January 10, 2024 • 36 mins
Battling with a scarcity mindset wasn't just my personal demon; it's a silent plague that afflicts countless individuals, regardless of their wealth or status. Through a journey of self-discovery and a radical shift in my internal dialogue, I've emerged with strategies that have not only transformed my outlook but also promise to reshape yours. This podcast peels back the layers of limited beliefs, unveiling how they can stealthily undermine our social interactions and personal development. With a blend of candid anecdotes and reflective insight, I guide you through the process of adopting an abundance mindset, fortified by the power of affirmations and positive self-talk. Prepare to challenge the narratives holding you back and to embrace the techniques that can spark a profound change in your life.
The path to personal growth is endlessly enriched by continuous learning and the wisdom of mentors, and this episode is dedicated to showing you how. Affirming your strengths and aspirations can sculpt a new self-image and life perspective, while education stands as the antidote to scarcity, breaking down barriers at any age and from any walk of life. This conversation extends an invitation to join a community where growth is inclusive and mentorship is transformational. As we wrap up, I leave you with a bolstered confidence and unwavering belief in your potential. You're not merely a listener; you're an integral part of this journey toward success, and I'm here, rooting for you every step of the way.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Miow in the Mix.
Today we are discussingtransitioning your lack
mentality to enhance growth.
Get your pen and pad ready.
You will have some homework todo.
If you're returning, welcomeback.
If you're new, here are a fewguidelines.
(00:21):
If this is your first timetuning in, I welcome you with
open arms to a not-so-judgmentalzone.
Just a little tough love.
If you are driving, keep bothhands on the wheel and eyes on
the road, even while laughing.
(00:42):
If there are small childrenaround, wear earbuds because I
cuss.
Hey, don't forget to listen tothis episode again.
You may have missed somethingand share with a friend.
Don't be selfish.
What a day, what a day.
(01:05):
What a day, y'all.
I am happy to be recording todaybecause, let me tell you, I was
in lack mentality.
It happens to the best of us.
Today may have been one ofthose days, but I pulled myself
(01:25):
out and I want to share with youhow you can do that too.
So, transitioning your lackmentality.
Let me say that againTransitioning your lack
mentality to enhance growth.
(01:46):
Now just a little storyline tobefore we get into our homework.
Each and every one of us haslack mentality.
I don't care what your statusis, I don't care how much money
(02:08):
you make, I don't care if you'rethe matriarch of your family, I
don't care.
Everyone that has a pulse has aform of lack mentality, whether
(02:34):
you wish to believe it or not.
And in today's discussion we'regoing to touch on three
different ways that you can helpyourself get over this lack
mentality.
We hope that you enhance yourgrowth while doing these things.
(02:57):
And let me tell you, it is noteasy.
It is not easy at all.
It's not easy to recognize whenyou're in a lack mentality
state.
It's not easy to pull yourselfup out of it, and it damn sure
isn't easy when you have otherpeople pointed out to you.
(03:19):
So now that we got thatnegative ball out of the way, I
want to look at what can we dohere to pull ourselves out of it
and grow from it.
So usually when people have alack mentality, they don't know,
(03:51):
because they're just goingabout life every single day with
the same old woes that they'reused to.
I recall not understanding whatthe health lack mentality was.
I didn't grow up with talkingabout stuff like this.
(04:15):
I, you know, no one ever put itin my face to say you know
you're suffering from a lackmentality.
You are.
You need some assistance withthat.
You need to think differently.
I didn't have thoseconversations growing up and I
(04:36):
did not have those conversationsearly on in my young adulthood.
They just did not exist.
So this brings me to say youmay wonder how the heck did I
come up with this, or notice orrecognize that I have a lack
(05:01):
mentality?
Well, the term.
I didn't even understand ituntil maybe 10, 15 years ago or
just a little bit before then.
Lack mentality can hit us in anyarea of our lives.
(05:24):
It's not just in the financialsector or in our pockets.
Most people and this is myopinion okay, everything that I
talk about is my opinion.
Your opinion may be totallydifferent, and that is fine and
I respect it, but understand so,if you're listening to me,
(05:47):
you're getting my opinion.
I don't mind if you voice youropinion to me, and I'm giving
you a way to do that Look downin the description box.
Okay, now I was on a roll andtook the other part of me jumped
(06:07):
in.
That's a lack mentality,because I lack the tools to
regain the thoughts that Ipreviously had.
I'm going to be okay.
Oh Lord, getting old is rough.
So let's go back.
