January 22, 2024 • 27 mins
Our latest chat isn't just about guiding others; it's a deep dive into what makes a coach genuinely impactful.
This episode is an essential playbook for coaches aiming to harness their inner leader and make a genuine difference.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Today.
I thought it would be fun totalk about leadership in the
coaching world, because Ibelieve that you can create
leadership right.
Like people aren't just born tobe a leader, I think that
leadership is something that wecan create and cultivate within
ourselves.
If that's something that wewant to be and to be a coach,
(00:26):
one would think you would haveto be a leader if you're going
to be leading other people.
And if you're also going to bea coach who's leading other
people, you need to be leadingyourself and your own business.
So I think if you're going tobe a good coach, you need to
have leader vibes, and that'swhat I want to talk about today.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
I want to talk about salted nuts versus unsalted,
which is better?
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Well, I mean, we all know salted is better, but the
healthier option is unsalted.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yeah, and that comes back to personal values.
What do you value most Healthyfood or delicious food?
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
You know, I do, I do know it all comes back to dark
chocolate versus milk chocolate.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Actually, you know what I made this afternoon.
I made Christmas crack.
Have you ever heard of thisbefore?
It's like a layer of saltinecrackers, like premium plus
crackers, with a layer of toffeeand then a layer of melted
chocolate, and then you put itin the fridge and let it harden.
(01:37):
It's called Christmas crack.
I've never made it, but I'venot heard of that.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
I've not heard of that.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
So it's really good, but it's like salted.
It's the perfect mix of saltednuts, because you can actually
sprinkle nuts on top I didn't,but it's like salted toffee
chocolate.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Let me know how that is.
I'm up to try anything, yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
I'm excited.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
I think I mentioned before last summer I had I think
it was whole wheat or nomultigrain toast with peanut
butter with banana with honeyand avocado.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
It was all of that Delicious.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Yeah, I'm not like a big banana person, but if there
was like a bit of banana I'd beokay with it.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Here's what I think about leader vibes.
And if you're watching thevideo edition of the podcast,
you'll see that I have a gianttray of unsalted nuts that I
begrudgingly eating.
Anyways, here's what I thinkabout leader vibes.
They're left over fromChristmas, these nuts.
Anyways, they're profitable,not the nuts, the leader vibes.
(02:52):
The leader vibes are profitable.
If you want to be a coach whoautomatically attracts clients,
you have to have the essence ofa leader about you.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
I believe.
Yes, I agree.
I believe, I believe, yes, youneed that, but I think that's
something you can cultivate.
Do you think that that's justlike you're born with it or not,
or do you think you have to,like you can create it?
I think it's probably both.
I think some people are justnaturally born with it or
naturally have the vibes, andthen others grow into it or
(03:29):
create it or cultivate it.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Yeah, I think it definitely can be cultivated.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
There's zero doubt in my mind that a person wants to.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Oh, you can 100%.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Cultivate a leadership personality.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
You can yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Well, I did, I did it , boom, I did it.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Boom.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yeah, done.
I don't know if I've told thestory before, but when I was in
corporate I was told in prettymuch every review that I had
that I had no presence.
They, the executive, hold hisice.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Geez Hold reviews.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Yeah, the executive team told me on multiple
occasions that I lacked presencewhen I was being passed up for
like promotions and but nobodyever speaking of leader vibes,
nobody ever told me how to goabout cultivating presence
within the firm.
(04:31):
So I was kind of left on my own.
Like they were like you have nopresence, and so then I was
like, okay, well I had.
I was kind of left on my own tofigure it out, which I became
very interested in studyingbecause you know it hurt my
feelings.
They would tell me that Ididn't have presence because I
(04:52):
thought I did.
So, yeah, like I've, I've beenon a mission like pretty much
the rest of my adult lifecultivating presence and
learning leadership.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Orged in fire.
You are.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Man.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Okay, so let's look at me now Look at me, I know.
Look at you now.
I'm a Lenny Kravitz giant scarf.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
And all day running hoodie.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
All day running hoodie.
This is the podcast recordingattire.
I, of course, wearing greenshirt, as I'm known to do.
Okay, let's talk about the fivequalities of a leader.
Somebody who has leader vibeshas these five qualities.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Atlanta wrote this list, I read it and I agree with
it, and I was delighted to benot to be not modest for a
moment to say I'm pretty sureI've got all these traits nailed
down.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Yeah, I think you do, I think I do too.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
I think you do too.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Yeah, I'm feeling I've got the leader vibes.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
You got leader vibes, we got leader vibes, leader
vibes, here on the no Excusescoaching podcast.
Yeah, get some, get some.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Well, we're going to tell you how to get them.
The five ingredients, all right.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Number one is you got to care, ladies and gents and
listeners.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Yeah, yeah, you've got to be, you've got to show
some genuine concern, and Ithink it's important to remember
, like you know what a coach isand why you got into it, and
like you know what the purposebehind being a coach is all
about.
