July 9, 2024 • 32 mins
Text Brian & Shawna (Fan Mail)
Have you ever wondered how someone can transform immense personal trauma into a life of triumph and purpose? Our guest Bernice Loman takes us on a journey through her early struggles and the relentless faith that guided her to become a successful entrepreneur. From facing the harsh realities of poverty and walking the streets at night with her mentally ill mother, Bernice's story is a compelling testament to the power of resilience and faith.
You won't want to miss hearing about the pivotal moment that changed everything for Bernice. Frustrated with a series of unsatisfying jobs, she decided to pursue higher education and embark on a path of self-discovery. This led to the founding of Loman Creative Services, where she now blends her passion for ministry with innovative technology to serve faith communities. Her insights on balancing personal passion with professional obligations provide valuable lessons for any aspiring entrepreneur.
Finally, we dive into the realities of entrepreneurial life, shedding light on both its challenges and rewards. From the struggle of integrating technology into traditional faith settings to the joy of flexible schedules and travel opportunities, Bernice shares the wisdom she's gained along the way. This episode is a powerful reminder that faith and perseverance can create incredible opportunities, no matter where you start. Join us and be inspired by Bernice's unwavering dedication to her calling and her remarkable journey from trauma to triumph.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Before I was in my mother's womb.
I'm a product of rape my mother.
She was diagnosed with bipolarand schizophrenia.
She was going back and forthfrom mental institutions.
So many people were telling herto abort me.
Even the doctor and she saidGod told her to keep me.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Welcome to the New Horizons podcast.
I'm Brian Curee.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
And I'm Shauna Curee, also known as Mr and Mrs Killer
Bee, in virtual reality.
So this podcast is recordedlive from the metaverse at the
Killer Bee Studios where reallife stories and God experiences
are shared in a way only themetaverse can offer.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
With that, let's go ahead and dive into today's
episode.
Well, bernice, we're so happyto be here.
We're so thrilled to be here.
I would love like the way welike to start off all the events
is just kind of ask our gueststo take about 30 seconds and
tell everybody a little bitabout who you are.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Yeah, so you mentioned I was an entrepreneur.
I'm from North Carolina, butnow I live in Savannah Georgia,
so hopefully I definitely sharedthat transition and what
transpired from there.
I mean, I'm a woman of faith, Ilove God and I love people.
I love music, ministry andministry as a whole, and I just
(01:21):
love connecting with people andhelping people through their
entrepreneurship journey.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Can you explain?
Some people might be listeningLike well, what is ministry?
What does she mean by thatServing I?
Speaker 1 (01:30):
love serving people.
I am a minister of music at mychurch.
I serve at a beautiful Zionchurch in here in.
Savannah, Georgia yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
And.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
I also help with youth, youth ministry and also
with media, so a little bit ofeverything and just helping Like
.
Even this week I was helpserving, teaching the teens.
We had a vacation Bible schoolthis week, so it was very
exciting.
When I think of ministry, Ijust think of serving, you know
serving and helping Perfect wayto put it.
(02:01):
Yeah, helping and helping peopleget better.
Yeah, I was listening to aprior podcast that you guys had
and you were sharing about.
This podcast is to share yourstory and to make people better,
and so, yeah, just make peoplebetter, you know.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
So, bernice, yeah, I would love to.
I know your story.
You've overcome some, somechallenges and circumstances in
your life.
Can you take us back to thattime and share what were the
challenges that you faced?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Yeah, I can take you all the way back Before I was in
my mother's womb.
I'm a product of rape my mother.
She was diagnosed with bipolarand schizophrenia she was
diagnosed with bipolar andschizophrenia, and at the early
age of 17 and going forward to23, she was going back and forth
(02:54):
from mental institutions.
At the age of 23, she was rapedand there were people, even in
the family and peoplesurrounding her was telling her
because of her circumstance shewasn't mentally capable to have
a child, which was me.
And so, so many people weretelling her to abort me.
(03:16):
And she said God told her tokeep me.
And and I'm I mean even now,think about it.
I'm like I mean just to see herlife now and how she is going
through life.
I know is nobody but God thatallowed her to allow me to live.
She said even in the hospitalthey were still convincing her.
(03:40):
She said even the doctor wastelling her, because of her
condition and how she wasn'table to articulate and do things
responsibly for herself, thatthey were even encouraging her
to you know, abort me.
And she said there was thislady at this hospital and the
lady told her, said no, she iskeeping her daughter and if I
(04:04):
have to help her, I willremember this lady to this day.
She's an angel.
Even now she prays with me.
Her name is Tanya.
I remember even her son.
Her son name is Charles um,because they were in the
hospital giving birth at thesame time.
Charles birthday is Septemberthe 8th and mine is September
(04:24):
the 7th.
And so, yeah, I mean even I wasgoing to say, even before my
mother's womb, like I have astory.
How a story of resilience, ofstory of you know, keep going in
spite of people, people, justthe odds.
You know cause we struggle inthe house.
(04:45):
We we went through a.
I was a single um.
I was a child in a single parenthome and watching my mom trying
to go through life, trying tofigure out life as a bipolar and
schizophrenic person.
I remember, even at midnight,sometimes two or three, in
walking the streets with my mombecause she didn't know
(05:07):
sometimes how to get back home,like I went through that moment
of even not even having food,not even having food Glad to go
to school to have a meal and tocome home hungry.
I remember all of that.
I went through so much povertyand watching my mom just
maneuvering through life, goingthrough mental institutions back
and forth.
(05:27):
My aunt and my uncle would comeand try to step in and I would
stay with them because my momwas in mental institutions,
institutions watching her.
I mean really I have a storyand I mean overall, as I see it,
like I know Brian and Mrs KellyB see it like I know brian and
(05:48):
um this is kelly b, I know is.
I know it's god, I know it'sgod that has um allowed me to go
through life and that's mystory and how even that and
someone asking aboutentrepreneurship like that came
later in life you know um.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
So it's definitely god at that time, at that time,
going through that, how did youfeel?
At that time Did you know itwas God?
Then, at that time, did you notrealize that Great question.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
So I learned about God when I was about five or six
years old.
Although my mom went throughthat, she stayed in church and
that's how I was able to watch awoman of faith, to watch her
relationship with God,regardless of what happened.
(06:30):
Her going back and forth frommental institutions, her you
know her.
I'm watching her mood swings,like I'm watching her cry one
moment and then I'm watching herangry and then I'm watching her
like really sad and low.
Imagine that now me at likefive or six, trying to help her,
(06:51):
like God is going to help youand going through that.
And you know, I've seen thechanges with medicine and
everything now because oftechnology, but then it
definitely is not like now.
And so I just watched thechanges.
