April 4, 2025 • 43 mins
Meet Mike Neeson, a busy family man, husband, and father of two. In 2008, he received a stage IV colorectal cancer diagnosis. Mike shares his journey of peaks and valleys: over sixty weeks of chemotherapy, numerous setbacks, and overcoming the odds.
He is a consummate thriver and patient at our M Health Fairview Masonic Cancer Center, one of the nation’s leading comprehensive cancer centers.
“I can’t say enough good things about the Masonic Cancer Center. The left hand always knows what the right hand is doing, it’s so seamless. I enjoy sharing my story and trying to give people inspiration.”
For more info on the Masonic Cancer Center or Masonic Charities, please contact: reed.endersbe@mnmasonic.org
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hi everyone.
Welcome back.
It's another episode ofMinnesota Masonic Histories and
Mysteries.
My guest today is Mike Neeson.
He's been married to his wifePatty for 32 years, has two
sons, Nick and Ben that are 28and 26 years old, respectively.
Mike was born in St.
Paul and moved to Stillwaterwhen he was five years old.
(00:21):
Attended school here locally andthen graduated from the
University of Wisconsin RiverFalls in 86.
Mike worked for Anderson Windowsand patio doors for 30 years,
retiring just a few years ago.
A big fan of golfing, bikeriding, playing tennis, skiing,
a pontoon enthusiast, and sometravel in there too.
(00:42):
A stage four colorectal cancerdiagnosis in 2008 when he was
45, has kept him very involvedin volunteering with the
University of Minnesota insupport of cancer patients.
Mike and his wife, along withanother couple, have raised
approximately one and a halfmillion dollars with 100% of
these funds.
Going to colorectal research atthe U of M Masonic Cancer
(01:05):
Center.
Mike, welcome.
Well, thanks for having me heretoday.
I appreciate it.
Before we talk about your cancerjourney, tell us a bit more
about you.
You're from this region,retiring not terribly long ago.
Yeah, I, I grew up here in theMidwest, as you said.
Grew up in St.
Paul, uh, moved to still arewhen I was, uh, very young, uh,
probably about five years old.
(01:26):
had a great life there, youknow, uh, enjoyed the, the local
schools and activities there.
as you said, uh, went over toWisconsin for, uh, uh, undergrad
school then, uh, started shortlyafter that at Anderson Windows
and my career started out in NewJersey.
When you, when you sign up at.
Anderson for a sales job,typically they're gonna send you
(01:46):
somewhere else, uh, in thecountry.
So New Jersey was, uh, where Iwas, uh, sent and being a
Midwest kid, you know, thatreally changed.
Uh, how was that?
Um, you know, I, I was single atthe time.
so the thing I really likedabout it, there was a lot of
other, uh, single Anderson salesreps, guys, you know, typically
under 35.
(02:08):
And, uh, you know, the thing inthe Midwest here.
Uh, you know, in two hoursyou're not very far.
You're down to Mankato, you'reup to Duluth.
You know, from where I lived inNew Jersey, in two hours I could
be in New York, dc, Baltimore,Philadelphia.
So, you know, I appreciatedthat.
And, uh, you know, being singleout there and I like to play
golf and my friend, so almostevery weekend, you know, we'd
(02:29):
just take turns, uh, you know,showing up at somebody else's
place to play golf for theweekend.
So.
you know, it was enjoyablethere, but I, you know, I don't
think I would've wanted to raisekids and the family, um, you
know, they talk about East Coastand it's the fast pace of life.
I always thought that was alittle ironic because to me
everything was really slow.
(02:50):
If I went to the bank, there was12, 12 people ahead of me, so it
was slow If I went to thegrocery store, you know, it was
slow.
The post office, whatever, youknow, traffic, obviously.
Yeah.
So, you know, they talk aboutthe pace of life, but I, I
always thought that was alittle, ironic because in many
facets it's not fast.
I had a work transfer to Bostonfor a couple years, and we came
(03:12):
back from that thinking Boston,New York, great places to visit.
But living, I had theopportunity to come back to
Minneapolis, St.
Paul and had a whole new, arenewed appreciation for coming
back to the Midwest.
Yeah, me, me too.
I, I'm really glad I spent a fewyears out there.
but this is where I was born andraised and I, I think, you know,
kind of, uh, my personality and,and some of my interest, you
(03:34):
know, uh, align a little betterhere in the Midwest.
How crowded was the sales marketout there to be a new guy?
A rookie, you're single.
Was that a tough market to crackor were there opportunities
everywhere?
Uh, and Anderson now is, is uh,is pretty much nationwide, but
you know, it's 130 3-year-oldcompany now.
For a long time, it was Midwestand East coast.
(03:56):
Um, along the shore out therewhere I was in New Jersey, you
could literally find 50 homes ina row that were Anderson
windows.
Really.
One that wasn't 40 Anderson is,is kind of out there.
It's like Coke or Pepsi orwhatever you'd say.
It's, it's synonymous withWindows.
People would say, That's whatthey think of for Windows.
(04:16):
Now if you're in the Southwest,it's changed a little bit now.
but when I was out there, it wasa very prominent name.
so and, and it wasn't a salesjob, like you think you're going
house to house or anything likethat.
We worked through distributors,so all it was really was working
with your distributors who hadsalespeople who called on the
lumberyards.
Then the lumberyards, you know,deal with the contractors and
(04:37):
architects and things like that.
So it was really, uh, kind of amultiplication of efforts and as
much of a sales job, I wouldsay.
It was more of a, a training andeducation and, um, you know,
helping the people, who werereally dealing with more of the
frontline builders andarchitects, contractors, things
like that.
As you were recapping that, inmy mind I was thinking about
(04:58):
what it would've been like to godoor to door and have the door
slammed in your face in the oldNew Jersey, New York cliche.
So the arrangement of havingdistributor and whatnot had to
make life a whole lot easier.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You know, but the, and again,this is just my opinion, right?
It was to, to make friends outthere wasn't real easy.
They're a little cliquey, youknow?
(05:19):
but once you made friends, theywere pretty good friends.
They, you know, once you couldget in, they were pretty tight,
pretty loyal.
And, uh, I, I used to kidpeople, I said, you know, I was
about the only middle classoutta 18 million people living
there.
You know, being from the Midwesthere, I had never seen that kind
of wealth.
And on the other hand, I hadnever seen that kind of poverty.
And, you know, I used to jokehere in the Midwest, uh, I'll
(05:41):
just say, in the Twin cities,70% of the people are middle
class.
You know, you have 10 or 15% ateach end.
But out there, to me it was theopposite, you know?
Yeah.
It was extreme.
Extreme wealth along the shore,some of the suburbs of
Philadelphia, you know, NewYork, things like that.
And then, like I said, in Camdenand parts of Philly, the poverty
(06:04):
I had never seen, even if youtalk about North Minneapolis.
Oh, it, it doesn't hold acandle.
No, not even close.
You see the full spectrum likeyou described of both and then
everything in between.
No doubts.
How many years were you outthere before you returned to the
Midwest?
Uh, about two and a half years.
Okay.
And then when along that journeydid you meet Patty?
Um, shortly after I came backand, uh, um, one of my friends,
(06:28):
uh, and one of her friends setus up on a, a blind date.
So many blind date stories andI'm, let me guess, were you
reluctant to do it?
Were you thinking, oh God,what's this gonna be like?
No, no.
I'm, I'm super outgoing.
I'm always open for.
You know, uh, and as we talktoday, I'll give you some
examples of, of things you'd gothat that's not what a normal
(06:48):
person would be comfortabledoing.
Two sons, Nick and Ben.
I believe we said they were 28and 26.
Mm-hmm.
I'm sure that's gone fast.
Uh, I, I can't believe it.
I was talking to a friend ofmine yesterday.
We had a retirement party for,uh, one of my coworkers and, uh,
you know, we were talking aboutour kids and stuff and they
both, uh, graduated from theUniversity of Minnesota in
(07:09):
Duluth.
And it seems like they werejust.
Starting there and we were justdropping'em off.
And now actually they've bothbeen done for years and years,
you know.
Wow.
And so, yeah, it, it's crazy howfast, you know, from when they
were, you know, they were both,uh, super involved with, uh,
baseball when they were young.
And I remember going to all thefields and the games and, you
know.
(07:29):
Every single weekend.
My wife had had one directionwith one to Apple Valley.
I'd had, you know, the otherdirection up to Forest Lake or
something with the other, and itwas a ton of fun.
But it sure doesn't seem likethat was probably now 15 years
ago.
You know, and I, I can't believeit.
The exhausting schedules I thinkare continually getting worse
for parents.
(07:49):
I dunno if worse is the rightword.
Yeah.
But more hectic.
The, the tournaments that areyear round, the travel.
Oh yeah.
When you, it's when, when I wasin school, you know, e
everything was pretty much free.
You know, I played in the golfteam, I played tennis.
Um, now, you know, like yousaid, the time commitments in
the year round and the expenses,Unbelievable.
that.
A friend of mine has an8-year-old eight.
(08:10):
Relatively new to hockey.
Mm-hmm.
And there are tournaments inChicago in travel and when, when
I was a kid, it was a seasonalthing, basketball, hockey.
And you just picked it up again.
Well, I guess that's aging me.
Aging us.
Yeah.
Because now it's a year-roundthing.
Oh yeah.
Everyone's focused on making itto the big time and it, I can't
even fathom having kids.
(08:30):
In that crucible of activitybetween schoolwork and
extracurriculars and hopefullysome other, just hobbies in
general.
Yeah.
When I played baseball, youknow, I think most of my games
were noon or one, there were noparents there.
If dad, if dad showed up, it wasa nice surprise.
Mm-hmm.
But never expected.
Right.
Sometimes he'd sneak out in Juneor early July, and you're right,
(08:51):
that was just glove over thehandlebar and away we went in
that little pack of bikes andGod, what great memories.
So in 2008.
You received some devastatingnews, to say the least.
To say the least.
Was that a phone call or whatled to that appointment that you
went in to see a physician?
Yeah, I, you know, um, I wasdiagnosed in, uh, September of
(09:14):
oh eight, but, uh, my symptomsreally started early in 2008,
and I was in perfect health, andI'm telling you, I'm super
active, super involved, youknow, physical activity.
Sure.
Things like that.
but in, uh, spring of, of 2008,I started to have some unusual,
I'll just say.
