.
(04:13):
Let's make it easy.
But yes, we did talk aboutmeditation.
Angela Smith joined me on thatepisode and she kind of blew my
mind because I knew that I wassupposed to meditate and I
didn't do it.
If I'm being honest, I didn'tdo it.
(04:34):
I didn't feel like I had time,I didn't want to sit still, I
feel you if that's what's goingthrough your mind when you think
about meditation, and what sheexplains in that episode is that
it's not just a woo-woo thingthat we need to um our way
through the day.
It's healthy for our brains andI am a brain science nerd.
(05:00):
I was absolutely fascinatedwhen she was talking about that.
So starting to practicemeditation, even if it's five
minutes, starts to teach yourbrain how to refocus, teaches
your nervous system how to calmdown.
(05:20):
So healthy for, just I meanevery part of your body.
I'm not going to revamp thatwhole episode, that wasn't
really the question but it's sohealthy and the goal is not to
start with 20 minutes or 30minutes or an hour of meditation
(05:41):
, because your brain is notgoing to work with you, because
you haven't taught it thisreally important skill of
bringing focus back and calmingdown.
So we start small and I have ananswer for you, because the
question was should I try?
Yes, yes, you should.
(06:03):
Is there an easy way?
I'm going to tell you how Ihave started meditating and see
if this will work for you,because I needed an easy way.
I had all the brain goingeverywhere and busy day and all
of that, so I needed an easy wayas well.
Actually, I have twosuggestions for you.
So start with five minutes.
(06:24):
Number one and I am kind of bestfriends with my timer on my
Apple Watch.
I use the timer all the time.
I use it when I'm cooking orwhen I'm supposed to be doing
something in a few minutes, or Ijust use it all the time.
I put timers on all the time.
Sometimes then, when it goesoff, I can't remember what the
timer was for, but eventually Ido.
So put a timer on for fiveminutes and I do what I call the
(06:54):
legs up against the wallmeditation.
There is a yoga pose called legsup against the wall, and it is
exactly what it sounds like legsup against the wall, and it is
exactly what it sounds like.
You scoot your butt forward,sitting on the ground, until you
get as close to the wall as youcan, and then you are lying
with your back on the floor andyour legs are up against the
(07:16):
wall, so your body's in an LSuper, super, super healthy for
blood flow.
If you have issues like I do,where your feet swell, super
healthy for blood flow.
If you have issues like I do,where your feet swell, getting
those feet above your heart fora little bit of time each day,
really healthy, you can lookthat up as well.
It's a super healthy thing todo and so I do that because I
know I need to and I meditatewhile doing it.
(07:40):
So I'm lying on the floor withmy legs up against a wall or
often up against a chair orwhatever is around me, and I set
my watch for five minutes and Iclose my eyes and I either am
counting to myself one, two, onewith the taking a breath in and
two with taking a breath out,or in out, and the reason you
(08:04):
hear of people doing um orsomething like that is it's good
to give your brain kind of ananchor word to focus on.
So, depending on my mood, Imight be doing in, out with my
breath, or one, two justsilently in my head, and I just
lie there and I do that and Itry to just be calm and empty my
head.
Now, when you try this, youwill not be able to empty your
(08:29):
head for five minutes, unlessyou already are a great
meditator.
You're going to think aboutother things.
Little worries are going tocreep in.
You're going to think aboutwhat you're making for dinner.
You're going to think aboutthat top that you saw online.
It's okay and you'll hearAngela say this if you go back
and listen to that episode.
It's okay.
(08:50):
The power of meditation isknowing how to bring your mind
back, that doing that, bringingyour mind back is possibly the
biggest benefit of meditation.
So it's okay.
If your mind wanders, don't getupset at yourself.
Don't tell yourself that youknow I could never do this.
(09:13):
I knew I couldn't do this.
It's normal, and the act ofcoming back from that is the
best part.
So you realize oh wait, why amI thinking about what I'm making
for dinner?
