September 16, 2025 • 37 mins
What does a veteran police officer with 15 years of experience know about raising kids in the digital age? Doug Greene brings a unique perspective to parenting that blends his professional training with his faith. Rather than focus solely on technical safeguards, Officer Greene prioritizes developing spiritual discernment in his children, and perhaps most fascinating is how he applies police de-escalation techniques to parenting teenagers.
KEEPING KIDS SAFE ONLINE
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Next Talk podcast.
We are a nonprofit passionateabout keeping kids safe online.
We're learning together how tonavigate tech, culture and faith
with our kids.
I am here with Doug Green today.
He is a Christian, a husband, adad and a police officer of 15
(00:25):
years.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Doug welcome to the show.
Tell us a little bit more aboutyourself.
I know I gave a lot of the bigthings right there.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Well, thank you, mandy.
It's such an honor to be on theshow.
Thank you for the invite to beon the show.
Thank you for the invite, mandy.
You're not just my friend, youare my sister, you are very
(00:57):
close to my wife, and yourmission, your kingdom calling,
has had a direct impact on ourfamily, and so I want to thank
you for your submission, yourobedience, and I also know that
that comes with some weight tocarry and it takes work and
stress, but you know why you'rehere on this planet, and so I'm
just.
It's always good to be inconversation with good people
(01:18):
who have passion, and that's whyI feel God led me into the
world of policing.
And you know, ever since I wasa little boy Mandy again, it's
all God when I look back on itbut whenever I saw a police car
or a police officer, I stoppedeverything that I was doing If I
(01:39):
was playing ball or, you know,hanging out with family.
If I saw a police, I stoppedand I just stared at them and it
was like the police car wasmoving in slow motion, the
police officer was walking inslow motion.
They were like superheroes tome, like Superman standing on
(02:01):
top of the Empire State Buildingand his cape is flapping in the
wind so slowly.
And I knew that there'ssomething special about these
human beings who make the freewill decision to go to the
danger and not away from it.
And I recognized that at anearly age and it captured my
(02:25):
heart, it captured my attention,but, I would be honest, I
didn't think that I was going tobecome a police officer.
And as the years went by and Ilater found out that my great
grandmother was the eighthAfrican-American female officer
that the Los Angeles PoliceDepartment had hired, I was like
(02:45):
wow, it's in the blood.
And I learned a little bitabout her passion.
I never got the opportunity tomeet her, but I learned about
her passion for the youth andfor serving people.
And it wasn't until I was 29years old and the good Lord said
are you ready?
And I knew, with that question,that that was, that was a
(03:08):
statement.
It's time to step into theministry of policing.
And when there was a lot of alot was within that question.
Mandy is Doug, are you willingto lay your life on the line for
complete strangers?
Are you ready to go towards thedanger and not away from it?
(03:28):
And, mandy, it was an absoluteto this day.
Yes, within my soul, yes, Irecognize that I have beautiful
wife, beautiful family, but if Ifind myself in a situation
where somebody desperately needshelp, I am going in, I'm going
all in with my training, with myexperience, to help.
(03:50):
I just it's visceral, it'sdivine.
And so my journey over the past15 years has been a very
challenging but also a veryrewarding journey.
And, mandy, I initially thoughtthat I became a police officer
to serve the community that Godcalled me to, and that was only
(04:11):
a part of it.
I was able to see that the menand women who do put on these
capes are human as well and theyare really struggling and they
need guidance.
And some of us have lost ourpurpose along the way and need
to be reminded on who we workfor, and so I always reference
(04:34):
my Lord and Savior, jesus Christ, as Chief JC.
He's the chief, that's who wework for, and if you can get
that into that perspective, thatchanges the game on how you do,
not just being a police officer, but being a husband, being a
dad, being everything.
This has been a remarkablejourney.
I'm just, day by day, trying tostay obedient, submissive to
(04:56):
what God has called me to and hehas blessed me with just an
amazing, strong wife.
You know, you wives have a hardjob dealing with us dads, us
husbands.
You know.
But I tell you what, inpolicing the officers, we have
(05:16):
to process a lot of things thatwe're exposed to, and sometimes
it's hard to walk into the houseafter a shift, and sometimes
it's hard to walk into the houseafter a shift, and so my wife
can just look at me and shealready knows okay, he needs 30
minutes, he needs an hour or,yeah, he's sitting in the
(05:37):
driveway.
He hasn't come into the houseyet because he's processing and
trying to prepare himself to bethe best husband and dad that he
can be before he walks into thefront door.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
I'm so glad I was actually going to ask about that
because you paint such abeautiful picture.
I think we take so for grantedthe service that you guys
provide and the personal baggagethat that brings into your home
of what you see every day.
We take it for granted andthank you for your service,
(06:10):
thank you for any police officerout there that is listening.
But I was going to ask abouthow important is it to have a
strong spouse, that when youwalk in the door and you've had
a horrible day, like how toughis it?
I mean because this is a familything and then also the
conversations that you've had tohave with your spouse and your
(06:33):
children about like I run intothe danger and this is like how
do you process that as a family?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Yeah, you know what the first answer to that is?
We're turning to God first.
We're turning to our faith inthat each and every one of us
has a calling and a purpose forbeing here, and my calling,
daddy's calling, is servinghumanity through the ministry of
policing is serving humanitythrough the ministry of policing
(07:05):
.
If I was not in sync with mycalling, you may have a
different dad interacting withyou.
You deserve a dad that'spursuing their calling, and I
think when your soul is out ofsync and you're doing something
that you think that you shouldbe doing, that can come with
some frustration, that can comewith some emotions that then
(07:27):
could spill over to the peoplethat you love.
And so I encourage my wife, Iencourage my kids, I encourage
everybody, I encourage yourlisteners to pursue your calling
.
You are on this planet for areason.
It is so fulfilling to the soulwhen you can find that.
And so everybody is of theunderstanding that, yes, it is a
(07:51):
dangerous job, but dad is doingwhat he loves to do and if, for
any reason, the good Lorddecides to take daddy home by
means of him pursuing hiscalling, Wow, what an honor, dad
.
We're proud of you.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Just respect, just so much respect there to have the
courage to step into the callingand be obedient, even when you
know it's going to be verydifficult.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
Absolutely, Mandy.
You know, what you just saidreminds me of my chief.
My chief, Jesus Christ, isexactly that's exactly what he
did.
He came here to this planet anddid what he was called to do,
knowing the dangers and knowingthat he would have to lay his
life on the line.
(08:42):
But what does the scripture say?
No greater love, right, nogreater love.
And so it really is a beautifulthing.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
You have so much experience and you're raising
three kids.
How old are your kids now?
Speaker 3 (08:57):
So I have now.
I have a 16 year old, a 12 yearold and a 10 year old.
