September 18, 2025 • 44 mins
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Have you ever had that unmistakable gut feeling about someone you just met? That inner shiver that can't be explained but somehow turns out to be right? In this illuminating conversation, Mary Rothwell welcomes Anna Quigley, known as the "intuitive Yoda," to explore how women can reclaim their natural intuitive abilities despite societal conditioning that teaches us to doubt our inner knowing.
Anna reveals the fascinating science behind intuition—we process a staggering 11 million bits of information every second, yet only 1% reaches our conscious mind. The rest? It speaks through our senses as gut feelings, unexplainable chills, or simply knowing something without understanding how. This isn't mystical thinking but rather our body's sophisticated information processing system at work.
The challenge many women face is distinguishing between intuition and fear, as both can create similar physical sensations. Anna offers practical guidance for teasing these apart, explaining how fear focuses on limitations ("I can't do this job") while intuition often feels like excitement—a heart shiver signaling something is right for us, even when it doesn't make logical sense. Through personal stories and examples, she demonstrates how following seemingly illogical intuitive nudges led to her most fulfilling career opportunities.
You'll discover actionable techniques to strengthen your intuitive abilities, from creating brief moments of stillness in your day to practicing sensory imagination—using all your senses to envision what you want to create. Perhaps most encouraging is the reminder that midlife and beyond can be a powerful time to reconnect with intuition as societal pressures lessen, offering a fresh perspective on aging as a period of wisdom and clarity rather than limitation.
Ready to trust your inner knowing and make decisions aligned with your authentic self? You can find Anna and her resources HERE.
Grab her freebie HERE
Have thoughts on this episode or ideas for the future that you want to share with Mary? You can reach her at NSVpodcast@gmail.com
Comments about this episode? Suggestions for a future episode? Email me directly at NSVpodcast@gmail.com.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Mary (00:05):
Welcome to No Shrinking Violence.
I'm your host, Mary Rothwell,licensed therapist and certified
integrative mental healthpractitioner.
I've created a space where wecelebrate the intuition and
power of women who want to breakfree from limiting narratives.
We'll explore all realms ofwellness, what it means to take
up space unapologetically, andhow your essential nature is key
(00:28):
to living life on your terms.
It's time to own your space,trust your nature and flourish.
Let's dive in.
Hey, violets, welcome to theshow.
I think women in particular areborn with intuition.
I think it's society's rulesthat make us doubt what we feel
when it comes to intuition andour experience of other people.
(00:51):
First, like their presence ortheir energy, we're taught to be
polite and not make anyone feeluncomfortable.
Yet we're also supposed to beaware of our surroundings and
take action if we feeluncomfortable, sometimes because
of our conditioning to staysmall or not make others feel
any type of way.
We may sense something is a bitoff, but we ignore it.
(01:13):
In the past, there were timeswhen I got a specific feeling
about a person when I first metthem, like an inner shiver.
I used to chalk it up to my owninternal situation Was I just
nervous meeting them?
Was I just having an off day,but later, when I either learned
more about the person or Iinteracted with them more, my
intuition turned out to havebeen correct.
(01:35):
They either weren't a greatfriend or a supportive co-worker
or a well-matched datingpartner.
Often, though, when thishappens, I can't even pinpoint
what it is about them.
That makes me inwardly cringe.
When it comes to situations, Ithink it can be more challenging
to determine what is intuitionlike.
I would love to apply for thatjob, and what is fear?
(01:58):
There is no way I could do thatjob.
Notice that the second thoughtbased on fear isn't that you
don't want the job.
It's fear that you can't do thejob.
Often, intuition feels like fearin the body.
It can make us feel like ourheart is beating faster or our
breath quickens.
When I get excited about a newventure, it's like a little
(02:20):
heart shiver.
Isn't that how fear feels?
Like an internal shiver, but attimes it's been a sign that I
should go for it.
Anyway, I talk about this morein a mini episode episode 38, if
you want to give it a listen,okay.
So my guest today helps peoplefigure all this out how to live
from a place of intuition andmake their dreams into a reality
(02:43):
, to live from a place ofintuition and make their dreams
into a reality.
Anna Quigley has been calledthe intuitive Yoda for her
insights, experience andcommitment to empowering
individuals to find and livetheir unique purpose.
She uses sensory imaginationand quantum mind-body techniques
to assist people in manifestingtheir dreams and the life
they're meant to live.
She's based in SouthernCalifornia and she offers
(03:06):
speaking engagements, workshops,courses and coaching services,
sharing her expertise,experience and insights.
Welcome to no Shrinking Violets, anna.
Anna (03:17):
Thank you so much, Mary.
I'm happy to be here.
Mary (03:20):
Alrighty.
So I often start out withasking my guests to share a
little bit about their own story, because often what we
experience gets us to where weare.
So can you start with sharing alittle about you and how you
learned to trust your ownintuition and how that impacted
your journey?
Anna (03:39):
Well, it's impacted pretty much every part of my life
since I discovered it, if youwill, when I was, I think, high
school, early college, I was sofearful of making a wrong
decision, kind of as you werespeaking what if this doesn't
really feel right, but yet I'mdrawn to it, I'm attracted to it
(04:02):
?
And what if I go this way and Idon't like it?
I felt almost as if, well, thatwas it.
There was only one way.
There's no turning back.
And it's crazy because we're atany moment we can pivot and
shift and switch.
And intuition, learning tolisten to my intuition and that
(04:23):
came from spiritual studies,mind body studies that I started
doing in college and I testedit because I have it.
There's an inner skeptic and,like I know a lot of your
listeners, it's like, yeah, butwhat is this?
Is this my emotion?
Is this really my intuitionspeaking?
I tested it in some silly waysand it was never wrong from my
(04:47):
own experience, never wrong.
So I really started working withit and throughout my life it
has gotten me out ofrelationships that were not
ideal which difficult as it was,significant and into some
amazing jobs and situations that, oh, that's not really what I
(05:09):
want.
My rational mind is fighting onone side, going no.
No, this is your background,this is your experience, but I'm
really drawn here.
Why am I going there?
And jobs that turned out to bephenomenal.
My best jobs were generally theones that didn't, on the
outside, look like that was theperfect fit, but somehow, not
(05:30):
somehow through my intuition,through that inner knowing and
that practice of gettingfamiliar with it, like
recognizing the voice of an oldfriend.
Oh OK, that's what it is.
Discerning the differencebetween that fearful and that,
oh yeah, yeah, this is right.
(05:50):
May not make sense.
I don't necessarily understandit, but I'm going for it, and it
has always led me to the nextgreat adventure.
Mary (06:00):
Yeah, well, I think we I mean I assume, when I say
intuition, that people know whatI mean.
Are you able to define it Likedoes it feel different for
everybody, or do you feel likethere are like common feelings
or threads that we allexperience with it?
Anna (06:25):
And it can show up for each person, and it can show up
daily in different ways.
There's a science behind it aswell.
This is a real thing.
We are all born not just women,although I think we tend to be
more in tune, more open to itbut we're all born with it, so
(06:47):
it's an innate gift that we'regiven, that we can with learn to
recognize and follow moreeasily the science behind it.
If I can go a little geeky forjust a second, we pick up 11
million bits of informationevery single second, and the
piece that really surprised methe most when I was doing my
research is that only 1% of thatis picked up by our brain.
(07:08):
The rest of it's picked up byour senses, so by our gut and by
you know, those little chillsor auditory senses, and it makes
total sense when you startlooking at intuition, which
speaks to us.
It makes itself known throughour senses, that gut feeling
that everybody knows.
(07:28):
Or when you get chills, theconfirmation chills, right,
we've all had that.
Or, and this one, I think too,is more related to women, but
that I just know.
Well, how do you know?
I don't know, but I know, andthere's unshakable confidence in
something.
When that comes through, that'sintuition, that is intuition
(07:51):
speaking to us.
So it could be a repetitivesign that you see that you
didn't notice before, but that'sreassuring, something that you
might be interested in.
Or even when we know, you knowthat little voice, that inner
voice.
Sometimes it's audible, but itcould also be people talking to
(08:12):
you about a particular book or asituation or a trip you should
take in a short period of time,repetitively.
That's kind of a way intuitiongets our attention.
So it comes in different waysat different times and the more
aware we become, the morefamiliar it's like.
Get to know your intuition andhow it speaks to you uniquely,
(08:36):
the easier it becomes, and in myown experience it has never
been anything other than neutral, but so you don't always know
what it's guided you to.
You know, turn left here.
I don't know why I'm turningleft here.
You may have missed an accidentor got stuck in traffic, like I
did recently because I didn'tlisten.
Mary (08:56):
Yeah, well, I've learned.
For me it's sort of a tiny beatof silence.
I know that sounds weird, but Ithink I'm noticing like a micro
expression and every time Ithink back on it, like I think
of situations when I've saidsomething and I know somebody
isn't agreeing, but they don'tsay it.
