October 2, 2025 • 53 mins
This week’s New Yorker of the Week is Carl Radke! For the few who don’t know, Carl is a key cast member of Bravo’s Summer House, and these days he’s channeling his energy into Soft Bar, a non-alcoholic bar in Greenpoint that’s reimagining what nightlife can look like without the hangover.
Carl joins us to talk about the leap from Hamptons reality TV to founding his own bar, building community through sobriety, training for the New York City Marathon, writing a book, and so much more! This boy will not stop and we love it!
Spoiler alert: We went to Soft Bar, and it rules, so definitely go check it out ASAP!
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Hanna Gerlander: @hanna_gerlander
Nora Fried: @norafriedcomedy
Sean Curley - Production Manager and Video Editor: @therealseancurley
Special Guest: Carl Radke @carlradke
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:16):
Here we are, here we are. I just said while coming on that
I'm so ready to be a superstar. We are already superstars here
so. It's a state of mind.
You ready for it? The girl I babysit for him, she
only listens to Taylor Swift. And the other day I turned on.
(00:39):
I really wanted to listen to Haim, and we've just been
listening to a lot of Taylor Swift.
And I was just like, I really need a break and I really want
to listen to Haim. So I turned on Haim and I looked
at her and I said, she's like, what is this?
I was like, it's the new Taylor Swift album.
She was like, no, it's not. And I was like, yeah, it is.
Idiot you. Didn't like you, didn't see this
(01:01):
one drop. She's like, what is how old?
Is she, she's 6 and 96. You didn't, you didn't get the,
you didn't see that drop. She was like, I don't think this
is Taylor Swift. And I was like, yeah, it is.
And honestly, girl, this is the new album.
Yeah, with it. It was the new Hyme album which
is amazing. And that's good for her.
Yeah, she needs to listen to a little more.
(01:21):
She eventually was like, Nora, what's going on here?
And I was like. It's not Taylor Swift, but don't
you like it? It's look, they're friends, Heim
and Taylor Swift. It's all a bunch of ladies with
guitars. Come on, let's just.
Let's just let it expand ourselves a little bit.
Now let's take a second back though.
Let's take a step back. Stepping back.
(01:42):
Heim is superior to Taylor in somany different ways and I know a
lot of people are going to disagree with me, but like
Taylor's like the Walmart and Heim is like the cool Bushwick
Club. OK, I I would say more.
I know those things aren't really.
I would say maybe like Taylor islike Amazon.
(02:05):
No, I know you like saying that Taylor is like 40 is like Times
Square and like Heim is like thedive bar in Bushwick that like,
you know what I mean? Like.
The famous dive bar that just hold up in New York Times.
New York and go to Times Square,but then you get there and it's
kind of like the same and overwhelming.
(02:26):
Not maybe what you wanted, but then you go to this dive bar and
the drinks are cold and the people are hot and the music's
loud and you're like, now that'swhat I wanted.
That's what I wanted. Heinz there.
Walmart to Bushwick bar is harsh.
I my brother just made a group chat with me, my mom and his
wife. This is a.
(02:48):
New chat that has dropped. And it does it have a title.
It is a photo of my dead dad. Oh no.
OK so that's so assigned. Oh God no.
Why is he sending multiple pictures of my dad?
That's that's a tough one. Like give a.
Girl a heads up. I'm so sensitive today.
(03:10):
Oh, you know. Hey do you guys want to look at
old pictures of dad is a good question.
That's a good pic. I mean a good question.
Sorry, question. That's a good question.
Right. Like right?
Would you ever just start? People, people send me photos of
my dad, dad like just randomly and I'm like.
(03:31):
It's him at the hospital. Oh Jesus, it's sad that.
Is really sad. I love looking at pictures of
him healthy. Yeah, that's like, that's a
different category, right? I'm going to have to have a talk
with him and why? Why is Ally in it?
No offense, that's my brother's wife, but like.
She's not. She wasn't there for.
That and like right, it's like look at those four more
(03:51):
messages, OK, well, well that's now we're offline.
We are offline. Now it's Do not disturb.
It's. DND and they better not
override. That yeah, this is a literal
huge episode and my brother is for some reason bringing my dead
dad into. It sometimes the dead dad pops
up. I know.
But, and I guess this is literally moments ago in last
(04:14):
week's episode, what I was begging for, I was, I literally
was like, where is he? Where is he?
Yeah, he's right there. He's right.
There is today. Like an anniversary.
What is it? What day is it?
September 22nd. It's nothing.
It's not his birthday, nothing. It's not the day he died.
Nothing. It's it's nothing.
Just. September 22nd.
(04:35):
Ish ish. Well, sorry about that, Hannah.
It's OK, This is, you know what it this is, this is the classic
Randy and I have the same grief that we lost our dad, but we
deal with it in two different ways.
And this is to him some sort of comfort or coping.
And it is not even close to whatI want to do.
Randy, take the hen. Take the hen.
(04:59):
Your brother's name is Randy. Why it's just?
Such a like funny. It's my mom's maiden name,
Kimberly Randall. His name is Randall Randall
James. Her she had no middle name
Kimberly Randall. And now she has took my dad's
name So Kimberly Randall Jerlander.
Randy is Randall James Jerlander.
(05:20):
I just love it. I love the image of your mom
being like Randy. It's such a good, it's such a
good name to like. Yell at yeah.
It's like it made sense their name to like, be who he is.
You can't be. Like you have to yell at him.
You can't be like, you can't be like Brian.
He has to be like, you know, it has to be Paul or Paul.
(05:41):
No, that's not that doesn't work.
Randy, Randy. Randy.
So like he's pissing you off. Yeah, Randy.
Really, Randy? And that was, yeah, I got in
Randy like he was never up for school on time.
He never finished his homework. He Randy came home later than
it. Like it was like you had to yell
at him all the time. Yeah.
(06:02):
Looking at the cats. Today's a really big day.
It is. It is a big day.
We have an amazing guest on today.
I'm so excited and it it feels it's like a dream.
Yeah, it's kind of like, I don'tknow, I mean, do you believe?
Dreams can come true 'cause now I do.
I mean I I'm starting to believein manifesting after literally
(06:25):
30 minutes ago screaming about wanting a sign that my of my dad
and now without consent being sent like 7 bonus of him.
So I I also really believe in the power of you booking guests.
Like it's like Nora can make thedreams of the dreams come true.
I'm trying, but it's a collab effort without your beautiful
(06:49):
digital creations. That's so nice.
But like booking wise, like I can't imagine, like when
somebody follows up with me, I'mlike, I'm gonna kill myself.
It's a lot of back and forth, but this person was actually
very kind and like has a really large following, has a status,
is a person who people, they area person.
(07:13):
And he was just very chill down to earth and came on the pod and
was like, hey girls. And you guys will hear part of
it, but like he's he really likewanted to connect.
Yeah, he was really into connecting and and we love him.
Yeah, it was really great. And I mean, we thanks to like
(07:35):
Nora's booking, we get to interview a lot of cool people,
but we don't also get an extension to like be part of
what they're up to. Yeah.
So should we just release the the big surprise of who it is?
Because you guys probably know from the episode title. 123 Carl
Radke is the guest. Carl Radke listening.
(07:55):
Listening. Listening like what the?
And be like, well, what an announcement.
What an announcement. No Carl is he is a Bravo
Liberty. He was on summer House.
He he's now starting his own thing where he basically has
(08:16):
become like the sober and sober curious icon.
And I didn't really know about him until before and during the
interview. And like, he's really changed
his whole life. He's completely inspiring.
It's amazing. And he was like a star of the
show, and he's still the star ofthe show even as a sober person.
And he's created a beautiful barin Greenpoint.
(08:38):
Like it's like stunning. It's really beautiful.
And it's called Soft Bar and everyone should go to it.
And we talk a lot about it in this episode.
And we got to go to like one of the openings.
And we got, yeah, we got a private.
And that was really exciting. We got to hear him speak and we
got to meet other other influencers like us.
They seemed a little different than us.
(08:59):
They had like their ring lights and their.
Tripods. But yeah, there was one girl who
would not quit. She was on her game.
It's like equal parts like cringe and impressive.
It's amazing. I'm like, how do you do?
That and it's like, I know I need you to do that 'cause I go
home and I watch the videos thatpeople like her post, you know,
like I watch Influencer's Day inmy life.
(09:21):
But when you're watching them doit, it's like it's another
level. It's level.
I'm sorry, that's my next. My next step in booking is being
more active in person in a photosituation.
I'm not like, hey, can we get a photo?
I'm always just like we kind of to connect and talk to people on
(09:42):
that it. Feels undocumented.
I just don't. Like documenting it, it feels it
feels inauthentic. I know, but.
It's like like we should have, we did try to take pictures.
So the drinks at soft bar are, are incredible.
They are all non alcoholic, which I love 'cause you know, so
we're queen over here and I, we were trying to take photo like a
static photos and we kept posingwith little things and it really
(10:07):
wasn't working out. But then I like thought I got
the shot. We were like, I got it, I got
it. And then they looked and we were
like, they like we're sharing people's tagging them like in
their Instagram story. And it I got to see like what
everyone else's shot looked likenext to mine.
And I was like, I didn't even, It's like how, how do people
know how to take a picture of like 2 drinks and like their
(10:31):
purse? And it looks like the chicest
thing. It's really.
Cool. I'm like, I don't know, if
someone could just tell me that,that would be amazing.
Give her a sign. Cuz like clear here we go give.
Me a sign. Someone just tell me how to do
that. Send me 7 photos in a tutorial.
With Alkins, it is really crazy,but we.
(10:53):
Yeah. So we had a really wonderful
time at the private opening. You were invited?
Only we were. And no, I'm just kidding.
There probably were some people invited that were listening to
this. Maybe.
Maybe. Not no way.
No way. It was super exclusive.
No way. So.
You had to be on the list. And if you did, keep that to
yourself. Yeah, we don't want to hear
about it. Because as you can see, we're
kind of on one about being invited.
(11:14):
So please keep it to yourself. If you're very excited.
But yeah. And then Carl was just such a
joy to interview. And now I'm like, where do we go
next? Like, I don't even know who to
interview next. I'm like we I reached out to the
pet psychic. But like, I don't know.
We're gonna oh, I actually was thinking something.
OK, so just timing wise, the next episode we need a guest on
(11:37):
is the 30th of October, which isthe day before Halloween.
So maybe we should find a psychic or something like
Spooky. Yeah, the pet psychic.
The pet psychic, But she's kind of like more entertainment.
We need someone who's going to like, give us, give us like a
spooky tale. OK, OK, let.
Me, we could even go to 1. Maybe a magician?
(12:00):
Definitely a magician. Oh my God, that's amazing.
A New York. Magician and we will ask
Dorinda. We're going to chat with her on
Wednesday. You.
Know I really hope I can get outof this interview on Wednesday.
You're gonna manifest it. Just yell it.
It's weaponing, yelling the way I was.
(12:21):
Well, I hope everyone enjoys this.
We're not gonna do a super long intro because the this interview
was so wonderful and we ended upinterviewing him for a little
bit longer than we anticipated in a great way because we had a
lot to talk. About we had the our zoom stop
and then we were like silently typing, typing, typing,
(12:41):
Googling, Googling, Googling to get back into that call.
We if there's any two people that can troubleshoot.
