May 26, 2025 • 37 mins
Why moms need “Safe + Secure: Life With the Good Shepherd”
Melanie and Christy are joined with friends Hilary, Kayla, and Alicia to talk about why the upcoming MomLife season is going to be so good for moms—especially in light of a world that can often feel crazy fast! The world seems to be swirling with noise, distractions, expectations, instability, and chaos. No matter what season of motherhood you’re in, you likely feel it—the weight of endless to-do lists, late-night worries, deeply rooted fears, and moments of wondering, Am I enough? This can leave our heart and soul unsettled and uncertain. And the enemy loves it. He thrives on whispering lies that stir up insecurity, impatience, and fear.
But here’s the truth: You were never meant to be enough or have it all figured out on your own. Now, more than ever, we need deeper communion with our Shepherd. And deep, encouraging community with one another!
Check out our new theme for 2025-26! Safe + Secure: Life With the Good Shepherd
…
Find out more about MomLife Ministries at www.momlife.org.
- Sign up for The MomLife Monthly, our monthly email newsletter at www.momlife.org.
- Register to PARTICIPATE in a Local MomLife Group! www.momlife.org/get-connected Note: We’ll be adding more locations through July!
Don’t see a group near you? (1) Join our virtual MomLife group, (2) join as an individual participant and maybe grab one mom friend to register to go through the curriculum with you, or (3) think about starting a group for your local mom friends! We’re here to help with all the details.
- Register to Start/Lead a Local MomLife Group! We’re always looking for new leaders and churches to host MomLife groups! You can host a group in your home, your church, a coffee shop, over your lunch break at work… the options are endless for how you use the MomLife curriculum to engage with gospel-centered teaching videos, spiritual discussion prompts, and personal study.
Check out more information about becoming an Independent Partner (lead a small group of 2-12 mom friends) or Church Partner (lead a larger group of 20+ moms with multiple small groups) at www.momlife.org.
Partner registration ends on July 18, 2025.
More Questions? Email info@momlife.org. We’d love to hear from you!
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Find out more: momlife.org
Editing: Angela Edwards
Music: "Another Successful Day" Music by Bohdan Kuzmin
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_02 (00:01):
Welcome to the Mom Life Ministries Podcast.
We're your hosts, Melanie andChristy.
We get it.
Being a mom is messy yet lovelyin a very real way, whatever
your age or season ofmotherhood, and we want to talk
about it all.
SPEAKER_04 (00:15):
We certainly aren't experts at this mom thing, but
we'll share what we're learning,how Jesus has encouraged us all
along the way on this journeythat we call Mom Life.
SPEAKER_02 (00:25):
Hey friends, welcome.
We are currently at the Mom LifePlanning Retreat where we are
planning all of our curriculumand content for this next year.
And we have a whole team ofgreat women who are helping us
do that.
And so today we have threespecific friends from some
different places who are goingto share a little bit of their
story about why mom life hasbeen important to them and even
(00:48):
why specifically with ourupcoming theme of safe and
secure that it would be justreally great.
for you to join in to a mom lifecommunity near you.
So friends, why don't you takejust a moment and introduce
yourselves?
SPEAKER_03 (01:02):
Hi, my name is Kayla Stevens.
I am a mom of four little kidsranging in ages from seven to 16
months.
I work from home full time and Ilove that because I get to kind
of dabble in both worlds ofbeing home with my kids and
also, you know, work for myfamily.
(01:22):
I've been a part of MomLifesince 2020, so about five years
now.
And I just finished my firstyear leading a MomLife group at
my local church.
SPEAKER_00 (01:33):
Hi, my name is Elsha Mullenix.
I am a mom of three boys.
They are seven, five, and two.
I've been married for almostnine years.
And I've been with MomLife forabout five years, too, give or
take.
And I also lead a group in mycommunity at our church.
SPEAKER_01 (01:52):
Hello, my name is Hillary Boyd.
I have been with MomLife forabout three years.
I was involved in MomLife atGrace for two, and then I lead
at my kids' school.
I have three kids.
I have a 14-year-old girl, a12-year-old boy, and an
8-year-old boy.
SPEAKER_04 (02:13):
So leading into this year, just where you sit as a
mom right now, what are some ofthe biggest distractions or
pressures you feel in thisseason?
SPEAKER_01 (02:23):
Like Kayla, working from home.
I also work from home.
I didn't mention that.
So that was recent this year.
I have been home with my kidsfor eight years straight.
And then I started workingagain, going back to work full
time.
So I committed to mom life.
(02:44):
And then I got a job.
So that was hard.
But it's all worked out.
And God is good.
And I've been able to do both.
UNKNOWN (02:51):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (02:51):
Even just that transition from staying home to
getting a job.
I mean, that's a big deal.
That's a huge change in yourdaily routine.
But then also just how yourelate with your family, you
know, and getting everybody onboard because it's just for
everybody, not just for you,which is hard.
SPEAKER_04 (03:10):
I think, too, the idea that you said, hey, I'm
going to leave this mom lifegroup and then got a job.
It would have been easy for youto say, maybe not.
But I love that God was justlike, opening up the margin for
you to do both.
And I think that that'ssomething I think about a lot in
my own journey is if I look ateverything as too big or too
(03:31):
hard or too much, I don't leaveroom for him to do the things
that only he can do.
SPEAKER_01 (03:37):
And a huge blessing is my job is so flexible.
I was able to be like, hey, I'mnot going to be available for
this chunk of time.
And yeah.
It was, it was just, it was,there's so many blessings in
that.
It's not just like the hardthing.
It was that I was able to doboth.
SPEAKER_00 (03:57):
I think one of the biggest distractions for me has
just been that my kids aregetting older.
So we're in school andactivities and it's just a lot.
I also work from home part-time,but also have a two and a
five-year-old that's with me allthe time.
And then just trying to juggle,you know, the volunteer things
(04:19):
that I do, I work at my church.
Um, so just trying to juggleevery aspect of that and doing
that well, um, sometimes it's,it's hard.
Um, but it's fun watching Godshow up and be like, I'm enough.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_03 (04:34):
So my kids are seven, five, three and 16
months.
So period.
Yeah.
It's my pressure is that, It'sso hard to be everything for
everybody.
I guess the end answer to thatis I can't.
(04:56):
And they're all in differentstages and phases and it's
wonderful.
But I think I get caught up inthe nitty gritty of packing the
lunch, changing a diaper.
Did you wipe your face?
Did you comb your hair?
And it's kind of all consumingsometimes, just even getting
people out the door in themornings.
And it's really easy to get.
(05:17):
lost in all of the little todo's of that.
That being said, mom life haskind of been like a light for me
in that busy distraction whereif I'm not filling my cup, if
I'm not setting aside time tofocus on my relationship with
the Lord first, then I can'tmeet everyone else's needs.
SPEAKER_02 (05:40):
Yeah, that's good.
Because the next question that Iwant to ask is how does the
speed and chaos of life impactyour ability to be present with
your family and with God,because I think everything that
you guys have shared issomething that every mom can
identify with, that we have thisunique pressure to try and hold
(06:01):
the world together.
I mean, our little world of ourhome and our family, but
sometimes we take on even morethan that.
And so with all of the pressureand the busyness, because I
think that every day seems to bemoving maybe even a little bit
faster and faster and faster andfaster.
And so how does that impact yourability?
(06:22):
I mean, you brought up first ofyour relationship with Jesus.
Like how does it, how does itimpact you being present with
God?
SPEAKER_03 (06:29):
Oh man, I think it's easy to focus on all the things
you're not doing.
You know, like I've oftenstruggled with feeling like,
okay, here's a podcast I canlisten to, or here's a quiet
time basket, or here's a book Ican read.
And all those are great tools.
(06:49):
But if I'm actually not inscripture every day, just for a
little bit, then those toolsdon't mean anything.