And you go back and you say one, two with your in and out
breath, deep breaths.
You could add some breath workin while you're at it, sort of
an average to slow pace, andthen, when your timer goes off,
(09:37):
pat yourself on the back.
That's your very first fiveminutes of meditation, and you
can keep going with five minutes, or you could gradually
increase it if it's feeling goodfor you and you're liking it.
That is the way I startedmeditating and it really it's
kind of two birds with one stonefor me, and so I hope you'll
try it.
I want you to tell me again,find me on social, tell me what
(09:59):
did you think?
The second suggestion I have foryou is what Angela called the
five senses meditation, and Ilove this one too.
So right now, where I am in DC,it's hot.
It's like heat warning hot, andso you may be in that same boat
with me, and so I'm be in thatsame boat with me, and so I'm
not walking around outside, if Ican help it, unless it's early
(10:21):
or late.
But if you are going for a walkmaybe you're going for a hike
you can meditate in an activeway as well, and there are so
many brain benefits to this aswell, and so while you're out on
your walk, you can do a littleexercise of recognizing, with
all five senses, what's aroundyou.
(10:43):
So what do you see?
Notice what's around you?
What do you smell?
Are there any smells?
What do you hear?
Notice what the sounds are thatare going on around you?
What are you touching?
Does the air have a feel?
Feel your feet hitting the pathor the sidewalk?
(11:04):
And do you taste anything?
Maybe you're walking by arestaurant?
Is there anything in the air?
Go through all your five sensesand just be observant and just
wonder, and even the practice ofthat, although it doesn't feel
like traditional meditation, isstill good for your brain in the
(11:24):
same way, and you can set atimer for this if you want to.
You know I love my timer andyou can go through and just
notice for five minutes and thencontinue on your walk doing
whatever else you were doing.
That is also a great way to try.
So I hope that answers yourquestion.
I love that question because Ithink it's going to help so many
(11:46):
people because, yes, there isan easy way to start.
Try one of those, try both ofthose, one one day, one the next
day.
See what you like best.
Just do it with like a lightand easy energy.
There's no wrong, there's nobad.
Everything you do related tohelping your brain and body
relax and calm down and focus isgood.
It does help, all right.
(12:08):
Question two how do I rediscoverpurpose and passion after age
50?
Rediscover purpose and passionafter age 50?
This came in on threadsrecently and I actually love
that.
You asked this question becauseLisa Andrea joined me on the
podcast a week ago on episode 38.
(12:29):
So go go head down there andfind it while you're listening
to the podcast if you haven'theard that one.
And she is a transformationcoach, and so what we were
talking about was gettingthrough limiting beliefs, and
what she then talked with meabout for my Patreon members was
how to rediscover your purposeand passion.
(12:51):
Oh, my goodness, there we gothis.
I did not plant this question,I promise.
There we go this.
I did not plant this question,I promise.
So if you haven't heard thatbonus discussion on Mind your
Midlife Pivot on Patreon, go topatreoncom.
Slash mindyourmidlife.
All of the material, all of theinterviews, all of the bonuses
(13:12):
are still accessible in the joinfor free version through the
end of August, so you can catchit Now.
That being said, I've had a fewepisodes recently with people
who focus on helping us tofigure out our second act that
was Shannon Russell, you canfind that one too and at looking
at our lives like a story thatwas Anna Parker and figuring out
(13:38):
what's next in the story andhow does it all connect?
And I have to say, when I thinkabout rediscovering a passion,
I think about something that youlove to do.
So maybe when you're in your50s I'm in my 50s, so I think
we're all in the same boat herewhen you're in your 50s, maybe
you've been doing whatever yourcareer is for a long time and
(14:03):
you know you're not going to bedoing it forever.
Or maybe you hope that andyou're starting to watch your
friends retire and you'restarting to watch your friends
go and do the travel or do thevolunteering, or get involved in
fun things or play pickleballin the middle of the morning or
whatever it is, and you'rethinking, well, how can I do
(14:24):
that?
