August 29, 2025 • 39 mins
You’ve probably heard that laughter is the best medicine, and science agrees. But did you know that being funny isn’t something you’re either born with or not? My guest today, Lynn Harris, founder of Gold Comedy, is here to show us that everyone can learn to tap into humor—yes, even you.
In this episode, Lynn shares how comedy is not only a tool for entertainment but also for empowerment, especially for women over 40 and 50 navigating midlife changes. We talk about why women are often conditioned to laugh at jokes instead of making them, how comedy builds confidence, and why humor is such a powerful form of self care.
Lynn also gives practical advice for midlife women who might want to try comedy for fun, personal growth, or even as a new career path. Whether you dream of stepping on stage, adding more lightness into your conversations, or simply boosting your self confidence, this conversation will inspire you to see your funny side in a whole new way.
What you’ll learn in this episode:
- Why midlife is the perfect time to embrace your funny side
- How comedy builds confidence and connection
- Practical steps to notice humor in everyday life
- Why humor is one of the most powerful forms of self care for women in midlife
Resources and links mentioned in this episode:
- Connect with Lynn Harris and learn more about Gold Comedy: goldcomedy.com
- Follow Gold Comedy on Instagram: @goldcomedy
- Try laughter yoga! Listen to the MYM episode with Cathy Nesbitt
💛 Join us in Midlife Pivot on Patreon to hear my bonus conversation with Lynn about how to actually get started with comedy - and what we think about the idea of being "too much": www.patreon.com/mindyourmidlife.
Text me to ask a question - I'll answer on the podcast!
Subscribe to receive bonus episodes at cherylpfischer.com/bonusepisodes.
🌸 Liked this episode? Share it with fellow Gen X women navigating hormone balance, an empty nest, and/or self-confidence!
🫶 Love this show? Leave a review to help more women over 50 find us.
💡Want support through menopause, mindset shifts, or midlife transitions?
- Join the collective by subscribing on Patreon or grab the bonus episodes!
- Book a free Mindset Coaching / Intro Call: cherylpfischer.com/coaching
Let’s talk midlife body positivity, self-talk, and redefining aging for women — without the “midlife crisis” narrative.
Connect with Cheryl, Midlife Coach: Instagram | LinkedIn | Website
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Cheryl Fischer (00:00):
I will eat my hat if you have not heard the
saying laughter is the bestmedicine.
And I'm already chuckling atmyself because it's kind of
silly how often I say I will eatmy hat.
Number one, that's kind of aridiculous saying and it's old.
And number two, I don't evenwear hats.
(00:22):
I don't think they look good onme.
Anyway, laughter is so, so, sopowerful.
It changes the biochemistry inour body.
I am going to link in the shownotes the episode I did with
Kathy Nesbitt about laughteryoga.
(00:43):
With Kathy Nesbitt aboutlaughter yoga, and now we're
kind of taking it a differentway because we tell ourselves
too often that we aren't thatfunny or that we could never
make it.
But anybody could be funny.
So let's talk about it.
Welcome to Mind your Midlife,your go-to resource for
confidence and success.
(01:05):
One thought at a time, unlikemost advice out there, we
believe that simply telling youto believe in yourself or change
your habits isn't enough towake up excited about life or
feel truly confident in yourbody.
Each week you'll gainactionable strategies and oh my
goodness, powerful insights tostop feeling stuck and start
(01:28):
loving your midlife.
This is the Mind your Midlifepodcast.
You are in your 40s, your 50s,your 60s, somewhere around that
range most likely, and you arein a period of life where
(01:48):
there's a lot of change, andmaybe one of the things that has
been on your mind during allthis change is that you wonder
if you could be funny, and maybeyou mean it in the sense that
you'd love to be funny with yourfriends, or maybe you mean it
(02:11):
in a sense that you'd love to bea comedian or you'd love to
write funny things or you'd loveto be on social with comedy,
and you just always thoughtabout it and you just always
thought about it.
Well, now might be exactly theright time Now for me.
I was always shy and I stillhave aspects of this, and it's
(02:36):
interesting because unlesspeople have experienced the same
thing I have, they generallydon't believe me.
When I say this, I'm beingcompletely, 100% honest.
As a kid, I was very shy, oneon one, and I was kind of always
looking for a group, becauseI'm also an extrovert and I get
(02:57):
energy from people Strange combomaybe, or unusual combo maybe,
or unusual combo, I don't know.
Now, as you might guess, I haveabsolutely no qualms talking to
a group, training a group.
I do that a lot in my personaland professional life.
I'm absolutely cool with largegroups, but I still get shy
(03:22):
one-on-one sometimes andunfortunately and you'll know
this if you're similar sometimesit comes across as being maybe
not friendly, and I never wantthat to be the case.
So one of the things that wassuggested to me at one point to
help me come out of my shell wasto do an improv class or to
(03:43):
learn more about comedy, and Ireally, really love the idea of
making people laugh and gosh.
I'd love for my friends toweigh in and my family and tell
me if this is true.
But I think I do make peoplelaugh.
I love to laugh.
I know how healthy it is and ifhealthy plus fun, I mean, come
on, how many things are healthyand fun.
But I also don't want to beself-deprecating all the time.
(04:07):
That's not good for our mindset.
We've discussed that for surein previous episodes.
So I want to learn more abouthow does this actually work and
how might you be able to dip atoe or jump all the way in to
being funny?
And so my guest today is LynnHarris.
(04:28):
She is the founder of GoldComedy.
Gold Comedy is a comedy school,professional network and
content studio where women andreally everyone can grow a
comedy career, can come up withkind of a creative side hustle
(04:49):
and can build a powerfulcommunity based around laughter
and being funny.
What a cool idea.
Lynn founded Gold Comedy.
Lynn learned when she was ateenager how funny she could be
and also realized she was oftenthe only woman actually doing
(05:13):
comedy in whatever scenario shewas in, and so she wanted to
change that for the rest of us.
Welcome, lynn.
Thank you so much for having me.
Okay, is it possible, in youropinion, for anybody who's
listening to learn to be funny?
I don't know if they're wantingto do stand-up or they just
(05:36):
want to be a funny person.
Is it really possible foranybody to do that?
Lynn Harris (05:40):
Yes, and I'll go on , but like full stop.
Everyone has different styles,everyone has different and, yes,
of course, everyone hasdifferent kind of ingrained
skills.
You know, like some people aremore intuitive cooks than others
.
You know some people are moreintuitive athletes than others,
or with particular sports ormusic or whatever it is.
(06:01):
So of course there's a range ofyou know how easily something
comes to you.
We all have that witheverything we do in our lives.
But no one can get good atcomedy without working at it.
No one, not one person.
Seinfeld's work ethic is famous.
Yes, correct, no one, there is.
No, there is no such thing.
And the other and this isrelated, but not the same People
(06:26):
like to say that an overnightsuccess takes about 10 years.
So, yeah, so it all involveswork, will it?
Will some of that work feelharder to some than others?
Yes, but if you have the rightinstructor who's really?
Or the right, just whatever ifyou're in the right environment
where the people around youinspire you to like be, you know
, kind of make you funnier, youknow, like, if you have really
funny college friends, you getfunnier, you know, yeah, yeah.
Or if your instructor is reallyskilled at um, helping you kind
(06:50):
of uncover your natural persona, like who your persona is on
stage, which is generally justkind of 1.3 times who you
already are.
There are some exceptions, butit's generally you.
And if that same person canhelp you really mine your own
life for material, that's notfunny on its face but has comedy
(07:11):
available in it.
It's not about the wacky thingthat happened to you or making
fun of other people, it's likewhat is the sort of normal but
normal but multidimensionalstuff in your life that actually
is fodder for comedy.
If there's someone who can helpyou kind of, who can mirror it
back to you and help you sort offigure out what's funny about
(07:33):
it to you and then apply kind ofuniversal joke mechanics, then,
yes, everyone can come out withsome comedy, everybody.
And then what comes next is youknow what are your goals and
how hard do you, how hard areyou interested in working for
them?
If you're interested in justhaving fun, then that's great,
and if you're, if you'reinterested in really and really
working on it, then you can andyou should.
(07:56):
Yeah, we have a couple of peoplelike who kind of?
We have one woman in our in umwho's a member of gold in our
community, who's a retired,retired high school art teacher
and a retired also a retiredfirefighter, which I didn't know
about her till the other night.
I was like rocky, why didn'tyou it?
Like she did a bit about it andI was like how, how did I not
anyway?
She?
Just she had.
(08:16):
She was one of those I've alwayswanted to try it people who now
is doing comedy all over north.
She's from north carolina, allover north Carolina and it's now
has been working so hard thatshe's coming to New York for two
to do two solo shows of her ownin September.
So she's like this is her new,this is her new thing.
