Why You’re Always Distracted and How to Come Back to What Matters

In a world overflowing with pings, pop-ups, and endless scrolls, staying focused has become harder than ever. This episode of None But Curious explores distraction not as an enemy to fight, but as a signal to listen to — a gentle tug reminding us to return to what truly matters.

We dive into the deeper meaning of distraction: not just the digital kind, but the subtle drift away from ourselves that leaves us feeling busy yet strangely empty. Through reflection, research, and small everyday practices, this episode helps you rediscover presence in a culture designed to keep you scattered.

What we explore in this episode:

• What distraction really is — and why it’s not always a bad thing

• How the “attention economy” shapes our habits and emotions

• Why focus isn’t about perfection or discipline, but freedom

• Six gentle tools to reclaim your attention with awareness and intention

• The power of small rituals to ground you in daily life

• How to reshape your environment to naturally support focus

• The importance of rest, wandering, and knowing your “why”

Author Johann Hari calls distraction a collective condition, not a personal flaw. Understanding that truth changes everything. Instead of blaming ourselves for losing focus, we can meet distraction with grace — learning to notice, reset, and return to what nourishes us.

From mindful morning rituals to the science of attention, this episode offers a roadmap for reconnecting with yourself in the age of overwhelm. You’ll walk away with simple, compassionate practices that help you find stillness in the noise — and rediscover meaning in the small moments that make life feel whole.

If you’ve ever caught yourself scrolling when you meant to rest, multitasking through conversations, or ending the day feeling scattered, this episode is for you. Learn how to turn attention into an act of devotion — to your work, your relationships, and your own inner life.

Listen to “Why You’re Always Distracted and How to Come Back to What Matters” to learn:

• How distraction can be a mirror for your unmet needs

• Why attention is like sunlight — and how to choose what you want to grow

• Practical ways to be more present, calm, and creative

• How to live with intention in a world built to steal your focus

Subscribe to None But Curious for more thoughtful conversations that explore the extraordinary in the everyday. Each episode invites you to slow down, reflect, and reconnect — with curiosity, compassion, and wonder.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Welcome to the None But Curious podcast. We're all about finding inspiration in life's uncertainties.
Whether you're still figuring things out, questioning your beliefs, or just curious
about the world, come hang out with us as we celebrate the beauty of not having all the answers.

(00:22):
Hey there, welcome back to None But Curious, where we explore the extraordinary in the everyday.
Today we're talking about something that affects every single one of us,
distraction. And I don't just mean the kind that comes from checking your phone every few minutes,
though, yeah, that's part of it. I mean distraction in a deeper sense,

(00:43):
the kind that pulls us away from ourselves, that scatters our attention so thin,
it's really hard to remember what matters. So in this episode, we're going to explore three
questions. What is distraction really? Why does it matter for our personal and spiritual growth?
And what tools can we use to meet it with gentleness instead of frustration?

(01:06):
At its simplest, distraction is anything that pulls our attention away from what we actually
want to be doing or experiencing. Sometimes it's external, the constant ping of notifications,
the auto-playing videos, the endless scroll of headlines and updates. The world we live in is
noisy by design. But distraction is also internal. Our minds wander, we replay old conversations,

(01:31):
plan for tomorrow, or spiral heavily into what-ifs. And that's not always a bad thing.
Daydreaming, reflecting, and wandering thoughts can be creative and restorative.
But when distraction becomes our default mode, when our attention is constantly elsewhere,
it starts to leave a mark. We end the day feeling busy, but strangely empty,

(01:54):
as though we've been living at a distance from ourselves.
Here's why this matters. What we pay attention to shapes our lives. Attention is like sunlight.
Whatever we shine it on grows. If our focus is constantly hijacked by distractions,
our deeper values like connection, creativity, and rest start to fade into the background.

(02:18):
We might still be productive, still moving, still doing things, but it's scattered movement.
It's activity without depth. And this just isn't a personal struggle. It's cultural. The attention
economy is real. Every app and platform we use is designed to compete for our focus.

(02:39):
Our distraction isn't a flaw. It's a feature of the world we live in. So when we talk about
reclaiming attention, we're not talking about perfection or discipline. We're talking about
freedom. Freedom to choose where we place our energy. Freedom to be present for the life that's
actually happening right here, right now. Let's talk about some gentle, practical ways to work

(03:05):
with distraction. And I do mean with it, not against it. Number one, notice without judgment.
The first step is awareness. So often we get frustrated with ourselves for losing focus.
Say things like, why can't I stay present? Why can't I finish this? But distraction isn't failure.