What fun things would I want todo?
So this might be purpose andpassion in terms of fun aspects
of your post-career life, or itmight be purpose and passion in
terms of I am ready to make achange.
I've got 10 years in my careerleft, or something like that.
What do I want to do?
(14:45):
So there's kind of two piecesto that.
But I want you if I culltogether all the advice that
we've heard recently I want youto think about what you enjoy,
what you are enthusiastic about,when you have a day where
(15:05):
you're like, wow, that was agood day, great things happened.
What were those things?
What types of interactions wereyou having with that work and
with people?
Was it a one-on-one situation?
Was it that you weren't havingto be around people a lot?
Was it a large group of people?
How did the interaction go thatenergized you and that you felt
(15:28):
good about?
What was the action you weretaking?
Was it data analysis?
Was it speaking?
Was it something else?
Find the patterns and thenthink back to when you were
younger and think about what didyou do for fun?
When you were a kid, I actuallyplayed school.
(15:50):
I played school and I playedthis crazy game called plant
doctor that my friend and I madeup.
It's not worth explaining, butanyway I was always diagnosing
and teaching, I guess.
And think about the things thatyou thought were fun.
Now you probably can't go bikearound your neighborhood for a
living.
Now you probably can't go bikearound your neighborhood for a
(16:10):
living, but maybe you need to bemore active in what you're
doing.
Or maybe you have really apassion for fitness.
Maybe there's a thread therethat you can pull, and so how do
you rediscover your purpose andyour passion?
See what those threads are thatlink everything in your story.
(16:31):
See if there's anything thatyou're doing right now, that
there's a piece of that thatyou're excited about.
Can you add more of that?
Can you make a slightadjustment?
This takes time and it takestrial and error, and the trial
and error is what you learn from.
So that will get you startedand I'm super excited about that
(16:51):
.
Make sure you're in Patreon soyou can hear my talk with Lisa
Andrea about this exact thingand I hope that answers your
question.
I know everybody has thatquestion, so thank you for
asking.
All right Now the last one fortoday's Q&A.
Today's Ask Mind your Midlifeis why do you wear green all the
(17:13):
time?
And this question made me laughbecause I do wear a lot of
green.
Now, actually you're not seeingme probably as you are
listening to this, but Iactually don't have green on
today.
I have a pink shirt on.
So it's amusing that I'manswering this question, but I
do wear green a lot and I knowit was kind of meant to be a fun
(17:35):
, silly question and I wasencouraging that and at the same
time.
I think maybe there's a littlesomething we can learn from this
too.
So why do I wear green all thetime?
Because green has been almostmy entire life my favorite color
.
It makes me happy.
It just makes me happy.
As I was thinking about this, Iwas wondering why is that?
(17:57):
And I really think it's becauseso much in nature is green.
I think somehow I have aconnection between leaves on
trees and that sort of thingwith the color green, because I
like that bright, leaf green,kelly green sort of thing with
the color green, cause I likethat bright, like leaf green,
kelly green especially.
(18:18):
And and that's a good thingbecause being outside, being in
nature, forest bathing is a realthing.
It doesn't mean taking a bathin the forest, it just means
being there in the trees, in thenature is healthy.
That's a real thing.
And, interestingly, I love tocombine green with brown.
So there we go, I'm dressingmyself like a tree.
Let me also say we're in midlifeand let's dress how we want to
(18:43):
dress and let's pick the clothesand the colors that make us
happy and let's pick the funglasses or fun sunglasses.
It's time.
Maybe you've been doing thatall along and I applaud you if
that's the case, but a lot of ushaven't been.
We've been, maybe, trying toblend in.
(19:04):
We spend our teenage yearsreally trying to blend in and be
accepted, and that's completelynormal.
There's nothing wrong with that.