Lack mentality when I discoveredthat it's not a term that, of
(06:34):
course, that I came up with.
It's been around forever, butthe fact that it even existed, I
didn't learn that until lateron, when I was well into my
adulthood, and I feel that I wasin denial.
It's like the first thing whenyou find out that you have a
(06:55):
lack mentality.
You're in denial and you'relike, no, I don't, I don't have
that, just like anything else.
When you don't have somethingwhere you like it, you're in
denial.
And when I finally faced it, itwas like what do I do to
overcome this lack mentality,the lack thereof, of course,
(07:20):
finance, the lack thereof socialskills that would connect me to
other individuals that wouldhelp me grow, and I had to
really overcome this.
And YouTube wasn't that big forme back then.
But I said you know what I gotto find something.
(07:42):
So I write books, I did theYouTube thing.
And then I sat myself down andrealized the way that I talk to
myself Was very negative.
So the number one thing that Isay I had to do was start to
(08:06):
look within and figure outwhat's wrong and how do I fix
that.
So I started to dig deeper intomy past of me.
You know, when I was a child,what happened to me?
What did I go through?
What am I missing?
What did my scene?
(08:28):
Why do I talk to myself soharshly and do I talk to other
people like that?
I started questioning mybehavior and in questioning my
behavior, I was able to turnthings around and come up with
(08:53):
at least something to start with.
You know it's like a starterplate, so let's talk about it.
Number one what can you do fortransitioning your lack or your
mentality?
How can I say the lackmentality to enhance growth?
So, transitioning your lackmentality to enhance growth.
(09:17):
The first thing you can do isaffirmations.
Don't sit down below.
Oh boy, here we go, she'stalking.
Affirmations.
Listen, the way you talk toyourself is important.
If you call yourself stupidevery day, 14 times a day,
(09:38):
you're going to start to believeyou're stupid.
It's not a positive thing, it'snot healthy.
Would you tell your childrenthey're stupid?
And if you do tell yourchildren you're stupid, news
flash you the stupid one.
You wouldn't want to talk toyour children like that.
You don't want someone elsetalking to you like that.
So why would you talk toyourself like that?
(10:02):
That's what you have to look at.
Start incorporating positiveaffirmations into your life.
I am smart, I am healthy, I amstrong, I am whatever a unicorn,
I am a dolphin, I am a turtle.
(10:22):
Whatever you want to be, I am acollege graduate, even if
school is hard for you.
I'm a straight A student.
I'm a straight B student.
Whatever you're looking toachieve, I'm a millionaire, I'm
an entrepreneur, I'm an artist,I'm a writer.
(10:44):
Start making healthy decisionsof how you should speak to
yourself.
So that's number oneAffirmations.
Let's talk about the secondthing.
When you lack knowledge, youhave a lack mentality.
(11:10):
When you lack knowledge, youhave a lack mentality.
As many say, you should neverbe the smartest person in the
room.
If you're the smartest personin the room, who are you going
(11:31):
to learn from?
And each and every person canlearn from someone, no matter
how old they are, what ethnicitythey are.
If there's a language barrier,if there's an educational
barrier, I believe you can stilllearn from each and every
(11:58):
person you encounter.
So, number two educatingyourself on the subject that you
feel you lack knowledge in canhelp you grow.
It doesn't matter what it is.
(12:20):
It doesn't matter how old youare.
Putting your needs first as faras what you need to do in order
to bring yourself out of thatlack is what should be one of
(12:41):
your number one reasons forgetting up in the morning and
educating yourself on aparticular subject that you find
doesn't come easy to you isdefinitely, definitely something
(13:02):
that you can do to help you intransitioning that lack
mentality.
Understand that there are goingto be so many more steps to
this.
I'm only giving you three.
Have this conversation with yourfriends, family members, your
(13:26):
children, your spouse, yourpartner, hell.
Have the conversation with thepeople in the dentist's office,
your doctor.
You would be surprised how youcan connect to other individuals
(13:48):
when you have true, fullconversations that have weight
in reality that others arefacing.
Just because someone has adegree or a PhD does not mean
(14:09):
that they are smarter than youor dumber than you Okay, it goes
both ways and it doesn't meanthat you don't have knowledge
that you can share with them.
You can conduct a healthy,healing conversation to or with
(14:33):
anyone, even a five year old, athree year old, a two year old,
it doesn't matter.
You have something to offer andthey have something to offer.
You have these conversations.
Be honest.
It's not like you're bearingyour complete soul.