You are getting the thick of itElementary, middle school and
high school all at once, right?
Speaker 4 (09:08):
now.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
This is why I'm having trouble getting together
with your wife for coffee,because three different schools
right now.
Yes.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Yeah.
So I want to talk about thatbecause you've seen a lot and I
want to specifically ask you,with all of your experience,
what are some things that youtell your kids?
Be on the lookout for this,watch out for this, Like what?
What are some red flags?
Just general stuff aboutprotecting them online, Cause
(09:37):
I'm they, they have phones,right, they have their
technology.
You guys are teaching themresponsibly how to use
technology.
Give us some idea of thosekinds of conversations, because
I think you bring so much wisdomwith your work that you do in
the police force.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Yeah, well, first and foremost and there are times
that hurt people, hurt peopleand we, first and foremost I
(10:14):
feel I need to focus on themoral compass and make sure that
my children are spirituallyhealthy, and by doing that, that
is going to enhance theirdiscernment.
And so so, even to the point towhere I may not give them the
(10:35):
right advice, but if I'mcontinuing to continue to point
them to Christ, the Holy Spiritwill, first and foremost, raise
something, say okay, wait aminute, something's not right
here, something that is notjiving right with my spirit.
So that's my first advice forparents is just okay.
These are our children, are agift to us and it is our
(10:57):
responsibility to steward themproperly.
They belong to the Lord.
They are a gift to us tosteward them properly.
And the best thing that I cangive is there is a tool that's
over thousands of years old.
It's called the Bible.
We have a lot of great tools,what Mandy's doing?
Giving us some great tools, butthis thing here has not changed
(11:21):
and it's very powerful andimpactful.
But also, just, you know,listening to just the language
of people, and if there's somehate speech, if there is some
profanity, you can tell whensomebody is hurt and but is
(11:44):
somebody just being overly niceto welcoming?
You kind of have to discernthrough those things, and so I
am always trying to encourage mychildren to keep your head on
the swivel.
Those who are in the lawenforcement that may be
(12:04):
listening right now.
They know exactly what I'msaying is it's okay to be where
you're at, but just be aware andlook to your left, check that,
look to your right, look behindyou, make sure that everything
is okay, because things happenreally quickly and if you're not
careful, you can find yourselfin a dangerous situation, and so
(12:26):
those are just some of the keythings that I just tell them
just to be aware of.
There are some dangerous,dangerous people out there that
want to take advantage of themand other people, and what I've
found, mandy, in my career asdealing with a lot of suspects
(12:47):
and you probably know thisalready, mandy is they are
experiencing their own trauma aswell, and a majority of the
time as I'm watching them beinginterviewed by detectives, and
when the detectives bring up,hey, you know, tell me about
your family life, they getreally quiet or they get very
(13:08):
emotional, and it always revertsback to someone that was close
to them that broke that trust,back to someone that was close
to them.
That broke that trust and thenthey became numb to love and
next thing, they know they aredoing things that they feel like
they can't turn back andthey've caught themselves in a
very dark space.
So just continuing to have thatconstant conversation, I know I
(13:30):
hear a lot of people say whenthey come across the police so
you arrest the bad guys, rightIs what people would say, and
the kids would say and said no,I have to hold people who make
bad decisions accountable, andso every time I found myself
making an arrest for someone, Ilooked at it as an opportunity
(13:51):
to try and help them understand.
I'm not doing this to hurt them,I'm doing this to help them.
And what?
What can we do after thisexperience to have to have a
better experience?
So I I'm saying all of this yes, people need to be held
accountable, but I there is alevel of compassion as well that
we need to have towards who wecall these perps and these
(14:14):
suspects.
Yes, they need to go, havetheir freedom taken away so that
they can understand that whatthey're doing is wrong, but we
also need to pray for them andunderstand that they are a child
that has been hurt as well.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
I love your answer here, doug, because it's not
like a list of things like watchout for this, watch out for
that.
You are zooming out and you'regoing into your kid's heart and
discipling your kid's heart.
Here You're saying Mandy, thisis the number one thing to
protect my kids from onlinedangers and in-person dangers.
(14:48):
Right, and I absolutely adorethat.
You don't villainize people.
I loved how you started outwith saying hurt people, hurt
people.
We're all broken.
And if I can see the humanityin this person, I may not like
what they chose to do.
I may believe there needs to beconsequences for that, but I'm
looking past that.
It's a person who needs asavior.
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Absolutely, and I want everybody to know again.
I've listened to your podcastand I haven't heard one perfect
parent come on the podcast yet.
And we're all trying, that's OK.
The good Lord is requiringpersistence, which will create
(15:31):
perseverance.
He knows that we're not perfect.
That's what Jesus, that's whatChief JC.
He took care of that perfectionpart.
We have to continue to pursuehim.
But earlier in my police careerand I was new to this power that
was given to me I have thepower to take freedom from
someone.
I have the power to take a dador a mother from their family,
(15:57):
someone.
I have the power to take a dador a mother from their family.
I have the power to possiblytake a life.
When I was initially engagingwith people who were doing
hurtful things in the community,it was frustrating me.
As I mentioned earlier, eversince I was a little boy I've
had this admiration for policeofficers and I also had this, a
little bit of this anger towardsbullies.
(16:18):
So if I'm in the playground andI see somebody bullying
somebody, I Doug Green's on theway.
I'm addressing that as a newofficer with a lot of power.
I was not.
I don't think I was in thathealthier of a space when I
don't think I was in thathealthier of a space when I
don't think I had that muchcompassion initially for those
(16:39):
who were doing these justhurtful, mean things.
And then, once you make thatarrest, now they are cussing you
out and saying what they'regoing to do to your family and I
again, I just want to becompletely frank and honest with
people.
There are times that I have, uh, I've never gone out of uh, uh,
(17:02):
overboard, but there are timeswhen they were given to me
verbally, I gave it back.
I gave it back.
You know, I just I had my weakmoments, but also it was just I
was just frustrated with whywould you make this decision to
hurt this elderly person, thischild, this, these folks?
And, uh, it took a little while, it took some good guidance
(17:23):
from one of my chaplains, one ofmy dear friends, to help remind
me again of my purpose and mycalling.
But again, this is uh, it's awork in progress.
It's a work in progress for allof us.
Mandy, you are a firstresponder.
All of the parents out therelistening, you're first
responders when you first seethat something is not right in
(17:45):
the house.
You're the authority figure inthe house, you have to respond
to it.
If it's not addressedappropriately and in the right
timing, that's when us, thepolice officers, which would
then be the second responders,have to come in and address
things.
Please don't get it confused.
(18:06):
Please call us when you needhelp, but again, we are stewards
and we have an obligation to bethe first responders in our
home and to address the redflags and the things that we see
that are out of order.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
I do want to go back a minute before and talk about
it's hard to be a police officerin this day and age.
