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October 6, 2025 57 mins

DISCLAIMER: This episode contains content that may be distressing for some listeners. Please take care while listening. 

The siren is silent, the room is calm, and the heart is racing anyway. That’s where our conversation with former firefighter–paramedic Christy Warren begins—inside the strange quiet before chaos and the laser focus that follows once the job lands in your lap.

Across twenty-five years in busy California systems, Christy moved from ambulance to engine to captain, making ten-second front-yard assessments and leading crews through flashover flats, freeway pile-ups, and the awkward, exhausting reality of lifts that manual-handling posters never imagined. She explains why first responders frame calls as tasks, not heroics—cut the roof, force the door, find water—because it’s the only way to think clearly when seconds matter. We go inside station life too: the dry humour that keeps people human, the constant cortisol even during a film at 9pm, and the everyday rituals that get interrupted by someone else’s worst day.

Then the story turns. Christy revisits a children’s house fire where triage collided with scarcity and, years later, the penthouse search that “broke the box” she’d been stuffing full of hard calls. She speaks bluntly about nightmares, intrusive images, rage, and the morning she planned to drive into a tree. What changed the trajectory? Admitting the truth, going off on workers’ comp, and finding a peer community at a six-day retreat where firefighters, medics, cops, and dispatchers speak the same language. EMDR began to work. Shame loosened. The nervous system found a way back to baseline.

We also dig into culture change: how “suck it up” is slowly being replaced by debriefs, peer teams, and early intervention that treats psychological injuries like line-of-duty injuries. Christy shares why she’d choose the career again without hesitation, even as she lives with a body mapped by surgeries, and how the work reshaped her view of fragility, poverty, and resilience.


Christy's Website - https://www.christyewarren.com/

Her Book, "Flashpoint" - https://www.amazon.com/Flash-Point-Firefighters-Journey-Through/dp/1647424488/ref=sr_1_1?crid=UGYTTSWXHTGE&keywords=flash+point+christy+warren&qid=1675272624&sprefix=flash+point+chri%2Caps%2C88&sr=8-1

Her podcast -  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-firefighter-deconstructed/id1500483348

Other links:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/christy-warren-17a978186/

https://www.instagram.com/ffdeconstructed/?hl=en

If you were affected by the content of this episode, please click the link below, or similar links in your country. 

https://988lifeline.org/ 


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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:01):
One moment, you're drinking coffee at the station.
And the next, you're staring ata burning house making split
second decisions.
Decisions that carry the weightof life and death.

SPEAKER_03 (00:14):
It's like you sit around the station waiting for
somebody's worst day of theirlife, and then you're just like
plunged into just absolute chaosand insanity.

SPEAKER_00 (00:24):
For 25 years, Christine Warren was a
firefighter paramedic.
Her world was adrenaline,urgency, and solving impossible
problems under pressure.

SPEAKER_03 (00:35):
Well, we're just plunged into that.
You know, they talk about likethe being in the flow state or
whatever.
It's like bliss.
I mean, it's the high from itafterwards is just tremendous.

SPEAKER_00 (00:46):
But every rush has its cost.
Behind the calls, the rescues,and the adrenaline highs, there
were moments that Christy justcouldn't leave behind.

SPEAKER_03 (00:54):
I mean, we saw horrible, horrible, horrible
things.
I went to put this guy in thatbox, and there was no more room.
Like that box had been full.
Like it kind of like boxpressurized and blew up all over
everything.
And that's really where Istarted to struggle.

SPEAKER_00 (01:16):
Hello and welcome to another episode of No Ordinary
Monday.
Thank you so much for joiningus.
I am your host, Chris Barron,and each week I sit down with a
guest whose job is far fromordinary.
We explore how they got there,what it's really like behind the
scenes, and then I ask them torelive the single most
unforgettable experience oftheir career.

(01:37):
Now, if you enjoy the show, makesure to follow or subscribe.
That way you won't miss out onany of the incredible guests we
have lined up for you.
Just a very quick note before webegin: this week's episode does
contain descriptions oftraumatic events, PTSD, suicidal
thoughts, and mental healthstruggles that some listeners
may find distressing, so pleasetake care while listening.

(02:00):
My guest today has spent morethan two decades on the front
lines of chaos.
As a firefighter and paramedicin California, Christy Warren
raced into burning buildings,cut crash victims free of
mangled cars, and carried peoplethrough the worst days of their
lives.
But the job that gave heradrenaline and purpose also took

(02:20):
a toll.
After years of service, she wasforced to confront the hidden
costs that many first respondersexperienced.
PTSD.
And her journey throughbreaking, healing, and recovery
is as powerful as any rescueshe's ever made.
And as you heard in thatopening, her big story takes us
back inside the scene of atraumatic fire, where the weight

(02:42):
of a single call finally tippedthe balance and changed her life
forever.
So step back as we explore whatit takes to build a career in
fire and rescue and what itmeans to come out the other
side.
You're listening to No OrdinaryMonday?
Let's get into the show.

(03:04):
Christy Warren, how are youdoing?

SPEAKER_03 (03:07):
Chris Barron, I'm good.
How are you?

SPEAKER_00 (03:10):
Fantastic.
Thank you so much for uh jumpingon the podcast.
How are you doing today?

SPEAKER_03 (03:15):
Oh, thank you so much for having me.
I'm super honored.
I'm doing real well.
I'm doing really well.
Thanks.

SPEAKER_00 (03:20):
I guess uh things are a lot calmer now than maybe
they were 10 or 15 years ago ina morning like this.

SPEAKER_03 (03:27):
Yes, things are much calmer now.
Almost to the point where I'm Istruggle with boredom and and
missing uh the the crazinessthat ensued.

SPEAKER_00 (03:37):
Yeah, absolutely.
Well, I mean I mean I I think weshould probably just go back and
just explain w I mean how what'sthe best way that you would
describe the career that you hadfor you know like 30 years or
whatever it was?
How young best described it?

SPEAKER_03 (03:53):
It was 25 years.
It was um it was incredibleboredom pierced by like moments
of insanity.
You know, it's kind of funnybecause I mean when you think
about it, we you know, webasically, you know, as a
firefighter, it's like you sitaround the station waiting for
somebody's house to catch onfire, or waiting for, you know,

(04:14):
somebody to get hit by a car, orwaiting for, you know, just some
somebody else's like worst dayof their life.
And uh and so it can it can betremendously boring at times,
and then it it can just beyou're just like plunged into
just absolute chaos andinsanity.
And um but it was it was thebest it was the best job in the

(04:38):
world.
I just can't even begin to uh todescribe what a great job it was
and how much I enjoyed it.
And you know, go going on calls,you know, especially like
critical ones, it just like youfind this clarity, or I found
this clarity that I can't seemto find in anything else that
I've done.
You know, they talk about likethe f being in the flow state or

(05:00):
whatever, and it's like that'swhere uh at least for me and I
think a lot of us firstresponders, like that's where we
we do our best and we're at ourbest.
Like none of us are good plannerplanners.
I think m pretty much all of ushave ADHD.
And um when we're just yeah,plunged into that, it's it's
it's like bliss.