It's us. You should have seen it here.
Tech wise, they're sitting righthere.
Right here, Nora and Hannah. We're if there's if there's a
problem, I'm not gonna give up. It's not gonna maybe be the
fastest way or the right way, but it's gonna, it's gonna solve
the problem. It's gonna get you there.
(13:02):
And I hate when people are like,don't do it quick, do it the
right way. No, no, I'm doing it quick.
And we're doing it the right. Way Yeah, we happen to do both
we happen to do both Wow. Nothing my.
Pace just got really itchy for some reason.
Really. Yeah, it's pretty late.
It's 9. It's a late.
(13:22):
So there's if there's a time when the faces get itchy.
It's a late, It's a late night, it's late.
For us to record at this hour, this is crazy.
For this is like what podcastersall over the world do, though.
They're like, yeah, I wanna comeby the studio at 10:00 PM and
I'm like, what's going on in your cheek?
I'm looking in the side of my life, but I think I have some of
(13:42):
the candy. We had some candy from last
episode. Yeah, you guys might remember
from last episode. The candy.
The candy. Well, it's here this week as
well. It's.
Back All right, everyone enjoy this incredible interview and
yeah, we'll we might never have a guess this big again so we
(14:03):
will we will just kidding. The Sky's the limit, and even
that is. We've had a lot of Bravo
liberties on, yeah, we're reallyracking up.
A we're heading into and they'restill all New York.
Jason Yep. And connected.
So that's. Very important to us.
And that is huge for. Us and Carl, will he have ran
the marathon yet or no? No, it's like a really far it's
(14:24):
long way. OK.
No, it's, it's in November. OK.
And this comes out in October? OK, so we can't say.
And then he won the marathon. If he wins the marathon, that
would be, I would say that he would, Oh my God, two year.
It's coming through the headphone.
I know it's really great to see my cat.
(14:45):
She wants she wants this wrappedup and she wants me out of here
so you guys can play in peace. Play in peace, all right?
Yeah. He hasn't won the marathon yet.
Love you too. Bye bye.
All right, awesome. Guest is here.
Guest is here. Today we have a really fun
guest. I'm really excited about this.
(15:05):
Today's New Yorker of the Week is Carl Radke.
You may know him from Summer House, but these days he's
making waves as the founder of Soft Bar in New York, which is a
new non alcoholic bar that we. Both go to the open.
We did get to. Very exciting.
Carl has become a voice in the sober and sober curious
(15:25):
community. He's training for the New York
City Marathon and he has a book coming out later this year.
I believe it's called Cake Eater, but yeah, welcome, Carl.
Thanks for joining us. Welcome.
To the podcast. Thank you for having me.
I'm honored to be introduced as such.
That was a really good introduction.
Thank you. Awesome.
Cool. Well, thanks for coming on.
(15:48):
We're really happy to have. You having us at the opening of
Softbar, that was, yeah, We wereso excited to be there.
That was. Really fun that was.
Glad you guys, glad you had a good time.
I'm glad you got to see it. You know, I think it's been a,
it's been a process getting to that point.
But yeah, it was cool to kind ofpull back the curtain and show,
you know, kind of our close friends and family and local
(16:09):
friends, you know, what's going on.
But you know, this week we are officially open to the public.
So. Excited for that, you know,
doing the soft openings has beengreat, but you know, we wanted I
wanted to be open sooner to be completely honest, but things
take you know, some time and just the way the world works so.
Yeah. And so for people who don't
(16:30):
know, can you say tell us how like Soft Bar came to be?
Yeah, so I I've been in the alcohol industry since 2018.
Loverboy, the neon sign behind my shoulder.
I was a founding member of an alcohol company with two of my
best friends, Kyle Cook and Amanda Botula, and started
(16:51):
there, you know, helping with them building the brand.
I was the VP of sales, but then I got sober in January of 2021
and working in the alcohol industry, not drinking is a very
eye opening experience. I saw a lot of things as a
consumer, you know, there was lack of options, there was a
lack of places to go consume nonout drinks.
(17:15):
And I just have been kind of seeing things that I wanted
differently. You know, I wanted if I'm
drinking a non alcohol, I drink,I want something that's low
sugar and low calorie. I don't want more sugar and more
carbs. I wanted a cool place to hang
out, something that I could bring friends and people that
still drink, but would go there for a little bit and just take a
break or have fun. So I really set out of the last
(17:39):
almost three years been kind of thinking about this concept of
creating, you know, a third space, a place where you can go
any time of day and have a really great non alcoholic
beverage, but also sit down, connect with a friend, be on
your computer by yourself. And one way I wanted to do that
was take the coffee culture and non out culture and combine
(18:00):
them. So what I created is Soft Bar,
which is a bar and Cafe where not only coffee, but also
alternative coffee and functional drinks and soft
cocktails, which is what most people would think of as a
mocktail. However, we don't serve
mocktails at Soft Bar. We're not making fun of
anything. It's all very intentional.
Oh, I like that, yeah. So yeah, it's soft bar was, you
(18:24):
know, born officially last year,August 1st, 2024.
We started as a mobile pop up. I have a really cool sprinter
van that's been, you know, kind of customized with taps and
refrigeration. So we were doing brand events
and activations from the Hamptons to the to New York City
last year. We did some stuff for dry
January and then, you know, we got the space in Brooklyn.
(18:47):
We got our lease signed in January, started building in
March and doors open middle of September.
So really proud of it. But I think, you know, there's
been a lot of excitement for it and it's been amazing and so
cool to see people connect with this concept and if anything are
just like harassing me when it'sgoing to be open because they're
so excited to come. But I don't think people realize
(19:10):
how not only much attention to detail we put into this, we
really didn't just I didn't justrent an old bar and put paint on
it and say this is soft bar. I started from scratch with a
industrial space in Greenpoint, Brooklyn that is in a really
cool neighborhood with a lot of Wellness, great restaurants,
great coffee shops. But what I wanted was something
(19:32):
that still had like a feeling and a vibe.
And so we kind of created a really high design coffee and
bar inside of a cool industrial space.
The space is beautiful, by the way.
When we were there like that waslike everyone was talking about.
They were obviously talking about like you and the drinks of
course, but also like this. No, I want them to talk about
(19:52):
they want them to talk about thespace.
I mean, my, my hope from the beginning is, and I do.
I've done this personally. Like I've gone, I live in Green
Point, I go to Devocion, I've gone to sweet Leaf, I go to
partners, I go to all these places.
I go to Devocion. And when I said to myself the
first time I walked in there, I'm like.
This is fucking cool. Like I would I would hang out
(20:13):
here even if they don't serve anything I want to drink.
And guess what? Devocion doesn't really serve
anything I drink because I don'tdrink coffee.
So it's funny because I think I think people hopefully will get
the feeling when they come to software, they're going to go,
oh, this is cool. I'd still hang out here even
though they don't have maybe alcohol or what I'm hoping for.
So I think we've hopefully done that.
(20:35):
But the drinks, the food, you know, the programming, the
music, my staff, our team, it all has to come together too,
outside of those things as well.But the feeling you get, I hope.
I'm glad to hear you had a good feeling when you were there so.
Yeah, we even got the bathroom. One little check on the box.
Yeah, even the bathroom, we werelike, I was like, you got to get
(20:56):
in there. I was like, I'm trying, I'm
trying. You don't drink coffee.
What's up with the coffee? More anxious.
So how do? How are you here right now?
What's going? On how are you opening a bar
without like opening a sophomore?
I don't. Want to?
I don't want to get it twisted. I still drink caffeine but from
other sources like green tea, matcha, it's a lower intensity.
(21:19):
Yeah. But there's a lot of science out
there about coffee, and if you drink coffee like the first
thing you wake. Up.
It actually. Increases it right As you said
it it it's. Like it increases your, your
cortisol levels, which is the producer of stress and anxiety
in your body. It just naturally does that.
Like just drinking more coffee makes you, it elevates that
(21:40):
level of, and I, for me, I'm, I have anxiety and depression.
You know, my mental health is very important to me.
And coffee wasn't necessarily supporting me in the way that it
might support others. But I thought coffee, the coffee
culture and the the community ofa coffee shop is something that
gets lost in non alk. It's like, oh, you're doing non
(22:02):
alk, It's just non alk. It's like, no, like people still
want these other alternatives and or also a great coffee.
So we have the best coffee you can find and also alternative
coffee that you can't find either.
That cherry drink with the coffee in it was delicious.
I don't know if you had. There's a blue one that's called
(22:23):
like the Blizzard Bliss. That's a tea.
I think that's. What you had right, you had.
The the tea has a chemical reaction to the coconut and the
citrus in the liquid and it turns blue, which is why that is
blue. So we're doing a lot of like
more advanced elevated like specialty coffee beverages and
also specialty non out beverages.
(22:44):
Wow, yeah, I think I need to quit coffee then, because
everything that he was describing.
No, I mean coffee. I don't, We don't want to sit
here and say coffee's bad. I think a lot of people love
it's great. But I I have a personal theory
deep down in my body. I think a lot of our population
is over caffeinated, which is why we're so anxious.
Because we like. Our phones and our tech, it's
(23:05):
all like in our faces and then you're drinking a substance that
makes you more anxious, so. Yeah.
And I would say that most peoplehave like a coffee or two a day,
but then also have things that maybe they're not like clocking
has caffeine and like I have like a Diet Coke like every
night at 8:00 PM like that's. That's probably.
Not ideal. You know what they call diet
(23:26):
Cokes in like a a It's a fridge cigarette.
Wow my mom had like 4 a day. I'm smoking.
Diet Cokes have in their place. Diet Cokes have their place for
sure. I mean, you know, when I stopped
drinking almost five years ago, you know, you find things that
work for you. You know, some people smoke or
drink coffee or whatever it might be, but that's a much
(23:49):
better alternative for for thosethan alcohol or hard drugs.
So for me, I've but a soda waterguy, loverboy.
We have a non alcoholic sparkling tea, but it's only 10
calories and 0 sugar. So I'm very particular about my
non alk because I'm just becauseI'm not drinking, I don't want
like another sugary thing. So that's also the white space
(24:11):
and what I've seen as a consumer, but also working in
the alcohol industry, a lot of things are still very unhealthy,
but presenting themselves as a non alcohol great.
It's not out, but what's in it? Yeah, I feel like we I get a lot
of ads for like because I'm sober myself and I I get a lot
of ads of like you should try this drink.
(24:32):
It has tons of like different mushrooms in it and weed.
One was breeze. It was mushrooms and weed.
I drank one of them and I completely lost my mind.
I was like, this is worse than like any blackout I've ever like
this will not ever have. But like, you know, it was
pretty bad. Feel like you're casual?
Some of those canned beverages that have CBDTHC, other
(24:56):
functional ingredients, the doses are pretty high so I don't
consume those drinks either. I've tried a few over the last
few years but like you're saying, I don't love the feeling
I get. We are exploring at soft bar low
low, very small dose CBD functional options.
(25:18):
That would be 1 milligram or less, which won't give you that
feeling that you were getting from like a 5 milligram or 10.
But yeah, I'm with you on some of the those functional THC and
stuff because it's, it's too high in my opinion.
And you get like mind altered and we're not doing anything
mind altering at soft bar. Yeah, I definitely, it was not
(25:41):
functional. I didn't feel functional.