It's kind of a part of humandevelopment that we spend a
period of our lives as thecenter of our own worlds, and
that is the case as kids andthen as teens we're still sort
(19:26):
of the center of our own worlds,having trouble seeing other
people's perspectives, and we'restarting to see that we want to
be in their worlds.
So we're trying to fit in.
And that really hit me for sure.
It took me a long time to speakup when I want to stand up for
something.
It took me a long time to learnhow to do that.
So I encourage you at thispoint in midlife dress how you
(19:50):
want to dress, look how you wantto look, pick out the colors in
your house and in your wardrobethat make you happy, period.
And I guess that's what I dowith green.
It makes me happy, and whenpeople say, look, you're wearing
green again, I say yep, I don'tknow if you meant that to be a
negative, but I love it.
So that's the attitude that Iwish for you on anything like
(20:15):
that, and thank you for askingme that question.
I really do love it.
It makes me happy.
I hope that you found this Q&Ainteresting.
I am planning another one.
This is August.
We're going to do another onelate August, early September.
I can't wait to see whatquestions you have for me.
Scroll down in the show notes,click the link that says ask a
(20:36):
question.
You can text me a question or,as I said, find me on social
media.
Cheryl P Fisher.
Dm me a question and I willanswer it on the podcast.
I'm super excited to at leastbe able to connect with you in
this way.
Super excited to at least beable to connect with you in this
way.
So our OMG moment today is myfavorite piece of advice for us
(20:59):
midlife women.
Please be just a little bitmore kind to yourself.
Treat yourself just a littlebit better.
Better, and maybe that'sallowing yourself to have a
little bit more fun, like wewere just talking about.
Maybe it's eating a little bitbetter, having a little bit
(21:20):
healthier habits, maybe it's allthe thoughts.
Be a little bit more kind toyourself.
That's all it takes to have anamazing midlife.
We just need to treat ourselvesa little bit better than we
used to and watch what happens.
Now make sure that you have hitthe follow button, because next
(21:40):
week, speaking of treatingourselves a little bit better, I
have an expert coming to joinus to talk about sleep, one of
the most popular topics, because, goodness, when I sit down with
friends at brunch or wherever,are you talking about sleep?
Because we are, so I will seeyou.
Then she's going to help us outand, in the meantime, slow down
(22:03):
, notice what's going on aroundyou, notice what's going on in
your head, and let's createsomething amazing.
One thing about a podcast is I get to talk to
you every week and maybe evenbonus episodes, like we've had
this past week and yet you don'tnecessarily get to talk to me,
and I am a coach, really, and ateacher, so I want to know what
you want to know, and that iswhy this is the first episode of
(00:25):
Ask Mind your Midlife.
I have some questions that youhave given me as a listener and
I'm excited to answer them andI'm excited to hear what you're
going to ask next.
So here we go Welcome to Mindyour Midlife, your go-to
resource for confidence andsuccess, one thought at a time.
(00:49):
Unlike most advice out there,we believe that simply telling
you to believe in yourself orchange your habits isn't enough
to wake up excited about life orfeel truly confident in your
body.
Each week, you'll gainactionable strategies and oh my
goodness powerful insights tostop feeling stuck and start
(01:10):
loving your midlife.
This is the Mind your Midlifepodcast.
So, because this is the veryfirst Ask Find your Midlife
episode, I'm going to do thisabout once a month, once every
six weeks.
I'm not going to I don't know,we'll see how it flows but
because this is the very firstone, I put the word out on
(01:33):
social media and if we're notconnected yet on social media,
find me.
I'm on most of them.
As Cheryl P Fisher, come find me.
I would love to connect withyou.
Send me a DM.
Whatever it is that's on yourmind, either when you're
listening to a podcast like thisone about midlife, or when
(01:54):
you're just going through yourday and you're getting
frustrated about something.
That's what I want you to askabout, because maybe I can give
you just a little tweak to howyou're thinking about that, just
a little slight different anglethat you can look at your
situation from.