I can listen to someone talkabout it, but I'm actually
connecting with it.
So I think the biggest thing forme right now in this time that's
been helpful is just to find onething, even if it's like
(07:11):
listening to a dwell dailydevotional in the car.
That's my life.
If that's how I get scripturethat day, that's, that's going
to meet me right there.
SPEAKER_04 (07:20):
I think there's this idea too, that it has to be this
like long time in scripture.
And I think if you have thetime, of course, great, like
spend hours in scripture everyday.
But for most of us, thisbusyness and this chaos and
speed is, we don't always havethat much time.
And I think one of the things Ihear you saying, Kayla, I know
(07:41):
for me, it's often, what can Ido right now for these five
minutes I have in the car thatcan bring me back to the
presence of God and remind me,because He's always there, but
remind me of His presence.
And I might could do that threeor four times in the day, right?
And so maybe it is, I open myBible in the morning, but then
in the car, I listen tosomething else.
(08:02):
And then later in the day, Ilook at my scripture memory card
or something, you know, like Ithink that's the importance of
being present with God in theselittle moments might be the best
thing we can do in the chaos.
SPEAKER_00 (08:14):
I often, I mean, our days look like we're going, you
know, we hit the ground runningand every minute is accounted
for in a way that is likeoverwhelming.
And so I think about, you know,how can I find the minutes or
the time to be like,Intentional.
(08:35):
And so this year we've talked alot about, you know, margin and
creating that margin and thatbuffer space because our to-do
list gets so long and I losesight very quickly of why am I
even doing the to-do list, youknow?
And so you think, oh, okay, Iprobably do need to get these
tasks done, but with whatpurpose?
(08:56):
And I think, you know, holdingGod-centered and clinging to
that safety and securityrecenters me.
In those minutes of margin, I'msaying, okay, this is the
purpose.
How can I do that well and toglorify God?
SPEAKER_01 (09:10):
For me, it's like there's too much chaos when the
kids get up.
So it's being disciplined for meto get up before the kids,
which, let's face it, is noteasy.
to get up early.
I almost
SPEAKER_02 (09:25):
feel, I almost feel like, yeah, you and I, we texted
each other for a while.
Yeah.
Are you up?
Are you up?
For some accountability, butit's almost like sometimes I get
up early and then my child getsup earlier that day and it's so
frustrating.
But yeah, it's difficult to findthose times of maybe I don't
have it during the day.
How can I create it?
(09:45):
Well, that's getting up earlier.
Yeah.
It's tough.
SPEAKER_01 (09:49):
And someone marches down the stairs and wants to sit
and talk to you and you're like,All right.
I guess I'll have to wait tilllater, but yeah, like just being
a good steward of my time andtrying to fit it all in.
And that's looked different forme this year with having a
full-time job and, um, doing momlife, you know, all the things
we're all busy.
(10:10):
We all don't have enough time,but, um, being intentional when
I do have it.
SPEAKER_04 (10:15):
It's like telling your time where to go.
We've talked about that before,but I think The other thing you
said that was important andpart, I think part of this
question too is how does thespeed and the chaos of life keep
us from being present with ourfamily even?
And I think sometimes we forgetthat when they come and
interrupt the quiet time, likethey're not a distraction.
(10:37):
And it is very much God's way ofsaying, Hey, this right now is
the most important.
So to your point, you know, ofjust the to-do list and the
tasks, you know, like, Yes, theylikely need to get done.
But at what cost?
And I think that's the questionI have to ask myself a lot.
I'm a very task-oriented listkind of girl.
And it's like, no, like, yes,this thing needs to get done,
(10:59):
but it could be tomorrow or itcould be next week.
Or if you wait long enough, itmight be never.
Like it might not be asimportant as I thought it was.
And I think being present to Godand being present with our
people that he's put in front ofus will help us shape what is
most important on that list
SPEAKER_01 (11:20):
to do.
What was the guy's name thatspoke?
Josh.
Yes.
So I listened to his podcast andhe, what stuck with me that he
said was with kids, it's caught,not taught.
And that's like with mydevotional time in the morning,
like my kids see me do that.
And that was the same way withmy grandparents.
I saw them get up early in themorning and do that.
(11:42):
And then I see my daughter doingit too.
And yeah, It's just like, itwasn't something I taught her.
It just is something she just isfollowing.
SPEAKER_02 (11:52):
So Psalm 23 describes God as our shepherd.
And John 10 says that Jesus iscalling himself the good
shepherd.
And so what does this image ofGod as shepherd, what does that
mean for you?
SPEAKER_00 (12:05):
As you read through John 10, when Jesus is talking
about being the good shepherd,he says that he knows his sheep
by name.
This level of, He wants, Heknows us.
And He knows each of us.
And that level of relationshipis just so crucial.
(12:27):
And the intimacy that He has andHe desires for us, I think, is
just so profound.
Because I look at the peoplearound me and I think, I don't
know why He loves me.
But God does.
In spite of who we are, He lovesus.
And I think that's prettyamazing.
SPEAKER_02 (12:46):
In the midst of all the pressures, in the midst of
all of the to-do lists, in themidst of just trying to figure
it out and find the pockets oftime and to teach and model for
our kids what to do well, yet wecan very easily have these
voices of insecurity and notenoughness rise up.
And so this reminder that Jesusas our shepherd knows us by
(13:10):
name, that, yeah, it'sincredibly profound.
SPEAKER_03 (13:15):
Yeah.
Jesus as the good shepherd isbeautiful and amazing.
And when you hear it, you'relike, yes, I want that.
I want that in my life.
But when you really go into it,that requires a lot of surrender
of control.
And if I'm being honest, growingup, there's a lot of things in
(13:35):
my life that were out ofcontrol.
And so I sought to rectify thatas a little kid through
achievement and, and controllingwhat I could within my own self.
Now, as an adult and as someonewho maybe started truly
following the Lord a little bitlater in life, that requires me
(13:58):
to surrender my control, tosurrender my anxiety.
And Jesus is the good shepherd.
You know, the shepherd knowswhere he's going, but the sheep
doesn't.
And that's, That's scary to mein ways knowing I don't know
where I'm going to go.
I have to lay down my idea ofwhat I want for my kids, for my
(14:20):
family, my picture of good.
But I have seen the fruits ofdoing that and that his good is
so much better than I could haveever imagined.
So I say that, but it's a workin progress.
SPEAKER_04 (14:33):
I think it always will be.
a work in progress.
I think that's part of ourjourney as a sheep, right?
Is that like we follow for awhile and we might trail off and
then we get back on the path.
And I resonate with your ideathat like it requires so much
surrender and it's scary andthat's scary to me.
(14:55):
But what I've come to morelately in my journey is it's
actually so freeing To know thatlike, if I let go of control and
truly let go of control, there'sthis level of safety and rest
that comes when it's like, oh, Idon't have to be in control.
(15:15):
He can do that.
And which leads me to thisbeautiful place of rest.
And back to why we're talkingabout this this year, this place
of safety and security that I solong for, that my heart wants.
But the only way to it, right,is surrender.
That's so hard.
(15:35):
And I don't like it.
And I fight it a lot.
But when I do it, I see whatthat feels like.
And it's an experience youalmost have to do before you
know that that comes on theother side.
SPEAKER_02 (15:51):
Yeah, because control and predictable
outcomes, that's what feels safeand secure.
Because I can know what's comingor I can manipulate it to be
that good that I need or that Ithink that I want.
And so it feels completelybackwards to say I'm going to
release that and live every daywith open hands, surrendering my
(16:13):
control to the Lord.
I'm even just talking about itand getting uncomfortable.
It's such a hard thing.
thing to do on a regular basisbecause it doesn't necessarily
feel safe.