I had to go home. Yeah, I was like, I gotta go.
This is not this is not a brass,I feel.
That's not what you want in the social setting either.
Like at a social event, you wantto like talk to people and feel
good and you're gonna be like inthe corner like, Oh my God,
you're. Mine.
Yeah. I was like, I need to go home
and like listen to Elsie. And Nora's like life of the
party, Like we can't have her drinking stuff that's gonna have
(26:03):
her going home early. OK, Speaking of partying, this
is our one Summer House question'cause we do need to bring it
up. When you first signed on to
Summer House, what were your expectations like?
Did you ever imagine becoming such a strong role model for the
sober and sober curious community?
Like, was that ever on your mind?
No, OK, no. I mean, that's what I think the
(26:25):
beauty of kind of how my life has kind of gotten to this
point. You know, growing up in my
family, alcohol was a big part of our family.
You know, I had some family members that looking back now,
yeah, I mean, they struggled. I mean, there was a lot of that.
So I was always surrounded by itgrowing up.
But to think that when I joined,being on TV or signed up for it,
(26:50):
you know, I partied hard back then and I thought I'd be like
the likeable party boy. But the result was the opposite
of that. I, you know, it was a very
sobering, dare I say that word, watching myself back under the
influence. And, you know, I didn't, I was
drinking a lot. I took Adderall, I would do
(27:11):
cocaine off camera and after hours, but also just very
unstable all around. So but it's been a beautiful
journey of being a part of the show and being able to like
really open up. And I'd say in the last five
years of doing it, it's been really powerful, just being
really honest. And like, it took me some time
(27:32):
to realize that I was, you know,an alcoholic and a drug addict.
Once I made that commitment and raised my hand and got the help
I needed, it's been amazing to still be a part of this.
And they give me the opportunityto to do it.
So yeah, I, I never, if you would have held a gun in my head
10 years ago and said you're going to be doing all this
(27:53):
stuff, I would have literally said I'm going to take the gun
from you and shoot you now because you're insane.
Interesting. Yeah.
But I used to also when people would tell me way back when, 10
years ago that they were not drinking or sober, I would make
fun of it. And I think a lot of that was
also my insecurity inside and what they say.
And at least my experiences in going to a A and my sponsor, if
(28:15):
you spot it, you got it. And a lot of people typically
are uncomfortable with your drinking or not are also deep
down inside. That's where that behavior comes
from is their own discomfort with their relationship with
alcohol. OK, I snapped because dating is
a nightmare for me personally sometimes because some guys are
(28:37):
like, are you serious? You're not going to drink?
And it's like, why are you pushing me to drink?
This is like getting. Right, this is a date we're
trying to get to know each other.
Like if me not drinking is goingto ruin the date then like I
don't know what. It's so crazy and people get
really like, they keep asking you questions, why didn't you
drink? It's like I stopped drinking
because life was so great that Iwanted to stop drinking.
Like, what do? What do you want the answer to
be right? Well, you know.
(28:58):
What I get really honest I if people press or don't.
Yeah. You know, I'd say I, I, I'm an
alcoholic, I couldn't control mydrinking and it became
unmanageable. And this is just the best way
for me to operate. And I'm sorry if it makes you a
little uncomfortable, but this is what is best for me, you
know? Wow, I need to write that down.
(29:19):
Yeah, we'll. Get write that down.
I get it a lot, but there are people that will walk up to me
and not be familiar with the show or whatever and see me
drinking something different. And they I've had a lot of that,
but I actually enjoy just kind of being like, no, I'm an
alcoholic. They're like, OK, they like
(29:40):
slowly fade away. Yeah, they like.
Expect I just, I wear like I'm proud.
Like I think the more you can beproud of being honest about your
flaws or the things that you struggle with.
I don't know. It's been really for me, it's
like, OK, if you don't like me because I'm being real or
honest, like that's fine. I'd rather be dated for what I
am than like for what I'm not. Whoa, OK, these are really,
(30:04):
there's some kind of like reallygood quotable moment.
Yeah, these are quotable moments.
Speaking of. Dating though in New York what
like what is your obviously going to soft bar is like the
perfect date but like what is your idea of like the perfect
sober date. I would say, I mean, honestly,
you got to have some food and and a date.
I mean, I like to snack and eat.So definitely either pick like a
(30:27):
cool spot that has good appetizers or things that you
can talk while eating. I have gone on 1st dates where
you get a big burger and you're like wiping your face after
every bite trying to have a conversation and it's not great,
but you know, food for sure. But after you get a little bite
to eat and maybe a non alcoholicbeverage or a coffee, go for a
walk, you know, get your legs moving, do some little walking
(30:50):
and then always got to finish with either like an ice cream or
some sort of sweet and then takethe ice cream.
It's. Like a long day.
This is like. More this is when you got like
the person when. Do you put in OK you.
Don't like them? If you don't like them, then
you're not getting ice cream. Go get just an appetizer if you
don't like them, OK? But OK, I would say is meet up
at either a cool coffee shop, have a beverage and then go for
(31:13):
a walk. If it's going well, maybe go and
get some ice cream, but I like doing a little bit of food and
beverage and then going for a walk.
For a walk could be through Mccarran Park.
I live closer to the water in Green Point, so I like to walk
along the water. The pier sunset, that is
(31:33):
typically like a cool first. I'd also say workout classes or
yoga could be a fun kind of if you know that person is into
that stuff. Like a workout thing and then
after the workout grab a juice or smoothie or something.
That's nice. Are you dating right now?
I'm single, but yeah, I've been dating for the last few months
(31:57):
trying to, I haven't, I haven't met that person, but I've
definitely been putting myself out there.
And you know, I'm, I've been really focused on my business as
well. To be honest, it's been
challenging to find. Having a kid.
Exactly. It is like opening a new
business. It's like being a parent.
It's like non-stop attention. It is, and I you know, I'm I was
(32:20):
filming all summer, so you know,I've I've gone on some dates,
but the date I was actually describing was a date I went on
like the the ice cream and then the wok, which was nice, which
was a really nice. We watched the sunset.
It was really nice, but it. Was really nice.
That's romantic. What do you have any?
Do you have any, like, advice for fellow New Yorkers that are
(32:42):
like dreaming of opening up a shop in New York or like any
sort of storefront or anything like that?
Yeah, I'd say first do mobile. OK.
Pop up first, try it out not only for yourself, but see if it
works. You're going to get feedback.
You're going to learn a lot in those kind of early things.
(33:06):
I wouldn't recommend like signing a lease first.
Work out the kinks of what you're doing in a smaller way.
Get your local friends and or get your friends, your family
and the people closest to you tocome and support that little and
see what they think. And you use that information and
expand. I think a lot of people just
(33:27):
immediately just put something in your face and they want to go
big right away. I'm a believer in kind of
building one step at a time. So yeah, my advice would be, you
know, don't sign a lease out of the gate.
Give yourself a little time to like really figure out what this
business model is, what you're serving, how it all works.
I mean, our first pop up we did over a year ago, just like
(33:51):
putting it together. We, we had 15 drinks on the
menu, which was insane. Like it was a lot for us
logistically and from a like a workflow.
So we actually the next pop up we're like, we're not doing 15
drinks again because we can't like, so you learn a lot in
those early kind of pop ups and kind of small activation.
So I, that's what I would recommend before you ever sign
(34:14):
your lease, do a due diligence test.
And what I mean by that, it's kind of like getting a home
inspection before you like send your mortgage payments in.
There's not termites or mold or asbestos.
What I mean by that is like do the research on the
neighborhood, the building, the adjacent businesses and
(34:35):
companies, the foot traffic fromsubway to subway, bus station to
bus station, ferry connections, all of that.
Like do your due diligence on a location before you sign a
lease. And that's probably the two
things I would say out of the gates.
But I, I don't, I don't have it all figured out.
These are some things I've learned from other entrepreneurs
(34:57):
that you know I look up to and have given me some guidance.
Did you ever receive any feedback from friends?
And you were like, I'm not goingto listen to you?
That doesn't sound right. All the time.
I mean my favorite, which, whichis this is I've done, we've got
a lot of, I'm very, very passionate about this and I've
(35:19):
spent a lot of time networking and meeting different people,
financial entrepreneurs, venturecapital, private equity.
So you get a lot of feedback andafter, you know, like a very,
very successful businessman do the pitch.
(35:40):
I think I'm, you know, I'm, I just talk like I I live and
breathe this. He he's like, so there's no
alcohol. I'm like, I just go back.
I'm like, yeah, that. This might.
Not be a good fit. Like that, that's he's like, you
sure you're not going to do justone alcoholic beverage?
(36:00):
I'm like, no, this is that. This is why we're doing.
What? I said like no.
So honestly, it was good, it wasgood feedback because it's stuff
we've had to actually like be able to answer properly.
The question is, will you have agroup of five women, three of
them drink, the other two don't.What are they going to do if
(36:21):
they want to go to, if the threewant to go drink, they're not
going to go to soft bar is what people say.
So like, how do you answer that?And I answer, well, actually the
two friends that aren't drinkingaren't going to go to the bar.
And that's the rest of the threeactually might just not go now
because of the group isn't going.
So there's ways to like work with the feedback you're getting
(36:43):
to help you refine your approachand your strategy and just what
you're all about. So I appreciate feedback.
I've been told no on this business a lot.
A lot people can't wrap their head around not having alcohol
in your business model because in New York, majority of the
(37:05):
margin that businesses are making their money off of is not
necessarily from food. Food costs are very high, labor
costs are high. You're basically breaking even
there. Where you're making your money
is on You buy a bottle of Tito'sfor $30.
You sell 40 drinks out of it for$13 each.
You make $300 on each bottle of Tito's that you sell.
(37:27):
The margin on alcohol is significant in a bar setting,
which now the shift of alcohol sales is eating up that pie.
But what they're not looking at is this other elements of what I
believe creates some business success, which is coffee day
parts. You have other options in your
day. Most bars only have one day part
(37:47):
from 4:00 to midnight on 7:00 AMto 12:12 to 5:00 five to close.
So there's something in there for everyone.
But you know, we're hopeful withour business model since it's
not selling alcohol, but it picks up in other ways that so
some people haven't been able towrap their head around that a
little bit, which I understand we're doing something new.
(38:11):
But I really believe the team I put together and not only the
just kind of the business operation, we've secured low
rent. I've got a lean operation.
We have baristas and bartenders that can do both, also
generating revenue from other ways, partnerships and brands,
private events, public events, social media, merch and also
(38:34):
direct to consumer products. So it's more than just a bar,
but it's also, I feel like when all comes to life is in the like
where it all comes to life is atthe four walls, but we're
extending the brand outside of the four walls in different
ways. We're also licensing our menu.
So if you're a, for example, if you're like a fitness concept
(38:56):
and you're serving maybe Celsiusand a cool soda water, they're
now looking for maybe another functional option or a cool
hydration option. We are going to be curating our
menu and some of those fitness concepts, you know, brought to
you by Soft Bar and it would be some of our curated options for
you. So there's other ways we're kind
of extending the brand outside of the four walls.
(39:17):
Sorry to cut you off. No, no, it's OK.
I cut you off too. I was just saying, I also feel
like they're not thinking about and we see this a lot in comedy.