And so, to answer your question,yes, for years I've known that
(07:15):
God had a play in it, becauseshe will always take me to
church, like I've always heard.
You know, I've always heard theword of God.
Didn't always understand it,but I knew I had to get saved,
because we had somebody atchurch and say, if you don't get
saved, you're going to go tohell.
So you know.
So I always had that fear ofGod some way or the other.
(07:40):
So, yeah, I for years I'veknown God had a play in some of
this.
Because I was, I was accustomedto going to church, I was a
church baby, like I've, I've.
I was in church for a whileyears.
So, yeah, definitely, I grew up, I was born in church.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Well, I could see, I could see, like I could see,
probably a lot of people.
You that don't understand.
You know god in that way yeahcould look at those
circumstances and think like how, how can you say god was in
this?
Uh, how would you respond tosomebody like that?
Speaker 1 (08:17):
yeah, I've had moments now let me, let's, let
me keep that real now.
I have had moments, especiallywhen because I told you my mom,
we went through poverty, my momwas going through bipolar
schizophrenia so she didn'tdrive.
We literally would walk tochurch many times and I would
see people that were going tothe same church pass us by and I
(08:40):
would get so angry with God?
Like God, how not Like.
I literally used to tell God Ihated him because I couldn't see
how we would be walking to thechurch and how faithful my mom
would be paying tithes.
Yet I come home sometimes andthere's a hole in the floor.
I remember being in a bed andseeing a snake come from the
(09:03):
hole right on my gosh.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
No, we'd be moving right down.
I'd be like, nope, we're out ofhere, we're going yeah yeah, so
I'm.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
I'm literally, you know, imagine going through
seeing all of this like we wouldsee snakes, like like all the
time because of the holes in thefloor and not having food.
So I'm literally seeing all of.
But I'm going to a church whenpeople saying God will supply
and provide, I was angry withGod for a while.
So listen, don't say I alwaysfelt like this.
(09:32):
So if you you've ever been likethat, I can.
I can totally relate.
It didn't take it, it only tooka personal relationship.
Got like I literally one day, Iremember, in my room, like God,
if you are real, you have gotto show yourself, because this
does not look like you, thisdoes not look like you, like we
(09:52):
are struggling, we are walkingto church, people are, you know,
passing us by, we need help andI just don't see you.
And that's when the personalrelationship I would literally
feel God in my room, like it wasso tangible and it wasn't until
a personal relationship.
So what?
I would definitely advisesomebody.
You are not alone Because,trust me, I've been there plenty
(10:14):
of times.
Like God, I can't see you, Likethis is not you.
I mean, you got to show yourselfto me and it only took a
personal relationship, so Iwould definitely, you know, tell
people, you know, seek thatencounter with God, seek that
encounter with the Holy Spirit,because it's not until then that
God will truly be real to you.
(10:34):
If not, you're just listeningto others.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I think it's a beautiful thing that you're
sharing that too, about you know, when it comes to you getting
to the point where you realizethat, about God, is it?
It was it took seeking, it tookthat relationship, which takes
time.
It takes time building arelationship, takes time really
leaning into him.
But I think it's beautiful thatyou shared the real side of
your frustrations too, becauseGod's bigger than that, like God
(11:00):
, god can handle that.
It took me a while to realizethat too, like God can handle me
getting upset and frustratedand not understanding, because
he knows that we can'tcomprehend or comprehend what
he's doing.
And he's bigger than ourcircumstances.
But that's hard for us to seewhen we especially when we
haven't we don't have thatrelationship with God yet.
(11:21):
So I'm so glad that you sharedthat, bernice, thank you so much
.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
And you know, when you were talking I was thinking
too.
That's when a lot of my writingcame, because sometimes I
didn't have the words to evenverbally express, so I would
write letters to God and myletters became sometimes songs
and poetry, and that's where themusic ministry was.
Were were birthed literallyaround eight years old.
Um, I had learned how to learnmelody and start playing and
(11:53):
writing.
Um, I would play the drums andthe keyboard.
That's where all of that came,literally through my struggle,
and just writing, um, writing a,a letter to God and letters to
God, yeah, I love it.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
That's beautiful.
You know you're an entrepreneurnow and what was the turning
point that caused you to realizethat that's the path you wanted
to go down?
Because, I mean, you had tofeel like the odds were against
you.
I mean, if this is the you'regrowing up with holes in the
floors and snakes, I mean Iwould be like I'm probably going
to be like a what do you callthose pest control where I'm out
killing snakes.
That's what I'm like, that'swhat my career path is.
(12:26):
Maybe.
Maybe that is yourentrepreneurship, maybe you are,
maybe you are a pest.
Nothing is wrong with it, I amso grateful for pest control
people, because that can leadyou to that decision.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
So All right.
So let me see, I'm going to tryto condense this Right.
Let me see I'm gonna try tocondense this right.
So that went through.
I mean I went through that allthrough high school, all through
middle school, all through allelementary, all of the years,
and I would have my mother andmy uncle and my aunt that would
say you need to go to college,and I told them that I struggled
(13:00):
, so we struggled so much.
I just wanted to get a job sothat I can have my own money, so
that I can like I mean I wantedmy car.
I went to man, I had a whiteFord Escort, y'all.
I went and got my first car.
I mean it was like so amazingand but I realized it was.
(13:23):
I mean I was going through jobfrom job to job and it just
seems like it wasn't enough,like I, I mean I wanted to do
more.
I was creative, I just wantedto do so much more.
And back then, um, uh, what wasit?
My space was like really a bigthing.
I started learning a code.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
You're telling your age.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
now, bernice, you're telling your age, I was learning
to code and I wanted to buildwebsites and social media pages
and things like that.
I really felt like that wassomething that I truly love to
do, but I just it was a prayer,it really was a prayer Like I
had went through so much, goingthrough from job to job, and
(14:07):
then, in fact, I had stoppedgoing to church.
At one point.
I was mad at God.
I mean, I was going, I hadaccepted God and then I was like
, oh no, I'm getting older, thisis something I just wanted.
My mom was so strict.
I'm like man, let me, let me,let me go get a job.
My mom was so strict.
I'm like man, let me, let me,let me go get a job, let me just
(14:27):
go from job.
I was going to job, going fromjob to job, and I mean, it was
just so much.
And I just felt like my turningpoint at one point was I was a
creative, I was an entrepreneur.
I just felt it within.
I just wanted to.
I wanted to do somethingdifferent.
I don't know if anybody evercan relate to that.
Like you, as you're doing it,you're going through with
everything, but it's you.
Just know in you you it'ssomething different that you
(14:50):
must do.
And that was my turning point,literally with prayer, I prayed.