(14:57):
I'm not saying give them yourwhole history on all the things
you lack in life.
So then you turn around feelinglike a loser for the rest of
the day.
I'm not saying that.
I'm saying engage inconversation about some of these
things, about some of thesetopics we've talked about for
(15:20):
the last two plus years.
It helps to educate yourself andthe party that you're engaging
with in these conversations.
No, it's not going to be easy.
Yes, it means you have to be asocial, a little bit of an
(15:40):
extrovert Heck, I know I don'tlike to do it.
But once you start you kind ofget comfortable, not with each
and every person out there, butonce you find the person you can
connect with, that's seriousabout the conversation and
you're talking and you'relaughing and you're connecting
(16:00):
and you're bonding, you'reenhancing your growth because
somewhere there's a small seedthat you've planted in yourself
and in that other person andthey've done the same.
They planted a seed inthemselves and into you which
(16:22):
now causes you to go out andseek more information in
something else or in a spacewhere you said I want to learn,
I want to learn a little bitmore about that.
Spark these conversations tohelp you grow.
You don't always have to just goread the book or go to the
(16:45):
class.
Having conversations with otherindividuals is part of
educating yourself.
Don't underestimate the little,small parts of education, and
(17:06):
when I say that I mean whetheryou're reading a magazine or a
book, or you go to a therapist,or you're having that small
conversation with the postman orpostwoman, you know, or the
person that stopped you in thestreet to ask you about your
shoes, or you know.
(17:26):
It's just little things.
You have to figure out how thatconnects to you in your lack
mentality.
Maybe you lack those socialskills and you find it hard to
interact with other individuals.
It causes you anxiety.
There's a lack there.
(17:48):
That's a challenge.
Transitioning your lackmentality to enhance growth is a
challenge, and it's not justyour challenge, it's a challenge
(18:12):
that everyone encounters.
So think about it.
Think about what you can do tohelp yourself.
Not what other episode iscoming on, one of the Witcher.
(18:34):
I mean, that's what I'm goingto do to help myself unwind.
But it's like what can you doto expand and grow in order to
move up to where you want to be?
Do you even know where you wantto be?
(18:55):
If you don't know where youwant to be.
How can you find out how toexpand on that?
Maybe the subject of who am I?
Maybe you need to do that andthen start to educate yourself
(19:19):
on who you are.
There are so many things in somany ways that you can come out
of this lack.
It's just take time to thinkabout it.
Each one of these steps I'vedone numerous times, as I always
(19:43):
tell you, it doesn't get anyeasier.
Life is very complicated and,out of all of our frustrations,
when it gets quiet in thebedroom and we're alone, that's
(20:06):
when all of these things come upwhat you lack, what you don't
have.
Take a pen and a piece of paper, keep it with you, a small
notebook, something that issmall, where you don't have to
(20:26):
make long ass paragraphs, butyou can digest a little bit of
information when you discoverthat you have a lack in
something.
Let's move on.
Number three seeking a mentor.
(20:53):
It sounds very easy and verydifficult at the same time.
Seeking a mentor can be veryscary and I want to say and be
(21:15):
so transparent with you I stilldon't technically have a mentor.
It is very hard to find someonethat wants to take their time
and give it to you without thebiggest damn ticket price
(21:39):
attached to it.
When you can't trade onsomething, it can be hard
Meaning when they don't want youto do something for them but
pay them.
So mentorship isn't easy.
(22:02):
It's not that you can't comeacross a mentor.
It may be the mentor thatyou're really looking for.
I want to say don't let thatstop you.
I'm not letting it stop me Inplaces of, or I should say in
(22:22):
the place of, the mentor thatI'm now looking for.
I've used people from YouTubeand I've followed in those ways
Not necessarily followed,because that's something big,
(22:45):
but I've taken bits and piecesof lessons learned that they
were willing to share.
And sometimes you email and youconnect with people.
I don't have a mentor right now.
What do I have?
A mentor through books, amentor through email, and
(23:08):
sometimes that's all you reallyneed, but sometimes to have live
feedback, you find someone thathas already been through what
you're going through thathopefully shares the same morals
and values, not down to a T,but similar.
(23:32):
I will also say be careful withwhom you seek mentorship with,
because I would say thisself-explanatory, but that's not
true.
Be careful who you seekmentorship with, because you
(23:56):
might be wrapped up in.
I think it's idolizationinstead of realization.
The person that you'rerequesting to mentor you is a
human.
They have feelings, theemotions or they can be
(24:18):
emotional.
They can be arrogant.
