October 6, 2025 • 11 mins
Selling often feels uncomfortable, especially when you didn’t start your business to become a salesperson. But what if the discomfort comes from how we think about sales, not the act itself?
In this episode, I share a mindset shift that’s helped me (and many others) approach selling in a way that feels natural, confident, and aligned with our values. We’ll talk about how genuine connection, clear messaging, and belief in your offer can turn sales from something you dread into something you’re proud of. If “selling” still makes you squirm, this conversation is for you.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Janice Hostager (00:05):
I'm Janice Hostager.
After three decades in themarketing business and many
years of being an entrepreneur,I've learned a thing or two
about marketing.
Join me as we talk aboutmarketing, small business, and
life in between.
Welcome to my Weekly Marketing.
(00:26):
Okay, show of hands.
How many of you like selling?
Although I can't actually seeyour hands, I am going to guess
it's not a lot of you.
Honestly, I don't really loveit either.
But let's get real for a second.
Most of us didn't start ourbusinesses because we wanted to
be salespeople.
(00:47):
We started because we love whatwe do.
Maybe it's coaching, ordesigning, or bookkeeping, or
whatever it is, you name it.
But when it comes to thatdreaded moment, we actually have
to sell what we offer, right?
And suddenly it feelsuncomfortable.
We don't want to sound pushy orfake or like that smarmy used
(01:08):
car salesman stereotype we allhave in our heads.
So we either avoid sellingaltogether or we do it in a way
that feels kind of awkward,which makes the other person
feel awkward too.
But selling doesn't have tofeel that way.
In fact, when it's done well,selling feels natural.
It feels like a service, itfeels like helping someone take
(01:29):
the next step toward thesolution they've been looking
for all along.
And that's what today's episodeis all about - how to sell
without feeling salesy.
By the end, you'll know how toreframe sales so it feels
genuine, aligned, and evenenjoyable.
If you stick with me to the end, I'll share a free resource
(01:53):
that will help you put today'sideas into action.
Okay, so let's start byshifting the way we think about
sales.
Selling is not about hustling.
It's not about twistingsomeone's arm.
Selling is about helping.
Think about it.
Your potential customer alreadyhas a problem they want solved.
Your offer is simply the bridgethat helps them get from where
they are right now to where theywant to be.
When you frame sales as aservice, it feels a lot less
(02:16):
scary, doesn't it?
You're not taking their money,you're giving them a solution.
I remember, early in my business, I had one of my first sales
calls with somebody and I was sonervous.
I had rehearsed lines, I hadbullet points, I was so ready to
pitch, and you know what?
The whole conversation feltreally stiff and awkward.
(02:36):
She could tell, I could tell,and she didn't buy.
But then, a few weeks later, Ihad another call, but this time
I decided to take a differentapproach.
I just asked questions, and Ilistened, and I showed her where
my service fit into solving herproblem.
And she said, "Wow, I feel likeyou get me.
" And she signed up.
(02:56):
And that's when it all clickedthat sales is just about
connection and relationship.
But there are reasons peopledon't like sales and here are a
few of them.
First of all, pushiness.
We've probably all hadexperiences with a pushy
salesperson who doesn't give ustime to think or doesn't leave
us alone, right?
When somebody is pushing theiragenda on us instead of
(03:19):
listening to yours, you feelkind of unseen and cornered.
And when I'm feeling cornered,I don't know about you, but I
want to run.
Also, manipulation.
Nobody wants to feelmanipulated.
Pressure tactics, fake urgency,or maybe making you feel guilty
for not buying can leave areally bad taste in your mouth,
(03:41):
and nobody likes that either.
We also don't like when peopletalk about themselves a lot.
People sa y things like "I'veaccomplished this thing or I've
done that.
You want people to have accessto your background, for sure,
and if you've got relevantexperience to naturally pull
into the conversation, by allmeans do.
But customers want to hearabout themselves and how you
(04:02):
will help them, not about you.
And finally, one more reasonpeople don't like sales is the
feeling that they're beingclosed.
This is when the focus is ongetting the sale, not building a
relationship.