Stomach issues, you know,everything from gas and kind of
bloating and, you know, uh,digestive problems, things like
(09:37):
that.
So I went into my local and Ididn't even have a GP think of
this.
I didn't even have a doctor'cause I hadn't really been in
other than maybe for a physicalor something, since I was in
college.
Really?
Mm-hmm.
You know, playing sports.
And, uh, so I went in, he, youknow, I explained my symptoms
and he said, I, I really, reallythink you're based on everything
you say, you're, you're probablylactose intolerant.
(09:59):
You know, what do I know, right?
I'm a sure window guy.
Yeah.
And, uh, and you're healthyotherwise.
Oh, I, yeah.
It's not like there's someobvious thing of, oh, you should
eliminate this or do Right.
And I wasn't really, you know, Iwasn't fatigued or tired or
anything.
It was just these stomach issueskind of.
So I changed my diet for a fewmonths and it didn't get any
better.
So I went back in, he said, tellme your symptoms again.
Remind me, you know, and so I gothrough everything again.
(10:22):
And he said, uh.
I think it's gluten.
I think you have gluten issues.
So I changed my diet again a fewmore months.
Right.
And, but now it's midsummer and,uh, and I'm not getting better.
I'm actually getting worse,these symptoms.
And now, I have blood in mystool.
Oh boy.
So that's, you know, kind of aripe, pretty serious.
So that gets your attention.
(10:44):
And, uh, so I was 45.
And so he said at that time,the, the protocol was really
like 50 for.
Uh, to have a colonoscopy.
So he said, Hey, you know,you're gonna have a colonoscopy
in a few years.
Let's just do it now.
And so I went in and sureenough, I remember waking up
outta the sedation and he showsme a photo and he says, do you
know what this is?
(11:04):
You know, I'm kind of like, I'llgo out in a limb and say.
It's my colon.
You're still under a littleDilaudid.
A little, a little.
Yeah.
Verse said di you know, so Isaid, you know, it's, I assume
it's my colon.
He said, yep.
And he goes, he points to a spoton.
He goes, do you know what thisis?
And I said, no.
He said.
That's, that's a mass, a tumor,and we did a biopsy, but we
(11:25):
believe it's malignant by, youknow, our experience.
And he said it's, you know, likethree centimeters, it's over an
inch.
It's very large.
Mm-hmm.
You know, and so to your point,my, my life changed in a day,
you know, in just one.
Day.
And uh, you know, I was reallyfortunate when people talk
about, you know, sometimes themedical system here, you know,
(11:48):
in the health system in the usbut, um, I spent a fair amount
of time in Canada for one of thecompanies.
Okay.
You know, we had acquired, so Ihad friends there and I, you can
say, yeah, things are.
You know, maybe free up there,but the time and the delays, you
know, here from when I wasdiagnosed, uh, and then I had
all my treatment at the U.
I was diagnosed on the 18th ofSeptember, and by the first week
(12:12):
of October I had already had PETscans, CT scans, MRIs, and I, in
that first week I had alreadystarted my chemo and radiation.
Really?
So really from two weeks fromwhen I was diagnosed, I had not
only been into the U for.
You know, to see an oncologist,colorectal surgeon, urology
surgeon, and I was alreadystarting my treatment, all of
(12:34):
that in two weeks.
It's unheard of.
Amazing.
So in, in that diagnosis, I.
Was a stage four mm-hmm.
Colorectal cancer.
What, what does that, what did,how did that conversation go?
What does that sound like with adoctor?
Not good.
So, you know, again, I was a layperson and so I, I go in and I
had one of the best surgeons in,in the Midwest, and I, I can't
(12:56):
say enough about, DavidRothenberger, he's renowned, all
over the u in the Midwest.
And, uh, and it couldn't havebeen better to deal with.
And he, he had said to me.
He had looked over all my scans,imaging.
He said, you know, this is stagefour.
And while I'm a late person, Iknow there's only, there's no
stage five and I know four isworse than three than two, you
(13:17):
know, and so I said, uh.
Well, what's that mean?
Tell me more.
And he said, well, it'smetastasized to your lungs, you
know, and then some of my otherorgans in my, my abdomen.
And, so real quick, it gotreally serious.
Yeah.
You know, it's one thing to getthe diagnosis, but then to hear
that it's metastasized and it'sspread.
(13:38):
I went down, um, for a secondopinion to the male.
when I speak, I, I say, it'skinda like a car.
They, they weren't callouseddown there, but they're kinda
like the radiator shot, thetransmission shot, the engine
shot.
You know, the, they're kindalike, I, I don't know if it's
worth.
Maybe we need a new car.
You know, I'm not sure it'sright, you know, financially
(13:59):
prudent to try to, you know, fixthis and, and so, but, um, Dr.
Rothenberger was great.
He said, you know, uh, didn'tmake any promises.
but he was always, you know,encouraging.
My oncologist over there.
I can't say enough about, um,when I got back from the Mayo
with some less than encouragingnews, I asked him, and I didn't
(14:20):
tell him what the Mayo had said,but, uh, I said, you know, what
are my odds?
And he said, Mike, unless I canfind a whole pile of 45-year-old
non-smokers, non-diabetic,really healthy people goes, I, I
don't know what your odds are,but he said, and I, I always
mention this when I speak, hesaid, but I'll tell you this,
Mike.
He goes, at the end of the day.
(14:41):
Odds are zero or a hundred'causeit can't be 30% alive.
And that really, that reallykind of stuck with me.
And from that point on I waskind of like, alright, you know,
we will give it everything wegot.
Mm-hmm.
You know, and my, uh, actuallyfor stage four, uh, colorectal,
uh, cancer patients, even todaywhen I was diagnosed, the five
year survival rate was about 6%.
(15:04):
Which, you know, it's one out of17.
Right.
That's not.
Not too encouraging.
now, today, um, 16 years later,uh, it's about 12%.
So it's still, it's still low.
You know, colon cancer is one ofthese unusual super
preventative, right?
You're going for yourcolonoscopy.
All this starts as a polyp.
If they have the polyp, theydon't even tell you, right?
(15:26):
Come back in two weeks.
They just take it off right inthere.
Do it.
Yeah.
So it's.
In a way it's really, reallypreventative.
'cause there aren't many othercancers where you could, really
get that early detection that,that easy.
I mean, you know, without, uh,without a, a lot of involvement.
But, uh, you know, so I started,uh, you know, all my chemo and
(15:48):
radiation, the, the fall of oheight.
Um, and fast.
It was just about immediateafter your diagnosis.
Oh yeah.
They got me in, you know, rightaway and, uh, so I ended up
actually, that fall goingthrough, um, 40, uh, radiation
treatments Monday throughFriday.
40 40 for eight weeks.
Oh yeah.
Monday through Friday.
Eight weeks, every single day.
(16:09):
Um, and the chemo, and then theygave me.
December off, you know, that wasto kind of recover.
They had already told me surgerywould be in early January, so I
had December off, but, um, hadwent back in for another, uh,
PET scan, MRI, things like that.
I was getting CT scans, uh,pretty frequently, but the tumor
(16:29):
had shrunk by about 50% Reallywhen I went in, in early
December.
And, you know, I remember askingRothenberg, he, he said, that's
very encouraging.
I said, I, I get that and, butit's gonna come out anyway.
Why?
Again, as a lay person, I'mlike, why does that matter?
And he, he said, well, you know,if, if the large tumor is being
(16:50):
impacted, all these things onthe periphery, these microscopic
cells, there's a good chancethose are being impacted.
And so that, you know, madesense to me.
And so, Then it, uh, I, and Iknew as soon as I went out
because my tumor was extremelylow in my colon, actually, on
day one, he said, you're gonnahave a colostomy.
(17:12):
Yeah.
Not there's a chance price.
No.
100, not the 99, 100 because itwas so low.
He said, when we take that massout and then um, some of the
surrounding tissue, So I knewthat, but you know, that didn't
really bother me.
I didn't think about that much.
I'll fall.
Because I was really kind of inthe battle with the chemo and
(17:32):
the radiation Sure.
And, and things like that.
But then in December, right nowI'm not, I'm done with the chemo
and radiation.
And so I start thinking aboutthat and I don't know anyone
with a colostomy, you know?
Yeah.
If, if all of a sudden tomorrowyou were diagnosed with
diabetes, you, you know, whetherpeople with that and maybe
somebody with a pump and you canask questions, whatever.
But, uh, but I didn't and so, Iwas kind of in denial a little
(17:56):
bit.
I thought, well, maybe becausethis tumor shrunk, maybe when
they actually get in there, theywon't have to take as much and I
won't end up with it.
You know, I was kind of, andthat's not my nature to kind of
be in denial, but in, in thatcase, I was, and so late
December, I go in and they do.
What's called marking you wherethe stoma is gonna be.
Okay.
You know, kind of in your lower,under your belt line, you know,
(18:18):
but they mark me twice left andright and I'm like, well maybe
they, until they're in there forthe surgery, they won't know if
they're gonna put it on the leftor the right side.
Yeah.
So I go in on January 6th and,uh, Dr.
Rothenberger, who again thinkthe world of says, this is Dr.
Sean Elliott.
(18:39):
He's gonna take out yourbladder.
Oh boy.
And I'm like.
Humor me, kind of like, why, whywould we do that?
You know, I don't have bladdercancer or anything, but what had
happened is through those 40radiation treatments, which
probably helped save my life,but it's not without collateral
damage.
Yeah.
And so it fried, um, what arecalled, um, my ureters And so he
(19:03):
said, and he wasn't, he, hemeant this in the nicest way.
He said, if, if you're used, ifyou get used to one bag, you'll
get used to two.
And so I literally said to him,I said, whatever type of
sedation you're gonna give me ina few minutes, I said, you gimme
something right now.
But he made the right callbecause you know, I've been a
(19:26):
double ostomy patient here nowfor, It'll be 17 years almost.
Yeah.
And I'm, I'm telling you, andit's all right.
Perspective and how you handlethings.
I, I'm telling you, it's justnot a big deal.
It's just not.
Yeah.
You know, I, I golf, I ski, I doeverything.
I travel.
Um, and I tell people,'cause Ideal with a lot of ostomy
patients pre and post-surgery.
(19:47):
Really?