There's just more, and I don't wanna call it a trend, but
there's more people sober now. I feel like there's more people
who they don't want to be out late, they don't want to get
drunk, they don't want to be hungover.
Like I just feel like they're not thinking about like, yeah,
of course there was a time in New York where, like serving
(39:39):
drinks made you a ton of money. But like, I don't really feel
like that's as much as the what's going on right now.
I see a lot more people very into fitness, very into movement
and very into like alternatives or just like not drinking at
all. And that's why like we see a lot
of people like spending their time.
So I feel like they don't think about how the like alcohol
(40:00):
business and has like shifted genuinely and especially in New
York. Yeah.
Well, I mean, it's definitely, yeah, there's, there's a huge,
I, I see it a little bit in some, I mean, a lot of places we
love and frequent over the yearsin New York, you know, place
close, it places close, but a lot of it is rent and operation
in New York is obviously expensive, but a lot of places
(40:23):
that typically we're making moremoney from alcohol that aren't,
but you still have a $30,000 a month lease.
It's getting a little tricky. And I, I sympathize and
empathize with a lot of the bar owners and restaurant owners
because it's an industry. Like there's a lot at stake here
with people with lives and families and children and
they've made money working in the alcohol industry.
(40:45):
But there's not only been a hugecultural shift in folks like our
age in their, you know, late 20s, thirties, 40s, but you have
also the the Gen. Z generation who is not drinking
really at all. Yes, they're vaping and doing
edibles, but there's just been amassive shift.
And I think we're in a really good position to kind of capture
(41:05):
that. But you know, it'll be
interesting to see how other bars and restaurants adapt to
this. I go to bars all the time.
I was at one yesterday for four hours.
I didn't spend $1.00 because they don't have anything I would
actually buy. I just wanted to hang out with
my friends. I drank water, didn't spend a
dollar. I always say that when I go on a
date I'm like I'm a cheap date. Although one time I did have 4
(41:28):
Shirley Temples on a date and that was really weird and he was
like this is kind of crazy and I'm like well you just had 4
beers so we're like on the same page now.
What's wrong with? 4 Shirley Temples that's.
And when I asked the bartender for it, I was like Shirley
Temple. Like for a child, not a dirty
Shirley. Like, don't act like that.
You would give a child. That's what I want.
(41:48):
Like when a kid is having like aspecial night at.
A special night. 2 special night.
My 10th birthday. It's my 10th birthday.
OK, We're almost out of time. Quickly, though, we really
wanted to cover your book. Like what?
So you're opening a bar, you're filming, and you're writing a
book, and you're training for the marathon.
(42:08):
This is nuts. Carl, I already wrote the book.
Yeah, I know. But it's coming out from the
plate, so that's off. So it's coming out this
December, right? Is that correct?
December 30th I, you know, in inhardcover with Simon and
Schuster. Really excited about that.
And then I also did my audio book.
I narrated my own book with Audible.
(42:32):
So Audible will also have that experience, which is really
exciting because there's two consumers these days which I
didn't fully process. It makes a lot of sense.
And you have people that love just audio.
You have people that just love print.
Some people, some people do both, but they're almost 2
separate audiences. And I'm excited because my story
being so personal, me reading myown words and story, I think
(42:56):
will carry another level of of kind of reader experience that I
think will be really cool and unique.
So I spent a couple days by a couple days, about 6 days at
Audibles Studios reading and doing all of it, which is really
honestly emotional. I was challenging just because
it's like I really open up and I'm as raw and vulnerable as
(43:17):
I've ever been. Yeah.
Talking about my life leading upto what a lot of people have
seen on TV, but there's a lot ofthings that have really shaped
my drug addiction, my alcoholism, things I've been
through, my childhood, family, stuff that's going on and I
think hopefully will help other people.
And the reason I wanted to do this was I wanted to tell my
(43:39):
authentic story and hopefully one person reads it and gets
help or feels more confident to share that they struggle.
I felt it was important to use my platform to help inspire
others. Now, yes, like it's cool to have
your name on a, on a book and doall that.
But I had a publisher that really believed in my story.
(44:00):
And she said, you know, Carl, regardless of the bravo side of
things, I really think you have an important story to be told.
And she's a publisher out of Canada.
She's an amazing woman and really believed in what I was
talking about. So I, it's almost been over 2
1/2, three years in the making the book stuff and I came up
with the title all of my own. I had all of these notes and
(44:23):
chapters and things, but she really helped me dig deeper in a
lot of my youth and stories frommy past to, you know, put it all
together so. Wow, Everyone on Summer House
has to step up. You're like the hero of Summer
House. The standard.
Yeah, it's like everything. You're so earnest.
You you're doing so, so many good things for people.
(44:43):
Everyone I told, like when we were like telling people about
like interviewing you was like, it's such nice things to say.
Like you, you're the hero. Do look up to you I think.
You're the hero of Summer House,just as.
I I appreciate that, Nora. And I must say, I, I think I get
more credit than I deserve. Probably.
(45:04):
I also, you know, I'm, I'm flawed.
I'm still just cuz I got sober doesn't mean I'm not an asshole
or can be a Dick or have my moments of reactivity.
But I'm, you know, I'm proud of what I've been able to
accomplish. And honestly, you said I'm doing
a lot of things and that's how Istay sober is like having these
goals and having these like passions of mine, but getting
(45:27):
clear headed and getting some ofthat stuff out of the way.
And I'm just laser focused on these things where before
drinking or cocaine use or hungover or all of that was my
excuse around a time or on this or on that.
But I this is like what I'm supposed to do and what I want
to do. So now I have the energy to go
(45:48):
for it. But it's been stuff that's been
the kind of like brewing for thelast almost 2 1/2 three years.
But I kind of listed out like this is all very connected.
Everything I'm doing, like soft bar is part of the lifestyle
that I I live and embody. I wanted to share my story of
that lifestyle that I live and embody.
I want to talk about these stories and conversations with
other folks that have gone through similar things, the
(46:11):
podcast, my mental health and just staying mentally sound
running and also running for an organization that helps
addiction and sobriety relief recovery.
So I'm raising money for the NewYork City Marathon on their
behalf and the dollars and fundsthat I raised will actually help
sponsor someone who's strugglingwith rehab services, counseling,
(46:37):
halfway home or a place to live sober support and for me to run
for. I wanted to run personally, but
if running to help, also give someone money so they can afford
help is like amazing. So just all the kind of the
stuff that like is all connected.
They all like cohesive, which isreally exciting.
(46:57):
So it doesn't even feel like I'mthat I'm busy.
Abby, my assistant is on the call would be like rolling her
eyes right now, but it all like it's all amazing stuff.
And I, I feel very lucky and grateful that I'm in this
position. And you know, a lot of people
believed in me and supported me and I, I haven't done this
alone. Like it's been truly my friends
(47:18):
and Abby on this call. I've had a lot of, I've been
very lucky too, very privileged like I've been, I have certain
resources and tools that are afforded me because of reality
TV that others don't have. So it's not lost on me that it
can be really hard for others out there that aren't in some of
the positions I'm in. So I try to stay humble and stay
(47:39):
grounded and just, you know, it's one day at a time.
Wow, Carl, you really are New Yorker of the Week.
Thank you. You're.
Coming up and telling us more about everything.
Where can everyone find you on social?
You can find me well, I was going to say you can find me a
200 Banker St. Soft bar's location.
(47:59):
I won't be there all I mean I saw someone I was I stopped by a
bar to watch football yesterday after a workout class and
someone was like, are you going to be at soft bar like every
day? And I'm like I maybe.
You're like, I hope not every time I.
Don't want to be like the like the big boy mascot outside of
the diner. Like I don't know if that's a
(48:20):
reference. You guys get it?
All but no I understand. I will be there for the most
part but upstairs in our officesbut if you can't find me at soft
bar. Go upstairs.
Yeah, upstairs, backstairs. Knock on the office store and
Carl will be there as a mines. Yeah, when you start off.
At soft bar or downstairs, but also on on social media.
(48:41):
You can find me on Instagram or Tiktok or Twitter at Carl Radke.
My name is starts with AC spelled CARLRADKE.
And if you want to find anythingabout soft bar, we're on
Instagram and Tiktok. You can see videos of our
drinks, pictures of our space, some of the information about
(49:03):
our, you know, what we're doing.But we're opening this week
officially to the public. So I can't wait for just more
user generated content and people having fun and having
great experiences and just coming, you know, to see it.
So yeah, a lot of ways to find me.
And also, if you really want to like really watch, you can turn
on Bravo or Peacock and. You can see.
(49:25):
Me there too. I don't always, I don't always
recommend that, but you know, I I'm very proud.
I love what we do on Bravo. I love my friends, you know,
I've been doing reality TV for ten seasons.
Which is wow, it's a great show.It's a good show.
I mean, you guys are crushing it.
We love the whole cast. It's great.
We. We've been very fortunate people
(49:47):
like yourself. We've, we have an amazing fan
base and audience that I think has helped kind of carry this
because we're not like we're nota top 10 show.
It's not, you know, like we're Love Island and these other
shows. I mean, 20X the amount of
viewers, but we've kind of connected with this audience in
(50:09):
a, in a way that I think is really unmatched.
I feel really lucky that we've been able to do this so long.
Yeah, it's awesome. We're excited to see the new
release. So great, Carl.
Thank you really. Really good one coming up.
I'm not. Oh hell yeah.
Oh, really? Good news.
TuneIn y'all, it's good. Carl, you're the best.
Thank you so much for coming on.We will.
(50:31):
I have an idea. Yes.
You should come in to Soft Bar because if we have that studio
upstairs, you should record a New Yorker of the Week at Soft
Bar. Done.
Yeah, Carl. Done.
Abby, write it down. We're gonna.
You're gonna get an. E-mail from us Abby's like
regretting that you said that. I think that's and you can have
you know Nora, you could sip on a non alk beverage that we
(50:52):
create. Yeah.
You can kind of have that mindful connected conversation
over a functional drink or a nonAlec lover boy.
And that's kind of the whole idea is it's this kind of real
true third space where anyone can come but creators and local
friends. I want to host it.
We're going to be hosting events.
I actually had a the punk rock band there the night you were
(51:15):
there. They're called Daisy Grenade,
the lead singer. She's awesome and her guitarist
were there. They're sober.
Yeah. And they she, she was hoping to
do, you know, like a a show or aperformance.
And I was like, yeah, like that.We've been hit up by a lot of
artists and musical people also authors wanting to host their
(51:37):
book launches, podcasters wanting to host an event,
influencers, collaborators. So that is exciting because it's
also a playground for other folks and you know how they want
to activate in space. So I'm excited to have.
It's not just all about me. There's other, you know, folks
I'm hoping to have perform and come in and showcase their
(51:58):
creative. So I think you just opened up
though a can of worms for us comedy show.
We're going to want to, we're going to want to have defeat
this comedy. Show as long as I can do like 2
minutes I'm in. Absolutely.
I've got a, I've got a, I've gota, like a little bit of a bit I
can do, but. OK.
I'll be in for the professionals.
All right, we're we're followingup on all of this.
(52:20):
Yeah, we are amazing. It sounds like.
I mean, I think ultimately soft bar isn't just a bar of course,
like for non alcoholic drinks, but it's really like a place to
meet up and to build community and to be around new people.
And I think that that's something we really value too.
