Gentle Parenting

What really is “gentle parenting” when you have African parents? 

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Because ain't nothing but a cheap bang baby to blow
them jeans.
So we crazy Death grow againstthe label that pays man
Unfatable.
So please don't try to fakethis.
But I'm back to the lecture athand.
Back to the lecture or legendat hand.
So there was.

(00:20):
I would classify myself as avery intergetic, very, very high
energy, very action oriented,little to no thinking child, but
who always was trying topractice the sport he loved, or

(00:44):
the sports I loved, in a way.

Speaker 2 (00:49):
Now that I think about this, did we ever say that
we was going to make this aPatreon exclusive?
Or did we say one day, no?

Speaker 1 (00:57):
what will we be making a Patreon?

Speaker 2 (00:58):
exclusive story Because it's a good story.
No, I feel like that'ssomething we talked about, but
either way, continue so how arewe going to make this a?
Patreon exclusive if we tellingit right now.
Yeah, I mean, I just feel likewe had a conversation about it
before, but I feel like this isfine.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
This is fine, but also we don't have anything in
the vault right now.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
I mean no, no, no, that's fine.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
And why are you popping on the?
Okay, well, anyways, back towhere I was.
Where was I?
Oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
I was a high energy right.

Speaker 1 (01:30):
Very short attention span, very active, always wanted
to be outside type of kid.
But one thing about me is, whenI found a sport that I loved, I
was going to practice it.
Nah, stop, 24, 7, anywhere Icould get it in.
And at the age I will say aboutnine, ten is you know I was

(01:57):
starting to fall in love withthis sport called baseball.
So much so that I don't knowhow I came into this bat, a
wooden bat at that, because weonly had a metal, was it?

Speaker 2 (02:16):
Oh it was a wooden bat.
It was a wooden bat.

Speaker 1 (02:21):
You want to hit the mic because that's you two for
two.
Okay, I you popped in my mouthwith because you did that,
whatever thing, and you know I'mlistening to the audio.
And now you screaming on themic.

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Am I.

Speaker 1 (02:37):
Anyways, it was a wooden bat and we still have the
aluminum bat from back in theday.

Speaker 2 (02:42):
Do we?

Speaker 1 (02:45):
Yeah, it's somewhere in that backyard or somewhere in
the garage.
But, shumbo, let me focus.
I was a kid.
I was trying to get, I wastrying to get good at baseball.
So I thought, naturally, to getmy swing better.
I got to learn how to swing abat that is heavier than what I
typically swing with when I'm inthe games, when I'm at practice

(03:06):
, because I want to get strongerand I wanted to have a faster
swing.
You know, make sense, right?
You know, I was trying to belike those cats in the gym that
be having a dumbbells and theybe doing all the punching work.
You know, you all know what I'mtalking about.
So they have faster hands.
Or if you, if you, the realones, know, if you are a track
runner, you would take yourdumbbells and you would be in a

(03:28):
mirror practicing your run instride with the dumbbells, so
you could.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
I don't think you knew that at eight years, seven
years, nine years, ten years,although.

Speaker 1 (03:38):
I was doing.
I was doing it to get better.

Speaker 2 (03:40):
OK.

Speaker 1 (03:41):
And maybe I was ahead of my time.

Speaker 2 (03:43):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (03:43):
But anyways, y'all know I did this.
I did this thing where I wouldpractice in the front of my
house and I would just swing thebat.
I was swinging the bat forliterally like 30 minutes 10
hour Just swinging a bat and Iwould just be like cool, working
on my, working on my approach,all these things.
And I was, you know, I wasn'teight, yummy, because I wasn't

(04:05):
playing baseball.
I was playing baseball in thirdgrade, third, third grade, so I
was about nine or 10.

Speaker 2 (04:10):
Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 (04:11):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (04:12):
OK.

Speaker 1 (04:13):
I'm just saying it's a big difference.
Yes, because I didn't play Tball, I went straight to fast
pitch eight to nine is a big, isa big job.
It's a big difference when youwent from.
Most people go T ball.
Then they go to fast pitch orlive pitch baseball.
I started at live pitchbaseball.

Speaker 2 (04:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (04:30):
Exactly so.
Anyways, I got this wooden batthat I could barely swing, but
after about 20 minutes my bodyadjusted and I could swing.
So now I'm swinging, I'mswinging, I'm swinging, and my
mom and dad swinger, whatever.
Yeah, my mom and dad had this,this really nice Toyota Ford

(04:52):
runner.

Speaker 2 (04:53):
Nice yeah, the green joint.

Speaker 1 (04:55):
Yes, that was.
It was nice before it becameold Nice.
It was actually my favorite carthat they had actually.
Really, I love driving in thatToyota for a runner, did you
yeah?

Speaker 2 (05:04):
Why.

Speaker 1 (05:05):
I just, I just like I like the feeling of driving and
a big body.
No, I like the feeling offeeling tall because you had to
get up.

Speaker 2 (05:12):
Yeah, that's what it was.
Yeah, so here I am swingingthis back.
So would you ever get like abig, a big car?

Speaker 1 (05:19):
No, OK, no, no, that wouldn't do anything for me.
Now.
I'm tall as hell.
I don't want to.

Speaker 2 (05:24):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:24):
I don't want to have to jump to get up into my which.
I really don't understand whypeople do that, but that's not
my business.

Speaker 2 (05:30):
I would like to be like above, like so I could see,
because sometimes I feel like Ican't see for real and I hate
when I'm driving and the car infront of me is taller than mine
and I can't see in front of them.
No, I like being on the ground,but I do like my car.
But Shumbo let me play out thescene.

Speaker 1 (05:46):
OK, because we get along with you.

Speaker 2 (05:47):
Yeah, you get along with.
No, you keep interjecting me.

Speaker 1 (05:50):
Well, because, because what exactly?

Speaker 2 (05:53):
Come on with the story.

Speaker 1 (05:55):
So here I am swinging this bad has been about 20
minutes, not getting story, notgetting tired and I'm by this
green Toyota Ford runner Ifyou're Nigerian, we all know the
car because I know everybodyand their mama had a forerunner.
I'm swinging the wooden bat andI'm getting closer and closer
to the front of the car and theheadlight, the driver side

(06:18):
headlight and my ass was noteven thinking about it.
Of course, because I'm young,I'm trying to get in the zone.
I'm sad.
I'm trying to be Barry Bonds atthis time, or at that time it
was probably Juan Pierre orAlfonso Serrano, derek Lee,
what's its name?
The first?

Speaker 2 (06:39):
time I saw some no Bill Cosby, no Justin Timberlake
, I don't know, I'm just namingpeople because you just name it
people.

Speaker 1 (06:47):
No, these are actual baseball players.

Speaker 2 (06:48):
OK, well, anybody, not everybody know actual, I
think his name is Ryan Phillips.

Speaker 1 (06:53):
He was the first baseman for the Phillies.
He was left handed but he was ablack baseball player, but I
could be off, but anyways,jackie.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
Robinson Daisy, come on now.

Speaker 1 (07:03):
Was he alive while I played?
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (07:05):
No, no, but anyways you can't idolize people who are
dead.

Speaker 1 (07:10):
No, because I didn't get to watch them play.
How do you sound oh?

Speaker 2 (07:14):
that's why.

Speaker 1 (07:15):
That's why Michael Jordan is not my goat.
I don't care about that man.

Speaker 2 (07:18):
Oh, who's your goat?

Speaker 1 (07:18):
LeBron James.

Speaker 2 (07:19):
LeBron James.

Speaker 1 (07:20):
Anyways, you are sidetracking.

Speaker 2 (07:23):
LeBron.

Speaker 1 (07:23):
James, Anyways.
So here I am swinging his bat.
I'm swinging his bat, wegetting closer and closer to the
driver's side headlight.
And then one time I was likeI'm in my head.
I was, I was getting pitched, Igetting a pitch thrown to me.
I was like I'm going to hitthis out the park.
So I take a really big swing.
And on my swing back I heardcrack.

(07:44):
And here you know, I bust thewhole front tail light headlight
.
Headlight Busted it.
And what did I do?

Speaker 2 (07:57):
I bought me no, no, no, that was not who I was as a
child.