And at the same time, this trustthat we have a good shepherd who
not only knows yesterday, today,and tomorrow until the end of
(16:35):
time, but he also, Alicia, asyou said, he knows our name.
He has counted, as Psalm 139says, he has numbered every hair
on our head.
He is...
He counted the grains of sand.
He, as Job talks about, he tellsthe waves when to come in and
when to go out and the stormswhen to roll in.
(16:56):
Like, man, that's, yes, you cancontrol.
SPEAKER_04 (17:17):
He knows every hair on their heads.
He also knows their days.
And he goes before, behind, youknow, all the things.
And that also brings me such alevel of security to know that,
like, I might not know, like yousaid, Caleb, but he does.
And so I can rest in that.
(17:37):
It's comforting to me in someways and very hard.
I say that really sweet andnicely.
But the truth of the everyday,when things feel out of my
control, it's really hard andit's really messy, but I know it
to be true.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (17:53):
So in the busyness and the chaos that we've already
talked about, that makes itchallenging to find the time and
to slow down, to experience thepresence of God.
Like we're acknowledging thatthat is challenging as busy
moms, but also as you have hadthose moments of experiencing
it, how has the peace and theprovision changed?
(18:15):
that God has provided in thosemoments, how has it impacted
your just everyday life ofmotherhood?
SPEAKER_01 (18:22):
I've read the 23rd Psalm several, several times,
being raised in church.
And today in our quiet times atthe retreat, I kind of got stuck
on where David says, your rodand your staff, they comfort me.
And we were talking about therod and the staff And it's
(18:43):
correction, right?
They use that not to hit thesheep, but to just gently move
them over.
And then the correction throughthe valleys of the shadow of
death, but also to the pastures,the green pastures, where you
feel safe and secure, where youfeel at peace.
(19:04):
And that's been my whole life,not just through motherhood.
God has just corrected me verygently.
Sometimes not.
He's always been there with me.
And that makes me think of therod and the staff comfort me and
kind of pushed me through it.
Like,
SPEAKER_04 (19:21):
come on, keep going.
Well, and I think it'sinteresting too, that imagery,
even in itself, the rod and thestaff represent this protection
of God, right?
Which is what you're saying oflike, come on, let's come back
on this path.
This is more safe.
Going too far.
Right?
This is a safer path.
But then there's the provisionof the Lord too.
And that is that the shepherdsspecifically use it to like,
(19:42):
knock fruit out of trees andlike different things for food
and like provision.
And I think it's just so cool tothink about the fact that He is
all of those things.
You know, He can protect and Hecan correct and He can guide and
He can lead and He can provide.
The Lord is my shepherd.
I have everything I need and allof those things together.
(20:03):
Mm-hmm.
We resist the correction.
(20:24):
We resist the guidance.
We resist.
Or we look other places for it.
And I think that's just natural.
But then when it happens, thechaos comes.
And we don't feel at peace.
And we don't feel the joy.
And I'm guilty of it.
I do it all the time.
One day it's like walking rightalong.
And it's great.
And the shepherd's leading.
And then the next day it's like,what am I doing?
How did I get over here?
(20:45):
Oh, wait.
I remember what that was like.
Let me go back.
SPEAKER_02 (20:47):
Somebody this weekend was talking about about
how like when she's alone she'skind of just on alert you know
she's really paying attention toher surroundings and who's here
and what's going to happen butwhen she's with her husband
she's she's at rest.
She knows that he's going totake care of that.
He's going to be the one kind ofon alert and paying attention to
(21:10):
where they're going and whatthey're doing next.
And so just the safety and thecomfort that comes from knowing
that he is with her.
And so I thought that was such agood picture or whatever your
safe person is, that there isjust this natural comfort and I
can let go.
I can surrender because I amwith this person that I trust
with my whole heart and my verylife.
(21:31):
And so I know that they're goingto take care of me, whatever
comes.
And so I think that that's it.
When we do slow down to be withJesus, as you're talking about,
and have that ride and thatstaff, but just experience that
comfort.
That's everything.
When you take the moment to bewith Jesus, what are the
(21:53):
benefits?
How have you reaped the benefitof that?
SPEAKER_03 (21:56):
I think I was talking this weekend with you,
Christy, about how sometimes Ifeel like I just miss it.
I'm just...
in such the busy moments,especially at bedtime, trying to
get them all bathed and clothedand tucking them in.
And then I'm so tired.
I miss that connection piece.
But I think the same thing issaid when we just brush by our
(22:20):
connection time with Jesus, wejust miss it.
And taking those little moments,even if it's like sitting in my
car for an extra five minutesafter I get home from the
grocery store.
We all know what that's like.
Right?
To like just pray or listen toscripture.
That really does sustain me andit gives me the extra strength
(22:43):
to spend those extra fiveminutes.
And I wish it happened moreoften.
I'm working on it.
It's not something I am perfectat.
SPEAKER_04 (22:54):
Yeah,
SPEAKER_03 (22:54):
that's
SPEAKER_04 (22:54):
good.
So with all of these thingswe've talked about, just, I hear
you guys and I know you guys arein mom life, you're leading mom
life groups, but like to themoms out there listening, why do
you think even that being in agroup of moms and being with
other women in a gospel centeredtype community, like, why do you
think that that's important?
And, you know, how has it beenimportant even for you in your
(23:17):
own walk versus trying to kindof do this whole thing on your
own?
SPEAKER_03 (23:20):
Well, I think that there's a difference when you,
between a friend and a spiritualfriendship.
Friends are great.
They're wonderful.
They're a necessity.
We're made to be in community.
But I also think that there ismaybe a tendency in mommy
culture to maybe complain orvent a little bit, and rightly
(23:44):
so sometimes.
It's hard.
But a spiritual friendshipcan...
provide accountability in a way,or maybe reframe a lens that
points back to Jesus that mightreveal a need for more kindness
or grace towards your childrenor your husband or coworker or
whoever that might be.
And that's something I neverreally had until I joined mom
(24:08):
life.
And it's been so refreshing tohave a community that sees me
and accepts me where I'm at andAnd is gracious and, but also
truthful when need be.
SPEAKER_00 (24:23):
Yeah.
I think like the Kayla's pointcommunity is necessary.
Right.
And oftentimes I'll get to apoint in my life where I forget
that.
I'm just very forgetful.
30 minutes go by, and I'm like,oh, it was.
Okay, I got it.
Re-center.
And I think the community at MomLife holds me accountable to
(24:45):
showing up and re-centering andre-remembering what God has done
and what He will do.
I think that it's veryencouraging to be a part of a
community that you know issolely united in that purpose of
re-centering and just growingtowards God in the way that is.
Encouraging and supportive.
SPEAKER_01 (25:05):
And just like-minded women.
Seeing the positive instead ofcomplaining and being in the
word together.
I've been in mom groups who arenot so biblically based.
And it's nice to always pointback to the scripture and in
discussion, like just openingour Bibles and pulling out
(25:26):
scripture and just kind ofsitting in it.
SPEAKER_02 (25:30):
Yeah, because there's this one core thing that
kind of binds us together.
Like even if our particulars aredifferent, whether our kids'
ages are different or married,not married or work or stay at
home, like there's so much oreven how we discipline or where
we choose to send our kids toschool.
Like there is this one bindingtruth.
(25:51):
There's this one binding thingaround God and his good word
that helps us to be even betterencouragers, I think for one
another, Kayla, of what you'retalking about.
Whereas maybe we do take thatmoment and we vent about how
hard and how chaotic and howfast life is.
And then also we have a momentto recenter Alicia, as you were
(26:11):
saying to refocus together.
Okay.
But this is why we're here.
And this is, this is why we dothis mom thing.
You know, this is our purposeand even our jobs and how we
rest, how we have fun, how wevacation, um, That we can just
be true encouragements to eachother.
