March 12, 2025 • 44 mins
When a mysterious figure appears among the chaos of a town gathering, nothing is as it seems. The assassination of Zhang plunges the courtyard into madness as shadowy beings begin their assault on the citizens of the town. While others see only soldiers, Vance and Dolomir glimpse the truth - ethereal shadows with deadly cold hands moving through the crowd, turning each victim into one of their own.
Fleeing to Essel's church provides only temporary sanctuary as our heroes discover the terrifying reality: these beings aren't undead creatures that can be turned away by divine power. They're something else entirely, manipulated by a tall woman with extraordinary illusion abilities. "I can be whoever I want to be," she claims, demonstrating her power by transforming into various people before their eyes.
The woman presents our heroes with a chilling choice - surrender themselves to her or watch as everyone in the town perishes. Despite their mistrust, they reluctantly agree, finding themselves transported through a void where time loses all meaning. What follows is an unsettling interrogation where the woman reveals her fascination with their unique ability to see through her illusions, suggesting they possess rare qualities that make them valuable to her mysterious "people."
As pain and confusion mount, both Vance and Dolomir discover something profound within themselves - the power to reject illusions entirely. Vance's connection to divine forces and Dolomir's fey ancestry become their salvation, allowing them to break free and return to Essel's church. But their ordeal has changed them, marked by glowing red eyes before consciousness slips away.
What connection do our heroes share with this powerful illusionist? Who are her "people" seeking strategic footholds? And what does the transformation signified by those red eyes mean for their future? Subscribe now to follow Vance and Dolomir's journey as they face dangers both seen and unseen.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Propaganda does not deceive people.
It merely helps them to deceivethemselves.
Eric Hoffer, Previously onMonster Monster.
Our heroes found themselves atthe doorsteps of chaos as the
vote to join Sol Deus was haltedby the king and a mysterious
figure.
Moments later, Zhang was slainas the crowd grows panicked and
heads begin to fall.
(00:20):
Welcome to Monster Monster.
Hello everybody, my name isTyler Waltzz and I'll be your dm
and to my left hey everybody,I'm tyson cox.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
I'll be playing vance .
He's a a cleric.
He uh, you know, just wants towalk around and help.
But you know, sometimes yougotta hurt a little to help a
little yeah, a harm assist typea harm assist and to my right
yeah, yeah, I'm Brian Petrie.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Everybody what's happening?
I'm playing Dolan Mir Sedrin.
Everybody call me Dolo.
I don't do a lot.
I grew up in kind of like theslums of Sector 3, or whatever
they want to call that place,and I just kind of I got to get
by as I get by.
You know, get it how you live,figure it out All right, and
(01:07):
with that we're going to getstarted.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
As in the recap, it is now chaos, as shadowy figures
begin to appear all over thecrowd as Zhang falls to the
ground.
If I remember correctly, brian,you passed the perception check
to actually be able to seethese shadows.
However, vance, you did not.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Mm-mm.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
So I need Vance to start this session with a wisdom
saving throw.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
Oh, ha, ha, ha, ha A hot four on the die.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Okay, this is very interesting.
I'm very curious how this isgoing to go out.
I need you to take fivenecrotic damage.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Am I just getting like poked by stuff?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
I can't see as an icy hand is placed on your back.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Oh, it's like, it's like your girlfriend when she
puts like she's like my feet arecold and then puts your feet on
your back, yeah yeah, Exceptyou're dying.
Oh, this isn't like a fun goof.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
It's the same date a lady with low iron and poor
circulation so, as the handpushes against your back, it
feels very forceful, and then italmost just appears to go
inside your back as you feel,the cold now seem to push on the
front of your chest.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
I think I'm having a heart attack.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Now's the time.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
I'm coming.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Dolomir, I need you to roll the same, but with
advantage.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Hey All right.
Roll 15.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Okay, I was about to say we're celebrating, but we
still don't know if you passed.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
No, no, no, just guess, Tyler.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
Yeah.
Okay, I was about to say we'recelebrating but we still don't
know if you passed.
No, no, no, just guess Tyler,yeah, okay so you take nine
halved.
Round it down, because I'mgentle.
Because, he likes you.
As you start to feel the handpress against your back, you
notice in time and turn aroundto see what looks like a knight
completely engulfed in shadowsaround you.
Can I get you guys to rollinitiative to see how this plays
(03:06):
out?
Speaker 3 (03:07):
Yeah, 11 on the die, so 10.
Seven.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Seven and 10.
All righty, so we will actuallystart with the 10.
Wow, you just had some necroticdamage hit you.
How do you want to respond?
You still don't see anythinggoing on in the crowd Right now.
As far as you can tell, sold a,and soldiers are the ones that
are slaying people in the crowd.
Speaker 3 (03:29):
So you said I felt necrotic damage, but I can't see
anything Correct.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
And there is a pressure now building on your
chest, as it feels likesomething's pushing out.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to like, turn
like Constantine, where, uh, I'mjust going to hold up my hammer
and channel divinity and turnundead.
Okay, cool, get off me you damnastards, you damn astards.
Bastards, you almost got it out.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
He's cold.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
Bastards.
Okay, so when you channeldivinity, what exactly does it
do?
Speaker 3 (04:02):
DC 12 saving throw DC 12 saving throw.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
What if they're not undead?
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Then nothing oh.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Nothing noticeable happens, as you still feel the
pressure On your chest.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
God damn it.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
Does that take up your whole turn?
Shove, roll me a perception.
Or arcana, check eight, eight.
Okay, you still cannot seethese beings, but you see more
soldans flood into the crowdthese soldans got real cold
hands or something dude yeah,dolemir.
You see that now the shadowsmatch one for one for each
(04:41):
person in the crowd, as more arearound the castle.
It is now your turn.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Everybody's cursed.
They all curse, like in general.
No, everybody's ghosts, I cansee them.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
There's also one right behind you.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
There's one behind me .
Speaker 1 (05:04):
You know that one that touched your back thought
it was my ex.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
But you know what we're gonna go with.
It's a ghost, because I seenothing but ghost.
Uh, you know what I'm gonna do?
I'm going to, um, how far isaway.
How far away is the one wherehe is from me?
Speaker 1 (05:21):
oh, you guys were standing right next.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Oh, we're right next to each other so the one that
touched him is like right thereyou can literally see its arm.
I'm gonna take my meat cleaverand see if I can cut its hand oh
, okay, cool, give me a arcanacheck.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Hopefully somebody can learn something about these
things I.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
yeah, you think I know I am good, I relent.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Yeah, can you just throw the rocks better on the
table that have numbers on them,please?
That's a 12.
Trying to progress a story here.
12 succeeds, then don't make meroll.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
That's the rule, yeah .
Speaker 1 (06:04):
So the meat cleaver passes completely through the
shadow, and though it doesn'tlook like it did damage, it did
sever the connection with Vance.
So the cold has now left yourchest and the pressure is now
gone.
What you saw was a Saldayansoldier behind you get his hand
cut off.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Oh, I'm going to just start rocking soldiers.
Next turn, just going ham onthese bitches.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
It is now the shadow's turn, as the first one
gets a 16 on you, vance.
Yeah, that'll do it, that'll doit.
You're going to take threepsychic damage as one takes a
swing at Dolomir for a 15.
Yeah, he hits and you take fivepsychic damage.
Shit Now, vance.
(06:51):
When you get hit, you get tomake another perception check.
Okay, 17.
17, okay, so you actually startto see behind the illusion.
You haven't completely clearedout and seen all of them in the
crowd, but in your directvicinity you can now see that
(07:13):
some of these soldiers areactually shadows.
Well, this is bad.
Good input yeah, people aredying and you're like I don't
think this is on the up and upsomething fishy's going on start
.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
start cutting at their feet.
You're closer.
All right, look out ankles, I'mgoing to get you.
No, seriously, swing at theirfucking feet, I will.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Is it my turn.
Yeah we're back up at the top Iwill I start swinging.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
Yeah, I'm screaming for my health over here.
Speaker 3 (07:43):
I just do that thing from the Kingsman where it's
just chaos is all around, andI'm just gonna start going ham
and crushing toes Like thechurch one.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Yeah, all right, yeah , make me a couple of attacks.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I only have one at my level.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Oh yeah, you do 18.
Cool, all righty, thatdefinitely hits.
Roll me your damage.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
That is gonna be, ooh seven.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Okay, yeah, you completely take out the knees on
this shadow.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Yeah gross.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Yeah, it's just a shadow, so it just kind of poofs
away and they fall.
Speaker 3 (08:13):
Unsatisfying.
Yeah well, Now he's my height.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I poke him in the eyes Like Cotton from King of
the Hill.
Yeah, took his shins out, butwith that we are now back to you
, Dolomir.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yeah, what's going on with the one behind me still?
Speaker 1 (08:28):
So the one behind you is the one that took a swing at
you with a shadowy sword.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
Oh, okay, I'm going to take my meat cleaver, okay,
and I'm going to swing directlyat his ribs.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Okay yeah, give me that swing 14.
14.
Okay yeah, give me that swing14.
14.
Okay.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
And give me the damage Give me a 10.
, a 10.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Okay, so 10 damage.
There is no resistance, as thisshadow just kind of evaporates.
Now I need both of you to rollme perception checks as we get
down to the shadow's turn 16.
Okay, that's not good.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
That's 10.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
10.
All right, vance, you noticethat as these shadows are
slaying people, they are risingas shadows.
Oh, oh, hey, I think we got toget the hell out of here, and
the number of shadows is now twoto one per person left.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Yeah, we got to get.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
The hell's going on.
Speaker 3 (09:27):
They just keep multiplying.
Everyone they kill comes backas one of them, and they're not
undead.
They didn't run.
I don't know what the hell'sgoing on.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Where the hell's your lizard friend.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
Didn't he die?
