September 26, 2025 • 48 mins
Join Opie for a wild FU Friday on the Opie Radio podcast, live from NYC at sunrise! This episode dives into the hilarious escalator conspiracy surrounding Trump at the UN, his takeover of TikTok, and why gas prices and healthcare still suck. Opie shares a laugh-out-loud rant about the chaos of apple picking, reminisces about caddying for mafia guys, and gets personal with a proud dad moment about his daughter’s volleyball victory. From government shutdown threats to debunking Charlie Kirk conspiracies, it’s a rollercoaster of rants, laughs, and real talk. Tune in for Opie’s unfiltered take on it all!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
There we are. Good morning, everybody. Welcome to the Opie
Radio podcast. As the son comes up behind me there
here in New York City. My god, we got breaking
news right off the bat. Donald J. Trump has ordered
a full investigation into the Epstein files. Finally. Oh wait,
(00:22):
I read that wrong. He's actually has ordered a full
investigation into the escalator that stopped at the UN. I
got that wrong. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I apologize for that.
It is f you, Friday. Make sure you let us
know in the chat what has bothered you recently or
this week. Yeah, the escalator is a big FU. Trump is.
(00:44):
Trump is in the chat and he said f escalators.
You know. Famously earlier this week he went to the
UN to give one of his speeches, and he's with
Milania and they're getting ready to go up the escalator
and then the escalator stops dead in its tracks. A
lot of people saying it's a conspiracy, that was some
(01:06):
kind of plot to possibly take out Trump and then
Trump because you know, he was born with a silver
spoon in his mouth. I don't think the guy's ever
driven a car. I don't think he has a driver's license.
I don't think Trump ever jumped in a pool. I
don't think Trump ever got on a paddle board. I
don't think Trump ever took a little ride upstate to
(01:29):
check out the Fall Foliage. So, uh, when the escalator,
excuse me, stopped, Trump was like, what is that? I
don't know, I don't know how to walk upstairs, so
he just stopped and stood there. Jesus, But there's a
(01:50):
there's a logical explanation for the escalator stopping at the
un even though Trump has demanded a full investigation into
the thing, it turns out that there was a photographer. Uh,
he was on the escalator with the Trumps, and he
was on the escalator going backwards so he could get
(02:12):
his his video or his pictures or both. And because
of this clod being on the escalator backwards, he he
he he he he uh. Isn't that the noise of
(02:34):
an ambulance in England? He haw he haw he He
tripped a censor and that's what stopped the escalator. That's it.
That's all it is. There's there's nothing more. I know.
You guys that do conspiracy theories all over the internet,
oh my god, you'll have a twelve parts series on
all sorts of angles with the escalator and and you'll
(02:57):
you'll milk it to the cows come home. But in
the end it was just a clod going up the
escalator backwards with his camera ko Jan k jan ko
jan kochink and he tripped a censor and that's what
stopped the escalator. All right. With that, I said, good
morning to Jerry Shep Bardini. Good morning, Open squad, Good
morning to you, Jerry Shep Bardini. Welcome, welcome, welcome, Hi,
Nick High, Ted Pallawata. We got Tyler saying fake views fake?
(03:23):
What's the fake views there? Tyler? Explain your fake views concept?
You all right? Tyler? Edy Violin up there at already
high high high. We got the Jay Warren. I was
very bothered by Darryl Kaby on the subway. Who's that?
(03:45):
I swear to God, who's that? Can help me out
with that one too, Sir? Looking haggard? Oh my boy,
I'm not looking haggard. I'm looking fucking beautiful. Look at
those baby blue eyes. You're trying too hard with your
Hey bitch, what's up? Scot watching up? How are you
you good? I hope you good? Ah, brother man, brother
man coming in from the spawn. What's up, spawning? How
(04:08):
are you? What are the bets this weekend? Who are
you taking? I need to know, man, there's a lot
of corruption in sports, right spawn. They made the gambling
so legal that it's so it's getting harder and harder
for these these players not to not to go for
the temptation of dropping a ball, making it look like like,
(04:34):
you know, it wasn't dropped on purpose. And then there's
some koching, koching koching on the side. Right, it's making
it harder and harder for these athletes to play it,
to play it straight. Oh by god, I think more
and more, more and more of that is going to
come out of the in the coming months. I think,
you know, players suspicious plays that you know should have
(04:59):
should have been caught because you know, the person wants
to make a few bucks, a few bucks on the side,
wants to make way more money than the salary he's
getting for playing his sport. Maybe the silver spoon was
in a concrete bag. Charles says, Look, man, I think
it's pretty obvious that you know the Trumpster. I don't
(05:20):
think the Trumpster ever played street hockey. I don't think
the Trumpster ever got on a skateboard. I don't think
the young Trumpster just just as a goof decided to,
you know, jump a little rope. You know. Trump was
just born, just born to be rich, just born to
(05:43):
be taken care of, just born to just do business.
And speaking of which, oh my god, this is breaking.
I forgot about this one. Trump is basically, see I
read between the headlines. Trump is basically he's gonna He's
gonna control the TikTok. Yes, he is. Everyone knows the TikTok.
(06:09):
You know, it was spying on all of us, this
Chinese company as we're doing our silly, fucking TikTok videos.
I think half of America has TikTok. That would be
what would that be? What would that be? I wrote
it down, one hundred and seventy million of us have TikTok.
And then it came out, oh my god, the Chinese
they're spying on us, They're stealing our information. We got
(06:31):
to control the TikTok. And the funny part about that
when they said that the Chinese were spying on us,
you know, and it's very very dangerous. This was coming
from politicians that were on the say it with me.
They were also on the TikTok. So if it was
(06:51):
so dangerous and the Chinese were spying on us, why
were our politicians also on the TikTok? I ask you
that question today. But Trump, Uh, he signed an executive order.
Oh my god, these executive orders with that, with that
exhausting Trump signature, and then he does that weird at
(07:20):
the end. Oh my god. I think Trump has the
most exhausting signature in the history of man. I I
don't even know what there's not There's not that many
letters in his name. He's just he's just adding letters.
Oh by, can you imagine going out to dinner with
the Trump? I got this, And then he's signing. He's
signing his his his bill are rubers here, I'm just
(07:53):
signing the check at the end. If you watched him
sign executive orders, you understand there at the end. Okay,
But he uh, he signed an executive order at the
White House yesterday. They just hand him those things. He's
signing them left and right. Oh my god, maybe he
(08:15):
could sign executive order to bring my career back. Anyway,
he signed an order. Uh, he's he has approved a
TikTok deal. This is the this is the the workaround, right. Uh,
(08:36):
It's gonna continue operating in the United States of America.
But I think this is the this is the pinnacle
of TikTok. And I think, just like a lot of
other social media platforms, I think I think the down,
the downturn is going to start, uh in the in
the in the coming months because Trump has decided, Look,
you know, we're gonna keep TikTok alive in America, but
(08:59):
I'm gonna control it. He's basically saying I'm going to
control it, and he basically said it's not gonna it's
not gonna lean lean one way or the other politically.
That's what That's what I learned as I was getting
ready for this live stream. Trump approves TikTok deal, and
we'll be run by close Trump allies. That means Trump
will be running Oh my god, a UFO is going
(09:21):
by my window. Too bad, I don't have the camera
pointed that way. But he's going to control it. And
TikTok has valued at you know, fourteen billion dollars. My god,
So there there you have it. Why the hell we
(09:41):
up right now? Man? That's A, that's a very good question, Joel.
I get that a lot, you know, with the Ryder
Cup out there and uh in Beth Page, Uh, you know,
getting up this early, it just reminds me of the
only other real job I had, and I was being
a caddie, and you had to be at the golf
course before the sun came up if you wanted a loop, Yo, Lou,
(10:03):
where's my loop? Lou is my caddy master, and he
would call young greggy, young greggy pants off the caddy
bench to uh, you know, take a couple of bags, actually,
a couple of bags and a couple of putters. I
would caddy for foursomes. Yeah, you put two heavy bags
on your shoulders and yeah, you carry the two putters
(10:26):
of the two guys in the cart, and you went
around a goddamn golf course in four hours. My god.
So for me, this is like, this is easy to
get up this early, very very easy. Although I'm sleeping
in uh lately, I used to get up at four
four thirty, but now I'm squeezing to five thirty. Now
that's good. That's a. That's an improvement. But they're doing
(10:51):
the Rider Cup. Who cares on long Island. You know,
it's us against them who cares? And I love my golf,
but it's it's it's a fake. It's a fake us
against them tournaments. Uh, but they're playing the beth Page
Black And what what is cool? For me? And a
lot of golfers and a lot of Long Islanders. So
(11:13):
many of us have played Bethpage Black. It is a
nightmare of a course. You know, a lot of golf courses.
If your drive goes off the off the fairway just
a little bit, just a little bit, okay, all right,
sitting up nice. It's in the rough, but it's still
a little fluffy. I could get under this ball. You're
good man. If you're off the fairway at the Black
(11:38):
Course at Bethpage State Park, you're in a fucking jungle.