I just felt like it was where,where I was.
It was just so it was.
It was painful.
I remember going to a job andliterally when I got there I
went to the bathroom and criedlike I was so depressed and I
(15:11):
just asked God like what is itthat?
You know what had me to do?
I had to reassess that.
I had to ask him back into mylife, like it, because it was
just so much and where I feltthat I was trying to trying to
go and trying to do it reallywasn't working.
So I'm like God, this is.
I'm just so frustrated.
(15:32):
Frustration and irritation wasmy turning point.
Like I got to do something, gotmy bachelor's degree.
At that time I went back, Iwent to college, um, got from
there, went and even got mymaster's.
So God gave me another chanceto do what I felt like I should
have done and from there I waslike OK, I started working more,
(15:55):
so in the health field, believeit or not.
In fact, my concentration Ihave an MBA, I have a master's
in business, but myconcentration is health
administration and I was doing alot of great things with the
managerial side of health care.
But then I realized OK, I onlychose that, though, because of
(16:15):
the money.
Speaker 3 (16:17):
And so really what I?
Speaker 1 (16:18):
wanted to do was what I'm doing now, and that was my
turning point.
Like, okay, I'm going to stepout, I'm going to step out.
Even with a nine to five I hadstepped out and to start a
company Loman Creative Servicesand the rest is history.
We could talk about that fromthere, but that was my turning
point.
That really was just anirritation, like there's more.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
I can't.
I just I didn't feel like itwas the place for me.
Um, did you, did you strugglewith realizing this is what?
This is what you wanted withyour past?
Was there things that creepedin that kind of like would get
in your own mind to try to holdyou back?
Speaker 1 (16:57):
no, unless I'm unaware, but that's awesome.
I love that, no, no, not at all.
In fact, um, most time I talkabout my past or opportunities
like this, or opportunities tominister to someone, um, usually
I'm just stepping forward,moving forward to, you know,
great things that God has for me, for the business in my life.
(17:19):
Um, so much ahead and um, yeah,that's pretty.
I don't even think too much ofthe past.
Only, you know, like, like Isaid, opportunities like this,
and then when I meet someone Ican tell God releases me to
express things that I've gonethrough for his glory, you know,
um, but yeah, yeah, it soundsto me like sounds to me like
(17:43):
somehow you've been able to takethose struggles from the past
and let them make you a strongerperson, a more resilient person
.
Yeah, I really think so I reallythink so, Because when I think
of when I, when I just look nowand how he's allowed me to
travel and speak and all thosegreat things, yeah, I really
(18:08):
feel like it's the strength.
Definitely it has some way ofconnecting from the past because
of what I've gone through and Iguess inside I'm like no, I'm
not going back to that.
God have your way.
I'm not going back to snakes,god you know.
(18:28):
You know, but yeah, I think youknow somehow, yeah, there's a,
there's some kind of connectionthere where there's a resilience
and there's a push to know that, yeah, God has something
greater.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Oh, I love it.
I love it.
Thank you, bernice, for sharingthat.
I love that.
I love Ms Kilbreed you pointedthat out because yeah, I mean, I
mean she knows like I'm anentrepreneur and there's things
that's in my past that hasactually passed, things that
have kind of held me back inways like I had to get past and
it was so hard, and sometimesthose things can creep in even
today.
So I love hearing this side ofit.
(19:04):
I see that we have text.
Paps has something that hewould like to share.
If you want to bring up the mic.
Speaker 3 (19:08):
I've often said that the same things that will crush
one person will cause the nextperson to succeed.
That being said and you kind ofalluded to it, but knowing that
the odds were stacked againstyou, knowing the struggles you
faced, what was it that made youfeel you'd succeed, or did it
even matter?
Speaker 1 (19:27):
I'm a risk taker yeah .
I think, with everything that Iand that goes back to Mrs Killer
Bee question I think because ofmy past it has made me a risk
taker.
I've noticed that with me I'm abig risk taker.
Yeah, like the one pastor toldme recently.
We talked about it before butone of the Kenya African pastors
(19:50):
.
He said when I went the veryfirst time I went by myself.
I had never met them likephysically.
I just knew that God hadconnected me to help them with.
It was a connection, and theysaid they look, when I finally
arrived they was like wow, shegot big faith.
She's a risk taker.
(20:11):
Cause I didn't have a team to gowith me at that time they just
started going with me.
But, yeah, I think, yeah, texas, I think, yeah, I look at it
now.
Yeah, I'm a risk, definitely arisk taker.
God leads me.
I ask him to lead me Like Icannot.
I'm like God.
I talk to him so real God, Ican't make this without you.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
You got to help me today.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
Like for real God.
You got to help me and that hastruly like God has truly helped
me.
That has truly helped me and Ido believe, of course, also just
knowing my past and what I'vegone through has allowed me to
be, you know, a risk taker.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
So yeah, and if he told you to do it, he's going to
see it through, right.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Yeah, I believe it.
Awesome, Awesome.
Thank you, absolutely.
Thank you, tex-fab.
(21:28):
Thank you.
I've had moments where I'veinterviewed entrepreneurs and I
would listen to a lot of theirstories and they would say, oh,
my father or my mother is abusiness owner and I've had
people that I've never had thatstory like literally, and I
would often think, like man,what would it be like?
Because, like I said, I'm aproduct of rape, like my dad.
My mom told me about him.
In fact, their family likedenied me for so long.
I'm going to tell you hismother told my mom do not tell
(21:49):
anybody what happened becausethey were afraid that he would
get locked up and it will be somuch like literally.
My mom went through momentswhere she didn't even tell many
people literally what happenedand so she went through that
moment.
I'm telling you when mygrandmother, my dad's mother
y'all hear this my dad's mother,my mom, said she took me as a
(22:14):
little baby, took me therebecause they still was saying my
mom was lying, that he didn'tdo it, and said they stripped
all my clothes off and says weneed to see if she has any
features like my, like us or myson till this day.
This is how I know about my oneof my toes looks just like my
(22:38):
dad.
They looked at my show and saidthat baby toe looks just like
Charles, which is my dad, andit's crazy.
But literally to this daythat's how I know some
resemblance of him.
And they said that I walk likehim because they took all my
clothes off, didn Didn't believemy mom.
And yeah, so little.
(23:01):
And I tell y'all, guys, I got astory.
I'm talking about my granddad.
When we went there one time mymom said he shot at us, he was
trying to kill us.
They didn't like us.
I'm y'all, I'm telling y'alllike this podcast would have to
be episode five.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Season eight.
Now everybody, you know what'sbeautiful Bernice.
It's like you know, I heareverything that you're saying
too, and it is like you knowdifferent entrepreneurs have
went through different you knowthey've had different lives.