Right, like it's to help people.
Yeah, help people change, helppeople grow, help people figure
(06:45):
themselves out, and so, in orderto do that, you have to care,
like you have to have empathy,you have to listen, you have to
support and guide and hold spaceright For these people.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
That you're working with and if you can't really
show that genuine concern, thenwell, we were talking about this
before we started recording.
But, like, if the words are notcongruent with how that person
makes you feel, then it's like arapport breaker immediately,
(07:24):
Like someone could tell you thatthey care, but if you don't
feel it, then yeah, that's verytrue Caring.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
you must genuinely care about the people that you
want to help.
Yeah, and I think you knowpeople in general are good about
perceiving whether you do ornot.
Right.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
It's rare, but every now and then, you know, I'll
come across a coach to you canjust tell they don't care.
You know they're just herebecause they think it's a way to
make money and like.
There's a lot of jobs wherethat attitude is totally fine,
Right yeah, Like where you justwant to produce a product or do
(08:08):
a skill and be compensated forit, and it's that basic and
foundational.
And that's fine.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Coaching is not that type of product.
You need to actually care aboutthe people you're serving.
It's hyper important.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Yeah, yeah, I mean that is, I would say, like the
backbone of the entire business,because if you don't care, it's
not sustainable.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
So there we go so that's quality number one.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
Yeah, you have weak vibes in the coaching or
hypnotherapy biz.
You have to be able to behonest with yourself and say you
care about the people you'reserving.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
Yeah, cool, okay, good.
So number two is you got to beauthentic.
I think we've had some episodeswhere we, like, made fun of
this word, I think or not madefun of the word, but it is true,
like you do need to be true toyourself and your values and be
(09:07):
honest and be transparent and bereal with your audience, with
the people that you'reinteracting with, like how
you're showing up, becausepeople are inspired by
authenticity.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
And it's also easy, like we were talking about that
whole, like energy is, like it'seasy to identify when someone
isn't being authentic.
And when they're, you know, andwhen they are being authentic
too.
So you know, just understandingyourself and like you know,
like you know, like you're beingyourself and like how are you
(09:47):
living your life and how are youleading yourself and how are
you like showing up in the worldis going to have a huge impact
on your leadership vibes in yourbusiness and when you're
working with people.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Yeah, and you know this is another one where people
can tell.
As Alana said, people can tellif you're being authentic or not
.
If you love what you're doingand you're honest about that, if
you are teaching content oradvocating processes that you
(10:20):
truly believe in, that's a bigright.
Yeah, major.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Yeah, Like if you're a health coach but you like
never drink water or somethinglike that, right Like one of
those anti-water health coachesthat are riding around these
days, but that's just like it'simportant for you to you know,
walk the talk.
Is that what it is?
You walk the walk and talk thetalk right.
(10:45):
So you know like, are you livingout your process?
Are you, you know, practicingwhat you preach?
Because if you have thisingredient in your leader vibe,
then it's going to be so easyfor you to sell your coaching
because you're going to back it110% right and people won't
(11:11):
really need the convincing Like.
This is why like organicmarketing works so well is, if
you're hitting all of these likeleader vibes, then you
shouldn't really have toconvince people about what
you're selling because you're aliving example of it, if you are
being authentic.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
Yeah, it's very true.
The offer that I'm selling rightnow, that I'm offering right
now, it is a business trainingand mentoring program and the
people that are getting on thecalls with me, the enrollment
calls, it's such a natural, warm, organic process to enroll
(11:57):
these folks because the programthat I'm teaching is exactly the
way I run my business right now.
So it's exactly what people havebeen watching me do in my
business and serving others andputting out free value and stuff
and creating a community.
That's exactly what the programis.
So it's very easy for them tolook at what I'm doing and say,
(12:20):
ok, I like that, I like whathe's doing.
Clearly it's working for himand the offer is just come with
me, I'll hold your hand and showyou how to do exactly what I'm
doing.
So there's no convincing,there's no selling, there's no.
You know, there's very fewquestions that even need to be
discussed on these enrollmentcalls, because people already
get it by the time they show upon the call and in order to do
(12:42):
that, you need to be authentic.
Yeah, you must, right.
So it's just an interestingexample that's coming up.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
No.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
I think, that's yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
I think that's perfect because, like, if you,
that's why you know, I thinkthat sales calls are great but
they shouldn't be about.
I think the sales call shouldbe about the person that's
wanting to purchase and likeasking questions and figuring
out like if they're a good fitfor it, rather than you
(13:11):
convincing someone to you know,join your process or join your
program or whatever it is.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Yeah, I agree.
Ok, so we gotta be caring,gotta be authentic.
Number three is a good one.
You must have a visionaryattitude.