That course is a nightmare to play. And like I said,
back in the day, you had to get there pretty
much in the middle of the night. The cars would
line up and that would determine who would who would
go out first, and you would sleep in your car
(11:59):
to the golf course, you know, open when the sun
came up, and then you know, everyone will get out
of their cars and get in line for Tea Times.
You weren't allowed to sign up for Tea Times back
in the day. But it's I guess it's exciting that
the Ryder Cup is out there on Long Island, which
is you know, near and dear near and dear to
my heart. So there are more light. No I don't
(12:21):
want more light. No no, no, no, no no. Uh
you stayed up too late. Well that sucks. Did Charlie
deserve please respond God, No, of course not. I already
went over the Charliekirk thing. But man, you want to
talk about conspiracies. Oh my god, everyone's talking about the
fact that the tailor guy was a patsy. They're talking
(12:45):
about the guy with the wrist pushing something. He might
have had a little weapon on his wrist. The shop
bier came from behind Charlie, and the next thing was
actually an exit wound. A lot of suspicious stuff, some
people say. And Charlie was a hologram and he's not
actually gone and he's gonna come back in the future.
(13:07):
But there is a lot of weird crap going on
around that Charlie Kirk thing. But of course, why would
I why would I say he deserved it? Of course not.
Oh why, uh, you know, here's something it's it's it's
it's uh, it's it's rare in America. But I uh,
(13:30):
I stood up for Charlie Kirk's freedom of speech his
First Amendment rights, and I stand up for Jimmy Kimmel's
freedom of speech and First Amendment rights even though he
works for a huge corporation. I understand how this works,
but I support both those guys' rights, uh to speak
their mind in America. Of course, Charlie Kirk didn't deserve it.
(13:53):
What do you what do you think about a fucking monster?
Are you all right? I hope so? Clip that ambulance bit?
That was gold. Thank you, guyro. I think you're being
sarcastic though. But anyway, do you need help called nine
(14:16):
one one? No, I don't need help. I'm good. I'm good.
Do you play video games anymore? Yeah? I do. I
play a dumb game called golf Clash. That's about it,
because I, you know, I I you know, I used
to get into video games, but I got a little
I might have a little touch, a little touch of OCD,
(14:37):
so gaming is not my friend. But I play golf
Clash on my phone. I know that's kind of a
boring one. I get it, but that's that's the one
I play lately. So there you go. You're saying, what
else is going on in the world, Well, I guess,
I guess. They indicted James call me? Who was he?
(15:00):
He was the former FBI director and the Statue of
Limitations was about to expire and Trump said, get me,
call me. So the indicted James call me. And if
you're uh, I'll simplify this one too. Man. It's very easy.
If you're a Republican, you're like, yes, get that bitch,
(15:22):
And if you're a Democrat, you're like, he's innocent. That's
what's going on with the James call me. Look, I
break it down, man. It's nice and easy. We do
it nice and easy. I got one hundred Wait, it's
super Chat Friday, and I just got some things. What
are what are ars's? Is that good? Uh uh uh
(15:42):
uh uh uh wait a minute? All right, Augustin my boyfriend,
and I send you greetings from Resisting Resistancia chocko, Argentina.
What's five hundred things? Is that good? Hey man? I'll
take your super chats though, Thank you very much, greatly
(16:03):
appreciate it. Man. You know, I got I got, I
got I got mouths to feed, I got bills to pay.
And that leads us to the next thing, government shutdown time.
Oh my god, these these two parties. Oh my god,
there's gonna be a government shutdown. And Trump is like,
I ain't meeting with you bitches. It's either my way
or the highway. We control the White House, we control everything,
(16:26):
So why would I meet with you bitches. You're gonna
you're gonna, you're you're gonna, you're gonna do it my
way or we're shutting down the goddamn government and uh,
you know, and then uh and then we suffer and
then and basically, if the government shuts down, then Trump
is gonna fire a whole bunch of people, a whole
bunch of people. Ah, oh my god. Trump with his
(16:51):
full investigation into the uh into the escalator thing. As
we sit here looking at healthcare in America just going
up and getting crazy or crazy. Could you imagine a
full investigation into the healthcare system in America? That would rule,
Of course, that would rule. All right, it's a few Friday,
do we say you have tailand all? Where are you
(17:12):
at with the tailand all? Are are you pro or
against against the tile at all? I don't know. I
don't know. I don't know. I don't know who to
no I know who to believe. I don't. I don't.
I don't listen to RFK Junior. What, Yeah, I don't don't.
I don't because see he's a he's a politician. I don't.
When it comes to medical ship, I don't. I don't
(17:33):
listen to the politicians. God, why would you I listened
to I think we all have doctors in our lives, right,
Listen to them. Here's something crazy. Listen to them. Listen
to your doctors. I got. I got a few people
in my family that are in the medical community, and
(17:54):
they're like, God, you know, just boo boo boo boo
boo boo boo boo boo boo. Uh, what are the
comments you made that Iraq wants to discuss with you? Hey, what,
Iraq's got my stupid number. If you want to talk
(18:16):
about anything, he could fucking call me. Someone told me
that he said, ah, this is just inside baseball. But
someone said that Eerch said, you know, at the end
of at the end of uh, you know the show.
I don't know if it was the Opien Anthony Show
or the show I did after Opien Anthony. We weren't
(18:38):
friends anymore, and I laughed my ass off because we weren't.
We were never like friends. I got a lot of friends.
I wouldn't consider Iraq a friend. You know, we got
along for a while there, and uh, you know, I
went over to his house a little bit, and we
went out to dinner a little bit, and uh, you know,
he came to my beach house a little bit. But
I he never he never crossed over into a true friendship.
(19:04):
Oh my god, that's what I said. It's kind of
weird that he's like, you know, by the end, we
weren't friends anymore. I'm like, I'm looking around and all
the people around me are like, you know, you've never
mentioned this guy as a friend. What is he doing.
I'm like, I don't, I don't know. I honestly don't
know what he's doing. But he's got my number. He
(19:26):
could call me anytime, anytime to discuss that garbage guyra Oh.
He gets more views than any of the Old Ona Show,
proving once again he knows how to do radio podcasting.
Slow and Steady wins the race. Oh damn, I like that. Okay,
(19:47):
we're also doing things Trump never did. Uh. Trump never
played handball. I was. I was a rock star with
the Chinese handball. We called it back in the day.
I don't know. I'm sure you can't call it Chinese handball.
But when I was growing up, I had I had
(20:08):
two dear friends. They were twins. Their mom was born
in Germany. She was in Germany during during I think
one of the World War two possibly she was a kid,
and you know where she lived was getting bombed to crap,
and she moved to America and she had these twins,
(20:30):
Martin and Norman, and they were dear friends of mine
growing up. They were no offense to them if they're watching,
because I know they check in every once in a while.
They were weirdos because they weren't really americanized. They liked
playing chess. They were very good at chess. They would
(20:53):
play in chess tournaments. They also played ping pong very
very well. They also on the weekend would do sailboat
races with their dad. They also played the weird instruments
in school. What's what's the giant one that you got
to roll around on a little wheel. One of them
(21:14):
played that when the rest of us were trying to
trying to look cool with our instrument in school. You know,
I walked around with with just drump sticks. I'm cool.
And one of the twins would, you know, roll his
giant what is it, the stand up based thing and
it had a little squeaky wheel on it where we're here,
(21:35):
would go down the hallway. You'd be doing classes as
he's rolling his giant instrument around when the rest of
us were mortified, because you know, we had our we
had our juices flow, and my god, we wanted the
we wanted the we wanted the ladies to be attracted
(21:56):
to us, even though you know, the acte was bubbling
up all over the fuck place. But you know, it
certainly didn't help if you were trying to attract the
ladies when you were rolling your instrument down the hallway.
But they didn't give a shit. Their mom played, Oh
(22:18):
my god, I haven't thought of these kids in a
long time. Their mom would put on concerts at churches,
you know, with the giant organ. And I went to
a couple of these things, and I'm like, yo, hey,
what's up? Where's your mom? And he they would point
to the rafters and she would be behind, you know,
in the back of the church, behind the organ with
(22:40):
the giant fucking pipes, and she's just jamming, putting on concerts.
This family rock, to be honest with you. But they
were very, very different. And then the other kid, the
other kid played I think the the French horn. They
picked the two worst instruments, the giant stand up bab
(23:00):
with the squeaky wheel and the French warn But let
me tell you, you know, uh, one of my friends, uh
oh oh, I didn't mention this last name. Okay, he
worked on the software that helped bring down, bring down,
bring down Osama bin Laden. He was on the he
(23:24):
was on the software team that you know, developed some
some shiit some I didn't know I was going to
talk about this maybe I maybe I could say it
more eloquently. But one of my dear friends when I
was growing up, he worked on the team that developed
a software program that helped bring down Osama bin Lauden.