SPEAKER_04 (26:28):
And I think so often in communities, specifically of
women, but also moms, likeyou're saying, Kayla, there's
this tendency to just stay inthe heart.
And I think my hope for mom lifegroups and my hope for even my
own group of friends, you know,is that...
we can come and we can say, thisis really hard.
(26:50):
We can be authentic.
We can be vulnerable.
We can be all of those things.
And yet I know that those peopleare going to circle me back to
God's word and they're going tocircle me back to the truth.
And I think most importantly,finding people that can be for
you, for your relationship withJesus and for your marriage or
for your parenting and for yourkids.
And like, you're not circlingthe negative, you're circling
(27:12):
the positive and you know, thenegative is going to be there.
And of course you address it,but there's There's this beauty
that comes when we see the worldthat is broken through the lens
of redemption and restorationand all of the things that God
tells us he's about.
And I think there is such, yousaid mommy culture, there is a
culture out there that wants tojust talk about the hard and
(27:36):
circle the hard and never circleback to the Okay, yes, that's
hard.
But what are we going to doabout it?
What are we going to do aboutit?
Are we going to sit here?
And because what happens, we allknow, turns into resentful
bitterness and ick that we justdon't want to live in.
We're just being scared all thetime.
Scared, fear, like, oh, this isnever going to get better.
That is not hopeful and notencouraging to me.
(27:58):
And I don't think it's where Godwants us to live.
And so I think for me, that'swhat I love about
gospel-centered community isjust that it is different.
And then it points us toward thegospel.
And that's the point, right?
And it's not easy to find.
And you won't always find it inevery single situation.
But the hope is that if you arecircling scripture, you will get
(28:22):
there at some point.
SPEAKER_00 (28:24):
I think mom life has a special thing about it too.
Because it's, you know, normallyyou can lead a small group, you
can lead at a church, you canlead at a, you know, big church
where you're having Thousands ofpeople coming, right?
Or whatever it is.
But every year you get into asmaller group.
And you don't know who thoseladies are going to be
(28:44):
necessarily.
But they're always the rightpeople at the right time to do
life with in a way that youdidn't know you needed to.
And I think that's really
SPEAKER_03 (28:53):
encouraging.
I really felt that too, Alicia.
This year I was really blessedto be in a mom life group with
women of different generations.
UNKNOWN (29:03):
Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_03 (29:04):
Multiple generations we spend, there were some ladies
who joined and said, well, mymom days are kind of done, but
I'm a grandma now and I canlearn from this.
And there are moms whose kidsare in college and my kids are
school age and younger.
And on the outside, it mightseem like, yes, we're in
different stages and we don'thave that much in common, but I
(29:27):
think as the year went on, wereally found that there was so
much in common.
And it's been so refreshing tojust be in community with them
and build relationships.
People that I see on Sundays andlove and serve and connect with,
but to really know them has beenso special and life-giving in a
(29:49):
way that I don't know that Iwould have gotten otherwise,
just to learn and grow from eachother.
SPEAKER_02 (29:55):
That's great.
I have learned and grown so muchfrom the three of you and I am
just grateful for Yourfriendship and even just the
deep communications, the deepconversations that we get to
have that once a year we gettogether and really dive in of
what's working and what's not,whether that's in our personal
(30:15):
lives or in homes or marriage oreven in mom life and leading and
ministry.
And it is so fun just to get tolearn from other people.
And I just want to say you'redoing a great job.
Across the board, you're doing agreat job.
And I know all of the moms whoare listening, they can identify
with a lot of the things thatyou are sharing.
And so I am with you.
(30:37):
I have found such value in justbeing together with other moms,
whatever their age or stage oflife.
And there are the days that I...
Don't want to maybe, or I'm tootired or it feels like it
doesn't even, it doesn't makesense in my schedule to take
(30:57):
this hour or two to be together.
But man, when I make thecommitment and I still go anyway
and show up because I knowpeople will, you know, they're
going to be looking for me, notbecause I'm important, but just,
you know, they want to bearound.
They want the community too.
And so they're going to followup and say, where were you?
Like just even thataccountability to help me show
(31:18):
up, you know, then when I gohome, man, I'm just, I'm so glad
that I have gotten to hearstories and I've gotten to be
together and have theencouragement and have the
space.
So do you have any finalencouragement to moms who are
listening, who maybe have thatvery question of like, is it
worth it?
to invest, to build this kind offriendship with other people, to
(31:41):
talk about the deeper or theharder things, to talk about who
God is, to be able to askquestions like, is it worth it
for my time?
How would you encourage them?
SPEAKER_03 (31:52):
Yes.
Yes, 100%.
And you don't have to come witha full face of makeup in like
your best clothes.
Like, come as you are, whereveryou're at in your walk with the
Lord or in your life or yourability to be vulnerable, the
(32:13):
Lord will meet you where you'reat and grow you.
And there's nothing better thanbeing real with other people in
the community.
SPEAKER_01 (32:21):
Yeah, I feel transparency.
Like I went into group this yearin mom life at my kid's school
and being like super intimidatedand just feeling judged which
those were all in my head like Ididn't even have to go there but
I felt like nobody was going totalk like nobody was going to
(32:42):
talk the whole time that waslike my biggest fear but
everybody talked and everybodyjust opened up and I was just
like wow like I don't even knowthese women and they're just
felt so comfortable just toshare so much of their lives and
and the things we had in commonand we have a great group I'm
very blessed
SPEAKER_00 (33:02):
Is it worth it?
Yes.
Yeah, it's worth it.
It's worth it to show up.
It's worth it to put yourselfout there.
It's worth it to do somethingnew if this is new for you.
It's worth it to try again ifyou've done it before.
SPEAKER_02 (33:19):
That's a good word.
And whether you have a full faceof makeup or not, whether this
is your first time or not,whether you are joining a local
mom life group that is insomeone's home or in a church or
in someone's school, becauseHillary, you lead at your kids'
private school, and that's greatof just moms getting together
(33:40):
after they drop off their kids.
Or maybe you just find anotherfriend who lives next door and
just the two of you get togetherand meet on a regular basis,
just Yeah.
And I think that is our heartwith mom life and
SPEAKER_04 (34:10):
why we do what we do.
I mean, we are, as you can tell,we're really excited about our
theme this year.
And just this idea of what itlooks like for moms to really
feel safe and secure.
And so if you're listening tothis and you're like, okay, they
convinced me.
This sounds like something Iwant to do.
There are many, many ways thatMelanie and I can get you
started.
Like she just said, it can be aseasy as a friend at coffee.
(34:35):
And you guys have access toeverything that we provide,
which I'm going to clearly tellyou really quickly what that is.
You will receive teaching videosfor nine months worth of
content.
Every single mom gets a journaland gets resources to use with
that.
And it's that easy.
It is.
We
SPEAKER_02 (34:51):
even give you the questions to answer and talk
about together.
SPEAKER_04 (34:54):
Yes.
You don't even have to come upwith the questions to get
discussions started.
It's all of those things.
And so we want to make it easyfor you to say, Hey neighbor, Do
you want to talk about this?
Do you want to be safe andsecure?
Who doesn't, right?
And so we want to make it thateasy.
And so reach out to us.
There is the opportunity tostart groups, small, in your
(35:15):
home, at your kid's school, inyour church, all the ways.
So we want to hear from you.
SPEAKER_02 (35:21):
Yeah, you can find out all the details in the show
notes, or you can go towww.momlife.org for all of the
ways that you can register tolead or to join a group.
And we would love to see you.
And for those of you who arejust going to continue to follow
along with our podcast, we'regoing to talk about what it
looks like to be safe and secureall next year, starting August
(35:42):
through May, living life withthe Good Shepherd.
Let me pray for you.
Father God, I thank you so muchfor...
Just making moms.
You have made such a beautifulworld and moms are such a
beautiful creation of you.
