August 24, 2021 • 31 mins
Someone's been eating Sol's Nuts.
The Outlander is long range, enforcer-class starship crewed by Human Bounty, Slip. An abrasive man from the desert planet of Exodus. Sol, a green simian-like alien with 4 arms, and Trae, a rift rat human that weaseled his way aboard. Learn just how two seasoned bounty hunters got stuck with a neurotic scrapper from the worst place in the 7 Systems.
Refer to the Footnotes for more Information on how Season One ties in with Season 0.
Cast
Slip / JER-3 / Unnamed Overseer / Han Pandler - Skyler Giordano
Sol - Joseph Surabian
Trae / Thorg / Spanks Starblinder / Quixxo's Announcer / Patches O'Connell - James Hart
Production Notes
All music was written or arranged* by Skyler Giordano
Ambience and SFX were either created by Skyler Giordano or taken from attribution free sources
*El Jarabe Tapatio originally written by Jesús González Rubio
*Sonata "Pathetique" Op. 13 - II. Adagio cantabile originally written by Ludwig van Beethoven
Special Thanks:
We would like to thank our friends Graham Capobiano, and Riley Stekervetz for listening to this episode and helping us get it to the highest quality possible. We'd also like to extend our most gracious appreciation to George Fleagle for helping us refine some of the humor in post production.
Footnotes and FAQs:
- The Bar in which Trae is taken to is "Faison's Astropub", the same place as the beginning of Season 0
- This episode takes place near the end and shortly after of the final episodes of Season 0.
- Slip's name is not coincidental with the same Slip the Crew of the Wayfarer is looking for. They are the Same Person.
- The Circumstances of Overseer Vock's "retirement" is detailed in the final minutes of Episode 8 of Season 0. (CONTAINS SPOILERS)
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If you have any questions, Suggestions or Business Inquiries feel free to email us at OmegaStar7podcast@gmail.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:18):
Omega Star 7...
Now that's a bad place with even badder people.
The Name's Slip
Just Slip
I'm a bounty hunter.
Together with my best friend, Sol and some scrapper named Trae
We solve the issues of the despondent people of the Outlands, With guns.
(00:40):
Really,
really big guns,
shoot blasters first.
Ask questions later.
That's the way of these wild
wild stars
So let me be the first to say welcome to Omega Star 7
(01:04):
Good morning,
(01:30):
Good afternoon and good evening Omega Star 7
It's happy Thursday, Rensda, Guzday and Saturday
You're listening to the Sometime, Somewhere Show with Spanks Starblinder
I'm your host,
Spanks Starblinder, here with the news.
Big big news from the rift, notorious space pirate vax.
Arden has been captured by a group of unnamed spacers that it really was that easy to walk right to the ship,
(01:53):
blow it up and race off with the most dangerous man in the seven systems.
It's almost like it was all a hoax.
But no spoilers yet.
Funny that when breast for further comment on this,
a representative,
the cartel said,
won't hit that microphone out of my pen pal before I drain the blood from every man in your body and touch your corpse into the sun.
Fun much people,
those cartel thugs are,
(02:13):
am I right and other news?
D.
Gorman quadrant released a statement on the missing Del tracks princess saying they definitely did not eater.
So they did at the comment that the L tracks had the shut up.
Chicken feet up from homer's.
I need some asparagus juice slip,
yup.
(02:33):
Yeah.
Why I got some spotty on for you dead Another day and I'll make a star seven another day.
I had to deal with this life slip.
Are you you talking to yourself?
I'm trying to set the mood for the podcast uh podcast.
(02:56):
Uh Just what I needed some spider juice early in the morning.
What's wrong with you guys?
You should know what this is slip.
It's about the nuts that are going missing nuts.
Yeah.
My nuts.
(03:18):
Are you eating them again?
You think I'm eating your nuts?
I do.
I have a severe nut allergy.
I don't believe you.
Uh huh.
I've been your friend for 10 years.
You're going to trust the word of this kid we've known for like a week.
It's him.
(03:38):
Uh guys,
I don't even know where he keeps his nuts.
So like how could I eat them if I don't know where they are.
Don't lie to me.
I'm not.
I'm just saying like,
again,
I don't want to cause any trouble.
I just I don't know where his nut sauce all.
We've been friends For 10 years.
I know how much this thing that mean to you.
He does have a point kid.
(03:59):
Okay.
But like again,
I don't know where you keep your nuts.
So like how would I eat them if I can't even find them.
Like I can't put them in my mouth.
If I don't know where to find the nuts.
He got those nuts from his planet.
His mother gave him those nuts and you've been sneaking into his room getting under the covers,
reaching down that sack.
(04:20):
He keeps them in,
in putting them munching nuts right in your mouth.
Haven't yet?
Uh No.
Is that what he sleeps with his nuts in that mix?
He has special fruits.
They come only from his planet.
Do you know how hard it is for me to get those?
I can't just go back and get to myself.
(04:43):
I mean,
yeah,
I'm sure that it's very difficult for you to mix your fruit nuts together.
But like I cannot explain to you enough that like I didn't even know you had fruits and nuts.
So how could I be digesting them and like savoring them if I didn't know you had nuts to begin with.
Uh listen kid,
(05:05):
you're gonna think that soul is going to take the word of some guys skipping bar tabs back in the rift.
Some rift rat over his best friend.
I trust me.
I get it doesn't look good,
but like I'm not look how he sounds.
He's lying to us.
I'm not the one nominees nuts.
Like I can't explain enough.
I'm not next.
You're gonna blame thought thought,
(05:26):
did you eat the nuts?
Nothing.
No,
no,
no.
Exactly.
Kid fog does we don't even know what he eats again.
I don't know anything about thug like he's again,
I don't think he's I He's a weird one.
(05:46):
Like,
how do you know?
I'm kind of over this slip.
I'm a I'm a head to the engine room rick,
mind me kid,
what happened when we pick you up?
I mean,
so first of all,
I was hanging out down the street,
the same old place I used to hang out last week and then uh you guys busted in,
(06:08):
picked me up,
threw me into your ship and took me across the goddamn galaxy to turn me in for a bounty.