Speaker 1 (09:42):
No, essel's still here, he's fighting.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Somewhere around here .
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Your character's thoughts are so profound.
He's like I say thing.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
Thing in this voice.
Grab Essel and let's get thehell out of here.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
Essel was immediately just swinging.
However, with your 16, when youturn around, essel is in the
same direction as that balconyon the castle.
As you look up, you see theleader.
You're presuming the leader itwas the one that was on the
balcony with the king and ZhangLock eyes with you, tilt her
(10:29):
head to the side and just grin,make a wisdom check as she fades
through the balcony.
15, 15, okay, yeah, girl.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
Yeah, this was just for veins oh, yeah, yeah, just
do that for the next thing.
Yeah, yeah, just leave it there.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
As she sinks through the floor, you feel chills
running down your spine as youresist the urge to run away.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Kind of my plan, so that's a weird feeling.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Well, it's more of like the voluntary you can
choose which way to go ratherthan just panic out.
As she suddenly appears infront of the two of you no thank
you, how does she appear?
Speaker 3 (11:12):
she appears in front of us in front of you yes no,
but I mean like?
Speaker 2 (11:16):
does she materialize?
Does she float?
Speaker 1 (11:18):
she appears through the ground.
She rises up through the groundand she stands easily two to
three feet taller than you andthis very ornate dress that just
has rippling, almost like thelight around it is getting
sucked in.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Oh, a baddie.
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Hey, she grinned at me.
I think she likes me.
Hey, she grinned at me.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
I think she likes me.
She suddenly, in the blink ofan eye, raises both hands as she
goes to reach for your faces.
Make me dexterity saving throws.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Hey, she's probably going to succeed on me, so
you're going to need to.
I don't know, pull her off meor something.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
I got 17.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
17?
.
I did get a very good roll 16.
Speaker 1 (12:10):
Okay, both of you succeed and get out of the way
right, as her hands would havepassed through your faces.
Hmm, you have one turn to reactbefore she strikes again.
What would the two of you liketo do?
Speaker 3 (12:22):
Grab Essel and go.
Do we get?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
Yeah, I'm gonna dash for the door all right uh, oh
you're.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
You're out in an open courtyard oh, we're in an open.
Yeah, you're in a courtyard,looking at the castle like
balcony.
Oh, so you're essentially inthe town square yeah, there's
nothing we can do, no it'shopeless, we're gonna die yeah,
we should get the hell out ofhere.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
I'm just going to the last scene in the movie the
Mist.
I'm just going to kill him andthen myself yeah right.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
And then she's like I was just making cannolis.
I was like what the?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
hell.
Is there a clearing, Is there awall that we can get beyond?
That would get us into the safe.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
Oh yeah, yeah, there's streets you were in a
central courtyard, so you cansplit down any alleyway.
Let's book it.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Essel, let's get out of here.
Turn and run.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Which direction do you go Now?
Just, I guess, as a reminder,to the south was the military
quarters, To the east was thegate that you entered when you
first arrived here, and to thenorth is back to Essel's church.
Let's head back to the church.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
Yeah, we go north.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
Okay, you split and you run forward.
I need both of you to give mejust D20 rolls to see what
happens as you are pursued.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
Yeah, can we cue the Scooby-Doo bongo?
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
Fitting 12.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
All right, both of you are able to make it north
without getting caught.
I need one more roll from youguys.
Okay, Ooh eight, eight, okay,cool, 12.
12.
Vance, you take a couple ofhits as swords appear from the
ground striking at your feet.
Oh, that was almost max damagetwice.
(14:01):
So that was seven psychic andsix psychic damage.
Alright, how you doing bud, bad, bad Okay.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
I'm quick-footing, good to know.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
My plantar fasciitis, oh right in my feet.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
But you're like down here so they're like by your
head.
Oh yeah, you got hit in thechest.
That's why it was so muchdamage.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
The two of you were able to make it back to the
church with Essel and as youclose the door and look out the
windows, you see the shadowyarmy quickly approaching.
Essel looks at the two of youand goes have you, gentlemen,
ever seen anything like thisbefore?
What the hell is going on?
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Man, I ain't never seen no shit like this bro.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
No, no, nothing.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Okay.
Were any of you able to hurtthem?
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Every time you I don't know if they feel pain,
but I know the soldiers die andthen you end up with like two or
three more of them Hang on.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
What do you mean when that you end up with two or
three more of them and I cut oldboy hand off.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
His hand came out of his body.
It was a ghost hand.
And when the ghost hand died,so did two more soldiers.
Hands fell off and then twomore ghosts show up.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Uh, roll me an insight check.
You can as well vance eight,okay 20.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Okay, 20, not nat 20.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Unnat 20.
So you can tell that Esselnever saw the.
He's seeing the soldiers, sowhat you're?
Speaker 3 (15:39):
trying to explain to him is going right over.
He's so lost right now.
All right, look, something ishappening where a lot of the
soldiers, I think, are eitherbeing possessed or having like a
shadow version of themselvescome out.
There was this tall lady kindof into her having like a shadow
version of themselves come out.
There was this tall lady kindof into her.
I think she likes me back butlike she seems bad news, so like
I, it's probably gonna be realfun, but not a healthy
relationship, you know what Imean.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Anyways, I'm sorry, yeah.
Anyways, he's in charge of allthese uh uh, uh uh soldiers.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
That actually are shadow people he, he goes, I, I
hear what you're saying.
And he pulls a little pamphletout of his back pocket and he
says if we make it through this,and it's just for therapy look
man, he got a chick thatapparently ghosted him.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
She came at him with some frigid hands and he's
obsessed.
But that's not the point.
That's not the point, yeah yeahthat's not the point.
The point is he got knifed inthe chest as we ran away.
Did you not see that?
Speaker 1 (16:32):
street swords dude?
No, yeah, I saw that, but Ijust I it just looked like
soldiers coming from thealleyways to me look harder next
time look deeper, okay, okayI'm just gonna fail, really
self-reflect in this moment.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
Yeah, bro, maybe it's your lizard eyes.
I don't know, it's a lizardeyes.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
So in that moment the shadows get closer and Essel
starts boarding up windows andstuff like that.
Do you guys help?
How do you guys want to prepare?
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Do we see soldiers coming?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
The two of you now see shadows.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, yes, and he sees soldiers he is currently
seeing soldiers.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
He did not quite break through and see.
Speaker 3 (17:13):
Do we just get out of the city?
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Question what all's in the church, like, how big is
this monastery area?
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Oh yeah, it's very traditional, when you imagine
walking into a cathedral withlike like a big, open stained
glass, big entryway, just bighall, okay, but there's also
some doors off to the side.
That would be like a diningarea and like the living
quarters for the priest, whichis where you guys found Essel's
stuff, and Essel says that thereis a hidden compartment in his
(17:46):
quarters to get out of here ifyou cannot defend the church.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
All right, well, let's help board up and then, if
we need, we got the skedaddlehole, because there's also a
bunch of people.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
I was about to say how many people are in this
church.
Yeah, because there was peoplehere when we left.
Yeah, yeah, there's roughly 10.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
10 people that work at the church?
None, not nuns, but theequivalent in dnd world.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
we can't let these people die man they took care of
us, so that's what took care ofus.
We gotta board up and hold themoff.
How many soldiers or spirits doyou say coming?
Speaker 1 (18:19):
at the moment you see about 30 all right, we got this
man we're good.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
You are dying.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
You got nothing.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Tell you what.
Organize these people and let'sget this place as boarded up as
we can.
Let's see if we can't find someholding places.
He says he's got a crawl space.
Let's prep all the people to gointo the crawl space and get
them out of the city if shitgets too weird.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
Okay, so you start to prep for like an evacuation.
Speaker 3 (18:46):
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Who is doing the evacuation?
Who is boarding up windows?
Speaker 2 (18:51):
He's dying, I want him getting the people to the.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
I'm going to help them out, but before I do that,
I'm going to go ahead and castCure Wounds on myself.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Okay, cool, so you get some healing and then you
start filtering people out andyou stay back with Essel to
start boarding up.
Is there anything else that youwould like to do?
You're more than welcome toroll me an insight check.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Oh, what is that?
That's horrible, it's bad, it'sreal bad, isn't it?
That is a unnatural four.
An unnatural four.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
An unnatural four.
So was it a nat one.
Yeah, oh, okay, yeah, you 100%believe that boarding up these
windows is going to stop theshadow people.
Tight Hell yeah, dude, TightEssel's doing it because he
genuinely is like oh no boards,stop people.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Vance, vance with an.
A.
Yeah, do me a favor, lookaround and see if you can find
anything flammable.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
All right, burn in the church to the ground.
No, we got an idea though.
Okay, we do anything flammable.
All right, burn in the churchdegree.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
We do, I also have this idea and know what it is
and agree there's tons offlammable stuff.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
I mean it's a church, so most of the chairs seats
pews, yeah like pamphlets fortherapy.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Pamphlets for therapy yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
Pamphlets for therapy .
Yeah, essel just gets like somany yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
I'm going to let Essel keep boarding windows,
okay, and I'm just going tostart throwing anything I see
that's flammable outside thefront door, like towards the
patio.
Okay, cool or wherever theporch area is the entrance to
the church.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
They get closer.
Are you just getting people tothe exit?
Or are you actually starting tofilter people out?
I, I think if it's does itappear to be safe outside so you
don't know, because it goesunderground and north, so you
believe it's going to break thenorth wall of the city all right
.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Um, yeah, I think it's.
I mean 30 of them versus thethree of us and uh, it's not a
good sign.
So I think I'm actually I goingto shuffle them out.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
Okay, At about this time the first shadows start to
appear at the door.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
Nice.
Does this church make wine orwhiskey or anything like that?