We buy from people that we know, like and trust.
A buyer understands you want asale, but it needs to be on
their terms, not rushed, notforced.
(04:23):
You want to be available, butyou need to help them feel in
control as well.
All of these smarmy saletactics don't work anymore.
People are way too savvy and,frankly, too tired of being sold
to.
What they want is a genuineconversation with somebody who
understands them, their needsand their pain.
(04:44):
So here's the secret - sellingwithout being salesy comes down
to connection and confidence.
Connection means listening morethan you talk.
That's asking open-endedquestions like "what's your
biggest frustration withwhatever it is you sell?
" It means repeating their ownwords back to them so they feel
heard, even using their ownwords in the text of your sales
(05:06):
page, your content and yourwebsite.
And connection also meansshowing empathy.
"I know how overwhelming thatfeels.
A lot of my clients come to mefor that very same reason.
" If you've been there and a lotof us have when we're selling
to our customers, let them knowthat, connect with them in that
way.
When you connect with somebodyon a human level, the sale
(05:27):
becomes a natural next step.
The second piece is confidence.
First, confidence in your offer.
If you know your servicechanges lives, you're not
pushing, you're inviting.
If you're anything like me,you've poured out your heart and
soul into your product.
Be proud of the results youknow that they will get.
Next, confidence in your value.
(05:51):
Don't apologize for your priceor water it down.
It may be that some peoplecan't afford it.
That's real life.
Don't discount it.
Know the price of thetransformation it will bring.
That's where the value lies.
And finally, confidence in yourability to deliver it.
Share stories of past results,case studies, or even your own
journey.
Show receipts.
(06:11):
Show how it's changed the livesof others.
When you show up with connectionand confidence, people feel
safe saying yes.
Okay, you're probably saying"Oka, janice, but how do we do
this in our own business?
" Okay, so here's a fewpractical steps: First of all,
follow my Trail to the Saleframework.
Selling is not the first step.
(06:33):
It's one stage in the journey,further on the journey.
By the time someone gets to thesell stage, you've already
built awareness, trust, andcredibility.
You should have already built arelationship with them.
If you want my Trail to theSale framework, you can get it
by going to janicehostagercomforward slash trail.
I'll add that link to the shownotes too.
(06:56):
Also, invite, don't push.
Instead of saying "you shouldbuy this," try "based on what
you've shared.
Here's what I'd recommend asyour next step.
" Again, nobody likes to bepushed into an offer, and
realistically, it'll end upbiting you in the end, since
those are the people that aremore likely to ask for a refund
when it doesn't work out forthem.
And then also, if you havemultiple offers, then prescribe.
(07:20):
Don't pitch.
Think of yourself like a doctor.
They don't list every possiblemedication, they prescribe the
one that fits your condition.
You're doing the same thingwith your offer.
For example, if you're aphotographer, instead of saying
"I have a package that includesthree hours, 50 edited photos
and an album.
" nstead, you might say, "basedon what you told me about
(07:41):
wanting candid family photosthat actually feel natural, I'd
recommend a lifestyle session.
It gives us time to captureyour family's real personalities
without feeling rushed.
" See the difference?
One is a pitch, the other is aprescription.
Next, handle objections withempathy.
People are always going to haveobjections.
If someone says "it feelsexpensive", can you respond
(08:10):
"Nope.
If someone says "This feelsexpensive", you can respond by
saying "I hear you.
A lot of my clients felt thatway before they started.
Can I share how they got pastthat?
" Then share how they were ableto change your life with the
offer.
It's hard to put a price tag onchanging someone's life.
Next, give choices.
Sometimes people just need tofeel in control.
Offer two or three packages orpayment options that will give
(08:31):
them some control over what theybuy.
And then finally, keep itconversational.
Use stories, analogies andreal-life examples.
Although I provide a script inmy Modern Marketing Mastery
course, along with other toolsand recommendations for sales
calls, it's never meant to beverbatim.
For me, when I'm on a Zoom callwith a prospective client, it
(08:52):
helps to have an outline that'llkeep me on task without
sounding like a robot.
