July 1, 2025 • 40 mins
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Are you a soon to be mom, a seasoned mother, or simply interested in the world of birth? You’re in the right place!
In this episode, we discuss:
- Birth at Mercy Hospital in Portland, Maine
- The benefits of upright birthing and what Theresa thought about my favorite tool in my doula bag - The Birth Sling
- Midwifery care and doula support
- Birth Photography in Maine
- The importance of maintaining a warrior mentality throughout life
- ….and a whole lot more!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Theresa (00:00):
when you are in a life-changing stage of life, it
always pays to have a warriormentality versus a fear-based
mentality.
Because it's very easy to befearful of the stages of
pregnancy.
It's very it's kind of almosteasy to be fearful of the
outcome and it's you know.
You can be fearful of labor,you can be fearful of new,
(00:22):
newborn hood.
You can be fearful of having atoddler, you can be fearful of
having a teenager.
There's just so many things tobe fearful of new, newborn hood.
You can be fearful of having atoddler.
You can be fearful of having ateenager.
There's just so many things tobe fearful of and have that kind
of mentality.
But it doesn't pay like to dosome more, you know to, to push
through and have a warriormentality where, yes, we will
tackle that, like, yes, thiswill pass, this won't last
forever, we can get through this.
(00:42):
I think that it there's alwaysa benefit to that.
It was when I took a birthingclass.
They said do not get in thefear loop.
When you start contractions,don't fear the next contraction,
because you're not going to beable to ride it if you're
fearful even before it starts.
And they just said just know,we'll end and have a warrior
mentality, and I think that'sjust very, very important,
(01:06):
because if you have a can-domentality, it will serve you
better than having a fearful orhesitant mentality.
Angela (01:18):
I'm Angela and I'm a certified birth photographer,
experienced doula, childbirtheducator and your host here on
the my Maine Birth podcast.
This is a space where we sharethe real-life stories of
families and their unique birthexperiences in the beautiful
state of Maine, from our state'sbiggest hospitals to birth
center births and home births.
(01:39):
Every birth story deserves tobe heard and celebrated.
Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply
interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you.
Welcome back.
This is episode 117.
Today's birth story guest isTeresa.
(02:00):
Teresa reached out to me earlierthis year, just before she was
due to birth her fourth baby,and she was interested in my
sisterhood birth package, whichis birth photography and doula
support.
Normally I am fully bookedseveral months in advance, but
occasionally I'm able to accepta few more families that inquire
with me last minute.
So not long after getting toknow each other in our initial
(02:22):
consultation, I got the callthat her labor had started and
that she was heading into thebeautiful birthing suites at
Mercy Hospital.
During her labor, she utilizedone of my favorite tools that I
have in my bag as a doula, andthat is the birth sling.
The birth sling is an amazingway to support upright and
active labor positions, nomatter where you choose to give
(02:43):
birth.
I have a few of these, becauseevery family that I work with
through my sisterhood packagegets one to use for those final
weeks of pregnancy and duringyour labor.
If that's something you feelcalled to, so definitely listen
through to this whole episode tohear all about her experience
with that.
And I'm also excited for thisepisode because Teresa's mother,
(03:04):
anna, joins us to share allabout a very special postpartum
soup.
All right, hey, teresa, welcometo my Maine Birth.
Hi so to jump right into it,would you start by sharing a
little bit about you and yourfamily, sure?
Theresa (03:22):
I am, I would say, a Mainer.
We moved to Maine when I wasseven years old.
We lived in New York City.
My parents are immigrants,they're Chinese immigrants and
I'm first generation and wemoved to.
Well, my parents lived in NewYork City but my dad got a job
(03:44):
at BAW when I was like two yearsold, so he was living in Maine
and we were commuting back andforth on the weekends, which was
kind of crazy, but we were usedto it.
My mother really enjoyed herlife in New York City.
Especially her parents werethere and they would help us
with child care, help her withchild childcare for me and my
(04:05):
brother, and it was really nicefor her to be in a city and have
like a like a strong Chinesecommunity.
And she worked at the worldtrade center and as an
accountant, so she really hadlike a fancy job.
She was in the bombing in 93 onthe 72nd floor.
Her office, her and her entireoffice got out safe.
But it was at that point thatthey reassessed and moved to
(04:28):
Maine.
So I've been in Maine since Iwas seven and grew up in
Freeport and then I went away tocollege.
I moved back to New York cityfor a year after college and at
that point, um, they, I've comefrom a restaurant family and
they my mother was opening arestaurant and they needed a
(04:49):
manager.
So I moved back and I openedthat restaurant and I've been in
the industry ever since amazing.
Angela (04:58):
Now, jumping into your birth stories, would you start
by sharing how you found out youwere pregnant and what your
thoughts were in choosing yourcare?
Theresa (05:07):
I found out I was pregnant, for me very late in
the process, which was onlyabout six weeks.
But my previous threepregnancies, each time I, I
swear I felt like implantationcramping, like immediately, and
I knew I was pregnant,oftentimes before the test could
(05:28):
confirm it, and I would say,well, I know I'm pregnant.
And Joel would say, well, thetest was negative.
And I just scream at him I knowI'm pregnant.
So each time I knew I waspregnant.
But this time there was so muchgoing on, like in life and with
the other kids, that I, I guesseither I wasn't as in touch with
(05:48):
my body or I feel like,sometimes, like pregnancy
hormones are it's kind of likeany other, like drug that you
would introduce into your body,like the more you expose
yourself to it, like the moreyour body normalizes it.
I remember the first time I waspregnant, I remember like the
wave of hormones being sointense that sometimes I would
(06:09):
like have blurred vision andlike sunspots, and it was so
extreme and I just thought likeI can't, I cannot function right
now.
And then each time I didn'tfeel any symptoms, I didn't feel
.
I didn't feel differentsymptoms, I didn't feel.
I didn't feel different I, Iguess I just the the distraction
(06:29):
of life really really kind ofover, like glossed over the what
was going on with me internally.
And when I was probably right,when I was pregnant, like right
like two weeks in, like when thecycle hasn't even started yet,
my daughter asked me if I waspregnant, and she was only three
years old at the time and Isaid no, I'm not pregnant.
Like why would you ask me that?
(06:50):
She said because your stomachlooks different.
And I just kind of wrote it off.
And then, four weeks later waswhen I found out I was pregnant
and I was shocked, complete andutter surprise baby.
Wait, I mean, three was mybonus.
The third child was my bonusbaby, and this time I was
completely and utterly shocked,completely taken back by it.
Angela (07:11):
Wow, oh my goodness, what were your thoughts in
choosing your care?
Theresa (07:16):
I ended up at Mercy for the first of my because I was
going through the midwives andthe midwives deliver at Mercy.
So I knew of mercy because Ihad been with friends who had
birthed at mercy and I justloved it.
I just really I really likemercy.
I guess I don't know I don'thave much of a basis for
comparison because I'd onlyvisited suites at Maine Med and
(07:38):
heard stories and those are thetwo big players where I am.
But I knew I wanted to gothrough the midwives.
I just, I guess I didn't reallyknow why I chose them, but I
think I wanted the midwife routeversus OB and I'm glad I did.
It was very small practice, justlike four midwives and like two
(07:59):
medical assistants and oneperson in the office.
So it just felt very small andfelt very intimate and I liked
the care that I got there and Ivery much like Mercy's labor and
delivery department.
After going into spontaneouslabor and having a natural birth
for the first time, when I gotpregnant with my second, I did
(08:20):
consider doing a home birth andI I talked with a few like my
friend is a midwife and and Italked with her and I think,
just like the, the financialswere not that different and
considering I just I just likethe setup of Mercy so much that
I decided to go back for thesecond and then for the third
and fourth, I didn't reallyconsider another option.
Angela (08:41):
So how are you feeling throughout that pregnancy?
Theresa (08:47):
option.
So how are you feeling?
Throughout that pregnancy Ifelt great, I'm fortunate, I
enjoy being pregnant.
I have very positive, positiveexperiences being pregnant and I
I kind of view pregnancy like Iam the type of person just in
like my, my personal andprofessional life where I just
like to optimize like everymoment and I like to like find
the best outcome and the bestuse of time and the best use of
(09:07):
that resource.
So for me, being pregnant islike the ultimate multitasking.