(23:45):
So as I make fun of these fucking guys, oh
my god, I think they graduated one and two at
my high school too. They were They were rock stars.
But why did I mention them? Oh? I know why
because of the Chinese handball. Uh, the Chinese handball that
was the one where you had to bounce it before
the wall. Right, And we're pretty good. And I mentioned
(24:06):
recently that, you know, one of one of my childhood pastimes,
right was asses up handball, and I played with by
Martin and Norman. There's your eyes. I played with Martin
(24:27):
and Norman Chinese handball and we would play I think
it was fifty cents a game, and if you lost,
you had to give up your change and you had
to go up against the goddamn wall and they got
one shot to you know, throw the ball as hard
(24:47):
as they can and hopefully hit your fanny. So I'm
gonna go out on a limb and say, I don't
think Trump ever played asses up handball either, My god?
All right, JFK is here. Donald Trump played baseball, football,
and soccer at the New York Military Academy. All right,
there you go. So he played some sports. That's cool.
(25:09):
I'm talking about regular things, though, Man, I don't think
he did regular things. I don't think he ever went
on a bike. Can you imagine Trump on a bike,
just go for a bike ride. No, stay mad? Someone
to say it. Who's mad? Bro? Who's mad? Well? The
government shutdown? I think we can all agree in the end,
(25:33):
we can blame whatever party you want to blame. How
about that. But you know, we want shit to cost
a lot less in America. I think that's what we
all want, right. I don't think we should be celebrating
that gas prices are at three dollars and fifteen cents
a gallon. That's not something to celebrate. We're the greatest
(25:53):
fucking country in the world. Man, Our dark gas should
be even at two point fifty. I would be pissed.
We want the cost of goods to be a lot
cheaper than they are, man. We want healthcare to be affordable, man.
But instead, like, let's focus on the more important stuff.
(26:16):
You know, there was an escalator that went down at
the UN and Trump needs a full investigation behind that
when once again it was just a clad walking backwards
up the escalator and he tripped a censor and that's
what stopped the stupid thing. That's it. That's all you
need to know. That's it. That's it, Ah, tariffs, escalators,
(26:41):
hydra hydra. I like you, brother, I hope you stick around.
That's really funny. Man. Uh high, Gail, how are you
you good? I hope you're good? Good, good, good, good,
good good good. He doesn't read chat, but yeah he
(27:02):
got a d U? I who got a d U? I?
Who the fuck got it? I'm reading the chat? Who
got a d U? I? Are you all right? Man?
Are you all right? Uh? Are you all right? Joe
Biden did better? Man? No, no, no, I'm not no no, no, no, no,
(27:26):
no no. Biden didn't do Biden. He didn't do better
than No, he was. He was fucking half dead in office.
And that's on the Democrats. Oh my god, I just
don't know what happens. It's the same rap. I you
know why continued to do the same fucking rap. But Biden,
(27:50):
Uh yeah he was. He was like a walking fucking zombie.
And uh you know the Democrats. I I don't, I don't,
I don't know what happens. You got to party and
you don't focus on who could be the next guy,
and then you lazily say it's Biden. Biden should have
never been fucking president. I mean, if he was gonna
(28:11):
be if he was gonna be president, which obviously he was,
but he he should have been president years before he was.
By the time he finally decided to go for it
because the Democrats had no one else. He was too
fucking old and and and he was walking through life
half asleep. So I can't sit here and say that
(28:33):
Biden was better than Trump. Oh my yeah, oh you
know that? Uh wait, you know Trump doesn't sign bills.
He's a freeloader. Oh damn, well no he uh he
signs executive orders with that. I'll be done in a minute.
(29:00):
He signs like a sociopath. Can we at least admit that?
And then the at the end the I don't even
know what letter that is because a P doesn't go
up like that, but he ends with a at the
end of his damn thing. Yeah, rest in peace to
Charlie Kirk if he actually is no longer with us,
(29:22):
because some of the conspiracies are saying it was a hologram.
And right after the assassination, one of Charlie Kirk's people
he pulled down a camera from behind that would let
us know exactly where the shot came from. You know,
I said from day one with the Charlie Kirk that
he was under that tent in a weird you know,
(29:43):
he was under that tent and pretty much far back,
far enough that I did pretty well in math in school,
and I was pretty good with the angles and shit,
I'm like, how he was situated under that tent? How
the f did what was his name, Tyler? How the
f did he have a clear shot from the roof?
(30:04):
I said that from day one. But then this is
what I want to know. And this is like Joe
Rogan territory. You know, people talk about like patsy's, right,
they talk about the patsy's if this Tyler guy was
a patsy, Like, how does that work? I really need
(30:25):
an expert to explain how a patsy works in these
high profile cases. Because you got a kid, he's in jail,
he's got family, he's got friends, and none of them
are speaking up, going yo, he's a patsy, Yo, Yo,
he didn't do this. Yo. They're all keeping very very quiet.
And some say that he's a patsy and that the
(30:46):
real the real killer was the guy with the wrist
and the brown shirt that he kind of went like
this with his fucking shirt and next thing you know,
it lines up perfectly with the shot, the Charlie Kirk shot.
So it's like, okay, so let's just go with it.
So let's say that guy is the real shooter and
(31:08):
then you got an innocent guy in jail, but he's
a patsy? Like, how does that? How does that work
in the end? How do they set up that guy
to be the fall guy? Do they know that he
was like someone that really didn't like Charlie Kirk and
they noticed, Okay, he's gonna maybe he might try something here,
(31:30):
so we'll kind of let him set up and stuff,
but he he he ain't gonna be the one, and
then we'll take care of business down here and then
we'll arrest that guy. You know, I just don't understand
how the patsy works because there's just too many people
that would speak up, right. I mean, you know, the
Tyler guy, he's got a lawyer. Wouldn't he be yelling
at screaming it wasn't me, It wasn't me. Oh my god,
(31:53):
it wasn't me, Especially because he's got his life on
the line. Now, you know, someone like that, they absolutely
would you know, would uh would uh would uh would
would uh would uh? You know uh end his life.
I was honestly what I was thinking. There is like
YouTube has like there are weird rules you have to say,
(32:15):
like OnLive Now, it's so weird you got to say.
So I had to try to figure out what word
I can use. I want to say execute. I guess
I could say that. I don't even know if I can.
You're a nice person, Ope or Greg with Tudrie? Uh?
Greg with g excuse me, yes, thank you, thank you,
(32:37):
Good morning everybody. Hi, justin You're good all right? Op
Ster is funny and he knows how to laugh at himself. Well,
thank you, thank you, fase you know where it's at.
Thank you very very much. But we're heading into the weekend.
Uh you know, fall is in the air. My god,
are you going to be doing one of those fall
(32:59):
activities this weekend? Which which one? Which one are you
stuck doing? Could you? Could you can you answer that question?
Which one are you stuck doing? We do one that
we really really like and it's north of the city
and uh they set up holy crap, I don't eat
thousands of uh of of pumpkin lanterns and they have
(33:24):
these amazing displays. It's north of the city, you know
what on on On a future live stream, I'll let
you know exactly more of the details, but uh, we
do that. That's pretty fucking cool. All of a sudden,
this is just a path through the woods and stuff.
And they got all these lanterns and they they make
them into like art projects, and there's as as many
(33:49):
lanterns as you could possibly see, all lit up. I
like that one because I always bitch about the fall activities.
Oh my god, look at this beautiful sunrise behind me.
Look at this glorious But are you gonna be doing
some of that apple picking? Are you? Oh my god?
Who are you? I love this question? Who are you?
Who are you? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who are you? Who? Who? Who? Who?
(34:20):
Little tip? If you're gonna go apple picking, right, you
gotta think, you gotta think. You gotta think differently than
the masses. You're going. You're gonna go to an orchard
right way out into the country, maybe up into the mountains, right.
I don't know how you do it in a fucking desert.
I know some of you are watching this from some
(34:41):
kind of desert, Like, where do you go apple picking
in a desert? Do they just throw apples? Around and
you pick them up because traditional apple picking. My god,
you have to take them. You have to take the ride.
You want some apple cider for the ride. Sure, let's
get some apple cider. We'll take the ride into the mountains.
Got this, I got this out of the way place
(35:02):
that most people don't know about. Right and you get
there and it's a farm and uh, you know the
place you thought no one else knew about. There's thousands
of people there and they all got their stupid apple bucket.
And right about uh, at that point, you realize, oh,
this is gonna be like the videos I see on
Instagram where someone just gently, you know, climbs up a
(35:27):
three step ladder and then grabs an apple like this,
right grab. Oh, and you gotta you gotta twist and pull,
twist and pull, put it in your basket. That's how
your apple pick. Nah. Man, Now you're fighting, you're elbowing
your fellow man. You're trying to get to the goddamn apples.
