June 28, 2025 • 16 mins
When frustration rises, can it lead to something greater? In this heartfelt episode, Kevin and Alan explore how the moments that test us can spark the clearest vision. A crowded gym becomes the catalyst for a new dream, and a conversation unfolds around self-belief, control, and the quiet power of pivoting with purpose. Through real stories and raw truths, they show how clarity often comes not in ease, but in resistance.
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Show notes:
(2:11) Frustration as fuel for change
(4:26) The home gym decision
(6:43) The Delta Force mindset
(8:34) Level up with NLU: Join our free virtual Monthly Meet-up event every first Thursday for powerful insights, real tools, and unstoppable growth. https://us06web.zoom.us/meeting/register/K_0bBGWuTfKcnTh5B0pvBg#/registration
(12:23) Creating the future you want
(14:35) The truth about manifestation
(15:21) Outro
Send a text to Kevin and Alan!
🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Kevin Palmieri (00:00):
My biggest bottleneck in the beginning of
this journey was lack ofawareness.
I've always been pretty quickto pivot.
I've always been pretty quickto take action.
My issue was that I just didn'tknow what to do.
So if you're somebody who knowsexactly what to do and you
struggle with pivoting today'sepisode- is for you.
Alan Lazaros (00:19):
Frustration turns into fascination.
Fascination turns intoinnovation, turns into
fascination, fascination turnsinto innovation.
I actually think the thingsthat bother you are obstacles in
the way of your goals, and Ithink they can motivate you if
you use it right.
Kevin Palmieri (00:32):
Welcome to Next Level University.
I'm your host, kevin Palmieri,and I'm your co-host, alan
Lazarus.
At NLU, we believe in aheart-driven but no BS approach
to holistic self-improvement fordream chasers.
Alan Lazaros (00:47):
Our goal with every episode is to help you
level up your life love healthand wealth.
Kevin Palmieri (00:53):
We bring you a new episode every single day on
topics like confidence,self-belief, self-worth,
self-awareness, relationships,boundaries, consistency, habits
and defining your own uniqueversion of success
Self-improvement in your pocketevery day, from anywhere,
(01:14):
completely free.
Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation today for
episode number 2,112.
Saturday if you're listening tothis on the weekend, how
quickly do you pivot?
This is going to be a 10 minuteepisode.
Okay, we say that and thenusually it goes longer, but our
(01:35):
goal for this is a 10 minuteepisode.
Alan has a podcast he's on.
Do not interrupt me, becauseevery minute here is valuable
like diamonds.
You had a story, what is it?
Alan Lazaros (01:47):
what I was gonna say.
Yes is it's saturday.
That means book club is at 1230 pm eastern standard time.
The link will be in the shownotes to register join us
willpower strong work.
Kevin Palmieri (01:56):
All right, now we have nine minutes, got it all
right, I was in the gym earlier.
Alan Lazaros (02:00):
Most of our stories are gym related.
Again going back to theprevious previous episode.
Kevin Palmieri (02:05):
when you have a priority, almost everything
revolves around the priority, sothat becomes the most focused
on thing got to.
Alan Lazaros (02:11):
Fitness.
Finance and family are my threepriorities right now.
Coaching, training, podcastingit's all good, okay, priorities
within priorities.
It's another episode sometime,wow, all right.
The story is this I was in thegym earlier and because we have
the heat wave thing going on, Ithink a lot more people are in
the gym than typical.
Emilia and I had skipped twodays, so we we walked outside in
(02:35):
the heat in the evening becausewe've been overwhelmed for our
exercise instead of going to thegym.
We try to weight train everyother day.
We were in the gym this morningand it was an absolute S show.
It was the worst I've ever seenit.
I mean, it's a small-ish gymand there were, I don't know,
(02:55):
maybe 30, 40, 50 people there.
It was a lot.
It was a lot, probably 30.
And you just, you just couldn'tget any stuff.
You couldn't get space.
It was.
It was brutal and I was sofrustrated.
It was so frustrating becausewe only have 45 minutes.
I was obviously behind.