It's like, oh yes, I'm doingthis and I'm growing a human and
I just love being pregnant.
Yeah, I love like every day isdifferent and I liked each
pregnancy.
As I was pregnant, I liked likechallenging myself to have like
a better pregnancy or to likeget like more fiber and like to
(09:31):
get more water and like havemore regular bowel movements.
And you know what can Ioptimize this time, what can I
use from my past experiences?
So I very much like beingpregnant and I think I like
postpartum too.
It's a very peaceful time and Ithink it's it's nice to have a
(09:54):
fast recovery because I had allmy babies in such rapid
succession that my body knowswhat to do afterwards.
So I feel great, fortunately,yeah, that's amazing.
Angela (10:01):
So how close in age are your kids?
That's amazing.
So how close in age are yourkids?
Theresa (10:04):
They're all two years apart roughly.
The first two are exactly,almost exactly exactly two years
apart, like with a matter oflike three days, and then the
age gap between the second andthe third is two years and three
months, because I didn't want ashort age gap like that again.
But then the fourth being anaccident, the age gap is like 22
(10:25):
months, not an accident, asurprise, that's a euphemism,
right.
Angela (10:29):
Right.
Would you share a little bitabout why you decided to hire a
birth photographer?
That sort of happened later onin your pregnancy, right?
It wasn't long before you wentinto it.
Theresa (10:39):
Yes, yeah, you and I didn't start talking until I was
pretty late into the pregnancy.
You and I didn't start talkinguntil I was pretty late into the
pregnancy, the third time.
That my third labor wasdifferent than my first two.
That because my support personbecame my best friend.
She was game to be a supportperson in any way, be it take
care of my two children as Iwent to the hospital or to come
(11:01):
to the hospital with me.
And last minute we all decidedthat the best thing was for her
to come to the hospital with me.
And when I went to the hospitalwith my, when I went into labor
for the third time and I went tothe hospital with my best
friend, the energy was totallydifferent in the room.
It was like my midwife was thefounder of the midwifery and she
(11:23):
just had this really calmenergy about her and and she's
just been, you know, throughhundreds of labors and I just
knew I was in good hands.
And she said is your husbandcoming?
I said no.
I said my best friend's hereand she said I love all female
birds, so never, never thoughtabout it like this, but I love
it too.
So the the energy was verydifferent.
(11:45):
It was very playful or like youknow, it was very light and and
I felt like my best friend wasalmost there in place of a doula
, like she was wonderful.
And then because, because I'dgiven birth before, I didn't
really need a lot of assistancefrom the nurses, and I think
there were like two nurses thatwere like there to support me
and one of them just said, likeyou know what can I do?
And I said, can you takepictures to support me?
And one of them just said, likeyou know what can I do?
(12:06):
And I said, can you takepictures?
And she didn't.
She took great photos.
She took great photos.
And so when I thought about thelast what is very likely the
last birth, I thought, man, I'mnot going to get that lucky
again and have like a nurseready and able to take photos,
and it's just, it's just sospecial and it's just a special
life experience and I would beremiss if I didn't have photos
(12:31):
or if I didn't have tangiblememories from it.
So, yeah, I reached out to youand that's how that was my job
process for photos Turned out,actually, that I had the same
nurse that took the photos frommy third pregnancy.
She was my nurse again or shewas like in the circulation of
(12:51):
nurses that I had again when Iwent into labor for the fourth
time.
So I got to see her again andwe said thank you so much for
the photos and I said we lovethem so much that I actually I
got in touch with Angela becauseI I couldn't, you know, I
couldn't bear the thought of nothaving photos.
Angela (13:07):
Oh, that's so cool, yeah , so now, what were the final
weeks and then days leading upto when your labor started?
Like for you, final days.
Theresa (13:17):
There were not a lot of tells that it was the final
days, but the final weeksleading up I was so, so heavy
and slow.
Final weeks leading up I was so, so heavy and slow and my home
is very tall and the doing thestairs with the young children,
with the bedrooms so high up,was it was a lot.
So I depend, I leaned on,leaned on Joel a lot for child
(13:38):
care because I just wasn't,wasn't mentally there and was
really hard.
I felt like my children werebecoming feral because I
couldn't really like holdboundaries or discipline when I
couldn't move.
I couldn't string together manythoughts and, yeah, it just was
slow.
But I felt good and wow, it'slike I don't even remember.
(13:59):
I just remember feeling slowand feeling like I didn't know
when the baby was going to come.
But I have gone as early as twoweeks early.
So I just went into prematurenesting mode and I just
organized and cleaned and sortedthings and rearranged kids'
rooms for optimal entertainmentafter the baby was born.
Angela (14:18):
Yeah, that's so helpful, rotating all those toys one
last time.
So how did your labor start?
Theresa (14:31):
I was going to labor overnight, always at like 2am.
I realize now because I keptnotes on each labor.
That was my previous way todocument the pregnancies and
labor.
I just kept notes like ajournal on my phone and I
realized that I always went intolabor at 2 am or around that
time and I think it was therainstorm it was raining.
With my second she was bornduring the full moon.
(14:51):
I went into labor during thefull moon and she was born
within minutes of the peak ofthe full moon.
So definitely some barometricpressures at play.
But it was raining and I wokeup and started having
contractions and I called mybest friend and I said it's
happening.
And I just said it's starting.
(15:12):
I did not have false labor inthe days leading up to real
labor, it just started.
It was kind of most peaceful,rolling contractions to start.
I feel like contractions are alot more bearable with water
intact.
So I've done it both ways and Idefinitely prefer my water
being intact.
I had the most peculiar laborthis time where I could stop my
(15:32):
labor fully just by sitting.
I could just sit and it wouldstop so I could just take a
break at any time.
It was just crazy.
I've never experienced that.
But when I get to the hospitalI had the nurses check me, check
me, and it was like a game atthat point, like how dilated am
I?
And the nurses said she'shoping for something more than
(15:57):
five.
And then she checked me and shesaid eight.
And we all celebrated, whichwas very funny and yeah, when we
got to the hospital, just we,we could very calmly discuss my
plan because I could stop mylabor at any time and just have
a nice calm conversation.
But the caveat was that theminute I stood up, I would, I
would pay for it Like I wouldexperience all the contractions
(16:18):
with full force that I didn'thave while I was sitting.
Angela (16:22):
Yeah, and that's really interesting because you ended up
birthing upright.
So would you share a little bitabout your thoughts on the
birth sling?
Theresa (16:31):
I loved that sling and then everyone who came into
contact with it loved it too.
The midwives were like, how dowe get one for the office?
Like how do we get one of these?
I loved the birth swing.
I feel like the birth swingyeah, I was, I was upright, but
I think I was like bent overmost of the time until I finally
started pushing on the stool.
But I started pushing on thestool because my legs were
(16:54):
giving out, because I had tostay standing in order to have
like have like fruitfulcontractions.
I had to stay standing and Ithink that I started having
contractions at 2 am and Istarted pacing the house at like
between 4 and 6 am and then Ithink the baby was born, really
(17:16):
2 pm.
I don't quite remember.
But whenever my midwife broughtthe stool it's because I said
my leg was cramping she said,well, you've been standing for
12 hours, so I ended up birthingon the stool.
But I love the swing.
The swing it like it just is aninstrument to help you, help
your own body.
(17:36):
It's like giving you so muchlike input or like that's not
the word I'm looking for, um, Idon't know.
I feel like it just gives youinformation on your body Like,
oh, like I can read, I can kindof redirect, like something is
holding like me up so I canredirect my strength to like my
(17:57):
arms, or I can redirect mystrength to my legs because like
my upper body is beingsupported or like I can lean
back so I can alleviate, likeholding myself up like, and like
my back body is supported so Ican more engage my front body.
I really really like the swing.
I mean the thing that Iappreciate most about like going
(18:19):
a midwife route is like justlike the freedom to move, and
that's what I like most aboutnatural labor is just the
freedom to move and I I feellike the birth swing is just
like the ultimate aid in thatprocess.
Angela (18:35):
Yeah, your midwife followed you and yeah, you were
kind of hanging out in the birthsling by the door.
She just, yeah, let you claimthat power, like.
What was that like for you?
Theresa (18:47):
It was wonderful.
