Ever feel like you’ve been living on autopilot—checking the boxes, doing what’s expected, and wondering when your turn to thrive actually begins? What if you could step back and see your life as a powerful story—and you as the main character with the pen in hand?
In this empowering episode, Cheryl Fischer sits down with story strategist and coach Anna Rosa Parker to explore how viewing your life as a story can shift everything. From past regrets to future direction, they break down how midlife women can reclaim their voice, rewrite limiting beliefs, and start shaping what comes next—with clarity, confidence, and purpose.
BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU’LL DISCOVER:
✔ Why your past “plot twists” are actually part of your strength
✔ How to identify the limiting beliefs keeping you stuck
✔ A practical framework for reframing your story and moving forward
✔ Why curiosity—not pressure—is the key to reinvention in midlife
🎯 OMG Moment: You are the author of your story. It’s not something you’re given. It’s something you create.
Take Action
Feeling stuck? Ask yourself: What am I curious about? That one question could be the beginning of your next chapter. Start by reflecting on where you’ve been, what you’ve learned—and what story you want to tell from here.
Connect with Anna at annarosaparker.com and on LinkedIn and Instagram.
💛 Join us in Midlife Pivot on Patreon for my extra interview with Anna about competing desires: www.patreon.com/mindyourmidlife.
Why This Episode Matters
Too often, midlife feels like a question mark. But when you start viewing your life through the lens of story, you gain perspective—and power. You realize you’ve already lived chapters filled with grit, growth, and resilience. Now it’s time to decide what happens next.
🎧 Hit follow now and join me next week for a powerful episode on memory—and how we can train our brains to better hold onto the moments that matter.
Find all podcast and coaching resources at cherylpfischer.com.
Text me to ask a question - I'll answer on the podcast!
🌸 Liked this episode? Share it with fellow midlife women over 40 navigating hormone balance, an empty nest, and self-confidence!
🫶 Love this show? Leave a review to help more women over 50 find us.
💡Want support through menopause, mindset shifts, or midlife transitions?
Book a free Mindset Coaching / Intro Call: cherylpfischer.com/coaching, and join us in Midlife Pivot on Patreon.
Let’s talk self-care, self-talk, and owning your next chapter—without the “midlife crisis” narrative.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Cheryl Fischer (00:00):
One of the themes of so many conversations
that I have with clients orfriends or guests on this
podcast is that we want tocreate an amazing life and we
(00:21):
get stuck in figuring out.
What does that mean and wheredo we go next?
And am I just repeating thesame habits?
I've been always repeating whatif I want something different?
And that's such a vague way tosay that at this stage of life,
(00:42):
we want to kind of examine howwe think about our choices, how
we think about what we want andwhat maybe is holding us back,
and so today we're going to talkabout a really empowering way
to think that through.
Stick with me, welcome to Mindyour Midlife, your go-to
(01:04):
resource for confidence andsuccess.
One thought at a time, unlikemost advice out there.
We believe that simply tellingyou to believe in yourself or
change your habits isn't enoughto wake up excited about life or
feel truly confident in yourbody.
Each week you'll gainactionable strategies and oh my
(01:25):
goodness, powerful insights tostop feeling stuck and start
loving your midlife.
This is the Mind your Midlifepodcast.
One of my favorite movies is theHoliday, and it's a Christmas
movie.
There's a house swap and awoman from LA goes to England
(01:49):
and a woman from England goes toLA.
They swap houses.
I don't know if that's a thingin real life.
You can, you can click and sendme a message from the show
notes and tell me have you everhouse swapped?
Is that a thing in real life?
But I really always remember ascene in that movie where the
woman from LA who, excuse mebackwards, the woman from
(02:10):
England who's now in LA ishaving dinner with her older
neighbor and he was involved inthe movie industry back in the
day and they're talking aboutthe fact that she needs to be
the main character in her ownlife.
And she continued in his viewand she, I think, agrees with
(02:32):
him to be the supportingcharacter.
And she says of course you'resupposed to be the main
character in your own life.
And that just always stuck withme as a really interesting way
to think about it.
It doesn't mean all decisionsmade only for our own benefit.
It does mean the movie, if youtake it as a movie, is about our
(02:55):
life.
So putting other charactersfront and center all the time in
every way in that story is alittle bit skewed.
So that led me to find thisweek's guest, Anna Rosa Parker,
because she has such afascinating way of helping her
(03:15):
clients to create theirauthentic stories.
And I'm not talking aboutwriting a biography or writing
your story, but what she does ishelp people to map out the
story of their lives, and you'regoing to hear us talk a lot
(03:36):
about storytelling.
We want you to look back and beable to look forward and be
empowered to do that, and Ithink this conversation is
really going to help you.
Now, anna is a fascinatingperson who has been in theater,
(03:56):
who splits her time between NewYork City and Iceland and really
brings that unique perspective,so I'm thrilled to have Anna
join us.
Okay, so welcome, anna, thankyou.
Thank you for having me.
I'm excited about thisconversation.
(04:18):
So today we're talking aboutour lives as stories, and my
first question, to kind of getus started, is really how did
this perspective help you?
Anna Rosa Parker (04:35):
And how can it help others in general?
Yeah, to use it as a story,right?
Yeah, I mean, I love thatquestion.
I believe that our lives arenarratives, like birth is, as we
know, is the beginning, andthen life, as we call it, is the
middle and then death is theend.
Right, but I believe that weare meant to be the creator and
(04:58):
writer, authors of our own storyand and as our lives.
Story and as our lives, and onceI was able to grasp that, it's
been transformative for me.
It's helped me see that, likeevery chapter, if you will,
whether it's a success orsetback, is a part of a larger
(05:22):
narrative that has shaped who Iam.
For example, when Itransitioned from theater to
luxury marketing, it felt like adetour at first, but looking
back, I was like ah, that was apivotal moment, like a plot
twist that didn't only teach mehow to craft stories in new ways
, it was like a major steppingstone in the trajectory of my
career.
Today and for my clients andothers, I think this perspective
(05:45):
can be you know just aspowering it allows you to step
back.
And when you step back, you seeyour life not just as a series
of random events that you justshowed up at, but like more
meaningful progression, likewhen you realize that you are
the author of your story.
More meaningful progression,like when you realize that you
(06:06):
are the author of your story.
You can rewrite the parts thatno longer serve you and you can
create the future that alignswith your values and your
purpose.
Cheryl Fischer (06:15):
So do you think maybe it helps us sometimes to
not have so many regrets, ithelps us to sort of change that
a bit?
Anna Rosa Parker (06:26):
Yeah, I mean, I believe that these regrets or
those moments, they're here fora reason.
They're here for us to gothrough something that we are
meant to learn better or learnfrom, and sometimes these kind
of moments, similar moments,repeat themselves.
So that's obviously somethingthat we should be looking into
(06:46):
and, just like the idea of likeunearthing and like defining
your narrative, you can use thatas a compass to guide you and
into your next steps goingforward.