I texted you earlier and I gotin the car and so did Amelia and
(03:17):
we looked at each other and wewent.
That was a shit show.
And then I had a moment and Iwas like it's a gym that's two
minutes out of the way.
So in my head I immediately goto brainstorming.
I go from annoyed andfrustrated to immediately
brainstorming.
So frustration, I think, is theyour mind, body, heart and soul
(03:38):
saying hey, there's somethingin the way of your goals.
That's what frustration is.
When you get frustrated withyour intimate partner or your
friend or your family, you'refrustrated because there's a
goal or a core value beinginfringed upon.
When you have huge goals,expect your life to be
frustrating.
Seriously, kevin's frustratedwith my audio quality right now.
He's annoyed because he has agoal.
(04:00):
If you didn't have a goal to bea world-class podcaster, that
wouldn't bother you.
It's fair.
That's why I think that's thebase reason people don't have
goals.
The moment you set goals is themoment most things frustrate
you because all of a sudden,there's a thousand obstacles in
your fucking way.
So one of the obstacles in theway of my dreams and my dream
physique is this gym that isvery, very difficult to work out
(04:20):
in because there's so manyfreaking people in it and it's
too small.
So I have a couple options.
So frustration into fascination.
Okay, let's brainstorm.
Alan, we can either go to adifferent gym, which the next
closest is probably 15 minutesaway, maybe 10, probably 10.
Okay, I don't want to do that.
It's two minutes out of the way.
It's going to waste more time.
Okay, and I was like you knowwhat.
(04:41):
I turned to Amelia.
I said this is just going tomotivate me.
I'm going to go work harderBoth of us.
Let's go work harder, let'sgrow our businesses and let's
buy a home gym.
And she said, yep, and that wasit.
That was the end of theconversation and both of us had
a fire in our belly.
From that moment, we will go dothat.
It's just going to happen Now.
It's not going to happentomorrow.
(05:01):
We're not going to buy a homegym tomorrow, but within two
years you will see a decked outhome gym.
She already has the capital todo that and I'm going to also
work on that, and we do too.
But I also need other things,not just a home gym for me.
Yeah, you get a home gym.
Kevin Palmieri (05:18):
What do I get?
A Ferrari, a T-Rex, a llama anew car, I guess, so I already
used up my home gym fund?
Alan Lazaros (05:24):
unfortunately no, but the point is, at the end of
the day, you do have morecontrol over your future.
You don't have a lot of controlover the present.
Sometimes there's nothing I cando.
Like the gym was so fuckingcrowded, what am I going to do?
There's nothing I can do.
So okay, and this is my traumaresponse, straight up aim higher
(05:46):
, work harder, get smarter thereis other stuff you could do
that you could go to differenttime.
Kevin Palmieri (05:51):
Well, I mean, there is other stuff.
Now is it aligned?
I don't, that's different yeah,exactly that's different.
Alan Lazaros (05:56):
I'm actually been enjoying the mornings.
I used to be the eveningfitness guy for years and I've
been enjoying the mornings.
I used to be the eveningfitness guy for years and I've
been enjoying the morningsbecause my willpower is higher.
Shout out to Willpower the bookin book club.
But I actually and I want yourtake on this Kev, because I know
we got to go here I am so quickto go from and she is too dude.
(06:17):
You should see it.
It's awesome.
She goes from pissed off topositive change quicker than any
human I've ever seen.
It's insane.
We, we immediately brainstormabout what we're going to do
differently and then it's donethe other day.
She's like in the future, whenyou go upstairs, can you bring
my phone down too, because wehave a chart our chargers
upstairs I said yep, and thenthe day after I forgot to do it,
(06:40):
she's like hey, and then I waslike, boom, did it.
Now it's done, I do it everymorning.
But we, we are very big on thatand we use the analogy of delta
force and we looked this up onchat gpt only 300 out of 1.3
million people in the usmilitary are delta force, so
it's 0.023 300.
(07:00):
What a cool metaphor.
The spartan 300 and I, for myclients out there, I'm I'm
definitely using that metaphorlike if you want to work with me
, you basically are willing tobe elite and hear the hardest
truths in the world genuinely,and don't work with me if you
aren't in a good mental healthspace.