Or maybe something you canactually do to make a change.
(02:16):
We all need help with thatsometimes.
Or maybe you have a questionthat's going to jog me to grab
an expert in that particulararea and bring them on for an
episode.
I'm totally open to that aswell.
So find me on social, cheryl PFisher.
There'll be links in the shownotes.
Send me a DM, tell me what yourquestions are, and there will
(02:40):
be a link in the show notes andthere has been for the past few
episodes saying ask mind yourmidlife a question, click that
link and you're basically goingto be able to text me a question
, so don't be surprised when itbecomes a text.
It's real, it's not anythingweird or scammy.
Text me a question.
I would love to get them thatway too.
All right, so here we go.
(03:02):
Today, I have two of yourquestions and I have a third one
that's just kind of funny, soyou can ask me funny stuff too.
I suppose these came in onthreads and Instagram recently,
and I have a few more that camein as well, so we'll keep it
rolling.
As I said, this won't be aone-off episode.
First question says I saw youtalk about meditation a while
(03:29):
ago.
Should I try it and is there aneasy way?
Great question, and yes, I didtalk about meditation a while
ago.
That was when the podcast wasstill under the old name name.
Omg, teach Me.
No worries, you can go find theepisode either by clicking in
(03:52):
the show notes I'm going to putthe link in there or by going to
Mind your Midlife on yourpodcast app, which you probably
are in right now, now that Ithink about it, and scrolling
down and finding episode 58 fromback in May of 2024.
And again, it'll be linked inthe show notes.
(04:13):
Let's make it easy.
But yes, we did talk aboutmeditation.
Angela Smith joined me on thatepisode and she kind of blew my
mind because I knew that I wassupposed to meditate and I
didn't do it.
If I'm being honest, I didn'tdo it.
(04:34):
I didn't feel like I had time,I didn't want to sit still, I
feel you if that's what's goingthrough your mind when you think
about meditation, and what sheexplains in that episode is that
it's not just a woo-woo thingthat we need to um our way
through the day.
It's healthy for our brains andI am a brain science nerd.
(05:00):
I was absolutely fascinatedwhen she was talking about that.
So starting to practicemeditation, even if it's five
minutes, starts to teach yourbrain how to refocus, teaches
your nervous system how to calmdown.
(05:20):
So healthy for, just I meanevery part of your body.
I'm not going to revamp thatwhole episode, that wasn't
really the question but it's sohealthy and the goal is not to
start with 20 minutes or 30minutes or an hour of meditation
(05:41):
, because your brain is notgoing to work with you, because
you haven't taught it thisreally important skill of
bringing focus back and calmingdown.
So we start small and I have ananswer for you, because the
question was should I try?
Yes, yes, you should.
(06:03):
Is there an easy way?
I'm going to tell you how Ihave started meditating and see
if this will work for you,because I needed an easy way.
I had all the brain goingeverywhere and busy day and all
of that, so I needed an easy wayas well.
Actually, I have twosuggestions for you.
So start with five minutes.
(06:24):
Number one and I am kind of bestfriends with my timer on my
Apple Watch.
I use the timer all the time.
I use it when I'm cooking orwhen I'm supposed to be doing
something in a few minutes, or Ijust use it all the time.
I put timers on all the time.
Sometimes then, when it goesoff, I can't remember what the
timer was for, but eventually Ido.
So put a timer on for fiveminutes and I do what I call the
(06:54):
legs up against the wallmeditation.
There is a yoga pose called legsup against the wall, and it is
exactly what it sounds like legsup against the wall, and it is
exactly what it sounds like.
You scoot your butt forward,sitting on the ground, until you
get as close to the wall as youcan, and then you are lying
with your back on the floor andyour legs are up against the
(07:16):
wall, so your body's in an LSuper, super, super healthy for
blood flow.
If you have issues like I do,where your feet swell, super
healthy for blood flow.