Her post retirement not hobby,but like thing, it's her thing.
She's doing it and for real sheis a comedian.
(08:38):
So and she worked at it, shehad the, she 100% had like
there's she has ease around itCause she sort of was also a
funny art teacher.
But she also has worked very,very hard and she's she's going
places.
Cheryl Fischer (08:51):
I love that and congratulations to her.
That's amazing.
Yeah, she's amazing Be able todo that.
Okay, so you told me and I'veseen you put this in your
materials and on your website Ithink that you're unleashing the
power of funny women and I lovethat and I think it has a lot
(09:14):
of layered meaning to it.
So tell me some more about thepower of being funny.
Lynn Harris (09:20):
We like to say that comedy is power, because when
you make people laugh, you makepeople listen, and so and that's
true of everybody really.
What's interesting, though, isthat if I say to you, like quick
, think of your class clown, orquick, or if I, if I ask AI to
generate a picture of a standupcomic, it's a dude always,
(09:41):
always, always, always, always,always, always, always.
Now, that may be a very nicedude and a very funny dude, but
it's the default setting andit's a little bit uh, I don't
mean to overstate, but it's alittle bit like what if we just
what if we unleash the power ofwomen, women, women I mean just
never mind the funny women justwhat if we just unleash the?
It's a, it's a way of sayingwhat if we just unleash the
(10:04):
power of women instead of, youknow, relegating us to um job,
dead-end jobs or under the youknow where we're never going to
cross the glass ceiling, or whatif we actually listen to women
talk, or what if we actually, um, treated women as full humans?
It's a way of saying that comedyisn't the only important
(10:26):
cultural force, but it is animportant cultural force, so it
shapes perceptions, and it has ahierarchy of its own because,
as we said, when you make peoplelaugh, you make people listen,
and also it's a job and it's anindustry.
So it also matters that women,as in any industry, have power
(10:51):
and voice in that industry.
And because comedy is acultural force, it matters even
more because the faces and thevoices the faces we see, the
voices we hear matter, yeah, andin terms of our perceptions of
who has power and who shouldhave power.
So those are just a few of thelayers that are baked into your
(11:13):
very deep first question.
Cheryl Fischer (11:16):
Well, and I knew that we could maybe dive into
this a little bit and that iswhy I did that.
So, yes, really fascinatinglayers there.
And when you said class clown,it really kind of made me think.
It's so true that I bet youanybody listening to this is
thinking of a kid they knew inelementary school.
(11:36):
When you say class clown, a boykid that they knew, and that's
what I was thinking of, and thenI was thinking, thinking gosh,
does that then kind of color forour whole lives?
Who we think is funny?
And I think that happens inelementary school sometimes,
because boys and girls developat different rates and the boys
are kind of silly and immatureand it's not their fault.
(11:57):
But does that then mean wethink of boys as funnier for the
rest of our lives?
Lynn Harris (12:02):
that's why, yes, the answer is and I'm not being
flip, I don't have it in frontof me, but the answer is yes,
that's when the gendereddifferences get kind of formed
and hardened.
Wow, and it's science.
You can Google it or I'll findit later and you'll put it in
the show notes.
And, to oversimplify with theis, and that's when, and to use
(12:23):
just you know, to oversimplifywith the gender binary, that's
when that's the young age, evenstarting as young as six, if I'm
not mistaken is when boys startto be, girls start to be, boys
start to be conditioned to bethe ones to make the jokes and
girls start to be conditioned tobe the ones that laugh at them.
Wow, and, and you know it's,it's kind of intermingled with.
(12:44):
You know, do boys always getrewarded for that?
Not necessarily, like you know,it's often.
You know the the.
So, in fairness, you know it'soften like the boys who are told
to take it easy when actuallyit's more natural and
appropriate for them to berunning around.
You know, I'm I'moversimplifying tons of?
Cheryl Fischer (12:59):
of course we are .
Of course we are.
We're speaking in stereotype,yeah.
Lynn Harris (13:03):
Yeah, yeah, or well , not stereotypes, but
oversimplifications, I shouldsay, of the way of the, the way
that the just the culturalmessages and behaviors that
become ingrained and and girlsmore often than not are, even
though it seems like it's coolto be the class clown, it is not
necessarily rewarded for theboys.
That's what I'm just saying.
And then, but also you knowmany of us, those just saying
(13:26):
and then, but also you know,many of us, those of us of a
certain age or Gen X may in factbe even though times were
changing, you know for sure, bythen, you know, we may be old
enough to remember beingencouraged, you know, being
encouraged to, you know, sitstill and look pretty and
probably getting pretty good atit, you know.
So, not unless we really foughtthat, or unless we just weren't
in that kind of environment, wealso absorbed those messages of
(13:47):
like, that's not.
You know, I'm the audience.
Cheryl Fischer (13:49):
Wow, I'm fascinated by that because I
think you're right and I don'tthink I ever sat down and
thought I'm the audience, but Ifeel it resonates with me when
you say that.
Like, I feel like maybe that'show I've had interactions with
people and for me, theinteresting thing is I would
(14:09):
love to learn how to be morefunny, and we're going to talk
about that, and I think I amoften funny, but yet I still am
hearing what you're saying, thatmaybe I wasn't conditioned to
take that role.
It's very interesting, yeah.
Lynn Harris (14:25):
Yeah, I mean, there's a million exceptions and
all those things, but I'mspeaking, you know, broadly
speaking, those are the culturalmessages that, in certain
environments, we were raisedwith.
Cheryl Fischer (14:36):
Yeah, and if we take another layer to this,
unleashing our power, I'm alsothinking that in order to be
funny whether it's a formal orjust an informal setting we have
to be self-confident in thefact that whatever we're saying
or doing will be funny andpeople will like it.
So there's got to be someaspect of confidence in there,
(14:57):
which is sort of another layerof power.
Lynn Harris (15:00):
Yeah, yeah, that's true, although the only kind of
nuance I would put on that is, Iwould not view absolute
confidence in one's jokes andsense of humor as a prerequisite
to taking a crack at comedy.
Because you know, for even themost seasoned comedians we all
you know chestnut Even they havestage fright, even they are shy
(15:21):
, even they are nervous, we knowthis right.
And also they never know howlike one joke could land, could
destroy in one place and bomb inanother.
And, by the way, destroying,bomb are the opposite.
So weird, funny, all thoseviolent metaphors for comedy.
But whatever, I wonder who madethose up.
I wonder which window runscomedy?
It's a little bit of a chickenand egg thing.
(15:42):
And what really seasoned.
What good comedy, let's put itthis way, what good comedy
instructors or good comedymentors are apt to say is that
you start with what's funny toyou.
It's not about, and yourconfidence shouldn't come from
whether or not people like you,whether or not does that sound
(16:03):
like good advice for life, butalso whether or not people liked
a joke in any given moment.
Yes, of course you need todevelop your jokes and tweak
them and always be fiddling withthem, based on audience
reaction in the aggregate.
And yes, of course you're doingjokes to get laughs, I mean, of
course, but where you?
But but where you start is nothow do I please the audience?
(16:25):
How do I please the audience?
How do I please the audience?
How do I please the audience?
It's what do I find hilariousand how can I make that connect
with the audience such that theyfind it hilarious too?
So confidence is, of course,part of it, but it's not like
the biggest, it's honestly notthe biggest.
Like, don't wait for theconfidence to do comedy.
Cheryl Fischer (16:42):
Yeah, but what I'm hearing you say, though, is
that it's about trustingyourself and believing that if
you find something funny, thenmaybe somebody else will, and so
there's some layer of selfconfidence in there, for sure.
Lynn Harris (16:55):
Yeah, yeah, I mean at least to get started right.
But the other but again it'slike but also doing it builds
confidence.
So like I'm just the only thingI want to pull out from there
is like, don't wait for theconfidence to show up If you
want to give it a whirl, becauseit, you know it, you get it
from doing it.
Cheryl Fischer (17:11):
Yeah, that's a great point and, as you said a
minute ago, life lesson stopwaiting to feel totally ready
and confident before you dosomething, right.
So let's say that somebody isreally wanting to try this
comedy thing and I'm going tocome back and ask you about the
person who, who kind of justwants to be funny in their life,
(17:33):
but somebody really wants toget started in comedy.
What would you recommend thatthey do to get started?
Lynn Harris (17:43):
Well, obviously, I recommend that they check out a
gold comedy, but before that,but in general, you know, know,
in anywhere, um, I recommendthat they find a place where
they feel comfortable and feelthat they can be themselves if
it's a class, whatever it is, um, and feel that they can truly
be themselves.
One of the reasons that goldexists is often, you know, the,
the often, even the most, eventhe best classes or open mics or
(18:05):
whatever that are available, ifthey are still still tend to be
be, you know, dominated bydudes, and even very nice dudes,
even whatever, but it, you know, if you're, you know, 55, and
you know, are nervous aboutstarting this, you know, even
the nicest bunch may not feellike, okay, these are my people,
(18:25):
you know to you, they might,but they might not.