And so are the dads and so arethe kids and so are the uncles
and the grandparents and thefriends and everybody.
(36:03):
But God, we want to bespecifically grateful for moms
today.
And in just the normal busynessand the rush and the craziness
and the chaos, God, we want totake a deep breath.
And we want to remember that youare with us through it all.
giving us comfort and peace andprotection.
(36:24):
And in those moments that maybewe even do pause for two, three,
four minutes while we're in thecar after having a crazy day,
maybe we don't feel it.
But God, we can still choose totrust that you are good and that
you are true and that you arewith us and just help us to feel
that to get us through the nextfew minutes of today.
(36:46):
God, I pray for the mom whomight be feeling a little bit
lonely and especiallyoverwhelmed that you remind her
even from hearing these storiesfrom Kayla and Alicia and
Hillary that they're not alone,that there are other people who
understand just the overwhelmthat they feel and that it would
be so worth it to just havethese conversations with someone
(37:09):
else to be reminded that God isgood, that they can remind other
people and other people canremind them.
And we love you so much in yourholy and precious name.
Amen.
Welcome to the Mom Life Ministries Podcast.
We're your hosts, Melanie andChristy.
We get it.
Being a mom is messy yet lovelyin a very real way, whatever
your age or season ofmotherhood, and we want to talk
about it all.
SPEAKER_04 (00:15):
We certainly aren't experts at this mom thing, but
we'll share what we're learning,how Jesus has encouraged us all
along the way on this journeythat we call Mom Life.
SPEAKER_02 (00:25):
Hey friends, welcome.
We are currently at the Mom LifePlanning Retreat where we are
planning all of our curriculumand content for this next year.
And we have a whole team ofgreat women who are helping us
do that.
And so today we have threespecific friends from some
different places who are goingto share a little bit of their
story about why mom life hasbeen important to them and even
(00:48):
why specifically with ourupcoming theme of safe and
secure that it would be justreally great.
for you to join in to a mom lifecommunity near you.
So friends, why don't you takejust a moment and introduce
yourselves?
SPEAKER_03 (01:02):
Hi, my name is Kayla Stevens.
I am a mom of four little kidsranging in ages from seven to 16
months.
I work from home full time and Ilove that because I get to kind
of dabble in both worlds ofbeing home with my kids and
also, you know, work for myfamily.
(01:22):
I've been a part of MomLifesince 2020, so about five years
now.
And I just finished my firstyear leading a MomLife group at
my local church.
SPEAKER_00 (01:33):
Hi, my name is Elsha Mullenix.
I am a mom of three boys.
They are seven, five, and two.
I've been married for almostnine years.
And I've been with MomLife forabout five years, too, give or
take.
And I also lead a group in mycommunity at our church.
SPEAKER_01 (01:52):
Hello, my name is Hillary Boyd.
I have been with MomLife forabout three years.
I was involved in MomLife atGrace for two, and then I lead
at my kids' school.
I have three kids.
I have a 14-year-old girl, a12-year-old boy, and an
8-year-old boy.
SPEAKER_04 (02:13):
So leading into this year, just where you sit as a
mom right now, what are some ofthe biggest distractions or
pressures you feel in thisseason?
SPEAKER_01 (02:23):
Like Kayla, working from home.
I also work from home.
I didn't mention that.
So that was recent this year.
I have been home with my kidsfor eight years straight.
And then I started workingagain, going back to work full
time.
So I committed to mom life.
(02:44):
And then I got a job.
So that was hard.
But it's all worked out.
And God is good.
And I've been able to do both.
UNKNOWN (02:51):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (02:51):
Even just that transition from staying home to
getting a job.
I mean, that's a big deal.
That's a huge change in yourdaily routine.
But then also just how yourelate with your family, you
know, and getting everybody onboard because it's just for
everybody, not just for you,which is hard.
SPEAKER_04 (03:10):
I think, too, the idea that you said, hey, I'm
going to leave this mom lifegroup and then got a job.
It would have been easy for youto say, maybe not.
But I love that God was justlike, opening up the margin for
you to do both.
And I think that that'ssomething I think about a lot in
my own journey is if I look ateverything as too big or too
(03:31):
hard or too much, I don't leaveroom for him to do the things
that only he can do.
SPEAKER_01 (03:37):
And a huge blessing is my job is so flexible.
I was able to be like, hey, I'mnot going to be available for
this chunk of time.
And yeah.
It was, it was just, it was,there's so many blessings in
that.
It's not just like the hardthing.
It was that I was able to doboth.
SPEAKER_00 (03:57):
I think one of the biggest distractions for me has
just been that my kids aregetting older.
So we're in school andactivities and it's just a lot.
I also work from home part-time,but also have a two and a
five-year-old that's with me allthe time.
And then just trying to juggle,you know, the volunteer things
(04:19):
that I do, I work at my church.
Um, so just trying to juggleevery aspect of that and doing
that well, um, sometimes it's,it's hard.
Um, but it's fun watching Godshow up and be like, I'm enough.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_03 (04:34):
So my kids are seven, five, three and 16
months.
So period.
Yeah.
It's my pressure is that, It'sso hard to be everything for
everybody.
I guess the end answer to thatis I can't.
(04:56):
And they're all in differentstages and phases and it's
wonderful.
But I think I get caught up inthe nitty gritty of packing the
lunch, changing a diaper.
Did you wipe your face?
Did you comb your hair?
And it's kind of all consumingsometimes, just even getting
people out the door in themornings.
And it's really easy to get.
(05:17):
lost in all of the little todo's of that.
That being said, mom life haskind of been like a light for me
in that busy distraction whereif I'm not filling my cup, if
I'm not setting aside time tofocus on my relationship with
the Lord first, then I can'tmeet everyone else's needs.
SPEAKER_02 (05:40):
Yeah, that's good.
Because the next question that Iwant to ask is how does the
speed and chaos of life impactyour ability to be present with
your family and with God,because I think everything that
you guys have shared issomething that every mom can
identify with, that we have thisunique pressure to try and hold
(06:01):
the world together.
I mean, our little world of ourhome and our family, but
sometimes we take on even morethan that.
And so with all of the pressureand the busyness, because I
think that every day seems to bemoving maybe even a little bit
faster and faster and faster andfaster.
And so how does that impact yourability?
(06:22):
I mean, you brought up first ofyour relationship with Jesus.
Like how does it, how does itimpact you being present with
God?
SPEAKER_03 (06:29):
Oh man, I think it's easy to focus on all the things
you're not doing.
You know, like I've oftenstruggled with feeling like,
okay, here's a podcast I canlisten to, or here's a quiet
time basket, or here's a book Ican read.
And all those are great tools.
(06:49):
But if I'm actually not inscripture every day, just for a
little bit, then those toolsdon't mean anything.
I can listen to someone talkabout it, but I'm actually
connecting with it.
So I think the biggest thing forme right now in this time that's
been helpful is just to find onething, even if it's like
(07:11):
listening to a dwell dailydevotional in the car.
That's my life.
If that's how I get scripturethat day, that's, that's going
to meet me right there.
SPEAKER_04 (07:20):
I think there's this idea too, that it has to be this
like long time in scripture.
And I think if you have thetime, of course, great, like
spend hours in scripture everyday.
But for most of us, thisbusyness and this chaos and
speed is, we don't always havethat much time.
And I think one of the things Ihear you saying, Kayla, I know
(07:41):
for me, it's often, what can Ido right now for these five
minutes I have in the car thatcan bring me back to the
presence of God and remind me,because He's always there, but
remind me of His presence.
And I might could do that threeor four times in the day, right?
And so maybe it is, I open myBible in the morning, but then
in the car, I listen tosomething else.
(08:02):
And then later in the day, Ilook at my scripture memory card
or something, you know, like Ithink that's the importance of
being present with God in theselittle moments might be the best
thing we can do in the chaos.