You know you're saying like Idon't know, like what would it
be like if I had a father?
But I think the beautiful thingis that you actually did have a
father and you do.
(23:41):
You just didn't realize who thatwas until later, and I think
that's part of where well,you've made it clear, that's
where your faith is reallylining.
I mean, to be an entrepreneur,you have to be a risk taker, you
have to be right.
I mean Mrs Killer being aswe've taken a lot of risk and
she's actually been there tohelp, support me and has kind of
(24:02):
helped me at times and saidlet's look at, let's look at
what's the worst thing that canhappen.
If this doesn't, succeed and I'mlike, oh, ok, and it's great to
have support from a spouse or afriend or a loved one, somebody
that you can lean to, but youhave God that's doing that with
you too, and that's a beautifulthing, like you know, no matter
what God's with you, even ifthings you know.
(24:24):
We look at the story ofShadrach, meshach and Abednego.
You know, when it came to thefaith it was, you know, they
were being thrown into thefurnace, to the fire, but they
said, you know, they believedGod was going to deliver them.
But they said, even if hedoesn't, they had understanding.
No matter what way it went, godhad a purpose for it.
And those that don't know thestory he did take them through
(24:45):
the fire.
You know they didn't get even ascent or even didn't even smell
like smoke when he came out.
So but that's kind of likethat's the father that you have
as you're stepping out and doingmore and more as an
entrepreneur.
So it's beautiful.
It's beautiful to hear yourstory and I would.
So I want to ask you somethingbecause, as we're talking about
(25:05):
entrepreneurship, I know and youprobably have the same thing as
your social media feed I'mgoing to ask this as like a
personal question Is your socialmedia feed filled with
entrepreneur stuff?
Because mine is.
That's all I see.
Okay, that's all you see, right?
If you're all I see, okay,that's all you see, right.
If you're an entrepreneur,that's what all you see every
time you open up social media.
If you take care of plants,like mrs killer b, that's all
she sees is all plants.
(25:26):
Uh, I'm sure everybody herecould probably share what their
feed is.
Um, but what I want to ask youlet me tell you this, though
recently.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
So my mom loves animals, oh I mean all sorts of
animals.
So every time I see a reelabout animals, anything funny, I
try to lighten up her day so Iwould share it with her.
Well, I guess, because ofalgorithms, all I'm seeing a lot
of times is monkeys gorillas,oh my god it was just for my mom
(25:57):
oh my gosh you show interest inone thing and it is over, right
, like I'm constantly seeingLike, so every day I'm sharing
it to her.
Like okay, here's a video of acat and a gorilla.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
Yes, you know, we might have some people that's
listening to this podcast toothat are like, yeah, I want to
be an entrepreneur, just like Iwant to ask you this, because
entrepreneur life, especially onsocial media, can look very
glamorous, glamorous you know.
So I want to ask you this,because I know there's
challenges in that as well whathas been like, what's been a
(26:30):
challenge for you as anentrepreneur that you had to
move beyond?
Speaker 1 (26:34):
One of the challenge is I have a passion to help
ministries and I believe thatone of the challenges has been,
because I have a passion to helpministries, a lot of ministries
don't see the need fortechnology and it is like a hard
push.
(26:54):
And it is like a hard push so Iwent through so much of a
challenge of we have theservices but we also want to
serve and help ministries aswell.
So, like getting past that pushto also help those in the faith
community because our valuealso is faith and I mean I
(27:18):
boldly share.
We are Christian business ownerwith Christian business.
We have a Christian businessfellowship network.
So, yeah, that's been one ofthe challenges for me.
Like to get that balance.
Like I'm I'm I'm in ministry,right, I'm also ordained
minister, right, so I'm aminister, I love music ministry,
(27:39):
I love serving people andhelping people and I see the
need to help with ministries andI have the services.
But a lot of times theseministers and ministries don't
see the need for the service.
And so it's kind of like oh man,but I love to serve in this
area too.
So, yeah, that's been, that'sbeen one of the challenges.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Your heart is you want to help.
Your heart is to help.
We'll definitely be praying foryou about that too, Cause I
think that's it's definitely aheavy thing to carry.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
It is a challenge.
Especially, you know God hascalled you to help a certain
group too, especially you know,God has called you to help a
certain group too.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
I think that that's where it comes like with
ministry is is helping them seethat the value is the people.
It's not about, like thedifferent technologies, but it's
the people on the other side.
I think that, you know, we'vekind of went into this, this era
where even on social media,people are looked at as numbers,
like they want to see morenumbers, more views.
But it's not about the morenumbers.
These are real people on theother side of social media, on
(28:43):
the other side of these avatars.
These are all real people thatwe're connecting with, and less
is more.
We can go deeper.
Me and Mrs Killer Bee arereading a book right now, called
One at a Time, and it's abouthow Jesus zoomed in on.
He did a like a zoom lens.
Whenever anything was happeningaround crowds, he would zoom in
(29:03):
and be present with that oneperson.
Everything else became a blur.
It's hard to remember that andthink about that approach in
this kind of culture that we'rein, you know, but that's a great
thing, is like you'd love beingan entrepreneur, because
because of the freedom, probablyright.
You love being an entrepreneurbecause, because of the freedom?
Speaker 1 (29:21):
probably Right, yeah, I love the freedom.
You know when, even when I,even before that God had told me
that he wanted to use me morewith traveling and speaking and
helping leaders, whether theywere ministry and business, and
also with music ministry and sohe literally showed me and told
me, like literally what I'mdoing now.
God had already showed it to me, he prepared me for it.
(29:43):
So, yeah, it's the freedom.
Like I'm going to see my momnext week.
I blocked my schedule Like Ididn't have to ask nobody, Like
literally, you know.
I blocked my schedule so I cango see my mom.
You know just the freedom ofthat.
And if I get tired, like all myMondays are off, I take a rest
(30:06):
on Mondays.
You know, it's definitely.
Although it's a challenge, ithas its great benefits.
Like I travel across thecountry.
I travel across the country.
I could block, maneuver myschedule, connect with the team
and help them train them so Ican do what I do as well.
So it's I mean it's definitelygreat.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
That's amazing.
That's amazing.
Well, I'm going to ask you twoquestions before we wrap up.
Miss Kilbrey, did you haveanything?
Speaker 3 (30:33):
good.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Go right ahead.
So I'm going to ask you twoquestions.
The first one I'm going to askyou is what you know, what would
you tell your younger self ifyou had an opportunity, Like, if
there's something that you'velearned, if you could go back
and give yourself the youngerversion?
Of you some advice?
What would it be?
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Start a business early, oh yeah, much earlier
than I did.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
If there was one takeaway that you would hope
people would walk away withtoday, what would that be?