(09:17):
And it happened a couple timesin job interviews and when I
went back and thought about itI'm like if I had listened to
that beat of silence, I shouldhave followed up and looked at
that person and addressed sortof that unasked question.
And I think it is very easy toignore it or think it's woo-woo
(09:39):
or it's you know.
Of course that's not the case.
So what do you think?
I mean, I talked about sort ofsociety scripts where, let's say
, you are walking down thestreet and you feel just like
not settled.
I think sometimes, if we canthink, all right, I don't want
to cross the street because it'sgoing to look rude or I don't
(10:00):
want to be that person.
So I think sometimes thosethings get in the way of just
listening.
What do you?
Do you agree with that?
Are there other things that cancloud that intuition for us?
Anna (10:13):
I absolutely agree, and it's expectations you mentioned
earlier.
You know, as women, oh, youneed to be polite, you need to
be, you know to behave in acertain way, not be too
aggressive, and we tend to putourselves second.
It's our nature.
We're caregivers.
We do that naturally, innately,but at our own expense, often
(10:38):
Not hearing that or notrecognizing and allowing that
and having the courage,initially, I think it can take,
to honor that, even over thesocietal expectations.
And then, of course, therational mind is which I tease.
I tease my rational mind andstop being a bully, because it's
(11:00):
critical, it wants to keepeverything straight.
So a job, it's critical, itwants to keep everything
straight.
So a job.
Well, you're not, you know,that's not really your
background or that's not reallywhat you said you wanted or
you're really looking for, butyet there's a pull.
And that happened to me withthe job.
It's like why am I?
No, but I keep kept seeing thead and I'm like, just just go
talk to them and it turned outto be one of my, one of my best
(11:23):
dads, even though it didn't fitthe picture.
It didn't fit the picture.
So, yeah, you've got thoseinfluences and and you know the
rational mind and the emotions.
Well, here's what I should do,rather than listening to where
we're really being guided to forour betterment.
For our betterment and I meanbetterment in every way, not
(11:46):
just careers and relationships,but on, my intuition,
streamlines my errands.
Most of the time it's oops,don't forget.
You know that little voice.
It's like, oh, did you forgetyour, your keys?
Or you're walking out the door.
It's like, oh, you forgot,whatever it was, the thing you
need to take to the bank.
Where does that come from?
Mary (12:05):
Yeah.
Anna (12:06):
Where does that come from?
Mary (12:08):
Well, now I think especially our world is so loud
and so fast and we are not oftenmindful.
So you know we've talkedalready about kind of what it
feels like for us.
But how do you help women learnto recognize their intuition?
Anna (12:27):
You talked about that moment of silence, that beat of
silence.
The core is starting to berespectful of your own space,
your own space, quietness.
And that's hard.
When you're running around andtaking care of everyone else and
(12:47):
busy with work and family andeverything else, it's difficult
to find that time.
But it's essential to startlearning to listen, to listen to
those.
Give ourselves the opportunityto take.
It could be sit in your car fortwo minutes before you go in the
house to take care of the kidsand feed you know, get dinner
(13:10):
ready and whatnot.
Sit for two minutes in the carand just be still.
Not the radio, not the phone,not checking text messages, but
just and take a breath and relaxa little bit and see what comes
up.
Meditation, yes, it's notsomething everyone loves to do,
it's not just sitting, you know,oming on a mountaintop.
(13:32):
Take a walk out in nature, walkthrough the park, be still
Something I call the power ofthe shower, and it's not just me
.
There have been all kinds ofamazing inventions that have
come about with people relaxingin the shower.
Because you're tuning out thatrational mind, you're turning
(13:55):
the dial down on that chaos,that noise that's constantly
surrounding us.
So the more.
You can get to moments it'sagain doesn't have to be any
major like sit for an hour andjust find pockets of time to be
still and before you're runningout the door to run errands,
(14:18):
take a minute and just be stilland oh, yeah, I need to grab
that.
Oops, where's my phone?
No-transcript.
(14:48):
Well, I walked in that room andthat person there's just I
don't know what it is.
Or yeah, I'm walking across thestreet.
Something here doesn't feelsafe.
Make a little note.
Oh, what was that?
Did anything happen?
Or did I just feel something?
Or did I just know I needed togo into that store?
(15:09):
And then you run into an oldfriend, or just you know paying
attention, because in you knowtwo hours you're going to have
forgotten about it and whathappened.
So the more you see thatrepetitive pattern, it's another
tool to start recognizing andallowing that tool to start
(15:29):
recognizing and allowing that.
Mary (15:30):
So, yeah, and I think the word meditation feels big and
heavy, but mindfulness isexactly what you're saying, it's
that moment to moment.
So being in the shower likeexperience the lather of the
shampoo, you know what, what isthe conditioner?
Feel like trying, instead ofthinking about all the things to
do that day, just give yourselfthat time to experience.
(15:50):
Or even when I wake up, I trynot to reach for my phone for 10
minutes.
I mean, some people can't, youknow, lounge in bed for even 10
minutes but trying to just letyourself wake up, be aware, take
stock, like what does my bodyfeel like today?
Do I feel rested?
Do I have any aches and pains?
(16:11):
Did I sleep wrong?
You know, looking at the lightcoming through the window,
that's part of also helping ussleep better.
But being in our life andtrying to just take that second
to, maybe it's one breath, youknow, sometimes one breath.
Just being in that moment andrecognizing, like what do I feel
(16:33):
like right now?
Is my jaw clenched?
Am I like my stomach clenched?
Like letting all of that gomakes you more aware of what's
happening intuition wise andalso what's happening around you
.
Anna (16:45):
And important point is the senses.
So feel like what are thesheets?
Feel like this morning is, feelthe weight of the blankets or
the cool air coming from thewindow.
Give yourself that moment inthe morning and that's.
That's really an insightfultime too, because we've shut off
that rational mind, is quietedwith the sleep.
(17:06):
So how many times have we hadthose aha moments when we wake
up with a solution to somethingwe've been trying to figure out
for a while, because we'vequieted that down.
But bringing in all of thesenses and starting the morning
with that and whether that's oh,I can smell the coffee that's
that's brewing downstairs, andreally welcome to that.
And try through all your senses, what am I seeing?
(17:29):
Oh, this wonderful shadow onthe ceiling from the light
coming in from the window and,like you said, the smell of
coffee, or maybe the sound ofthe dogs or, in my neighborhood,
the roosters crowing, you know,next door.
And awaken all your sensesbecause they're going to be your
guide throughout the day for somany things.
Mary (17:52):
Yeah, and you talked about nature.
I'm a big nature girl and Iweave that into my work a lot.
And I you know we are reallypowerful as a species because of
our brain, but it's also thething that often defeats us,
because we think ourselves outof something, or you know, fear
comes from our conditioning.
Our amygdala learns what to beafraid of and then it
(18:15):
extrapolates that to nearlyeverything so that it's to our
detriment.
Nature, and you talked aboutgoing for a walk.
There is nothing that gets youmore in touch with your person
than to put your phone in yourback pocket, put it on, do not
disturb and even if you areoutside, even if you don't want
(18:35):
to walk through the woodsbecause you don't want the bugs
or whatever, sit outside for 10minutes, look at the sky,
observe the clouds, find afavorite tree, Even if you are
living in the city.
When you walk through the city,find a favorite tree, Even if
you are living in the city.
When you walk through the city,find your favorite tree, name
it, Like all of those thingswhere we're connecting to what
we actually are, which is nature, and we forget because we're so
(18:58):
evolved.
But part of that is not beingevolved because when animals
sense, they sense things.
They're not thinking.
I better not go to thiswatering hole because this is
where you know the whateverattacked me the last time.
Anna (19:14):
I think it's they sense when there's danger and we've
become so disconnected from thatand yet we have all of that in
us, those senses, all of that isthere but we have shut them
down and we've got so much noiseand busyness around.
I heard a speech from arecently awarded Nobel Prize
(19:36):
winning scientist recently andone of his students was like oh
yeah, it obviously takes a lotof work.
It's really hard work to do,and he goes.
Yeah, but he says honestly, Iget my best ideas when I'm
running around Torrey PinesState Park, letting all of that
go.
He goes.
That's where the juices startflowing.
The creativity, I mean therational mind and the organized
(19:59):
it keeps us organized.
But those senses, that time innature look at that beautiful
leaf on the ground and the dewon the flowers hugging your
favorite tree I love that.
Finding your own tree andnaming your own tree.
I'm going to do that in myneighborhood.
So I love that, that connection.
It just.
(20:19):
It takes a split second to dothat, but it awakens and
stimulates that activity andallows our intuitive thoughts
and energy and feelings to beseen and recognized more easily.
Mary (20:35):
Well, and I think when we're young, we do it
instinctively.
We know what we likeinstinctively, we know what
books we like, or we know whatsports, or we know if we don't
like sports, or we want to playthe violin, or you know, I think
about that before all thesocial scripts happen that girls
aren't supposed to do thisthing, or I think that we just
naturally know those things, butthen we lose it as we get older
(21:02):
.
