128. MyMaine Birth: A Home Birth with Transfer to Mayo in Dover-Foxcroft, then a 7 year Fertility Journey, followed by a Redemptive Home Birth - Megan's Story

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Are you a soon to be mom, a seasoned mother, or simply interested in the world of birth?  You’re in the right place! 

In this episode, we discuss:

• Home birth in Maine
• Navigating a transfer to the hospital from a planned home birth and a beautiful example of the way midwives and hospital doctor's can  work together.  
• Midwifery care and doula support
• The challenges of a long and difficult fertility journey 
• ….and a whole lot more!

Additional Resources you’ll LOVE…

If you are ready to prepare for an autonomous birth experience, where you’re respected as the authority over your body and your baby…  regardless of where you plan on birthing -
CLICK HERE for 10% off  the MyAutonomous Birth self-paced, online course! 

Not sure where to start?  I’ve got you covered!  Check out my FREE resource, 37 Questions to Ask Your Care Provider.   Whether you’re interviewing new providers or have already established care, this FREE resource offers guidance on important topics to discuss with your provider. 

Episode Transcript

Megan (00:00):
So he started filling the tub pretty much right away,
because I think we both kind ofjust knew Interestingly, like I
don't think we ever reallytalked about it I didn't say
like oh, this is you know.
I think I in my head was like Ithink this is going to happen
pretty quick, and I guess he hadthe same idea, because he
started filling up the tubalready and I just trying to

(00:20):
distract myself, I guess decidedto set up a charcuterie board
for my midwives and people whowere coming to my birth.
So I started cutting up fruitsand veggies and putting out
crackers and all the things, andevery once in a while Gabe
would look at me and he'd belike don't you think you should
be sitting down or resting orwhatever.
And I was like no, no, I'm fineand I'm like gripping the
counter, being like okay, sorry,you know, but it was really

(00:41):
nice because it was just, it wascalm and quiet, it was just us.
The other thing was that my, myson, wanted to be there for the
birth as well.
So we didn't wake him ourselves, but he woke up by hearing me,
I guess, being in labor, and hewoke up and I just heard him
from the other room and he goesmom, are you having the baby yet
?
And I was like I think so, andhe was like, okay, so he, he

(01:04):
bounded out of his room.
He was very excited, he wasready to witness that.
And then it did happen veryquickly, which was, which was
very nice.
So my sister arrived around six,30, um, right before she came,
probably around six or so, gabewas like we should probably let
Cindy know.
Maybe she won't come right away, maybe she will, but we'll just

(01:26):
let her know so that she canwake up, prep, do all the things
.
And I was like all right, youknow, let's, let's do that.
So we called her she.
She listened to me for probably30 seconds to a minute and she
was like I and I was like youknow, just, you don't have to
come right now, you can justwait, don't worry about it, it's
fine.
And she was like I think I'mgoing to come.

(01:46):
And I was like, oh, okay, youknow, like whatever.
And, interestingly enough, themidwife assistant who the
midwife in training, I shouldsay, isa um had told me right
when I got in with them andbecame a client with them that
she was going to be away forfour days, do not have your baby
between May 28th and June 1stor whatever the case may be.

(02:10):
And this was May 30th.
So she was like I'm not goingto be there.
And I knew she wasn't going tobe there.
So I assumed that a differentmidwife, anna McGuire, was going
to come and assist Cindy.
But who shows up to my house?
But Nicole.
So this, yeah, nicole, who Iwas actually like really hoping

(02:33):
would be able to be there.
I hadn't seen her throughout myentire pregnancy.
Nicole shows up and I was like,oh, my goodness, you came out
of retirement for my baby, what?
And I guess Anna had beencalled to a different birth that
day, so she wasn't able to bethere for Cindy.
So Nicole came, which was sospecial because she was there
for my first and I, like I saidI I love, love Nicole and her,

(02:56):
her style of of care, so thatwas really sweet.
So she showed up, probablyaround eight or something,
probably 738 or something, and Iwas already in the pool at that
point.
Gabe had convinced me to stopwith my charcuterie before I get
in the pool.
So I got in the pool and, yeah,things picked up pretty

(03:19):
speedily, I feel like.

Angela (03:22):
I'm Angela and I'm a certified birth photographer,
experienced doula, childbirtheducator and your host here on
the my Maine Birth podcast.
This is a space where we sharethe real life stories of
families and their unique birthexperiences in the beautiful
state of Maine, from our state'sbiggest hospitals to birth
center births and home births.

(03:43):
Every birth story deserves tobe heard and celebrated.
Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply
interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you.
Welcome back.
You're listening to episode 128of my Main Birth.
As a reminder, nothing in thisspace is censored.

(04:06):
I share all different types ofstories that are submitted to me
.
You might hear hospital birthstories, birth center stories,
all different types of homebirth stories.
These could all be eitherpositive, negative or anything
in between.
The only requirement forsharing a birth story on the
podcast is that at least one ofyour birth stories is a Maine

(04:27):
birth story.
As an added bonus, all of mypodcast guests receive a gift
certificate for a familyadventure photo session on the
session day of your choice.
I host session days for mypodcast guests at iconic
locations across Mainethroughout the spring, summer
and fall.
So if you're interested injoining the community of Maine
moms sharing birth stories onthe podcast.

(04:49):
You can fill out the form overon my website, mymainbirthcom,
or you can always send me amessage over on Instagram at
mymainbirth.
Today's birth story guest isMegan, and she is here to share
her two Maine birth stories withus.
Her first was a planned homebirth turned hospital transfer
to Mayo in Dover, foxcroft,followed by an almost seven-year

(05:12):
fertility journey leading up tothe pregnancy and birth of her
second son, who was born at homejust a few months ago.
All right, hi, megan, welcometo my Maine Birth.
Good morning, hey, hey.
So to get started, would youshare a little bit about you and
your family Of course, yeah.

Megan (05:33):
So my husband, Gabe, and I have been married for just
over nine years and we live in avery small town in Maine and we
have a very wild and sweetlittle boy, Nathan.
He's eight.
And then we just recently hadanother little boy joining our

(05:54):
family and so now we have athree month old today.
So, yeah, two little boys andwe are just kind of live the
rural farm life here We've got,you know, we've got some animals
and try and keep life simple iskind of how we rural farm life
here We've got, you know, we'vegot some animals and try and
keep life simple is kind of howwe try and do it.

Angela (06:09):
But yeah, the way life should be for sure, exactly,
yeah, the main way.
I love it, so yeah.
So now jumping into your birthstories, would you share about
how you found out you werepregnant for the first time and
what your thoughts were inchoosing your care?

Megan (06:26):
Yeah.
So when I found out I waspregnant with Nathan, we had
only been married, I think,about five months at the time
and we were good with that.
We were excited to start ourfamily.
So that was it was, I say,unexpected, although probably
shouldn't have been quite asunexpected as it was.
But I had PCOS and have hadPCOS since I was a teenager.