Speaker 1 (08:03):
I actually try to hide the evidence, like my
parents would have noticed.
Interesting, I really try tohide the evidence.
I try to hide the bat.
Yeah.
I tried to hide the glass, yeah, almost as if I didn't see they
was going to notice that they,that they headlight was out.
But isn't that who I am?
Yeah, yeah.
So, yeah, so I try to hide it,because I was going to tell the

(08:23):
big gulp story too.
Yeah, but we already told that,you guys.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
We already told that.
You got to go back to that.
You got to go back to thatpodcast.

Speaker 1 (08:30):
I can't remember which podcast I told a big gulp.

Speaker 2 (08:32):
But yes, that was real, that's when we went to New
York.
Yeah, yeah, that's when we wentto New York.
Get us out of here.
That's like one of our highestdownloaded downloaded podcast
episodes.
It's because the story was fire.
Yes, a really good story.
Go back and listen to thatseason one.

Speaker 1 (08:47):
So here I am.
I thought I did a good jobhiding all my evidence, so
naturally, when I got back inthe house, it's still the middle
of the day and our parents usedto leave us alone all the time.
So, the one thing I made surenot to do was to tell, was to
tell Yemi, because she a snitch.

Speaker 2 (09:04):
No, I was actually there when it happened.

Speaker 1 (09:06):
No, you were not.

Speaker 2 (09:06):
Yes, I was.

Speaker 1 (09:07):
You were not.
Where was I?
You were inside the housebecause you didn't.
Why would you watch me swing abat for hours?
That's what you did.

Speaker 2 (09:14):
No, you weren't swinging it for hours, it was.
The thing about it is youweren't even by yourself, like
you had a couple of your friends.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
No I did not.

Speaker 2 (09:21):
I'm going to tell Deji this is what happens when
you tell stories that are thatfar in the past I'd be having to
like let you tell the story.
And then, when I tell the story, you'd be like oh yeah, that's
actually what happened, becausemy memory is just, is just
superfluous.

Speaker 1 (09:37):
Sure go, because now we're making of words.

Speaker 2 (09:39):
I'm just doing what you do.

Speaker 1 (09:40):
Tell the story Johnny .

Speaker 2 (09:42):
So the way I've seen it is like we, like our parents
yes, like they just said used toleave us at home by ourselves
for hours on end while theyworked.
That's just a lot of foreignkids experience.
So like we used to have peoplecome into like filter in our
house in and out all the time alot of times, because our house
was always just no rules.

(10:04):
Anyway, like Deji said, he hada couple of his friends over and
they were outside and thegarage door was open.
I might have been like in andout because during the summer
this was in the summer I was ona couch glued watching TV, but I
think I might have came outbecause, you know, deji was with
his friends and, yes, there wasa wooden bat that one of his

(10:24):
friends I brought over.
It was not, it was not sure it'sbecause, yeah, you, you, we
didn't have it so and he wasjust swinging the bat and he
just ended up getting too closeto the car.
And I feel like we all saw ithappen before it happened,
because it was like why are youthis close to the car with this
bat?
But you just, you know, youweren't thinking and he cocked

(10:46):
it back and then, actually, Imay have not been outside, but I
feel like I saw, like I mighthave not been outside the whole
time, but I literally rememberyou swinging the bat back and I
was, and I feel like I even toldyou like Deji, move before and
you were like no, yummy, I knowwhat the fuck I'm doing, like
you always do.
And yeah, you just swung yourstuff back and you just cracked

(11:09):
it.
I'm sorry, the story wasn'tanti-climactic.
You already told them, or?
I'm sorry, the story wasanti-climactic.
You already told them whathappened.

Speaker 1 (11:17):
I don't think that.
I think it played out the way Isaid, which is I did exactly
what you said.

Speaker 2 (11:22):
I just remember that it was one white boy that was
over here.
He had a big like somethingabout him, looked like due from
Dexter's laboratory to me, hislike arch nemesis, the one with
the big head, man dork, man dork, whatever his name was.
That's what I envisioned withthe white boy that used to come
to our house looked like.
That's what the guy looked likeWithout the glasses, just the

(11:47):
big head and the haircut mandork so yeah, and Savan is in my
head as well too, so I feellike yeah, I don't think they
would, but I do remember hidingeverything.

Speaker 1 (11:57):
I remember it was like.

Speaker 2 (11:58):
I was like when we was young and Deji used to get
in trouble, I used to reallyfeel bad for him, but like, at
the same time and the same tokenif I'm speaking like Deji I
fully always tried to get aheadof it.
Like anytime Deji was going toget himself into trouble, I like
warned him, I let him know, Iwould say, hey, like I was I've

(12:21):
always been which is funny nowbecause the roles are reversed
I've always been a voice ofreason for Deji and his
frivolous behavior.
So, like, I would always say,like I don't think or you know,
like I just was a person who wasvery anxious, and still I am in
a different way.
But yeah, like I just rememberlike being like I think you

(12:41):
should like go in the grass anddo that.
He was like no, you don't do it, I'm doing it.

Speaker 1 (12:45):
And you did it.
I definitely did it.
I was swinging the hell out ofthat bat, for almost 20 minutes
and nothing happened.

Speaker 2 (12:52):
But then when I came outside, I said Deji, you
probably shouldn't be doing this.

Speaker 1 (12:56):
No, but also the reason why I know for a fact
that I try to hide it, becauseyou're saying it, because of
your anxiety, because the thingabout it is Yemi's anxious
nature made you it, made youreal quick to be like, oh, deji
did it or Deji did this.
I know y'all remember the story.

Speaker 2 (13:14):
I'm not giving my ass beef for nobody.

Speaker 1 (13:16):
I know y'all remember the story when I told you about
how I wanted them damn powerbands.
And Yemi, oh, here's Stitchinto the whole motherfucking
neighborhood.
I didn't say it.
I didn't say it.
I just I didn't say it.
What did you say?
What did you say?
No, no, no.

Speaker 2 (13:27):
I didn't snitch.
I just did not go withouthiding it Because I did not
snitch.
My mom was not a dummy.
That's the problem.
You think you can outsmartpeople, which is why you're
trying to hide broken glass froma headlight.
My mom was not a dummy.
She saw you, she, earlier inthe day.
You asked her to buy the bandsfor you.
She said no, you come home thesame day.

(13:49):
The band is on your arm.
She put two and two together.
She didn't put two and twotogether.

Speaker 1 (13:54):
It got four she don't pay attention to be like that.
She don't pay attention to belike that she really don't.

Speaker 2 (13:58):
I mean at the end of the day, but when she said
something about it, I did notdeny it.
That's what you did, no becauseyou said something when you
bring something to somebody'sattention?

Speaker 1 (14:07):
I didn't.
That's what happened.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
Okay, but what happened with this?
What happened with the?

Speaker 1 (14:10):
Constitution.
So this situation right, let'stalk about it.
Obviously I cleaned everything,I made sure everything was good
and I was like it don't lookthat bad, right?
Obviously everybody in theirmama they lying to me like, nah,
bro, you'll be able to get awaywith it.
But in my head I was like, yes,up, because I've done this so
many times.
There has been so many things.
From the time that I was aboutmommy, from the baby, from the

(14:35):
very first time we moved here, Ihave been steadily breaking and
fucking shit up in this house.
My dad used to get mad at mebecause for at least once a week
I would spill water.

Speaker 2 (14:47):
So I was not coordinated.

Speaker 1 (14:51):
I was not coordinated at all, so I had to learn how
to hide my fuck ups.
I've broken doorknobs, I havebroken glass, I have broken
plates, I have brokenelectronics.
There are so many things myparents don't know.
So in my head I was like thisis a regular ass day, but

(15:11):
obviously I didn't know how muchToday was not that day.
But also people be knowing theyfucking cars right.
Obviously.
And it's a headlight.
Duh, I'm not a child, I don'tknow that about cars.
So then, you know, my parentscome through and I'm chilling,
I'm minding my own business, I'macting like nothing happened
and me and Yemi are Yemi'swatching something and

(15:32):
immediately niggas came in.
That bitch it was that's notthe door, that's footsteps.
Dad yelling who broke theheadlight.
I was like I was looking around.
I ain't saying nothing.
I literally did not.