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Kerosene yeah, they would probably have some wine,
wine, yeah.
Speaker 3 (21:04):
This is the Church of Our Lady Fireball.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Yeah that's what I was going to go for the whiskey
but wine is not flammable enough, so we're going to start off
with me and Essel are just goingto, because you can't, oh idea,
all right, I found a chair thatI was throwing outside.
I'm going to break said chair.
Okay, take a leg off of it.
(21:28):
I'm going to spark it and lightit on fire.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
Yep, I'm going to throw it like a javelin while it
is on fire.
At the first one, I see, at thefirst one, you see At the first
shadow.
You said there was a startingapproach, first one.
I see I'm throwing this at him,give me your two hit.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
It is an improvised weapon, so it will use your
strength stat.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Jesus Christ.
A three does not hit.
Does it no, it does not itsoars right by the first one.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
Yes, it does.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Well, that's always a good noise, yeah well.
Best thing I can do at thispoint is I'm going to dash
towards etzel okay yeah and uh,I'm gonna basically grab him and
be like I missed.
They're coming fast and I'mgonna take his spot of hammering
(22:21):
things up okay, yeah, and thenwhat?
Speaker 1 (22:24):
what did you want him to do?
Speaker 2 (22:26):
uh, I'm asking him basically to go try to like, uh,
hold them off at the door andsee if he can hit one of them,
while I finish boarding the lastwindow.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Okay, cool, you start to filter people out.
Are you just pushing themthrough the tunnel or are you
going with them?
Speaker 3 (22:42):
No, I'm just kind of I'll be in after.
I'll be in after I got to makesure everyone gets out.
So I'm just shuffling themthrough and then I'll be in
after I'll be in after I got tomake sure everyone gets out, so
I'm just shuffling them throughand then I'll be coming back
into the church.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Yeah, what would you like to do before the first ones
begin to try and breach?
I thought you said one alreadymade it in, One was like at the
door which is now Essel isengaged with.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
Cool.
Can I hit him with?
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Sacred Flames.
Yeah, yeah, give me a.
It's a dexterity saving, throwon mine.
Speaker 3 (23:07):
Yep 12 or more 14 on the die.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Yeah, that's how it works.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
Don't have to like pause dramatically, oh baby.
Speaker 1 (23:15):
I dodged it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I didn't.
The Shadow did.
I have no beef personally withyou.
I didn't write this to TPK.
(23:35):
start over yeah right, just apersonal vendetta, we've all but
like I don't know if you'veplayed long enough, you've had
that guy.
That's like, oh and uh, ameteor hits you, yep, but okay,
that was thrilling.
Yeah, what a good time we alljust had.
Yep.
As essel engages with the firstone, he uses his sword and
cleaves a couple in half, butyou notice that as they approach
the door they aren't violentlycoming in, but they are
surrounding and as they surround, you see the tall, shadowy
(23:57):
woman up here in the front andshe goes.
Gentlemen, there's quite asimple option here.
The two of you and she pointsto you two seem to be a bit more
attuned to this world.
You have a simple choice youcan either die here or you can
(24:21):
come with me.
And if you come with me, all ofthese peasants or whatever
people, whatever you want tocall them, will be fine.
I just want you two.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
I told you she liked me.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
Stop looking at her like that, she goes.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
I am uncomfortable.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Are the people in the tunnel already?
Yes, everybody in the tunnel,except for Essel.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
It is the three of you.
Essel in the middle because heengaged the first couple.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
What kind of dragonborn is Essel Red?
So he's got some fire breath,he does.
He does Vince with an A.
I know you want to go with her.
It doesn't sound like a goodidea.
It sounds like she wantssomething inside of us.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
Yeah, yeah, and not in a good way.
No, no, no, no.
My college years are behind me.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
I thought you were going to be like well, I wanted
something inside her.
I left that on the table.
I didn't want to.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
But I mean, I think we got everyone out.
We could probably slip out theback because we got everyone to
accept.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
She goes.
This is interesting that you'retalking about this out loud.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
I mean, it's quietly Shut up.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
No, if she's got the building surrounded, she's
definitely going to be able toget to us in the tunnel.
I'm sure let's say we go withher and then maybe not.
I think that's a good idea.
Speaker 3 (25:52):
I don't think lies are a good thing to build a
relationship on.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
I think she's standing right fucking there
this is like I thought.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Maybe you guys, I can hear you.
Sorry, you didn't even say youlike whispered or nothing.
You just started talking toeach other like I just don't
exist.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Yeah, I have object permanence issues.
Oh yeah, I have CTE, pretty badCheck this out.
Whoa.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
And then she pops back up.
Boo, I thought.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
I defeated her for a second because she was gone.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
She clearly has some sort of high-level magic.
Can I roll Arcana to see if Ican figure out what it is?
Yeah, of course.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
As you guys kind of talk amongst yourselves, she
goes Gentlemen, I'm losing mypatience, I got a 17.
Okay, you can tell that thetype of magic that she is using
is illusion magic and it is offthe charts.
It's literally warping lightaround her dude.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
Look, I didn't trick some people in my past but you,
man, you are catfishing the hellout of everybody in this room
right now who are you really?
Because I'll go with you but Ifeel like you lying to me she
goes oh, who am I?
Speaker 1 (27:11):
I would I would say that entirely depends on the
situation.
I can be whoever I want to be.
And she snaps her fingers andshe becomes asshole.
And then she snaps her fingersagain and she becomes the king.
And she snaps her fingers again.
Kat Dennings, kat Dennings, katDennings.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Kat.
Dennings Kat Dennings KatDennings as she snaps her
fingers and becomes Z KatDennings.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
Kat Dennings, kat Dennings, kat Dennings, kat
Dennings, kat Dennings, as shesnaps her fingers and becomes
Zang and she goes.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
I can be anybody.
I think the question right nowis who did the two of you want
to be?
Do you want to be an obstacleor do you want to be a part of
something greater?
As?
Speaker 2 (27:46):
she grins there is no defeatingins.
Ah, there is no defeating her.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
No.
And there is no walking away,hang on.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Earmuffs.
Speaker 3 (27:56):
Earmuffs.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Oh, okay, yeah, of course.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
This is definitely not irritating the shit out of
me.
Speaker 3 (28:02):
I think we gotta go with her.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
We don't have a choice.
Yeah, it's not really much of achoice, unless you want another
one of those cold hands orthose things.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
How does Essel.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
Feel about this.
Essel is essentially slowly,like in the meantime, because
she's talking to you.
He has been falling back slowlyinto the church.
Speaker 3 (28:21):
Just Homer Simpson into the bush.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
Not abandoning you guys, but he can clearly suss
out that she wants you to.
She doesn't give a shit abouthim, which could be bad for
everybody, so he's safeguardinghimself to be able to run to
protect his people.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
In case, because she could be lying.
She could be lying about.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Oh, she's 100% lying.
She's lying about everything.
I know your type, ma'am, Ibelieved her.
I know you type, ma'am, Ibelieved her, I know you did.
Speaker 1 (28:52):
I don't trust you, so you don't believe that I will
keep all those people alive.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
No, I believe that you could be anyone and everyone
, but I don't believe you likebeing who you really are.
Speaker 3 (29:02):
I'd hand her one of those pamphlets.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Yeah, you solved my deep trauma riddle.
No, I don't think it's a deepriddle.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
I think it's very surface level, as you shapeshift
to anyone who you want, so youcan show off your power.
But what is this whole part ofsomething greater?
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Oh, she turns back into her original form and she
goes I don't change into who Iwant, I change into who I need
to be.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
I dated someone like that.
It's exhausting.
You keep talking likesomething's going to be.
I dated someone like that.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
It's exhausting.
You keep talking likesomething's going to happen.
It's called the secret.
I'm manifesting it.
Roll me for Riz, when a jokeroll hits reality too hard.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
That's a lot of matter.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
That's a lot of matter.
I got a real life version ofwhat would happen.
You go to say I won't punishreality too hard.
Oh, that's a lot of meta.
That one yeah, that's a lot ofmeta.
I got a real life version ofwhat would happen.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
You go to say I won't punish you too hard, you just
like fart loud.
It's just like it's like listenSwoop.
Speaker 3 (29:57):
It's like I think we're going to go with her.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Where are we going?
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Okay, so you guys are deciding to go with her.
We have no choice.
Speaker 3 (30:06):
Yeah, it doesn't really feel like we have an
option.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
There's always an option.
There's always an option, but Idon't want to die today.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Okay, not today, not today so she goes oh, so you'll
be joining me, then when are wegoing?
Oh well, that doesn't reallymatter.
Speaker 2 (30:22):
You said we could go with you, correct?
Speaker 1 (30:31):
And you have no idea where we're going.
No, I know where we're going,but why doesn't it matter to us?
Speaker 2 (30:33):
what we want to know, where we're going.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Let's just say the place that we're going is not
possible for you to know, it'snot possible for me, it's not
possible for me to understandwhat is or it's not on a map and
, as soon as you agree, sheapproaches and she does what she
originally tried to doforcefully, where she puts her
hands on your face as all threeof you sink into the ground.
Speaker 3 (30:53):
I don't like this.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Both of you make wisdom saving throws, as the
coldest you've ever felt goesacross your entire body 18.
16.
Speaker 2 (31:05):
Okay, so both of you succeed and will only take half
damage, this 16.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
Okay, so both of you succeed and will only take half
damage.
This cab sucks.
It does, so you'll take twomore necrotic damage.
So as you sink into the ground,neither one of you can see
anything.
It's not like you're seeingdark, but you literally see
nothing around you.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
See, this is what happens when you trust them.
Speaker 1 (31:33):
You guys can't hear each other.
You guys try and talk and itgoes into a void.
Speaker 3 (31:41):
That's good for the audio podcast yeah, Hang on.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Just let me fucking narrate.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
How about?