But we think of ourselves likethat genuinely.
(07:24):
We've been watching a lot ofmilitary films.
Like we, we have a verymilitary mindset about
everything.
I mean, we don't fuck aroundwith anything ever and and we do
we're playful in in certainthings, but for the most part,
when we get up, it's game time,like if we don't leave here an
hour and a half before our firstsession, before we go to bed,
we always say what, what's yourfirst session?
I said 10, I said 1030.
(07:46):
I thought it was 1030.
That's why I had to text youyeah.
So what's your take on this?
Because, ultimately, I've neverseen anyone go faster from
frustrated to brainstorming, topositive change than Emilia
Smith, and this is somethingthat I do think is a cheat code.
I just don't know I think it's.
Kevin Palmieri (08:02):
I think it's directly connected to
self-belief, as always, your,your belief in your ability to
control a situation, I think, isdirectly connected to your
level of self-belief.
So I think that's why ithappens so quickly, or somebody
else they might not thinkthey're capable of, because
right there it requires thebelief to think that you can
(08:23):
make enough money to afford ahome gym in the next two years,
hypothetically if we're sayingtwo years, that right there the
exact amount.
That's a.
That's not something that manypeople do nlu listener what is
happening.
Alan Lazaros (08:37):
I just wanted to jump in here and let you know if
you want to get to the nextlevel faster.
We have a free virtual monthlymeetup at the first Thursday of
every month.
You can connect withlike-minded people and become a
bigger part of this amazingglobal community.
The link to register will be inthe show notes.
I know how much money we make.
I know how much money she makes.
(08:58):
I know how much money she has.
I know how much money I I have.
I know how much a home gym willcost.
I know exactly what we're goingto do.
I know where we're going tolive.
I know the price of homes inthose areas I know square
footage, I know the mortgage andthe taxes.
I I in my head it actually ayear and a half max.
Kevin Palmieri (09:13):
Yeah, that's just not common.
So it I'm, I'm, convinced it'sagain.
I say this with many thingsit's directly connected to
self-belief.
The more self-belief I've beenable to cultivate over the years
, the faster I am to pivot aswell, and it almost makes the
present not matter as much.
Yeah, it's going to suck forthe next year, but it's not that
(09:34):
big of a deal.
But I also understand how rarethat is and how that doesn't
necessarily land with otherpeople what was it?
Alan Lazaros (09:43):
what is it like to not have?
Like, self-efficacy is whatwe're talking about.
Your, your ability to just sayokay, I'm just going to change
this then you feel out ofcontrol you feel out of control.
Kevin Palmieri (09:55):
Bitch and moan and feel bad, make excuse.
Depends.
It depends on.
For me, there are certainthings that I always felt like
pretty in control of, like thegym was always whatever.
I'll just find another gym orI'll go to a different time,
whatever, I don't care aboutthat.
That never really affected methat much.
But yeah, you just feel out ofcontrol and then, whatever your
trauma response to feeling outof control is, make excuses.
(10:16):
Think you're not good enough,think you're not smart enough.
Blame the world, blame otherpeople, blame this, blame that,
that I think that get matt.
Alan Lazaros (10:25):
Villainize other people that leads to even less
self-belief it's, it's oh.
Kevin Palmieri (10:31):
What the why the fuck are all these people here
at nine o'clock?
I don't, don't any of you havejobs.
It's like, well, you're theretoo, though like you have a job,
so they, maybe they have aweird job that or I didn't go to
that at all, no, no, or well,this person's not even in shape,
like, why are they using themachine?
It's like, well, that's how youget in shape.
That, I think it's just.
It's so easy to blame.
It's so easy to blame otherpeople than to take ownership.
(10:55):
And I think you canconstructively take ownership to
the level of self-belief youhave, because you can't really
change what you don't own, butyou can't really own what you.
It's really hard to own whatyou can't change.
That, yeah for sure.
It becomes a.
I think it's just a cycle.
I think that's why self-beliefand self-efficacy is such an
important thing and afundamental of what we talk
(11:16):
about so much, because I thinkit dictates almost everything I
do.