And I tell people, if you thinkit's gonna be a big deal.
It's gonna be a big deal.
Mm-hmm.
If you don't, you know, peopledeal with all kinds of things.
Right.
but sometimes paralysis and, uh,you know, amputations and Sure.
All the things people deal with.
And then people go, oh, Icouldn't deal with that.
Yeah, you could.
Mm-hmm.
(20:07):
So in 2008 you received the newsstage four colorectal.
You go through this regimen, 40sessions of chemo, the December
off to get lost in yourthoughts.
Here.
Here we are though.
Fast forward 16, almost 17 yearslater, that is defying some
serious odds.
Oh, a absolutely, because, Youknow, after, so I was in the
(20:28):
hospital 24 days, you know, gohome, get used to my new body.
Right?
You, you have, you know,urostomy, mm-hmm.
Colostomy, things like that.
I.
and then, you know, I go backin, see my oncologist a little,
you know, few weeks later and hesays, Hey, we're gonna start
another 26 weeks of chemo.
Oh my God.
So that gets me down to, youknow, around the 4th of July.
(20:48):
And you know what, Reid, the,the chemo never bothered me too
much.
The radiation is brutal.
especially depending where youget it.
I, I'm not saying breast canceror something would be easier,
but you know, if you're getting.
Radiation right in your rectumeffect.
I, I, early on, um, it was sopainful.
(21:10):
I was kidding.
My radiologist, Dr.
Chen, I said, uh.
This isn't gonna be a problem.
'cause I said I'm done eating.
I, I would because I'm like, ifnothing goes in, nothing comes
out.
Right.
And she, she says, that's notrealistic.
I said, I realize that.
I'm just joking.
But anyway, so I go through theother 26 weeks of chemo.
Um, so that gets me to thesummer of 2009.
(21:33):
Um, I'm not working during thistime.
My employer couldn't have beenbetter.
I, I had a pretty big job.
they.
Back filled it.
But when I came back in Octoberof that year, it was my job.
It wasn't like, Hey, you know,we have a project to put you on.
Your job's gone.
I mean, they, they, and theywere checking in with me all the
time.
Couldn't have been better.
But, so that summer, um, Ifinished the chemo in July.
(21:55):
I get back to, to golfing alittle bit, which is a big deal
for me.
And so my friends, who I haven'tseen in a long time said, uh,
you know, like, how's your golfgame?
I said, it's fabulous.
I said, I haven't hit a bad shotyet.
And they're like.
What do you mean?
You know, what's your deal?
And I, and I, you know, ifyou're a golfer, I'm like, it
can go in the pond, it can goout of bounds, it can go in the
bunker.
(22:16):
There are no bad shots.
Right.
It, it's all perspective.
And, uh, so then I went back to,uh, work in October, uh,
full-time, you know, in October,about one year later.
Um, yeah.
Um, about exactly from what, I'msorry.
And you know what Rothenbergertold me?
He goes, this is gonna be a oneyear deal.
And it literally.
It was a one year deal, butthen, you know, we had talked
(22:38):
about being stage four, so didmetastasize right away, even at
my early diagnosis, um, intoboth lungs.
I.
And at that time they weren'ttoo concerned about,'cause
they're just trying to deal withthe colon cancer.
Right?
Sure.
but now, you know, I go back towork in, October of oh nine.
have a really good, you know,two years.
(22:58):
I'm going in every, quarter,every three months for checkups,
things like that.
things are okay.
But then in the fall, two yearsfrom then in the fall of 2011.
I got a cough and I can't shakeit.
And it's, it's brutal.
And so I go in early.
I had just for cancer patientsthe first two years you go in
(23:19):
for CT scans, blood work, thingslike that, every 12 weeks, every
quarter.
But if you can make it twoyears, then they move you to six
months.
So I had just gotten onto my sixmonths, but I got this cough and
I'm not gonna wait.
I'm only two, three months into,you know, the six months.
So I go in early.
And they said, sure enough, oneof the lobes, one of the tumors
(23:42):
in one of my lobes had startedto really grow.
And so they said, we gottaremove that.
So I go in for what's called thelobectomy, and you have three
lobes in your right, two in yourleft.
And uh, I was, when I wasdiagnosed, I had five tumors,
one in every lobe.
(24:03):
If they were all in one, you,you know, you could, mine were
all spread out.
So that was why the mail gave mesuch a dire prognosis.
so I have it removed and insteadof a 24 day hospital stay read,
I literally go in on a Fridaymorning.
I am out Saturday night,compared to what I'm used to,
I'm, I'm like, this was.
(24:24):
Pretty easy, right?
Sure.
So, and it, it really wasn't toopainful or anything, you know?
so it's a couple weeks afterthat, I'm back home and I go see
my oncologist, he says, how's itgoing?
I'm like, you know, it's not toopainful.
I said, I was kind of in andout, literally like 36 hours.
Mm-hmm.
and he said, well, I'm, I'm gladit went well because.
We're gonna start another 26weeks of chemo.
(24:48):
So now this is gonna be 62weeks.
And he said, plus we're going todo two types of chemo.
We're doing the oral, what'scalled Xeloda, and then we're
also gonna do an IV infusioncalled Oxaliplatin, which you
wouldn't wish on your worstenemy.
Really?
It's you.
You can't even imagine.
It's highly, highly metallic.
So everything, oh yeah.
(25:09):
Uh.
Feels cold and I was taking it,think of this in the winter, but
you can't really even drink, uh,room temperature water.
'cause let's say that's 65degrees.
Mm-hmm.
That feels incredibly cold.
so, you know, I went months andit's just tea.
Think of this warm ensure, likee everything.
You can't have anything that'sremotely.
(25:31):
Yeah.
so I, I get through, I'm almostthrough that 26 weeks.
I.
And, uh, which puts you at achemo schedule now of over a
year if you're Oh, yeah, yeah.
Adding the weeks out now.
Yeah.
62 weeks.
I did.
I did 10, 10 weeks in thebeginning, then 26, then another
26.
But before I can finish thatsecond 26 weeks, I start getting
(25:52):
brutal kidney pain.
And so I, I go in and I see Dr.
Elliot, my urology surgeon, andwhat has happened, I, I
mentioned earlier, everybody,for the most part, right?
You have two kidneys and youhave what are called ureters.
They're like straws that drainyour kidney down to your
bladder.
And although I don't have thebladder, I got the, the ureters,
the.
(26:12):
Again, picture'em like straws,but what has happened from all
the radiation and it took awhile, but I have what are
called strictures or kinks in astraw.
So if you think about a straw,instead of it being clear, you
know, there, there's kinks init.
And so the urine can't really,I.
Come out of your kidneys anddrain through these straws, you
(26:33):
know, seamlessly, becausethere's kind of kinks if you
think of a hose or a straw.
So Dr.
Elliot explains, he says, we'regonna put in stents, you know,
to, to open these ureters and,and these.
And I, I swear Reed, I golfedwith a couple guys and I worked
with a couple guys who had heartstents, but obviously I've never
(26:54):
seen one.
But I remember sitting in Dr.
Elliot's office and he says,we're gonna put in stints, you
know, to keep this open so theurine can flow through.
I swear, Reed, even though Ihaven't seen one, I take my
fingers and I hold'em like this,like an inch apart.
And I say, I get the concept.
He looks at me and goes, I don'tthink you do.
(27:15):
He said, these are gonna be 16inches long.
Oh my God.
And he said, we're gonna change'em every 70 days for the rest
of your life.
How were you maintaining anylevel of.
Optimism of, okay, well this isthe next, this is the next
(27:35):
chapter.
This is the next part of theto-do list.
It, you know, part of it.
How, how do you part of It'sjust the way I was wired.
Okay.
I, I, I, I, you know, I, Inever, and I, I'm not boasting,
but I, I never, once through thewhole thing ever was like, why
me?
Or, you know, I, I wish I had myold life back.
'cause that was just kind of nota good use of time or energy
(27:58):
'cause it was more always aboutgoing forward and, and again,
I'm just kind of wired as apretty optimistic person.
My friends, like I said, I playa ton of golf and I.
my golf game, right?
Everybody got strong points,weak points.
You know, my strong point is, isputting be, and, and they're,
you know, and some of it'smental, and I say I actually,
and obviously I don't, but I, Ithink every 15, 18, I don't care
(28:21):
if 22 foot put, I actuallybelieve I'll make everyone.
I don't.
But it's that mentality, youknow, uh, of that.
But with the stint, so if youthink about now, it's been.
Because I didn't have thoseright away.
It took two years.
So it's been about 14 years.
I've had the stints.
Now I go in, I'll go in a weekfrom Monday here on the 14th.
So I go in every 55 days here,so it's been 14 years.
(28:44):
So I go in seven times a year.
first of all, your level ofoptimism is.
I've never heard a story likethis.
And then to be in the face ofsuch adversity, just dealing
with it.
I, I was listening to adifferent podcast recently and
the line of the, theencouragement of the guest was,
(29:06):
I.
How do we maintain indifferenceto things that we can't control?
And while Sure, being a happywarrior and being an optimist,
we, someone could set out to dothat, but what you've been
through would've taken down amere mortal How was your
experience at the Masonic CancerCenter?
I know Dr.
Rothenberger was a pivotalperson along this journey.
(29:29):
Who else?
What else?
I'd love to hear more about whatthat Yeah, it's interesting.
You know, I've referred a lot ofpeople over the years, you know,
to, to the U in the MasonicCancer Center there.
and I was just telling a story,um, the other day, um, to a
patient I was working with.
you know, again, not in amedical sense, but just in a
support sense.
Mm-hmm.
(29:50):
You know, it's a very, verylarge place and I had a urology,
surgeon, oncologist,radiologist, you know,
colorectal surgeon.
The, the thing that's amazingover there, Reed, very large
people in different buildings.
The left hand always knows whatthe right hand's doing.
Really ne never once in the 16years I've been.
Dealing over there has somebodysaid, well, I don't have those
(30:11):
test results.
I don't have those bloodresults, or, I can't see that
scan or image.
I, I mean, never once.
It's so seamless.
I, and you know, my local, um,hospital clinic, I.
it's one, 100th of the size and,and something's always getting
lost.
Sure.
Or somebody doesn't know, orthey can't find something.
I don't know.
Yeah.