Uh if that sounds about right to you,
let me tell you how I remember it.
Ah the rift,
I always hated the rift.
A desolate place filled with the scamming villainy that was rejected from that desert planet.
(06:33):
Everyone's always talking about being born here is probably the second worst thing that could happen to someone in a mega star seven.
The first being spaghetti fied by a black hole and served with a pair of meatball moons from the bangle solar system.
That's a favorite dish by the gigantic gola people of cadarache.
If you can believe it,
you may think I'm joking,
(06:54):
but remember a huis motto,
we serve all patrons any size and like all things washed up by the sea of stars.
That is a megastar seven.
We ended up at a no holly's house.
A good eats swear slip.
Are you talking to yourself again,
but I doubt it's my podcast.
Get out of here.
You're still going on about that podcast.
(07:16):
It's gonna take off one of these days.
It's been 30 years.
So there we were walking here.
Mhm.
All right.
So here this bounty,
some kids skipping out of our taps here.
There's a whole lease.
That's that.
That's the job we got.
It pays.
(07:37):
How much does it pay and not much like probably Mhm.
5000 credits.
Good.
I guess it'll at least pay for the food.
Well,
howdy.
Hey there fellers compaqs O'connell.
I'm the head chef here at the police house of Good Eat and I just want to welcome you in here and hope that you guys have a swell time.
(08:06):
Is this really worth it?
I alright,
listen to you cowboy.
Yes sir.
Are you looking for someone frequent this by?
Yes sir.
I mean,
can we step over to the left to keep this conversation out of the way of our other guests?
(08:28):
No.
Okay.
Tell me what we want to know and we'll take care of it real quick.
You guys serve black.
Uh huh.
Very rarely.
But yes,
you try and drink on the job right now we're here.
It's 1000 credits.
It's not a big job,
(08:48):
but we really have to be that uptight about it.
Listen on anyone drinks the black.
Oh yeah,
I mean just give him a free because we're doing you a favor.
Well,
let's talk about that after we got the whole deal.
we can we can settle that up afterward.
All right Lindsay frequent here we'll take a seat over here second he comes in.
(09:08):
They come up.
Okay.
I mean that seems about equal and all well and good,
but I'm gonna need a hand signal.
Give us a hand signal when you see him.
Okay.
So what I'm running.
How about this?
I know this crisscross applesauce,
clap,
clap slap slap wrap wrap,
tiki tiki tiki taki.
How do you think about that?
What the hell was that?
(09:29):
You know the clap,
clap slap slap,
rip,
rip.
Ticky tacky.
How about ding tang Walla Walla bing bang.
I know the ting tang.
Well,
it's good enough.
Alright,
the tang Walla Walla,
bing bang.
It is.
Can I please have a black now?
Yeah,
of course.
I mean,
you can have you can have two if you want.
True for the first one because honestly this cake is I mean in my bad already,
(09:51):
but I can't tell what the black give me the whole keg.
Uh huh.
Well that you know what fine because nobody else drinks this.
Let's see what's on the tv calling all cool kids and larva out there.
Get ready to set your tasters to fund with quick So's arms,
drink the quickest way to quench your thirst build up a big old burst of energy and give your skin a healthy green glow now available for a limited time in five collector can or if you're a guardian,
(10:22):
you can just eat the can pictures aren't drink,
definitely not made for marches.
Ting tang Walla Walla,
bing bang.
All right.
It looks like it's that time.
All right.
All right.
So you go on.
We're gonna get him back to this table and maybe we'll walk out with him,
then bam,
understand.
(10:44):
And I am I am I am I the bam?
Sure.
All right.
You like to be the band?
Yeah,
I do.
All right.
I'll see you in a second,
bartender.
Yes,
sir.
Let me get a finery in death stare from a writing desk.
(11:06):
They're coming right on up.
Here you go.
Yeah,
let me get a uh flannery in flip flop if you don't mind flannery in flip flops,
kid.
That's pretty rough.
Yeah,
I mean,
it's been a long day.
I've been working hard,
you know,
shipping and shopping and working and doing all sorts of things.
(11:27):
So yeah,
flint area foot flop.
Those are kind of expensive.
Yeah,
I got it.
I got the creds for it.
What do you look at me?
You think?
I ain't good for it?
I'm throwing off of your free drink.
Oh,
you wanna I mean,
I'm not opposed to that.
I mean,
in that case I'll take a flummery in flip flop.
You have to care what he wants to.
Thank you.
I appreciate that.
(11:48):
I'm gonna cut right to the cheese kid.
We're looking for somebody uh who you looking for.
I know all kinds of people.
Well,
I mean,
not why I moved here,
but you know my associate back there,
We're gonna talk to him at the table.
The big,
big furry guy with like the forearms.
Yeah,
he's a bangle.
He's fine.
Okay.
(12:09):
They're nice.
From what I understand phenomenal people.
I mean,
if you offer me a drink,
it's a flip flop.
I mean,
I'm not gonna say no.
All right,
thanks for the drink.
You're welcome.
I mean,
come on back and get yourself some more than So.
This is my new friend.
What's your name?
(12:30):
Hey,
my name's Trey.
So a sol it's real,
it's real.
It's really great to meet you.
I mean,
your buddy here got me a flip flop.
So like I'm really appreciative bottom of flip flop.
Mhm.
Yes.
I mean,
he said he was good for,
it is not good for it,
like it's fine.
It's fine kid.
Okay.
(12:50):
I mean,
I just I don't want to cause no problems here.
It's fine.
Take a drink of this.
This uh what's this here?
It's black.
Like I can see that,
but like,
what's it called?
Black?
Uh that's okay.
I mean,
I'll I guess I'll try it.
Oh my God,
what is that?
That is holy why I'll say in about three seconds.
(13:13):
So three,
two one.
I'm I like black and there's a it's not that bad,
is it?
Let's do than anything else on tv.
All right.
Hi,
my name is han Chandler and I work for stars for hope and I'm here on the planet Bangle here with the group of bangle E.
(13:41):
This one's name is steve.