(35:48):
No one's got a step ladder, and no one's taking
the taking the half twist pull. No one's doing that.
Here's a tip from the ope ster. Fucking don't do it.
Don't do it. Don't put yourself through that, all right,
but if you do, if you do, it's just like
(36:12):
strawberry picking too, man. Right, What you gotta do is
you grab your basket, get there fucking early, and run
run as far as you can. Cause human beings are lazy,
lazy mother efforts, and they're gonna pick all the apples
on the trees near them, So those trees suck.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Your only chance is if you could run as far
as you can to the last tree, go to that one,
and then maybe you have a chance of doing the
half twist pull down for your apples.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
Oh my god. The last time I went apple picking,
I asked the guy, I'm like, where the fuck are
the apples? He's like, you see, it was right next
to the highway. He goes, if you keep walking and
walking and walking, eventually there will be a row of
apple tree that still have apples on him. And then
we got there, This is a true story. We got
there as a young family, and you know I was
(37:08):
ready to I was ready to lift up, uh lift
up my son. You know this was before he uh
uh got as tall as me, basically could lift his
little body up. And I go, okay, do the half
the half twist pool. Now now, well, we went apple picking.
We got to the last row of trees, and uh
(37:29):
we spent our our time on all fours, crawling around
like fucking animals, going like this with the apples, picking
them up and throwing them, picking them up and throwing them,
picking them up and throwing them because every apple was bruised.
And then you're like, well, this one isn't that bruised.
I guess when we get home we could cut that
out of the fucking apple. And then we finally went
(37:50):
back to the the person behind the cash register, and
she's like, would you like some apple cider donuts with that?
I'm like, no, I wouldn't. Carl taught me we're all stale?
What who's Carl? Never mind? But he let me in
on your scam, the apple sider donuts or stale. And
the reason why none of us know this is because
(38:12):
they dip. You dip the apple cider donuts into a
into like a coffee or something get and guess what,
that rehydrates the fucking apple cider donuts. Look what you're
learning today. So we bring our bucket of bruised apples
to the cash register we say no to the apple
Sider donuts, No, thank you. No. Would you like a
(38:35):
caramel apple for your kid? No? I wouldn't. No, I
don't feel like having half their teeth in the caramel apple.
No I wouldn't. And I'm too old for that shit.
Try to keep my fucking teeth all right. Anyway, let
me see, you got one one basket of apples? Like, no,
(38:57):
we got one basket of apple bruises. Is there a
discount because all these apples? But no, no, there's not.
That'll be uh two hundred and eighty dollars. And then
we went home. We had to cut out the fucking
bruises and our apples. I'm like, man, this is not
like Instagram. This isn't like Instagram. But if you're gonna
(39:21):
do that, man for real, run to the furthest tree.
That's your best shot. I hope you would Caddy for
mafia guys, Yes, I did. I they weren't, uh, you know,
in all fairness, they weren't you know, the big uh,
the big guys that you know and love. Some of
these mafia guys you know and love one hundred percent,
(39:46):
but they were involved in those families for sure. And
they were, they were, they were big shots on Long Island,
and yes, I caddy for a bunch of them, and
most of them were absolutely fucking awesome. Every once in
a while you got one that you were scared shitless of.
I wouldn't talk to you, I said recently. Some of
these guys would have they would they would have guests.
(40:10):
You know, when you when you're a caddy, the members
are allowed to bring guests. And one of these mafia guys,
he had guests, and I look, I can only say
it this way. They looked like they were, as we
used to say, right off the boat for Italy, didn't
speak a lick of English. Uh. Their golf skills were horrendous, horrendous.
(40:34):
If they were keeping scoring, it would be at least
two hundred. They would they would shoot two hundred for
eighteen holes. And one guy had giant fucking meathands that
were all swollen and all sorts of fucked up and
had all sorts of scars. And you simply didn't ask
(40:56):
any questions, and you were you absolutely wondered why this
member had these guests at that particular time. Oh my god,
uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh
uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh
(41:17):
you're a dope. Why am I a dope? What? Usually
when someone calls me a dope, it means that, uh
I I spoke truth to power. That's where I'm gonna
go with. I'm a dope because I spoke truth to
power and it bothered you? On blast? What? What? What
was it that bothered you today? What? Me just trying
(41:38):
to make a few jokes, just a few jokes. Is
that what bothered you today? Because look, you know, let
me let me uh, let me cut to the chase.
I don't mean any of this garbage. I don't care.
I just I like turning on a livestream as the
sun's coming up behind me, and I like to have
a little fun. That's all. That's all, all right. Uh
(41:59):
Trump is the only president without a dog. Oh my god, Yeah,
there's another one. Trump never. I don't think Trump ever
owned a pet growing up. Besides golf, you really don't
know what Trump's into, which is I find interesting? How
(42:19):
about that? I find it interesting? You know, he's obviously
business all the time. Everything's about business and making money
and making deals. I get that part of it, and
it certainly gave him a great life. But besides golf,
you really don't know what Trump's into, like those little
stupid things we all like to do. Has he ever
(42:41):
just gone boating and dropped the line in the water?
Has he ever done that? Has he ever gone on
a on a on a Caribbean vacation. I just sat
there with his with his toes in the sand, drinking
some some Caribbean hottail, any of that stuff, any anything
(43:06):
like that, you and your show kicks ass, well, thank
you very much. Gas should be free. I like how
you think is a gyro or guy a guy giro?
It looks like, yeah, gas should be fucking free. Oh my,
oh my god. But I think I think that's it
for today. Nice and easy. I got I got kids
(43:28):
to get to school. Man, I will, I will, I
will turn this off and really not think of any
of the nonsense until next time we meet. But I
gotta tell you I got a brag a little bit today.
My my daughter is really into volleyball and she's kicking ass.
(43:50):
She's starting, she's playing the whole game. She was she
was named captain and uh man, she had a game yesterday.
This is the this is the stuff people you know,
don't want to hear, I guess, but grew it and
her and her team had their first victory and the
(44:11):
excitement in the gym yesterday was just phenomenal. And I
mentioned that because we all have moments like that, you
got to live in them, you gotta sit in it.
I had a little moisture in my eyes because you know,
her school team is working very, very hard. She's the
seventh grader and the team is seventh and eighth graders,
(44:35):
and she beat out all the eighth graders to start,
and she's the captain. This came out of nowhere. She's
excelling at volleyball. And I mentioned that because I don't
really mention my family much because they don't want to be.
They don't want to be part of this horseshit where
people spend their time just trying to knock me down
(44:56):
and just coming up with fucking lies day after day.
They that's that's the reason they don't want to they
don't want to be part of this horseshit. In the end,
I love doing this, but I also understand, you know,
to keep them uh private. But you know, every once
in a while, I'll talk about them in broad strokes.
(45:16):
When will you be out of money? Are you scared?
I'll never be out of money? JFK. Sorry, I know
people are waiting for that day. I'll never be out
of money. But thanks for the air. JFK. Are you
becoming a hater? By the way, I've noticed like your
comments are starting to kind of dip off into the
into the kind of hater category. You've been one of
(45:38):
mine for a long time, giving me great material. Are
you dipping into the Are you dipping your toes into
the hater category? But anyway, it was awesome yesterday. So
they got their first victory, and holy shit, the whole
gym erupted. The rest of the players ran on the court,
(45:59):
the coach is the parents, and God, what a moment.
I leave with that today, God, what a moment. That's
what's what life is about. We all have opportunities to
live in the fucking moment and really enjoy what that
what's going on in front of us. And yesterday I
was I was able to do that, and oh my god,
(46:21):
I was proud, I was excited, I was emotional, and
it was absolutely fucking awesome. It didn't hurt that my
daughter started the game with five serves in a row
that they couldn't return that fucking rock too. Oh I
love you, bro just a question. I'm worried for you now, man.
(46:42):
I'll always have money there JFK. I no. I know
people are praying and hoping that I go broke, which
is fucking creepy. You know what did I What did
I do to you? I'll always have money. I want
to make I want to make more money, though I
don't make as much money as I used to. So
when someone gives me a super chat, oh my god,
I get excited. Of course I do. Of course I'm
(47:04):
gonna look up that guy that gave me five hundred things?
Should we do the math on that really fast? And
than I could go where's the five hundred things? Oh
my god, you guys are babbling? Huh yeah. My numbers
have gone gone up significantly in the morning with the
live stream. And you know, another lie out there, people
think of buying views or something. Why would anyone buy views?
(47:26):
That's insanely stupid. Oh my god, as I spin the chat, okay,
what is ars? Let me look up what I got? Oh, here,
I'll put it on the screen. I'll land with this AARs,
I mean that looks exciting. Can I like get the
(47:47):
family sushi tonight on this guy's five hundred ars five hundred.
It's from Argentina, right, AARs to us. D Oh my god,
I leave you with this Augustine, thank you, by the way,
(48:10):
but he sent me five hundred ars's I just looked
it up in American money. In American money, that's thirty
seven cents. Jesus, I made. I made, I made. Oh
my god, I made thirty seven cents this morning. Jesus.
