August 29, 2024 • 55 mins
Can you imagine losing multiple family members, enduring your son's severe accident, and then your husband's sudden passing, all within two years? That’s the unimaginable reality faced by my dear friend, Sandy DeMonte. Join us as Sandy opens up about her profound and emotional journey through major life changes, sharing the strength and resilience she discovered along the way. Together, we navigate the themes of staying calm, connecting with loved ones who have passed, and finding deeper meaning behind our experiences with death.
Sandy's story takes an extraordinary turn when she recounts her son's miraculous recovery from a life-threatening accident. Guided by a spiritual intervention from her deceased brother, Sandy reveals how this near-death experience brought a beautiful vision of heaven and a renewed sense of hope. This heartwarming segment delves into the mysterious interconnectedness of life and death, showing us the body's incredible power to heal.
We also reflect on the subtle signs and synchronicities that life offers during significant moments, from Sandy's husband's intuitive actions before his passing to unexpected messages that provide comfort. These personal anecdotes highlight the deep connections we hold with our loved ones, even in their absence, and encourage us to perceive life’s challenges as opportunities for growth. Tune in to embrace the resilience of the human spirit, the importance of positive thinking, and the divine order that guides us through life's sometimes tumultuous journey.
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For personal guidance, you can reach Rebecca at:
MysticalTruths.com
rebecca@mysticaltruths.com
A big Thank You to CreativeCommons.org
Audiorezout. 14.Be Happy.mp3 for the music.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Rebecca (00:07):
Welcome to the Mystical Truths Podcast.
This is Rebecca, and I'm reallyglad you're here.
Let's unlock your world.
We all go through rough stuffand many of us have had periods
when it just keeps coming andcoming and coming.
It can be really hard to keepyour head above turbulent waters
(00:30):
and at some point, I think youfind yourself asking all of
creation why?
Li How can I make it throughthis?
But somehow we do.
There just seems to besomething within us that gets us
through another day and another, and we make it through.
I've asked a friend to talkwith me here today and share the
(00:53):
turbulent events of her lifeover the past few years or so,
and her story will not only blowyour mind but it will touch
your heart.
My guest today is Sandy DeMonte.
Hi, sandy.
Welcome to the show.
Hi, thanks for having me.
(01:14):
I'm really glad to have you andI've been thinking about this
for a while.
Sandy and I grew up in the samesmall town and we were great
friends and we really let thegood times roll in high school.
Do you remember that?
Sandy (01:22):
Oh, yes, time wer o.
Hig schoo D yo remembe tha?
Rebecca (01:25):
O y, fter graduation we , along with our friend Patty,
went to medical trainingtogether and then work and
family and life in general justgot busy and we drifted apart
and the three of us earlier thisyear reconnected and after our
little reunion I kept thinkingof how the details of Sandy's
(01:47):
world over the past few yearscould really help other people.
So before we get into yourriveting story, Sandy, I want to
make two important points here.
One is that in the top five ofmy most listened to podcast
episodes are Calming Your Mind,which is number one, Connecting
(02:11):
with the Other Side and Why WeDie the Way We Do, and we're
going to touch on each one ofthose in one way or another as
we go forward, because they'reall really important.
I mean, those are important, Ithink, to most people i Y k, ow
(02:32):
do I stay calm?
How do I get through stuff?
What about the other side?
And why do we die the way we do?
Because it's never acoincidence, it's never a
mistake.
The other point I want to makeis that it's really i often not
helpful to look backwards.
However, when we look into thepast and find the honey, it's
not only helpful but it can be aguiding light for others.
(02:55):
So that's why I'm okay with uslooking backwards and I really,
you know I can't wait to get tothe sort of mic dropping kind of
honey that you found in thefuneral home.
Sandy (03:07):
Absolutely.
Rebecca (03:09):
But we won't spoil it.
We won't get into that untilit's time.
So take us to when your happylife started to turn.
Sandy (03:15):
Well, within a matter of a span of two years, I lost my
mother unexpectedly, and then Ilost an aunt and an uncle, and
then I lost my father, and theday that we buried my father, my
(03:36):
brother passed away.
So it was.
I just felt like it just waskeeping coming.
Then my son was in an accident.
He was out of state andcrossing a street and was hit by
a car and was life flighted toa military hospital and then
(04:00):
life flighted to a trauma center.
I went down to, of course, bewith my son, and while I was
down there my husband passedaway.
So I felt like my whole worldwas just j crashing.
Rebecca (04:17):
Oh yeah, you know, and so your mom dies, some other
relatives die.
Y, ou have a big family, by theway several siblings, yes, and
some drama.
Yes, I'm sure that all familieshave.
So there's that in there aswell, and then your dad passed,
(04:40):
which created some more drama,I'm assuming right.
Sandy (04:45):
Yep absolutely.
Rebecca (04:47):
And your brother who is younger than you.
Sandy (04:49):
Yes, my little brother.
Rebecca (04:51):
W a t f.
What happened right before hepassed?
What was going on?
Sandy (04:56):
We had just left my aunt's because we had all gone
to my aunt's house for dinner.
My brother and I were extremelyclose.
He was at my house every day.
It was like I had two husbands,my brother and my husband, and
my husband and my brother wereclose too.
When I was at work, them twowould be outside waxing cars and
(05:21):
just sitting and bullshittinguntil I would get off work and
my husband would tease mybrother and call him my Miss
Daisy, because he would take mewherever I had to go.
What happened was he we had leftmy aunts and he wanted to go to
(05:42):
the casino to relax.
And he said hey, let's go downto relax for a little bit.
And I said, okay, let me gohome and grab some clothes,
because I had been staying withmy brother.
He lived with my father and Ihad been staying with him since
my father had passed.
And he was like no, I'm goingto be okay, I'm going to be fine
(06:04):
, I g t b f.
He said you go home, you getready.
He said I will call you atseven and if you don't hear from
me, you call me.
So it was seven o'clock and Icalled him and he didn't answer,
and that was very unusual and Ijust had this feeling.
(06:26):
I can't explain it to anybody.
I ran out of the house.
My son happened to be goingdown to the laundromat to do
clothes and I said I can't get ahold of Richie.
I can't get a hold of Richieand my father lived three
streets over from me, so I ranover, I opened the door and I
(06:48):
was calling for my brother andhe didn't answer and I went into
his bedroom.
He was taking a nap.
I screamed f his name and hedidn't answer and I started
doing CPR on him.
A I s d C o h.
My son, who happened to be downin the town that we live in,
(07:10):
said he got this feeling and hejust came to my dad's and he was
like I just knew something hadhappened.
Rebecca (07:28):
So, unfortunately, you know, c did not work and my
brother passed away away.
Do you think he was?
Sandy (07:30):
already passed before you got there.
When I got there, I felt likehe had not fully passed, if that
makes sense, sure, um, you know, because he still had some
color to his face.
Y k I just kept saying y k,Richie, please, you can't, you
can't do this to me, like Ican't lose you.
(07:50):
And you know I kept doing theCPR and, of course you know, the
ambulance and everybody wascoming and, to be honest with
you, that's kind of all Iremember.
I remember my son coming to meand looking at me and he was
like Mom, Richie, he's no longerwith us and that's honestly
(08:15):
that I remember.
Rebecca (08:17):
Y k, I do my best to help all of us not take life too
seriously, especially death.
However, that's a big changefor you, especially because you
were so close to him, you know,and around him so often.
So it's just something you'revery used to, and then in one
moment, that's not ever going tobe the same again.
(08:38):
R t.
I believe that they're all stillwith us and a part of our lives
, but not in that same way.
Sandy (08:46):
I agree 100%.
L w y brother and I we wouldtalk about death honestly and
you know he wasn't afraid to die.
He always said that he feltlike he was going to die young.
He had contracted COVID and wedidn't think he was going to
make it.
But he did.
(09:08):
And you know we were all like,wow, this is amazing.
You know.
But he suffered a lot, like hehad bad lungs from it and you
know he struggled with the aftereffects from it.
Rebecca (09:23):
And so COVID just wasn't his means of exit and t
that timing wasn't his timing.
But then he did meet his meansof exit and his timing.
And so you went from that tohow long was it before the next
event?
That was, your son's accident,next right
Sandy (09:43):
Oh, I would say, not even six months.
Rebecca (09:47):
You were handling his affair your brother's affairs
after his death, so you had thatgoing on right.
Sandy (09:51):
I did, and I was also handling my father.
Rebecca (09:53):
And your dad's yeah right.
Sandy (09:56):
So I was, you know, trying to handle my father's.
I was trying to handle mybrother's and I'll never forget
my husband and I.
I w were going out to eat andmy daughter called me and she
says mom, and I just said whathappened and she was like mom
and I knew, I just knew I hadthis feeling and she was like
(10:18):
Alex has was hit by a carcrossing the street and he's
been life flighted.
Rebecca (10:25):
And we're in Pennsylvania.
he was ?undefined He NorthCarolina North.
C.
So shocker I mean that's, andat that point you knew he'd been
hit and life flighted.
But that's not a lot of detail,it's startling detail, Right?
So what happened then?
Sandy (10:45):
Well, you know, of course , my daughter tried to get us a
plane out.
In the meantime I was trying totalk to the police and
everybody to see if they couldgive me any information.
You know, was he breathing?
Was he?
Y k, okay?
?
o c n c could.
Was he?
You know O Okay f of coursenobody could.
(11:07):
He lifeflighted flightedlighted lifelighted to a
military facility and that'swhere I thought that I was going
to that hospital and so Icalled, couldn't get no
information.
Once he was, I guess the word Iwant to use is they felt safe
enough that lifeflighted could ebe lifelighted l He was
lifelighted to a trauma center.
So, you know, I wasn't evensure where he was.
(11:32):
A good friend of his, who wasraised with him, picked me up
and drove me to see him becausen couldn't get no flights out
until the next day, which wayway way way was no way.
I that's a long drive.
Yes, so you.
(11:53):
Thankfully, one s y bestfriends was able to drive you
down and you went straightthrough.
I'm assuming you went straightthrough.
I a.
Yes, we did, we did.
And on the way down there I waspraying to my brother and I
said to my brother, please, Icannot lose my son.
(12:15):
I can't, I don't think I willbe able to handle it.