Anna (21:02):
Or we're conditioned out of it.
Well, no, that's not.
Oh, I love poetry.
Well, yeah, you're not going tobe a poetry major in college,
what are you going to do withthat?
Or an artist or some of theother things?
It's like, no, it has to bepractical.
But those yearnings, thoseurges, stay with us, they don't
(21:23):
go anywhere.
And it comes a point in ourlives and quite often it's
midlife and beyond and beyondwhen those start coming up again
, because maybe the kids are outof the house, or you've done
your career and you're ready forchange, but they start
percolating and start bubblingbecause they don't go away,
(21:44):
those desires and those thingsthat we love.
They get suppressed perhaps,but you know they're always
there waiting.
It's like okay, are you readyfor me?
Are you ready for it now?
And oftentimes it's even abetter time because we have, you
know, wisdom and a little morecourage and faith in our own
(22:05):
abilities.
Mary (22:07):
Yeah, and we don't.
Often, I think, as women, whenwe think about something like
menopause, I think we're like,oh, I don't want to go through
it, or these.
We focus on the changes and Ifeel like it's.
You know, these things aregoing to happen and I know, as
someone who's certified infunctional nutrition and having
gone through it myself, thereare things to make it way better
(22:28):
.
But I think, once we getthrough those things and we've
done a lot of what areprescribed as life tasks we've,
you know, completed an education, maybe we've had a career,
maybe we've raised childrenwe're moving through that and I
think we then have that abilityto start to look inside a little
more, like what is my nextthing that I want to achieve?
(22:51):
I think we have that gift andwe often focus on what we look
like, because we're aging and weknow our skin is different and
we gain weight and we can't docertain things, and those are
the things that we can't change.
Anna (23:05):
But there's certain things , and those are the things that
we can't change, but there's, Ithink, a huge gift that we get,
when we get to that part of life, agreed, we've got wisdom,
we've gotten more clarity, wehave a better sense of what's
really important to us.
What makes me sad, when I hearit, is when women will say, oh,
I think I'm too old, it's toolate to change, and they're 50,
(23:28):
or they're 60 even, or 70 even.
It's like no, if you're beingcalled to do something, we're
all here for specific purposesand we all have innate gifts and
as women, we tend not to payattention to the things that
come easily, the things that arejust oh yeah, I mean, I've had
(23:52):
my own.
You know.
Friends say to me oh, you're sogood at this.
I mean, thank you, thank youfor the compliment, but tell me
something I can use.
It's like, actually, I found awhole new career when I was just
actually going throughmenopause and it had to do with
these things that my friendskept saying oh, you're so good
(24:12):
at that, and I dismissed anddismissed and then, until it
came right up in my face, I gooh, that fits with this and
that's how this works.
And it proved to really be amarker sending me in the right
direction on a new career.
But if I hadn't asked.
You know, I just was like, oh,it's just something I do, it's
(24:33):
just something I do, it's notimportant.
What I really work hard at iswhat I'm going to focus on and
it's and we're missing.
We're missing these amazinggifts that we have, that are
ours to share.
Not everybody has them, so wedo them in our own unique way.
I mean, there may be a lot ofpeople that have, you know,
artistic ability, but nobody'sgoing to express it the way you
(24:54):
would, or I would, or anyoneelse would.
So it's interesting that theseopenings, these open periods in
our lives, it's like those quiettimes.
They pop up and it's almostlike here's a little window,
okay, are you ready to movethrough it?
And if you don't, you know,maybe a few years before you
(25:15):
feel that again.
So you know it's there waitingwhen you're ready for it.
Mary (25:22):
Yeah, and people, I think, do observe for us things about
us and we may dismiss it becauseit's so much a part of us.
I have had people tell me foryears you need to talk more
about plants.
People will randomly text mequestions about plants and it
lights me up and I thinksometimes too, we believe that,
(25:43):
oh, if I love it, then it's justa hobby or it's not something.
And I think that, listening topeople that we have to hear it
so many times, or if we'reteachers, we can think, oh, we
have that idea of impostersyndrome, which is such an
(26:03):
overused term, but we only haveto know 10% more than somebody
else.
You know, we don't have to know100%, every single thing and
say we're an expert to be ableto offer that knowledge to other
people.
Anna (26:16):
And we have unique experiences.
I know in my own coachingbusiness, a lot of what I'm
sharing is based on the lessonsthat I've learned and the
multiple times that I've donethis and how I've used intuition
and how I've not used it andthose lessons that have come
with that.
Yes, I have, you know, studiedand done some research and I
love the science behind itbecause it diffuses the woo-woo,
(26:39):
mm-hmm, but a lot of it comesfrom the fact that I've gone
through these experiences andI've learned them and we learn
from each other and sharing eachother's stories, which is why I
love conversations like thisand interviewing people who have
had experiences with intuition.
So it's like reading abiography.
(27:00):
Now, how did you do that?
Okay, I'm going to apply thatto my own life so powerful.
Mary (27:06):
Yeah, power, powerful, yeah, powerful, yeah.
So here's what I want toexplore a little bit, because
fear is real and it serves apurpose.
So I did a little mini episodeon this, like I mentioned I did.
My minis are under 10 minutes,so it was just a really quick
snapshot.
But how do you help people whenthey really have trouble
(27:26):
teasing apart?
Is this a legitimate fear?
For instance, I want to changecareers.
Here's what I feel drawn to.
But what about health insurance?
These very practical things?
How do you help people teasethat apart and get through that
and really move into theirintuition?
Anna (27:45):
And that can be a challenge because, again, that's
the rational mind.
Well, but nobody has to be safe, and that's what its job is.
It keeps us safe, it keeps usgoing.
So we have to start bysplitting everything apart.
Okay, what are the concerns?
And breaking it apart I'm a biglist maker, so I love that Pros
(28:06):
and cons, but in a moredetailed way.
It's like if you took this jobor went down this path what are
the perks?
What are you not having?
And if it's insurance, okay,that's a very real concern.
So how can you supplement that?
How can you find another way tomake sure that you're able to
(28:29):
have self-care from inside andoutside?
You know, taking care ofyourself, but also making sure
that you have the supportexternally to do that?
So it's pulling the threadsapart.
You know, like a knotted ballor a necklace that gets tied up.
You start with where, in thecenter of the knot, and you
start pulling the little piecesand then you get those openings,
(28:51):
you get insights and oh yeah,is this really important?
How important is that to you?
If health insurance orsomething else is like nine out
of 10, okay, well, let's addressthat and start diffusing that
you find.
So there's always a solution,that's.
I believe there's always asolution or an opportunity to
(29:12):
find a way to make somethingwork.
But it's pulling it apart, andthen the fear dissipates when
it's when everything's knottedup and clumped up like that.
You's no breathing space,there's no opportunity to see
how it can unwind.
But as you start pulling upthese threads, if you will, and
(29:34):
addressing each one and again,it's starting to pay attention
and with every moment of that,okay.
So how do you feel?
Check in with your body.
Where is that resonating?
Is that?
Is that just?
Is that up here in your chest?
Is it a gut feeling?
Are you just?
Is there anxiety and how?
What?
Where's that coming from?
We start looking at that.
Mary (29:55):
So yeah, and I think too, the idea of let it, let it be
easy, like what are you, what itdoesn't, if it's something that
feels hard, that I really like.
I know I started to follow acertain path because I felt like
I should do this because I canprobably make money sooner, and
I didn't hate it.
(30:15):
But it wasn't my passion.
Follow what I really felt, eventhough that other route that I
felt drawn to in my mind waslike, well, I don't know if I
can really make money, but Ifeel like when you have to make
a living, if you follow yourpassion, then it's first of all,
(30:35):
it's easier, and it's it's.
It's not only easier for you,but I think it's easier to find
success because you believe init.
Anna (30:43):
It's easier to find success because you believe in
it.
You believe in it and you knowour words have energy, our
thoughts are so powerful andwhen you're focused on something
you love, your energy shifts,it just opportunities present
themselves.
You start seeing opportunitiesthat were there but you weren't
(31:08):
necessarily paying attention tobecause it didn't look like it
was going to fit in this littlebox.
So it's kind of breaking downthose barriers too, like I'm
nodding, but letting that spacein to that challenge, that
concern, and there areopportunities in all of that, in
moments, and that wheresomething else will pop up.
Oh, I never, I never, oh, Ididn't think of it that way.
Oh, I never realized that waseven an option.
(31:28):
It's shifting focus but, youknow, tying in with how you're
feeling and where it's where,where it's stuck, and then it's
like, okay, we can address that.
That's just a gut fear.
Where does that come from?
I'm I'm not a psychologist,although I have studied some
psychology, but basic humannature, you know this is could
(31:52):
be something from.
You know, a long time ago thatwas an unpleasant experience.
It's still kind of hangingaround.
It's not valid anymore.