Okay, you want a differentnarration.
You write a ding, dang show,just get real hostile you know
what?
I think this is the last episode, as the darkness and the void
take over your bodies.
The two of you can't tellwhether it's been a minute, an
hour, whether it's been days orweeks, but after an undetermined
(32:09):
amount of time you start to seelittle specks of light appear
around you.
As suddenly, these specks oflight collapse in on you and you
appear in what looks like ajail cell.
The two of you are not together, but you could hear many people
(32:29):
around you.
Roll me insight checks.
Speaker 3 (32:32):
I'm like, oh no, I got in on my mushrooms again,
didn't I?
Speaker 1 (32:36):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Just in the void, you're just
like.
I'm sure this won't give mehorrendous hallucinations.
Speaker 3 (32:44):
You'll be able to find me because my terrible
bubble guts.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
No, you can't torture that information.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
Bad to me I oh my god , I would love to see that in
like a comedy sketch where theguy's like trying to torture
somebody, but the other dude'sjust ripping farting rancid.
So the guy's like he's like Iwill get you oh my god oh my God
, you're nasty dude 15.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
14.
15 and 14.
Both of you succeed.
And you hear the cries oftormented people all throughout
this hallway, just people cryingout for help as they seem to be
enduring a ton of pain.
And at that time you just hearmetal clanging, just one at a
(33:32):
time, just ting, ting, and it'sgetting closer and closer and
what turns the corner is whatcan only be described as a
horrendous chimera beast Rightdo I have all my equipment on
still?
Speaker 2 (33:50):
no ah beans?
Speaker 1 (33:52):
have we been wiped of all our equipment?
Speaker 3 (33:54):
yes, you are essentially just in commoner
clothes at the moment I lookaround to see if let me solo her
is around just a guy with a potstanding in the corner, just
like you.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Just gotta say something I'll be here and we're
all in individual cells.
Yes, I'm going to just straightBruce Lee it.
I'm going to sit downcross-legged and meditate.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
Oh, I'm sorry, I should have been a bit more
specific.
You guys are literally likestrapped down arms out.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
Oh yeah, that makes a difference.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we're chained to a wall.
Speaker 3 (34:25):
No, like a table.
Speaker 1 (34:26):
A table A table that's leaned back, almost like
you're at the doctor's office inone of those leaning chairs
except you're just arms outstrapped like 45 degree angle.
Speaker 3 (34:35):
Well, I'd like to try to rip the straps off, okay.
Speaker 1 (34:40):
Give me an intelligence.
Oh, what Check.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Can I do strength?
Speaker 1 (34:47):
No, it's almost like the lady that has completely
enveloped her world in illusions.
It's a mind game.
Eleven, okay, you do feel somegive in it as the creature
approaches.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
Huh.
Speaker 1 (35:04):
Dolomir, do you have any initial reactions?
Speaker 2 (35:07):
Yeah, I realize I'm chained, I realize what happened
and I realize I lost track oftime and I've done these drugs
before.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
Okay, all right so.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
I close my eyes and I decide to meditate and focus on
my Feywild ancestry and see ifI can see my way out.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Oh, okay, cool, Is that a class ability?
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Yes, well, it's a race ability, a race ability,
yeah, I can just meditate and.
Speaker 1 (35:36):
I can try to prevent being charmed Gotcha.
How long does that take?
Speaker 2 (35:41):
That is, I can do it once per long rest.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
Gotcha.
But there's no time associated.
It doesn't say 30 minutes, no,it's just wisdom saving Gotcha,
like time associated.
It doesn't say 30 minutes, itdoesn't say wisdom saving gotcha
.
As you try to break free and asyou begin to meditate, the
creature gets closer, as younotice that out of the palm of
its hands, blades are stickingout as it sharpens them and
clings them together, and as youmeditate and as you desperately
(36:11):
try and get free, it juststarts dragging it up and down
and across your chest, leavinglittle bitty cuts as she Is he
dual wielding.
Speaker 3 (36:20):
He's getting us both, or just me?
Speaker 1 (36:21):
No, no, no.
This is both happening to youguys, so you're both seeing and
experiencing the same thingthough you're not together, as
she appears in front of both ofyou now from your guys'
perspective.
You don't know that this ishappening to each other, right?
But clearly, from a narrativeperspective, you are both
(36:42):
experiencing this at the sametime.
As she goes.
I just have one simple question.
How is it that you saw me?
And that is to both of you.
We do vance first and thenwe'll go to dolomir I, I don't
know, I don't even know what youare.
(37:05):
The uh, chimera creature slowlypushes the blade a little bit
more onto your shoulder and shegoes.
I feel like you are telling methe truth, or.
And then she kind of pauses fora second, she goes.
It is very possible, and she'sjust kind of mumbling to herself
(37:25):
that he?
All right, I believe you.
And she begins to leave.
All right, I believe you.
And she begins to leave.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
Dolomir, how do you respond?
I didn't see you.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
I felt you, is this an ability that you were born
with?
Is this something that youfound?
No, you just feel creepy.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
You come around with that attitude and I just pick up
on it.
You got a vibe.
Speaker 1 (37:54):
She's like oh, thanks .
Speaker 2 (37:56):
It's definitely not what I was going for.
No, I'd have popped my balloon.
Speaker 1 (38:05):
And she goes.
The many years that I have beendoing things like this, there's
only been a handful of peoplethat have been able to detect my
presence or see through theillusions that I create amongst
this world.
And it's fascinating that tworandom individuals in the middle
of this little town justoutside of Sol Deus, a place
(38:29):
that I desperately needed andyou two arrive I'm not one to
really believe in coincidence,as the chimera pushes his blade
into your side and you take fourpsychic damage.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Well, why are you tricking people?
What's the point?
What do you gain out ofeverything you're doing?
Speaker 1 (38:52):
Well, what I gain is a strategic foothold for, let's
just say, my people.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
Who are your people?
What do you mean by your people?
Speaker 1 (39:04):
That is none of your concern.
I'm just simply here to findout how two what seemingly seems
as mundane individuals are ableto witness magic on this scale.
Speaker 2 (39:16):
Well, I mean, you're showing it off.
Y'all want nobody to look at it.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Yeah, we cut back to Vance and you have just been
through what seems like aneternity of pain, as this
chimera just toys with you overtime.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Yeah, I guess we cut back, like Vance is just talking
, he's like I know you'reprobably not listening.
You're real busy up there but,anything would help would be
great, just like a prayer, notprayer.
And you're reaching out to,just reaching out to.
Speaker 1 (39:50):
Just reaching out.
Okay, give me a.
Hmm, this is an interesting one, because you, as a cleric, do
have an ability.
Are you using your specificcleric ability, or is this more
of just dialogue?
Speaker 3 (40:09):
I don't think I have that, the channel divinity, yet
I have divine spark and turnundead.
Speaker 1 (40:16):
Oh, okay, so you don't have the ability yet.
Correct.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
So I'm just like reaching out, okay.
Speaker 1 (40:23):
As you reach out, it seems like a swelling begins in
your chest, where you start tofeel very empowered.
Give me a wisdom check withadvantage right now 18, 18.
Speaker 3 (40:40):
Okay, two on the first one, so thank god yeah
yeah, we'll get back to you injust a second.
Speaker 1 (40:46):
Remember that 18.
Okay, dolamir, she questionsyou for a little bit longer, as
you have also been getting justtoyed with by this horrendous
creature and I'm assuming you'retrying to keep your meditative
state as these questions andstuff are going on, to kind of
build up on on that fey abilityI want an advantage.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
roll, yeah, not to get meta.
Speaker 1 (41:14):
And I need you to also give me a wisdom saving,
well, a wisdom check, withadvantage right now Unnatural 21
.
It would have been wild if itwas a natural 21.
Right.
Speaker 2 (41:25):
And I got a D20.
I'd have been boy talk aboutillusions.
Just a Sharpie.
Speaker 3 (41:34):
Oh man, this dice doesn't have a 2, but it does
have a 21.
Yeah right, have you guys seenthe gambler's dice?
Speaker 1 (41:39):
It's got 3 1's and 3 20's On it so the 1, 2 and 3 are
all 1's and the 20, 19 and 18are 20's.
I like it.
I've thought about getting onefor like certain scenarios, but
I just found out about thatyesterday.
Anyway, back at it.
You see the way out.
And the way out isn'tphysically walking out that door
(42:01):
, but it is completely shuttingout what you believe these
illusions are.
And that is the wisdom that you, vance, have been granted by
this being that speaks to you ina deep tone and says well, you
can just get out whenever youwant.
You just have to believe thatyou are more powerful than these
(42:22):
illusions.
Oh cool, I just get up, youjust get up.
Speaker 3 (42:26):
Okay, it's easy, all right, all right.
Speaker 1 (42:31):
As soon as you feel that divine power swelling
through you, your handscompletely pass through the
shackles and Dolomir.
The moment that your fateancestry kicks in and that pulse
of just sheer energy surgesthrough you, your hands pass
through as well.
And the moment that they passthrough those shackles, all that
light that imploded on you tobegin with to create disillusion
(42:54):
explodes out.
Your body as the chimera isdestroyed and this we don't know
her name yet, but thisspiritual entity that has been
questioning you screams in painand disappears.
And both of you wake up inEssel's church with glowing,
(43:15):
bright red eyes and, in a momentof clarity where you realize
you're back, you pass out, andthat is where we're ending this
session you're starting to getgood at this.
Speaker 3 (43:28):
I'm trying.
Who's my dog?
Well, that has been episode 6of the monster monster podcast.
You're starting to get good atthis.
I'm trying.
What about dog?
Speaker 1 (43:33):
Well, that has been episode six of the Monster
Monster podcast.
My name is Tyler.
I've been your DM.