Not everybody respects you theway I feel like you need to be
respected.
I think you painted a reallygood picture there about how the
power could be taken out ofcontext if the heart of the
(18:42):
officer is not right, and I feellike that's a big conversation
there, probably amongst yourofficers on it, because it is a
huge responsibility that comeswith a lot of power.
Speaker 3 (18:56):
Yes, it does, and what officers experience is this
thing called compassion fatigue.
We've stepped into thisprofession with purpose on our
heart, with a passion to serveand help people.
But as you're consistentlyexposed to this trauma and all
(19:19):
this anger and all this emotionand you're seeing all these
people hurt, it starts to hardenthe heart a little bit and you
start to drift to a dark spaceand it's almost subtle.
After that you find yourselfbeing abrupt with people and you
find yourself being fatiguedand you find yourself not only
(19:43):
being that way towards thecommunity, but it doesn't stay
in your car, in your locker.
When you're done with yourshift, you start to make your
way home and you're looking forsomething to fill this void and
this anger that you're feeling.
And unfortunately, in thisprofession we have officers that
are turning to alcohol, turningto pornography, turning to some
(20:07):
very dark things to try to helpthem cope.
Hope, and I feel again that mycalling is big.
Part of my calling is to remindthe officers that you're only
going to find this healingthrough Jesus Christ.
If there's a calling, thenthere's a caller.
So that relationship has to beprioritized first and foremost,
(20:33):
and then you will start to seethe fruits and you'll reap the
rewards of working for yourcreator.
And Jeremiah 17, 7 is a verypersonal and dear verse to me.
I just want to at this momentjust acknowledge the Lopez
(20:53):
family and the community that Iserve.
They've been very, verysupportive of me and my family.
There are times I've beencalled out in the middle of the
night and this was the familywhere I would have to.
If my wife was at work, I wouldhave to wake up the kids and
take them to this family andhave them watch my kids for me.
But they had a dear son thataccidentally passed away from a
(21:15):
gun shooting earlier this year.
And his favorite verse and hewould call me Uncle Doug, his
favorite verse Jeremiah 17, 7.
But blessed are those who trustin the Lord and have made the
Lord their hope and confidence.
If we put our trust in God, theroots will run deep and no
(21:40):
matter what crisis comes yourway, okay, you may bend to the
left, bend to the right, but youstill will stay rooted within
your creator and you will beable to sustain that crisis.
But before that verse, itreferences to putting your faith
and hope in people and that'swhen you will start to feel the
(22:02):
uh very negative effects of uhtrying to handle a crisis with
depending on people anddepending on your own strength.
That is a verse that is againvery personal to me, that I
honor my dear friend who hastransitioned and now is in the
presence of the Lord.
But it's just that verse right,there is a reminder to your
listeners, to the policeofficers, first responders out
(22:23):
there Put your trust in ourchief, our God, our Savior.
The storms are going to come.
We can't help that, but watchhow much joy and how much
strength you'll be able toexperience when that storm comes
.
And so policing I believe in nodisrespect whatsoever to any
(22:47):
other profession out there, it'sthat's your calling.
But, man, you can.
You can really Get a grasp anda sense of walking in the shoes
of Jesus Christ when you're apolice officer, because people
call you and once you get there,they may not want you there,
(23:07):
they may hate you.
There are people that aretrying to hurt you, people that
are trying to kill you, and youhave to respond.
We don't ask you what is yourrace, what is your income, what
side of town do you live on,what is your religion?
Every officer has to respond tothe call.
(23:28):
And Jesus said a newcommandment I give you love one
another just as I have loved you, so you must love one another,
and by this the world will knowthat you belong to me.
I am your chief and so it isagain.
(23:49):
We are talking about a lot of avariety of different things
within the policing and thedarkness, but it is a beautiful
profession in my humble opinion,because we've been able to be
the light in the darkness andwe've seen a lot of lives
changed in Jesus' name.
And, mandy, whether you realizeit or not, what you're doing
(24:13):
has a direct impact on policeofficers responding to these
calls.
You're helping parents respondto this in a healthy way, and
that's one less traumaticincident that God has helped
prevent it through you.
And that's one less traumaticincident that has been put on
(24:33):
another human being that's apolice officer.
So that's one less traumatic.
And so now it all comes fullcircle that you are actually
helping police officers, yes,with these investigations, but
with their souls, okay, this isone less incident that they have
to respond to.
That is so hurtful and we can'thelp but take on some of that
(24:58):
as human beings.
You're so kind.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
You know it takes all of us.
We all have to do our part,just like your sweet Lopez
family that you talked aboutserving your family in a way
when you need help with the kidsand this is what community is
what Jesus meant by community.
Right, we need that circle ofpeople in our life and we're all
(25:22):
doing our thing that God calledus to do, and if we do that,
then we can serve the world wellright Through our God-given
abilities.
So I love that.
You know one of the things we'vebeen talking a lot about
policing, and I love how you arepainting the picture for us
about how Jesus traits andhumility and service and being
(25:48):
humble, not getting prideful inpowerful situations, like all of
these traits of Jesus arecoming through in your policing,
and I, and I love that.
I kind of want to move, though,to how do those traits come out
in your parenting, because weyou know we were talking
beforehand and, um, you know,you said I have these, these
(26:13):
volatile situations that I'mcalled into, like you said, I'm
kind of like very similar toJesus here.
They'll call me and then theydon't want me here and they hate
that.
They even asked right, and soI'm left to deal with it.
But I want to take those skillsthat you've learned to
deescalate situations and movethem into the home.
(26:34):
How has it helped you parentingteenagers?
You know I joked with youbefore.
We've got teens, we've gotmenopausal moms we got all these
emotions in the home and youwalk in the door right and
you've had trauma all day, andso how does it help you deal
(26:54):
with family situations that arevery escalated and emotional at
home?
Speaker 3 (27:00):
So in policing we have what's called the use of
force continuum.
Okay, when a police officershows up, whether he's called or
not, and people see the officer, we're already showing a sign
of force.
Okay, it's very obvious that weare an authority figure.
It's very obvious that we havethings around our belt that we
(27:22):
can utilize to handle thesituation if we need to.
So already that presence ofthat authority should get that
other person to start thinkingokay, should I tune it up right
now and be a better person?
Should I make good decisions?
Or what will happen if I make abad decision right now?
That authority figure isprobably going to respond.
(27:45):
So it gets that person tothinking the next thing, the
next force continuing, is justtalking and listening to that
individual.
Okay, not per se judging rightaway, but letting them know.
Okay, I'm here, I'm anauthority figure, I have power
(28:06):
in this situation to make somedecisions that may impact your
life, but I'm willing to listen.
Within the force continuum, youcan find yourself in going to
using your weapons.
Again, we're matching the, theenergy, and we're matching the
response to the situation.