If you have issues like I do,where your feet swell, getting
those feet above your heart fora little bit of time each day,
really healthy, you can lookthat up as well.
It's a super healthy thing todo and so I do that because I
know I need to and I meditatewhile doing it.
(07:40):
So I'm lying on the floor withmy legs up against a wall or
often up against a chair orwhatever is around me, and I set
my watch for five minutes and Iclose my eyes and I either am
counting to myself one, two, onewith the taking a breath in and
two with taking a breath out,or in out, and the reason you
(08:04):
hear of people doing um orsomething like that is it's good
to give your brain kind of ananchor word to focus on.
So, depending on my mood, Imight be doing in, out with my
breath, or one, two justsilently in my head, and I just
lie there and I do that and Itry to just be calm and empty my
head.
Now, when you try this, youwill not be able to empty your
(08:29):
head for five minutes, unlessyou already are a great
meditator.
You're going to think aboutother things.
Little worries are going tocreep in.
You're going to think aboutwhat you're making for dinner.
You're going to think aboutthat top that you saw online.
It's okay and you'll hearAngela say this if you go back
and listen to that episode.
It's okay.
(08:50):
The power of meditation isknowing how to bring your mind
back, that doing that, bringingyour mind back is possibly the
biggest benefit of meditation.
So it's okay.
If your mind wanders, don't getupset at yourself.
Don't tell yourself that youknow I could never do this.
(09:13):
I knew I couldn't do this.
It's normal, and the act ofcoming back from that is the
best part.
So you realize oh wait, why amI thinking about what I'm making
for dinner?
And you go back and you say one, two with your in and out
breath, deep breaths.
You could add some breath workin while you're at it, sort of
an average to slow pace, andthen, when your timer goes off,
(09:37):
pat yourself on the back.
That's your very first fiveminutes of meditation, and you
can keep going with five minutes, or you could gradually
increase it if it's feeling goodfor you and you're liking it.
That is the way I startedmeditating and it really it's
kind of two birds with one stonefor me, and so I hope you'll
try it.
I want you to tell me again,find me on social, tell me what
(09:59):
did you think?
The second suggestion I have foryou is what Angela called the
five senses meditation, and Ilove this one too.
So right now, where I am in DC,it's hot.
It's like heat warning hot, andso you may be in that same boat
with me, and so I'm be in thatsame boat with me, and so I'm
not walking around outside, if Ican help it, unless it's early
(10:21):
or late.
But if you are going for a walkmaybe you're going for a hike
you can meditate in an activeway as well, and there are so
many brain benefits to this aswell, and so while you're out on
your walk, you can do a littleexercise of recognizing, with
all five senses, what's aroundyou.
(10:43):
So what do you see?
Notice what's around you?
What do you smell?
Are there any smells?
What do you hear?
Notice what the sounds are thatare going on around you?
What are you touching?
Does the air have a feel?
Feel your feet hitting the pathor the sidewalk?
(11:04):
And do you taste anything?
Maybe you're walking by arestaurant?
Is there anything in the air?
Go through all your five sensesand just be observant and just
wonder, and even the practice ofthat, although it doesn't feel
like traditional meditation, isstill good for your brain in the
(11:24):
same way, and you can set atimer for this if you want to.
You know I love my timer andyou can go through and just
notice for five minutes and thencontinue on your walk doing
whatever else you were doing.
That is also a great way to try.
So I hope that answers yourquestion.
I love that question because Ithink it's going to help so many
(11:46):
people because, yes, there isan easy way to start.
Try one of those, try both ofthose, one one day, one the next
day.
See what you like best.
Just do it with like a lightand easy energy.
There's no wrong, there's nobad.
Everything you do related tohelping your brain and body
relax and calm down and focus isgood.
It does help, all right.
(12:08):
Question two how do I rediscoverpurpose and passion after age
50?
Rediscover purpose and passionafter age 50?