You know, I just can't.
And next thing, I know you knowwe're down there and I'll never
forget walking in that hospitalroom and seeing him lay there.
I completely fell apart.
I went up to him and I saidsign up here.
(12:40):
And of course you know he wascompletely out of it.
I said you know mom's here andyou're going to be okay.
So I was asking him you know,can you squeeze mom's hand?
Can you wiggle your toes?
You know the doctors kepttaking him back.
(13:00):
The way that trauma works, theysay they start from the worst
to the least.
So he had to go in and he had apelvis operation, a back
operation.
You know he had a broken arm,his knees, he was pretty much
broke from the neck down.
Rebecca (13:20):
From the neck down only .
I mean that kind of a caraccident.
Shouldn't his head have beendamaged?
Sandy (13:27):
You know, this is something that I tell everybody
and I believe this with all myheart.
When I was talking to my son, Isaid to him you know, son,
you're going to be okay.
And he whispered to me Mom,uncle Richie said hell no.
And he put his belly around myhead.
Rebecca (13:48):
Which I love because there's so much information in
that.
Sandy (13:57):
Yes, and my brother, you have to understand, he had a big
belly and you know we wouldalways tease him about it
because when he would laugh, youknow, of course his belly would
jiggle.
And when he said that to me, Ijust had the hairs on my arms
were just standing up and I saidto the doctors in the meantime
(14:19):
the doctors kept taking him backfor CT scans and MRIs on his
brain and I finally said to oneof the doctors I said you're
lying to me.
You know my son has braindamage and you just don't want
to tell me this and I'll neverforget that doctor looked at me
and he said no.
(14:39):
He said it's like he's brokefrom the neck down and we just
keep checking to make surethere's no bleeding on the brain
.
I was just like wow, wow.
Rebecca (14:53):
Because what are the chances, y k, when you're hit
that hard ynAndy ou ou you saidhe flew like seven feet into
the air?
Sandy (15:00):
Yes, he was not in a vehicle.
He was actually crossing astreet.
And a vehicle hit him w t c h h.
Yes yes, and so I love that.
Rebecca (15:09):
Your brother, or the soul that was your brother, used
humor, I think, to get amessage across, you know,
because in my awareness, nobodystops the train of death.
It's just something that playsout beautifully and is well
synchronized, whether we agreewith it or not or like it or not
(15:31):
, and so it clearly was not yourson's day to die.
It was his day for an accident,though, which we call an
accident, but there's no suchthing as an accident.
There's the stuff of life, andyou, asking your brother and
just saying like I just can'thappen, gave him a perfect
(15:53):
opportunity to put his sort ofbelly in there as a buffer.
(Yes, When, really, what reallywhat's happening is?
Your son's head was shieldedfrom the force of the whole
accident, and your brother choseand your son saw it in that way
of your brother's belly becausehe had a big belly right, and
(16:16):
that's funny.
Yes, because wouldn't we thinkthat that would be a nice buffer
between the pavement orwhatever over his head?
Hit and his head.
Sandy (16:26):
Yes.
Rebecca (16:27):
To put somebody's belly in there and to say like, oh
hell, no, this is not going tohappen, and put that little
buffer in there.
think hink Think that that wasas beautiful is, everything is.
hat comes from the other side,because they love to help us
take the seriousness out ofwhat's really happening, and I
(16:49):
think that was a point.
And it also fits your brother,because he was just a fun guy.
Sandy (16:55):
Yes, He was like the ray of sunshine, you know he could
make anybody laugh.
That's you know that.
That was his character and wesay that all the time.
He loved jokes, love to playjokes, love Snapchat.
He was just a loved funnyperson.
Rebecca (17:18):
And so that fits him perfectly.
It was a good message for allof you.
Yes, and your son doesn'tremember even saying that, right
?
Sandy (17:27):
He does not.
I remember a couple monthslater, when he had come home, he
was in the hospital.
I believe it was like 54 daysand he came home.
He was in a wheelchair, ofcourse, couldn't walk, but I
remember sitting on the porch Iwas telling him you know we were
(17:47):
talking and I said I don'tthink you realize how serious
your accident was.
And I told him about what hehad told me and he did not
remember and he actually tearedup, was like wow, and he does
remember.
You know, he told me thatheaven's a beautiful place.
He said it's.
(18:08):
It's very vibrant and andbeautiful, interesting, so he
saw it.
Rebecca (18:14):
He saw it, he experienced it.
He just wasn't.
It wasn't his time to fullytransition.
Sandy (18:21):
Yes.
Rebecca (18:22):
But it was his time for life to change, for him and for
all of you really.
And so, with all of the brokenbones and just the extreme
damage that was done to hisentire body, from the neck down,
with all of that, he's up andwalking today.
Sandy (18:46):
He is.
Rebecca (18:47):
And when I came to your birthday party, it had been a
long time since we saw eachother and I was with Patty and I
said you know that's Sandy'sson, isn't it?
And she said, yeah, that's him.
And I said, well, how is hewalking around, isn't that?
You know, I'm just trying toput two and two together?
(19:09):
And she said, yeah, that's him.
And I said I would never haveknown if I didn't know that that
that happened.
Sandy (19:15):
Yes.
Rebecca (19:15):
I would never have known that that's the same guy
that was so broken and damaged,that that's the same guy that
was so broken and damaged, butyet here he is walking around
like like seemingly normal.
You know, I'm sure he's stillgoing through some physical
healing and stuff like that, butit was just incredible.
And so it just goes to show youthat, no matter what comes at
us, there's honey in everything.
(19:36):
We can be okay.
Okay, we always have thepotential to be okay, whether we
die or live, and the body is anamazing machine that can be
repaired and can repair itself,and you know your son's walking
proof of that.
Absolutely
Sandy (20:00):
L I s, h h.
You know, he's still enduringsurgeries he is currently.
H k, e just had both shouldersdone.
He has to go back in to do an a.
And it's no coincidence eitherthat he got a glimpse of the
other side, because that, notnot?
(20:22):
I'm sure that helped him tthrough n n and is still helping
him, but it also helps all ofyou get some further
understanding about where yourhusband is now right.
Yes, so you're in.
Was it North Carolina?
North So Carolina, you're in aNorth i Carolina N C.
(Sandy (20:38):
Carolina Carolina) y your i son N C what y happened
with your husband?
Sandy (20:44):
I was down there, I was going on day eight and I was
going to come home and surprisemy husband.
In the meantime, you know, myhusband was insistent.
He was like I don't want you tocome home, your son needs you.
I'm fine, you just stay downthere.
I don't care you to come home,our son needs you, I'm fine, y j
s d t.
I d c.
Y k Iit it costs I n f t this.
(21:06):
I had just talked to him twohours prior and I just left the
hospital.
We were going out to a w h j fd dinner.
And we had just finished dinnerand my phone rings and it's my
daughter and she was justhysterical and I kept saying
(21:27):
what is wrong and she said it'sdad.
So my husband h had a heartattack and did not make it.
Rebecca (21:34):
So now here you go again.
You're states away, Yes, Andluckily you were planning on
coming back, so your mind wasalready in that direction, but
now you had to come back.
Sandy (21:47):
I did and I c b.
I will be honest with you.
I don't even remember cominghome.
My son has wonderful friendsand there was several of his
friends down there and one ofthem, one of the girls that w,
had come down to see him, got meand her a plane ticket and she
(22:11):
got me on a plane and brought meback.
My cousin had picked me up fromthe airport and I said I want
to go see my, s m husband.
So she h called the funeralhome and the funeral home was
like, oh well, he's not ready ft l.
H w l y cousin goes, Iunderstand that.
But told h the circumstancesand he was like, oh, no problem.
(22:34):
So she took me to the funeralhome and I walked into the room
and there he was laying and Iwent over to him and I looked at
him and I'll never forget this.
I looked at him and I said, ohmy God, you shaved.
And you have to know, myhusband, m h, only shaved on
(22:58):
SPECIAL vspecial occasions.
I loved his beard I w was, Icalled him Grizzly grizzly Adams
and the funeral director waslike, oh, I didn't shave him.
You know, I didn't do that.
And I was like no, no, I'm notsaying that you did it, I'm
saying my husband only shaved onspecial occasions.
Rebecca (23:23):
That's incredible.
That's incredible, and that's amic drop kind of a thing, isn't
it?
Sandy (23:27):
It is, and I was just .
so.
like it took me back and I waslike wow, did he know?
You know, of course coursestill so many things are going
through my mind.
But the more that I look backand I think of things, I'm like
(23:50):
wow, I think he was telling me.
Rebecca (23:55):
Without knowing it R, make sure that this transition
(24:17):
happens in a way that is thathas information in it.
Y k that's good for everybody.
And, like you said, he didn'tshave.
He wouldn't have shaved justbecause you were coming home.
He wouldn't have shaved.
o go out to dinner, e didn'tshave, unless it was a very
special occasion like a wedding,right?
Sandy (24:35):
Absolutely.
A funny story is when my oldestdaughter got married.
Y You k know, he the nightbefore we went for the rehearsal
dinner, of course my husbandwasn't shaved up and the next
day we go to the wedding and thelady that was assisting with
the wedding said to my husband,well, who are you?
And he said, well, that's mydaughter.
(24:57):
And she was like, wow, youclean up pretty nice, and so
that was a special occasion forhim yeah, Something in him just
had to shave.
Rebecca (25:11):
Yes absolutely, nd he probably didn't have any idea
why he was shaving.
Sandy (25:15):
Nope.
Rebecca (25:15):
B So I think that it's the little things like that that
have the biggest messages forus, that he probably didn't
consciously know he was going topass, but something in him
(25:36):
shaved.
Sandy (25:38):
Yes.
Rebecca (25:39):
And I find this so often.
You know that these little bitsof honey, these little pieces
of information are there justlike hints for us, so that we
something in us can remember.
e're not ever doing this aloneand it's not ever out of order.
It's not always necessarilyeasy, but didn't that help?
(26:01):
You put, I mean like you.
You said you had to see him,like you were so fried at this
point because of everything thathad been going on, because here
you are with your son, but youstill have estates to take care
of and things like that, sothere's still life.
And then this happens with yourhusband.