So. That's New York as well.
Yes, we love it. I appreciate you connecting with
that and you know you're welcomeback anytime.
(52:42):
Well, he'll be hearing from us. Yeah, we'll be knocking on your
upstairs. OK, So if you ever hear a knock,
it's out of us. You know, Carl, you're the best.
We will follow up with you. So hot for Sean is our he's our
production person because then he's gone.
Thank you so much. No, he.
Here we are, here we are. I just said while coming on that
I'm so ready to be a superstar. We are already superstars here
so. It's a state of mind.
You ready for it? The girl I babysit for him, she
only listens to Taylor Swift. And the other day I turned on.
(00:39):
I really wanted to listen to Haim, and we've just been
listening to a lot of Taylor Swift.
And I was just like, I really need a break and I really want
to listen to Haim. So I turned on Haim and I looked
at her and I said, she's like, what is this?
I was like, it's the new Taylor Swift album.
She was like, no, it's not. And I was like, yeah, it is.
Idiot you. Didn't like you, didn't see this
(01:01):
one drop. She's like, what is how old?
Is she, she's 6 and 96. You didn't, you didn't get the,
you didn't see that drop. She was like, I don't think this
is Taylor Swift. And I was like, yeah, it is.
And honestly, girl, this is the new album.
Yeah, with it. It was the new Hyme album which
is amazing. And that's good for her.
Yeah, she needs to listen to a little more.
(01:21):
She eventually was like, Nora, what's going on here?
And I was like. It's not Taylor Swift, but don't
you like it? It's look, they're friends, Heim
and Taylor Swift. It's all a bunch of ladies with
guitars. Come on, let's just.
Let's just let it expand ourselves a little bit.
Now let's take a second back though.
Let's take a step back. Stepping back.
(01:42):
Heim is superior to Taylor in somany different ways and I know a
lot of people are going to disagree with me, but like
Taylor's like the Walmart and Heim is like the cool Bushwick
Club. OK, I I would say more.
I know those things aren't really.
I would say maybe like Taylor islike Amazon.
(02:05):
No, I know you like saying that Taylor is like 40 is like Times
Square and like Heim is like thedive bar in Bushwick that like,
you know what I mean? Like.
The famous dive bar that just hold up in New York Times.
New York and go to Times Square,but then you get there and it's
kind of like the same and overwhelming.
(02:26):
Not maybe what you wanted, but then you go to this dive bar and
the drinks are cold and the people are hot and the music's
loud and you're like, now that'swhat I wanted.
That's what I wanted. Heinz there.
Walmart to Bushwick bar is harsh.
I my brother just made a group chat with me, my mom and his
wife. This is a.
(02:48):
New chat that has dropped. And it does it have a title.
It is a photo of my dead dad. Oh no.
OK so that's so assigned. Oh God no.
Why is he sending multiple pictures of my dad?
That's that's a tough one. Like give a.
Girl a heads up. I'm so sensitive today.
(03:10):
Oh, you know. Hey do you guys want to look at
old pictures of dad is a good question.
That's a good pic. I mean a good question.
Sorry, question. That's a good question.
Right. Like right?
Would you ever just start? People, people send me photos of
my dad, dad like just randomly and I'm like.
(03:31):
It's him at the hospital. Oh Jesus, it's sad that.
Is really sad. I love looking at pictures of
him healthy. Yeah, that's like, that's a
different category, right? I'm going to have to have a talk
with him and why? Why is Ally in it?
No offense, that's my brother's wife, but like.
She's not. She wasn't there for.
That and like right, it's like look at those four more
(03:51):
messages, OK, well, well that's now we're offline.
We are offline. Now it's Do not disturb.
It's. DND and they better not
override. That yeah, this is a literal
huge episode and my brother is for some reason bringing my dead
dad into. It sometimes the dead dad pops
up. I know.
But, and I guess this is literally moments ago in last
(04:14):
week's episode, what I was begging for, I was, I literally
was like, where is he? Where is he?
Yeah, he's right there. He's right.
There is today. Like an anniversary.
What is it? What day is it?
September 22nd. It's nothing.
It's not his birthday, nothing. It's not the day he died.
Nothing. It's it's nothing.
Just. September 22nd.
(04:35):
Ish ish. Well, sorry about that, Hannah.
It's OK, This is, you know what it this is, this is the classic
Randy and I have the same grief that we lost our dad, but we
deal with it in two different ways.
And this is to him some sort of comfort or coping.
And it is not even close to whatI want to do.
Randy, take the hen. Take the hen.
(04:59):
Your brother's name is Randy. Why it's just?
Such a like funny. It's my mom's maiden name,
Kimberly Randall. His name is Randall Randall
James. Her she had no middle name
Kimberly Randall. And now she has took my dad's
name So Kimberly Randall Jerlander.
Randy is Randall James Jerlander.
(05:20):
I just love it. I love the image of your mom
being like Randy. It's such a good, it's such a
good name to like. Yell at yeah.
It's like it made sense their name to like, be who he is.
You can't be. Like you have to yell at him.
You can't be like, you can't be like Brian.
He has to be like, you know, it has to be Paul or Paul.
(05:41):
No, that's not that doesn't work.
Randy, Randy. Randy.
So like he's pissing you off. Yeah, Randy.
Really, Randy? And that was, yeah, I got in
Randy like he was never up for school on time.
He never finished his homework. He Randy came home later than
it. Like it was like you had to yell
at him all the time. Yeah.
(06:02):
Looking at the cats. Today's a really big day.
It is. It is a big day.
We have an amazing guest on today.
I'm so excited and it it feels it's like a dream.
Yeah, it's kind of like, I don'tknow, I mean, do you believe?
Dreams can come true 'cause now I do.
I mean I I'm starting to believein manifesting after literally
(06:25):
30 minutes ago screaming about wanting a sign that my of my dad
and now without consent being sent like 7 bonus of him.
So I I also really believe in the power of you booking guests.
Like it's like Nora can make thedreams of the dreams come true.
I'm trying, but it's a collab effort without your beautiful
(06:49):
digital creations. That's so nice.
But like booking wise, like I can't imagine, like when
somebody follows up with me, I'mlike, I'm gonna kill myself.
It's a lot of back and forth, but this person was actually
very kind and like has a really large following, has a status,
is a person who people, they area person.
(07:13):
And he was just very chill down to earth and came on the pod and
was like, hey girls. And you guys will hear part of
it, but like he's he really likewanted to connect.
Yeah, he was really into connecting and and we love him.
Yeah, it was really great. And I mean, we thanks to like
(07:35):
Nora's booking, we get to interview a lot of cool people,
but we don't also get an extension to like be part of
what they're up to. Yeah.
So should we just release the the big surprise of who it is?
Because you guys probably know from the episode title. 123 Carl
Radke is the guest. Carl Radke listening.
(07:55):
Listening. Listening like what the?
And be like, well, what an announcement.
What an announcement. No Carl is he is a Bravo
Liberty. He was on summer House.
He he's now starting his own thing where he basically has
(08:16):
become like the sober and sober curious icon.
And I didn't really know about him until before and during the
interview. And like, he's really changed
his whole life. He's completely inspiring.
It's amazing. And he was like a star of the
show, and he's still the star ofthe show even as a sober person.
And he's created a beautiful barin Greenpoint.
(08:38):
Like it's like stunning. It's really beautiful.
And it's called Soft Bar and everyone should go to it.
And we talk a lot about it in this episode.
And we got to go to like one of the openings.
And we got, yeah, we got a private.
And that was really exciting. We got to hear him speak and we
got to meet other other influencers like us.
They seemed a little different than us.
(08:59):
They had like their ring lights and their.
Tripods. But yeah, there was one girl who
would not quit. She was on her game.
It's like equal parts like cringe and impressive.
It's amazing. I'm like, how do you do?
That and it's like, I know I need you to do that 'cause I go
home and I watch the videos thatpeople like her post, you know,
like I watch Influencer's Day inmy life.
(09:21):
But when you're watching them doit, it's like it's another
level. It's level.
I'm sorry, that's my next. My next step in booking is being
more active in person in a photosituation.
I'm not like, hey, can we get a photo?
I'm always just like we kind of to connect and talk to people on
(09:42):
that it. Feels undocumented.
I just don't. Like documenting it, it feels it
feels inauthentic. I know, but.
It's like like we should have, we did try to take pictures.
So the drinks at soft bar are, are incredible.
They are all non alcoholic, which I love 'cause you know, so
we're queen over here and I, we were trying to take photo like a
static photos and we kept posingwith little things and it really
(10:07):
wasn't working out. But then I like thought I got
the shot. We were like, I got it, I got
it. And then they looked and we were
like, they like we're sharing people's tagging them like in
their Instagram story. And it I got to see like what
everyone else's shot looked likenext to mine.
And I was like, I didn't even, It's like how, how do people
know how to take a picture of like 2 drinks and like their
(10:31):
purse? And it looks like the chicest
thing. It's really.
Cool. I'm like, I don't know, if
someone could just tell me that,that would be amazing.
Give her a sign. Cuz like clear here we go give.
Me a sign. Someone just tell me how to do
that. Send me 7 photos in a tutorial.
With Alkins, it is really crazy,but we.
(10:53):
Yeah. So we had a really wonderful
time at the private opening. You were invited?
Only we were. And no, I'm just kidding.
There probably were some people invited that were listening to
this. Maybe.
Maybe. Not no way.
No way. It was super exclusive.
No way. So.
You had to be on the list. And if you did, keep that to
yourself. Yeah, we don't want to hear
about it. Because as you can see, we're
kind of on one about being invited.
(11:14):
So please keep it to yourself. If you're very excited.
But yeah. And then Carl was just such a
joy to interview. And now I'm like, where do we go
next? Like, I don't even know who to
interview next. I'm like we I reached out to the
pet psychic. But like, I don't know.
We're gonna oh, I actually was thinking something.
OK, so just timing wise, the next episode we need a guest on
(11:37):
is the 30th of October, which isthe day before Halloween.
So maybe we should find a psychic or something like
Spooky. Yeah, the pet psychic.
The pet psychic, But she's kind of like more entertainment.
We need someone who's going to like, give us, give us like a
spooky tale. OK, OK, let.
Me, we could even go to 1. Maybe a magician?
(12:00):
Definitely a magician. Oh my God, that's amazing.
A New York. Magician and we will ask
Dorinda. We're going to chat with her on
Wednesday. You.
Know I really hope I can get outof this interview on Wednesday.
You're gonna manifest it. Just yell it.
It's weaponing, yelling the way I was.
(12:21):
Well, I hope everyone enjoys this.
We're not gonna do a super long intro because the this interview
was so wonderful and we ended upinterviewing him for a little
bit longer than we anticipated in a great way because we had a
lot to talk. About we had the our zoom stop
and then we were like silently typing, typing, typing,
(12:41):
Googling, Googling, Googling to get back into that call.
We if there's any two people that can troubleshoot.
It's us. You should have seen it here.
Tech wise, they're sitting righthere.
Right here, Nora and Hannah. We're if there's if there's a
problem, I'm not gonna give up. It's not gonna maybe be the
fastest way or the right way, but it's gonna, it's gonna solve
the problem. It's gonna get you there.
(13:02):
And I hate when people are like,don't do it quick, do it the
right way. No, no, I'm doing it quick.