(15:52):
I'm a stone cold killer.
I don't give a.
You're gonna have to kill me Toget that information.
You're gonna have to kill me.
So I'm over here, my dad isfuming.
He's like what happened?
What happened to the headlights?
Who could do this to my car?

Speaker 2 (16:13):
So I'm trying so hard .
How could somebody do that?

Speaker 1 (16:19):
So I'm trying so hard .
I'm trying so hard not to giveit away.

Speaker 2 (16:29):
I was trying so hard, I was like I don't know.

Speaker 1 (16:33):
I don't know who.
You think it was me.
You think it was me?
No, no, you're bad.

Speaker 2 (16:38):
You're bad, that's how they knew it was him,
because he over here enactingyour by accident.
No, he don't even do that at 10years old.
But I did not tell, so I waslike I was okay, so can I say
how I think it went happened?

Speaker 1 (16:53):
And I think you said, I think you snitched on me.

Speaker 2 (16:55):
No, I don't think I snitched, but I think you like
you.
I really feel like youconfessed and then you remorse.
I don't remember.
I'm just gonna tell it in andI'll let you.

Speaker 1 (17:06):
That might be possible.

Speaker 2 (17:07):
I'll let you fill in what you think.
I feel like you ended up liketelling them what happened and
you went out there to reenactwhat happened and you was like
oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (17:15):
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's exactly what I did.

Speaker 2 (17:18):
Yeah.
So then you went out there withthe bat and you showed them
what happened, because you waslike, I think after a while you
was like, oh, it was an accident.
And our parents don't know whatthat word is.
They don't, you're right.
That's exactly what it was,yeah they don't know what that
word is.

Speaker 1 (17:30):
I said it was an accident.
I snitched on myself because Itried to get it.
That was when I tried to getahead of the bullet, but I did
hide all the evidence.

Speaker 2 (17:37):
I did.

Speaker 1 (17:38):
And I was like.
I was like it was just anaccident.
They would say how is it anaccident?

Speaker 2 (17:43):
That's not such a thing as an accident.
So like you have to be smart,that in.

Speaker 1 (17:48):
And then they were like why were you swinging the
bat by the car Right?
And I was like well that's theonly space of it.
They were like there's a whole,you know the whole yard, and I
was like I was just going.

Speaker 2 (17:59):
But to be quite honest, we probably didn't have
room in the driveway becausethen they had all these fucking
cars.
So it's like you know I don'tknow about anybody else, but
like, like, I feel, likeeverybody know a Nigerian person
that every time you see them,they in a new car.

Speaker 1 (18:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:14):
And like that was our dad for a while.
Like I don't know how heacquired these cars, but like
every couple of months or everyyears or so, he would have a new
car and they would never be new, they would always there was
always be something wrong withthem, but like every car was
nicer than the last one.
But yeah, either way, like thedriveway may have been full,
which is why you weren't like inthe grass, or like at the end

(18:36):
of the driveway, like out of theway of the cars, or like in the
grass or something, but eitherway continue.
Yeah, so like what happened,like when they found out, oh,
that might be something foul.

Speaker 1 (18:46):
Yeah, that man put he taught me a new one.
Honestly, though, I'll say thisyou deserved it.
I mean no, because I'm a childand I we don't make good
decisions, but if I look at thegrand scheme of ass whoopings
that I got some epic asswhoopings like I used to think
about there's so many times, andthat's what we talking about.

(19:09):
Yeah, Today.

Speaker 2 (19:11):
I mean we got we.
It took us a while to get there, but we talk about today's
episode is about ass whoopings.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
It took it I, and I think about this a lot because I
used to get my ass whoop a lotlike a lot Like y'all.
If y'all think y'all parentswas mean, y'all should have been
in my house.
So I used to get my ass be somuch.
I got my ass be by my mom's.

Speaker 2 (19:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (19:31):
I got my ass.
I remember one day where I gotmy ass be by my mom's and my dad
, that's what you got, like yougot your ass be so bad by mom.
And I also been.
I also have my ass be by myolder brother.

Speaker 2 (19:43):
So like for me no not .
But you want one.
I remember the one time you gotyour ass be so bad by mom and
then, like mom told dad, andthen dad be Joe, yeah, yeah, and
that was the worst.

Speaker 1 (19:55):
I was like.
I was like this is, this isactually like y'all need to call
DCFS, because I was somebody.
I was and I and I realized, Irealized it, be it stopped
becoming ass whoopings becauseit seemed like they was doing it
just to get their frustrationout, which is fucked up.
It's crazy and we'll talk aboutthat later in the episode.
But I really got some math,some ridiculous ass whoopings,

(20:18):
like when I told y'all, I'm notfucking used to get an ass
whooping for spilling water,yeah, and then they wonder why
we're so astray from them now.
But yeah, I only say thatbecause it's just weird, because
for me for the longest time Iwas like I thought that was
normal.
You know what I'm saying?
To get your ass be yeah.

Speaker 2 (20:39):
I mean, I don't.
I never thought that corporalpunishment was something you
like.
That's the only way we know,like that's literally the only
thing we knew because I'mthinking about the one time and
even like some shows A lot ofshows don't show it now, but I
feel like when we grew up likeno, honestly, I don't think I
watched any TV shows where theirparents would beat their ass.

(21:01):
Like you know, white people,white parents, did you get your
ass be?

Speaker 1 (21:03):
No way, look, I don't .
Then I watered your ass.

Speaker 2 (21:05):
Um, yeah.
I feel like you didn't get introuble a lot.

Speaker 1 (21:11):
Like for real.

Speaker 2 (21:13):
I started getting in trouble in school.
So, like, anytime I would getin trouble in school, yes, when
I come home I'll get my ass beat.
Because it's like why are youchosen?
Trouble in school?
Yeah, go ahead to learn.
But then that ended up becominglike a system, like a
systematic issue, so it was likeyeah, my dad realized it was
just like oh, they just don't.

(21:33):
That's just.
That's just what it is.
And I think like it didn't stopfor real until high school, but
by the time it stopped I wasalready too old, like our
parents really like stop even,really, yeah.
Like by the time I got to mysenior year I really like never
gotten trouble, literally Like Inever got in trouble and I was

(21:58):
just trying to get out asquickly as possible, like I was
on my way out the door.
So, but I feel like from likeelementary school, by the time I
started coming into my ownvoice and like who I was, like
elementary school until like,yeah, like my senior year of
high school, I was getting introuble at school and then like
I would get home, like I wouldget in trouble at home.

(22:18):
But, daisy, we're gettingtrouble at home, and then that's
what we'll call some big as wedon't.

Speaker 1 (22:22):
Yeah, yeah, I just was just like I didn't care.
Yeah, quite simply, I thought Iwas grown at a young age.
You couldn't tell me nothing.
I remember one time where I hadI don't know what I did, but I
might have spoken back to my momand dad and my dad heard about

(22:46):
it, and then I was so mad at mymom that I slammed the door.
And when I say that man came upwith the quickness with a
rubber sandal Boy, it got.
It did get to the point where Idid think it was like a little
extreme.
And I'll say it because Iremember one time they had beat

(23:07):
my ass so bad.

Speaker 2 (23:08):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (23:09):
That I had to go to school with a long sleeve shirt
on, and it didn't make nofucking sense because I had well
done my shit.
Oh my gosh, oh my God, let mesay it.

Speaker 2 (23:17):
Okay, so one time I got in trouble in school and I
don't even remember what thefuck it was for.
I think it was because I thinkit was because I got like a bad
grade in something or like ateacher left a bad note and I
did not show my parents and itwent on for so long.
It went on for so long and wenton for so long and they're like
hey, like did you show yourparents?

(23:38):
You need your parents signature?
And I was just like no,whatever, I think I actually
like threw it away.
And then they finally like sentsomething else home and they
was like make sure you show thisto your parents.
Or they called my dad orwhatever.
So like I didn't have the paperfor him to sign.
So my dad like beat my ass,literally, put belts in my hands
.
My hands were red, fucking likeon fire.

(23:59):
I might have had like Mark'swelts wherever on my legs, on my
body, wherever he beat me withthe belt.
And then he literally told mehe said go to school and show
them your hands and let themknow that I got the letter or
whatever.
I cannot I'm not making this upand I'm sorry, I triggered.
I triggered it.