I feel like like there's justso much like respect given and
like through that practice andthe nurses and the hospital
there, and I um trying to thinkback, if I have.
Oh, yeah, I was.
I was in the bed all threetimes, except except this time,
and I didn't know up from down,but after looking at the photos
(19:08):
I realized my midwife was justcrouched on the ground under me
where all the action was,because she just followed me
where I was and yeah, I justknew.
I just knew that's where Ineeded to be.
Angela (19:19):
Yeah, that intuitive movement, yes, for sure.
So how was your immediatepostpartum time?
Theresa (19:33):
immediate postpartum time.
I remember it's being veryintense because I was, I was
sitting and I was just kind ofall exposed and I was shaking
all over and, I think, maybe alittle cold too after um, after
exerting that much, and I thinkthat it was my second hardest
labor.
For sure.
The two labors before then werenot as intense and I remember
(19:54):
not having to work very hard thelast two labors, but this one
was a lot of work.
I pushed for 10 minutes, whichfor my previous two births I
only pushed one time.
But this time I pushed about 10minutes and I think that I
could have had more contractionsbut I just wanted to be
finished, so I pushed myselfover the edge and so then
(20:18):
postpartum, I felt all the aftereffects of that and I think the
moments after birth are alwaysvery intense.
This one was was pretty intenseand I was shaking and I think
that, like the, the, theheightened emotion was built
upon by my mother coming in likejust minutes after birth and
(20:40):
she was so like it's such, such,I don't know such shock and
exuberance and she was so happyand kind of shocked and she's
very empathetic, so I think itwas a lot for her to see me
immediately post-birth andshaking, but I think it's better
(21:00):
that way that she didn't see mein the throes of birth.
I think that maybe it would havebeen too intense for her and
then too intense for me to seemy mother so worried.
But she came in afterwards andshe was still worried, but she
was also happy and very relievedand she had been roaming the
halls.
She didn't know how to getinside the birthplace.
(21:24):
She had been roaming the hallsso I think she was very relieved
to have found me and yeah, butI think that it was wonderful.
I was just.
I was just sitting and holdingmy baby and my mother was
holding me and it was wonderful.
It's a lot nicer than being ina hospital bed.
Angela (21:41):
Yeah, that was so, so sweet.
Was there tearing, I didn'ttear.
Theresa (21:48):
I didn't tear and my recovery was great.
I think I felt a little moresore just because of the.
For me it was extra pushing.
I felt a bit sore, like Ihadn't felt sore in a while or
like I did not feel sore with mythird.
She had a very small andcooperative head.
(22:08):
She had a very small andcooperative head.
She's just such a cooperativebirth.
But this time I felt a bit sorebut otherwise I felt great.
I felt great.
It was my smallest time betweenbirths, so I feel like my body
just knew what to do.
I hadn't been that long sinceit had been in that condition
previously and, yeah, I great.
(22:30):
I probably did a lot of thingsthat would not be recommended
for a postpartum woman to do,like install running boards on a
car.
I did that because I didn'treceive.
I didn't get a new vehicleuntil four days postpartum, so I
moved all the car seats bymyself and it's a higher car, so
(22:52):
I purchased and installedrunning boards myself.
I thought it would be a funpostpartum project.
Angela (22:58):
Wow, how are you feeling after that?
Theresa (23:01):
It felt good to move my body.
I feel like sometimes sorenessis compounded if you kind of
baby that spot, whereas if youget freshly oxygenated blood in
those areas, like, I think it'sgood.
I think it's good to move.
Angela (23:14):
So I think, had you mentioned, your mom was making
you some special soups that werelike family recipes for your
postpartum.
Theresa (23:23):
Yes, there's quite a strict postpartum regimen that
the Chinese follow.
One is just being warm andbeing kept warm and having warm
soups and nourishing broths.
There is a soup that not a soupbut like a stew that is made
and it's supposed to sit and itis made of trotters, which are
(23:46):
pig's feet, and ginger and hardboiled eggs and lots of brown
sugar and dark soy sauce whichis kind of like a caramelized,
like soy sauce.
So it's just very dark, darksoup and I think it's honestly
supposed to mimic visually mimicafterbirth, like it's very dark
(24:09):
and like you know, it kind oflooks bloody.
It's like very, very dark brownand the idea is that once
you're no longer bleeding orpassing clots, the soup is
supposed to be eaten then andbecause trotters or pig feet
have so much like fat andcollagen, it's supposed to
(24:31):
replenish what you lost.
Mama, can you tell more aboutthe soup?
What soup Go to girl, my girl,paul, here's the expert.
Hi this is my mother, hannah.
Anna (24:50):
After she born the baby.
And then our traditions needsome ginger ginger root.
You make the soup with chickenwith some like the pork feet,
because the skin have somecollagen and then the help her
(25:16):
Ginger is to push the air out.
That's our tradition thing.
We put some like dry mushrooms,because that's a natural
mushrooms Like a root Clean yourinside black, inside the areas
black, push out.
(25:39):
Just like if in hospital afterbaby born they push your stomach
like a push like the black out.
But my, our stuff you eat after, eat after it, help you push
that stuff out, clean inside thesystem.
And then the they give morelike um, protect your body
(26:02):
because you lose a lot of blood,a lot of energy, ginger, just
just all our, don't matter whatage, even though now you every
day have like a three-piece feshginger you're chewing every day
.
That's clean your system topush the bad out, the air out,
(26:23):
and then you don't have a lot ofair in your stomach.
Then you never have like astomach hurts, heartburn or
something.
We don't have that kind ofproblems.
And then never have like astomach hurts, half one or
something, we don't have thatkind of problems.
And then we have like somemushrooms that all like um,
because the um or herbs like akind of dry vegetables after
(26:46):
we're soaking stuff and puttogether with the chicken or
wine.
We put a little rice wine too.
But beginning we don't put thatmuch because you need to give
birth for the baby Ginger isgood Ginger and then just make
the soup more like a calcium,something inside, help the new
(27:11):
mother get more energy back andthen other things after 15 days
later, because the blood alreadystopped Before she have, we
think about have one more onemonth or one and a half months
the baby be born.
We already started to cook somevery special things like
(27:36):
vinegar, pork feet and some.
The vinegar is not like asupermarket vinegar.
That vinegar at least theirnatural, natural vinegar, soaked
for long times we call it blackvinegar or mature vinegar.
Theresa (28:00):
Or rice and rice and herbs and it is actually
delicious vinegar.
If you ever like, you can getit into in an Asian market, not
a regular grocery store.
But black vinegar is veryaromatic and it's actually
delicious addition to Asianfoods, like anything that's very
(28:23):
fatty yeah, it's a fatty, oranything that's very fatty.
The mature vinegar is a greatcomplement to fatty foods For a
lot of ginger.
Anna (28:33):
We peel the skin, the ginger skin, and then we use the
wok to stir-fry.
Let them dry and then put thevinegar together, cook for like
one hour and then let them cooland then every week just keep it
.
Don't let it get mold orsomething, kill the drain.
(28:55):
Every week just reheat, reheat,let them burn.
After the baby born 15 days, wejust put a hot feed egg all
together, put inside the gingerand vinegar stuff, then you cook
together, put inside the gingerand vinegar stuff, then you
cooked every day.
Just give a little bit for thefor the mother to eat.
(29:17):
And what's that for mama?
What is that?
For the same thing, just likepush the bacteria out and no
more blood in your stomach, inyour earrings, because why the
woman like a other.
Later they have a earrings,have problems, have a cyst,
(29:38):
something.
But our traditions, or clean upafter you born the baby, clean
up everything the bad bacteria.
Theresa (29:46):
So mom would you say there's a?
There's a soup that you eatright after the baby is born.
Then after you stop bleeding,there's a different soup.
Yeah, both are for pushing outbacteria and cleaning out your
arteries.
Yes, to prevent healthcomplications later in life.
Anna (30:05):
Just don't leave any black breathing inside, just clean up
all the system, my system, veryclean.
And then when your next parents, parents the parent of the baby
, not any something inside thebad material, just clean.
I think our traditions like,because we have 5,000 history, a
(30:32):
lot of good things, they keepit.
The generation past generation,that's my.
I remember when I have her andmy son, my mom already told me
to do this and then my mom saiddoes her mother teach her to do
that?
That's all generation bygeneration.