And, yeah, looking back andthink of it as mistakes.
I think it's.
It doesn't have to be like that.
I think it's.
It doesn't have to be like that.
I think having it as a, as alearning sort of a trajectory is
(07:09):
.
I think it's much more sort ofmindful and more fun to look at
it that way.
Cheryl Fischer (07:14):
Yeah, I love the idea that a pivot then is kind
of a plot twist and it takes uson this new adventure and that's
kind of how I look at my careeris a plot twist.
Here we go New adventure a fewtimes, yeah, yeah, that makes it
exciting, right, it really doesOnto a new adventure, yeah, and
so does it then help as well todoes this.
(07:39):
Thinking of this as a story inthis way does it help us to
figure out where we're going?
Also, does it help us to lookforward where we're going.
Also, does it help us to lookforward.
Anna Rosa Parker (07:47):
Yeah, that's the thing and the reason I
created the framework.
It's called evoke, like toevoke your identity, and it's
also an acronym.
But the reason I created it wasbecause I wanted to connect the
dots going forward.
I was kind of getting tired oflooking back and say, oh, that
(08:10):
makes sense now, but in it I waslike, why am I here?
What am I doing?
Where should I go next?
So, but if you craft it fromthere, like the roots, like
you're the earth, like where youcame from and then where you
believe you want to go, and theneverything in between it sort
of gives you completion.
Cheryl Fischer (08:24):
It's like you are in charge too, you know yeah
, I, when we first met, thisreally fascinated me because I
was looking back and thinkingyou know, I worked in corporate
and then I was a teacher andthen I had a business and a
trainer.
And yet when I know where I amnow as a coach and podcaster,
(08:46):
all of that makes sense, like I.
Now I see, okay, I took thisskill from this and I took that
experience from this and it'spowerful that I did this.
But I don't think I had thoughtabout it that way that it all
goes together.
Anna Rosa Parker (09:00):
Yeah, I know it's so much more powerful and
beautiful and it just I don'tknow.
I have this thing that I reallyhad to sort of a heal, because
I'm from Iceland and I live inNew York.
My family is very, you know,sort of a blended, and I was
always trying to heal this sortof I don't want to be like two
people, you know what I mean.
(09:20):
You know what I mean.
So it used to be this way, likeif I Googled myself like oh,
there's the theater actress andthen there's the marketing coach
person, and then I was able tosort of amend it.
If you will like, make it bepart of the whole one story.
You know trajectory.
Cheryl Fischer (09:36):
Right right, that's really fascinating
because I tend to agree with youthat we end up in places that
make sense if we sort of look atthe picture even bigger.
Anna Rosa Parker (09:47):
So yeah, and I find that very healing and you
know what it is.
It's always going back intolike who you are at the core,
like your authenticity.
I think that's very healing andthat also gives you that, this
power that you are the author ofyour life.
Cheryl Fischer (10:02):
Yeah, that's a great point, that's great, and
I'm like feeling that now, asI'm thinking about this, that's
amazing.
Anna Rosa Parker (10:08):
That makes me so happy.
I get goosebumps when peoplehave like these kind of aha
moments or clarity.
Cheryl Fischer (10:14):
Yeah, for sure, Okay.
So tell us more about thisframework that you created.
Anna Rosa Parker (10:20):
Yeah, so it is the idea of taking your
narrative and using that as acompass.
And in order to do that, wemust be aware of what our story
is, which is usually not thecase with people they're unaware
of, because we sort of justshow up in life and things just
kind of happen to us, if youwill.
(10:40):
But when we start to create itthrough this framework.
So basically, just in short,and I'll just say like kind of
the highlights of it, it's muchdeeper than this, but I'll go so
evoke, spelling out earthvalues, objective knowledge and
essence.
I take each category and wejust sort of go through it.
(11:01):
For example, the earth.
That's like your roots, wheredid you come from?
Like how, what was happeningwhen you were born?
What role did you play in yourchildhood?
You know, how do you feel aboutyour birthplace?
All these things really matterto us.
And to reframe it and to look atit where we came from, it's
very powerful, because a lot ofus have shame.
(11:21):
We walk with shame forsomething we might be unaware of
, that we have shame, somethingabout where we came from.
But reframing it gives you thissort of a power and goes
further into authenticity,especially when you're talking
about knowledge, because a lotof people have untraditional
knowledge, not something theystudied, but something whether
(11:42):
it's superpower you were bornwith or something you just are
curious about and you start tolearn it and these are often
very valuable in the workplacethat are not just like the job
description, not just like thejob description.
So, going through all theselittle nooks and areas of our
lives, it allows us to reframe.
(12:02):
And in this, when we're lookingat our going through our memory
, our memory is not always atruth teller, because a lot of
our memories are sort of a madeup of some like little glimpses
of moments that might not evenbe accurate, or we translate it
in a certain way, like something.
Let's say, if a teacher gave youa constructive criticism, you
(12:24):
felt hurt and so then that'sthat, that hurt is in your story
.
But we can go back and look atit and just reframe it.
Oh, they really wanted me to.
For example, um, I was ingymnastics and I was moved out
of my group into a much moreadvanced group and one of the
people in that group becausethese people were like 16 and
(12:46):
they were like at the last yearin their gymnastics and I was 12
and I had no business beingthere until one person said you
know what, you don't reallybelong here, you need to go back
to your group.
And to me it was.
It was such a rejection, it wasawful Until, like I think,
recently I brought this story upand I was like, come on, really
I've been carrying this allalong, you know, yeah, in my
(13:08):
rejection, you know littlecloset.
Cheryl Fischer (13:11):
Yeah, it's such a good point Because also,
depending on our perspective ofthe situation, we might
interpret something in a waythat it wasn't even meant.
And I know I've talked with somany people in coaching where
they'll say, well, you know, myparent or whatever, always said
(13:34):
this about me or thought Icouldn't do whatever, always
said this about me or thought Icouldn't do whatever.
And then we have to ask likereally, are you sure?
Anna Rosa Parker (13:46):
Because maybe that's not really what they
meant and we just do thisinterpretation of it.
Absolutely, absolutely, we do,and we we drop with this things,
these memories and thoughts,and repeat them every, every day
.
So that's another thing in theframework.
We stop repeating the samethoughts and actions and
feelings because we're able toreconstruct.
We can use the past tounderstand now, and then you use
(14:06):
all that to create and writeyour future.
Cheryl Fischer (14:09):
So if some particular part of our story or
part of this framework is reallykind of standing out to us as
we think back and go through it,what does that mean?
Does that tell us something?
Anna Rosa Parker (14:24):
Yeah, that depends what it means by
standing out.
You know it can, it can holdlike some profound, like
insights.
So if you are meaning, meaning,for example, I would say two
ways to stand out, right, whatneeds work and then what can be
celebrated.
So the parts of our story thatstand out, um and have are
(14:47):
revealing some um, reoccurringanxiety or or pain.
Uh, it's often like somethingunresolved.