(28:29):
Now let's kind of go back andtie this into parenting.
When there is a situation withyour child.
It's important that you, ofcourse, be present.
The child knows already thatyou are the authority figure,
that you are the parent, andthat you are the parent and that
you are in charge.
(28:49):
Okay, it may not seem like thatin the moment, depending on
their emotions, but they know itin their soul.
They know that you have raisedthem, they know that you have
sacrificed for them, they knowthat you are in charge and that
now that you are present but nowit's important we talk about
pride and power.
Do not let the pride and powerof being the authority figure,
being the dad and the mom in thehouse and say this Things are
(29:11):
going to be the way I want themto be Because, why?
Because I said so and I pay thebills around here, I'm the one
that's working.
So what would I say goes.
No, that's not a healthyapproach when you're showing
love to them and say, okay,let's listen, tell me what's
(29:36):
going on.
A lot of times, mandy, you cansquash the problem right there,
at that particular forcecontinuum measure.
It's just like letting them getit out, letting them vent and
not being judgmental, and sothat is what I use.
I always just let my here,daddies, I just want to listen.
I remember I love you, ok, andI'm here for you and I want the
best for you, ok, I don't wantto to hurt you, I want to to see
(30:02):
you prosper.
And this sounds biblical,doesn't it?
Of our good, good father.
So just doing some activelistening to them.
And now it's time to use my nextforce.
Continuum is my voice, mytraining, my experience.
Yeah, you know what, son, Iremember when I was your age and
(30:25):
this happened to me.
You know, and this is how Ihandle it, I wish I would have
did it this way.
I see your perspective, son.
I do see that.
Now, you know, let's see how wecan, how can we remedy this so
it's healthier for you,healthier for mom and dad,
healthier for the wholesituation.
Those are the, these are thingsthat I have learned in the
training academy and in myexperience, that I apply.
(30:47):
And so there's no yelling andthere's no huge frustrations in
the house because we are tryingto practice being active
listeners.
And the next force continuing isif my children have really done
something that I feel that hasbeen out of their calling and
has really done been somethingthat has may have hurt somebody.
(31:09):
Ok, listen, there's going to beconsequences for that.
Again.
I'm not doing this because Idislike you.
I like punishing people.
I have an obligation to stewardyou in the proper way, and so
now you're going to have to facethese consequences.
You know, and OK, there's,there's a lot of poop in the
backyard.
Ok, here's the, here's thehere's the shovel.
(31:31):
Go to town, ok, and you've gotthat duty, no pun intended, for
the next couple of weeks.
So, but, but again, it'sdisciplining with love.
Now we're going back, mandyagain, to those biblical values.
This thing has been around forthousands of years and is very
applicable and effective.
(31:53):
Brothers and sisters who arelistening, use this.
It is a weapon.
I always like to tell people goahead, go ahead and open carry.
You got a police officertelling you to open carry, open
carry your weapon.
That.
God has given you and use it.
Yes, open, carry your Bible Forthose who are listening and not
(32:14):
watching.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
He's holding up a Bible right now.
He is holding up a Bible.
Speaker 3 (32:18):
Yes, yes, yes.
It is the word of God, you know, but it is powerful.
It's a double-edged sword.
It is beautiful and is here foryou and for me and for your
family.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
I love the steps that you walked us through, that you
got in your training and thathow it applies to your home,
because, man, that you know,recognizing that they do see you
as an authority and they arekind of scared of you and
sometimes they think we'reperfect and they're not and they
feel shame, which is silly, weknow, because we know we're
flawed, right, but they see usin a different light, just like
(32:56):
you showing up on the scene of aissue.
And then I loved the step twoabout listening to them.
People want to feel heard.
Listening to them, people wantto feel heard.
Your kids want to feel heard,and I think this is so important
.
And so many times we rush tojudgment because we we maybe
(33:16):
found something on our kid'sphone and we're just so mad and
we're just going in, you know,with with all the consequences
and screaming and dah, dah, dah,dah, dah, dah, instead of like,
why did you do this?
Like help me understand whathappened here.
You know and I just think thatis so important how you walked
us through those steps.
(33:36):
It's just so good for us to seethat visual with us in our
homes, with our kids.
Doug, is there anything elseyou want to tell our parents?
Speaker 3 (33:49):
Yes, with our kids.
Doug, is there anything elseyou want to tell our parents?
Yes, there's just one lastthing that I'd love to leave all
the parents with, especiallythe dads.
Especially the dads I know inmany different circumstances.
We're out there, we're workinga lot.
I have a very, very busyschedule, but I try to make it a
point every night I go by myson's room, we sit down and we
(34:12):
have a conversation, we pick upa devotional, we talk about
God's word and we work on memoryverses because, dads, I'm
trying to get into my kids'subconscious mind with the word
of God by helping them memorizeverses.
Ok, that is another powerfulthing that you can do with your
(34:34):
children, just memorizing verses, because once they get into a
situation, boom, oh, the Lord ismy shepherd, I have all that I
need.
Ok, I'm going to be OK and Imake my way to spend individual
time with my children everynight and listen.
It can be five minutes, 10minutes, depending on however
the spirit leads.
Sometimes I'm just really tired, ok, but I make it into that
(34:56):
room and say let's pray, let'spray together.
Consistency leads to intimacy.
So try the best that you can tostay consistent with the time
that you're spending with yourkids, even if it's a little bit.
God does a lot with a little,and so that's my encouragement
as we are wrapping up thisconversation.
Moms and dads, if you can takefive minutes a day just to sit,
(35:22):
listen, talk, but use the wordof God within the conversation
and watch your children prosper.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
I love that you talked specifically to dads
there, doug, because that's whatGod means when he says husbands
are supposed to be the leadersin the home.
That's what we're talking abouthere.
It's not a dictator, it's notsomebody screaming in with power
saying you do this, you do that, you submit here.
That is not what God intended.
You are giving us a real visualof what it means to lead in the
(35:54):
home.
Be the spiritual leader in yourhome, pray with your children,
make time for it and then, whensituations arise, respond with
that godly character oflistening and letting them be
heard and coming alongside ofthem and loving them
unconditionally, no matter what,and then walking in through
(36:15):
some life wisdom on why thatmaybe wasn't a good choice.
Like you really have painted agreat picture of what it means
to be a leader in the home.
So I just thank you for you andyour sweet family.
I thank you for serving as apolice officer and I just pray
so many blessings over you andall the officers who keep us
(36:36):
safe every day.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
Oh praise God.
Thank you so much, Manny.
Thank you for what you're doing, and let's just remember who we
work for.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Thank you, Doug.
Speaker 4 (36:46):
Next Talk is a 501c3 nonprofit keeping kids safe
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To support our work, make adonation at nexttalkorg.