But we're just looking atthings.
We're not analyzing and I'm not.
You know, as I said, I'm notdoing therapy or hypnosis, but
it's.
Let's just take a look at it.
What is that?
What is that and how can weresolve that?
Mary (32:07):
And when we feel unhappy, I think we have urgency, like I
have to figure this out, andthat doesn't help, and I think
as just let it sit and, likeyou're saying, like, make some
notes, observe some things, andwhen you feel that urgency, just
think, okay, I'm just gatheringinformation, I'll figure it out
.
And as we allow that to happen,I think it becomes easier to
(32:33):
recognize oh, this is doable.
And here are the things, asyou're saying, here are the
things that I missed, and Ithink this can actually make
sense for me.
Anna (32:42):
Yep, I mean, just when you talk about stress, even just
saying stress, this is your bodyjust kind of automatically
tighten up.
And when you stop for a minuteand give it that open space,
things open up and loosen up and, yeah, you start seeing things
differently, in a differentlight and opportunities.
They don't they were there allalong, but we start seeing them.
(33:05):
It's not that we're missingthem and we become more open to
oh, oh, oh, I could try that letthe fear dissipates and that's
so powerful to to move thataside and and do that.
And you know, nature is, aswe've mentioned, just a huge way
to start opening that up too,which is why just going for a
(33:26):
walk or floating in a pool ortaking a hot bath and, you know,
relaxing and not have yourphone and just listening to
music, any of those things thatstimulate you and relax, you can
open up that space.
Mary (33:39):
And envision it.
You can envision what you want.
You can, even if you don't knowexactly.
It might be saying it out loudLike I want to be doing work
where I feel, you know,passionate, or I I'm helping
others, and just then let thatsit and sift through it and
really be aware of somethingthat you might.
(34:01):
Or like you talked about otherpeople observing, I think if you
have trusted people in yourlife when they say things, I
mean I remember my husband saidsomething and we've only been
married it's been less thanthree years.
So he came into my life muchlater, at a time when I was
making a big shift in my career,and he said at one point you
(34:22):
know you can always retire early.
And I was immediately like no,I can't.
And what did I end up doing?
Ended up retiring early andeverything fell into place
because of that.
So I think it's one of thosethings sometimes where we don't
always see the options, butsomebody that is standing on the
(34:42):
outside and can see us, that issomething where, instead of
quickly dismissing, just say I'mgoing to sit this over here on
this shelf and I'm going to letit sit there and I'm going to
revisit it in a little bit andsee how it feels, maybe in a
week or whatever.
Anna (35:00):
Yeah, and it doesn't hurt.
Ask your friends, ask thepeople that really know you.
What am I good at?
What am I missing?
What is it that you see that Ido well, that maybe I'm not
paying attention to?
They'll tell you, and they'reusually right.
They're usually right.
(35:20):
The imagining and the sensoryimagination is one of the tools
that I love and I use a lot inmy work.
It's because we know intuitionis speaking to us through our
senses.
Everything's connected in ourbody, everything talks to it.
Everything else can you knowchemically.
And that gut brain theyactually call it the second
(35:43):
brain that gut intestinalelement.
So we can actually reverseengineer.
And you were talking about whatis.
What does the new job look likeIf you can bring more senses
into it?
Let's say you're looking for anew house.
Ok, what's the house look like?
And picture yourself in thekitchen, cooking and
(36:05):
entertaining, fixing your firstmeal for your friends and family
, having a party or walking inthe backyard.
What's the grass feel likeunder your bare feet and the
smell of the flowers that are inthe yard.
The more you can bringfull-fledged feelings and senses
in're essentially reprogramming, you're re-engineering your
(36:28):
brain and your mind goes oh, oh,that's what we're creating.
This is what you want.
Okay, here, come over here.
Here's another idea, but it'sso powerful and our words,
obviously, are very, verypowerful.
So keep the words focused onwhat you want, not what you
don't have.
That's huge.
That's a basic.
(36:48):
But yeah, on my new job, andthese are the amazing people.
And is it in a warehouse or isit in a high rise building or is
it, you know, your own business, and are you sitting in front
of a microphone or what andwhat's that feel like, and
picture your environment.
And well, and just just toreiterate it, our words have so
(37:12):
much power to create.
It's critical that we make surethat we use language that
affirms where we want to go,what we want.
Not.
I know I don't want a job likethat, or I know I don't want to
do this or live here or whateverthat is, and all your brain
(37:32):
hears is, oh, that place or thatjob or that situation.
And that ties in with thesensory imagination to the
language supports it.
Write down what you want.
It.
That's using another sense.
Write the details, exactly whatit looks like, what it feels
like, uh, what, and and again,what?
(37:53):
Do you hear?
The birds singing in the yardor you've got airplanes going by
.
You want to be by anything, anyof that, the sound of the water
, if you want to live on ahouseboat, as much as you can.
But the words, keep your wordsaffirmative and for where you
want to go and what you want toexperience, because your body's
listening, your body's alwayslistening and it's responding
(38:16):
and going oh okay, good, you got, we got.
We got your back.
Mary (38:20):
Yeah, you know yeah, and it's a simple I.
We say it's simple.
I think if you don't think thisway, it can be not simple.
So it's something like insteadof saying I don't ever want a
job again where I'm notrespected, you say I really want
to feel respected in my career.
Anna (38:40):
Or I am so happy to be in a situation where my actions, my
work is respected and I'mtreated with respect and admired
, or, yeah, as if it alreadyexists.
Yeah, very powerful.
Mary (38:58):
Yeah, and the same with relation.
I mean we're talking a lotabout career but with
relationships, if you have had aseries of either friendships
where it was very unequal, oryou've had romantic
relationships that you realizein hindsight were not like, I
have a saying that I love.
That I saw in a meme one timeafter I just got out of a
terrible relationship and itsaid I saw the red flags.
(39:21):
I just thought it was acarnival, and so I think you
know those are the things where,again, pay attention.
But going forward, I mean we cantend to think why do?
I've had many clients say thisto me why do I always attract X,
y or Z?
And it's like, well, let's talkabout what do you want?
Going forward, and so trying tothink in that generative
(39:45):
mindset that I have more controlthan I think, because we tend
to think I don't have anycontrol.
It's happening to me Well, lifehappens through you, not to you
, and for us, yeah, so beingable to think about going
forward, what do I want to bepart of my life?
Anna (40:02):
And how do I want to live my life?
Who do I want in it?
What are the experiences I have?
And you have to have thecourage to, to take action,
intuition speaking to you, butif you don't take action and
that's true with anything I wantI want a new career.
Well, okay, you know, I used tojoke because I, when I had my
(40:25):
import business, I just workedcrazy long hours and it was like
, well, it's me and the UPS man,or nobody he's the only guy
that ever came around because Iwas never out to do that.
So you have to put yourself ina situation and experience where
you can, you know, have theopportunities for that too.
(40:46):
But, yeah, listening, listeningto that and putting, being
aware, yeah, yeah, so we'vetalked about a lot of things.
Mary (40:54):
So if somebody's listening and they're like, okay, I think
I can start to tune into thismore, Do you have sort of some?
Where do they go from here?
What are some action steps thatcan get them more tuned in and
sort of working with theirintuition?
Anna (41:09):
Find silence.
First of all, find moments inyour day Again, even if it's
sitting in your car, before yougo into work or walk around the
block.
Take a minute, take fiveminutes before you jump out of
bed.
Give yourself that luxury.
Move your phone to the otherside of the room so you're not
tempted which I've started doingand it's amazingly helpful and
(41:32):
give yourself those moments.
Pay attention to the senses andthings that are around you and
start tuning in and then trackand I do offer a tracking sheet
if someone wants a toolready-made that talks about all
of the senses and how intuitionspeaks through our senses, and
just something they can startmaking note of.
(41:53):
So I have that available.
But that's first place.
Start listening and respectingwhen those things come, stop and
go.
Okay, what's going on?
Is this fear?
Is this my you know my rationalmind going yeah, but that's not
doesn't feel safe, or am Ibeing kind of directed by my
intuition?
(42:13):
So it's a good first.
First couple of places to start.
Yeah.
Mary (42:17):
Well, this has been a very fun conversation.
Can you tell, can you telleveryone a little more about,
like, what you do and where theycan find you?
Anna (42:27):
Absolutely, thank you.
I am working as what I call atransformational coach, so this
has been my passion for so manyyears and it's taken a while for
me to get to the point where Ihave been able to create this,
where this is what I can do fora living and spend my time
helping others find their ownpassion and their path for the
(42:50):
next stage of their lives.
I can be reached at journey topurpose T-O, spelled out, dot
org.
If you type that in and forwardslash contact to the number two
, you can email me and I'll sendyou a tracking sheet and you're
(43:11):
happy to do that.
I do jumpstart calls.
You can book a call on thewebsite and let's just talk.
Sometimes, you know, it doesn'thave to be a big deal, but it
can take, you know, a shortconversation to even just start
moving in the right direction ofthe new trajectory.