(05:21):
I mean, it's it's the high fromit afterwards is just
tremendous.
I mean, we saw horrible,horrible, horrible things, but
the call itself was uh it wasjust tremendously gratifying.

SPEAKER_00 (05:34):
It is such a it's such a paradoxical like job to
do.
You know, of all the jobs youcan do, like you say, you know,
you're seeing people on theworst day of their lives often.
But like I guess if if you havea call that th that you do save
someone's life or you do savesomeone on the worst day of
their life, you come out of itfeeling I mean, would you

(05:55):
describe it as euphoric or orwhat is that sort of feeling?

SPEAKER_03 (05:59):
Um you know, it's kind of interesting when you you
know you talk about like savingsomebody's life.
It's like we uh it's like it itdoesn't happen very often where
you like save somebody's lifelike right in front of you.
And I think it's really youknow, we really it's more about
like getting the job done thanlike looking at it as saving

(06:21):
their life, if that makes anysense.
Because I think if you look atit if you really look at it as p
as somebody's life in your hand,like at the moment, then it'd be
just too hard.
You know what I mean?
It'd be really overwhelming.
So it's really about the job.
Yeah, it's about getting, youknow, it's about uh getting a
car door open or getting a carthe roof of the car cut off so

(06:41):
we can get the person out.
So it's really about our taskand doing our tasks really well.

SPEAKER_00 (06:46):
It's interesting just the way that you know you
frame that in your head, andmaybe you and your colleagues
think about it the same way.
It's like I'm just doing I'vejust solved a problem.
You know, I just did this thingand I just went to the next
thing.
Um yeah, it it's a fascinatingmindset to the problem.
That's exactly right.
Yeah.
Um but I guess it's aboutsolving a problem.

SPEAKER_03 (07:04):
Like you hit the nail on the head.
Like we have to we have to solvethese problems very quickly and
with very little informationtoo.
You know, like if I pull up on afire and I'm you know first in
and I'm the captain and I I needit's like I have to make all
these decisions on how we'regonna attack this fire, where
I'm gonna get my water from, allthis kind of stuff.
And I'm just by pulling up infront of the house and looking

(07:26):
at it, you know, I I have like10 seconds to make an assessment
and then make a flurry ofdecisions that could meet could
mean life or death at the time.
I don't think about it at thattime.
I just think about like, okay,like you say, the task and
solving the problem.
And so um, so it's kind of likeI think that's kind of where the
rush comes from is having to doan a lot of things that are very

(07:51):
high stakes with very littleinformation and in a very short
amount of time.

SPEAKER_00 (07:57):
I mean, let's just go back.
I mean, I'd love to sort of umjust give listeners like a big a
bit of a snapshot of like yourcareer to an extent.
It's kind of split into sort oftwo main first responder
categories, isn't it?
And just walk us through that.

SPEAKER_03 (08:11):
Yeah, so I I originally wanted to be a doctor
and um and I thought it'd be funfor a summer to like get a job
on an ambulance.
And uh you know what I mean,like I've always was like the
person who like saw an ambulancego by or a fire engine go by and
was just like mesmerized.
And I watched uh the show calledEmergency, which um was a pretty

(08:35):
big show in the 70s, and uh itwas about two firefighter
paramedics, and I it was justlike my favorite show in the
world, and I it's like I alwaysin the back of my head I always
wanted to be a firefighter, butat the time I never saw a woman
firefighter, so I and I neverthought it was like that it was
possible that I could do it.
Yeah, but anyway, so uh I got ajob on the ambulance and I

(08:57):
worked in this city calledVallejo, which uh is a pretty
violent city, and um so we werevery, very busy on lots and lots
of trauma.
We had lots of freeways andhighways too that intersect
through the city, and so wow umI had the time in my life, like
I was good at it, I loved it,and so I said, forget being a

(09:19):
doctor, like I want to do this,and so uh I went to paramedic
schools and uh got my paramediclicense, and so I worked in
Vallejo as a paramedic for uhseven years, something like
that, and really had the time inmy life, and um and then I saw
that I kind of wanted somethingmore, and I uh and I also really

(09:40):
wanted to be a firefighter, likeI saw what they did, and I
really wanted to do that.
You know, I've always beenathletic and play sports, and
and so like that whole physicalpart of that just really um
enticed me.
So I started testing for firedepartments, and so I first got
hired at uh a small departmentin the Bay Area in California,

(10:00):
and um yeah, I was just smitten.
And then I I wanted to work forlike a busier, kind of more
inner city department, andthat's when I uh got hired at
Berkeley, California.
And so then I was a paramedicfirefighter for the rest of my
career.
And I had all the positions Iwas like I said, I was a
paramedic there, I was afirefighter, I was a driver, so

(10:21):
I drove the fire engine forseveral years, and then I uh
promoted to captain, and so thecaptain makes all the decisions
on the engine, and um it's a lotof responsibility, and I'm not
patting myself on the back inany shape or form, but the but
the job itself, like you just Imean, you have you have you're
the one that makes all thosedecisions under pressure, and

(10:41):
you also have your crew's lifeat stake, and you have you know
the citizens' lives at stake, sothere's there's a lot on your
back.
But uh so yeah, so I do I I dida total of uh 25 years working
in pretty busy systems.

SPEAKER_00 (10:56):
That's amazing.
I also interviewed anotherparamedic in the show, and that
you know, while the sort oflife-saving aspect of it was
like you know, an importantpart, it was like the adrenaline
of the entire thing was thedraw.
You know, it was like, you know,it's exciting.

SPEAKER_03 (11:12):
Yeah, when people, you know, ask all right, you
know, like if you ask them likewhy do you want to be a
firefighter, and they say tohelp people, and it's like,
yeah, okay, that's that's notwhy you became a firefighter,
like that's not that's not it.
You know, there's there'sthere's a million ways to help
people, you know, to to be aservice of people.
And uh so yeah, there's way moreto it than that.