That's why it's important tofind a place that really, where
you really feel like that, youknow, you, there's a mirror
shining back to you, you know,where people, where you cause
not every audience.
You don't have to make everyonelaugh, not every, even the best
comics don't.
Not everyone is their crowd,you know.
So, if they're not your crowd,that's fine.
You, you, I say, find yourcrowd, whether it's meaning both
(18:47):
your audience and your crew andso find people who you feel
comfortable with, who you feellike you make mistakes in front
of, who you can have your jokesfall flat in front of as you
develop them.
For many people, that is goldcomedy and that's what we're
designed to be, but that's thesecret sauce that we are going
for, and specifically no brovibe.
(19:08):
I mean that's why we'redesigned to welcome anybody,
anybody and everybody, but whatwe don't welcome is a bro vibe,
because that's mostly whatpeople are trying to escape.
So I recommend finding a placewhere you feel comfortable
taking a class.
Taking a class is always what Irecommend to people, always.
It's almost any comedian youtalk to is often where they got
their start.
The other thing I recommend is,if you're not there yet, I kind
(19:31):
of made this up based on theidea of we all know gratitude
journals, and one thing that Isometimes recommend and I
haven't thought of a cute namefor it, yet you can DM me if you
think of one is things in mylife that could be maybe funny
one day.
Journal meaning jotting downwhether it's whatever your jam
is, you know, on your notes appor on a notebook that you carry
(19:53):
with you, like just things thathappen during the day.
That aren't necessarily funnythings, you know, it's not like
I slipped on a banana peel, youknow but like things you notice.
Things you notice Like thesubway voice sounds weird, you
know.
Or just you know, awkwardlybalancing 20, you know, when
you're walking with like 20different bags and also putting
(20:14):
on lipstick or I don't, you know, I don't, I'm just making stuff
up.
They're not cause, they're notfully formed jokes.
They're not jokes, they're justlike things that you notice
during the day that are eitherawkward or challenge, even just
challenging, um, or could beslapstick, sure, or even just
like something funny.
You text to your friend andyou're like wait a minute, that
was kind of funny actually, youknow.
(20:34):
And but my point is mostly theydon't have to be jokes yet and
or even just like stray thoughts.
You know, like coming into thekitchen and being like what if I
just didn't do the dish, youknow, and then, and then just
like write that down and thenlater you come back to it and
then you actually start writinga joke around.
It Know literally what wouldhappen and that's where the
jokes would come from.
Right, literally what wouldhappen.
(20:56):
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
My point is, if you are able tojot down 1, 2, 3, 4, 10 things a
day that are just possiblymaterial, and not trying to be
funny or looking for funny sillythings or just things that just
occur to you, that you evenwrite down with a question mark,
(21:17):
you know, like like me with mycat you know, my cat, literally
like I went to open my lipstickbefore this, I got in the zoom
with you and I noticed that whenmy cat knocked it off the table
, all of the lipstick wound upin the top part.
No, it's also because it'sreally hot.
So, like my lipstick is so hotthat it just melts, you know.
So that's, I don't know, it'snot a joke yet, but but like
(21:39):
lipstick melted in heat, youknow.
But when you go back to it youcan see patterns, you can see
ideas, you can see things that,like, you don't even have to
write jokes yet you could justbe like, oh, if I wanted to
write jokes, I wouldn't have tostart with a blank page.
Cheryl Fischer (21:54):
Yes, I I love this idea and I love that you
are sort of likening it to agratitude journal, because one
of the things that I learned,maybe last year or so, is this
idea of a glimmer.
I don't know if you've heardthe word glimmer.
Lynn Harris (22:09):
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Cheryl Fischer (22:10):
Yeah, and, and what you're describing is kind
of like that, and so I know, ifyou're listening, you've heard
me say glimmer before, but justin case you haven't, it's the
idea of looking for things inyour life, little moments that
make you happy the sunrise orthe whatever, whatever, the
smell of something, and ittrains your brain to look for
(22:31):
more, and so that's what you'resaying.
Yeah, train your brain to lookfor funny or kind of odd things
that happen.
Lynn Harris (22:42):
But what a nice light energy that is in general
and I love that Yep, and as withnoticing glimmers, it
cultivates the habit of noticingthat you in general, and and I
love that Yep, and as withnoticing glimmers, it's the it
cultivates the habit of noticingthat you're noticing, because I
swear to God and I am, I am100% sure that you've said this
If you don't write it down, youthink you're going to remember,
but you will not have to.
(23:03):
You have to write it down.
The only way I'm going toremember the thing about the
lipstick is that we're recordingthis you know, like, like you,
will you?
and you don't even have to be asold as we are to um to to
forget.
You have to write it down.
I don't care what system youuse, I don't care if you use
voice notes, but whatever it is,and the bar has to be for the,
(23:27):
for the comedy't write anythingdown.
The bar is just like anythingthat like could be a thing and
in fact, okay, I'll give youthis gold was gonna.
One of the things that one ofthe swag items we want to make
is a notebook that say on thefront, there's something there.
So I love that.
Yeah, we already have pens thatsay write that down.
And then the notebook would saythere's something there and
(23:47):
like that's it.
There.
Just has to be something there,that's it.
Cheryl Fischer (23:50):
Yes, I see how this is powerful and then the
combination of taking some sortof class and learning how to
then create this into an actualjoke or something that you could
do with it would kind of cometogether.
Lynn Harris (24:07):
Exactly, and yeah, because then you're basically
you're doing your pre homework.
Cheryl Fischer (24:11):
Yeah, yeah, okay .
So let's let's kind of flip itnow to somebody who maybe isn't
necessarily wanting to be on astage and tell jokes and be a
comedian in that way, but wantsto be more funny in their
interactions with people,whether it's work or friends or
(24:32):
who knows what.
What would be your advice tothem?
Lynn Harris (24:36):
Sure.
Well, first of all, one thingthat's a little bit of an
indirect answer is just areminder that when we say comedy
, we say so many things.
We might be saying stand up.
We might be saying writing forlate night.
We might be saying writing,writing sketch.
We might be saying improv.
We might be saying writing forlate night.
We might be saying writing,writing sketch.
We might be saying improv.
We might be saying working forbrands, working in advertising.
Um, you know, three out of fourconsumers want their brands to
(24:57):
be funny.
Which is funny is actuallyfunny.
Interesting because people sayI'm totally on a side note.
People say it actually.
It's not just because it makestheir brands more entertaining.
It actually there's scienceabout this creates trust with a
brand.
When a brand is funny and thesame is true of, like, funny
managers and leaders.
It's not just like they crackedme up, it's partly that, but it
(25:19):
builds trust because you feel akinship, because you sort of
you're in on their joke andthey're in on your joke.
You get each other.
Yes, so I know a lot of comicswho, either on the side or as
their full-time jobs like thisis what they do now write social
for brands.
So even that I would includethat in comedy.
(25:40):
So first of all, for yourlisteners, if you're curious
about what kind of comedy at allin any sort of professional
realm might be something toexplore.
Oh, there's also TV writing.
We talk about TV writing,writing a pilot we have.
We have women writing theirfirst pilots in their fifties,
all the time at gold, and evenselling them and having them go
into production.
So you know.
So there's that.
(26:00):
So, first of all, if you'relike comedy but I don't want to
be on stage, click, click awayfrom podcasts, I'm like no,
there's so many ways, there's amillion things.
I see that, yeah.
Cheryl Fischer (26:10):
Yeah.
Lynn Harris (26:10):
Okay, but your next question, to answer your next
question, to answer it sort of alittle bit backwards for sure,
comedy skills are life skills,for sure, and this is also
science, that learning totraining yourself, whether it be
a professional or or just withthe skills, science, science,
science helps you think faster,write sharper, read a room,
(26:30):
listen better, all those things.
But to turn that around theother way, some of the
components of sort of beingfunny in your daily life come
from listening and reading theroom.
People think it comes fromalways coming up with the
wisecrack, but the ones whoalways come up with the
(26:51):
wisecrack are the ones who arelistening and reading the room
not the ones who walked into aroom writing a joke already.
So, and those wisecracks don'teven always have to be hilarious
, and even if it's, what I liketo say is it's you know, if
you're, I always tell you, like,open a keynote with a joke,
which is very iffy advice to meLike, of course you should, but
like that also makes people openkeynotes with terrible jokes
(27:15):
because they feel pressure tolike write a joke, yeah, and
then it feels awkward and weird.
Yeah, I think people need moreguidance around what that means
and what will work and whatwon't.