Next Talk resources are notintended to replace the advice
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(37:06):
personal treatment plan.
Welcome to the Next Talk podcast.
We are a nonprofit passionateabout keeping kids safe online.
We're learning together how tonavigate tech, culture and faith
with our kids.
I am here with Doug Green today.
He is a Christian, a husband, adad and a police officer of 15
(00:25):
years.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Doug welcome to the show.
Tell us a little bit more aboutyourself.
I know I gave a lot of the bigthings right there.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Well, thank you, mandy.
It's such an honor to be on theshow.
Thank you for the invite to beon the show.
Thank you for the invite, mandy.
You're not just my friend, youare my sister, you are very
(00:57):
close to my wife, and yourmission, your kingdom calling,
has had a direct impact on ourfamily, and so I want to thank
you for your submission, yourobedience, and I also know that
that comes with some weight tocarry and it takes work and
stress, but you know why you'rehere on this planet, and so I'm
just.
It's always good to be inconversation with good people
(01:18):
who have passion, and that's whyI feel God led me into the
world of policing.
And you know, ever since I wasa little boy Mandy again, it's
all God when I look back on itbut whenever I saw a police car
or a police officer, I stoppedeverything that I was doing If I
(01:39):
was playing ball or, you know,hanging out with family.
If I saw a police, I stoppedand I just stared at them and it
was like the police car wasmoving in slow motion, the
police officer was walking inslow motion.
They were like superheroes tome, like Superman standing on
(02:01):
top of the Empire State Buildingand his cape is flapping in the
wind so slowly.
And I knew that there'ssomething special about these
human beings who make the freewill decision to go to the
danger and not away from it.
And I recognized that at anearly age and it captured my
(02:25):
heart, it captured my attention,but, I would be honest, I
didn't think that I was going tobecome a police officer.
And as the years went by and Ilater found out that my great
grandmother was the eighthAfrican-American female officer
that the Los Angeles PoliceDepartment had hired, I was like
(02:45):
wow, it's in the blood.
And I learned a little bitabout her passion.
I never got the opportunity tomeet her, but I learned about
her passion for the youth andfor serving people.
And it wasn't until I was 29years old and the good Lord said
are you ready?
And I knew, with that question,that that was, that was a
(03:08):
statement.
It's time to step into theministry of policing.
And when there was a lot of alot was within that question.
Mandy is Doug, are you willingto lay your life on the line for
complete strangers?
Are you ready to go towards thedanger and not away from it?
(03:28):
And, mandy, it was an absoluteto this day.
Yes, within my soul, yes, Irecognize that I have beautiful
wife, beautiful family, but if Ifind myself in a situation
where somebody desperately needshelp, I am going in, I'm going
all in with my training, with myexperience, to help.
(03:50):
I just it's visceral, it'sdivine.
And so my journey over the past15 years has been a very
challenging but also a veryrewarding journey.
And, mandy, I initially thoughtthat I became a police officer
to serve the community that Godcalled me to, and that was only
(04:11):
a part of it.
I was able to see that the menand women who do put on these
capes are human as well and theyare really struggling and they
need guidance.
And some of us have lost ourpurpose along the way and need
to be reminded on who we workfor, and so I always reference
(04:34):
my Lord and Savior, jesus Christ, as Chief JC.
He's the chief, that's who wework for, and if you can get
that into that perspective, thatchanges the game on how you do,
not just being a police officer, but being a husband, being a
dad, being everything.
This has been a remarkablejourney.
I'm just, day by day, trying tostay obedient, submissive to
(04:56):
what God has called me to and hehas blessed me with just an
amazing, strong wife.
You know, you wives have a hardjob dealing with us dads, us
husbands.
You know.
But I tell you what, inpolicing the officers, we have
(05:16):
to process a lot of things thatwe're exposed to, and sometimes
it's hard to walk into the houseafter a shift, and sometimes
it's hard to walk into the houseafter a shift, and so my wife
can just look at me and shealready knows okay, he needs 30
minutes, he needs an hour or,yeah, he's sitting in the
(05:37):
driveway.
He hasn't come into the houseyet because he's processing and
trying to prepare himself to bethe best husband and dad that he
can be before he walks into thefront door.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
I'm so glad I was actually going to ask about that
because you paint such abeautiful picture.
I think we take so for grantedthe service that you guys
provide and the personal baggagethat that brings into your home
of what you see every day.
We take it for granted andthank you for your service,
(06:10):
thank you for any police officerout there that is listening.
But I was going to ask abouthow important is it to have a
strong spouse, that when youwalk in the door and you've had
a horrible day, like how toughis it?
I mean because this is a familything and then also the
conversations that you've had tohave with your spouse and your
(06:33):
children about like I run intothe danger and this is like how
do you process that as a family?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Yeah, you know what the first answer to that is?
We're turning to God first.
We're turning to our faith inthat each and every one of us
has a calling and a purpose forbeing here, and my calling,
daddy's calling, is servinghumanity through the ministry of
policing is serving humanitythrough the ministry of policing
(07:05):
.
If I was not in sync with mycalling, you may have a
different dad interacting withyou.
You deserve a dad that'spursuing their calling, and I
think when your soul is out ofsync and you're doing something
that you think that you shouldbe doing, that can come with
some frustration, that can comewith some emotions that then
(07:27):
could spill over to the peoplethat you love.
And so I encourage my wife, Iencourage my kids, I encourage
everybody, I encourage yourlisteners to pursue your calling
.
You are on this planet for areason.
It is so fulfilling to the soulwhen you can find that.
And so everybody is of theunderstanding that, yes, it is a
(07:51):
dangerous job, but dad is doingwhat he loves to do and if, for
any reason, the good Lorddecides to take daddy home by
means of him pursuing hiscalling, Wow, what an honor, dad
.
We're proud of you.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Just respect, just so much respect there to have the
courage to step into the callingand be obedient, even when you
know it's going to be verydifficult.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
Absolutely, Mandy.
You know, what you just saidreminds me of my chief.
My chief, Jesus Christ, isexactly that's exactly what he
did.
He came here to this planet anddid what he was called to do,
knowing the dangers and knowingthat he would have to lay his
life on the line.
(08:42):
But what does the scripture say?
No greater love, right, nogreater love.
And so it really is a beautifulthing.
Speaker 1 (08:52):
You have so much experience and you're raising
three kids.
How old are your kids now?
Speaker 3 (08:57):
So I have now.
I have a 16 year old, a 12 yearold and a 10 year old.
You are getting the thick of itElementary, middle school and
high school all at once, right?
Speaker 4 (09:08):
now.
Speaker 2 (09:08):
This is why I'm having trouble getting together
with your wife for coffee,because three different schools
right now.
Yes.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Yeah.
So I want to talk about thatbecause you've seen a lot and I
want to specifically ask you,with all of your experience,
what are some things that youtell your kids?