Visionary, you have a clearvision and purpose, your forward
thinking, creative and strivefor excellence.
I think that, well, that have.
(13:38):
That are the kind of peoplethat others want to work with.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
Yeah, well, because these, like, when you have that
visionary mindset right, it'salmost kind of like the mission
mindset we were talking aboutlast week, but it's like when
you have vision, like you haveclarity, which a lot of people
are seeking right, and you havepurpose, which is also something
a lot of people are seeking, sothat's like an inspiring,
(14:04):
motivating quality that otherpeople want to like be around
right, Like they want to be inthat type of energy because
you're thinking outside of thebox, maybe you're you're also
thinking about possibilities, soit's a nice energy to be around
because they're they're notgoing to feel judged by you
(14:28):
necessarily, right, like if youhave that lead, those leader
vibes, you're getting on callswith people and coaching them
through things and you'reletting them dream big.
You're letting them like usetheir imagination and you're not
like being critical orjudgmental or squashing their
dreams, you're letting themwonder right.
(14:50):
Which is a great quality to have, and it's something that often
they're.
They're surprised by right,because often their peers or
their parents or theircolleagues are like, oh, you
can't do that because of X, y, z, right, but you get on a call
with a coach who has the leadervibes and they're like, oh wow,
(15:10):
you're listening to me and it'sinspiring and it's exciting, and
like they feel like they'refull of possibility all of a
sudden.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Yeah, very true, very true.
And it's just I mean it's justempowering to work with somebody
who has a strong vision forthemselves, right.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Yeah, totally.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
They're demonstrating at any given moment what it
means to have a goal and movetowards that goal and have a
vision and know the directionthat you're going right.
If you're going to work withsomebody who's helping you
achieve your goals, you want toknow that they're an expert at
achieving their goals right.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Yeah, totally yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
Yeah, okay, cool.
That's number three.
The consummate professional,lana Banks, is wrestling with a
cat on the other side of theZoom call right now and laughing
hysterically at the same time.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
I just can't, because Leguita's got a puppy and so
she doesn't come out much thesedays, so it's just like when she
wants attention I need to giveit to her.
Hey, I'm not objecting.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
I'm just describing what I'm seeing so that the
audience can experience it aswell.
I encourage you to play withthat cat.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Number four on the list.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Number four is being empowering.
Being empowering, you have acollaborative and inclusive
approach to working.
You trust and believe inyourself and the people you work
with.
Yeah, yeah.
You're kind of like theopposite of being viciously
(16:53):
independent, right.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
A lot of newer coaches are hyper reluctant to
delegate.
Don't want to let go of controlof anything going on.
There are a lot of differentreasons for that, but usually
it's not a great thing, right.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
You want those eyes on that?
Wow, they're like googly eyes.
There's a few differentcomponents to being empowering
and to being empowered, and partof it is trusting yourself.
Part of it is trusting that youcan delegate certain things to
other people.
Part of it is trusting yourclients to take action without
(17:32):
your direct supervisionsometimes right, yeah.
Yeah, all kinds of things likethat.
So empowered and empowering,and empowering others.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Yeah.
And I think the key bit to this, too, is really believing in
the people that you're workingwith, because if you're in a
coaching relationship withsomeone and you don't believe in
them, then that is going tohave negative consequences in
your relationship and theirability to achieve whatever it
(18:06):
is that they want, right.
You need to be really good atbelieving in them, and that's
going to start with believing inyourself.
Right.
Believing in trusting yourselfand believing in your coaching
and your abilities is going toinstill trust and belief in your
(18:26):
client.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Yeah, absolutely yeah , agreed.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
That's a good one.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
That's an important one, yeah, super important.
Cool, okay, we got one more.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Resilience, resilience.
Speaker 2 (18:40):
Resilience being resilient.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Yeah, yeah.
Or adaptable right, Likeadapting to I don't know, is
resilience in adapting the exactsame thing?
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I don't think they're the exact same thing, but I
think they're connected.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Yeah, totally connected.
But it's really you know likeyou can pivot.
You can adapt to challengingcircumstances, you can adapt to
setbacks, you can adapt to like.
This makes me think of you'reon a call with someone but
you're bringing all of yourresources together and thinking
(19:16):
like, oh, I can offer this thingand that thing and it's not
necessarily part of a blueprintor something that you're always
following.
You can kind of problem solve.
I remember when I was doing mymaster NLP training, or when I
finished it, ro actually, shesaid to me oh so now you've
(19:41):
learned to cook.
I was like, oh, that's such agood analogy Because it's like
NLP practitioner training, right, is all the kind of like
learning a bunch of techniquesand then the master one is like
mastering those techniques, butthen you know having the
resilience, I guess.
Or like learning how to cookright, like learning how to
(20:02):
piece it all together.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
Yeah, the when I think about resilient and the
importance of being resilient ina coaching no-transcript.