Say hi steve.
Hi one band jelly eat 6000 calories of fruit and nuts a day.
But times are hard after the war for the bangle.
E many of them displaced across the galaxy places without nuts.
However,
with your help we can make a change with the donation of 1 to 5 stars and a review.
(14:05):
You can help us feed bangle e all over a megastar seven so please don't wait review now.
I think we should wake the kid up.
So let me,
he's still out.
It was so quiet though I mean Yeah,
but should I wake him up nicely?
(14:28):
I don't care how you wake them up.
Get Hey kid.
Oh God yeah.
What?
Where the who the what?
Hello?
What?
Where the hell am I?
You got yourselves on the wrong side of the cartel?
The wrong side of the you guys part of the cartel have a bounty on us.
(14:50):
You know what I heard?
You've been skipping by,
I don't know what you're talking about.
What is your name?
Trey maybe who wants to know you know kid.
The bounty did say dead or alive and we took a little pity on a young guy like yourself.
Okay.
Um Yeah,
(15:10):
okay.
It was me I guess I got a bounty on but I don't know why I didn't even do it ain't that bad.
Yeah skipped out of bio tabs.
And who is house of good eats?
Everyone knows everyone knows but the meat is a frozen in the middle.
Like it's something I'm not doing anybody any harm to.
You don't even need to pay for those.
Do you have an idea of how how big your tab is?
(15:32):
I don't know like 20 credits,
30 credits.
You know how much of a flip flop is?
Yeah.
It's like I don't know,
accredited to That's 100 credit drink buddy.
Oh boy.
Oh wow.
Whoa.
Okay.
Well that's tab is over 40 200 credits.
(15:54):
Yeah.
Mhm.
Oh boy.
Uh So here's how it's gonna go.
We got about another day's travel to the zenith.
You're gonna sleep right where you're at Wait no no no no you can't you can't take me,
come on,
come on.
You're not going to Zenit.
You're gonna stop it,
seen it.
Then you're gonna go to the E.
(16:15):
M.
C.
No no no no no.
Like I I can't go there,
look at me,
I'm scrawny little I'll get eaten alive.
You can't take me there.
Come on.
She's the guys.
Listen,
you're acting kind of pathetic kid.
It's just a bar tab.
You'll spend like a month there.
You got a girlfriend.
I would get a girlfriend for you girls.
Don't have perhaps I don't want that.
(16:37):
There's no women there.
That's not what I was implying.
I don't want anything.
Oh God,
I'll be the girlfriend.
I don't want any of that.
I'm not ready for that.
I can't even handle commitment.
Please guys,
come on.
Let me let me come here real quick.
This kid's kind of pathetic.
Yeah.
(16:58):
What about it?
He's gonna get eaten alive,
slip.
What do we do about it?
Everyone's a kid cause so if we take him then we get bounties on our heads.
Use your two brains salute.
I took you in.
Let's take the kid in.
Let's see if let's see if he can help out.
All right,
(17:20):
kid.
Yeah.
Well,
yeah.
What you get when you talk about,
are you gonna let me go?
That depends.
Okay,
well,
I'm only is you're gonna get out of the engine okay?
You're going to spend some time with thought.
Okay,
you're gonna fix that cork phase defibrillator.
I got that.
I know how to do that.
(17:40):
I worked on many ships.
Many different people.
All legit.
Well,
okay,
they weren't necessarily legitimate,
but I've worked on them before.
Whatever.
Just don't look at thornburg.
Don't don't look at him.
What does he look like?
We don't know.
Just don't look at how can I look at it.
I don't know what he looks like.
(18:01):
Listen to him.
Okay.
Keep your eyes on the job and just listen to him.
No one goes down on that engine.
He's the only one down there.
That's that's his hope.
Okay,
I got you.
I got you all.
Go see thor thor is that thor gig thornburg?
Okay,
I'll go not see him.
(18:23):
So I'll have out some tunes.
Yeah,
the horror.
Yeah.
Mhm Mhm,
(18:45):
mm hmm.
Yeah,
Uh huh Mhm Right,
something like that.
Mhm Okay,
Yeah,
mm Mhm,
(19:08):
Mhm.
What's going on,
man?
I just love the stellar darlings.
(19:28):
It's a shame they broke up.
I still haven't gotten over that.
Hold on.
What?
What?
What?
What is that?
What is that?
That was not what you I don't know what that was in there,
but like,
I cannot work with that.
That is that is terrifying.
That is mind blowingly terrifying.
No,
no,
no,
no,
no,
no,
lock me back up,
put me in a put me in a room,
locked me away,
(19:49):
throwing I don't even care.
I am not working with that anymore.
Sounds good to me.
Okay,
wait,
hold on,
hold on.
Can we have a second option,
nope,
nope.
Wait,
but nope.
Come here.
You want to ride along with us.
You came and stand fog.
Have you seen him or not seen him or whatever?
Like it's listen,
(20:09):
dog has been a staple on this ship since that's what can we just knock them back out till we get please don't knock me up.
I got sounds good to me.
They say that zenith means the point in the sky directly above the observer.
The highest place you can reach.
Whoever wrote that about Senate must have had one son.
Donna Gallagher life.
(20:31):
All right.
I'm gonna go talk to evoke.
We're back.
Have fun kid.
The last time it was a free man.
Yeah,
I mean,
I don't care.
Okay,
come on kid jerry.
How is it going?
New user?
Oh,
come on again with the new user thing jerry.
Would you like to try our new drink?
(20:52):
Let's stick to the black kids.
Are you sure you don't want the flower?
Be inflatable flop.
That sounds like something you can drink,
kid.
Yeah,
I love the little flip flops like I'll try that.
Why not?
When the war ended 10 years ago and the rift of regions of Omega star seven were free from the seven system Federation.
(21:13):
The real problem started.
The cartel was always an issue,
but with no seat of power,
the oven would took hold.
No one's ever seen him.
They've only seen as overseers.
HVAC was one of them.
A shrewd amphibious creature,
sadistic and cunning,
all things considered.
I was glad we were on his side,
(21:33):
but I was about to find out.