And we're doing it the right. Way Yeah, we happen to do both
we happen to do both Wow. Nothing my.
Pace just got really itchy for some reason.
Really. Yeah, it's pretty late.
It's 9. It's a late.
(13:22):
So there's if there's a time when the faces get itchy.
It's a late, It's a late night, it's late.
For us to record at this hour, this is crazy.
For this is like what podcastersall over the world do, though.
They're like, yeah, I wanna comeby the studio at 10:00 PM and
I'm like, what's going on in your cheek?
I'm looking in the side of my life, but I think I have some of
(13:42):
the candy. We had some candy from last
episode. Yeah, you guys might remember
from last episode. The candy.
The candy. Well, it's here this week as
well. It's.
Back All right, everyone enjoy this incredible interview and
yeah, we'll we might never have a guess this big again so we
(14:03):
will we will just kidding. The Sky's the limit, and even
that is. We've had a lot of Bravo
liberties on, yeah, we're reallyracking up.
A we're heading into and they'restill all New York.
Jason Yep. And connected.
So that's. Very important to us.
And that is huge for. Us and Carl, will he have ran
the marathon yet or no? No, it's like a really far it's
(14:24):
long way. OK.
No, it's, it's in November. OK.
And this comes out in October? OK, so we can't say.
And then he won the marathon. If he wins the marathon, that
would be, I would say that he would, Oh my God, two year.
It's coming through the headphone.
I know it's really great to see my cat.
(14:45):
She wants she wants this wrappedup and she wants me out of here
so you guys can play in peace. Play in peace, all right?
Yeah. He hasn't won the marathon yet.
Love you too. Bye bye.
All right, awesome. Guest is here.
Guest is here. Today we have a really fun
guest. I'm really excited about this.
(15:05):
Today's New Yorker of the Week is Carl Radke.
You may know him from Summer House, but these days he's
making waves as the founder of Soft Bar in New York, which is a
new non alcoholic bar that we. Both go to the open.
We did get to. Very exciting.
Carl has become a voice in the sober and sober curious
(15:25):
community. He's training for the New York
City Marathon and he has a book coming out later this year.
I believe it's called Cake Eater, but yeah, welcome, Carl.
Thanks for joining us. Welcome.
To the podcast. Thank you for having me.
I'm honored to be introduced as such.
That was a really good introduction.
Thank you. Awesome.
Cool. Well, thanks for coming on.
(15:48):
We're really happy to have. You having us at the opening of
Softbar, that was, yeah, We wereso excited to be there.
That was. Really fun that was.
Glad you guys, glad you had a good time.
I'm glad you got to see it. You know, I think it's been a,
it's been a process getting to that point.
But yeah, it was cool to kind ofpull back the curtain and show,
you know, kind of our close friends and family and local
(16:09):
friends, you know, what's going on.
But you know, this week we are officially open to the public.
So. Excited for that, you know,
doing the soft openings has beengreat, but you know, we wanted I
wanted to be open sooner to be completely honest, but things
take you know, some time and just the way the world works so.
Yeah. And so for people who don't
(16:30):
know, can you say tell us how like Soft Bar came to be?
Yeah, so I I've been in the alcohol industry since 2018.
Loverboy, the neon sign behind my shoulder.
I was a founding member of an alcohol company with two of my
best friends, Kyle Cook and Amanda Botula, and started
(16:51):
there, you know, helping with them building the brand.
I was the VP of sales, but then I got sober in January of 2021
and working in the alcohol industry, not drinking is a very
eye opening experience. I saw a lot of things as a
consumer, you know, there was lack of options, there was a
lack of places to go consume nonout drinks.
(17:15):
And I just have been kind of seeing things that I wanted
differently. You know, I wanted if I'm
drinking a non alcohol, I drink,I want something that's low
sugar and low calorie. I don't want more sugar and more
carbs. I wanted a cool place to hang
out, something that I could bring friends and people that
still drink, but would go there for a little bit and just take a
break or have fun. So I really set out of the last
(17:39):
almost three years been kind of thinking about this concept of
creating, you know, a third space, a place where you can go
any time of day and have a really great non alcoholic
beverage, but also sit down, connect with a friend, be on
your computer by yourself. And one way I wanted to do that
was take the coffee culture and non out culture and combine
(18:00):
them. So what I created is Soft Bar,
which is a bar and Cafe where not only coffee, but also
alternative coffee and functional drinks and soft
cocktails, which is what most people would think of as a
mocktail. However, we don't serve
mocktails at Soft Bar. We're not making fun of
anything. It's all very intentional.
Oh, I like that, yeah. So yeah, it's soft bar was, you
(18:24):
know, born officially last year,August 1st, 2024.
We started as a mobile pop up. I have a really cool sprinter
van that's been, you know, kind of customized with taps and
refrigeration. So we were doing brand events
and activations from the Hamptons to the to New York City
last year. We did some stuff for dry
January and then, you know, we got the space in Brooklyn.
(18:47):
We got our lease signed in January, started building in
March and doors open middle of September.
So really proud of it. But I think, you know, there's
been a lot of excitement for it and it's been amazing and so
cool to see people connect with this concept and if anything are
just like harassing me when it'sgoing to be open because they're
so excited to come. But I don't think people realize
(19:10):
how not only much attention to detail we put into this, we
really didn't just I didn't justrent an old bar and put paint on
it and say this is soft bar. I started from scratch with a
industrial space in Greenpoint, Brooklyn that is in a really
cool neighborhood with a lot of Wellness, great restaurants,
great coffee shops. But what I wanted was something
(19:32):
that still had like a feeling and a vibe.
And so we kind of created a really high design coffee and
bar inside of a cool industrial space.
The space is beautiful, by the way.
When we were there like that waslike everyone was talking about.
They were obviously talking about like you and the drinks of
course, but also like this. No, I want them to talk about
(19:52):
they want them to talk about thespace.
I mean, my, my hope from the beginning is, and I do.
I've done this personally. Like I've gone, I live in Green
Point, I go to Devocion, I've gone to sweet Leaf, I go to
partners, I go to all these places.
I go to Devocion. And when I said to myself the
first time I walked in there, I'm like.
This is fucking cool. Like I would I would hang out
(20:13):
here even if they don't serve anything I want to drink.
And guess what? Devocion doesn't really serve
anything I drink because I don'tdrink coffee.
So it's funny because I think I think people hopefully will get
the feeling when they come to software, they're going to go,
oh, this is cool. I'd still hang out here even
though they don't have maybe alcohol or what I'm hoping for.
So I think we've hopefully done that.
(20:35):
But the drinks, the food, you know, the programming, the
music, my staff, our team, it all has to come together too,
outside of those things as well.But the feeling you get, I hope.
I'm glad to hear you had a good feeling when you were there so.
Yeah, we even got the bathroom. One little check on the box.
Yeah, even the bathroom, we werelike, I was like, you got to get
(20:56):
in there. I was like, I'm trying, I'm
trying. You don't drink coffee.
What's up with the coffee? More anxious.
So how do? How are you here right now?
What's going? On how are you opening a bar
without like opening a sophomore?
I don't. Want to?
I don't want to get it twisted. I still drink caffeine but from
other sources like green tea, matcha, it's a lower intensity.
(21:19):
Yeah. But there's a lot of science out
there about coffee, and if you drink coffee like the first
thing you wake. Up.
It actually. Increases it right As you said
it it it's. Like it increases your, your
cortisol levels, which is the producer of stress and anxiety
in your body. It just naturally does that.
Like just drinking more coffee makes you, it elevates that
(21:40):
level of, and I, for me, I'm, I have anxiety and depression.
You know, my mental health is very important to me.
And coffee wasn't necessarily supporting me in the way that it
might support others. But I thought coffee, the coffee
culture and the the community ofa coffee shop is something that
gets lost in non alk. It's like, oh, you're doing non
(22:02):
alk, It's just non alk. It's like, no, like people still
want these other alternatives and or also a great coffee.
So we have the best coffee you can find and also alternative
coffee that you can't find either.
That cherry drink with the coffee in it was delicious.
I don't know if you had. There's a blue one that's called
(22:23):
like the Blizzard Bliss. That's a tea.
I think that's. What you had right, you had.
The the tea has a chemical reaction to the coconut and the
citrus in the liquid and it turns blue, which is why that is
blue. So we're doing a lot of like
more advanced elevated like specialty coffee beverages and
also specialty non out beverages.
(22:44):
Wow, yeah, I think I need to quit coffee then, because
everything that he was describing.
No, I mean coffee. I don't, We don't want to sit
here and say coffee's bad. I think a lot of people love
it's great. But I I have a personal theory
deep down in my body. I think a lot of our population
is over caffeinated, which is why we're so anxious.
Because we like. Our phones and our tech, it's
(23:05):
all like in our faces and then you're drinking a substance that
makes you more anxious, so. Yeah.
And I would say that most peoplehave like a coffee or two a day,
but then also have things that maybe they're not like clocking
has caffeine and like I have like a Diet Coke like every
night at 8:00 PM like that's. That's probably.
Not ideal. You know what they call diet
(23:26):
Cokes in like a a It's a fridge cigarette.
Wow my mom had like 4 a day. I'm smoking.
Diet Cokes have in their place. Diet Cokes have their place for
sure. I mean, you know, when I stopped
drinking almost five years ago, you know, you find things that
work for you. You know, some people smoke or
drink coffee or whatever it might be, but that's a much
(23:49):
better alternative for for thosethan alcohol or hard drugs.
So for me, I've but a soda waterguy, loverboy.
We have a non alcoholic sparkling tea, but it's only 10
calories and 0 sugar. So I'm very particular about my
non alk because I'm just becauseI'm not drinking, I don't want
like another sugary thing. So that's also the white space
(24:11):
and what I've seen as a consumer, but also working in
the alcohol industry, a lot of things are still very unhealthy,
but presenting themselves as a non alcohol great.
It's not out, but what's in it? Yeah, I feel like we I get a lot
of ads for like because I'm sober myself and I I get a lot
of ads of like you should try this drink.
(24:32):
It has tons of like different mushrooms in it and weed.
One was breeze. It was mushrooms and weed.
I drank one of them and I completely lost my mind.
I was like, this is worse than like any blackout I've ever like
this will not ever have. But like, you know, it was
pretty bad. Feel like you're casual?
Some of those canned beverages that have CBDTHC, other
(24:56):
functional ingredients, the doses are pretty high so I don't
consume those drinks either. I've tried a few over the last
few years but like you're saying, I don't love the feeling
I get. We are exploring at soft bar low
low, very small dose CBD functional options.
(25:18):
That would be 1 milligram or less, which won't give you that
feeling that you were getting from like a 5 milligram or 10.
But yeah, I'm with you on some of the those functional THC and
stuff because it's, it's too high in my opinion.
And you get like mind altered and we're not doing anything
mind altering at soft bar. Yeah, I definitely, it was not
(25:41):
functional. I didn't feel functional.
I had to go home. Yeah, I was like, I gotta go.
This is not this is not a brass,I feel.
That's not what you want in the social setting either.
Like at a social event, you wantto like talk to people and feel
good and you're gonna be like inthe corner like, Oh my God,
you're. Mine.