It's that, like, your clientsmay not always yet be super
resilient and they need you tobe right.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
If they're facing challenges that are stirring
them, you need to be unsteeredright.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
And even you know, these days most of my clients
are business owners, which youwould think you know.
To be a business owner, you gotto have a certain degree of
self-esteem, and you know, andthey all do.
But, like you know, you neverknow what sort of emotional
turbulence or emotionalchallenge will present itself on
(20:56):
a seemingly innocuous coachingcall right.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
And so even to be a business coach.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
You know you're routinely going to see people
break down in tears under thestress of running a business.
You're routinely going to seepeople you know who are having a
really hard time in a givenmoment, even if yesterday was
great and tomorrow was going tobe great.
But today is not right and youneed to stand firm and be a rock
in support of that person right, even if, you know, even
(21:25):
considering that things go upand down in your life too and
that's part of being resilient,you know.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
Yeah, that is, and I think too, it's the ability to
have difficult conversationswith your clients too, because I
think sometimes there's thistendency because the first
ingredient is caring, right.
So if you have genuine care andempathy about someone, there is
this tendency to like please,or people please, and, like you
(21:52):
know, let them feel good and leteverything be comfortable,
right.
But this resilience piece, alsowhen you're in the leader vibes
, allows you to have thesedifficult conversations where
it's like you know that theywant to go in this direction,
but in your heart you know thatit would be better if they went
(22:14):
in that direction, but as yourjob, it's not your job to tell
them where to go either.
So you kind of have to havethis like very tough love type
of conversation with clients tooand be able to like, hold it
steady and not be judgementaland not be too people-pleasy,
(22:35):
right, but lead them to makingthe decision that you know is
probably going to be in theirbest interest.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
That's a real interesting line to go down.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
I actually did this week.
I was in a breakthrough withsomeone and like I wanted to go,
like I know I knew they wantedto go in this direction, but I
was like we got to go over hereand it was tough right.
Like it was like I got off thecall and I was like ooh right,
because you just feel likeyou're treading water or you
(23:16):
know for an hour and then.
But the thing is is they willremember that because that's
leader vibes, right there right.
That's why they're spending themoney.
To work with you is not to getthe answer that all their
friends are giving them.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah, yeah, good point.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
You got to give that tough love and that does require
resilience and that emotionalregulation that you're talking
about too.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yeah, very true, very true.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
That's a really good example.
That's a really good example.
Cool, all right yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
So there we go, the five things that you need to
have leader vibes.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Yeah, and if there's a barrier between you and one or
more of these characteristics,I suggest you talk to Alana
Banks about a breakthrough.
Oh really.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
Because here's the secret, folks in my opinion,
it's that everybody has thecapacity to be caring, authentic
, to be a visionary, to beempowering of themselves and
others and to be resilient.
These are sort of inbuilt orfrom birth characteristics.
It's the events of our lifethat kind of build barriers
(24:42):
between us and these qualities.
So an NLE breakthrough processlike the one that Atlanta Banks
is making available now canremove those barriers between
you and these otherwise inbuiltcharacteristics.
So think about that, folks, andmaybe shoot Atlanta a DM to
(25:04):
inquire further.
Speaker 1 (25:06):
Yeah, that would be great.
I'm also going to be hosting aworkshop in February, probably
mid-February all about becomingthe confident coach and how to
create yourself image, to haveleader vibes, actually.
So if a breakthrough isn'tsomething that you're totally on
(25:30):
board with just yet, come to myworkshop.
It'll be a two-hour workshopwhere we workshop your
self-image.
So you're actually going tocome up with your terms and
conditions, like what you'reavailable for, what you're not
available for, and this is areally great checklist, because
I think we actually talked aboutthis maybe last week, but it's
(25:52):
a really great checklist to liveby and make decisions by and
all that kind of stuff, becauseif it's not jiving with your
image, then it's a no.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
It's easy.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
It gives you a ton of clarity and great vision and
purpose too, so look out forthat.
I'll be sharing it on mysocials Facebook and Adalana
Banks coaching.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
Cool.
Yeah, I remember the originalworkshop that this evolved from
and it was exceptional.
So with another little massiveamount of evolution, this next
one, I'm sure is going to beabsolutely yeah, it's going to
be awesome.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Actually I remember after doing that workshop, one
of the women from the group, shedid a whole photo shoot and
updated all of her social mediastuff and I remember her
messaging me after.
She was just like I was soinspired.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Awesome, cool, love that yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
All right, that's going to be it, that's going to
be it.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
So yeah, join the simple social sanctuary.
If you want social media helpfrom me, make sure you're in my
free Facebook group, which iscalled Mission and Movement.
If you can't find it, justshoot me a DM.
There's a link to it in my linktree there on Instagram at Ryan
Montes in LP.