But even just like I don't knowin a meeting, like if just it
often comes down to being theone who's willing to say what's
so, like, if it's freezing, sayit's freezing, it doesn't even
have to be a joke.
(27:35):
Like anyone else need mittens,you know, like and P, and then
people kind of relax and theconnect with you and it puts
others at ease.
But it comes from reading theroom, not from walking in there
ready to make them laugh.
So it's actually the bar ispretty low and just the bar is
just somewhere around.
Being willing to say out loudwhat you think might be on other
(27:55):
people's minds.
Yes, people will love you ifyou're the one to like gently
break the awkward silence or saythe thing that everyone's
thinking about, not saying Stufflike that.
So that's one thing I wouldkind of even if you don't do it
right away like watch and listenfor those moments, like
(28:17):
practice reading the room.
And women, honestly, I reallyreally try.
I do not take lightly you knowkind of women are better at this
and and just sort of do sort oflazy or oversimplified.
You know differences betweenmen and women, but it is.
I think it is fair to say thatone of the things we are trained
to do is read a room, like thekind of the chestnut about how,
like you know you walk into aparty and you immediately know
who's who's seeing who, who'sflirting with whom, who's.
(28:39):
You know who's who's in charge,who's like.
We just not like often, notalways, you know we're just it's
fair to say that we're trainedto do that.
So my other point being, likeit's not the heart, so it's to
read a room, it's just.
Then what are you going to say?
That's amusing.
It doesn't have to be funny,but amusing and gives people.
(28:59):
It doesn't have to be apunchline, just an observation.
That is likely what everyone isthinking and feeling at that
moment is a great is a, I think,a pretty safe, a pretty safe
place to start.
Cheryl Fischer (29:10):
And maybe, if that observation is made with a
little bit of I don't even knowhow to describe it, but just
like a little bit of humor, alighter tone or a smile or
whatever, maybe that does it.
Lynn Harris (29:22):
Yeah, or just thinking of like what's?
What's the slightly funny way Icould say this Like, instead of
saying like what I said before,like like okay, see, it's cold
in here, but no one's sayinganything, maybe we should read
everyone's putting on their,putting on their pashminas, and
you know, maybe we should, youknow, but something I mean, you
know.
And so instead of saying likeis everyone else freezing, like
okay, okay, what, how can I saythat with one specific word
(29:44):
that's slightly funnier, likedoes that have any mittens?
You know before, like mittensis funny, but it's not like a
joke.
Cheryl Fischer (29:51):
Right, right, adding humor to what's happening
.
Lynn Harris (29:54):
And just thinking of, like what's one specific
word I could use that heightensthis or you know so little
things like that, little thingslike that I also.
I think it's helpful also tonotice, like when you're with
the people, like, notice how itfeels to be with the people with
whom you're your funniest andnotice, like, what kinds of
jokes are you making?
What gets a laugh?
What do you usually?
(30:14):
What's your vibe on your, onyour group chat?
Like, what's your style?
What do you you know?
What are you?
What's your?
Are you sarcastic?
Are you dry?
Are you silly?
Are you know what's your?
Just kind of notice that that'syou know.
(30:35):
That's how you're funny.
And are there places where youcould?
Are there other contexts thatyou can find to kind of
tentatively and begin totentatively, begin to apply that
same kind of approach, becauseyou already know you got it.
Cheryl Fischer (30:50):
Yes, that's a great point.
Okay, so one of the pieces ofadvice I've gotten before is to
take an improv class.
What are your thoughts?
Lynn Harris (30:58):
Oh yeah, sure, yeah , we offer improv.
In fact, fun fact about Gold,she's also Gen X.
Actually, our improv teachercame to us as a member.
She's a SAG-AFTRA actor, she'san improv instructor and she
came to us because she wanted totry standup.
And now she says she says nowI'm winning awards all over
(31:20):
Louisville where she lives andenvirons and hosting rooms and
staying up late all night and Iblame you, lynn, because now
she's a successful standup.
Anyway, I personally feel morecomfortable with standup and
improv, but so I'm not an experton improv, but improv does do.
All the things they say,absolutely, you know, full, full
stop.
So in terms of getting them outof your head, certainly with
(31:41):
listening all of the things,yeah, you know, certainly.
Yeah, having to listen, havingto build instead of block, you
know, all those things arepeople.
People swear by it.
So I just think my only sort ofpersonal opinion and this is
not a dig on improv at all, soplease, nobody at me.
And again, when we're talkingabout comedy, here we're talking
about all the kinds of comedy.
But there's something really, ifyou go back to comedy and power
(32:03):
, there's just somethinginteresting.
And women, there's somethinginteresting to me about stand-up
and women and the idea of beingalone, not only being, you know
, like being alone on a stagewhere people, especially men,
have to listen to you.
Being alone on a stage wherepeople, especially men, have to
listen to you, ah, and you'reasking me which you are about,
gender and comedy and all thatstuff.
(32:23):
Women also know how to play ona team, true, or at least, to
put it another way, it's fair tosay that that is a thing we are
trained to do.
Yes, love improv, everybody,please, do improv.
But when you're asking me abouthow gender fits in, I think
there's something very.
I just think there's somethingextra juicy not bad about improv
(32:44):
, but extra juicy about thepower of standup, yes, and how
it runs counter to the thingsthat again to oversimplify with
the binary, how it runs counterto the ways that both women and
men have been trained to relateto themselves and each other.
Cheryl Fischer (33:01):
Really interesting yeah.
Lynn Harris (33:03):
But once again, I love improv.
Cheryl Fischer (33:06):
I think she loves improv.
Okay, so you've mentioned it acouple of times, but if someone
is curious about what you'reoffering with Gold Comedy and
wants to find you or connectwith you, how can they do that?
Lynn Harris (33:20):
Oh, thank you for asking.
It's super easy.
We you can visit our website,goldcomedycom G-O-L-D comedy.
You can find us on Instagram,gold comedy.
Same thing.
We're also on Facebook andTikTok.
You can find and YouTube.
You can find all that easilyfrom our home base If you DM.
Here's some.
If you DM me, I'm also LynnHarris on Instagram and also
(33:44):
comedy on Instagram.
If you email me through thewebsite or DM me on social and
tell me you heard me on thispodcast, we'll get you a little
discount on whatever it is youwant to do.
We run mostly by annualmembership, which includes
everything all of the classes,workshops, celebrity speaker
series, open mics, just all.
We also have premium classesthat overlap but work a little
(34:06):
bit differently.
So, depending on what you'recurious about, we'll figure out
some sort of 10% something foryou if you tell me that you
found me through this podcast.
Cheryl Fischer (34:16):
I love it All right, and I'll make sure to put
all that information in theshow notes too, so to make it
easy.
Okay, then the last questionthat I want to kind of wrap up
with, because I'm alwaysimagining somebody's listening
to this while they're doingdishes or folding the laundry or
driving the car or whatever,and they're not going to
remember every single thing,although you can just re-listen,
(34:36):
right, but what is the?
Oh my goodness, I really wantto make sure they remember at
least this one thing.
What is that in your opinion?
Lynn Harris (34:48):
Everybody can be funny.
You're probably already funny.
You don't have to be a certainway before you get funny.
You don't have to be less shy,you don't have to be more
confident.
You just have to be willing torecognize that there is already
material, as we call it, everyminute and every day of your
life, and be curious about howyou might turn that into comedy
(35:12):
that is unique to you, which isreally the only way you can do
it.
Cheryl Fischer (35:16):
Oh, fantastic answer.
I love that.
It's such to me, it's such anempowering concept to think that
we can all be funny in our ownway, and I guess that sort of
circles us right back around tothe way we started this episode
about this whole thing beingempowering.
So that's fantastic.
Lynn, thank you so much forjoining me.
I have loved this conversation.
(35:37):
Thank you so much.
Okay, what I want you to takefrom this episode is absolutely
what Lynn just said.
Anyone can be funny, and thatincludes you.
Yes, and I also want you tokeep in mind this idea of
keeping a list, a journal, anotebook whatever you want to
(35:57):
call it of interesting or maybethere's something to that kind
of things that happen in yourlife, whether you ever do
anything with it or not.
I love this idea so muchbecause sometimes we resist the
idea of a gratitude journal alittle bit, because we think I'm
(36:17):
just going to be writing downthe same thing every day the
sunset was beautiful, the coffeetastes good.
Maybe it becomes a gratitudeslash, funny stuff journal and
we don't want to necessarilycall it that, because I take her
point that it's just these sortof odd little things that
happen that we think maybethere's something there sort of
(36:40):
odd little things that happenthat we think maybe there's
something there.
So I was thinking the other day.
I live in a courtyard oftownhouses and there was a new
family moving in the other dayand all of us inside my house
and probably inside theneighbor's houses, had our noses
basically pressed to the windowbecause we noticed they weren't
moving in with a moving truck,they just had a flatbed off a
(37:03):
pickup truck and a tarp over itand we were trying to figure out
who was moving in and wecouldn't pick from the people
who it was.
