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June 10, 2025 • 48 mins

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What does it mean to step up when tragedy strikes? In this deeply personal episode, Kelli welcomes her first guest co-host, Robert "Bigfoot Bob" Dominguez from the Bigfoot Club podcast, for a conversation about unexpected parenthood and the profound journey of raising someone else's child.

When Robert's beloved sister Sandra died from cervical cancer, her final wish was for her brother to raise her son Stephen. Already a significant male figure in the boy's life, Robert transitioned from fun uncle to full-time parent overnight, navigating his own grief while helping his nephew through the same devastating loss. "I couldn't yell at him because he lost his mom, which was his only parent, and I lost my favorite sibling," Robert shares, revealing the delicate balance of discipline and compassion required in their situation.

The conversation explores how Robert made Stephen his absolute priority, even ending romantic relationships when partners couldn't accept coming second to his nephew's needs. Kelli relates with her own experiences as a single mom following divorce, and together they discuss the practical challenges and emotional complexities of single parenthood. There's particular poignancy when Robert describes watching Stephen become a father himself, completing a beautiful cycle of care and commitment.

Beyond the specifics of their stories, this episode offers profound insights about chosen family, sacrifice, and unconditional love. It's a testament to the truth that parenting isn't defined by biology but by presence, commitment, and the courage to step up when needed most. Whether you're raising your own children solo, caring for someone else's child, or simply interested in stories of remarkable human connection, this conversation will touch your heart and perhaps change how you think about what makes a family.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome back to another episode of On Our Best
Behavior.
I'm your host, kelly, and ifyou're wondering where my
favorite sidekick McCoy is, well, he's officially ditched me for
the summer.
That's right.
He's off living his best lifewhile I'm here holding down the
fort.
But don't worry, I've gotsomething very special planned

(00:25):
break.
I'll be joined by some amazingguest co-hosts who are ready to
step in, share their stories andbring fresh energy to the show.
We'll still be talking aboutlife lessons, laughs and all the
good stuff, with just a few newvoices, until our dynamic duo
reunites next season.
So buckle up, it's going to bea fun ride, let's get into it.
Fun ride, let's get into it.
You're listening to anotherepisode of On Our Best Behavior,

(00:49):
and today is exciting becauseit's my first episode with my
temporary guest co-host, robertDominguez.

Speaker 2 (01:01):
Hey.

Speaker 1 (01:02):
Kelly, aka Bigfoot Bob.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
Hey, thank you for doing that moniker.
That's awesome, I love it.
And you all know Bigfoot Bobfrom the Bigfoot Club podcast,
so I talked about it on my lastepisode that he was going to be

(01:26):
joining me and here he is, sota-da, I'm happy to be here.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
I was going to say I call you Robert when I'm mad at
you and Bigfoot Bob when I'm not.
Yeah Right, everyone knows fiveBobs, but nobody knows a
Bigfoot Bob.

Speaker 2 (01:39):
Yeah, yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
Unless they know you.

Speaker 2 (01:42):
Yeah, I kind of noticed that this past week.

Speaker 1 (01:47):
Guilty Guilty.
Hey, I'm a girl and I get alittle crazy sometimes.

Speaker 2 (01:51):
You know it happens to the best of us, it's okay.

Speaker 1 (01:53):
It's because I'm a strong, independent woman.

Speaker 2 (01:59):
And so sometimes I struggle with that.
I like that about you.
I think it's one of the verymany attributes about you that
I'm drawn to.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
It's a blessing and a curse right.

Speaker 2 (02:10):
It is.

Speaker 1 (02:11):
So today we are going to talk about being single
parents, because that is one ofthe many things that you and I
have in common, and I don't knowhave you and Steven done an
episode where you guys havetalked about this?

Speaker 2 (02:25):
I don't think we have .
We've talked about his mom alot because his mom was my older
sister and she raised me, so wetalk about her a lot, but we've
never talked about his dad orthe process that we went through
and like the changes that wekind of went through like

(02:46):
together, because it was hard onboth of us.

Speaker 1 (02:50):
I guess I never even thought about Stephen's dad.
Sometimes I feel this is reallylike rude, but sometimes I
forget, like that the dads areas a single mom, like I just
forget about the dad sometimes,right, unless you see a dad
that's doing all the work andyou don't see the mom there.
But you guys have a reallydifferent situation.

(03:11):
So I'm glad that you broughtthat part up, because it's going
to go into my questioning thatI have for you, mm-hmm.
Okay.
So my first question since youare Stephen's uncle, were you
and Stephen always close?

Speaker 2 (03:27):
Yeah, because I was Stephen's mom, which is her name
, is Sandra.
She was seven years older thanme and she raised me.
So I was always with her allthe time and I was telling
Stephen this, like the other daythat I think I maybe got into
two arguments with her, maybethe whole the whole time I've
known her and I've always, youknow, two arguments with her,
maybe the whole time I've knownher and I've always respected

(03:52):
her a lot and I've always lookedup to her.
So I've always been in his life.
So when he was born I was thereand I held him whenever he was
born and I tell him this all thetime.
He gets so upset whenever I'mtalking about this but he had
some of the fluid in his eye andhis eye was really really like
big and bulgy, so I called himlobster eye and he hates that.

(04:15):
I know he's going to hear thisgoes oh you punk.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
Of all the stories you have to bring that one up.

Speaker 2 (04:22):
So I like held him whenever he was born and my
sister it was, you know, herfirst child and she was super
hungry and they, like you knowhow the doctors tell you don't
eat.
Oh I do and she didn't eat.
So she goes go to McDonald's,give me a double, give me like a
Big Mac, you know fries, youknow apple pie.

(04:42):
So I had to sneak it into thehospital and I and I gave it to
her.
and then she gave me the babySteven and I was, I was like
holding him while she was likeeating and stuff.
So it was kind of funny.