And that's it for now.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
All right, Thanks everyone.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
Bye everyone.
Today.
I thought it would be fun totalk about leadership in the
coaching world, because Ibelieve that you can create
leadership right.
Like people aren't just born tobe a leader, I think that
leadership is something that wecan create and cultivate within
ourselves.
If that's something that wewant to be and to be a coach,
(00:26):
one would think you would haveto be a leader if you're going
to be leading other people.
And if you're also going to bea coach who's leading other
people, you need to be leadingyourself and your own business.
So I think if you're going tobe a good coach, you need to
have leader vibes, and that'swhat I want to talk about today.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
I want to talk about salted nuts versus unsalted,
which is better?
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Well, I mean, we all know salted is better, but the
healthier option is unsalted.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yeah, and that comes back to personal values.
What do you value most Healthyfood or delicious food?
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
You know, I do, I do know it all comes back to dark
chocolate versus milk chocolate.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Actually, you know what I made this afternoon.
I made Christmas crack.
Have you ever heard of thisbefore?
It's like a layer of saltinecrackers, like premium plus
crackers, with a layer of toffeeand then a layer of melted
chocolate, and then you put itin the fridge and let it harden.
(01:37):
It's called Christmas crack.
I've never made it, but I'venot heard of that.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
I've not heard of that.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
So it's really good, but it's like salted.
It's the perfect mix of saltednuts, because you can actually
sprinkle nuts on top I didn't,but it's like salted toffee
chocolate.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Let me know how that is.
I'm up to try anything, yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
I'm excited.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
I think I mentioned before last summer I had I think
it was whole wheat or nomultigrain toast with peanut
butter with banana with honeyand avocado.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
It was all of that Delicious.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
Yeah, I'm not like a big banana person, but if there
was like a bit of banana I'd beokay with it.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Here's what I think about leader vibes.
And if you're watching thevideo edition of the podcast,
you'll see that I have a gianttray of unsalted nuts that I
begrudgingly eating.
Anyways, here's what I thinkabout leader vibes.
They're left over fromChristmas, these nuts.
Anyways, they're profitable,not the nuts, the leader vibes.
(02:52):
The leader vibes are profitable.
If you want to be a coach whoautomatically attracts clients,
you have to have the essence ofa leader about you.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
I believe.
Yes, I agree.
I believe, I believe, yes, youneed that, but I think that's
something you can cultivate.
Do you think that that's justlike you're born with it or not,
or do you think you have to,like you can create it?
I think it's probably both.
I think some people are justnaturally born with it or
naturally have the vibes, andthen others grow into it or
(03:29):
create it or cultivate it.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Yeah, I think it definitely can be cultivated.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
There's zero doubt in my mind that a person wants to.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Oh, you can 100%.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Cultivate a leadership personality.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
You can yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Well, I did, I did it , boom, I did it.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Boom.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yeah, done.
I don't know if I've told thestory before, but when I was in
corporate I was told in prettymuch every review that I had
that I had no presence.
They, the executive, hold hisice.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Geez Hold reviews.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Yeah, the executive team told me on multiple
occasions that I lacked presencewhen I was being passed up for
like promotions and but nobodyever speaking of leader vibes,
nobody ever told me how to goabout cultivating presence
within the firm.
(04:31):
So I was kind of left on my own.
Like they were like you have nopresence, and so then I was
like, okay, well I had.
I was kind of left on my own tofigure it out, which I became
very interested in studyingbecause you know it hurt my
feelings.
They would tell me that Ididn't have presence because I
(04:52):
thought I did.
So, yeah, like I've, I've beenon a mission like pretty much
the rest of my adult lifecultivating presence and
learning leadership.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Orged in fire.
You are.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Man.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Okay, so let's look at me now Look at me, I know.
Look at you now.
I'm a Lenny Kravitz giant scarf.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
And all day running hoodie.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
All day running hoodie.
This is the podcast recordingattire.
I, of course, wearing greenshirt, as I'm known to do.
Okay, let's talk about the fivequalities of a leader.
Somebody who has leader vibeshas these five qualities.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Atlanta wrote this list, I read it and I agree with
it, and I was delighted to benot to be not modest for a
moment to say I'm pretty sureI've got all these traits nailed
down.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Yeah, I think you do, I think I do too.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
I think you do too.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Yeah, I'm feeling I've got the leader vibes.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
You got leader vibes, we got leader vibes, leader
vibes, here on the no Excusescoaching podcast.
Yeah, get some, get some.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Well, we're going to tell you how to get them.
The five ingredients, all right.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Number one is you got to care, ladies and gents and
listeners.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Yeah, yeah, you've got to be, you've got to show
some genuine concern, and Ithink it's important to remember
, like you know what a coach isand why you got into it, and
like you know what the purposebehind being a coach is all
about.
Right, like it's to help people.