They can be everything that youthought that they would never
be.
So I want you to remember whenyou select your mentor they are
a person.
Don't have too many highexpectations of them.
(24:40):
They are flawed, just like youare, just like I am.
They cannot be your superhero.
They are there to help youunderstand how they got where
they are and what you canpossibly incorporate into your
(25:02):
world.
They are not there to give youall the secrets, because they
don't have all the answers.
You may need three and fourmentors.
You may not need any.
You may need to just face yourown damn music.
(25:25):
And you know like my lackmentality comes because I'm a
procrastinator.
I spent four hours bingewatching a TV show instead of
working on my budgeting for mycompany or writing my essay, or
(25:50):
cleaning my house, or, or, or.
It could be so many things.
Just remember, don't glorifythe mentor.
(26:15):
The mentor is there for guidance, not necessarily full on
support, but guidance,intellectual guidance.
You're trying to learnsomething, you're trying to gain
(26:36):
knowledge of a particularindustry or subject, and that's
what it is.
That's all it is.
And just because it worked foryour mentor, does it mean it's
going to work for you.
You need to take what you canuse and leave the rest.
Don't fault your mentor becauseshe didn't work out for you.
(27:01):
And I will repeat that Don'tfault your mentor because she
didn't work out for you.
Instead, find another way, getanother mentor.
Before you get another mentor,you ask the current one.
(27:26):
What am I missing?
Is there something I'm notdoing?
Because they may have theperfect answer for you.
And when I speak of mentor, I'malso speaking about the
therapist, the psychiatrist, theparent.
(27:54):
Your mentor could be anyone andeveryone the person in the room
that has more knowledge than you, the person in the room that
you look up to and respect inthat particular subject.
(28:17):
They are hot damn mess they are.
You lose all respect for them.
You forgot the main purpose.
You're there to learn somethingfrom them in a particular
subject, not walk a mile intheir shoes.
So just remember what theassignment is.
(28:47):
Listen, I set up here and I gavey'all three of them.
I'm trying to do a little bitbetter with shows.
I'm going to do a little recap,real quick for you guys, and
then I'm going to say Sayonara,so I hope you've been paying
attention and listening.
(29:08):
So here is the recap and thenyour homework.
Okay, so, transitioning yourlack mentality to enhance growth
One affirmations.
Two, educating yourself on thesubject.
(29:31):
And three, seeking a mentor.
Those are three of the thingsthat I've done not the only
things I've done in order toovercome my lack mentality.
It is not easy and it is anongoing process.
(29:57):
I face it every day, I fightwith it every day because, hell,
I'm human.
Every damn day, despite whatsome people think, I am human.
So, with that being said, Iwant to say your homework is yes
(30:20):
, I was not going to forget, Iwas not going to forget.
Your homework is to sit down ina quiet space with a notepad and
think what is it that you lack?
(30:44):
Are you always fussing aboutthe bills?
Are you nervous when it comestime to speak in front of a
group?
Do you not understand interest?
(31:07):
What is it that you lack?
Maybe your vocabulary is notwhere you want it to be.
(31:28):
I used to think that way and Isaid the hell with that.
I'm good, I'll learn new words.
That's not really what I'mconcerned about in life, but you
may be in a position where youneed to up your vocabulary.
(31:49):
Well, how are you going to dothat Instead of shrinking down
in your seat every time someonesays a 20 letter word, which
could have probably been saidwith a 3, 4, or 5 letter word?
(32:10):
But don't get me started.
But every time someone says oneof these big ass words, you
start shaking in your boots.
I used to be like that until Iturned around and said I don't
know what you're talking about,or I just wait until the end and
be like what does that mean?
What does that mean?
Because I know somebody else inthe room don't know what the
(32:33):
hell that person is talkingabout either, and then to come
find out they could have used alittle ass word and we could
have just kept moving.
But no, let's see.
Oh gosh, oh gosh.
Anyway, I was going off on arant.
I'm trying to catch myself.
Y'all do better for you.
(32:55):
I'm trying, but I still got tobe me.
So that's your homework.
Get a notepad, sit in a quietroom, think about what you lack
and what you would like to do togrow in a particular area, or
(33:18):
what area you want to grow in.
Maybe you want to read morebooks just so you can have a
sense of creativity at Spark.
Start with something small.
Don't try to get like a 600page book.
I think you're going to want it, you're going to be.
You know you're going to finishthat book, because when you
(33:38):
don't finish it you're going tofeel like a failure and say what
the hell?
What am I thinking?
