Newbie Star Trek

Descent! It turns out Data gets really, really horned up when he kills dudes. Huh. Should we be worried about that? Everyone? Oh the Borg are back? Is that related? What's going on? What?

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In the Hands of the Prophets! After about half a season of ignoring the issue, we're finally getting to see the ramifications of Kai Opaka disappearing. But who would've thought that a religious political structure could lead to such strife?! And Vedek Winn. Yech. Also, the hosts talk about their favorite episodes and their favorite characters of the show so far!

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Timescape! Boy, the Enterprise sure goes through a lot of timey-wimey stuff, don't they? But what if it was also a time... mystery?! Yeah, that's right, we in there.  

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CONTENT WARNING: There are detailed discussions of war crimes, including r*pe, forced labor, and g**ocide.

Duet! Well, we're finally here. DS9 finally dives into some of the heaviest subject matter of the series, specifically all those war crimes Cardassians committed during their occupation of Bajor. Many fans call this one of the best if not the best episode of the entire series, which is high praise given that we're still in s...

Dramatis Personae! Remember "Lonely Among Us" from TNG? Well, what if that happened to DS9, except it happened to all of the main cast except Odo? That's this episode. Yup.  

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Second Chances! The episode that definitively proves that the transporter is just a cloning machine. Don't @ us about this, you can't change the facts with all your nerd science, there's literally two Rikers. Anyway, Deanna wants to bone the other Riker, and the other Riker is really made at the other Riker. Also Picard REALLY needs this database for some reason, surely it doesn't contain incriminating evidence. 

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Ask a Trek Expert with Sandy Holland! Last April Fool's, we reviewed "Star Trek: The Next Generation - A XXX Parody" at the behest of fans, and it ended up being a surprisingly good watch! A little over a year later, the editor of that parody, Sandy Holland, reached out to us, and we couldn't pass up an interview with her! Spoilers: there's a lot of shop talk about the industry, XXX and otherwise, but you might be surprised by some...

The Forsaken! Who knew that the best part of this episode would be Lwaxana?! Well, I guess it's partially because Odo was with her the whole time, but she was also a genuinely good character this episode. Also, I guess there were some other prissy ambassadors that Julian had to babysit. And I guess some sort of... computer... baby? C'mon guys, what're we doing here 

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Ask a Trek Expert with Brent Black! We're kicking off a new kind of podcast episode with Brent Black a.k.a. Brentalfloss! Not only does he answer some of our most burning questions about TOS, he's also composed "Khan!!! The Musical!" A Parody TREK-Tacular! Care to take a guess as to what it's about?! 

Check out "Khan!!! The Musical!" here: https://khanthemusical.com/ 

Highlight reel: https://youtu.be/0uF4EOJXwjw?si=tZrV8_iTuWU1iY...

Rightful Heir! Worf starts to have a crisis of faith about his religion that he's never really cared about before. What are the odds that he'll find the Klingon Jesus, like, right away? This one lead to a bunch of deep dives into religious talk and whatnot, which is par for an episode where Worf meets Klingon Jesus.

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Safe House! During the dark period after TNG ended but before the X-Men movies, Patrick Stewart was adrift doing random middling projects. One of these was Safe House. Marvin remembered this movie being a lot funnier than it actually was. But hey, at least we got to see Sir Pat Stew's dong. 

Where you can find Patrick Stewart's full frontal: https://youtu.be/N0tUmrI-rB8?si=gsEQcnIbQUl0ZDwb&t=3774 

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If Wishes Were Horses! What if Rumplestiltskin came to life? What if an old-timey yet still from the future baseball player came to life? What if sexy Jadzia Dax came to life? What if a big space butthole came to life? What if the TNG episode Where No One Has Gone Before came to life but without that pervy Traveler? Well, if these were your wishes, they are horses now. 

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Suspicions! For some reason, Beverly puts together a small conference about starship shield engineering? Uh, and then the experiment goes awry and gets someone killed? And then the original inventor of the new shield dies? Man, what a mess, surely she won't do anything that'll make her look crazier and get her in more trouble.

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Progress! Kira needs to get an old man to leave his farm so they can frack their moon! Also, Nog and Jake turn trade up a proverbial paperclip into a proverbial house! Is this Progress?!

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Frame of Mind! How many times has Riker been kidnapped during an undercover mission and made to feel crazy this series? It's been twice, but that's still a lot. Damn, Riker, back at it again.

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The Storyteller! Miles O'Brien is co-opted into a very specific Bajoran local ceremony where he has to fight the smoke monster from Lost! Jake and Nog become friends with a teenage Bajoran girl who has to figure out diplomatic relations for her little Bajoran village! Captain Gym Kata of the USS Kumite has to fight off a bunch of cultists on a dangerous alien planet, but he's able to fight them off through the use of a pommel horse...

The Chase! Ever wonder why all the aliens in Star Trek are just humans with stuff on their face? Well, so did the TNG writers, and here's their answer! Will it lead to a profound ending where we all learn to come together and be friends? No. Will we unintentionally avoid all references to Red Letter Media jokes about the kurlan naiskos? Surprisingly, yes!

Check out "Starship Tempest: A Star Trek Adventures Podcast" at https://www...

Battle Lines! Full disclosure: Ricardo was quite sick during this recording, so he's even loopier than usual. But hey, we got Mike from Breaking Bad, we got fight scenes, we got nanomachines, we got the Bajoran Pope, what could go wrong?!

Check out "Starship Tempest  A Star Trek Adventures Podcast" at https://www.StarshipTempest.com or whereever you get your podcasts! 

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Vortex! We survived the vortex of the California fires to present you the Vortex of DS9! Y'know, the one where Odo gets knocked out by rocks. Also, I guess he gets more info about his loser family or relatives or whatever. Will we finally find out where Odo comes from in this episode? The answer, of course, is no, but hey, at least we had fun along the way. Right? Right?!

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