(06:51):
So we were kind of unsure ofhow pregnancy would go, how if I
would be able to conceive welland my cycles had been really
all over the place for monthsfor the few months that we had
been married, all over the placefor months, for the few months
that we had been married.
So I really had no thought thatI might have been pregnant.
When I actually tested to findout and so I was I was very

(07:11):
shocked to find out that I waspregnant that soon, with having
PCOS and everything like that,and kind of eventually gave me
the false idea that pregnancywould just come easily to me
because I had gotten pregnant soquickly the first time.
But we were very, very excitedand my mother had done four out

(07:32):
of five home births.
I was her first baby born athome and watched my baby brother
be born at home.
I think I was five at the timeand it was always something that
really interested me.
I ended up, kind of I ended upworking on a farm later in life
and helped a lot of animalsdeliver, and it was always just
something that fascinated mebirth and so when it came time

(07:56):
for me it wasn't even really toomuch of a question.
My husband was a hundredpercent on board with having a
home birth.
So we we went with a midwifethat had previously delivered my
sister's babies and so we knewher, we knew her family and felt
comfortable with her.
We didn't like interview a lotof midwives, we just were like
here, you know, we know you,we're comfortable with you and

(08:18):
we just we hired her immediately.
So it was a prettystraightforward.
There wasn't a lot of back andforth on it for us, which was
nice.
Do you care to share who?
It was a pretty straightforward.
There wasn't a lot of back andforth on it for us, which was
nice.
Do you care to share who?
It was?
Yeah, so we use Cindy O'Donnell.
She's based out of Parkman.
She has since really sloweddown in her practice as she's
getting older she's semi, semiretired now but so I used her

(08:41):
and her daughter Nicole, who'snow Nicole Johnston.
But so I used her and herdaughter Nicole, who's now
Nicole Johnston, and she kind ofacted as my doula at the time.
So, yeah, we had both of themwith us.

Angela (08:52):
Oh fun, so were you born in Maine?

Megan (08:56):
also, I was.
I was literally born in theexact town that I currently live
in.
Yeah, I'm like I was born in ahouse like two miles away from
where I live now.
So did your mom have Cindy alsoas her midwife?
No, no, she used.
I believe her name was NancyO'Neill and I believe she is in
a different state now.
I'm not sure where she is, butused to live here and now she's

(09:19):
been out of state for many, many, many years.
But yeah, so she used her.

Angela (09:24):
Oh, wow, interesting.
And so your sisters use Cindy,so you decided to go with her.
Yes, and so how was yourpregnancy looking, as things?

Megan (09:35):
sort of progressed.
For you it was.
So I'm just so thankful, I feelso blessed.
I've had fairly easypregnancies in terms of, you
know, no morning sickness,really I have not.
I never had any severe symptomsthat that made it.
So I was like, oh, pregnancy ismiserable.
I was, I was, I worked at afarm, like I was saying, and I

(09:58):
worked throughout the whole ninemonths that I was pregnant with
my first son, milking cowstwice a day, and I was really
active.
So I would say it was fairlyeasy.
We were very, very excited.
We didn't find out the genderof our first baby, so we had
that, as we were, like you know,nearing the end, the

(10:18):
anticipation of that.
I was very, very confident andvery confident in what I could
do physically, which I think wasgood.
But as we'll get into the birth, you'll notice I was not very
confident, like mentally andemotionally, as as I led up to
delivery of my first baby.

Angela (10:37):
So so how are your appointments looking like and
what was your experience withlike the home birth midwifery
care here in Maine looking like?

Megan (10:45):
and what was your experience with, like the home
birth midwifery care here inMaine?
Yeah, cindy does.
She doesn't do like in-homeappointments for the beginning
stages.
So you go to her, so I would.
I would go to her house and dothose.
I loved I just loved howin-depth and lengthy they could
go.
It's basically more likechatting with a friend, you know
, than sitting down at an officeor something like that, you

(11:08):
know, it's just you sit on hercouch, you drink some tea and
and chat about birth and yourfears and your concerns or
whatever the case may be.
And I mean I loved that the theappointment times could vary, I
mean, from, you know, 45minutes to two to three hours if
needed.
It was really.
It was very kind of made youfeel like you were her only

(11:29):
patient, even though you weren't, you know, so very personable.
I felt like I was safe.
I knew that she knew what shewas doing.
I never had a concern that, youknow, something could go wrong
that she wouldn't be able tohelp help with.

Angela (11:46):
So yeah, very felt, very safe, very seen.
I love that style and thecommunity around that.
Yeah, it really is a wholedifferent experience than your
like 10 to 15 minute OBappointment when, like most of
the hour and a half that you'rethere is spent in the waiting
room, for sure.

Megan (12:02):
For sure.
I mean I've.
I've been to to help treat myPCOS.
I've been to see like a typicalOB to talk about those kinds of
things it was.
I mean it's just night and daydifference.
I mean honestly yeah.

Angela (12:16):
So yeah, what were your last final weeks and then days
leading up to when your laborstarted looking like for you?

Megan (12:28):
leading up to when your labor started looking like for
you.
I was huge, I had.
I also did have.
I had a little bit of extrafluid as well, so that really
made me pop.
It was July, so the end of July.
He was due to come on the 21stand he did eventually come on
his due date, which I think iskind of fun.
But I remember I was working onthe farm and really hot, really

(12:48):
tired.
I remember going on walks manytimes.
But I also didn't want to forcehim to come before he was ready
.
I was pretty adamant that I wasnot going to do any, take any
measures to get him here sooner.
So I was trying to be patientand wait it out.
But I remember I was.
I wasn't, I don't know, Ididn't feel super rushed about

(13:08):
it.
I was pretty happy to have himin there.
Yeah, it was good.
There was a lot of.
There were some days.

Angela (13:14):
You know just probably every every pregnant mom can
remember those days you know youhave you have those days where
you're just like I'm, I'm done,I'm, I'm ready to be done.
But yeah, I knew that he wasgoing to come when he was ready
and and he did.
Yeah, oh, my goodness.
So you had mentioned that youhad a little bit of more of a

(13:35):
struggles with the mental aspectof labor.
Did you have things that youwere thinking of, like leading
up to birth, that like fearsthat we were focusing on, or
things that were like keptcoming up for you, like before
you?

Megan (13:45):
yeah, I think the biggest thing and it wasn't wasn't even
necessarily completely about memy parents were going through a
divorce at the time and thatwas really hard for me.
They had been married for like25 years, so of course, my, my
entire life, and knowing thatthat was coming and they were
kind of in the middle of that,but not, but not really, I I

(14:08):
ended up kind of, I guess,hoping, thinking that I could,
that I could kind of bond themover their grandchild coming and
I invited them both to comeinto my birth space to witness
the birth.
And I think that the thought ofthe thought of that and I think,
just knowing I really thoughtthat I would feel like a failure

(14:32):
having if I had to transfer orif my birth didn't go how I
intended.
I I've always been physicallystrong and so I didn't want the
people in my birth space to seeme as as weak.
So I think my the mental, themental part came in when I was

(14:54):
just like this cannot go wrongbecause I, I wanted I, just I I
don't, I don't really know therewas a lot that went into it
that I just I'm still trying toprocess through, I think.
But I think, yeah, none ofthose things did me any favors
when it came time to give birth,just the things going on in my,
in my outside fam, in the yeah,it all got to me at one point

(15:15):
and yeah.

Angela (15:17):
Yeah, oh, my goodness, so jumping into your labor story
then.
Yeah, how did things getstarted for you?

Megan (15:23):
Yeah, labor started the day before my due date, so on
July 20th, at like I don't know5 am, let's say, I woke up and I
was a little bit crampy andjust not feeling great.
I ended up getting up because Icouldn't sleep walking around.
I knew my husband would begetting up for work soon, so I

(15:44):
was like, oh, I'm just going tolet him sleep and if things
peter out, then great, and ifnot, then he'll need his sleep
too, whatever.
So, walking around the house bymyself for a while, which was
nice, I remember talking to thebaby and just trying to get
those last moments of pregnancyand soak that last little bit in
.
But eventually I did realizethat it was, it was likely time.

(16:07):
And a couple hours later I wokehim up and my husband was.
I was like, oh, we'll just wait, we won't call the midwife
right away.
I mean, first baby is bound totake a while.
And he had been up for about 20minutes and was like we're
going to call her, we're, we'regoing to call her.
And I was like but he did, hewanted to call her, he felt more
.
So we called her and she alsowas like oh, you know, she

(16:30):
listened to me.
She talked to me and she waslike, well, I'm just going to,
you know, run home and do thisand that, and then I'll, I'll,
I'll, make my way over there.
And I think she noticed how myhusband sounded a little bit
like you're going to do what now.
She was like, okay, well, ifyou want, I'll just come now.
So she came, she was there.