So I happily often notice Ioffer workshops and I speak to
(43:33):
your organization or your groups, if you like, zoom or in person
.
But I and if you want to shareyour stories, if this is
something you've had experienceswith, I'm gathering stories for
a book, so I'd love to have anyof your listeners or viewers
you know, share their storiesand help other women and men as
well, find their own path.
Mary (43:54):
So that's great.
Well, you don't have to writeeverything down that she just
said I will put.
I'll link it in the show notesand thank you.
Thank you so much, Anna, forbeing here.
Anna (44:04):
This has been wonderful.
I could talk about this fordays and it's been just a total
joy talking with you.
Mary (44:11):
And thank you everyone for listening.
If you'd like today's episode,please give me a quick rating,
because it helps other people tofind me.
And until next time, go outinto the world and be the
amazing, resilient, vibrantviolet that you are.
Welcome to No Shrinking Violence.
I'm your host, Mary Rothwell,licensed therapist and certified
integrative mental healthpractitioner.
I've created a space where wecelebrate the intuition and
power of women who want to breakfree from limiting narratives.
We'll explore all realms ofwellness, what it means to take
up space unapologetically, andhow your essential nature is key
(00:28):
to living life on your terms.
It's time to own your space,trust your nature and flourish.
Let's dive in.
Hey, violets, welcome to theshow.
I think women in particular areborn with intuition.
I think it's society's rulesthat make us doubt what we feel
when it comes to intuition andour experience of other people.
(00:51):
First, like their presence ortheir energy, we're taught to be
polite and not make anyone feeluncomfortable.
Yet we're also supposed to beaware of our surroundings and
take action if we feeluncomfortable, sometimes because
of our conditioning to staysmall or not make others feel
any type of way.
We may sense something is a bitoff, but we ignore it.
(01:13):
In the past, there were timeswhen I got a specific feeling
about a person when I first metthem, like an inner shiver.
I used to chalk it up to my owninternal situation Was I just
nervous meeting them?
Was I just having an off day,but later, when I either learned
more about the person or Iinteracted with them more, my
intuition turned out to havebeen correct.
(01:35):
They either weren't a greatfriend or a supportive co-worker
or a well-matched datingpartner.
Often, though, when thishappens, I can't even pinpoint
what it is about them.
That makes me inwardly cringe.
When it comes to situations, Ithink it can be more challenging
to determine what is intuitionlike.
I would love to apply for thatjob, and what is fear?
(01:58):
There is no way I could do thatjob.
Notice that the second thoughtbased on fear isn't that you
don't want the job.
It's fear that you can't do thejob.
Often, intuition feels like fearin the body.
It can make us feel like ourheart is beating faster or our
breath quickens.
When I get excited about a newventure, it's like a little
(02:20):
heart shiver.
Isn't that how fear feels?
Like an internal shiver, but attimes it's been a sign that I
should go for it.
Anyway, I talk about this morein a mini episode episode 38, if
you want to give it a listen,okay.
So my guest today helps peoplefigure all this out how to live
from a place of intuition andmake their dreams into a reality
(02:43):
, to live from a place ofintuition and make their dreams
into a reality.
Anna Quigley has been calledthe intuitive Yoda for her
insights, experience andcommitment to empowering
individuals to find and livetheir unique purpose.
She uses sensory imaginationand quantum mind-body techniques
to assist people in manifestingtheir dreams and the life
they're meant to live.
She's based in SouthernCalifornia and she offers
(03:06):
speaking engagements, workshops,courses and coaching services,
sharing her expertise,experience and insights.
Welcome to no Shrinking Violets, anna.
Anna (03:17):
Thank you so much, Mary.
I'm happy to be here.
Mary (03:20):
Alrighty.
So I often start out withasking my guests to share a
little bit about their own story, because often what we
experience gets us to where weare.
So can you start with sharing alittle about you and how you
learned to trust your ownintuition and how that impacted
your journey?
Anna (03:39):
Well, it's impacted pretty much every part of my life
since I discovered it, if youwill, when I was, I think, high
school, early college, I was sofearful of making a wrong
decision, kind of as you werespeaking what if this doesn't
really feel right, but yet I'mdrawn to it, I'm attracted to it
(04:02):
?
And what if I go this way and Idon't like it?
I felt almost as if, well, thatwas it.
There was only one way.
There's no turning back.
And it's crazy because we're atany moment we can pivot and
shift and switch.
And intuition, learning tolisten to my intuition and that
(04:23):
came from spiritual studies,mind body studies that I started
doing in college and I testedit because I have it.
There's an inner skeptic and,like I know a lot of your
listeners, it's like, yeah, butwhat is this?
Is this my emotion?
Is this really my intuitionspeaking?
I tested it in some silly waysand it was never wrong from my
(04:47):
own experience, never wrong.
So I really started working withit and throughout my life it
has gotten me out ofrelationships that were not
ideal which difficult as it was,significant and into some
amazing jobs and situations that, oh, that's not really what I
(05:09):
want.
My rational mind is fighting onone side, going no.
No, this is your background,this is your experience, but I'm
really drawn here.
Why am I going there?
And jobs that turned out to bephenomenal.
My best jobs were generally theones that didn't, on the
outside, look like that was theperfect fit, but somehow, not
(05:30):
somehow through my intuition,through that inner knowing and
that practice of gettingfamiliar with it, like
recognizing the voice of an oldfriend.
Oh OK, that's what it is.
Discerning the differencebetween that fearful and that,
oh yeah, yeah, this is right.
(05:50):
May not make sense.
I don't necessarily understandit, but I'm going for it, and it
has always led me to the nextgreat adventure.
Mary (06:00):
Yeah, well, I think we I mean I assume, when I say
intuition, that people know whatI mean.
Are you able to define it Likedoes it feel different for
everybody, or do you feel likethere are like common feelings
or threads that we allexperience with it?
Anna (06:25):
And it can show up for each person, and it can show up
daily in different ways.
There's a science behind it aswell.
This is a real thing.
We are all born not just women,although I think we tend to be
more in tune, more open to itbut we're all born with it, so
(06:47):
it's an innate gift that we'regiven, that we can with learn to
recognize and follow moreeasily the science behind it.
If I can go a little geeky forjust a second, we pick up 11
million bits of informationevery single second, and the
piece that really surprised methe most when I was doing my
research is that only 1% of thatis picked up by our brain.
(07:08):
The rest of it's picked up byour senses, so by our gut and by
you know, those little chillsor auditory senses, and it makes
total sense when you startlooking at intuition, which
speaks to us.
It makes itself known throughour senses, that gut feeling
that everybody knows.
(07:28):
Or when you get chills, theconfirmation chills, right,
we've all had that.
Or, and this one, I think too,is more related to women, but
that I just know.
Well, how do you know?
I don't know, but I know, andthere's unshakable confidence in
something.
When that comes through, that'sintuition, that is intuition
(07:51):
speaking to us.
So it could be a repetitivesign that you see that you
didn't notice before, but that'sreassuring, something that you
might be interested in.
Or even when we know, you knowthat little voice, that inner
voice.
Sometimes it's audible, but itcould also be people talking to
(08:12):
you about a particular book or asituation or a trip you should
take in a short period of time,repetitively.
That's kind of a way intuitiongets our attention.
So it comes in different waysat different times and the more
aware we become, the morefamiliar it's like.
Get to know your intuition andhow it speaks to you uniquely,
(08:36):
the easier it becomes, and in myown experience it has never
been anything other than neutral, but so you don't always know
what it's guided you to.
You know, turn left here.
I don't know why I'm turningleft here.
You may have missed an accidentor got stuck in traffic, like I
did recently because I didn'tlisten.
Mary (08:56):
Yeah, well, I've learned.
For me it's sort of a tiny beatof silence.
I know that sounds weird, but Ithink I'm noticing like a micro
expression and every time Ithink back on it, like I think
of situations when I've saidsomething and I know somebody
isn't agreeing, but they don'tsay it.
(09:17):
And it happened a couple timesin job interviews and when I
went back and thought about itI'm like if I had listened to
that beat of silence, I shouldhave followed up and looked at
that person and addressed sortof that unasked question.
And I think it is very easy toignore it or think it's woo-woo
(09:39):
or it's you know.
Of course that's not the case.
So what do you think?
I mean, I talked about sort ofsociety scripts where, let's say
, you are walking down thestreet and you feel just like
not settled.
I think sometimes, if we canthink, all right, I don't want
to cross the street because it'sgoing to look rude or I don't
(10:00):
want to be that person.
So I think sometimes thosethings get in the way of just
listening.
What do you?
Do you agree with that?
Are there other things that cancloud that intuition for us?
Anna (10:13):
I absolutely agree, and it's expectations you mentioned
earlier.
You know, as women, oh, youneed to be polite, you need to
be, you know to behave in acertain way, not be too
aggressive, and we tend to putourselves second.