Now let's cover a few things youwant to avoid in a sales call.
First, talking too much.
If you're doing all the talking, you're not learning what they
actually need.
Ask open-ended questions, andget to know them without feeling
like you're interviewing them.
Make it natural andconversational.
(09:13):
Find some things you have incommon.
Also, you want to avoid usingjargon.
Your customer does not careabout proprietary frameworks.
They care about the result, howyou've helped other people,
what you can do for them.
You also want to avoid beingvague.
Just be really clear andspecific about what you can do
for them.
(09:33):
Being vague isn't going to helpyou make the sale.
They want details.
They want to know how you willhelp them.
And finally, don't apologizefor your pricing.
Your price reflects your value.
Don't undercut yourself anddon't apologize.
Practice your sales calls andespecially practice saying the
price and then staying silent.
(09:53):
We get uncomfortable aroundsilence.
It feels awkward.
You could remind them ofeverything that your offer
includes.
If you're feeling tempted todiscount, you could also have a
free add-on that you can include.
That's so much better thandiscounting the price.
Also, some experts disagreewith this one, but before I hop
on a sales call, I send outinformation about my business
(10:15):
and what I provide and theresults that other people have
received.
In that packet, I include myprice range so there are no
surprises on the call.
That helps with the awkwardnesson both of our accounts.
So here's the bottom line.
Selling doesn't have to feelsalesy.
It's not about pressure.
It's about developing arelationship where you earn the
(10:35):
opportunity to ask for the sale.
When you focus on connectionand show up with confidence, the
right people will feel drawn tosay yes.
And the best part, when yousell this way, both you and your
client walk away feeling good.
If you want extra help withthis, I've created a free
resource called the OverwhelmEntrepreneur's Marketing
Strategy Playbook.
(10:55):
It'll help you map out yourTrail to the Sale so that when
you get to the sell stage, it'llfeel natural and aligned.
You can grab it, as I saidearlier at janicehostagercom
forward slash trail.
Remember, sales isn't aboutconvincing people, it's about
helping them solve a problem.
Thanks for tuning in today.
For more information aboutanything we talked about, visit
(11:17):
myweeklymarketingcom forwardslash 128.
If you know somebody else whohates selling, please forward
this episode to them.
Thanks again, I'll see you nexttime.
Bye for now.
I'm Janice Hostager.
After three decades in themarketing business and many
years of being an entrepreneur,I've learned a thing or two
about marketing.
Join me as we talk aboutmarketing, small business, and
life in between.
Welcome to my Weekly Marketing.
(00:26):
Okay, show of hands.
How many of you like selling?
Although I can't actually seeyour hands, I am going to guess
it's not a lot of you.
Honestly, I don't really loveit either.
But let's get real for a second.
Most of us didn't start ourbusinesses because we wanted to
be salespeople.
(00:47):
We started because we love whatwe do.
Maybe it's coaching, ordesigning, or bookkeeping, or
whatever it is, you name it.
But when it comes to thatdreaded moment, we actually have
to sell what we offer, right?
And suddenly it feelsuncomfortable.
We don't want to sound pushy orfake or like that smarmy used
(01:08):
car salesman stereotype we allhave in our heads.
So we either avoid sellingaltogether or we do it in a way
that feels kind of awkward,which makes the other person
feel awkward too.
But selling doesn't have tofeel that way.
In fact, when it's done well,selling feels natural.
It feels like a service, itfeels like helping someone take
(01:29):
the next step toward thesolution they've been looking
for all along.
And that's what today's episodeis all about - how to sell
without feeling salesy.
By the end, you'll know how toreframe sales so it feels
genuine, aligned, and evenenjoyable.
If you stick with me to the end, I'll share a free resource
(01:53):
that will help you put today'sideas into action.
Okay, so let's start byshifting the way we think about
sales.
Selling is not about hustling.
It's not about twistingsomeone's arm.
Selling is about helping.
Think about it.
Your potential customer alreadyhas a problem they want solved.
Your offer is simply the bridgethat helps them get from where
they are right now to where theywant to be.