You're, y just sort of at theend of your your rope at that
(26:21):
point.
Yes, ll of creation knew that.
Yes, ll of creation made surethat these little signs were in
there, because when you lookedat him and saw he shaved, I bet
you felt relief.
Sandy (26:36):
I did, I was, I just was totally taken back.
Rebecca (26:42):
Because, yeah, it's such a big thing L you can't
deny that, you know, like hedidn't shave for any other
reason ever than somethingreally really big, and so
something in him knew thatsomething big was coming.
Yes, nd didn't you say that h h?
Sandy (27:13):
c conversation.
, husband loved to take gunsafterwards, fix them husband,
clean them.
And a good o friend of c ours dhad b been at the house the
night before and you know theywere sitting there talking and
we have a room, what we call thegun room per se, and he said he
took me up there and showed meeverything and was y like k this
(27:37):
one goes to this grandchild,this one goes ttle room, room
this grandchild, this one goesto this grandchild.
And was naming each of thegrandchildren and what was
supposed to go to them.
one e
Rebecca (27:48):
Just ironically, which there no coincidences
coincidence R.
Sandy (27:52):
And when he told me that, I just was like, s t b, I just
was like, wow, why would he, y k, do this, why would he show him
this and make sure that thekids get these?
Rebecca (28:11):
And I think it shows how intuitive we all are and we
don't realize it, because I'msure he was guided, something in
him was queuing all that upwithout his conscious thought
about it, you know, queuing up aconversation with this friend
(28:33):
and showing him, y k, this gungoes to this kid, this one goes
to this one, and then shaving aj these things that are so
perfectly synchronized and fullof meaning need to be looked at,
y k, need to be paid attentionto, because that's what helps us
understand and believe thatthere's more to all of us than
(28:56):
what we see in this everydaylife that we're in, and that
life, the stuff of life, doesn'thappen by accident.
You know, it's not like thingsare meant to be.
It's not like people think.
nyway, we are meant to come into have a life because we chose
to.
We're meant to leave when weleave, because that's part of
(29:16):
what we design for ourselves.
We k, W, n my belief, we decideto come into an incarnation.
We decide the particulars ofthe people we'll be associated
with.
We sort of all plan this out toan extent, but not down to the
very last detail.
We know the mile markers.
We also know the focus of whatwe're coming in, like, how we
(29:38):
want to expand in this life andw w b g, what would be the good
scenarios for that, what kind ofpersonality would be helpful,
what type of body, all that kindof stuff.
And then we have this free will.
So we get to do this any way wewant to.
But there are going to be thosemile markers that are going to
synchronize up.
And then, because of what we'reexperiencing here and how we
(30:03):
perceive it and the thoughts wehave about it, everything is
being intermingled like,synchronized, beautifully.
If we would just stand back andlook at it from like a bird's
eye view or they look throughthe eyes of source, look at it
from a broader perspective wecan see the things that are in
(30:23):
there to help us through.
Yes, because without some ofthe things that you talked about
, it would have been so muchmore difficult for you and
confusing.
Sandy (30:33):
And you know, a lot of people said to me like how, how
did you get through it?
How are you getting through it?
You know, I look back and I sayyou know, we're never promised
tomorrow.
I just look back and see somany different things and say
(30:54):
wow.
Rebecca (30:56):
L w.
So that's one of the t o o tmain reasons why I do this
podcast, because I've learned tonot take life so seriously and
to not take death seriously andto look for the good stuff
that's there and that's why Ilike to call it the honey,
because honey is sweet and it'sprecious, because this planet
(31:19):
doesn't survive without bees whomake the honey.
They make the good stuff.
It's just sprinkled everywhere,But we've b for the most part.
W been taught to fall apartwhen things happen in a way, we
don't want them to happen or wethink isn't a good experience.
Sandy (31:40):
I think too, and I tell everybody this it's a lifestyle
change.
Rebecca (31:45):
Yeah.
Sandy (31:46):
You know it's it's you know how you watch TV, how you
cook it's.
It's a whole lifestyle changetoo.
Rebecca (31:54):
It is and we came here for that variety.
That's the, that's the nicepart about it.
We didn't come here to havesame same same, live ive forever
othing Nothing changes.
We would be bored with that andthere's no real expansion that
comes from that Y k know n inorder for eternity to be eternal
, we have to be thinking newthoughts, we have to be having
(32:15):
new experiences.
Things have to change and lifeshows us that our whole entire
lives.
We see pets come and go, we seeflowers come and go, we see all
kinds of change happening andthings dying off and renewing
and back and forth.
And that's supposed to help usget used to the fact that our
(32:36):
lives are going to change andthat people are going to come
and go.
We are going to come and go andthe more we understand that and
just relax about it, then wewill be able to see a broader
view of what's really going on.
Because we could look at whatyour son went through.
You know, and I'm sure peoplearound you said that's a tragedy
(33:00):
.
That has to be hard for you.
How are you getting throughthis?
Will you survive this?
Which really doesn't help us,because that puts more
seriousness into it.
It sort of reinforces theterribleness of it.
Sandy (33:14):
?
Rebecca (33:14):
say those things, but it's just what we've been
conditioned to say and to do,instead of saying wow, like that
is a big change.
What's next?
How's it going?
What does it look like?
Where is the good stuff in it?
Because it's not like life.
Looked at your son one day andsaid well, let's just have a car
(33:37):
hit him and, you know, break uphis body a lot, and now let's
just see how he does with that.
It's not that.
It's not that he did anythingwrong that caused that.
It's just that we come here forthe variety and we come here
for the things that make us digdeep, because that's where we
get our best experientiallearning and understanding from,
(33:58):
because you're all different.
Now.
Because of all of that, yes,and didn't all of that bring you
inward more?
Absolutely.
Doesn't it make you findyourself and understand some
things about life.
I mean for sure, you know nowthat your brother's alive, your
(34:18):
husband's alive.
They're not the men that youknew here, but they're the souls
who had that role while theywere here, that you are very
connected with and you cancontinue to be connected with.
And you also know that your sonis not only okay.
He's not the same as he wasbefore the accident, not
(34:38):
physically, emotionally,mentally, spiritually or
anything else.
He's changed in all of thoseways since that day Y es nd Yes,
and that's a really, reallygood thing.
You know, from a soul'sperspective, we're okay that the
body gets broken, because we'renot the body and we know the
body knows how to rejuvenateitself and repair and heal
itself, and that we haveoperations here that can assist
(35:02):
in that.
So we're not afraid for thebody.
We're not saying those thingsshouldn't happen.
From a soul perspective, we'regetting the honey from that
stuff.
We know that we're digging deep.
We know that that kind ofcontrast is helping us to expand
and to question life even more,which is great, because when
(35:26):
your mom and your uncles, aunts,whatever, your brother, your
husband, when they die, doesn'tit make you think are they
really still alive, or have weall just been saying that?
So there's that, and then youget these little bits of
information that help you.
It's not like the other sidecomes and burns a bush for us to
(35:49):
illuminate the fact that lifecontinues on.
What they do is they sprinklelittle things along our way.
I call them breadcrumbs.
If we pick up the breadcrumbs,then we understand a little bit
more, we trust a little more, wefear a little less, and every
(36:10):
circumstance like this has bigopportunity for us to learn to
trust the divine nature of lifeand the divine order of life,
because we've been convincedthat things should go the way we
think they should go, andthat's not true.
Things are always in abeautiful divine order.
Sandy (36:33):
And it's kind of funny because yesterday my son sent me
a little chat and he was likethe song Alan Jackson when Daddy
Let Me Drive had come on theradio and kind of like a funny
story.
But my husband had an older carand when my son was like 12 or
(36:54):
13 would take him up to RIDCPark and let him sit and drive
and we used to chuckle aboutthat.
And so he was like, oh, mom,dad's saying hello to me today.
He said I wanted to show youwhat just came over the radio.
He said I was sitting herethinking about Dad and he just
(37:15):
sent me a sign telling me he'ssaying hello to me.
Rebecca (37:20):
Because oftentimes when we think about them, it's
because they were thinking aboutus first or they're sending
their thoughts in our directionat that time Because it's a fun
game for them.
It's a fun interaction to slipa little bit of something
through a little crack ofnon-resistance that we have in
(37:41):
that moment to just say I'mright here.
I'm right here and people sayto me can you tell them that I
love them, or can you tell themthat I said this or I said that?
And I always say I don't haveto tell them, you just did.
You did before the words cameout of your mouth.
They're not invading ourprivacy.
It's a whole different outlookfrom the other side.
(38:04):
But they're very aware of ourthoughts, they know where our
heart is, they know what ourstruggles are, they know what
our limitations are, they knowwhat our potentials are, and so
they're guiding us through allof this with that understanding
and it's completelyunconditional love.
(38:26):
You know, in one of the podcastepisodes in the beginning I used
an analogy of this.
Life is like we're in this biggiant living maze and
everything's changing in themaze all the time and there's a
lot going on.
There's a lot of people, a lotof stuff and when you're in a
maze you can't see it all.
So let's say you're in thismaze of life and you're making
(38:48):
your way through it, but youhave a whole slew of people that
you love, that you trust amillion percent.
You know that.
What they say, you can go by.
They have a bird's eye view.
They can see the whole maze,they see what everybody else is
up to, they see what's aroundthe corners, they see the
opportunities and the obstaclesand they are giving you say it's
(39:11):
a game show, right?
They're giving you some cluesabout when to go quicker, when
to sit down, when to bend overand tie your shoe because
something's going to fly rightin front of you and they're far
away.
You can hear them, but they'rekind of far, and so it works out
really well when you're reallittle.
Your mind's not too busy,you're not distracted too much
(39:33):
out there.
So you hear them very well.
Watch kids, they navigate verywell and then over time we
become more distracted with themaze.
Now we're more focused with themaze and what's happening in the
maze, what everybody else isdoing in the maze, what they
might not be doing, what theythink.
We're trying to figure it out.
We're trying to figure it out.
We think we're doing this alone.
(39:53):
Now it really seems like we'redoing it alone Because the more
we do that, the less we can hearthat guidance.
We tune it out withoutrealizing we're doing it because
we're so busy in our mind andso distracted with figuring out
the maze and not take life soseriously.
(40:17):
Not try to figure this life out.