Speaker 1 (04:54):
When I had Mackie they told me the same thing,
like you can't eat right,because what if you need a
C-section for some reason?
And then you, if you're goingto get the anesthetic.
You're going to get theanesthetic.
You're going to vomit if youeat.
So that's why, and so I was sohungry because I went in.
I was induced with Mackie andso I went in at like 6.30 in the

(05:16):
morning and he wasn't bornuntil 5.44 in the evening, and
so I hadn't eaten anything and Iwas gestational diabetic when I
was pregnant.
And so as soon as he was born,they're like do you want to hold
your baby?
And I'm like no, I want a Pepsi, like full flavor Pepsi Go get
me one that is so funny Give methe sugar.

Speaker 2 (05:36):
So did you eat anything afterwards?

Speaker 1 (05:38):
So then, right, everything was closed and I was
really craving Pepsi which I didget my Pepsi because vending
machines but I was also likesuper craving fruit, like I just
really wanted fresh fruit.
And there was there's thisreally great place near the
hospital that I delivered calledBob's Produce, and they were
closed, and so then I never gotmy fruit.

(06:00):
I didn't eat I don't think Iate anything that night, I just
had my Pepsi and then I pouted,because that's what I do when I
don't go.

Speaker 2 (06:06):
You're such a soldier Because, like Sandra was, like
she was hangry and she goes, goget me something to eat.
Now I go, I can't bring it in.
She goes bring it and I go.
Okay, so I brought it.
What?

Speaker 1 (06:19):
are they going to do?

Speaker 2 (06:29):
Yeah, I brought it and so I've always been in his
life and like um, my sister,would you know, she would call
me when he was like 10 or 11 andhe wasn't like he, he didn't
come home from school.
He was playing freeze tag inthe very front of the school and
she called me and she says he'snot home and I was working
security at the time so if Ileft I lost money.
So I would go and pick him upand I said why is?
Why is your mom calling?
Why is your mom calling me?
And I was always in his life, Iwas always.
I wouldn't say I would, I wouldpunish him all the time, but I

(06:51):
was, I was his male figure, soyou were always kind of like an
authoritative and fun role, sothat didn't have to evolve or
change once I spoiled him somuch, so he got, he got, like he
got, uh, super nintendo.
She's got playstation one, two,three, four.
He got them all through me, uh.

Speaker 1 (07:12):
So I spoiled him a lot so when he knew you were mad
, it was in trouble.

Speaker 2 (07:19):
Yes, like it was serious because I, you know,
I'll tell him.
You know, even like to this dayday, his kids will question
whenever he's punishing them.
And he looks at me and he goesI never questioned you, I go.
No, you didn't.
So as soon as I would tell himone thing, he would just do it.
I said you're not playing videogames today, you're doing your
homework, you're going to eat,take a shower, do your homework

(07:41):
and go to bed.
He goes, okay, and he wouldjust do it.
So he was a really, really goodkid.

Speaker 1 (07:47):
I think that generational gap right Like.
I do believe I think Steven ismy age-ish.
He's probably younger than me,but I feel like we didn't.
It was like you.
I feel like when I was a kid itwas speak, when you're spoken
to be seen and not heard, and nomeans no, and nowadays it's
just not like that.

Speaker 2 (08:08):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:08):
Which there's pros and cons to that.

Speaker 2 (08:10):
Yeah, His kids ask questions and I tell them like I
don't butt into his parentingat all, Like I spoiled his kids
and that's it.
But every now and then I go heyguys, I'm just trying to help
you out, Probably should listento your dad, okay, Okay.
And I'd go, hey guys, I'm justtrying to help you out, Probably
should listen to your dad, Okay, Okay.
If you want to make it worse,keep talking, Keep talking.
Back, I tell them.

(08:31):
They go okay.
Uncle Robert, you know they'lllike listen from there.
I go okay.
I'm just trying to help you out.

Speaker 1 (08:38):
So did your relationship change with Steven
once he lost his mom.

Speaker 2 (08:43):
Yes, it did, Because it was really tough on both of
us.
Because, number one, you know,I was in my late 20s, early 30s,
whenever she passed and I wasso immature and I didn't know
how to budget and whenever I washungry I would go see her and I
didn't have any money.
She'd give me money and so Ididn't know how to budget

(09:04):
anything.
And then whenever he lost hismom, I couldn't yell at him
because he lost his mom, whichis his only parent, and I lost
my favorite sibling and we wereboth suffering and so I couldn't
really punish him or yell athim.
So it was really tough.
The first, I think two years wasreally tough because his grades

(09:27):
had had suffered a little bitbecause of that and, uh, it was
just really really tough.
I would just talk to himconstantly and I would talk to
his teachers and email histeachers, and so it changed
dramatically because I was likeI was always like authority with
him.
But then I had to just reel itback a little bit and not get so
worked up for stuff, Becauseyou're both grieving you know,

(09:52):
too, so you're trying to figureout your new situation.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (09:56):
And then you're also grieving.
Both of you are grieving a hugeloss.

Speaker 2 (10:01):
Yeah, and also at that time, whenever he graduated
, we, we both moved to Tulsa.
I just thought a new city, anew thing, should it should
happen for us.
And you know, we we did it andit kind of bonded us together,
because we're like we werereally dependent on each other
now, because we didn't have anyfamily there.
So I said okay, so it got reallyreally he and I got really

(10:24):
close and then we like movedback, like two years later, uh,
to the dallas fort worth area,so and then after that was good,
you know, and uh, we, we likefinish each other's sentences
sometimes and like we like hiswife, his wife will see us
arguing and thinking we'rearguing, we, we're really not.
We're not arguing, that's justhow we are.

Speaker 1 (10:47):
It's your dynamic.

Speaker 2 (10:48):
Yeah, so he's cussing at me, I'm cussing at him, but
we're doing it like in accentsor, like you know, like a
Japanese accent or a Russianaccent.
That's just how we do it, youknow.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
You almost have like your own language because,
you've been together so long.