Alan Lazaros (11:19):
Yeah, agreed, do you?
You used to have lowerself-efficacy and now it's much
higher, and to the point whereyou've actually playfully said I
think I sound delusional toother people.
100%, definitely, okay, explainthe difference, man.
Kevin Palmieri (11:36):
It's almost like you know you can predict the
future because you're creatingthe future and you're just
certain that you can create it.
Like I told, taryn is likethere's not gonna be any travel
this year.
I mean no travel, travel, we'renot gonna travel.
But next year it'll becompletely different.
Like just give me a year.
I understand how fucking crazythat sounds.
Just give me a year.
That sounds crazy.
Well, here's a long time ayear's a long.
(11:58):
Not, I know, but it is it, Iknow it's.
It's really not, but it alsokind of is, depending on when
you zoom out, it's not a lot of,not a long time yeah, but when
you think about doing the samething every day for the next 365
days, it's like oh yeah, thatis fair, that's fair, that's
fair.
So between now and your nextbirthday, we're just gonna do
the same shit every day.
(12:19):
Just give me, just give me that.
That's all I need, that's it,and then things will be
different.
Alan Lazaros (12:23):
That's it.
Things will be different.
Kevin Palmieri (12:24):
I know, I know Things will be different.
I know, I know It'll be great,way better, way better.
But I understand, because Iused to hear you say that.
It's like, dude, it's not justgive me a year, year's, a long
fucking time.
Now I say the same thing, so Iunderstand what it's like to be
on both sides of the coin, ohman.
Alan Lazaros (12:39):
Yeah, no-transcript.
(13:13):
Okay, well, go into the future10 years and tell me what you're
going to be pissed off atyourself now for and Emilia
later on that night.
She's like 10 years, alan.
She got stuck in shame themoment you said that and I was
like, oh my bad.
I have a client who told merecently I said go out a week.
(13:34):
She said yeah, go out two weeks.
She said yeah.
I said go out a month.
She said it's blurry.
I said go out two months.
She said it's blurry andthere's shame.
She said you want to know whatcame up for me, this photo of me
at my worst.
And she showed me the photo.
It's like are you fuckingkidding me?
Oh my God, dude, when I thinkabout my future, there's nothing
(13:55):
but excitement.
I'm so fucking excited.
Well, because you feel incontrol.
Same.
But here's what I want to sharewith everyone you can build
that.
I'm certain the neuroscienceshows that you can build that.
And willpower book club likecome to book club.
You can build it.
You can build the executivefunction that only dolphins and
primates have of going into yourfuture.
You can like Kev is now like yo, give me a year.
(14:17):
You can build.
You can build a lot more thanyou realize Seriously, but it's
going to take fucking work andlike you can't just oh, home gym
tomorrow, like that's not howit works right.
So that whole manifestationthing is such bullshit.
100%, yeah, 100%.
Kevin Palmieri (14:35):
I want to do an episode at some point on, like
what are the top five things weused to believe that we now know
we just don't anymore?
Manifestation is one of them.
For sure for me, nice, theuniverse doesn't care.
Doesn one of them?
For sure, for me, nice, theuniverse doesn't care, doesn't
care, it doesn't, it doesn't.
Bigger thing, hey, it doesn'tcare, doesn't care about you?
(14:55):
Oh, it must.
The universe aspires to alignwith everything you want.
No, no, it doesn't, no, no, no,no, no.
But it does feel good tobelieve that, it does feel good
to believe that.
But yeah, no, it's got othershit to focus on, like keeping
everything spinning and likegravity and shit.
Alan Lazaros (15:04):
But you know, I really want to fucking bmw.
Kevin Palmieri (15:07):
Irrelevant to your feelings, I'll tell you all
right, we're gonna go so, uh,you're on time ish to your next
call book club today at 12 30eastern time.
If you're listening to thisepisode, on saturday next, all
the nation will have the link inthe show notes below.
As always, we love you, weappreciate you, grateful for
each and every one of you, andat nlu we don, we donate to fans
, we have family.