(30:52):
In China, after the baby born weare very careful, like a big
hat, don't let them get a wing,because they say if too cold, it
gets sick.
Because you on that time youare very your immune system is
not that strong like before,easy to get sick, so we don't go
out.
But you know it's not thatstrong like before.
It's easy to get sick, so wedon't go out.
(31:12):
But before it's not very clean,they don't know how to keep
yourself, protect yourself.
But in our country we never letpeople wash hands right away
because they say after the babyis born, the whole body, the uh
(31:34):
course, I bought him a horse,yeah, the painful disability, uh
, painful disciple.
So whole body, the pave allopen.
Yeah, easy to get any uhdisease, any cold, because
you're very tired, not energy tofight with any disease, any
drink.
So we're very protective forthe mother just born the baby.
(31:59):
We don't let other people comein the house, just one or two,
but they make sure they clean.
So in other cases.
To hold the baby, even to givethe woman to the mother to eat
all the stuff.
Use the hot water.
Born to stop no drink.
Make sure, even though longtime ago they don't have like
now they already know to cookall the stuff hot water.
(32:22):
They don't have alcohol, theyjust use that kind of uh the to
to try to kill all the germs,protect the new mother.
I think it's good because Ifeel, even though now next year
I'm 70 years old, I'm okay.
Theresa (32:39):
One thing you said those leg injections, those
anti-inflammatory drugs, canmake you have less wrinkles she
says that the collagen in thepig, in the pig's feet, are um,
will prevent wrinkles too oh,good thing, yeah, we.
Anna (32:59):
We eat a lot of pig feet, skin or something, not, not the
fat things.
Theresa (33:03):
We take the fat things out, just eat the uh so yeah,
once the fat is rendered out ofthe skin and the collagen, that
is what is ingested.
Um, so it's less like eatingthe fat and, rendered out of the
skin and the collagen, that iswhat is ingested.
So it's less like eating thefat and more.
Anna (33:15):
I'm okay, huh, I don't have that much wrinkle, oh my
gosh, you look great that isamazing my mom.
Even though my mom she passedaway on 80 years old.
She still walk.
Just take a bus, come to Maineto visit her when she have her
first baby, but have friendscome together with her.
(33:37):
But she walk very well and thenshe skis very good too.
Oh, wow, I think that thistradition is a help.
I don't have a, I don't do alot of research, but they just
from the all the family for thetradition help.
I don't have a, I don't do alot of research, but they just
from all the family for thetradition.
We all eat like this.
I push her, don't let her goout, put her hair on something,
(34:01):
but she listens good, I justdon't want to when her get older
and get problems someday.
Some people like a shrink thehair like this, don't know they.
They say, because you don't puta lot of after baby born to put
a lot of calcium to, to, uh,refill your system, I don't know
(34:23):
, I'm, I'm okay yeah, that'samazing.
Angela (34:26):
Thank you so much for sharing all of that.
Anna (34:28):
I really very nice talk to you and then if we need
something, I can help, we share.
We're all women.
Theresa (34:37):
I have one Chinese friend.
Growing up in Maine it's notvery common to have a Chinese
community but I did.
I have one Chinese friend andshe is a similar age to me and I
remember the first time that Ihad one Chinese friend and she
is a similar age to me and Iremember the first time that I
had a child.
She said she's she's, um, she'sa chef, so she knows all about
(34:59):
like cultural foods.
And she said that she consultedher mother on how to make the
soup for me, like the postpartumsoup with the trotters and the
vinegar and the ginger.
And her mother said well, youcan't take her mother's
(35:24):
privilege away to make her thesoup.
So I think it is very heavilycultural that there's a whole
routine and community and ritualinvolved in caring for the
mother postpartum.
I think that's quite beautiful.
Angela (35:38):
Yeah, it really is, and it's so important and I love
hearing about all of that.
Theresa (35:44):
That's very cool about the soup that I didn't know
until this time around is that Ihate ginger.
I am a chef and I am Chineseand I hate ginger.
I don't like eating it.
I like the flavor Ginger tea,great.
I just hate eating ginger.
So my mother had to force me toeat bits of this soup Because
(36:06):
you're supposed to drink thebroth but you're also supposed
to eat the solids, but I hateginger.
And she like cause you'resupposed to drink the broth but
you're also supposed to eat, eatthe solids, but I hate ginger.
And she said she said eat it,try it.
And I said oh, I hate ginger.
And then she took a bite of itand she said oh, this ginger is
very mild.
And she so the ginger issupposed to be indicative of the
child's temperament and my son,my, my fourth born son, is he's
(36:31):
very sweet and mild.
I don't know if he'll stay thatway, but he's incredibly sweet.
He's just happy and he laysthere and he watches and he
observes and he tracks and hesmiles and he laughs and if he's
hungry he'll just complain alittle and if he's tired he'll
just complain a little.
And anyway, she said that hisginger is is very mild and she
(36:53):
said that my ginger was bitterlyspicy.
Angela (36:59):
Oh my gosh.
Theresa (37:00):
She seems to think that I'm the most difficult child
that ever existed.
So she said that your gingerwas so spicy.
Angela (37:07):
Oh my gosh, that's really interesting as, as a
final question, if you were togive advice to someone who's
expecting, or even new parents,what would be the biggest thing
you'd want to share?
I?
Theresa (37:21):
would say that this applies to kind of all stages of
life, but when you're in alife-changing stage of life,
that it always pays to have awarrior mentality versus a
fear-based mentality.
Because it's very easy to befearful of the stages of
pregnancy.
It's very it's kind of almosteasy to be fearful of the
(37:43):
outcome and it's you know, youcan be fearful of labor, you can
be fearful of new, newborn hood.
You can be fearful of having atoddler.
You can be fearful of having atoddler, you can be fearful of
having a teenager.
There's just so many things tobe fearful of and have that kind
of mentality.
But it doesn't pay like to dosome more.
You know to, to push through andhave a warrior mentality where,
yes, we will tackle that.
(38:04):
Like, yes, this will pass, thiswon't last forever, we can get
through this.
I think that there's always abenefit to that.
It was when I took a birthingclass.
They said do not get in thefear loop.
When you start contractions,Don't fear the next contraction,
because you're not going to beable to ride it if you're
(38:25):
fearful even before it starts.
And they just said you know,just know we'll end and have a
warrior mentality and I I thinkthat's just very, very important
, because if you have a can-domentality, it will serve you
better than having a fearful orhesitant mentality.
Angela (38:46):
Yeah, definitely.
I agree with that.
So much it's.
Yeah, just having that mindsetshift can make all the
difference.
Yes, can I ask you how you feltwhen you saw the photos after
your birth?
Theresa (39:00):
Oh, I just thought they were so beautiful and it was so
nice to to see it from adifferent vantage point.
I just to have the experiencein your head is is just not
enough.
It's so monumentous.
I think, just to see it from adifferent point of view, like I
think in one of the photos thatyou took it was my favorite one
I'm just hunched over the babyand it's just me holding the
(39:21):
baby and that's all I see.
And I see my midwife sitting onthe floor smiling at me and my
best friend is behind me andshe's got her arms up in victory
.
And you know, that wasn't myexperience and it's nice to see
that, holistically, this was theshared experience and I just I
loved them and I'm soappreciative and thankful that
(39:43):
you did that for me.
Thank you.
Angela (39:47):
Oh my gosh.
Well, you're welcome.
It was my honor.
All of the births that I attendare really just such an honor
to to witness you know, youclaiming your power and birthing
your baby.
It's so magical, so thank youfor letting me witness.
Um, yeah, it was such an honorchatting with you today, teresa,
(40:07):
and hearing hearing your shareyour story.
Thanks for taking the time tochat with me and come on today.
Theresa (40:14):
Thank you so much I'm glad my mom was here too.
Angela (40:17):
Me too.
Before you go, I just want toremind you I have a ton of
resources for pregnancy andbirth.
If you're pregnant, whetheryou're a first time mom or if
this is your fifth baby, I wantyou to check out the show notes,
because I have some freetrainings and free downloads
that you can sign up for, aswell as the link to access my
(40:37):
labor of love, a comprehensive,self-paced online childbirth
education course.
I created this coursespecifically for moms who don't
want to be told what to do,regardless of where you're
birthing or who you're birthingwith, and I'd honestly love to
teach you everything that I knowso that you can prepare for an
(40:58):
autonomous birth experience andprepare to step into your role
as the leader of your birthjourney.