Thank you all for listening andI'm just going to pass it on to
Tyson.
Speaker 3 (43:41):
Hey, I'm Tyson Cox.
Thanks for listening.
You can find me everywhere atTyson Cox Comedy.
If you enjoyed this podcast,tell a friend, leave a review,
all those little things.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
They help more than you are aware of.
Oh yeah, and I'm Dolomir Sedrin, aka Brian Petrie.
You can find me at all things,at Brian Petrie Comedy, on all
the stuff.
I'm always somewhere near you.
Just holler at me if you wantme closer.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
All right, no-transcript.
Propaganda does not deceive people.
It merely helps them to deceivethemselves.
Eric Hoffer, Previously onMonster Monster.
Our heroes found themselves atthe doorsteps of chaos as the
vote to join Sol Deus was haltedby the king and a mysterious
figure.
Moments later, Zhang was slainas the crowd grows panicked and
heads begin to fall.
(00:20):
Welcome to Monster Monster.
Hello everybody, my name isTyler Waltzz and I'll be your dm
and to my left hey everybody,I'm tyson cox.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
I'll be playing vance .
He's a a cleric.
He uh, you know, just wants towalk around and help.
But you know, sometimes yougotta hurt a little to help a
little yeah, a harm assist typea harm assist and to my right
yeah, yeah, I'm Brian Petrie.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Everybody what's happening?
I'm playing Dolan Mir Sedrin.
Everybody call me Dolo.
I don't do a lot.
I grew up in kind of like theslums of Sector 3, or whatever
they want to call that place,and I just kind of I got to get
by as I get by.
You know, get it how you live,figure it out All right, and
(01:07):
with that we're going to getstarted.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
As in the recap, it is now chaos, as shadowy figures
begin to appear all over thecrowd as Zhang falls to the
ground.
If I remember correctly, brian,you passed the perception check
to actually be able to seethese shadows.
However, vance, you did not.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Mm-mm.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
So I need Vance to start this session with a wisdom
saving throw.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
Oh, ha, ha, ha, ha A hot four on the die.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Okay, this is very interesting.
I'm very curious how this isgoing to go out.
I need you to take fivenecrotic damage.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Am I just getting like poked by stuff?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
I can't see as an icy hand is placed on your back.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Oh, it's like, it's like your girlfriend when she
puts like she's like my feet arecold and then puts your feet on
your back, yeah yeah, Exceptyou're dying.
Oh, this isn't like a fun goof.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
It's the same date a lady with low iron and poor
circulation so, as the handpushes against your back, it
feels very forceful, and then italmost just appears to go
inside your back as you feel,the cold now seem to push on the
front of your chest.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
I think I'm having a heart attack.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Now's the time.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
I'm coming.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Dolomir, I need you to roll the same, but with
advantage.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Hey All right.
Roll 15.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
Okay, I was about to say we're celebrating, but we
still don't know if you passed.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
No, no, no, just guess, Tyler.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
Yeah.
Okay, I was about to say we'recelebrating but we still don't
know if you passed.
No, no, no, just guess Tyler,yeah, okay so you take nine
halved.
Round it down, because I'mgentle.
Because, he likes you.
As you start to feel the handpress against your back, you
notice in time and turn aroundto see what looks like a knight
completely engulfed in shadowsaround you.
Can I get you guys to rollinitiative to see how this plays
(03:06):
out?
Speaker 3 (03:07):
Yeah, 11 on the die, so 10.
Seven.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Seven and 10.
All righty, so we will actuallystart with the 10.
Wow, you just had some necroticdamage hit you.
How do you want to respond?
You still don't see anythinggoing on in the crowd Right now.
As far as you can tell, sold a,and soldiers are the ones that
are slaying people in the crowd.
Speaker 3 (03:29):
So you said I felt necrotic damage, but I can't see
anything Correct.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
And there is a pressure now building on your
chest, as it feels likesomething's pushing out.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to like, turn
like Constantine, where, uh, I'mjust going to hold up my hammer
and channel divinity and turnundead.
Okay, cool, get off me you damnastards, you damn astards.
Bastards, you almost got it out.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
He's cold.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
Bastards.
Okay, so when you channeldivinity, what exactly does it
do?
Speaker 3 (04:02):
DC 12 saving throw DC 12 saving throw.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
What if they're not undead?
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Then nothing oh.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Nothing noticeable happens, as you still feel the
pressure On your chest.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
God damn it.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
Does that take up your whole turn?
Shove, roll me a perception.
Or arcana, check eight, eight.
Okay, you still cannot seethese beings, but you see more
soldans flood into the crowdthese soldans got real cold
hands or something dude yeah,dolemir.
You see that now the shadowsmatch one for one for each
(04:41):
person in the crowd, as more arearound the castle.
It is now your turn.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Everybody's cursed.
They all curse, like in general.
No, everybody's ghosts, I cansee them.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
There's also one right behind you.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
There's one behind me .
Speaker 1 (05:04):
You know that one that touched your back thought
it was my ex.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
But you know what we're gonna go with.
It's a ghost, because I seenothing but ghost.
Uh, you know what I'm gonna do?
I'm going to, um, how far isaway.
How far away is the one wherehe is from me?
Speaker 1 (05:21):
oh, you guys were standing right next.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
Oh, we're right next to each other so the one that
touched him is like right thereyou can literally see its arm.
I'm gonna take my meat cleaverand see if I can cut its hand oh
, okay, cool, give me a arcanacheck.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
Hopefully somebody can learn something about these
things I.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
yeah, you think I know I am good, I relent.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Yeah, can you just throw the rocks better on the
table that have numbers on them,please?
That's a 12.
Trying to progress a story here.
12 succeeds, then don't make meroll.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
That's the rule, yeah .
Speaker 1 (06:04):
So the meat cleaver passes completely through the
shadow, and though it doesn'tlook like it did damage, it did
sever the connection with Vance.
So the cold has now left yourchest and the pressure is now
gone.
What you saw was a Saldayansoldier behind you get his hand
cut off.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Oh, I'm going to just start rocking soldiers.
Next turn, just going ham onthese bitches.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
It is now the shadow's turn, as the first one
gets a 16 on you, vance.
Yeah, that'll do it, that'll doit.
You're going to take threepsychic damage as one takes a
swing at Dolomir for a 15.
Yeah, he hits and you take fivepsychic damage.
Shit Now, vance.
(06:51):
When you get hit, you get tomake another perception check.
Okay, 17.
17, okay, so you actually startto see behind the illusion.
You haven't completely clearedout and seen all of them in the
crowd, but in your directvicinity you can now see that
(07:13):
some of these soldiers areactually shadows.
Well, this is bad.
Good input yeah, people aredying and you're like I don't
think this is on the up and upsomething fishy's going on start
.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
start cutting at their feet.
You're closer.
All right, look out ankles, I'mgoing to get you.
No, seriously, swing at theirfucking feet, I will.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Is it my turn.
Yeah we're back up at the top Iwill I start swinging.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
Yeah, I'm screaming for my health over here.
Speaker 3 (07:43):
I just do that thing from the Kingsman where it's
just chaos is all around, andI'm just gonna start going ham
and crushing toes Like thechurch one.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Yeah, all right, yeah , make me a couple of attacks.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I only have one at my level.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Oh yeah, you do 18.
Cool, all righty, thatdefinitely hits.
Roll me your damage.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
That is gonna be, ooh seven.
Speaker 1 (08:03):
Okay, yeah, you completely take out the knees on
this shadow.
Speaker 3 (08:08):
Yeah gross.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Yeah, it's just a shadow, so it just kind of poofs
away and they fall.
Speaker 3 (08:13):
Unsatisfying.
Yeah well, Now he's my height.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I poke him in the eyes Like Cotton from King of
the Hill.
Yeah, took his shins out, butwith that we are now back to you
, Dolomir.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yeah, what's going on with the one behind me still?
Speaker 1 (08:28):
So the one behind you is the one that took a swing at
you with a shadowy sword.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
Oh, okay, I'm going to take my meat cleaver, okay,
and I'm going to swing directlyat his ribs.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Okay yeah, give me that swing 14.
14.
Okay yeah, give me that swing14.
14.
Okay.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
And give me the damage Give me a 10.
, a 10.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Okay, so 10 damage.
There is no resistance, as thisshadow just kind of evaporates.
Now I need both of you to rollme perception checks as we get
down to the shadow's turn 16.
Okay, that's not good.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
That's 10.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
10.
All right, vance, you noticethat as these shadows are
slaying people, they are risingas shadows.
Oh, oh, hey, I think we got toget the hell out of here, and
the number of shadows is now twoto one per person left.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Yeah, we got to get.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
The hell's going on.
Speaker 3 (09:27):
They just keep multiplying.
Everyone they kill comes backas one of them, and they're not
undead.
They didn't run.
I don't know what the hell'sgoing on.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Where the hell's your lizard friend.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
Didn't he die?
Speaker 1 (09:42):
No, essel's still here, he's fighting.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Somewhere around here .
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Your character's thoughts are so profound.
He's like I say thing.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
Thing in this voice.
Grab Essel and let's get thehell out of here.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
Essel was immediately just swinging.
However, with your 16, when youturn around, essel is in the
same direction as that balconyon the castle.
As you look up, you see theleader.
You're presuming the leader itwas the one that was on the
balcony with the king and ZhangLock eyes with you, tilt her
(10:29):
head to the side and just grin,make a wisdom check as she fades
through the balcony.
15, 15, okay, yeah, girl.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
Yeah, this was just for veins oh, yeah, yeah, just
do that for the next thing.
Yeah, yeah, just leave it there.
Speaker 1 (10:45):
As she sinks through the floor, you feel chills
running down your spine as youresist the urge to run away.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Kind of my plan, so that's a weird feeling.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Well, it's more of like the voluntary you can
choose which way to go ratherthan just panic out.