(48:37):
All right, Maybe I am going broke. Maybe I am
going broke. Oh my god, I made thirty seven cents
to talk to you guys today. I fucking rule by
There we are. Good morning, everybody. Welcome to the Opie
Radio podcast. As the son comes up behind me there
here in New York City. My god, we got breaking
news right off the bat. Donald J. Trump has ordered
a full investigation into the Epstein files. Finally. Oh wait,
(00:22):
I read that wrong. He's actually has ordered a full
investigation into the escalator that stopped at the UN. I
got that wrong. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I apologize for that.
It is f you, Friday. Make sure you let us
know in the chat what has bothered you recently or
this week. Yeah, the escalator is a big FU. Trump is.
(00:44):
Trump is in the chat and he said f escalators.
You know. Famously earlier this week he went to the
UN to give one of his speeches, and he's with
Milania and they're getting ready to go up the escalator
and then the escalator stops dead in its tracks. A
lot of people saying it's a conspiracy, that was some
(01:06):
kind of plot to possibly take out Trump and then
Trump because you know, he was born with a silver
spoon in his mouth. I don't think the guy's ever
driven a car. I don't think he has a driver's license.
I don't think Trump ever jumped in a pool. I
don't think Trump ever got on a paddle board. I
don't think Trump ever took a little ride upstate to
(01:29):
check out the Fall Foliage. So, uh, when the escalator,
excuse me, stopped, Trump was like, what is that? I
don't know, I don't know how to walk upstairs, so
he just stopped and stood there. Jesus, But there's a
(01:50):
there's a logical explanation for the escalator stopping at the
un even though Trump has demanded a full investigation into
the thing, it turns out that there was a photographer. Uh,
he was on the escalator with the Trumps, and he
was on the escalator going backwards so he could get
(02:12):
his his video or his pictures or both. And because
of this clod being on the escalator backwards, he he
he he he he uh. Isn't that the noise of
(02:34):
an ambulance in England? He haw he haw he He
tripped a censor and that's what stopped the escalator. That's it.
That's all it is. There's there's nothing more. I know.
You guys that do conspiracy theories all over the internet,
oh my god, you'll have a twelve parts series on
all sorts of angles with the escalator and and you'll
(02:57):
you'll milk it to the cows come home. But in
the end it was just a clod going up the
escalator backwards with his camera ko Jan k jan ko
jan kochink and he tripped a censor and that's what
stopped the escalator. All right. With that, I said, good
morning to Jerry Shep Bardini. Good morning, Open squad, Good
morning to you, Jerry Shep Bardini. Welcome, welcome, welcome, Hi,
Nick High, Ted Pallawata. We got Tyler saying fake views fake?
(03:23):
What's the fake views there? Tyler? Explain your fake views concept?
You all right? Tyler? Edy Violin up there at already
high high high. We got the Jay Warren. I was
very bothered by Darryl Kaby on the subway. Who's that?
(03:45):
I swear to God, who's that? Can help me out
with that one too, Sir? Looking haggard? Oh my boy,
I'm not looking haggard. I'm looking fucking beautiful. Look at
those baby blue eyes. You're trying too hard with your
Hey bitch, what's up? Scot watching up? How are you
you good? I hope you good? Ah, brother man, brother
man coming in from the spawn. What's up, spawning? How
(04:08):
are you? What are the bets this weekend? Who are
you taking? I need to know, man, there's a lot
of corruption in sports, right spawn. They made the gambling
so legal that it's so it's getting harder and harder
for these these players not to not to go for
the temptation of dropping a ball, making it look like like,
(04:34):
you know, it wasn't dropped on purpose. And then there's
some koching, koching koching on the side. Right, it's making
it harder and harder for these athletes to play it,
to play it straight. Oh by god, I think more
and more, more and more of that is going to
come out of the in the coming months. I think,
you know, players suspicious plays that you know should have
(04:59):
should have been caught because you know, the person wants
to make a few bucks, a few bucks on the side,
wants to make way more money than the salary he's
getting for playing his sport. Maybe the silver spoon was
in a concrete bag. Charles says, Look, man, I think
it's pretty obvious that you know the Trumpster. I don't
(05:20):
think the Trumpster ever played street hockey. I don't think
the Trumpster ever got on a skateboard. I don't think
the young Trumpster just just as a goof decided to,
you know, jump a little rope. You know. Trump was
just born, just born to be rich, just born to
(05:43):
be taken care of, just born to just do business.
And speaking of which, oh my god, this is breaking.
I forgot about this one. Trump is basically, see I
read between the headlines. Trump is basically he's gonna He's
gonna control the TikTok. Yes, he is. Everyone knows the TikTok.
(06:09):
You know, it was spying on all of us, this
Chinese company as we're doing our silly, fucking TikTok videos.
I think half of America has TikTok. That would be
what would that be? What would that be? I wrote
it down, one hundred and seventy million of us have TikTok.
And then it came out, oh my god, the Chinese
they're spying on us, They're stealing our information. We got
(06:31):
to control the TikTok. And the funny part about that
when they said that the Chinese were spying on us,
you know, and it's very very dangerous. This was coming
from politicians that were on the say it with me.
They were also on the TikTok. So if it was
(06:51):
so dangerous and the Chinese were spying on us, why
were our politicians also on the TikTok? I ask you
that question today. But Trump, Uh, he signed an executive order.
Oh my god, these executive orders with that, with that
exhausting Trump signature, and then he does that weird at
(07:20):
the end. Oh my god. I think Trump has the
most exhausting signature in the history of man. I I
don't even know what there's not There's not that many
letters in his name. He's just he's just adding letters.
Oh by, can you imagine going out to dinner with
the Trump? I got this, And then he's signing. He's
signing his his his bill are rubers here, I'm just
(07:53):
signing the check at the end. If you watched him
sign executive orders, you understand there at the end. Okay,
But he uh, he signed an executive order at the
White House yesterday. They just hand him those things. He's
signing them left and right. Oh my god, maybe he
(08:15):
could sign executive order to bring my career back. Anyway,
he signed an order. Uh, he's he has approved a
TikTok deal. This is the this is the the workaround, right. Uh,
(08:36):
It's gonna continue operating in the United States of America.
But I think this is the this is the pinnacle
of TikTok. And I think, just like a lot of
other social media platforms, I think I think the down,
the downturn is going to start, uh in the in
the in the coming months because Trump has decided, Look,
you know, we're gonna keep TikTok alive in America, but
(08:59):
I'm gonna control it. He's basically saying I'm going to
control it, and he basically said it's not gonna it's
not gonna lean lean one way or the other politically.
That's what That's what I learned as I was getting
ready for this live stream. Trump approves TikTok deal, and
we'll be run by close Trump allies. That means Trump
will be running Oh my god, a UFO is going
(09:21):
by my window. Too bad, I don't have the camera
pointed that way. But he's going to control it. And
TikTok has valued at you know, fourteen billion dollars. My god,
So there there you have it. Why the hell we
(09:41):
up right now? Man? That's A, that's a very good question, Joel.
I get that a lot, you know, with the Ryder
Cup out there and uh in Beth Page, Uh, you know,
getting up this early, it just reminds me of the
only other real job I had, and I was being
a caddie, and you had to be at the golf
course before the sun came up if you wanted a loop, Yo, Lou,
(10:03):
where's my loop? Lou is my caddy master, and he
would call young greggy, young greggy pants off the caddy
bench to uh, you know, take a couple of bags, actually,
a couple of bags and a couple of putters. I
would caddy for foursomes. Yeah, you put two heavy bags
on your shoulders and yeah, you carry the two putters
(10:26):
of the two guys in the cart, and you went
around a goddamn golf course in four hours. My god.
So for me, this is like, this is easy to
get up this early, very very easy. Although I'm sleeping
in uh lately, I used to get up at four
four thirty, but now I'm squeezing to five thirty. Now
that's good. That's a. That's an improvement. But they're doing
(10:51):
the Rider Cup. Who cares on long Island. You know,
it's us against them who cares? And I love my golf,
but it's it's it's a fake. It's a fake us
against them tournaments. Uh, but they're playing the beth Page
Black And what what is cool? For me? And a
lot of golfers and a lot of Long Islanders. So
(11:13):
many of us have played Bethpage Black. It is a
nightmare of a course. You know, a lot of golf courses.
If your drive goes off the off the fairway just
a little bit, just a little bit, okay, all right,
sitting up nice. It's in the rough, but it's still
a little fluffy. I could get under this ball. You're
good man. If you're off the fairway at the Black
(11:38):
Course at Bethpage State Park, you're in a fucking jungle.
That course is a nightmare to play. And like I said,
back in the day, you had to get there pretty
much in the middle of the night. The cars would
line up and that would determine who would who would
go out first, and you would sleep in your car
(11:59):
to the golf course, you know, open when the sun
came up, and then you know, everyone will get out
of their cars and get in line for Tea Times.