Speaker 1 (31:01):
In spite of your past , look to God, pray, have a
personal relationship with God.
You know, it wasn't until I hadthat personal encounter with
him that he was then real to me,in spite of what I went through
with church and everything.
It wasn't until then.
So, yes, get a personalencounter with God, holy Spirit,
(31:23):
and, in spite of your past,move forward.
You're resilient, just goforward.
Go for what you want to do,what God has called you to do.
You can do it.
Allow your gifts to make roomfor you.
If you enjoyed this episodedon't forget to follow this
podcast and leave us a review.
Before I was in my mother's womb.
I'm a product of rape my mother.
She was diagnosed with bipolarand schizophrenia.
She was going back and forthfrom mental institutions.
So many people were telling herto abort me.
Even the doctor and she saidGod told her to keep me.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Welcome to the New Horizons podcast.
I'm Brian Curee.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
And I'm Shauna Curee, also known as Mr and Mrs Killer
Bee, in virtual reality.
So this podcast is recordedlive from the metaverse at the
Killer Bee Studios where reallife stories and God experiences
are shared in a way only themetaverse can offer.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
With that, let's go ahead and dive into today's
episode.
Well, bernice, we're so happyto be here.
We're so thrilled to be here.
I would love like the way welike to start off all the events
is just kind of ask our gueststo take about 30 seconds and
tell everybody a little bitabout who you are.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Yeah, so you mentioned I was an entrepreneur.
I'm from North Carolina, butnow I live in Savannah Georgia,
so hopefully I definitely sharedthat transition and what
transpired from there.
I mean, I'm a woman of faith, Ilove God and I love people.
I love music, ministry andministry as a whole, and I just
(01:21):
love connecting with people andhelping people through their
entrepreneurship journey.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
Can you explain?
Some people might be listeningLike well, what is ministry?
What does she mean by thatServing I?
Speaker 1 (01:30):
love serving people.
I am a minister of music at mychurch.
I serve at a beautiful Zionchurch in here in.
Savannah, Georgia yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
And.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
I also help with youth, youth ministry and also
with media, so a little bit ofeverything and just helping Like
.
Even this week I was helpserving, teaching the teens.
We had a vacation Bible schoolthis week, so it was very
exciting.
When I think of ministry, Ijust think of serving, you know
serving and helping Perfect wayto put it.
(02:01):
Yeah, helping and helping peopleget better.
Yeah, I was listening to aprior podcast that you guys had
and you were sharing about.
This podcast is to share yourstory and to make people better,
and so, yeah, just make peoplebetter, you know.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
So, bernice, yeah, I would love to.
I know your story.
You've overcome some, somechallenges and circumstances in
your life.
Can you take us back to thattime and share what were the
challenges that you faced?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Yeah, I can take you all the way back Before I was in
my mother's womb.
I'm a product of rape my mother.
She was diagnosed with bipolarand schizophrenia she was
diagnosed with bipolar andschizophrenia, and at the early
age of 17 and going forward to23, she was going back and forth
(02:54):
from mental institutions.
At the age of 23, she was rapedand there were people, even in
the family and peoplesurrounding her was telling her
because of her circumstance shewasn't mentally capable to have
a child, which was me.
And so, so many people weretelling her to abort me.
(03:16):
And she said God told her tokeep me.
And and I'm I mean even now,think about it.
I'm like I mean just to see herlife now and how she is going
through life.
I know is nobody but God thatallowed her to allow me to live.
She said even in the hospitalthey were still convincing her.
(03:40):
She said even the doctor wastelling her, because of her
condition and how she wasn'table to articulate and do things
responsibly for herself, thatthey were even encouraging her
to you know, abort me.
And she said there was thislady at this hospital and the
lady told her, said no, she iskeeping her daughter and if I
(04:04):
have to help her, I willremember this lady to this day.
She's an angel.
Even now she prays with me.
Her name is Tanya.
I remember even her son.
Her son name is Charles um,because they were in the
hospital giving birth at thesame time.
Charles birthday is Septemberthe 8th and mine is September
(04:24):
the 7th.
And so, yeah, I mean even I wasgoing to say, even before my
mother's womb, like I have astory.
How a story of resilience, ofstory of you know, keep going in
spite of people, people, justthe odds.
You know cause we struggle inthe house.
(04:45):
We we went through a.
I was a single um.
I was a child in a single parenthome and watching my mom trying
to go through life, trying tofigure out life as a bipolar and
schizophrenic person.
I remember, even at midnight,sometimes two or three, in
walking the streets with my mombecause she didn't know
(05:07):
sometimes how to get back home,like I went through that moment
of even not even having food,not even having food Glad to go
to school to have a meal and tocome home hungry.
I remember all of that.
I went through so much povertyand watching my mom just
maneuvering through life, goingthrough mental institutions back
and forth.
(05:27):
My aunt and my uncle would comeand try to step in and I would
stay with them because my momwas in mental institutions,
institutions watching her.
I mean really I have a storyand I mean overall, as I see it,
like I know Brian and Mrs KellyB see it like I know brian and
(05:48):
um this is kelly b, I know is.
I know it's god, I know it'sgod that has um allowed me to go
through life and that's mystory and how even that and
someone asking aboutentrepreneurship like that came
later in life you know um.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
So it's definitely god at that time, at that time,
going through that, how did youfeel?
At that time Did you know itwas God?
Then, at that time, did you notrealize that Great question.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
So I learned about God when I was about five or six
years old.
Although my mom went throughthat, she stayed in church and
that's how I was able to watch awoman of faith, to watch her
relationship with God,regardless of what happened.
(06:30):
Her going back and forth frommental institutions, her you
know her.
I'm watching her mood swings,like I'm watching her cry one
moment and then I'm watching herangry and then I'm watching her
like really sad and low.
Imagine that now me at likefive or six, trying to help her,
(06:51):
like God is going to help youand going through that.
And you know, I've seen thechanges with medicine and
everything now because oftechnology, but then it
definitely is not like now.
And so I just watched thechanges.
And so, to answer your question,yes, for years I've known that
(07:15):
God had a play in it, becauseshe will always take me to
church, like I've always heard.
You know, I've always heard theword of God.
Didn't always understand it,but I knew I had to get saved,
because we had somebody atchurch and say, if you don't get
saved, you're going to go tohell.
So you know.
So I always had that fear ofGod some way or the other.
(07:40):
So, yeah, I for years I'veknown God had a play in some of
this.
Because I was, I was accustomedto going to church, I was a
church baby, like I've, I've.
I was in church for a whileyears.
So, yeah, definitely, I grew up, I was born in church.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
Well, I could see, I could see, like I could see,
probably a lot of people.