Yeah. I was like, I need to go home
and like listen to Elsie. And Nora's like life of the
party, Like we can't have her drinking stuff that's gonna have
(26:03):
her going home early. OK, Speaking of partying, this
is our one Summer House question'cause we do need to bring it
up. When you first signed on to
Summer House, what were your expectations like?
Did you ever imagine becoming such a strong role model for the
sober and sober curious community?
Like, was that ever on your mind?
No, OK, no. I mean, that's what I think the
(26:25):
beauty of kind of how my life has kind of gotten to this
point. You know, growing up in my
family, alcohol was a big part of our family.
You know, I had some family members that looking back now,
yeah, I mean, they struggled. I mean, there was a lot of that.
So I was always surrounded by itgrowing up.
But to think that when I joined,being on TV or signed up for it,
(26:50):
you know, I partied hard back then and I thought I'd be like
the likeable party boy. But the result was the opposite
of that. I, you know, it was a very
sobering, dare I say that word, watching myself back under the
influence. And, you know, I didn't, I was
drinking a lot. I took Adderall, I would do
(27:11):
cocaine off camera and after hours, but also just very
unstable all around. So but it's been a beautiful
journey of being a part of the show and being able to like
really open up. And I'd say in the last five
years of doing it, it's been really powerful, just being
really honest. And like, it took me some time
(27:32):
to realize that I was, you know,an alcoholic and a drug addict.
Once I made that commitment and raised my hand and got the help
I needed, it's been amazing to still be a part of this.
And they give me the opportunityto to do it.
So yeah, I, I never, if you would have held a gun in my head
10 years ago and said you're going to be doing all this
(27:53):
stuff, I would have literally said I'm going to take the gun
from you and shoot you now because you're insane.
Interesting. Yeah.
But I used to also when people would tell me way back when, 10
years ago that they were not drinking or sober, I would make
fun of it. And I think a lot of that was
also my insecurity inside and what they say.
And at least my experiences in going to a A and my sponsor, if
(28:15):
you spot it, you got it. And a lot of people typically
are uncomfortable with your drinking or not are also deep
down inside. That's where that behavior comes
from is their own discomfort with their relationship with
alcohol. OK, I snapped because dating is
a nightmare for me personally sometimes because some guys are
(28:37):
like, are you serious? You're not going to drink?
And it's like, why are you pushing me to drink?
This is like getting. Right, this is a date we're
trying to get to know each other.
Like if me not drinking is goingto ruin the date then like I
don't know what. It's so crazy and people get
really like, they keep asking you questions, why didn't you
drink? It's like I stopped drinking
because life was so great that Iwanted to stop drinking.
Like, what do? What do you want the answer to
be right? Well, you know.
(28:58):
What I get really honest I if people press or don't.
Yeah. You know, I'd say I, I, I'm an
alcoholic, I couldn't control mydrinking and it became
unmanageable. And this is just the best way
for me to operate. And I'm sorry if it makes you a
little uncomfortable, but this is what is best for me, you
know? Wow, I need to write that down.
(29:19):
Yeah, we'll. Get write that down.
I get it a lot, but there are people that will walk up to me
and not be familiar with the show or whatever and see me
drinking something different. And they I've had a lot of that,
but I actually enjoy just kind of being like, no, I'm an
alcoholic. They're like, OK, they like
(29:40):
slowly fade away. Yeah, they like.
Expect I just, I wear like I'm proud.
Like I think the more you can beproud of being honest about your
flaws or the things that you struggle with.
I don't know. It's been really for me, it's
like, OK, if you don't like me because I'm being real or
honest, like that's fine. I'd rather be dated for what I
am than like for what I'm not. Whoa, OK, these are really,
(30:04):
there's some kind of like reallygood quotable moment.
Yeah, these are quotable moments.
Speaking of. Dating though in New York what
like what is your obviously going to soft bar is like the
perfect date but like what is your idea of like the perfect
sober date. I would say, I mean, honestly,
you got to have some food and and a date.
I mean, I like to snack and eat.So definitely either pick like a
(30:27):
cool spot that has good appetizers or things that you
can talk while eating. I have gone on 1st dates where
you get a big burger and you're like wiping your face after
every bite trying to have a conversation and it's not great,
but you know, food for sure. But after you get a little bite
to eat and maybe a non alcoholicbeverage or a coffee, go for a
walk, you know, get your legs moving, do some little walking
(30:50):
and then always got to finish with either like an ice cream or
some sort of sweet and then takethe ice cream.
It's. Like a long day.
This is like. More this is when you got like
the person when. Do you put in OK you.
Don't like them? If you don't like them, then
you're not getting ice cream. Go get just an appetizer if you
don't like them, OK? But OK, I would say is meet up
at either a cool coffee shop, have a beverage and then go for
(31:13):
a walk. If it's going well, maybe go and
get some ice cream, but I like doing a little bit of food and
beverage and then going for a walk.
For a walk could be through Mccarran Park.
I live closer to the water in Green Point, so I like to walk
along the water. The pier sunset, that is
(31:33):
typically like a cool first. I'd also say workout classes or
yoga could be a fun kind of if you know that person is into
that stuff. Like a workout thing and then
after the workout grab a juice or smoothie or something.
That's nice. Are you dating right now?
I'm single, but yeah, I've been dating for the last few months
(31:57):
trying to, I haven't, I haven't met that person, but I've
definitely been putting myself out there.
And you know, I'm, I've been really focused on my business as
well. To be honest, it's been
challenging to find. Having a kid.
Exactly. It is like opening a new
business. It's like being a parent.
It's like non-stop attention. It is, and I you know, I'm I was
(32:20):
filming all summer, so you know,I've I've gone on some dates,
but the date I was actually describing was a date I went on
like the the ice cream and then the wok, which was nice, which
was a really nice. We watched the sunset.
It was really nice, but it. Was really nice.
That's romantic. What do you have any?
Do you have any, like, advice for fellow New Yorkers that are
(32:42):
like dreaming of opening up a shop in New York or like any
sort of storefront or anything like that?
Yeah, I'd say first do mobile. OK.
Pop up first, try it out not only for yourself, but see if it
works. You're going to get feedback.
You're going to learn a lot in those kind of early things.
(33:06):
I wouldn't recommend like signing a lease first.
Work out the kinks of what you're doing in a smaller way.
Get your local friends and or get your friends, your family
and the people closest to you tocome and support that little and
see what they think. And you use that information and
expand. I think a lot of people just
(33:27):
immediately just put something in your face and they want to go
big right away. I'm a believer in kind of
building one step at a time. So yeah, my advice would be, you
know, don't sign a lease out of the gate.
Give yourself a little time to like really figure out what this
business model is, what you're serving, how it all works.
I mean, our first pop up we did over a year ago, just like
(33:51):
putting it together. We, we had 15 drinks on the
menu, which was insane. Like it was a lot for us
logistically and from a like a workflow.
So we actually the next pop up we're like, we're not doing 15
drinks again because we can't like, so you learn a lot in
those early kind of pop ups and kind of small activation.
So I, that's what I would recommend before you ever sign
(34:14):
your lease, do a due diligence test.
And what I mean by that, it's kind of like getting a home
inspection before you like send your mortgage payments in.
There's not termites or mold or asbestos.
What I mean by that is like do the research on the
neighborhood, the building, the adjacent businesses and
(34:35):
companies, the foot traffic fromsubway to subway, bus station to
bus station, ferry connections, all of that.
Like do your due diligence on a location before you sign a
lease. And that's probably the two
things I would say out of the gates.
But I, I don't, I don't have it all figured out.
These are some things I've learned from other entrepreneurs
(34:57):
that you know I look up to and have given me some guidance.
Did you ever receive any feedback from friends?
And you were like, I'm not goingto listen to you?
That doesn't sound right. All the time.
I mean my favorite, which, whichis this is I've done, we've got
a lot of, I'm very, very passionate about this and I've
(35:19):
spent a lot of time networking and meeting different people,
financial entrepreneurs, venturecapital, private equity.
So you get a lot of feedback andafter, you know, like a very,
very successful businessman do the pitch.
(35:40):
I think I'm, you know, I'm, I just talk like I I live and
breathe this. He he's like, so there's no
alcohol. I'm like, I just go back.
I'm like, yeah, that. This might.
Not be a good fit. Like that, that's he's like, you
sure you're not going to do justone alcoholic beverage?
(36:00):
I'm like, no, this is that. This is why we're doing.
What? I said like no.
So honestly, it was good, it wasgood feedback because it's stuff
we've had to actually like be able to answer properly.
The question is, will you have agroup of five women, three of
them drink, the other two don't.What are they going to do if
(36:21):
they want to go to, if the threewant to go drink, they're not
going to go to soft bar is what people say.
So like, how do you answer that?And I answer, well, actually the
two friends that aren't drinkingaren't going to go to the bar.
And that's the rest of the threeactually might just not go now
because of the group isn't going.
So there's ways to like work with the feedback you're getting
(36:43):
to help you refine your approachand your strategy and just what
you're all about. So I appreciate feedback.
I've been told no on this business a lot.
A lot people can't wrap their head around not having alcohol
in your business model because in New York, majority of the
(37:05):
margin that businesses are making their money off of is not
necessarily from food. Food costs are very high, labor
costs are high. You're basically breaking even
there. Where you're making your money
is on You buy a bottle of Tito'sfor $30.
You sell 40 drinks out of it for$13 each.
You make $300 on each bottle of Tito's that you sell.
(37:27):
The margin on alcohol is significant in a bar setting,
which now the shift of alcohol sales is eating up that pie.
But what they're not looking at is this other elements of what I
believe creates some business success, which is coffee day
parts. You have other options in your
day. Most bars only have one day part
(37:47):
from 4:00 to midnight on 7:00 AMto 12:12 to 5:00 five to close.
So there's something in there for everyone.
But you know, we're hopeful withour business model since it's
not selling alcohol, but it picks up in other ways that so
some people haven't been able towrap their head around that a
little bit, which I understand we're doing something new.
(38:11):
But I really believe the team I put together and not only the
just kind of the business operation, we've secured low
rent. I've got a lean operation.
We have baristas and bartenders that can do both, also
generating revenue from other ways, partnerships and brands,
private events, public events, social media, merch and also
(38:34):
direct to consumer products. So it's more than just a bar,
but it's also, I feel like when all comes to life is in the like
where it all comes to life is atthe four walls, but we're
extending the brand outside of the four walls in different
ways. We're also licensing our menu.
So if you're a, for example, if you're like a fitness concept
(38:56):
and you're serving maybe Celsiusand a cool soda water, they're
now looking for maybe another functional option or a cool
hydration option. We are going to be curating our
menu and some of those fitness concepts, you know, brought to
you by Soft Bar and it would be some of our curated options for
you. So there's other ways we're kind
of extending the brand outside of the four walls.
(39:17):
Sorry to cut you off. No, no, it's OK.
I cut you off too. I was just saying, I also feel
like they're not thinking about and we see this a lot in comedy.
There's just more, and I don't wanna call it a trend, but
there's more people sober now. I feel like there's more people
who they don't want to be out late, they don't want to get
drunk, they don't want to be hungover.
Like I just feel like they're not thinking about like, yeah,
of course there was a time in New York where, like serving
(39:39):
drinks made you a ton of money. But like, I don't really feel
like that's as much as the what's going on right now.
I see a lot more people very into fitness, very into movement
and very into like alternatives or just like not drinking at
all. And that's why like we see a lot
of people like spending their time.