As she suddenly appears infront of the two of you no thank
you, how does she appear?
Speaker 3 (11:12):
she appears in front of us in front of you yes no,
but I mean like?
Speaker 2 (11:16):
does she materialize?
Does she float?
Speaker 1 (11:18):
she appears through the ground.
She rises up through the groundand she stands easily two to
three feet taller than you andthis very ornate dress that just
has rippling, almost like thelight around it is getting
sucked in.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Oh, a baddie.
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Hey, she grinned at me.
I think she likes me.
Hey, she grinned at me.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
I think she likes me.
She suddenly, in the blink ofan eye, raises both hands as she
goes to reach for your faces.
Make me dexterity saving throws.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Hey, she's probably going to succeed on me, so
you're going to need to.
I don't know, pull her off meor something.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
I got 17.
Speaker 3 (12:03):
17?
.
I did get a very good roll 16.
Speaker 1 (12:10):
Okay, both of you succeed and get out of the way
right, as her hands would havepassed through your faces.
Hmm, you have one turn to reactbefore she strikes again.
What would the two of you liketo do?
Speaker 3 (12:22):
Grab Essel and go.
Do we get?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
Yeah, I'm gonna dash for the door all right uh, oh
you're.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
You're out in an open courtyard oh, we're in an open.
Yeah, you're in a courtyard,looking at the castle like
balcony.
Oh, so you're essentially inthe town square yeah, there's
nothing we can do, no it'shopeless, we're gonna die yeah,
we should get the hell out ofhere.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
I'm just going to the last scene in the movie the
Mist.
I'm just going to kill him andthen myself yeah right.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
And then she's like I was just making cannolis.
I was like what the?
Speaker 2 (12:54):
hell.
Is there a clearing, Is there awall that we can get beyond?
That would get us into the safe.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
Oh yeah, yeah, there's streets you were in a
central courtyard, so you cansplit down any alleyway.
Let's book it.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Essel, let's get out of here.
Turn and run.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Which direction do you go Now?
Just, I guess, as a reminder,to the south was the military
quarters, To the east was thegate that you entered when you
first arrived here, and to thenorth is back to Essel's church.
Let's head back to the church.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
Yeah, we go north.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
Okay, you split and you run forward.
I need both of you to give mejust D20 rolls to see what
happens as you are pursued.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
Yeah, can we cue the Scooby-Doo bongo?
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
Fitting 12.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
All right, both of you are able to make it north
without getting caught.
I need one more roll from youguys.
Okay, Ooh eight, eight, okay,cool, 12.
12.
Vance, you take a couple ofhits as swords appear from the
ground striking at your feet.
Oh, that was almost max damagetwice.
(14:01):
So that was seven psychic andsix psychic damage.
Alright, how you doing bud, bad, bad Okay.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
I'm quick-footing, good to know.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
My plantar fasciitis, oh right in my feet.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
But you're like down here so they're like by your
head.
Oh yeah, you got hit in thechest.
That's why it was so muchdamage.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
The two of you were able to make it back to the
church with Essel and as youclose the door and look out the
windows, you see the shadowyarmy quickly approaching.
Essel looks at the two of youand goes have you, gentlemen,
ever seen anything like thisbefore?
What the hell is going on?
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Man, I ain't never seen no shit like this bro.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
No, no, nothing.
Speaker 1 (14:51):
Okay.
Were any of you able to hurtthem?
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Every time you I don't know if they feel pain,
but I know the soldiers die andthen you end up with like two or
three more of them Hang on.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
What do you mean when that you end up with two or
three more of them and I cut oldboy hand off.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
His hand came out of his body.
It was a ghost hand.
And when the ghost hand died,so did two more soldiers.
Hands fell off and then twomore ghosts show up.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Uh, roll me an insight check.
You can as well vance eight,okay 20.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Okay, 20, not nat 20.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Unnat 20.
So you can tell that Esselnever saw the.
He's seeing the soldiers, sowhat you're?
Speaker 3 (15:39):
trying to explain to him is going right over.
He's so lost right now.
All right, look, something ishappening where a lot of the
soldiers, I think, are eitherbeing possessed or having like a
shadow version of themselvescome out.
There was this tall lady kindof into her having like a shadow
version of themselves come out.
There was this tall lady kindof into her.
I think she likes me back butlike she seems bad news, so like
I, it's probably gonna be realfun, but not a healthy
relationship, you know what Imean.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Anyways, I'm sorry, yeah.
Anyways, he's in charge of allthese uh uh, uh uh soldiers.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
That actually are shadow people he, he goes, I, I
hear what you're saying.
And he pulls a little pamphletout of his back pocket and he
says if we make it through this,and it's just for therapy look
man, he got a chick thatapparently ghosted him.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
She came at him with some frigid hands and he's
obsessed.
But that's not the point.
That's not the point, yeah yeahthat's not the point.
The point is he got knifed inthe chest as we ran away.
Did you not see that?
Speaker 1 (16:32):
street swords dude?
No, yeah, I saw that, but Ijust I it just looked like
soldiers coming from thealleyways to me look harder next
time look deeper, okay, okayI'm just gonna fail, really
self-reflect in this moment.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
Yeah, bro, maybe it's your lizard eyes.
I don't know, it's a lizardeyes.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
So in that moment the shadows get closer and Essel
starts boarding up windows andstuff like that.
Do you guys help?
How do you guys want to prepare?
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Do we see soldiers coming?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
The two of you now see shadows.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, yes, and he sees soldiers he is currently
seeing soldiers.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
He did not quite break through and see.
Speaker 3 (17:13):
Do we just get out of the city?
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Question what all's in the church, like, how big is
this monastery area?
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Oh yeah, it's very traditional, when you imagine
walking into a cathedral withlike like a big, open stained
glass, big entryway, just bighall, okay, but there's also
some doors off to the side.
That would be like a diningarea and like the living
quarters for the priest, whichis where you guys found Essel's
stuff, and Essel says that thereis a hidden compartment in his
(17:46):
quarters to get out of here ifyou cannot defend the church.
Speaker 3 (17:51):
All right, well, let's help board up and then, if
we need, we got the skedaddlehole, because there's also a
bunch of people.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
I was about to say how many people are in this
church.
Yeah, because there was peoplehere when we left.
Yeah, yeah, there's roughly 10.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
10 people that work at the church?
None, not nuns, but theequivalent in dnd world.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
we can't let these people die man they took care of
us, so that's what took care ofus.
We gotta board up and hold themoff.
How many soldiers or spirits doyou say coming?
Speaker 1 (18:19):
at the moment you see about 30 all right, we got this
man we're good.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
You are dying.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
You got nothing.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Tell you what.
Organize these people and let'sget this place as boarded up as
we can.
Let's see if we can't find someholding places.
He says he's got a crawl space.
Let's prep all the people to gointo the crawl space and get
them out of the city if shitgets too weird.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
Okay, so you start to prep for like an evacuation.
Speaker 3 (18:46):
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Who is doing the evacuation?
Who is boarding up windows?
Speaker 2 (18:51):
He's dying, I want him getting the people to the.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
I'm going to help them out, but before I do that,
I'm going to go ahead and castCure Wounds on myself.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Okay, cool, so you get some healing and then you
start filtering people out andyou stay back with Essel to
start boarding up.
Is there anything else that youwould like to do?
You're more than welcome toroll me an insight check.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Oh, what is that?
That's horrible, it's bad, it'sreal bad, isn't it?
That is a unnatural four.
An unnatural four.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
An unnatural four.
So was it a nat one.
Yeah, oh, okay, yeah, you 100%believe that boarding up these
windows is going to stop theshadow people.
Tight Hell yeah, dude, TightEssel's doing it because he
genuinely is like oh no boards,stop people.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Vance, vance with an.
A.
Yeah, do me a favor, lookaround and see if you can find
anything flammable.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
All right, burn in the church to the ground.
No, we got an idea though.
Okay, we do anything flammable.
All right, burn in the churchdegree.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
We do, I also have this idea and know what it is
and agree there's tons offlammable stuff.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
I mean it's a church, so most of the chairs seats
pews, yeah like pamphlets fortherapy.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Pamphlets for therapy yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
Pamphlets for therapy .
Yeah, essel just gets like somany yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
I'm going to let Essel keep boarding windows,
okay, and I'm just going tostart throwing anything I see
that's flammable outside thefront door, like towards the
patio.
Okay, cool or wherever theporch area is the entrance to
the church.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
They get closer.
Are you just getting people tothe exit?
Or are you actually starting tofilter people out?
I, I think if it's does itappear to be safe outside so you
don't know, because it goesunderground and north, so you
believe it's going to break thenorth wall of the city all right
.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Um, yeah, I think it's.
I mean 30 of them versus thethree of us and uh, it's not a
good sign.
So I think I'm actually I goingto shuffle them out.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
Okay, At about this time the first shadows start to
appear at the door.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
Nice.
Does this church make wine orwhiskey or anything like that?
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Kerosene yeah, they would probably have some wine,
wine, yeah.
Speaker 3 (21:04):
This is the Church of Our Lady Fireball.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Yeah that's what I was going to go for the whiskey
but wine is not flammable enough, so we're going to start off
with me and Essel are just goingto, because you can't, oh idea,
all right, I found a chair thatI was throwing outside.
I'm going to break said chair.
Okay, take a leg off of it.
(21:28):
I'm going to spark it and lightit on fire.
Speaker 1 (21:32):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
Yep, I'm going to throw it like a javelin while it
is on fire.
At the first one, I see, at thefirst one, you see At the first
shadow.
You said there was a startingapproach, first one.
I see I'm throwing this at him,give me your two hit.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
It is an improvised weapon, so it will use your
strength stat.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Jesus Christ.
A three does not hit.