I might write that down on mylist, because what would I do
with it, I don't know, but whenI look back it will amuse me.
And even if that's all I everdo with this list, that's
powerful.
We are taking the conversationfurther in Patreon Lynn and I
(37:27):
took a little bit more time toreally go into detail on the how
of going forward with this.
So make sure that you arehanging with us in the Midlife
Pivot Patreon community.
It's patreoncom slashmindyourmidlife.
You can grab the link in theshow notes.
I'll see you there and you'llget to hear the rest of that
(37:49):
discussion and then, whereveryou are listening, if you would
tap the five stars.
That would be amazing.
If you're listening on Apple,if you would take a moment and
give a review.
Those reviews help tell Applethat more people might be
interested in hearing thispodcast, and that is so amazing.
I am thankful for every singlereview that comes in and, in the
(38:14):
meantime, keep rememberingmidlife is your time to slow
down, notice your life, what'sgoing on around you, what's
going on in your head, andcreate something amazing.
I will eat my hat if you have not heard the
saying laughter is the bestmedicine.
And I'm already chuckling atmyself because it's kind of
silly how often I say I will eatmy hat.
Number one, that's kind of aridiculous saying and it's old.
And number two, I don't evenwear hats.
(00:22):
I don't think they look good onme.
Anyway, laughter is so, so, sopowerful.
It changes the biochemistry inour body.
I am going to link in the shownotes the episode I did with
Kathy Nesbitt about laughteryoga.
(00:43):
With Kathy Nesbitt aboutlaughter yoga, and now we're
kind of taking it a differentway because we tell ourselves
too often that we aren't thatfunny or that we could never
make it.
But anybody could be funny.
So let's talk about it.
Welcome to Mind your Midlife,your go-to resource for
confidence and success.
(01:05):
One thought at a time, unlikemost advice out there, we
believe that simply telling youto believe in yourself or change
your habits isn't enough towake up excited about life or
feel truly confident in yourbody.
Each week you'll gainactionable strategies and oh my
goodness, powerful insights tostop feeling stuck and start
(01:28):
loving your midlife.
This is the Mind your Midlifepodcast.
You are in your 40s, your 50s,your 60s, somewhere around that
range most likely, and you arein a period of life where
(01:48):
there's a lot of change, andmaybe one of the things that has
been on your mind during allthis change is that you wonder
if you could be funny, and maybeyou mean it in the sense that
you'd love to be funny with yourfriends, or maybe you mean it
(02:11):
in a sense that you'd love to bea comedian or you'd love to
write funny things or you'd loveto be on social with comedy,
and you just always thoughtabout it and you just always
thought about it.
Well, now might be exactly theright time Now for me.
I was always shy and I stillhave aspects of this, and it's
(02:36):
interesting because unlesspeople have experienced the same
thing I have, they generallydon't believe me.
When I say this, I'm beingcompletely, 100% honest.
As a kid, I was very shy, oneon one, and I was kind of always
looking for a group, becauseI'm also an extrovert and I get
(02:57):
energy from people Strange combomaybe, or unusual combo maybe,
or unusual combo, I don't know.
Now, as you might guess, I haveabsolutely no qualms talking to
a group, training a group.
I do that a lot in my personaland professional life.
I'm absolutely cool with largegroups, but I still get shy
(03:22):
one-on-one sometimes andunfortunately and you'll know
this if you're similar sometimesit comes across as being maybe
not friendly, and I never wantthat to be the case.
So one of the things that wassuggested to me at one point to
help me come out of my shell wasto do an improv class or to
(03:43):
learn more about comedy, and Ireally, really love the idea of
making people laugh and gosh.
I'd love for my friends toweigh in and my family and tell
me if this is true.
But I think I do make peoplelaugh.
I love to laugh.
I know how healthy it is and ifhealthy plus fun, I mean, come
on, how many things are healthyand fun.
But I also don't want to beself-deprecating all the time.
(04:07):
That's not good for our mindset.
We've discussed that for surein previous episodes.
So I want to learn more abouthow does this actually work and
how might you be able to dip atoe or jump all the way in to
being funny?
And so my guest today is LynnHarris.
(04:28):
She is the founder of GoldComedy.
Gold Comedy is a comedy school,professional network and
content studio where women andreally everyone can grow a
comedy career, can come up withkind of a creative side hustle
(04:49):
and can build a powerfulcommunity based around laughter
and being funny.
What a cool idea.
Lynn founded Gold Comedy.
Lynn learned when she was ateenager how funny she could be
and also realized she was oftenthe only woman actually doing
(05:13):
comedy in whatever scenario shewas in, and so she wanted to
change that for the rest of us.
Welcome, lynn.
Thank you so much for having me.
Okay, is it possible, in youropinion, for anybody who's
listening to learn to be funny?
I don't know if they're wantingto do stand-up or they just
(05:36):
want to be a funny person.
Is it really possible foranybody to do that?
Lynn Harris (05:40):
Yes, and I'll go on , but like full stop.
Everyone has different styles,everyone has different and, yes,
of course, everyone hasdifferent kind of ingrained
skills.
You know, like some people aremore intuitive cooks than others
.
You know some people are moreintuitive athletes than others,
or with particular sports ormusic or whatever it is.
(06:01):
So of course there's a range ofyou know how easily something
comes to you.
We all have that witheverything we do in our lives.
But no one can get good atcomedy without working at it.
No one, not one person.
Seinfeld's work ethic is famous.
Yes, correct, no one, there is.
No, there is no such thing.
And the other and this isrelated, but not the same People
(06:26):
like to say that an overnightsuccess takes about 10 years.
So, yeah, so it all involveswork, will it?
Will some of that work feelharder to some than others?
Yes, but if you have the rightinstructor who's really?
Or the right, just whatever ifyou're in the right environment
where the people around youinspire you to like be, you know
, kind of make you funnier, youknow, like, if you have really
funny college friends, you getfunnier, you know, yeah, yeah.
Or if your instructor is reallyskilled at um, helping you kind
(06:50):
of uncover your natural persona, like who your persona is on
stage, which is generally justkind of 1.3 times who you
already are.
There are some exceptions, butit's generally you.
And if that same person canhelp you really mine your own
life for material, that's notfunny on its face but has comedy
(07:11):
available in it.
It's not about the wacky thingthat happened to you or making
fun of other people, it's likewhat is the sort of normal but
normal but multidimensionalstuff in your life that actually
is fodder for comedy.
If there's someone who can helpyou kind of, who can mirror it
back to you and help you sort offigure out what's funny about
(07:33):
it to you and then apply kind ofuniversal joke mechanics, then,
yes, everyone can come out withsome comedy, everybody.
And then what comes next is youknow what are your goals and
how hard do you, how hard areyou interested in working for
them?
If you're interested in justhaving fun, then that's great,
and if you're, if you'reinterested in really and really
working on it, then you can andyou should.
(07:56):
Yeah, we have a couple of peoplelike who kind of?
We have one woman in our in umwho's a member of gold in our
community, who's a retired,retired high school art teacher
and a retired also a retiredfirefighter, which I didn't know
about her till the other night.
I was like rocky, why didn'tyou it?
Like she did a bit about it andI was like how, how did I not
anyway?
She?
Just she had.
(08:16):
She was one of those I've alwayswanted to try it people who now
is doing comedy all over north.
She's from north carolina, allover north Carolina and it's now
has been working so hard thatshe's coming to New York for two
to do two solo shows of her ownin September.
So she's like this is her new,this is her new thing.
Her post retirement not hobby,but like thing, it's her thing.
She's doing it and for real sheis a comedian.
(08:38):
So and she worked at it, shehad the, she 100% had like
there's she has ease around itCause she sort of was also a
funny art teacher.
But she also has worked very,very hard and she's she's going
places.
Cheryl Fischer (08:51):
I love that and congratulations to her.
That's amazing.
Yeah, she's amazing Be able todo that.
Okay, so you told me and I'veseen you put this in your
materials and on your website Ithink that you're unleashing the
power of funny women and I lovethat and I think it has a lot
(09:14):
of layered meaning to it.
So tell me some more about thepower of being funny.
Lynn Harris (09:20):
We like to say that comedy is power, because when
you make people laugh, you makepeople listen, and so and that's
true of everybody really.
What's interesting, though, isthat if I say to you, like quick
, think of your class clown, orquick, or if I, if I ask AI to
generate a picture of a standupcomic, it's a dude always,
(09:41):
always, always, always, always,always, always, always.
Now, that may be a very nicedude and a very funny dude, but
it's the default setting andit's a little bit uh, I don't
mean to overstate, but it's alittle bit like what if we just
what if we unleash the power ofwomen, women, women I mean just
never mind the funny women justwhat if we just unleash the?