(16:50):
I think she got there by like10 in the morning.
My mom, like I said, had gottenthere.
I decided, you know what birthis great and I still totally
believe birth is great andbeautiful but I was like let's
let everybody join.
So I had, just in the time in,in the time that I was laboring,
I had my mom, my dad, I had twosisters, my sister's boyfriend,

(17:14):
my brother stopped by with oneof his friends and my
grandmother showed up and allthose people in this space while
I was in labor, and that wastotally my idea.
My call I was like this isgoing to be fine, not
understanding the, just thequiet inner, you know, strength,

(17:35):
that you need to do this.
And so, anyways, with betweenall those people filtering out
and whatever they were, watchinga movie, at one point I
remember I came down and Ijoined them.
I was, you know, as I wasclimbing the stairs and doing
all that kind of stuff, I wouldjust stop and chat with them and
different things like that.
And then eventually I didrealize, and it did become
overwhelming for me and I wasunsure of how to go about, being

(17:59):
like, okay, I know I asked youto come here, but now I need you
to go, so I didn't, and I justwas like it'll be fine and I
just kind of pushed through thatand it took a lot.
So, because of all those thingsand just it being a first labor
and whatever else, it was long.
I labored at home for about 20hours and, honestly, the yeah,

(18:25):
like I said, the physical part Iwas prepared for, as prepared
as one can be for not havingexperienced it before.
I remember being like, allright, I can deal with this, I
can do it kind of thing.
But yes, just the other factorswere too much for me and my
midwife was was sensing that.

(18:45):
She was very good at readingthat and she recognized that
there was just too much going onwithin the, the small area that
I was in and should clearthings away a little bit.
So she started kind of kind ofgetting getting people to, to
you know leave for for littlebits at a time and different

(19:06):
things like that.
But after a time I had gotten to, I think about I think I was
about eight centimeters.
I got checked quite a few times, which I was.
I didn't, you know, I didn'tknow as much about birth as I do
now.
I I probably wouldn't, Iwouldn't do that now but I got
checked, I think three or fourtimes.

(19:26):
At one point he was posteriorand my midwife flipped him for
me, which was great because myback labor was wicked intense
and that changed the game alittle bit for me there and so
that was very helpful.
Was this nighttime?

Angela (19:43):
now, or oh, yeah, so, yeah so everybody was sleeping
over.

Megan (19:48):
Yeah, oh, everyone was staying.
They were all up pacing thepace in the house with me, my
sister, which was great, mysister, who actually was the
doula for me at my second birth.
She was cooking me food to keepmy energy levels up, which was
great, but at some point I didstop eating.
I pretty much stopped drinking,unfortunately, and was just

(20:09):
like super in the mode there.
But yeah, so around let's justsay, nine or so at night, I had
just started having a little bitof bloody show.
I had just, I mean,contractions were coming a lot
closer together.
I didn't even realize at thetime that the very that in the
morning time up until you know,probably five o'clock at night,

(20:33):
so for a good 12 hours it wasjust the very beginning parts of
labor, like I mean, I was, youknow, I, I should have probably
just rested and gone, you know,gone slow, and not been like
it's time, it's coming, becauseI was thinking he would come a
lot sooner than he did.
So, yeah, around 9 pm, thingsare getting intense, they're

(20:55):
getting real.
There's a lot of stuff going onaround me.
It's a little bit mentally noteasy to focus, and Cindy said
that she could break my watersand try to push things along.
She could see I was gettingtired and so she did.
She broke my waters around whenI was eight centimeters,
dilated, around maybe nineo'clock at night or so, and I

(21:18):
labored for a little bit longer.
I ended up, I think what we,what we figured out was I ended
up, I ended up getting reallytired and I ended up kind of
crashing blood sugar wisebecause I had stopped eating and
not drinking very well, eventhough it was encouraged very
strongly by my midwife.
I was just like no, I'm goodand I'm trying to find out

(21:38):
what's not good, and I became alittle bit lethargic, not
responsive super well, and atthat point my midwife had been
in contact with Dr Tebow, whowas the doctor at Mayo Hospital
who was going to deliver if Ineeded to transfer.
She'd been texting back andforth with her letting her know

(22:00):
what was going on and at thatpoint she talked to my husband
and was like you know, I think Iwas at nine centimeters at that
point.
She was like I think, I thinkthings would go smoother at the
hospital.
You know home birth is.
You know home birth is great.
I know she could do it, but Ithink she would.
I think it would be better forher to transfer.

(22:21):
I would feel more comfortableand my husband was 100% on board
with that.
I just remember kind of beingpicked up and loaded into the
car, and this was aroundmidnight.
At that point, give or take,and you know, so it had been
like 19, 20 hours at home, andso we loaded up into the car and

(22:42):
I think my mom was the only oneto come with us.
My sisters at that point wenthome.
My dad oh, my dad, I believedid come, but he of course
stayed in the waiting room atthe hospital.
So there was that.
But yeah, so we get to thehospital.
Dr Thibault meets us there.
She was amazing.
She literally was on vacationat the time.
She came to the hospital fromher vacation just to deliver my

(23:06):
baby.
She's so sweet, I love her andI get there, of course, still,
like you know, active, activelabor.
She was coming to talk to meand I couldn't even talk back to
her.
I was like get this baby out ofme.
Anyways, basically, dr Devolooked as soon as I got there
and she's like your 10centimeters push, and they

(23:42):
brought me some apple juice.
I took a few sips of applejuice and I immediately felt a
million times better and Istarted pushing and two and a
half long hours later, two and ahalf long hours later, he was
born and, yeah, I did tear, Itore a little bit, got some
stitches.
All in all, when I look backI'm like, oh, it seems like it
would have been a fairly goodbirth.
There were some things that Ifeel like were, I say, traumatic
in a very loose way, slightly.

(24:02):
I, I, it went well, um,comparatively to a lot, of, a
lot of births, maybe, but itdefinitely was not the birth
that I had intended or had, youknow, mapped and planned out in
my head, which, you know, whatdoes that?
Even you know can't controlthat, obviously, but you know it

(24:24):
was just in in that setting.
You know the you have to push acertain way.
You know you're on your backand your feet are in the
stirrups and there's brightlight up there, and then you
know people are just, you knowthere's tons of people around
and they started talking about aC-section because I had pushed
for so long.
I guess there's a protocol andyou're only allowed to push for

(24:44):
so long before they startprepping things, and they were.
They were getting ready tostart prepping things and, like
I said, praise the Lord for DrThibault, because she was like
nope, baby's doing fine, she'sdoing fine, leave her alone.
But I heard that going aroundand so I was just like whoa, you
know, I'm, I'm not, I'm notgetting a C-section, I can't, I
don't want to have a C-section,and so different things like

(25:06):
that made me more nervousleading up to my second birth
because of how the first onewent.
But baby was healthy and I washealthy, and so that was a
blessing.

Angela (25:21):
Yeah, thank goodness for amazing doctors Like I know.
Dr Thiebaud is definitely oneof those amazing doctors.
You know that are there whenyou do need to transfer to the
hospital, you know, but it'sprocessing that afterwards, when
it's not your original plan, ishard.
You know, even if it went likeas good as it could have gone,

(25:41):
you know like it's still hard,Right, yeah, for sure.
So how was your postpartum time?