We would get those impulsesthat make you show your friend
your guns and who you want toget those guns, without even
knowing it.
It's the guidance that has youjust decide you want to shave
when you don't really know whyyou're shaving, probably don't
even think about it, you justshave, you know.
(40:39):
It's that kind of stuff that wethink are our own thoughts.
Sandy (40:44):
Here's another little thing that happened to me.
My daughter had moved out ofher place that my husband and I
had owned.
So you know, we were painting.
Me and my girlfriend were downthere painting and my son had
some friends help me.
Do you know things that justneeded to be done before I could
(41:05):
get the place ready.
I was down in the basement andmy girlfriend come down and she
was like hey, did your husbandcall you pumpkin doodle?
And I looked at her and I waslike what are you talking about?
And she was like here and shehanded me a note.
(41:25):
That has to be.
I've been with my husband sinceI was 20.
So the note has to be 25 yearsold, 30.
Has to be 25 years old, 30.
And I read the note andbasically it just said you know,
there's a frozen mug in thefreezer for you.
(41:47):
You can have a beer, but leaveme one for the football game.
Now I was so taken back becausefor two days I had been down
there, you know, painting andjust doing all this physical
labor, and I was like wow.
(42:07):
So I called my son and I saidyou're not going to believe this
.
Now, mind you, we never livedin that house the cupboard that
the note was found in my husbanddid not build, so how did the
note get there?
Rebecca (42:25):
And if it was written all those years ago, somebody's
lived in that place since then,right?
Or during that period of time,right?
So if it was just randomly inthe the cupboard, somebody would
have seen it and tossed it, orwhatever and that's what I had
called my son and I told him andhe was like mom, he goes.
Sandy (42:45):
I cleaned u that cupboard .
It was nothing in that cupboardand I was like I'm telling you,
this is where she found thenote and he was like dad's just
telling you to take it easy.
Rebecca (42:57):
Yep have a beer, .
ep.
h ep, b have a beer.
You know, and this is child'splay for them.
This is easy stuff, you know.
We look at it and go.
That is incredible.
It's a little miracle thatsomething like that could happen
, that the note could just bethere all of a sudden, in really
good timing, and really goodtiming.
(43:19):
And they always tell us, like wedo that all day long, every day
, like that's not just just payattention, get easy about this
stuff.
You know, the higher we arevibrationally, in other words,
the more ease we feel, or thehappy, the more happy we are,
the more calm we are, the moreplayful we are, the more curious
(43:39):
we are.
That's where we're going to beavailable to that stuff.
That's how we can pick up onthe things that are being
offered all day long.
Sandy (43:49):
Yes.
Rebecca (43:51):
You know, guidance isn't something that comes in
spurts.
Guidance is always streamingthat comes in spurts.
Guidance is always streamingthe other side, all of creation
source always streaming, alwaysattentive, always seeing the
bigger picture and very willingto prod us along the way.
(44:14):
They never tell us what to door what not to do, and they
don't tell us definitely what'sgoing to happen and what's not
going to happen, for the mostpart, because we have the
freedom to change things.
They that's why they guide usto.
This might be a good idea foryou.
Consider this or look at this.
This will help you understandthat I'm still alive.
(44:35):
This will help you.
This will just reinforce justone more little thing, to
reinforce that I'm still here,I'm still playing.
If you play too, then we, weboth can interact better.
And so people may think I'mloony when I talk to animals or
(44:55):
birds.
I'm loony when I talk toanimals or birds or when I thank
my mother for something who isno longer physical, or whatever.
You know, when I'm just lookingat a tree and loving this tree,
people might think I'm loonyfor that, and that's fine.
That's okay, because I know forsure inside myself that
(45:17):
everything is alive andcommunicating Signs don't just
come from a note or you knowthings like that.
They come from experiences,they come from insects and you
know just these things.
That we think is I just happento look at that billboard right
(45:38):
now you know that happens to meall the time where I'll just
happen to turn my head and I seesomething that has a meaning
for me or a message for me.
Why did I just happen to turnmy head in that moment and look
exactly where I looked?
Because that's how guidanceworks.
So you see how the easier weare about it, the more we get in
the flow with it, becausethey're not pushing us to look
(46:00):
at anything or to pick up a note.
They're just just like they dofly in formation because the
guidance just is there.
It's available for them tointerpret and then interact.
(46:25):
In that way, they're notthinking and planning with each
other who's going to be at whichpart of that formation.
It's just something thatthey're flowing in the direction
of and the understanding of,and we can do that too.
The thing that trips us up iswe're logical thinkers and we're
(46:47):
more complicated thinkers,which is great I mean, that was
the design but it doesn't meanthat we can't see guidance when
it's right there or feel it,because it's not always an item
you can pick up.
Sometimes it's a sensation or athought that comes through.
So there, it's always there.
(47:07):
But the thing I encourage peopleabout you know, when somebody
passes this close to you, do thebest you can to honor the fact
that that person's journey herein the physical is done.
That's a wonderful thing.
Keep them alive in your life,but don't keep them overly alive
(47:31):
in your life, because there's areason why you're still here,
going on physically, and they'regoing on non-physically, no
different than like, forinstance, for us being very
close friends and being a bigpart of each other's lives, and
then not for quite a while,right, and now again right.
(47:53):
We sync up Because when it fits, it fits.
When it has purpose for bothparties or many parties, then it
just does.
And when it's not really, whenit's not serving us to be here
physically, it's not servinganybody else either for us to be
here physically, and that's whywe leave.
(48:14):
When we leave, because there isa greater sort of undercurrent
to all this stuff.
There's a greater expansionthat's happening here for
everything and everybody, and wedon't have all the details to
it while we're in the physical,while we're in the physical.
(48:39):
So we pay attention, weremember that, yeah, we're in
this big changing maze and ifanytime we can, on purpose, calm
ourselves down, find a way tocenter ourselves, bring our
attention back to where ourawareness is and maybe even just
sit in silence for a minute ora second, even that helps.
You know, when we look for thehoney, when we give up the
(49:05):
decision that this is a badthing and that this should
really be tearing me apart, whenwe stop doing that, I think too
.
Sandy (49:14):
y k, for our own selfish reasons.
Y k, nd I'm not sure if I'musing the right terms, but y k
we want that person herephysically.
Sure, y k, ike I said, I cookdifferent, I watch TV different.
I pay my bills different.
You know it's a lifestylechange.
Rebecca (49:33):
Yeah, and this is your time for that, because the way
it was with the both of you hereis finished.
It doesn't mean he's not stillhere, but this is time for you
to still be here physically andnot.
It's just not time for him tobe here physically, you know,
and we're all eternal.
(49:54):
So we really don't want to stayhere forever and we don't want
to keep the same relationshipsforever, but we have an instinct
to survive and I think that'sthe thing that keeps us here,
because if we didn't have aninstinct to survive, many of us
would leave, which is this the fout?
(50:16):
Second death, d.
Third death you definitelywould have been out.
So we have an instinct.
Something in us helps usremember that we can go on.
Sandy (50:26):
And a lot of people say to me oh, you're one of the
strongest people I know.
Like how, how are you gettingthrough it?
How are you doing it?
And you know, know, like I said, my brother and I used to talk
about death.
U, I b h, I'm not afraid to die.
Good.
y k I know I'm k t you know I'mI up u gonna see all my friends
(50:51):
and you know we're gonna have yk party.
And it was like even when myhusband passed, he w was like
look at, when something happensto a me, you put me in my box
and you, you put me, y, y p msomebody, I don't d want w no s
big funeral, I don't wantsomebody coming gawking at me.
I'm gone.
Yeah, you know and you know y kI y k I think a lot of people
(51:16):
were shocked by that.
But I was going by what hiswants were yeah.
Rebecca (51:23):
And I think that the more simple, the better, in my
opinion.
You know, with those of us whoare still here physically making
that adjustment, yeah, makingthat adjustment, yeah, the more
(51:43):
simple we let it be, the themore ease we put into it.
And when people say to you, howare you making it through this,
I would just say I just am,because I can.
Why are you not falling apart?
Because I don't't have to.
I can, and there were momentswhere I did, but I have to go on
.
And I t y k, I know for sure,that those on the other side
(52:08):
want us to go on and find ourjoy, to find our life.
They want us to go on and behappy.
I mean, you know for sure thatRichie would never be anywhere,
even on this physical planet,when he was still here
physically, wishing that anybodywould be miserable.
Sandy (52:26):
Right.
Rebecca (52:27):
Because t w n h.
He wouldn't have wanted thatwhen he was here.
He certainly wouldn't want itnow that he's passed, for
anybody here to be miserablebecause he is not here
physically anymore.
And we all feel that way, fromwhat they tell me on the other
side, that we all want thosethat are still here to just find
their own joy, find their love,find their life.
(52:49):
They love it when we know thatthey're still a part of it, but
they're okay when we don't knowthat too.
Sandy (53:00):
Kind of funny, because my son and I were talking and he
was like you know, mom, there'sthere's a reason why you're
still here and dad's gone.
Dad has always said yeah that Ibetter pass before mom because
I don't think I would be able tosurvive, and that's just the
way my husband was, but he sayshe knows that you would be okay.
Rebecca (53:27):
Y, y, b I think that, y k, we definitely all have it in
us to make it through.
Whatever shows up in our lives,we really do.
We can not believe that.
And then it.
Whatever shows up in our lives,we really do.
We can not believe that.
And then it doesn't look sogood, but we really do.
And even if somebody is goingthrough something with no other
people being a part of that,they're still not going through
(53:49):
it alone.
There's no such thing as goingthrough anything here alone.
We can think we are, but that'snever actually the truth.
And the more we understand that, the more we can hear the
people or the souls from thebird's eye view, you know, the
more we get the encouragement,you know, and the guidance to be
(54:09):
able to go on.
, sandy, I came really this hasbeen came a great conversation.
I came really think thatthere's came a lot of honey in
came that people came will beable to gain from your
experiences and to see that youknow you can.
Life can just come at you andcome at you, and come at you and
come at you, and then comeagain, come again, and it kept
(54:34):
getting closer to home, so tospeak.
But yet here you are, yes, andthere's your son walking around,
still having another surgery,but he's still walking around
because it's not his time to notbe here physically, and it
certainly isn't yours either.