Yeah, help people change, helppeople grow, help people figure
(06:45):
themselves out, and so, in orderto do that, you have to care,
like you have to have empathy,you have to listen, you have to
support and guide and hold spaceright For these people.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
That you're working with and if you can't really
show that genuine concern, thenwell, we were talking about this
before we started recording.
But, like, if the words are notcongruent with how that person
makes you feel, then it's like arapport breaker immediately,
(07:24):
Like someone could tell you thatthey care, but if you don't
feel it, then yeah, that's verytrue Caring.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
you must genuinely care about the people that you
want to help.
Yeah, and I think you knowpeople in general are good about
perceiving whether you do ornot.
Right.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
It's rare, but every now and then, you know, I'll
come across a coach to you canjust tell they don't care.
You know they're just herebecause they think it's a way to
make money and like.
There's a lot of jobs wherethat attitude is totally fine,
Right yeah, Like where you justwant to produce a product or do
(08:08):
a skill and be compensated forit, and it's that basic and
foundational.
And that's fine.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Coaching is not that type of product.
You need to actually care aboutthe people you're serving.
It's hyper important.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Yeah, yeah, I mean that is, I would say, like the
backbone of the entire business,because if you don't care, it's
not sustainable.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
So there we go so that's quality number one.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
Yeah, you have weak vibes in the coaching or
hypnotherapy biz.
You have to be able to behonest with yourself and say you
care about the people you'reserving.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
Yeah, cool, okay, good.
So number two is you got to beauthentic.
I think we've had some episodeswhere we, like, made fun of
this word, I think or not madefun of the word, but it is true,
like you do need to be true toyourself and your values and be
(09:07):
honest and be transparent and bereal with your audience, with
the people that you'reinteracting with, like how
you're showing up, becausepeople are inspired by
authenticity.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
And it's also easy, like we were talking about that
whole, like energy is, like it'seasy to identify when someone
isn't being authentic.
And when they're, you know, andwhen they are being authentic
too.
So you know, just understandingyourself and like you know,
like you know, like you're beingyourself and like how are you
(09:47):
living your life and how are youleading yourself and how are
you like showing up in the worldis going to have a huge impact
on your leadership vibes in yourbusiness and when you're
working with people.
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Yeah, and you know this is another one where people
can tell.
As Alana said, people can tellif you're being authentic or not
.
If you love what you're doingand you're honest about that, if
you are teaching content oradvocating processes that you
(10:20):
truly believe in, that's a bigright.
Yeah, major.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Yeah, Like if you're a health coach but you like
never drink water or somethinglike that, right Like one of
those anti-water health coachesthat are riding around these
days, but that's just like it'simportant for you to you know,
walk the talk.
Is that what it is?
You walk the walk and talk thetalk right.
(10:45):
So you know like, are you livingout your process?
Are you, you know, practicingwhat you preach?
Because if you have thisingredient in your leader vibe,
then it's going to be so easyfor you to sell your coaching
because you're going to back it110% right and people won't
(11:11):
really need the convincing Like.
This is why like organicmarketing works so well is, if
you're hitting all of these likeleader vibes, then you
shouldn't really have toconvince people about what
you're selling because you're aliving example of it, if you are
being authentic.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
Yeah, it's very true.
The offer that I'm selling rightnow, that I'm offering right
now, it is a business trainingand mentoring program and the
people that are getting on thecalls with me, the enrollment
calls, it's such a natural, warm, organic process to enroll
(11:57):
these folks because the programthat I'm teaching is exactly the
way I run my business right now.
So it's exactly what people havebeen watching me do in my
business and serving others andputting out free value and stuff
and creating a community.
That's exactly what the programis.
So it's very easy for them tolook at what I'm doing and say,
(12:20):
ok, I like that, I like whathe's doing.
Clearly it's working for himand the offer is just come with
me, I'll hold your hand and showyou how to do exactly what I'm
doing.
So there's no convincing,there's no selling, there's no.
You know, there's very fewquestions that even need to be
discussed on these enrollmentcalls, because people already
get it by the time they show upon the call and in order to do
(12:42):
that, you need to be authentic.
Yeah, you must, right.
So it's just an interestingexample that's coming up.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
No.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
I think, that's yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
I think that's perfect because, like, if you,
that's why you know, I thinkthat sales calls are great but
they shouldn't be about.
I think the sales call shouldbe about the person that's
wanting to purchase and likeasking questions and figuring
out like if they're a good fitfor it, rather than you
(13:11):
convincing someone to you know,join your process or join your
program or whatever it is.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Yeah, I agree.
Ok, so we gotta be caring,gotta be authentic.
Number three is a good one.
You must have a visionaryattitude.
Visionary, you have a clearvision and purpose, your forward
thinking, creative and strivefor excellence.
I think that, well, that have.