So I feel like they don't think about how the like alcohol
(40:00):
business and has like shifted genuinely and especially in New
York. Yeah.
Well, I mean, it's definitely, yeah, there's, there's a huge,
I, I see it a little bit in some, I mean, a lot of places we
love and frequent over the yearsin New York, you know, place
close, it places close, but a lot of it is rent and operation
in New York is obviously expensive, but a lot of places
(40:23):
that typically we're making moremoney from alcohol that aren't,
but you still have a $30,000 a month lease.
It's getting a little tricky. And I, I sympathize and
empathize with a lot of the bar owners and restaurant owners
because it's an industry. Like there's a lot at stake here
with people with lives and families and children and
they've made money working in the alcohol industry.
(40:45):
But there's not only been a hugecultural shift in folks like our
age in their, you know, late 20s, thirties, 40s, but you have
also the the Gen. Z generation who is not drinking
really at all. Yes, they're vaping and doing
edibles, but there's just been amassive shift.
And I think we're in a really good position to kind of capture
(41:05):
that. But you know, it'll be
interesting to see how other bars and restaurants adapt to
this. I go to bars all the time.
I was at one yesterday for four hours.
I didn't spend $1.00 because they don't have anything I would
actually buy. I just wanted to hang out with
my friends. I drank water, didn't spend a
dollar. I always say that when I go on a
date I'm like I'm a cheap date. Although one time I did have 4
(41:28):
Shirley Temples on a date and that was really weird and he was
like this is kind of crazy and I'm like well you just had 4
beers so we're like on the same page now.
What's wrong with? 4 Shirley Temples that's.
And when I asked the bartender for it, I was like Shirley
Temple. Like for a child, not a dirty
Shirley. Like, don't act like that.
You would give a child. That's what I want.
(41:48):
Like when a kid is having like aspecial night at.
A special night. 2 special night.
My 10th birthday. It's my 10th birthday.
OK, We're almost out of time. Quickly, though, we really
wanted to cover your book. Like what?
So you're opening a bar, you're filming, and you're writing a
book, and you're training for the marathon.
(42:08):
This is nuts. Carl, I already wrote the book.
Yeah, I know. But it's coming out from the
plate, so that's off. So it's coming out this
December, right? Is that correct?
December 30th I, you know, in inhardcover with Simon and
Schuster. Really excited about that.
And then I also did my audio book.
I narrated my own book with Audible.
(42:32):
So Audible will also have that experience, which is really
exciting because there's two consumers these days which I
didn't fully process. It makes a lot of sense.
And you have people that love just audio.
You have people that just love print.
Some people, some people do both, but they're almost 2
separate audiences. And I'm excited because my story
being so personal, me reading myown words and story, I think
(42:56):
will carry another level of of kind of reader experience that I
think will be really cool and unique.
So I spent a couple days by a couple days, about 6 days at
Audibles Studios reading and doing all of it, which is really
honestly emotional. I was challenging just because
it's like I really open up and I'm as raw and vulnerable as
(43:17):
I've ever been. Yeah.
Talking about my life leading upto what a lot of people have
seen on TV, but there's a lot ofthings that have really shaped
my drug addiction, my alcoholism, things I've been
through, my childhood, family, stuff that's going on and I
think hopefully will help other people.
And the reason I wanted to do this was I wanted to tell my
(43:39):
authentic story and hopefully one person reads it and gets
help or feels more confident to share that they struggle.
I felt it was important to use my platform to help inspire
others. Now, yes, like it's cool to have
your name on a, on a book and doall that.
But I had a publisher that really believed in my story.
(44:00):
And she said, you know, Carl, regardless of the bravo side of
things, I really think you have an important story to be told.
And she's a publisher out of Canada.
She's an amazing woman and really believed in what I was
talking about. So I, it's almost been over 2
1/2, three years in the making the book stuff and I came up
with the title all of my own. I had all of these notes and
(44:23):
chapters and things, but she really helped me dig deeper in a
lot of my youth and stories frommy past to, you know, put it all
together so. Wow, Everyone on Summer House
has to step up. You're like the hero of Summer
House. The standard.
Yeah, it's like everything. You're so earnest.
You you're doing so, so many good things for people.
(44:43):
Everyone I told, like when we were like telling people about
like interviewing you was like, it's such nice things to say.
Like you, you're the hero. Do look up to you I think.
You're the hero of Summer House,just as.
I I appreciate that, Nora. And I must say, I, I think I get
more credit than I deserve. Probably.
(45:04):
I also, you know, I'm, I'm flawed.
I'm still just cuz I got sober doesn't mean I'm not an asshole
or can be a Dick or have my moments of reactivity.
But I'm, you know, I'm proud of what I've been able to
accomplish. And honestly, you said I'm doing
a lot of things and that's how Istay sober is like having these
goals and having these like passions of mine, but getting
(45:27):
clear headed and getting some ofthat stuff out of the way.
And I'm just laser focused on these things where before
drinking or cocaine use or hungover or all of that was my
excuse around a time or on this or on that.
But I this is like what I'm supposed to do and what I want
to do. So now I have the energy to go
(45:48):
for it. But it's been stuff that's been
the kind of like brewing for thelast almost 2 1/2 three years.
But I kind of listed out like this is all very connected.
Everything I'm doing, like soft bar is part of the lifestyle
that I I live and embody. I wanted to share my story of
that lifestyle that I live and embody.
I want to talk about these stories and conversations with
other folks that have gone through similar things, the
(46:11):
podcast, my mental health and just staying mentally sound
running and also running for an organization that helps
addiction and sobriety relief recovery.
So I'm raising money for the NewYork City Marathon on their
behalf and the dollars and fundsthat I raised will actually help
sponsor someone who's strugglingwith rehab services, counseling,
(46:37):
halfway home or a place to live sober support and for me to run
for. I wanted to run personally, but
if running to help, also give someone money so they can afford
help is like amazing. So just all the kind of the
stuff that like is all connected.
They all like cohesive, which isreally exciting.
(46:57):
So it doesn't even feel like I'mthat I'm busy.
Abby, my assistant is on the call would be like rolling her
eyes right now, but it all like it's all amazing stuff.
And I, I feel very lucky and grateful that I'm in this
position. And you know, a lot of people
believed in me and supported me and I, I haven't done this
alone. Like it's been truly my friends
(47:18):
and Abby on this call. I've had a lot of, I've been
very lucky too, very privileged like I've been, I have certain
resources and tools that are afforded me because of reality
TV that others don't have. So it's not lost on me that it
can be really hard for others out there that aren't in some of
the positions I'm in. So I try to stay humble and stay
(47:39):
grounded and just, you know, it's one day at a time.
Wow, Carl, you really are New Yorker of the Week.
Thank you. You're.
Coming up and telling us more about everything.
Where can everyone find you on social?
You can find me well, I was going to say you can find me a
200 Banker St. Soft bar's location.
(47:59):
I won't be there all I mean I saw someone I was I stopped by a
bar to watch football yesterday after a workout class and
someone was like, are you going to be at soft bar like every
day? And I'm like I maybe.
You're like, I hope not every time I.
Don't want to be like the like the big boy mascot outside of
the diner. Like I don't know if that's a
(48:20):
reference. You guys get it?
All but no I understand. I will be there for the most
part but upstairs in our officesbut if you can't find me at soft
bar. Go upstairs.
Yeah, upstairs, backstairs. Knock on the office store and
Carl will be there as a mines. Yeah, when you start off.
At soft bar or downstairs, but also on on social media.
(48:41):
You can find me on Instagram or Tiktok or Twitter at Carl Radke.
My name is starts with AC spelled CARLRADKE.
And if you want to find anythingabout soft bar, we're on
Instagram and Tiktok. You can see videos of our
drinks, pictures of our space, some of the information about
(49:03):
our, you know, what we're doing.But we're opening this week
officially to the public. So I can't wait for just more
user generated content and people having fun and having
great experiences and just coming, you know, to see it.
So yeah, a lot of ways to find me.
And also, if you really want to like really watch, you can turn
on Bravo or Peacock and. You can see.
(49:25):
Me there too. I don't always, I don't always
recommend that, but you know, I I'm very proud.
I love what we do on Bravo. I love my friends, you know,
I've been doing reality TV for ten seasons.
Which is wow, it's a great show.It's a good show.
I mean, you guys are crushing it.
We love the whole cast. It's great.
We. We've been very fortunate people
(49:47):
like yourself. We've, we have an amazing fan
base and audience that I think has helped kind of carry this
because we're not like we're nota top 10 show.
It's not, you know, like we're Love Island and these other
shows. I mean, 20X the amount of
viewers, but we've kind of connected with this audience in
(50:09):
a, in a way that I think is really unmatched.
I feel really lucky that we've been able to do this so long.
Yeah, it's awesome. We're excited to see the new
release. So great, Carl.
Thank you really. Really good one coming up.
I'm not. Oh hell yeah.
Oh, really? Good news.
TuneIn y'all, it's good. Carl, you're the best.
Thank you so much for coming on.We will.
(50:31):
I have an idea. Yes.
You should come in to Soft Bar because if we have that studio
upstairs, you should record a New Yorker of the Week at Soft
Bar. Done.
Yeah, Carl. Done.
Abby, write it down. We're gonna.
You're gonna get an. E-mail from us Abby's like
regretting that you said that. I think that's and you can have
you know Nora, you could sip on a non alk beverage that we
(50:52):
create. Yeah.
You can kind of have that mindful connected conversation
over a functional drink or a nonAlec lover boy.
And that's kind of the whole idea is it's this kind of real
true third space where anyone can come but creators and local
friends. I want to host it.
We're going to be hosting events.
I actually had a the punk rock band there the night you were
(51:15):
there. They're called Daisy Grenade,
the lead singer. She's awesome and her guitarist
were there. They're sober.
Yeah. And they she, she was hoping to
do, you know, like a a show or aperformance.
And I was like, yeah, like that.We've been hit up by a lot of
artists and musical people also authors wanting to host their
(51:37):
book launches, podcasters wanting to host an event,
influencers, collaborators. So that is exciting because it's
also a playground for other folks and you know how they want
to activate in space. So I'm excited to have.
It's not just all about me. There's other, you know, folks
I'm hoping to have perform and come in and showcase their
(51:58):
creative. So I think you just opened up
though a can of worms for us comedy show.
We're going to want to, we're going to want to have defeat
this comedy. Show as long as I can do like 2
minutes I'm in. Absolutely.
I've got a, I've got a, I've gota, like a little bit of a bit I
can do, but. OK.
I'll be in for the professionals.
All right, we're we're followingup on all of this.
(52:20):
Yeah, we are amazing. It sounds like.
I mean, I think ultimately soft bar isn't just a bar of course,
like for non alcoholic drinks, but it's really like a place to
meet up and to build community and to be around new people.
And I think that that's something we really value too.
So. That's New York as well.
Yes, we love it. I appreciate you connecting with
that and you know you're welcomeback anytime.
(52:42):
Well, he'll be hearing from us. Yeah, we'll be knocking on your
upstairs. OK, So if you ever hear a knock,
it's out of us. You know, Carl, you're the best.
We will follow up with you. So hot for Sean is our he's our
production person because then he's gone.
Thank you so much. No, he.
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