It's a, it's a way of sayingwhat if we just unleash the
(10:04):
power of women instead of, youknow, relegating us to um job,
dead-end jobs or under the youknow where we're never going to
cross the glass ceiling, or whatif we actually listen to women
talk, or what if we actually, um, treated women as full humans?
It's a way of saying that comedyisn't the only important
(10:26):
cultural force, but it is animportant cultural force, so it
shapes perceptions, and it has ahierarchy of its own because,
as we said, when you make peoplelaugh, you make people listen,
and also it's a job and it's anindustry.
So it also matters that women,as in any industry, have power
(10:51):
and voice in that industry.
And because comedy is acultural force, it matters even
more because the faces and thevoices the faces we see, the
voices we hear matter, yeah, andin terms of our perceptions of
who has power and who shouldhave power.
So those are just a few of thelayers that are baked into your
(11:13):
very deep first question.
Cheryl Fischer (11:16):
Well, and I knew that we could maybe dive into
this a little bit and that iswhy I did that.
So, yes, really fascinatinglayers there.
And when you said class clown,it really kind of made me think.
It's so true that I bet youanybody listening to this is
thinking of a kid they knew inelementary school.
(11:36):
When you say class clown, a boykid that they knew, and that's
what I was thinking of, and thenI was thinking, thinking gosh,
does that then kind of color forour whole lives?
Who we think is funny?
And I think that happens inelementary school sometimes,
because boys and girls developat different rates and the boys
are kind of silly and immatureand it's not their fault.
(11:57):
But does that then mean wethink of boys as funnier for the
rest of our lives?
Lynn Harris (12:02):
that's why, yes, the answer is and I'm not being
flip, I don't have it in frontof me, but the answer is yes,
that's when the gendereddifferences get kind of formed
and hardened.
Wow, and it's science.
You can Google it or I'll findit later and you'll put it in
the show notes.
And, to oversimplify with theis, and that's when, and to use
(12:23):
just you know, to oversimplifywith the gender binary, that's
when that's the young age, evenstarting as young as six, if I'm
not mistaken is when boys startto be, girls start to be, boys
start to be conditioned to bethe ones to make the jokes and
girls start to be conditioned tobe the ones that laugh at them.
Wow, and, and you know it's,it's kind of intermingled with.
(12:44):
You know, do boys always getrewarded for that?
Not necessarily, like you know,it's often.
You know the the.
So, in fairness, you know it'soften like the boys who are told
to take it easy when actuallyit's more natural and
appropriate for them to berunning around.
You know, I'm I'moversimplifying tons of?
Cheryl Fischer (12:59):
of course we are .
Of course we are.
We're speaking in stereotype,yeah.
Lynn Harris (13:03):
Yeah, yeah, or well , not stereotypes, but
oversimplifications, I shouldsay, of the way of the, the way
that the just the culturalmessages and behaviors that
become ingrained and and girlsmore often than not are, even
though it seems like it's coolto be the class clown, it is not
necessarily rewarded for theboys.
That's what I'm just saying.
And then, but also you knowmany of us, those just saying
(13:26):
and then, but also you know,many of us, those of us of a
certain age or Gen X may in factbe even though times were
changing, you know for sure, bythen, you know, we may be old
enough to remember beingencouraged, you know, being
encouraged to, you know, sitstill and look pretty and
probably getting pretty good atit, you know.
So, not unless we really foughtthat, or unless we just weren't
in that kind of environment, wealso absorbed those messages of
(13:47):
like, that's not.
You know, I'm the audience.
Cheryl Fischer (13:49):
Wow, I'm fascinated by that because I
think you're right and I don'tthink I ever sat down and
thought I'm the audience, but Ifeel it resonates with me when
you say that.
Like, I feel like maybe that'show I've had interactions with
people and for me, theinteresting thing is I would
(14:09):
love to learn how to be morefunny, and we're going to talk
about that, and I think I amoften funny, but yet I still am
hearing what you're saying, thatmaybe I wasn't conditioned to
take that role.
It's very interesting, yeah.
Lynn Harris (14:25):
Yeah, I mean, there's a million exceptions and
all those things, but I'mspeaking, you know, broadly
speaking, those are the culturalmessages that, in certain
environments, we were raisedwith.
Cheryl Fischer (14:36):
Yeah, and if we take another layer to this,
unleashing our power, I'm alsothinking that in order to be
funny whether it's a formal orjust an informal setting we have
to be self-confident in thefact that whatever we're saying
or doing will be funny andpeople will like it.
So there's got to be someaspect of confidence in there,
(14:57):
which is sort of another layerof power.
Lynn Harris (15:00):
Yeah, yeah, that's true, although the only kind of
nuance I would put on that is, Iwould not view absolute
confidence in one's jokes andsense of humor as a prerequisite
to taking a crack at comedy.
Because you know, for even themost seasoned comedians we all
you know chestnut Even they havestage fright, even they are shy
(15:21):
, even they are nervous, we knowthis right.
And also they never know howlike one joke could land, could
destroy in one place and bomb inanother.
And, by the way, destroying,bomb are the opposite.
So weird, funny, all thoseviolent metaphors for comedy.
But whatever, I wonder who madethose up.
I wonder which window runscomedy?
It's a little bit of a chickenand egg thing.
(15:42):
And what really seasoned.
What good comedy, let's put itthis way, what good comedy
instructors or good comedymentors are apt to say is that
you start with what's funny toyou.
It's not about, and yourconfidence shouldn't come from
whether or not people like you,whether or not does that sound
(16:03):
like good advice for life, butalso whether or not people liked
a joke in any given moment.
Yes, of course you need todevelop your jokes and tweak
them and always be fiddling withthem, based on audience
reaction in the aggregate.
And yes, of course you're doingjokes to get laughs, I mean, of
course, but where you?
But but where you start is nothow do I please the audience?
(16:25):
How do I please the audience?
How do I please the audience?
How do I please the audience?
It's what do I find hilariousand how can I make that connect
with the audience such that theyfind it hilarious too?
So confidence is, of course,part of it, but it's not like
the biggest, it's honestly notthe biggest.
Like, don't wait for theconfidence to do comedy.
Cheryl Fischer (16:42):
Yeah, but what I'm hearing you say, though, is
that it's about trustingyourself and believing that if
you find something funny, thenmaybe somebody else will, and so
there's some layer of selfconfidence in there, for sure.
Lynn Harris (16:55):
Yeah, yeah, I mean at least to get started right.
But the other but again it'slike but also doing it builds
confidence.
So like I'm just the only thingI want to pull out from there
is like, don't wait for theconfidence to show up If you
want to give it a whirl, becauseit, you know it, you get it
from doing it.
Cheryl Fischer (17:11):
Yeah, that's a great point and, as you said a
minute ago, life lesson stopwaiting to feel totally ready
and confident before you dosomething, right.
So let's say that somebody isreally wanting to try this
comedy thing and I'm going tocome back and ask you about the
person who, who kind of justwants to be funny in their life,
(17:33):
but somebody really wants toget started in comedy.
What would you recommend thatthey do to get started?
Lynn Harris (17:43):
Well, obviously, I recommend that they check out a
gold comedy, but before that,but in general, you know, know,
in anywhere, um, I recommendthat they find a place where
they feel comfortable and feelthat they can be themselves if
it's a class, whatever it is, um, and feel that they can truly
be themselves.
One of the reasons that goldexists is often, you know, the,
the often, even the most, eventhe best classes or open mics or
(18:05):
whatever that are available, ifthey are still still tend to be
be, you know, dominated bydudes, and even very nice dudes,
even whatever, but it, you know, if you're, you know, 55, and
you know, are nervous aboutstarting this, you know, even
the nicest bunch may not feellike, okay, these are my people,
(18:25):
you know to you, they might,but they might not.
That's why it's important tofind a place that really, where
you really feel like that, youknow, you, there's a mirror
shining back to you, you know,where people, where you cause
not every audience.
You don't have to make everyonelaugh, not every, even the best
comics don't.
Not everyone is their crowd,you know.
So, if they're not your crowd,that's fine.
You, you, I say, find yourcrowd, whether it's meaning both
(18:47):
your audience and your crew andso find people who you feel
comfortable with, who you feellike you make mistakes in front
of, who you can have your jokesfall flat in front of as you
develop them.
For many people, that is goldcomedy and that's what we're
designed to be, but that's thesecret sauce that we are going
for, and specifically no brovibe.
(19:08):
I mean that's why we'redesigned to welcome anybody,
anybody and everybody, but whatwe don't welcome is a bro vibe,
because that's mostly whatpeople are trying to escape.
So I recommend finding a placewhere you feel comfortable
taking a class.