Megan (25:48):
I, I, I, again, I.
I think it was better than itcould.
You know, there there are a lotof stories and people who have
had it worse than I did.
So I try to not, you know, Idon't want to complain about it,
but again, just with the.
Not, you know, I don't want tocomplain about it, but again,
just with the.
Uh, you know, my parents werestill going through their thing

(26:11):
and I think they did officiallyget divorced when I was probably
about three months postpartumor so, but I never did.
I never suffered with, like,postpartum depression.
I, um, I had my postpartumblues and had my day where I ran
to my mom and set the baby inher lap and sat on the floor and

(26:31):
cried for a little while.
So that happened.
I again, I was, like I said, oneof those people.
I was like, I was confident andlike, oh, this is going to be a
breeze, essentially.
And when I found out that, hey,you know what hormones are
going to be adjusting now andyou can't control everything, it

(26:53):
kind of came as a little bit ofa shock to me that I was like,
man, I never cry.
Why am I crying?
I was, I toughed out thephysical part, which and, again,
not always a good idea I I hadactually fractured my tailbone,
I guess, during the during mydelivery, and I didn't find out
until I was about six monthspostpartum.
Because I didn't say anythingbecause I assumed you're

(27:16):
supposed to be in pain after youhave a baby.
That's pretty normal.
So I didn't really tell anybody, I just assumed that it was
fine until you know, I think Iwas about four months or so
postpartum and I realized Istill couldn't sit down directly
without feeling a lot ofdiscomfort, that I realized
probably something was a littlebit off.

(27:37):
And so there, so there was thatmy husband, I, I told my
husband, you know, go back towork.
You know, you don't have toworry about me.
You know, people have babiesall the time, like it's just a
baby, it's going to be good, yougo back to work, I'll take care
of the baby.
Um, and so he did.
I had, I had Nathan on Fridayand he was back to work on

(27:57):
Monday, and so I Iunderestimated and turned down
help that I definitely couldhave used, just from my own, you
know, stubbornness more or less, and the thinking that I could
do it and you know whatever, andlike I obviously did do it.

(28:19):
But I could have had a.
I could have had a much morerestful postpartum time, gotten
my hormones to balance a lotbetter, had I accepted some help
and rested a little bit moreand advocated for myself for
sure.
But I do remember yeah, lots ofyeah.
I was a first time mom.

(28:40):
I was definitely in thetrenches at first time like what
do I do about this and that?
And you know, having all kindsof questions but not necessarily
seeking out answers and justkind of trying to get through it
, which I now regret and realizelike I missed a lot of bonding
time, a lot of connection withmy firstborn.

Angela (29:05):
Yeah, hindsight, 2020.
And it's like you don't knowwhat.
You don't know Exactly yeah forsure.
And then you learn more and youjust do it differently next
time, and it just is what it is.
It's like those lessons.

Megan (29:18):
Yeah, exactly, oh my gosh .
Yeah, there's a it's like nightand day difference from my
first to my second, which I'm sograteful for.

Angela (29:25):
Yeah, so along those same lines, with the mental like
aspect of it and having yourbirth go like the way that it
did, when you were planning onething and then also inviting all
of those people to witness ityour thoughts after, like in

(29:47):
your postpartum of your first,like about all of the people
that you invited, and maybe inthinking of doing it again next
time, like what were yourthoughts?
Like yeah, around that aspect,yeah, I was.

Megan (29:56):
I was very defensive of it.
Honestly, I would tell anybodythat I was.
You know, I'm glad I did itthat way.
Just Just because you do itthis way, just because you have
so many people, doesn't meanthat your birth is going to go
the exact same way as mine did,you know, and to some extent I
can hold to some of that.
But it wasn't until I startedlearning more about birth.

(30:18):
I eventually started attendingbirth myself as a doula and
seeing all the different, thedifferent ways that people birth
, to the length of time that ittook, and listening to other
people's stories, um, goingthrough the classes that I went
through to to become a doula, II would have been very defensive

(30:39):
of it up until then, and atthat point I realized, um, I
realized how you know how sacredand intimate birth is and how
it's supposed to be, and hownatural it is for our bodies to
feel open and and ready to birth, and then again, how closed off

(30:59):
they can be when they're, whenthey don't feel safe and when
they don't feel ready.
And so, knowing those things, Iwas able to really talk to
myself a little bit more andrealize just how much I was not
ready and not comfortable givingbirth in the setting that I
tried to give birth in, and thatexplained a lot more to me.

Angela (31:21):
Yeah, I really think there is a huge lesson in that
experience, like as you'resharing it, the way that you are
about all of that, becausethat's definitely not something
you know, that only you did.
You know, like, a lot of peopleinvite their whole, entire
families to their birth, andit's like when you invite your
brother and your brother'sfriends are over and it's like

(31:42):
all of these people that youmaybe wouldn't feel so intimate
around, you know, in your space,like it's a it's an intimate
space.

Megan (31:51):
It is.
So I, I personally kind of holdto the fact that, yeah, you can
have people in your birthingspace, but these are the people
that you do have that connectionwith.
And if you have that connectionwith five people, then then
have those five people, but ifyou don't, don't try to force
that.
You know, like the first timethat I gave birth, I had two of

(32:13):
my sisters.
Like I said, those same twosisters were at my second birth
and it went amazingly.
I had a different connectionwith them the second time around
time around.
The first time that I gavebirth, one of my sisters was a
teenager, a pretty youngteenager, and she had not really
been around birth as much andwas very impatient for it to get

(32:35):
going.
And my other sister I justdidn't have a good relationship
with at the time, it was alittle bit up and down.
And so those same two people,two different experiences, based
on the connection that we hadhad.
You know.

Angela (32:53):
Yeah, just like walking through that experience with you
and even witnessing that andprobably themselves learning how
intimate.
The whole space is too.
Yeah, that's amazing.
So when?
What kind of led you to pursueyour doula trainings after your
first was born?

Megan (33:10):
Like I said, though watching my brother be born,
birth has just always, alwaysfascinated me.
And then having my son, thedoula who is there?
So, nicole, I felt verycomfortable with Nicole being at
my birth and I almost felt likenot entirely, but I was just

(33:30):
like, yes, my midwife is herefor me, but she's here for the
baby.
My doula is here for me.
And when I was feelingoverwhelmed and whatever she was
, she was, she never left myside honestly, and looking back
afterwards, I was like, well,that was she was, she never left
my side honestly, and lookingback afterwards I was like, well
, that was, that was amazing.
Like are there people out therewho, like I don't even know

(33:51):
that I really even knew whatdoulas were too much before that
.
And so that really strucksomething with me and my, my
siblings, all have gone on tohave multiple pregnancies and
births and I've been invitedinto some of their spaces,

(34:28):
really like a girl becoming awoman.
You know, you know it's it's,it's a birth as much for the
woman as it is for the baby.
You know it's a rebirth ofsomething and I just find it to
be so transformative and just soit's.
Just it gives me like this high, so to speak every time.
It's like it never gets old.
It's just an absolute miracleto witness.
And so when I started taking,taking some classes and reading

(34:50):
some books and doing things likethat, I I realized that that
was something that I would neverget tired of and I would just
be just absolutely honored to bea part of for for the rest of
my life.
And I had such a good circle ofwomen around me encouraging me
in that my midwife being one ofthem, and it was it was just
beautiful to kind of step intothat.

(35:11):
It is it's just so special.

Angela (35:15):
So how did you find out you were pregnant for the second
time?
What were your thoughts?

Megan (35:19):
Oh yeah, that's a that's a long story.
We started trying to haveanother baby when our oldest was
about nine months old, so thatwould have been sometime in
early 2018.
And that is when I realizedthat it was not going to be the

(35:39):
same story twice and I was notgoing to just get lucky and get
pregnant, going to just getlucky and get pregnant quickly.
So, yeah, we tried for thatwhole seven years and I never
once got pregnant.
I didn't get pregnant andmiscarry that I'm aware of.
I started tracking ovulationand I couldn't find that I was
ovulating.
Even my PCOS symptoms weregetting worse.

