November 20, 2023 • 35 mins
Text Brian & Shawna (Fan Mail)
Have you ever wondered what it's like to transition from singing on an air conditioner in the backyard to becoming a Christian Contemporary Music artist? Today, we are joined by the talented Joel Vaughn, who shares his musical journey and the ups and downs that came along the way. Be prepared for some laughs as Joel reveals his love for Call of Duty, alongside the poignant self-reflection of his struggles to maintain a flawless public image while grappling with his own brokenness.
From discussing his humble beginnings to the therapeutic journey of finding his authentic self, Joel takes us on a rollercoaster ride of his life in the music industry. His story is a testament of resilience. This episode isn't just for music enthusiasts, it's a powerful narrative of overcoming adversity and embracing your true identity. So tune in and get inspired by Joel's passionate pursuit of his craft and his relentless dedication to his music.
Learn more about Joel Vaugh's Music at joelvaughnmusic.com
Ways to Join Us LIVE 👇
Live shows are on Thursdays at 8pm EST (unless it's a holiday or fifth Thursday of the month)
- Join us LIVE on your mobile phone
- Buy your own VR headset & earn some reward points from Meta!
- Apply to be a guest
- Join us on Instagram
Affiliate links are used when possible to help support this podcast.
- Get Your Own Podcast on BuzzSprout
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
But welcome to today's podcast replay from the
Killer B Studios.
Let's go ahead and dive on in,all right.
Well, our guest tonight, joel.
He's actually going to becoming to talk about when you
feel broken and beyond repair,and I would love to ask you guys
all here, by just showing ussome confetti, has anybody here
ever felt got to the place wherethey just felt broken or
(00:22):
unusable?
Wow, okay, yeah, okay, allright, okay.
So that's what we love talkingabout here at the studios is
things that that really juststruggles and challenges and
wins, but experiences that weall can probably relate to.
So I think this is going to bea great, a great show to have
them come out and share.
Well, okay, you know what?
(00:43):
Let's not, let's not keep himwaiting anymore.
Arcane, can you hit the guestintro?
And guys, let's bring him withsome confetti.
Let's bring out Joel, joelVaughn, come on out, joel.
It's like the price is right.
There you go, you've beenconfetti.
He's throwing confettieverywhere.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Look at this confetti .
Now I'm throwing up stuff thatI don't need to throw up because
I don't know what I'm doing Allright, here we go yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Yeah, that's awesome, that's great.
We're so happy you're here.
We're so happy you're here.
I love that you took the timeand and was brave enough to come
out here and say I'm going togo see what this metaverse
thing's about.
We don't know each other out inall our real life.
So he could easily say now, Idon't think so.
You seem a little weird, alittle crazy.
But here he is.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
I mean, I remember you shot me a message and I was
like that is the craziest thingI've ever heard and I get a lot
of requests.
But I was like I can't say noto this.
I got.
I got to find out what what inthe world.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
This is.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
You know, you know pretty soon like everything's
going to be changing becausewe're preparing for Christmas,
events coming up, and last yearall I can say is last year there
was a big blizzard that came in.
Someone came and decorated thewhole studio.
There were snowflakes fallingoutside.
I don't know exactly where it'sgoing this year, but it's you
never know.
Before we start, I would liketo give 30 seconds.
Can you give us 30 seconds?
(01:59):
Tell people who you are.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Hi confetti Confetti.
My name's Joel Vaughn, I'm aCCM artist, christian artist and
I have been performing andwriting songs and leading
worship since I was seven yearsold.
So that was that was a long,long time ago and way back in
the nineties.
Up to now, since I touredindependently for a number of
(02:26):
years and was offered arecording contract in 2015,
signed it and then took off anddo the radio thing and all that,
and I'm on the road pretty muchconsistently 24 seven and when
I'm not out on the road, I'mhome or I'm in the studio with
you guys now, apparently, yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Yeah, you're really a fixture now, joel.
Thank you, I'm permanent.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
But yeah, I've been doing the music thing for, you
know, most of my life.
It's crazy to think 30 yearsthat I've used my musical
talents, 20 years that I've beendoing professionally Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
What are you?
How old were you when youlearned guitar?
How many instruments do youplay?
Speaker 3 (03:12):
I play all the basic instruments.
So I play keys, guitar, bassand I sing, so all the guitars,
so electric acoustic.
I'm a producer as well, so Iproduce music.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Oh, nice, yeah, Nice.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
And so what is your favorite thing about?
You know, playing music andbeing on the road, Like what's
the part that you love the most.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
I love playing, I love doing the music part, but I
love meeting people and gettingto hear their stories and how
my songs have affected them.
And that kind of gives me,because sometimes I get to a
point where I'm like you know,what am I doing this for?
And then when I hear how mysongs have impacted somebody
else, I realize yes, this is whyI'm doing it.
It gives me more motivation tokeep going.
(03:56):
So that's what I love the most.
Speaker 5 (03:58):
Awesome.
Speaker 1 (03:59):
Did you?
Is that where you started?
Was playing like CCM music, ordid you start playing a
different type of music?
Speaker 3 (04:05):
It's more embarrassing.
So I started on the airconditioner condenser in my
backyard in Columbus,mississippi, in 1991.
And I sang a song by America'sheartthrob Donnie Osmond called
soldier of love.
That was the first song Iremember singing and the also
(04:29):
the first song.
I should never mention thatlike yeah, I think that was the
first song I remember liking andperforming.
I didn't perform it for anyone,I was.
I was standing on the back ofan air conditioner because I saw
do you all remember it?
Like Michael Jackson had amovie called moonwalker back in
the yeah, so we had that movieand he would.
he would stand over like thosevents and the air would blow up
underneath the shirt.
(04:49):
He knew the thing, or whatever,and so I was just copycating
that.
As a five year old, I thoughtthat was the goal I was like oh,
and then I would sing.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
So now you're going to go out and do that with and
throw a confetti in here RightAt the same time.
We're going to do like amoonwalk in here.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
I feel like I can moonwalk in here.
Maybe I bet you could.
Probably not today, since I'monly what an hour old, maybe an
hour old.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Yeah, yeah, you want to take it easy, you want to
take it slow.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Take it slow, although you seem to be advanced
.
I think advanced, and I playedenough call of duty.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
So I think I'm you know there's some pretty cool
games in here too, like we havea game night and there's a
pretty cool shooting game thatlike a lot of people like yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:31):
Yeah, pretty cool.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Well, you're going to have the headset for a while,
so you should actually go checkout Super Rumble and you have to
check it out.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Okay, it's pretty cool, but yeah, my son saw this
earlier and he was like, dad, Iwant to play that and I was like
, no, but no, you should let himgo.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Yeah, let him go, Like definitely play it man Like
let him play it.
I mean that's up to you, butyeah you're welcome.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
You're welcome to Right now.
He's like cool, does that belike a group right now?
Speaker 2 (05:57):
I'm like yeah if you'll do the interview for me,
son.
Yeah, just snap it right offyour head Like say people no,
it's a lot of fun you got towork for it.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
You got to work for it.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Yes, that's right.
No, you'll have a blast.
You'll have a blast.
No, that's cool.
Well, great.
Well, thank you for giving us alittle bit of insight of who
you are for those people herethat don't know who you are yet.
Like you know, when we firsttalk, when we first met, we're
talking about you coming, and Iwas sharing what the studio is
about and you you mentionedabout how you you would like
they maybe come and talk about atime that you felt broken and
(06:26):
and sometimes beyond repair.
So I thought maybe we shouldstart there.
So I guess let's start with whythe topic of broken and beyond
repair?
Why did that come to yourthought?
Speaker 3 (06:40):
Yeah, it's, it's.
It's definitely one of thosesubjects that it's like.
It's like it's only so much youwant to share, but also it's.
It's one of those things that Iknow a lot of the people that I
work with in this industrybehind the scenes, they have
this sense that they have toPresent a perfect version of
themselves, because we often, ashuman beings put you know,
(07:02):
pastors, leaders, christianartists, anybody who's
Faith-based and and a leaderlike up on a pedestal, so they
feel like they have to have itall together constantly and and
and.