You that don't understand.
You know god in that way yeahcould look at those
circumstances and think like how, how can you say god was in
this?
Uh, how would you respond tosomebody like that?
Speaker 1 (08:17):
yeah, I've had moments now let me, let's, let
me keep that real now.
I have had moments, especiallywhen because I told you my mom,
we went through poverty, my momwas going through bipolar
schizophrenia so she didn'tdrive.
We literally would walk tochurch many times and I would
see people that were going tothe same church pass us by and I
(08:40):
would get so angry with God?
Like God, how not Like.
I literally used to tell God Ihated him because I couldn't see
how we would be walking to thechurch and how faithful my mom
would be paying tithes.
Yet I come home sometimes andthere's a hole in the floor.
I remember being in a bed andseeing a snake come from the
(09:03):
hole right on my gosh.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
No, we'd be moving right down.
I'd be like, nope, we're out ofhere, we're going yeah yeah, so
I'm.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
I'm literally, you know, imagine going through
seeing all of this like we wouldsee snakes, like like all the
time because of the holes in thefloor and not having food.
So I'm literally seeing all of.
But I'm going to a church whenpeople saying God will supply
and provide, I was angry withGod for a while.
So listen, don't say I alwaysfelt like this.
(09:32):
So if you you've ever been likethat, I can.
I can totally relate.
It didn't take it, it only tooka personal relationship.
Got like I literally one day, Iremember, in my room, like God,
if you are real, you have gotto show yourself, because this
does not look like you, thisdoes not look like you, like we
(09:52):
are struggling, we are walkingto church, people are, you know,
passing us by, we need help andI just don't see you.
And that's when the personalrelationship I would literally
feel God in my room, like it wasso tangible and it wasn't until
a personal relationship.
So what?
I would definitely advisesomebody.
You are not alone Because,trust me, I've been there plenty
(10:14):
of times.
Like God, I can't see you, Likethis is not you.
I mean, you got to show yourselfto me and it only took a
personal relationship, so Iwould definitely, you know, tell
people, you know, seek thatencounter with God, seek that
encounter with the Holy Spirit,because it's not until then that
God will truly be real to you.
(10:34):
If not, you're just listeningto others.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I think it's a beautiful thing that you're
sharing that too, about you know, when it comes to you getting
to the point where you realizethat, about God, is it?
It was it took seeking, it tookthat relationship, which takes
time.
It takes time building arelationship, takes time really
leaning into him.
But I think it's beautiful thatyou shared the real side of
your frustrations too, becauseGod's bigger than that, like God
(11:00):
, god can handle that.
It took me a while to realizethat too, like God can handle me
getting upset and frustratedand not understanding, because
he knows that we can'tcomprehend or comprehend what
he's doing.
And he's bigger than ourcircumstances.
But that's hard for us to seewhen we especially when we
haven't we don't have thatrelationship with God yet.
(11:21):
So I'm so glad that you sharedthat, bernice, thank you so much
.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
And you know, when you were talking I was thinking
too.
That's when a lot of my writingcame, because sometimes I
didn't have the words to evenverbally express, so I would
write letters to God and myletters became sometimes songs
and poetry, and that's where themusic ministry was.
Were were birthed literallyaround eight years old.
Um, I had learned how to learnmelody and start playing and
(11:53):
writing.
Um, I would play the drums andthe keyboard.
That's where all of that came,literally through my struggle,
and just writing, um, writing a,a letter to God and letters to
God, yeah, I love it.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
That's beautiful.
You know you're an entrepreneurnow and what was the turning
point that caused you to realizethat that's the path you wanted
to go down?
Because, I mean, you had tofeel like the odds were against
you.
I mean, if this is the you'regrowing up with holes in the
floors and snakes, I mean Iwould be like I'm probably going
to be like a what do you callthose pest control where I'm out
killing snakes.
That's what I'm like, that'swhat my career path is.
(12:26):
Maybe.
Maybe that is yourentrepreneurship, maybe you are,
maybe you are a pest.
Nothing is wrong with it, I amso grateful for pest control
people, because that can leadyou to that decision.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
So All right.
So let me see, I'm going to tryto condense this Right.
Let me see I'm gonna try tocondense this right.
So that went through.
I mean I went through that allthrough high school, all through
middle school, all through allelementary, all of the years,
and I would have my mother andmy uncle and my aunt that would
say you need to go to college,and I told them that I struggled
(13:00):
, so we struggled so much.
I just wanted to get a job sothat I can have my own money, so
that I can like I mean I wantedmy car.
I went to man, I had a whiteFord Escort, y'all.
I went and got my first car.
I mean it was like so amazingand but I realized it was.
(13:23):
I mean I was going through jobfrom job to job and it just
seems like it wasn't enough,like I, I mean I wanted to do
more.
I was creative, I just wantedto do so much more.
And back then, um, uh, what wasit?
My space was like really a bigthing.
I started learning a code.
Speaker 2 (13:44):
You're telling your age.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
now, bernice, you're telling your age, I was learning
to code and I wanted to buildwebsites and social media pages
and things like that.
I really felt like that wassomething that I truly love to
do, but I just it was a prayer,it really was a prayer Like I
had went through so much, goingthrough from job to job, and
(14:07):
then, in fact, I had stoppedgoing to church.
At one point.
I was mad at God.
I mean, I was going, I hadaccepted God and then I was like
, oh no, I'm getting older, thisis something I just wanted.
My mom was so strict.
I'm like man, let me, let me,let me go get a job.
My mom was so strict.
I'm like man, let me, let me,let me go get a job, let me just
(14:27):
go from job.
I was going to job, going fromjob to job, and I mean, it was
just so much.
And I just felt like my turningpoint at one point was I was a
creative, I was an entrepreneur.
I just felt it within.
I just wanted to.
I wanted to do somethingdifferent.
I don't know if anybody evercan relate to that.
Like you, as you're doing it,you're going through with
everything, but it's you.
Just know in you you it'ssomething different that you
(14:50):
must do.
And that was my turning point,literally with prayer, I prayed.
I just felt like it was where,where I was.
It was just so it was.
It was painful.
I remember going to a job andliterally when I got there I
went to the bathroom and criedlike I was so depressed and I
(15:11):
just asked God like what is itthat?
You know what had me to do?
I had to reassess that.
I had to ask him back into mylife, like it, because it was
just so much and where I feltthat I was trying to trying to
go and trying to do it reallywasn't working.
So I'm like God, this is.
I'm just so frustrated.
(15:32):
Frustration and irritation wasmy turning point.
Like I got to do something, gotmy bachelor's degree.
At that time I went back, Iwent to college, um, got from
there, went and even got mymaster's.