So thank you very much fortoday.
Thank you for having me.
(54:54):
I'm so glad you came for today.
Thank you for having me, I'm soglad you came.
And to all of you out there, dothe best you can to choose
thoughts that just feel any sortof way better than the ones
that are pulling you down.
Even a little bit better ismovement in the right direction
and in the direction of healingand recovering from whatever
(55:18):
comes at you, because it's notlike life is throwing anything
at us.
This is the stuff of life.
This is what we came here for.
Sandy (55:25):
You just got to keep going forward.
Rebecca (55:28):
Yeah, it's how we grow, Keep going forward, keep
expanding, keep learning.
So you can find me atmysticaltruthscom.
Welcome to the Mystical Truths Podcast.
This is Rebecca, and I'm reallyglad you're here.
Let's unlock your world.
We all go through rough stuffand many of us have had periods
when it just keeps coming andcoming and coming.
It can be really hard to keepyour head above turbulent waters
(00:30):
and at some point, I think youfind yourself asking all of
creation why?
Li How can I make it throughthis?
But somehow we do.
There just seems to besomething within us that gets us
through another day and another, and we make it through.
I've asked a friend to talkwith me here today and share the
(00:53):
turbulent events of her lifeover the past few years or so,
and her story will not only blowyour mind but it will touch
your heart.
My guest today is Sandy DeMonte.
Hi, sandy.
Welcome to the show.
Hi, thanks for having me.
(01:14):
I'm really glad to have you andI've been thinking about this
for a while.
Sandy and I grew up in the samesmall town and we were great
friends and we really let thegood times roll in high school.
Do you remember that?
Sandy (01:22):
Oh, yes, time wer o.
Hig schoo D yo remembe tha?
Rebecca (01:25):
O y, fter graduation we , along with our friend Patty,
went to medical trainingtogether and then work and
family and life in general justgot busy and we drifted apart
and the three of us earlier thisyear reconnected and after our
little reunion I kept thinkingof how the details of Sandy's
(01:47):
world over the past few yearscould really help other people.
So before we get into yourriveting story, Sandy, I want to
make two important points here.
One is that in the top five ofmy most listened to podcast
episodes are Calming Your Mind,which is number one, Connecting
(02:11):
with the Other Side and Why WeDie the Way We Do, and we're
going to touch on each one ofthose in one way or another as
we go forward, because they'reall really important.
I mean, those are important, Ithink, to most people i Y k, ow
(02:32):
do I stay calm?
How do I get through stuff?
What about the other side?
And why do we die the way we do?
Because it's never acoincidence, it's never a
mistake.
The other point I want to makeis that it's really i often not
helpful to look backwards.
However, when we look into thepast and find the honey, it's
not only helpful but it can be aguiding light for others.
(02:55):
So that's why I'm okay with uslooking backwards and I really,
you know I can't wait to get tothe sort of mic dropping kind of
honey that you found in thefuneral home.
Sandy (03:07):
Absolutely.
Rebecca (03:09):
But we won't spoil it.
We won't get into that untilit's time.
So take us to when your happylife started to turn.
Sandy (03:15):
Well, within a matter of a span of two years, I lost my
mother unexpectedly, and then Ilost an aunt and an uncle, and
then I lost my father, and theday that we buried my father, my
(03:36):
brother passed away.
So it was.
I just felt like it just waskeeping coming.
Then my son was in an accident.
He was out of state andcrossing a street and was hit by
a car and was life flighted toa military hospital and then
(04:00):
life flighted to a trauma center.
I went down to, of course, bewith my son, and while I was
down there my husband passedaway.
So I felt like my whole worldwas just j crashing.
Rebecca (04:17):
Oh yeah, you know, and so your mom dies, some other
relatives die.
Y, ou have a big family, by theway several siblings, yes, and
some drama.
Yes, I'm sure that all familieshave.
So there's that in there aswell, and then your dad passed,
(04:40):
which created some more drama,I'm assuming right.
Sandy (04:45):
Yep absolutely.
Rebecca (04:47):
And your brother who is younger than you.
Sandy (04:49):
Yes, my little brother.
Rebecca (04:51):
W a t f.
What happened right before hepassed?
What was going on?
Sandy (04:56):
We had just left my aunt's because we had all gone
to my aunt's house for dinner.
My brother and I were extremelyclose.
He was at my house every day.
It was like I had two husbands,my brother and my husband, and
my husband and my brother wereclose too.
When I was at work, them twowould be outside waxing cars and
(05:21):
just sitting and bullshittinguntil I would get off work and
my husband would tease mybrother and call him my Miss
Daisy, because he would take mewherever I had to go.
What happened was he we had leftmy aunts and he wanted to go to
(05:42):
the casino to relax.
And he said hey, let's go downto relax for a little bit.
And I said, okay, let me gohome and grab some clothes,
because I had been staying withmy brother.
He lived with my father and Ihad been staying with him since
my father had passed.
And he was like no, I'm goingto be okay, I'm going to be fine
(06:04):
, I g t b f.
He said you go home, you getready.
He said I will call you atseven and if you don't hear from
me, you call me.
So it was seven o'clock and Icalled him and he didn't answer,
and that was very unusual and Ijust had this feeling.
(06:26):
I can't explain it to anybody.
I ran out of the house.
My son happened to be goingdown to the laundromat to do
clothes and I said I can't get ahold of Richie.
I can't get a hold of Richieand my father lived three
streets over from me, so I ranover, I opened the door and I
(06:48):
was calling for my brother andhe didn't answer and I went into
his bedroom.
He was taking a nap.
I screamed f his name and hedidn't answer and I started
doing CPR on him.
A I s d C o h.
My son, who happened to be downin the town that we live in,
(07:10):
said he got this feeling and hejust came to my dad's and he was
like I just knew something hadhappened.
Rebecca (07:28):
So, unfortunately, you know, c did not work and my
brother passed away away.
Do you think he was?
Sandy (07:30):
already passed before you got there.
When I got there, I felt likehe had not fully passed, if that
makes sense, sure, um, you know, because he still had some
color to his face.
Y k I just kept saying y k,Richie, please, you can't, you
can't do this to me, like Ican't lose you.
(07:50):
And you know I kept doing theCPR and, of course you know, the
ambulance and everybody wascoming and, to be honest with
you, that's kind of all Iremember.
I remember my son coming to meand looking at me and he was
like Mom, Richie, he's no longerwith us and that's honestly
(08:15):
that I remember.
Rebecca (08:17):
Y k, I do my best to help all of us not take life too
seriously, especially death.
However, that's a big changefor you, especially because you
were so close to him, you know,and around him so often.
So it's just something you'revery used to, and then in one
moment, that's not ever going tobe the same again.
(08:38):
R t.
I believe that they're all stillwith us and a part of our lives
, but not in that same way.
Sandy (08:46):
I agree 100%.
L w y brother and I we wouldtalk about death honestly and
you know he wasn't afraid to die.
He always said that he feltlike he was going to die young.
He had contracted COVID and wedidn't think he was going to
make it.
But he did.
(09:08):
And you know we were all like,wow, this is amazing.
You know.
But he suffered a lot, like hehad bad lungs from it and you
know he struggled with the aftereffects from it.
Rebecca (09:23):
And so COVID just wasn't his means of exit and t
that timing wasn't his timing.
But then he did meet his meansof exit and his timing.
And so you went from that tohow long was it before the next
event?
That was, your son's accident,next right
Sandy (09:43):
Oh, I would say, not even six months.
Rebecca (09:47):
You were handling his affair your brother's affairs
after his death, so you had thatgoing on right.
Sandy (09:51):
I did, and I was also handling my father.
Rebecca (09:53):
And your dad's yeah right.
Sandy (09:56):
So I was, you know, trying to handle my father's.
I was trying to handle mybrother's and I'll never forget
my husband and I.
I w were going out to eat andmy daughter called me and she
says mom, and I just said whathappened and she was like mom
and I knew, I just knew I hadthis feeling and she was like
(10:18):
Alex has was hit by a carcrossing the street and he's
been life flighted.
Rebecca (10:25):
And we're in Pennsylvania.
he was ?undefined He NorthCarolina North.
C.
So shocker I mean that's, andat that point you knew he'd been
hit and life flighted.
But that's not a lot of detail,it's startling detail, Right?
So what happened then?
Sandy (10:45):
Well, you know, of course , my daughter tried to get us a
plane out.
In the meantime I was trying totalk to the police and
everybody to see if they couldgive me any information.
You know, was he breathing?
Was he?
Y k, okay?
?
o c n c could.
Was he?
You know O Okay f of coursenobody could.
(11:07):
He lifeflighted flightedlighted lifelighted to a
military facility and that'swhere I thought that I was going
to that hospital and so Icalled, couldn't get no
information.
Once he was, I guess the word Iwant to use is they felt safe
enough that lifeflighted could ebe lifelighted l He was
lifelighted to a trauma center.
So, you know, I wasn't evensure where he was.
(11:32):
A good friend of his, who wasraised with him, picked me up
and drove me to see him becausen couldn't get no flights out
until the next day, which wayway way way was no way.
I that's a long drive.
Yes, so you.
(11:53):
Thankfully, one s y bestfriends was able to drive you
down and you went straightthrough.
I'm assuming you went straightthrough.
I a.
Yes, we did, we did.
And on the way down there I waspraying to my brother and I
said to my brother, please, Icannot lose my son.
(12:15):
I can't, I don't think I willbe able to handle it.
You know, I just can't.
And next thing, I know you knowwe're down there and I'll never
forget walking in that hospitalroom and seeing him lay there.
I completely fell apart.
I went up to him and I saidsign up here.
(12:40):
And of course you know he wascompletely out of it.
I said you know mom's here andyou're going to be okay.
So I was asking him you know,can you squeeze mom's hand?
Can you wiggle your toes?
You know the doctors kepttaking him back.
(13:00):
The way that trauma works, theysay they start from the worst
to the least.
So he had to go in and he had apelvis operation, a back
operation.
You know he had a broken arm,his knees, he was pretty much
broke from the neck down.
Rebecca (13:20):
From the neck down only .
I mean that kind of a caraccident.