That kind of stinks for a lot ofpeople, because then they start
to struggle with Sometimes sinpatterns, issues or things that
(07:22):
happen to them, that happen toliterally everyone else, but
they're struggling with itbehind the scenes because they
feel Like they have to have itall together and so that's
that's been something that in mylife.
So, you know, I I graduatedhigh school in 2003 and, like,
out the gate was leading worship.
You know, I was leading worshipin high school with my brother,
but I was always in a positionwhere I was in some type of
(07:46):
ministry.
You know, even when I wasn'tready for it, it was like all
right, you can sing, you'vealready been using your gifts
for the Lord.
So you are now a worship leadercongratulations.
And I'm like, okay, I have nopastoral training, but here I go
and it's like let's just throwhim out there.
And so that's just kind of howmy life went and I got to.
(08:11):
So I met my wife in 2003 andyou know, I knew I was gonna
marry her in 2003 and her dadwas like yeah, no, you're not,
You're gonna go to college first.
Smart, he's a much smarter manthan me.
I was like we live on love andhe was like no, you can live on
money, You're gonna provide formy daughter so.
(08:33):
I did propose to her in 2004 andWell, I kind of sort of we I
didn't really propose so much,as she knew that I had ordered a
ring and it came in the mail,and so it was kind of a.
It was the surprise, was notthere?
Proposed to my wife.
Well, I mean, I kind of did, Ikind of did sort of, but I
didn't get to do the down onBeen in me.
(08:55):
She was just like it.
She's like the answer is a yesand I'm like, okay, cool, that's
, that's good.
So, anyway, proposed.
We got married in 2006.
My first job in in in ministrywas doing music, and so I was a
worship leader for a small groupof actually, it's a large group
of students for somebody asyoung as I was In a little town
(09:17):
called Borger, texas, and that'sabout 35 miles north of
Amarillo.
Anybody know where Amarillo is?
Yeah, okay, so Amarillo theonly thing that we're known for
is the 72 ounce steak and yeah,and if you can eat it in less
(09:39):
than an hour.
You get it for free and thenyour doctor bill.
Your doctor bill is not free.
Oh and then, we have someCadillacs that stick up out of
the ground.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
So there's that he said 72 ounce steak Like 72
ounces.
Speaker 3 (09:53):
Yes, sir, like it's basically a slice of prime rib,
not slice.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
It's like.
It's like a.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
Why?
Why would anybody do that?
I don't know, I think.
I think the person that holdsthe record is like a 90 pound
woman and she did it in like 11.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
Are you serious?
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Gugling this when we're off the show you need to.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
They have a thing called the wall of shame and
most of them like they get toWrite their little comment and
his this one guy said neveragain.
And that's that said everything.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
I'll never try this.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
That sounds like bad news, so oh it's terrible.
It's terrible.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
So, anyway, I worked.
I lived in Amarillo Canyon.
That's where I went to school,that's that's where my children
were born.
When we got married, we marriedin the church that we met in me
and my wife and then we movedto Canyon Amarillo, went to
college, so I did get to marryher before I finished college.
So that's that I did pull a fastone on there.
(10:49):
But a Year later, I'm a year inand I'm already starting to
realize you know my brokenness.
I grew up in a home where wemoved around a whole lot.
When I was seven, my parents,my dad, was in the Air Force
full-time, but when he came homewe, I guess things just didn't
line up the way that they hadenvisioned and we, my parents,
(11:13):
had to file for bankruptcy whenI was seven years old and so we
lost everything when I was justa little kid, everything we
bounce from house to house tohouse.
A lot of people were like, well,why did you move around so much
?
Like, well, we were in themilitary and then when we got
out of the military we lost itall.
And so we kind of bouncedaround until we ended up in
Texas and that's like I said,where I met my wife.
(11:34):
But that kind of stuff affectedme as an adult and I didn't
really realize, and I carriedthat pain with me and a lot of
other stuff that happened behindthe scenes too, into adulthood
and I didn't realize how brokenI was until I started working at
this church in Amarillo andrealized that my whole life I
(11:58):
had been, I had been kind ofhiding behind this mask of
performance, because I start,like I said.
I started started singing whenI was five, five years old.
Started singing on a stage whenI was seven, so when I was
seven.
I'm performing and so, like, allI knew of who I was as a human
being was Joel the performer.
Joel the guy that everybodyliked the way that he's saying
(12:20):
and like if there was nothingelse about me, didn't like like
I Could put this out there, andso I kind of hid behind that
mask for a while until Irealized I couldn't do it
anymore and I didn't even likeme, and so I resigned from my
position as a worship leader atthis church.
It was my dream job.
It was a, you know, probably Idon't even know how many members
there were at that pointsomething north of ten thousand.
(12:42):
It was a very large church.
I was one of thirteen worshipleaders and I resigned so that I
could work on me, and mydaughter was born that year and
that was our fifth anniversary.
At that point, and I just Iwanted to know who Joel was
apart from doing music and who Iwas apart from all the things
(13:03):
that I struggled with.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
And so my son's tapping me on the shoulders Well
, that's, that's so so, as you,as before, we continue the story
, some of the things that you'retalking about there.
I would love to touch on some ofthat, like Well, first off, I
really think it's important tolike you're talking about how
you know, as an artist orsomebody that's in the church,
(13:25):
like if you're a worship pastoror someone that's even a
Christian, we kind of can reallystart hiding behind a mask when
we deal with these things.
And I know, like one of ourco-hosts, meta Olivia, has
shared Her.
She's not here tonight but shetalks about.
You know, she goes to therapynow and she's like a big fan of
that and but she said she was ata point where, you know, as a
(13:46):
Christian, she kind of hid thatbecause she felt like something
was wrong with her.
Yeah, because she felt thesethings and and what I?
What I think is surprising is,in the industry that that we're
in, and their radio industry orany kind of entertainment
industry, I Think that we do seepeople, you know, we know
people are put up on a pedestaland it doesn't give them the
(14:08):
freedom to be real about.
They actually are who theyactually are.
Yeah, because I mean we've seenit, I know Don will know
there's some people in here andradio that's in here tonight and
we know like it's kind of a.
It's a hard place for them tobe real at times because people
Do look at them on that pedestaland then if they do one little
thing wrong, they forget they'rehumans just like all of us here
(14:28):
, and we all like, how many herehave messed up this week?
There's some confetti right.
How many here would say like,okay, I just something that I
regret this week.
Or yeah, okay, yeah, so here weare, so and and that's hey,
sales, how you doing?
Yeah, so it's that's importantfor us to remember that, even
for people that are Performersor entertainers or actors or
whoever, who ever, even somebody, that it doesn't have to be an
(14:50):
entertainment, it's somebodythat you might look up to.
They have struggles too, and Ithink that's really important to
to wrap our minds around,because that helps us show grace
and stuff.
So when you, when you got, yougot this, you resigned and you
go back and you're with yourfamily and you're on this, this
(15:10):
place of discovery, it'sdiscovery who you really are.
Take us back there.
So what?
What are some of the thingsthat how your life started
changing a little bit?
Speaker 3 (15:18):
I mean, you kind of tapped into it.
I.
I went straight to therapy,like I did that for there wasn't
like I'm gonna do this for acertain amount of time and
Hopefully it sticks.
You know kind of thing Istarted with with with a
therapist, and you know it tookme some time to find the right
person to talk to you that Icould share everything I'd been
through with, and so I ended upin therapy for 18 months with
(15:42):
with a therapist, just talking,talking through, like learning
how to, you know, not hidebehind the mask and and realize
not who Joel thinks he is orworry about who everybody else
thinks Joel is, but who does Godsay that I am?
And so, like that.
That was a.
That was a process that I wentthrough for, like I said, 18
months, and At near the end ofthat process, there wasn't like,
(16:04):
hey, you're gonna take, takesome time away for 18 months or
12 months or whatever, or a yearor even six months.