You know, but I, I can't sayenough good things about the u
(30:33):
and and that's why we, you know,um, ended up kind of in a
philanthropic, charity.
Uh, we've been super supportive,you know, trying to give back.
Yes.
Um, not only, uh, financially,but I've probably spoken with,
I'm just gonna guess.
200 plus, patients, eithercancer or ostomy patients.
(30:53):
A lot of ostomy patients.
you know.
So they'll refer a lot of peopleto me.
again, not in a medical sense,but you know, how do I deal with
this?
How do I, you know, what, can Ieat?
Can I swim when I travel?
It's, uh, I, I get a lot offulfillment trying to, uh, help
people with some of theiranxiety and fear.
(31:13):
know, people when they, whenthey don't know, they speculate.
And typically when youspeculate, it's to the negative.
That's where the trouble begins.
And.
This podcast has a wide reach,and not all of our listeners are
just regional or even within theUS only, but for our listeners,
it may not be familiar.
The Masonic Cancer Center at theUniversity of Minnesota is one
(31:35):
of the nation's leadingcomprehensive cancer centers, M
Health Fairview, combining ahistory of science and discovery
with a commitment to deliveringpersonalized cancer care for
every single family they serve.
And this is a partnership thatallows them at mHealth Fairview
to provide the most advancedtreatment options in early phase
(31:58):
clinical trials.
We're recording this in April ofthis year.
In a few weeks we have ourannual Masonic Cancer Center
dinner, and over the lasthandful of years, we've had the
privilege of hosting and hearingfrom Dr.
Douglas Yee.
He's a medical oncologist.
He specializes in breast cancer.
Dr.
Jen Poynter, she's a professorof epidemiology, clinical
(32:20):
research.
She's overseeing the 10,000family study, which is an
incredible cohort study going onthat is in this region, not just
limited to Minnesota.
Last year, Dr.
Jacob Toler spoke at the MasonicCancer Center.
He's in pediatrics, blood andmarrow transplant, cellular
therapy, and it was very specialto hear him say.
(32:43):
That they're able to do the workthat they do at the Masonic
Cancer Center, the Children'sHospital, because of the Masons,
because of the free Masons ofMinnesota and of across our
country that have contributedto, to this endeavor.
It's very special for theMasons, especially in Minnesota,
to feel as though they have apart of all of these tremendous
(33:06):
things that are happening,especially at the Masonic Cancer
Center in the.
Diligent search for a cure andfor research breakthroughs that
are happening at a verybreakneck pace.
From what we're, from what weare told.
Mm-hmm.
In my journeys, I visit a lot oflodges.
I visit with business leadersabout how they can contribute to
(33:26):
Masonic Cancer Center or, or anyone of the number of facilities
we have.
And you, you have a charityspecifically that you and your
wife are I.
And one and one other couple.
Yeah.
Take the lead on.
Tell us more about that.
well, one of our friends, helost his, uh, wife, uh, Danez
and Coates, uh, to colon cancer,uh, back in 2015.
(33:48):
we were friends and, um.
hers was very, very aggressive.
and unfortunately for her itwas, it was a short, um, a short
battle.
But, um, before she passed, shestarted, um, a research fund.
And, uh, I.
The two couples, my wife and I,and then, Dick and and his new
(34:09):
wife, uh, Lyne have, uh, we'vecontinued that on and, uh, with,
you know, the help of the u youknow, we've been very successful
in, in raising money.
We have a big annual, Boat ride,paddle, boat, ride in the St.
Croix every year.
and I think we've done it nownine years.
And as you say, like Dr.
Y has attended each year, the,the, the faculty at the U has
(34:30):
been super supportive.
I.
Of, you know, our charity and,and you know, you could say,
well, sure they're getting allthe proceeds, but I think it's
more than that.
They, they're very engaged in,in the work we're doing.
Um, and it's important work, youknow, um, But a lot of the work
we've done and the money we'veraised, we refer to it as seed
(34:51):
money.
So, you know, some people think,you know that the NIH or the U
just has a big pile of money andsomebody has an idea and you
know, and it gets funded thatthat's not how it works.
And so the money we raise, a lotof times they might take 50,
$75,000 and they'll use it in aproof of concept.
(35:14):
And sometimes that bears fruit,right?
Sometimes it doesn't.
But in some of the cases whereit has.
The D-O-D-N-I-H some of these,have ended up giving one to even
$3 million grants off of, uh,projects that we helped fund in
their infancy.
So it's, it's very importantwork, to get started.
(35:36):
Or a lot of that work neverwould because, uh, some of the
labs we support at the u andsome of the research, they, they
simply wouldn't have funding ifit wasn't for groups like us.
and I really appreciate what youdo in supporting, say a new
patient who, someone's going tobe undergoing a new regimen of
treatment, or have an operation,have a procedure where obviously
(36:00):
nerves and stress are at an alltime high.
And what you do, it sounds liketo mentor, coach, help give them
some affirmation that You'regonna come out of this just fine
and it's gonna be okay.
I, that's gotta, the peace ofmind of that is Yeah.
I, I didn't have that and Ireally wish I would've.
And so I enjoy, as I saidearlier, trying to take care of
(36:22):
some of that fear and anxietyfor people.
And, you know, people obviously,are sometimes, I'll just say
maybe a little hesitant to sharesome of their fears with family.
You know, our close friends, ifit's things with mortality or,
uh, other things, you know, I'ma little more neutral, right?
(36:42):
They don't know me.
So sometimes they will sharesome things and ask some
questions, that maybe theywouldn't with immediate family
out of fear of, you know,scaring them or something like
that.
So, you know, my oncologist onetime and again has referred a
number of people to me.
Said, you know, Mike, I mightdeal with 2000 people a year,
(37:04):
right?
Well, he said, I can never sitwith somebody and go, I know
exactly what you're goingthrough because, uh, I'll tell
you, for a lot of cancerpatients, the 2, 3, 4 in the
morning, it's hell because yourfamily's all sleeping.
You know, I think back of theyears when I was going through
all the chemo, the radiation,things like that, and this is
(37:24):
common with a, a number of thepeople I've.
You know, spoken to over theyears, it, it might, you know,
and, and you're pretty sick, soyou don't, you know, somebody
says, well, read a book or watcha movie, or, you know, listen
to, it's hard to focus on things'cause between the nausea and
some of the, you know, it, it'stough And, you know, I remember
read it might be two 20 in themorning.
(37:47):
I'm up sitting in the chair, thecouch, everybody's sleeping.
And I'd try and pass the time,right.
I might try and read a littlebit.
I might try to, you know,whatever.
Do crossword puzzle, Sudoku,whatever.
And I'm not kidding, you read anhour later, it's two 30, been 10
minutes.
No, I, I, that's how, how slowit's dark.
(38:08):
Yeah.
You know, you don't want to makenoise, you know, on the tv, on
everybody's trying to sleep.
those nights for people can bejust.
Agonizing, it's so slow, youknow, during the day it's bright
out, you know, it, it's justdifferent.
But, uh, the, the nights can bereally long, so I, I try to help
people with some tips to, youknow, try and get through, uh,
(38:31):
some of that.
Um, everybody reacts differentto the chemo and the radiation.
But there are things you can doto, you know, obviously your
medical team helps with, um,nausea medications and, and
things like that.
And some work better than othersand you can go back and try
others.
But there's, there's things youcan do on your own.
sometimes it's acupuncture,sometimes meditation.
(38:53):
You, you kind of have to findyour happy place a little bit,
you know?
And, and that's nothing.
I'll say maybe your medical teamthere, there's, there's things
they do, right?
They carry a lot of load and alot of the weight, but there are
things you, you have to do onyour own.
Having you as an advocatethough, in that position is,
(39:17):
that's just seems invaluable fora new patient of family.
The perspective that you canprovide and all these years
later your, your story of beinga survivor.
And still being so active as anadvocate and as an ambassador,
really, that it's just, it'stremendous.
I'm going to put my contactinformation in the bio of this
(39:40):
podcast, and if somebody wantsto learn more about your
charity, I encourage them toreach out to me and I will
coordinate that with you.
And we, we also talk frequentlyabout a specific donation to
Minnesota Masonic Charities thatwill help us ensure that that
donation goes specifically anddirectly to where someone wants
(40:01):
it to go.
It, It's more efficient to dothat, to go directly through us
instead of just writing a acheck and sending it in.
That way we can know exactlywhere those funds and that
support is going to go.
So I will have that in the biowhen we, when this goes live,
16, almost 17 years later,you're a paragon of positivity.
(40:25):
what advice would you givesomeone who is in the midst of
their journey with cancer, withdisease, or even at the front
end of it?
you know, you take things oneday at a time.
You don't try to look out toofar'cause it's for most people,
and, and I typically deal withstage three, stage four, pretty
advanced, it, it's a long road.
(40:46):
So I'm like, you know what, youtake it one day at a time.
You don't try to say, Hey.
Two years from today, I'll begreat.
You know, hopefully you will.
But it, you know, I, it's kindof like the eating the elephant
thing, right?
One, one bite at a time.
And what I tell people, and thisis my personal experience, and a
lot of the people I've, youknow, uh, worked with over the
(41:09):
years, you know, you, you go inand you very often you get a
good scan, good blood test, goodimaging, whatever.
But I tell people, be carefulabout spiking the football.
I, I'm not trying to reign ontheir parade.
But then you go in, you know,what the next time and they say,
you know, we see something.
(41:29):
We're not sure what it's, andyou don't want to get crazy
despondent because then when yougo in 10 weeks later, they're
like, you know, whatever thatwas, it disappeared.
So, the best advice I try togive people, don't get too high.
Don't get too low, I will tell'em, it's, it's linear, you
(41:51):
know, your improvement, but onthat track that that slope of
improvement, there is a lot ofpeaks and valleys of, hey, we're
kind of wiping it out, we'reknocking it, backing its heels,
and then you hopefully knock itcompletely out because what
happens, like I said, if there'sten five percent remaining, that
(42:15):
can kind of be a super bug andthat gets really tough to deal
with.
Balance, equilibrium, secret tolife, really.
Mm-hmm.
Not just this journey, butday-to-day lives for, for all of
us.
Mike Neeson, I can't thank youenough for coming in studio
(42:37):
today and sharing your journeyand.
I, I just wanna say thanks forhaving me.