Get a small book, read it, buildyour way up, help, destroy that
lack mentality.
Say a few affirmations beforeyou read it.
Do what you got to do.
(33:59):
I believe in you, just believein yourself.
All right, guys.
On that note, I want to saythank you.
I appreciate you.
Don't forget to subscribe tothe channel If you'd like to
donate to the show, I can use acup of coffee, a cup of tea, not
a donut, unless it's glutenfree.
(34:20):
All right, guys, I appreciateyou.
I will see you next week.
You're wonderful, you'reintelligent, you're sexy and you
got this.
Love you guys.
Talk to you later.
Welcome to Miow in the Mix.
Today we are discussingtransitioning your lack
mentality to enhance growth.
Get your pen and pad ready.
You will have some homework todo.
If you're returning, welcomeback.
If you're new, here are a fewguidelines.
(00:21):
If this is your first timetuning in, I welcome you with
open arms to a not-so-judgmentalzone.
Just a little tough love.
If you are driving, keep bothhands on the wheel and eyes on
the road, even while laughing.
(00:42):
If there are small childrenaround, wear earbuds because I
cuss.
Hey, don't forget to listen tothis episode again.
You may have missed somethingand share with a friend.
Don't be selfish.
What a day, what a day.
(01:05):
What a day, y'all.
I am happy to be recording todaybecause, let me tell you, I was
in lack mentality.
It happens to the best of us.
Today may have been one ofthose days, but I pulled myself
(01:25):
out and I want to share with youhow you can do that too.
So, transitioning your lackmentality.
Let me say that againTransitioning your lack
mentality to enhance growth.
(01:46):
Now just a little storyline tobefore we get into our homework.
Each and every one of us haslack mentality.
I don't care what your statusis, I don't care how much money
(02:08):
you make, I don't care if you'rethe matriarch of your family, I
don't care.
Everyone that has a pulse has aform of lack mentality, whether
(02:34):
you wish to believe it or not.
And in today's discussion we'regoing to touch on three
different ways that you can helpyourself get over this lack
mentality.
We hope that you enhance yourgrowth while doing these things.
(02:57):
And let me tell you, it is noteasy.
It is not easy at all.
It's not easy to recognize whenyou're in a lack mentality
state.
It's not easy to pull yourselfup out of it, and it damn sure
isn't easy when you have otherpeople pointed out to you.
(03:19):
So now that we got thatnegative ball out of the way, I
want to look at what can we dohere to pull ourselves out of it
and grow from it.
So usually when people have alack mentality, they don't know,
(03:51):
because they're just goingabout life every single day with
the same old woes that they'reused to.
I recall not understanding whatthe health lack mentality was.
I didn't grow up with talkingabout stuff like this.
(04:15):
I, you know, no one ever put itin my face to say you know
you're suffering from a lackmentality.
You are.
You need some assistance withthat.
You need to think differently.
I didn't have thoseconversations growing up and I
(04:36):
did not have those conversationsearly on in my young adulthood.
They just did not exist.
So this brings me to say youmay wonder how the heck did I
come up with this, or notice orrecognize that I have a lack
(05:01):
mentality?
Well, the term.
I didn't even understand ituntil maybe 10, 15 years ago or
just a little bit before then.
Lack mentality can hit us in anyarea of our lives.
(05:24):
It's not just in the financialsector or in our pockets.
Most people and this is myopinion okay, everything that I
talk about is my opinion.
Your opinion may be totallydifferent, and that is fine and
I respect it, but understand so,if you're listening to me,
(05:47):
you're getting my opinion.
I don't mind if you voice youropinion to me, and I'm giving
you a way to do that Look downin the description box.
Okay, now I was on a roll andtook the other part of me jumped
(06:07):
in.
That's a lack mentality,because I lack the tools to
regain the thoughts that Ipreviously had.
I'm going to be okay.
Oh Lord, getting old is rough.
So let's go back.
Lack mentality when I discoveredthat it's not a term that, of
(06:34):
course, that I came up with.
It's been around forever, butthe fact that it even existed, I
didn't learn that until lateron, when I was well into my
adulthood, and I feel that I wasin denial.
It's like the first thing whenyou find out that you have a
(06:55):
lack mentality.
You're in denial and you'relike, no, I don't, I don't have
that, just like anything else.
When you don't have somethingwhere you like it, you're in
denial.
And when I finally faced it, itwas like what do I do to
overcome this lack mentality,the lack thereof, of course,
(07:20):
finance, the lack thereof socialskills that would connect me to
other individuals that wouldhelp me grow, and I had to
really overcome this.