So if you keep revisitingmoments that trigger, it's
probably some dust left in thosecorners and we need to clean
and polish and look at that.
And then also, what stands outwe might not always be aware
(15:10):
something that we have overcomeor accomplished because we're so
mean to ourselves that thosepositive moments, they, they
should be up in all this andcelebrated.
But we don't always do that.
We just sort of skim over mystand out, but it's not like I
did that, you know.
Yes, we're so bad aboutcelebrating, especially as women
(15:32):
.
You know, we just, we just go,we just do right, yes, yes.
Cheryl Fischer (15:38):
And I want to pause on that for a moment,
because I could not possiblyagree with you more.
And it still hits me, eventhough I know this and I tell
people this as well.
I was doing a post recently onsocial media about the podcast
and it had risen in the rankingsand I was excited.
And as I was about to hit thebutton on this post, then I
(16:00):
thought to myself I don't knowif I should put this like is it
bragging?
You know, maybe I shouldn't putit.
And then I was like no, hit thebutton, Come on, but it's still
, it's the same thing.
Anna Rosa Parker (16:14):
It's the same thing.
We're not allowing ourselves tocelebrate.
But you know, who said thatlife was supposed to be hard?
I mean, a lot of people say it,but it doesn't have to be, as
in celebration makes it kind ofcancels out almost certain.
You know, challenges in a way,if we just like really really
honor them.
Yeah, of course we havechallenges and it's not easy.
(16:38):
But what I'm saying, we lean somuch into the hardship versus
what we actually accomplish andwho we are as human beings.
Such a good point.
Cheryl Fischer (16:49):
I also think one thing that a lot of us fall
victim to and I'm curious yourperspective on this is just kind
of I would call it coastingthrough life and just sort of
letting things happen to us andnot really paying attention, and
one day is the same as the nextday.
The next day I read a book once.
I can't remember what the bookwas, but they said basically
(17:09):
we're walking through life kindof hypnotized just same same,
same, same same same.
And I'm wondering if maybe kindof thinking in this way is
going to help with that.
Absolutely.
Anna Rosa Parker (17:22):
Yeah, I so agree.
I like how you said it castingthrough life, Is that what?
Cheryl Fischer (17:25):
you said Coasting.
Anna Rosa Parker (17:27):
I mean coasting, yeah, coasting through
life.
So interesting.
Yeah, that's what I mean, whenpeople just sort of find, you
know, series of events just sortof happen to them.
Yeah, so, going back into orgoing in taking place and seat
at the table of your own storyis how we can pivot to our own
(17:51):
authority to be really mindfuland like awake as we decide what
we are doing and because, like,it all repeats itself if we
don't make anything new orchange, and our thoughts repeat
themselves, our feelings do, andtherefore action.
So we have to start.
(18:11):
You know we're shaking out theegg, but I believe that just
sitting down and, even if you'renot working with me or my
framework, but really start toanswer yourself, ask yourself
some questions about why you'redoing what you're doing, what
you, what you actually reallylove, and and then going into
those limiting beliefs thatcreate that stuckness.
And then, yeah, there arelimiting beliefs and then
(18:35):
they're also competing desires.
That also gives, like you know,keeps us stuck when we are.
You know, for example, if I'mworking with a client who really
wants to go all in and be atheater performer, but they
don't like to travel, so thenthat's a competing desire.
Yes, it sure is, yeah,interesting.
(18:56):
You know, we're not alwaysaware of those and so, therefore
, like you said, just coastingand just things are, you know,
happening to us.
But really going back into the,the, the author seat of your
life is, it's just, it's so, itchanges so much and and allowing
ourselves, allowing ourselvesto be ourselves I say this, I
(19:18):
speak at NYU, here in New York,to young people to encourage
them to really dive into notjust who they are, but to be
more of that what they are,because there's so much sameness
and young people they find ithard to make choices because
they think they have to show upas certain idea you know that's
(19:40):
a great point and it's a littlescary maybe to.
Cheryl Fischer (19:44):
I like how you said be more of who you are.
I really like that and I alsoget that in your 20s as well as
really any stage that could bescary, because now maybe people
look at you differently.
Right Now maybe you have tokind of have a bit more strength
and stand up for what youreally want to be.
Anna Rosa Parker (20:03):
Yeah, I think, just having authority for your
decision making.
And there's one thing that Ialso when I work with people, I
really encourage them to be makedecisions when they're in that
parasympathetic nervous system,not in the stress mode, because
that changes our decision makingdrastically.
Cheryl Fischer (20:27):
Huge good point.
Yes, yes.
And before I really knewanything about mindset and
nervous system and all of all ofwhat we know is so powerful,
before I knew any of that, afriend years ago said to me
you're not going to be able toget a good idea about something
I was struggling with unless youcalm down.
And she said just go in a quietroom and close your eyes and
(20:52):
just slowly count to 20 and justcalm yourself and then just see
what happens.
And that's what she wasadvising is to get into the
parasympathetic nervous systemand you never know what could
happen.
And yeah, I didn't have thewords for it yet.
But, yes, it's powerful.
Anna Rosa Parker (21:09):
And, yeah, even if we didn't have the words
for it, but we subconsciouslyknew that we shouldn't be making
, you know, decisions in a hastyand hastiness.
But it's very powerful too,because that only helps you go
more in and into your ownintelligence, intuition.
You know what, what you call it, it to to make this decision
(21:33):
and it's more authentic.
It's more, uh, original, likeeverything we do out of our own,
from ourselves.
It's just so much moreinteresting yeah, okay.
Cheryl Fischer (21:43):
So let me ask you this have you worked with a
client who has been in her 40sor 50s and really kind of
impacted by a lot of the midlifechange that happens?
Yeah, yeah, can you tell uslike a little bit of that?
Anna Rosa Parker (21:58):
Yeah, the stuckness.
I know it's a buzzword, but itreally is.
I think I saw somewhere that70% of people after it's 40
they're going to be stuck atsome point in their life, like
in that era.
And this is when we start toask some questions about what
are we doing?
(22:19):
Why are we doing it like, wheredo I want to go next?
This stuckness sort of takesover and you know, like my
husband's midlife he just wentout and bought a motorcycle and
checked off the bucket list.
Once he went down and broke ashoulder, oh no, but you know
what I mean.
Like women, we have it a littlebit differently.
Not that he isn't mindful, hevery much is.
(22:40):
But when women have this sortof a stuckness, it's really
beautiful to work with peopleand see them open up to this
idea of being themselves andgoing back into because they
might be.
You know, when we are midlifewe've kind of been serving
(23:03):
serving, maybe, children orfamily members, taking care of
others, and it doesn't alwaysinvite us to sit down and like,
oh, I'm really gonna start towrite my own life here, right,
but one, once that stuckness issort of a taken over and I start
working with people, we reallyjust go into your whole
(23:23):
trajectory, where you came fromand where you want to go and why
, and there's just so much like,there's so much eye opening in
that sitting, sitting with themand seeing where and how things
really start to make sense.