It's our nature.
We're caregivers.
We do that naturally, innately,but at our own expense, often
(10:38):
Not hearing that or notrecognizing and allowing that
and having the courage,initially, I think it can take,
to honor that, even over thesocietal expectations.
And then, of course, therational mind is which I tease.
I tease my rational mind andstop being a bully, because it's
(11:00):
critical, it wants to keepeverything straight.
So a job, it's critical, itwants to keep everything
straight.
So a job.
Well, you're not, you know,that's not really your
background or that's not reallywhat you said you wanted or
you're really looking for, butyet there's a pull.
And that happened to me withthe job.
It's like why am I?
No, but I keep kept seeing thead and I'm like, just just go
talk to them and it turned outto be one of my, one of my best
(11:23):
dads, even though it didn't fitthe picture.
It didn't fit the picture.
So, yeah, you've got thoseinfluences and and you know the
rational mind and the emotions.
Well, here's what I should do,rather than listening to where
we're really being guided to forour betterment.
For our betterment and I meanbetterment in every way, not
(11:46):
just careers and relationships,but on, my intuition,
streamlines my errands.
Most of the time it's oops,don't forget.
You know that little voice.
It's like, oh, did you forgetyour, your keys?
Or you're walking out the door.
It's like, oh, you forgot,whatever it was, the thing you
need to take to the bank.
Where does that come from?
Mary (12:05):
Yeah.
Anna (12:06):
Where does that come from?
Mary (12:08):
Well, now I think especially our world is so loud
and so fast and we are not oftenmindful.
So you know we've talkedalready about kind of what it
feels like for us.
But how do you help women learnto recognize their intuition?
Anna (12:27):
You talked about that moment of silence, that beat of
silence.
The core is starting to berespectful of your own space,
your own space, quietness.
And that's hard.
When you're running around andtaking care of everyone else and
(12:47):
busy with work and family andeverything else, it's difficult
to find that time.
But it's essential to startlearning to listen, to listen to
those.
Give ourselves the opportunityto take.
It could be sit in your car fortwo minutes before you go in the
house to take care of the kidsand feed you know, get dinner
(13:10):
ready and whatnot.
Sit for two minutes in the carand just be still.
Not the radio, not the phone,not checking text messages, but
just and take a breath and relaxa little bit and see what comes
up.
Meditation, yes, it's notsomething everyone loves to do,
it's not just sitting, you know,oming on a mountaintop.
(13:32):
Take a walk out in nature, walkthrough the park, be still
Something I call the power ofthe shower, and it's not just me
.
There have been all kinds ofamazing inventions that have
come about with people relaxingin the shower.
Because you're tuning out thatrational mind, you're turning
(13:55):
the dial down on that chaos,that noise that's constantly
surrounding us.
So the more.
You can get to moments it'sagain doesn't have to be any
major like sit for an hour andjust find pockets of time to be
still and before you're runningout the door to run errands,
(14:18):
take a minute and just be stilland oh, yeah, I need to grab
that.
Oops, where's my phone?
No-transcript.
(14:48):
Well, I walked in that room andthat person there's just I
don't know what it is.
Or yeah, I'm walking across thestreet.
Something here doesn't feelsafe.
Make a little note.
Oh, what was that?
Did anything happen?
Or did I just feel something?
Or did I just know I needed togo into that store?
(15:09):
And then you run into an oldfriend, or just you know paying
attention, because in you knowtwo hours you're going to have
forgotten about it and whathappened.
So the more you see thatrepetitive pattern, it's another
tool to start recognizing andallowing that tool to start
(15:29):
recognizing and allowing that.
Mary (15:30):
So, yeah, and I think the word meditation feels big and
heavy, but mindfulness isexactly what you're saying, it's
that moment to moment.
So being in the shower likeexperience the lather of the
shampoo, you know what, what isthe conditioner?
Feel like trying, instead ofthinking about all the things to
do that day, just give yourselfthat time to experience.
(15:50):
Or even when I wake up, I trynot to reach for my phone for 10
minutes.
I mean, some people can't, youknow, lounge in bed for even 10
minutes but trying to just letyourself wake up, be aware, take
stock, like what does my bodyfeel like today?
Do I feel rested?
Do I have any aches and pains?
(16:11):
Did I sleep wrong?
You know, looking at the lightcoming through the window,
that's part of also helping ussleep better.
But being in our life andtrying to just take that second
to, maybe it's one breath, youknow, sometimes one breath.
Just being in that moment andrecognizing, like what do I feel
(16:33):
like right now?
Is my jaw clenched?
Am I like my stomach clenched?
Like letting all of that gomakes you more aware of what's
happening intuition wise andalso what's happening around you
.
Anna (16:45):
And important point is the senses.
So feel like what are thesheets?
Feel like this morning is, feelthe weight of the blankets or
the cool air coming from thewindow.
Give yourself that moment inthe morning and that's.
That's really an insightfultime too, because we've shut off
that rational mind, is quietedwith the sleep.
(17:06):
So how many times have we hadthose aha moments when we wake
up with a solution to somethingwe've been trying to figure out
for a while, because we'vequieted that down.
But bringing in all of thesenses and starting the morning
with that and whether that's oh,I can smell the coffee that's
that's brewing downstairs, andreally welcome to that.
And try through all your senses, what am I seeing?
(17:29):
Oh, this wonderful shadow onthe ceiling from the light
coming in from the window and,like you said, the smell of
coffee, or maybe the sound ofthe dogs or, in my neighborhood,
the roosters crowing, you know,next door.
And awaken all your sensesbecause they're going to be your
guide throughout the day for somany things.
Mary (17:52):
Yeah, and you talked about nature.
I'm a big nature girl and Iweave that into my work a lot.
And I you know we are reallypowerful as a species because of
our brain, but it's also thething that often defeats us,
because we think ourselves outof something, or you know, fear
comes from our conditioning.
Our amygdala learns what to beafraid of and then it
(18:15):
extrapolates that to nearlyeverything so that it's to our
detriment.
Nature, and you talked aboutgoing for a walk.
There is nothing that gets youmore in touch with your person
than to put your phone in yourback pocket, put it on, do not
disturb and even if you areoutside, even if you don't want
(18:35):
to walk through the woodsbecause you don't want the bugs
or whatever, sit outside for 10minutes, look at the sky,
observe the clouds, find afavorite tree, Even if you are
living in the city.
When you walk through the city,find a favorite tree, Even if
you are living in the city.
When you walk through the city,find your favorite tree, name
it, Like all of those thingswhere we're connecting to what
we actually are, which is nature, and we forget because we're so
(18:58):
evolved.
But part of that is not beingevolved because when animals
sense, they sense things.
They're not thinking.
I better not go to thiswatering hole because this is
where you know the whateverattacked me the last time.
Anna (19:14):
I think it's they sense when there's danger and we've
become so disconnected from thatand yet we have all of that in
us, those senses, all of that isthere but we have shut them
down and we've got so much noiseand busyness around.
I heard a speech from arecently awarded Nobel Prize
(19:36):
winning scientist recently andone of his students was like oh
yeah, it obviously takes a lotof work.
It's really hard work to do,and he goes.
Yeah, but he says honestly, Iget my best ideas when I'm
running around Torrey PinesState Park, letting all of that
go.
He goes.
That's where the juices startflowing.
The creativity, I mean therational mind and the organized
(19:59):
it keeps us organized.
But those senses, that time innature look at that beautiful
leaf on the ground and the dewon the flowers hugging your
favorite tree I love that.
Finding your own tree andnaming your own tree.
I'm going to do that in myneighborhood.
So I love that, that connection.
It just.
(20:19):
It takes a split second to dothat, but it awakens and
stimulates that activity andallows our intuitive thoughts
and energy and feelings to beseen and recognized more easily.
Mary (20:35):
Well, and I think when we're young, we do it
instinctively.
We know what we likeinstinctively, we know what
books we like, or we know whatsports, or we know if we don't
like sports, or we want to playthe violin, or you know, I think
about that before all thesocial scripts happen that girls
aren't supposed to do thisthing, or I think that we just
naturally know those things, butthen we lose it as we get older
(21:02):
.
Anna (21:02):
Or we're conditioned out of it.
Well, no, that's not.
Oh, I love poetry.
Well, yeah, you're not going tobe a poetry major in college,
what are you going to do withthat?
Or an artist or some of theother things?
It's like, no, it has to bepractical.
But those yearnings, thoseurges, stay with us, they don't
(21:23):
go anywhere.
And it comes a point in ourlives and quite often it's
midlife and beyond and beyondwhen those start coming up again
, because maybe the kids are outof the house, or you've done
your career and you're ready forchange, but they start
percolating and start bubblingbecause they don't go away,
(21:44):
those desires and those thingsthat we love.
They get suppressed perhaps,but you know they're always
there waiting.
It's like okay, are you readyfor me?
Are you ready for it now?