Be on the lookout for this,watch out for this, Like what?
What are some red flags?
Just general stuff aboutprotecting them online, Cause
(09:37):
I'm they, they have phones,right, they have their
technology.
You guys are teaching themresponsibly how to use
technology.
Give us some idea of thosekinds of conversations, because
I think you bring so much wisdomwith your work that you do in
the police force.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Yeah, well, first and foremost and there are times
that hurt people, hurt peopleand we, first and foremost I
(10:14):
feel I need to focus on themoral compass and make sure that
my children are spirituallyhealthy, and by doing that, that
is going to enhance theirdiscernment.
And so so, even to the point towhere I may not give them the
(10:35):
right advice, but if I'mcontinuing to continue to point
them to Christ, the Holy Spiritwill, first and foremost, raise
something, say okay, wait aminute, something's not right
here, something that is notjiving right with my spirit.
So that's my first advice forparents is just okay.
These are our children, are agift to us and it is our
(10:57):
responsibility to steward themproperly.
They belong to the Lord.
They are a gift to us tosteward them properly.
And the best thing that I cangive is there is a tool that's
over thousands of years old.
It's called the Bible.
We have a lot of great tools,what Mandy's doing?
Giving us some great tools, butthis thing here has not changed
(11:21):
and it's very powerful andimpactful.
But also, just, you know,listening to just the language
of people, and if there's somehate speech, if there is some
profanity, you can tell whensomebody is hurt and but is
(11:44):
somebody just being overly niceto welcoming?
You kind of have to discernthrough those things, and so I
am always trying to encourage mychildren to keep your head on
the swivel.
Those who are in the lawenforcement that may be
(12:04):
listening right now.
They know exactly what I'msaying is it's okay to be where
you're at, but just be aware andlook to your left, check that,
look to your right, look behindyou, make sure that everything
is okay, because things happenreally quickly and if you're not
careful, you can find yourselfin a dangerous situation, and so
(12:26):
those are just some of the keythings that I just tell them
just to be aware of.
There are some dangerous,dangerous people out there that
want to take advantage of themand other people, and what I've
found, mandy, in my career asdealing with a lot of suspects
(12:47):
and you probably know thisalready, mandy is they are
experiencing their own trauma aswell, and a majority of the
time as I'm watching them beinginterviewed by detectives, and
when the detectives bring up,hey, you know, tell me about
your family life, they getreally quiet or they get very
(13:08):
emotional, and it always revertsback to someone that was close
to them that broke that trust,back to someone that was close
to them.
That broke that trust and thenthey became numb to love and
next thing, they know they aredoing things that they feel like
they can't turn back andthey've caught themselves in a
very dark space.
So just continuing to have thatconstant conversation, I know I
(13:30):
hear a lot of people say whenthey come across the police so
you arrest the bad guys, rightIs what people would say, and
the kids would say and said no,I have to hold people who make
bad decisions accountable, andso every time I found myself
making an arrest for someone, Ilooked at it as an opportunity
(13:51):
to try and help them understand.
I'm not doing this to hurt them,I'm doing this to help them.
And what?
What can we do after thisexperience to have to have a
better experience?
So I I'm saying all of this yes, people need to be held
accountable, but I there is alevel of compassion as well that
we need to have towards who wecall these perps and these
(14:14):
suspects.
Yes, they need to go, havetheir freedom taken away so that
they can understand that whatthey're doing is wrong, but we
also need to pray for them andunderstand that they are a child
that has been hurt as well.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
I love your answer here, doug, because it's not
like a list of things like watchout for this, watch out for
that.
You are zooming out and you'regoing into your kid's heart and
discipling your kid's heart.
Here You're saying Mandy, thisis the number one thing to
protect my kids from onlinedangers and in-person dangers.
(14:48):
Right, and I absolutely adorethat.
You don't villainize people.
I loved how you started outwith saying hurt people, hurt
people.
We're all broken.
And if I can see the humanityin this person, I may not like
what they chose to do.
I may believe there needs to beconsequences for that, but I'm
looking past that.
It's a person who needs asavior.
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Absolutely, and I want everybody to know again.
I've listened to your podcastand I haven't heard one perfect
parent come on the podcast yet.
And we're all trying, that's OK.
The good Lord is requiringpersistence, which will create
(15:31):
perseverance.
He knows that we're not perfect.
That's what Jesus, that's whatChief JC.
He took care of that perfectionpart.
We have to continue to pursuehim.
But earlier in my police careerand I was new to this power that
was given to me I have thepower to take freedom from
someone.
I have the power to take a dador a mother from their family,
(15:57):
someone.
I have the power to take a dador a mother from their family.
I have the power to possiblytake a life.
When I was initially engagingwith people who were doing
hurtful things in the community,it was frustrating me.
As I mentioned earlier, eversince I was a little boy I've
had this admiration for policeofficers and I also had this, a
little bit of this anger towardsbullies.
(16:18):
So if I'm in the playground andI see somebody bullying
somebody, I Doug Green's on theway.
I'm addressing that as a newofficer with a lot of power.
I was not.
I don't think I was in thathealthier of a space when I
don't think I was in thathealthier of a space when I
don't think I had that muchcompassion initially for those
(16:39):
who were doing these justhurtful, mean things.
And then, once you make thatarrest, now they are cussing you
out and saying what they'regoing to do to your family and I
again, I just want to becompletely frank and honest with
people.
There are times that I have, uh, I've never gone out of uh, uh,
(17:02):
overboard, but there are timeswhen they were given to me
verbally, I gave it back.
I gave it back.
You know, I just I had my weakmoments, but also it was just I
was just frustrated with whywould you make this decision to
hurt this elderly person, thischild, this, these folks?
And, uh, it took a little while, it took some good guidance
(17:23):
from one of my chaplains, one ofmy dear friends, to help remind
me again of my purpose and mycalling.
But again, this is uh, it's awork in progress.
It's a work in progress for allof us.
Mandy, you are a firstresponder.
All of the parents out therelistening, you're first
responders when you first seethat something is not right in
(17:45):
the house.
You're the authority figure inthe house, you have to respond
to it.
If it's not addressedappropriately and in the right
timing, that's when us, thepolice officers, which would
then be the second responders,have to come in and address
things.
Please don't get it confused.
(18:06):
Please call us when you needhelp, but again, we are stewards
and we have an obligation to bethe first responders in our
home and to address the redflags and the things that we see
that are out of order.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
I do want to go back a minute before and talk about
it's hard to be a police officerin this day and age.
Not everybody respects you theway I feel like you need to be
respected.
I think you painted a reallygood picture there about how the
power could be taken out ofcontext if the heart of the
(18:42):
officer is not right, and I feellike that's a big conversation
there, probably amongst yourofficers on it, because it is a
huge responsibility that comeswith a lot of power.