Then there is that looking backand making sense of things, and
so we take that and now we canmake decisions going forward.
(23:44):
And I wouldn't tell somebody toquit their attorney job to
become a comedian overnight orsomething like that, but we can
really start to make somechanges towards what we actually
want and what is fulfillingwhat we believe is our purpose,
and a lot of people don't knowwhat their purpose is, and I
(24:04):
okay.
So if you don't know what yourpurpose is and you don't know
what you want to do, lean intoyour curiosity.
What are you curious about?
That's what I always do withwith clients, because we
underestimate curiosity.
We lean so much into thepurpose and the passion, but
there's no way I can bepassionate every day.
I'm not.
I am curious every day, thoughI'm always curious and that
(24:29):
there's so many answers thanthat, like what are you curious
about?
Dive into that, and that mighthelp you become unstuck, because
you will start to dig into whatthat is which, if I were to say
it in the most simple way, justmeans slowing down and paying
(24:54):
attention?
Cheryl Fischer (24:54):
Yeah, absolutely so.
Curiosity kind of forces us todo that, doesn't it?
Maybe I need to recognizewhat's going on around me,
recognize what's going on insideof me, wonder about it.
Yeah, I like that concept a lot.
Anna Rosa Parker (25:08):
Yeah, yeah, I think it's very powerful and
we've spent so much.
I think people have spent a lotof time being disappointed that
they don't understand.
They don't know what theirpurpose is, they don't know what
they're calling or the passionis, but they're going to find
something they're curious about.
For sure.
I think everybody is.
Cheryl Fischer (25:27):
Yeah, yeah, and maybe it turns into a whole new
career and a whole new thing, ormaybe it doesn't, but it turns
into something that we love todo and maybe that's great.
Anna Rosa Parker (25:37):
Yeah, but often does I mean how did you
become a coach?
You were curious about you wereworking on yourself, or right?
Cheryl Fischer (25:45):
Yes, that's exactly my story.
Excellent point.
Okay, if you're listening rightnow, anna just nailed me.
Yes, exactly what happened.
And in fact, funnily enough,years ago I used to say all that
personal development stuff, no,no, no, like I just need to do
(26:06):
the work, that's all just what.
I don't know what I said, butyou know, it's all just silly.
And here I am years later,having gotten curious about it.
And here I am years later,having gotten curious about it
and starting to learn, and then,you know, creating an entire
business out of that.
So beautiful.
Anna Rosa Parker (26:18):
Yeah, congratulations, thank you, you
did that.
Cheryl Fischer (26:22):
You did that on your own, true, and it's.
You know, it's not withoutbumps sometimes, but maybe that
makes it more interesting.
Anna Rosa Parker (26:29):
Yeah, yeah, you know, and that's like you
were asking earlier whensomething stands out in the
story, that can be those bumpstoo, and they're often there to
something we want to polish alittle further, you know, and
also making us make slight leftor slight right, and also
certain learnings.
They just take a few times overand over.
(26:52):
We might get hit by the samething.
It's like we can also betoddlers in a way.
Cheryl Fischer (27:00):
They will stop running down the stairs after
they fall a few times, that's agood point and maybe, going
through this sort ofstorytelling format, we start to
recognize that oh, I am makingthe same mistakes a few times.
Anna Rosa Parker (27:16):
Yeah, absolutely, and that's that's.
It's so eye opening andpowerful and again like just
very, very healing when you canreframe your story and and and
really get the chance todissolve some of the limiting
beliefs and see like, wow, thishas been holding me back for a
(27:36):
while.
And I also back to that clientand you know, midlife or in
stuckness it is often that weare living that story, that our
parents wrote it for us, or, youknow, we're carrying so much BS
in our heads too that we'vecertainly just like gotten lost
in that story, even if we wantedto be mindful of the decisions
(27:59):
we're making.
But the reframe is a lot ofpower, like a personal power in
that.
Cheryl Fischer (28:06):
I love that.
Yeah, so true Things that wedon't even realize that we're
carrying.
Anna Rosa Parker (28:12):
that is how we think it should be still kind
of rattling around in there,yeah, yeah so then, and then,
once you have that, you giveyourself that you know, okay,
I'm telling my own story, I'mbuilding my own life, so you
move forward and it's less aboutfear.
Uh, it's more about embracingpossibilities and start to
(28:32):
celebrate yourself a little bitmore and having fun.
Cheryl Fischer (28:35):
This should be fun uh, yes, right, yes, yes,
and you know what I like thatperspective, because on so many
episodes of this podcast, we'retalking about something that is
a challenge at this phase oflife.
And okay, how will we thinkabout that and how will we go
(28:56):
about that, but overall it canbe fun.
Anna Rosa Parker (29:01):
It can be fun and it is.
It is all challenging, but Ifind like once we're able to
remove some of the fear andreally work through anxiety, it
really we start to become justlighter and see possibilities
versus just problems andchallenges and roadblocks.
I love it.
Cheryl Fischer (29:20):
Okay, so I have to always be mindful of the time
, because we could talk forever.
Yeah, exactly, I love this.
Okay, so, if somebody is reallyresonating with this and
thinking you know this, thisidea of of reframing and
storytelling my life could maybehelp me.
(29:41):
How can people find you orlearn more about what you do?
Anna Rosa Parker (29:46):
Yeah, thank you for asking that.
They can go on my website.
Start there.
It's under my full name,annarosaparker.
com, and they can send me amessage through that.
Also, I'm on LinkedIn under myfull name, Anna Rosa Parker, and
then I have an Instagram thatis currently assigned to my
evoke method, like the frameworkthat I'm just trying out.
Cheryl Fischer (30:07):
Yeah, perfect, and I'll put those in the show
notes too, so that we'll make itreally easy.
Yeah, perfect, and I'll putthose in the show notes too, so
that will make it really easy.
Let's, let's wrap up with this.
I always love to to kind of say, okay, if you don't remember
every single thing that youheard just now, because you're,
you know, folding the laundry ordriving the car or whatever,
while you're listening, what isthe one big OMG, I have to
(30:30):
remember this thing that youwant somebody listening to think
about.
Oh, I love this.
Anna Rosa Parker (30:37):
Okay, I think, then, the most important
takeaway is that you are theauthor of your story.
So, no matter where you are inlife or how stuck you feel that
every day is an opportunity towrite something new and to
understand where you arecurrently in your story today,
(30:57):
where you came from and whereyou are going in your story.
So, for example, like today,job is no longer something that
we just get, it's something wecreate, and same with our life
story.
Cheryl Fischer (31:10):
Oh, I like that.
It's not something we get, it'ssomething we create Interesting
.
Anna Rosa Parker (31:14):
Yeah, yeah, and so is our lives, our story,
our journey, and you know, wecan just start writing it.
Cheryl Fischer (31:22):
Yes, it's empowering.
Anna Rosa Parker (31:24):
Yeah, thank you so much for having me.