So click to the show notes,check out all of those links and
, if you ever have any questions, feel free to DM me at my main
birth over on Instagram.
when you are in a life-changing stage of life, it
always pays to have a warriormentality versus a fear-based
mentality.
Because it's very easy to befearful of the stages of
pregnancy.
It's very it's kind of almosteasy to be fearful of the
outcome and it's you know.
You can be fearful of labor,you can be fearful of new,
(00:22):
newborn hood.
You can be fearful of having atoddler, you can be fearful of
having a teenager.
There's just so many things tobe fearful of new, newborn hood.
You can be fearful of having atoddler.
You can be fearful of having ateenager.
There's just so many things tobe fearful of and have that kind
of mentality.
But it doesn't pay like to dosome more, you know to, to push
through and have a warriormentality where, yes, we will
tackle that, like, yes, thiswill pass, this won't last
forever, we can get through this.
(00:42):
I think that it there's alwaysa benefit to that.
It was when I took a birthingclass.
They said do not get in thefear loop.
When you start contractions,don't fear the next contraction,
because you're not going to beable to ride it if you're
fearful even before it starts.
And they just said just know,we'll end and have a warrior
mentality, and I think that'sjust very, very important,
(01:06):
because if you have a can-domentality, it will serve you
better than having a fearful orhesitant mentality.
Angela (01:18):
I'm Angela and I'm a certified birth photographer,
experienced doula, childbirtheducator and your host here on
the my Maine Birth podcast.
This is a space where we sharethe real-life stories of
families and their unique birthexperiences in the beautiful
state of Maine, from our state'sbiggest hospitals to birth
center births and home births.
(01:39):
Every birth story deserves tobe heard and celebrated.
Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply
interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you.
Welcome back.
This is episode 117.
Today's birth story guest isTeresa.
(02:00):
Teresa reached out to me earlierthis year, just before she was
due to birth her fourth baby,and she was interested in my
sisterhood birth package, whichis birth photography and doula
support.
Normally I am fully bookedseveral months in advance, but
occasionally I'm able to accepta few more families that inquire
with me last minute.
So not long after getting toknow each other in our initial
(02:22):
consultation, I got the callthat her labor had started and
that she was heading into thebeautiful birthing suites at
Mercy Hospital.
During her labor, she utilizedone of my favorite tools that I
have in my bag as a doula, andthat is the birth sling.
The birth sling is an amazingway to support upright and
active labor positions, nomatter where you choose to give
(02:43):
birth.
I have a few of these, becauseevery family that I work with
through my sisterhood packagegets one to use for those final
weeks of pregnancy and duringyour labor.
If that's something you feelcalled to, so definitely listen
through to this whole episode tohear all about her experience
with that.
And I'm also excited for thisepisode because Teresa's mother,
(03:04):
anna, joins us to share allabout a very special postpartum
soup.
All right, hey, teresa, welcometo my Maine Birth.
Hi so to jump right into it,would you start by sharing a
little bit about you and yourfamily, sure?
Theresa (03:22):
I am, I would say, a Mainer.
We moved to Maine when I wasseven years old.
We lived in New York City.
My parents are immigrants,they're Chinese immigrants and
I'm first generation and wemoved to.
Well, my parents lived in NewYork City but my dad got a job
(03:44):
at BAW when I was like two yearsold, so he was living in Maine
and we were commuting back andforth on the weekends, which was
kind of crazy, but we were usedto it.
My mother really enjoyed herlife in New York City.
Especially her parents werethere and they would help us
with child care, help her withchild childcare for me and my
(04:05):
brother, and it was really nicefor her to be in a city and have
like a like a strong Chinesecommunity.
And she worked at the worldtrade center and as an
accountant, so she really hadlike a fancy job.
She was in the bombing in 93 onthe 72nd floor.
Her office, her and her entireoffice got out safe.
But it was at that point thatthey reassessed and moved to
(04:28):
Maine.
So I've been in Maine since Iwas seven and grew up in
Freeport and then I went away tocollege.
I moved back to New York cityfor a year after college and at
that point, um, they, I've comefrom a restaurant family and
they my mother was opening arestaurant and they needed a
(04:49):
manager.
So I moved back and I openedthat restaurant and I've been in
the industry ever since amazing.
Angela (04:58):
Now, jumping into your birth stories, would you start
by sharing how you found out youwere pregnant and what your
thoughts were in choosing yourcare?
Theresa (05:07):
I found out I was pregnant, for me very late in
the process, which was onlyabout six weeks.
But my previous threepregnancies, each time I, I
swear I felt like implantationcramping, like immediately, and
I knew I was pregnant,oftentimes before the test could
(05:28):
confirm it, and I would say,well, I know I'm pregnant.
And Joel would say, well, thetest was negative.
And I just scream at him I knowI'm pregnant.
So each time I knew I waspregnant.
But this time there was so muchgoing on, like in life and with
the other kids, that I, I guesseither I wasn't as in touch with
(05:48):
my body or I feel like,sometimes, like pregnancy
hormones are it's kind of likeany other, like drug that you
would introduce into your body,like the more you expose
yourself to it, like the moreyour body normalizes it.
I remember the first time I waspregnant, I remember like the
wave of hormones being sointense that sometimes I would
(06:09):
like have blurred vision andlike sunspots, and it was so
extreme and I just thought likeI can't, I cannot function right
now.
And then each time I didn'tfeel any symptoms, I didn't feel
.
I didn't feel differentsymptoms, I didn't feel.
I didn't feel different I, Iguess I just the the distraction
(06:29):
of life really really kind ofover, like glossed over the what
was going on with me internally.
And when I was probably right,when I was pregnant, like right
like two weeks in, like when thecycle hasn't even started yet,
my daughter asked me if I waspregnant, and she was only three
years old at the time and Isaid no, I'm not pregnant.
Like why would you ask me that?
(06:50):
She said because your stomachlooks different.
And I just kind of wrote it off.
And then, four weeks later waswhen I found out I was pregnant
and I was shocked, complete andutter surprise baby.
Wait, I mean, three was mybonus.
The third child was my bonusbaby, and this time I was
completely and utterly shocked,completely taken back by it.
Angela (07:11):
Wow, oh my goodness, what were your thoughts in
choosing your care?
Theresa (07:16):
I ended up at Mercy for the first of my because I was
going through the midwives andthe midwives deliver at Mercy.
So I knew of mercy because Ihad been with friends who had
birthed at mercy and I justloved it.
I just really I really likemercy.
I guess I don't know I don'thave much of a basis for
comparison because I'd onlyvisited suites at Maine Med and
(07:38):
heard stories and those are thetwo big players where I am.
But I knew I wanted to gothrough the midwives.
I just, I guess I didn't reallyknow why I chose them, but I
think I wanted the midwife routeversus OB and I'm glad I did.
It was very small practice, justlike four midwives and like two
(07:59):
medical assistants and oneperson in the office.
So it just felt very small andfelt very intimate and I liked
the care that I got there and Ivery much like Mercy's labor and
delivery department.
After going into spontaneouslabor and having a natural birth
for the first time, when I gotpregnant with my second, I did
(08:20):
consider doing a home birth andI I talked with a few like my
friend is a midwife and and Italked with her and I think,
just like the, the financialswere not that different and
considering I just I just likethe setup of Mercy so much that
I decided to go back for thesecond and then for the third
and fourth, I didn't reallyconsider another option.
Angela (08:41):
So how are you feeling throughout that pregnancy?
Theresa (08:47):
option.
So how are you feeling?
Throughout that pregnancy Ifelt great, I'm fortunate, I
enjoy being pregnant.
I have very positive, positiveexperiences being pregnant and I
I kind of view pregnancy like Iam the type of person just in
like my, my personal andprofessional life where I just
like to optimize like everymoment and I like to like find
the best outcome and the bestuse of time and the best use of
(09:07):
that resource.
So for me, being pregnant islike the ultimate multitasking.
It's like, oh yes, I'm doingthis and I'm growing a human and
I just love being pregnant.
Yeah, I love like every day isdifferent and I liked each
pregnancy.
As I was pregnant, I liked likechallenging myself to have like
a better pregnancy or to likeget like more fiber and like to
(09:31):
get more water and like havemore regular bowel movements.