Speaker 1 (24:17):
I get triggered?

Speaker 2 (24:19):
Yeah, of course I'm sorry, I should have given you a
word.
It's something like that.
You know, there's not one inthe podcast where we be warned
the office shit.
But like I literally I mean ofcourse I did not show them my
hands.
I think he just like wrote anote in my notebook or something
.
Am I like what they call themAssistant notebooks or something
like that.
Yeah, I think he just wrote anote in there like letting them

(24:40):
know that he got the message andthat I got the message.
But yeah, like he literally waslike, oh, yeah, go to school
and show them your hands, orsomething like that.
And then my mom was like no, no, no, no, do that, because
they'll call whatever, yeah,yeah.
But yeah, that didn't even beatthe bricks off my ass and I was
like what the fuck?

Speaker 1 (24:56):
Yeah, no, I keep, I keep and.

Speaker 2 (24:59):
I remember that was a bad day for me for real,
because I had like rashes allover my legs.
So I was already going throughit, like I was already in so
much pain and I don't know whatthe rashes were from, but like
my legs were already like redand I was trying to use that as
sympathy.
My parents not that nigga didnot give a fuck.
He's still be my ass.

(25:20):
I'm like I'm already in painand I'm just crying and crying
and crying, like yeah, and thelife is so fucked up.
Now that I'm just thinking aboutthis story like, oh my gosh, we
really went through it.
I mean, yeah, but part of itwas I mean I know I didn't
deserve that ass, but not badfor real, like there's nothing I
could have happened.

Speaker 1 (25:39):
I remember bragging about SB so bad that dad, my dad
or our dad.
He apologized because it waslike I said, I was a very I just
was one of them kids that like,like you really couldn't like I
was acting like I was a grownman at like seven.
Yeah, we grew up really fastyeah.

(25:59):
So like I remember one time Ihad lied to like a camp, a camp
counselor or whatever, or astaff member that we was at some
after school program, and I didit with a straight face and I
did not feel no remorse.
And then he was like are youlying?
I was like, no, I just I'mtelling you the truth.
But then he found out I waslying, yeah.

(26:20):
I'm gonna fucking snitch to mydaddy.
Yeah, took me to the store,maybe take a switch.
Yeah, mom.
No, it was.
Dad knows mom.
They all the same to me now.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (26:33):
No, I remember this day, I remember.
So, yeah, go ahead.

Speaker 1 (26:35):
It was it was dad.
No it was dad.
No, it was dad.
And the store picked my switch.
It was mom, it was dad.
It was mom, it was dad.

Speaker 2 (26:46):
It was mom.

Speaker 1 (26:46):
It was dad.

Speaker 2 (26:47):
Would you like me to tell the story, or we're gonna
keep going?

Speaker 1 (26:49):
back for another story.

Speaker 2 (26:50):
So, yeah, like all that happened and then mom came
to pick us up from safe Remembershe came to pick us up in a
Toyota Camry and your ass wasdoing whatever the fuck you was
doing in the car and she stoppedthe car, got out, picked up a
branch and then was beating youwith it, like stopped.
Like I remember I rememberwe're like over there by

(27:12):
Glenbrook that she stopped.
I could tell you exactly whereit was when she stopped.
She got out of the car andstarted being you with the
branch and then in the store,yes, with the same branch, was
being you in the back and I wasjust like sitting there.
And then, yes, when you gothome, that was the time where
you got to ask me to get him bydad Once, once he got back from
wherever he was.
Yes, oh, wow you know the goodthing like.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
I blocked it out.
Yeah, I, lowkey, blocked it out.

Speaker 2 (27:34):
No, it was.
That was a very traumatic.

Speaker 1 (27:37):
I, lowkey, blocked no because you said it and I'm
like it's coming back.

Speaker 2 (27:40):
Yeah, waves, I was you know, like the one thing
that we would do is like if youwere lucky and you got in
trouble on the weekend, youcould like get away with, like
not getting in trouble with herdad because he would go out,
like he would work like Friday,saturday and come back Sunday.
So that's when you wouldconsider yourself lucky because,
like you could, you was goodfor the weekend until like
Sunday.

(28:00):
But yeah, she was.
We used to be like oh okay, Idon't got to deal with this
until like Sunday.

Speaker 1 (28:07):
Yeah, I don't, I don't.

Speaker 2 (28:10):
I don't want my kids to be afraid of me.

Speaker 1 (28:13):
I don't even know if I was afraid.
I just feel like I felt like itwas lazy.
Honestly, I felt like it wasjust lazy because after you feel
like disappointing your kids.
No, I feel like being their assis lazy because you're already
a lot of energy.
You're no, because you'realready starting.
You do mess with kids.

Speaker 2 (28:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:31):
And I don't mean sorry.
You've been around kids so youknow how strong and you know
what it takes to actually hurtthem.

Speaker 2 (28:38):
Yeah, exactly yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:39):
So I think after a while I was just like you're
just taking the easy way out,You're not talking to me, You're
not doing anything.

Speaker 2 (28:45):
That's just how they, that's just what they know,
though.

Speaker 1 (28:47):
No, I'm not saying it because of that, because I'm
saying because you know I got.
I got to the point where I waslike sure you could beat me up
because I was like you know Iwas right.

Speaker 2 (28:57):
I was like.
I thought it was gonna be like,yeah, we'll get that, Okay,
stick with us.

Speaker 1 (29:01):
I'm sorry, because this is why I was trying to turn
it so I was.
I was, although I did not givea fuck.
Yeah, I was a very spitefulperson.
Exactly.
I used to be so catty.
I said if you're gonna fuck meup the whole house, I'd be like,
shut your mouth.
I'd be like I'll be doingeverything, hyperventilating,

(29:25):
all that shit.
I give no fuck.
I was like nigga, you're gonnahear me, you're gonna hear me.
And that was all I did.
I said if you want to put thatwork in, guess what?
I'm gonna put that work in too.
I said God gave me this voicefor a reason.

Speaker 2 (29:41):
I'm laughing because it's so true.
I used to be, like they do,fireball and like, calm down,
it's not that serious.

Speaker 1 (29:46):
No, it was dead ass and I would look at, I would
look at every.
I wouldn't even be crying, nomore.
I would just be like, because Iwas, I was real pressed.
I was like, if y'all go keepbeating my ass, I'm gonna make
sure, I'm gonna make sure y'allhate, y'all get to the point
where you hate it.
No, this is so true Because Iwas younger and I can say this

(30:12):
to this day when I was young.
I was like the pettiest personon earth, like there was nothing
in this world that I would notget back.

Speaker 2 (30:19):
Yeah, you did something, I'm gonna get you
back.
You're gonna feel it too, forshow.

Speaker 1 (30:25):
I was like I'm going straight to the floor, I don't
give no, no, because I, the wayI used to be, I'd be crying,
drooling everything, snoteverything.
I'd be like look I, look you go, you go.

Speaker 2 (30:43):
I used to be like, look at me suffering.
Please, you still gotta beat me.
I used to puppy dog eyes.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (30:52):
I, it was, it was a mistake, I apologize.

Speaker 2 (30:54):
I'm sorry I won't do it again, am I?
That's it.
You won't do it again,absolutely.
Oh.
Whatever the fuck you weresaying, I know you won't, I'm
still going to beat you to likehuh, and me I be, I be I be and
me I be blocking.

Speaker 1 (31:09):
He said move your head out the way I be like no, I
be like no I was.
I said I I'm not taking no ass.
I got to the point where I waslike I'm not taking no more ass,
no Like for real.

Speaker 2 (31:20):
Do you remember the last time you got your ass?

Speaker 1 (31:21):
beat.
Yeah, I was in high.
It was in high school.
Yeah, what happened?
It was when.
What was it really ass beating?
But it was when I spoke up,because you lost your phone.

Speaker 2 (31:32):
Oh yeah, yeah, that was like the last time you got
your ass beat.

Speaker 1 (31:35):
Yeah, so I yeah me had lost her phone and my dad
had hit her calling her stupidor all those things, and I
literally said straight up I waslike dad, that's not right.
Right and why are you gettingupset or it's not?
It's an accident.

Speaker 2 (31:46):
Yeah, and he's like shut up.