You know there's no timeline onthis, I guess, is what I'm
getting at and so I startedleading worship again near the
end of that, in December of 2012, something like that anyway,
(16:26):
and and I didn't know if I felta calling to even really do
music anymore.
But if I did, I wanted it to beabsolutely loud and clear and I
thought it would be in thechurch, you know as a worship
leader, and what it ended upbeing was stepping out on the
road and Doing music full-timeand and that's kind of what,
(16:49):
what?
I didn't think that that wouldbe something I would do but,
like God had other plans and inFebruary of 2013, I stepped away
from a job at a church and Waslike I don't know if this is
nuts, if this is what I'msupposed to be doing, but it
seems like the direction I'msupposed to go, and I booked 96
events on my own without.
(17:10):
I didn't even really try Likedoing that now, even as an
artist that I've had multiplelike songs Chartered on
billboard.
That's difficult now.
Nobody knew who I.
Barely anyone knows who I amnow, but really no one knew who
I was back then and people werecalling me left and right like,
hey, we've heard your story inwhich we're about would you come
like speak to our youth?
(17:31):
Come share your testimony andand share your music, and I was
like, yeah, like what you know,why not?
Some of it was you know, do itfor free, and some of it was you
know we'll, we'll take care ofyou.
You know, because that was mybiggest concern is, like, at the
time, my daughter was only twoyears old.
She's 12 now, but she was twoyears old and I had to think
(17:51):
about like well, I have to havea job to take care of my family,
and God absolutely providedthat year, like we had more than
enough to get from point a topoint B and for me to be able to
do what I was doing, and so itall just kind of worked out.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
Wow, wow.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
That's awesome.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
That is amazing.
That is amazing.
The.
What I love, too is like I lovethat.
You know you can look at thattime.
First off, when you went totherapy, you said it was 18
months.
It wasn't like a.
This wasn't like a quick thing,and I think that's kind of the.
The Culture in the world, thecultural culture in the world
that we're in, we kind of lookfor this quick fixes.
(18:27):
We want a quick answer.
How do I get through this?
How do I stop doing this?
But that really takes somesomething.
And tension I don't it's reallythe right word Tensionality
actually step back, slow downand really go through that
process of discovering.
And that's not a quick thingOver night or in a week.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
It takes time when I really had to take music off the
table, Like you know, it's notthat I didn't have aspirations
or dreams to you know, Be asigned recording artist like.
Like I said, I stood up on anair conditioner condenser when I
was five years old.
I was like I'm Michael Jacksonor I'm Johnny Osmond, whatever.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Oh, you can stand up on this table right.
You know I can do it If youjump there you go.
Oh, I Felt like.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
Tom Cruise just now.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
God's looking down and I was saying you are
breaking.
Joel.
Would you stop please.
Like no, what I, what I loveabout that, that's a big, that's
a big deal.
What you just said there.
Like you, you put music aside,like you knew, like that's what,
something you had to do to beable to find who you were and
God, like your identity and himand what he was doing and, to be
honest, it's I'm so glad thatto hear, like I don't know Joel,
(19:39):
that much I'm gonna know more,just like you guys are right now
, you know, with being inentertainment industry and stuff
.
I love to hear that you wentthrough that, even though
obviously it's not something anyof us want to go through.
I'm glad that you went throughit and learn that before you
started hitting the road andperforming because now that's
what I love I hear people comingto you because they wanted you
to share your story, help theiryouth, because it's so important
(20:02):
to to let them see like, hey,this is real, like we all
struggle through these things.
You're not alone in that,because I think, like everybody
here throwing confetti, theyfelt broken before, they felt
beyond repair, they feltunusable.
This isn't something that youis not normal for a lot of
people.
A lot of us go through it.
We just all put on the mask andsay, no, you hide behind it.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
Yes, we hide behind whatever our vocation is or a
hobby or whatever else you knowthat we can absorb ourselves
into, and something that youknow like, yeah, something that
we don't have to project whatwe're really dealing with.
So Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Yeah, I was going to say that.
I think it's hugely encouragingto me and I'm sure to a lot of
other people to hear that youknow and I'm sure, like that 18
months, there's still things youprobably work through.
Like you know, you learn thetools to work through and things
.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
But, like you know, sometimes a problem presents and
you think, all right, well, Ijust got to get this handled.
I'm going to read some articles, I'm going to read a book,
whatever and get through this.
But, like problems that takeyears and years to damage, you
can't just be fixed you know, ina couple of days.
So I think it's reallyencouraging, like to think about
if there's something thatyou're dealing with and you
(21:25):
don't see it getting betterright away, keep pressing in and
getting those tools that youneed and talking to someone and,
you know, working with Godthrough those issues, because it
takes time, right, it does.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
It does, and you know that what I found is that that
not only applied in my spirituallife, but it also applied in my
physical life, like one of themain.
Well, one of a few of thereasons why I did this is
because when I was physicallyunhealthy in 2010, I had a
routine surgery, like a basichernia surgery, that nearly took
(22:00):
me out because I was sophysically unhealthy.
I was about 100 pounds heavierthan I am now and it was just.
It was one of those things that, like you know, for some people
it may not have been a big deal, but I struggled with high
blood pressure, you know, and Ineeded to do everything I could
to make sure that I would bearound for my kids later and I
(22:23):
wanted to be the best fatherthat I could be.
But I also needed to physicallybe better, because I had
doctors telling me that, likedude, you have the genes of a
75-year-old man at 24.
And so I started running in 2010, right Right after that surgery
, and I like I haven't lookedback.
(22:46):
Like it started with liketrying to change things
physically, you know, and then Irealized like it's something
deeper, you know.
Yeah, sure right, but and Inever really got well physically
until I addressed the spiritualand the mental, Like a lot of
people probably think likePerson, they'll get right there.
(23:07):
Yeah, I mean honestly and youcan see, I can share pictures of
what I looked like before andafter that 18 months.
I really didn't do anything allthat different physically, like
that diet and the exercise, allthat was pretty much the same.
Only it just felt like thingsstarted like when the emotional
baggage and when the spiritualbaggage began to come off, so
(23:27):
did other stuff and so yeah,because it's so stressful on
your body when you're carryingtrauma.
Yeah, absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
So that's just you wanna hear something interesting
, joel, we have had anotherguest on this show that was
almost taken out by a herniasurgery.
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Isn't that interesting?
Yeah, that is very interesting.
His name's.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Todd Stack.
His interview was fascinating,Like if you ever want to, you
should check it out.
I know Todd.
Speaker 1 (23:50):
That's how you might know Todd.
Yeah, you might know Todd, butI didn't think about that.
Speaker 4 (23:52):
Yes, I didn't know he had that in common.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
When you said that about the hernia surgery, I was
like what are the chances If?
Speaker 1 (23:58):
you ever wanna hear his story, go to the Killer Bee
Studios website and go to thepodcast.
You'll find in there that hisstory was.
You know he had a hernia butthe doctor messed up and cut
something like a main artery orsomething and he almost died, oh
my gosh.
And then he had to forgive.
He had to come back and Godtold him that he had to forgive
that doctor.
Going through this transition,you know, of discovering who you
(24:22):
are, of God and stuff how didGrace play a role in this with
you twin God?
Well, they had to play a role,right.
Speaker 3 (24:30):
Absolutely played a role, like when I said you know,
I took a step back, I had madea lot of mistakes, I had been
living in some pretty unhealthysin patterns and people had to
forgive me, but I learned that Ineeded to forgive other people.
You know, not everything wasrosy for me growing up and
(24:54):
Unforgiveness was absolutely oneof those things I struggled
with for a long time and,honestly, I, even after the 18
months In parting ways with withthat church, I still dealt with
unforgiveness for a number ofyears and I'm like I don't know
why I can't get past this,because, you know, I thought I'd
worked through this.
I have all these tools.
I know what God, you know, saysabout forgiveness and grace and
(25:18):
I know what he's done for me.
Why can't I extend grace?
And if it wasn't for the peoplethat extended grace to me
Namely my wife, to be perfectlyhonest, my wife and and other
people that I worked with Idon't know that I would have
ever been able to extend graceto someone else.