I enjoy, you know, um, sharingmy story and, and trying to give
people, um, some inspiration youknow, when, when things look
tough, right?
You, you can get through it.
Like I said, people always willsay, I couldn't do what you do,
and I tell'em Yeah, yeah, youcould.
(42:59):
Absolutely tremendous.
Mike Neeson, thank you again.
This has been another episode ofMinnesota Masonic Histories and
Mysteries.
Hi everyone.
Welcome back.
It's another episode ofMinnesota Masonic Histories and
Mysteries.
My guest today is Mike Neeson.
He's been married to his wifePatty for 32 years, has two
sons, Nick and Ben that are 28and 26 years old, respectively.
Mike was born in St.
Paul and moved to Stillwaterwhen he was five years old.
(00:21):
Attended school here locally andthen graduated from the
University of Wisconsin RiverFalls in 86.
Mike worked for Anderson Windowsand patio doors for 30 years,
retiring just a few years ago.
A big fan of golfing, bikeriding, playing tennis, skiing,
a pontoon enthusiast, and sometravel in there too.
(00:42):
A stage four colorectal cancerdiagnosis in 2008 when he was
45, has kept him very involvedin volunteering with the
University of Minnesota insupport of cancer patients.
Mike and his wife, along withanother couple, have raised
approximately one and a halfmillion dollars with 100% of
these funds.
Going to colorectal research atthe U of M Masonic Cancer
(01:05):
Center.
Mike, welcome.
Well, thanks for having me heretoday.
I appreciate it.
Before we talk about your cancerjourney, tell us a bit more
about you.
You're from this region,retiring not terribly long ago.
Yeah, I, I grew up here in theMidwest, as you said.
Grew up in St.
Paul, uh, moved to still arewhen I was, uh, very young, uh,
probably about five years old.
(01:26):
had a great life there, youknow, uh, enjoyed the, the local
schools and activities there.
as you said, uh, went over toWisconsin for, uh, uh, undergrad
school then, uh, started shortlyafter that at Anderson Windows
and my career started out in NewJersey.
When you, when you sign up at.
Anderson for a sales job,typically they're gonna send you
(01:46):
somewhere else, uh, in thecountry.
So New Jersey was, uh, where Iwas, uh, sent and being a
Midwest kid, you know, thatreally changed.
Uh, how was that?
Um, you know, I, I was single atthe time.
so the thing I really likedabout it, there was a lot of
other, uh, single Anderson salesreps, guys, you know, typically
under 35.
(02:08):
And, uh, you know, the thing inthe Midwest here.
Uh, you know, in two hoursyou're not very far.
You're down to Mankato, you'reup to Duluth.
You know, from where I lived inNew Jersey, in two hours I could
be in New York, dc, Baltimore,Philadelphia.
So, you know, I appreciatedthat.
And, uh, you know, being singleout there and I like to play
golf and my friend, so almostevery weekend, you know, we'd
(02:29):
just take turns, uh, you know,showing up at somebody else's
place to play golf for theweekend.
So.
you know, it was enjoyablethere, but I, you know, I don't
think I would've wanted to raisekids and the family, um, you
know, they talk about East Coastand it's the fast pace of life.
I always thought that was alittle ironic because to me
everything was really slow.
(02:50):
If I went to the bank, there was12, 12 people ahead of me, so it
was slow If I went to thegrocery store, you know, it was
slow.
The post office, whatever, youknow, traffic, obviously.
Yeah.
So, you know, they talk aboutthe pace of life, but I, I
always thought that was alittle, ironic because in many
facets it's not fast.
I had a work transfer to Bostonfor a couple years, and we came
(03:12):
back from that thinking Boston,New York, great places to visit.
But living, I had theopportunity to come back to
Minneapolis, St.
Paul and had a whole new, arenewed appreciation for coming
back to the Midwest.
Yeah, me, me too.
I, I'm really glad I spent a fewyears out there.
but this is where I was born andraised and I, I think, you know,
kind of, uh, my personality and,and some of my interest, you
(03:34):
know, uh, align a little betterhere in the Midwest.
How crowded was the sales marketout there to be a new guy?
A rookie, you're single.
Was that a tough market to crackor were there opportunities
everywhere?
Uh, and Anderson now is, is uh,is pretty much nationwide, but
you know, it's 130 3-year-oldcompany now.
For a long time, it was Midwestand East coast.
(03:56):
Um, along the shore out therewhere I was in New Jersey, you
could literally find 50 homes ina row that were Anderson
windows.
Really.
One that wasn't 40 Anderson is,is kind of out there.
It's like Coke or Pepsi orwhatever you'd say.
It's, it's synonymous withWindows.
People would say, That's whatthey think of for Windows.
(04:16):
Now if you're in the Southwest,it's changed a little bit now.
but when I was out there, it wasa very prominent name.
so and, and it wasn't a salesjob, like you think you're going
house to house or anything likethat.
We worked through distributors,so all it was really was working
with your distributors who hadsalespeople who called on the
lumberyards.
Then the lumberyards, you know,deal with the contractors and
(04:37):
architects and things like that.
So it was really, uh, kind of amultiplication of efforts and as
much of a sales job, I wouldsay.
It was more of a, a training andeducation and, um, you know,
helping the people, who werereally dealing with more of the
frontline builders andarchitects, contractors, things
like that.
As you were recapping that, inmy mind I was thinking about
(04:58):
what it would've been like to godoor to door and have the door
slammed in your face in the oldNew Jersey, New York cliche.
So the arrangement of havingdistributor and whatnot had to
make life a whole lot easier.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You know, but the, and again,this is just my opinion, right?
It was to, to make friends outthere wasn't real easy.
They're a little cliquey, youknow?
(05:19):
but once you made friends, theywere pretty good friends.
They, you know, once you couldget in, they were pretty tight,
pretty loyal.
And, uh, I, I used to kidpeople, I said, you know, I was
about the only middle classoutta 18 million people living
there.
You know, being from the Midwesthere, I had never seen that kind
of wealth.
And on the other hand, I hadnever seen that kind of poverty.
And, you know, I used to jokehere in the Midwest, uh, I'll
(05:41):
just say, in the Twin cities,70% of the people are middle
class.
You know, you have 10 or 15% ateach end.
But out there, to me it was theopposite, you know?
Yeah.
It was extreme.
Extreme wealth along the shore,some of the suburbs of
Philadelphia, you know, NewYork, things like that.
And then, like I said, in Camdenand parts of Philly, the poverty
(06:04):
I had never seen, even if youtalk about North Minneapolis.
Oh, it, it doesn't hold acandle.
No, not even close.
You see the full spectrum likeyou described of both and then
everything in between.
No doubts.
How many years were you outthere before you returned to the
Midwest?
Uh, about two and a half years.
Okay.
And then when along that journeydid you meet Patty?
Um, shortly after I came backand, uh, um, one of my friends,
(06:28):
uh, and one of her friends setus up on a, a blind date.
So many blind date stories andI'm, let me guess, were you
reluctant to do it?
Were you thinking, oh God,what's this gonna be like?
No, no.
I'm, I'm super outgoing.
I'm always open for.
You know, uh, and as we talktoday, I'll give you some
examples of, of things you'd gothat that's not what a normal
(06:48):
person would be comfortabledoing.
Two sons, Nick and Ben.
I believe we said they were 28and 26.
Mm-hmm.
I'm sure that's gone fast.
Uh, I, I can't believe it.
I was talking to a friend ofmine yesterday.
We had a retirement party for,uh, one of my coworkers and, uh,
you know, we were talking aboutour kids and stuff and they
both, uh, graduated from theUniversity of Minnesota in
(07:09):
Duluth.
And it seems like they werejust.
Starting there and we were justdropping'em off.
And now actually they've bothbeen done for years and years,
you know.
Wow.
And so, yeah, it, it's crazy howfast, you know, from when they
were, you know, they were both,uh, super involved with, uh,
baseball when they were young.
And I remember going to all thefields and the games and, you
know.
(07:29):
Every single weekend.
My wife had had one directionwith one to Apple Valley.
I'd had, you know, the otherdirection up to Forest Lake or
something with the other, and itwas a ton of fun.
But it sure doesn't seem likethat was probably now 15 years
ago.
You know, and I, I can't believeit.
The exhausting schedules I thinkare continually getting worse
for parents.
(07:49):
I dunno if worse is the rightword.
Yeah.
But more hectic.
The, the tournaments that areyear round, the travel.
Oh yeah.
When you, it's when, when I wasin school, you know, e
everything was pretty much free.
You know, I played in the golfteam, I played tennis.
Um, now, you know, like yousaid, the time commitments in
the year round and the expenses,Unbelievable.
that.
A friend of mine has an8-year-old eight.
(08:10):
Relatively new to hockey.
Mm-hmm.
And there are tournaments inChicago in travel and when, when
I was a kid, it was a seasonalthing, basketball, hockey.
And you just picked it up again.
Well, I guess that's aging me.
Aging us.
Yeah.
Because now it's a year-roundthing.
Oh yeah.
Everyone's focused on making itto the big time and it, I can't
even fathom having kids.
(08:30):
In that crucible of activitybetween schoolwork and
extracurriculars and hopefullysome other, just hobbies in
general.
Yeah.
When I played baseball, youknow, I think most of my games
were noon or one, there were noparents there.
If dad, if dad showed up, it wasa nice surprise.
Mm-hmm.
But never expected.
Right.
Sometimes he'd sneak out in Juneor early July, and you're right,
(08:51):
that was just glove over thehandlebar and away we went in
that little pack of bikes andGod, what great memories.
So in 2008.
You received some devastatingnews, to say the least.
To say the least.
Was that a phone call or whatled to that appointment that you
went in to see a physician?
Yeah, I, you know, um, I wasdiagnosed in, uh, September of
(09:14):
oh eight, but, uh, my symptomsreally started early in 2008,
and I was in perfect health, andI'm telling you, I'm super
active, super involved, youknow, physical activity.
Sure.
Things like that.
but in, uh, spring of, of 2008,I started to have some unusual,
I'll just say.
Stomach issues, you know,everything from gas and kind of
bloating and, you know, uh,digestive problems, things like
(09:37):
that.
So I went into my local and Ididn't even have a GP think of
this.
I didn't even have a doctor'cause I hadn't really been in
other than maybe for a physicalor something, since I was in
college.
Really?