SPEAKER_00 (11:34):
And what's it like?
I mean, we always love goingbehind the scenes on jobs on
this on this podcast, and andwhat is it like behind the
scenes?
You kind of said at thebeginning it was like, you know,
extreme boredom intersected withextreme chaos, but like, you
know, kind of break those twosides of the job down a little
bit more and and give us a alook at that.

SPEAKER_03 (11:55):
So yeah, so you know, we work 24 or 48 hour
shifts, kind of depending onwhat department you work for.
You know, we usually have alittle sh meeting with the crew
about what's happening for theday.
We might have training or youmight have to go do fire
inspections, and um, you know,we have to go shopping for lunch
and for dinner, and and so likeyou have the you have kind of

(12:18):
this like monotonous day plannedout, whether it's training and
like I said, all those otherthings.
But always in the back of yourmind, like at any any second,
like you have to be ready to go,you have to be ready to drop
everything and um and go, youknow, to insanity.
And they actually I read somestudy where they were doing uh
testing for cortisol levels infirefighters, and they found

(12:40):
that even when they're sittingin the recliner watching a
movie, eating ice cream, youknow, like at nine o'clock at
night, their cortisol levelswere through the roof because
you still it's like you're on.
So even like it if you work foran apartment or you're at a
station that's like relativelyslow and you don't run a lot of
calls, like your your body isstill just being hammered, your

(13:01):
nervous system is still beinghammered, you know, all the
time.
So um, yeah, and then you know,you alluded to having fun.
It's like we absolutely you likeyou have to have fun.
And I think firefighters aresome of the funniest people in
the world, and um you know, wedo mild-mandered pranks on each

(13:23):
other.
Um, you know, we we laugh a lot,we give each other a hard time.
Like you have to have somepretty thick skin to be a
firefighter.
And uh yeah, we give each othera ton of crap.
Like if you if you t letsomebody know that you hate
broccoli, it's like guess whatyou're eating for dinner every
single night, and um, whoeverthe chef of the night is are

(13:45):
gonna be making broccoli everysingle night.
So just you know, it's just goodfun.
You like good fun.

SPEAKER_00 (13:51):
And I guess the other the other big thing with
yourself is obviously you weregoing into I mean, transitioning
from being a paramedic, you werethen moving into being a
firefighter, and you were awoman moving into a heavily
male-dominated.
I mean, it's not justmale-dominated in the sense of
like, I don't know, at that timelike many careers were
male-dominated, but this is likea sort of almost physically, you

(14:15):
know, it's almost like only mencan do this job because
physiologically, how could awoman do it?
And how did you how did younavigate that?
That must have been, you know,you had to have so much
determination to to push throughall that kind of nonsense.

SPEAKER_03 (14:30):
Yeah, you you really do.
You know, like being a woman,it's like I had to work twice as
hard to get like half the amountof respect.
And you know, I really went intoit with a attitude of like I'm
not gonna tell anybody that Ican do this job, I'm just gonna
show them I can do this job.
I'm just gonna do it and nottalk about it.
And um, I'm like, I'm nevergonna say like uh I demand your

(14:54):
respect just because I'm awoman.
I was just like, no, I'm justlike everybody else, and you
know, I never wanted to betreated any differently.
And and you know, I also lookfrom the fact that like a man's
tre uh a trepidation with awoman, you know, I'm five foot
six, I'm 150 pounds, you know,seeing me walk through the front
door, their trepidation is is uhis I think legitimate.

(15:15):
Like if you know, if I'm sixfoot two and I'm 250 pounds and
I go down in a fire, I'm gonnasay, is this short little lady
gonna be able to pull me out?
But when it comes time to crawlthrough a window, like I'm gonna
be the one that crawls throughthe window because they're not
gonna fit through the window.
Like I crawled in all everyattic there was to crawl through
or crawl space under a house, itwas I was the one that was sent,

(15:38):
you know, I was the one thatwent through all the windows,
all that kind of stuff.
And so, you know, it takes itreally takes all shapes and
sizes, you know, to do the job.
And so, um, so yeah, that'sreally the the attitude that I
went in there and and I feltlike I I think I earned every
people's respect.
And I I was never treatedpoorly.
I mean I had people say, Yeah, Idon't believe think women belong

(16:00):
here, but um yeah, I wasfortunate in that I was never
treated poorly.

SPEAKER_00 (16:06):
Yeah, yeah.
I mean you alluded to some ofthe the sort of things that you
had to do there, you know,crawling through windows, and
I'm sure in a fire, you know, uhin a building on fire, you got
lots of like debris falling,places to crawl through.
I mean, w what kind of you knowexperiences can you recount um
that sort of stick out in yourmind of of you being you know d

(16:29):
doing what people mightvisualize a firefighter doing?

SPEAKER_03 (16:36):
Well, um just to visualize it, like we wear a lot
of gear.
Um it's a very hot and sweatyjob.
And uh you very you the otherthing too is like there's very
little that we do that'sergonomically correct.
You know, like um you like justlift like you know, so when

(16:56):
people are like having a majorheart attack, like one of the
things that happens with theirnervous system is um like they
feel like they need to go to thebathroom.
So a lot of times when you findpatients who are having a big
heart attack, you find them inthe bathroom and they're really
sweaty just because of theirheart attack, and they tend to
fall behind the toilet, like andso like picking up 300-pound

(17:17):
person who is soaking wet and isfalling between the wall and the
toilet, like you there's noergonomically way to do that.
Yeah, and so um it's just uhyeah, it's just really
physically demanding and um youknow, like we have our chainsaws
like come with warning labels,like do not use this above your
head, and don't use and it'slike we have to use we use

(17:39):
chainsaws all the time, and youknow what I mean in every manner
possible and above our head andreaching really far and standing
on a you know pitchedthree-store a roof on a
three-story building that's gota pretty good pitch to it, you
know, trying to cut open a roofand and uh so yeah, there's we
just it's just it's it's prettycrazy what we we do.

SPEAKER_00 (18:03):
Yeah.
I I just I keep thinking of likeyou know, all the like the
occupational health and safetystandards of like working in a
factory and lifting like heavyloads, like straight back and
and and all that kind of stuff,which can never apply to the
situations that you foundyourself in.
I'm sure you've got likecolleagues in yourself probably
with like all kinds of injuries,you know, like you know, slip

(18:25):
discs and stuff from likelifting people out of as you
say, like 300-pound people outof an awkward position.
It must do all kinds of damageto your body.