Taking a class is always what Irecommend to people, always.
It's almost any comedian youtalk to is often where they got
their start.
The other thing I recommend is,if you're not there yet, I kind
(19:31):
of made this up based on theidea of we all know gratitude
journals, and one thing that Isometimes recommend and I
haven't thought of a cute namefor it, yet you can DM me if you
think of one is things in mylife that could be maybe funny
one day.
Journal meaning jotting downwhether it's whatever your jam
is, you know, on your notes appor on a notebook that you carry
(19:53):
with you, like just things thathappen during the day.
That aren't necessarily funnythings, you know, it's not like
I slipped on a banana peel, youknow but like things you notice.
Things you notice Like thesubway voice sounds weird, you
know.
Or just you know, awkwardlybalancing 20, you know, when
you're walking with like 20different bags and also putting
(20:14):
on lipstick or I don't, you know, I don't, I'm just making stuff
up.
They're not cause, they're notfully formed jokes.
They're not jokes, they're justlike things that you notice
during the day that are eitherawkward or challenge, even just
challenging, um, or could beslapstick, sure, or even just
like something funny.
You text to your friend andyou're like wait a minute, that
was kind of funny actually, youknow.
(20:34):
And but my point is mostly theydon't have to be jokes yet and
or even just like stray thoughts.
You know, like coming into thekitchen and being like what if I
just didn't do the dish, youknow, and then, and then just
like write that down and thenlater you come back to it and
then you actually start writinga joke around.
It Know literally what wouldhappen and that's where the
jokes would come from.
Right, literally what wouldhappen.
(20:56):
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
My point is, if you are able tojot down 1, 2, 3, 4, 10 things a
day that are just possiblymaterial, and not trying to be
funny or looking for funny sillythings or just things that just
occur to you, that you evenwrite down with a question mark,
(21:17):
you know, like like me with mycat you know, my cat, literally
like I went to open my lipstickbefore this, I got in the zoom
with you and I noticed that whenmy cat knocked it off the table
, all of the lipstick wound upin the top part.
No, it's also because it'sreally hot.
So, like my lipstick is so hotthat it just melts, you know.
So that's, I don't know, it'snot a joke yet, but but like
(21:39):
lipstick melted in heat, youknow.
But when you go back to it youcan see patterns, you can see
ideas, you can see things that,like, you don't even have to
write jokes yet you could justbe like, oh, if I wanted to
write jokes, I wouldn't have tostart with a blank page.
Cheryl Fischer (21:54):
Yes, I I love this idea and I love that you
are sort of likening it to agratitude journal, because one
of the things that I learned,maybe last year or so, is this
idea of a glimmer.
I don't know if you've heardthe word glimmer.
Lynn Harris (22:09):
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Cheryl Fischer (22:10):
Yeah, and, and what you're describing is kind
of like that, and so I know, ifyou're listening, you've heard
me say glimmer before, but justin case you haven't, it's the
idea of looking for things inyour life, little moments that
make you happy the sunrise orthe whatever, whatever, the
smell of something, and ittrains your brain to look for
(22:31):
more, and so that's what you'resaying.
Yeah, train your brain to lookfor funny or kind of odd things
that happen.
Lynn Harris (22:42):
But what a nice light energy that is in general
and I love that Yep, and as withnoticing glimmers, it
cultivates the habit of noticingthat you in general, and and I
love that Yep, and as withnoticing glimmers, it's the it
cultivates the habit of noticingthat you're noticing, because I
swear to God and I am, I am100% sure that you've said this
If you don't write it down, youthink you're going to remember,
but you will not have to.
(23:03):
You have to write it down.
The only way I'm going toremember the thing about the
lipstick is that we're recordingthis you know, like, like you,
will you?
and you don't even have to be asold as we are to um to to
forget.
You have to write it down.
I don't care what system youuse, I don't care if you use
voice notes, but whatever it is,and the bar has to be for the,
(23:27):
for the comedy't write anythingdown.
The bar is just like anythingthat like could be a thing and
in fact, okay, I'll give youthis gold was gonna.
One of the things that one ofthe swag items we want to make
is a notebook that say on thefront, there's something there.
So I love that.
Yeah, we already have pens thatsay write that down.
And then the notebook would saythere's something there and
(23:47):
like that's it.
There.
Just has to be something there,that's it.
Cheryl Fischer (23:50):
Yes, I see how this is powerful and then the
combination of taking some sortof class and learning how to
then create this into an actualjoke or something that you could
do with it would kind of cometogether.
Lynn Harris (24:07):
Exactly, and yeah, because then you're basically
you're doing your pre homework.
Cheryl Fischer (24:11):
Yeah, yeah, okay .
So let's let's kind of flip itnow to somebody who maybe isn't
necessarily wanting to be on astage and tell jokes and be a
comedian in that way, but wantsto be more funny in their
interactions with people,whether it's work or friends or
(24:32):
who knows what.
What would be your advice tothem?
Lynn Harris (24:36):
Sure.
Well, first of all, one thingthat's a little bit of an
indirect answer is just areminder that when we say comedy
, we say so many things.
We might be saying stand up.
We might be saying writing forlate night.
We might be saying writing,writing sketch.
We might be saying improv.
We might be saying writing forlate night.
We might be saying writing,writing sketch.
We might be saying improv.
We might be saying working forbrands, working in advertising.
Um, you know, three out of fourconsumers want their brands to
(24:57):
be funny.
Which is funny is actuallyfunny.
Interesting because people sayI'm totally on a side note.
People say it actually.
It's not just because it makestheir brands more entertaining.
It actually there's scienceabout this creates trust with a
brand.
When a brand is funny and thesame is true of, like, funny
managers and leaders.
It's not just like they crackedme up, it's partly that, but it
(25:19):
builds trust because you feel akinship, because you sort of
you're in on their joke andthey're in on your joke.
You get each other.
Yes, so I know a lot of comicswho, either on the side or as
their full-time jobs like thisis what they do now write social
for brands.
So even that I would includethat in comedy.
(25:40):
So first of all, for yourlisteners, if you're curious
about what kind of comedy at allin any sort of professional
realm might be something toexplore.
Oh, there's also TV writing.
We talk about TV writing,writing a pilot we have.
We have women writing theirfirst pilots in their fifties,
all the time at gold, and evenselling them and having them go
into production.
So you know.
So there's that.
(26:00):
So, first of all, if you'relike comedy but I don't want to
be on stage, click, click awayfrom podcasts, I'm like no,
there's so many ways, there's amillion things.
I see that, yeah.
Cheryl Fischer (26:10):
Yeah.
Lynn Harris (26:10):
Okay, but your next question, to answer your next
question, to answer it sort of alittle bit backwards for sure,
comedy skills are life skills,for sure, and this is also
science, that learning totraining yourself, whether it be
a professional or or just withthe skills, science, science,
science helps you think faster,write sharper, read a room,
(26:30):
listen better, all those things.
But to turn that around theother way, some of the
components of sort of beingfunny in your daily life come
from listening and reading theroom.
People think it comes fromalways coming up with the
wisecrack, but the ones whoalways come up with the
(26:51):
wisecrack are the ones who arelistening and reading the room
not the ones who walked into aroom writing a joke already.
So, and those wisecracks don'teven always have to be hilarious
, and even if it's, what I liketo say is it's you know, if
you're, I always tell you, like,open a keynote with a joke,
which is very iffy advice to meLike, of course you should, but
like that also makes people openkeynotes with terrible jokes
(27:15):
because they feel pressure tolike write a joke, yeah, and
then it feels awkward and weird.
Yeah, I think people need moreguidance around what that means
and what will work and whatwon't.
But even just like I don't knowin a meeting, like if just it
often comes down to being theone who's willing to say what's
so, like, if it's freezing, sayit's freezing, it doesn't even
have to be a joke.
(27:35):
Like anyone else need mittens,you know, like and P, and then
people kind of relax and theconnect with you and it puts
others at ease.
But it comes from reading theroom, not from walking in there
ready to make them laugh.
So it's actually the bar ispretty low and just the bar is
just somewhere around.
Being willing to say out loudwhat you think might be on other
(27:55):
people's minds.
Yes, people will love you ifyou're the one to like gently
break the awkward silence or saythe thing that everyone's
thinking about, not saying Stufflike that.
So that's one thing I wouldkind of even if you don't do it
right away like watch and listenfor those moments, like
(28:17):
practice reading the room.
And women, honestly, I reallyreally try.
I do not take lightly you knowkind of women are better at this
and and just sort of do sort oflazy or oversimplified.
You know differences betweenmen and women, but it is.
I think it is fair to say thatone of the things we are trained
to do is read a room, like thekind of the chestnut about how,
like you know you walk into aparty and you immediately know
who's who's seeing who, who'sflirting with whom, who's.