And YouTube wasn't that big forme back then.
But I said you know what I gotto find something.
(07:42):
So I write books, I did theYouTube thing.
And then I sat myself down andrealized the way that I talk to
myself Was very negative.
So the number one thing that Isay I had to do was start to
(08:06):
look within and figure outwhat's wrong and how do I fix
that.
So I started to dig deeper intomy past of me.
You know, when I was a child,what happened to me?
What did I go through?
What am I missing?
What did my scene?
(08:28):
Why do I talk to myself soharshly and do I talk to other
people like that?
I started questioning mybehavior and in questioning my
behavior, I was able to turnthings around and come up with
(08:53):
at least something to start with.
You know it's like a starterplate, so let's talk about it.
Number one what can you do fortransitioning your lack or your
mentality?
How can I say the lackmentality to enhance growth?
So, transitioning your lackmentality to enhance growth.
(09:17):
The first thing you can do isaffirmations.
Don't sit down below.
Oh boy, here we go, she'stalking.
Affirmations.
Listen, the way you talk toyourself is important.
If you call yourself stupidevery day, 14 times a day,
(09:38):
you're going to start to believeyou're stupid.
It's not a positive thing, it'snot healthy.
Would you tell your childrenthey're stupid?
And if you do tell yourchildren you're stupid, news
flash you the stupid one.
You wouldn't want to talk toyour children like that.
You don't want someone elsetalking to you like that.
So why would you talk toyourself like that?
(10:02):
That's what you have to look at.
Start incorporating positiveaffirmations into your life.
I am smart, I am healthy, I amstrong, I am whatever a unicorn,
I am a dolphin, I am a turtle.
(10:22):
Whatever you want to be, I am acollege graduate, even if
school is hard for you.
I'm a straight A student.
I'm a straight B student.
Whatever you're looking toachieve, I'm a millionaire, I'm
an entrepreneur, I'm an artist,I'm a writer.
(10:44):
Start making healthy decisionsof how you should speak to
yourself.
So that's number oneAffirmations.
Let's talk about the secondthing.
When you lack knowledge, youhave a lack mentality.
(11:10):
When you lack knowledge, youhave a lack mentality.
As many say, you should neverbe the smartest person in the
room.
If you're the smartest personin the room, who are you going
(11:31):
to learn from?
And each and every person canlearn from someone, no matter
how old they are, what ethnicitythey are.
If there's a language barrier,if there's an educational
barrier, I believe you can stilllearn from each and every
(11:58):
person you encounter.
So, number two educatingyourself on the subject that you
feel you lack knowledge in canhelp you grow.
It doesn't matter what it is.
(12:20):
It doesn't matter how old youare.
Putting your needs first as faras what you need to do in order
to bring yourself out of thatlack is what should be one of
(12:41):
your number one reasons forgetting up in the morning and
educating yourself on aparticular subject that you find
doesn't come easy to you isdefinitely, definitely something
(13:02):
that you can do to help you intransitioning that lack
mentality.
Understand that there are goingto be so many more steps to
this.
I'm only giving you three.
Have this conversation with yourfriends, family members, your
(13:26):
children, your spouse, yourpartner, hell.
Have the conversation with thepeople in the dentist's office,
your doctor.
You would be surprised how youcan connect to other individuals
(13:48):
when you have true, fullconversations that have weight
in reality that others arefacing.
Just because someone has adegree or a PhD does not mean
(14:09):
that they are smarter than youor dumber than you Okay, it goes
both ways and it doesn't meanthat you don't have knowledge
that you can share with them.
You can conduct a healthy,healing conversation to or with
(14:33):
anyone, even a five year old, athree year old, a two year old,
it doesn't matter.
You have something to offer andthey have something to offer.
You have these conversations.
Be honest.
It's not like you're bearingyour complete soul.
(14:57):
I'm not saying give them yourwhole history on all the things
you lack in life.
So then you turn around feelinglike a loser for the rest of
the day.
I'm not saying that.
I'm saying engage inconversation about some of these
things, about some of thesetopics we've talked about for
(15:20):
the last two plus years.
It helps to educate yourself andthe party that you're engaging
with in these conversations.
No, it's not going to be easy.
Yes, it means you have to be asocial, a little bit of an
(15:40):
extrovert Heck, I know I don'tlike to do it.