SPEAKER_00 (08:14):
I often, I mean, our days look like we're going, you
know, we hit the ground runningand every minute is accounted
for in a way that is likeoverwhelming.
And so I think about, you know,how can I find the minutes or
the time to be like,Intentional.
(08:35):
And so this year we've talked alot about, you know, margin and
creating that margin and thatbuffer space because our to-do
list gets so long and I losesight very quickly of why am I
even doing the to-do list, youknow?
And so you think, oh, okay, Iprobably do need to get these
tasks done, but with whatpurpose?
(08:56):
And I think, you know, holdingGod-centered and clinging to
that safety and securityrecenters me.
In those minutes of margin, I'msaying, okay, this is the
purpose.
How can I do that well and toglorify God?
SPEAKER_01 (09:10):
For me, it's like there's too much chaos when the
kids get up.
So it's being disciplined for meto get up before the kids,
which, let's face it, is noteasy.
to get up early.
I almost
SPEAKER_02 (09:25):
feel, I almost feel like, yeah, you and I, we texted
each other for a while.
Yeah.
Are you up?
Are you up?
For some accountability, butit's almost like sometimes I get
up early and then my child getsup earlier that day and it's so
frustrating.
But yeah, it's difficult to findthose times of maybe I don't
have it during the day.
How can I create it?
(09:45):
Well, that's getting up earlier.
Yeah.
It's tough.
SPEAKER_01 (09:49):
And someone marches down the stairs and wants to sit
and talk to you and you're like,All right.
I guess I'll have to wait tilllater, but yeah, like just being
a good steward of my time andtrying to fit it all in.
And that's looked different forme this year with having a
full-time job and, um, doing momlife, you know, all the things
we're all busy.
(10:10):
We all don't have enough time,but, um, being intentional when
I do have it.
SPEAKER_04 (10:15):
It's like telling your time where to go.
We've talked about that before,but I think The other thing you
said that was important andpart, I think part of this
question too is how does thespeed and the chaos of life keep
us from being present with ourfamily even?
And I think sometimes we forgetthat when they come and
interrupt the quiet time, likethey're not a distraction.
(10:37):
And it is very much God's way ofsaying, Hey, this right now is
the most important.
So to your point, you know, ofjust the to-do list and the
tasks, you know, like, Yes, theylikely need to get done.
But at what cost?
And I think that's the questionI have to ask myself a lot.
I'm a very task-oriented listkind of girl.
And it's like, no, like, yes,this thing needs to get done,
(10:59):
but it could be tomorrow or itcould be next week.
Or if you wait long enough, itmight be never.
Like it might not be asimportant as I thought it was.
And I think being present to Godand being present with our
people that he's put in front ofus will help us shape what is
most important on that list
SPEAKER_01 (11:20):
to do.
What was the guy's name thatspoke?
Josh.
Yes.
So I listened to his podcast andhe, what stuck with me that he
said was with kids, it's caught,not taught.
And that's like with mydevotional time in the morning,
like my kids see me do that.
And that was the same way withmy grandparents.
I saw them get up early in themorning and do that.
(11:42):
And then I see my daughter doingit too.
And yeah, It's just like, itwasn't something I taught her.
It just is something she just isfollowing.
SPEAKER_02 (11:52):
So Psalm 23 describes God as our shepherd.
And John 10 says that Jesus iscalling himself the good
shepherd.
And so what does this image ofGod as shepherd, what does that
mean for you?
SPEAKER_00 (12:05):
As you read through John 10, when Jesus is talking
about being the good shepherd,he says that he knows his sheep
by name.
This level of, He wants, Heknows us.
And He knows each of us.
And that level of relationshipis just so crucial.
(12:27):
And the intimacy that He has andHe desires for us, I think, is
just so profound.
Because I look at the peoplearound me and I think, I don't
know why He loves me.
But God does.
In spite of who we are, He lovesus.
And I think that's prettyamazing.
SPEAKER_02 (12:46):
In the midst of all the pressures, in the midst of
all of the to-do lists, in themidst of just trying to figure
it out and find the pockets oftime and to teach and model for
our kids what to do well, yet wecan very easily have these
voices of insecurity and notenoughness rise up.
And so this reminder that Jesusas our shepherd knows us by
(13:10):
name, that, yeah, it'sincredibly profound.
SPEAKER_03 (13:15):
Yeah.
Jesus as the good shepherd isbeautiful and amazing.
And when you hear it, you'relike, yes, I want that.
I want that in my life.
But when you really go into it,that requires a lot of surrender
of control.
And if I'm being honest, growingup, there's a lot of things in
(13:35):
my life that were out ofcontrol.
And so I sought to rectify thatas a little kid through
achievement and, and controllingwhat I could within my own self.
Now, as an adult and as someonewho maybe started truly
following the Lord a little bitlater in life, that requires me
(13:58):
to surrender my control, tosurrender my anxiety.
And Jesus is the good shepherd.
You know, the shepherd knowswhere he's going, but the sheep
doesn't.
And that's, That's scary to mein ways knowing I don't know
where I'm going to go.
I have to lay down my idea ofwhat I want for my kids, for my
(14:20):
family, my picture of good.
But I have seen the fruits ofdoing that and that his good is
so much better than I could haveever imagined.
So I say that, but it's a workin progress.
SPEAKER_04 (14:33):
I think it always will be.
a work in progress.
I think that's part of ourjourney as a sheep, right?
Is that like we follow for awhile and we might trail off and
then we get back on the path.
And I resonate with your ideathat like it requires so much
surrender and it's scary andthat's scary to me.
(14:55):
But what I've come to morelately in my journey is it's
actually so freeing To know thatlike, if I let go of control and
truly let go of control, there'sthis level of safety and rest
that comes when it's like, oh, Idon't have to be in control.
(15:15):
He can do that.
And which leads me to thisbeautiful place of rest.
And back to why we're talkingabout this this year, this place
of safety and security that I solong for, that my heart wants.
But the only way to it, right,is surrender.
That's so hard.
(15:35):
And I don't like it.
And I fight it a lot.
But when I do it, I see whatthat feels like.
And it's an experience youalmost have to do before you
know that that comes on theother side.
SPEAKER_02 (15:51):
Yeah, because control and predictable
outcomes, that's what feels safeand secure.
Because I can know what's comingor I can manipulate it to be
that good that I need or that Ithink that I want.
And so it feels completelybackwards to say I'm going to
release that and live every daywith open hands, surrendering my
(16:13):
control to the Lord.
I'm even just talking about itand getting uncomfortable.
It's such a hard thing.
thing to do on a regular basisbecause it doesn't necessarily
feel safe.
And at the same time, this trustthat we have a good shepherd who
not only knows yesterday, today,and tomorrow until the end of
(16:35):
time, but he also, Alicia, asyou said, he knows our name.
He has counted, as Psalm 139says, he has numbered every hair
on our head.
He is...
He counted the grains of sand.
He, as Job talks about, he tellsthe waves when to come in and
when to go out and the stormswhen to roll in.
(16:56):
Like, man, that's, yes, you cancontrol.
SPEAKER_04 (17:17):
He knows every hair on their heads.
He also knows their days.
And he goes before, behind, youknow, all the things.
And that also brings me such alevel of security to know that,
like, I might not know, like yousaid, Caleb, but he does.
And so I can rest in that.
(17:37):
It's comforting to me in someways and very hard.
I say that really sweet andnicely.
But the truth of the everyday,when things feel out of my
control, it's really hard andit's really messy, but I know it
to be true.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (17:53):
So in the busyness and the chaos that we've already
talked about, that makes itchallenging to find the time and
to slow down, to experience thepresence of God.
Like we're acknowledging thatthat is challenging as busy
moms, but also as you have hadthose moments of experiencing
it, how has the peace and theprovision changed?
