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June 26, 2025 7 mins

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What would you tell your 16-year-old self? "Break some rules." And your 60-year-old future self? "It's all okay." These profound bookends of wisdom frame our fascinating "Beneath the Accent" segment, where we dive beneath surface conversations to discover the rich complexities of cultural identity and personal philosophy.

Our guest opens their heart, sharing powerful insights about self-protection and advocacy through the metaphor of a lion – when something matters deeply, "my claws come out and I stand big to protect whatever is behind me." This protective spirit extends to their wish for a superpower that could convince people about the greater good, addressing global challenges like poverty and unnecessary conflicts rather than focusing on divisive differences.

The conversation weaves through cultural celebrations, particularly Diwali, described as a time "full of hope and connection" marked by family gatherings, prayers, gift-giving, and the beautiful tradition of lighting lamps. We explore what makes a place feel like home – family connections first, but also simple comforts like "a good cup of tea." Perhaps most thought-provoking is our guest's one-word description of Canada: "complex." This complexity encompasses diverse peoples, cultures, and the transformative journeys immigrants experience from arrival onward, acknowledging both positive and challenging aspects of Canadian identity.

If you've ever wondered about the unseen stories behind accents, cultural transitions, or finding belonging in a new country, this episode offers genuine wisdom. Our guest leaves us with a powerful guiding principle for making decisions: ask whether your words or actions are "helpful, necessary, and kind." Isn't that a philosophy we could all benefit from embracing?

Subscribe to hear more authentic conversations that bridge cultural experiences and challenge our perspectives on belonging, identity, and human connection. Your story matters too – share your thoughts with us in the comments or on social media.

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Gurasis (00:02):
all right.
So now we're in the finalsegment.
I call it beneath the accent.
I'm going to ask a couple ofquestions.
You can answer them in one wordor a sentence, or how, so you
feel like the idea is just toknow more about you.
It's like a rapid fire, okay,rapid fire, okay.
So what advice would you giveto a younger self, and at what

(00:22):
age?
16 break some rules, okay.
And what would you like to sayto your 60 year old self?
It's all okay, okay.

Jyoti (00:33):
Describe a moment when you experienced a significant
cultural difference thatsurprised you the first time I
saw someone put water on theirhusband's feet and drink it no
way, really wow okay all sortsof feelings with that one okay,

(00:53):
that's so bizarre, okay.

Gurasis (00:57):
Um, what's that one dish from your home country that
always brings you comfort andnostalgia?
Saag Makki Dhirukti.
What's your favorite culturalfestival or celebration in
Canada, and how do you usuallycelebrate it?

Jyoti (01:13):
At Diwali.
I long for Diwali in India that.
I'll remember because of courseI was there the first seven
years, but I don't remember.
Here we celebrate by going tothe Kordwara, by going to our
family's, my sister's house, andthen my mom will always do a
prayer.
You know, the kids get giftsmoney usually and it's just that

(01:35):
collection of visiting people'shouses, giving sweets, and this
joyous moment of literallylighting you know's lamps around
our house, in front of ourhouse, and I think it's just
full of hope and connection.
Okay, and any cultural festivalin canada that you celebrate um,

(01:58):
I guess I celebrate christmasto a point, not the religious
aspect of it, but we put up atree, we do the gifts and again
it's more of the family and theconnection piece of it together.

Gurasis (02:12):
Okay, I see.
If you had to describe yourselfas any creature, what would it
be and why?

Jyoti (02:20):
I see myself as a lion Okay, sometimes with my big hair
physically, but I think I as alion, sometimes with my big hair
physically, but I think I havea very protective nature and if
there is something that I wantto dig into and stand by, then
my, my claws come out and Istand big and protect whatever

(02:41):
it is behind me that I'm tryingto protect.

Gurasis (02:43):
Awesome.
And if you could have onesuperpower, what would it be?