Shouldn't his head have beendamaged?
Sandy (13:27):
You know, this is something that I tell everybody
and I believe this with all myheart.
When I was talking to my son, Isaid to him you know, son,
you're going to be okay.
And he whispered to me Mom,uncle Richie said hell no.
And he put his belly around myhead.
Rebecca (13:48):
Which I love because there's so much information in
that.
Sandy (13:57):
Yes, and my brother, you have to understand, he had a big
belly and you know we wouldalways tease him about it
because when he would laugh, youknow, of course his belly would
jiggle.
And when he said that to me, Ijust had the hairs on my arms
were just standing up and I saidto the doctors in the meantime
(14:19):
the doctors kept taking him backfor CT scans and MRIs on his
brain and I finally said to oneof the doctors I said you're
lying to me.
You know my son has braindamage and you just don't want
to tell me this and I'll neverforget that doctor looked at me
and he said no.
(14:39):
He said it's like he's brokefrom the neck down and we just
keep checking to make surethere's no bleeding on the brain
.
I was just like wow, wow.
Rebecca (14:53):
Because what are the chances, y k, when you're hit
that hard ynAndy ou ou you saidhe flew like seven feet into
the air?
Sandy (15:00):
Yes, he was not in a vehicle.
He was actually crossing astreet.
And a vehicle hit him w t c h h.
Yes yes, and so I love that.
Rebecca (15:09):
Your brother, or the soul that was your brother, used
humor, I think, to get amessage across, you know,
because in my awareness, nobodystops the train of death.
It's just something that playsout beautifully and is well
synchronized, whether we agreewith it or not or like it or not
(15:31):
, and so it clearly was not yourson's day to die.
It was his day for an accident,though, which we call an
accident, but there's no suchthing as an accident.
There's the stuff of life, andyou, asking your brother and
just saying like I just can'thappen, gave him a perfect
(15:53):
opportunity to put his sort ofbelly in there as a buffer.
(Yes, When, really, what reallywhat's happening is?
Your son's head was shieldedfrom the force of the whole
accident, and your brother choseand your son saw it in that way
of your brother's belly becausehe had a big belly right, and
(16:16):
that's funny.
Yes, because wouldn't we thinkthat that would be a nice buffer
between the pavement orwhatever over his head?
Hit and his head.
Sandy (16:26):
Yes.
Rebecca (16:27):
To put somebody's belly in there and to say like, oh
hell, no, this is not going tohappen, and put that little
buffer in there.
think hink Think that that wasas beautiful is, everything is.
hat comes from the other side,because they love to help us
take the seriousness out ofwhat's really happening, and I
(16:49):
think that was a point.
And it also fits your brother,because he was just a fun guy.
Sandy (16:55):
Yes, He was like the ray of sunshine, you know he could
make anybody laugh.
That's you know that.
That was his character and wesay that all the time.
He loved jokes, love to playjokes, love Snapchat.
He was just a loved funnyperson.
Rebecca (17:18):
And so that fits him perfectly.
It was a good message for allof you.
Yes, and your son doesn'tremember even saying that, right
?
Sandy (17:27):
He does not.
I remember a couple monthslater, when he had come home, he
was in the hospital.
I believe it was like 54 daysand he came home.
He was in a wheelchair, ofcourse, couldn't walk, but I
remember sitting on the porch Iwas telling him you know we were
(17:47):
talking and I said I don'tthink you realize how serious
your accident was.
And I told him about what hehad told me and he did not
remember and he actually tearedup, was like wow, and he does
remember.
You know, he told me thatheaven's a beautiful place.
He said it's.
(18:08):
It's very vibrant and andbeautiful, interesting, so he
saw it.
Rebecca (18:14):
He saw it, he experienced it.
He just wasn't.
It wasn't his time to fullytransition.
Sandy (18:21):
Yes.
Rebecca (18:22):
But it was his time for life to change, for him and for
all of you really.
And so, with all of the brokenbones and just the extreme
damage that was done to hisentire body, from the neck down,
with all of that, he's up andwalking today.
Sandy (18:46):
He is.
Rebecca (18:47):
And when I came to your birthday party, it had been a
long time since we saw eachother and I was with Patty and I
said you know that's Sandy'sson, isn't it?
And she said, yeah, that's him.
And I said, well, how is hewalking around, isn't that?
You know, I'm just trying toput two and two together?
(19:09):
And she said, yeah, that's him.
And I said I would never haveknown if I didn't know that that
that happened.
Sandy (19:15):
Yes.
Rebecca (19:15):
I would never have known that that's the same guy
that was so broken and damaged,that that's the same guy that
was so broken and damaged, butyet here he is walking around
like like seemingly normal.
You know, I'm sure he's stillgoing through some physical
healing and stuff like that, butit was just incredible.
And so it just goes to show youthat, no matter what comes at
us, there's honey in everything.
(19:36):
We can be okay.
Okay, we always have thepotential to be okay, whether we
die or live, and the body is anamazing machine that can be
repaired and can repair itself,and you know your son's walking
proof of that.
Absolutely
Sandy (20:00):
L I s, h h.
You know, he's still enduringsurgeries he is currently.
H k, e just had both shouldersdone.
He has to go back in to do an a.
And it's no coincidence eitherthat he got a glimpse of the
other side, because that, notnot?
(20:22):
I'm sure that helped him tthrough n n and is still helping
him, but it also helps all ofyou get some further
understanding about where yourhusband is now right.
Yes, so you're in.
Was it North Carolina?
North So Carolina, you're in aNorth i Carolina N C.
(Sandy (20:38):
Carolina Carolina) y your i son N C what y happened
with your husband?
Sandy (20:44):
I was down there, I was going on day eight and I was
going to come home and surprisemy husband.
In the meantime, you know, myhusband was insistent.
He was like I don't want you tocome home, your son needs you.
I'm fine, you just stay downthere.
I don't care you to come home,our son needs you, I'm fine, y j
s d t.
I d c.
Y k Iit it costs I n f t this.
(21:06):
I had just talked to him twohours prior and I just left the
hospital.
We were going out to a w h j fd dinner.
And we had just finished dinnerand my phone rings and it's my
daughter and she was justhysterical and I kept saying
(21:27):
what is wrong and she said it'sdad.
So my husband h had a heartattack and did not make it.
Rebecca (21:34):
So now here you go again.
You're states away, Yes, Andluckily you were planning on
coming back, so your mind wasalready in that direction, but
now you had to come back.
Sandy (21:47):
I did and I c b.
I will be honest with you.
I don't even remember cominghome.
My son has wonderful friendsand there was several of his
friends down there and one ofthem, one of the girls that w,
had come down to see him, got meand her a plane ticket and she
(22:11):
got me on a plane and brought meback.
My cousin had picked me up fromthe airport and I said I want
to go see my, s m husband.
So she h called the funeralhome and the funeral home was
like, oh well, he's not ready ft l.
H w l y cousin goes, Iunderstand that.
But told h the circumstancesand he was like, oh, no problem.
(22:34):
So she took me to the funeralhome and I walked into the room
and there he was laying and Iwent over to him and I looked at
him and I'll never forget this.
I looked at him and I said, ohmy God, you shaved.
And you have to know, myhusband, m h, only shaved on
(22:58):
SPECIAL vspecial occasions.
I loved his beard I w was, Icalled him Grizzly grizzly Adams
and the funeral director waslike, oh, I didn't shave him.
You know, I didn't do that.
And I was like no, no, I'm notsaying that you did it, I'm
saying my husband only shaved onspecial occasions.
Rebecca (23:23):
That's incredible.
That's incredible, and that's amic drop kind of a thing, isn't
it?
Sandy (23:27):
It is, and I was just .
so.
like it took me back and I waslike wow, did he know?
You know, of course coursestill so many things are going
through my mind.
But the more that I look backand I think of things, I'm like
(23:50):
wow, I think he was telling me.
Rebecca (23:55):
Without knowing it R, make sure that this transition
(24:17):
happens in a way that is thathas information in it.
Y k that's good for everybody.
And, like you said, he didn'tshave.
He wouldn't have shaved justbecause you were coming home.
He wouldn't have shaved.
o go out to dinner, e didn'tshave, unless it was a very
special occasion like a wedding,right?
Sandy (24:35):
Absolutely.
A funny story is when my oldestdaughter got married.
Y You k know, he the nightbefore we went for the rehearsal
dinner, of course my husbandwasn't shaved up and the next
day we go to the wedding and thelady that was assisting with
the wedding said to my husband,well, who are you?
And he said, well, that's mydaughter.
(24:57):
And she was like, wow, youclean up pretty nice, and so
that was a special occasion forhim yeah, Something in him just
had to shave.
Rebecca (25:11):
Yes absolutely, nd he probably didn't have any idea
why he was shaving.
Sandy (25:15):
Nope.
Rebecca (25:15):
B So I think that it's the little things like that that
have the biggest messages forus, that he probably didn't
consciously know he was going topass, but something in him
(25:36):
shaved.
Sandy (25:38):
Yes.
Rebecca (25:39):
And I find this so often.
You know that these little bitsof honey, these little pieces
of information are there justlike hints for us, so that we
something in us can remember.
e're not ever doing this aloneand it's not ever out of order.
It's not always necessarilyeasy, but didn't that help?
(26:01):
You put, I mean like you.
You said you had to see him,like you were so fried at this
point because of everything thathad been going on, because here
you are with your son, but youstill have estates to take care
of and things like that, sothere's still life.
And then this happens with yourhusband.
You're, y just sort of at theend of your your rope at that
(26:21):
point.
Yes, ll of creation knew that.
Yes, ll of creation made surethat these little signs were in
there, because when you lookedat him and saw he shaved, I bet
you felt relief.
Sandy (26:36):
I did, I was, I just was totally taken back.
Rebecca (26:42):
Because, yeah, it's such a big thing L you can't
deny that, you know, like hedidn't shave for any other
reason ever than somethingreally really big, and so
something in him knew thatsomething big was coming.
Yes, nd didn't you say that h h?
Sandy (27:13):
c conversation.
, husband loved to take gunsafterwards, fix them husband,
clean them.