(36:03):
It was really hard.
It was a hard seven years.
We tried and eventually kind ofstopped trying.
I ended up caving and tryingfertility drugs, I guess
technically fertilitymedications which didn't work

(36:28):
basically fertility medicationswhich didn't work, and we're
basically told that we had apretty slim chance based on how
severe my PCOS seemed.
I went to naturopaths, I didacupuncture, I did all the
things that you know peoplewould probably tell you to try
and at some point I was like I'mdone trying.
It's really hard to try.
I was kind of just broke overit and but knew that we

(36:53):
definitely still wanted anotherbaby.
The desire never went away.
And I remember one night I, myhusband and I, we talked about
you know how we were doing withit.
Pretty frequently it impactsboth of you when you're both
going through it together.
So we talked about it and onenight we were talking about it

(37:17):
and I was like you know what Iprayed about this before.
But I was like I really wantthis revelation.
I wish I could just know, youknow like cause, if I knew I was
never going to have anotherchild, I I could be okay, I just
don't like the unknown.
Am I going to be pregnant?
Am I not always wanting to takea test to find out?
Um, kind of a thing.

(37:37):
And so I told him that night Iwas like I am just going to pray
that I have a dream and in thisdream that it will be revealed
to me if I'm going to have ababy or if I'm not, and whatever
.
And he was like that soundsgreat, go ahead, pray for that,
you know whatever.
And so I did.
And I very vividly had a dreamthat I found out I was pregnant

(38:01):
two weeks before Thanksgivingand I was telling my family and
I remember seeing a sonogram andall the different things.
And I woke up and I was likewow, you know, it was in August.
It was at the very end ofAugust of last year that I, that
I had this dream, and I wentand I called, I told all my
family and friends hey, I've hadthis dream, please be in prayer

(38:23):
for us because I'm going tostart, I'm going to start
preparing my body to to bepregnant, you know, and kind of
stepping out in faith again.
And I know I could get hurt andI know I could have just
drummed to this wacky thing justfor no good reason, but I'm
going to start preparing myselfsupplements.

(38:45):
I did not, I I've never take a,an official like prenatal.
I have tincture and I take beefsupplements, like beef organ
supplements, and that's kind ofhow I, how I prep my body for
for that, and so that's what Istarted doing.
And I found out I was pregnanton October 2nd, so just just

(39:10):
over a month later, and I wasstill shocked as crazy as it.
So because I, even though I hadbeen prepping and I had, you
know, had this expectation, theshock was still insane.
I took a test even though Ihadn't had a cycle, obviously,
in a while which I thought wasnormal, because I normally

(39:31):
didn't have normal cycles anywayI was 100% not expecting to see
that I was pregnant.
I actually I dipped it and Iset it down and before I had
even actually almost set it down, it was, it was positive, it
was very, very obvious, it was,it wasn't a faint line or
anything like that and Iliterally, I think, dropped to

(39:53):
the floor because I was soshocked, like first, first
positive pregnancy test in overseven years, and I, I don't know
, I couldn't cry, I couldn'ttalk, I couldn't.
I was just like I was.
Yeah, it was the, it was themost absolute shocking thing.
And then I was like I have totell, I have to tell Gabe of
course he's at work and so Ijust scooped up my eight year
old and I, I got him out of bedand I was like we need to go, we

(40:16):
need to go see daddy, let's go,we're going.
You know, whatever I didn't, Iwas.
I was like I have to, I have totell him.
And um, yeah, so went and foundhim, um, told him and my eight
year old guest, he knew, basedon how I was acting and I was I

(40:38):
was surprised, I was like Ididn't know you were that
intuitive that he he would haveknown.
But he, he said, before I eventold him he's like I think
you're pregnant based on howyou're acting.
And I was like really, soapparently I was.
Yeah, that's how the shock andthe excitement showed up.
It was incredibly obvious.

(41:00):
It was the most exciting,surprising day.
It was crazy.

Angela (41:05):
What an amazing story.
I love that story.
That's incredible.
And what were your thoughtslike over those next few weeks
as you were thinking aboutplanning another birth?
Like what were your thoughts inchoosing your care?

Megan (41:17):
Honestly, I was so nervous at that point.
I was pregnant after so longand I was so nervous that
something might happen to endthe pregnancy that I really
didn't even think about it forsome time.
I think it probably took acouple months before I was

(41:38):
really thoughtful about, likehow am I, you know?
It seemed more real to me atthat point, I guess, really
thoughtful about like how am I,you know?
It seemed more real to me atthat point, I guess.
And so I did eventually want tofind a midwife.
I knew I wanted to have anotherhome birth.
I was, I felt like, because ofthe knowledge and experience

(42:00):
that I had gained over the pastseven years, that it would not
that necessarily that the homebirth would be successful, but
that my birth itself would besuccessful, whether it was at
home or at a hospital.
I was more confident of that.
So I ended up going back to thesame midwife that I had used
previously.
She did my ultrasound andconfirmed my pregnancy and gave

(42:21):
me a due date, so I was due June6th.
And then, yeah, just kind ofgot back into her care, although
at the time she had anassistant who was in training
with her.
Her name is Issa, and Issa wasin training to be a midwife so
she was helping.
Nicole was on maternity leaveat the time and so I was kind of

(42:47):
bumming, I wouldn't be able tohave her.
She was there my first, like Isaid, and I absolutely loved
having her there with me, so Iwas a little bit bumming, but
Iza is an absolute sweetheartand I was just so.
It was so sweet, I was so gladthat I got to work with her for
that first part.

Angela (43:01):
So and Nicole went on to be a midwife, right Like she
was a midwife at this pointright and she went from a doula
for your first birth and thenshe went Nicole.

Megan (43:09):
Yes, nicole, I technically was not certified
yet, but she was.
She's very close Um.
So yeah, she was going to beworking as like primary.
She would have been workingprimary on it had she been there
.

Angela (43:23):
Yeah, so you had a your midwife and an amazing student
midwife.
I feel like it's so nice tocare, like even from the student
midwives, you know, becauseit's just so, it's like just
more of the same type of careright, oh, absolutely, yes, I
mean, uh, definitely she.

Megan (43:41):
You know she had questions and of course she had
someone there to help her andstuff like that.
But it's amazing howknowledgeable she was for not
even having ever.
You know, she wasn't evencertified yet but she knew so
much, Like if I had questions Icould easily go to her.
So that was really nice.

Angela (44:00):
Yeah, oh, my gosh, incredible.
So how are you feelingthroughout this pregnancy, as
things progressed?

Megan (44:06):
Yeah, this pregnancy.
The difference that I had was Iwas so anxious throughout most
of it.
In the beginning I was anxiousabout miscarrying.
I guess that actually almostdid carry on all the way
throughout.
For some reason, things wouldpop into my mind.
I would read stories Um, uh, Ifollow a lot of birth pages and

(44:29):
you know different accounts, andthings would just randomly pop
up about, uh, you know, losing,losing your baby at 30 weeks
gestation, or oh, you, you know,you get to delivery day and
then this happens or whatever,and I don't know why.
I felt like I was almost likedrawn to those stories and it
was almost like this was toogood to be true.