Speaker 2 (11:11):
So yeah, so we, we just do that and uh, you know I
can't.
Whenever, whenever I got reallysick, I knew that he was pretty
concerned and I was really, Ifelt really bad.
I go, I'm sorry to put youthrough that.
So, uh, cause I know you knowhe, you know, cause Stephen's
gone through so much grief andhis mom, you know my dad, his
stepbrother, his sister, hisbest friend, so he's gone

(11:33):
through a lot of grief and so Itry to be, I try to, you know,
tap dance around that sometimes.

Speaker 1 (11:42):
Give him some grace yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:43):
Give him some grace yeah.

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(12:08):
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Speaker 2 (12:25):
It was seven of us.
I was the baby, and so my momand dad were working constantly.
They were constantly workingbecause my mom held two jobs, my
dad held three and so they wereconstantly working.
So they weren't in the house,like you know, parenting us.
I know she's going to hear thisand get mad.

Speaker 1 (12:46):
I parent you.
She was doing what she had todo.
I mean, that's way better thannot doing what she did, and you
know you have to do what youhave to do there.
I said you know, again I likebut, uh, yeah so.

Speaker 2 (13:02):
So my sister, she, she kind of raised me and she
would take me a bath, make sureI ate and make sure I did my
homework, and then put me to bedand then wake me up and then
get me ready for school.
So you know, she's one of thebest people I've ever known and
I used to tell her when she wason her deathbed.
I said I used to tell her go,let me trade places with you.

(13:24):
And she goes no, I would neverdo that.
I go, I go just let me do it.
And she goes, no, can't do it.
She was a she's a great ladyand you know I think about her
all the time.

Speaker 1 (13:38):
So what did she die from?

Speaker 2 (13:41):
Cervical cancer.

Speaker 1 (13:42):
Oh, my God.
She was more afraid of seeing adoctor than dying, than going,
yeah, so I work in women'shealth and so sometimes that's
what we see is the people whohave cervical cancer or breast
cancer A lot of times.
I haven't been in for 10, 15,20 years and it's.

Speaker 2 (14:02):
Checkups and stuff.

Speaker 1 (14:03):
You can look at a cervix and tell like it's not
good.

Speaker 2 (14:06):
Yeah, so she was.
She was a tough lady and youknow she was tough and I
respected her a great dealbecause, like she raised like
three kids by her, so she was asingle parent too, and I was
always there.
I was, I tried to be there forher, Like I she would.
She would buy groceries andI'll tell you this quick story
She'd buy groceries and like I,would.

(14:26):
I would alphabetize her, hercans, Like I would just put it
like a you know, I would just doit, because that's just how I
am.
And then the fall OCD.

Speaker 1 (14:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (14:38):
A little bit OCD and like the following day, she
would give it to her neighbor.
Everything that I worked on,she just gave it.
She gave the food to like to aneighbor because she felt that
they needed it more.
And I go what a, what a sweetlady.
I go, sandra, I.
I organized all that stuffbecause they needed it.

Speaker 1 (14:56):
You can organize it next time, yeah so, but yeah so
okay, I was going to say so, thetransition.
So Sandra dies, and now whathappens to Steven?
Did you guys have aconversation?
Was there a will, a trust?
Steven's?

Speaker 2 (15:14):
dad.
Yeah, there was a will and Ihad to go to court to finalize
it, and then I was going tochild support court after that
with his dad, and so I wasdealing with his dad and I think
I was the only male that was inthe court, the court seating.

(15:37):
They would put you in a waitingarea before I guess the sheriff
, or I forgot what it's calledthe judge, like the officer of
the court, would come get you.
You know they'll say, hey,you're up on the docket.
So I was the only male in therejust sitting in this way with
you know, just full of women,and they would tell me because,
honey, you're in the wrong room.
I said, no, I ain't.
No, I ain't, I'm here to getmoney too.

Speaker 1 (16:01):
Yeah right, it's not cheap to have a kid.

Speaker 2 (16:03):
No, no, so.
So yeah, right it's, it's notcheap to have a kid.
No, no, so his dad just wasn'tinvolved in his life.
His dad, uh, his dad was notinvolved in his life.
And then steven met him when hewas seven okay, and then, um, he
met steven and then just left,never came back.
You know, met him one time.
If he knew how cool steven wasor how great of a person he was,

(16:24):
he's just missing out becauseSteven's a great dad, he's a
great, you know.
He's a great nephew, he's agreat son to Sandra and he's
just, he's just a good kid.
If I had a kid that was half ascool as he was man, I'd be
alright.

Speaker 1 (16:40):
So was it hard to be a mom and a dad.

Speaker 2 (16:46):
It was.
It was Cause I was, you know,I'm sure you can relate to this
Cause.
It's like you know, I at thetime I wasn't ready to be a
parent and I was kind of thrustinto it and like, uh, steven and
I were with Sandra whenever shewas, gave her last breath and
she asked me to stop.
You know, know, take care ofsteven, make sure he sees the.

(17:08):
You know his brother and sister, because he, you know he had,
he has uh two like a youngerbrother and a younger sister.
He goes make sure that he seesvictor and ollie.
And she told me, stop drinking.
And I go, okay, I promise.
So I haven't drank since thenand so I've kept him involved
with his, with his othersiblings, and but yeah, it was,

(17:32):
it was pretty tough, it waspretty tough for me and I don't
know, it's actually his firsttime I actually talked about
that.