(13:38):
That are the kind of peoplethat others want to work with.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
Yeah, well, because these, like, when you have that
visionary mindset right, it'salmost kind of like the mission
mindset we were talking aboutlast week, but it's like when
you have vision, like you haveclarity, which a lot of people
are seeking right, and you havepurpose, which is also something
a lot of people are seeking, sothat's like an inspiring,
(14:04):
motivating quality that otherpeople want to like be around
right, Like they want to be inthat type of energy because
you're thinking outside of thebox, maybe you're you're also
thinking about possibilities, soit's a nice energy to be around
because they're they're notgoing to feel judged by you
(14:28):
necessarily, right, like if youhave that lead, those leader
vibes, you're getting on callswith people and coaching them
through things and you'reletting them dream big.
You're letting them like usetheir imagination and you're not
like being critical orjudgmental or squashing their
dreams, you're letting themwonder right.
(14:50):
Which is a great quality to have, and it's something that often
they're.
They're surprised by right,because often their peers or
their parents or theircolleagues are like, oh, you
can't do that because of X, y, z, right, but you get on a call
with a coach who has the leadervibes and they're like, oh wow,
(15:10):
you're listening to me and it'sinspiring and it's exciting, and
like they feel like they'refull of possibility all of a
sudden.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Yeah, very true, very true.
And it's just I mean it's justempowering to work with somebody
who has a strong vision forthemselves, right.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Yeah, totally.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
They're demonstrating at any given moment what it
means to have a goal and movetowards that goal and have a
vision and know the directionthat you're going right.
If you're going to work withsomebody who's helping you
achieve your goals, you want toknow that they're an expert at
achieving their goals right.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Yeah, totally yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
Yeah, okay, cool.
That's number three.
The consummate professional,lana Banks, is wrestling with a
cat on the other side of theZoom call right now and laughing
hysterically at the same time.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
I just can't, because Leguita's got a puppy and so
she doesn't come out much thesedays, so it's just like when she
wants attention I need to giveit to her.
Hey, I'm not objecting.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
I'm just describing what I'm seeing so that the
audience can experience it aswell.
I encourage you to play withthat cat.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Number four on the list.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Number four is being empowering.
Being empowering, you have acollaborative and inclusive
approach to working.
You trust and believe inyourself and the people you work
with.
Yeah, yeah.
You're kind of like theopposite of being viciously
(16:53):
independent, right.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
A lot of newer coaches are hyper reluctant to
delegate.
Don't want to let go of controlof anything going on.
There are a lot of differentreasons for that, but usually
it's not a great thing, right.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
You want those eyes on that?
Wow, they're like googly eyes.
There's a few differentcomponents to being empowering
and to being empowered, and partof it is trusting yourself.
Part of it is trusting that youcan delegate certain things to
other people.
Part of it is trusting yourclients to take action without
(17:32):
your direct supervisionsometimes right, yeah.
Yeah, all kinds of things likethat.
So empowered and empowering,and empowering others.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
Yeah.
And I think the key bit to this, too, is really believing in
the people that you're workingwith, because if you're in a
coaching relationship withsomeone and you don't believe in
them, then that is going tohave negative consequences in
your relationship and theirability to achieve whatever it
(18:06):
is that they want, right.
You need to be really good atbelieving in them, and that's
going to start with believing inyourself.
Right.
Believing in trusting yourselfand believing in your coaching
and your abilities is going toinstill trust and belief in your
(18:26):
client.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Yeah, absolutely yeah , agreed.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
That's a good one.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
That's an important one, yeah, super important.
Cool, okay, we got one more.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Resilience, resilience.
Speaker 2 (18:40):
Resilience being resilient.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Yeah, yeah.
Or adaptable right, Likeadapting to I don't know, is
resilience in adapting the exactsame thing?
Speaker 2 (18:51):
I don't think they're the exact same thing, but I
think they're connected.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Yeah, totally connected.
But it's really you know likeyou can pivot.
You can adapt to challengingcircumstances, you can adapt to
setbacks, you can adapt to like.
This makes me think of you'reon a call with someone but
you're bringing all of yourresources together and thinking
(19:16):
like, oh, I can offer this thingand that thing and it's not
necessarily part of a blueprintor something that you're always
following.
You can kind of problem solve.
I remember when I was doing mymaster NLP training, or when I
finished it, ro actually, shesaid to me oh so now you've
(19:41):
learned to cook.
I was like, oh, that's such agood analogy Because it's like
NLP practitioner training, right, is all the kind of like
learning a bunch of techniquesand then the master one is like
mastering those techniques, butthen you know having the
resilience, I guess.
Or like learning how to cookright, like learning how to
(20:02):
piece it all together.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
Yeah, the when I think about resilient and the
importance of being resilient ina coaching no-transcript.