Speaker 3 (18:56):
Yes, it does, and what officers experience is this
thing called compassion fatigue.
We've stepped into thisprofession with purpose on our
heart, with a passion to serveand help people.
But as you're consistentlyexposed to this trauma and all
(19:19):
this anger and all this emotionand you're seeing all these
people hurt, it starts to hardenthe heart a little bit and you
start to drift to a dark spaceand it's almost subtle.
After that you find yourselfbeing abrupt with people and you
find yourself being fatiguedand you find yourself not only
(19:43):
being that way towards thecommunity, but it doesn't stay
in your car, in your locker.
When you're done with yourshift, you start to make your
way home and you're looking forsomething to fill this void and
this anger that you're feeling.
And unfortunately, in thisprofession we have officers that
are turning to alcohol, turningto pornography, turning to some
(20:07):
very dark things to try to helpthem cope.
Hope, and I feel again that mycalling is big.
Part of my calling is to remindthe officers that you're only
going to find this healingthrough Jesus Christ.
If there's a calling, thenthere's a caller.
So that relationship has to beprioritized first and foremost,
(20:33):
and then you will start to seethe fruits and you'll reap the
rewards of working for yourcreator.
And Jeremiah 17, 7 is a verypersonal and dear verse to me.
I just want to at this momentjust acknowledge the Lopez
(20:53):
family and the community that Iserve.
They've been very, verysupportive of me and my family.
There are times I've beencalled out in the middle of the
night and this was the familywhere I would have to.
If my wife was at work, I wouldhave to wake up the kids and
take them to this family andhave them watch my kids for me.
But they had a dear son thataccidentally passed away from a
(21:15):
gun shooting earlier this year.
And his favorite verse and hewould call me Uncle Doug, his
favorite verse Jeremiah 17, 7.
But blessed are those who trustin the Lord and have made the
Lord their hope and confidence.
If we put our trust in God, theroots will run deep and no
(21:40):
matter what crisis comes yourway, okay, you may bend to the
left, bend to the right, but youstill will stay rooted within
your creator and you will beable to sustain that crisis.
But before that verse, itreferences to putting your faith
and hope in people and that'swhen you will start to feel the
(22:02):
uh very negative effects of uhtrying to handle a crisis with
depending on people anddepending on your own strength.
That is a verse that is againvery personal to me, that I
honor my dear friend who hastransitioned and now is in the
presence of the Lord.
But it's just that verse right,there is a reminder to your
listeners, to the policeofficers, first responders out
(22:23):
there Put your trust in ourchief, our God, our Savior.
The storms are going to come.
We can't help that, but watchhow much joy and how much
strength you'll be able toexperience when that storm comes
.
And so policing I believe in nodisrespect whatsoever to any
(22:47):
other profession out there, it'sthat's your calling.
But, man, you can.
You can really Get a grasp anda sense of walking in the shoes
of Jesus Christ when you're apolice officer, because people
call you and once you get there,they may not want you there,
(23:07):
they may hate you.
There are people that aretrying to hurt you, people that
are trying to kill you, and youhave to respond.
We don't ask you what is yourrace, what is your income, what
side of town do you live on,what is your religion?
Every officer has to respond tothe call.
(23:28):
And Jesus said a newcommandment I give you love one
another just as I have loved you, so you must love one another,
and by this the world will knowthat you belong to me.
I am your chief and so it isagain.
(23:49):
We are talking about a lot of avariety of different things
within the policing and thedarkness, but it is a beautiful
profession in my humble opinion,because we've been able to be
the light in the darkness andwe've seen a lot of lives
changed in Jesus' name.
And, mandy, whether you realizeit or not, what you're doing
(24:13):
has a direct impact on policeofficers responding to these
calls.
You're helping parents respondto this in a healthy way, and
that's one less traumaticincident that God has helped
prevent it through you.
And that's one less traumaticincident that has been put on
(24:33):
another human being that's apolice officer.
So that's one less traumatic.
And so now it all comes fullcircle that you are actually
helping police officers, yes,with these investigations, but
with their souls, okay, this isone less incident that they have
to respond to.
That is so hurtful and we can'thelp but take on some of that
(24:58):
as human beings.
You're so kind.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
You know it takes all of us.
We all have to do our part,just like your sweet Lopez
family that you talked aboutserving your family in a way
when you need help with the kidsand this is what community is
what Jesus meant by community.
Right, we need that circle ofpeople in our life and we're all
(25:22):
doing our thing that God calledus to do, and if we do that,
then we can serve the world wellright Through our God-given
abilities.
So I love that.
You know one of the things we'vebeen talking a lot about
policing, and I love how you arepainting the picture for us
about how Jesus traits andhumility and service and being
(25:48):
humble, not getting prideful inpowerful situations, like all of
these traits of Jesus arecoming through in your policing,
and I, and I love that.
I kind of want to move, though,to how do those traits come out
in your parenting, because weyou know we were talking
beforehand and, um, you know,you said I have these, these
(26:13):
volatile situations that I'mcalled into, like you said, I'm
kind of like very similar toJesus here.
They'll call me and then theydon't want me here and they hate
that.
They even asked right, and soI'm left to deal with it.
But I want to take those skillsthat you've learned to
deescalate situations and movethem into the home.
(26:34):
How has it helped you parentingteenagers?
You know I joked with youbefore.
We've got teens, we've gotmenopausal moms we got all these
emotions in the home and youwalk in the door right and
you've had trauma all day, andso how does it help you deal
(26:54):
with family situations that arevery escalated and emotional at
home?
Speaker 3 (27:00):
So in policing we have what's called the use of
force continuum.
Okay, when a police officershows up, whether he's called or
not, and people see the officer, we're already showing a sign
of force.
Okay, it's very obvious that weare an authority figure.
It's very obvious that we havethings around our belt that we
(27:22):
can utilize to handle thesituation if we need to.
So already that presence ofthat authority should get that
other person to start thinkingokay, should I tune it up right
now and be a better person?
Should I make good decisions?
Or what will happen if I make abad decision right now?
That authority figure isprobably going to respond.
(27:45):
So it gets that person tothinking the next thing, the
next force continuing, is justtalking and listening to that
individual.
Okay, not per se judging rightaway, but letting them know.
Okay, I'm here, I'm anauthority figure, I have power
(28:06):
in this situation to make somedecisions that may impact your
life, but I'm willing to listen.
Within the force continuum, youcan find yourself in going to
using your weapons.
Again, we're matching the, theenergy, and we're matching the
response to the situation.
(28:29):
Now let's kind of go back andtie this into parenting.
When there is a situation withyour child.
It's important that you, ofcourse, be present.
The child knows already thatyou are the authority figure,
that you are the parent, andthat you are the parent and that
you are in charge.