(18:15):
that God has provided in thosemoments, how has it impacted
your just everyday life ofmotherhood?
SPEAKER_01 (18:22):
I've read the 23rd Psalm several, several times,
being raised in church.
And today in our quiet times atthe retreat, I kind of got stuck
on where David says, your rodand your staff, they comfort me.
And we were talking about therod and the staff And it's
(18:43):
correction, right?
They use that not to hit thesheep, but to just gently move
them over.
And then the correction throughthe valleys of the shadow of
death, but also to the pastures,the green pastures, where you
feel safe and secure, where youfeel at peace.
(19:04):
And that's been my whole life,not just through motherhood.
God has just corrected me verygently.
Sometimes not.
He's always been there with me.
And that makes me think of therod and the staff comfort me and
kind of pushed me through it.
Like,
SPEAKER_04 (19:21):
come on, keep going.
Well, and I think it'sinteresting too, that imagery,
even in itself, the rod and thestaff represent this protection
of God, right?
Which is what you're saying oflike, come on, let's come back
on this path.
This is more safe.
Going too far.
Right?
This is a safer path.
But then there's the provisionof the Lord too.
And that is that the shepherdsspecifically use it to like,
(19:42):
knock fruit out of trees andlike different things for food
and like provision.
And I think it's just so cool tothink about the fact that He is
all of those things.
You know, He can protect and Hecan correct and He can guide and
He can lead and He can provide.
The Lord is my shepherd.
I have everything I need and allof those things together.
(20:03):
Mm-hmm.
We resist the correction.
(20:24):
We resist the guidance.
We resist.
Or we look other places for it.
And I think that's just natural.
But then when it happens, thechaos comes.
And we don't feel at peace.
And we don't feel the joy.
And I'm guilty of it.
I do it all the time.
One day it's like walking rightalong.
And it's great.
And the shepherd's leading.
And then the next day it's like,what am I doing?
How did I get over here?
(20:45):
Oh, wait.
I remember what that was like.
Let me go back.
SPEAKER_02 (20:47):
Somebody this weekend was talking about about
how like when she's alone she'skind of just on alert you know
she's really paying attention toher surroundings and who's here
and what's going to happen butwhen she's with her husband
she's she's at rest.
She knows that he's going totake care of that.
He's going to be the one kind ofon alert and paying attention to
(21:10):
where they're going and whatthey're doing next.
And so just the safety and thecomfort that comes from knowing
that he is with her.
And so I thought that was such agood picture or whatever your
safe person is, that there isjust this natural comfort and I
can let go.
I can surrender because I amwith this person that I trust
with my whole heart and my verylife.
(21:31):
And so I know that they're goingto take care of me, whatever
comes.
And so I think that that's it.
When we do slow down to be withJesus, as you're talking about,
and have that ride and thatstaff, but just experience that
comfort.
That's everything.
When you take the moment to bewith Jesus, what are the
(21:53):
benefits?
How have you reaped the benefitof that?
SPEAKER_03 (21:56):
I think I was talking this weekend with you,
Christy, about how sometimes Ifeel like I just miss it.
I'm just...
in such the busy moments,especially at bedtime, trying to
get them all bathed and clothedand tucking them in.
And then I'm so tired.
I miss that connection piece.
But I think the same thing issaid when we just brush by our
(22:20):
connection time with Jesus, wejust miss it.
And taking those little moments,even if it's like sitting in my
car for an extra five minutesafter I get home from the
grocery store.
We all know what that's like.
Right?
To like just pray or listen toscripture.
That really does sustain me andit gives me the extra strength
(22:43):
to spend those extra fiveminutes.
And I wish it happened moreoften.
I'm working on it.
It's not something I am perfectat.
SPEAKER_04 (22:54):
Yeah,
SPEAKER_03 (22:54):
that's
SPEAKER_04 (22:54):
good.
So with all of these thingswe've talked about, just, I hear
you guys and I know you guys arein mom life, you're leading mom
life groups, but like to themoms out there listening, why do
you think even that being in agroup of moms and being with
other women in a gospel centeredtype community, like, why do you
think that that's important?
And, you know, how has it beenimportant even for you in your
(23:17):
own walk versus trying to kindof do this whole thing on your
own?
SPEAKER_03 (23:20):
Well, I think that there's a difference when you,
between a friend and a spiritualfriendship.
Friends are great.
They're wonderful.
They're a necessity.
We're made to be in community.
But I also think that there ismaybe a tendency in mommy
culture to maybe complain orvent a little bit, and rightly
(23:44):
so sometimes.
It's hard.
But a spiritual friendshipcan...
provide accountability in a way,or maybe reframe a lens that
points back to Jesus that mightreveal a need for more kindness
or grace towards your childrenor your husband or coworker or
whoever that might be.
And that's something I neverreally had until I joined mom
(24:08):
life.
And it's been so refreshing tohave a community that sees me
and accepts me where I'm at andAnd is gracious and, but also
truthful when need be.
SPEAKER_00 (24:23):
Yeah.
I think like the Kayla's pointcommunity is necessary.
Right.
And oftentimes I'll get to apoint in my life where I forget
that.
I'm just very forgetful.
30 minutes go by, and I'm like,oh, it was.
Okay, I got it.
Re-center.
And I think the community at MomLife holds me accountable to
(24:45):
showing up and re-centering andre-remembering what God has done
and what He will do.
I think that it's veryencouraging to be a part of a
community that you know issolely united in that purpose of
re-centering and just growingtowards God in the way that is.
Encouraging and supportive.
SPEAKER_01 (25:05):
And just like-minded women.
Seeing the positive instead ofcomplaining and being in the
word together.
I've been in mom groups who arenot so biblically based.
And it's nice to always pointback to the scripture and in
discussion, like just openingour Bibles and pulling out
(25:26):
scripture and just kind ofsitting in it.
SPEAKER_02 (25:30):
Yeah, because there's this one core thing that
kind of binds us together.
Like even if our particulars aredifferent, whether our kids'
ages are different or married,not married or work or stay at
home, like there's so much oreven how we discipline or where
we choose to send our kids toschool.
Like there is this one bindingtruth.
(25:51):
There's this one binding thingaround God and his good word
that helps us to be even betterencouragers, I think for one
another, Kayla, of what you'retalking about.
Whereas maybe we do take thatmoment and we vent about how
hard and how chaotic and howfast life is.
And then also we have a momentto recenter Alicia, as you were
(26:11):
saying to refocus together.
Okay.
But this is why we're here.
And this is, this is why we dothis mom thing.
You know, this is our purposeand even our jobs and how we
rest, how we have fun, how wevacation, um, That we can just
be true encouragements to eachother.
SPEAKER_04 (26:28):
And I think so often in communities, specifically of
women, but also moms, likeyou're saying, Kayla, there's
this tendency to just stay inthe heart.
And I think my hope for mom lifegroups and my hope for even my
own group of friends, you know,is that...
we can come and we can say, thisis really hard.
(26:50):
We can be authentic.
We can be vulnerable.
We can be all of those things.
And yet I know that those peopleare going to circle me back to
God's word and they're going tocircle me back to the truth.
And I think most importantly,finding people that can be for
you, for your relationship withJesus and for your marriage or
for your parenting and for yourkids.
And like, you're not circlingthe negative, you're circling
(27:12):
the positive and you know, thenegative is going to be there.
And of course you address it,but there's There's this beauty
that comes when we see the worldthat is broken through the lens
of redemption and restorationand all of the things that God
tells us he's about.
And I think there is such, yousaid mommy culture, there is a
culture out there that wants tojust talk about the hard and
(27:36):
circle the hard and never circleback to the Okay, yes, that's
hard.
But what are we going to doabout it?
What are we going to do aboutit?
Are we going to sit here?