SPEAKER_03 (18:36):
It it it's I'm like speechless.
Uh it's unbelievably damaging toyour body.
Like I I had no idea that it wasgonna do like my orthopedic
surgeon calls me his annuitybecause I'm in there so much.
And um and it's not just me,like I all my I worked with a

(18:58):
guy who was just he was amazing.
He's like a physical specimen.
He was so strong, like naturallystrong and well built.
And he was a guy that I thoughtwould never, you know, and he
ended up like m having startinghaving knee problems, which and
hip problems and back problems,like and he had to retire out on
it, not because not on a serviceretirement, but he had to retire

(19:20):
out because of his injuries.
Wow.
Like we it's it's phenomenalwhat it does to your body.
Like I I I've had I think nineorthopedic injuries and or
surgeries, and now I'm like mynext one that's coming up is I
need I have to have backsurgery.
And um so yeah, it's it's I'vehad a I'm only 55 and I've had a

(19:41):
shoulder replacement and it'syeah, it's tremendous takes a
tremendous toll on on your body.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 (19:49):
Wow, yeah, absolutely.
I mean, would you be able totake us through a couple of the
I guess the tougher cases thatyou the tougher would you call
them call-outs uh in theindustry and the UI?

SPEAKER_03 (20:00):
We just call them calls.
Some people call them call outs,but yeah, we just I call them
calls.
Um yeah, like one uh particularcall that um when I got PTSD and
I started having what they callum intrusing intrus I can't even
say the word right now.
Intrusive thoughts, that's whatit was.

(20:21):
Yeah.
Um where I I started I have alike a videotape in my head that
would play in the like a loop oflike bad calls that I'd been on.
And you know, there's a callearly in my career as a
paramedic, and um there was ahouse fire, it was during the
day, and it was only a couple ofblocks from the station I was
at.
And um, so the fire departmentwas obviously dispatched first,

(20:43):
and they got on scene first, anduh, we were on scene shortly
behind them.
And the system that I worked in,there's only one paramedic on
the ambulance, and this isbefore because we typically have
paramedics on fire engines nowtoo, but this is before any of
that.
So when we got on scene, I wasthe only fire or I'm sorry, I
was the only paramedic on scene,and uh it was a two-story house,
and we arrived on scene, therewas flames you know blowing out

(21:05):
of all the windows in the um thesecond story, which means that
it had flashed, and what thatmeans is every single thing in
the room catches on fire like atthe same time, like
instantaneously, everythingreaches its ignition point.
So everything in there is onfire.
And so um we got there, um wefound out there were four kids
inside on the second story whenor in this in the that second

(21:28):
story.
So fire department like you knowwent to work.
Um the one of the uhfirefighters came out and said,
I you know, I need you I needyou to come inside and look at
something, and I'm like, okay.
So the first floor is completelyyou know clean and safe and look
normal because the whole fire ison the second floor and above.
So anyway, so I went inside andthere was a kid that had been

(21:50):
burnt like beyond recognition.
And um so the I think I thinkthe firefighter like knew
there's nothing that we coulddo, but like just needed to
confirm that and um and makethat and have somebody else make
that decision.
And so I was like, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 (22:04):
The kid was already dead at that point, was it?

SPEAKER_03 (22:06):
Well the kid hadn't had no ears and no nose and was
charred and completely um likehadn't really no fingers left.
I mean it was burnt so badlythat yeah, it was compl it was
there was nothing left.
So, you know, I said you have toleave this inside and uh because
I can't bring it out because youknow there's bystanders and the
mom is the mom was out therejust screaming, just like

(22:29):
screaming and screaming andscreaming.
And uh so I went back out andthen um then like one kid after
another was brought out by thefire department, and so like
they guy firefighter comesrunning out and uh he hands me a
like a two-year-old that's likelimp and is burned and you know

(22:51):
skin hanging off of him and andhands them to me.
And so I run and lay him down inthe back of my ambulance and I'm
starting like I need we thepriority for anybody who's been
burned like this is to get anairway.
You have to get an airway inbecause the throat will swell
and the lungs will swell and youwon't be able to um and then
they won't have an airway, soyou can get an airway as fast as

(23:12):
possible.
So I was about just gettingready working on doing that, and
then like out comes anotherfirefighter with another kid,
like the same thing, even ayounger kid.
So I get that kid, so now I gottwo kids on my gurney, and I'm
the only paramedic.
I have an EMT partner who can dominimal stuff, but um, and then

(23:32):
another kid comes out of thishouse, and so I have three not
breathing, limp, burned kids onmy gurney, and uh and it's like
that's the kind of stuff theydon't teach you, you know, in
paramedic school.
Like, you know, like I mean theyteach us the triage and you
know, and that kind of thing,but it was like okay, like who
do you work on first?

(23:52):
Who do you take care of first?
And yeah, I was fortunate enoughthat uh another ambulance got on
scene, and uh so I just like itwas almost like a football, like
here, take this kid and just andgo.
And uh and so I started workingon the rining kids, and then
finally another ambulance pulledup and uh and I was able to hand

(24:12):
that kid off.
And um I mean we could have tooktaken off to the hospital with
the two kids right away, but theeverything I mean it happened so
fast that uh that I wasfortunate enough to have uh be
able to e have each kid have aparamedic to be taken care of
them.
So yeah, that was a pretty uhthat was a tough that was a

(24:34):
tough one.
That was a really tough one.

SPEAKER_00 (24:35):
What happened to the kids though, you know, at the
end of the day?
Didn't you they get to thehospital?
Did they survive?

SPEAKER_03 (24:40):
Oh, so yeah, so they all got to the hospital and um
they ended up getting uh it waskind of a big deal in the
community because the city's notvery big.
And uh so they all got uh likestabilized in the emergency room
and then they got they all wereflown to children's hospital in
Oakland so they could be, youknow, taken care of at a much
better facility.

(25:02):
Yeah.
And so um I believe they alllived.
I'm not exactly sure if they alllive.
Like one of them was burned likereally bad.
And so um but yeah, and that'skind of the thing where you're
like, I don't I don't know if II don't know if I saved a life.
I mean I or you know, they wegave them I do know that we all

(25:22):
gave them the very best chancethat they could have.
Like we you know, like andthat's where you kind of walk
away like the call went reallywell, like we did a good job,
like we didn't mess up.

SPEAKER_00 (25:31):
Yeah, you did everything you could.

SPEAKER_03 (25:33):
Um we did everything we could.
So um so yeah.

SPEAKER_00 (25:37):
And and what I mean, how do you like you say you're
not taught, you know, asparamedics to to handle that
case necessarily, but even theaftermath, like you know, that
once your job was done and yousort of you know said, okay,
great, you know, they're in thehospital, like then what
happens?
Do you kind of just sh shut itoff?
You go get lunch.

(25:58):
You get lunch.

