My Top Everything

Hey, I think we're going to have to pull off at the next exit. No, it's number twooOOOOo OMG PULL OVER NOW I'M GONNA - 💩

Sorry listeners that are on a road trip, the last thing we want is for you, like us, to lose your fading grip on your bowels and sully your pantaloons! This week, our courageous hosts bare it ALL with stories about sh**ting their pants. No subtext, no metaphors, if you proceed with listening to this episode, do s...

🌞🌦️👗👒 OHHHH IT'S SUMMER TIME, BABY! Oh, you're telling me it's been summer for over a month? DON'T CARE, late, great, and looking to date is how we ROLL! 

Join us this week as we talk about our asbolute favorite, top, prime summer activities. Some of them may not be as you expect!

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I know you're reading this on an iPhone or Android device right now. Have you ever gone behind enemy lines, fraternized with the devil and tried to use the other one? Did you thusly throw that device straight into a wall or phone, run to a nearby couch, and scream into a pillow??

Then YOU might be just as neurotic as we are! Join us this week as we scream at each other about what "irrational" really means and try to get in the heads...

The Ick™ /ˈɪk/ noun

Used to describe a feeling of disgust that arises usually after a specific, often trivial, behavior. Or SOUNDS in the case of this weeks episode! (Thank you, Wikipedia, for the definition).

What sounds give our brave hosts the ick? What parasitic soundwaves reverse kick them right in the Misophonia? Listen and find out whether or not we scream and leave the restaurant when someone touches a Styrofoam to-go box jus...

🎶MACY GRAY, SAVE US!!!🎶

Today we take a break from our usual format, gather around the digital campfire, and tell our top 3 stories of US! No, not the United States, but WE, the co-hosts of the pod. Have we made ourselves clear? Do you understand now? Listen to this episode and bask in the blinding light of clarity.

➡️Also, go to the National Mustard Museum if you're in Wisconsin! https://mustardmuseum.com/

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Here at My Top Everything, we know you've been in a bad relationship. Maybe there were red flags you missed or actively chose to ignore, or maybe things were a little more subtle and only your friends and family could actually see the truth: 

You were in a secretly toxic relationship, entertaining the rest of us behind your back while you suffered your insufferable partner (or perhaps they suffered you). WHICH MEANS YOU, DEAR L...

Exercising is the worst, but what's the WORST of the worst? Join us this week as we dive deep and try to identify the most painful, terrible, miserable ways to stay fit and healthy. Have you ever passed out during yoga? Fallen from the top of a bouldering wall? Stood in a line for too long? What are YOUR most painful forms of exercise?

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What have we been up to in the 9 months when we weren't recording? Find out what we did with our gestation period that could've grown a full human baby. Broached topics: Podcast Edging, Everything's On the Table, Wittle Whittlers, Bird Straws, Worker Bees Want Work, Mara's Pet Dead Desk Fly, Where is Prairie Du Chein?, WE SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN ECON DEGREES, daily sleepovers, and Cara's Big Headstand of 2024!

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If there's one episode you won't want to miss, it's this one. We start off by responding to a VERY interesting letter that may or may not make the case as to why a certain organization is cultlike. AND we saved our best picks for our #1 spots, including cults we've stumbled into during our early 20s. Broached topics include: Media Officers Seem Like Police Officers, How To Become A Supreme Leader, Convenient Methods for Joining Cul...

Some of us had an easier time than others thinking of cults we might just join. But we're not examining what that means! We talked about cults for so long, we had to break this episode into two parts. Broached topics include: Alien Scientists, Our Cult Family Name, Can You Trust PETA's Website, Running for the Hills Naked, and iPhone vs. Android. 

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Boy Howdy! Buckle yourselves in for a wild ride as we brave the depths of high school and relive our most embarrassing moments.*** If you're an adult who knew us during this time, please, skip the first twenty or so minutes of this podcast. It involves periods. 

Broached topics include: Post-Hand Embarrassment, How to Insert a Tampon, Asking Boys to Dance, Creepy Teachers, The Pain of Existing at 15, Psychotic Girl Crushes, and...

As summertime approaches, we review our biggest pet peeves while on vacation. Join us as we recount our most annoying moments on vacation and try not to name actual names. Watch us perform mental gymnastics as we complain about what pretty much everyone would complain about! 

Broached topics include: How to Form a Habit, Cara's Sugar High Horse, Mara Starting Shit, Lines and More Lines, WHAT'S THE PLAN vs. TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT...

It's Autism Awareness Month! Our high school friend Tyler, founder of the Barefoot Autism Challenge, suggested that we talk about unique ways to paint in honor of this month's theme, Barefoot Art. Broached topics include: Is Art Physical?, Painting with Pets, Collecting the Blood of Your Friends, the Trajectory of Horse Tail Swishes, and What IS Microsoft Paint? 

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It's time for a topic that is discussed at 4th grade lunch tables across America: what animal would you want to be turn into? Mara discovers she wants to be kept. Marian goes for the land, air, and water trifecta. Cara gets freaky with butt juice and polygamy. Join us as we argue over which animal would give us the best life. 

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We're ringing in the New Year with our top resolutions we'd like to achieve before the year-end. Some of us have long, laborious goals; others, a headstand that they believe will take ten days to master. Broached topics: The Height of the Stakes, #ChangeOurPodToMET, How To Intro a Podcast, Mentally in 2024, Pepper Farms Remembers, HOW TO SEARCH TIKTOK, Annual Nipple Stares, The Point of a Political Conversation, The Length of A Res...

Everyone loves a good animated film. Some of us even love not-so-good animated films. Luckily, our childhood best friend Mackenzie is with us to set the record straight on ALL animated films, because she's pretty much seen every single one in existence. See what films made her long list below!

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