You weren't allowed to sign up for Tea Times back
in the day. But it's I guess it's exciting that
the Ryder Cup is out there on Long Island, which
is you know, near and dear near and dear to
my heart. So there are more light. No I don't
(12:21):
want more light. No no, no, no, no no. Uh
you stayed up too late. Well that sucks. Did Charlie
deserve please respond God, No, of course not. I already
went over the Charliekirk thing. But man, you want to
talk about conspiracies. Oh my god, everyone's talking about the
fact that the tailor guy was a patsy. They're talking
(12:45):
about the guy with the wrist pushing something. He might
have had a little weapon on his wrist. The shop
bier came from behind Charlie, and the next thing was
actually an exit wound. A lot of suspicious stuff, some
people say. And Charlie was a hologram and he's not
actually gone and he's gonna come back in the future.
(13:07):
But there is a lot of weird crap going on
around that Charlie Kirk thing. But of course, why would
I why would I say he deserved it? Of course not.
Oh why, uh, you know, here's something it's it's it's
it's uh, it's it's rare in America. But I uh,
(13:30):
I stood up for Charlie Kirk's freedom of speech his
First Amendment rights, and I stand up for Jimmy Kimmel's
freedom of speech and First Amendment rights even though he
works for a huge corporation. I understand how this works,
but I support both those guys' rights, uh to speak
their mind in America. Of course, Charlie Kirk didn't deserve it.
(13:53):
What do you what do you think about a fucking monster?
Are you all right? I hope so? Clip that ambulance bit?
That was gold. Thank you, guyro. I think you're being
sarcastic though. But anyway, do you need help called nine
(14:16):
one one? No, I don't need help. I'm good. I'm good.
Do you play video games anymore? Yeah? I do. I
play a dumb game called golf Clash. That's about it,
because I, you know, I I you know, I used
to get into video games, but I got a little
I might have a little touch, a little touch of OCD,
(14:37):
so gaming is not my friend. But I play golf
Clash on my phone. I know that's kind of a
boring one. I get it, but that's that's the one
I play lately. So there you go. You're saying, what
else is going on in the world, Well, I guess,
I guess. They indicted James call me? Who was he?
(15:00):
He was the former FBI director and the Statue of
Limitations was about to expire and Trump said, get me,
call me. So the indicted James call me. And if
you're uh, I'll simplify this one too. Man. It's very easy.
If you're a Republican, you're like, yes, get that bitch,
(15:22):
And if you're a Democrat, you're like, he's innocent. That's
what's going on with the James call me. Look, I
break it down, man. It's nice and easy. We do
it nice and easy. I got one hundred Wait, it's
super Chat Friday, and I just got some things. What
are what are ars's? Is that good? Uh uh uh
(15:42):
uh uh uh wait a minute? All right, Augustin my boyfriend,
and I send you greetings from Resisting Resistancia chocko, Argentina.
What's five hundred things? Is that good? Hey man? I'll
take your super chats though, Thank you very much, greatly
(16:03):
appreciate it. Man. You know, I got I got, I
got I got mouths to feed, I got bills to pay.
And that leads us to the next thing, government shutdown time.
Oh my god, these these two parties. Oh my god,
there's gonna be a government shutdown. And Trump is like,
I ain't meeting with you bitches. It's either my way
or the highway. We control the White House, we control everything,
(16:26):
So why would I meet with you bitches. You're gonna
you're gonna, you're you're gonna, you're gonna do it my
way or we're shutting down the goddamn government and uh,
you know, and then uh and then we suffer and
then and basically, if the government shuts down, then Trump
is gonna fire a whole bunch of people, a whole
bunch of people. Ah, oh my god. Trump with his
(16:51):
full investigation into the uh into the escalator thing. As
we sit here looking at healthcare in America just going
up and getting crazy or crazy. Could you imagine a
full investigation into the healthcare system in America? That would rule,
Of course, that would rule. All right, it's a few Friday,
do we say you have tailand all? Where are you
(17:12):
at with the tailand all? Are are you pro or
against against the tile at all? I don't know. I
don't know. I don't know. I don't know who to
no I know who to believe. I don't. I don't.
I don't listen to RFK Junior. What, Yeah, I don't don't.
I don't because see he's a he's a politician. I don't.
When it comes to medical ship, I don't. I don't
(17:33):
listen to the politicians. God, why would you I listened
to I think we all have doctors in our lives, right,
Listen to them. Here's something crazy. Listen to them. Listen
to your doctors. I got. I got a few people
in my family that are in the medical community, and
(17:54):
they're like, God, you know, just boo boo boo boo
boo boo boo boo boo boo. Uh, what are the
comments you made that Iraq wants to discuss with you? Hey, what,
Iraq's got my stupid number. If you want to talk
(18:16):
about anything, he could fucking call me. Someone told me
that he said, ah, this is just inside baseball. But
someone said that Eerch said, you know, at the end
of at the end of uh, you know the show.
I don't know if it was the Opien Anthony Show
or the show I did after Opien Anthony. We weren't
(18:38):
friends anymore, and I laughed my ass off because we weren't.
We were never like friends. I got a lot of friends.
I wouldn't consider Iraq a friend. You know, we got
along for a while there, and uh, you know, I
went over to his house a little bit, and we
went out to dinner a little bit, and uh, you know,
he came to my beach house a little bit. But
I he never he never crossed over into a true friendship.
(19:04):
Oh my god, that's what I said. It's kind of
weird that he's like, you know, by the end, we
weren't friends anymore. I'm like, I'm looking around and all
the people around me are like, you know, you've never
mentioned this guy as a friend. What is he doing.
I'm like, I don't, I don't know. I honestly don't
know what he's doing. But he's got my number. He
(19:26):
could call me anytime, anytime to discuss that garbage guyra Oh.
He gets more views than any of the Old Ona Show,
proving once again he knows how to do radio podcasting.
Slow and Steady wins the race. Oh damn, I like that. Okay,
(19:47):
we're also doing things Trump never did. Uh. Trump never
played handball. I was. I was a rock star with
the Chinese handball. We called it back in the day.
I don't know. I'm sure you can't call it Chinese handball.
But when I was growing up, I had I had
(20:08):
two dear friends. They were twins. Their mom was born
in Germany. She was in Germany during during I think
one of the World War two possibly she was a kid,
and you know where she lived was getting bombed to crap,
and she moved to America and she had these twins,
(20:30):
Martin and Norman, and they were dear friends of mine
growing up. They were no offense to them if they're watching,
because I know they check in every once in a while.
They were weirdos because they weren't really americanized. They liked
playing chess. They were very good at chess. They would
(20:53):
play in chess tournaments. They also played ping pong very
very well. They also on the weekend would do sailboat
races with their dad. They also played the weird instruments
in school. What's what's the giant one that you got
to roll around on a little wheel. One of them
(21:14):
played that when the rest of us were trying to
trying to look cool with our instrument in school. You know,
I walked around with with just drump sticks. I'm cool.
And one of the twins would, you know, roll his
giant what is it, the stand up based thing and
it had a little squeaky wheel on it where we're here,
(21:35):
would go down the hallway. You'd be doing classes as
he's rolling his giant instrument around when the rest of
us were mortified, because you know, we had our we
had our juices flow, and my god, we wanted the
we wanted the we wanted the ladies to be attracted
(21:56):
to us, even though you know, the acte was bubbling
up all over the fuck place. But you know, it
certainly didn't help if you were trying to attract the
ladies when you were rolling your instrument down the hallway.
But they didn't give a shit. Their mom played, Oh
(22:18):
my god, I haven't thought of these kids in a
long time. Their mom would put on concerts at churches,
you know, with the giant organ. And I went to
a couple of these things, and I'm like, yo, hey,
what's up? Where's your mom? And he they would point
to the rafters and she would be behind, you know,
in the back of the church, behind the organ with
(22:40):
the giant fucking pipes, and she's just jamming, putting on concerts.
This family rock, to be honest with you. But they
were very, very different. And then the other kid, the
other kid played I think the the French horn. They
picked the two worst instruments, the giant stand up bab
(23:00):
with the squeaky wheel and the French warn But let
me tell you, you know, uh, one of my friends, uh
oh oh, I didn't mention this last name. Okay, he
worked on the software that helped bring down, bring down,
bring down Osama bin Laden. He was on the he
(23:24):
was on the software team that you know, developed some
some shiit some I didn't know I was going to
talk about this maybe I maybe I could say it
more eloquently. But one of my dear friends when I
was growing up, he worked on the team that developed
a software program that helped bring down Osama bin Lauden.
(23:45):
So as I make fun of these fucking guys, oh
my god, I think they graduated one and two at
my high school too. They were They were rock stars.