But once you start you kind ofget comfortable, not with each
and every person out there, butonce you find the person you can
connect with, that's seriousabout the conversation and
you're talking and you'relaughing and you're connecting
(16:00):
and you're bonding, you'reenhancing your growth because
somewhere there's a small seedthat you've planted in yourself
and in that other person andthey've done the same.
They planted a seed inthemselves and into you which
(16:22):
now causes you to go out andseek more information in
something else or in a spacewhere you said I want to learn,
I want to learn a little bitmore about that.
Spark these conversations tohelp you grow.
You don't always have to just goread the book or go to the
(16:45):
class.
Having conversations with otherindividuals is part of
educating yourself.
Don't underestimate the little,small parts of education, and
(17:06):
when I say that I mean whetheryou're reading a magazine or a
book, or you go to a therapist,or you're having that small
conversation with the postman orpostwoman, you know, or the
person that stopped you in thestreet to ask you about your
shoes, or you know.
(17:26):
It's just little things.
You have to figure out how thatconnects to you in your lack
mentality.
Maybe you lack those socialskills and you find it hard to
interact with other individuals.
It causes you anxiety.
There's a lack there.
(17:48):
That's a challenge.
Transitioning your lackmentality to enhance growth is a
challenge, and it's not justyour challenge, it's a challenge
(18:12):
that everyone encounters.
So think about it.
Think about what you can do tohelp yourself.
Not what other episode iscoming on, one of the Witcher.
(18:34):
I mean, that's what I'm goingto do to help myself unwind.
But it's like what can you doto expand and grow in order to
move up to where you want to be?
Do you even know where you wantto be?
(18:55):
If you don't know where youwant to be.
How can you find out how toexpand on that?
Maybe the subject of who am I?
Maybe you need to do that andthen start to educate yourself
(19:19):
on who you are.
There are so many things in somany ways that you can come out
of this lack.
It's just take time to thinkabout it.
Each one of these steps I'vedone numerous times, as I always
(19:43):
tell you, it doesn't get anyeasier.
Life is very complicated and,out of all of our frustrations,
when it gets quiet in thebedroom and we're alone, that's
(20:06):
when all of these things come upwhat you lack, what you don't
have.
Take a pen and a piece of paper, keep it with you, a small
notebook, something that issmall, where you don't have to
(20:26):
make long ass paragraphs, butyou can digest a little bit of
information when you discoverthat you have a lack in
something.
Let's move on.
Number three seeking a mentor.
(20:53):
It sounds very easy and verydifficult at the same time.
Seeking a mentor can be veryscary and I want to say and be
(21:15):
so transparent with you I stilldon't technically have a mentor.
It is very hard to find someonethat wants to take their time
and give it to you without thebiggest damn ticket price
(21:39):
attached to it.
When you can't trade onsomething, it can be hard
Meaning when they don't want youto do something for them but
pay them.
So mentorship isn't easy.
(22:02):
It's not that you can't comeacross a mentor.
It may be the mentor thatyou're really looking for.
I want to say don't let thatstop you.
I'm not letting it stop me Inplaces of, or I should say in
(22:22):
the place of, the mentor thatI'm now looking for.
I've used people from YouTubeand I've followed in those ways
Not necessarily followed,because that's something big,
(22:45):
but I've taken bits and piecesof lessons learned that they
were willing to share.
And sometimes you email and youconnect with people.
I don't have a mentor right now.
What do I have?
A mentor through books, amentor through email, and
(23:08):
sometimes that's all you reallyneed, but sometimes to have live
feedback, you find someone thathas already been through what
you're going through thathopefully shares the same morals
and values, not down to a T,but similar.
(23:32):
I will also say be careful withwhom you seek mentorship with,
because I would say thisself-explanatory, but that's not
true.
Be careful who you seekmentorship with, because you
(23:56):
might be wrapped up in.
I think it's idolizationinstead of realization.
The person that you'rerequesting to mentor you is a
human.
They have feelings, theemotions or they can be
(24:18):
emotional.
They can be arrogant.
They can be everything that youthought that they would never
be.
So I want you to remember whenyou select your mentor they are
a person.
Don't have too many highexpectations of them.
(24:40):
They are flawed, just like youare, just like I am.
They cannot be your superhero.
They are there to help youunderstand how they got where
they are and what you canpossibly incorporate into your
(25:02):
world.
They are not there to give youall the secrets, because they
don't have all the answers.
You may need three and fourmentors.
You may not need any.
You may need to just face yourown damn music.
(25:25):
And you know like my lackmentality comes because I'm a
procrastinator.