(28:39):
You know who's who's in charge,who's like.
We just not like often, notalways, you know we're just it's
fair to say that we're trainedto do that.
So my other point being, likeit's not the heart, so it's to
read a room, it's just.
Then what are you going to say?
That's amusing.
It doesn't have to be funny,but amusing and gives people.
(28:59):
It doesn't have to be apunchline, just an observation.
That is likely what everyone isthinking and feeling at that
moment is a great is a, I think,a pretty safe, a pretty safe
place to start.
Cheryl Fischer (29:10):
And maybe, if that observation is made with a
little bit of I don't even knowhow to describe it, but just
like a little bit of humor, alighter tone or a smile or
whatever, maybe that does it.
Lynn Harris (29:22):
Yeah, or just thinking of like what's?
What's the slightly funny way Icould say this Like, instead of
saying like what I said before,like like okay, see, it's cold
in here, but no one's sayinganything, maybe we should read
everyone's putting on their,putting on their pashminas, and
you know, maybe we should, youknow, but something I mean, you
know.
And so instead of saying likeis everyone else freezing, like
okay, okay, what, how can I saythat with one specific word
(29:44):
that's slightly funnier, likedoes that have any mittens?
You know before, like mittensis funny, but it's not like a
joke.
Cheryl Fischer (29:51):
Right, right, adding humor to what's happening
.
Lynn Harris (29:54):
And just thinking of, like what's one specific
word I could use that heightensthis or you know so little
things like that, little thingslike that I also.
I think it's helpful also tonotice, like when you're with
the people, like, notice how itfeels to be with the people with
whom you're your funniest andnotice, like, what kinds of
jokes are you making?
What gets a laugh?
What do you usually?
(30:14):
What's your vibe on your, onyour group chat?
Like, what's your style?
What do you you know?
What are you?
What's your?
Are you sarcastic?
Are you dry?
Are you silly?
Are you know what's your?
Just kind of notice that that'syou know.
(30:35):
That's how you're funny.
And are there places where youcould?
Are there other contexts thatyou can find to kind of
tentatively and begin totentatively, begin to apply that
same kind of approach, becauseyou already know you got it.
Cheryl Fischer (30:50):
Yes, that's a great point.
Okay, so one of the pieces ofadvice I've gotten before is to
take an improv class.
What are your thoughts?
Lynn Harris (30:58):
Oh yeah, sure, yeah , we offer improv.
In fact, fun fact about Gold,she's also Gen X.
Actually, our improv teachercame to us as a member.
She's a SAG-AFTRA actor, she'san improv instructor and she
came to us because she wanted totry standup.
And now she says she says nowI'm winning awards all over
(31:20):
Louisville where she lives andenvirons and hosting rooms and
staying up late all night and Iblame you, lynn, because now
she's a successful standup.
Anyway, I personally feel morecomfortable with standup and
improv, but so I'm not an experton improv, but improv does do.
All the things they say,absolutely, you know, full, full
stop.
So in terms of getting them outof your head, certainly with
(31:41):
listening all of the things,yeah, you know, certainly.
Yeah, having to listen, havingto build instead of block, you
know, all those things arepeople.
People swear by it.
So I just think my only sort ofpersonal opinion and this is
not a dig on improv at all, soplease, nobody at me.
And again, when we're talkingabout comedy, here we're talking
about all the kinds of comedy.
But there's something really, ifyou go back to comedy and power
(32:03):
, there's just somethinginteresting.
And women, there's somethinginteresting to me about stand-up
and women and the idea of beingalone, not only being, you know
, like being alone on a stagewhere people, especially men,
have to listen to you.
Being alone on a stage wherepeople, especially men, have to
listen to you, ah, and you'reasking me which you are about,
gender and comedy and all thatstuff.
(32:23):
Women also know how to play ona team, true, or at least, to
put it another way, it's fair tosay that that is a thing we are
trained to do.
Yes, love improv, everybody,please, do improv.
But when you're asking me abouthow gender fits in, I think
there's something very.
I just think there's somethingextra juicy not bad about improv
(32:44):
, but extra juicy about thepower of standup, yes, and how
it runs counter to the thingsthat again to oversimplify with
the binary, how it runs counterto the ways that both women and
men have been trained to relateto themselves and each other.
Cheryl Fischer (33:01):
Really interesting yeah.
Lynn Harris (33:03):
But once again, I love improv.
Cheryl Fischer (33:06):
I think she loves improv.
Okay, so you've mentioned it acouple of times, but if someone
is curious about what you'reoffering with Gold Comedy and
wants to find you or connectwith you, how can they do that?
Lynn Harris (33:20):
Oh, thank you for asking.
It's super easy.
We you can visit our website,goldcomedycom G-O-L-D comedy.
You can find us on Instagram,gold comedy.
Same thing.
We're also on Facebook andTikTok.
You can find and YouTube.
You can find all that easilyfrom our home base If you DM.
Here's some.
If you DM me, I'm also LynnHarris on Instagram and also
(33:44):
comedy on Instagram.
If you email me through thewebsite or DM me on social and
tell me you heard me on thispodcast, we'll get you a little
discount on whatever it is youwant to do.
We run mostly by annualmembership, which includes
everything all of the classes,workshops, celebrity speaker
series, open mics, just all.
We also have premium classesthat overlap but work a little
(34:06):
bit differently.
So, depending on what you'recurious about, we'll figure out
some sort of 10% something foryou if you tell me that you
found me through this podcast.
Cheryl Fischer (34:16):
I love it All right, and I'll make sure to put
all that information in theshow notes too, so to make it
easy.
Okay, then the last questionthat I want to kind of wrap up
with, because I'm alwaysimagining somebody's listening
to this while they're doingdishes or folding the laundry or
driving the car or whatever,and they're not going to
remember every single thing,although you can just re-listen,
(34:36):
right, but what is the?
Oh my goodness, I really wantto make sure they remember at
least this one thing.
What is that in your opinion?
Lynn Harris (34:48):
Everybody can be funny.
You're probably already funny.
You don't have to be a certainway before you get funny.
You don't have to be less shy,you don't have to be more
confident.
You just have to be willing torecognize that there is already
material, as we call it, everyminute and every day of your
life, and be curious about howyou might turn that into comedy
(35:12):
that is unique to you, which isreally the only way you can do
it.
Cheryl Fischer (35:16):
Oh, fantastic answer.
I love that.
It's such to me, it's such anempowering concept to think that
we can all be funny in our ownway, and I guess that sort of
circles us right back around tothe way we started this episode
about this whole thing beingempowering.
So that's fantastic.
Lynn, thank you so much forjoining me.
I have loved this conversation.
(35:37):
Thank you so much.
Okay, what I want you to takefrom this episode is absolutely
what Lynn just said.
Anyone can be funny, and thatincludes you.
Yes, and I also want you tokeep in mind this idea of
keeping a list, a journal, anotebook whatever you want to
(35:57):
call it of interesting or maybethere's something to that kind
of things that happen in yourlife, whether you ever do
anything with it or not.
I love this idea so muchbecause sometimes we resist the
idea of a gratitude journal alittle bit, because we think I'm
(36:17):
just going to be writing downthe same thing every day the
sunset was beautiful, the coffeetastes good.
Maybe it becomes a gratitudeslash, funny stuff journal and
we don't want to necessarilycall it that, because I take her
point that it's just these sortof odd little things that
happen that we think maybethere's something there sort of
(36:40):
odd little things that happenthat we think maybe there's
something there.
So I was thinking the other day.
I live in a courtyard oftownhouses and there was a new
family moving in the other dayand all of us inside my house
and probably inside theneighbor's houses, had our noses
basically pressed to the windowbecause we noticed they weren't
moving in with a moving truck,they just had a flatbed off a
(37:03):
pickup truck and a tarp over itand we were trying to figure out
who was moving in and wecouldn't pick from the people
who it was.
I might write that down on mylist, because what would I do
with it, I don't know, but whenI look back it will amuse me.
And even if that's all I everdo with this list, that's
powerful.
We are taking the conversationfurther in Patreon Lynn and I
(37:27):
took a little bit more time toreally go into detail on the how
of going forward with this.
So make sure that you arehanging with us in the Midlife
Pivot Patreon community.
It's patreoncom slashmindyourmidlife.
You can grab the link in theshow notes.
I'll see you there and you'llget to hear the rest of that
(37:49):
discussion and then, whereveryou are listening, if you would
tap the five stars.
That would be amazing.
If you're listening on Apple,if you would take a moment and
give a review.
Those reviews help tell Applethat more people might be
interested in hearing thispodcast, and that is so amazing.
I am thankful for every singlereview that comes in and, in the
(38:14):
meantime, keep rememberingmidlife is your time to slow
down, notice your life, what'sgoing on around you, what's
going on in your head, andcreate something amazing.
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