We're going to have a new ally.
Hey,
look,
I picked up that kid.
You're looking for.
Wait a minute.
You're not folk.
Ah,
slip.
What a surprise.
A pleasant one to be sure.
Yeah,
yeah,
yeah.
Pleasure's all mine.
I'm here to turn in a bounty TuVOk.
(21:54):
Where is he?
Vac has been retired and I am his replacement.
I didn't think your cartel fellas could retire?
You're right,
we can't.
So just who are you then?
What the Seven systems has brought you here And what's happened Tuvok?
(22:14):
As I said,
Vac has been retired.
As for me,
I am your friend.
Even if you don't recognize me.
Oh God,
this is whoa,
wow,
that's for pea in rough,
wow.
Here is your black new user.
(22:34):
Would you care to start a tab?
Of course,
jerry logging it.
Now.
Listen,
I mean is there is there any way I can convince you to not tell me in please.
It's not up to me kid.
What about,
Hang on,
hang on,
hang on.
What about that gadget?
You took off of me.
Can I show you what it does?
Because I think you're gonna be very impressed.
(22:56):
Hold on,
friends like mine typically don't wear armor like that covering their face in all you seem like the kind of type that would stab someone in the back and me and my friends like to stab him in the front so we can look at them as they die.
Oh,
slip.
(23:16):
I'm hurt.
You don't recognize me,
but I assure you I am your friend,
be that as it may friends or not.
I do have a bounty for Voc.
And since you've graciously taken over his position,
you'll be covering it then?
No slip.
I do not lower myself to petty bounty.
(23:38):
So what do I do with this kid then.
That sounds like your problem,
not mine.
You sound like one of my friends just here in the seven systems,
are you anyway?
That will be revealed in time when I have a job for you.
(23:59):
Until then I have your number.
So if you don't mind,
I'll ask you take your leave now be seeing you slip.
There you go kid.
Okay,
so here you got to turn on this,
(24:19):
you can flip this,
pop this flick this,
turn this rotate this one and check this out.
The Z.
P.
D.
We got their whole set of channels on here.
We can listen in.
That's pretty good.
Right?
I mean,
you could use that.
Right?
I mean,
(24:39):
I mean,
yeah,
that's pretty cool kid.
We're bounty hunters though.
I mean,
I built this in in in four days,
five days,
you know,
4.5.
Really?
I mean,
what could think about what I could do with,
you know,
all the time.
You have me on your hands.
I mean,
you don't have to tell me that we can work together.
I could build more things for you.
(24:59):
Just think about it as an idea,
hey,
hey,
slip.
All right kid,
let's just say I had a change of hat non,
I'll talk to balk.
He's gonna let you go wait really?
Like,
I'm afraid to go.
Of course.
I thought,
you know,
he's so young then.
Maybe he just needs this extra chance.
So,
I have fun on zenith.
Wait,
wait,
(25:19):
hold up hold up.
I don't know nothing about zenith.
I'll really know nothing.
You can't just leave me here.
Hold on,
hold on.
Just stay here.
Stay there.
I'm not going anywhere.
I don't know nothing about nothing.
Slip.
What's going on?
Yeah,
he's a free man.
What do you mean?
He's a free man.
Fox,
dead.
Vox dead.
(25:39):
Let's just keep it under water.
All right,
let's get out of here then.
All right kid boy.
But like,
I still like oh you can't just leave me here.
I I don't know anything about this plan.
I'll really have nothing.
Come on.
Like.
And what do you suggest,
kid?
I mean,
we gave you the option to fix the ship.
(26:00):
You didn't do well.
Yeah,
but that's because I don't Have you seen have you seen it?
Them?
The thing.
It's with the tentacles and the and the for But like not for like kitten.
I don't even know what's going on there.
This is why we said don't look at thor we have never looked at it or Yeah,
(26:20):
I don't recommend it.
I mean,
I pull oh God okay,
but seriously?
Like,
you can't blame me for that.
But look at look at the C.
P.
D.
Read it.
I gave you like,
come on.
Is that worth something?
I can build all the things for you guys.
Come on.
Please give me a chance.
Please don't leave me in.
Please.
Please,
please.
I'm begging you.
(26:40):
I'm begging you.
I'm begging you.
All right kid.
As far as I see it,
we're out the 1000 credits.
You earned that back for us through your various times of work.
You know,
I could see you're coming with us for a little bit.
Yeah,
I mean,
I can I can do all sorts of things.
I mean whatever you need them if you want.
(27:01):
Okay,
again,
I will try to fix.
I don't remember what it was that I was trying to fix this.
Honestly,
I was terrified.
But whatever it was.
I mean if I don't have to see that kid,
just shut up.
Okay,
I'm gonna make a call real quick.
Hey?
Thought thanks.
Go ahead and set up a cot down there.
You've got yourself a new roommate.
(27:23):
Yeah.
You got yourself a brand new friend mark.
Make him feel really comfortable uh slip.
I don't think that's a good idea.
It's a great idea.
Alright kid.
Welcome a boy.
And that's how I remember it,
kid.
So if you look at me,
you stole those nuts and you're gonna fess up to it when soul gets back.
(27:46):
But it wasn't me guys.
Like I swear like I didn't those nuts on my nuts.
One soul.
Are you naked again?
It's been four days and stop using the cool it.
I got a towel this time.
It doesn't cover your 5th arm.
What?
(28:08):
What?
5th?
Oh yeah kid.
Huh?
That's that's not an arm.
That's given me a lot to think about.
Congratulations.
I guess the kid has something to say to you.
Uh Hey,
what's going?
Oh whoa,
(28:29):
what is What do you got?
Is that it?
You got 1/5 time?
I thought you guys only had four arms.
It's not an armed kid.
Well,
I mean,
I guess congratulations.
That,
geez.
What do you need to show me?
Not that I can tell you.
Can't just tell him.
Just tell him kid.
Tell what not to use the cool and I I can't you did with his nuts.
(28:53):
What I did with this.
Tell him the truth.
I didn't touch his second nuts.
Tell him the truth.
I am telling the truth.