(25:39):
And so the lens that I viewother people through now is Is
vastly different than the way Iused to view them Years before.
Like, if somebody makes me mad,you know I do like I'm not
perfect man like I.
I get angry and, and you know,offline I'm like I don't like
this and I like this about thisperson and he did this and he
(26:02):
did that and I talked through itand then I realized, just like
me, they are a sinner that needsJesus too you know, like, and
then I forget about that wholelog that's in my eye when I'm
pointing out the speck in theireye.
It helps me To you know,understand my neighbor Like my
actual neighbor and my neighborlike just you know yes, my
(26:27):
fellow man, but like in my case,you know my actual neighbor,
some of the stuff that he's,he's dealing with, I mean like
what he was going throughactually him and another guy
from 10 years ago and helpedinspire a song that was about
grace that I'm gonna singtonight.
And you know, I see what God'sbrought me through and how he
(26:53):
changed me, how he changed myheart Through the grace that he
extended.
Like I, I thought I understoodgrace and and what Jesus did on
the cross for me at a Young agebecause I accepted Christ, you
know, as a kid, and it wasn'tuntil I had failed Massively and
saw grace from other peoplethat are really understood.
(27:17):
You know what that meant, youknow, and so I see that and
other people now and I'm like II am not judging you, I'm not
shaming you, it's not my place.
Like, my job as a songwriterand as a Christian is to lead
you to Christ and and that'sthat's all I really want to do,
like I want to share my musicand I want to show people what
God's done for me.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
All right, let's bring up the Q&A for anybody
that has a question or a thought.
So the mic will work where oneperson getting in at Time.
So if somebody has a questionor thought that they would like
to ask Joel or anybody up here,feel free to come on down the
mic and everybody will be ableto hear you.
So here comes Don.
Speaker 3 (27:55):
Could a woodchuck chuckle Come on?
Speaker 5 (28:01):
I Am here right now representing some of our
listeners, because they don'thave headsets and I told them
that we were doing this tonightand they want to make sure that
you knew how much friend meantto them and to me as well, when
I, when I heard it for the firsttime, before we even aired it,
I lost it, because there's somany times, you know, I came
(28:25):
into radio kind of sort of byaccident.
I didn't go the proper channelsof going to school and
communications or any of that.
It just kind of really stumbledon my lap and I had a lot of
thoughts of am I really Kind outfor this?
Am I in the right spot?
Is this where God really wantsme to be?
And, you know, am I doing, youknow, whatever?
But then that song came out andI'm like, okay, even when I'm
(28:49):
my own worst enemy, I still haveJesus on my side and that's all
it matters and everything'skind of fell in, fall into place
from that.
But I wanted to probably tellyou kind of they're gonna be
listening to the podcast andthey'd be mad at me If I didn't
tell them but how much that songmeant to them.
Well thanks for letting me know, and I don't know if you knew
this, don, but I have abroadcasting degree, and now I'm
(29:12):
in music so that I who elsehere can say that they had a
jingle written for them fromJoel Vaughan?
Two, three years yeah, I stillhave that.
Speaker 3 (29:30):
I don't know that.
Speaker 5 (29:31):
I remember the jingle to be hey, I'm here to proclaim
and you winked.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
You are totally double-jointed, mr Killer B,
like you see, yeah, we do like atalent thing, like watch this.
Oh, we're gonna have a talentshow here.
Yeah, I'll explain it to youlater.
I'll explain to you.
Yeah, just do, the robot willexplain to you later it.
People aren't gonna want toknow, they're not interested in
(30:12):
that.
I Would you know.
I would say you know that'svery interesting because, mrs
Killer B, what did I tell youtoday?
Speaker 2 (30:21):
I think you tell me a lot of things today, but which
thing in particular?
Speaker 1 (30:24):
I mean, this is what's good, is like Don just
shared that and people raisedtheir hands like I'm.
I've been preparing for I gottado two talks at a conference
and less than a week and there'sa lot of stuff that I'm trying
to prepare.
I got talk about AI and then Igot talk about the metaverse and
I've been preparing this AIthing and I've been getting in
my own head and what did I comeout and tell you today?
Speaker 2 (30:46):
Oh my gosh, you're so putting me on the spot.
Speaker 1 (30:48):
I'm putting you on the spot.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
That you said you just got to talk about what you
know.
Speaker 1 (30:54):
Yeah, well, that's not what I was looking for.
But what I was saying wasbasically like I don't feel like
I can do this, like why do theywant me to come talk about this
?
I was like I'm having a hardtime, like I was like you know,
I just there's probably somebodybetter and it's getting in your
own head too, and you, you know.
You said you know God'sprepared you for this too.
Like there's a reason, likethey saw they aren't just going
(31:14):
to ask anybody to come share andtalk about this stuff.
Like they see something in youand but it is, we get in our own
heads in so many differentareas of our life.
But I think that's so important, like you're saying, mrs Killer
B now I know that you didn'tlisten to me, so so we can talk
about that during honey talksnext time.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
So you guys know where we're going.
We're eating so much water.
Now, yeah, exactly, we'reeating so much water to sink.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
Yes, I got wot, wot, wot over here, not even on the
sound board.
Yeah, you didn't need it.
Yeah, no, that's great.
That's great.
No, it's a, it is.
It's important to see Fated.
Come on down, man.
Come on down.
If you got a question, come onup to the mic, man, you don't
have to raise your hand, justcome on down the mic and and uh
he's, he's unmuting himself.
Okay, cool, awesome.
(31:59):
Thanks for joining us.
Speaker 4 (32:00):
Fated hey good to see you, man, can you?
Speaker 1 (32:03):
hear me, we can hear, you, man, we can hear you man
Gotcha.
Speaker 4 (32:05):
I don't have a question.
I should have a statement.
I'm saying that I don't want tofeel like I'm sorry.
My biggest interview like tochange my family's life and
before I went there I listenedto your song.
I look at you because I was sonervous and I haven't been to an
interview like like 15 yearsfor a new job and I played that
song and it took a lot of weightoff of me and I got the job and
(32:28):
I just want to let you knowthat.
Thanks, man.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
So man, that's amazing.
Fated, what is a pop song?
Thank you, man.
Thank you so much.
That's awesome.
That's awesome, I love it.
Speaker 3 (32:38):
That's beautiful.
It's going to make me cry.
I listen.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
So just to let you know, you have the quest too,
and it is not good to cry onthose.
I mean, fated's probably like,he's probably got sponges.
He's coming out right now andtrying to just drip the tears
out Now.
I love that man.
Thank you so much, fated.
I love you, man.
It's not the first time.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
I've cried on a headset.
They'll be fine, don't worry,it's not.
Speaker 1 (32:58):
I won't, I won't.
We always ask our guests toshare, like, to kind of give us
like a closing thought, and Iwould like to ask you, I would
like to ask you, I guess, twothings Before you give us your
closing thought.
I always said, let me give youone more thing, but let me get
asked for two more things.
I'm always asking for a littlebit more.
So, no, I would like to ask you, what advice would you give to
(33:19):
someone who might be feelinglike they are beyond repair or
used up?
You know there's going to bepeople listening to the podcast.
What would you say to peoplethat's in the place where you
were before?
Speaker 3 (33:31):
You are not too broken, you're not too used up,
you are not too far gone.
You can always, always run toJesus, and sometimes I mean
first and foremost, run to Jesus.
He's listening, he's there, he.
You know like that's first andforemost.
And secondly, you probably havea lot more friends than you
(33:54):
think you do, and but even evenif you don't cry out to Jesus
and he will lead you to thosepeople, I truly believe that he
led me to those people and heled me to the right person to
help me, which ended up beingtherapy for, like I said, 18
months.
Speaker 1 (34:14):
If there's one thing that you would hope people would
take away with them tonight,what would it be?
Speaker 3 (34:22):
Kind of just what I said, like if you are struggling
with that, you know, I know noteverybody's struggling
constantly and some people arein better places in life
mentally and spiritually I knowI am than than what I was 10
years ago or even two years ago.