This came in on threadsrecently and I actually love
that.
You asked this question becauseLisa Andrea joined me on the
podcast a week ago on episode 38.
(12:29):
So go go head down there andfind it while you're listening
to the podcast if you haven'theard that one.
And she is a transformationcoach, and so what we were
talking about was gettingthrough limiting beliefs, and
what she then talked with meabout for my Patreon members was
how to rediscover your purposeand passion.
(12:51):
Oh, my goodness, there we gothis.
I did not plant this question,I promise.
There we go this.
I did not plant this question,I promise.
So if you haven't heard thatbonus discussion on Mind your
Midlife Pivot on Patreon, go topatreoncom.
Slash mindyourmidlife.
All of the material, all of theinterviews, all of the bonuses
(13:12):
are still accessible in the joinfor free version through the
end of August, so you can catchit Now.
That being said, I've had a fewepisodes recently with people
who focus on helping us tofigure out our second act that
was Shannon Russell, you canfind that one too and at looking
at our lives like a story thatwas Anna Parker and figuring out
(13:38):
what's next in the story andhow does it all connect?
And I have to say, when I thinkabout rediscovering a passion,
I think about something that youlove to do.
So maybe when you're in your50s I'm in my 50s, so I think
we're all in the same boat herewhen you're in your 50s, maybe
you've been doing whatever yourcareer is for a long time and
(14:03):
you know you're not going to bedoing it forever.
Or maybe you hope that andyou're starting to watch your
friends retire and you'restarting to watch your friends
go and do the travel or do thevolunteering, or get involved in
fun things or play pickleballin the middle of the morning or
whatever it is, and you'rethinking, well, how can I do
(14:24):
that?
What fun things would I want todo?
So this might be purpose andpassion in terms of fun aspects
of your post-career life, or itmight be purpose and passion in
terms of I am ready to make achange.
I've got 10 years in my careerleft, or something like that.
What do I want to do?
(14:45):
So there's kind of two piecesto that.
But I want you if I culltogether all the advice that
we've heard recently I want youto think about what you enjoy,
what you are enthusiastic about,when you have a day where
(15:05):
you're like, wow, that was agood day, great things happened.
What were those things?
What types of interactions wereyou having with that work and
with people?
Was it a one-on-one situation?
Was it that you weren't havingto be around people a lot?
Was it a large group of people?
How did the interaction go thatenergized you and that you felt
(15:28):
good about?
What was the action you weretaking?
Was it data analysis?
Was it speaking?
Was it something else?
Find the patterns and thenthink back to when you were
younger and think about what didyou do for fun?
When you were a kid, I actuallyplayed school.
(15:50):
I played school and I playedthis crazy game called plant
doctor that my friend and I madeup.
It's not worth explaining, butanyway I was always diagnosing
and teaching, I guess.
And think about the things thatyou thought were fun.
Now you probably can't go bikearound your neighborhood for a
living.
Now you probably can't go bikearound your neighborhood for a
(16:10):
living, but maybe you need to bemore active in what you're
doing.
Or maybe you have really apassion for fitness.
Maybe there's a thread therethat you can pull, and so how do
you rediscover your purpose andyour passion?
See what those threads are thatlink everything in your story.
(16:31):
See if there's anything thatyou're doing right now, that
there's a piece of that thatyou're excited about.
Can you add more of that?
Can you make a slightadjustment?
This takes time and it takestrial and error, and the trial
and error is what you learn from.
So that will get you startedand I'm super excited about that
(16:51):
.
Make sure you're in Patreon soyou can hear my talk with Lisa
Andrea about this exact thingand I hope that answers your
question.
I know everybody has thatquestion, so thank you for
asking.
All right Now the last one fortoday's Q&A.
Today's Ask Mind your Midlifeis why do you wear green all the
(17:13):
time?
And this question made me laughbecause I do wear a lot of
green.
Now, actually you're not seeingme probably as you are
listening to this, but Iactually don't have green on
today.