Does it no, it does not itsoars right by the first one.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
Yes, it does.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Well, that's always a good noise, yeah well.
Best thing I can do at thispoint is I'm going to dash
towards etzel okay yeah and uh,I'm gonna basically grab him and
be like I missed.
They're coming fast and I'mgonna take his spot of hammering
(22:21):
things up okay, yeah, and thenwhat?
Speaker 1 (22:24):
what did you want him to do?
Speaker 2 (22:26):
uh, I'm asking him basically to go try to like, uh,
hold them off at the door andsee if he can hit one of them,
while I finish boarding the lastwindow.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Okay, cool, you start to filter people out.
Are you just pushing themthrough the tunnel or are you
going with them?
Speaker 3 (22:42):
No, I'm just kind of I'll be in after.
I'll be in after I got to makesure everyone gets out.
So I'm just shuffling themthrough and then I'll be in
after I'll be in after I got tomake sure everyone gets out, so
I'm just shuffling them throughand then I'll be coming back
into the church.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Yeah, what would you like to do before the first ones
begin to try and breach?
I thought you said one alreadymade it in, One was like at the
door which is now Essel isengaged with.
Speaker 3 (23:00):
Cool.
Can I hit him with?
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Sacred Flames.
Yeah, yeah, give me a.
It's a dexterity saving, throwon mine.
Speaker 3 (23:07):
Yep 12 or more 14 on the die.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Yeah, that's how it works.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
Don't have to like pause dramatically, oh baby.
Speaker 1 (23:15):
I dodged it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I didn't.
The Shadow did.
I have no beef personally withyou.
I didn't write this to TPK.
(23:35):
start over yeah right, just apersonal vendetta, we've all but
like I don't know if you'veplayed long enough, you've had
that guy.
That's like, oh and uh, ameteor hits you, yep, but okay,
that was thrilling.
Yeah, what a good time we alljust had.
Yep.
As essel engages with the firstone, he uses his sword and
cleaves a couple in half, butyou notice that as they approach
the door they aren't violentlycoming in, but they are
surrounding and as they surround, you see the tall, shadowy
(23:57):
woman up here in the front andshe goes.
Gentlemen, there's quite asimple option here.
The two of you and she pointsto you two seem to be a bit more
attuned to this world.
You have a simple choice youcan either die here or you can
(24:21):
come with me.
And if you come with me, all ofthese peasants or whatever
people, whatever you want tocall them, will be fine.
I just want you two.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
I told you she liked me.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
Stop looking at her like that, she goes.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
I am uncomfortable.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Are the people in the tunnel already?
Yes, everybody in the tunnel,except for Essel.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
It is the three of you.
Essel in the middle because heengaged the first couple.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
What kind of dragonborn is Essel Red?
So he's got some fire breath,he does.
He does Vince with an A.
I know you want to go with her.
It doesn't sound like a goodidea.
It sounds like she wantssomething inside of us.
Speaker 3 (25:12):
Yeah, yeah, and not in a good way.
No, no, no, no.
My college years are behind me.
Speaker 1 (25:18):
I thought you were going to be like well, I wanted
something inside her.
I left that on the table.
I didn't want to.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
But I mean, I think we got everyone out.
We could probably slip out theback because we got everyone to
accept.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
She goes.
This is interesting that you'retalking about this out loud.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
I mean, it's quietly Shut up.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
No, if she's got the building surrounded, she's
definitely going to be able toget to us in the tunnel.
I'm sure let's say we go withher and then maybe not.
I think that's a good idea.
Speaker 3 (25:52):
I don't think lies are a good thing to build a
relationship on.
Speaker 2 (25:54):
I think she's standing right fucking there
this is like I thought.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Maybe you guys, I can hear you.
Sorry, you didn't even say youlike whispered or nothing.
You just started talking toeach other like I just don't
exist.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Yeah, I have object permanence issues.
Oh yeah, I have CTE, pretty badCheck this out.
Whoa.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
And then she pops back up.
Boo, I thought.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
I defeated her for a second because she was gone.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
She clearly has some sort of high-level magic.
Can I roll Arcana to see if Ican figure out what it is?
Yeah, of course.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
As you guys kind of talk amongst yourselves, she
goes Gentlemen, I'm losing mypatience, I got a 17.
Okay, you can tell that thetype of magic that she is using
is illusion magic and it is offthe charts.
It's literally warping lightaround her dude.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
Look, I didn't trick some people in my past but you,
man, you are catfishing the hellout of everybody in this room
right now who are you really?
Because I'll go with you but Ifeel like you lying to me she
goes oh, who am I?
Speaker 1 (27:11):
I would I would say that entirely depends on the
situation.
I can be whoever I want to be.
And she snaps her fingers andshe becomes asshole.
And then she snaps her fingersagain and she becomes the king.
And she snaps her fingers again.
Kat Dennings, kat Dennings, katDennings.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Kat.
Dennings Kat Dennings KatDennings as she snaps her
fingers and becomes Z KatDennings.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
Kat Dennings, kat Dennings, kat Dennings, kat
Dennings, kat Dennings, as shesnaps her fingers and becomes
Zang and she goes.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
I can be anybody.
I think the question right nowis who did the two of you want
to be?
Do you want to be an obstacleor do you want to be a part of
something greater?
As?
Speaker 2 (27:46):
she grins there is no defeatingins.
Ah, there is no defeating her.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
No.
And there is no walking away,hang on.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Earmuffs.
Speaker 3 (27:56):
Earmuffs.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Oh, okay, yeah, of course.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
This is definitely not irritating the shit out of
me.
Speaker 3 (28:02):
I think we gotta go with her.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
We don't have a choice.
Yeah, it's not really much of achoice, unless you want another
one of those cold hands orthose things.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
How does Essel.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
Feel about this.
Essel is essentially slowly,like in the meantime, because
she's talking to you.
He has been falling back slowlyinto the church.
Speaker 3 (28:21):
Just Homer Simpson into the bush.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
Not abandoning you guys, but he can clearly suss
out that she wants you to.
She doesn't give a shit abouthim, which could be bad for
everybody, so he's safeguardinghimself to be able to run to
protect his people.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
In case, because she could be lying.
She could be lying about.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Oh, she's 100% lying.
She's lying about everything.
I know your type, ma'am, Ibelieved her.
I know you type, ma'am, Ibelieved her, I know you did.
Speaker 1 (28:52):
I don't trust you, so you don't believe that I will
keep all those people alive.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
No, I believe that you could be anyone and everyone
, but I don't believe you likebeing who you really are.
Speaker 3 (29:02):
I'd hand her one of those pamphlets.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Yeah, you solved my deep trauma riddle.
No, I don't think it's a deepriddle.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
I think it's very surface level, as you shapeshift
to anyone who you want, so youcan show off your power.
But what is this whole part ofsomething greater?
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Oh, she turns back into her original form and she
goes I don't change into who Iwant, I change into who I need
to be.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
I dated someone like that.
It's exhausting.
You keep talking likesomething's going to be.
I dated someone like that.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
It's exhausting.
You keep talking likesomething's going to happen.
It's called the secret.
I'm manifesting it.
Roll me for Riz, when a jokeroll hits reality too hard.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
That's a lot of matter.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
That's a lot of matter.
I got a real life version ofwhat would happen.
You go to say I won't punishreality too hard.
Oh, that's a lot of meta.
That one yeah, that's a lot ofmeta.
I got a real life version ofwhat would happen.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
You go to say I won't punish you too hard, you just
like fart loud.
It's just like it's like listenSwoop.
Speaker 3 (29:57):
It's like I think we're going to go with her.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Where are we going?
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Okay, so you guys are deciding to go with her.
We have no choice.
Speaker 3 (30:06):
Yeah, it doesn't really feel like we have an
option.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
There's always an option.
There's always an option, but Idon't want to die today.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Okay, not today, not today so she goes oh, so you'll
be joining me, then when are wegoing?
Oh well, that doesn't reallymatter.
Speaker 2 (30:22):
You said we could go with you, correct?
Speaker 1 (30:31):
And you have no idea where we're going.
No, I know where we're going,but why doesn't it matter to us?
Speaker 2 (30:33):
what we want to know, where we're going.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Let's just say the place that we're going is not
possible for you to know, it'snot possible for me, it's not
possible for me to understandwhat is or it's not on a map and
, as soon as you agree, sheapproaches and she does what she
originally tried to doforcefully, where she puts her
hands on your face as all threeof you sink into the ground.
Speaker 3 (30:53):
I don't like this.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Both of you make wisdom saving throws, as the
coldest you've ever felt goesacross your entire body 18.
16.
Speaker 2 (31:05):
Okay, so both of you succeed and will only take half
damage, this 16.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
Okay, so both of you succeed and will only take half
damage.
This cab sucks.
It does, so you'll take twomore necrotic damage.
So as you sink into the ground,neither one of you can see
anything.
It's not like you're seeingdark, but you literally see
nothing around you.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
See, this is what happens when you trust them.
Speaker 1 (31:33):
You guys can't hear each other.
You guys try and talk and itgoes into a void.
Speaker 3 (31:41):
That's good for the audio podcast yeah, Hang on.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Just let me fucking narrate.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
How about?
Okay, you want a differentnarration.
You write a ding, dang show,just get real hostile you know
what?
I think this is the last episode, as the darkness and the void
take over your bodies.
The two of you can't tellwhether it's been a minute, an
hour, whether it's been days orweeks, but after an undetermined
(32:09):
amount of time you start to seelittle specks of light appear
around you.
As suddenly, these specks oflight collapse in on you and you
appear in what looks like ajail cell.
The two of you are not together, but you could hear many people
(32:29):
around you.
Roll me insight checks.
Speaker 3 (32:32):
I'm like, oh no, I got in on my mushrooms again,
didn't I?