SPEAKER_03 (25:59):
Yeah, you go get lunch.
I mean ri I mean, really, like,because in order to do the job,
like that's what you have to beable to do.
And um I just I mean, really,like I kind of liken it to like
okay, I have a box in my headand you go on a horrible call
like that, and you just put itin the box and you close the lid
and you go get lunch, and thenyou just go on to the next call
and you don't really you knowthink about it.

(26:20):
And you you know, you say toyourself, like, oh wow, that
sucked.
But but you know, you you'd moveon from it.
And um and that's really what Idid my whole entire career, and
uh just kind of go on a bad calland put it in the box, and um
you know, every once in a whilesomething would affect you, but
like for me, it just I thoughtit wasn't affecting me at all.

(26:42):
I thought, you know, I was justit's just kind of like this is
what I do and this is where I'mcomfortable, and like give me
bring on another one, like we'relike let's go to the next one,
let's go to the next one, let'sgo to the next one.
And um and then uh and then youknow, twenty-five years later, I
had a fire, and uh we had so wegot dispatched to a fire in the

(27:06):
middle of the night, and um thefirst engine and the first truck
go in and they knock the firedown, and they say um they do a
primary search saying likethat's when you look, do you do
a quick search to see if there'sany victims inside, and they say
there's no victim.
We we didn't find anybody, theprimary search is clear, and um
to kind of make a long storyshort, so then I uh m me and my

(27:28):
crew are sent in to do asecondary search and do some
other work in there because thenwe have to kind of clean up
after the fire, make sure thefire hasn't gotten into the
walls or gotten into the attic,and um because fire has a funny
way of doing that, and then itcan just go throughout the whole
house, or like this was anapartment, this was a penthouse
uh in an apartment building, andso um so you have to do a lot of

(27:49):
work after the fire to make surethat the fire is like completely
out.
So, anyway, so we'd been sent upthere, we kind of did our
search, didn't find anything,and then um the way the
apartment was set up, like ifyou the penthouse, so if you
walk through the front door, youwalk, you enter into a hallway,
and if you look to your left,there's like you head to the

(28:10):
living room, which is a prettybig living room, and if you look
to the right, there's somebedrooms, a bathroom, and then
the kitchen.
And everything on the left wascompletely charred, like that's
where the fire was, and um likethere's nothing left.
It had flash, there's absolutelylike nothing left.
Like there was a the coils, youknow, and and a mattress that
were was in that room.
That what that's pretty much allthat was left in that room.

(28:33):
Everything had been consumed bythe fire.
And then if you look to yourright, it was clean.
There's uh like smoke damage andsoot and that kind of stuff, but
there was no the fire had notgotten over there.
So anyway, so we we did our wedid a quick search, didn't find
anything, and then um I was onthe charge side of the room,
like trying to because that wasmy job, like, okay, how do we

(28:55):
want to tackle this in terms ofyou know making it?
And the fire is completely outby this point, is it?
Fire's completely out, yeah,there's no fire at all.
And it's clear, you can all thesmoke is gone.
We've we've you know blown allthe smoke out and it's
completely clear.

SPEAKER_01 (29:08):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (29:09):
And so um so anyway, so I was in this room and I I my
turned my head and I was lookingdown the hallway and sure as
shit I see two uh firefighterscarrying a person and uh gets me
right now.
Um and I was overwhelmed withlike I just screwed up like so

(29:33):
bad because we were sent in tolook for this guy and we didn't
find him.
And he was limp and he was ashenand he was obviously dead.
Um but they you know theyhustled him out and down the
stairs and you know into theambulance and uh he ended up
dying.
But it was really like thatmoment that I like I just feel

(29:57):
like I made like the biggestmistake of my entire career and
um and it was really it wasafter that fire and no no nobody
said anything like I was nevernobody said like oh you blew it
you know it's like it you knownot finding victims in fires
like happens all the time justbecause of debris and like

(30:19):
there's people like you'll likea lot of times like bodies are
found in fire like way after thefire's out like during cleanup
and mop up and you knowfirefighters will report like
stepping over a body whilethey're looking for it.
It just is so difficult to do.
But in in my case I felt like Ishould have found found this guy

(30:40):
because you know the the roomwas clean there was no fire
burning um but the I mean youknow like looking back is it was
obvious that this guy wasalready dead there's nothing
anybody could have done even thefirst in crew if they found him
um you know I I don't think hewould have had a chance of
surviving.

SPEAKER_00 (31:01):
Yeah so you weren't even the first crew to go and
looking for them you were yeahso as a second.

SPEAKER_03 (31:06):
So yeah and the and the guys that found him they
were pulling ceilings so we'llwe'll pull the ceiling down to
like and that's where one of theways we look for extent fire
extension into the attic.
And so um they're pullingceiling and they're basically
they found it by accident andthey were looking and they're
like that that something underthe table looks like doesn't
look right and so they went andinvestigated and they they found

(31:28):
it was a body.
So it was like in that momentlike there really like flipped a
switch for me and um and the wayI kind of like describe it is
like you know I put all thesebad calls in a box and I went to
put this guy in that box and thethere was no more room like that
box had been full and so thiswas it was like the straw that

(31:48):
broke the camel's back and umlike it kind of like box
pressurized and blew up all overeverything.
And then that that was afterthat um like I didn't notice
anything for a little bit but mywife talks about how like I I
wouldn't stop talking about thatcall like it was a constantly
there for me like and that'sreally where I started um the

(32:13):
struggle and I think it's itlike all those c bad calls that
I've been storing and some Ishoved away some part of my
brain all just came floodingout.
And then in the next few ensuingmonths I s that's when my
symptoms my PTSD started like Istarted having I started having
nightmares um you know waking upscreaming from calls you know

(32:33):
like work calls uh dreams um Istopped sleeping like I would
sleep very very little um Istarted having that like I said
those intrusive thoughts thatvideotape of calls I hadn't
thought about in in years inlike 20 years would start w
would just play in my headconstantly it's kind of like

(32:54):
being locked in a movie theaterand they turn the volume up and
the brightness up and you can'tclose your eyes and you can't
plug your ears and you have tosit there and and hear it all
the time.
And you just come to you anytime of the day you just might
all the time yeah it just kindayeah just go yeah and there's no
way I didn't know how to shutthem off.
Um as angry I was super angryvery irritable like had a really

(33:18):
short fuse was blowing up uppeople like super irrational um
started crying like I never crylike only when I get really
really angry but I'd start likewe have a really kind of
innocuous call at work and I'dstart crying.
Well so I started having thesesymptoms and you know I didn't I