I have a pink shirt on.
So it's amusing that I'manswering this question, but I
do wear green a lot and I knowit was kind of meant to be a fun
(17:35):
, silly question and I wasencouraging that and at the same
time.
I think maybe there's a littlesomething we can learn from this
too.
So why do I wear green all thetime?
Because green has been almostmy entire life my favorite color
.
It makes me happy.
It just makes me happy.
As I was thinking about this, Iwas wondering why is that?
(17:57):
And I really think it's becauseso much in nature is green.
I think somehow I have aconnection between leaves on
trees and that sort of thingwith the color green, because I
like that bright, leaf green,kelly green sort of thing with
the color green, cause I likethat bright, like leaf green,
kelly green especially.
(18:18):
And and that's a good thingbecause being outside, being in
nature, forest bathing is a realthing.
It doesn't mean taking a bathin the forest, it just means
being there in the trees, in thenature is healthy.
That's a real thing.
And, interestingly, I love tocombine green with brown.
So there we go, I'm dressingmyself like a tree.
Let me also say we're in midlifeand let's dress how we want to
(18:43):
dress and let's pick the clothesand the colors that make us
happy and let's pick the funglasses or fun sunglasses.
It's time.
Maybe you've been doing thatall along and I applaud you if
that's the case, but a lot of ushaven't been.
We've been, maybe, trying toblend in.
(19:04):
We spend our teenage yearsreally trying to blend in and be
accepted, and that's completelynormal.
There's nothing wrong with that.
It's kind of a part of humandevelopment that we spend a
period of our lives as thecenter of our own worlds, and
that is the case as kids andthen as teens we're still sort
(19:26):
of the center of our own worlds,having trouble seeing other
people's perspectives, and we'restarting to see that we want to
be in their worlds.
So we're trying to fit in.
And that really hit me for sure.
It took me a long time to speakup when I want to stand up for
something.
It took me a long time to learnhow to do that.
So I encourage you at thispoint in midlife dress how you
(19:50):
want to dress, look how you wantto look, pick out the colors in
your house and in your wardrobethat make you happy, period.
And I guess that's what I dowith green.
It makes me happy, and whenpeople say, look, you're wearing
green again, I say yep, I don'tknow if you meant that to be a
negative, but I love it.
So that's the attitude that Iwish for you on anything like
(20:15):
that, and thank you for askingme that question.
I really do love it.
It makes me happy.
I hope that you found this Q&Ainteresting.
I am planning another one.
This is August.
We're going to do another onelate August, early September.
I can't wait to see whatquestions you have for me.
Scroll down in the show notes,click the link that says ask a
(20:36):
question.
You can text me a question or,as I said, find me on social
media.
Cheryl P Fisher.
Dm me a question and I willanswer it on the podcast.
I'm super excited to at leastbe able to connect with you in
this way.
Super excited to at least beable to connect with you in this
way.
So our OMG moment today is myfavorite piece of advice for us
(20:59):
midlife women.
Please be just a little bitmore kind to yourself.
Treat yourself just a littlebit better.
Better, and maybe that'sallowing yourself to have a
little bit more fun, like wewere just talking about.
Maybe it's eating a little bitbetter, having a little bit
(21:20):
healthier habits, maybe it's allthe thoughts.
Be a little bit more kind toyourself.
That's all it takes to have anamazing midlife.
We just need to treat ourselvesa little bit better than we
used to and watch what happens.
Now make sure that you have hitthe follow button, because next
(21:40):
week, speaking of treatingourselves a little bit better, I
have an expert coming to joinus to talk about sleep, one of
the most popular topics, because, goodness, when I sit down with
friends at brunch or wherever,are you talking about sleep?
Because we are, so I will seeyou.
Then she's going to help us outand, in the meantime, slow down
(22:03):
, notice what's going on aroundyou, notice what's going on in
your head, and let's createsomething amazing.
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