Speaker 1 (32:36):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Just in the void, you're just
like.
I'm sure this won't give mehorrendous hallucinations.
Speaker 3 (32:44):
You'll be able to find me because my terrible
bubble guts.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
No, you can't torture that information.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
Bad to me I oh my god , I would love to see that in
like a comedy sketch where theguy's like trying to torture
somebody, but the other dude'sjust ripping farting rancid.
So the guy's like he's like Iwill get you oh my god oh my God
, you're nasty dude 15.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
14.
15 and 14.
Both of you succeed.
And you hear the cries oftormented people all throughout
this hallway, just people cryingout for help as they seem to be
enduring a ton of pain.
And at that time you just hearmetal clanging, just one at a
(33:32):
time, just ting, ting, and it'sgetting closer and closer and
what turns the corner is whatcan only be described as a
horrendous chimera beast Rightdo I have all my equipment on
still?
Speaker 2 (33:50):
no ah beans?
Speaker 1 (33:52):
have we been wiped of all our equipment?
Speaker 3 (33:54):
yes, you are essentially just in commoner
clothes at the moment I lookaround to see if let me solo her
is around just a guy with a potstanding in the corner, just
like you.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Just gotta say something I'll be here and we're
all in individual cells.
Yes, I'm going to just straightBruce Lee it.
I'm going to sit downcross-legged and meditate.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
Oh, I'm sorry, I should have been a bit more
specific.
You guys are literally likestrapped down arms out.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
Oh yeah, that makes a difference.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So we're chained to a wall.
Speaker 3 (34:25):
No, like a table.
Speaker 1 (34:26):
A table A table that's leaned back, almost like
you're at the doctor's office inone of those leaning chairs
except you're just arms outstrapped like 45 degree angle.
Speaker 3 (34:35):
Well, I'd like to try to rip the straps off, okay.
Speaker 1 (34:40):
Give me an intelligence.
Oh, what Check.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Can I do strength?
Speaker 1 (34:47):
No, it's almost like the lady that has completely
enveloped her world in illusions.
It's a mind game.
Eleven, okay, you do feel somegive in it as the creature
approaches.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
Huh.
Speaker 1 (35:04):
Dolomir, do you have any initial reactions?
Speaker 2 (35:07):
Yeah, I realize I'm chained, I realize what happened
and I realize I lost track oftime and I've done these drugs
before.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
Okay, all right so.
Speaker 2 (35:19):
I close my eyes and I decide to meditate and focus on
my Feywild ancestry and see ifI can see my way out.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
Oh, okay, cool, Is that a class ability?
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Yes, well, it's a race ability, a race ability,
yeah, I can just meditate and.
Speaker 1 (35:36):
I can try to prevent being charmed Gotcha.
How long does that take?
Speaker 2 (35:41):
That is, I can do it once per long rest.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
Gotcha.
But there's no time associated.
It doesn't say 30 minutes, no,it's just wisdom saving Gotcha,
like time associated.
It doesn't say 30 minutes, itdoesn't say wisdom saving gotcha
.
As you try to break free and asyou begin to meditate, the
creature gets closer, as younotice that out of the palm of
its hands, blades are stickingout as it sharpens them and
clings them together, and as youmeditate and as you desperately
(36:11):
try and get free, it juststarts dragging it up and down
and across your chest, leavinglittle bitty cuts as she Is he
dual wielding.
Speaker 3 (36:20):
He's getting us both, or just me?
Speaker 1 (36:21):
No, no, no.
This is both happening to youguys, so you're both seeing and
experiencing the same thingthough you're not together, as
she appears in front of both ofyou now from your guys'
perspective.
You don't know that this ishappening to each other, right?
But clearly, from a narrativeperspective, you are both
(36:42):
experiencing this at the sametime.
As she goes.
I just have one simple question.
How is it that you saw me?
And that is to both of you.
We do vance first and thenwe'll go to dolomir I, I don't
know, I don't even know what youare.
(37:05):
The uh, chimera creature slowlypushes the blade a little bit
more onto your shoulder and shegoes.
I feel like you are telling methe truth, or.
And then she kind of pauses fora second, she goes.
It is very possible, and she'sjust kind of mumbling to herself
(37:25):
that he?
All right, I believe you.
And she begins to leave.
All right, I believe you.
And she begins to leave.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
Dolomir, how do you respond?
I didn't see you.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
I felt you, is this an ability that you were born
with?
Is this something that youfound?
No, you just feel creepy.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
You come around with that attitude and I just pick up
on it.
You got a vibe.
Speaker 1 (37:54):
She's like oh, thanks .
Speaker 2 (37:56):
It's definitely not what I was going for.
No, I'd have popped my balloon.
Speaker 1 (38:05):
And she goes.
The many years that I have beendoing things like this, there's
only been a handful of peoplethat have been able to detect my
presence or see through theillusions that I create amongst
this world.
And it's fascinating that tworandom individuals in the middle
of this little town justoutside of Sol Deus, a place
(38:29):
that I desperately needed andyou two arrive I'm not one to
really believe in coincidence,as the chimera pushes his blade
into your side and you take fourpsychic damage.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Well, why are you tricking people?
What's the point?
What do you gain out ofeverything you're doing?
Speaker 1 (38:52):
Well, what I gain is a strategic foothold for, let's
just say, my people.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
Who are your people?
What do you mean by your people?
Speaker 1 (39:04):
That is none of your concern.
I'm just simply here to findout how two what seemingly seems
as mundane individuals are ableto witness magic on this scale.
Speaker 2 (39:16):
Well, I mean, you're showing it off.
Y'all want nobody to look at it.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Yeah, we cut back to Vance and you have just been
through what seems like aneternity of pain, as this
chimera just toys with you overtime.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Yeah, I guess we cut back, like Vance is just talking
, he's like I know you'reprobably not listening.
You're real busy up there but,anything would help would be
great, just like a prayer, notprayer.
And you're reaching out to,just reaching out to.
Speaker 1 (39:50):
Just reaching out.
Okay, give me a.
Hmm, this is an interesting one, because you, as a cleric, do
have an ability.
Are you using your specificcleric ability, or is this more
of just dialogue?
Speaker 3 (40:09):
I don't think I have that, the channel divinity, yet
I have divine spark and turnundead.
Speaker 1 (40:16):
Oh, okay, so you don't have the ability yet.
Correct.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
So I'm just like reaching out, okay.
Speaker 1 (40:23):
As you reach out, it seems like a swelling begins in
your chest, where you start tofeel very empowered.
Give me a wisdom check withadvantage right now 18, 18.
Speaker 3 (40:40):
Okay, two on the first one, so thank god yeah
yeah, we'll get back to you injust a second.
Speaker 1 (40:46):
Remember that 18.
Okay, dolamir, she questionsyou for a little bit longer, as
you have also been getting justtoyed with by this horrendous
creature and I'm assuming you'retrying to keep your meditative
state as these questions andstuff are going on, to kind of
build up on on that fey abilityI want an advantage.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
roll, yeah, not to get meta.
Speaker 1 (41:14):
And I need you to also give me a wisdom saving,
well, a wisdom check, withadvantage right now Unnatural 21
.
It would have been wild if itwas a natural 21.
Right.
Speaker 2 (41:25):
And I got a D20.
I'd have been boy talk aboutillusions.
Just a Sharpie.
Speaker 3 (41:34):
Oh man, this dice doesn't have a 2, but it does
have a 21.
Yeah right, have you guys seenthe gambler's dice?
Speaker 1 (41:39):
It's got 3 1's and 3 20's On it so the 1, 2 and 3 are
all 1's and the 20, 19 and 18are 20's.
I like it.
I've thought about getting onefor like certain scenarios, but
I just found out about thatyesterday.
Anyway, back at it.
You see the way out.
And the way out isn'tphysically walking out that door
(42:01):
, but it is completely shuttingout what you believe these
illusions are.
And that is the wisdom that you, vance, have been granted by
this being that speaks to you ina deep tone and says well, you
can just get out whenever youwant.
You just have to believe thatyou are more powerful than these
(42:22):
illusions.
Oh cool, I just get up, youjust get up.
Speaker 3 (42:26):
Okay, it's easy, all right, all right.
Speaker 1 (42:31):
As soon as you feel that divine power swelling
through you, your handscompletely pass through the
shackles and Dolomir.
The moment that your fateancestry kicks in and that pulse
of just sheer energy surgesthrough you, your hands pass
through as well.
And the moment that they passthrough those shackles, all that
light that imploded on you tobegin with to create disillusion
(42:54):
explodes out.
Your body as the chimera isdestroyed and this we don't know
her name yet, but thisspiritual entity that has been
questioning you screams in painand disappears.
And both of you wake up inEssel's church with glowing,
(43:15):
bright red eyes and, in a momentof clarity where you realize
you're back, you pass out, andthat is where we're ending this
session you're starting to getgood at this.
Speaker 3 (43:28):
I'm trying.
Who's my dog?
Well, that has been episode 6of the monster monster podcast.
You're starting to get good atthis.
I'm trying.
What about dog?
Speaker 1 (43:33):
Well, that has been episode six of the Monster
Monster podcast.
My name is Tyler.
I've been your DM.
Thank you all for listening andI'm just going to pass it on to
Tyson.
Speaker 3 (43:41):
Hey, I'm Tyson Cox.
Thanks for listening.
You can find me everywhere atTyson Cox Comedy.
If you enjoyed this podcast,tell a friend, leave a review,
all those little things.
Speaker 2 (43:54):
They help more than you are aware of.
Oh yeah, and I'm Dolomir Sedrin, aka Brian Petrie.
You can find me at all things,at Brian Petrie Comedy, on all
the stuff.
I'm always somewhere near you.
Just holler at me if you wantme closer.
Speaker 1 (44:06):
All right, no-transcript.
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