We'll talk to you all tomorrow.
Alan Lazaros (15:27):
Keep it Next Level , next Level Nation.
Kevin Palmieri (15:31):
Thanks for joining us for another episode
of Next Level University.
We love connecting with theNext Level family.
Alan Lazaros (15:38):
We mean it when we say family.
If you ever need anything,please reach out to us directly.
Everything you need to get ahold of us is in the show notes.
Kevin Palmieri (15:47):
Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow
.
My biggest bottleneck in the beginning of
this journey was lack ofawareness.
I've always been pretty quickto pivot.
I've always been pretty quickto take action.
My issue was that I just didn'tknow what to do.
So if you're somebody who knowsexactly what to do and you
struggle with pivoting today'sepisode- is for you.
Alan Lazaros (00:19):
Frustration turns into fascination.
Fascination turns intoinnovation, turns into
fascination, fascination turnsinto innovation.
I actually think the thingsthat bother you are obstacles in
the way of your goals, and Ithink they can motivate you if
you use it right.
Kevin Palmieri (00:32):
Welcome to Next Level University.
I'm your host, kevin Palmieri,and I'm your co-host, alan
Lazarus.
At NLU, we believe in aheart-driven but no BS approach
to holistic self-improvement fordream chasers.
Alan Lazaros (00:47):
Our goal with every episode is to help you
level up your life love healthand wealth.
Kevin Palmieri (00:53):
We bring you a new episode every single day on
topics like confidence,self-belief, self-worth,
self-awareness, relationships,boundaries, consistency, habits
and defining your own uniqueversion of success
Self-improvement in your pocketevery day, from anywhere,
(01:14):
completely free.
Welcome to Next Level University, next Level Nation today for
episode number 2,112.
Saturday if you're listening tothis on the weekend, how
quickly do you pivot?
This is going to be a 10 minuteepisode.
Okay, we say that and thenusually it goes longer, but our
(01:35):
goal for this is a 10 minuteepisode.
Alan has a podcast he's on.
Do not interrupt me, becauseevery minute here is valuable
like diamonds.
You had a story, what is it?
Alan Lazaros (01:47):
what I was gonna say.
Yes is it's saturday.
That means book club is at 1230 pm eastern standard time.
The link will be in the shownotes to register join us
willpower strong work.
Kevin Palmieri (01:56):
All right, now we have nine minutes, got it all
right, I was in the gym earlier.
Alan Lazaros (02:00):
Most of our stories are gym related.
Again going back to theprevious previous episode.
Kevin Palmieri (02:05):
when you have a priority, almost everything
revolves around the priority, sothat becomes the most focused
on thing got to.
Alan Lazaros (02:11):
Fitness.
Finance and family are my threepriorities right now.
Coaching, training, podcastingit's all good, okay, priorities
within priorities.
It's another episode sometime,wow, all right.
The story is this I was in thegym earlier and because we have
the heat wave thing going on, Ithink a lot more people are in
the gym than typical.
Emilia and I had skipped twodays, so we we walked outside in
(02:35):
the heat in the evening becausewe've been overwhelmed for our
exercise instead of going to thegym.
We try to weight train everyother day.
We were in the gym this morningand it was an absolute S show.
It was the worst I've ever seenit.
I mean, it's a small-ish gymand there were, I don't know,
(02:55):
maybe 30, 40, 50 people there.
It was a lot.
It was a lot, probably 30.
And you just, you just couldn'tget any stuff.
You couldn't get space.
It was.
It was brutal and I was sofrustrated.
It was so frustrating becausewe only have 45 minutes.
I was obviously behind.
I texted you earlier and I gotin the car and so did Amelia and
(03:17):
we looked at each other and wewent.
That was a shit show.
And then I had a moment and Iwas like it's a gym that's two
minutes out of the way.
So in my head I immediately goto brainstorming.
I go from annoyed andfrustrated to immediately
brainstorming.
So frustration, I think, is theyour mind, body, heart and soul
(03:38):
saying hey, there's somethingin the way of your goals.
That's what frustration is.
When you get frustrated withyour intimate partner or your
friend or your family, you'refrustrated because there's a
goal or a core value beinginfringed upon.