When you frame sales as aservice, it feels a lot less
(02:16):
scary, doesn't it?
You're not taking their money,you're giving them a solution.
I remember, early in my business, I had one of my first sales
calls with somebody and I was sonervous.
I had rehearsed lines, I hadbullet points, I was so ready to
pitch, and you know what?
The whole conversation feltreally stiff and awkward.
(02:36):
She could tell, I could tell,and she didn't buy.
But then, a few weeks later, Ihad another call, but this time
I decided to take a differentapproach.
I just asked questions, and Ilistened, and I showed her where
my service fit into solving herproblem.
And she said, "Wow, I feel likeyou get me.
" And she signed up.
(02:56):
And that's when it all clickedthat sales is just about
connection and relationship.
But there are reasons peopledon't like sales and here are a
few of them.
First of all, pushiness.
We've probably all hadexperiences with a pushy
salesperson who doesn't give ustime to think or doesn't leave
us alone, right?
When somebody is pushing theiragenda on us instead of
(03:19):
listening to yours, you feelkind of unseen and cornered.
And when I'm feeling cornered,I don't know about you, but I
want to run.
Also, manipulation.
Nobody wants to feelmanipulated.
Pressure tactics, fake urgency,or maybe making you feel guilty
for not buying can leave areally bad taste in your mouth,
(03:41):
and nobody likes that either.
We also don't like when peopletalk about themselves a lot.
People sa y things like "I'veaccomplished this thing or I've
done that.
You want people to have accessto your background, for sure,
and if you've got relevantexperience to naturally pull
into the conversation, by allmeans do.
But customers want to hearabout themselves and how you
(04:02):
will help them, not about you.
And finally, one more reasonpeople don't like sales is the
feeling that they're beingclosed.
This is when the focus is ongetting the sale, not building a
relationship.
We buy from people that we know, like and trust.
A buyer understands you want asale, but it needs to be on
their terms, not rushed, notforced.
(04:23):
You want to be available, butyou need to help them feel in
control as well.
All of these smarmy saletactics don't work anymore.
People are way too savvy and,frankly, too tired of being sold
to.
What they want is a genuineconversation with somebody who
understands them, their needsand their pain.
(04:44):
So here's the secret - sellingwithout being salesy comes down
to connection and confidence.
Connection means listening morethan you talk.
That's asking open-endedquestions like "what's your
biggest frustration withwhatever it is you sell?
" It means repeating their ownwords back to them so they feel
heard, even using their ownwords in the text of your sales
(05:06):
page, your content and yourwebsite.
And connection also meansshowing empathy.
"I know how overwhelming thatfeels.
A lot of my clients come to mefor that very same reason.
" If you've been there and a lotof us have when we're selling
to our customers, let them knowthat, connect with them in that
way.
When you connect with somebodyon a human level, the sale
(05:27):
becomes a natural next step.
The second piece is confidence.
First, confidence in your offer.
If you know your servicechanges lives, you're not
pushing, you're inviting.
If you're anything like me,you've poured out your heart and
soul into your product.
Be proud of the results youknow that they will get.
Next, confidence in your value.
(05:51):
Don't apologize for your priceor water it down.
It may be that some peoplecan't afford it.
That's real life.
Don't discount it.
Know the price of thetransformation it will bring.
That's where the value lies.
And finally, confidence in yourability to deliver it.
Share stories of past results,case studies, or even your own
journey.
Show receipts.
(06:11):
Show how it's changed the livesof others.
When you show up with connectionand confidence, people feel
safe saying yes.
Okay, you're probably saying"Oka, janice, but how do we do
this in our own business?
" Okay, so here's a fewpractical steps: First of all,
follow my Trail to the Saleframework.
Selling is not the first step.
(06:33):
It's one stage in the journey,further on the journey.
By the time someone gets to thesell stage, you've already
built awareness, trust, andcredibility.
You should have already built arelationship with them.
If you want my Trail to theSale framework, you can get it
by going to janicehostagercomforward slash trail.
I'll add that link to the shownotes too.
(06:56):
Also, invite, don't push.