Speaker 1 (17:40):
So it is hard because for for me I mean for you at
least at least you're a guy andSteven's a guy, but for me I
don't really understand a lot ofwhat McCoy is going through as
a teenage boy.
I only know what I think I knowright, and so that's kind of

(18:00):
like a and he has a dad andwhatnot that he sees, but I
don't think that his dad talksabout that kind of stuff at all
or I talk about that kind ofstuff a lot, so you just hope
that you're doing the best youcan and hitting the right things
.
I was telling him about thissituation where I found out that

(18:22):
my friend was telling me thatshe ran into a friend she hadn't
seen in a long time and thefriend was telling her that her
17, she just found out her17-year-old daughter was 18
weeks pregnant and the father ofthe baby is 15.
So I was telling this to Macand Mac says to me Mom, that's
too late for plan B.

(18:42):
And I'm like how the fuck doyou know what plan B is Right?
We've never talked about that hehears it from the crowd, so
then I had to have this longconversation with him about plan
b and like do you know plan bis not 100 effective?
Do you know you have to takeplan b within a really small
window do you know?
Even if you take plan b, youcan still have a baby like plan

(19:04):
b is like really plan z, becauseyou should protect yourself and
she should be protectingherself and there really
shouldn't be a reason for plan B.

Speaker 2 (19:13):
Yeah, I know, I know by by listening to your podcast
and I'm I'm, you know, you knowthis about me.
I'm a great fan of your podcast.
You're pretty open with Mackieabout stuff and sometimes he
sounds like he does.
He's not ready to, ready tohear these questions and he goes
.
You know he goes.
I don't know, I don't know.

Speaker 1 (19:32):
I think that's just like divert, Like I don't want
to talk about that yeah, yeah.
He's been, I have, I have beenthis kind of mom his entire life
.

Speaker 2 (19:39):
I mean.

Speaker 1 (19:40):
I haven't changed at all.
I've, it's the one thing my momdid with me that I'm really
grateful for is she was alwayssuper open and talked about
things, and if you had aquestion or if somebody, if you
heard a word and you didn't knowwhat it meant, or kids were
talking about something and youdidn't know what that meant,
like it was okay to come homeand say, hey, I heard this today
at school.
What does that mean?

Speaker 2 (20:00):
Right.

Speaker 1 (20:01):
Just so that you weren't put in a stupid
situation and then kind of peerpressured into doing something
you didn't want to do becauseyou didn't even know what it was
, or just looking.
If you look stupid in school,you get picked on.

Speaker 2 (20:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (20:19):
You did back then.
I don't know.
I feel like the kids are justeveryone just doesn't care about
anyone else anymore, which isprobably okay to stay in your
own lane.
So I just feel like the moreeducation I can thrust at him,
hopefully he absorbs some of ituh, I was gonna ask you about
with your situation, I meanbeing a single parent.

Speaker 2 (20:36):
You know how hard was it for you to just deal with
like everyday stuff, like bills,mackie, because, like your mom
was still alive at that time,right right Was she was she
taking care of him too.

Speaker 1 (20:51):
So my mom, so I got divorced when Mack was six and
my mom watched Mackie for thefirst year of his life and then
she's like he needs to be aroundother kids.
So he was in daycare, Um, but Ifeel like by the time I got
divorced he was in school.
So, right, daycare wasn't ahuge issue.

(21:12):
He had an iPad and so I wouldsay you have to FaceTime me when
you get home from school everyday so that I know you're safe,
and you have to FaceTime meevery morning before you're
going to go to school so that Iknow you got up and got to
school.
So that was okay.
And then in the summertime mymom would help me again so that
I know you got up and got toschool.
So that was okay.
And then in the summertime mymom would help me again so that
I didn't have to pay for anykind of daycare or anything like

(21:33):
that.
So we just kind of made it workand, to be honest, when I
decided that I wanted to get adivorce, I didn't care if I had
to live in my car, because I wasthat miserable.

Speaker 2 (21:44):
Wow, I have to applaud you because you know and
I hate putting this stigma onmost women, but most women would
just deal with it and just stay, and I applaud you for making a
better, you know a badsituation into a better
situation, even though at thetime it probably didn't look
that way.

Speaker 1 (22:03):
I just got to the point where I was like, if I I
remember thinking like I wasfolding Mackie's laundry in his
bedroom and I was just thinkinglike if I get sick with like
some kind of chronic terminalillness, who's going to take
care of me?
Not this guy.
And I just thought like I don't.

(22:24):
My parents got divorced when Iwas 26, and that was a nightmare
Trying to they.
You know, my mom was like Ijust waited until all my kids
were grown up, because then itwould be easier, because then
you guys had like everything youwanted and you got to live in a
big, beautiful house and blah,blah, blah and like that sucked.

Speaker 2 (22:40):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (22:40):
Talk about trying to parent your parents Not cool.
No, so not cool.
So I was.
I didn't want to end up likethat and I felt like when I was
32, I still had time to findlove and to find a happy ending
and for Mackie to see a healthyrelationship yeah, I think at

(23:01):
any age when you divorce, it'sit's never so, it's never a good
time, but I asked Mackie, like,do you remember when your dad
and I were together?
And he says I just remember youguys yelled at each other a lot,
but that's really all Iremember.

Speaker 2 (23:16):
Wow, that's not a good memory, no.

Speaker 1 (23:19):
But I mean, at least he didn't remember a lot of the
other stuff that he could have.

Speaker 2 (23:23):
Well, I'm glad you got yourself out of that
situation.
It all he could have.

Speaker 1 (23:27):
Well, I'm glad you got yourself out of that
situation and it all worked out.

Speaker 2 (23:29):
Yeah, I think I think this is me and I know you're
going to.
I think you're doing a greatjob and I know I'm not in that
state with you, but just to hearyou know your concern for
Mackie on your podcast and andhow you try to help him and
while you're doing a podcast,because I imagine it's like that

(23:50):
off scene too, so so but uh itis, it is right.

Speaker 1 (23:53):
But like, when you're doing a podcast, you're, you're
on and you're.
It's funny because I got I wasdoing a podcast by myself the
other night and then I was onthe phone and the person I
talked to they're like you'restill using your podcast voice.
I'm like, I'm sorry, like it'sa thing, right you have to, like
, get in a zone and then ittakes a while to get kind of
back out of the zone.