When you have huge goals,expect your life to be
frustrating.
Seriously, kevin's frustratedwith my audio quality right now.
He's annoyed because he has agoal.
(04:00):
If you didn't have a goal to bea world-class podcaster, that
wouldn't bother you.
It's fair.
That's why I think that's thebase reason people don't have
goals.
The moment you set goals is themoment most things frustrate
you because all of a sudden,there's a thousand obstacles in
your fucking way.
So one of the obstacles in theway of my dreams and my dream
physique is this gym that isvery, very difficult to work out
(04:20):
in because there's so manyfreaking people in it and it's
too small.
So I have a couple options.
So frustration into fascination.
Okay, let's brainstorm.
Alan, we can either go to adifferent gym, which the next
closest is probably 15 minutesaway, maybe 10, probably 10.
Okay, I don't want to do that.
It's two minutes out of the way.
It's going to waste more time.
Okay, and I was like you knowwhat.
(04:41):
I turned to Amelia.
I said this is just going tomotivate me.
I'm going to go work harderBoth of us.
Let's go work harder, let'sgrow our businesses and let's
buy a home gym.
And she said, yep, and that wasit.
That was the end of theconversation and both of us had
a fire in our belly.
From that moment, we will go dothat.
It's just going to happen Now.
It's not going to happentomorrow.
(05:01):
We're not going to buy a homegym tomorrow, but within two
years you will see a decked outhome gym.
She already has the capital todo that and I'm going to also
work on that, and we do too.
But I also need other things,not just a home gym for me.
Yeah, you get a home gym.
Kevin Palmieri (05:18):
What do I get?
A Ferrari, a T-Rex, a llama anew car, I guess, so I already
used up my home gym fund?
Alan Lazaros (05:24):
unfortunately no, but the point is, at the end of
the day, you do have morecontrol over your future.
You don't have a lot of controlover the present.
Sometimes there's nothing I cando.
Like the gym was so fuckingcrowded, what am I going to do?
There's nothing I can do.
So okay, and this is my traumaresponse, straight up aim higher
(05:46):
, work harder, get smarter thereis other stuff you could do
that you could go to differenttime.
Kevin Palmieri (05:51):
Well, I mean, there is other stuff.
Now is it aligned?
I don't, that's different yeah,exactly that's different.
Alan Lazaros (05:56):
I'm actually been enjoying the mornings.
I used to be the eveningfitness guy for years and I've
been enjoying the mornings.
I used to be the eveningfitness guy for years and I've
been enjoying the morningsbecause my willpower is higher.
Shout out to Willpower the bookin book club.
But I actually and I want yourtake on this Kev, because I know
we got to go here I am so quickto go from and she is too dude.
(06:17):
You should see it.
It's awesome.
She goes from pissed off topositive change quicker than any
human I've ever seen.
It's insane.
We, we immediately brainstormabout what we're going to do
differently and then it's donethe other day.
She's like in the future, whenyou go upstairs, can you bring
my phone down too, because wehave a chart our chargers
upstairs I said yep, and thenthe day after I forgot to do it,
(06:40):
she's like hey, and then I waslike, boom, did it.
Now it's done, I do it everymorning.
But we, we are very big on thatand we use the analogy of delta
force and we looked this up onchat gpt only 300 out of 1.3
million people in the usmilitary are delta force, so
it's 0.023 300.
(07:00):
What a cool metaphor.
The spartan 300 and I, for myclients out there, I'm I'm
definitely using that metaphorlike if you want to work with me
, you basically are willing tobe elite and hear the hardest
truths in the world genuinely,and don't work with me if you
aren't in a good mental healthspace.
But we think of ourselves likethat genuinely.
(07:24):
We've been watching a lot ofmilitary films.
Like we, we have a verymilitary mindset about
everything.
I mean, we don't fuck aroundwith anything ever and and we do
we're playful in in certainthings, but for the most part,
when we get up, it's game time,like if we don't leave here an
hour and a half before our firstsession, before we go to bed,
we always say what, what's yourfirst session?