Speaker 1 (31:47):
Nobody was talking to you and he literally slapped me
across the face and I was, likeyou, still wrong.
Yeah, and I was like you andthen he beat my ass after that,
but I was like it is what it is.

Speaker 2 (31:56):
It is what it is.
Yeah, it is what it is.

Speaker 1 (31:58):
It is what it is.
I was like.

Speaker 2 (31:59):
I was like so and that's the crazy thing about it,
though Like we're having theseconversations, we're seeing her
having these conversations.
Like if we were to talk to ourparents about this, what do you
think they would say?

Speaker 1 (32:08):
Like that's just how no, they would say they did it
because they loved us.
That's okay.
Remember, hey, you rememberwhen I, when I reminded Tunde
about how he beat me up, yeah,yeah, because I said I wasn't
going to mop the floor.

Speaker 2 (32:21):
Yeah, tunde be acting oblivious because he got,
because he got kids now.

Speaker 1 (32:25):
He's like, he's like.
I never beat you up.
I said to the please to the youyou beat.
You beat me like I was a grownman.

Speaker 2 (32:31):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (32:32):
And he was like, oh, did I really?

Speaker 2 (32:34):
I said everybody blocking shit out, they remember
we, we, the only motherfuckersthat got to remember.
I'm not a motherfuck that gotto remember the hell I said.
I said hell yeah, I was likewhat do you like do?

Speaker 1 (32:45):
do, do, do, do.
You ain't never go talk to melike that.
I said hold on.

Speaker 2 (32:50):
He was just mad at the world.

Speaker 1 (32:51):
Hold on.

Speaker 2 (32:52):
Yeah, you see people was taking a frustrating and I
think that's the main reason why, like now, I can like,
compartmentalize my, my feelings, my emotions, because I never
want any of my emotions towardsa specific situation to affect

(33:12):
somebody else.
I might have not, I might havenot done the best job of it in
the past, but I feel like, likenow I'm more aware of it, like I
don't want to project.
I hate, I hate being a personwho projects.

Speaker 1 (33:26):
Yeah, I just if I think about it just holistically
, I don't think like Corporatepunishment to the degree that we
got.

Speaker 2 (33:35):
There is corporate punishment too.
We'll talk about that.

Speaker 1 (33:38):
Corporal punishment to the degree that I had really
made sense, because it wasn'tgetting through to me, because,
at the end of the day, becauseyou were still in your SP and
then you was being petty rightback.

Speaker 2 (33:47):
Like everybody gonna have to hear me cry and you can
put the volume up on the TV ifyou want to.
And I was still crying overthis motherfucking volume that
you put up on the TV.

Speaker 1 (33:54):
Because I think they would do too.

Speaker 2 (33:55):
They would beat us, and then they would act like
they didn't just beat us.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
Yeah, or they would apologize.

Speaker 2 (33:59):
And the worst thing, oh my goodness and I know we
talked about this before, I knowwe have the worst thing that
would happen is when our momwould set us up.
Oh, scheister.
Excuse me like our mom wouldset us up and snitch to our dad.
I don't know why.
Maybe she felt like it madetheir relationship closer,
whatever but then, like when hewould start to beat us, she'd be

(34:20):
like, which means it's enough.
It's enough, stop, stop, stop.

Speaker 1 (34:25):
And I'm like you should be saying that.

Speaker 2 (34:26):
And now I'm looking at her right in the eyes while
this nigga beat me Like bitch.
This is your fault now, bitch,but like this is your fault.
This is the reason why I'mgiving beat like this.
So, yes, keep slashing me.
Keep slashing me, and I'mlooking at you See you would do
that whole psychological beat itnever, worked.

Speaker 1 (34:41):
It never worked.

Speaker 2 (34:42):
It never worked.
You got to.
I should have been playing yourgame.

Speaker 1 (34:45):
Yeah, because I'd be doing that.
They'd be watching some movie,they'd be watching sports and
here in the background, Iremember one time dad beat me up
and he started watching theCubs game and I cried through
the whole entire Cubs game.

Speaker 2 (35:00):
Oh, that hit us with that game, you know baseball
longest fuck.

Speaker 1 (35:04):
I was crying for three hours.
I said we ate.
I said like.
I said, I did not.

Speaker 2 (35:09):
I didn't get no sleep because of y'all Y'all not
going to get no sleep because ofme.

Speaker 1 (35:13):
But I used to love it because after that I would go
to sleep.
So would you.

Speaker 2 (35:19):
You could have just no, you know that would like,
and I feel like that release wasalso good too, Because that
breathing oh, it would be thedeepest, you would be in the
deepest.

Speaker 1 (35:28):
I'm mad.

Speaker 2 (35:29):
I mean, I love it it takes a lot of energy to cry.
It takes a lot out of you.

Speaker 1 (35:31):
Yeah, just like it take a lot of energy to beat
somebody up.

Speaker 2 (35:34):
But I'm sure they went to sleep just fine.
Of course they did theyprobably slept a little bit
better because they got to takeout whatever frustration they
was going through for that day.

Speaker 1 (35:43):
Yeah, I'm sure they did that.
They used me as a punching bagor whatever the hell you want.

Speaker 2 (35:47):
But yeah, like I don't plan on using gentle
parenting with my children, Idon't think there's any point to
corporal punishment.
I'm all like you might getslept on your booty once or
twice Like hey, love taps forreal.

Speaker 1 (36:01):
For the back of the hand.
Yeah, type shit, but I want,but I already know I'm not going
to even put hands to mydaughter.

Speaker 2 (36:08):
No, I want it to be to the point to where I can look
at my kid Yep and just if Ilook at them and they know that
they are in trouble.

Speaker 1 (36:20):
Me is just even the body posture.

Speaker 2 (36:22):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (36:22):
If I do something and they like.
Oh daughter.

Speaker 2 (36:24):
But one thing I'm not going to do is I'm disappointed
in you.
I never gave a fuck about that.
I remember one time but by thetime our dad stopped beating us
for real and he would haveconversations with us about the
stuff that we were doing.
I remember one time he was like, or we had asked him for some
money for some groceries Like mymom was traveling and we needed

(36:47):
to cook and we went over thereand asked him for some grocery
money and he was like you guysare disappointed in me asking me
for money.
I said I don't give a fuck,give me the money.
I literally said that too.
I said I don't give a fuck.
I said I don't give a fuck,give me the money so we can go
buy these groceries.

Speaker 1 (37:03):
The way our parents used to shave us, and we would
just bat it off, like yours.

Speaker 2 (37:06):
Yeah, we really, I really we'll make you think I
can fuck what you got upsetabout how you feel about that.
I really don't give a fuck.
Are you going to give me this$20 so I can go buy these
groceries, so we can eat, so wecan have some shit to eat?
Or are you just going to bedisappointed looking at me
through this?

Speaker 1 (37:22):
last.
Yeah, I think they think it'sfunny because when you look at
it it's like they think they didsuch an amazing job and I was
like you might have did insooner.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
You did, I did.
Yeah, you did, I did.

Speaker 1 (37:35):
But I don't know you giving yourself a Grammy.

Speaker 2 (37:37):
I'm saying people want and I said we was going to
talk about this and I feel like,ok, let's bring it up right now
you need to make sure, beforeyou start looking back at your
life and you start going totherapy and you start like not
saying, don't do all thosethings, definitely go to therapy
and start looking back at yourlife, but you need to, like for
real, have a serious assessmentof your parents and be like did

(38:01):
these motherfuckers actuallywant kids?
Like, did these motherfuckersactually want kids or did they
just have kids because societytold them that's what they're
supposed to do?
Because if society told themthat they're supposed to have
kids, they probably weren'tequipped or really gave a fuck
about you to have you.
So it's like you need to that.
And if that's the case, thenyou can't take anything that

(38:22):
they did to you they said to youthe way they treated you,
personal, because they was neverin it to really I'll poke back.

Speaker 1 (38:30):
I'll poke back Because, yes you, they might
have not wanted you, but at theend of the day, if you have
something as your responsibility, it's your job to take care of
it?

Speaker 2 (38:42):
Yeah, but I mean, some people have children and
resent them.
Yeah, but and that's the worstthing you could do- but that's
not, that's so.