And you know what can Ioptimize this time, what can I
use from my past experiences?
So I very much like beingpregnant and I think I like
postpartum too.
It's a very peaceful time and Ithink it's it's nice to have a
(09:54):
fast recovery because I had allmy babies in such rapid
succession that my body knowswhat to do afterwards.
So I feel great, fortunately,yeah, that's amazing.
Angela (10:01):
So how close in age are your kids?
That's amazing.
So how close in age are yourkids?
Theresa (10:04):
They're all two years apart roughly.
The first two are exactly,almost exactly exactly two years
apart, like with a matter oflike three days, and then the
age gap between the second andthe third is two years and three
months, because I didn't want ashort age gap like that again.
But then the fourth being anaccident, the age gap is like 22
(10:25):
months, not an accident, asurprise, that's a euphemism,
right.
Angela (10:29):
Right.
Would you share a little bitabout why you decided to hire a
birth photographer?
That sort of happened later onin your pregnancy, right?
It wasn't long before you wentinto it.
Theresa (10:39):
Yes, yeah, you and I didn't start talking until I was
pretty late into the pregnancy.
You and I didn't start talkinguntil I was pretty late into the
pregnancy, the third time.
That my third labor wasdifferent than my first two.
That because my support personbecame my best friend.
She was game to be a supportperson in any way, be it take
care of my two children as Iwent to the hospital or to come
(11:01):
to the hospital with me.
And last minute we all decidedthat the best thing was for her
to come to the hospital with me.
And when I went to the hospitalwith my, when I went into labor
for the third time and I went tothe hospital with my best
friend, the energy was totallydifferent in the room.
It was like my midwife was thefounder of the midwifery and she
(11:23):
just had this really calmenergy about her and and she's
just been, you know, throughhundreds of labors and I just
knew I was in good hands.
And she said is your husbandcoming?
I said no.
I said my best friend's hereand she said I love all female
birds, so never, never thoughtabout it like this, but I love
it too.
So the the energy was verydifferent.
(11:45):
It was very playful or like youknow, it was very light and and
I felt like my best friend wasalmost there in place of a doula
, like she was wonderful.
And then because, because I'dgiven birth before, I didn't
really need a lot of assistancefrom the nurses, and I think
there were like two nurses thatwere like there to support me
and one of them just said, likeyou know what can I do?
And I said, can you takepictures to support me?
And one of them just said, likeyou know what can I do?
(12:06):
And I said, can you takepictures?
And she didn't.
She took great photos.
She took great photos.
And so when I thought about thelast what is very likely the
last birth, I thought, man, I'mnot going to get that lucky
again and have like a nurseready and able to take photos,
and it's just, it's just sospecial and it's just a special
life experience and I would beremiss if I didn't have photos
(12:31):
or if I didn't have tangiblememories from it.
So, yeah, I reached out to youand that's how that was my job
process for photos Turned out,actually, that I had the same
nurse that took the photos frommy third pregnancy.
She was my nurse again or shewas like in the circulation of
(12:51):
nurses that I had again when Iwent into labor for the fourth
time.
So I got to see her again andwe said thank you so much for
the photos and I said we lovethem so much that I actually I
got in touch with Angela becauseI I couldn't, you know, I
couldn't bear the thought of nothaving photos.
Angela (13:07):
Oh, that's so cool, yeah , so now, what were the final
weeks and then days leading upto when your labor started?
Like for you, final days.
Theresa (13:17):
There were not a lot of tells that it was the final
days, but the final weeksleading up I was so, so heavy
and slow.
Final weeks leading up I was so, so heavy and slow and my home
is very tall and the doing thestairs with the young children,
with the bedrooms so high up,was it was a lot.
So I depend, I leaned on,leaned on Joel a lot for child
(13:38):
care because I just wasn't,wasn't mentally there and was
really hard.
I felt like my children werebecoming feral because I
couldn't really like holdboundaries or discipline when I
couldn't move.
I couldn't string together manythoughts and, yeah, it just was
slow.
But I felt good and wow, it'slike I don't even remember.
(13:59):
I just remember feeling slowand feeling like I didn't know
when the baby was going to come.
But I have gone as early as twoweeks early.
So I just went into prematurenesting mode and I just
organized and cleaned and sortedthings and rearranged kids'
rooms for optimal entertainmentafter the baby was born.
Angela (14:18):
Yeah, that's so helpful, rotating all those toys one
last time.
So how did your labor start?
Theresa (14:31):
I was going to labor overnight, always at like 2am.
I realize now because I keptnotes on each labor.
That was my previous way todocument the pregnancies and
labor.
I just kept notes like ajournal on my phone and I
realized that I always went intolabor at 2 am or around that
time and I think it was therainstorm it was raining.
With my second she was bornduring the full moon.
(14:51):
I went into labor during thefull moon and she was born
within minutes of the peak ofthe full moon.
So definitely some barometricpressures at play.
But it was raining and I wokeup and started having
contractions and I called mybest friend and I said it's
happening.
And I just said it's starting.
(15:12):
I did not have false labor inthe days leading up to real
labor, it just started.
It was kind of most peaceful,rolling contractions to start.
I feel like contractions are alot more bearable with water
intact.
So I've done it both ways and Idefinitely prefer my water
being intact.
I had the most peculiar laborthis time where I could stop my
(15:32):
labor fully just by sitting.
I could just sit and it wouldstop so I could just take a
break at any time.
It was just crazy.
I've never experienced that.
But when I get to the hospitalI had the nurses check me, check
me, and it was like a game atthat point, like how dilated am
I?
And the nurses said she'shoping for something more than
(15:57):
five.
And then she checked me and shesaid eight.
And we all celebrated, whichwas very funny and yeah, when we
got to the hospital, just we,we could very calmly discuss my
plan because I could stop mylabor at any time and just have
a nice calm conversation.
But the caveat was that theminute I stood up, I would, I
would pay for it Like I wouldexperience all the contractions
(16:18):
with full force that I didn'thave while I was sitting.
Angela (16:22):
Yeah, and that's really interesting because you ended up
birthing upright.
So would you share a little bitabout your thoughts on the
birth sling?
Theresa (16:31):
I loved that sling and then everyone who came into
contact with it loved it too.
The midwives were like, how dowe get one for the office?
Like how do we get one of these?
I loved the birth swing.
I feel like the birth swingyeah, I was, I was upright, but
I think I was like bent overmost of the time until I finally
started pushing on the stool.
But I started pushing on thestool because my legs were
(16:54):
giving out, because I had tostay standing in order to have
like have like fruitfulcontractions.
I had to stay standing and Ithink that I started having
contractions at 2 am and Istarted pacing the house at like
between 4 and 6 am and then Ithink the baby was born, really
(17:16):
2 pm.
I don't quite remember.
But whenever my midwife broughtthe stool it's because I said
my leg was cramping she said,well, you've been standing for
12 hours, so I ended up birthingon the stool.
But I love the swing.
The swing it like it just is aninstrument to help you, help
your own body.
(17:36):
It's like giving you so muchlike input or like that's not
the word I'm looking for, um, Idon't know.
I feel like it just gives youinformation on your body Like,
oh, like I can read, I can kindof redirect, like something is
holding like me up so I canredirect my strength to like my
(17:57):
arms, or I can redirect mystrength to my legs because like
my upper body is beingsupported or like I can lean
back so I can alleviate, likeholding myself up like, and like
my back body is supported so Ican more engage my front body.
I really really like the swing.
I mean the thing that Iappreciate most about like going
(18:19):
a midwife route is like justlike the freedom to move, and
that's what I like most aboutnatural labor is just the
freedom to move and I I feellike the birth swing is just
like the ultimate aid in thatprocess.
Angela (18:35):
Yeah, your midwife followed you and yeah, you were
kind of hanging out in the birthsling by the door.
She just, yeah, let you claimthat power, like.
What was that like for you?
Theresa (18:47):
It was wonderful.
I feel like like there's justso much like respect given and
like through that practice andthe nurses and the hospital
there, and I um trying to thinkback, if I have.
Oh, yeah, I was.
I was in the bed all threetimes, except except this time,
and I didn't know up from down,but after looking at the photos
(19:08):
I realized my midwife was justcrouched on the ground under me
where all the action was,because she just followed me
where I was and yeah, I justknew.