But why did I mention them? Oh? I know why
because of the Chinese handball. Uh, the Chinese handball that
was the one where you had to bounce it before
the wall. Right, And we're pretty good. And I mentioned
(24:06):
recently that, you know, one of one of my childhood pastimes,
right was asses up handball, and I played with by
Martin and Norman. There's your eyes. I played with Martin
(24:27):
and Norman Chinese handball and we would play I think
it was fifty cents a game, and if you lost,
you had to give up your change and you had
to go up against the goddamn wall and they got
one shot to you know, throw the ball as hard
(24:47):
as they can and hopefully hit your fanny. So I'm
gonna go out on a limb and say, I don't
think Trump ever played asses up handball either, My god?
All right, JFK is here. Donald Trump played baseball, football,
and soccer at the New York Military Academy. All right,
there you go. So he played some sports. That's cool.
(25:09):
I'm talking about regular things, though, Man, I don't think
he did regular things. I don't think he ever went
on a bike. Can you imagine Trump on a bike,
just go for a bike ride. No, stay mad? Someone
to say it. Who's mad? Bro? Who's mad? Well? The
government shutdown? I think we can all agree in the end,
(25:33):
we can blame whatever party you want to blame. How
about that. But you know, we want shit to cost
a lot less in America. I think that's what we
all want, right. I don't think we should be celebrating
that gas prices are at three dollars and fifteen cents
a gallon. That's not something to celebrate. We're the greatest
(25:53):
fucking country in the world. Man, Our dark gas should
be even at two point fifty. I would be pissed.
We want the cost of goods to be a lot
cheaper than they are, man. We want healthcare to be affordable, man.
But instead, like, let's focus on the more important stuff.
(26:16):
You know, there was an escalator that went down at
the UN and Trump needs a full investigation behind that
when once again it was just a clad walking backwards
up the escalator and he tripped a censor and that's
what stopped the stupid thing. That's it. That's all you
need to know. That's it. That's it, Ah, tariffs, escalators,
(26:41):
hydra hydra. I like you, brother, I hope you stick around.
That's really funny. Man. Uh high, Gail, how are you
you good? I hope you're good? Good, good, good, good,
good good good. He doesn't read chat, but yeah he
(27:02):
got a d U? I who got a d U? I?
Who the fuck got it? I'm reading the chat? Who
got a d U? I? Are you all right? Man?
Are you all right? Uh? Are you all right? Joe
Biden did better? Man? No, no, no, I'm not no no, no, no, no,
(27:26):
no no. Biden didn't do Biden. He didn't do better
than No, he was. He was fucking half dead in office.
And that's on the Democrats. Oh my god, I just
don't know what happens. It's the same rap. I you
know why continued to do the same fucking rap. But Biden,
(27:50):
Uh yeah he was. He was like a walking fucking zombie.
And uh you know the Democrats. I I don't, I don't,
I don't know what happens. You got to party and
you don't focus on who could be the next guy,
and then you lazily say it's Biden. Biden should have
never been fucking president. I mean, if he was gonna
(28:11):
be if he was gonna be president, which obviously he was,
but he he should have been president years before he was.
By the time he finally decided to go for it
because the Democrats had no one else. He was too
fucking old and and and he was walking through life
half asleep. So I can't sit here and say that
(28:33):
Biden was better than Trump. Oh my yeah, oh you
know that? Uh wait, you know Trump doesn't sign bills.
He's a freeloader. Oh damn, well no he uh he
signs executive orders with that. I'll be done in a minute.
(29:00):
He signs like a sociopath. Can we at least admit that?
And then the at the end the I don't even
know what letter that is because a P doesn't go
up like that, but he ends with a at the
end of his damn thing. Yeah, rest in peace to
Charlie Kirk if he actually is no longer with us,
(29:22):
because some of the conspiracies are saying it was a hologram.
And right after the assassination, one of Charlie Kirk's people
he pulled down a camera from behind that would let
us know exactly where the shot came from. You know,
I said from day one with the Charlie Kirk that
he was under that tent in a weird you know,
(29:43):
he was under that tent and pretty much far back,
far enough that I did pretty well in math in school,
and I was pretty good with the angles and shit,
I'm like, how he was situated under that tent? How
the f did what was his name, Tyler? How the
f did he have a clear shot from the roof?
(30:04):
I said that from day one. But then this is
what I want to know. And this is like Joe
Rogan territory. You know, people talk about like patsy's, right,
they talk about the patsy's if this Tyler guy was
a patsy, Like, how does that work? I really need
(30:25):
an expert to explain how a patsy works in these
high profile cases. Because you got a kid, he's in jail,
he's got family, he's got friends, and none of them
are speaking up, going yo, he's a patsy, Yo, Yo,
he didn't do this. Yo. They're all keeping very very quiet.
And some say that he's a patsy and that the
(30:46):
real the real killer was the guy with the wrist
and the brown shirt that he kind of went like
this with his fucking shirt and next thing you know,
it lines up perfectly with the shot, the Charlie Kirk shot.
So it's like, okay, so let's just go with it.
So let's say that guy is the real shooter and
(31:08):
then you got an innocent guy in jail, but he's
a patsy? Like, how does that? How does that work
in the end? How do they set up that guy
to be the fall guy? Do they know that he
was like someone that really didn't like Charlie Kirk and
they noticed, Okay, he's gonna maybe he might try something here,
(31:30):
so we'll kind of let him set up and stuff,
but he he he ain't gonna be the one, and
then we'll take care of business down here and then
we'll arrest that guy. You know, I just don't understand
how the patsy works because there's just too many people
that would speak up, right. I mean, you know, the
Tyler guy, he's got a lawyer. Wouldn't he be yelling
at screaming it wasn't me, It wasn't me. Oh my god,
(31:53):
it wasn't me, Especially because he's got his life on
the line. Now, you know, someone like that, they absolutely
would you know, would uh would uh would uh would
would uh would uh? You know uh end his life.
I was honestly what I was thinking. There is like
YouTube has like there are weird rules you have to say,
(32:15):
like OnLive Now, it's so weird you got to say.
So I had to try to figure out what word
I can use. I want to say execute. I guess
I could say that. I don't even know if I can.
You're a nice person, Ope or Greg with Tudrie? Uh?
Greg with g excuse me, yes, thank you, thank you,
(32:37):
Good morning everybody. Hi, justin You're good all right? Op
Ster is funny and he knows how to laugh at himself. Well,
thank you, thank you, fase you know where it's at.
Thank you very very much. But we're heading into the weekend.
Uh you know, fall is in the air. My god,
are you going to be doing one of those fall
(32:59):
activities this weekend? Which which one? Which one are you
stuck doing? Could you? Could you can you answer that question?
Which one are you stuck doing? We do one that
we really really like and it's north of the city
and uh they set up holy crap, I don't eat
thousands of uh of of pumpkin lanterns and they have
(33:24):
these amazing displays. It's north of the city, you know
what on on On a future live stream, I'll let
you know exactly more of the details, but uh, we
do that. That's pretty fucking cool. All of a sudden,
this is just a path through the woods and stuff.
And they got all these lanterns and they they make
them into like art projects, and there's as as many
(33:49):
lanterns as you could possibly see, all lit up. I
like that one because I always bitch about the fall activities.
Oh my god, look at this beautiful sunrise behind me.
Look at this glorious But are you gonna be doing
some of that apple picking? Are you? Oh my god?
Who are you? I love this question? Who are you?
Who are you? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who are you? Who? Who? Who? Who?
(34:20):
Little tip? If you're gonna go apple picking, right, you
gotta think, you gotta think. You gotta think differently than
the masses. You're going. You're gonna go to an orchard
right way out into the country, maybe up into the mountains, right.
I don't know how you do it in a fucking desert.
I know some of you are watching this from some
(34:41):
kind of desert, Like, where do you go apple picking
in a desert? Do they just throw apples? Around and
you pick them up because traditional apple picking. My god,
you have to take them. You have to take the ride.
You want some apple cider for the ride. Sure, let's
get some apple cider. We'll take the ride into the mountains.
Got this, I got this out of the way place
(35:02):
that most people don't know about. Right and you get
there and it's a farm and uh, you know the
place you thought no one else knew about. There's thousands
of people there and they all got their stupid apple bucket.
And right about uh, at that point, you realize, oh,
this is gonna be like the videos I see on
Instagram where someone just gently, you know, climbs up a
(35:27):
three step ladder and then grabs an apple like this,
right grab. Oh, and you gotta you gotta twist and pull,
twist and pull, put it in your basket. That's how
your apple pick. Nah. Man, Now you're fighting, you're elbowing
your fellow man. You're trying to get to the goddamn apples.
(35:48):
No one's got a step ladder, and no one's taking
the taking the half twist pull. No one's doing that.
Here's a tip from the ope ster. Fucking don't do it.