I appreciate you.
Cheryl Fischer (31:29):
Be the author of your own life.
As I was having thisconversation with Anna, I almost
feel like I was sitting upstraighter.
I was feeling, feeling trulyfeeling more empowered.
There is something about theidea that we get to write our
(31:50):
own stories that is powerful andimpactful, and so I hope this
episode has been that for you.
Now make sure to grab the linkin the show notes and head over
to my Midlife Patreon community,because I have an extra mini
(32:13):
interview with Anna that is overin Patreon for those Patreon
members, where we talked a bitfurther about midlife and about
those competing desires and eventouched on relationships, which
is really interesting.
So I'll see you over there forsure.
And make sure you've hit thefollow button, because next week
(32:35):
I'm going to share with yousome of the work I've done to
try to figure out how in theworld can I improve my memory?
And doesn't it follow rightalong with this storytelling
idea?
Because maybe now you'rescratching your head and
thinking I need to remember morethings from my life, so let's
(32:56):
talk about it.
I'll see you then, and in themeantime, oh my goodness, let's
keep creating confidence andsuccess, one thought at a time.
One of the themes of so many conversations
that I have with clients orfriends or guests on this
podcast is that we want tocreate an amazing life and we
(00:21):
get stuck in figuring out.
What does that mean and wheredo we go next?
And am I just repeating thesame habits?
I've been always repeating whatif I want something different?
And that's such a vague way tosay that at this stage of life,
(00:42):
we want to kind of examine howwe think about our choices, how
we think about what we want andwhat maybe is holding us back,
and so today we're going to talkabout a really empowering way
to think that through.
Stick with me, welcome to Mindyour Midlife, your go-to
(01:04):
resource for confidence andsuccess.
One thought at a time, unlikemost advice out there.
We believe that simply tellingyou to believe in yourself or
change your habits isn't enoughto wake up excited about life or
feel truly confident in yourbody.
Each week you'll gainactionable strategies and oh my
(01:25):
goodness, powerful insights tostop feeling stuck and start
loving your midlife.
This is the Mind your Midlifepodcast.
One of my favorite movies is theHoliday, and it's a Christmas
movie.
There's a house swap and awoman from LA goes to England
(01:49):
and a woman from England goes toLA.
They swap houses.
I don't know if that's a thingin real life.
You can, you can click and sendme a message from the show
notes and tell me have you everhouse swapped?
Is that a thing in real life?
But I really always remember ascene in that movie where the
woman from LA who, excuse mebackwards, the woman from
(02:10):
England who's now in LA ishaving dinner with her older
neighbor and he was involved inthe movie industry back in the
day and they're talking aboutthe fact that she needs to be
the main character in her ownlife.
And she continued in his viewand she, I think, agrees with
(02:32):
him to be the supportingcharacter.
And she says of course you'resupposed to be the main
character in your own life.
And that just always stuck withme as a really interesting way
to think about it.
It doesn't mean all decisionsmade only for our own benefit.
It does mean the movie, if youtake it as a movie, is about our
(02:55):
life.
So putting other charactersfront and center all the time in
every way in that story is alittle bit skewed.
So that led me to find thisweek's guest, Anna Rosa Parker,
because she has such afascinating way of helping her
(03:15):
clients to create theirauthentic stories.
And I'm not talking aboutwriting a biography or writing
your story, but what she does ishelp people to map out the
story of their lives, and you'regoing to hear us talk a lot
(03:36):
about storytelling.
We want you to look back and beable to look forward and be
empowered to do that, and Ithink this conversation is
really going to help you.
Now, anna is a fascinatingperson who has been in theater,
(03:56):
who splits her time between NewYork City and Iceland and really
brings that unique perspective,so I'm thrilled to have Anna
join us.
Okay, so welcome, anna, thankyou.
Thank you for having me.
I'm excited about thisconversation.
(04:18):
So today we're talking aboutour lives as stories, and my
first question, to kind of getus started, is really how did
this perspective help you?
Anna Rosa Parker (04:35):
And how can it help others in general?
Yeah, to use it as a story,right?
Yeah, I mean, I love thatquestion.
I believe that our lives arenarratives, like birth is, as we
know, is the beginning, andthen life, as we call it, is the
middle and then death is theend.
Right, but I believe that weare meant to be the creator and
(04:58):
writer, authors of our own storyand and as our lives.
Story and as our lives, and onceI was able to grasp that, it's
been transformative for me.
It's helped me see that, likeevery chapter, if you will,
whether it's a success orsetback, is a part of a larger
(05:22):
narrative that has shaped who Iam.
For example, when Itransitioned from theater to
luxury marketing, it felt like adetour at first, but looking
back, I was like ah, that was apivotal moment, like a plot
twist that didn't only teach mehow to craft stories in new ways
, it was like a major steppingstone in the trajectory of my
career.
Today and for my clients andothers, I think this perspective
(05:45):
can be you know just aspowering it allows you to step
back.
And when you step back, you seeyour life not just as a series
of random events that you justshowed up at, but like more
meaningful progression, likewhen you realize that you are
the author of your story.
More meaningful progression,like when you realize that you
(06:06):
are the author of your story.
You can rewrite the parts thatno longer serve you and you can
create the future that alignswith your values and your
purpose.
Cheryl Fischer (06:15):
So do you think maybe it helps us sometimes to
not have so many regrets, ithelps us to sort of change that
a bit?
Anna Rosa Parker (06:26):
Yeah, I mean, I believe that these regrets or
those moments, they're here fora reason.
They're here for us to gothrough something that we are
meant to learn better or learnfrom, and sometimes these kind
of moments, similar moments,repeat themselves.
So that's obviously somethingthat we should be looking into
(06:46):
and, just like the idea of likeunearthing and like defining
your narrative, you can use thatas a compass to guide you and
into your next steps goingforward.
And, yeah, looking back andthink of it as mistakes.
I think it's.
It doesn't have to be like that.
I think it's.
It doesn't have to be like that.
I think having it as a, as alearning sort of a trajectory is
(07:09):
.
I think it's much more sort ofmindful and more fun to look at
it that way.
Cheryl Fischer (07:14):
Yeah, I love the idea that a pivot then is kind
of a plot twist and it takes uson this new adventure and that's
kind of how I look at my careeris a plot twist.
Here we go New adventure a fewtimes, yeah, yeah, that makes it
exciting, right, it really doesOnto a new adventure, yeah, and
so does it then help as well todoes this.
(07:39):
Thinking of this as a story inthis way does it help us to
figure out where we're going?
Also, does it help us to lookforward where we're going.
Also, does it help us to lookforward.
Anna Rosa Parker (07:47):
Yeah, that's the thing and the reason I
created the framework.
It's called evoke, like toevoke your identity, and it's
also an acronym.
But the reason I created it wasbecause I wanted to connect the
dots going forward.
I was kind of getting tired oflooking back and say, oh, that
(08:10):
makes sense now, but in it I waslike, why am I here?