Speaker 2 (24:12):
And.

Speaker 1 (24:13):
I mean I do struggle with depression and sadness and
getting in ruts, and sosometimes you know it is a
struggle and but Mackie has toldme he's like, mom, don't be a
victim, Like you can make it abetter day.
Yeah, I don't want to.
I don't want to be that personwhere my kids don't tell me not
to be a victim.

(24:34):
Yeah, and I think he's overover dramatizing the situation,
but he does like it slaps me inthe face like get your shit
together yeah, I think, uh, youknow, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (24:47):
I think before I got sick, I was always depressed a
lot.
I had some times where I justbreak down, you know, just by
myself.
But as I've gone through thatillness and I've gotten better,
I don't know I think I'm just areally positive.

Speaker 1 (25:06):
It's almost like you had a second chance at life.

Speaker 2 (25:07):
Yeah, I'm very optimistic about stuff and I I
say I say this, and Steven hatesit.
I say it's not personal, it'sjust business, because people
are not in the business ofDominguez, then if they don't
want to be in my life, then theydon't want to be in my life.
I'm okay with it.
If they can't, if they want togreat, they don't great.
So I'm going to keep truckingand I'm going to keep moving.

(25:29):
So it just doesn't True.

Speaker 1 (25:32):
Because people that you have to like beg to be there
.
They are toxic, it's not it'snot worth it.

Speaker 2 (25:38):
Yeah, I had a.
I had a roommate that was on myshow.
I'm not going to say her name,I'm not going to say her name,
but she was on my show.
She was on my first threeseasons of my show and then when
I got sick she was absent.
She didn't go see me in thehospital and I thought we were

(26:02):
friends and we were neverromantic or anything like that.
But I just thought she was myfriend and she wasn't around and
she spazzed on me and I go okay, well, I'm not going to take it
personal, it's business.
So, business of Dominguez, soshe's out.

Speaker 1 (26:18):
Sometimes I think, like before my mom died, I
didn't know how to deal withdeath and people that were
grieving or sick or what to door what to say or how to act.
So sometimes I do give peoplesome grace in that maybe they
just don't know what to do.
And so they take a step backbecause that's the only way they

(26:40):
know how to manage it forthemselves.
But I think you learn a lotonce you go through something
terrible, but it's I think youlearn a lot once you go through
something terrible.

Speaker 2 (26:47):
It's tough, cause like I, you know, I lost my dad
and there's not, and he died atno three and there's not a day
that goes by that I don't thinkabout him and I wake up
sometimes I said, man, I got tocall dad.
Oh wait, I can't, cause he, youknow, he's passed about them a
lot and I think about my sistera lot.
I tell people who actually dealwith grief and stuff I said

(27:13):
whatever I'm going to say to youis not going to help you.
It's only time that's going tohelp you.
And then you're never going toforget.
You're never going to forgetabout these people If they're
really close to you and theyhurt, if you're being hurt by
their absence.
It's always going to be thatway, but it's just time it's
going to help it, but it's nevergoing to go away.

(27:34):
So that's just what I say.

Speaker 1 (27:36):
I always tell people too.
Sometimes you have to ask forwhat you need, and it's okay,
because if the right people arein your life, they're going to
respect that and they're goingto step up.
But people don't always knowwhat you need and what you want,
and sometimes it's space andsometimes it's suffocation and
sometimes it's somewhere inbetween.

(27:57):
But it's okay to vocalize whatyou need.
Right, yeah, I'm down with that, and we always need food and we
always need a clean house.
So feed us and clean our house.

Speaker 2 (28:10):
And feed the bunnies and the chickens.

Speaker 1 (28:12):
And do all the farm chores.
Yes, no I really like doingthat, so don't take that away
from me.
No, no.

Speaker 2 (28:21):
If it makes you happy , then do it.
You know, what always gets onme is writing.
I like to write stories andthat's just how I am.
And I was collecting, like Iwas collecting a bunch of comic
books and I I don't know anymore, I don't know if I told you I
sold them all.

Speaker 1 (28:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (28:37):
I just sold them all Cause.

Speaker 1 (28:39):
I Do you regret that.

Speaker 2 (28:43):
No, I, I, I don't care about deal.
I just look at thingsdifferently.
I'm a big Cowboy fan, a bigDonald Stars fan, a big
Mavericks fan.
I used to live with they won orlost, and now I don't care, I
go.
You know what?
It's cool?
It's just a game.
It's fun to watch, it'sentertainment, right.

Speaker 1 (29:02):
Yeah, it's just business yeah.

Speaker 2 (29:05):
You're going to start saying it too.
That's, it's just business.
Yeah, you're going to startsaying it too.
So that's just how I look atstuff now.
So I just, you know, you know,being a single parent is doing
all that I said, man, that's,that was really hard.
That was really hard.
You know, going through my, myprocedure, that was really hard.
But, man, you know, stephenused to ask me all the time my

(29:29):
mom's calling me steven, and Itell her all the time I'm doing
a show and she'll, like, she'llstill call me.
But, um, she, uh, you know, heused to ask me all the time
because do you think you want tohave kids, you know, and I go
no, you were enough, you wereenough.

Speaker 1 (29:42):
so because he, was he , uh, was he a cock block for
you, like, did he prevent youfrom having a relationship in
your own?

Speaker 2 (29:50):
He's going to hate this.
He's going to hate this.
There was, there was a girl.
I'll just, I'll just say herfirst name was Angela and he
hated her.
He hated her with a passion.
He hated her with a passion andI I cause, like whenever,
whenever I first met her, youknow, um, sandra had just passed

(30:12):
and I would.
I was telling her I go, I go,steven is the most important
thing in the world to me.
I go if you don't mind beingnumber two, you know we can make
this work.
I go, if you're okay with that,we're good.
And she said, okay, yeah, I'mgood with it.
And she wasn't.
So you know I would dropeverything for Steven.
You know, whatever he needed, Iwould take care of it.