(33:38):
felt so much shame about it likeI didn't want anybody to know
and so I I'm like okay I need togo see a therapist and like
figure this out so I can just bedone with it and get back to
work.
And uh yeah the therap that'swhen the therapist told me like
oh you have PTSD and at first Iwas like yeah no I don't you
know and part of that comes fromlike having feeling like I have

(33:59):
to be like the strongest one inthe room and I mean part of
that's being a woman and neverwanting to ever show any
weakness and then a lot of it'sjust kind of was my nature of
never ever wanting to show anyweakness and wanting people to
be know that they can depend onme and then they can count on me
and um like oh my god nobody canknow that I'm crying or feeling

(34:20):
horrible and uh so you know Ilike I said I fought it for a
little bit the fact that I hadPTSD and then finally I'm like
okay fine I have PTSD but let'sjust fix this so I can get back
to work and get on with my lifeand my therapist is like yeah it
doesn't work like that.
Yeah so yeah it got it gotreally bad and a lot of it was

(34:41):
because of the shame that I feltand not wanting to ask for help
like you know first responderslike we are the help and so we
don't ask for help at all andyou know a lot of that comes
from our childhood too like wenever we never asked for help
when we were kids we had tosolve all these problems by
ourself yeah and that becomeslike the kind of comfortable
safe place for us so we we don'task for help so you know even

(35:04):
though I've seen a therapistlike I've and that I mean that
was asking for help but it wasalso like no I'm paying you and
like teach me some tricks orwhatever uh so I can you know
get on with this and it wasn'treally asking for help and you
know I didn't tell anybody aboutit um except for obviously my
wife and but these symptoms justcontinued to just get worse and

(35:25):
worse and worse.
And uh you know my therapist issaying like you you need to take
some time off work and um Ifought that for a long time and
I finally took some time offwork and you know like it was a
couple weeks and I was feeling alittle bit better and I'm like
all right yeah I got this and soI went back to work and then I
started on the way home fromwork I get off you know work a

(35:47):
48 hour shift I get off in themorning and then I start like
get in my car pull out of thedriveway and I'd just start
sobbing like just out of nowherelike I had no control over it
wasn't thinking about anything Ijust start sobbing and I'd cry
all the way home and then um theway our schedule works we work
two days on four days off and soas the four days went on um I

(36:09):
you know I'd start to feel alittle bit better and I'm like
okay I got this I go back towork um because you know I
always at that point in time Ialways thought the very worst
thing that could ever happen tome was to me like to not be able
to handle my job or do my joband uh so yeah so the shame was
just extraordinary and then um Iworked a shift uh I had to I had

(36:35):
to pay back some trades um andso I had to work I worked a
little extra I worked likealmost four days in a row and I
when I got off that morning Iwas like I'm not gonna cry like
I'm gonna keep my shit togetherand you know not cry on the way
home and so I did so I made itall the way home and I was like
yeah I got this I sent my wife atext and I said I didn't cry on

(36:57):
the way home like I'm good and Ididn't get a response and uh I
was gonna go play tennis and uhmeet a friend and so you know I
changed my clothes and I got inmy car and I started driving
across town and I wasn't liketrying to like keep my composure
or anything like that and that'sthat's when the world the whole

(37:18):
world came crumbling down on me.
Wow I was uh started sobbing uhso overwhelmed um I was like I
can't do this anymore it's likejust it's like the pain is just
like extraordinarily it's justlike your body feels horrible
your brain feels horrible youjust like and I I didn't know

(37:41):
that there was any other answerout there and the only thing I
could think to do to end it wasto drive into a tree and kill
myself.
And uh so I became very suicidalat that moment.
And so I started well I firststarted looking for a pole to
drive into and then I'm likewell poles are made to be hit
and knocked over so like I gottastart looking for a tree and so
um and I was even thinking likelike even if I you know am

(38:05):
severely injured and knocked youknow put in a coma or whatever
like that'll work too because Ithat way I won't have to go back
to work and I won't have to tellanybody why like it it was like
it was an out it was like theonly way I could think of to get
out of the the hole that I wasin.

(38:25):
So I started looking for a treeand then I started thinking well
if you do this like the firstresponders that go on you like
you're just gonna be addinganother you know bad call into
their box and um this the whereI live I I know a lot of the
firefighters and so um so I wasjust like you like you just you

(38:46):
can't like you can't do thislike just get yourself to this
can tennis courts like just getyourself and so I like just did
everything I could to get myselfbecause I knew once I got there
and I'm around people you knowthen it I'm not gonna do
anything crazy.
And uh I sent my wife a text andI said no matter how much I like
beg and plead after my four daysaying that I'm fine I go you

(39:06):
can't let me go back to work.
Yeah and uh yeah she sent metext back said yeah I already
decided that and uh sorry I'm alittle emotional um so anyway so
that was you know I made it tothe tennis courts and that was
that was a moment where I'm likeokay I I actually need to get
help and so um so uh I calledinto work and I said like I I

(39:33):
have to go off like I can't Ijust I just called and said I
just I need some time off and uhyou know put me off you know
start burning like basically putme off on sick leave.
Yeah and uh and so we havesomething called workers comp
which is uh you know like uh youknow like if it's insurance like
if you get injured at work orwhatever and so the battalion

(39:54):
chief that I spoke with and youknow he said is is like what is
this for?
Like can can I ask and I wassuper hesitant because I just
didn't want anybody to know thatyou know what was wrong with me.

SPEAKER_01 (40:05):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (40:06):
And uh and then I remembered this battalion
chief's sister uh was aparamedic back in the day and
she had actually killed herselffrom PTSD.
Oh my god so I was like okaywell this guy's c we'll
understand so I can tell him andso I told him and he's like okay
and so he told me like you knowhow how to go off like I had no
idea how to go off on workerscomp or anything and so anyway

(40:27):
so that's really where my but myjourney began and uh so I went
off work yeah I had everyintention of going back and so I
started you know I mean I wasstill going to therapy and then
I started going to anothertherapist who does a treatment
called um EMDR which is a way ofreprogramming your brain you
know working on these calls thatwere I call it like they are

(40:49):
haunting me and so I started uhseeing her and um and I just
wasn't getting any better I wasjust like getting worse like the
the anger was worse the sleepingwas worse the nightmares were
worse and even though I was offwork it just I was circling the
drain and spiraling and thensomebody told me about this
retreat it's called the uh WestCoast post-trauma retreat and

(41:12):
it's a um it's a six day retreatfor first responders with PTSD
and at first I was like yeah Idon't need that like I don't
need some residential programlike that's not me like I'm not
crazy and then things are justgetting so bad I was finally
like alright I'll call them andI called them and I ended up
going and that that was where myrecovery started and it was 100%

(41:39):
because I I spent time with mypeers who were going through the
same thing.
So there were the way it worksare six of us or six clients you
know that were there to betreated and then there were like
15 peers and they're all copsand firefighters and paramedics
dispatchers who had PTSD and hadgone through the program and

(42:02):
they were just there like tosupport us for the week.
And then there are twoclinicians and a chaplain and
it's basically like six monthsof therapy compressed into the
six days and you basically likeyou you share all your secrets
with your peers and then youfind out that they're all been
struggling with the same thing.
And you know here I thought youknow like I was like we have 125

(42:23):
uniformed personnel in mydepartment and I'm the only one
that's going through this.
So there is something so wrongwith me.
And then I go to this retreatand I find it it's like nope
like so many of us arestruggling and um being able to
share your secrets and thethings that I felt shame over
and uh with my peers just likechanged everything for me.