Jyoti (02:47):
Wow, that's a tough question.
I'm trying not to gosuperficial, like the ability to
fly or something right, becausethat would be a cool factor.
I don't know if it would serveanybody anywhere with me flying
around everywhere and thenfalling down with the weight of
snow falling.
Yes, or being eaten by an eagle,or something like that.
I think it would be more theability to mold, because I think

(03:13):
there's so much.
You know, we often say if theworld had more women leaders, we
would have less wars, betterdecision making power.
So not the ability to like, beable to read people's minds, but
the ability to be able toconvince people about minds, but
the ability to be able to, to,to convince people about the
greater good you know, to solvesome of our issues, like poverty
and like these silly wars thatwe come up against, and we we

(03:37):
use those and focus on themrather than the real problems
that the world has.
Okay, I want you to think aboutthat one deeper.
Maybe you'll get an email fromme tomorrow.

Gurasis (03:48):
Okay, if you could create this one law that
everybody has to follow, whoeverit be.

Jyoti (03:56):
Kindness.
So before you open your mouth,before you make a decision,
think about is this helpful, isit necessary and is it kind?
And I think in there you'll adecision.
Think about is this helpful, isit necessary and is it kind?
And I think in there, wrappedup, you'll find who is it
harming and maybe you'll take abetter decision.

Gurasis (04:13):
Absolutely so.
Home is where the heart is.
If you had to choose one thingthat makes you feel most at home
in Canada, what would it be?

Jyoti (04:21):
Obviously, my family my husband, children, my mom is
where my home is, but if we'relooking at non-human things, it
would be a good cup of ja.

Gurasis (04:36):
Okay, so finally describe Canada in one word what
a sentence Complex.
Why would you say that what asentence Complex?

Jyoti (04:43):
Why would you say that Complexity in everything, in the
people, in the differentcultures we have, in the changes
that happen to people once theyget off that airplane, from the
first time to the end of theirtime?
Here it's complex, and incomplex is the good and the bad.

Gurasis (05:03):
Wow, absolutely In between.
Yeah, and if you could leave meJyoti with one piece of advice,
what would it be?
Keep doing what you're doing.

Jyoti (05:13):
I have to say I only recently met you, but I am so
proud of you for picking up thetorch on this, and especially
being a male, and you're doingit.
Even the name of your podcastis just like you're putting
whatever the stigma is in bright, shining lights and saying here
it is and here is what someonewith a thick accent is capable

(05:35):
of doing, because I think you'reyou're being a beacon for
people to discuss these issues,for individuals like myself to
share our experiences, because Iknow that I'm not alone in my
experience.
You know you're not alone inyour experiences and it just
takes a few of us to rise up anddiscuss this and help others.
So thank you for what you'redoing.

Gurasis (05:57):
Thank you for your kind words and, lastly, how would
you describe your experiencebeing on the podcast today?

Jyoti (06:03):
Wonderful.
I had no notes, but I hadtalked to you on the phone so I
was quite comfortable and I knewit was going to be just a great
conversation.
And you have a very calming wayand you're vulnerable, so it
allows your speaker to bevulnerable as well.
So I appreciate that and I hopeyou keep doing that and using

(06:24):
your voice right for the greatergood.
But I think this is such awonderful idea.

Gurasis (06:29):
Absolutely, and was this something that you had like
, a certain expectation from thepodcast, and how was it like?

Jyoti (06:36):
My expectation was we're going to have a conversation
about some important things, butbecause I'm the subject matter
expert of my own life, I wasn'tworried.
No notes, no research wasnecessary.
This is I'm speaking from myheart, my head, and that's
exactly how it went.
I'm looking at the time.
I don't know where it went.
It was very quick and I thankyou for that as well.

Gurasis (06:58):
For making it easy for me.
Okay, awesome.
Thank you for saying that andthank you for being on the
podcast and adding value to meand to my listeners.
Thank you.

Jyoti (07:08):
Absolutely.
Thank you for having me.
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