But sometimes you could bewalking along and then life just
throws you a curveball andsuddenly you feel like you're
(34:44):
right back at step.
It's like two steps forward, 14steps back.
You know, get back up and keepmoving.
There is a light at the end ofthe tunnel and even if you can't
see it, look for the pinhole,like look for it and keep
digging and keep moving.
It's worth it, the work isworth it.
Speaker 1 (35:05):
Thanks for tuning in to the Stories we Live podcast.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
And before you go make sure you hit that subscribe
button, and we'd love it if youwould leave us a review.
But welcome to today's podcast replay from the
Killer B Studios.
Let's go ahead and dive on in,all right.
Well, our guest tonight, joel.
He's actually going to becoming to talk about when you
feel broken and beyond repair,and I would love to ask you guys
all here, by just showing ussome confetti, has anybody here
ever felt got to the place wherethey just felt broken or
(00:22):
unusable?
Wow, okay, yeah, okay, allright, okay.
So that's what we love talkingabout here at the studios is
things that that really juststruggles and challenges and
wins, but experiences that weall can probably relate to.
So I think this is going to bea great, a great show to have
them come out and share.
Well, okay, you know what?
(00:43):
Let's not, let's not keep himwaiting anymore.
Arcane, can you hit the guestintro?
And guys, let's bring him withsome confetti.
Let's bring out Joel, joelVaughn, come on out, joel.
It's like the price is right.
There you go, you've beenconfetti.
He's throwing confettieverywhere.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Look at this confetti .
Now I'm throwing up stuff thatI don't need to throw up because
I don't know what I'm doing Allright, here we go yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Yeah, that's awesome, that's great.
We're so happy you're here.
We're so happy you're here.
I love that you took the timeand and was brave enough to come
out here and say I'm going togo see what this metaverse
thing's about.
We don't know each other out inall our real life.
So he could easily say now, Idon't think so.
You seem a little weird, alittle crazy.
But here he is.
Speaker 3 (01:25):
I mean, I remember you shot me a message and I was
like that is the craziest thingI've ever heard and I get a lot
of requests.
But I was like I can't say noto this.
I got.
I got to find out what what inthe world.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
This is.
Speaker 1 (01:38):
You know, you know pretty soon like everything's
going to be changing becausewe're preparing for Christmas,
events coming up, and last yearall I can say is last year there
was a big blizzard that came in.
Someone came and decorated thewhole studio.
There were snowflakes fallingoutside.
I don't know exactly where it'sgoing this year, but it's you
never know.
Before we start, I would liketo give 30 seconds.
Can you give us 30 seconds?
(01:59):
Tell people who you are.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
Hi confetti Confetti.
My name's Joel Vaughn, I'm aCCM artist, christian artist and
I have been performing andwriting songs and leading
worship since I was seven yearsold.
So that was that was a long,long time ago and way back in
the nineties.
Up to now, since I touredindependently for a number of
(02:26):
years and was offered arecording contract in 2015,
signed it and then took off anddo the radio thing and all that,
and I'm on the road pretty muchconsistently 24 seven and when
I'm not out on the road, I'mhome or I'm in the studio with
you guys now, apparently, yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Yeah, you're really a fixture now, joel.
Thank you, I'm permanent.
Speaker 3 (02:51):
But yeah, I've been doing the music thing for, you
know, most of my life.
It's crazy to think 30 yearsthat I've used my musical
talents, 20 years that I've beendoing professionally Wow.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
What are you?
How old were you when youlearned guitar?
How many instruments do youplay?
Speaker 3 (03:12):
I play all the basic instruments.
So I play keys, guitar, bassand I sing, so all the guitars,
so electric acoustic.
I'm a producer as well, so Iproduce music.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Oh, nice, yeah, Nice.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
And so what is your favorite thing about?
You know, playing music andbeing on the road, Like what's
the part that you love the most.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
I love playing, I love doing the music part, but I
love meeting people and gettingto hear their stories and how
my songs have affected them.
And that kind of gives me,because sometimes I get to a
point where I'm like you know,what am I doing this for?
And then when I hear how mysongs have impacted somebody
else, I realize yes, this is whyI'm doing it.
It gives me more motivation tokeep going.
(03:56):
So that's what I love the most.
Speaker 5 (03:58):
Awesome.
Speaker 1 (03:59):
Did you?
Is that where you started?
Was playing like CCM music, ordid you start playing a
different type of music?
Speaker 3 (04:05):
It's more embarrassing.
So I started on the airconditioner condenser in my
backyard in Columbus,mississippi, in 1991.
And I sang a song by America'sheartthrob Donnie Osmond called
soldier of love.
That was the first song Iremember singing and the also
(04:29):
the first song.
I should never mention thatlike yeah, I think that was the
first song I remember liking andperforming.
I didn't perform it for anyone,I was.
I was standing on the back ofan air conditioner because I saw
do you all remember it?
Like Michael Jackson had amovie called moonwalker back in
the yeah, so we had that movieand he would.
he would stand over like thosevents and the air would blow up
underneath the shirt.
(04:49):
He knew the thing, or whatever,and so I was just copycating
that.
As a five year old, I thoughtthat was the goal I was like oh,
and then I would sing.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
So now you're going to go out and do that with and
throw a confetti in here RightAt the same time.
We're going to do like amoonwalk in here.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
I feel like I can moonwalk in here.
Maybe I bet you could.
Probably not today, since I'monly what an hour old, maybe an
hour old.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Yeah, yeah, you want to take it easy, you want to
take it slow.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Take it slow, although you seem to be advanced
.
I think advanced, and I playedenough call of duty.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
So I think I'm you know there's some pretty cool
games in here too, like we havea game night and there's a
pretty cool shooting game thatlike a lot of people like yeah.
Speaker 3 (05:31):
Yeah, pretty cool.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Well, you're going to have the headset for a while,
so you should actually go checkout Super Rumble and you have to
check it out.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Okay, it's pretty cool, but yeah, my son saw this
earlier and he was like, dad, Iwant to play that and I was like
, no, but no, you should let himgo.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Yeah, let him go, Like definitely play it man Like
let him play it.
I mean that's up to you, butyeah you're welcome.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
You're welcome to Right now.
He's like cool, does that belike a group right now?
Speaker 2 (05:57):
I'm like yeah if you'll do the interview for me,
son.
Yeah, just snap it right offyour head Like say people no,
it's a lot of fun you got towork for it.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
You got to work for it.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Yes, that's right.
No, you'll have a blast.
You'll have a blast.
No, that's cool.
Well, great.
Well, thank you for giving us alittle bit of insight of who
you are for those people herethat don't know who you are yet.
Like you know, when we firsttalk, when we first met, we're
talking about you coming, and Iwas sharing what the studio is
about and you you mentionedabout how you you would like
they maybe come and talk about atime that you felt broken and
(06:26):
and sometimes beyond repair.
So I thought maybe we shouldstart there.
So I guess let's start with whythe topic of broken and beyond
repair?
Why did that come to yourthought?
Speaker 3 (06:40):
Yeah, it's, it's.
It's definitely one of thosesubjects that it's like.
It's like it's only so much youwant to share, but also it's.
It's one of those things that Iknow a lot of the people that I
work with in this industrybehind the scenes, they have
this sense that they have toPresent a perfect version of
themselves, because we often, ashuman beings put you know,
(07:02):
pastors, leaders, christianartists, anybody who's
Faith-based and and a leaderlike up on a pedestal, so they
feel like they have to have itall together constantly and and
and.
That kind of stinks for a lot ofpeople, because then they start
to struggle with Sometimes sinpatterns, issues or things that
(07:22):
happen to them, that happen toliterally everyone else, but
they're struggling with itbehind the scenes because they
feel Like they have to have itall together and so that's
that's been something that in mylife.
So, you know, I I graduatedhigh school in 2003 and, like,
out the gate was leading worship.
You know, I was leading worshipin high school with my brother,
but I was always in a positionwhere I was in some type of
(07:46):
ministry.
You know, even when I wasn'tready for it, it was like all
right, you can sing, you'vealready been using your gifts
for the Lord.
So you are now a worship leadercongratulations.