(42:45):
And um and then like therapystarted working and the EMDR
started working and you know Istill had some moments where I
really struggled but um I meanit's been 10 years and I still
have moments where I strugglebut like it's it's uh it's like
I know I can manage everythingnow and you know the that was

(43:05):
really like what you knowchanged everything for me.

SPEAKER_00 (43:11):
Wow that's that's incredible and and and how many
I mean that's the thing you'resaying you had 125 unim uniform
personnel in your department andyou thought the only one
realistically do you think eachone of them to some degree is is
experiencing it?

SPEAKER_03 (43:29):
So yeah so I went back to my department and um
there's another guy that uh frommy department I got a phone call
from him one night and um I hewon't care if I use his name uh
I go hey Mark like what's goingon and he's like yeah I'm not
doing so well he's he so he youknow he's like can you tell me a
little bit about your experienceand so I told him and he's like

(43:50):
yeah he goes I think he goes Ihave that too he goes I carry a
bullet around with me everywhereI go oh my god in case I need it
you know for himself and uh sohe ended up re having to leave
uh because of PTSD and uh so heand I went back to our
department and like shared ourstories because I hadn't talked

(44:11):
to really anybody because Ididn't want anybody to know you
know I was full of so much shameand so um so yeah I just like
you know that morning I justleft and nobody knew what
happened.
And so anyway so we shared ourstories and after that like my
phone was ringing with peoplewho are struggling and it's
amazing because that retreatthat I go to like like I know

(44:33):
there's so many people from mydepartment that have gone to it
and now they have a care youknow we have finally have a peer
counseling program and you knowways for people to get help you
know while they're still workingso it doesn't turn into full
blown PTSD and but yeah I wasnot by any means the only person
struggling.
Like there are a lot of peoplelike really really hurting.

SPEAKER_00 (44:54):
Yeah absolutely I mean you talking about the way
that that it comes on sometimeskind of because I did a
documentary a couple of yearsago about death and grief and
and that kind of stuff andsomeone described to me you know
that the feeling of grief islike you know um you have a box
and inside the box is a buttonand the other thing inside the

(45:16):
box is a ball that's constantlybouncing around you know and
every once in a while it'll justhit the button.
And when the grief is reallyfresh that box is really small
and the bout the thing isconstantly hitting the button.
But like as it as as you get asyou as as it cut time goes on
and you heal the box becomesmuch bigger and you still have
the button and the ball is stillbouncing around but it doesn't

(45:38):
hit the button so often you knowum that's brilliant.

SPEAKER_03 (45:42):
I've never heard that before that's like super
brilliant um is it is it similarto that?
I mean that the whole griefcomponent is huge too and that's
such a oh my god that's the mostbrilliant thing I've heard.
So I would say similar to thatit's very similar to that the
the button isn't as sensitivebut it doesn't like I don't get
I don't get triggered almosthardly at all anymore.

(46:05):
Like very little triggers me.
Every once in a while like asound will catch me off guard
and it'll like just kind of likea snap.
It'll just my my nervous systemwill just like poof but then
it's like it's gone.

SPEAKER_00 (46:16):
It's it's much it's like a spike.

SPEAKER_03 (46:18):
Yeah it's like a spike and then it goes away it
doesn't like continue to ramp upand I don't have to like work on
you know trying to uhde-escalate it or anything like
that.

SPEAKER_00 (46:27):
Like it just kind of happens and that's just through
practice and working on it anddoing all the work and healing
and um that it yeah it doesn'tramp up like it used to I guess
the the sort of big sort of bigpicture question is that you
know given you know your yourexperience at PTSD and and the

(46:48):
job and the fact that you lovethis job and you couldn't
imagine doing anything else likegiven the fact that you knew
that PTSD was a risk with thisjob going back and doing it all
again would you still do it youknow uh as you have I I I would
I absolutely would.

SPEAKER_03 (47:04):
It was it was a it was the best job uh for me like
I can't really I can't imaginedoing anything else.
I can't uh I miss it so much.
Like I really really miss it.
Um yeah I would I wouldabsolutely You know it's funny
though with some of the physicalis things that I I'm starting to

(47:25):
struggle with now like my backand my shoulder and like that
has almost been worse than thePTSD in terms of like would I do
it all over again.
But um but I uh without questionabsolutely without question.

SPEAKER_00 (47:42):
I mean for anyone listening obviously listening to
this episode and and theexperiences and they probably
anyone interested being a firstresponder I think probably these
days might have an awareness ofPTSD but anyone listening to
this and going I would love tobe a first responder but I am
you know afraid or I'm scared ofthe risks or whatever like what
kind of message would you giveto them and you know about doing

(48:06):
this job um again I tell themit's the best job in the world
if you know what I mean ifthat's the kind of thing that
they like to do.

SPEAKER_03 (48:15):
And and it's it's really different now.
You know at the time I had noidea what I was getting into and
I think no matter how much youtell somebody about the job they
have no idea what they'regetting themselves into.
I think it's like I mean I'm nota parent but you hear parents
say this like they had no ideawhat they were getting
themselves into.
Even though they might have readevery book and heard every story

(48:36):
you don't really know untilyou're in it.
But things have changed a lotlike the culture has changed a
lot like when I was a youngfirefighter and a young
paramedic the culture was wedon't talk about this stuff.
Yeah like you don't you you justdon't talk about it like you you
know it's it was like the suckit up buttercup and you know you
it was all about being strongand um you know withstanding

(49:00):
everything and never asking forhelp and never um and never just
saying hey I need a break likenever like you just you push
yourself to the you know the theend and um and that's really
changed.
It's the culture has reallychanged.
Fortunately like there arethings in place now to take you
know way better care of us.