I just knew that's where Ineeded to be.
Angela (19:19):
Yeah, that intuitive movement, yes, for sure.
So how was your immediatepostpartum time?
Theresa (19:33):
immediate postpartum time.
I remember it's being veryintense because I was, I was
sitting and I was just kind ofall exposed and I was shaking
all over and, I think, maybe alittle cold too after um, after
exerting that much, and I thinkthat it was my second hardest
labor.
For sure.
The two labors before then werenot as intense and I remember
(19:54):
not having to work very hard thelast two labors, but this one
was a lot of work.
I pushed for 10 minutes, whichfor my previous two births I
only pushed one time.
But this time I pushed about 10minutes and I think that I
could have had more contractionsbut I just wanted to be
finished, so I pushed myselfover the edge and so then
(20:18):
postpartum, I felt all the aftereffects of that and I think the
moments after birth are alwaysvery intense.
This one was was pretty intenseand I was shaking and I think
that, like the, the, theheightened emotion was built
upon by my mother coming in likejust minutes after birth and
(20:40):
she was so like it's such, such,I don't know such shock and
exuberance and she was so happyand kind of shocked and she's
very empathetic, so I think itwas a lot for her to see me
immediately post-birth andshaking, but I think it's better
(21:00):
that way that she didn't see mein the throes of birth.
I think that maybe it would havebeen too intense for her and
then too intense for me to seemy mother so worried.
But she came in afterwards andshe was still worried, but she
was also happy and very relievedand she had been roaming the
halls.
She didn't know how to getinside the birthplace.
(21:24):
She had been roaming the hallsso I think she was very relieved
to have found me and yeah, butI think that it was wonderful.
I was just.
I was just sitting and holdingmy baby and my mother was
holding me and it was wonderful.
It's a lot nicer than being ina hospital bed.
Angela (21:41):
Yeah, that was so, so sweet.
Was there tearing, I didn'ttear.
Theresa (21:48):
I didn't tear and my recovery was great.
I think I felt a little moresore just because of the.
For me it was extra pushing.
I felt a bit sore, like Ihadn't felt sore in a while or
like I did not feel sore with mythird.
She had a very small andcooperative head.
(22:08):
She had a very small andcooperative head.
She's just such a cooperativebirth.
But this time I felt a bit sorebut otherwise I felt great.
I felt great.
It was my smallest time betweenbirths, so I feel like my body
just knew what to do.
I hadn't been that long sinceit had been in that condition
previously and, yeah, I great.
(22:30):
I probably did a lot of thingsthat would not be recommended
for a postpartum woman to do,like install running boards on a
car.
I did that because I didn'treceive.
I didn't get a new vehicleuntil four days postpartum, so I
moved all the car seats bymyself and it's a higher car, so
(22:52):
I purchased and installedrunning boards myself.
I thought it would be a funpostpartum project.
Angela (22:58):
Wow, how are you feeling after that?
Theresa (23:01):
It felt good to move my body.
I feel like sometimes sorenessis compounded if you kind of
baby that spot, whereas if youget freshly oxygenated blood in
those areas, like, I think it'sgood.
I think it's good to move.
Angela (23:14):
So I think, had you mentioned, your mom was making
you some special soups that werelike family recipes for your
postpartum.
Theresa (23:23):
Yes, there's quite a strict postpartum regimen that
the Chinese follow.
One is just being warm andbeing kept warm and having warm
soups and nourishing broths.
There is a soup that not a soupbut like a stew that is made
and it's supposed to sit and itis made of trotters, which are
(23:46):
pig's feet, and ginger and hardboiled eggs and lots of brown
sugar and dark soy sauce whichis kind of like a caramelized,
like soy sauce.
So it's just very dark, darksoup and I think it's honestly
supposed to mimic visually mimicafterbirth, like it's very dark
(24:09):
and like you know, it kind oflooks bloody.
It's like very, very dark brownand the idea is that once
you're no longer bleeding orpassing clots, the soup is
supposed to be eaten then andbecause trotters or pig feet
have so much like fat andcollagen, it's supposed to
(24:31):
replenish what you lost.
Mama, can you tell more aboutthe soup?
What soup Go to girl, my girl,paul, here's the expert.
Hi this is my mother, hannah.
Anna (24:50):
After she born the baby.
And then our traditions needsome ginger ginger root.
You make the soup with chickenwith some like the pork feet,
because the skin have somecollagen and then the help her
(25:16):
Ginger is to push the air out.
That's our tradition thing.
We put some like dry mushrooms,because that's a natural
mushrooms Like a root Clean yourinside black, inside the areas
black, push out.
(25:39):
Just like if in hospital afterbaby born they push your stomach
like a push like the black out.
But my, our stuff you eat after, eat after it, help you push
that stuff out, clean inside thesystem.
And then the they give morelike um, protect your body
(26:02):
because you lose a lot of blood,a lot of energy, ginger, just
just all our, don't matter whatage, even though now you every
day have like a three-piece feshginger you're chewing every day
.
That's clean your system topush the bad out, the air out,
(26:23):
and then you don't have a lot ofair in your stomach.
Then you never have like astomach hurts, heartburn or
something.
We don't have that kind ofproblems.
And then never have like astomach hurts, half one or
something, we don't have thatkind of problems.
And then we have like somemushrooms that all like um,
because the um or herbs like akind of dry vegetables after
(26:46):
we're soaking stuff and puttogether with the chicken or
wine.
We put a little rice wine too.
But beginning we don't put thatmuch because you need to give
birth for the baby Ginger isgood Ginger and then just make
the soup more like a calcium,something inside, help the new
(27:11):
mother get more energy back andthen other things after 15 days
later, because the blood alreadystopped Before she have, we
think about have one more onemonth or one and a half months
the baby be born.
We already started to cook somevery special things like
(27:36):
vinegar, pork feet and some.
The vinegar is not like asupermarket vinegar.
That vinegar at least theirnatural, natural vinegar, soaked
for long times we call it blackvinegar or mature vinegar.
Theresa (28:00):
Or rice and rice and herbs and it is actually
delicious vinegar.
If you ever like, you can getit into in an Asian market, not
a regular grocery store.
But black vinegar is veryaromatic and it's actually
delicious addition to Asianfoods, like anything that's very
(28:23):
fatty yeah, it's a fatty, oranything that's very fatty.
The mature vinegar is a greatcomplement to fatty foods For a
lot of ginger.
Anna (28:33):
We peel the skin, the ginger skin, and then we use the
wok to stir-fry.
Let them dry and then put thevinegar together, cook for like
one hour and then let them cooland then every week just keep it
.
Don't let it get mold orsomething, kill the drain.
(28:55):
Every week just reheat, reheat,let them burn.
After the baby born 15 days, wejust put a hot feed egg all
together, put inside the gingerand vinegar stuff, then you cook
together, put inside the gingerand vinegar stuff, then you
cooked every day.
Just give a little bit for thefor the mother to eat.
(29:17):
And what's that for mama?
What is that?
For the same thing, just likepush the bacteria out and no
more blood in your stomach, inyour earrings, because why the
woman like a other.
Later they have a earrings,have problems, have a cyst,
(29:38):
something.
But our traditions, or clean upafter you born the baby, clean
up everything the bad bacteria.
Theresa (29:46):
So mom would you say there's a?
There's a soup that you eatright after the baby is born.
Then after you stop bleeding,there's a different soup.
Yeah, both are for pushing outbacteria and cleaning out your
arteries.
Yes, to prevent healthcomplications later in life.
Anna (30:05):
Just don't leave any black breathing inside, just clean up
all the system, my system, veryclean.
And then when your next parents, parents the parent of the baby
, not any something inside thebad material, just clean.
I think our traditions like,because we have 5,000 history, a
(30:32):
lot of good things, they keepit.
The generation past generation,that's my.
I remember when I have her andmy son, my mom already told me
to do this and then my mom saiddoes her mother teach her to do
that?
That's all generation bygeneration.
(30:52):
In China, after the baby born weare very careful, like a big
hat, don't let them get a wing,because they say if too cold, it
gets sick.
Because you on that time youare very your immune system is
not that strong like before,easy to get sick, so we don't go
out.
But you know it's not thatstrong like before.