And I'm like, okay, I have nopastoral training, but here I go
and it's like let's just throwhim out there.
And so that's just kind of howmy life went and I got to.
(08:11):
So I met my wife in 2003 andyou know, I knew I was gonna
marry her in 2003 and her dadwas like yeah, no, you're not,
You're gonna go to college first.
Smart, he's a much smarter manthan me.
I was like we live on love andhe was like no, you can live on
money, You're gonna provide formy daughter so.
(08:33):
I did propose to her in 2004 andWell, I kind of sort of we I
didn't really propose so much,as she knew that I had ordered a
ring and it came in the mail,and so it was kind of a.
It was the surprise, was notthere?
Proposed to my wife.
Well, I mean, I kind of did, Ikind of did sort of, but I
didn't get to do the down onBeen in me.
(08:55):
She was just like it.
She's like the answer is a yesand I'm like, okay, cool, that's
, that's good.
So, anyway, proposed.
We got married in 2006.
My first job in in in ministrywas doing music, and so I was a
worship leader for a small groupof actually, it's a large group
of students for somebody asyoung as I was In a little town
(09:17):
called Borger, texas, and that'sabout 35 miles north of
Amarillo.
Anybody know where Amarillo is?
Yeah, okay, so Amarillo theonly thing that we're known for
is the 72 ounce steak and yeah,and if you can eat it in less
(09:39):
than an hour.
You get it for free and thenyour doctor bill.
Your doctor bill is not free.
Oh and then, we have someCadillacs that stick up out of
the ground.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
So there's that he said 72 ounce steak Like 72
ounces.
Speaker 3 (09:53):
Yes, sir, like it's basically a slice of prime rib,
not slice.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
It's like.
It's like a.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
Why?
Why would anybody do that?
I don't know, I think.
I think the person that holdsthe record is like a 90 pound
woman and she did it in like 11.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
Are you serious?
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Gugling this when we're off the show you need to.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
They have a thing called the wall of shame and
most of them like they get toWrite their little comment and
his this one guy said neveragain.
And that's that said everything.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
I'll never try this.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
That sounds like bad news, so oh it's terrible.
It's terrible.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
So, anyway, I worked.
I lived in Amarillo Canyon.
That's where I went to school,that's that's where my children
were born.
When we got married, we marriedin the church that we met in me
and my wife and then we movedto Canyon Amarillo, went to
college, so I did get to marryher before I finished college.
So that's that I did pull a fastone on there.
(10:49):
But a Year later, I'm a year inand I'm already starting to
realize you know my brokenness.
I grew up in a home where wemoved around a whole lot.
When I was seven, my parents,my dad, was in the Air Force
full-time, but when he came homewe, I guess things just didn't
line up the way that they hadenvisioned and we, my parents,
(11:13):
had to file for bankruptcy whenI was seven years old and so we
lost everything when I was justa little kid, everything we
bounce from house to house tohouse.
A lot of people were like, well,why did you move around so much
?
Like, well, we were in themilitary and then when we got
out of the military we lost itall.
And so we kind of bouncedaround until we ended up in
Texas and that's like I said,where I met my wife.
(11:34):
But that kind of stuff affectedme as an adult and I didn't
really realize, and I carriedthat pain with me and a lot of
other stuff that happened behindthe scenes too, into adulthood
and I didn't realize how brokenI was until I started working at
this church in Amarillo andrealized that my whole life I
(11:58):
had been, I had been kind ofhiding behind this mask of
performance, because I start,like I said.
I started started singing whenI was five, five years old.
Started singing on a stage whenI was seven, so when I was
seven.
I'm performing and so, like, allI knew of who I was as a human
being was Joel the performer.
Joel the guy that everybodyliked the way that he's saying
(12:20):
and like if there was nothingelse about me, didn't like like
I Could put this out there, andso I kind of hid behind that
mask for a while until Irealized I couldn't do it
anymore and I didn't even likeme, and so I resigned from my
position as a worship leader atthis church.
It was my dream job.
It was a, you know, probably Idon't even know how many members
there were at that pointsomething north of ten thousand.
(12:42):
It was a very large church.
I was one of thirteen worshipleaders and I resigned so that I
could work on me, and mydaughter was born that year and
that was our fifth anniversary.
At that point, and I just Iwanted to know who Joel was
apart from doing music and who Iwas apart from all the things
(13:03):
that I struggled with.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
And so my son's tapping me on the shoulders Well
, that's, that's so so, as you,as before, we continue the story
, some of the things that you'retalking about there.
I would love to touch on some ofthat, like Well, first off, I
really think it's important tolike you're talking about how
you know, as an artist orsomebody that's in the church,
(13:25):
like if you're a worship pastoror someone that's even a
Christian, we kind of can reallystart hiding behind a mask when
we deal with these things.
And I know, like one of ourco-hosts, meta Olivia, has
shared Her.
She's not here tonight but shetalks about.
You know, she goes to therapynow and she's like a big fan of
that and but she said she was ata point where, you know, as a
(13:46):
Christian, she kind of hid thatbecause she felt like something
was wrong with her.
Yeah, because she felt thesethings and and what I?
What I think is surprising is,in the industry that that we're
in, and their radio industry orany kind of entertainment
industry, I Think that we do seepeople, you know, we know
people are put up on a pedestaland it doesn't give them the
(14:08):
freedom to be real about.
They actually are who theyactually are.
Yeah, because I mean we've seenit, I know Don will know
there's some people in here andradio that's in here tonight and
we know like it's kind of a.
It's a hard place for them tobe real at times because people
Do look at them on that pedestaland then if they do one little
thing wrong, they forget they'rehumans just like all of us here
(14:28):
, and we all like, how many herehave messed up this week?
There's some confetti right.
How many here would say like,okay, I just something that I
regret this week.
Or yeah, okay, yeah, so here weare, so and and that's hey,
sales, how you doing?
Yeah, so it's that's importantfor us to remember that, even
for people that are Performersor entertainers or actors or
whoever, who ever, even somebody, that it doesn't have to be an
(14:50):
entertainment, it's somebodythat you might look up to.
They have struggles too, and Ithink that's really important to
to wrap our minds around,because that helps us show grace
and stuff.
So when you, when you got, yougot this, you resigned and you
go back and you're with yourfamily and you're on this, this
(15:10):
place of discovery, it'sdiscovery who you really are.
Take us back there.
So what?
What are some of the thingsthat how your life started
changing a little bit?
Speaker 3 (15:18):
I mean, you kind of tapped into it.
I.
I went straight to therapy,like I did that for there wasn't
like I'm gonna do this for acertain amount of time and
Hopefully it sticks.
You know kind of thing Istarted with with with a
therapist, and you know it tookme some time to find the right
person to talk to you that Icould share everything I'd been
through with, and so I ended upin therapy for 18 months with
(15:42):
with a therapist, just talking,talking through, like learning
how to, you know, not hidebehind the mask and and realize
not who Joel thinks he is orworry about who everybody else
thinks Joel is, but who does Godsay that I am?
And so, like that.
That was a.
That was a process that I wentthrough for, like I said, 18
months, and At near the end ofthat process, there wasn't like,
(16:04):
hey, you're gonna take, takesome time away for 18 months or
12 months or whatever, or a yearor even six months.
You know there's no timeline onthis, I guess, is what I'm
getting at and so I startedleading worship again near the
end of that, in December of 2012, something like that anyway,
(16:26):
and and I didn't know if I felta calling to even really do
music anymore.
But if I did, I wanted it to beabsolutely loud and clear and I
thought it would be in thechurch, you know as a worship
leader, and what it ended upbeing was stepping out on the
road and Doing music full-timeand and that's kind of what,
(16:49):
what?
I didn't think that that wouldbe something I would do but,
like God had other plans and inFebruary of 2013, I stepped away
from a job at a church and Waslike I don't know if this is
nuts, if this is what I'msupposed to be doing, but it
seems like the direction I'msupposed to go, and I booked 96
events on my own without.
(17:10):
I didn't even really try Likedoing that now, even as an
artist that I've had multiplelike songs Chartered on
billboard.