I spent four hours bingewatching a TV show instead of
working on my budgeting for mycompany or writing my essay, or
(25:50):
cleaning my house, or, or, or.
It could be so many things.
Just remember, don't glorifythe mentor.
(26:15):
The mentor is there for guidance, not necessarily full on
support, but guidance,intellectual guidance.
You're trying to learnsomething, you're trying to gain
(26:36):
knowledge of a particularindustry or subject, and that's
what it is.
That's all it is.
And just because it worked foryour mentor, does it mean it's
going to work for you.
You need to take what you canuse and leave the rest.
Don't fault your mentor becauseshe didn't work out for you.
(27:01):
And I will repeat that Don'tfault your mentor because she
didn't work out for you.
Instead, find another way, getanother mentor.
Before you get another mentor,you ask the current one.
(27:26):
What am I missing?
Is there something I'm notdoing?
Because they may have theperfect answer for you.
And when I speak of mentor, I'malso speaking about the
therapist, the psychiatrist, theparent.
(27:54):
Your mentor could be anyone andeveryone the person in the room
that has more knowledge than you, the person in the room that
you look up to and respect inthat particular subject.
(28:17):
They are hot damn mess they are.
You lose all respect for them.
You forgot the main purpose.
You're there to learn somethingfrom them in a particular
subject, not walk a mile intheir shoes.
So just remember what theassignment is.
(28:47):
Listen, I set up here and I gavey'all three of them.
I'm trying to do a little bitbetter with shows.
I'm going to do a little recap,real quick for you guys, and
then I'm going to say Sayonara,so I hope you've been paying
attention and listening.
(29:08):
So here is the recap and thenyour homework.
Okay, so, transitioning yourlack mentality to enhance growth
One affirmations.
Two, educating yourself on thesubject.
(29:31):
And three, seeking a mentor.
Those are three of the thingsthat I've done not the only
things I've done in order toovercome my lack mentality.
It is not easy and it is anongoing process.
(29:57):
I face it every day, I fightwith it every day because, hell,
I'm human.
Every damn day, despite whatsome people think, I am human.
So, with that being said, Iwant to say your homework is yes
(30:20):
, I was not going to forget, Iwas not going to forget.
Your homework is to sit down ina quiet space with a notepad and
think what is it that you lack?
(30:44):
Are you always fussing aboutthe bills?
Are you nervous when it comestime to speak in front of a
group?
Do you not understand interest?
(31:07):
What is it that you lack?
Maybe your vocabulary is notwhere you want it to be.
(31:28):
I used to think that way and Isaid the hell with that.
I'm good, I'll learn new words.
That's not really what I'mconcerned about in life, but you
may be in a position where youneed to up your vocabulary.
(31:49):
Well, how are you going to dothat Instead of shrinking down
in your seat every time someonesays a 20 letter word, which
could have probably been saidwith a 3, 4, or 5 letter word?
(32:10):
But don't get me started.
But every time someone says oneof these big ass words, you
start shaking in your boots.
I used to be like that until Iturned around and said I don't
know what you're talking about,or I just wait until the end and
be like what does that mean?
What does that mean?
Because I know somebody else inthe room don't know what the
(32:33):
hell that person is talkingabout either, and then to come
find out they could have used alittle ass word and we could
have just kept moving.
But no, let's see.
Oh gosh, oh gosh.
Anyway, I was going off on arant.
I'm trying to catch myself.
Y'all do better for you.
(32:55):
I'm trying, but I still got tobe me.
So that's your homework.
Get a notepad, sit in a quietroom, think about what you lack
and what you would like to do togrow in a particular area, or
(33:18):
what area you want to grow in.
Maybe you want to read morebooks just so you can have a
sense of creativity at Spark.
Start with something small.
Don't try to get like a 600page book.
I think you're going to want it, you're going to be.
You know you're going to finishthat book, because when you
(33:38):
don't finish it you're going tofeel like a failure and say what
the hell?
What am I thinking?
Get a small book, read it, buildyour way up, help, destroy that
lack mentality.
Say a few affirmations beforeyou read it.
Do what you got to do.
(33:59):
I believe in you, just believein yourself.
All right, guys.
On that note, I want to saythank you.
I appreciate you.
Don't forget to subscribe tothe channel If you'd like to
donate to the show, I can use acup of coffee, a cup of tea, not
a donut, unless it's glutenfree.
(34:20):
All right, guys, I appreciateyou.
I will see you next week.
You're wonderful, you'reintelligent, you're sexy and you
got this.
Love you guys.
Talk to you later.
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