Speaker 1 (38:49):
that's what I'm trying to say.
It's not.

Speaker 2 (38:50):
I don't think that's what happened in our case to a
small extent, but I feel like,yeah, like in certain instances,
if your parents never Like, Ifeel like being a parent parents
, excuse me is a commitment andfor as big as the commitment it
is, I feel like people don'ttake it serious.

Speaker 1 (39:12):
What I was saying is everybody can be a parent.
Well, I don't want to say it inthat way.

Speaker 2 (39:18):
No, I mean like yeah, not in a way.

Speaker 1 (39:19):
I guess anybody can because of adoption, but because
they?

Speaker 2 (39:22):
make that hard.
I'm just saying, like, theability to have children is very
easy and fulfilling, and ifyou're capable, right Like if
you're physically capable it'svery easy, like anybody can have
a kid.

Speaker 1 (39:33):
And the fact that a lot of people don't actually
believe in condoms.
Now, that is just.
I wouldn't say that, but I feellike more and more people are.

Speaker 2 (39:43):
Anti-sexual protection.

Speaker 1 (39:45):
Sure or contraceptives.

Speaker 2 (39:47):
Contraceptive yeah.

Speaker 1 (39:48):
Whatever.
But I wouldn't say that.
Maybe I'm generalizing, but Ithink because everybody gets to
the sense of like, ooh, thisperson is for me, and even not
they could just get caught up inthe lust of it, all that it
causes for a lot of premature Iwouldn't say babies, but a lot
of premature.
It progresses the relationshipa lot faster.

(40:12):
It needs to be, and because ofthat reason you end up having
people that are parents but theyshouldn't be parents together
because they were never meant tobe together.
So it starts off feeling like alot of resentment because it's
two people who were into eachother but not necessarily loved
each other.
But then they have a child thatthey both love.

(40:32):
But the conflicting issue istheir relationship with one
another.
That's why it's so hard to havemixed families.

Speaker 2 (40:38):
Yeah, but that's why I mean and I always think about,
like love Not always, but Ifeel like recently I've always
thought about love and childrenand babies.
With the great story that isSteven Universe, sapphire and

(40:58):
Ruby, I think love is supposedto be the, or children, babies
are supposed to be thepersonification of your love for
somebody else, and I feel likeat times that is not lost.
I just think that a lot ofpeople idea of what love is,

(41:20):
what the physical effects oflove are, aren't the same.
Yeah, so I feel like for me, ifyou've ever watched Steven
Universe, these two gems form adifferent gem, a fusion, a
fusion spoiler alert and it istheir love, their love, formed

(41:41):
this being that is greater thanthem by themselves, and that's
what I think babies should be.

Speaker 1 (41:49):
Their love gave birth to something greater.

Speaker 2 (41:51):
Exactly, and I feel like that's what babies are, and
because you're giving birth tosomething greater and something
so cherished, something that isso forbidden and something so
cherished between you two, youdo anything to keep it safe and
protected and strong and allthese things, and I just feel
like that's what it should be.
So, if it's not that you shouldhave kids, but you get into.

(42:12):
That's just me, though,personally.

Speaker 1 (42:15):
No, you get into a deeper topic that a lot of
people don't want to talk aboutand I was just speaking about
this, but I think a lot ofpeople, I don't even want to say
a lot of people, but I'm goingto make a statement and feel
free to come back at me if youall don't believe me, but what I

(42:36):
realize is that when you end upgrowing in these homes that you
felt like your love wasneglected.
You I'm not going to say youdon't know how to properly love,
but you don't know how to beproperly loved, and that's
another side tangent.
But it's very hard to believein something that you don't

(42:57):
understand.

Speaker 2 (42:58):
For sure.

Speaker 1 (42:59):
Because you only view it as physical.
And I think that's the problemBecause, similar to your point
when you talk about Garnet andAmethyst, that is a connection
of emotion.

Speaker 2 (43:11):
Who is why Amethyst Do?

Speaker 1 (43:13):
you mean like Ruby and Sapphire?
Yes, Ruby and Sapphire.

Speaker 2 (43:16):
I'm sorry if y'all don't watch Steven Universe.
You need to.
I don't even know why this issomething we have to tell you to
do.
Go watch Steven's Universe.
This is one of the greatestanimated shows in the fucking
world, like Top 5.

Speaker 1 (43:30):
That show has so many undertones of emotional
intelligence.

Speaker 2 (43:36):
Nuance and it's a children's show.
15 minute episodes on CartoonNetwork.

Speaker 1 (43:42):
Season 2 went to the rest After season 1, everything
all the episodes 30 minutes.

Speaker 2 (43:46):
Yeah, ok.

Speaker 1 (43:47):
But even the movies and everything.
But what I was trying to get tois simply this I was having a
conversation where I was like Ithink people are replacing the
idea of love with pets.
And I said, the reason why Iwill never get a pet before I
actually get married and havechildren is because I have too
much love to be giving out andnot receiving.

(44:09):
No, not that, because I willreceive it back.
I know that I have too muchlove that I would like to give
to people who, at the end of theday, aren't relying on me.
So, like with a pet you'regiving them their food, you're
giving them shelter, you'regiving them water, toys, all
these things, and people willtalk well, a dog gives me this

(44:30):
back and I'm like sure, butrealistically, that dog is just
doing that because you'reproviding to them.
Now they have all these studiesthat dogs are blah, blah, blah.
Whatever, what I'm trying tosay is that there's so much more
power when you give your loveto say somebody who's your
person, and you understand thatthis person can.
They can choose to be with youor they can choose to leave you,

(44:53):
but because they have so muchlove for you and all that you
have provided, they want to givethat back to you.
That reciprocation right.
Why would I not want to hold onand cherish that the dog no
more fucking, always going tolove me, that cat always going
to fucking love me?
You know what I'm?

Speaker 2 (45:08):
saying Cats don't really love people.

Speaker 1 (45:11):
The worst.
But the fact of the matter is,if the opportunity for you to
fall out of love with me isthere, that means I have to
constantly, constantly prove toyou that we should not prove
that I am in love with you,because what is that going to do
?
That practice should thenoverflow into your children,
because I'm taking this time tolove you so deeply over these

(45:34):
years.
And then we, like you said, wecreated a garnet.
We created a garnet, and thatgarnet is the reflection of the
love that me and you have witheach other.
So it's the same thing.
I'm just telling you how I feel.
People are trying to misplacetheir love because they feel
like they're in these lovelessmarriages, but half the time you
just don't want to admit toyourself that you was trying to

(45:55):
force something that shouldn'tbe forced.
And we can all say shit.
I'ma say it, i'ma be the firstone to say it Love is a powerful
aphrodisiac.
Honestly, it's the greatestdrug you'll ever have in your
life.
People have killed over love,people have stolen over love,
people have literallybackstabbed people over love,

(46:18):
and we always, always talk abouthow, oh, I'm hurt, I don't want
this, I don't want that.
But you never say that youdon't want love.
You never say that you don'twant to love.
And anybody who tells you thatthey could be single for the
rest of the life they lying toyou.

Speaker 2 (46:32):
Some people can't be them.

Speaker 1 (46:34):
They lying to you.
They can be alone and not in arelationship, but they're gonna
still need some form of intimacy, intimacy Emotional.
Yeah, which means you stillneed love.
So when people be saying thatstuff, I'm gonna say stop
thinking about the Western ideaof love.
Love is multifaceted.

Speaker 2 (46:50):
It is a verb.

Speaker 1 (46:52):
It is a verb.
And why are we talking aboutthis?
Cause us two motherfuckers wasout here getting our ass beat.
We did not know what the fucklove was.
Yeah, it's what it really is.
So sometimes you have to take astep back, right.

Speaker 2 (47:06):
They would call what we got tough love.
Some people would say, well, wegot a lot of tough love.
I feel like the.
When you like, reflect back onyour childhood.
I feel like, for me, thememories that I remember the
most are the ones that involveless desirable situations.

(47:27):
It's called trauma.
It's called trauma.
Yeah, but I'm like it wasn't allbad, of course, but I feel like
anything that was good was good, because it should be good,
right, like yeah, like I neverreally had to too much worry
about where my next meal wascoming from.
I knew I was always gonna havefood.