And a good o friend of c ours dhad b been at the house the
night before and you know theywere sitting there talking and
we have a room, what we call thegun room per se, and he said he
took me up there and showed meeverything and was y like k this
(27:37):
one goes to this grandchild,this one goes ttle room, room
this grandchild, this one goesto this grandchild.
And was naming each of thegrandchildren and what was
supposed to go to them.
one e
Rebecca (27:48):
Just ironically, which there no coincidences
coincidence R.
Sandy (27:52):
And when he told me that, I just was like, s t b, I just
was like, wow, why would he, y k, do this, why would he show him
this and make sure that thekids get these?
Rebecca (28:11):
And I think it shows how intuitive we all are and we
don't realize it, because I'msure he was guided, something in
him was queuing all that upwithout his conscious thought
about it, you know, queuing up aconversation with this friend
(28:33):
and showing him, y k, this gungoes to this kid, this one goes
to this one, and then shaving aj these things that are so
perfectly synchronized and fullof meaning need to be looked at,
y k, need to be paid attentionto, because that's what helps us
understand and believe thatthere's more to all of us than
(28:56):
what we see in this everydaylife that we're in, and that
life, the stuff of life, doesn'thappen by accident.
You know, it's not like thingsare meant to be.
It's not like people think.
nyway, we are meant to come into have a life because we chose
to.
We're meant to leave when weleave, because that's part of
(29:16):
what we design for ourselves.
We k, W, n my belief, we decideto come into an incarnation.
We decide the particulars ofthe people we'll be associated
with.
We sort of all plan this out toan extent, but not down to the
very last detail.
We know the mile markers.
We also know the focus of whatwe're coming in, like, how we
(29:38):
want to expand in this life andw w b g, what would be the good
scenarios for that, what kind ofpersonality would be helpful,
what type of body, all that kindof stuff.
And then we have this free will.
So we get to do this any way wewant to.
But there are going to be thosemile markers that are going to
synchronize up.
And then, because of what we'reexperiencing here and how we
(30:03):
perceive it and the thoughts wehave about it, everything is
being intermingled like,synchronized, beautifully.
If we would just stand back andlook at it from like a bird's
eye view or they look throughthe eyes of source, look at it
from a broader perspective wecan see the things that are in
(30:23):
there to help us through.
Yes, because without some ofthe things that you talked about
, it would have been so muchmore difficult for you and
confusing.
Sandy (30:33):
And you know, a lot of people said to me like how, how
did you get through it?
How are you getting through it?
You know, I look back and I sayyou know, we're never promised
tomorrow.
I just look back and see somany different things and say
(30:54):
wow.
Rebecca (30:56):
L w.
So that's one of the t o o tmain reasons why I do this
podcast, because I've learned tonot take life so seriously and
to not take death seriously andto look for the good stuff
that's there and that's why Ilike to call it the honey,
because honey is sweet and it'sprecious, because this planet
(31:19):
doesn't survive without bees whomake the honey.
They make the good stuff.
It's just sprinkled everywhere,But we've b for the most part.
W been taught to fall apartwhen things happen in a way, we
don't want them to happen or wethink isn't a good experience.
Sandy (31:40):
I think too, and I tell everybody this it's a lifestyle
change.
Rebecca (31:45):
Yeah.
Sandy (31:46):
You know it's it's you know how you watch TV, how you
cook it's.
It's a whole lifestyle changetoo.
Rebecca (31:54):
It is and we came here for that variety.
That's the, that's the nicepart about it.
We didn't come here to havesame same same, live ive forever
othing Nothing changes.
We would be bored with that andthere's no real expansion that
comes from that Y k know n inorder for eternity to be eternal
, we have to be thinking newthoughts, we have to be having
(32:15):
new experiences.
Things have to change and lifeshows us that our whole entire
lives.
We see pets come and go, we seeflowers come and go, we see all
kinds of change happening andthings dying off and renewing
and back and forth.
And that's supposed to help usget used to the fact that our
(32:36):
lives are going to change andthat people are going to come
and go.
We are going to come and go andthe more we understand that and
just relax about it, then wewill be able to see a broader
view of what's really going on.
Because we could look at whatyour son went through.
You know, and I'm sure peoplearound you said that's a tragedy
(33:00):
.
That has to be hard for you.
How are you getting throughthis?
Will you survive this?
Which really doesn't help us,because that puts more
seriousness into it.
It sort of reinforces theterribleness of it.
Sandy (33:14):
?
Rebecca (33:14):
say those things, but it's just what we've been
conditioned to say and to do,instead of saying wow, like that
is a big change.
What's next?
How's it going?
What does it look like?
Where is the good stuff in it?
Because it's not like life.
Looked at your son one day andsaid well, let's just have a car
(33:37):
hit him and, you know, break uphis body a lot, and now let's
just see how he does with that.
It's not that.
It's not that he did anythingwrong that caused that.
It's just that we come here forthe variety and we come here
for the things that make us digdeep, because that's where we
get our best experientiallearning and understanding from,
(33:58):
because you're all different.
Now.
Because of all of that, yes,and didn't all of that bring you
inward more?
Absolutely.
Doesn't it make you findyourself and understand some
things about life.
I mean for sure, you know nowthat your brother's alive, your
(34:18):
husband's alive.
They're not the men that youknew here, but they're the souls
who had that role while theywere here, that you are very
connected with and you cancontinue to be connected with.
And you also know that your sonis not only okay.
He's not the same as he wasbefore the accident, not
(34:38):
physically, emotionally,mentally, spiritually or
anything else.
He's changed in all of thoseways since that day Y es nd Yes,
and that's a really, reallygood thing.
You know, from a soul'sperspective, we're okay that the
body gets broken, because we'renot the body and we know the
body knows how to rejuvenateitself and repair and heal
itself, and that we haveoperations here that can assist
(35:02):
in that.
So we're not afraid for thebody.
We're not saying those thingsshouldn't happen.
From a soul perspective, we'regetting the honey from that
stuff.
We know that we're digging deep.
We know that that kind ofcontrast is helping us to expand
and to question life even more,which is great, because when
(35:26):
your mom and your uncles, aunts,whatever, your brother, your
husband, when they die, doesn'tit make you think are they
really still alive, or have weall just been saying that?
So there's that, and then youget these little bits of
information that help you.
It's not like the other sidecomes and burns a bush for us to
(35:49):
illuminate the fact that lifecontinues on.
What they do is they sprinklelittle things along our way.
I call them breadcrumbs.
If we pick up the breadcrumbs,then we understand a little bit
more, we trust a little more, wefear a little less, and every
(36:10):
circumstance like this has bigopportunity for us to learn to
trust the divine nature of lifeand the divine order of life,
because we've been convincedthat things should go the way we
think they should go, andthat's not true.
Things are always in abeautiful divine order.
Sandy (36:33):
And it's kind of funny because yesterday my son sent me
a little chat and he was likethe song Alan Jackson when Daddy
Let Me Drive had come on theradio and kind of like a funny
story.
But my husband had an older carand when my son was like 12 or
(36:54):
13 would take him up to RIDCPark and let him sit and drive
and we used to chuckle aboutthat.
And so he was like, oh, mom,dad's saying hello to me today.
He said I wanted to show youwhat just came over the radio.
He said I was sitting herethinking about Dad and he just
(37:15):
sent me a sign telling me he'ssaying hello to me.
Rebecca (37:20):
Because oftentimes when we think about them, it's
because they were thinking aboutus first or they're sending
their thoughts in our directionat that time Because it's a fun
game for them.
It's a fun interaction to slipa little bit of something
through a little crack ofnon-resistance that we have in
(37:41):
that moment to just say I'mright here.
I'm right here and people sayto me can you tell them that I
love them, or can you tell themthat I said this or I said that?
And I always say I don't haveto tell them, you just did.
You did before the words cameout of your mouth.
They're not invading ourprivacy.
It's a whole different outlookfrom the other side.
(38:04):
But they're very aware of ourthoughts, they know where our
heart is, they know what ourstruggles are, they know what
our limitations are, they knowwhat our potentials are, and so
they're guiding us through allof this with that understanding
and it's completelyunconditional love.
(38:26):
You know, in one of the podcastepisodes in the beginning I used
an analogy of this.
Life is like we're in this biggiant living maze and
everything's changing in themaze all the time and there's a
lot going on.
There's a lot of people, a lotof stuff and when you're in a
maze you can't see it all.
So let's say you're in thismaze of life and you're making
(38:48):
your way through it, but youhave a whole slew of people that
you love, that you trust amillion percent.
You know that.
What they say, you can go by.
They have a bird's eye view.
They can see the whole maze,they see what everybody else is
up to, they see what's aroundthe corners, they see the
opportunities and the obstaclesand they are giving you say it's
(39:11):
a game show, right?
They're giving you some cluesabout when to go quicker, when
to sit down, when to bend overand tie your shoe because
something's going to fly rightin front of you and they're far
away.
You can hear them, but they'rekind of far, and so it works out
really well when you're reallittle.
Your mind's not too busy,you're not distracted too much
(39:33):
out there.
So you hear them very well.
Watch kids, they navigate verywell and then over time we
become more distracted with themaze.
Now we're more focused with themaze and what's happening in the
maze, what everybody else isdoing in the maze, what they
might not be doing, what theythink.
We're trying to figure it out.
We're trying to figure it out.
We think we're doing this alone.
(39:53):
Now it really seems like we'redoing it alone Because the more
we do that, the less we can hearthat guidance.
We tune it out withoutrealizing we're doing it because
we're so busy in our mind andso distracted with figuring out
the maze and not take life soseriously.
(40:17):
Not try to figure this life out.
We would get those impulsesthat make you show your friend
your guns and who you want toget those guns, without even
knowing it.
It's the guidance that has youjust decide you want to shave
when you don't really know whyyou're shaving, probably don't
even think about it, you justshave, you know.
(40:39):
It's that kind of stuff that wethink are our own thoughts.
Sandy (40:44):
Here's another little thing that happened to me.
My daughter had moved out ofher place that my husband and I
had owned.
So you know, we were painting.
Me and my girlfriend were downthere painting and my son had
some friends help me.
Do you know things that justneeded to be done before I could
(41:05):
get the place ready.
I was down in the basement andmy girlfriend come down and she
was like hey, did your husbandcall you pumpkin doodle?