I didn't touch his sack.
What do you think?
So?
I saved him out of the kindness of my heart.
And he's throwing me under the bus like this kid I'm gonna have to side with you can you can search me but I don't have your sack.
I promise you that I got my nuts right here kid.
(29:15):
Yeah,
I know you got your nuts right there.
That's what there's nuts.
Are feeling a little bit empty.
They are.
Yeah,
but like I'm not the one who grabbed them.
I didn't grab the sack.
That's what I'm saying.
Like I didn't mean snacking on the on the nuts all next time we make port.
I'll make sure you get some new nuts because I'm that kind of friend who tells you the truth.
Thank you,
(29:36):
slipped up.
Now.
You go ahead and take yourself a little nap.
All right.
I am kind of tired.
Great.
What are you what are you eating nuts?
What?
Mhm.
Yeah.
(29:57):
Mhm.
Mhm.
Mhm.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mhm.
(30:22):
Mhm.
Mhm.
Omega Star 7...
Now that's a bad place with even badder people.
The Name's Slip
Just Slip
I'm a bounty hunter.
Together with my best friend, Sol and some scrapper named Trae
We solve the issues of the despondent people of the Outlands, With guns.
(00:40):
Really,
really big guns,
shoot blasters first.
Ask questions later.
That's the way of these wild
wild stars
So let me be the first to say welcome to Omega Star 7
(01:04):
Good morning,
(01:30):
Good afternoon and good evening Omega Star 7
It's happy Thursday, Rensda, Guzday and Saturday
You're listening to the Sometime, Somewhere Show with Spanks Starblinder
I'm your host,
Spanks Starblinder, here with the news.
Big big news from the rift, notorious space pirate vax.
Arden has been captured by a group of unnamed spacers that it really was that easy to walk right to the ship,
(01:53):
blow it up and race off with the most dangerous man in the seven systems.
It's almost like it was all a hoax.
But no spoilers yet.
Funny that when breast for further comment on this,
a representative,
the cartel said,
won't hit that microphone out of my pen pal before I drain the blood from every man in your body and touch your corpse into the sun.
Fun much people,
those cartel thugs are,
(02:13):
am I right and other news?
D.
Gorman quadrant released a statement on the missing Del tracks princess saying they definitely did not eater.
So they did at the comment that the L tracks had the shut up.
Chicken feet up from homer's.
I need some asparagus juice slip,
yup.
(02:33):
Yeah.
Why I got some spotty on for you dead Another day and I'll make a star seven another day.
I had to deal with this life slip.
Are you you talking to yourself?
I'm trying to set the mood for the podcast uh podcast.
(02:56):
Uh Just what I needed some spider juice early in the morning.
What's wrong with you guys?
You should know what this is slip.
It's about the nuts that are going missing nuts.
Yeah.
My nuts.
(03:18):
Are you eating them again?
You think I'm eating your nuts?
I do.
I have a severe nut allergy.
I don't believe you.
Uh huh.
I've been your friend for 10 years.
You're going to trust the word of this kid we've known for like a week.
It's him.
(03:38):
Uh guys,
I don't even know where he keeps his nuts.
So like how could I eat them if I don't know where they are.
Don't lie to me.
I'm not.
I'm just saying like,
again,
I don't want to cause any trouble.
I just I don't know where his nut sauce all.
We've been friends For 10 years.
I know how much this thing that mean to you.
He does have a point kid.
(03:59):
Okay.
But like again,
I don't know where you keep your nuts.
So like how would I eat them if I can't even find them.
Like I can't put them in my mouth.
If I don't know where to find the nuts.
He got those nuts from his planet.
His mother gave him those nuts and you've been sneaking into his room getting under the covers,
reaching down that sack.
(04:20):
He keeps them in,
in putting them munching nuts right in your mouth.
Haven't yet?
Uh No.
Is that what he sleeps with his nuts in that mix?
He has special fruits.
They come only from his planet.
Do you know how hard it is for me to get those?
I can't just go back and get to myself.
(04:43):
I mean,
yeah,
I'm sure that it's very difficult for you to mix your fruit nuts together.
But like I cannot explain to you enough that like I didn't even know you had fruits and nuts.
So how could I be digesting them and like savoring them if I didn't know you had nuts to begin with.
Uh listen kid,
(05:05):
you're gonna think that soul is going to take the word of some guys skipping bar tabs back in the rift.
Some rift rat over his best friend.
I trust me.
I get it doesn't look good,
but like I'm not look how he sounds.
He's lying to us.
I'm not the one nominees nuts.
Like I can't explain enough.
I'm not next.
You're gonna blame thought thought,
(05:26):
did you eat the nuts?
Nothing.
No,
no,
no.
Exactly.
Kid fog does we don't even know what he eats again.
I don't know anything about thug like he's again,
I don't think he's I He's a weird one.
(05:46):
Like,
how do you know?
I'm kind of over this slip.
I'm a I'm a head to the engine room rick,
mind me kid,
what happened when we pick you up?
I mean,
so first of all,
I was hanging out down the street,
the same old place I used to hang out last week and then uh you guys busted in,
(06:08):
picked me up,
threw me into your ship and took me across the goddamn galaxy to turn me in for a bounty.
Uh if that sounds about right to you,
let me tell you how I remember it.
Ah the rift,
I always hated the rift.
A desolate place filled with the scamming villainy that was rejected from that desert planet.
(06:33):
Everyone's always talking about being born here is probably the second worst thing that could happen to someone in a mega star seven.
The first being spaghetti fied by a black hole and served with a pair of meatball moons from the bangle solar system.
That's a favorite dish by the gigantic gola people of cadarache.
If you can believe it,
you may think I'm joking,
(06:54):
but remember a huis motto,
we serve all patrons any size and like all things washed up by the sea of stars.
That is a megastar seven.
We ended up at a no holly's house.
A good eats swear slip.
Are you talking to yourself again,
but I doubt it's my podcast.
Get out of here.
You're still going on about that podcast.
(07:16):
It's gonna take off one of these days.
It's been 30 years.
So there we were walking here.
Mhm.
All right.