What am I doing?
Where should I go next?
So, but if you craft it fromthere, like the roots, like
you're the earth, like where youcame from and then where you
believe you want to go, and theneverything in between it sort
of gives you completion.
Cheryl Fischer (08:24):
It's like you are in charge too, you know yeah
, I, when we first met, thisreally fascinated me because I
was looking back and thinkingyou know, I worked in corporate
and then I was a teacher andthen I had a business and a
trainer.
And yet when I know where I amnow as a coach and podcaster,
(08:46):
all of that makes sense, like I.
Now I see, okay, I took thisskill from this and I took that
experience from this and it'spowerful that I did this.
But I don't think I had thoughtabout it that way that it all
goes together.
Anna Rosa Parker (09:00):
Yeah, I know it's so much more powerful and
beautiful and it just I don'tknow.
I have this thing that I reallyhad to sort of a heal, because
I'm from Iceland and I live inNew York.
My family is very, you know,sort of a blended, and I was
always trying to heal this sortof I don't want to be like two
people, you know what I mean.
(09:20):
You know what I mean.
So it used to be this way, likeif I Googled myself like oh,
there's the theater actress andthen there's the marketing coach
person, and then I was able tosort of amend it.
If you will like, make it bepart of the whole one story.
You know trajectory.
Cheryl Fischer (09:36):
Right right, that's really fascinating
because I tend to agree with youthat we end up in places that
make sense if we sort of look atthe picture even bigger.
Anna Rosa Parker (09:47):
So yeah, and I find that very healing and you
know what it is.
It's always going back intolike who you are at the core,
like your authenticity.
I think that's very healing andthat also gives you that, this
power that you are the author ofyour life.
Cheryl Fischer (10:02):
Yeah, that's a great point, that's great, and
I'm like feeling that now, asI'm thinking about this, that's
amazing.
Anna Rosa Parker (10:08):
That makes me so happy.
I get goosebumps when peoplehave like these kind of aha
moments or clarity.
Cheryl Fischer (10:14):
Yeah, for sure, Okay.
So tell us more about thisframework that you created.
Anna Rosa Parker (10:20):
Yeah, so it is the idea of taking your
narrative and using that as acompass.
And in order to do that, wemust be aware of what our story
is, which is usually not thecase with people they're unaware
of, because we sort of justshow up in life and things just
kind of happen to us, if youwill.
(10:40):
But when we start to create itthrough this framework.
So basically, just in short,and I'll just say like kind of
the highlights of it, it's muchdeeper than this, but I'll go so
evoke, spelling out earthvalues, objective knowledge and
essence.
I take each category and wejust sort of go through it.
(11:01):
For example, the earth.
That's like your roots, wheredid you come from?
Like how, what was happeningwhen you were born?
What role did you play in yourchildhood?
You know, how do you feel aboutyour birthplace?
All these things really matterto us.
And to reframe it and to look atit where we came from, it's
very powerful, because a lot ofus have shame.
(11:21):
We walk with shame forsomething we might be unaware of
, that we have shame, somethingabout where we came from.
But reframing it gives you thissort of a power and goes
further into authenticity,especially when you're talking
about knowledge, because a lotof people have untraditional
knowledge, not something theystudied, but something whether
(11:42):
it's superpower you were bornwith or something you just are
curious about and you start tolearn it and these are often
very valuable in the workplacethat are not just like the job
description, not just like thejob description.
So, going through all theselittle nooks and areas of our
lives, it allows us to reframe.
(12:02):
And in this, when we're lookingat our going through our memory
, our memory is not always atruth teller, because a lot of
our memories are sort of a madeup of some like little glimpses
of moments that might not evenbe accurate, or we translate it
in a certain way, like something.
Let's say, if a teacher gave youa constructive criticism, you
(12:24):
felt hurt and so then that'sthat, that hurt is in your story
.
But we can go back and look atit and just reframe it.
Oh, they really wanted me to.
For example, um, I was ingymnastics and I was moved out
of my group into a much moreadvanced group and one of the
people in that group becausethese people were like 16 and
(12:46):
they were like at the last yearin their gymnastics and I was 12
and I had no business beingthere until one person said you
know what, you don't reallybelong here, you need to go back
to your group.
And to me it was.
It was such a rejection, it wasawful Until, like I think,
recently I brought this story upand I was like, come on, really
I've been carrying this allalong, you know, yeah, in my
(13:08):
rejection, you know littlecloset.
Cheryl Fischer (13:11):
Yeah, it's such a good point Because also,
depending on our perspective ofthe situation, we might
interpret something in a waythat it wasn't even meant.
And I know I've talked with somany people in coaching where
they'll say, well, you know, myparent or whatever, always said
(13:34):
this about me or thought Icouldn't do whatever, always
said this about me or thought Icouldn't do whatever.
And then we have to ask likereally, are you sure?
Anna Rosa Parker (13:46):
Because maybe that's not really what they
meant and we just do thisinterpretation of it.
Absolutely, absolutely, we do,and we we drop with this things,
these memories and thoughts,and repeat them every, every day
.
So that's another thing in theframework.
We stop repeating the samethoughts and actions and
feelings because we're able toreconstruct.
We can use the past tounderstand now, and then you use
(14:06):
all that to create and writeyour future.
Cheryl Fischer (14:09):
So if some particular part of our story or
part of this framework is reallykind of standing out to us as
we think back and go through it,what does that mean?
Does that tell us something?
Anna Rosa Parker (14:24):
Yeah, that depends what it means by
standing out.
You know it can, it can holdlike some profound, like
insights.
So if you are meaning, meaning,for example, I would say two
ways to stand out, right, whatneeds work and then what can be
celebrated.
So the parts of our story thatstand out, um and have are
(14:47):
revealing some um, reoccurringanxiety or or pain.
Uh, it's often like somethingunresolved.
So if you keep revisitingmoments that trigger, it's
probably some dust left in thosecorners and we need to clean
and polish and look at that.
And then also, what stands outwe might not always be aware
(15:10):
something that we have overcomeor accomplished because we're so
mean to ourselves that thosepositive moments, they, they
should be up in all this andcelebrated.
But we don't always do that.
We just sort of skim over mystand out, but it's not like I
did that, you know.
Yes, we're so bad aboutcelebrating, especially as women
(15:32):
.
You know, we just, we just go,we just do right, yes, yes.
Cheryl Fischer (15:38):
And I want to pause on that for a moment,
because I could not possiblyagree with you more.
And it still hits me, eventhough I know this and I tell
people this as well.
I was doing a post recently onsocial media about the podcast
and it had risen in the rankingsand I was excited.
And as I was about to hit thebutton on this post, then I
(16:00):
thought to myself I don't knowif I should put this like is it
bragging?
You know, maybe I shouldn't putit.
And then I was like no, hit thebutton, Come on, but it's still
, it's the same thing.
Anna Rosa Parker (16:14):
It's the same thing.