Speaker 1 (47:44):
You don't have memories Like I have good
memories.
I have really good memories ofmom and dad.

Speaker 2 (47:49):
Yeah, they're cool people.

Speaker 1 (47:50):
Yeah, I mean I have, but my problem is that I always,
I always look at the world likeit's half full.

Speaker 2 (47:57):
Half full.

Speaker 1 (47:58):
I'm a very optimistic person, so like for me.

Speaker 2 (48:01):
And I'm a matter of fact, person Like no the glass
does, it's air in the glass.
Yeah, but it's also water inthe glass too, yeah.

Speaker 1 (48:07):
I can see, but that's why we go well together,
because we balance each otherout.

Speaker 2 (48:11):
Yeah, I mean, I'm a water sign and you're a fire
sign, so we make sense, sure.

Speaker 1 (48:16):
Cause I didn't.
I thought Sagittarius was earthfor a long time, until
something.

Speaker 2 (48:20):
Doesn't it seem like it?
It would be an earth sign.

Speaker 1 (48:23):
It's a horse.
Yeah, it's a man horse why?

Speaker 2 (48:27):
would that Like.
It's like the line to which anwardrobe Where's the half man,
half goat?

Speaker 1 (48:32):
Santar, santar, yeah, sagittarius.

Speaker 2 (48:35):
But yeah, I mean, I yeah, we make sense.
Fire and water.
People think that we're likeopposites, but we actually we
balance each other.

Speaker 1 (48:45):
Very well.

Speaker 2 (48:46):
Yeah, so I like Sagittarius people.

Speaker 1 (48:49):
We're an amazing breed.
That's what I hear.

Speaker 2 (48:53):
Y'all don't bother me .
Some people, some other peoplehave probably have a different
opinion of you, but I, for themost part, like Sagittarius,
yeah what you trying to say.
I'm saying like everybody has asign that they don't like.
Well, I hear that, or that theydon't get along with I hear.

Speaker 1 (49:06):
Well, every time I introduce myself and tell people
what, like, what I am cause youknow, that's a question that
everybody asks off the face yeah, I'd be like.
They'd be like, oh you, aSagittarist.
I said.

Speaker 2 (49:16):
Oh, a terrorist.
Yes, I was like what?
Yeah, I mean I feel like theonly bad thing people say about
cancers is that we're emotional,like we're cry babies.
But I mean, yeah, Like what thehell?
Like I was going to say I don'treally cry a lot, but I really
don't, but like I'm alwaysemotional, which makes no sense.

(49:39):
Yeah, I'm always emotional,though.

Speaker 1 (49:41):
Cause I feel like I'd be crying sometimes too much.

Speaker 2 (49:44):
I mean, that's the part of like we're growing, Like
we have a lot of emotionalintelligence, because we grew up
not being able to express ouremotions but feeling them.
So, like you know this thing,that you're feeling it's wrong.
Yeah, Like we.
And now I feel like I just wantto live in my emotions and just

(50:06):
live in be.

Speaker 1 (50:09):
I don't want to live in my emotions.
I want to live in a state ofpeace.

Speaker 2 (50:13):
No, I want to be able to like live in my emotions,
like be able to express when I'mthis way or when I'm that way,
oh yeah, yeah, I just like stoicin and like I do that all the
time.

Speaker 1 (50:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (50:22):
Like I'm gonna tell.
Like if you ask me how I feelabout something, I'm gonna tell
you exactly how I feel about it.
And like, if you would have, ifyou would have asked me 12
years ago when I was getting myass beat by my parents, if I was
how I was doing, I would tellyou I'm fine, I'm okay, I'm cool
.
But now if like a similarsituation of course not like
exact, because nobody's beatingmy ass now, but like if you were
asked me how a similar or ifyou were to ask me how a

(50:46):
situation is making me feel, Iwill tell you wholeheartedly
like it's making me feel thisway, and I'm not like holding
back emotion or lying.

Speaker 1 (50:54):
But that's growth.
Yeah, maybe if and I'm comingto the resolution of this
episode but maybe if our parentshad taken that same journey,
they would realize that youdon't need to beat your kids.

Speaker 2 (51:08):
For sure, but it did give us a lot of stories and a
lot of like to look back at forsure, but like the way this
episode was going I'm sorry Likeit was giving like like we just
.

Speaker 1 (51:19):
We was going to vent.
I didn't.
We was trying to make thisepisode kind of funny.

Speaker 2 (51:22):
We were yes, that was the theme.

Speaker 1 (51:24):
You know, I came in with the story and you saw it at
first.

Speaker 2 (51:27):
It took like 20 minutes for it, but we got there
, you really we, we, we landedsomewhere, and the point of it
all is we don't believe incorporal punishment.
Gentle parenting Maybe that'swhat this episode would be
called.

Speaker 1 (51:39):
Gentle parenting.
Gentle parenting yeah, I likethat.
All right, let's move to thenext segment.
Excuse me, I'm a little underthe weather.

Speaker 2 (51:48):
For sure.

Speaker 1 (51:51):
It's either things.

Speaker 2 (51:52):
I said no, oh my goodness, excuse me, what would
you like?
To which one would you like todo first?

Speaker 1 (51:57):
I don't care, you know, I'm for forever.

Speaker 2 (52:02):
Okay, so let's do the things I said.
Actually it's a two for one,because it's something that I
sent you on Twitter, but it is aghetto intellectual question.
So we're going to knock thesethis out, especially since we
talked a lot and then we get it.
We're going to knock it out atonce.
I sent you a video at 731 AMtoday because I was up at 731 in

(52:26):
the morning because Dajie and Iwere supposed to go boxing at
430, I mean at 530 in themorning, and he said I'm going
back to sleep.
And then woke up at nineo'clock and went boxing and
guess what I was doing?
Sleeping.

Speaker 1 (52:39):
I let you sleep.
You look like you was tired.

Speaker 2 (52:42):
I'm exhausted, but the ghetto intellectual question
is this this lady, it's a video, hold on.

Speaker 1 (52:53):
We'll start posting these on the page.

Speaker 2 (52:55):
Yeah, so you guys can look at them too and give us
your opinions.
As a lady sitting on anairplane and she asks a man who
has a window seat, will you giveup your seat for my daughter
because the scene the planeactually land calms her you, are
you giving up your seat to thelady daughter so she can be calm

(53:15):
for the flight?
She's old enough to have herown seat, so it's not like it's
like a top.

Speaker 1 (53:20):
Like it's not like you talking to me, I'd probably
say yeah, because I don't.
I'm just nice.
I actually generally don't carewhy I sit on the plane.

Speaker 2 (53:27):
Yeah, you're going to go to sleep anyway.

Speaker 1 (53:29):
Always I used to be a reader, but now the plane is,
damn it, the only time Iactually get sleep and I'm
uninterrupted and nobody canreach me, which I actually like
going on planes for that reason.

Speaker 2 (53:39):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (53:40):
I like.
I like going ghost for thatreason and I like going on
planes, because when I go ghostnobody will reach me except you
in today.
That's it.
Those are literally the onlypeople that have that are not on
do not disturb in my phone, buteverybody else is wonderful,
because somehow, some way youstill don't respond to my

(54:03):
messages quick enough.
That's cause I don't.
I'm terrible at texting andit's gotten worse because I put
all my energy into work.
But besides the point, you needto stop doing that.
If you ask me me personally,yeah, I probably give up the
seat.
Yeah, especially if it's ablack girl.

Speaker 2 (54:20):
It's not a black girl , it was a white lady, and our
white daughter.

Speaker 1 (54:23):
Yeah, I would still probably do it, just because
yeah.

Speaker 2 (54:26):
I mean you're a Christian.

Speaker 1 (54:29):
Sure, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (54:30):
Ask me the question.
Would you ask me the questionlike I asked you?

Speaker 1 (54:35):
So yummy, yes, there's a white lady to ask you
because you got a window seat.
Yes, she got a little girl withher Right.
She asked you hey, miss, yes,can my dog me?
Yes, yeah, excuse me, miss.

Speaker 2 (54:51):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (54:52):
Can my daughter get the window seat because it
actually calms her nerves whenshe can see the plane line.

Speaker 2 (54:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (54:58):
So it would be really , really considerate.