So God gave me another chanceto do what I felt like I should
have done and from there I waslike OK, I started working more,
(15:55):
so in the health field, believeit or not.
In fact, my concentration Ihave an MBA, I have a master's
in business, but myconcentration is health
administration and I was doing alot of great things with the
managerial side of health care.
But then I realized OK, I onlychose that, though, because of
(16:15):
the money.
Speaker 3 (16:17):
And so really what I?
Speaker 1 (16:18):
wanted to do was what I'm doing now, and that was my
turning point.
Like, okay, I'm going to stepout, I'm going to step out.
Even with a nine to five I hadstepped out and to start a
company Loman Creative Servicesand the rest is history.
We could talk about that fromthere, but that was my turning
point.
That really was just anirritation, like there's more.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
I can't.
I just I didn't feel like itwas the place for me.
Um, did you, did you strugglewith realizing this is what?
This is what you wanted withyour past?
Was there things that creepedin that kind of like would get
in your own mind to try to holdyou back?
Speaker 1 (16:57):
no, unless I'm unaware, but that's awesome.
I love that, no, no, not at all.
In fact, um, most time I talkabout my past or opportunities
like this, or opportunities tominister to someone, um, usually
I'm just stepping forward,moving forward to, you know,
great things that God has for me, for the business in my life.
(17:19):
Um, so much ahead and um, yeah,that's pretty.
I don't even think too much ofthe past.
Only, you know, like, like Isaid, opportunities like this,
and then when I meet someone Ican tell God releases me to
express things that I've gonethrough for his glory, you know,
um, but yeah, yeah, it soundsto me like sounds to me like
(17:43):
somehow you've been able to takethose struggles from the past
and let them make you a strongerperson, a more resilient person
.
Yeah, I really think so I reallythink so, Because when I think
of when I, when I just look nowand how he's allowed me to
travel and speak and all thosegreat things, yeah, I really
(18:08):
feel like it's the strength.
Definitely it has some way ofconnecting from the past because
of what I've gone through and Iguess inside I'm like no, I'm
not going back to that.
God have your way.
I'm not going back to snakes,god you know.
(18:28):
You know, but yeah, I think youknow somehow, yeah, there's a,
there's some kind of connectionthere where there's a resilience
and there's a push to know that, yeah, God has something
greater.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Oh, I love it.
I love it.
Thank you, bernice, for sharingthat.
I love that.
I love Ms Kilbreed you pointedthat out because yeah, I mean, I
mean she knows like I'm anentrepreneur and there's things
that's in my past that hasactually passed, things that
have kind of held me back inways like I had to get past and
it was so hard, and sometimesthose things can creep in even
today.
So I love hearing this side ofit.
(19:04):
I see that we have text.
Paps has something that hewould like to share.
If you want to bring up the mic.
Speaker 3 (19:08):
I've often said that the same things that will crush
one person will cause the nextperson to succeed.
That being said and you kind ofalluded to it, but knowing that
the odds were stacked againstyou, knowing the struggles you
faced, what was it that made youfeel you'd succeed, or did it
even matter?
Speaker 1 (19:27):
I'm a risk taker yeah .
I think, with everything that Iand that goes back to Mrs Killer
Bee question I think because ofmy past it has made me a risk
taker.
I've noticed that with me I'm abig risk taker.
Yeah, like the one pastor toldme recently.
We talked about it before butone of the Kenya African pastors
(19:50):
.
He said when I went the veryfirst time I went by myself.
I had never met them likephysically.
I just knew that God hadconnected me to help them with.
It was a connection, and theysaid they look, when I finally
arrived they was like wow, shegot big faith.
She's a risk taker.
(20:11):
Cause I didn't have a team to gowith me at that time they just
started going with me.
But, yeah, I think, yeah, texas, I think, yeah, I look at it
now.
Yeah, I'm a risk, definitely arisk taker.
God leads me.
I ask him to lead me Like Icannot.
I'm like God.
I talk to him so real God, Ican't make this without you.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
You got to help me today.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
Like for real God.
You got to help me and that hastruly like God has truly helped
me.
That has truly helped me and Ido believe, of course, also just
knowing my past and what I'vegone through has allowed me to
be, you know, a risk taker.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
So yeah, and if he told you to do it, he's going to
see it through, right.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Yeah, I believe it.
Awesome, Awesome.
Thank you, absolutely.
Thank you, tex-fab.
(21:28):
Thank you.
I've had moments where I'veinterviewed entrepreneurs and I
would listen to a lot of theirstories and they would say, oh,
my father or my mother is abusiness owner and I've had
people that I've never had thatstory like literally, and I
would often think, like man,what would it be like?
Because, like I said, I'm aproduct of rape, like my dad.
My mom told me about him.
In fact, their family likedenied me for so long.
I'm going to tell you hismother told my mom do not tell
(21:49):
anybody what happened becausethey were afraid that he would
get locked up and it will be somuch like literally.
My mom went through momentswhere she didn't even tell many
people literally what happenedand so she went through that
moment.
I'm telling you when mygrandmother, my dad's mother
y'all hear this my dad's mother,my mom, said she took me as a
(22:14):
little baby, took me therebecause they still was saying my
mom was lying, that he didn'tdo it, and said they stripped
all my clothes off and says weneed to see if she has any
features like my, like us or myson till this day.
This is how I know about my oneof my toes looks just like my
(22:38):
dad.
They looked at my show and saidthat baby toe looks just like
Charles, which is my dad, andit's crazy.
But literally to this daythat's how I know some
resemblance of him.
And they said that I walk likehim because they took all my
clothes off, didn Didn't believemy mom.
And yeah, so little.
(23:01):
And I tell y'all, guys, I got astory.
I'm talking about my granddad.
When we went there one time mymom said he shot at us, he was
trying to kill us.
They didn't like us.
I'm y'all, I'm telling y'alllike this podcast would have to
be episode five.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Season eight.
Now everybody, you know what'sbeautiful Bernice.
It's like you know, I heareverything that you're saying
too, and it is like you knowdifferent entrepreneurs have
went through different you knowthey've had different lives.
You know you're saying like Idon't know, like what would it
be like if I had a father?
But I think the beautiful thingis that you actually did have a
father and you do.
(23:41):
You just didn't realize who thatwas until later, and I think
that's part of where well,you've made it clear, that's
where your faith is reallylining.
I mean, to be an entrepreneur,you have to be a risk taker, you
have to be right.
I mean Mrs Killer being aswe've taken a lot of risk and
she's actually been there tohelp, support me and has kind of
(24:02):
helped me at times and saidlet's look at, let's look at
what's the worst thing that canhappen.