It's that, like, your clientsmay not always yet be super
resilient and they need you tobe right.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
If they're facing challenges that are stirring
them, you need to be unsteeredright.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
And even you know, these days most of my clients
are business owners, which youwould think you know.
To be a business owner, you gotto have a certain degree of
self-esteem, and you know, andthey all do.
But, like you know, you neverknow what sort of emotional
turbulence or emotionalchallenge will present itself on
(20:56):
a seemingly innocuous coachingcall right.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
And so even to be a business coach.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
You know you're routinely going to see people
break down in tears under thestress of running a business.
You're routinely going to seepeople you know who are having a
really hard time in a givenmoment, even if yesterday was
great and tomorrow was going tobe great.
But today is not right and youneed to stand firm and be a rock
in support of that person right, even if, you know, even
(21:25):
considering that things go upand down in your life too and
that's part of being resilient,you know.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
Yeah, that is, and I think too, it's the ability to
have difficult conversationswith your clients too, because I
think sometimes there's thistendency because the first
ingredient is caring, right.
So if you have genuine care andempathy about someone, there is
this tendency to like please,or people please, and, like you
(21:52):
know, let them feel good and leteverything be comfortable,
right.
But this resilience piece, alsowhen you're in the leader vibes
, allows you to have thesedifficult conversations where
it's like you know that theywant to go in this direction,
but in your heart you know thatit would be better if they went
(22:14):
in that direction, but as yourjob, it's not your job to tell
them where to go either.
So you kind of have to havethis like very tough love type
of conversation with clients tooand be able to like, hold it
steady and not be judgementaland not be too people-pleasy,
(22:35):
right, but lead them to makingthe decision that you know is
probably going to be in theirbest interest.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
That's a real interesting line to go down.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
I actually did this week.
I was in a breakthrough withsomeone and like I wanted to go,
like I know I knew they wantedto go in this direction, but I
was like we got to go over hereand it was tough right.
Like it was like I got off thecall and I was like ooh right,
because you just feel likeyou're treading water or you
(23:16):
know for an hour and then.
But the thing is is they willremember that because that's
leader vibes, right there right.
That's why they're spending themoney.
To work with you is not to getthe answer that all their
friends are giving them.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah, yeah, good point.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
You got to give that tough love and that does require
resilience and that emotionalregulation that you're talking
about too.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Yeah, very true, very true.
Speaker 1 (23:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
That's a really good example.
That's a really good example.
Cool, all right yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
So there we go, the five things that you need to
have leader vibes.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Yeah, and if there's a barrier between you and one or
more of these characteristics,I suggest you talk to Alana
Banks about a breakthrough.
Oh really.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
Because here's the secret, folks in my opinion,
it's that everybody has thecapacity to be caring, authentic
, to be a visionary, to beempowering of themselves and
others and to be resilient.
These are sort of inbuilt orfrom birth characteristics.
It's the events of our lifethat kind of build barriers
(24:42):
between us and these qualities.
So an NLE breakthrough processlike the one that Atlanta Banks
is making available now canremove those barriers between
you and these otherwise inbuiltcharacteristics.
So think about that, folks, andmaybe shoot Atlanta a DM to
(25:04):
inquire further.
Speaker 1 (25:06):
Yeah, that would be great.
I'm also going to be hosting aworkshop in February, probably
mid-February all about becomingthe confident coach and how to
create yourself image, to haveleader vibes, actually.
So if a breakthrough isn'tsomething that you're totally on
(25:30):
board with just yet, come to myworkshop.
It'll be a two-hour workshopwhere we workshop your
self-image.
So you're actually going tocome up with your terms and
conditions, like what you'reavailable for, what you're not
available for, and this is areally great checklist, because
I think we actually talked aboutthis maybe last week, but it's
(25:52):
a really great checklist to liveby and make decisions by and
all that kind of stuff, becauseif it's not jiving with your
image, then it's a no.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
It's easy.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
It gives you a ton of clarity and great vision and
purpose too, so look out forthat.
I'll be sharing it on mysocials Facebook and Adalana
Banks coaching.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
Cool.
Yeah, I remember the originalworkshop that this evolved from
and it was exceptional.
So with another little massiveamount of evolution, this next
one, I'm sure is going to beabsolutely yeah, it's going to
be awesome.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Actually I remember after doing that workshop, one
of the women from the group, shedid a whole photo shoot and
updated all of her social mediastuff and I remember her
messaging me after.
She was just like I was soinspired.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Awesome, cool, love that yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
All right, that's going to be it, that's going to
be it.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
So yeah, join the simple social sanctuary.
If you want social media helpfrom me, make sure you're in my
free Facebook group, which iscalled Mission and Movement.
If you can't find it, justshoot me a DM.
There's a link to it in my linktree there on Instagram at Ryan
Montes in LP.
And that's it for now.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
All right, Thanks everyone.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
Bye everyone.
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