I said 10, I said 1030.
(07:46):
I thought it was 1030.
That's why I had to text youyeah.
So what's your take on this?
Because, ultimately, I've neverseen anyone go faster from
frustrated to brainstorming, topositive change than Emilia
Smith, and this is somethingthat I do think is a cheat code.
I just don't know I think it's.
Kevin Palmieri (08:02):
I think it's directly connected to
self-belief, as always, your,your belief in your ability to
control a situation, I think, isdirectly connected to your
level of self-belief.
So I think that's why ithappens so quickly, or somebody
else they might not thinkthey're capable of, because
right there it requires thebelief to think that you can
(08:23):
make enough money to afford ahome gym in the next two years,
hypothetically if we're sayingtwo years, that right there the
exact amount.
That's a.
That's not something that manypeople do nlu listener what is
happening.
Alan Lazaros (08:37):
I just wanted to jump in here and let you know if
you want to get to the nextlevel faster.
We have a free virtual monthlymeetup at the first Thursday of
every month.
You can connect withlike-minded people and become a
bigger part of this amazingglobal community.
The link to register will be inthe show notes.
I know how much money we make.
I know how much money she makes.
(08:58):
I know how much money she has.
I know how much money I I have.
I know how much a home gym willcost.
I know exactly what we're goingto do.
I know where we're going tolive.
I know the price of homes inthose areas I know square
footage, I know the mortgage andthe taxes.
I I in my head it actually ayear and a half max.
Kevin Palmieri (09:13):
Yeah, that's just not common.
So it I'm, I'm, convinced it'sagain.
I say this with many thingsit's directly connected to
self-belief.
The more self-belief I've beenable to cultivate over the years
, the faster I am to pivot aswell, and it almost makes the
present not matter as much.
Yeah, it's going to suck forthe next year, but it's not that
(09:34):
big of a deal.
But I also understand how rarethat is and how that doesn't
necessarily land with otherpeople what was it?
Alan Lazaros (09:43):
what is it like to not have?
Like, self-efficacy is whatwe're talking about.
Your, your ability to just sayokay, I'm just going to change
this then you feel out ofcontrol you feel out of control.
Kevin Palmieri (09:55):
Bitch and moan and feel bad, make excuse.
Depends.
It depends on.
For me, there are certainthings that I always felt like
pretty in control of, like thegym was always whatever.
I'll just find another gym orI'll go to a different time,
whatever, I don't care aboutthat.
That never really affected methat much.
But yeah, you just feel out ofcontrol and then, whatever your
trauma response to feeling outof control is, make excuses.
(10:16):
Think you're not good enough,think you're not smart enough.
Blame the world, blame otherpeople, blame this, blame that,
that I think that get matt.
Alan Lazaros (10:25):
Villainize other people that leads to even less
self-belief it's, it's oh.
Kevin Palmieri (10:31):
What the why the fuck are all these people here
at nine o'clock?
I don't, don't any of you havejobs.
It's like, well, you're theretoo, though like you have a job,
so they, maybe they have aweird job that or I didn't go to
that at all, no, no, or well,this person's not even in shape,
like, why are they using themachine?
It's like, well, that's how youget in shape.
That, I think it's just.
It's so easy to blame.
It's so easy to blame otherpeople than to take ownership.
(10:55):
And I think you canconstructively take ownership to
the level of self-belief youhave, because you can't really
change what you don't own, butyou can't really own what you.
It's really hard to own whatyou can't change.
That, yeah for sure.
It becomes a.
I think it's just a cycle.
I think that's why self-beliefand self-efficacy is such an
important thing and afundamental of what we talk
(11:16):
about so much, because I thinkit dictates almost everything I
do.
Alan Lazaros (11:19):
Yeah, agreed, do you?
You used to have lowerself-efficacy and now it's much
higher, and to the point whereyou've actually playfully said I
think I sound delusional toother people.
100%, definitely, okay, explainthe difference, man.
Kevin Palmieri (11:36):
It's almost like you know you can predict the
future because you're creatingthe future and you're just
certain that you can create it.
Like I told, taryn is likethere's not gonna be any travel
this year.