So here this bounty,
some kids skipping out of our taps here.
There's a whole lease.
That's that.
That's the job we got.
It pays.
(07:37):
How much does it pay and not much like probably Mhm.
5000 credits.
Good.
I guess it'll at least pay for the food.
Well,
howdy.
Hey there fellers compaqs O'connell.
I'm the head chef here at the police house of Good Eat and I just want to welcome you in here and hope that you guys have a swell time.
(08:06):
Is this really worth it?
I alright,
listen to you cowboy.
Yes sir.
Are you looking for someone frequent this by?
Yes sir.
I mean,
can we step over to the left to keep this conversation out of the way of our other guests?
(08:28):
No.
Okay.
Tell me what we want to know and we'll take care of it real quick.
You guys serve black.
Uh huh.
Very rarely.
But yes,
you try and drink on the job right now we're here.
It's 1000 credits.
It's not a big job,
(08:48):
but we really have to be that uptight about it.
Listen on anyone drinks the black.
Oh yeah,
I mean just give him a free because we're doing you a favor.
Well,
let's talk about that after we got the whole deal.
we can we can settle that up afterward.
All right Lindsay frequent here we'll take a seat over here second he comes in.
(09:08):
They come up.
Okay.
I mean that seems about equal and all well and good,
but I'm gonna need a hand signal.
Give us a hand signal when you see him.
Okay.
So what I'm running.
How about this?
I know this crisscross applesauce,
clap,
clap slap slap wrap wrap,
tiki tiki tiki taki.
How do you think about that?
What the hell was that?
(09:29):
You know the clap,
clap slap slap,
rip,
rip.
Ticky tacky.
How about ding tang Walla Walla bing bang.
I know the ting tang.
Well,
it's good enough.
Alright,
the tang Walla Walla,
bing bang.
It is.
Can I please have a black now?
Yeah,
of course.
I mean,
you can have you can have two if you want.
True for the first one because honestly this cake is I mean in my bad already,
(09:51):
but I can't tell what the black give me the whole keg.
Uh huh.
Well that you know what fine because nobody else drinks this.
Let's see what's on the tv calling all cool kids and larva out there.
Get ready to set your tasters to fund with quick So's arms,
drink the quickest way to quench your thirst build up a big old burst of energy and give your skin a healthy green glow now available for a limited time in five collector can or if you're a guardian,
(10:22):
you can just eat the can pictures aren't drink,
definitely not made for marches.
Ting tang Walla Walla,
bing bang.
All right.
It looks like it's that time.
All right.
All right.
So you go on.
We're gonna get him back to this table and maybe we'll walk out with him,
then bam,
understand.
(10:44):
And I am I am I am I the bam?
Sure.
All right.
You like to be the band?
Yeah,
I do.
All right.
I'll see you in a second,
bartender.
Yes,
sir.
Let me get a finery in death stare from a writing desk.
(11:06):
They're coming right on up.
Here you go.
Yeah,
let me get a uh flannery in flip flop if you don't mind flannery in flip flops,
kid.
That's pretty rough.
Yeah,
I mean,
it's been a long day.
I've been working hard,
you know,
shipping and shopping and working and doing all sorts of things.
(11:27):
So yeah,
flint area foot flop.
Those are kind of expensive.
Yeah,
I got it.
I got the creds for it.
What do you look at me?
You think?
I ain't good for it?
I'm throwing off of your free drink.
Oh,
you wanna I mean,
I'm not opposed to that.
I mean,
in that case I'll take a flummery in flip flop.
You have to care what he wants to.
Thank you.
I appreciate that.
(11:48):
I'm gonna cut right to the cheese kid.
We're looking for somebody uh who you looking for.
I know all kinds of people.
Well,
I mean,
not why I moved here,
but you know my associate back there,
We're gonna talk to him at the table.
The big,
big furry guy with like the forearms.
Yeah,
he's a bangle.
He's fine.
Okay.
(12:09):
They're nice.
From what I understand phenomenal people.
I mean,
if you offer me a drink,
it's a flip flop.
I mean,
I'm not gonna say no.
All right,
thanks for the drink.
You're welcome.
I mean,
come on back and get yourself some more than So.
This is my new friend.
What's your name?
(12:30):
Hey,
my name's Trey.
So a sol it's real,
it's real.
It's really great to meet you.
I mean,
your buddy here got me a flip flop.
So like I'm really appreciative bottom of flip flop.
Mhm.
Yes.
I mean,
he said he was good for,
it is not good for it,
like it's fine.
It's fine kid.
Okay.
(12:50):
I mean,
I just I don't want to cause no problems here.
It's fine.
Take a drink of this.
This uh what's this here?
It's black.
Like I can see that,
but like,
what's it called?
Black?
Uh that's okay.
I mean,
I'll I guess I'll try it.
Oh my God,
what is that?
That is holy why I'll say in about three seconds.
(13:13):
So three,
two one.
I'm I like black and there's a it's not that bad,
is it?
Let's do than anything else on tv.
All right.
Hi,
my name is han Chandler and I work for stars for hope and I'm here on the planet Bangle here with the group of bangle E.
(13:41):
This one's name is steve.
Say hi steve.
Hi one band jelly eat 6000 calories of fruit and nuts a day.
But times are hard after the war for the bangle.
E many of them displaced across the galaxy places without nuts.
However,
with your help we can make a change with the donation of 1 to 5 stars and a review.
(14:05):
You can help us feed bangle e all over a megastar seven so please don't wait review now.
I think we should wake the kid up.
So let me,
he's still out.
It was so quiet though I mean Yeah,
but should I wake him up nicely?
(14:28):
I don't care how you wake them up.
Get Hey kid.
Oh God yeah.
What?
Where the who the what?
Hello?
What?
Where the hell am I?
You got yourselves on the wrong side of the cartel?
The wrong side of the you guys part of the cartel have a bounty on us.
(14:50):
You know what I heard?
You've been skipping by,
I don't know what you're talking about.
What is your name?
Trey maybe who wants to know you know kid.
The bounty did say dead or alive and we took a little pity on a young guy like yourself.