That's difficult now.
Nobody knew who I.
Barely anyone knows who I amnow, but really no one knew who
I was back then and people werecalling me left and right like,
hey, we've heard your story inwhich we're about would you come
like speak to our youth?
(17:31):
Come share your testimony andand share your music, and I was
like, yeah, like what you know,why not?
Some of it was you know, do itfor free, and some of it was you
know we'll, we'll take care ofyou.
You know, because that was mybiggest concern is, like, at the
time, my daughter was only twoyears old.
She's 12 now, but she was twoyears old and I had to think
(17:51):
about like well, I have to havea job to take care of my family,
and God absolutely providedthat year, like we had more than
enough to get from point a topoint B and for me to be able to
do what I was doing, and so itall just kind of worked out.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
Wow, wow.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
That's awesome.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
That is amazing.
That is amazing.
The.
What I love, too is like I lovethat.
You know you can look at thattime.
First off, when you went totherapy, you said it was 18
months.
It wasn't like a.
This wasn't like a quick thing,and I think that's kind of the.
The Culture in the world, thecultural culture in the world
that we're in, we kind of lookfor this quick fixes.
(18:27):
We want a quick answer.
How do I get through this?
How do I stop doing this?
But that really takes somesomething.
And tension I don't it's reallythe right word Tensionality
actually step back, slow downand really go through that
process of discovering.
And that's not a quick thingOver night or in a week.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
It takes time when I really had to take music off the
table, Like you know, it's notthat I didn't have aspirations
or dreams to you know, Be asigned recording artist like.
Like I said, I stood up on anair conditioner condenser when I
was five years old.
I was like I'm Michael Jacksonor I'm Johnny Osmond, whatever.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Oh, you can stand up on this table right.
You know I can do it If youjump there you go.
Oh, I Felt like.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
Tom Cruise just now.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
God's looking down and I was saying you are
breaking.
Joel.
Would you stop please.
Like no, what I, what I loveabout that, that's a big, that's
a big deal.
What you just said there.
Like you, you put music aside,like you knew, like that's what,
something you had to do to beable to find who you were and
God, like your identity and himand what he was doing and, to be
honest, it's I'm so glad thatto hear, like I don't know Joel,
(19:39):
that much I'm gonna know more,just like you guys are right now
, you know, with being inentertainment industry and stuff
.
I love to hear that you wentthrough that, even though
obviously it's not something anyof us want to go through.
I'm glad that you went throughit and learn that before you
started hitting the road andperforming because now that's
what I love I hear people comingto you because they wanted you
to share your story, help theiryouth, because it's so important
(20:02):
to to let them see like, hey,this is real, like we all
struggle through these things.
You're not alone in that,because I think, like everybody
here throwing confetti, theyfelt broken before, they felt
beyond repair, they feltunusable.
This isn't something that youis not normal for a lot of
people.
A lot of us go through it.
We just all put on the mask andsay, no, you hide behind it.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
Yes, we hide behind whatever our vocation is or a
hobby or whatever else you knowthat we can absorb ourselves
into, and something that youknow like, yeah, something that
we don't have to project whatwe're really dealing with.
So Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Yeah, I was going to say that.
I think it's hugely encouragingto me and I'm sure to a lot of
other people to hear that youknow and I'm sure, like that 18
months, there's still things youprobably work through.
Like you know, you learn thetools to work through and things
.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
But, like you know, sometimes a problem presents and
you think, all right, well, Ijust got to get this handled.
I'm going to read some articles, I'm going to read a book,
whatever and get through this.
But, like problems that takeyears and years to damage, you
can't just be fixed you know, ina couple of days.
So I think it's reallyencouraging, like to think about
if there's something thatyou're dealing with and you
(21:25):
don't see it getting betterright away, keep pressing in and
getting those tools that youneed and talking to someone and,
you know, working with Godthrough those issues, because it
takes time, right, it does.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
It does, and you know that what I found is that that
not only applied in my spirituallife, but it also applied in my
physical life, like one of themain.
Well, one of a few of thereasons why I did this is
because when I was physicallyunhealthy in 2010, I had a
routine surgery, like a basichernia surgery, that nearly took
(22:00):
me out because I was sophysically unhealthy.
I was about 100 pounds heavierthan I am now and it was just.
It was one of those things that, like you know, for some people
it may not have been a big deal, but I struggled with high
blood pressure, you know, and Ineeded to do everything I could
to make sure that I would bearound for my kids later and I
(22:23):
wanted to be the best fatherthat I could be.
But I also needed to physicallybe better, because I had
doctors telling me that, likedude, you have the genes of a
75-year-old man at 24.
And so I started running in 2010, right Right after that surgery
, and I like I haven't lookedback.
(22:46):
Like it started with liketrying to change things
physically, you know, and then Irealized like it's something
deeper, you know.
Yeah, sure right, but and Inever really got well physically
until I addressed the spiritualand the mental, Like a lot of
people probably think likePerson, they'll get right there.
(23:07):
Yeah, I mean honestly and youcan see, I can share pictures of
what I looked like before andafter that 18 months.
I really didn't do anything allthat different physically, like
that diet and the exercise, allthat was pretty much the same.
Only it just felt like thingsstarted like when the emotional
baggage and when the spiritualbaggage began to come off, so
(23:27):
did other stuff and so yeah,because it's so stressful on
your body when you're carryingtrauma.
Yeah, absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
So that's just you wanna hear something interesting
, joel, we have had anotherguest on this show that was
almost taken out by a herniasurgery.
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Isn't that interesting?
Yeah, that is very interesting.
His name's.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Todd Stack.
His interview was fascinating,Like if you ever want to, you
should check it out.
I know Todd.
Speaker 1 (23:50):
That's how you might know Todd.
Yeah, you might know Todd, butI didn't think about that.
Speaker 4 (23:52):
Yes, I didn't know he had that in common.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
When you said that about the hernia surgery, I was
like what are the chances If?
Speaker 1 (23:58):
you ever wanna hear his story, go to the Killer Bee
Studios website and go to thepodcast.
You'll find in there that hisstory was.
You know he had a hernia butthe doctor messed up and cut
something like a main artery orsomething and he almost died, oh
my gosh.
And then he had to forgive.
He had to come back and Godtold him that he had to forgive
that doctor.
Going through this transition,you know, of discovering who you
(24:22):
are, of God and stuff how didGrace play a role in this with
you twin God?
Well, they had to play a role,right.
Speaker 3 (24:30):
Absolutely played a role, like when I said you know,
I took a step back, I had madea lot of mistakes, I had been
living in some pretty unhealthysin patterns and people had to
forgive me, but I learned that Ineeded to forgive other people.
You know, not everything wasrosy for me growing up and
(24:54):
Unforgiveness was absolutely oneof those things I struggled
with for a long time and,honestly, I, even after the 18
months In parting ways with withthat church, I still dealt with
unforgiveness for a number ofyears and I'm like I don't know
why I can't get past this,because, you know, I thought I'd
worked through this.
I have all these tools.
I know what God, you know, saysabout forgiveness and grace and
(25:18):
I know what he's done for me.
Why can't I extend grace?
And if it wasn't for the peoplethat extended grace to me
Namely my wife, to be perfectlyhonest, my wife and and other
people that I worked with Idon't know that I would have
ever been able to extend graceto someone else.
(25:39):
And so the lens that I viewother people through now is Is
vastly different than the way Iused to view them Years before.
Like, if somebody makes me mad,you know I do like I'm not
perfect man like I.
I get angry and, and you know,offline I'm like I don't like
this and I like this about thisperson and he did this and he
(26:02):
did that and I talked through itand then I realized, just like
me, they are a sinner that needsJesus too you know, like, and
then I forget about that wholelog that's in my eye when I'm
pointing out the speck in theireye.
It helps me To you know,understand my neighbor Like my
actual neighbor and my neighborlike just you know yes, my
(26:27):
fellow man, but like in my case,you know my actual neighbor,
some of the stuff that he's,he's dealing with, I mean like
what he was going throughactually him and another guy
from 10 years ago and helpedinspire a song that was about
grace that I'm gonna singtonight.