Don't do it. Don't put yourself through that, all right,
but if you do, if you do, it's just like
(36:12):
strawberry picking too, man. Right, What you gotta do is
you grab your basket, get there fucking early, and run
run as far as you can. Cause human beings are lazy,
lazy mother efforts, and they're gonna pick all the apples
on the trees near them, So those trees suck.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Your only chance is if you could run as far
as you can to the last tree, go to that one,
and then maybe you have a chance of doing the
half twist pull down for your apples.
Speaker 1 (36:46):
Oh my god. The last time I went apple picking,
I asked the guy, I'm like, where the fuck are
the apples? He's like, you see, it was right next
to the highway. He goes, if you keep walking and
walking and walking, eventually there will be a row of
apple tree that still have apples on him. And then
we got there, This is a true story. We got
there as a young family, and you know I was
(37:08):
ready to I was ready to lift up, uh lift
up my son. You know this was before he uh
uh got as tall as me, basically could lift his
little body up. And I go, okay, do the half
the half twist pool. Now now, well, we went apple picking.
We got to the last row of trees, and uh
(37:29):
we spent our our time on all fours, crawling around
like fucking animals, going like this with the apples, picking
them up and throwing them, picking them up and throwing them,
picking them up and throwing them because every apple was bruised.
And then you're like, well, this one isn't that bruised.
I guess when we get home we could cut that
out of the fucking apple. And then we finally went
(37:50):
back to the the person behind the cash register, and
she's like, would you like some apple cider donuts with that?
I'm like, no, I wouldn't. Carl taught me we're all stale?
What who's Carl? Never mind? But he let me in
on your scam, the apple sider donuts or stale. And
the reason why none of us know this is because
(38:12):
they dip. You dip the apple cider donuts into a
into like a coffee or something get and guess what,
that rehydrates the fucking apple cider donuts. Look what you're
learning today. So we bring our bucket of bruised apples
to the cash register we say no to the apple
Sider donuts, No, thank you. No. Would you like a
(38:35):
caramel apple for your kid? No? I wouldn't. No, I
don't feel like having half their teeth in the caramel apple.
No I wouldn't. And I'm too old for that shit.
Try to keep my fucking teeth all right. Anyway, let
me see, you got one one basket of apples? Like, no,
(38:57):
we got one basket of apple bruises. Is there a
discount because all these apples? But no, no, there's not.
That'll be uh two hundred and eighty dollars. And then
we went home. We had to cut out the fucking
bruises and our apples. I'm like, man, this is not
like Instagram. This isn't like Instagram. But if you're gonna
(39:21):
do that, man for real, run to the furthest tree.
That's your best shot. I hope you would Caddy for
mafia guys, Yes, I did. I they weren't, uh, you know,
in all fairness, they weren't you know, the big uh,
the big guys that you know and love. Some of
these mafia guys you know and love one hundred percent,
(39:46):
but they were involved in those families for sure. And
they were, they were, they were big shots on Long Island,
and yes, I caddy for a bunch of them, and
most of them were absolutely fucking awesome. Every once in
a while you got one that you were scared shitless of.
I wouldn't talk to you, I said recently. Some of
these guys would have they would they would have guests.
(40:10):
You know, when you when you're a caddy, the members
are allowed to bring guests. And one of these mafia guys,
he had guests, and I look, I can only say
it this way. They looked like they were, as we
used to say, right off the boat for Italy, didn't
speak a lick of English. Uh. Their golf skills were horrendous, horrendous.
(40:34):
If they were keeping scoring, it would be at least
two hundred. They would they would shoot two hundred for
eighteen holes. And one guy had giant fucking meathands that
were all swollen and all sorts of fucked up and
had all sorts of scars. And you simply didn't ask
(40:56):
any questions, and you were you absolutely wondered why this
member had these guests at that particular time. Oh my god,
uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh
uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh
(41:17):
you're a dope. Why am I a dope? What? Usually
when someone calls me a dope, it means that, uh
I I spoke truth to power. That's where I'm gonna
go with. I'm a dope because I spoke truth to
power and it bothered you? On blast? What? What? What
was it that bothered you today? What? Me just trying
(41:38):
to make a few jokes, just a few jokes. Is
that what bothered you today? Because look, you know, let
me let me uh, let me cut to the chase.
I don't mean any of this garbage. I don't care.
I just I like turning on a livestream as the
sun's coming up behind me, and I like to have
a little fun. That's all. That's all, all right. Uh
(41:59):
Trump is the only president without a dog. Oh my god, Yeah,
there's another one. Trump never. I don't think Trump ever
owned a pet growing up. Besides golf, you really don't
know what Trump's into, which is I find interesting? How
(42:19):
about that? I find it interesting? You know, he's obviously
business all the time. Everything's about business and making money
and making deals. I get that part of it, and
it certainly gave him a great life. But besides golf,
you really don't know what Trump's into, like those little
stupid things we all like to do. Has he ever
(42:41):
just gone boating and dropped the line in the water?
Has he ever done that? Has he ever gone on
a on a on a Caribbean vacation. I just sat
there with his with his toes in the sand, drinking
some some Caribbean hottail, any of that stuff, any anything
(43:06):
like that, you and your show kicks ass, well, thank
you very much. Gas should be free. I like how
you think is a gyro or guy a guy giro?
It looks like, yeah, gas should be fucking free. Oh my,
oh my god. But I think I think that's it
for today. Nice and easy. I got I got kids
(43:28):
to get to school. Man, I will, I will, I
will turn this off and really not think of any
of the nonsense until next time we meet. But I
gotta tell you I got a brag a little bit today.
My my daughter is really into volleyball and she's kicking ass.
(43:50):
She's starting, she's playing the whole game. She was she
was named captain and uh man, she had a game yesterday.
This is the this is the stuff people you know,
don't want to hear, I guess, but grew it and
her and her team had their first victory and the
(44:11):
excitement in the gym yesterday was just phenomenal. And I
mentioned that because we all have moments like that, you
got to live in them, you gotta sit in it.
I had a little moisture in my eyes because you know,
her school team is working very, very hard. She's the
seventh grader and the team is seventh and eighth graders,
(44:35):
and she beat out all the eighth graders to start,
and she's the captain. This came out of nowhere. She's
excelling at volleyball. And I mentioned that because I don't
really mention my family much because they don't want to be.
They don't want to be part of this horseshit where
people spend their time just trying to knock me down
(44:56):
and just coming up with fucking lies day after day.
They that's that's the reason they don't want to they
don't want to be part of this horseshit. In the end,
I love doing this, but I also understand, you know,
to keep them uh private. But you know, every once
in a while, I'll talk about them in broad strokes.
(45:16):
When will you be out of money? Are you scared?
I'll never be out of money? JFK. Sorry, I know
people are waiting for that day. I'll never be out
of money. But thanks for the air. JFK. Are you
becoming a hater? By the way, I've noticed like your
comments are starting to kind of dip off into the
into the kind of hater category. You've been one of
(45:38):
mine for a long time, giving me great material. Are
you dipping into the Are you dipping your toes into
the hater category? But anyway, it was awesome yesterday. So
they got their first victory, and holy shit, the whole
gym erupted. The rest of the players ran on the court,
(45:59):
the coach is the parents, and God, what a moment.
I leave with that today, God, what a moment. That's
what's what life is about. We all have opportunities to
live in the fucking moment and really enjoy what that
what's going on in front of us. And yesterday I
was I was able to do that, and oh my god,
(46:21):
I was proud, I was excited, I was emotional, and
it was absolutely fucking awesome. It didn't hurt that my
daughter started the game with five serves in a row
that they couldn't return that fucking rock too. Oh I
love you, bro just a question. I'm worried for you now, man.
(46:42):
I'll always have money there JFK. I no. I know
people are praying and hoping that I go broke, which
is fucking creepy. You know what did I What did
I do to you? I'll always have money. I want
to make I want to make more money, though I
don't make as much money as I used to. So
when someone gives me a super chat, oh my god,
I get excited. Of course I do. Of course I'm
(47:04):
gonna look up that guy that gave me five hundred things?
Should we do the math on that really fast? And
than I could go where's the five hundred things? Oh
my god, you guys are babbling? Huh yeah. My numbers
have gone gone up significantly in the morning with the
live stream. And you know, another lie out there, people
think of buying views or something. Why would anyone buy views?
(47:26):
That's insanely stupid. Oh my god, as I spin the chat, okay,
what is ars? Let me look up what I got? Oh, here,
I'll put it on the screen. I'll land with this AARs,
I mean that looks exciting. Can I like get the
(47:47):
family sushi tonight on this guy's five hundred ars five hundred.
It's from Argentina, right, AARs to us. D Oh my god,
I leave you with this Augustine, thank you, by the way,
(48:10):
but he sent me five hundred ars's I just looked
it up in American money. In American money, that's thirty
seven cents. Jesus, I made. I made, I made. Oh
my god, I made thirty seven cents this morning. Jesus.
(48:37):
All right, Maybe I am going broke. Maybe I am
going broke. Oh my god, I made thirty seven cents
to talk to you guys today. I fucking rule by
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My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.