(28:49):
Okay, it may not seem like thatin the moment, depending on
their emotions, but they know itin their soul.
They know that you have raisedthem, they know that you have
sacrificed for them, they knowthat you are in charge and that
now that you are present but nowit's important we talk about
pride and power.
Do not let the pride and powerof being the authority figure,
being the dad and the mom in thehouse and say this Things are
(29:11):
going to be the way I want themto be Because, why?
Because I said so and I pay thebills around here, I'm the one
that's working.
So what would I say goes.
No, that's not a healthyapproach when you're showing
love to them and say, okay,let's listen, tell me what's
(29:36):
going on.
A lot of times, mandy, you cansquash the problem right there,
at that particular forcecontinuum measure.
It's just like letting them getit out, letting them vent and
not being judgmental, and sothat is what I use.
I always just let my here,daddies, I just want to listen.
I remember I love you, ok, andI'm here for you and I want the
best for you, ok, I don't wantto to hurt you, I want to to see
(30:02):
you prosper.
And this sounds biblical,doesn't it?
Of our good, good father.
So just doing some activelistening to them.
And now it's time to use my nextforce.
Continuum is my voice, mytraining, my experience.
Yeah, you know what, son, Iremember when I was your age and
(30:25):
this happened to me.
You know, and this is how Ihandle it, I wish I would have
did it this way.
I see your perspective, son.
I do see that.
Now, you know, let's see how wecan, how can we remedy this so
it's healthier for you,healthier for mom and dad,
healthier for the wholesituation.
Those are the, these are thingsthat I have learned in the
training academy and in myexperience, that I apply.
(30:47):
And so there's no yelling andthere's no huge frustrations in
the house because we are tryingto practice being active
listeners.
And the next force continuing isif my children have really done
something that I feel that hasbeen out of their calling and
has really done been somethingthat has may have hurt somebody.
(31:09):
Ok, listen, there's going to beconsequences for that.
Again.
I'm not doing this because Idislike you.
I like punishing people.
I have an obligation to stewardyou in the proper way, and so
now you're going to have to facethese consequences.
You know, and OK, there's,there's a lot of poop in the
backyard.
Ok, here's the, here's thehere's the shovel.
(31:31):
Go to town, ok, and you've gotthat duty, no pun intended, for
the next couple of weeks.
So, but, but again, it'sdisciplining with love.
Now we're going back, mandyagain, to those biblical values.
This thing has been around forthousands of years and is very
applicable and effective.
(31:53):
Brothers and sisters who arelistening, use this.
It is a weapon.
I always like to tell people goahead, go ahead and open carry.
You got a police officertelling you to open carry, open
carry your weapon.
That.
God has given you and use it.
Yes, open, carry your Bible Forthose who are listening and not
(32:14):
watching.
Speaker 2 (32:14):
He's holding up a Bible right now.
He is holding up a Bible.
Speaker 3 (32:18):
Yes, yes, yes.
It is the word of God, you know, but it is powerful.
It's a double-edged sword.
It is beautiful and is here foryou and for me and for your
family.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
I love the steps that you walked us through, that you
got in your training and thathow it applies to your home,
because, man, that you know,recognizing that they do see you
as an authority and they arekind of scared of you and
sometimes they think we'reperfect and they're not and they
feel shame, which is silly, weknow, because we know we're
flawed, right, but they see usin a different light, just like
(32:56):
you showing up on the scene of aissue.
And then I loved the step twoabout listening to them.
People want to feel heard.
Listening to them, people wantto feel heard.
Your kids want to feel heard,and I think this is so important
.
And so many times we rush tojudgment because we we maybe
(33:16):
found something on our kid'sphone and we're just so mad and
we're just going in, you know,with with all the consequences
and screaming and dah, dah, dah,dah, dah, dah, instead of like,
why did you do this?
Like help me understand whathappened here.
You know and I just think thatis so important how you walked
us through those steps.
(33:36):
It's just so good for us to seethat visual with us in our
homes, with our kids.
Doug, is there anything elseyou want to tell our parents?
Speaker 3 (33:49):
Yes, with our kids.
Doug, is there anything elseyou want to tell our parents?
Yes, there's just one lastthing that I'd love to leave all
the parents with, especiallythe dads.
Especially the dads I know inmany different circumstances.
We're out there, we're workinga lot.
I have a very, very busyschedule, but I try to make it a
point every night I go by myson's room, we sit down and we
(34:12):
have a conversation, we pick upa devotional, we talk about
God's word and we work on memoryverses because, dads, I'm
trying to get into my kids'subconscious mind with the word
of God by helping them memorizeverses.
Ok, that is another powerfulthing that you can do with your
(34:34):
children, just memorizing verses, because once they get into a
situation, boom, oh, the Lord ismy shepherd, I have all that I
need.
Ok, I'm going to be OK and Imake my way to spend individual
time with my children everynight and listen.
It can be five minutes, 10minutes, depending on however
the spirit leads.
Sometimes I'm just really tired, ok, but I make it into that
(34:56):
room and say let's pray, let'spray together.
Consistency leads to intimacy.
So try the best that you can tostay consistent with the time
that you're spending with yourkids, even if it's a little bit.
God does a lot with a little,and so that's my encouragement
as we are wrapping up thisconversation.
Moms and dads, if you can takefive minutes a day just to sit,
(35:22):
listen, talk, but use the wordof God within the conversation
and watch your children prosper.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
I love that you talked specifically to dads
there, doug, because that's whatGod means when he says husbands
are supposed to be the leadersin the home.
That's what we're talking abouthere.
It's not a dictator, it's notsomebody screaming in with power
saying you do this, you do that, you submit here.
That is not what God intended.
You are giving us a real visualof what it means to lead in the
(35:54):
home.
Be the spiritual leader in yourhome, pray with your children,
make time for it and then, whensituations arise, respond with
that godly character oflistening and letting them be
heard and coming alongside ofthem and loving them
unconditionally, no matter what,and then walking in through
(36:15):
some life wisdom on why thatmaybe wasn't a good choice.
Like you really have painted agreat picture of what it means
to be a leader in the home.
So I just thank you for you andyour sweet family.
I thank you for serving as apolice officer and I just pray
so many blessings over you andall the officers who keep us
(36:36):
safe every day.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
Oh praise God.
Thank you so much, Manny.
Thank you for what you're doing, and let's just remember who we
work for.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Thank you, Doug.
Speaker 4 (36:46):
Next Talk is a 501c3 nonprofit keeping kids safe
online.
To support our work, make adonation at nexttalkorg.
Next Talk resources are notintended to replace the advice
of a trained healthcare or legalprofessional, or to diagnose,
treat or otherwise render expertadvice regarding any type of
medical, psychological, legal,financial or other problem.
You are advised to consult aqualified expert for your
(37:06):
personal treatment plan.
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