(30:34):
And you know there's sometimesI didn't go out with her because
I was dealing with Steven andshe didn't like it and he hated
her, he hated her.
Laugh.

Speaker 1 (30:44):
I think that that is like the most honorable thing.
Like you want a good personyeah somebody who puts their
like nephew that is now theirson first.
If you don't respect that, yeah, get the fuck out.

Speaker 2 (30:57):
Steven was right yeah , because, like, she wanted to
get married, she wanted to havekids, um, but I go, uh, you know
I couldn't do it, I, you knowit's, you know I couldn't do it,
you know it's.
So you know if cause, like, andI dated another girl named
Angela, and every time I talkabout Angela he would say the
good Angela or the bad Angela.

Speaker 1 (31:20):
And I would just laugh.
Well, that's good that therewas a good one for a little bit,
yeah, so yeah, there was, therewas a couple.

Speaker 2 (31:27):
There was a couple girls that I had to give up
because Stephen didn't like them.

Speaker 1 (31:33):
Way to go, stephen, but you know it's all good.

Speaker 2 (31:39):
I think I'm on the path where I'm supposed to be
anyway.
So I thought a lot of times Iwas brought back.
I don't know why, but I'llfigure it out and when I see it
I'll know it.

Speaker 1 (31:51):
That's true.
I like that.
All right.
I have a couple more questions,even though I know we're at the
30 minute, because you know Iknew we'd talk forever, so I had
to try to tell you to keep itshort.

Speaker 2 (31:59):
But here I am.

Speaker 1 (32:00):
Blah, blah, blah.
Did you and Steven ever driftapart, Like when he got, when he
graduated high school and likestarted living his own life?
Did you guys ever kind of drift?

Speaker 2 (32:12):
No, not at all.
Whenever, whenever he got Blairpregnant and then they had the
kids cause, I told him stay withme, you know I'll pay for
everything.
Save your money, get you avehicle, get you a place, and
then you can move out.
And he was like I had lived bymyself before.

(32:32):
And so whenever he and Blairand the kids finally moved out,
they bought a car, they had adown payment, they saved some
money, they moved into anapartment.
I think he was worried about me, that I was going to be by
myself.
Because you hadn't been for along time for a while and I go
and I told him.
I said I lived by myself beforeyou were born and I can live by

(32:55):
myself now, I'm good.
So no, we we've never driftedapart, we like we, we would talk
every day and text each otherevery day and send memes to each
other every day.
So, uh, I don't know, I justI'm not going to say he's my
favorite nephew, but he's myfavorite nephew, but I just love

(33:19):
him to death.

Speaker 1 (33:19):
I don't think you even have to say that out loud.

Speaker 2 (33:21):
We all know I just love him so much and I would do
anything for him.
So I told him if something wereto happen and I would protect
them and I would draw someone'sattention while he escaped Him
and the boys escaped.

Speaker 1 (33:39):
Take a bullet, yeah, I would.

Speaker 2 (33:41):
I would do it in a heartbeat for him.
So he's just, he's such a goodkid and you know he's my legacy,
so you know.

Speaker 1 (33:52):
What's it like now seeing him as a husband and a
dad and a grown man and havinghis own family?

Speaker 2 (33:59):
I'm really proud of him.
I'm really proud of him and I,I I've told him this, I go, I
don't say this enough to you,but I'm really proud, and um,
and then he'll like cuss at meafterwards, cause he wants to,
he wants to, not, you know.

Speaker 1 (34:15):
Don't get too.
You know sappy.

Speaker 2 (34:17):
Yeah, because I still hug him, like he I mean, I'm
sure, mackie's the same way youknow because, like you know, he
might not be, but when Stevengot to an age he didn't want me
hugging him anymore.

Speaker 1 (34:28):
Oh, mackie knows he has to and he'll be like mom,
are you going to go to bed soon?
Do you want a hug?
I'm like, yeah, you better getyour ass over here.

Speaker 2 (34:34):
Yeah, because I still hug Steven, even if he doesn't
like it, and I'll kiss him.
And then I'll just hug and kisshim and his kids are going,
because I hug and kiss his kidsa lot.
I love his kids so much.

Speaker 1 (34:48):
Just don't do it on the lips and it's fine.

Speaker 2 (34:50):
Yeah, of course, but he's like screaming whenever I'm
hugging him.

Speaker 1 (34:59):
He'll remember that forever, and he will.
He will really appreciate itsomeday.

Speaker 2 (35:03):
Yeah, I mean.

Speaker 1 (35:04):
He's got to act tough .
You know, it's just what.
That's what you guys do.

Speaker 2 (35:07):
I don't not anymore.

Speaker 1 (35:09):
I know Well, not you, but did you ever?

Speaker 2 (35:16):
When I was in Oak Cliff.
Growing up in Oak Cliff, it's arough part of Dallas, so you
had to be.
Then you were tough yeah youhad to be tough and I hated
being tough.
But you know, I know I'm toughbecause you know I came back
from the dead.

Speaker 1 (35:27):
Yeah, not many people can say that, nope.

Speaker 2 (35:30):
So but but yeah, Do you ever feel that way about you
and Mackackie?
Are y'all dressed in the parkbecause he, because he games a
lot and hell.

Speaker 1 (35:40):
No, I won't let.
That kid is attached to me goodI one time.
We had a meeting one time andthey were like talking about
like we've been talking to macabout his plans after high
school.
If he wants to go to college,if he wants to get an apartment,
blah, blah, blah and I go.
Did he say he wants to live incollege?
If he wants to get an apartment, blah, blah, blah and I go?
Did he say he wants to live inhis mom's basement forever?
Because that's what I want?