Okay.
Um Yeah,
(15:10):
okay.
It was me I guess I got a bounty on but I don't know why I didn't even do it ain't that bad.
Yeah skipped out of bio tabs.
And who is house of good eats?
Everyone knows everyone knows but the meat is a frozen in the middle.
Like it's something I'm not doing anybody any harm to.
You don't even need to pay for those.
Do you have an idea of how how big your tab is?
(15:32):
I don't know like 20 credits,
30 credits.
You know how much of a flip flop is?
Yeah.
It's like I don't know,
accredited to That's 100 credit drink buddy.
Oh boy.
Oh wow.
Whoa.
Okay.
Well that's tab is over 40 200 credits.
(15:54):
Yeah.
Mhm.
Oh boy.
Uh So here's how it's gonna go.
We got about another day's travel to the zenith.
You're gonna sleep right where you're at Wait no no no no you can't you can't take me,
come on,
come on.
You're not going to Zenit.
You're gonna stop it,
seen it.
Then you're gonna go to the E.
(16:15):
M.
C.
No no no no no.
Like I I can't go there,
look at me,
I'm scrawny little I'll get eaten alive.
You can't take me there.
Come on.
She's the guys.
Listen,
you're acting kind of pathetic kid.
It's just a bar tab.
You'll spend like a month there.
You got a girlfriend.
I would get a girlfriend for you girls.
Don't have perhaps I don't want that.
(16:37):
There's no women there.
That's not what I was implying.
I don't want anything.
Oh God,
I'll be the girlfriend.
I don't want any of that.
I'm not ready for that.
I can't even handle commitment.
Please guys,
come on.
Let me let me come here real quick.
This kid's kind of pathetic.
Yeah.
(16:58):
What about it?
He's gonna get eaten alive,
slip.
What do we do about it?
Everyone's a kid cause so if we take him then we get bounties on our heads.
Use your two brains salute.
I took you in.
Let's take the kid in.
Let's see if let's see if he can help out.
All right,
(17:20):
kid.
Yeah.
Well,
yeah.
What you get when you talk about,
are you gonna let me go?
That depends.
Okay,
well,
I'm only is you're gonna get out of the engine okay?
You're going to spend some time with thought.
Okay,
you're gonna fix that cork phase defibrillator.
I got that.
I know how to do that.
(17:40):
I worked on many ships.
Many different people.
All legit.
Well,
okay,
they weren't necessarily legitimate,
but I've worked on them before.
Whatever.
Just don't look at thornburg.
Don't don't look at him.
What does he look like?
We don't know.
Just don't look at how can I look at it.
I don't know what he looks like.
(18:01):
Listen to him.
Okay.
Keep your eyes on the job and just listen to him.
No one goes down on that engine.
He's the only one down there.
That's that's his hope.
Okay,
I got you.
I got you all.
Go see thor thor is that thor gig thornburg?
Okay,
I'll go not see him.
(18:23):
So I'll have out some tunes.
Yeah,
the horror.
Yeah.
Mhm Mhm,
(18:45):
mm hmm.
Yeah,
Uh huh Mhm Right,
something like that.
Mhm Okay,
Yeah,
mm Mhm,
(19:08):
Mhm.
What's going on,
man?
I just love the stellar darlings.
(19:28):
It's a shame they broke up.
I still haven't gotten over that.
Hold on.
What?
What?
What?
What is that?
What is that?
That was not what you I don't know what that was in there,
but like,
I cannot work with that.
That is that is terrifying.
That is mind blowingly terrifying.
No,
no,
no,
no,
no,
no,
lock me back up,
put me in a put me in a room,
locked me away,
(19:49):
throwing I don't even care.
I am not working with that anymore.
Sounds good to me.
Okay,
wait,
hold on,
hold on.
Can we have a second option,
nope,
nope.
Wait,
but nope.
Come here.
You want to ride along with us.
You came and stand fog.
Have you seen him or not seen him or whatever?
Like it's listen,
(20:09):
dog has been a staple on this ship since that's what can we just knock them back out till we get please don't knock me up.
I got sounds good to me.
They say that zenith means the point in the sky directly above the observer.
The highest place you can reach.
Whoever wrote that about Senate must have had one son.
Donna Gallagher life.
(20:31):
All right.
I'm gonna go talk to evoke.
We're back.
Have fun kid.
The last time it was a free man.
Yeah,
I mean,
I don't care.
Okay,
come on kid jerry.
How is it going?
New user?
Oh,
come on again with the new user thing jerry.
Would you like to try our new drink?
(20:52):
Let's stick to the black kids.
Are you sure you don't want the flower?
Be inflatable flop.
That sounds like something you can drink,
kid.
Yeah,
I love the little flip flops like I'll try that.
Why not?
When the war ended 10 years ago and the rift of regions of Omega star seven were free from the seven system Federation.
(21:13):
The real problem started.
The cartel was always an issue,
but with no seat of power,
the oven would took hold.
No one's ever seen him.
They've only seen as overseers.
HVAC was one of them.
A shrewd amphibious creature,
sadistic and cunning,
all things considered.
I was glad we were on his side,
(21:33):
but I was about to find out.
We're going to have a new ally.
Hey,
look,
I picked up that kid.
You're looking for.
Wait a minute.
You're not folk.
Ah,
slip.
What a surprise.
A pleasant one to be sure.
Yeah,
yeah,
yeah.
Pleasure's all mine.
I'm here to turn in a bounty TuVOk.
(21:54):
Where is he?
Vac has been retired and I am his replacement.
I didn't think your cartel fellas could retire?
You're right,
we can't.
So just who are you then?
What the Seven systems has brought you here And what's happened Tuvok?
(22:14):
As I said,
Vac has been retired.
As for me,
I am your friend.
Even if you don't recognize me.
Oh God,
this is whoa,
wow,
that's for pea in rough,
wow.
Here is your black new user.
(22:34):
Would you care to start a tab?
Of course,
jerry logging it.
Now.
Listen,
I mean is there is there any way I can convince you to not tell me in please.
It's not up to me kid.