I mean no travel, travel, we'renot gonna travel.
But next year it'll becompletely different.
Like just give me a year.
I understand how fucking crazythat sounds.
Just give me a year.
That sounds crazy.
Well, here's a long time ayear's a long.
(11:58):
Not, I know, but it is it, Iknow it's.
It's really not, but it alsokind of is, depending on when
you zoom out, it's not a lot of,not a long time yeah, but when
you think about doing the samething every day for the next 365
days, it's like oh yeah, thatis fair, that's fair, that's
fair.
So between now and your nextbirthday, we're just gonna do
the same shit every day.
(12:19):
Just give me, just give me that.
That's all I need, that's it,and then things will be
different.
Alan Lazaros (12:23):
That's it.
Things will be different.
Kevin Palmieri (12:24):
I know, I know Things will be different.
I know, I know It'll be great,way better, way better.
But I understand, because Iused to hear you say that.
It's like, dude, it's not justgive me a year, year's, a long
fucking time.
Now I say the same thing, so Iunderstand what it's like to be
on both sides of the coin, ohman.
Alan Lazaros (12:39):
Yeah, no-transcript.
(13:13):
Okay, well, go into the future10 years and tell me what you're
going to be pissed off atyourself now for and Emilia
later on that night.
She's like 10 years, alan.
She got stuck in shame themoment you said that and I was
like, oh my bad.
I have a client who told merecently I said go out a week.
(13:34):
She said yeah, go out two weeks.
She said yeah.
I said go out a month.
She said it's blurry.
I said go out two months.
She said it's blurry andthere's shame.
She said you want to know whatcame up for me, this photo of me
at my worst.
And she showed me the photo.
It's like are you fuckingkidding me?
Oh my God, dude, when I thinkabout my future, there's nothing
(13:55):
but excitement.
I'm so fucking excited.
Well, because you feel incontrol.
Same.
But here's what I want to sharewith everyone you can build
that.
I'm certain the neuroscienceshows that you can build that.
And willpower book club likecome to book club.
You can build it.
You can build the executivefunction that only dolphins and
primates have of going into yourfuture.
You can like Kev is now like yo, give me a year.
(14:17):
You can build.
You can build a lot more thanyou realize Seriously, but it's
going to take fucking work andlike you can't just oh, home gym
tomorrow, like that's not howit works right.
So that whole manifestationthing is such bullshit.
100%, yeah, 100%.
Kevin Palmieri (14:35):
I want to do an episode at some point on, like
what are the top five things weused to believe that we now know
we just don't anymore?
Manifestation is one of them.
For sure for me, nice, theuniverse doesn't care.
Doesn one of them?
For sure, for me, nice, theuniverse doesn't care, doesn't
care, it doesn't, it doesn't.
Bigger thing, hey, it doesn'tcare, doesn't care about you?
(14:55):
Oh, it must.
The universe aspires to alignwith everything you want.
No, no, it doesn't, no, no, no,no, no.
But it does feel good tobelieve that, it does feel good
to believe that.
But yeah, no, it's got othershit to focus on, like keeping
everything spinning and likegravity and shit.
Alan Lazaros (15:04):
But you know, I really want to fucking bmw.
Kevin Palmieri (15:07):
Irrelevant to your feelings, I'll tell you all
right, we're gonna go so, uh,you're on time ish to your next
call book club today at 12 30eastern time.
If you're listening to thisepisode, on saturday next, all
the nation will have the link inthe show notes below.
As always, we love you, weappreciate you, grateful for
each and every one of you, andat nlu we don, we donate to fans
, we have family.
We'll talk to you all tomorrow.
Alan Lazaros (15:27):
Keep it Next Level , next Level Nation.
Kevin Palmieri (15:31):
Thanks for joining us for another episode
of Next Level University.
We love connecting with theNext Level family.
Alan Lazaros (15:38):
We mean it when we say family.
If you ever need anything,please reach out to us directly.
Everything you need to get ahold of us is in the show notes.
Kevin Palmieri (15:47):
Thank you again and we will talk to you tomorrow
.
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