Speaker 2 (55:00):
Right.

Speaker 1 (55:01):
If you could do that.

Speaker 2 (55:02):
You know, random white lady that I don't know and
random white baby that I don'tknow.
I don't give a fuck.
If it called me, I could give afuck.
So you, if you and your whitebaby wanted a window seat
because it calms her, and youknew that before you got on this
flight, you should have boughtthe window seat, like I did,

(55:22):
because one thing about me I payfor my seat.

Speaker 1 (55:24):
I would.
I would probably be like sure,but do you mind yeah?

Speaker 2 (55:27):
And you're not going to have to send me whatever 29,
39, 49, $59, it is for this seat.
You're going to have to send mesomething.
I say you know what?

Speaker 1 (55:34):
you should have did.
That would have been more funny.
You should have been like Iwould have put my sunglasses on.

Speaker 2 (55:39):
Put them on her, put them on her headphones on.
But me personally, I'm notjoking with you and I think
y'all think I'm joking, but Iwould seriously be like you know
, you know what I hear, whatyou're saying.
But I actually did pay for thisseat because I too enjoy
watching the plane land or justlooking out the window from time

(56:04):
to time and also being able tocontrol the shade.
So if you would like, that'sactually the real.
Yeah, I just want to have thatshit open the whole flight.

Speaker 1 (56:12):
The sun is out and, oh my God, I want to hit them
people in the face.
I'm not going to lie to you,I'd be like son you know it's so
funny, I'm gonna post thisvideo.

Speaker 2 (56:21):
We was going either coming or going from Puerto Rico
and this man was looking outthe window.
But it was light outside and hewas just looking out the window
.
He had his phone recording outthe window and everything I put
the window shape how high it wasrecorded.
because I said I'm not about tokeep this up.
You got your video or whatever.
And I put the window straightdown, like it was literally me

(56:42):
with the window, the guy andthen Deji in the end, and I said
he was tweaking though, becausehe had his phone the whole time
.
I said you want the people toknow you coming, they gonna know
you coming where you get there.
And I put the thing down so Iwould tell that white lady I
mean I could, but I actually Iwould have no problem with
switching, and then only if shewould pay me for the seat.

(57:04):
That's the only way, especiallyif I paid for it.
If I just randomly got thisseat, then I'm definitely not
moving because I believe in theluck of the draw.

Speaker 1 (57:12):
Did I tell you I randomly got an economy plus
seat the other day with theextra leg room?

Speaker 2 (57:17):
Yes, I remember.
It was when you was coming homefrom your trip, right?

Speaker 1 (57:23):
That should almost make me want, always wanted me
to but I was like this is what Iwill all my head.
I was like I would pay for this.
Yeah, the amount of leg room,yeah.

Speaker 2 (57:33):
I feel like, because I know, because I know for a
fact I'm going to be taking atrip this year for my birthday,
I kind of just want to likesplurge on like first class or
you know, like making sure thatI have the most comfortable trip
this time around.
But yeah, like I wouldn't givea fine fuck in February.
Bitch, if you want to jump baby, to have this window seat, you
should have paid for it likeeverybody else or like me,

(57:55):
because one thing about it Ifeel like it's entitlement and
I'm not here to give nobody.

Speaker 1 (58:00):
It's not entitlement.

Speaker 2 (58:00):
People ask it's okay to ask yeah.
Or you know, like when people,when you get to the seat and
somebody already sitting inthere like, oh, yeah, like,
would you would you mind?
Yes, I would move Rosa Parks,get your ass up, the fuck, you
know, I would you would you mind?
Just I, just, I just would youmind?
Just, no, I would get your assup.

(58:22):
I'm bad, though, because you,just you would allow it Me.

Speaker 1 (58:26):
I'm not allowed.
No, I cause I'll.
I'll be like, oh damn Cause.
I remember this one time I wason a plane with this granny and
she was like.
This is the first time I'mflying to New York to see my
family and she's like I'm kindof a little bit nervous.
I stayed up with that lady thewhole time.

Speaker 2 (58:39):
Oh, you wanted to go to sleep Like a month.

Speaker 1 (58:42):
I was like wow.
But she's like oh, thank you,you made me feel so much better.
I was like yeah, but I'm tired.

Speaker 2 (58:47):
It didn't do nothing for you.
It didn't do nothing for you.

Speaker 1 (58:50):
It didn't make me feel no better than nothing.

Speaker 2 (58:51):
I was just like I made you feel better, but I feel
worse, yeah, and that was aterrible weekend for us.

Speaker 1 (58:57):
So it was just I was exhausted.

Speaker 2 (58:59):
Yeah, it just set the .
It set the course for theweekend.
I was also going to say Iremember I was on one flight and
somebody, baby, was doing allthis I don't mind the crying
cause they're babies but wasdoing this kicking on my seat or
something like that, and I hadto keep saying something over my
breath, like, but I feel likenext time I went, you know, as

(59:19):
black people, we really need totake our power back.
And I feel like this is evenjust like a testament to the
stories we was telling before,like, speak the fuck up.
Like you was petty, whichyou'll, you know which your
approach, and I was just youknow, like whatever.
But speak the fuck up foryourself.
Don't let these people make youfeel like, oh yeah, I can just
give up my seat.
Or yeah, I can just stay upthis whole flight and make you

(59:40):
feel comfortable, even though itputs me at ease.
Or oh yeah, I can just like,joe, baby, kick me in the back
of the seat for this two hourflight.
Speak the fuck up.
So I don't really wish.
I pre on everything I love.
I don't really plan on takingtoo many trips this year, but
like, if I do take a trip on aflight and the flight don't
break down cause all theseplanes keep breaking down and
bussing open or whatever thefuck.
I really hope somebody wouldask me you know, ma'am, ma'am,

(01:00:06):
if I get here with the ma'am,I'm gonna be like, listen here,
karen, and I'm gonna hit himwith the.
You you could, you could surely, surely pay for this seat $100
to my sale, thank you.
So thank you so much forlistening to today's episode of
the podcast.

(01:00:27):
Nothing but a G thing.
If you are following us on oursocial media, thank you.
If you aren't, why?
Why not?
We are on Instagram and Twitternothing, n O, t, h I N G.
Capital B, capital A, capital G, capital T.
We are on TikTok at nothing.
Spelled all the way out CapitalB, capital A, capital G, thank.

(01:00:50):
So nothing.
And then B A G thing, t I N G.
I am also on social mediaInstagram and Twitter at Suki
G's S U K I G, double E Z,because I make everything that I
do look twice as easy, and I'malso on TikTok at DJ Suki G's.
So that's DJ S U K I G, doubleE Z.

Speaker 1 (01:01:15):
As for myself, you can follow me on Twitter or X
and IG under the same username,which is the RN.
The letter N B underscore I'msorry the R and B thug

(01:01:35):
underscore daegee.
Side note, we are working onsome new segments, so you should
be on the lookout for that.
Apparently, we got some goodresponse for good good, so we
might have figure out a way toincorporate.

Speaker 2 (01:01:50):
Oh yes, look lyric interpretations.
Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 1 (01:01:54):
So we'll probably be adding that to the show.
Yeah, we might be doing someother things as well.

Speaker 2 (01:01:59):
Oh, we got.
We always got something coming.
We like we're always working onsomething.
I was going to say somethingbut I forgot the YouTube page.
YouTube as well.
Oh yeah, youtube as well.
We are going to be dropping.
We started a new series onnothing but a G thing.
It's called tones.
It's where we have mepersonally, I have some of my

(01:02:19):
friends that are DJs and we arelike just turning up in a crib.
So I have my friends that areDJing, doing like quick 30
minute sets.
We have our friends.
It's music, it's color, andwe're setting the tone for 2024
and we're just, we're just aboutlike community building.
So yeah, but that wasn't what Iwanted to say, and that's

(01:02:39):
that's going to be on ourYouTube channel.
Nothing but a G thing.
Put us in the YouTube church,and you should.
You shall see us.

Speaker 1 (01:02:45):
I thought, yeah, where it's nothing BAGT, yes.

Speaker 2 (01:02:50):
Okay, cool, cool.

Speaker 1 (01:02:51):
That's all we got.
Don't beat your kids, and ifyou do,