Mm-hmm.
You know, playing sports.
And, uh, so I went in, he, youknow, I explained my symptoms
and he said, I, I really, reallythink you're based on everything
you say, you're, you're probablylactose intolerant.
(09:59):
You know, what do I know, right?
I'm a sure window guy.
Yeah.
And, uh, and you're healthyotherwise.
Oh, I, yeah.
It's not like there's someobvious thing of, oh, you should
eliminate this or do Right.
And I wasn't really, you know, Iwasn't fatigued or tired or
anything.
It was just these stomach issueskind of.
So I changed my diet for a fewmonths and it didn't get any
better.
So I went back in, he said, tellme your symptoms again.
Remind me, you know, and so I gothrough everything again.
(10:22):
And he said, uh.
I think it's gluten.
I think you have gluten issues.
So I changed my diet again a fewmore months.
Right.
And, but now it's midsummer and,uh, and I'm not getting better.
I'm actually getting worse,these symptoms.
And now, I have blood in mystool.
Oh boy.
So that's, you know, kind of aripe, pretty serious.
So that gets your attention.
(10:44):
And, uh, so I was 45.
And so he said at that time,the, the protocol was really
like 50 for.
Uh, to have a colonoscopy.
So he said, Hey, you know,you're gonna have a colonoscopy
in a few years.
Let's just do it now.
And so I went in and sureenough, I remember waking up
outta the sedation and he showsme a photo and he says, do you
know what this is?
(11:04):
You know, I'm kind of like, I'llgo out in a limb and say.
It's my colon.
You're still under a littleDilaudid.
A little, a little.
Yeah.
Verse said di you know, so Isaid, you know, it's, I assume
it's my colon.
He said, yep.
And he goes, he points to a spoton.
He goes, do you know what thisis?
And I said, no.
He said.
That's, that's a mass, a tumor,and we did a biopsy, but we
(11:25):
believe it's malignant by, youknow, our experience.
And he said it's, you know, likethree centimeters, it's over an
inch.
It's very large.
Mm-hmm.
You know, and so to your point,my, my life changed in a day,
you know, in just one.
Day.
And uh, you know, I was reallyfortunate when people talk
about, you know, sometimes themedical system here, you know,
(11:48):
in the health system in the usbut, um, I spent a fair amount
of time in Canada for one of thecompanies.
Okay.
You know, we had acquired, so Ihad friends there and I, you can
say, yeah, things are.
You know, maybe free up there,but the time and the delays, you
know, here from when I wasdiagnosed, uh, and then I had
all my treatment at the U.
I was diagnosed on the 18th ofSeptember, and by the first week
(12:12):
of October I had already had PETscans, CT scans, MRIs, and I, in
that first week I had alreadystarted my chemo and radiation.
Really?
So really from two weeks fromwhen I was diagnosed, I had not
only been into the U for.
You know, to see an oncologist,colorectal surgeon, urology
surgeon, and I was alreadystarting my treatment, all of
(12:34):
that in two weeks.
It's unheard of.
Amazing.
So in, in that diagnosis, I.
Was a stage four mm-hmm.
Colorectal cancer.
What, what does that, what did,how did that conversation go?
What does that sound like with adoctor?
Not good.
So, you know, again, I was a layperson and so I, I go in and I
had one of the best surgeons in,in the Midwest, and I, I can't
(12:56):
say enough about, DavidRothenberger, he's renowned, all
over the u in the Midwest.
And, uh, and it couldn't havebeen better to deal with.
And he, he had said to me.
He had looked over all my scans,imaging.
He said, you know, this is stagefour.
And while I'm a late person, Iknow there's only, there's no
stage five and I know four isworse than three than two, you
(13:17):
know, and so I said, uh.
Well, what's that mean?
Tell me more.
And he said, well, it'smetastasized to your lungs, you
know, and then some of my otherorgans in my, my abdomen.
And, so real quick, it gotreally serious.
Yeah.
You know, it's one thing to getthe diagnosis, but then to hear
that it's metastasized and it'sspread.
(13:38):
I went down, um, for a secondopinion to the male.
when I speak, I, I say, it'skinda like a car.
They, they weren't callouseddown there, but they're kinda
like the radiator shot, thetransmission shot, the engine
shot.
You know, the, they're kindalike, I, I don't know if it's
worth.
Maybe we need a new car.
You know, I'm not sure it'sright, you know, financially
(13:59):
prudent to try to, you know, fixthis and, and so, but, um, Dr.
Rothenberger was great.
He said, you know, uh, didn'tmake any promises.
but he was always, you know,encouraging.
My oncologist over there.
I can't say enough about, um,when I got back from the Mayo
with some less than encouragingnews, I asked him, and I didn't
(14:20):
tell him what the Mayo had said,but, uh, I said, you know, what
are my odds?
And he said, Mike, unless I canfind a whole pile of 45-year-old
non-smokers, non-diabetic,really healthy people goes, I, I
don't know what your odds are,but he said, and I, I always
mention this when I speak, hesaid, but I'll tell you this,
Mike.
He goes, at the end of the day.
(14:41):
Odds are zero or a hundred'causeit can't be 30% alive.
And that really, that reallykind of stuck with me.
And from that point on I waskind of like, alright, you know,
we will give it everything wegot.
Mm-hmm.
You know, and my, uh, actuallyfor stage four, uh, colorectal,
uh, cancer patients, even todaywhen I was diagnosed, the five
year survival rate was about 6%.
(15:04):
Which, you know, it's one out of17.
Right.
That's not.
Not too encouraging.
now, today, um, 16 years later,uh, it's about 12%.
So it's still, it's still low.
You know, colon cancer is one ofthese unusual super
preventative, right?
You're going for yourcolonoscopy.
All this starts as a polyp.
If they have the polyp, theydon't even tell you, right?
(15:26):
Come back in two weeks.
They just take it off right inthere.
Do it.
Yeah.
So it's.
In a way it's really, reallypreventative.
'cause there aren't many othercancers where you could, really
get that early detection that,that easy.
I mean, you know, without, uh,without a, a lot of involvement.
But, uh, you know, so I started,uh, you know, all my chemo and
(15:48):
radiation, the, the fall of oheight.
Um, and fast.
It was just about immediateafter your diagnosis.
Oh yeah.
They got me in, you know, rightaway and, uh, so I ended up
actually, that fall goingthrough, um, 40, uh, radiation
treatments Monday throughFriday.
40 40 for eight weeks.
Oh yeah.
Monday through Friday.
Eight weeks, every single day.
(16:09):
Um, and the chemo, and then theygave me.
December off, you know, that wasto kind of recover.
They had already told me surgerywould be in early January, so I
had December off, but, um, hadwent back in for another, uh,
PET scan, MRI, things like that.
I was getting CT scans, uh,pretty frequently, but the tumor
(16:29):
had shrunk by about 50% Reallywhen I went in, in early
December.
And, you know, I remember askingRothenberg, he, he said, that's
very encouraging.
I said, I, I get that and, butit's gonna come out anyway.
Why?
Again, as a lay person, I'mlike, why does that matter?
And he, he said, well, you know,if, if the large tumor is being
(16:50):
impacted, all these things onthe periphery, these microscopic
cells, there's a good chancethose are being impacted.
And so that, you know, madesense to me.
And so, Then it, uh, I, and Iknew as soon as I went out
because my tumor was extremelylow in my colon, actually, on
day one, he said, you're gonnahave a colostomy.
(17:12):
Yeah.
Not there's a chance price.
No.
100, not the 99, 100 because itwas so low.
He said, when we take that massout and then um, some of the
surrounding tissue, So I knewthat, but you know, that didn't
really bother me.
I didn't think about that much.
I'll fall.
Because I was really kind of inthe battle with the chemo and
(17:32):
the radiation Sure.
And, and things like that.
But then in December, right nowI'm not, I'm done with the chemo
and radiation.
And so I start thinking aboutthat and I don't know anyone
with a colostomy, you know?
Yeah.
If, if all of a sudden tomorrowyou were diagnosed with
diabetes, you, you know, whetherpeople with that and maybe
somebody with a pump and you canask questions, whatever.
But, uh, but I didn't and so, Iwas kind of in denial a little
(17:56):
bit.
I thought, well, maybe becausethis tumor shrunk, maybe when
they actually get in there, theywon't have to take as much and I
won't end up with it.
You know, I was kind of, andthat's not my nature to kind of
be in denial, but in, in thatcase, I was, and so late
December, I go in and they do.
What's called marking you wherethe stoma is gonna be.
Okay.
You know, kind of in your lower,under your belt line, you know,
(18:18):
but they mark me twice left andright and I'm like, well maybe
they, until they're in there forthe surgery, they won't know if
they're gonna put it on the leftor the right side.
Yeah.
So I go in on January 6th and,uh, Dr.
Rothenberger, who again thinkthe world of says, this is Dr.
Sean Elliott.
(18:39):
He's gonna take out yourbladder.
Oh boy.
And I'm like.
Humor me, kind of like, why, whywould we do that?
You know, I don't have bladdercancer or anything, but what had
happened is through those 40radiation treatments, which
probably helped save my life,but it's not without collateral
damage.
Yeah.
And so it fried, um, what arecalled, um, my ureters And so he
(19:03):
said, and he wasn't, he, hemeant this in the nicest way.
He said, if, if you're used, ifyou get used to one bag, you'll
get used to two.
And so I literally said to him,I said, whatever type of
sedation you're gonna give me ina few minutes, I said, you gimme
something right now.
But he made the right callbecause you know, I've been a
(19:26):
double ostomy patient here nowfor, It'll be 17 years almost.
Yeah.
And I'm, I'm telling you, andit's all right.
Perspective and how you handlethings.
I, I'm telling you, it's justnot a big deal.
It's just not.
Yeah.
You know, I, I golf, I ski, I doeverything.
I travel.
Um, and I tell people,'cause Ideal with a lot of ostomy
patients pre and post-surgery.
(19:47):
Really?
And I tell people, if you thinkit's gonna be a big deal.
It's gonna be a big deal.
Mm-hmm.
If you don't, you know, peopledeal with all kinds of things.
Right.
but sometimes paralysis and, uh,you know, amputations and Sure.
All the things people deal with.
And then people go, oh, Icouldn't deal with that.
Yeah, you could.
Mm-hmm.