And you know, I see what God'sbrought me through and how he
(26:53):
changed me, how he changed myheart Through the grace that he
extended.
Like I, I thought I understoodgrace and and what Jesus did on
the cross for me at a Young agebecause I accepted Christ, you
know, as a kid, and it wasn'tuntil I had failed Massively and
saw grace from other peoplethat are really understood.
(27:17):
You know what that meant, youknow, and so I see that and
other people now and I'm like II am not judging you, I'm not
shaming you, it's not my place.
Like, my job as a songwriterand as a Christian is to lead
you to Christ and and that'sthat's all I really want to do,
like I want to share my musicand I want to show people what
God's done for me.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
All right, let's bring up the Q&A for anybody
that has a question or a thought.
So the mic will work where oneperson getting in at Time.
So if somebody has a questionor thought that they would like
to ask Joel or anybody up here,feel free to come on down the
mic and everybody will be ableto hear you.
So here comes Don.
Speaker 3 (27:55):
Could a woodchuck chuckle Come on?
Speaker 5 (28:01):
I Am here right now representing some of our
listeners, because they don'thave headsets and I told them
that we were doing this tonightand they want to make sure that
you knew how much friend meantto them and to me as well, when
I, when I heard it for the firsttime, before we even aired it,
I lost it, because there's somany times, you know, I came
(28:25):
into radio kind of sort of byaccident.
I didn't go the proper channelsof going to school and
communications or any of that.
It just kind of really stumbledon my lap and I had a lot of
thoughts of am I really Kind outfor this?
Am I in the right spot?
Is this where God really wantsme to be?
And, you know, am I doing, youknow, whatever?
But then that song came out andI'm like, okay, even when I'm
(28:49):
my own worst enemy, I still haveJesus on my side and that's all
it matters and everything'skind of fell in, fall into place
from that.
But I wanted to probably tellyou kind of they're gonna be
listening to the podcast andthey'd be mad at me If I didn't
tell them but how much that songmeant to them.
Well thanks for letting me know, and I don't know if you knew
this, don, but I have abroadcasting degree, and now I'm
(29:12):
in music so that I who elsehere can say that they had a
jingle written for them fromJoel Vaughan?
Two, three years yeah, I stillhave that.
Speaker 3 (29:30):
I don't know that.
Speaker 5 (29:31):
I remember the jingle to be hey, I'm here to proclaim
and you winked.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
You are totally double-jointed, mr Killer B,
like you see, yeah, we do like atalent thing, like watch this.
Oh, we're gonna have a talentshow here.
Yeah, I'll explain it to youlater.
I'll explain to you.
Yeah, just do, the robot willexplain to you later it.
People aren't gonna want toknow, they're not interested in
(30:12):
that.
I Would you know.
I would say you know that'svery interesting because, mrs
Killer B, what did I tell youtoday?
Speaker 2 (30:21):
I think you tell me a lot of things today, but which
thing in particular?
Speaker 1 (30:24):
I mean, this is what's good, is like Don just
shared that and people raisedtheir hands like I'm.
I've been preparing for I gottado two talks at a conference
and less than a week and there'sa lot of stuff that I'm trying
to prepare.
I got talk about AI and then Igot talk about the metaverse and
I've been preparing this AIthing and I've been getting in
my own head and what did I comeout and tell you today?
Speaker 2 (30:46):
Oh my gosh, you're so putting me on the spot.
Speaker 1 (30:48):
I'm putting you on the spot.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
That you said you just got to talk about what you
know.
Speaker 1 (30:54):
Yeah, well, that's not what I was looking for.
But what I was saying wasbasically like I don't feel like
I can do this, like why do theywant me to come talk about this
?
I was like I'm having a hardtime, like I was like you know,
I just there's probably somebodybetter and it's getting in your
own head too, and you, you know.
You said you know God'sprepared you for this too.
Like there's a reason, likethey saw they aren't just going
(31:14):
to ask anybody to come share andtalk about this stuff.
Like they see something in youand but it is, we get in our own
heads in so many differentareas of our life.
But I think that's so important, like you're saying, mrs Killer
B now I know that you didn'tlisten to me, so so we can talk
about that during honey talksnext time.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
So you guys know where we're going.
We're eating so much water.
Now, yeah, exactly, we'reeating so much water to sink.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
Yes, I got wot, wot, wot over here, not even on the
sound board.
Yeah, you didn't need it.
Yeah, no, that's great.
That's great.
No, it's a, it is.
It's important to see Fated.
Come on down, man.
Come on down.
If you got a question, come onup to the mic, man, you don't
have to raise your hand, justcome on down the mic and and uh
he's, he's unmuting himself.
Okay, cool, awesome.
(31:59):
Thanks for joining us.
Speaker 4 (32:00):
Fated hey good to see you, man, can you?
Speaker 1 (32:03):
hear me, we can hear, you, man, we can hear you man
Gotcha.
Speaker 4 (32:05):
I don't have a question.
I should have a statement.
I'm saying that I don't want tofeel like I'm sorry.
My biggest interview like tochange my family's life and
before I went there I listenedto your song.
I look at you because I was sonervous and I haven't been to an
interview like like 15 yearsfor a new job and I played that
song and it took a lot of weightoff of me and I got the job and
(32:28):
I just want to let you knowthat.
Thanks, man.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
So man, that's amazing.
Fated, what is a pop song?
Thank you, man.
Thank you so much.
That's awesome.
That's awesome, I love it.
Speaker 3 (32:38):
That's beautiful.
It's going to make me cry.
I listen.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
So just to let you know, you have the quest too,
and it is not good to cry onthose.
I mean, fated's probably like,he's probably got sponges.
He's coming out right now andtrying to just drip the tears
out Now.
I love that man.
Thank you so much, fated.
I love you, man.
It's not the first time.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
I've cried on a headset.
They'll be fine, don't worry,it's not.
Speaker 1 (32:58):
I won't, I won't.
We always ask our guests toshare, like, to kind of give us
like a closing thought, and Iwould like to ask you, I would
like to ask you, I guess, twothings Before you give us your
closing thought.
I always said, let me give youone more thing, but let me get
asked for two more things.
I'm always asking for a littlebit more.
So, no, I would like to ask you, what advice would you give to
(33:19):
someone who might be feelinglike they are beyond repair or
used up?
You know there's going to bepeople listening to the podcast.
What would you say to peoplethat's in the place where you
were before?
Speaker 3 (33:31):
You are not too broken, you're not too used up,
you are not too far gone.
You can always, always run toJesus, and sometimes I mean
first and foremost, run to Jesus.
He's listening, he's there, he.
You know like that's first andforemost.
And secondly, you probably havea lot more friends than you
(33:54):
think you do, and but even evenif you don't cry out to Jesus
and he will lead you to thosepeople, I truly believe that he
led me to those people and heled me to the right person to
help me, which ended up beingtherapy for, like I said, 18
months.
Speaker 1 (34:14):
If there's one thing that you would hope people would
take away with them tonight,what would it be?
Speaker 3 (34:22):
Kind of just what I said, like if you are struggling
with that, you know, I know noteverybody's struggling
constantly and some people arein better places in life
mentally and spiritually I knowI am than than what I was 10
years ago or even two years ago.
But sometimes you could bewalking along and then life just
throws you a curveball andsuddenly you feel like you're
(34:44):
right back at step.
It's like two steps forward, 14steps back.
You know, get back up and keepmoving.
There is a light at the end ofthe tunnel and even if you can't
see it, look for the pinhole,like look for it and keep
digging and keep moving.
It's worth it, the work isworth it.
Speaker 1 (35:05):
Thanks for tuning in to the Stories we Live podcast.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
And before you go make sure you hit that subscribe
button, and we'd love it if youwould leave us a review.
Popular Podcasts
United States of Kennedy
United States of Kennedy is a podcast about our cultural fascination with the Kennedy dynasty. Every week, hosts Lyra Smith and George Civeris go into one aspect of the Kennedy story.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com