(44:50):
You know, like why did I get ababy after seven years?
You know like what, whathappened, different things.
I just I was just filled withanxiousness, with something I
processed through a lot with mymidwives and with my husband.
I had to really work hard to notbe filled with anxiety about

(45:13):
that particularly.
I was constantly being like, oh, do I feel the baby move?
Oh, and I did have somebleeding in the first trimester
as well, which I never had withmy first, and so I think that
really elevated that fear alittle bit more, trying to get
the bleeding under control, butholding onto that little bit of

(45:35):
excitement and hope as well.
So it was an interestingbalance trying to trying to be
excited, trying to be hopeful,um, but also, you know, I have
an eight-year-old who has beenwanting a baby, um, brother,
sister, for so long, wanting himto be excited, trying to be
hopeful, but also, you know, Ihave an eight year old who has
been wanting a baby brother,sister, for so long, wanting him
to be excited but also wantinghim to realize, like you know,
the Lord gives and the Lord cantake away, and you know we need

(45:56):
to hold this baby with openhands, knowing that, you know.
You know anything is possibleas well.
It was I was trying to protectmy own feelings is what I was
trying to do, and so the firstfew months were were a lot like
that, and then, the furtheralong I got, the more the
anxiety started to slip away andthe excitement was starting to
replace that anxiety and ingeneral, it was just, it was

(46:20):
beautiful.
It was very again, very similarto my first.
I had tiredness, that was.
That's like my main pregnancysymptom, I think, is I could nap
every single day, but no nausea, no other like debilitating
symptoms or anything like that.
So that was that's amazing.

(46:40):
I'm just so thankful for that.
And we did find out the genderof our, of our baby this time
around.
So that was exciting.
We kind of.
That was kind of my, my way oftrying to break the you know, is
this real?
Um, you know, anxiety feelingwas to be like I'm going to put
a.
Um, you know, I wanted to namemy baby and do all that.

(47:02):
So I was like I'm going to be,I'm going to find out what this
baby is, so that I can startbonding a little bit better with
him or her.
Ended up being a boy and, um, Ithink that actually did help
for me.
And, um, we weren't planning ondoing that, but we kind of
called an audible and we're likewe're going to do this to help,
you know, to help ourselves,you know, and so that was really

(47:23):
different and special too.

Angela (47:24):
So yeah, it's like there's no right or wrong way to
do it.
It's just like what's right orwrong for you and each birth you
know.
Like, what do you want in eachexperience?
So different.

Megan (47:35):
Exactly so unique, it's so fun.

Angela (47:38):
Yeah, it really is.
So how are your appointmentslooking throughout this
pregnancy with your midwife?
Were they sort of more focusedon, like your mindset and sort
of things like that?

Megan (48:06):
and even thinking about the birth, because I was so
focused on just the day to dayanxieties of each day, kind of a
thing, and they were trying tobe like, let's focus on long
term.
You know you have a baby,you're gonna have to birth this
baby.
Like we need to start preparing, you know, for that.
And so they really kept me,kept me focused on that.
So there was definitely a lotof that which was good and then
very um mine, but they weremindful of that.

(48:26):
There were times where I wouldbe like, oh, you know, I just I
don't feel baby moving as much.
And they they knew, based on myexperience, that that was
something that bothered me andworried me and they were very
good to be like, all right,let's, you know, come on in and
we're going to check on thisbaby for you, or something like
that.
I actually ended up I have aDoppler so I was able to check

(48:47):
on that every once in a whileand different things.
But it is very different, youknow, like as someone who's
who's you know worked as a doulafor others, you know it's like
you can think, I can think like,what would I say to someone who
is in my situation and I'm likeI know I would tell them this,
but I feel like this because I'mthe pregnant mom this time and

(49:07):
I'm not.
I need someone to say thesethings to me, and so they were
there to say those things to me.
Um, as well as my, my twosisters and my mom, they've all,
like I said, they've all beenaround birth and one of my
sisters has five and she hadfive births.
And my other sister is verypassionate about birth.
She has one child she had, shehad him at home, which was and

(49:28):
he was.
He was a very he's a very sweetbig baby.
He was 10 pounds seven ounceswhen he was born and she was a
rock star and had him at homeand is very passionate about
birth, very knowledgeable aboutit, and my mom, of course, has
had multiple.

Angela (49:47):
So I had so many people to lean on and turn to in that
time, which was great.
Oh, I love that.
That's so, so important to havethat community.
So how were the last finalweeks and then days leading up
to when?

Megan (50:00):
your labor started looking like for you?
Yeah, okay.
So I was due June 6th and atsome point in May, the beginning
of May hard for me to think ofan exact date, but sometime in
the beginning of May I thought Iwas in labor.
I think it was a Saturday, somy husband was home, which was
great, so he didn't have to taketime off or anything like that.

(50:22):
But I was like, oh, this is it.
You know, I was havingcontractions, although I did
tell everybody multiple times my, my sister came, my, the, the
midwife in training came overand I did tell them.
I was like, if this is labor,it seems very easy for some
reason.
And they were, like you know,but I was, I was, you know, kind

(50:46):
of vocalizing throughcontractions a little bit, you
know, it just didn't seem asintense as I would have expected
and I knew in my head, I knewthat this didn't seem real.
But my body was going through alot of the same motions and I
labored, so to speak quoteunquote labored for about 12
hours.
I got checked and I was fivecentimeters dilated, but my

(51:11):
cervix was anterior.
So it was determined thatlikely the baby wasn't actually
coming and I was justexperiencing, like you know,
false labor essentially, andeventually, like I said, 12
hours later it petered out.
I, at that point, after that wasover, I had contractions every

(51:32):
single day for the rest of mypregnancy, some that felt pretty
intense and pretty real andbaby had dropped it well into my
pelvis.
At that point his head wastilted off to the side a little
bit, so he was often a littleweird in a little weird spot and
I after that felt so done I.
I knew I wasn't going to, likeyou know I say force, force,

(51:57):
encourage him to come, but Iwanted him to come.
At that point I was veryuncomfortable and it was kind of
an exhausting two weeks.
He waited I say he waited.
He took two more weeks beforehe actually joined us and those
two weeks were pretty intensefor me.

Angela (52:21):
Yeah, I can only imagine , oh my gosh, that prodormal
labor and those toningcontractions.
Right, Get your uterus readyfor birth, exactly.

Megan (52:30):
So, yeah, I, I remember I went to my midwife.
It was my last midwife checkupbefore the baby came, which we
didn't know.
It was going to be the last one, obviously, before he came, but
it was, and it was probably,let's see, it was on a Tuesday
and I had him on Friday, so justa few days before, and I did, I
went and just sat down andcried for a little while.

(52:52):
I was like I am tired and thisbaby is, you know, it's way down
here and it's heavy.
You're always going to seven.
She just listened to me and shewas like you know, reassure me
that baby was going to come inhis, in his perfect timing and
all that, and really gave methat boost I needed to get
through the next couple of days.
But, yeah, so Friday morning Iwoke up and just similar to my

(53:19):
first round, you know, 4.00 AM,actually, I woke up around
around 3am and I was like I feela little bit off, but I didn't
think it was labor.
I was just like, wow, man, youknow I'm uncomfortable because
I'm pregnant, you know, likewhatever and was able to go back
to sleep.
So that was good.
I was like, yeah, I'm justgonna go back to sleep, went
back to sleep but then got wokenup again at 4am and went to the

(53:40):
bathroom and was starting toget crampy.
And I just knew this time, youknow, like the first time, I was
telling you like I was sayingsomething doesn't feel right.
I don't think this is, you know, it's not as intense as I would
have thought.
This time it had probably onlybeen 20 minutes of feeling off

(54:01):
and crampy and contractions andstuff, and I knew that it was it
.
I was confident, I was like,yep, there you go.
You know, um, the first time,like I said, I didn't want to
call anyone, I didn't want totell anyone.
Um, I waited hours before Itold my sister that she should
come, and this time it was aboutlike, yeah, about 20 minutes.
And I went over and woke myhusband up when I was like, yep,

(54:23):
it's time, and he was like, oh,okay, so we were kind of just,
like you know, hang out, kind oftalking about.
But I could tell things werepicking up pretty quickly and so
I told my sister to come.
She's about two hours away fromme and so I was like, well,
where I'm already about fivecentimeters dilated and baby's
really low and everything andthings seem to be coming on