And I looked at her and I waslike what are you talking about?
And she was like here and shehanded me a note.
(41:25):
That has to be.
I've been with my husband sinceI was 20.
So the note has to be 25 yearsold, 30.
Has to be 25 years old, 30.
And I read the note andbasically it just said you know,
there's a frozen mug in thefreezer for you.
(41:47):
You can have a beer, but leaveme one for the football game.
Now I was so taken back becausefor two days I had been down
there, you know, painting andjust doing all this physical
labor, and I was like wow.
(42:07):
So I called my son and I saidyou're not going to believe this
.
Now, mind you, we never livedin that house the cupboard that
the note was found in my husbanddid not build, so how did the
note get there?
Rebecca (42:25):
And if it was written all those years ago, somebody's
lived in that place since then,right?
Or during that period of time,right?
So if it was just randomly inthe the cupboard, somebody would
have seen it and tossed it, orwhatever and that's what I had
called my son and I told him andhe was like mom, he goes.
Sandy (42:45):
I cleaned u that cupboard .
It was nothing in that cupboardand I was like I'm telling you,
this is where she found thenote and he was like dad's just
telling you to take it easy.
Rebecca (42:57):
Yep have a beer, .
ep.
h ep, b have a beer.
You know, and this is child'splay for them.
This is easy stuff, you know.
We look at it and go.
That is incredible.
It's a little miracle thatsomething like that could happen
, that the note could just bethere all of a sudden, in really
good timing, and really goodtiming.
(43:19):
And they always tell us, like wedo that all day long, every day
, like that's not just just payattention, get easy about this
stuff.
You know, the higher we arevibrationally, in other words,
the more ease we feel, or thehappy, the more happy we are,
the more calm we are, the moreplayful we are, the more curious
(43:39):
we are.
That's where we're going to beavailable to that stuff.
That's how we can pick up onthe things that are being
offered all day long.
Sandy (43:49):
Yes.
Rebecca (43:51):
You know, guidance isn't something that comes in
spurts.
Guidance is always streamingthat comes in spurts.
Guidance is always streamingthe other side, all of creation
source always streaming, alwaysattentive, always seeing the
bigger picture and very willingto prod us along the way.
(44:14):
They never tell us what to door what not to do, and they
don't tell us definitely what'sgoing to happen and what's not
going to happen, for the mostpart, because we have the
freedom to change things.
They that's why they guide usto.
This might be a good idea foryou.
Consider this or look at this.
This will help you understandthat I'm still alive.
(44:35):
This will help you.
This will just reinforce justone more little thing, to
reinforce that I'm still here,I'm still playing.
If you play too, then we, weboth can interact better.
And so people may think I'mloony when I talk to animals or
(44:55):
birds.
I'm loony when I talk toanimals or birds or when I thank
my mother for something who isno longer physical, or whatever.
You know, when I'm just lookingat a tree and loving this tree,
people might think I'm loonyfor that, and that's fine.
That's okay, because I know forsure inside myself that
(45:17):
everything is alive andcommunicating Signs don't just
come from a note or you knowthings like that.
They come from experiences,they come from insects and you
know just these things.
That we think is I just happento look at that billboard right
(45:38):
now you know that happens to meall the time where I'll just
happen to turn my head and I seesomething that has a meaning
for me or a message for me.
Why did I just happen to turnmy head in that moment and look
exactly where I looked?
Because that's how guidanceworks.
So you see how the easier weare about it, the more we get in
the flow with it, becausethey're not pushing us to look
(46:00):
at anything or to pick up a note.
They're just just like they dofly in formation because the
guidance just is there.
It's available for them tointerpret and then interact.
(46:25):
In that way, they're notthinking and planning with each
other who's going to be at whichpart of that formation.
It's just something thatthey're flowing in the direction
of and the understanding of,and we can do that too.
The thing that trips us up iswe're logical thinkers and we're
(46:47):
more complicated thinkers,which is great I mean, that was
the design but it doesn't meanthat we can't see guidance when
it's right there or feel it,because it's not always an item
you can pick up.
Sometimes it's a sensation or athought that comes through.
So there, it's always there.
(47:07):
But the thing I encourage peopleabout you know, when somebody
passes this close to you, do thebest you can to honor the fact
that that person's journey herein the physical is done.
That's a wonderful thing.
Keep them alive in your life,but don't keep them overly alive
(47:31):
in your life, because there's areason why you're still here,
going on physically, and they'regoing on non-physically, no
different than like, forinstance, for us being very
close friends and being a bigpart of each other's lives, and
then not for quite a while,right, and now again right.
(47:53):
We sync up Because when it fits, it fits.
When it has purpose for bothparties or many parties, then it
just does.
And when it's not really, whenit's not serving us to be here
physically, it's not servinganybody else either for us to be
here physically, and that's whywe leave.
(48:14):
When we leave, because there isa greater sort of undercurrent
to all this stuff.
There's a greater expansionthat's happening here for
everything and everybody, and wedon't have all the details to
it while we're in the physical,while we're in the physical.
(48:39):
So we pay attention, weremember that, yeah, we're in
this big changing maze and ifanytime we can, on purpose, calm
ourselves down, find a way tocenter ourselves, bring our
attention back to where ourawareness is and maybe even just
sit in silence for a minute ora second, even that helps.
You know, when we look for thehoney, when we give up the
(49:05):
decision that this is a badthing and that this should
really be tearing me apart, whenwe stop doing that, I think too
.
Sandy (49:14):
y k, for our own selfish reasons.
Y k, nd I'm not sure if I'musing the right terms, but y k
we want that person herephysically.
Sure, y k, ike I said, I cookdifferent, I watch TV different.
I pay my bills different.
You know it's a lifestylechange.
Rebecca (49:33):
Yeah, and this is your time for that, because the way
it was with the both of you hereis finished.
It doesn't mean he's not stillhere, but this is time for you
to still be here physically andnot.
It's just not time for him tobe here physically, you know,
and we're all eternal.
(49:54):
So we really don't want to stayhere forever and we don't want
to keep the same relationshipsforever, but we have an instinct
to survive and I think that'sthe thing that keeps us here,
because if we didn't have aninstinct to survive, many of us
would leave, which is this the fout?
(50:16):
Second death, d.
Third death you definitelywould have been out.
So we have an instinct.
Something in us helps usremember that we can go on.
Sandy (50:26):
And a lot of people say to me oh, you're one of the
strongest people I know.
Like how, how are you gettingthrough it?
How are you doing it?
And you know, know, like I said, my brother and I used to talk
about death.
U, I b h, I'm not afraid to die.
Good.
y k I know I'm k t you know I'mI up u gonna see all my friends
(50:51):
and you know we're gonna have yk party.
And it was like even when myhusband passed, he w was like
look at, when something happensto a me, you put me in my box
and you, you put me, y, y p msomebody, I don't d want w no s
big funeral, I don't wantsomebody coming gawking at me.
I'm gone.
Yeah, you know and you know y kI y k I think a lot of people
(51:16):
were shocked by that.
But I was going by what hiswants were yeah.
Rebecca (51:23):
And I think that the more simple, the better, in my
opinion.
You know, with those of us whoare still here physically making
that adjustment, yeah, makingthat adjustment, yeah, the more
(51:43):
simple we let it be, the themore ease we put into it.
And when people say to you, howare you making it through this,
I would just say I just am,because I can.
Why are you not falling apart?
Because I don't't have to.
I can, and there were momentswhere I did, but I have to go on
.
And I t y k, I know for sure,that those on the other side
(52:08):
want us to go on and find ourjoy, to find our life.
They want us to go on and behappy.
I mean, you know for sure thatRichie would never be anywhere,
even on this physical planet,when he was still here
physically, wishing that anybodywould be miserable.
Sandy (52:26):
Right.
Rebecca (52:27):
Because t w n h.
He wouldn't have wanted thatwhen he was here.
He certainly wouldn't want itnow that he's passed, for
anybody here to be miserablebecause he is not here
physically anymore.
And we all feel that way, fromwhat they tell me on the other
side, that we all want thosethat are still here to just find
their own joy, find their love,find their life.
(52:49):
They love it when we know thatthey're still a part of it, but
they're okay when we don't knowthat too.
Sandy (53:00):
Kind of funny, because my son and I were talking and he
was like you know, mom, there'sthere's a reason why you're
still here and dad's gone.
Dad has always said yeah that Ibetter pass before mom because
I don't think I would be able tosurvive, and that's just the
way my husband was, but he sayshe knows that you would be okay.
Rebecca (53:27):
Y, y, b I think that, y k, we definitely all have it in
us to make it through.
Whatever shows up in our lives,we really do.
We can not believe that.
And then it.
Whatever shows up in our lives,we really do.
We can not believe that.
And then it doesn't look sogood, but we really do.
And even if somebody is goingthrough something with no other
people being a part of that,they're still not going through
(53:49):
it alone.
There's no such thing as goingthrough anything here alone.
We can think we are, but that'snever actually the truth.
And the more we understand that, the more we can hear the
people or the souls from thebird's eye view, you know, the
more we get the encouragement,you know, and the guidance to be
(54:09):
able to go on.
, sandy, I came really this hasbeen came a great conversation.
I came really think thatthere's came a lot of honey in
came that people came will beable to gain from your
experiences and to see that youknow you can.
Life can just come at you andcome at you, and come at you and
come at you, and then comeagain, come again, and it kept
(54:34):
getting closer to home, so tospeak.
But yet here you are, yes, andthere's your son walking around,
still having another surgery,but he's still walking around
because it's not his time to notbe here physically, and it
certainly isn't yours either.
So thank you very much fortoday.
Thank you for having me.
(54:54):
I'm so glad you came for today.
Thank you for having me, I'm soglad you came.
And to all of you out there, dothe best you can to choose
thoughts that just feel any sortof way better than the ones
that are pulling you down.
Even a little bit better ismovement in the right direction
and in the direction of healingand recovering from whatever
(55:18):
comes at you, because it's notlike life is throwing anything
at us.
This is the stuff of life.
This is what we came here for.
Sandy (55:25):
You just got to keep going forward.
Rebecca (55:28):
Yeah, it's how we grow, Keep going forward, keep
expanding, keep learning.
So you can find me atmysticaltruthscom.
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