And oftentimes it's even abetter time because we have, you
know, wisdom and a little morecourage and faith in our own
(22:05):
abilities.
Mary (22:07):
Yeah, and we don't.
Often, I think, as women, whenwe think about something like
menopause, I think we're like,oh, I don't want to go through
it, or these.
We focus on the changes and Ifeel like it's.
You know, these things aregoing to happen and I know, as
someone who's certified infunctional nutrition and having
gone through it myself, thereare things to make it way better
(22:28):
.
But I think, once we getthrough those things and we've
done a lot of what areprescribed as life tasks we've,
you know, completed an education, maybe we've had a career,
maybe we've raised childrenwe're moving through that and I
think we then have that abilityto start to look inside a little
more, like what is my nextthing that I want to achieve?
(22:51):
I think we have that gift andwe often focus on what we look
like, because we're aging and weknow our skin is different and
we gain weight and we can't docertain things, and those are
the things that we can't change.
Anna (23:05):
But there's certain things , and those are the things that
we can't change, but there's, Ithink, a huge gift that we get,
when we get to that part of life, agreed, we've got wisdom,
we've gotten more clarity, wehave a better sense of what's
really important to us.
What makes me sad, when I hearit, is when women will say, oh,
I think I'm too old, it's toolate to change, and they're 50,
(23:28):
or they're 60 even, or 70 even.
It's like no, if you're beingcalled to do something, we're
all here for specific purposesand we all have innate gifts and
as women, we tend not to payattention to the things that
come easily, the things that arejust oh yeah, I mean, I've had
(23:52):
my own.
You know.
Friends say to me oh, you're sogood at this.
I mean, thank you, thank youfor the compliment, but tell me
something I can use.
It's like, actually, I found awhole new career when I was just
actually going throughmenopause and it had to do with
these things that my friendskept saying oh, you're so good
(24:12):
at that, and I dismissed anddismissed and then, until it
came right up in my face, I gooh, that fits with this and
that's how this works.
And it proved to really be amarker sending me in the right
direction on a new career.
But if I hadn't asked.
You know, I just was like, oh,it's just something I do, it's
(24:33):
just something I do, it's notimportant.
What I really work hard at iswhat I'm going to focus on and
it's and we're missing.
We're missing these amazinggifts that we have, that are
ours to share.
Not everybody has them, so wedo them in our own unique way.
I mean, there may be a lot ofpeople that have, you know,
artistic ability, but nobody'sgoing to express it the way you
(24:54):
would, or I would, or anyoneelse would.
So it's interesting that theseopenings, these open periods in
our lives, it's like those quiettimes.
They pop up and it's almostlike here's a little window,
okay, are you ready to movethrough it?
And if you don't, you know,maybe a few years before you
(25:15):
feel that again.
So you know it's there waitingwhen you're ready for it.
Mary (25:22):
Yeah, and people, I think, do observe for us things about
us and we may dismiss it becauseit's so much a part of us.
I have had people tell me foryears you need to talk more
about plants.
People will randomly text mequestions about plants and it
lights me up and I thinksometimes too, we believe that,
(25:43):
oh, if I love it, then it's justa hobby or it's not something.
And I think that, listening topeople that we have to hear it
so many times, or if we'reteachers, we can think, oh, we
have that idea of impostersyndrome, which is such an
(26:03):
overused term, but we only haveto know 10% more than somebody
else.
You know, we don't have to know100%, every single thing and
say we're an expert to be ableto offer that knowledge to other
people.
Anna (26:16):
And we have unique experiences.
I know in my own coachingbusiness, a lot of what I'm
sharing is based on the lessonsthat I've learned and the
multiple times that I've donethis and how I've used intuition
and how I've not used it andthose lessons that have come
with that.
Yes, I have, you know, studiedand done some research and I
love the science behind itbecause it diffuses the woo-woo,
(26:39):
mm-hmm, but a lot of it comesfrom the fact that I've gone
through these experiences andI've learned them and we learn
from each other and sharing eachother's stories, which is why I
love conversations like thisand interviewing people who have
had experiences with intuition.
So it's like reading abiography.
(27:00):
Now, how did you do that?
Okay, I'm going to apply thatto my own life so powerful.
Mary (27:06):
Yeah, power, powerful, yeah, powerful, yeah.
So here's what I want toexplore a little bit, because
fear is real and it serves apurpose.
So I did a little mini episodeon this, like I mentioned I did.
My minis are under 10 minutes,so it was just a really quick
snapshot.
But how do you help people whenthey really have trouble
(27:26):
teasing apart?
Is this a legitimate fear?
For instance, I want to changecareers.
Here's what I feel drawn to.
But what about health insurance?
These very practical things?
How do you help people teasethat apart and get through that
and really move into theirintuition?
Anna (27:45):
And that can be a challenge because, again, that's
the rational mind.
Well, but nobody has to be safe, and that's what its job is.
It keeps us safe, it keeps usgoing.
So we have to start bysplitting everything apart.
Okay, what are the concerns?
And breaking it apart I'm a biglist maker, so I love that Pros
(28:06):
and cons, but in a moredetailed way.
It's like if you took this jobor went down this path what are
the perks?
What are you not having?
And if it's insurance, okay,that's a very real concern.
So how can you supplement that?
How can you find another way tomake sure that you're able to
(28:29):
have self-care from inside andoutside?
You know, taking care ofyourself, but also making sure
that you have the supportexternally to do that?
So it's pulling the threadsapart.
You know, like a knotted ballor a necklace that gets tied up.
You start with where, in thecenter of the knot, and you
start pulling the little piecesand then you get those openings,
(28:51):
you get insights and oh yeah,is this really important?
How important is that to you?
If health insurance orsomething else is like nine out
of 10, okay, well, let's addressthat and start diffusing that
you find.
So there's always a solution,that's.
I believe there's always asolution or an opportunity to
(29:12):
find a way to make somethingwork.
But it's pulling it apart, andthen the fear dissipates when
it's when everything's knottedup and clumped up like that.
You's no breathing space,there's no opportunity to see
how it can unwind.
But as you start pulling upthese threads, if you will, and
(29:34):
addressing each one and again,it's starting to pay attention
and with every moment of that,okay.
So how do you feel?
Check in with your body.
Where is that resonating?
Is that?
Is that just?
Is that up here in your chest?
Is it a gut feeling?
Are you just?
Is there anxiety and how?
What?
Where's that coming from?
We start looking at that.
Mary (29:55):
So yeah, and I think too, the idea of let it, let it be
easy, like what are you, what itdoesn't, if it's something that
feels hard, that I really like.
I know I started to follow acertain path because I felt like
I should do this because I canprobably make money sooner, and
I didn't hate it.
(30:15):
But it wasn't my passion.
Follow what I really felt, eventhough that other route that I
felt drawn to in my mind waslike, well, I don't know if I
can really make money, but Ifeel like when you have to make
a living, if you follow yourpassion, then it's first of all,
(30:35):
it's easier, and it's it's.
It's not only easier for you,but I think it's easier to find
success because you believe init.
Anna (30:43):
It's easier to find success because you believe in
it.
You believe in it and you knowour words have energy, our
thoughts are so powerful andwhen you're focused on something
you love, your energy shifts,it just opportunities present
themselves.
You start seeing opportunitiesthat were there but you weren't
(31:08):
necessarily paying attention tobecause it didn't look like it
was going to fit in this littlebox.
So it's kind of breaking downthose barriers too, like I'm
nodding, but letting that spacein to that challenge, that
concern, and there areopportunities in all of that, in
moments, and that wheresomething else will pop up.
Oh, I never, I never, oh, Ididn't think of it that way.
Oh, I never realized that waseven an option.
(31:28):
It's shifting focus but, youknow, tying in with how you're
feeling and where it's where,where it's stuck, and then it's
like, okay, we can address that.
That's just a gut fear.
Where does that come from?
I'm I'm not a psychologist,although I have studied some
psychology, but basic humannature, you know this is could
(31:52):
be something from.
You know, a long time ago thatwas an unpleasant experience.
It's still kind of hangingaround.
It's not valid anymore.
But we're just looking atthings.
We're not analyzing and I'm not.
You know, as I said, I'm notdoing therapy or hypnosis, but
it's.
Let's just take a look at it.
What is that?
What is that and how can weresolve that?
Mary (32:07):
And when we feel unhappy, I think we have urgency, like I
have to figure this out, andthat doesn't help, and I think
as just let it sit and, likeyou're saying, like, make some
notes, observe some things, andwhen you feel that urgency, just
think, okay, I'm just gatheringinformation, I'll figure it out
.
And as we allow that to happen,I think it becomes easier to
(32:33):
recognize oh, this is doable.
And here are the things, asyou're saying, here are the
things that I missed, and Ithink this can actually make
sense for me.
Anna (32:42):
Yep, I mean, just when you talk about stress, even just
saying stress, this is your bodyjust kind of automatically
tighten up.
And when you stop for a minuteand give it that open space,
things open up and loosen up and, yeah, you start seeing things
differently, in a differentlight and opportunities.