(36:04):
no one should want that yeah,I'm like okay, but you know,
sometimes we'll see people likesleeping on the um, sleeping on
the bus bench and and whatever.
Or I'll see people at the gasstation and I'll say like if you
don't get your shit together,that's going to be you, it's
going to be you.
Or you see that guy, he's notcrazy, that's math.
That's what math will do to you.

(36:24):
He's like mom, I'm not going todo that.

Speaker 2 (36:29):
You know, it was funny when, I think Steve and I
had gone with my ex, we had goneto Snoop Dogg Korn Lincoln Park
concert and we were on thegrass and there was this group
in front of us.
One of them had overdosed andshe started convulsing and her

(36:52):
friends just got up and left andhe looked at Steven was like 12
or 13 at the time.
He looked over to me and goeswhat's wrong with her?
I said that's what happenswhenever you're on drugs.
He goes Uncle Robert, I'm nevergoing to do drugs.
So the paramedics came, theypicked her up and, you know,
wheeled her out.
But I had to take advantage ofthat situation and that way he

(37:13):
didn't do drugs.
You know he doesn't.
He doesn't do drugs, he, herarely even drinks.
So yeah but uh, but yeah, he's,he's pretty good kid and and I'm
pretty sure you know the way,the way I hear the podcast max
max good kid too.

Speaker 1 (37:28):
So he's got a.
He has a good, kind heart, yeah, so that's really important to
me.
He has good manners, he knowswhere and when things are okay.
So, yeah, I'm proud of him.
Every time I go to conferencesthey always say you have such a
kind son.
He's always polite, he's alwaysrespectful, and that means the

(37:52):
world to me, because I alwayswant him to treat people well
and be kind and know how totreat women and know how to have
a healthy relationship.

Speaker 2 (38:02):
So do you see him being like a good father?

Speaker 1 (38:07):
You know we talk about if he wants to have kids
and he doesn't know.

Speaker 2 (38:11):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (38:12):
I really want to be a grandma someday.
So he better, he better, and Isay you can wait until you're 30
.
That's a great age, or waituntil you're sure.
Wait until you've been withsomebody for a long time.
Make sure that they're the one,because sometimes things are
worth the wait.

Speaker 2 (38:29):
Yeah, I tell my nieces all the time I go.
This is it's not foolproof, butI go.
You got to do it without asking.
You have to observe the guy howhe treats his mom and his
sisters.

Speaker 1 (38:42):
Don't ask the question.

Speaker 2 (38:42):
Just see it If he treats his mom and his sisters
with a lot of respect, then he'sgoing to do the same to you,
right?
If he does, if you see himyelling at him, that's going to
be you in about two years, yep.
So, um, totally out of people'scontrol too.

Speaker 1 (38:59):
But I think that kids , males raised with all females
or all sisters, tend to havemore empathy.

Speaker 2 (39:08):
Yeah.
Yeah, I agree Because, likeSandra, she was on me about
stuff like that and uh, I don'tknow.
I just respected her a greatdeal as a parent, as a sister,
so I never wanted to disappointher.

Speaker 1 (39:27):
When you died for a little bit, did she say you get
your ass back down there, You'renot done.

Speaker 2 (39:33):
You know, whenever I woke up I didn't know what
happened to me and my one of mybrothers said hey, did you see
dad, did you see Sandra?
And I looked at him confusedand my other brother was like
you know.
He was doing this with his handover the over the neck.
So he asked me after, after Iwas able to like talk and stuff,
he said do you do you know whathappened?

(39:57):
I go, I go, no.
He says you died for sevenminutes.
And, um, did you see mom?
I mean because it goes, did yousee sandra?
Or dad?
I go, no.
And I was.
I felt like I was in a dream,like I had just fallen asleep,
and I woke up and you don'tremember anything.

Speaker 1 (40:08):
I don't remember anything.

Speaker 2 (40:09):
I'm like I steven, and I talked about this on the
podcast and I actually brokedown because I told him.
I said, man, I man, I go.
What, if you know that scaresme, because you know people talk
about seeing the light orwhatever, or seeing heaven or
something I go, I didn't seeanything, I go.
What does that mean?
Does that mean that I'm not agood person, you know?
And he says, he says no, Idon't think of it that way, and

(40:33):
what he told me just reassuredme and I was really softened by
that.
But he says what if grandma notgrandma?
He says grandpa and mom knewthat if you saw whatever you
were going to see, you wouldn'twant to come back.
True, and they made you forgetit.
So you can come back and I go,okay.
And then I felt at ease afterhe told me me that I go, man,

(40:57):
he's giving me wisdom and I'msupposed to be giving him wisdom
, and so it's supposed to goboth ways yeah, so um do you
ever have like dreams now whereit's like feels almost like a
surreal experience, but didn't.

Speaker 1 (41:11):
But you know, I didn't really happen.

Speaker 2 (41:13):
I had dreams.
I had dreams about my sisterright after she passed and I
would always see her For somereason.
We were at an airport and shewas on the upper level and there
was no way to get to her.
And I would tell her go, stayright there, stay right there.
And I would run to an escalator30 yards down and I would go up

(41:35):
and I would run to the spotwhere she was at and she was
gone.
And I would always have thatreoccurring dream, like right
after she passed, and then my,my father, whenever he passed.
He was, he was, he was.
He died in the hospital and mymom wanted to sue the hospital
and she left.
She put me in charge of allthat and I was getting stressed

(41:58):
about it.
I was getting all the paperwork, trying to find a lawyer, and I
had a dream that night that mydad walked up to me.
I couldn't see his face but Iknew it was him.
He put his hand on my shoulderand he says let it go.
And the next day I told my mom.
I said I'm not going to pursuethis because dad told me not to
and she was so mad at me.

(42:18):
She talked to me for like twomonths, but you know, that's the
only thing I could.
Hopefully I answered thatquestion.