We're not allowing ourselves tocelebrate.
But you know, who said thatlife was supposed to be hard?
I mean, a lot of people say it,but it doesn't have to be, as
in celebration makes it kind ofcancels out almost certain.
You know, challenges in a way,if we just like really really
honor them.
Yeah, of course we havechallenges and it's not easy.
(16:38):
But what I'm saying, we lean somuch into the hardship versus
what we actually accomplish andwho we are as human beings.
Such a good point.
Cheryl Fischer (16:49):
I also think one thing that a lot of us fall
victim to and I'm curious yourperspective on this is just kind
of I would call it coastingthrough life and just sort of
letting things happen to us andnot really paying attention, and
one day is the same as the nextday.
The next day I read a book once.
I can't remember what the bookwas, but they said basically
(17:09):
we're walking through life kindof hypnotized just same same,
same, same same same.
And I'm wondering if maybe kindof thinking in this way is
going to help with that.
Absolutely.
Anna Rosa Parker (17:22):
Yeah, I so agree.
I like how you said it castingthrough life, Is that what?
Cheryl Fischer (17:25):
you said Coasting.
Anna Rosa Parker (17:27):
I mean coasting, yeah, coasting through
life.
So interesting.
Yeah, that's what I mean, whenpeople just sort of find, you
know, series of events just sortof happen to them.
Yeah, so, going back into orgoing in taking place and seat
at the table of your own storyis how we can pivot to our own
(17:51):
authority to be really mindfuland like awake as we decide what
we are doing and because, like,it all repeats itself if we
don't make anything new orchange, and our thoughts repeat
themselves, our feelings do, andtherefore action.
So we have to start.
(18:11):
You know we're shaking out theegg, but I believe that just
sitting down and, even if you'renot working with me or my
framework, but really start toanswer yourself, ask yourself
some questions about why you'redoing what you're doing, what
you, what you actually reallylove, and and then going into
those limiting beliefs thatcreate that stuckness.
And then, yeah, there arelimiting beliefs and then
(18:35):
they're also competing desires.
That also gives, like you know,keeps us stuck when we are.
You know, for example, if I'mworking with a client who really
wants to go all in and be atheater performer, but they
don't like to travel, so thenthat's a competing desire.
Yes, it sure is, yeah,interesting.
(18:56):
You know, we're not alwaysaware of those and so, therefore
, like you said, just coastingand just things are, you know,
happening to us.
But really going back into the,the, the author seat of your
life is, it's just, it's so, itchanges so much and and allowing
ourselves, allowing ourselvesto be ourselves I say this, I
(19:18):
speak at NYU, here in New York,to young people to encourage
them to really dive into notjust who they are, but to be
more of that what they are,because there's so much sameness
and young people they find ithard to make choices because
they think they have to show upas certain idea you know that's
(19:40):
a great point and it's a littlescary maybe to.
Cheryl Fischer (19:44):
I like how you said be more of who you are.
I really like that and I alsoget that in your 20s as well as
really any stage that could bescary, because now maybe people
look at you differently.
Right Now maybe you have tokind of have a bit more strength
and stand up for what youreally want to be.
Anna Rosa Parker (20:03):
Yeah, I think, just having authority for your
decision making.
And there's one thing that Ialso when I work with people, I
really encourage them to be makedecisions when they're in that
parasympathetic nervous system,not in the stress mode, because
that changes our decision makingdrastically.
Cheryl Fischer (20:27):
Huge good point.
Yes, yes.
And before I really knewanything about mindset and
nervous system and all of all ofwhat we know is so powerful,
before I knew any of that, afriend years ago said to me
you're not going to be able toget a good idea about something
I was struggling with unless youcalm down.
And she said just go in a quietroom and close your eyes and
(20:52):
just slowly count to 20 and justcalm yourself and then just see
what happens.
And that's what she wasadvising is to get into the
parasympathetic nervous systemand you never know what could
happen.
And yeah, I didn't have thewords for it yet.
But, yes, it's powerful.
Anna Rosa Parker (21:09):
And, yeah, even if we didn't have the words
for it, but we subconsciouslyknew that we shouldn't be making
, you know, decisions in a hastyand hastiness.
But it's very powerful too,because that only helps you go
more in and into your ownintelligence, intuition.
You know what, what you call it, it to to make this decision
(21:33):
and it's more authentic.
It's more, uh, original, likeeverything we do out of our own,
from ourselves.
It's just so much moreinteresting yeah, okay.
Cheryl Fischer (21:43):
So let me ask you this have you worked with a
client who has been in her 40sor 50s and really kind of
impacted by a lot of the midlifechange that happens?
Yeah, yeah, can you tell uslike a little bit of that?
Anna Rosa Parker (21:58):
Yeah, the stuckness.
I know it's a buzzword, but itreally is.
I think I saw somewhere that70% of people after it's 40
they're going to be stuck atsome point in their life, like
in that era.
And this is when we start toask some questions about what
are we doing?
(22:19):
Why are we doing it like, wheredo I want to go next?
This stuckness sort of takesover and you know, like my
husband's midlife he just wentout and bought a motorcycle and
checked off the bucket list.
Once he went down and broke ashoulder, oh no, but you know
what I mean.
Like women, we have it a littlebit differently.
Not that he isn't mindful, hevery much is.
(22:40):
But when women have this sortof a stuckness, it's really
beautiful to work with peopleand see them open up to this
idea of being themselves andgoing back into because they
might be.
You know, when we are midlifewe've kind of been serving
(23:03):
serving, maybe, children orfamily members, taking care of
others, and it doesn't alwaysinvite us to sit down and like,
oh, I'm really gonna start towrite my own life here, right,
but one, once that stuckness issort of a taken over and I start
working with people, we reallyjust go into your whole
(23:23):
trajectory, where you came fromand where you want to go and why
, and there's just so much like,there's so much eye opening in
that sitting, sitting with themand seeing where and how things
really start to make sense.
Then there is that looking backand making sense of things, and
so we take that and now we canmake decisions going forward.
(23:44):
And I wouldn't tell somebody toquit their attorney job to
become a comedian overnight orsomething like that, but we can
really start to make somechanges towards what we actually
want and what is fulfillingwhat we believe is our purpose,
and a lot of people don't knowwhat their purpose is, and I
(24:04):
okay.
So if you don't know what yourpurpose is and you don't know
what you want to do, lean intoyour curiosity.
What are you curious about?
That's what I always do withwith clients, because we
underestimate curiosity.
We lean so much into thepurpose and the passion, but
there's no way I can bepassionate every day.
I'm not.
I am curious every day, thoughI'm always curious and that
(24:29):
there's so many answers thanthat, like what are you curious
about?
Dive into that, and that mighthelp you become unstuck, because
you will start to dig into whatthat is which, if I were to say
it in the most simple way, justmeans slowing down and paying
(24:54):
attention?
Cheryl Fischer (24:54):
Yeah, absolutely so.
Curiosity kind of forces us todo that, doesn't it?