They don't they were there allalong, but we start seeing them.
(33:05):
It's not that we're missingthem and we become more open to
oh, oh, oh, I could try that letthe fear dissipates and that's
so powerful to to move thataside and and do that.
And you know, nature is, aswe've mentioned, just a huge way
to start opening that up too,which is why just going for a
(33:26):
walk or floating in a pool ortaking a hot bath and, you know,
relaxing and not have yourphone and just listening to
music, any of those things thatstimulate you and relax, you can
open up that space.
Mary (33:39):
And envision it.
You can envision what you want.
You can, even if you don't knowexactly.
It might be saying it out loudLike I want to be doing work
where I feel, you know,passionate, or I I'm helping
others, and just then let thatsit and sift through it and
really be aware of somethingthat you might.
(34:01):
Or like you talked about otherpeople observing, I think if you
have trusted people in yourlife when they say things, I
mean I remember my husband saidsomething and we've only been
married it's been less thanthree years.
So he came into my life muchlater, at a time when I was
making a big shift in my career,and he said at one point you
(34:22):
know you can always retire early.
And I was immediately like no,I can't.
And what did I end up doing?
Ended up retiring early andeverything fell into place
because of that.
So I think it's one of thosethings sometimes where we don't
always see the options, butsomebody that is standing on the
(34:42):
outside and can see us, that issomething where, instead of
quickly dismissing, just say I'mgoing to sit this over here on
this shelf and I'm going to letit sit there and I'm going to
revisit it in a little bit andsee how it feels, maybe in a
week or whatever.
Anna (35:00):
Yeah, and it doesn't hurt.
Ask your friends, ask thepeople that really know you.
What am I good at?
What am I missing?
What is it that you see that Ido well, that maybe I'm not
paying attention to?
They'll tell you, and they'reusually right.
They're usually right.
(35:20):
The imagining and the sensoryimagination is one of the tools
that I love and I use a lot inmy work.
It's because we know intuitionis speaking to us through our
senses.
Everything's connected in ourbody, everything talks to it.
Everything else can you knowchemically.
And that gut brain theyactually call it the second
(35:43):
brain that gut intestinalelement.
So we can actually reverseengineer.
And you were talking about whatis.
What does the new job look likeIf you can bring more senses
into it?
Let's say you're looking for anew house.
Ok, what's the house look like?
And picture yourself in thekitchen, cooking and
(36:05):
entertaining, fixing your firstmeal for your friends and family
, having a party or walking inthe backyard.
What's the grass feel likeunder your bare feet and the
smell of the flowers that are inthe yard.
The more you can bringfull-fledged feelings and senses
in're essentially reprogramming, you're re-engineering your
(36:28):
brain and your mind goes oh, oh,that's what we're creating.
This is what you want.
Okay, here, come over here.
Here's another idea, but it'sso powerful and our words,
obviously, are very, verypowerful.
So keep the words focused onwhat you want, not what you
don't have.
That's huge.
That's a basic.
(36:48):
But yeah, on my new job, andthese are the amazing people.
And is it in a warehouse or isit in a high rise building or is
it, you know, your own business, and are you sitting in front
of a microphone or what andwhat's that feel like, and
picture your environment.
And well, and just just toreiterate it, our words have so
(37:12):
much power to create.
It's critical that we make surethat we use language that
affirms where we want to go,what we want.
Not.
I know I don't want a job likethat, or I know I don't want to
do this or live here or whateverthat is, and all your brain
(37:32):
hears is, oh, that place or thatjob or that situation.
And that ties in with thesensory imagination to the
language supports it.
Write down what you want.
It.
That's using another sense.
Write the details, exactly whatit looks like, what it feels
like, uh, what, and and again,what?
(37:53):
Do you hear?
The birds singing in the yardor you've got airplanes going by
.
You want to be by anything, anyof that, the sound of the water
, if you want to live on ahouseboat, as much as you can.
But the words, keep your wordsaffirmative and for where you
want to go and what you want toexperience, because your body's
listening, your body's alwayslistening and it's responding
(38:16):
and going oh okay, good, you got, we got.
We got your back.
Mary (38:20):
Yeah, you know yeah, and it's a simple I.
We say it's simple.
I think if you don't think thisway, it can be not simple.
So it's something like insteadof saying I don't ever want a
job again where I'm notrespected, you say I really want
to feel respected in my career.
Anna (38:40):
Or I am so happy to be in a situation where my actions, my
work is respected and I'mtreated with respect and admired
, or, yeah, as if it alreadyexists.
Yeah, very powerful.
Mary (38:58):
Yeah, and the same with relation.
I mean we're talking a lotabout career but with
relationships, if you have had aseries of either friendships
where it was very unequal, oryou've had romantic
relationships that you realizein hindsight were not like, I
have a saying that I love.
That I saw in a meme one timeafter I just got out of a
terrible relationship and itsaid I saw the red flags.
(39:21):
I just thought it was acarnival, and so I think you
know those are the things where,again, pay attention.
But going forward, I mean we cantend to think why do?
I've had many clients say thisto me why do I always attract X,
y or Z?
And it's like, well, let's talkabout what do you want?
Going forward, and so trying tothink in that generative
(39:45):
mindset that I have more controlthan I think, because we tend
to think I don't have anycontrol.
It's happening to me Well, lifehappens through you, not to you
, and for us, yeah, so beingable to think about going
forward, what do I want to bepart of my life?
Anna (40:02):
And how do I want to live my life?
Who do I want in it?
What are the experiences I have?
And you have to have thecourage to, to take action,
intuition speaking to you, butif you don't take action and
that's true with anything I wantI want a new career.
Well, okay, you know, I used tojoke because I, when I had my
(40:25):
import business, I just workedcrazy long hours and it was like
, well, it's me and the UPS man,or nobody he's the only guy
that ever came around because Iwas never out to do that.
So you have to put yourself ina situation and experience where
you can, you know, have theopportunities for that too.
(40:46):
But, yeah, listening, listeningto that and putting, being
aware, yeah, yeah, so we'vetalked about a lot of things.
Mary (40:54):
So if somebody's listening and they're like, okay, I think
I can start to tune into thismore, Do you have sort of some?
Where do they go from here?
What are some action steps thatcan get them more tuned in and
sort of working with theirintuition?
Anna (41:09):
Find silence.
First of all, find moments inyour day Again, even if it's
sitting in your car, before yougo into work or walk around the
block.
Take a minute, take fiveminutes before you jump out of
bed.
Give yourself that luxury.
Move your phone to the otherside of the room so you're not
tempted which I've started doingand it's amazingly helpful and
(41:32):
give yourself those moments.
Pay attention to the senses andthings that are around you and
start tuning in and then trackand I do offer a tracking sheet
if someone wants a toolready-made that talks about all
of the senses and how intuitionspeaks through our senses, and
just something they can startmaking note of.
(41:53):
So I have that available.
But that's first place.
Start listening and respectingwhen those things come, stop and
go.
Okay, what's going on?
Is this fear?
Is this my you know my rationalmind going yeah, but that's not
doesn't feel safe, or am Ibeing kind of directed by my
intuition?
(42:13):
So it's a good first.
First couple of places to start.
Yeah.
Mary (42:17):
Well, this has been a very fun conversation.
Can you tell, can you telleveryone a little more about,
like, what you do and where theycan find you?
Anna (42:27):
Absolutely, thank you.
I am working as what I call atransformational coach, so this
has been my passion for so manyyears and it's taken a while for
me to get to the point where Ihave been able to create this,
where this is what I can do fora living and spend my time
helping others find their ownpassion and their path for the
(42:50):
next stage of their lives.
I can be reached at journey topurpose T-O, spelled out, dot
org.
If you type that in and forwardslash contact to the number two
, you can email me and I'll sendyou a tracking sheet and you're
(43:11):
happy to do that.
I do jumpstart calls.
You can book a call on thewebsite and let's just talk.
Sometimes, you know, it doesn'thave to be a big deal, but it
can take, you know, a shortconversation to even just start
moving in the right direction ofthe new trajectory.
So I happily often notice Ioffer workshops and I speak to
(43:33):
your organization or your groups, if you like, zoom or in person
.
But I and if you want to shareyour stories, if this is
something you've had experienceswith, I'm gathering stories for
a book, so I'd love to have anyof your listeners or viewers
you know, share their storiesand help other women and men as
well, find their own path.
Mary (43:54):
So that's great.
Well, you don't have to writeeverything down that she just
said I will put.
I'll link it in the show notesand thank you.
Thank you so much, Anna, forbeing here.
Anna (44:04):
This has been wonderful.
I could talk about this fordays and it's been just a total
joy talking with you.
Mary (44:11):
And thank you everyone for listening.
If you'd like today's episode,please give me a quick rating,
because it helps other people tofind me.
And until next time, go outinto the world and be the
amazing, resilient, vibrantviolet that you are.
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