(49:20):
You know when there's a bad calllike it's all hands on deck now
to like to deal with it to talkabout it and get people the help
that they need so it doesn'tlike plant itself in your brain
somewhere and like wear on yournervous system you know without
you even knowing about it untilit blows up.
And so so I I think things are alot better.

SPEAKER_00 (49:41):
I I I love that analogy that that you had of
like you know 50 70 years agothe equipment just the physical
safety equipment you had wasless advanced than what you had
in your day and what they haveyou know now.
And it's the same with with withmental health you know this sort
of awareness and the approachthe technology the science is

(50:02):
always advancing and as itadvances the risks become less
to the the the firefighter, thefirst responder, whoever it
might be Yeah 100% I mean justkind of getting into these sort
of final thoughts you know partof part of the conversation I
mean for someone who does a joblike you and I'm sure you've
spoken to many of yourcolleagues about this, I mean

(50:23):
does it I've always kissed Ihaven't I I once thought about
maybe when I was in a sort ofcareer transition phase when I
was in my early 20s I thoughtbeing a firefighter would be
really cool, you know, kind ofthing.
I never went down that road butI wonder how it changes the way
that you see the world you knowdoes it change the way that you
see the world you know in lifeand and how does how does that

(50:46):
uh how does it change it?

SPEAKER_03 (50:48):
It really really does um I've learned how fragile
life is how you know like likethings can just change in an
instant like how many calls I'vebeen on where you know somebody
just like ran out to go to thestore to get some milk and
didn't come home because theywere you know hit by another car
and they were killed.

(51:09):
And just like how fast life canchange and um and how precious
life is and um and then alsolike the whole other side of
humanity that's just ugly andjust you know like the poor and
you know like how they actuallylive like you know you hear you
know news stories and it's likeyeah but until you've been in

(51:30):
these people's houses and youknow seen like what they live in
and what kids grew up in that'slike yeah they have no chance
you know really of making itjust because of what they grew
up in.

SPEAKER_01 (51:41):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (51:41):
And um and they also learned there's a there's a lot
of great things in the world.
There's a lot of really stronglike tough people out there and
there's a lot of really goodpeople out there.
And um and so yeah you just yousee I you see a whole other part
of the world I really feel likefirst responders should be part
of uh decision making on likehow to tackle the homeless

(52:04):
problem or violence or anythingbecause like we are we have our
hands in it every single day andlike we we really see what's
going on and the the politiciansdon't they have no they have no
idea they've never been in thesepeople's houses they've never
been on the streets at twoo'clock in the morning with a
homeless people or a homelessperson.
You know what I mean they'venever they've never been there

(52:24):
and they they just they don'tknow.

SPEAKER_00 (52:27):
It's like you guys see raw humanity without a
filter basically you see theabsolute best and the absolute
worst at the same time sometimesI can't even imagine.
Yeah a hundred percent wowamazing um and I guess sort of
just uh wrapping things up thethe end of all these uh shows I

(52:50):
love to just you know pluganything that you've got going
on um so obviously just let usknow you know you've got a
podcast you've got a book whattell us uh tell us what people
can tell us what being up to andpeople can find you uh well I'm
on I'm on a Facebook really butI'm on Instagram uh uh Christy
E.

SPEAKER_03 (53:09):
Warren and then also I have the firefighter
deconstructed um I have aSubstack I really like writing
I'll I write a lot about um youknow firefighting stuff uh
recovering from PTSD stuff andthen just other crap um so yeah
I still like to write uh I havea podcast I haven't done an
episode in a while but um on thepodcast called the firefighter

(53:32):
deconstructed I interviewbasically first responders who
have gone through PTSD orwhatever and kind of like just
tell them just tell them theirstory and their journey and um
yeah kind of like almost it'skind of like what we just did
right here.
And yeah and so um so yeah.
Yeah and there's a book and soit's called uh Flashpoint um you

(53:57):
can get it anywhere books aresold um it's basically like my
story get my career getting PTSDgetting better and a lot about
what we talked about today butjust kind of like even in a
little bit further depth depthand a lot more um like a lot
more calls that I've been on orin it just a little bit more in

(54:18):
depth about my journey.

SPEAKER_00 (54:20):
And like I said at the top it it is really um it's
it's really well written andyou've really transported
because I was kind of readingthrough it and then I just felt
like so I just want morechapter, just one more chapter.
It's really sort of um very uhyou get really engrossed really
quickly.
So yeah congrats again on that.

SPEAKER_03 (54:37):
Thank you very much.

SPEAKER_00 (54:38):
No worries.
Thank you.
Christy thank you I mean thankyou so much for taking the time
to share your story and and andreally I hope it's helpful to
people um and it can sort ofenlighten a little bit more
behind the scenes of you knowthe good the bad and the ugly of
uh of being a first responderand a firefighter and a
paramedic so thank you so muchagain.

SPEAKER_03 (54:58):
Oh thank you so much for having me Chris it was a
real honor to be on your show.
Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 (55:02):
No worries great we'll speak to you soon.
Awesome and that's a wrap onthis week's episode.
A huge thanks to Christy forbeing so open and sharing her
incredible journey.
And of course a big thanks toyou all for listening as well.

(55:22):
If today's episode touched ondifficult experiences you're
dealing with or if you'restruggling with PTSD or your own
mental health please do not gothrough it alone.
In the US you can dial or text988 for the Suicide and Crisis
Lifeline to talk to someoneright away.
If you're elsewhere in the worldplease check local hotlines and
services in your area becausereaching out can make all the

(55:44):
difference.
If you'd like to dive deeperinto Christie's stories you can
check out her episode page atnoordinarymonday.com there you
will find links and more infoabout the story.
You'll also find extras acrossour socials we're on Instagram,
LinkedIn Facebook and more nowyou won't want to miss next
week's episode my guest is TerryRich, a serial CEO and innovator

(56:08):
who not only helped crack one ofAmerica's biggest lottery scams,
but once saved a struggling zoowith some of the strangest ideas
you'll ever hear from late nightconcerts with beer to selling
line and tiger poop as deerrepellent it's a wild mix of
business savvy, bold creativityand scandalous true crime.

(56:29):
Subscribe now so you don't missout on that.
If you've got a career storythat you think would be great on
the show we would love to hearfrom you.
You can get in touch via oursocials you can email hello at
noordinary monday.com or you canuse the Submit Your Story page
on our website.
And if you enjoyed this episodeand want to help us continue the

(56:51):
show please do two really quickand easy things for us.
Leave a five star rating reviewand tell a family member or
friends.
That's it really easy this showis produced hosted and edited by
me Chris Baron thanks so muchfor listening and have a great
Monday everyone
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