Maybe I need to recognizewhat's going on around me,
recognize what's going on insideof me, wonder about it.
Yeah, I like that concept a lot.
Anna Rosa Parker (25:08):
Yeah, yeah, I think it's very powerful and
we've spent so much.
I think people have spent a lotof time being disappointed that
they don't understand.
They don't know what theirpurpose is, they don't know what
they're calling or the passionis, but they're going to find
something they're curious about.
For sure.
I think everybody is.
Cheryl Fischer (25:27):
Yeah, yeah, and maybe it turns into a whole new
career and a whole new thing, ormaybe it doesn't, but it turns
into something that we love todo and maybe that's great.
Anna Rosa Parker (25:37):
Yeah, but often does I mean how did you
become a coach?
You were curious about you wereworking on yourself, or right?
Cheryl Fischer (25:45):
Yes, that's exactly my story.
Excellent point.
Okay, if you're listening rightnow, anna just nailed me.
Yes, exactly what happened.
And in fact, funnily enough,years ago I used to say all that
personal development stuff, no,no, no, like I just need to do
(26:06):
the work, that's all just what.
I don't know what I said, butyou know, it's all just silly.
And here I am years later,having gotten curious about it.
And here I am years later,having gotten curious about it
and starting to learn, and then,you know, creating an entire
business out of that.
So beautiful.
Anna Rosa Parker (26:18):
Yeah, congratulations, thank you, you
did that.
Cheryl Fischer (26:22):
You did that on your own, true, and it's.
You know, it's not withoutbumps sometimes, but maybe that
makes it more interesting.
Anna Rosa Parker (26:29):
Yeah, yeah, you know, and that's like you
were asking earlier whensomething stands out in the
story, that can be those bumpstoo, and they're often there to
something we want to polish alittle further, you know, and
also making us make slight leftor slight right, and also
certain learnings.
They just take a few times overand over.
(26:52):
We might get hit by the samething.
It's like we can also betoddlers in a way.
Cheryl Fischer (27:00):
They will stop running down the stairs after
they fall a few times, that's agood point and maybe, going
through this sort ofstorytelling format, we start to
recognize that oh, I am makingthe same mistakes a few times.
Anna Rosa Parker (27:16):
Yeah, absolutely, and that's that's.
It's so eye opening andpowerful and again like just
very, very healing when you canreframe your story and and and
really get the chance todissolve some of the limiting
beliefs and see like, wow, thishas been holding me back for a
(27:36):
while.
And I also back to that clientand you know, midlife or in
stuckness it is often that weare living that story, that our
parents wrote it for us, or, youknow, we're carrying so much BS
in our heads too that we'vecertainly just like gotten lost
in that story, even if we wantedto be mindful of the decisions
(27:59):
we're making.
But the reframe is a lot ofpower, like a personal power in
that.
Cheryl Fischer (28:06):
I love that.
Yeah, so true Things that wedon't even realize that we're
carrying.
Anna Rosa Parker (28:12):
that is how we think it should be still kind
of rattling around in there,yeah, yeah so then, and then,
once you have that, you giveyourself that you know, okay,
I'm telling my own story, I'mbuilding my own life, so you
move forward and it's less aboutfear.
Uh, it's more about embracingpossibilities and start to
(28:32):
celebrate yourself a little bitmore and having fun.
Cheryl Fischer (28:35):
This should be fun uh, yes, right, yes, yes,
and you know what I like thatperspective, because on so many
episodes of this podcast, we'retalking about something that is
a challenge at this phase oflife.
And okay, how will we thinkabout that and how will we go
(28:56):
about that, but overall it canbe fun.
Anna Rosa Parker (29:01):
It can be fun and it is.
It is all challenging, but Ifind like once we're able to
remove some of the fear andreally work through anxiety, it
really we start to become justlighter and see possibilities
versus just problems andchallenges and roadblocks.
I love it.
Cheryl Fischer (29:20):
Okay, so I have to always be mindful of the time
, because we could talk forever.
Yeah, exactly, I love this.
Okay, so, if somebody is reallyresonating with this and
thinking you know this, thisidea of of reframing and
storytelling my life could maybehelp me.
(29:41):
How can people find you orlearn more about what you do?
Anna Rosa Parker (29:46):
Yeah, thank you for asking that.
They can go on my website.
Start there.
It's under my full name,annarosaparker.
com, and they can send me amessage through that.
Also, I'm on LinkedIn under myfull name, Anna Rosa Parker, and
then I have an Instagram thatis currently assigned to my
evoke method, like the frameworkthat I'm just trying out.
Cheryl Fischer (30:07):
Yeah, perfect, and I'll put those in the show
notes too, so that we'll make itreally easy.
Yeah, perfect, and I'll putthose in the show notes too, so
that will make it really easy.
Let's, let's wrap up with this.
I always love to to kind of say, okay, if you don't remember
every single thing that youheard just now, because you're,
you know, folding the laundry ordriving the car or whatever,
while you're listening, what isthe one big OMG, I have to
(30:30):
remember this thing that youwant somebody listening to think
about.
Oh, I love this.
Anna Rosa Parker (30:37):
Okay, I think, then, the most important
takeaway is that you are theauthor of your story.
So, no matter where you are inlife or how stuck you feel that
every day is an opportunity towrite something new and to
understand where you arecurrently in your story today,
(30:57):
where you came from and whereyou are going in your story.
So, for example, like today,job is no longer something that
we just get, it's something wecreate, and same with our life
story.
Cheryl Fischer (31:10):
Oh, I like that.
It's not something we get, it'ssomething we create Interesting
.
Anna Rosa Parker (31:14):
Yeah, yeah, and so is our lives, our story,
our journey, and you know, wecan just start writing it.
Cheryl Fischer (31:22):
Yes, it's empowering.
Anna Rosa Parker (31:24):
Yeah, thank you so much for having me.
I appreciate you.
Cheryl Fischer (31:29):
Be the author of your own life.
As I was having thisconversation with Anna, I almost
feel like I was sitting upstraighter.
I was feeling, feeling trulyfeeling more empowered.
There is something about theidea that we get to write our
(31:50):
own stories that is powerful andimpactful, and so I hope this
episode has been that for you.
Now make sure to grab the linkin the show notes and head over
to my Midlife Patreon community,because I have an extra mini
(32:13):
interview with Anna that is overin Patreon for those Patreon
members, where we talked a bitfurther about midlife and about
those competing desires and eventouched on relationships, which
is really interesting.
So I'll see you over there forsure.
And make sure you've hit thefollow button, because next week
(32:35):
I'm going to share with yousome of the work I've done to
try to figure out how in theworld can I improve my memory?
And doesn't it follow rightalong with this storytelling
idea?
Because maybe now you'rescratching your head and
thinking I need to remember morethings from my life, so let's
(32:56):
talk about it.
I'll see you then, and in themeantime, oh my goodness, let's
keep creating confidence andsuccess, one thought at a time.
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