(54:45):
quickly.
I would.
You know, I think she shouldprobably come.
So I think she started makingher way, probably around four,
30.
So she wouldn't have gotten tous until about six, 30 or so.
Um and I started just kind ofwalking around the house just
laboring at home with my husbandand um, that was really nice.
It was a really sweet,beautiful time.
You know, we had, we'd had thebirth pool set up from my

(55:08):
previous.
So we had the birth pool set upfor about two weeks and every
time we'd start to take it downI would feel like, oh, maybe
it's time.
You know, whatever contractionI cause, I had contractions
every day.
So it was, it was set up butnot filled up.
So he started filling the tubpretty much right away, because
I think we both kind of justknew, interestingly, like I

(55:28):
don't think we ever reallytalked about it I didn't say
like, oh, this is.
You know, I think I in my headwas like I think this is gonna
happen pretty quick, and I guesshe had the same idea, because
he started filling up the tubalready and I, just trying to
distract myself, I guess,decided to set up a charcuterie
board for my midwives and peoplewho were coming to my birth.
So I started cutting up fruitsand veggies and putting out

(55:52):
crackers and all the things, andevery once in a while, gabe
would look at me and he'd belike don't you think you should
be sitting down or resting orwhatever.
And I was like no, no, I'm fine.
And I'm like gripping thecounter, being like okay, sorry,
but it was really nice becauseit was just, it was calm and
quiet, it was just us.
The other thing was that my sonwanted to be there for the
birth as well, so we didn't wakehim ourselves, but he woke up

(56:17):
by hearing me, I guess being inlabor, and he woke up and I just
heard him from the other roomand he goes, he goes, mom, are
you, are you having the baby yet?
And I was like I think so.
And he was like okay.
So he, he bounded out of hisroom.
He was very excited, he wasready to witness that and uh and
yeah.
So that's how everythingstarted.
And then it did happen veryquickly, which was, which was

(56:42):
very nice.
So my sister arrived around 630,right before she came, probably
around six or so.
Gabe was like we shouldprobably let Cindy know.
Maybe she won't come right away, maybe she will, but we'll just
let her know so that she canwake up, prep, do all the things
.
And I was like, all right, youknow, let's, let's do that.
So we called her she, shelistened to me for probably 30

(57:04):
seconds to a minute and she waslike I and I was like you know,
just, you don't have to comeright now, you can just wait,
don't worry about it, it's fine.
And she was like I think I'mgoing to come.
And I was like, oh, okay, youknow, like whatever.
And, interestingly enough, theum, the midwife assistant, who
the midwife in training, Ishould say Isa had told me right

(57:27):
when I got in with them andbecame a client with them that
she was going to be away forfour days Do not have your baby
between May 28th and June 1st orwhatever the case may be.
And this was May 30th.
So she was like I'm not goingto be there.
And I knew she wasn't going tobe there.
So I assumed that a differentmidwife, um, anna McGuire um,

(57:53):
was going to come and assistCindy.
Um, and but who shows up to myhouse?
But Nicole.
So this.
Yeah, nicole, who I wasactually like really hoping
would would be able to be there.
I hadn't seen her throughout myentire pregnancy.
Um, nicole shows up and I waslike, oh my goodness, you came

(58:13):
out of retirement for my, for mybaby, what?
And I guess Anna had beencalled to a different birth that
day, so she wasn't able to bethere for Cindy.
So Nicole came, which was sospecial because she was there
for my first and I, like I said,I love, love Nicole and her,
her style of of care, so thatwas really sweet.

(58:34):
So she showed up, goodness,probably around eight or
something, probably 7.30, eightor something, and I was already
in the pool at that point.
Gabe had convinced me to stopwith my charcut and I was
already in the pool at thatpoint.
Gabe had convinced me to stopwith my charcuterie before I get
in the pool.
So I got in the pool and, yeah,things picked up pretty
speedily.
I feel like it was prettyintense and I, looking back now

(58:58):
I'm I'm grateful because it was.
It was faster, you know, buteverything being together was a
lot more intense.
So I kind of got to experienceboth sides, you know, but
everything being together was alot more intense.
So I kind of got to experienceboth sides, you know, long and
dragged out, but not as intensecontraction wise and then the
other way around and Idefinitely feel like I prefer
the intense for a short amountof time, but obviously it's

(59:19):
beautiful either way, but that's.
I got to experience that thistime I didn't have back labor.
This time he was not posterior,which was great I did have.
He was coming off a littlesideways.
Still he came out with his headtilted.
So I did have to do a lot ofrepositioning, a lot of, you
know, moving of the hips to tryand wiggle him down.
But I could tell I wanted it tobe a little bit more hands-off

(59:43):
this time.
I wanted to, you know, not geta million checks and, you know,
not have my waters broken for meand and it and it went
perfectly that way, which was,which was great.
So I at one point I stood upand I was shaking and so I was
like I looked around and I waslike, guys, I think I'm in
transition, I'm shaking andwhatever.

(01:00:05):
And my midwives both looked atme like yeah, we know you, we
know you're in training, we cantell.
And so I felt very hopefulabout that.
I could tell that things weremoving along and my body was
doing exactly what it wassupposed to.
Both of my sisters had arrivedat this point and we're we're
just doing things nicely andquietly in the background.

(01:00:26):
Gabe was very supportive andNathan was a little bit in and
out.
You know he um he would get alittle bit bored after a while,
but it was that's what I lovedabout it.
It wasn't like everyone wassitting there just watching me.
It wasn't like you knowwhatever.
Like my photographer came and,uh, she actually cooked my son
breakfast and entertained him,talked to him a little bit.

(01:00:47):
It was just kind of.
It was a very peaceful time.
It was beautiful.
I look back on it and it justbrings me so much joy to think
about the people that I had inmy space and how supportive and
encouraging everyone was.
Wasn't like overpowering oranything like that.
It was great.
So it wasn't.
I stayed in the pool for a bit.
After a little while I mywaters had not broken and I

(01:01:10):
think they my midwife assumedmaybe if I just got up and
walked around a little bit, thatthings would really progress
well, which I thought they andthey were.
They were I, they wereprogressing, I could have just
stayed where I was, but theywere like, yeah, if you want to
get up and walk around, you know.
And so, um, so I did, I got upand I walked over to the

(01:01:32):
bathroom, sat on the toilet,which is, of course, dilation
station you are going to feel itthere and feel it.
I did.
Um, I previous to that, though,I had started pushing, I had, I
had felt the urge to push, andagain, I didn't get checked.
I don't know if I was exactlyat 10 centimeters, but I was,

(01:01:53):
you know, pretty forcefullypushing at this point, with,
with each contraction, justthings were, things were
happening, and so I got out, andI mean every every 30 seconds I
was having a contraction that Iwas like bearing down, it was
really exhausting, obviously,after a little bit.
But so I get to the toilet andI start pushing there too, and

(01:02:13):
my water broke on the toiletwhich was perfect place, you
know, great, no mess, right.
Um.
So I was like, oh, my waterbroke, um, it was great.
I felt like I said, I felt veryin control.
Broke, Um, it was great, I feltlike I said, I felt very in
control, which was, which wasawesome.
I was able to talk through whatI was feeling, whereas my first
labor I didn't know what I wasfeeling or why, but I was able
to.

(01:02:33):
I this time I was like I feelhim, I feel him dropping.
I can tell that I'm intransition.
I can you know?
Hey, my water broke.
Things like that just made mefeel like I was in control of
how this was.
You know, to some extent I was.
I was in control of, of thisspace.

Angela (01:02:48):
You knew what was going on from all of your education
and stuff that you've learned,yeah, from being yes, yes,
exactly so.