(20:07):
So in 2008 you received the newsstage four colorectal.
You go through this regimen, 40sessions of chemo, the December
off to get lost in yourthoughts.
Here.
Here we are though.
Fast forward 16, almost 17 yearslater, that is defying some
serious odds.
Oh, a absolutely, because, Youknow, after, so I was in the
(20:28):
hospital 24 days, you know, gohome, get used to my new body.
Right?
You, you have, you know,urostomy, mm-hmm.
Colostomy, things like that.
I.
and then, you know, I go backin, see my oncologist a little,
you know, few weeks later and hesays, Hey, we're gonna start
another 26 weeks of chemo.
Oh my God.
So that gets me down to, youknow, around the 4th of July.
(20:48):
And you know what, Reid, the,the chemo never bothered me too
much.
The radiation is brutal.
especially depending where youget it.
I, I'm not saying breast canceror something would be easier,
but you know, if you're getting.
Radiation right in your rectumeffect.
I, I, early on, um, it was sopainful.
(21:10):
I was kidding.
My radiologist, Dr.
Chen, I said, uh.
This isn't gonna be a problem.
'cause I said I'm done eating.
I, I would because I'm like, ifnothing goes in, nothing comes
out.
Right.
And she, she says, that's notrealistic.
I said, I realize that.
I'm just joking.
But anyway, so I go through theother 26 weeks of chemo.
Um, so that gets me to thesummer of 2009.
(21:33):
Um, I'm not working during thistime.
My employer couldn't have beenbetter.
I, I had a pretty big job.
they.
Back filled it.
But when I came back in Octoberof that year, it was my job.
It wasn't like, Hey, you know,we have a project to put you on.
Your job's gone.
I mean, they, they, and theywere checking in with me all the
time.
Couldn't have been better.
But, so that summer, um, Ifinished the chemo in July.
(21:55):
I get back to, to golfing alittle bit, which is a big deal
for me.
And so my friends, who I haven'tseen in a long time said, uh,
you know, like, how's your golfgame?
I said, it's fabulous.
I said, I haven't hit a bad shotyet.
And they're like.
What do you mean?
You know, what's your deal?
And I, and I, you know, ifyou're a golfer, I'm like, it
can go in the pond, it can goout of bounds, it can go in the
bunker.
(22:16):
There are no bad shots.
Right.
It, it's all perspective.
And, uh, so then I went back to,uh, work in October, uh,
full-time, you know, in October,about one year later.
Um, yeah.
Um, about exactly from what, I'msorry.
And you know what Rothenbergertold me?
He goes, this is gonna be a oneyear deal.
And it literally.
It was a one year deal, butthen, you know, we had talked
(22:38):
about being stage four, so didmetastasize right away, even at
my early diagnosis, um, intoboth lungs.
I.
And at that time they weren'ttoo concerned about,'cause
they're just trying to deal withthe colon cancer.
Right?
Sure.
but now, you know, I go back towork in, October of oh nine.
have a really good, you know,two years.
(22:58):
I'm going in every, quarter,every three months for checkups,
things like that.
things are okay.
But then in the fall, two yearsfrom then in the fall of 2011.
I got a cough and I can't shakeit.
And it's, it's brutal.
And so I go in early.
I had just for cancer patientsthe first two years you go in
(23:19):
for CT scans, blood work, thingslike that, every 12 weeks, every
quarter.
But if you can make it twoyears, then they move you to six
months.
So I had just gotten onto my sixmonths, but I got this cough and
I'm not gonna wait.
I'm only two, three months into,you know, the six months.
So I go in early.
And they said, sure enough, oneof the lobes, one of the tumors
(23:42):
in one of my lobes had startedto really grow.
And so they said, we gottaremove that.
So I go in for what's called thelobectomy, and you have three
lobes in your right, two in yourleft.
And uh, I was, when I wasdiagnosed, I had five tumors,
one in every lobe.
(24:03):
If they were all in one, you,you know, you could, mine were
all spread out.
So that was why the mail gave mesuch a dire prognosis.
so I have it removed and insteadof a 24 day hospital stay read,
I literally go in on a Fridaymorning.
I am out Saturday night,compared to what I'm used to,
I'm, I'm like, this was.
(24:24):
Pretty easy, right?
Sure.
So, and it, it really wasn't toopainful or anything, you know?
so it's a couple weeks afterthat, I'm back home and I go see
my oncologist, he says, how's itgoing?
I'm like, you know, it's not toopainful.
I said, I was kind of in andout, literally like 36 hours.
Mm-hmm.
and he said, well, I'm, I'm gladit went well because.
We're gonna start another 26weeks of chemo.
(24:48):
So now this is gonna be 62weeks.
And he said, plus we're going todo two types of chemo.
We're doing the oral, what'scalled Xeloda, and then we're
also gonna do an IV infusioncalled Oxaliplatin, which you
wouldn't wish on your worstenemy.
Really?
It's you.
You can't even imagine.
It's highly, highly metallic.
So everything, oh yeah.
(25:09):
Uh.
Feels cold and I was taking it,think of this in the winter, but
you can't really even drink, uh,room temperature water.
'cause let's say that's 65degrees.
Mm-hmm.
That feels incredibly cold.
so, you know, I went months andit's just tea.
Think of this warm ensure, likee everything.
You can't have anything that'sremotely.
(25:31):
Yeah.
so I, I get through, I'm almostthrough that 26 weeks.
I.
And, uh, which puts you at achemo schedule now of over a
year if you're Oh, yeah, yeah.
Adding the weeks out now.
Yeah.
62 weeks.
I did.
I did 10, 10 weeks in thebeginning, then 26, then another
26.
But before I can finish thatsecond 26 weeks, I start getting
(25:52):
brutal kidney pain.
And so I, I go in and I see Dr.
Elliot, my urology surgeon, andwhat has happened, I, I
mentioned earlier, everybody,for the most part, right?
You have two kidneys and youhave what are called ureters.
They're like straws that drainyour kidney down to your
bladder.
And although I don't have thebladder, I got the, the ureters,
the.
(26:12):
Again, picture'em like straws,but what has happened from all
the radiation and it took awhile, but I have what are
called strictures or kinks in astraw.
So if you think about a straw,instead of it being clear, you
know, there, there's kinks init.
And so the urine can't really,I.
Come out of your kidneys anddrain through these straws, you
(26:33):
know, seamlessly, becausethere's kind of kinks if you
think of a hose or a straw.
So Dr.
Elliot explains, he says, we'regonna put in stents, you know,
to, to open these ureters and,and these.
And I, I swear Reed, I golfedwith a couple guys and I worked
with a couple guys who had heartstents, but obviously I've never
(26:54):
seen one.
But I remember sitting in Dr.
Elliot's office and he says,we're gonna put in stints, you
know, to keep this open so theurine can flow through.
I swear, Reed, even though Ihaven't seen one, I take my
fingers and I hold'em like this,like an inch apart.
And I say, I get the concept.
He looks at me and goes, I don'tthink you do.
(27:15):
He said, these are gonna be 16inches long.
Oh my God.
And he said, we're gonna change'em every 70 days for the rest
of your life.
How were you maintaining anylevel of.
Optimism of, okay, well this isthe next, this is the next
(27:35):
chapter.
This is the next part of theto-do list.
It, you know, part of it.
How, how do you part of It'sjust the way I was wired.
Okay.
I, I, I, I, you know, I, Inever, and I, I'm not boasting,
but I, I never, once through thewhole thing ever was like, why
me?
Or, you know, I, I wish I had myold life back.
'cause that was just kind of nota good use of time or energy
(27:58):
'cause it was more always aboutgoing forward and, and again,
I'm just kind of wired as apretty optimistic person.
My friends, like I said, I playa ton of golf and I.
my golf game, right?
Everybody got strong points,weak points.
You know, my strong point is, isputting be, and, and they're,
you know, and some of it'smental, and I say I actually,
and obviously I don't, but I, Ithink every 15, 18, I don't care
(28:21):
if 22 foot put, I actuallybelieve I'll make everyone.
I don't.
But it's that mentality, youknow, uh, of that.
But with the stint, so if youthink about now, it's been.
Because I didn't have thoseright away.
It took two years.
So it's been about 14 years.
I've had the stints.
Now I go in, I'll go in a weekfrom Monday here on the 14th.
So I go in every 55 days here,so it's been 14 years.
(28:44):
So I go in seven times a year.
first of all, your level ofoptimism is.
I've never heard a story likethis.
And then to be in the face ofsuch adversity, just dealing
with it.
I, I was listening to adifferent podcast recently and
the line of the, theencouragement of the guest was,
(29:06):
I.
How do we maintain indifferenceto things that we can't control?
And while Sure, being a happywarrior and being an optimist,
we, someone could set out to dothat, but what you've been
through would've taken down amere mortal How was your
experience at the Masonic CancerCenter?
I know Dr.
Rothenberger was a pivotalperson along this journey.
(29:29):
Who else?
What else?
I'd love to hear more about whatthat Yeah, it's interesting.
You know, I've referred a lot ofpeople over the years, you know,
to, to the U in the MasonicCancer Center there.
and I was just telling a story,um, the other day, um, to a
patient I was working with.
you know, again, not in amedical sense, but just in a
support sense.
Mm-hmm.
(29:50):
You know, it's a very, verylarge place and I had a urology,
surgeon, oncologist,radiologist, you know,
colorectal surgeon.
The, the thing that's amazingover there, Reed, very large
people in different buildings.
The left hand always knows whatthe right hand's doing.
Really ne never once in the 16years I've been.
Dealing over there has somebodysaid, well, I don't have those
(30:11):
test results.
I don't have those bloodresults, or, I can't see that
scan or image.
I, I mean, never once.
It's so seamless.
I, and you know, my local, um,hospital clinic, I.
it's one, 100th of the size and,and something's always getting
lost.
Sure.
Or somebody doesn't know, orthey can't find something.
I don't know.
Yeah.
You know, but I, I can't sayenough good things about the u
(30:33):
and and that's why we, you know,um, ended up kind of in a
philanthropic, charity.
Uh, we've been super supportive,you know, trying to give back.
Yes.
Um, not only, uh, financially,but I've probably spoken with,
I'm just gonna guess.
200 plus, patients, eithercancer or ostomy patients.
(30:53):
A lot of ostomy patients.
you know.