Instead of saying "you shouldbuy this," try "based on what
you've shared.
Here's what I'd recommend asyour next step.
" Again, nobody likes to bepushed into an offer, and
realistically, it'll end upbiting you in the end, since
those are the people that aremore likely to ask for a refund
when it doesn't work out forthem.
And then also, if you havemultiple offers, then prescribe.
(07:20):
Don't pitch.
Think of yourself like a doctor.
They don't list every possiblemedication, they prescribe the
one that fits your condition.
You're doing the same thingwith your offer.
For example, if you're aphotographer, instead of saying
"I have a package that includesthree hours, 50 edited photos
and an album.
" nstead, you might say, "basedon what you told me about
(07:41):
wanting candid family photosthat actually feel natural, I'd
recommend a lifestyle session.
It gives us time to captureyour family's real personalities
without feeling rushed.
" See the difference?
One is a pitch, the other is aprescription.
Next, handle objections withempathy.
People are always going to haveobjections.
If someone says "it feelsexpensive", can you respond
(08:10):
"Nope.
If someone says "This feelsexpensive", you can respond by
saying "I hear you.
A lot of my clients felt thatway before they started.
Can I share how they got pastthat?
" Then share how they were ableto change your life with the
offer.
It's hard to put a price tag onchanging someone's life.
Next, give choices.
Sometimes people just need tofeel in control.
Offer two or three packages orpayment options that will give
(08:31):
them some control over what theybuy.
And then finally, keep itconversational.
Use stories, analogies andreal-life examples.
Although I provide a script inmy Modern Marketing Mastery
course, along with other toolsand recommendations for sales
calls, it's never meant to beverbatim.
For me, when I'm on a Zoom callwith a prospective client, it
(08:52):
helps to have an outline that'llkeep me on task without
sounding like a robot.
Now let's cover a few things youwant to avoid in a sales call.
First, talking too much.
If you're doing all the talking, you're not learning what they
actually need.
Ask open-ended questions, andget to know them without feeling
like you're interviewing them.
Make it natural andconversational.
(09:13):
Find some things you have incommon.
Also, you want to avoid usingjargon.
Your customer does not careabout proprietary frameworks.
They care about the result, howyou've helped other people,
what you can do for them.
You also want to avoid beingvague.
Just be really clear andspecific about what you can do
for them.
(09:33):
Being vague isn't going to helpyou make the sale.
They want details.
They want to know how you willhelp them.
And finally, don't apologizefor your pricing.
Your price reflects your value.
Don't undercut yourself anddon't apologize.
Practice your sales calls andespecially practice saying the
price and then staying silent.
(09:53):
We get uncomfortable aroundsilence.
It feels awkward.
You could remind them ofeverything that your offer
includes.
If you're feeling tempted todiscount, you could also have a
free add-on that you can include.
That's so much better thandiscounting the price.
Also, some experts disagreewith this one, but before I hop
on a sales call, I send outinformation about my business
(10:15):
and what I provide and theresults that other people have
received.
In that packet, I include myprice range so there are no
surprises on the call.
That helps with the awkwardnesson both of our accounts.
So here's the bottom line.
Selling doesn't have to feelsalesy.
It's not about pressure.
It's about developing arelationship where you earn the
(10:35):
opportunity to ask for the sale.
When you focus on connectionand show up with confidence, the
right people will feel drawn tosay yes.
And the best part, when yousell this way, both you and your
client walk away feeling good.
If you want extra help withthis, I've created a free
resource called the OverwhelmEntrepreneur's Marketing
Strategy Playbook.
(10:55):
It'll help you map out yourTrail to the Sale so that when
you get to the sell stage, it'llfeel natural and aligned.
You can grab it, as I saidearlier at janicehostagercom
forward slash trail.
Remember, sales isn't aboutconvincing people, it's about
helping them solve a problem.
Thanks for tuning in today.
For more information aboutanything we talked about, visit
(11:17):
myweeklymarketingcom forwardslash 128.
If you know somebody else whohates selling, please forward
this episode to them.
Thanks again, I'll see you nexttime.
Bye for now.
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