Speaker 1 (42:29):
Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 2 (42:29):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (42:31):
Well, do you have any other questions for me or
anything else you want to talkabout?

Speaker 2 (42:35):
Well, do you have any other questions for me or
anything else you want to talkabout?
I just wanted to.
You know, like I've said thisbefore, I think you're doing a
great job with Mackie and I justthink of you as such a good
person and I know.

(42:57):
You know like you and me we gothrough these times when you
know it's kind of troubling andstuff like that.

Speaker 1 (43:00):
I just want you to know that I'm always there for
you.

Speaker 2 (43:02):
I just wanted to tell you that I know, so um, I
appreciate you nope, no problem,because I I don't know, I just
gravitated toward you and yourpodcast and I you know it's just
so weird because I heard yourpodcast and I saw it on Facebook
and I just tuned in and Ireally liked it.
And now I'm talking to you.

Speaker 1 (43:19):
I know I feel like we have really developed a strong
friendship, so it is crazy howlife works out like that.

Speaker 2 (43:26):
Yeah, and so I was listening to, like Sarah
Bignall's Yowie Central podcast.
I always listened to my friendmatt, I listen to my my friend
wes anderson, I listen to myother friend, uh, porch manners.
But you know you're right atthe top, so and I've told them
that, I've told them that, thatyou know at the time that their

(43:46):
podcast was on top, but I justheard yours more and I go, man,
you know, to get me through theday I was, I was listening to
your podcast.

Speaker 1 (43:54):
So well, thank you.
Well, now you're a guestco-host for a while.

Speaker 2 (43:59):
Anytime you need me, anytime you need me yeah.

Speaker 1 (44:02):
So we're going to do future episodes together, for
sure.

Speaker 2 (44:04):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (44:05):
And in the meantime, where can everyone find you or
hear your podcast?

Speaker 2 (44:11):
You can find, or whatever you want to tell them.
You can find our podcast ononourbestbehaviorcom, podcastcom
, social media and the web blog.
Right, you have a web blog.

Speaker 1 (44:25):
I meant yours you silly yes okay, this is for you
to promote yourself.

Speaker 2 (44:30):
No, I'm good.

Speaker 1 (44:34):
Well, you can find Bigfoot Bob at Bigfoot Club,
wherever you listen to podcastsand on social media Facebook and
Instagram.
Bigfoot Club.

Speaker 2 (44:42):
Yeah, we're even on Alexa.
So if you say, Alexa playBigfoot Club, it plays it Sweet.
Yeah, too sweet.

Speaker 1 (44:50):
My Alexa.
I don't like her, so I justunplugged her Did you really.
Because every time she makes anoise, my dogs go crazy.

Speaker 2 (44:59):
Does it make weird noises?

Speaker 1 (45:01):
Like if somebody's at the door, it will be like bloop
, bloop, bloop.
Really or if somebody drivestheir car by because it's on
that geo-fence or whatever, orif there's an update, then the
dogs just think someone's at thedoor.
If that, if she chirps at all,they think someone's at the
goddamn door.

Speaker 2 (45:19):
No one's at the door.
Hey, I wanted to thank you alsofor doing that.
That soundbite for me.

Speaker 1 (45:24):
Oh yeah, yeah, you're going to use it soon.

Speaker 2 (45:26):
Yeah, Probably on our next episode we're going to.
I was supposed to interview amoon girl tonight but she
canceled on me because she wasdoing something else.
So Steven and I are going to doan episode tomorrow on the Nazi
bell, so have you heard of it?

Speaker 1 (45:43):
aren't you doing like a cool witch lady?

Speaker 2 (45:46):
yeah, the well the moon girl.
We were supposed to do ittonight.
She had some other things thatshe had to do.
She's in the tarot cards.
Yeah, she had some other thingsthat she had to do, so she's in
the tarot cards.

Speaker 1 (46:00):
Yeah, and so we're going to interview her tonight,
but next week we're interviewingJocelyn.

Speaker 2 (46:04):
She's got like over like 50 haunted dolls or
something.

Speaker 1 (46:07):
Yeah, that's creepy.
So, that's like Annabelle yeah.

Speaker 2 (46:13):
I think actually she went.
She's from Tulsa and she drovedown to San Antonio because Anna
Annabelle was on a tour and soshe drove down like I think two
weeks ago and she showedpictures of her standing next to
Annabelle.

Speaker 1 (46:28):
So she was really like that'll be fun to listen,
yeah.

Speaker 2 (46:31):
I can't wait to ask her questions about that, so but
but yeah, steven and I aredoing an episode tomorrow on the
Nazi bell.

Speaker 1 (46:39):
Okay.
Well we'll listen to that.
Well, thank you for joining usfor another episode of On Our
Best Behavior and I promise I'llsee you next week.
Hey friends, quick update I'madding a new little segment to
the podcast called I don't know,random Thoughts, midnight

(46:59):
Thoughts or Pet Peeves.
With Kelly.
It's exactly what it soundslike those late night brain
spirals, random things I can'tstop thinking about, or little
everyday annoyances that justneed to be said out loud, short,
sweet and maybe a littleunhinged, but always real.
So stay tuned for thesebite-sized moments sprinkled

(47:26):
between our regular episodes.
Let's get weird.
How come I have a queen bed allto myself, minus my two dogs
that have to lay right on top ofme so that I cannot move and I
cannot be comfortable.
Therefore I cannot sleep wellat night.
They're lucky, they're cute.
Does anyone actually playChumba Casino?

(47:47):
Because they have so manycommercials and their
advertising budget must be huge.
So if you actually play thatgame, send me a message and let
me know.
If One of my biggest pet peevesis when people who work
somewhere think that they needto park up close to the building

(48:09):
where clients or patients orcustomers are supposed to park,
and I see that it's you, becauseyou have a distinct bumper
sticker on your car and I justfeel like that's super lazy.
Come on, people.
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