And because what happens, we allknow, turns into resentful
bitterness and ick that we justdon't want to live in.
We're just being scared all thetime.
Scared, fear, like, oh, this isnever going to get better.
That is not hopeful and notencouraging to me.
(27:58):
And I don't think it's where Godwants us to live.
And so I think for me, that'swhat I love about
gospel-centered community isjust that it is different.
And then it points us toward thegospel.
And that's the point, right?
And it's not easy to find.
And you won't always find it inevery single situation.
But the hope is that if you arecircling scripture, you will get
(28:22):
there at some point.
SPEAKER_00 (28:24):
I think mom life has a special thing about it too.
Because it's, you know, normallyyou can lead a small group, you
can lead at a church, you canlead at a, you know, big church
where you're having Thousands ofpeople coming, right?
Or whatever it is.
But every year you get into asmaller group.
And you don't know who thoseladies are going to be
(28:44):
necessarily.
But they're always the rightpeople at the right time to do
life with in a way that youdidn't know you needed to.
And I think that's really
SPEAKER_03 (28:53):
encouraging.
I really felt that too, Alicia.
This year I was really blessedto be in a mom life group with
women of different generations.
UNKNOWN (29:03):
Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_03 (29:04):
Multiple generations we spend, there were some ladies
who joined and said, well, mymom days are kind of done, but
I'm a grandma now and I canlearn from this.
And there are moms whose kidsare in college and my kids are
school age and younger.
And on the outside, it mightseem like, yes, we're in
different stages and we don'thave that much in common, but I
(29:27):
think as the year went on, wereally found that there was so
much in common.
And it's been so refreshing tojust be in community with them
and build relationships.
People that I see on Sundays andlove and serve and connect with,
but to really know them has beenso special and life-giving in a
(29:49):
way that I don't know that Iwould have gotten otherwise,
just to learn and grow from eachother.
SPEAKER_02 (29:55):
That's great.
I have learned and grown so muchfrom the three of you and I am
just grateful for Yourfriendship and even just the
deep communications, the deepconversations that we get to
have that once a year we gettogether and really dive in of
what's working and what's not,whether that's in our personal
(30:15):
lives or in homes or marriage oreven in mom life and leading and
ministry.
And it is so fun just to get tolearn from other people.
And I just want to say you'redoing a great job.
Across the board, you're doing agreat job.
And I know all of the moms whoare listening, they can identify
with a lot of the things thatyou are sharing.
And so I am with you.
(30:37):
I have found such value in justbeing together with other moms,
whatever their age or stage oflife.
And there are the days that I...
Don't want to maybe, or I'm tootired or it feels like it
doesn't even, it doesn't makesense in my schedule to take
(30:57):
this hour or two to be together.
But man, when I make thecommitment and I still go anyway
and show up because I knowpeople will, you know, they're
going to be looking for me, notbecause I'm important, but just,
you know, they want to bearound.
They want the community too.
And so they're going to followup and say, where were you?
Like just even thataccountability to help me show
(31:18):
up, you know, then when I gohome, man, I'm just, I'm so glad
that I have gotten to hearstories and I've gotten to be
together and have theencouragement and have the
space.
So do you have any finalencouragement to moms who are
listening, who maybe have thatvery question of like, is it
worth it?
to invest, to build this kind offriendship with other people, to
(31:41):
talk about the deeper or theharder things, to talk about who
God is, to be able to askquestions like, is it worth it
for my time?
How would you encourage them?
SPEAKER_03 (31:52):
Yes.
Yes, 100%.
And you don't have to come witha full face of makeup in like
your best clothes.
Like, come as you are, whereveryou're at in your walk with the
Lord or in your life or yourability to be vulnerable, the
(32:13):
Lord will meet you where you'reat and grow you.
And there's nothing better thanbeing real with other people in
the community.
SPEAKER_01 (32:21):
Yeah, I feel transparency.
Like I went into group this yearin mom life at my kid's school
and being like super intimidatedand just feeling judged which
those were all in my head like Ididn't even have to go there but
I felt like nobody was going totalk like nobody was going to
(32:42):
talk the whole time that waslike my biggest fear but
everybody talked and everybodyjust opened up and I was just
like wow like I don't even knowthese women and they're just
felt so comfortable just toshare so much of their lives and
and the things we had in commonand we have a great group I'm
very blessed
SPEAKER_00 (33:02):
Is it worth it?
Yes.
Yeah, it's worth it.
It's worth it to show up.
It's worth it to put yourselfout there.
It's worth it to do somethingnew if this is new for you.
It's worth it to try again ifyou've done it before.
SPEAKER_02 (33:19):
That's a good word.
And whether you have a full faceof makeup or not, whether this
is your first time or not,whether you are joining a local
mom life group that is insomeone's home or in a church or
in someone's school, becauseHillary, you lead at your kids'
private school, and that's greatof just moms getting together
(33:40):
after they drop off their kids.
Or maybe you just find anotherfriend who lives next door and
just the two of you get togetherand meet on a regular basis,
just Yeah.
And I think that is our heartwith mom life and
SPEAKER_04 (34:10):
why we do what we do.
I mean, we are, as you can tell,we're really excited about our
theme this year.
And just this idea of what itlooks like for moms to really
feel safe and secure.
And so if you're listening tothis and you're like, okay, they
convinced me.
This sounds like something Iwant to do.
There are many, many ways thatMelanie and I can get you
started.
Like she just said, it can be aseasy as a friend at coffee.
(34:35):
And you guys have access toeverything that we provide,
which I'm going to clearly tellyou really quickly what that is.
You will receive teaching videosfor nine months worth of
content.
Every single mom gets a journaland gets resources to use with
that.
And it's that easy.
It is.
We
SPEAKER_02 (34:51):
even give you the questions to answer and talk
about together.
SPEAKER_04 (34:54):
Yes.
You don't even have to come upwith the questions to get
discussions started.
It's all of those things.
And so we want to make it easyfor you to say, Hey neighbor, Do
you want to talk about this?
Do you want to be safe andsecure?
Who doesn't, right?
And so we want to make it thateasy.
And so reach out to us.
There is the opportunity tostart groups, small, in your
(35:15):
home, at your kid's school, inyour church, all the ways.
So we want to hear from you.
SPEAKER_02 (35:21):
Yeah, you can find out all the details in the show
notes, or you can go towww.momlife.org for all of the
ways that you can register tolead or to join a group.
And we would love to see you.
And for those of you who arejust going to continue to follow
along with our podcast, we'regoing to talk about what it
looks like to be safe and secureall next year, starting August
(35:42):
through May, living life withthe Good Shepherd.
Let me pray for you.
Father God, I thank you so muchfor...
Just making moms.
You have made such a beautifulworld and moms are such a
beautiful creation of you.
And so are the dads and so arethe kids and so are the uncles
and the grandparents and thefriends and everybody.
(36:03):
But God, we want to bespecifically grateful for moms
today.
And in just the normal busynessand the rush and the craziness
and the chaos, God, we want totake a deep breath.
And we want to remember that youare with us through it all.
giving us comfort and peace andprotection.
(36:24):
And in those moments that maybewe even do pause for two, three,
four minutes while we're in thecar after having a crazy day,
maybe we don't feel it.
But God, we can still choose totrust that you are good and that
you are true and that you arewith us and just help us to feel
that to get us through the nextfew minutes of today.
(36:46):
God, I pray for the mom whomight be feeling a little bit
lonely and especiallyoverwhelmed that you remind her
even from hearing these storiesfrom Kayla and Alicia and
Hillary that they're not alone,that there are other people who
understand just the overwhelmthat they feel and that it would
be so worth it to just havethese conversations with someone
(37:09):
else to be reminded that God isgood, that they can remind other
people and other people canremind them.
And we love you so much in yourholy and precious name.
Amen.
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