So they'll refer a lot of peopleto me.
again, not in a medical sense,but you know, how do I deal with
this?
How do I, you know, what, can Ieat?
Can I swim when I travel?
It's, uh, I, I get a lot offulfillment trying to, uh, help
people with some of theiranxiety and fear.
(31:13):
know, people when they, whenthey don't know, they speculate.
And typically when youspeculate, it's to the negative.
That's where the trouble begins.
And.
This podcast has a wide reach,and not all of our listeners are
just regional or even within theUS only, but for our listeners,
it may not be familiar.
The Masonic Cancer Center at theUniversity of Minnesota is one
(31:35):
of the nation's leadingcomprehensive cancer centers, M
Health Fairview, combining ahistory of science and discovery
with a commitment to deliveringpersonalized cancer care for
every single family they serve.
And this is a partnership thatallows them at mHealth Fairview
to provide the most advancedtreatment options in early phase
(31:58):
clinical trials.
We're recording this in April ofthis year.
In a few weeks we have ourannual Masonic Cancer Center
dinner, and over the lasthandful of years, we've had the
privilege of hosting and hearingfrom Dr.
Douglas Yee.
He's a medical oncologist.
He specializes in breast cancer.
Dr.
Jen Poynter, she's a professorof epidemiology, clinical
(32:20):
research.
She's overseeing the 10,000family study, which is an
incredible cohort study going onthat is in this region, not just
limited to Minnesota.
Last year, Dr.
Jacob Toler spoke at the MasonicCancer Center.
He's in pediatrics, blood andmarrow transplant, cellular
therapy, and it was very specialto hear him say.
(32:43):
That they're able to do the workthat they do at the Masonic
Cancer Center, the Children'sHospital, because of the Masons,
because of the free Masons ofMinnesota and of across our
country that have contributedto, to this endeavor.
It's very special for theMasons, especially in Minnesota,
to feel as though they have apart of all of these tremendous
(33:06):
things that are happening,especially at the Masonic Cancer
Center in the.
Diligent search for a cure andfor research breakthroughs that
are happening at a verybreakneck pace.
From what we're, from what weare told.
Mm-hmm.
In my journeys, I visit a lot oflodges.
I visit with business leadersabout how they can contribute to
(33:26):
Masonic Cancer Center or, or anyone of the number of facilities
we have.
And you, you have a charityspecifically that you and your
wife are I.
And one and one other couple.
Yeah.
Take the lead on.
Tell us more about that.
well, one of our friends, helost his, uh, wife, uh, Danez
and Coates, uh, to colon cancer,uh, back in 2015.
(33:48):
we were friends and, um.
hers was very, very aggressive.
and unfortunately for her itwas, it was a short, um, a short
battle.
But, um, before she passed, shestarted, um, a research fund.
And, uh, I.
The two couples, my wife and I,and then, Dick and and his new
(34:09):
wife, uh, Lyne have, uh, we'vecontinued that on and, uh, with,
you know, the help of the u youknow, we've been very successful
in, in raising money.
We have a big annual, Boat ride,paddle, boat, ride in the St.
Croix every year.
and I think we've done it nownine years.
And as you say, like Dr.
Y has attended each year, the,the, the faculty at the U has
(34:30):
been super supportive.
I.
Of, you know, our charity and,and you know, you could say,
well, sure they're getting allthe proceeds, but I think it's
more than that.
They, they're very engaged in,in the work we're doing.
Um, and it's important work, youknow, um, But a lot of the work
we've done and the money we'veraised, we refer to it as seed
(34:51):
money.
So, you know, some people think,you know that the NIH or the U
just has a big pile of money andsomebody has an idea and you
know, and it gets funded thatthat's not how it works.
And so the money we raise, a lotof times they might take 50,
$75,000 and they'll use it in aproof of concept.
(35:14):
And sometimes that bears fruit,right?
Sometimes it doesn't.
But in some of the cases whereit has.
The D-O-D-N-I-H some of these,have ended up giving one to even
$3 million grants off of, uh,projects that we helped fund in
their infancy.
So it's, it's very importantwork, to get started.
(35:36):
Or a lot of that work neverwould because, uh, some of the
labs we support at the u andsome of the research, they, they
simply wouldn't have funding ifit wasn't for groups like us.
and I really appreciate what youdo in supporting, say a new
patient who, someone's going tobe undergoing a new regimen of
treatment, or have an operation,have a procedure where obviously
(36:00):
nerves and stress are at an alltime high.
And what you do, it sounds liketo mentor, coach, help give them
some affirmation that You'regonna come out of this just fine
and it's gonna be okay.
I, that's gotta, the peace ofmind of that is Yeah.
I, I didn't have that and Ireally wish I would've.
And so I enjoy, as I saidearlier, trying to take care of
(36:22):
some of that fear and anxietyfor people.
And, you know, people obviously,are sometimes, I'll just say
maybe a little hesitant to sharesome of their fears with family.
You know, our close friends, ifit's things with mortality or,
uh, other things, you know, I'ma little more neutral, right?
(36:42):
They don't know me.
So sometimes they will sharesome things and ask some
questions, that maybe theywouldn't with immediate family
out of fear of, you know,scaring them or something like
that.
So, you know, my oncologist onetime and again has referred a
number of people to me.
Said, you know, Mike, I mightdeal with 2000 people a year,
(37:04):
right?
Well, he said, I can never sitwith somebody and go, I know
exactly what you're goingthrough because, uh, I'll tell
you, for a lot of cancerpatients, the 2, 3, 4 in the
morning, it's hell because yourfamily's all sleeping.
You know, I think back of theyears when I was going through
all the chemo, the radiation,things like that, and this is
(37:24):
common with a, a number of thepeople I've.
You know, spoken to over theyears, it, it might, you know,
and, and you're pretty sick, soyou don't, you know, somebody
says, well, read a book or watcha movie, or, you know, listen
to, it's hard to focus on things'cause between the nausea and
some of the, you know, it, it'stough And, you know, I remember
read it might be two 20 in themorning.
(37:47):
I'm up sitting in the chair, thecouch, everybody's sleeping.
And I'd try and pass the time,right.
I might try and read a littlebit.
I might try to, you know,whatever.
Do crossword puzzle, Sudoku,whatever.
And I'm not kidding, you read anhour later, it's two 30, been 10
minutes.
No, I, I, that's how, how slowit's dark.
(38:08):
Yeah.
You know, you don't want to makenoise, you know, on the tv, on
everybody's trying to sleep.
those nights for people can bejust.
Agonizing, it's so slow, youknow, during the day it's bright
out, you know, it, it's justdifferent.
But, uh, the, the nights can bereally long, so I, I try to help
people with some tips to, youknow, try and get through, uh,
(38:31):
some of that.
Um, everybody reacts differentto the chemo and the radiation.
But there are things you can doto, you know, obviously your
medical team helps with, um,nausea medications and, and
things like that.
And some work better than othersand you can go back and try
others.
But there's, there's things youcan do on your own.
sometimes it's acupuncture,sometimes meditation.
(38:53):
You, you kind of have to findyour happy place a little bit,
you know?
And, and that's nothing.
I'll say maybe your medical teamthere, there's, there's things
they do, right?
They carry a lot of load and alot of the weight, but there are
things you, you have to do onyour own.
Having you as an advocatethough, in that position is,
(39:17):
that's just seems invaluable fora new patient of family.
The perspective that you canprovide and all these years
later your, your story of beinga survivor.
And still being so active as anadvocate and as an ambassador,
really, that it's just, it'stremendous.
I'm going to put my contactinformation in the bio of this
(39:40):
podcast, and if somebody wantsto learn more about your
charity, I encourage them toreach out to me and I will
coordinate that with you.
And we, we also talk frequentlyabout a specific donation to
Minnesota Masonic Charities thatwill help us ensure that that
donation goes specifically anddirectly to where someone wants
(40:01):
it to go.
It, It's more efficient to dothat, to go directly through us
instead of just writing a acheck and sending it in.
That way we can know exactlywhere those funds and that
support is going to go.
So I will have that in the biowhen we, when this goes live,
16, almost 17 years later,you're a paragon of positivity.
(40:25):
what advice would you givesomeone who is in the midst of
their journey with cancer, withdisease, or even at the front
end of it?
you know, you take things oneday at a time.
You don't try to look out toofar'cause it's for most people,
and, and I typically deal withstage three, stage four, pretty
advanced, it, it's a long road.
(40:46):
So I'm like, you know what, youtake it one day at a time.
You don't try to say, Hey.
Two years from today, I'll begreat.
You know, hopefully you will.
But it, you know, I, it's kindof like the eating the elephant
thing, right?
One, one bite at a time.
And what I tell people, and thisis my personal experience, and a
lot of the people I've, youknow, uh, worked with over the
(41:09):
years, you know, you, you go inand you very often you get a
good scan, good blood test, goodimaging, whatever.
But I tell people, be carefulabout spiking the football.
I, I'm not trying to reign ontheir parade.
But then you go in, you know,what the next time and they say,
you know, we see something.
(41:29):
We're not sure what it's, andyou don't want to get crazy
despondent because then when yougo in 10 weeks later, they're
like, you know, whatever thatwas, it disappeared.
So, the best advice I try togive people, don't get too high.
Don't get too low, I will tell'em, it's, it's linear, you
(41:51):
know, your improvement, but onthat track that that slope of
improvement, there is a lot ofpeaks and valleys of, hey, we're
kind of wiping it out, we'reknocking it, backing its heels,
and then you hopefully knock itcompletely out because what
happens, like I said, if there'sten five percent remaining, that
(42:15):
can kind of be a super bug andthat gets really tough to deal
with.
Balance, equilibrium, secret tolife, really.
Mm-hmm.
Not just this journey, butday-to-day lives for, for all of
us.
Mike Neeson, I can't thank youenough for coming in studio
(42:37):
today and sharing your journeyand.
I, I just wanna say thanks forhaving me.
I enjoy, you know, um, sharingmy story and, and trying to give
people, um, some inspiration youknow, when, when things look
tough, right?
You, you can get through it.
Like I said, people always willsay, I couldn't do what you do,
and I tell'em Yeah, yeah, youcould.
(42:59):
Absolutely tremendous.
Mike Neeson, thank you again.
This has been another episode ofMinnesota Masonic Histories and
Mysteries.
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