(03:27):
It's simply the mind doing what minds do. Instead of scolding yourself, just notice.
Oh, look where I've wandered off to. That moment of noticing is powerful.
And that's the moment you return. Two, clarify your intention.

(03:48):
Distraction thrives in uncertainty. If you start the day without a clear sense of what matters most,
every ping and pop up notification will feel equally urgent. Try pausing before you dive in
and ask, what do I most want to give my attention to right now? That simple question creates an
anchor. Even if you drift, you know where to return. Three, create small grounding rituals in

(04:16):
your day. You don't need anything elaborate, just moments that bring you back to yourself.
Try stretching before you open your laptop, take a slow sip of water between tasks,
or write a line of gratitude in your calendar before the day begins.
These everyday gestures remind your mind and body, you're here. This matters. Rituals like

(04:39):
these turn routine moments into points of calm and focus. Four, shape your environment.
This is both a mixture of ancient wisdom and modern science. Our surroundings influence us.
If you want fewer digital distractions, move your phone out of reach while you work.

(05:01):
If you want to read more, keep a book where you can see it. If you want to rest, make your space
feel calm and restful. You don't have to fight your willpower if you design your environment
to support your attention. Five, allow space for rest and wandering. Here's a paradox,

(05:21):
when we try to force focus and attention, it slips away. Our minds need time to rest,
drift, and reset. So schedule your focus and rhythms, work, then walk, concentrate,
then stretch. Sometimes the best way to refocus is to step away. Attention is a living thing.

(05:44):
It needs both movement and stillness. And six, remember your why. When you notice your attention
drifting, take a breath and ask yourself, why does my focus matter right now? Maybe it's so you
can finish your work and actually relax later. Maybe it's so you can listen fully when your

(06:07):
child tells you about their day. Or maybe it's just to feel calmer and more in control instead
of so scattered. Your why reconnects you to purpose. It transforms focus from a task into
an act of devotion. Now we can't talk about distraction without talking about our phones,
right? Let's be real. Our phones are built to hook us in. Every ping, scroll, and notification is

(06:34):
designed to grab our attention and keep us there. It's not that you lack willpower, it's that the
tech is doing exactly what it was made to do. So rather than blaming ourselves, we can approach
technology with intention. Maybe that means turning off notifications, setting app limits,
or declaring certain hours as phone free. Maybe it's as simple as charging your phone in another

(06:59):
room at night. Author Johann Hari, in his book Stolen Focus, writes that our struggle to
concentrate isn't a personal flaw, it's a collective condition. We live in systems designed
to pull our attention in every single direction from the devices in our pockets to the pace of
modern life itself. Hari writes, "the truth is that you are living in a system that is pouring acid

(07:23):
on your attention every day and then you are being told to blame yourself and to fiddle with your own
habits while the world's attention burns." Seeing it that way changes everything. It means our
distraction isn't proof that we're failing, it's proof that we're human and we're living in a world
that makes focus really hard and from that place we can meet ourselves with a little more grace.

(07:47):
We can take small steady steps to reclaim our attention, putting the phone down during breakfast,
closing extra tabs on our laptops or our iPads, or giving one task our full care and attention
for a little while. So what does all of this look like in practice? It might mean stepping outside
for a few minutes, noticing the wind, the sky, even the sounds around you before starting your day.

(08:14):
It could be fully listening when someone talks to you without glancing at your phone or your watch
or even thinking about your next task or savoring the first few bites of your breakfast or your
lunch, paying attention to the taste and the texture instead of scrolling. Small moments like
these help retrain the mind, they remind us what it feels like to be truly present.

(08:39):
Attention is like a muscle, the more we use it intentionally the stronger it becomes.
Distraction isn't the enemy, it's simply a signal, a little tug reminding us that our minds are tired
or our hearts need tending or our attention has wandered from what nourishes us.
Instead of fighting distraction, we can learn from it, we can notice what it's trying to tell us.

(09:05):
Maybe it's pointing to exhaustion, maybe we are craving play, maybe it's just time to breathe
and zone out for a second. Our attention is limited but it's also incredibly powerful
and every time we bring it back we practice living with more presence, more care, more connection.

(09:28):
So maybe the invitation today is simple, reclaim one small piece of your attention from distraction
and give it to something that feeds you, a walk outside, a conversation that makes you laugh
or leads you to learn something new, a few quiet minutes of doing absolutely nothing.

(09:49):
Those small moments of presence, they're where the meaning grows.
Thank you for giving some of your attention here with me today. If this episode resonated,
share it with someone who could use a gentle reminder that their focus is a gift. Subscribe
to the None But Curious podcast and you can be sure to get distracted in a few weeks with a

(10:11):
new episode. Until next time, notice your attention and give it to what truly matters to you.