If this doesn't, succeed and I'mlike, oh, ok, and it's great to
have support from a spouse or afriend or a loved one, somebody
that you can lean to, but youhave God that's doing that with
you too, and that's a beautifulthing, like you know, no matter
what God's with you, even ifthings you know.
(24:24):
We look at the story ofShadrach, meshach and Abednego.
You know, when it came to thefaith it was, you know, they
were being thrown into thefurnace, to the fire, but they
said, you know, they believedGod was going to deliver them.
But they said, even if hedoesn't, they had understanding.
No matter what way it went, godhad a purpose for it.
And those that don't know thestory he did take them through
(24:45):
the fire.
You know they didn't get even ascent or even didn't even smell
like smoke when he came out.
So but that's kind of likethat's the father that you have
as you're stepping out and doingmore and more as an
entrepreneur.
So it's beautiful.
It's beautiful to hear yourstory and I would.
So I want to ask you somethingbecause, as we're talking about
(25:05):
entrepreneurship, I know and youprobably have the same thing as
your social media feed I'mgoing to ask this as like a
personal question Is your socialmedia feed filled with
entrepreneur stuff?
Because mine is.
That's all I see.
Okay, that's all you see, right?
If you're all I see, okay,that's all you see, right.
If you're an entrepreneur,that's what all you see every
time you open up social media.
If you take care of plants,like mrs killer b, that's all
she sees is all plants.
(25:26):
Uh, I'm sure everybody herecould probably share what their
feed is.
Um, but what I want to ask youlet me tell you this, though
recently.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
So my mom loves animals, oh I mean all sorts of
animals.
So every time I see a reelabout animals, anything funny, I
try to lighten up her day so Iwould share it with her.
Well, I guess, because ofalgorithms, all I'm seeing a lot
of times is monkeys gorillas,oh my god it was just for my mom
(25:57):
oh my gosh you show interest inone thing and it is over, right
, like I'm constantly seeingLike, so every day I'm sharing
it to her.
Like okay, here's a video of acat and a gorilla.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
Yes, you know, we might have some people that's
listening to this podcast toothat are like, yeah, I want to
be an entrepreneur, just like Iwant to ask you this, because
entrepreneur life, especially onsocial media, can look very
glamorous, glamorous you know.
So I want to ask you this,because I know there's
challenges in that as well whathas been like, what's been a
(26:30):
challenge for you as anentrepreneur that you had to
move beyond?
Speaker 1 (26:34):
One of the challenge is I have a passion to help
ministries and I believe thatone of the challenges has been,
because I have a passion to helpministries, a lot of ministries
don't see the need fortechnology and it is like a hard
push.
(26:54):
And it is like a hard push so Iwent through so much of a
challenge of we have theservices but we also want to
serve and help ministries aswell.
So, like getting past that pushto also help those in the faith
community because our valuealso is faith and I mean I
(27:18):
boldly share.
We are Christian business ownerwith Christian business.
We have a Christian businessfellowship network.
So, yeah, that's been one ofthe challenges for me.
Like to get that balance.
Like I'm I'm I'm in ministry,right, I'm also ordained
minister, right, so I'm aminister, I love music ministry,
(27:39):
I love serving people andhelping people and I see the
need to help with ministries andI have the services.
But a lot of times theseministers and ministries don't
see the need for the service.
And so it's kind of like oh man,but I love to serve in this
area too.
So, yeah, that's been, that'sbeen one of the challenges.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Your heart is you want to help.
Your heart is to help.
We'll definitely be praying foryou about that too, Cause I
think that's it's definitely aheavy thing to carry.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
It is a challenge.
Especially, you know God hascalled you to help a certain
group too, especially you know,God has called you to help a
certain group too.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
I think that that's where it comes like with
ministry is is helping them seethat the value is the people.
It's not about, like thedifferent technologies, but it's
the people on the other side.
I think that, you know, we'vekind of went into this, this era
where even on social media,people are looked at as numbers,
like they want to see morenumbers, more views.
But it's not about the morenumbers.
These are real people on theother side of social media, on
(28:43):
the other side of these avatars.
These are all real people thatwe're connecting with, and less
is more.
We can go deeper.
Me and Mrs Killer Bee arereading a book right now, called
One at a Time, and it's abouthow Jesus zoomed in on.
He did a like a zoom lens.
Whenever anything was happeningaround crowds, he would zoom in
(29:03):
and be present with that oneperson.
Everything else became a blur.
It's hard to remember that andthink about that approach in
this kind of culture that we'rein, you know, but that's a great
thing, is like you'd love beingan entrepreneur, because
because of the freedom, probablyright.
You love being an entrepreneurbecause, because of the freedom?
Speaker 1 (29:21):
probably Right, yeah, I love the freedom.
You know when, even when I,even before that God had told me
that he wanted to use me morewith traveling and speaking and
helping leaders, whether theywere ministry and business, and
also with music ministry and sohe literally showed me and told
me, like literally what I'mdoing now.
God had already showed it to me, he prepared me for it.
(29:43):
So, yeah, it's the freedom.
Like I'm going to see my momnext week.
I blocked my schedule Like Ididn't have to ask nobody, Like
literally, you know.
I blocked my schedule so I cango see my mom.
You know just the freedom ofthat.
And if I get tired, like all myMondays are off, I take a rest
(30:06):
on Mondays.
You know, it's definitely.
Although it's a challenge, ithas its great benefits.
Like I travel across thecountry.
I travel across the country.
I could block, maneuver myschedule, connect with the team
and help them train them so Ican do what I do as well.
So it's I mean it's definitelygreat.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
That's amazing.
That's amazing.
Well, I'm going to ask you twoquestions before we wrap up.
Miss Kilbrey, did you haveanything?
Speaker 3 (30:33):
good.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Go right ahead.
So I'm going to ask you twoquestions.
The first one I'm going to askyou is what you know, what would
you tell your younger self ifyou had an opportunity, Like, if
there's something that you'velearned, if you could go back
and give yourself the youngerversion?
Of you some advice?
What would it be?
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Start a business early, oh yeah, much earlier
than I did.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
If there was one takeaway that you would hope
people would walk away withtoday, what would that be?
Speaker 1 (31:01):
In spite of your past , look to God, pray, have a
personal relationship with God.
You know, it wasn't until I hadthat personal encounter with
him that he was then real to me,in spite of what I went through
with church and everything.
It wasn't until then.
So, yes, get a personalencounter with God, holy Spirit,
(31:23):
and, in spite of your past,move forward.
You're resilient, just goforward.
Go for what you want to do,what God has called you to do.
You can do it.
Allow your gifts to make roomfor you.
If you enjoyed this episodedon't forget to follow this
podcast and leave us a review.
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