What about,
Hang on,
hang on,
hang on.
What about that gadget?
You took off of me.
Can I show you what it does?
Because I think you're gonna be very impressed.
(22:56):
Hold on,
friends like mine typically don't wear armor like that covering their face in all you seem like the kind of type that would stab someone in the back and me and my friends like to stab him in the front so we can look at them as they die.
Oh,
slip.
(23:16):
I'm hurt.
You don't recognize me,
but I assure you I am your friend,
be that as it may friends or not.
I do have a bounty for Voc.
And since you've graciously taken over his position,
you'll be covering it then?
No slip.
I do not lower myself to petty bounty.
(23:38):
So what do I do with this kid then.
That sounds like your problem,
not mine.
You sound like one of my friends just here in the seven systems,
are you anyway?
That will be revealed in time when I have a job for you.
(23:59):
Until then I have your number.
So if you don't mind,
I'll ask you take your leave now be seeing you slip.
There you go kid.
Okay,
so here you got to turn on this,
(24:19):
you can flip this,
pop this flick this,
turn this rotate this one and check this out.
The Z.
P.
D.
We got their whole set of channels on here.
We can listen in.
That's pretty good.
Right?
I mean,
you could use that.
Right?
I mean,
(24:39):
I mean,
yeah,
that's pretty cool kid.
We're bounty hunters though.
I mean,
I built this in in in four days,
five days,
you know,
4.5.
Really?
I mean,
what could think about what I could do with,
you know,
all the time.
You have me on your hands.
I mean,
you don't have to tell me that we can work together.
I could build more things for you.
(24:59):
Just think about it as an idea,
hey,
hey,
slip.
All right kid,
let's just say I had a change of hat non,
I'll talk to balk.
He's gonna let you go wait really?
Like,
I'm afraid to go.
Of course.
I thought,
you know,
he's so young then.
Maybe he just needs this extra chance.
So,
I have fun on zenith.
Wait,
wait,
(25:19):
hold up hold up.
I don't know nothing about zenith.
I'll really know nothing.
You can't just leave me here.
Hold on,
hold on.
Just stay here.
Stay there.
I'm not going anywhere.
I don't know nothing about nothing.
Slip.
What's going on?
Yeah,
he's a free man.
What do you mean?
He's a free man.
Fox,
dead.
Vox dead.
(25:39):
Let's just keep it under water.
All right,
let's get out of here then.
All right kid boy.
But like,
I still like oh you can't just leave me here.
I I don't know anything about this plan.
I'll really have nothing.
Come on.
Like.
And what do you suggest,
kid?
I mean,
we gave you the option to fix the ship.
(26:00):
You didn't do well.
Yeah,
but that's because I don't Have you seen have you seen it?
Them?
The thing.
It's with the tentacles and the and the for But like not for like kitten.
I don't even know what's going on there.
This is why we said don't look at thor we have never looked at it or Yeah,
(26:20):
I don't recommend it.
I mean,
I pull oh God okay,
but seriously?
Like,
you can't blame me for that.
But look at look at the C.
P.
D.
Read it.
I gave you like,
come on.
Is that worth something?
I can build all the things for you guys.
Come on.
Please give me a chance.
Please don't leave me in.
Please.
Please,
please.
I'm begging you.
(26:40):
I'm begging you.
I'm begging you.
All right kid.
As far as I see it,
we're out the 1000 credits.
You earned that back for us through your various times of work.
You know,
I could see you're coming with us for a little bit.
Yeah,
I mean,
I can I can do all sorts of things.
I mean whatever you need them if you want.
(27:01):
Okay,
again,
I will try to fix.
I don't remember what it was that I was trying to fix this.
Honestly,
I was terrified.
But whatever it was.
I mean if I don't have to see that kid,
just shut up.
Okay,
I'm gonna make a call real quick.
Hey?
Thought thanks.
Go ahead and set up a cot down there.
You've got yourself a new roommate.
(27:23):
Yeah.
You got yourself a brand new friend mark.
Make him feel really comfortable uh slip.
I don't think that's a good idea.
It's a great idea.
Alright kid.
Welcome a boy.
And that's how I remember it,
kid.
So if you look at me,
you stole those nuts and you're gonna fess up to it when soul gets back.
(27:46):
But it wasn't me guys.
Like I swear like I didn't those nuts on my nuts.
One soul.
Are you naked again?
It's been four days and stop using the cool it.
I got a towel this time.
It doesn't cover your 5th arm.
What?
(28:08):
What?
5th?
Oh yeah kid.
Huh?
That's that's not an arm.
That's given me a lot to think about.
Congratulations.
I guess the kid has something to say to you.
Uh Hey,
what's going?
Oh whoa,
(28:29):
what is What do you got?
Is that it?
You got 1/5 time?
I thought you guys only had four arms.
It's not an armed kid.
Well,
I mean,
I guess congratulations.
That,
geez.
What do you need to show me?
Not that I can tell you.
Can't just tell him.
Just tell him kid.
Tell what not to use the cool and I I can't you did with his nuts.
(28:53):
What I did with this.
Tell him the truth.
I didn't touch his second nuts.
Tell him the truth.
I am telling the truth.
I didn't touch his sack.
What do you think?
So?
I saved him out of the kindness of my heart.
And he's throwing me under the bus like this kid I'm gonna have to side with you can you can search me but I don't have your sack.
I promise you that I got my nuts right here kid.
(29:15):
Yeah,
I know you got your nuts right there.
That's what there's nuts.
Are feeling a little bit empty.
They are.
Yeah,
but like I'm not the one who grabbed them.
I didn't grab the sack.
That's what I'm saying.
Like I didn't mean snacking on the on the nuts all next time we make port.
I'll make sure you get some new nuts because I'm that kind of friend who tells you the truth.
Thank you,
(29:36):
slipped up.
Now.
You go ahead and take yourself a little nap.
All right.
I am kind of tired.
Great.
What are you what are you eating nuts?
What?
Mhm.
Yeah.
(29:57):
Mhm.
Mhm.
Mhm.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mhm.
(30:22):
Mhm.
Mhm.
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