It's easy to get sick, so wedon't go out.
(31:12):
But before it's not very clean,they don't know how to keep
yourself, protect yourself.
But in our country we never letpeople wash hands right away
because they say after the babyis born, the whole body, the uh
(31:34):
course, I bought him a horse,yeah, the painful disability, uh
, painful disciple.
So whole body, the pave allopen.
Yeah, easy to get any uhdisease, any cold, because
you're very tired, not energy tofight with any disease, any
drink.
So we're very protective forthe mother just born the baby.
(31:59):
We don't let other people comein the house, just one or two,
but they make sure they clean.
So in other cases.
To hold the baby, even to givethe woman to the mother to eat
all the stuff.
Use the hot water.
Born to stop no drink.
Make sure, even though longtime ago they don't have like
now they already know to cookall the stuff hot water.
(32:22):
They don't have alcohol, theyjust use that kind of uh the to
to try to kill all the germs,protect the new mother.
I think it's good because Ifeel, even though now next year
I'm 70 years old, I'm okay.
Theresa (32:39):
One thing you said those leg injections, those
anti-inflammatory drugs, canmake you have less wrinkles she
says that the collagen in thepig, in the pig's feet, are um,
will prevent wrinkles too oh,good thing, yeah, we.
Anna (32:59):
We eat a lot of pig feet, skin or something, not, not the
fat things.
Theresa (33:03):
We take the fat things out, just eat the uh so yeah,
once the fat is rendered out ofthe skin and the collagen, that
is what is ingested.
Um, so it's less like eatingthe fat and, rendered out of the
skin and the collagen, that iswhat is ingested.
So it's less like eating thefat and more.
Anna (33:15):
I'm okay, huh, I don't have that much wrinkle, oh my
gosh, you look great that isamazing my mom.
Even though my mom she passedaway on 80 years old.
She still walk.
Just take a bus, come to Maineto visit her when she have her
first baby, but have friendscome together with her.
(33:37):
But she walk very well and thenshe skis very good too.
Oh, wow, I think that thistradition is a help.
I don't have a, I don't do alot of research, but they just
from the all the family for thetradition help.
I don't have a, I don't do alot of research, but they just
from all the family for thetradition.
We all eat like this.
I push her, don't let her goout, put her hair on something,
(34:01):
but she listens good, I justdon't want to when her get older
and get problems someday.
Some people like a shrink thehair like this, don't know they.
They say, because you don't puta lot of after baby born to put
a lot of calcium to, to, uh,refill your system, I don't know
(34:23):
, I'm, I'm okay yeah, that'samazing.
Angela (34:26):
Thank you so much for sharing all of that.
Anna (34:28):
I really very nice talk to you and then if we need
something, I can help, we share.
We're all women.
Theresa (34:37):
I have one Chinese friend.
Growing up in Maine it's notvery common to have a Chinese
community but I did.
I have one Chinese friend andshe is a similar age to me and I
remember the first time that Ihad one Chinese friend and she
is a similar age to me and Iremember the first time that I
had a child.
She said she's she's, um, she'sa chef, so she knows all about
(34:59):
like cultural foods.
And she said that she consultedher mother on how to make the
soup for me, like the postpartumsoup with the trotters and the
vinegar and the ginger.
And her mother said well, youcan't take her mother's
(35:24):
privilege away to make her thesoup.
So I think it is very heavilycultural that there's a whole
routine and community and ritualinvolved in caring for the
mother postpartum.
I think that's quite beautiful.
Angela (35:38):
Yeah, it really is, and it's so important and I love
hearing about all of that.
Theresa (35:44):
That's very cool about the soup that I didn't know
until this time around is that Ihate ginger.
I am a chef and I am Chineseand I hate ginger.
I don't like eating it.
I like the flavor Ginger tea,great.
I just hate eating ginger.
So my mother had to force me toeat bits of this soup Because
(36:06):
you're supposed to drink thebroth but you're also supposed
to eat the solids, but I hateginger.
And she like cause you'resupposed to drink the broth but
you're also supposed to eat, eatthe solids, but I hate ginger.
And she said she said eat it,try it.
And I said oh, I hate ginger.
And then she took a bite of itand she said oh, this ginger is
very mild.
And she so the ginger issupposed to be indicative of the
child's temperament and my son,my, my fourth born son, is he's
(36:31):
very sweet and mild.
I don't know if he'll stay thatway, but he's incredibly sweet.
He's just happy and he laysthere and he watches and he
observes and he tracks and hesmiles and he laughs and if he's
hungry he'll just complain alittle and if he's tired he'll
just complain a little.
And anyway, she said that hisginger is is very mild and she
(36:53):
said that my ginger was bitterlyspicy.
Angela (36:59):
Oh my gosh.
Theresa (37:00):
She seems to think that I'm the most difficult child
that ever existed.
So she said that your gingerwas so spicy.
Angela (37:07):
Oh my gosh, that's really interesting as, as a
final question, if you were togive advice to someone who's
expecting, or even new parents,what would be the biggest thing
you'd want to share?
I?
Theresa (37:21):
would say that this applies to kind of all stages of
life, but when you're in alife-changing stage of life,
that it always pays to have awarrior mentality versus a
fear-based mentality.
Because it's very easy to befearful of the stages of
pregnancy.
It's very it's kind of almosteasy to be fearful of the
(37:43):
outcome and it's you know, youcan be fearful of labor, you can
be fearful of new, newborn hood.
You can be fearful of having atoddler.
You can be fearful of having atoddler, you can be fearful of
having a teenager.
There's just so many things tobe fearful of and have that kind
of mentality.
But it doesn't pay like to dosome more.
You know to, to push through andhave a warrior mentality where,
yes, we will tackle that.
(38:04):
Like, yes, this will pass, thiswon't last forever, we can get
through this.
I think that there's always abenefit to that.
It was when I took a birthingclass.
They said do not get in thefear loop.
When you start contractions,Don't fear the next contraction,
because you're not going to beable to ride it if you're
(38:25):
fearful even before it starts.
And they just said you know,just know we'll end and have a
warrior mentality and I I thinkthat's just very, very important
, because if you have a can-domentality, it will serve you
better than having a fearful orhesitant mentality.
Angela (38:46):
Yeah, definitely.
I agree with that.
So much it's.
Yeah, just having that mindsetshift can make all the
difference.
Yes, can I ask you how you feltwhen you saw the photos after
your birth?
Theresa (39:00):
Oh, I just thought they were so beautiful and it was so
nice to to see it from adifferent vantage point.
I just to have the experiencein your head is is just not
enough.
It's so monumentous.
I think, just to see it from adifferent point of view, like I
think in one of the photos thatyou took it was my favorite one
I'm just hunched over the babyand it's just me holding the
(39:21):
baby and that's all I see.
And I see my midwife sitting onthe floor smiling at me and my
best friend is behind me andshe's got her arms up in victory
.
And you know, that wasn't myexperience and it's nice to see
that, holistically, this was theshared experience and I just I
loved them and I'm soappreciative and thankful that
(39:43):
you did that for me.
Thank you.
Angela (39:47):
Oh my gosh.
Well, you're welcome.
It was my honor.
All of the births that I attendare really just such an honor
to to witness you know, youclaiming your power and birthing
your baby.
It's so magical, so thank youfor letting me witness.
Um, yeah, it was such an honorchatting with you today, teresa,
(40:07):
and hearing hearing your shareyour story.
Thanks for taking the time tochat with me and come on today.
Theresa (40:14):
Thank you so much I'm glad my mom was here too.
Angela (40:17):
Me too.
Before you go, I just want toremind you I have a ton of
resources for pregnancy andbirth.
If you're pregnant, whetheryou're a first time mom or if
this is your fifth baby, I wantyou to check out the show notes,
because I have some freetrainings and free downloads
that you can sign up for, aswell as the link to access my
(40:37):
labor of love, a comprehensive,self-paced online childbirth
education course.
I created this coursespecifically for moms who don't
want to be told what to do,regardless of where you're
birthing or who you're birthingwith, and I'd honestly love to
teach you everything that I knowso that you can prepare for an
(40:58):
autonomous birth experience andprepare to step into your role
as the leader of your birthjourney.
So click to the show notes,check out all of those links and
, if you ever have any questions, feel free to DM me at my main
birth over on Instagram.
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