Megan (01:02:55):
So that was great.
So, yeah, water broke and Istarted, as soon as that
happened.
I had a couple contractionsthere and then I was like I I
knew he was coming.
I kept telling everyone, I waslike I could feel the pressure,
I could feel a little bit of theburning sensation, and so I
kept saying he's coming, he'scoming, I know he's coming.
And, um, they were like yep,yep.

(01:03:17):
And so, um, my husband and myand my midwife, I believe
started helping me walk backtowards the living room, not a
very long gap between thebathroom and the living room.
But I think it took me a good20 minutes to get through that
space because I, yeah, everyevery 30 seconds I'd have a good
contraction and I'd stop andI'd push a few times and then,

(01:03:40):
you know, to take one more step.
It was just like with each stepI would stop to push.
So, anyways, we finally gotthrough that space and my
midwife and my doula were, theywere praying and they were, um,
you know, saying scripture overme and it was, it was really
nice, it was.
And then, at that point Ifinally get out there.
I realized I do not want to getback in the tub.
I I was at first okay withhaving.

(01:04:03):
I was like, yeah, I'll havethem in the in the tub.
But things just happen the waythey're supposed to happen.
And I was right outside of thetub and I realized he was coming
.
I had continually for the forthe past couple hours been
reaching down to feel to see ifI could feel him coming.
And when I reached down thattime he was probably just like
one knuckle deep in there.

(01:04:23):
So I at that point justsquatted down, basically.
So I got into like a squat, oneknee on the ground, you know,
and the other leg up, andstarted bearing down.
I was very excited for this part.
I knew that that meant the endwas in sight, you know, and I
was like I'm going to get tomeet this baby.
The end was in sight, you know,and I was like I'm going to get

(01:04:46):
to meet this baby.
So all of the I say fear Ididn't really have fear, but the
I was a little bit, you know,the last maybe hour before I
started really pushing, I waslike how much longer is this
going to last?
Because I was like, could thisgo another four or five hours, I
don't know, and it felt superintense.
So I had that little bit oflike I can't keep doing this
Although I know I could have,but that's what I was saying to

(01:05:09):
myself was like I don't know ifI can keep doing this.
So when the time came and hewas actually coming, I felt this
huge sense of relief.
You know it's going to be over.
Also when you feel that it'susually another sign that it's
exactly the second you say Ican't do this is this yeah,
that's a great sign.
I love, I love hearing that,actually, whenever I'm at birth,
I'm like can't do this anymore,I'm like, yes, it's coming, um.

(01:05:33):
So at that point, my, my soncame out.
He, he had been reading in hisroom and he came out and we
called him out and it was veryquick.
At that point, you know, fromthe time I got down there to
pushing him out was probablyfive minutes, if not three
minutes I was able to, I say,semi catch him.

(01:05:54):
My, my midwife was, was rightthere too, she, she grabbed, she
grabbed him and I grabbed him.
And it was a very redemptive,wonderful feeling.
It was just absolutely euphoric.
I felt like I was, you know,like I was dreaming.
It was, you know it's.
It's crazy how you can be likein pain and rejoicing and feel
peaceful and wonderful all atthe same time, and that's that's

(01:06:16):
the only, I guess there's noreal way to describe it.
I, I, um, yeah, I was literallyjust in, you know, just so
blissful, you know.
So my son got to witness it,which he was very thankful for,
which is so sweet, and we justgot to have our, our moment, you
know, like I, you know, broughthim right up to my chest and we

(01:06:37):
, just, we snuggled for so forso long.
You know it was, it wasbeautiful.
I, I love it.
Oh my gosh, what an amazingstory.
I love that so much.
So how was your immediatepostpartum?
Yeah, postpartum was I mean.

(01:06:57):
I loved my postpartumexperience.
This time I I was able torecognize what I wanted to do
and didn't do with my first.
So my husband had like twoweeks off of work.
He took care of how I sat andsnuggled my baby.
That was my job.
I was like this is my job.
Okay, this is my full-time job.

(01:07:18):
I really just tried toprioritize healing and rest.
I felt good, which that was mybiggest problem was I felt so
good that I was like I feel likeI could get up and go run
almost, but I knew like I wouldfeel worse later.
So I really had to talk myselfinto resting this time, whereas
before I should have wanted torest but I was talking myself

(01:07:41):
into not.
I went the complete opposite.
So I was really focusing onnursing and establishing that,
you know, the breastfeeding,connection and bond there and
just kind of getting to knowthis new little person and
trying to adjust to being afamily of four.
Obviously, there's a huge gapbetween my two boys, and so I

(01:08:02):
wanted to, you know, between mytwo boys, and so I wanted to,
you know, still be able to spendthat time with Nathan that I
had previously, and then spendthat time with Malachi as well,
and so it was very, it was verygood that my husband was
incredibly helpful.
He held down the fort for us.
We actually had Nathan came downwith a stomach bug and he he
was puk, puking.

(01:08:23):
Um, I think it.
I think I was like four dayspostpartum at that point, and so
he and my husband were liketrapped themselves out in the
living room and hunkered downwhile I hunkered down in here
hoping to try and, like you know, not catch whatever he had.
I did end up I came down withit as well.
So, um, I ended up coming downwith it for like one day or
whatever.
It was not terrible, but it was.

(01:08:43):
Yeah, it was.
It was, as you know, there weresome ups and downs to it with
the sickness and whatever else,but it was just the most
wonderful time, like I.
I just I was able to realizehow beautiful and calming and
bonding and everything, uh,postpartum season should and can
be, whereas before I had toldmyself like, oh, it's just a

(01:09:06):
messy, painful, gross time, youknow, like whatever, where you
know you feel awful and you'retired or this and whatever, but
it can be beautiful and it wasbeautiful, so there's so many
amazing lessons in both of yourstories.

Angela (01:09:23):
I feel like that are so valuable.
As a final question, if youwere to give advice to someone
who's expecting, or even newparents, what's one of the
biggest things that you'd wantto share at this point in your
journey?

Megan (01:09:45):
trust yourself.
You know you're not going to gowrong with trusting your baby
and your body to do exactly whatthey're meant to do.
You know it is beautiful and,no matter how your birth goes,
you are going to be changed forthe better and it's going to be
beautiful and you'll be able tolook back and see the beauty in
it and just really just prayabout it.

(01:10:05):
You know like God can do morethan we, than than we can even
ask or think, you know.
So really allow yourself tobelieve that and accept that and
just enjoy it.
Enjoy the whole process.
It's a miracle.
It's an absolute miracle.

Angela (01:10:21):
Yeah, it really is, and yeah, you're.
You're right, thattransformation is there in all
of the stories and all of thejourneys, however it goes, and
there's always something therefor you to learn and grow.
Absolutely, yes, yeah, well,thank you so much, megan, for
taking the time to chat with meand share your two amazing birth
stories.

Megan (01:10:41):
Oh, of course, thank you so much.
I really appreciate it.

Angela (01:10:45):
Before you go, I just want to remind you I have a ton
of resources for pregnancy andbirth.
If you're pregnant, whetheryou're a first time mom or if
this is your fifth baby, I wantyou to check out the show notes,
because I have some freetrainings and free downloads
that you can sign up for, aswell as the link to access my

(01:11:07):
labor of love, a comprehensive,self-paced online childbirth
education course.
I created this coursespecifically for moms who don't
want to be told what to do,regardless of where you're
birthing or who you're birthingwith, and I'd honestly love to
teach you everything that I knowso that you can prepare for an
autonomous birth experience andprepare to step into your role
as the leader of your birthjourney.

(01:11:28):
So click to the show notes,check out all of those links and
, if you ever have any questions, feel free to DM me at my main
birth over on Instagram.